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carmenberzattosgf · 11 days

Text

NSFW alphabet : carmen berzatto

Content: fem reader, pure filth, size kink (easily skippable), daddy kink (easily skippable), dom/sub dynamics,

Word count: 5605

A/N: This is really filthy. I got a bit carried away as you can tell by the word count. Enjoy ! <<3

A = Aftercare (What they're like after sex)

He’s a clinger. Carmy gets needy and touchy after sex, so he’s not going to leave your side. After normal sex, he lays on top of you for awhile because he loves the closeness of the physical contact. He’s pressing kisses all over your neck and mumbling how much he loves you over and over again. When it’s finally time to get up, he’s bringing a warm cloth from the bathroom to clean up between your legs. He’s so sweet and tender in moments like this, diligent in cleaning up the cum from your thighs.

After a dom/sub type of scene, Carmy takes such good care of you. Beforehand he stashes everything he needs beside the bed so he doesn’t have to leave you afterwards. He stores the supplies in a wicker bin: pH balanced sensitive skin-safe wipes, a bottle of water, protein bars and other snacks (i.e chocolate), soothing ointment, your favorite t-shirt of his, hair ties, and even one of those instant ice packs if you need it.

If you’re in that floaty place, he narrates every single thing he’s doing. Even though you can’t speak, he still wants to make sure you’re aware of what he’s doing before he does it.

“Okay, baby I’mma put your hair up into a messy bun to get it off your neck.”

“It’s going to be a little bit cold at first but I’m using these wipes to clean up between your legs.”

“I’m going to roll you over so I can take care of your bottom, and put some ointment on for you. I’ve already got a pillow to support your stomach.”

Carmy is so gentle while he takes care of you. It’s his favorite part of a scene, not getting off, but tending to you.

“Sweetheart, I need you to try and sit up so you can take some sips of water. Can you do that for me?”

You’re stubborn and just wanna fall asleep in that floaty place so Carmen literally has to prop you up with pillows and force a straw between your lips.

“Three big sips—there we go. Atta girl, good job.”

The best part of aftercare is saved for last, cuddling. Carmy lays you on top of his chest so you’re not laying on your raw backside, and softly pets your hair until you fall asleep.

B = Body Part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner's)

He likes his hands. They do everything for him in the kitchen. They’re skilled and precise. Carmy is not the type of guy to be really into parts of his body, but his hands are alright.

Now for you, he genuinely loves all of your body. Your face, your eyes, everything. However, he’s a major boob guy. He likes them in all sizes. He just loves tits (peep the mommy issues). One of his favorite parts of sex is getting to leave bite marks all over your chest. Send him a nude with your tits in it? Bye! He’s a goner.

Thighs come in close second. He grips your thighs so hard during sex that sometimes you can make out small finger sized bruises in the mirror afterwards. Much like your boobs, he loves to mark up your thighs with hickies. He knows that he’s the only one that gets to see those marks so he leaves a bunch.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum, basically)

He’s obsessed with cumming inside of you. The sight of his cum dripping out of your cunt for the first time permanently rewires his brain. He’s convinced there’s no better feeling that filling you up with his cum. He’s nasty about it too, pressing any that has dripped out of you back into your cunt with his fingers.

“Gotta keep you nice and filled up for me. I don’t want anything to go to waste. Here—“ He reaches for a pillow and lifts up your hips, placing it under your back. “There we go. Now it can’t spill out.”

If he can’t cum inside of you, he cums on your stomach. The thing about Carmy is that he cums a lot, like the volume is massive. When he cums on your stomach, you’re covered in him. He’ll be fisting his cock for a good twenty seconds before the spurts of cum finally slow down. It’s all over you, dripping off of your hips onto the sheets. The first thing Carmy does is reach over for his phone on the bedside table. He takes a picture of you from the neck down, completely painted with white. The picture immediately goes into his locked camera folder.

Finally, Carmy would rather cum in your mouth than on your face. He doesn’t want to get any in your eye. He’s truly a sweetheart (sometimes). Once, you stuck out your tongue full of cum for him, and his hard on came right back. His body was ready to go again after seeing his cum drip off of your tongue, down your neck, and into your cleavage. He’s a simple man at heart.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He really wants to try shibari with you, like really bad. He’s been researching heavily into it, about all of the knots and the types of rope. He doesn’t want to get into serious stuff like suspension, but he wants to cover your body in pretty and elaborate knots. Carmy’s mainly focused on the types of shibari that restrains your arms behind your back, making your chest jut out. He wants to surround your breasts with intricate knots. He might mess around with some patterns on your hips and thighs, but he’d rather tie up your arms, not your legs.

He’s drawn to shibari because it’s almost mixing art intimacy ( because shibari doesn’t have to involve sex or pleasure). It’s a time that he can spend getting close to you while you’re letting go and trusting him completely. The tying up process isn’t short; it can take awhile. He thinks it would make your relationship stronger, and also let him be dominate in a way that’s different from just straight up sex.

It will take him a very very long time to ever bring it up to you, though. He doesn’t want to freak you out or make you uncomfortable. He understands how much control a person is giving up when someone restrains them.

In all seriousness, you probably ask him about it after you see a tab open on his laptop. He’s already left for work for the day and forgot to close out the tab. You grab his laptop, wanting to do the daily mini, and when you open it up, you’re met with an in depth rope tying tutorial.

You decide to tread carefully on the topic when he gets home from work that day, since it seems like he was keeping it a secret. Once he’s gotten a shower, Carmy curls up with you on the couch to watch a little tv before going to bed.

“I saw something interesting today, Carm.”

“Yeah? What might that be, baby?”

“Well, I was using your laptop to do the daily mini like I always do, and I saw a tab pulled up. Something to do with ropes?” Carmy instantly tenses up like he’s entered freeze mode.

“Oh—uh, uhm. Sorry you’re probably like—freaked out now and—“ Carmy says quickly, without taking a breath. He’s on the verge of hyperventilating.

“Baby, baby. Calm down. You’re all good. Nothing to be embarrassed about.” You start to comb through his hair with your fingers, massaging at his scalp in a way that relaxes him. “Why don’t you tell me all about it, yeah?”

He does just that, explaining shibari and all the research he’s done into it. Carmy’s a bit surprised when you agree to it without any hesitation.

“You know you don’t have do to this for me. I’m not going to be upset if you say no.”

“I trust you, Carmen. I love you and I know you’ll take care of me and keep me safe. If I don’t like it I’ll be honest with you.”

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they're doing?)

This one is going to heavily depend on when you get into a relationship with Carmy. When he’s newly in New York, trying to become the greatest chef of all time? He’s horribly inexperienced. He barely knows how to interact with the opposite sex without getting red in the face. However, he’s eager to learn! He might not know exactly what he’s doing in the moment with you, but he wants you to feel good. He’s determined to make you orgasm. He asks what feels good and what doesn’t feel good. Carmy’s not afraid to ask you questions during sex either.

Now if you meet him after he’s back in Chicago, he has more experience under his belt. New York and all of the places he traveled to during those years away from home gave him opportunities to become more confident with sex. Although, he still gets nervous about it, especially when he’s sleeping with someone for the first time. The awkwardness hasn’t gone away completely.

At this point in your relationship with Carmy, he knows what he’s doing. He pays attention to your body and the way you react to his touch. Carmy learns what you like before you even have the chance to tell him. Every touch of his hands is purposeful to bring you pleasure.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying)

Missionary. No question about it. He wants to be able to look at you while he fucks you. He loves the closeness of the position, getting to feel your legs wrapped around his waist. It’s so intimate, and Carmy craves that intimacy. His favorite part of missionary is when you both are so close to the edge, with your foreheads resting against each other. He gets to look in your eyes and praise you. “You’re so pretty. So fucking gorgeous—fuck, baby.”

“Taking me so well— always take me so well.” “Love you, love you, love you so much.”

Oh, and his other favorite part about missionary is getting to kiss you. He fucking loves kissing you during sex. Sure, it’s messy, with teeth and lips clashing together half the time, but he cannot get enough of your mouth. That moment when you have to break the kiss to moan out because of how good he feels inside of you is what he loves about kissing you in missionary.

Carmy also enjoys anything that lets him see your face. With your legs over each of his shoulders, he’s found he can hit even deeper inside of you. Don’t worry, he puts a small pillow underneath the small of your back to make you comfortable. The angle makes your eyes roll back.

If he’s honest with himself he fucking loves the position where he practically forces your thighs to meet your chest. His cock his so fucking deep inside of you he just has to make comments about it. “That too deep? Yeah? Can you feel me in your stomach?” Oh, and when he starts pressing his hand on your lower stomach so you can feel him moving in and out of you? The sensation is almost too much.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment? Are they humorous? etc.)

This is Carmen Berzatto here. He’s so serious about everything, and that applies to sex, too. He’s just not the type to joke around during sex. He craves the intimacy of sex and doesn’t want to make light of the connection. That doesn’t mean sex with Carmy is overly serious. More so that he would rather not incorporate humor into sex.

H = Hair (How well-groomed are they? Does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Carmy is so neat and meticulous. He literally cuts pieces of tape with a knife so it has a clean edge. With all things considered, he keeps it neat downstairs. Definitely not bald, but he trims up frequently. He cannot stand it when it’s crazy down there.

For his partner? He does not give a fuck about the grooming of down there. Not one single bit. Do whatever you want and he will still be a happy man.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment? The romantic aspect.)

So intimate. Genuinely, he’s so romantic. Carmy’s kissing all over your body, praising every inch of your skin. It’s honestly jarring at first how intimate and intense he can be in the bedroom. Carmy puts his all into sex, much like he puts his all into the kitchen. He holds you so close the entire time. If you’re riding him on the couch? Yeah, he’s got both arms wrapped around you so your chest is pressed to his. This lets him make eye contact if he wants, or lets him moan into the crook of your neck. Carmy literally wants as much of his skin touching yours as possible during sex. Even if he has you on your stomach, he’s not going to settle for just doggy style because there’s not enough contact. Instead he’s leaning over you holding you up so your back presses against his chest. He sloppily kisses your shoulders and the back of your neck from this position.

Let’s talk about eye contact—he’s staring right through you. He’s just so observant and doesn’t want to miss a single expression you make. God, the look in his eyes during sex practically puts you under a spell. He looks down at you through the bottom of his eyes with blown out pupils.

So yeah Carmy makes sex extremely intimate every time without fail.

J = Jack off (Masturbation Headcanon)

Most of the time when Carmy jacks off it’s all about efficiency. He’s not trying to take time out of his day to get off. He’s the type to get off in the shower after work. It’s quick and rough, but he knows how to get himself off fast.

Now, when you first come into his life? His routine changes a bit. Before you two start dating, Carmy masturbates to the idea of you. He honestly hates himself a bit for it, but it happens on accident.

He hops out of the shower after work, puts on a pair of boxer briefs, and sits down on his couch. He didn’t touch himself in the shower, wanting to build up the tension a little bit.

When Carmy starts touching himself, his hands move slowly. Recently, he’s learned how much he likes teasing himself. So, he palms over his covered length, applying the right amount of pressure to make his hips twitch. Without even realizing it, Carmy’s mind wanders to you.

You’ve been plaguing his mind all week long in the kitchen. Sydney assigned your prep to be right next to his, and he hasn’t been able to keep his mind off of you. In the kitchen, he keeps getting distracted by your pretty smile, and by the little jokes you make during the lunch rush.

Gradually, the hand steadily pressing down on his hard length isn’t his own anymore. Instead he pictures your hand as the one working on him; that delicate, dainty hand of yours he’s watched prep food all week.

Carmy gives up on teasing himself once the images of you pop into his head. He hastily pushes down his boxers to his thighs. The tip of his cock leaks with precum, dripping onto his length. Carmy’s head falls back in a choked moan when he finally grips himself. His heart races as he gently strokes his cock. It’s much different from his usual fast pace, but he’s trying to picture how you would do it; on how your hands would be so delicate compared to his callused ones. Carmy wonders if you would tease him, or if you would be dead set on bringing him to orgasm quickly.

It’s a slippery slope when Carmen starts to picture you taking his cock into your mouth. His hand starts to pump faster as the image grows more vivid in his mind. He’s lost the gentleness of his movements, but he doesn’t care. The only thing he cares about is the vision of you on your knees in front of him. Your lips are swollen as they stretch around his cock. He thinks about the sounds you would make—how you would moan with his dick taking up your mouth. Spit would dribble from your lips onto your chin as you bob your head on his length. What brings him to the edge, though, is the idea of fucking your face. He would hold your head delicately in his hands, but thrust with his hips deep into your throat. Tears would slip from your eyes as he shoves you all the way down so your nose meets the skin above his dick.

