#logical behaviourism

[somuchbetterthanthat]

Here's a little thing that's turning into my head after the latest episode.

Gwen has clearly been rattled by Mr. Bonzo and this casement obviously didn't help. And you can feel she wants to talk about it to someone, but she can't go to her Posh Friends she already feels "meh" about seeing because it throws back at her what she assumes to be her failures to progress As She Should in the Capitalist world, because well, they'll assume she's lost it, and she'll lost the last of her credibility.

She can't really go to Lena either, because although Lena is well-aware of everything that's going on, actually, and might have, in another world, be a mentor of sort to help her go through the process of the ugly shit they're doing (still rooting for that in the long term ngl), Gwen absolutely won't show any proper weakness or vulnerability in front of Lena -- I think what we saw of last episode is the most she'll allow herself to be. Being demanding and angry rather than, y'know, have the good cry she clearly wanted to have. Lena is still her superior; she doesn't respect her (yet, i suspect) but she's spent the last few years being openly antagonistic and unashamedly ambitious at her -- Gwen's pride can't let her go "nevermind, actually, you were right" about all of it.

Colin is off the grid, Sam and Celia are the newest babies and, possibly, from Gwen's point of view, not reliable in that they might leave soon (and also having a romance affair, though if Gwen is even just a little bit as jon-coded as she seriously appears to be rn, she has NOT realized at all) so of course, of course, that leaves Alice.

Alice might be infuriating and vexing and an horrible coworker, in her mind, but she's also the one who's been here longest, longer than Gwen. She's a form of stability for Gwen, at this point, and from what we heard in the early episodes of the show, they can, on occasion, actually discuss serious work-related topics that might affect them both. On top of that, Alice asks. Alice, however minimal the effort is, seems to care. Which Gwen seems to be in serious need of, if the coffee-scene was any indication.

So of course she tries to talk to Alice about it. Who else is there?

#Gwen truly FEELS more and more Jon-coded #i know none of them perfectly /fit/ which is logical coz they're new other characters #but Gwen definitely took Jon's autism-coded Sims behaviours thats for sure #also his loneliness due to natural prickliness with other people #the magnus protocol #anyway i might be obsessed with sam and alice but i'm not forgetting gwen i'm really not #tmagp spoilers

[anglerflsh]

"who's the red and who is the blue in the ship" who is the electrical field and who is the magnetic field and who inducted who first.

#[.txt] #I like physics I love memorising physics laws it's so much fun #math is stupid only because they have Theorems and not Laws. Had they made laws for math I'd like it more #I just think. Rules for physics are great. Things Work This Way and that's all they do. They Work That Way. lovely. #you dont even need to think about it because it's just so logical. It works This Way because of course it does! No other way it could work! #they should make physics laws for human behaviour

[steakout-05]

autistic coded men who have orange cats my beloved

#star trek tng #star trek #star trek data #garfield #garfield jon #jon arbuckle #jetpack joyride #professor brains #jetpack joyride 2 #this is my type. weird silly or otherwise quirky guys who have orange cats #brains being autistic is more just a headcanon i have rather than deliberate coding #but he's been shown to have a few autism-like behaviours and traits across the shorts and jetpack joyride 2 #it's kinda stereotypical but he's more of a logical simple thinker and he finds strings of numbers to be easier to remember than names #which i find to be interesting! he just has different thinking patterns from what i've seen in neurotypicals. and it's like. #it's the autism radar. i can always tell when a fictional character seems to be Not Neurotypical because holy shit they act like me- #-or another autistic person i know! #also all these characters are like. different facets of autism and i think that's so interesting #on the left we have highly logical direct and ''idk what to do with my face or my hands help'' sherlock spin autism #and then there's slightly unhinged dorky possible ADHD combo and complete lack of social skills autism #and finally there's the evil autism #and i love all three of them <3 #i just realised they're also all sitting in big comfy chairs! #jon's armchair looks so comfy though. like i really wanna sit in there #it's probably slightly dirty and most definitely scratched up by garfield but my god that's what make it more homely and comfy #i wonder how many armchairs jon has gotten over the years. i should count all the instances of him having a differently coloured armchair #anyway yeah. autistic cat dads my beloved <3

[urgrossdaughter]

I used to be so scared to express my frustration 😭 like if i got half of these asks last summer on my old blog i wouldve responded like so spinelessly. Now im like "you are annoying" and it doesn't kill me inside

#my logic was #what if theyre at a vulnerable place and it rly upsets them to be confronted #but like..u cant know that and it doesn't rly excuse shitty