Carmy cums hard all over his stomach, wishing it was your throat instead. He swears he blacks out for a second from the pleasure. When the post orgasm clarity hits, he hastily cleans himself up. Carmy tells himself he won’t do it again, picture you while he’s masturbating, but he knows that’s a load of bullshit.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Breeding— Carmy and breeding go together like peanut butter and jelly. It’s why he’s always cumming inside of you. He wants to show everyone your his, and what’s a better way than knocking you up with his kid? He’s low key obsessed with the idea of getting you pregnant.

Overstimulation— Carmy’s a soft dom. He wants to make you cum over and over and over again before he even thinks about orgasming. His goal is for your head to be spinning by the end of it.

Spanking— Carmy’s into spanking, okay? However, before he even thinks about doing it in the bedroom he talks to you about it multiple times at length. He clarifies a safe word with you and establishes your limits. You do the same thing with him because safe words and boundaries go both ways! Normally, he’s only going to spank you as a punishment for something. The way you whimper and moan in his lap as he spanks you makes him so hard. It honestly gives Carmy a rush to see you dripping from his hand coming down on your ass.

Size kink— It’s definitely arises from insecurities about his height, let’s be honest here. Regardless of your height though, Carmy just likes feeling that he’s bigger than you. It’s why he’s so ripped. No matter how tall you are he’s got enough muscle to hold you down in bed. Now, if you are shorter than him, even better.

The size kink appears in other ways other than just pure body size. For one, it drives him crazy how much smaller your hands are compared to his. Seeing your dainty hand wrapped around his cock drives Carmy up the wall. You can barely wrap your fingers all the way around his length.

He loves to watch as your cunt takes his fingers. They’re so much wider and longer than your own, so he goes slow.

Finally, his size kink comes into play most when he’s fucking you. He’s soothing you while he works his cock into your cunt. Once he’s all the way in, he can’t help but point out of the sight of him inside of you. “Look. You see that?” Carmy asks while drawing your attention to the small bulge in you stomach, right above your mound. It’s hard to see when he’s not moving, so he lightly thrusts in deeper so the bulge moves.

“F-fuck, yeah— I can see that,” you whine in response. Carmy’s hand moves over the bulge and he presses down, hard, before he starts rolling his hips into you at a quick pace.

“Such a good girl taking my cock like this. I’m surprised it even fit, baby. Taking me so fucking well.”

Praise— He loves giving praise and being praised. He’s calling you everything. His love, his good girl, his princess, his baby. He’s telling you how good you’re doing for him, and how perfect you are for him.

“Made for me. You know that? Fucking perfect.”

“You’re so pretty. My pretty girl.”

“I love you so much. Fuck—you feel so good, squeezing me like that—shit.”

And you offer praise back in return because goodness knows Carmy needs to hear it after all those years being insulted in the kitchen.

“You’re so pretty, too. You make me feel so good, Carmy.”

“Love these muscles,” you say while feeling his abs as he thrusts into you. “So hot how strong you are, baby.” Those types of comments from you make his brain short circuit.

Daddy kink— Okay, nothing turns him on more than being called daddy. It just, does something to his brain. A pretty girl like you? Calling him daddy? Begging him to fuck you? Yeah, he’s close to cumming in his pants from that. It’s just the soft dom thing he has going for him. He wants to take care of you in every way possible, make you feel good, and provide for you.

“Please daddy, need you,” you beg.

“I got you sweet girl. Daddy’s going to take care of you, don’t worry.”

L= Location (Favourite places to do the do)

He prefers a good old mattress. It’s basic but it’s private and comfortable. Carmy also likes fucking on a couch, too. Mainly because if he’s started getting hot and heavy on a couch, he’d rather fuck you there than carry you to the bedroom. He’s all about efficiency!

Part of him enjoys fucking at the restaurant. Not all the time, though, but there’s something about fucking you in a locked office that really gets him going. He has to keep his palm clasped over your mouth to keep you quiet. Whenever he has sex with you at the restaurant, it’s always fast, rough, and passionate. Usually, it’s to release stress, but even if it’s not, you’re going to have trouble walking straight afterwards. Richie makes an all knowing face when you walk out of the office, and heat builds up in your cheeks as you get out of the front doors as fast as possible.

Oh, and Carmy loves to get on his knees and eat you out while you’re sitting on the kitchen counter at his apartment.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Anything. Anything at all. When he’s into someone, he’s into them. Your touch alone can be enough to turn him on.

With that being said, there are some specific things that drive Carmy crazy. For one, you wearing his clothes.

One time you walked into the Bear before opening hours wearing one of his classic white t-shirts. He thought he was about to have a brain aneurysm seeing you in his clothes. The way the fabric draped over your body— yeah he had to take you back into the office as soon as you walked into the restaurant.

Speaking of clothes, dresses and skirts are his favorite articles of clothing on you. He thinks that you look so very pretty in them, and he also likes the easy access.

As mentioned in K, if you whisper anything in his ear involving the word “daddy”, he’s dragging you off somewhere immediately.

Thinking about this specifically at some kind of chefs’ gala. Carmen’s been in a circle of chefs from around the area talking for what feels like hours, now. All you want to do right now is go home. You make your way up to Carmy, and balance on your tiptoes to whisper in his ear. “Are you going to be done soon, daddy? I’d rather go home and spend time with you.”

You can see the way Carmy’s hands tighten around the glass in his hand before he speaks to the people around him. “If you’ll excuse me, folks. My girl isn’t feeling well so I’m going to take her home. Glad to have gotten to talk to you all.”

Yeah, Carmy drives to the darkest part of the parking lot and tells you to get into the back seat. He can’t wait until he gets home to fuck your brains out.

N = No (Something they wouldn't do, turn-offs)

Anything that would actually hurt you. He limits stuff like spanking to just his hand. He refused to use anything else for impact play. He won’t do CNC ever. Like never ever.

Carmy also won’t be a full on sub himself. He loves control, and needs to be in control to have a good time. The idea of losing control and being tied up is enough to send him into a panic attack.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Carmy loves eating pussy. He wants to stay in between your legs all day long. He won’t shut up about how good you taste. “So good, baby. Wanna taste some?” He’ll say before pressing a soaking wet finger to your lips.

There’s so much to say about munch Carmen. He’s so fucking good at it, too. He alternates between licking and sucking at your clit in a way that makes your vision go blurry. He knows enough about your anatomy to pull back the hood with his thumb so he can suck right on the exposed bud. The first time he does it, you swear stars explode in your field of vision.

He just LOVES eating you out! He gets to look up at you with those big blue eyes as you writhe against his face in pleasure. It makes him feel useful and needed, if he’s being honest. He could probably cum just from eating you out. The feeling of your fingers tugging in his hair, the sounds of your cries in his ears, and the pressure of your thighs closing around his head makes Carmy moan into your cunt like a madman.

So yeah Carmy prefers to give head, but that doesn’t mean he’ll stop you from blowing him. He tends to not last as long, though. Your warm mouth around him, sucking and licking at his tip. The way your take him all the way back in your throat. Fuck— the feeling of you gagging around him as his cock hits the back of your throat. He’s praising you the entire time, too.

“Look at you—fuck. Taking my cock in that pretty mouth of yours so well.”

“So good, baby. So fucking good with your mouth—holy shit.”

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

The answer is all of the above. Most of the time he prefers to take his time with you because he wants to savor the moment with you. Carmy’s favorite way to fuck you is slow and deep. He wants you to feel him all the way in your stomach. If he’s in a mood, however, he’s all for being fast and rough. Ultimately his pace is going to be whatever gets you off the best.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Quickies aren’t his favorite thing ever, but he has them often. He hates how busy his work is purely because it prevents him from having sex with you as often and as long as he would like to. Quickies usually happen at the restaurant in his office. That’s where a fast and rough pace comes into play, because there’s one goal in mind; Get off, and get off fast before someone notices. If there’s just way too many people in the restaurant, he’s not opposed to taking you in the backseat of his car for a quick fuck.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment? Do they take risks? etc.)

Oh he’s for sure open to experimenting in the bedroom. He will try just about anything that you’re willing to try.

As for risks, he’s down to take calculated risks. However, once he fucked you in the restaurant bathroom while the place was still the beef because the office didn’t have a lock (He fixed that during the remodel). It was all going great until Fak started banging on the door shouting that he was about to piss himself. Real mood killer. Now, Carmy is more careful about the risks he takes.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for? How long do they last?)

Carmy can last for quite awhile. He has so much pent up energy that he can keep going and going. He won’t admit it, but he one hundred percent thinks about his time at Noma to keep himself from cumming. He only has to do it sometimes, though.

Additionally, Carmy is a two rounds max kind of a guy. There’s just only so many times that he can cum before he’s going to pass out from exhaustion. Remember, he did fall asleep on a prep table that one time.

T = Toys (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Carmy doesn’t haven’t any toys for himself. His hand has always done the job, and he saw no reason to get something else.

With you, he’ll use a toy from time to time, but it’s rare. He’d much rather make you squirm with his own hand, or his mouth than with a toy. It gives him a sense of pride when he’s made you shake without using anything other than his own body.

Now, I can see him buying you a really expensive vibration to use while he’s away on trips. As long as you face time him when you use it so he can get off too, of course.

U = Unfair (How much they like to tease)

Carmen is such a fucking tease. He loves teasing you in and out of the bedroom with his words. When it comes to in the bedroom, half of the fun for him is teasing. He’s running the head of his cock through your folds mumbling stuff like:

“Want me to put it in, baby? I can feel how wet you are right now.”

“C’mon. You gotta say it with your words. I don’t know what you want unless you tell me, honey.”

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He groans a lot into your neck. Curses a bunch too, like strings of curse words. Carmen can get pretty loud if he’s feeling really good. When he’s close to cumming, Carmen’s voice degrades into a whine that makes you dig your nails into his back to hear it again. As it reaches that point, he doesn’t care how desperate he sounds. “N-need you to cum. Please cum for me, baby. Need to f-feel you cum around my cock.”

W = Wild Card (A random headcanon for the character)

One word. Choking. Carmy loves choking. He’s on top of you and wraps his hand around your throat just enough to cut off the blood circulation for half a second. You go absolutely crazy when his hand wraps around your throat because the euphoria is so intense. It’s like you’re on cloud nine.

Sometimes when he’s fucking you from behind he wraps his bicep around your neck to have the same affect on you.

Alternatively, Carmen realizes that he also enjoys being choked, at least a little bit. It happens naturally when you're on top riding him. His head falls back and exposes his neck, so you just reach forward and squeeze a little. Carmy’s eyes pop wide open as he feels the blood rush to his head. It’s so blissful he’s just laying with his head thrown back and his mouth open as you release the pressure.

“Does that feel good for you, too?” you ask. Carmy can’t even speak, he just nods dumbly at your question. “That’s why I love it so much when you do it to me, Carm.” When you squeeze again, he’s spilling into you with a choked groan.

X = X-ray (Let's see what's going on under those clothes)

His cock is so fucking thick oh my god. It’s a bit longer than average length wise, but the girth is massive. You’re not even sure you can take it when he pulls his cock out for the first time. He has to fuck you so slow the first time you have sex because the stretch is just so much. He spends at least the first five minutes inside of you staying completely still to let you adjust to his size. The last thing he wants to do is hurt you.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

He’s down to have sex whenever and wherever (as long as it’s private). Carmy feels like he doesn’t fuck you enough as is, which is why you two are increasingly having quickies in his office as his time becomes more consumed by the Bear.

Z = Zzz (How quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Carmy is very much awake up until the point he finishes your aftercare. Meanwhile the second you cum you’re fighting your eyelids begging Carmy to cuddle you to sleep. He has a job to do, though, he needs to clean you up, and carry you to the bathroom so you don’t get a UTI. Once he’s finished with after care he’s out like a light with you tucked in his arms, resting on his chest.

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euphternal · 1 month

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hiii i love your work!!

since you’re starting to write about her can you please write emily engstler gf headcanons?? 💗💗

emily engstler x reader gf headcanon 👩🏼‍❤️‍💋‍👩🏼

notes: THANK YOU SO MUCH ANGELLL 🥹 and duhhh obvs <3 taglist form, if anyone wants to be tagged in my works!! @imsobabygiirl @bibella8swan @xxloveralways14 @sunkissed-zegras 🎀 and my requests are open !!!

ᝰ.ᐟ

ᝰ morning rituals: emily's training schedule starts early, but she never leaves without a good morning kiss and a quick breakfast together, often sharing smoothies and discussing the day ahead.

ᝰ supportive sidelines: you attend all of emily's games, wearing her team jersey and leading the cheers in the stands. your enthusiasm for her passion fills both of you with joy and pride.

ᝰ post-game rituals: after every game, win or lose, you meet emily outside the locker room with her favorite post-game snack—chocolate protein bars—and a reassuring smile or celebratory hug.

ᝰ recovery days together: on her rest days, you both enjoy slow, lazy mornings followed by a day spent binge-watching your favorite shows or exploring new local spots together.

ᝰ fitness partners: sometimes, you join emily for her lighter workout sessions. while she practices her shots, you jog around the court or do yoga on the sidelines, keeping each other motivated.

ᝰ social media fans: u manage a small fan page for emily, posting highlights from her games and cute couple selfies, celebrating both her athletic achievements and your relationship milestones.

ᝰ quiet evenings: on nights before her games, you help emily relax and get into the zone with a quiet evening at home, sometimes involving gentle stretches together, or you reading out loud while she soaks in a warm bath.

ᝰ travel companions: whenever emily has away games, you often travel with her, turning these trips into mini-vacations where you both explore new cities, trying out local foods and attractions.

ᝰ learning & growth: you've learned the basics of basketball to better understand emily's world, and she in turn shows interest in your hobbies, creating a beautiful exchange of interests and passions.

ᝰ celebrations: every milestone in emily's career is a reason for celebration. whether it's a small victory or a major championship win, you organise a special evening for her, complete with her friends, family, and lots of laughter.

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heabitfruity · 1 month

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Silly Hobbies: Primarch Edition

Apparently I wrote too much according to tumblr, so I'm sorry if it's choppy :[

Lion El'Johnson - He actually really loves analyzing "literature"; but not normal literature like Shakespeare or Kafka. He likes analyzing things like The U.S Constitution and The Treaty of Versailles. He does this because he thinks it will help him diplomatically (it doesn't, nobody gets why he does it otherwise, not even his sons).

Fulgrim - This man knows how to dance to every K-Pop song known to man. He can throw it back to "Baby Got Back" and has tried to teach Sanguinius and Ferrus Manus how (It didn't go well, Ferrus threw his back out ). This man knows the exact choreography to "Womanizer", "Nude" and so many other songs.

Perturabo - He likes making useless contraptions; like infomercial level sort of inventions. He has invented bread-dogs, a time-machine to go back exactly two seconds for each use, a voice-recording recorder, etc. He uses Dorn to test it out, despite their... feelings for one another. He knows that Dorn will give him a blunt answer; even if he is told that the invention is "stupid".

Jaghatai Khan - He's really good at acrobatics, specifically everything with the asymmetrical bars; this man could easily escape a pack of dogs with a pen in his pocket (If anyone gets this reference I will be so proud). He attempted to teach Angron how to do the basics, but it didn't go that well; the man is just simply not flexible enough yet.

Leman Russ - This is a secret that he will take to his grave because he suffers from major internal misogyny. He knows how to knit, and he's REALLY good. He grew up on a planet that is 75% of the time below zero, of course the second he got ahold of yarn and wool he got to making warm things for his marine-sons! However, he plays it off as things like: "the citizens of Fenris have donated these for our cause".

Rogal Dorn - He likes making massive forts, societies and various massive structures in Minecraft, with Legos, Lincoln Logs, and those small, ceramic Christmas towns. They're usually quite extensive, but not extravagant. He will pester Perturabo and Magnus to look at them, and this often leads to debates about how these civilizations would function.

Konrad Curze - He teaches cooking classes; however, they are not pleasant. At the end of meal prep, all students are covered in blood due to Konrad butchering whatever protein they had prepared. The food actually tastes amazing, however the process of making it is certainly a battle within itself. Sevatar is his sous chef, which means he frequently has to do most of the work that isn't butchering.

Sanguinius - Honestly, animal rehabilitation. I know this sounds absolutely odd, but due to him having wings, he has to know how to keep a healthy batch of feathers! He's excellent at bird handling, and actually really enjoys it. He's saved at least 54 birds (he doesn't get to find many, his sons typically try to steer him away).

Ferrus Manus - Dude actually makes some really mean jewelry; like the man makes the permanent ankle chains, ring engravements, earrings (with the help of Fulgrim). He's made a lot for his brothers like Leman, Fulgrim, Magnus, and the Khan. They're all very appreciative (though Ferrus has to make Leman a special mixture so he doesn't chew through it by accident).

Angron - He does extreme sports! It helps focus on something that doesn't direct his anger at things that he doesn't need to focus on. It's somewhat funny to think of him riding a BMX, but his absolute favorite is bungee-jumping! He has forced demanded that his sons and brothers try it to "toughen them up". However, nobody except Konrad wanted to. (They both had a great time! One of the few times they've actually bonded over anything.)

Guilliman - He enjoys grading papers... He enjoys signing up to grade the essays of AP classes on Terra and does it every year if he has the time. He takes the pleasure of learning things about literary merit from other people's perspectives, and every time it makes him consider becoming a professor (even though it would be highly impractical).

Mortarion - He enjoys escape rooms, especially with Konrad and Horus. They actually usually have a great time, though sometimes they have to stop Konrad from digging into the walls. He actually commissioned Perturabo to make an elaborate escape room with hatches and secret pathways all around a set of shipping containers. It was so fun that he actually decided to keep it. (He still discovers new routes and puzzles in it every time he goes in.)

Magnus the Red - He plays Dungeons and Dragons with Khan, Guilliman, Perturabo and Alpharius and Omegon. He ALWAYS is the Dungeon Master, no matter what. This is not because he is selfish and possessive (he is a little), but because nobody in the group can seem to maintain a regular gaming schedule. They have simply resorted to Magnus being the godly controller of their games.

Horus Lupercal - This man fishes. I'm sorry, he does the straight, white man fishing and poses. He takes pictures of the fish with the awkward raised arm but genuine smile. He sometimes gives the fish to Konrad, however, less so after finding out from his students what happens during his classes.

Lorgar Aurelian - He writes fanfiction. He likes to show Magnus and Horus his angsty stuff. This stuff is even enough to make Magnus cry a little. Lorgar, however, also writes smut. I believe that this man has never had the intimate touch of any person. Not because he's celibate, but because he's a bitch. The smut's written like in the early days of Wattpad. It's disastrously bad (Think "his meat-cicle entered her mound"). Leman found it one time, he tormented Lorgar for weeks with it.

Vulkan - He bakes! He has learned all the favorite sweets of all of his brothers, making sure to surprise them occasionally whenever they haven't spoken in a while. He loves it whenever there are big events, gives him a chance to see all of his brothers and see them enjoy his work. (There have been some small altercations due to people hoarding food)

Corvus - He likes fashion; but not in a New York fashion week way, more of an Edna from The Incredibles way. He uses the help of Ferrus and Leman to help sew cloaks, shape up boots, and they use Sanguinius and Fulgrim to model it to make sure it looks good and it works.

Alpharius Omegon - They like mimicking their brothers as much as possible; in a "try to look exactly like them" way. It is actually really impressive, even going past the uncanny valley vibe. This led to Mortarion walking in on two versions of himself standing at his bedroom door and it made him piss his pants; and nobody believed him when he told the rest of them.

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samkerrworshipper · 4 months

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narcotics | arsenal x reader

summary: reader has a drug problem.. her arsenal teammates help her to realise and overcome it

warnings: mentions of drugs use and abuse

this was so tough to write for me and hit home sooo fucking hard buttt also very fulfilling so i hope you enjoy

You’d never intended for it to get this bad.

Injury, surgery, recovery, drugs.

So many drugs.

That was what happened when you had major surgery, when you were an athlete, they showered you with every single kind of drug that they could, to distract from the pain and to try and start the recovery process as soon as possible. It was good, especially post surgery when you felt absolutely no pain, it was great, and it allowed you to be a lot more mobile after the operation than you would have been if you hadn't been medicated.

It was good, being pain free was so incredibly good.

That was all you could focus on, your whole recovery revolved around being pain free, tearing your tricep was a pain in the ass, but as far as football was regarded, you were hopeful to return to the pitch as soon as possible.

You didn’t need your arm to kick a football or play on the pitch, so the whole entire focus of your recovery was to make the pain bearable so you could return to the field as soon as possible.

For this reason, the doctors just kept refilling your scripts, handing you bottles and bottles upon pills, it was their job to get you back on the field to help Arsenal redeem themselves from the fall from the champions league.

You were back on the pitch in three weeks, which was almost psychotic considering that your tricep scars were still bandaged and covered in gauze.

It was procedural for you, you fell into a routine of relying on the drugs to get you through a game, to take off the edge of the pain that originated in your arm.

It was fine, it was good.

For months, the doctors filled the bottles for you, they kept filling them, past the point of where you medically needed them anymore, it was just routine for you, just a part of your day.

You woke up, and you took pills with your morning protein shake and breakfast, then you car pooled to London Colney with Beth and Viv. Once you arrived at training you ate a protein bar, which you consumed another set of pills with. Then typically as a team there would be a morning gym session, after gym there was lunch, where you would consume another set of pills. Then there was training, afterwards before recovery you inhaled another set of pills.

It didn’t really worry you, you needed the pills, they were the reason you were able to play, they were the only thing that was keeping you on the pitch.

It felt that way to you at least, even if you were months past the injury, it just felt like you needed them, that without them you would be hopeless.

So, even as the weeks passed by you continued your routine, but as every day passed by it was clear that your teammates were becoming more aware of your reliance, the concern and questions becoming far more frequent.

You insisted that you were fine, that it was the doctor's orders, even if the doctor had told you months ago that you needed to eventually wean yourself off the pills.

He was the same doctor though who continued to fill your scripts and hand you pills like they were candies.

Eventually you would stop, you would, some time, it was just something to get you through the day, something to make it easier for you to deal with everything that was happening in your life.

The first time the word addiction was thrown at you was in the most abnormal situation.

You were sitting in the locker rooms, early on a wednesday morning the likes of Katie, Jen, Beth and Alessia surrounding you as you all casually joked around.

It was all common conversation, trivial basic stuff, until Katie pivoted towards you, her whole body turning in your direction as she sent a question your way.

“Y/n, is there any history of addiction in your family?”

It’s spoken so casually, and for whatever reason you’re the only person in the group taking a double take over what she’d just asked you.

Everybody else was just kind of waiting for your answer, all eyes on you as they watched on carefully.

“No, why?”

Katie just nods her head, her eyes not leaving you and the curiosity in them.

“Just curious, Less and I were talking earlier about it, one of her cousins struggled with it majorly after having surgery, just interesting to think about, it’s just a really tough topic.”

It was blatantly obvious that there was an underlying message underneath her words, at the time though you had been completely oblivious to it.

“Yeah, well I couldn’t give any info on that, both of my parents were in the army and were as clean as whistles, my two brothers were the same, and as far as my aunts and uncles go I’m fairly certain they’ve never touched any drugs beyond paracetamol and tylenol.”

Your words are measured, calculated, trying to decrypt the overarching question lying beneath the surface of Katie’s random spiel.

“It’s definitely interesting to think about, considering how many surgeries our team has encountered in the last little while.”

Katie is digging around, for something, but you aren’t quite sure what.

“I’m not the one to ask about it, Viv and Beth are the ones who have been doing all the research.”

Katie seems to get the message that you don’t want to talk, but you can’t ignore the way she continues to look at you with a mixture of concern and annoyance whilst you tugged on your uniform and trainers.

When you thought her eyes had slipped from you, you turned into your locker, taking a sip of water before pulling two pills from your bag and slipping them past your lips as discreetly as you could.

You thought you were discreet, but when you turned back around to head out of the rooms and into the gym, and realised that all of your teammates' eyes were on you, you realised that this whole ordeal had become quite the spectacle.

You ignored the on looking eyes, especially those of Katie and Beth’s, which were practically burning holes through your body.

You avoided their eye contact, knowing that if you met their eyes it would give them a space to confront you, something which you were looking to avoid for as long as possible.

You somehow managed to make it into the gym without any further troubles, but when you did make it inside the gym you were met with some similar looks from your teammates and captains who were already occupying the space.

You got straight into your program, your mind reeling about how exactly your teammates had come to the point of pretty much accusing you of addiction.

You weren’t addicted.

You just needed the pills to take the edge off, there was nothing wrong with knowing your body's limit. Sure, you’d been told it was safest to start weaning off them after about a month on them, but you needed them, you needed them to be the same you, the old you, the pre-injury you.

You weren’t an addict, addicts were frantic and uncontrolled and definitely couldn’t play football.

The gym plan for you was fairly simple, a lot of tricep exercises and some upper body work that you finished off fairly quickly, within the hour you were heading back to the locker rooms, to grab your jumper and some pills before heading off to the lunch room to see what the chefs had cooked up today.

Kim, Leah, Katie, Viv, Beth and Jen were all sitting inside the rooms, the six of them hushedly talking between themselves. You did your best to ignore them, beelining straight towards your locker, throwing on your hoodie first before reaching into the pocket in your bag where you’d left the container early.

You felt around, confused for a few seconds when you didn’t immediately feel it.

You shoved your hand deep into the pocket, again your fingers touched nothing but the mesh of the inside pocket in your bag. At this stage, your hands begin to shake, you pull your hand out of the empty pocket, maybe you put them somewhere else.

You begin to rifle through your bag, searching incessantly for the one pill bottle that you need so desperately.

It’s not in your bag, three searches confirm that.

Maybe it’s fallen into your locker somewhere?

You pull out your things from the cube, searching desperately for your sweet relief.

This can’t seriously be happening, how the fuck could you have possibly lost them?

“Kid, what are you looking for?”

You ignore Beth’s question, continuing to toss your locker, even though it’s blatantly obvious that they aren’t hiding anywhere, they’re gone.

“Kid, what’s wrong?”

You pivot on your heel to address Beth, but your eyes are glued to Leah’s hands, or more so what Leah has resting in her hands.

The little orange bottle, the sacred fucking bottle.

“This whatcha looking for?”

You try your very hardest not to slip up, not to give it away too much, not when it’s very likely that whatever this is, it’s a test.

“Why have you got my pills?”

You decide to pivot with a question, it seems like the best decision.

“Why are you still on pills?”

Leah’s words are cut throat, they hit you hard.

“Because of my surgery.”

It’s an ominous answer, maybe it’ll save you from the vice captain's anger, maybe it won’t.

“You had surgery four months ago.”

Leah’s words, whilst they are a statement, hold questioning behind them.

“I don’t see how anything between my doctor and myself matters to you, he’s given me a script for medication, one that I use.”

It’s definitely the wrong thing to say, Leah looks offended, Kim looks like she’s about to kill you, Beth and Viv just look sad, Katie and Jen look like they don’t really know what to say.

“It’s not our fucking business? You should have been off pills three months ago, it’s my blood business to know when my teammates are continuing to take drugs way past the point of it being logical.”

Kim’s voice is angry, but not the kind of anger where it’s directed at you, it’s more the kind of angry where she clearly wants answers that you aren’t giving her.

“I don’t know what you want me to tell you, my doctors fill my scripts, beyond that it’s none of your business what I take and don’t take to get through sessions.”

Kim’s face scrunches up, Leah’s looks similar, it’s funny to you sometimes how similarly they captain.

“You haven’t had any complications, you should have been completely pain free months ago, why do you still need pills? Why do you need them so frequently? Don’t think that we all haven’t realised how often you are taking them, you’re going through them like a bag of candies, it’s not healthy.”

Kim’s right, it leaves you a little bit gobsmacked and takes you a little bit to recover from what she’s saying to you.

“I’m playing well, am I not? Beyond how I am playing on the pitch it’s none of your fucking business.”

When you think about it, swearing at Kim was possibly the stupidest thing you could have done, but you suppose there isn’t any coming back from it now.

“It’s not my fucking business? Beyond being your captain I give a shit about your health and mental wellbeing, so when I see one of my best mates and teammates looking like they are fucking addicted then I am allowed to ask questions, questions that you are going to answer or else we will be having a very different conversation, one that includes Jonas and the medical staff and I promise you that it will end with a very different result.”

Kim’s words hit you right in the chest, you force yourself to take a seat, looking at the six women and taking in the guilty look across both Viv, Katie, Beth and Jen’s faces.

“You guys fucking ratted on me, for nothing? I’m not fucking addicted, people who are addicted are frantic and stupid and fucking unhinged. Do you think if I had a pill addiction that I’d be able to play, do you think I’d be able to do half the things we do if I had an addiction, I just need them to get me through the day, to get me through the work outs.”

Your justification is weak, you know that, but you still believe in what you are saying, you don’t have a problem.

Kim’s face deflates, it looks like whatever she is about to say is going to be a lot more emotional and heavy then you are prepared for.

“Kid, you have a problem. How you manage to do it all baffles me, truly, you should not need pills to be getting you through the day, not when you are in recovery, not when your tricep is almost fully healed, Beth and Katie told me about it because they are genuinely worried, I am too. We’re all here for you, whatever you need.”

You shake your head, you don’t need help, you don’t need support, what you need is your fucking pills back.

“Can I have my fucking pills back?”

Leah shoves the bottle into her pocket, you know that you aren’t getting them back but it was worth a try.

“Are you fucking serious?”

It’s apparently Katie’s turn to be the bad cop.

“They fucking belong to me.”

Katie looks absolutely fuming, if it wasn’t for the whole situation you were in you would probably laugh about it.

“Not anymore they don’t, you’ve lost that fucking priviledge. This is how it’s going to go from now on. You’re going to move in with Beth and Viv for now, Lia’s searching your apartment as we speak, you’re done with pills, no more, you’re cut off. You’re going to get a fucking handle on your life and all of this shit or else you’ll be benched and sent to rehab or wherever Jonas thinks is the best place for you to sort out your fucking addiction, because that’s what this is. You can’t survive four hours without slipping some pills, that is seriously fucking concerning and all of us are so fucking worried about you. If you want to continue playing then there are going to be a whole set of rules and conditions because this can’t keep going, it’s unsafe.”

All the other women nod along with Katie’s words, you realised that you are definitely fucked.

“I’m a fucking adult, you guys have no right to be doing this to me, I don’t have a fucking problem.”

Katie rolls her eyes, standing up from her seat to walk over to you.

“Kid I am so sorry none of us realised earlier, maybe if we had it wouldn’t have been so bad, but you have to understand how bad it is, you should not be reliant on drugs that are prescribed to a person after a serious surgery, your attached. Not all addicts are frantic, you definitely aren’t, but that doesn’t change the fact that you have a problem and if you don’t stop it now, you never will. We all want to help you, however you need.”

You don’t really know what to do, everything Katie is saying hits you so hard, you can’t help but let tears fall, they’re wrong, you don’t have a problem, you need the pills, how are you supposed to be okay without them?

“Please, just give me the pills, I’ll do whatever you want, please, I need them, I’ll do anything please just give them back.”

Katie wraps you up in her arms, so tight that you worry about your ability to breathe, it makes everything stop for a few seconds, you forget about the pills, forget about how much internal pain you are struggling with.

“You know I can’t do that kid. How about we get you home? I don’t think you're in the mindset to train, Viv and Beth will leave with you, they’ll take you back to theirs whilst we finish up here for the day and then we’ll all have a chat about it later, okay?”

You pull yourself out of Katie’s arms, your face in a deep frown.

“You don’t understand, I fucking need them, I can’t live without them, what am I supposed to do without them? This is fucking crazy how am I supposed to play when you’re all forcing me to go cold turkey on the one thing that I rely on most.”

Katie’s hands move to your shoulders, planting themselves down firmly on you.

“No you don’t. It’s going to be a hard adjustment but it’s for the best. If we’re right and you are addicted, you’ll go through withdrawals, it’ll suck, but we’ll be here for you through it, we’re here to kick you in the ass but pick you up when you are hurting, we’re here for whatever you need.”

In a split second decision you lunge forward and directly at Leah, the blonde doesn’t expect it, and definitely doesn’t expect you to reach right for the pocket that you’d previously seen Leah push the pills in.

You don’t really know what your plans where for once you’d managed to obtain the bottle, but you knew one thing, you needed those pills and Leah was standing in the way of that.

Within seconds Jen and Kim’s arms were linked around yours, pulling your desperate form off of Leah.

“Please-Fuck please just give them to me, I’ll do whatever you need, please, I need them. I don’t need you guys, you guys don’t give a shit about me, I’m fine, I don’t want our help, just give me the drugs and leave me be, I’ll be fine, I’m always fine, I don’t need you guys. J-Just give me the pills and I’ll leave, I’ll never bother you guys again. ”

Kim managed to tug you completely away from Leah, whilst the older woman is significantly smaller than you, she was far stronger and you stood absolutely no chance against her.

You ragdolled in an attempt to make it harder for Kim, she replied to that by dragging your limp body up onto a seat, resting both of her hands on your soldiers just like Katie had, except for the fact that instead of Kim’s face being one of care and genuity, hers was stern and concerned.

“You don’t get to do this. You do not get to push us away because you want a fucking dose of drugs. We are family, family means so much more than some stupid object and the kid who worked her way here through the academy would have told me the exact same eight months ago. I know you have been through a lot, I know this injury has sucked, I know that you are going through a lot but you can’t push family away. We’re going to be here for you when you are at your biggest high and your lowest low, we are here through thick and thin. I can stand for you breaking down at ever minute of everyday if it means that we can help you, you can hurt us all as much as you want and we will continue to come back because whilst you might think that you are breaking us, you aren’t.”

Kim’s words just send tears running down your face and sobs coming out of your mouth.

Everything from the last hour is barreling directly at you, the realisation that maybe you aren’t as fine as you’ve been telling yourself, even if it feels wrong, you know what they are telling you makes sense, it hurts way more admitting that to yourself though.

Kim removes her arms from your shoulders, reaching for your torso and bringing you into another big hug, it’s suffocatingly painful and you swear that your skin prickles with the contact.

“I’m sorry, fuck, I’m sorry.”

You don’t know what you are sorry for, which probably makes the apology pointless, but it feels like it needs to be said, like you need to make some kind of attempt to recognise your wrongdoing.

“It’s okay kid, we’ve got you, it’s going to be okay, we’re all here for you, let’s get you back to Beth’s, hmm? I think you could do with a good nap and a proper feed. You’ve been working yourself to the bone, it’s time to let yourself rest. Take it from me, this whole routine you have for yourself, the over working, the pills, it’s only so long before you completely burn yourself out and trust a woman who’s been there, that is the last possible thing you could want, especially considering you are so young.”

Kim’s opinion and words are gospel to you, being another midfielder ever since you’d become a part of the arsenal senior team you hung onto every single word that she spoke, so having the Kim Little calling you family, it was something else completely.

“Please, just take me home.”

Kim nods, pulling back from you to reach into your locker to grab your bag before handing it over to Beth who gives you a little smile, it doesn’t quite reach her eyes though, that’s how you know that whatever is happening, it’s not good at all.

You try your hardest to wipe away the tears with the sleeve of your hoodie, but it’s a losing battle, the salty liquid continuing to flow freely down your cheeks.

Viv replaces Kim, her arm flinging itself over your shoulders and shielding you from the outside world.

Without much fuss the couple pulls you out of the locker rooms and as quickly as they can towards the car park and back to the same car you’d arrived in this morning, this time though it’s so much harder, it feels nearly impossible, especially knowing that instead of the normal routine that entails the couple dropping you back to your apartment, this time you are going back to theirs.

Normally, you’re very happy to participate in a dinner or game night with the duet, but you know what going back to Viv and Beth’s means, it means accountability, change, pain, things you aren’t really sure if you’re ready for.

Viv makes the decision to slide into the back seat with you, a constant comfort as you try to navigate exactly what has just happened.

The ride to Viv’s and Beth’s is a blur, Viv drags you out of the backseat and into the elevator, then into their apartment.

You're too lost to do much more than let Viv lead you to the couch dropping Myle into your lap, who is apparently more than happy to cuddle up under the blanket that Beth throws at you.

All you can think about is what your teammates had to say. About the nights where you’d doubled up on pills to mask the mental pain of all the pressure you were taking on of leading a midfield without Kim, about how you felt like you would cripple up and break if you went a day without your pills, about how for the last few months the highlights of your day has been the pills in the bottle instead of the people around you, about how you’ve been finding more happiness in drugs instead of the life you are living, about how your whole life revolves around pain meds which you didn’t even need anymore.

Addicted wasn’t a word you had ever used in a sentence with you and drugs before, but now, it’s all that you can think about.

Addiction.

It had never been a possibility for you, how could you be addicted? Nobody you knew had ever had problems with pills, you’d done countless injuries including pain meds and never had a problem. No injury you’d ever done had such a negative reception though, the fans were fuming, your teammates were stressed, you were pressured. You needed to recover, for the good of everybody, pain meds were the way to get through that so you’d taken them, to fix all of the problems.

That was the reasoning your brain was using, it wasn’t perfect, but it made enough sense.

Beth sat down next to you and you felt at peace enough to meet her eyes.

They were calmer than before, you felt similarly, calmer, less like you were at war with yourself.

“I was so stupid that I didn’t even realise, I thought I was doing fine, I was so fucking stupid.”

Beth takes a deep gulp of air before she says anything, it’s hard to watch somebody who you’ve come to care about so dearly look like they are struggling so heavily to communicate with you.

“You’re not stupid. It’s not your fault. A lot of people enabled this to keep happening and you couldn’t have known better, what matters most is we are here for you now, the sooner before the later.”

You nod along to Beth, bringing a asleep Myle up to your chest and clutching onto him, the puppy is so soft, a big contrast to how you feel at the moment.

“I didn’t want to let everyone down.”

Beth sighs an oh so familiar sigh, the same sigh you heard every single time someone out of the acl crew mentioned how they felt like they were a burden or a problem or like they were letting the team down.

“You could never let any of us down, not really, sure we’re all very worried about you, but shit happens, life fucking happens. Every single day we all struggle, every person on this world, life is a bitch and the worst part is that we have people holding us accountable for it every single day. Fans, social media, teammates, we don’t get a break, even when we need it the very most. As teammates, it's our job to love you no matter what anybody is saying, you are different to every single human on earth, you have different needs, you don’t have to try to be someone you aren’t, we love you best when you try not to. Do not think for a moment that you will ever disappoint us, sure we can be angry and annoyed and disappointed with your actions but never you directly. We all love you no matter what, just be whoever you need to, not who you think everyone needs you too.”

You don’t know what to say, so you chose to say silent for a few seconds, really observing what Beth has just said, the complete honesty behind her words.

“I want to do better for you guys Beth, I don’t want to be reliant on drugs that I don’t need, I just don’t know how to live without them.”

Beth nods, her eyes all glazed and watery.

“Then we’ll help you, we’ll do whatever is necessary to help you, just let us in, let us be there for you.”

401 notes · View notes

andmaybegayer · 4 months

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Every now and again someone will make the claim that "Calories In Calories Out weight loss techniques don't work" and a brain genius will round the corner waving a conservation of energy equation to tell this person that they're an idiot and I do not care for the brain geniuses here.

The brain geniuses are fundamentally misunderstanding several things, potentially willfully. Calories In Calories Out isn't a fundamental truth, it's the process of tracking estimates of energy consumption and usage and the problem is that both of those numbers are highly variable and nearly impossible to track reliably without continuous intervention.

The Calories in Calories In Calories Out process typically means "the number on the side of a bag of food" and "your basal metabolic rate plus activity energy" and importantly it is that and not the fundamental law of nature that conservation of energy is.

Metabolism is a very complicated thing to measure and, under real world conditions, the amount of energy you extract from food is extremely variable, depending on how and when you eat, the structure of your digestive system, your own hormone and enzymatic and bacterial profile, and many other things. The number on the side of a packet is a suggestion that is largely estimated empirically, not even measured by something as crude as a calorimeter, just added up from components and older estimates.

Similarly the amount of energy you burn both as a basic level and in activities depends on many things, basal metabolic rate estimates that you can do without specialized equipment and several days are extremely quick and dirty and are basically just simple thermodynamics estimates. Even if you do get your estimate spot on, the amount of energy you burn can change pretty dramatically in response to changes in diet, lifestyle, and situation. It doesn't help that the majority of many people's energy consumption is passive metabolic energy consumption and that's regulated hormonally, largely beyond your direct control or awareness.

I'm also sympathetic to this because I have completely given up on gaining weight. In my final year of high school after spending three years oscillating between 50 and 55kg my parents and I decided to try and increase my weight by eating more calories, I tripled my breakfast calorie intake, added supplementary protein, ate like 1.5× more at other meals, all while slightly decreasing my activity level because I had dropped some extracurriculars, It felt like a ridiculous effort, I often ate way more than I was comfortable eating, and a year later I had hit an incredible 59kg and was stuck there.

I now just manage my diet and activity to keep on useful muscle mass and make sure I don't go below 50kg because my bones have enough problems to deal with.

If I was trying to lose weight, did the opposite of what I did, cut my calories by 30%, for months, increased my activity by a small amount, and I lost less than 10% of my weight, I would probably also move my focus elsewhere. I'm sure the system works for some people! But it's not as simple as adding up some numbers and making sure one is bigger than the other.

#food #diet

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fredwkong · 9 months

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Hey can you help me re-experience my college days as hot college jock? Wresling, swimming, rowing, gymnastics I don't care but would love to go back and redo as a hot fit jock!

Hmm, let’s see what might be fun.

I’m not making you a wrestler. They never switch unless you can beat them on the mat. Swimmers are super top heavy. Rowers are my type, but their parties are definitely not. Gymnast… Hmm, having a gymnast around sounds pretty fun.

I’ve got it! You’re the star of the cheer squad! I’ll work my magic, and…

Welcome to your new life! Every morning, you wake up in a different football player’s room. They love your tight, flexible body, and you love how dumb and musky they are. Sometimes, you convince them to take your big jock cock by telling them it’ll give them extra protein.

You basically doze through all your classes. You let some nerds suck you off, and they basically beg to do all your academics. After some locker room “bonding” with the other boys in cheerleading, you spend all afternoon getting sweaty at cheer practice. Usually, a few dozen members of your school’s varsity men’s teams show up to watch you jump, shake, and bend.

There’s always parties to attend for a hot jock like you. Every night you dance and fuck to your heart’s content, and take and give as many loads as you like.

Don’t worry about the future. You’ve got a great career as an escort waiting for you after graduation. Before you’re thirty, you’ll know basically every major league sports star in the country.

Can I get a special rate? Just for a night?

#male transformation #mental change #answered ask #muscle tf #reality change #male tf #dumber tf #college tf #getting younger #all fwkong

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 9 months

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If you were to be roommates with any of the NRC boys, who would you wanna be roommates with? Who would you not want to be roommates with?

Ooh, what a fun prompt 😂 I’ll split them into categories and then comment on my reasoning for them! (I’m responding for myself, not for my OC by the same name confusing, I know)

Side note: I know this question was limited only to the NRC boys but for funsies I’m going to comment on Neige, the Dwarves, Chenya, and Rollo who are also students 😂 just at different schools… Let me have this—

Absolutely NOT

♥️ — I would drop kick this kid the moment he starts to mouth off to me 😤 I also don’t trust him to not pollute our shared spaces with Axe body spray. Ace is basic enough to do that.

🦈 — Not a fan of people who flake on me or act fickle. It would be a massive inconvenience if Floyd promised to do something (for example, cleaning or making dinner for us roomies) but didn’t because he suddenly “didn’t feel like it”. I’d be forced to pick up after him or to change my schedule to accommodate, and that can very easily annoy me. Plus, if his own room in the game is of any indication, he doesn’t seem very tidy… @.@

🏹 — Too extroverted. I don’t want to be greeted with his dumb ol’ smiling face or French/j when I come home every day. I’d also live in fear of him watching me sleep at night or him just reciting details about me that he shouldn’t reasonably know (clothing sizes, what I did while I was out, etc.)

👑 — Look, I don’t want to deal with paparazzi or crazy fans following Vil home or something. That’s too much stress for me to take. On top of that, there’s nothing stopping an idiot reporter from printing shady gossip about Vil’s roomie being his secret lover… which could, in turn, attract hate from his followers. Please let me just live without worrying about this.

🦇 — MAN LIVES LIKE A HOARDER 😭 There are other characters with messy rooms, but Lilia literally has tons of miscellaneous stuff everywhere... Living with him also means I have to do the bulk of the cooking or risk playing gacha with my life when Lilia's allowed to be in the kitchen. Not only that, but I'd likely be spooked by him dropping on in at random times of the day--I don't think my heart could take it. Too much trouble for me to deal with on a daily basis.

***Bonus: Neige*** — Same reasoning as Vil. I’m sure he’d be cute and peppy + help out with the chores a la Snow White, but I still don’t want to deal with the stress of living with a celebrity and having to deal with potentially super parasocial fans coming at me just for the association.

***Bonus: The Dwarves*** — … I’m not running a daycare here 🤡

I’ll tolerate them

♦️ — Cater avoids being on my shit list as long as he doesn’t start begging me to be in his selfies and twisted Tiktoks or to do internet challenges with him. I’ll tolerate him if he gives me free food he got for pics but doesn’t feel like eating because it’s not to his tastes.

🦁 — Judging from how Leona has Ruggie doing a lot of his housework 💦 I feel like I'd also have to do the bulk of the housework to make up for what Leona doesn't do... Aside from that, I think I could tolerate his personality pretty alright??? I can force him to play tabletop games with me :v and get free veggies off of his plate... (He can have my extra meat, too much protein makes me feel sick.)

☀️ — With his kind of wealth, I don’t need to worry about Kalim paying his share of the rent and for shared items (in fact, he’ll probably just buy everything for us both) 😭 but I wouldn’t like Kalim always inviting a shit ton of people over to party… Another major con is that he probably needs to be taken care of since Jamil or other servants usually fulfill his every need, and I’m NOT about that. Him paying for everything somewhat balances out these grievances, but I have pride to maintain and I don’t want to 100% live off of someone else’s money.

🍎 — Nothing overtly offensive about Epel immediately comes to mind, but if this is pre-book 5 Epel then I don’t want to deal with his toxic masculinity. I could leech free apple products off of whatever his family sends.

💀 — I just KNOW this nerd would be up gaming late until like 3 am and loudly raging as he does it, but I'm a pretty heavy sleeper so I think I could put up with it (not that I want to, only if I have to). Idia wouldn’t be that much of a bother to me during the daytime (he probably just holes up in his room anyway)... And hey, free gaming partner, tech consultant, and someone to watch anime with (and then we can argue about who the best character is).

⚡️— Sebek is punctual and loud, so he's useful to have as an alarm clock (I have a tendency to sleep in). He can do laundry, move heavy furniture, and (most importantly to me) brew tea, all things which contribute to the household. But I swear, I SWEAR, if he opens his mouth to tell me why I should like Malleus, I'm going to move out ASAP.

***Bonus: Chenya*** — Chenya definitely feels like the kind of roomie that eats the food you left in the fridge and then claims he has no idea where it went (while there are incriminating crumbs around his mouth). His UM also has potential to make me feel uneasy in the same space (like… he could be anywhere x.x). The only reason I’ll tolerate rooming with Chenya is because he’s a cute cat boy.

Acceptable

🌹 — Riddle’s just... okay. I can see myself getting irritated whenever he's being a stickler about certain rules being followed or things having to be done a certain way (since I hate being told what to do). Then again, I'm also a stickler for certain things (like no outdoor shoes inside the house; always wear house slippers instead). If we can compromise and avoid shouting (assuming this is post-book 1 Riddle), that would be great. If it’s book 1 Riddle… yeah, I’m tiptoeing around him and/or he gets lowered into “Absolutely NOT”.

♠️ — Nothing that notable about Deuce or how he lives, he’s just not a very strong contender for what I’d like in a roommate. Phone calls to his mom aren't so long or so frequent that they'd be an annoyance.

🐙 — Pro: Azul does all the math for us when it comes to the bills. Saves me a lot of hassle. Con: he’ll ask for compensation for every little thing he does. It balances out, I guess.

🐬 — As much as I'd love to have a live-in butler, I don't trust Jade for one second to not be plotting something behind my back. Sure, he's polite and does all the usual malewife things, but I never know when this man has slipped a new breed of mushrooms into dinner to test the effects of its consumption on me (BRO DID THIS DURING MASTERCHEF AND I'LL NEVER LIVE THAT DOWN). Jade also seems like the type of roomie to smile to your face but shit talk you when you're not around 🤡 It's fine, I'm a masochist so I'll let it happen/j

🐉 — I mean. He's acceptable as a roommate, but Malleus feels like the kind of person you rarely even see in the apartment??? And whenever he does show up, you're shocked that you've spotted him. That means I'd basically have the place to myself for most of the time, which is great for an introvert like me.

Omg pls

🐆 — Ruggie’s got tons of experience looking after Leona, I’m sure those skills will transfer over nicely to rooming with me. I guess my only concern here would be fighting with Ruggie over small savings (like maybe a spare coin or the last of the leftovers), because we’re both frugal and want to hoard whatever he can get our grubby little paws on.

🐺 — Jack keeps to himself and wouldn’t bother me 😌 Good boy!!

💤 — He’s quiet when he’s awake and/or half asleep (and honestly, what a mood). Silver would be such a peaceful roomie… plus, all his woodland creature friends basically provide free animal therapy. Since Lilia often left Silver home alone while he embarked on worldly travels, Silver’s already got experience in homemaking and a willingness to pitch in.

🐱 — Grim is this high up only because he is cat-shaped and therefore he is basically a Real Cat. He is my pet now. I will feed him and bathe him and take good care of him. If he shreds the furniture or sets it on fire though, he’s being put in time out.

***Bonus: Rollo*** — Listen, think of the entertainment value of this 😳 Rollo would be that roommate that looks very collected and unassuming, but every so often goes on these outrageous rants once his anger is stockpiled and he can’t contain it anymore. I’d sit there listening to him go off about how magic is evil, how we’d all be happier without it, etc. And like… while I don’t necessarily agree with his rhetoric, the complete character shift to being unfiltered and unhinged is just so fascinating to observe. (… Oh yeah, and Rollo would be pretty good at cleaning since NBC students as fastidious about that kind of thing.)

You’re my new best friend

♣️ — If you give me free food then I will love you forever and ever. Trey gives free food. Therefore, I suddenly love Trey. Jokes aside though, I do see him as someone who has his shit together and wouldn’t stir the pot. He’d do his fair share of chores (including the cooking) and doesn’t have an abrasive personality that would make it difficult to be around him. Bonus, I can ask him for free dental hygiene advice and we can geek out about teeth together.

🐍 — Jamil has a similar domestic skillset as Jade, but the difference is that Jamil doesn’t go out of his way to deliberately cause problems or to enable others to act out. If I let him do his own thing and don’t get on his bad side, I think Jamil would be respectful to me as well. I’ll be happy to eat any of his delicious cooking 🤤 and in return, I’ll be his bug slayer—it’s a good deal!!

🤖 — It’s like having all of the household tools you need in one, plus a security system and a new little bestie 😌 I’d trust Ortho with my life 💕 We also save on the food and water bill since he doesn’t need those things to function, just electricity every so often to charge!

#twst #twisted wonderland #Octavinelle #Rollo Flamme #Rollo Flamm #Seven Dwarves #Chenya #Che'nya #Neige Leblanche #Heartslabyul #Savanaclaw #Pomefiore #Scarabia #Diasomnia #Grim #Ignihyde #disney twisted wonderland #question #notes from the writing raven

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yamameta-inc · 5 months

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Source.

[ID: A two-page infographic titled "T Cells & Covid-19: A basic introduction."

A box labeled "What are T cells?" Text reads: "T cells are one of the most valuable types of white blood cells in your immune system. They play a key role in keeping you healthy and safe from disease. They identify, attack, and destroy infectious agents (like viruses). T cells protect the body from infections that have reached the inside of your cells." To the left of the box is an image of cells.

A box labeled "Why are they called T cells?" Text reads: "T cells are born from stem cells found in your bone marrow. Once the T cells are created, they migrate to your thymus (an organ located behind your breastbone); this is why they're called T cells. They develop and grow inside your thymus. Once they're fully mature, your T cells live in your blood and lymph nodes." To the right of the box is an image of a simplified human figure. The thymus' location is shown in bright pink in the center of the chest, roughly in the middle of the collarbone.

A box labeled "Major Subtypes: Killers & Helpers." Text reads: "Your body creates several different types of T cells to keep you safe. Each of these types has a different role to play in your immune system. Two of the major subtypes are 'killer' (cytotoxic) T cells (shown at left) and 'helper' (CD4+ cells) T cells." To the left of the box is a depiction of a blue cell.

A box labeled "Killer T Cells." Text reads: "Killer T cells are nicknamed killers because they can actually kill virus-infected cells. They can also kill cancer cells--meaning they are super, super valuable. They have small signaling proteins called cytokines that they use to call for help from other cells when your body is mounting an immune response." To the right of the box is an illustration of what appears to be killer T cells fighting infected or malign cells.

A box labeled "Helper T Cells." Text reads: "Unlike the killer T cells, the helper T cells work by activating other cells in your body. By activating your body's memory B cells and your body's killer T cells, they set off an even bigger immune response within your body." To the left of the box is a depiction of a green cell.

A box labeled "What happens if you lose T cells?" Text reads: "Your body really, really needs T cells. When you don't have enough of them, your body's immune system cannot work properly, making you really susceptible to infections. And it's important to know that as we age, we don't produce many (if any) new T cells." To the right of the box is a graphic where the words "why am i always sick?" appear multiple times in different colours.

A screenshot of an article from the Tyee, titled "What If COVID Reinfections Wear Down Our Immunity?" by Andrew Nikiforuk, dating from 7 November 2022. What text is visible reads: "Dr. Anthony Leonardi is a lightning rod for debate. If he’s right, this pandemic poses a greater threat than widely assumed", followed by an image of cells. Under the image, text reads: "T cells are a body’s key line of defence against infection. COVID infections can cause them to prematurely age, harm organs and become exhausted, warns Dr. Anthony Leonardi. Image via Shutterstock."

A box labeled "Covid destroys T cells." Text reads: "Covid damages and destroys T-cells. This happens because Covid hyperstimulates T cells--it stimulates them too much. Why? Covid has the ability to linger in your body and challenge your immune system. When T cells stay activated continuously like this, they become exhausted and wear down. And the result is that your immune system gets badly damaged. Even so-called 'mild' Covid infections can really mess up your immune system. Even people without serious Covid symptoms showed T cell exhaustion in a recent study. 'Exhausted' T cells are those that lose their ability to fight off viruses (and their ability to fight off cancer.) Hyperactivated T cells can also lead to organ damage, leading to serious health issues. In short, Covid is damaging our immune systems."

/end ID]

To read more on this topic:

How the Coronavirus Short-Circuits the Immune System (26 Jun, 2020)

Dendritic cell deficiencies persist seven months after SARS-CoV-2 infection (21 Jul, 2021)

SARS-CoV-2 Actively Infects And Kills Lymphoid Cells (14 Apr, 2022)

In Cleveland and beyond researchers begin to unravel the mystery of long COVID-19 (22 Oct, 2022)

What if COVID Reinfections Wear Down Our Immunity? (7 Nov, 2022)

Single-cell multiomics revealed the dynamics of antigen presentation, immune response and T cell activation in the COVID-19 positive and recovered individuals (2 Dec, 2022)

SARS-CoV-2 infection weakens immune-cell response to vaccination: NIH-funded study suggests need to boost CD8+ T cell response after infection. (20 Mar, 2023)

Lymphocytopenia: Merck Manual (Revised Apr 2023)

Long COVID manifests with T cell dysregulation, inflammation and an uncoordinated adaptive immune response to SARS-CoV-2 (11 Jan, 2024)

#covid #immunology

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minastras · 1 year

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prev • masterlist • next

10: slow down, romeo

words: 1.9k

warnings: swearing

——————————

Taehyun made himself comfortable on the sofa, propped his laptop up on his knees, and checked for the third time that his webcam was off. He couldn’t believe he ever thought he could do this on his own.

He felt like your almost-kiss that night the surge protector blew had been a sign that you liked him back, but the second your friend Soobin walked through the door he started to doubt that.

You’d taken the time to introduce him, which was a courtesy Taehyun didn’t expect people like you to extend to people like him before he met you. His disappointment kicked right back in when you and Soobin headed straight for your bedroom.

He swiftly gave up on the paper he was writing and moved to the kitchen, meal prepping for the rest of the week. You made fun of him for that frequently, for his bland meals of chicken breast and broccoli and protein supplements. If this was what having feelings was like, he’d rather not have them at all.

That was where he was when Soobin left. You walked your friend to the door, hugged him goodbye, and he whispered something into your ear. Taehyun set his knife down on the chopping board and texted the love whisperer.

That’s how he got here — caught red-handed when you walked out of your room with your phone pressed to your ear. When you started talking, asking can you hear me okay?, your voice began coming out of his laptop speakers.

He left the Zoom meeting as quickly as humanly possible and slammed his laptop shut hard enough to damage it, but it was too late. You were the fucking love whisperer. That somehow made total and no sense at the same time.

As his world crumbled around him he sat rigidly on the sofa, for the first time in his life completely lost as to what to do. You sat down next to him and called his name, but he kept his face buried in his hands, refusing to look at you.

“God. Fuck,” he muttered, bouncing his leg so vigorously the entire sofa shook. You knew, of course you did. You knew he liked you. “How did you not figure out it was me? I said such specific things,” he wondered aloud, lost in thought.

“Because you’re the last person I would expect to text the love whisperer? You hate love,” you replied, defensive. “I mean, I did know. But I- it’s complicated.”

He took that to mean you were so repulsed by the thought of him liking you that you couldn’t bear to entertain it for even a moment. Neither could he.

“Why would you do that for free? Where’s the ROI?” he asked, changing the topic. The heater was broken as usual, but he felt unbearably warm.

“That’s your next question?” you said, incredulous, throwing your head back and laughing. He swore he had never believed in magic until he heard you laugh. “You’re such a business major. Love is the ultimate return on investment.”

“Ew. Gross. Fuck love,” he answered, wrinkling his nose and not meaning any of it.

“So you don’t love me?” you asked, shoulders falling, voice softening, eyes turning down at the corners.

“No, of course not. I’ve known you for two months.”

Why did you give a fuck if he loved you or not? For you, he was just your weird loner roommate who’d poured his heart and soul out to you without knowing it. You, who had most of the student body wrapped around their finger, cared about what he thought of you. A nobody.

He scoffed, deflecting yet again, hoping you wouldn’t steer the conversation back to him basically admitting outright he had feelings for you. “What’s so great about love, anyway?”

Whether you were just mercifully humouring his diversions because you could see how embarrassed he was or you had genuinely forgotten what led you into this situation, he wasn’t sure. But either way, you dropped the love whisperer thing.

“It’s so hard to get just right,” you answered. “It’s rare enough to love someone, let alone have them love you back at the same time. The sheer improbability of love is what makes it special when two people come together and build something beautiful out of it,” you said wistfully.

It must be nice to think like that, he mused. Your eyes seemed to sparkle as you spoke, and he was transfixed.

“Look, Soobin likes Chungmi, Chungmi likes Yeonjun, Yeonjun likes me, or so he says, I like-” you cut yourself off, and his heart sank.

It was Soobin, it had to be.

You continued, “Anyway, my point is that love is a fucked up food chain. So when it does work, it-”

He couldn’t take it anymore.

“What about you?” he blurted out, interrupting you.

“What about me?” you echoed, confused.

It was so embarrassing to want.

“The food chain. I have feelings for you,” he declared. “Do you have feelings for someone else?”

You already knew that, but to lay all his cards on the table so openly was another round of humiliation. From how hard his heart was beating he could understand why he usually chose to avoid torturous shit like this.

He couldn’t deliver grand romantic declarations of his undying affection for you, the types of confessions you swooned over in your black and white films. He wasn’t good with words. He couldn’t give you what you wanted apart from hope you were good at reading eyes.

“I do have feelings for someone,” you answered after a short silence, holding his gaze. You usually didn’t; you were much flightier than he was.

“Oh. Alright.” He nodded, holding back a sigh. He should have expected that, but his heart collapsed in on itself anyway. When he next spoke, he sounded disinterested again. “Well, good talk.”

You reached out and put your hand on his forearm to stop him as he stood up, ready to crawl back to his room and never leave. Just that simple touch made him nervous all over again.

“Don’t you want to know who it is?” you pushed.

Why would he? To listen to you go on and on about the person you liked after he’d been exposed and rejected in all but name? But he did sit back down.

“Not particularly-”

It was your turn to interrupt him. The kiss was so quick. Your lips were on his for less than a second, not even enough time for him to close his eyes. Or register what had happened. He stared at you, eyes wide and unblinking, frozen in shock.

“What-”

“It’s you, Taehyun,” you smiled, now seeming slightly bashful. “I like you.”

His eyes widened even more, which he didn’t think was possible. This had to be a bit, surely.

“Say it again,” he said, dazed, reaching for your hand.

“Kang Taehyun, I like you,” you repeated, enunciating each word with the utmost care.

He grinned, feeling like his entire body had come alive as he cupped your face and held you close. Time stopped as he kissed you and you folded instantly under his touch, your lips moving with his so naturally it was as if you’d kissed him dozens of times before.

“Can I tell you a secret?” you mumbled against his mouth, playing with his hair. He preened at the sensation, breaking the kiss to give you his full attention. “You were my favourite client.”

“Really?” he asked, feeling the blush return to his cheeks. God, he couldn’t believe he’d said all of those things to you.

“Yeah. I fell for you twice, you know? Once as Kang Taehyun and once as TH,” you told him, smiling. “The way you talked about your crush was so sweet, and you were so loving.”

It was you; you were the one you’d made him act and feel that way. Only you.

“How bad were your other clients?” he joked, diffusing the emotional weight of the moment. But even as he was trying to lighten the mood he was holding onto your hand tightly and brushing his thumb over your cheek, staring into your eyes. He could look at you forever.

“You’d be surprised. A lot of them were terrible,” you answered. “Talking about their crushes like objects, trying to break up relationships, telling me all their sexual fetishes completely unprompted-”

He laughed. “Maybe stop worrying about everyone else’s love lives for a second, yeah? Just focus on me.”

He kissed you again, deeper this time, feeling you smile against his lips as you wrapped your arms around his neck.

“Slow down, Romeo. When did you get so suave?” you said when you pulled apart.

“I learnt from the best.”

——————————

Sitting on the sofa with your boyfriend Kang Taehyun was infinitely better than sitting on the sofa with your roommate Kang Taehyun. You were half-lying on his chest with his arm wrapped around your shoulder and chin resting on your head, your face tucked into the crook of his neck, snuggling together under some blankets.

“Did you really think Soobin and I were dating?” you asked.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” he mumbled, a blush already blooming on his cheeks again. “Please erase my client records from your memory.”

“Then I’d forget all the sweet things you said about me!” you teased. He groaned in embarrassment and scrunched his nose. “You call yourself a cynic, but I don’t think you are. I think you secretly love love,” you continued, giggling at his flushed cheeks.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night,” he said, rolling his eyes, but you could hear the smile in his words without needing to see him.

With the warmth radiating off his body, his arm holding you tight to his chest, and the soothing vibrations of his low voice, you were fairly sure you could fall asleep right then and there.

You lifted your chin to give him a peck on his jaw, just under his ear. He shivered at that, although he tried to hide it. Cute.

“Humour me just this once, Taehyun. What does love mean to you?” you asked, laying your head back down on his chest and closing your eyes.

He adjusted his glasses and cleared his throat. “Love is eternal. It has been the strongest motivation for human actions throughout history,” he recited. “Love is stronger than life. It reaches beyond the dark shadow of death.”

You raised your head again, staring at him in confusion. If he was annoyed by how much you were moving around, he made no indication of it.

“How do you know that?” you asked.

“Laura, 1944, directed by Otto Preminger,” he said with a proud grin. “I watched it the other day because you said you liked it.”

You could fall in love with someone in two months, you decided. But you’d keep that to yourself for now. You weren’t in a hurry or anything.

“The character who says that is the murderer,” you told him.

His face fell. “Oh. Well, I couldn’t finish it,” he admitted with a shrug.

You gasped in faux offence and sat up. “It’s critically acclaimed! How could you not finish it?”

He laughed and pulled you back into his embrace, kissing your cheek.

“Don’t need to. I’ve got the real thing right here.”

——————————

thanks for reading!

-minastras <3

#tomorrow x together #txt #txt smau #taehyun #kang taehyun #taehyun smau #txt x reader #txt fluff #taehyun x reader #taehyun fluff

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y0imiy9 · 4 months

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What would your art taste like?

Inspired by @solisflowersblog because she asked what her art would taste like and I got to cooking >:)

Explanation under the cut!

Sweet explanation:

Solisflower's art would taste like a raspberry compote custard tart with a dark chocolate crumble on top (couldn't find an image of just a crumble topping so imagine the crumble on the right is on top of the tart on the left)

(raspberry tart, chocolate crumble)

Her choice in brush colour influenced the reason why i chose raspberries. It's both sweet and sour, and has a gritty texture from the seeds. Personally, i actually don't like raspberries (texture issues), but i can appreciate the flavour when combined with other fruits or ingredients. Dark chocolate pairs extremely well with raspberries. Its rich and smooth texture beautifully balances out the tart flavours of raspberries, giving the perfect blend of flavours. Dark chocolate also represents Mizu in her artworks. Mizu has rich lore that goes deep, we've barely scratched the surface about her origin story so it felt fitting to include chocolate to describe Mizu.

A custard based tart perfectly describes Solisflower's art with the way she intentionally blocks out certain areas of her pieces with minimal details and colour. The smooth and silky texture of custard best represents this. Though you're not drawn to the custard due to it's simplicity, it holds a lot of weight as it helps deliver the other striking ingredients. This is best shown in the Akemi artwork where she intentionally uses minimal details on the hair and clothes to better direct your attention to her face and hands.

The dark chocolate crumble i mentioned best describes the crosshatching shading style she uses in majority of her art. The sketchy look adds a lot of texture and variation while also making her pieces look visually interesting and crumchy (been snacking on crackers lately and i imagine eating victorian era mizu, as seen above). I really enjoy her use of insane details and basic blocking of shapes to best enhance the subject (mizu) in her pieces.

In conclusion, Solisflower's artworks has a perfect balance of striking and rich flavours, the sourness of raspberries and richness of dark chocolate. The added texture of silky custard and gritty dark chocolate crumble greatly enhances her pieces, with the consistent use of shading and blocking that gives an interesting variation in all her artworks.

Savoury explanation:

On the other hand, her art would taste like a nut (pecan, walnut or pistachios) and herb panko crusted salmon with a creamy lemon sauce. It took me a while to think about what kind of protein best fit Mizu since she's the main subject matter in almost all of Solisflower's artwork. Her art doesn't give off beef vibes, and chicken didn't feel right either. Her art is more delicate, though you could argue that with her style of shading it gives poultry energy, a quail maybe, but i personally think fish best describes the delicate nature of each brushstroke that is laid onto the canvas.

(pecan panko crusted salmon, panko crusted salmon)

Her use of crosshatching for shading greatly reminded me of the flaky layers of fish. The layers and delicate nature of fish represents each singular brushstroke that makes up majority of her pieces which adds lots of texture and variation in her art. The addition of a panko crust is because of the type of brush she uses which adds a lot of grain and a sketchy, almost rustic look. Fish dishes aren't complete without a sauce and a creamy lemon sauce best describes the solid areas of her pieces. It gives the perfect balance and enhances her art in a way that uplifts the important details of her artworks.

I chose simple flavours to represent Solisflower's artwork. This is because i'm more drawn to her use of texture and minimal colour that she uses in her pieces. Herb and lemon flavour combinations are a good pair that best describes her art as it enhances the flavour of fish (MIzu). In the example of the art above, her subtle use of blue adds a small but striking variation in her piece but it doesn't draw away from the subject itself, but enhances it.

In conclusion, Solisflower's art has the perfect balance of texture that i love so much. I'm such a sucker for sketchy, clean lineart art styles because the variation of line thickness and the grain of the brushes used tickles the right part of my brain. I'd eat her art up like i've been starved for several days. If her art were a restaurant i'd give her 3 Michelin stars <3.

If any artist would like me to compare their art to food, please let me know! I need to do something with my culinary degree once i get it lmfao.

#solisflowerblog #mizu #blue eye samurai #blue eye samurai fanart #what would art taste like #i like comparing art to food #i wish all fanart was edible #i wanna take the fattest bite out of the victorian era mizu fanart so bad it's not even funny

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world-of-wales · 2 months

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The Indian PM is asking for votes in the upcoming election by saying that voters shouldn't support the opposition leaders coz they eat........Non-vegetarian food.......

This isn't him relating environment problems and veganism/vegetarianism, but rather him campaigning that in a secular country only his party is the best because they follow the moral and vegetarian majority religion. Which is funny in itself since, except for North India, the rest of the Hindus in other parts consume all kinds of non vegetarian food items.

And to most people outside India, this vegetarian vs non-veg debate might seem foolish, but here it is proving to be the main election agenda now. A lot of people may think oh he's advocating for being vegetarian, that's great. But unfortunately not in this case coz his party which is filled with upper caste Hindus mostly use this argument of food choices to demonize minority communities in the country, they deny protein to poor children in the meals provided to them by the state in public schools, their supporters go and harass & have in many cases k-worded innocent people in name of 'Cow protection', force butchers who come from low income backgrounds to shut down their stores making them unable to earn even the meagre ammount that they do etc etc. So veg/non-veg in the case of Indian elections rn is so much more than just a debate on dietary choices.

So, no talks of education, health, economy, jobs etc this election season but rather cheap and completely nonsense topics during campaigning. And I wish I could call it satire, but unfortunately this is what the so-called largest democracy has come to.

This issue is just the tip of the iceberg of all the things that need to be changed in this country to take it back to where it was before this train wreck that the past decade has been and to start rebuilding it brick by brick.

The reason I'm posting this today is that, I want to request anyone who's eligible to vote in India to PLEASE GO VOTE! exercise ur right. Don't let anyone tell you that your voice doesn't matter coz it does. And it's never been more essential for you to make use of Article 326 and cast your vote. It is ur fundamental right.

I don't think there could be a more appropriate time to ask you for this, as it is the 133rd birth anniversary of Dr. Ambedkar today, the father of the Constitution. The man who fought all his life to make sure everyone in his country had democratic fundamental rights. He gave you that Constitution that protects you and your interests and rights. The tip of his pen changed the world you live in today for the better. So please don't let that the sacrifices made by him or of all those in the Constituent Assembly, of all those who came before you go to waste. They gave this country their all, so you could have all the freedoms that you do today. They gave you a constitution based on liberty, equality, fraternity, secularism, socio-economic democracy etc to protect you, the citizens. And now, as these rights slowly get encroached upon, it is more important than ever before for you to assert these rights.

Go read the election manifestos of the parties and learn about the candidates fighting elections from ur constituency. Please make an informed choice. Don't go and vote for people on the basis of religion, caste, etc. Go and vote for that person who actually talks about the on ground issues you face, who has plans to make ur life, and the society you live in better. Who promises to give you the basic rights that you deserve, someone who promises not to infringe upon the fundamental rights as enshrined in the constitution, the one who talks about creating better employment, creating a robust health system, making sure every child in this country has access to quality education, someone who wants to create a safe space for women not just out in the world but also in the private sphere, someone who promises to work towards dealing with the problems of inflation & other economic problems you face, someone who wants to work towards dealing with the vast enomic disparities that exist across the board. Someone who wants to work towards providing safeguards for the most vulnerable people and communities, etc etc.

Go on the website of the election commission, check out the dates of vote casting in your area, mark that date, wake up that morning take ur voter id card and please go push a button on the machine at the particular booth you fall under.

Don't let people tell you that you are young, you don't know what you need, you shouldn't be jumping into political discourse, don't let them discourage you from exercising the most important right the constitution has given you. TRUST ME, YOU DO KNOW WHAT YOU NEED, POLITICS AFFECTS YOU TOO, THE GOVERNMENT POLICIES AFFECT YOU TOO, SO YOUR VOICE IS JUST AS IMPORTANT IN THESE UPCOMING ELECTIONS AS THAT OF THE OTHERS!

YOUR VOTE MATTERS. IT'S NEVER MATTERED MORE!

#psa

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melodiousmonsters · 10 months

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"Humbug (Insecta hymenoptera) average around 7ft/2.1m tall. They are lightweight monsters that travel long distances to collect the nectar and pollen from the flowering megaflora of the monster world. They are an integral species to all of the temperate to tropical environments around as they are a major pollinator of those megaflora.

To travel around faster they evolved to be able to glide on the interdimensional fabric making up the world with their unique membranous wings. It works best in humid environments, but will work anywhere. Their heightened ability to orient themselves in the multiverse helps with navigation.

They primarily feed on honey that they make. The honey making process starts with the wax that forms from glands on the bottom of their abdomens between the plates making up the abdomen. Humbugs chew this wax and then form it into hexagonal combs they secure to walls or floors of their homes. They then go out and collect nectar from plants and store it in a special variation of a holding stomach (When I make a post on basic monster anatomy I'll explain what a holding stomach is) used solely to store nectar. They then deposit the nectar from this stomach into the combs and fan off the extra water occasionally for about a month. Then they cap off the honey and store it for later consumption. Humbugs eat honey about three a month so they have plenty of time to make their food.

They don’t feed solely off of honey as commonly believed, for protein they eat pollen they brush out of their fur. They have specialized leg joints that have a special groove in the back that functions as a press. They put the pollen between this press and press it down into a solid chunk they can eat more easily than the stray powder. They eat this pollen almost every day during the flower breeding season. They will store extra for times when flowers aren’t producing pollen.

Contrary to popular belief they aren’t that venomous, at most their sting will cause mild irritation unless you are allergic to it. What they are is highly poisonous, which isn’t a worry to you as you aren’t going to be eating one of these fellows. They have their bright banded coloring as a warning sign, and their distinctive sound spells out danger for any potential predators before they try to eat the Humbug.

(Just a quick reminder that these are written by a Bowgart character I made) Fly Humbugs are native to earth island and have a reddish tint to them, two pairs of arms, compound eyes, and a different mouth. They evolved their unique mouth to lap up fluids rather than drinking them. And instead of the sweet syrups the common counterpart consumes, fly Humbugs consume carrion and rotting plant fluids. Quite rancid stuff, but you can’t yuck someone else's yum, as a Bowgart other monsters often think it’s gross that I eat frogs and I find that quite annoying.

The reason they evolved their drab coloring is unknown, as they are highly venomous and don’t have a reason not to stand out. Speaking of venom, their venom is not only a major blood clotting agent it’s also acidic and can dissolve things unlike the common’s very mild sting.

Snouted Humbugs have blue stripes, have beaked faces, two pairs of arms, and have a bunch of balancing organs to orient themselves while traveling through dimensions. They completely lack stingers or venom so instead they amped up their toxicity and developed bright colors that stand out anywhere to warn creatures that may try and eat them.

They eat plant fluids that they suck up with their beaks. They prefer fruit fluids but most plants don’t want all the energy they put into producing fruits to attract creatures to their flowers so they kept evolving tougher skins to keep the humbugs out. But the humbugs keep evolving sharper beaks in a never ending evolutionary arms race. Though some plants took the more productive route and evolved to drop pollen on whatever eats their fruits rather than relying on things getting their faces close enough to the stamens like other flowers.(Monster digestion works differently than ours so fruits serve a different purpose in the monster world)

Humbugs live in warm, preferably damp environments, most of them live in the poison affected parts of the pocket dimension and the overgrown caverns in earth island. They construct their homes with materials around them and use their wax as an adhesive to stick things together. Because of their natural inclination to build homes they make excellent carpenters. When a large group of Humbugs get together they will often use the larger amount of wax to create wax-based hives for them to all live in.

Humbug eggs hatch in similarly warm and wet environments as their adult counterparts. Humbug undergo complete metamorphosis and have two larval and a nymph stage of life. They start out as a very basic, three-segmented larva, no limbs, only nubs of what develop to be their fingers. Then they molt into the toddler larva after about five years, which have simple fleshy nubs, the upper two sport those aforementioned fingers. Then once they reach about 10-12 they enter their teenage nymph phase where they just look like less fluffy wingless adults. Slowly they grow in fur after a few molts and once they reach 30 they grow their wings.

#my singing monsters #art #beezleart #melodious monster chronicles #humbug

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elhopper1sm · 6 months

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Jopper x GN! Reader

Content warning: Large age gap (early twenties reader),mentions of food , eating, and substance usage. Reader has parental trauma.

Sleeping was always a hassle. Hopper managed to get enough money to get a large enough second bed to hold the three of you comfortably

Joyce was a major insomniac. Trying to get her to sleep at night was awful. She'd wake up in a cold sweat and be terrified. She didn't like disturbing anyone. So she'd usually stay in the bathroom or living room reading or playing crossword puzzles to keep herself occupied and not disturb anyone

Hopper always had a beer before sleeping. You could hear him snore as you slept on his chest drifting asleep slowly as you listened to the sound of your heart beat

Hopper always needed a large breakfast before work. You didn't know how to cook very well so you'd ask Joyce for help and she'd reassure you when you were feeling needy or insecure about not knowing what to do. She only had coffee for breakfast but you constantly told her she needed to eat more.

"I'm fine. I just need the coffee for work" She'd constantly but you'd get worried

Putting your clothes to dry in a separate room so they don't smell like cigarette smoke. It was an insecurity of yours

Hating being yelled at. Absolutely terrified you. Hopper was slightly more insensitive about it. But he got more aware as time went on.

Joyce was more mindful of your fear of having someone older yell at you. She'd hand you a stuffed animal and then let you rock yourself back and forth without thinking it was weird

They drank quite a bit. You spent a considerable amount of money on alcohol. You all tried to be mindful of how much you drank. But it was a serious problem for Joyce and Hopper

Reading with Joyce. It was the best feeling in the world. She was so sweet and she'd stroke your hair as she held you in her arms

Watching TV with Hopper was nice he'd tell the weirdest jokes and complain about everything humanly possible.

Fixing cars with Hopper and doing home repairs. He taught you everything he knows about home repairs and Joyce always made you bring a first aid kit in case you got injured

They both absolutely need to greet you before and after work and get frustrated when you don't.

Learning how to make special protein waffles for El so she can get as many nutrients as she can from her diet of Eggos and milk.

Will absolutely adore you. Mostly because you're not intimidating and demanding. You don't act like you have complete authority over him.

Jonathan takes forever to warms up to you but after a while. Seeing how absolutely smitten with you he warms up to and he being around his age really makes him like you more you understand hes a teenager and he needs spce you don't pressure anything out of him.

Finding out El has superpowers freaks the fuck out of you. But also scares you because what it means for her the constant worry she might be taken advantage of. You keep a shotgun on you at all times that Hopper taught you how to use

Hopper taking you to the shooting range is one hell of an experience. He has you keep a handgun on you at all times

Joyce and you team up with El and Will to convince which basically means beg Hopper to let the family get a cat. You both succeed

Turning down Joyce's puppy dog eyes is basically impossible.

#stranger things #jim hopper headcanons #joyce x hopper #jopper #jim hopper x reader #joyce byers x reader #jopper x reader #polyamory #poly x reader #throuple #stranger things x y/n

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oldnewhaven · 1 month

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Types of Food each corporation would distribute– A post I started writing at 1:23AM yesterday while Hungry, Part 1 [?].

DAHL

- Dahl is all about Militaristic Seriousness to comical degrees, so it shouldn't surprise you that most of what they have to offer is Rations. Canned food, nutrition packets and weird astronaut looking pastes, all packaged up in neat browns and greens to match with the very boring aesthetic of the Rest of their products. Everything is neatly separated and easily accessible in Dahl settlements. One bonus of it is that it never expires, so if you're hungry and need a snack, just find an old military base and that should have you pretty much covered for a few weeks.

- "But Magnus, what's in the packs?" I hear you ask, and not to worry my situational friend, I've done Way Too Much research on this and can absolutely tell you ! Again, its all very shelf stable and nutritional, so it ranges from cereal bars, dried up meats and nuts, protein powders and pastes (usually peanut butter), some mildly flavoured crackers, a variety of canned foods (including but not limited to: "Spaghetti", """beans""", soups and veggies. These are meant to be complimentary, not really eaten on their own), and ready-made "pop it in a fire for a few seconds" sustenance providers like curries. It's good enough to eat ! Hopefully.

- ...It does Not. Taste like the best thing in the world usually. If you're desperate enough you won't notice it at first, but these things are meant for soldiers who haven't dreamed of a non-dehydrated vegetable in 10 years, so it's tough to swallow once you're not suffering from all the malnutrition ailments. It's very barely seasoned to account for the vast majority, and it's probably not a good investment to waste spices on any of it either. You could still reasonably throw a meal together with the pastes plus the canned stuff and (if you get lucky) have a chocolate cake for dessert though, even if it does taste like a biting an old boot.

TEDIORE

- Tediore is, by all lore definitions, a 'budgetarian' company. They appeal HARD to the aesthetic of the common person, and that their main demographic are consumers who are just looking for something quick and reliable, knowing people will more often than not only use it because they have no other choice, so it shouldn't surprise you that their business model for selling food is basically the same as Walmart's. In my mind they mostly sell quick snack food you'd usually see in a convenience store– Likely not the best choice as far as nutritional value goes, but it's tasty, affordable and it hits the spot when you're in a pinch or when you're starving after a long day of Torment Nexus'ing around the six galaxies. so you really can't afford to be picky most of the time. Sometimes Pretty Literally.

- The food itself is, again, just about everything you'd find in a convenience store in the middle of nowhere after a long roadtrip and are so hungry you can't see straight: Isles upon isles of chips, cereals and cookies, pre-made lunchable type meals in refrigerated containers, soda that is Technically brand name, but is still so obscure you have to look up if its even real later. It's the perfect combination of accessible, cheap and edible enough to grab the attention of people. The packaging in general tends to vary between shades of gray plus some extra shines to be recognized as food and not bagged motor oil, plus varied mascots to differ each product from one another as though they're from separate entities and not just Tediore All Over Again.

- How does it taste though ? Well, the answer is that it's good, even though it probably Will give you either a headache or a stomachache later. Like all hyperprocessed food, Tediore knows that the secret to making stuff taste good is to just either put a Lot of Salt or a Lot of Sugar in it, and that's really the whole secret. Let's say you get a nice Cheese Flavour snack bag from the local bodega: You eat 5 chips and think "Oh, that's really good!", completely oblivious to the fact you will regret this decision, and eventually eat the whole bag. Hard cut to you on the couch sluggish and weird, unsure to what caused it, but it was 100% the amount of sodium you consumed just being so high your body thinks you're sick. Or something like that. I'm not speaking from experience here.

MALIWAN

- Now, let's get this out of the way: Maliwan is as much a corporation as it is a cult. Its corporate identity as "hip" and cool and sleek and transhumanist and beautiful is all a facade for what they're really trying to sell you, which is an insecurity they can profit off of. They approach people who are already very lost, exhausted and burdened by the world and promise them a place to belong, to become something More, and if they need to manufacture your burdens, they will. All of this is to say, they're social media influencers creating problems you didn't know existed so they can sell you More Things, so obviously they're the "organic"/diet product food sellers of this world. They're like if an MLM had WAY too much credibility and power and people just had to live with it.

- You know the kinds of products I'm talking about. It's stuff that comes bragging about how it's "from the farm to your door!" even though it has gone through the same industrialization as everything else that is mass produced and meant to be sold. It's your diet versions of products, yogurts and teas and protein milks and "healthy" snacks, despite the fact they're the same composition-wide and just marked Way Up. They'd probably sell a lot of very niche products too though, all with the same promises for health benefits and what have you, but that at least have the decency to be interesting or *a little* flavorful. For one I think Maliwan branded gum would be really good, and they'd probably make some really good flavour blocks for putting in soup and stuff. That's their forté to me.

- Most of the food just tastes really bland and has kind of a chemical aftertaste, and the textures tend to vary between "Really airy and light, kind of like a foam or shaving cream" to "Unbearable combination of crunchy and soft that makes you confused on what you're even supposed to be tasting". It's a very high chance to be hit or miss depending on what you try, and since it's so expensive it's usually not worth it unless you're using these products for really specific dietary goals.

HYPERION

- Hyperion to me is complicated to say on what they'd offer as far as food goes. On the cafeteria area in TPS you only really see fast food, so I imagine that the conglomerate would own most of a food court in your average shopping mall. All the name brands are owned by Hyperion and your variety is manufactured to look like you're spoiled for all the choices when, really, you're just going to give them money either way. The food is all pretty consistently good, even though the sourcing for it is questionable and it's always plated the same everytime, which makes you think all the ingredients just go through moulds before they plop it into your plate, and it's probably the closest thing it'll get to something like homemade food from the corporations.

- Again, variety is their main selling point, so as far as food goes, you'll find a little bit of everything. Pizza, hamburgers, hotdogs, food that's been genetically modified or has poison in it, tacos– really, the world is your oyster ! They probably have that on the menu too if you look ! Its all about the flashiness and the exclusivety and the way its presented and sold that really gets peoples gears turning. They're not bound just by ONE thing, they have ALL the things you could possibly ask for right here !

- ...But does it taste good ? Ehhh, that's more of a complicated issue. Again, because of all the variety and the way everything is synthesized and made based on the standards for the company, it'll always just taste Good (as in, You bite into it and say "Yeah, that's pretty good"), and after a while of eating Just Good food, you'll already have built a tolerance to it and it'll just taste mid after a while... and that is when they start advertising to you Bigger and Better foods, stuff that's been made in a lab to taste as good to human beings as possible, something so unbelievable your tastebuds might explode ! And then they do. Because it was an experiment and they were using you as a guinea pig. But hey, all in the name of progress, right ?

#Borderlands #Headcanons #My headcanons #txt #[ my hungry ass could never be in borderlands 🤣😂🤣😂 ]#[ Sounds of the wasteland ]

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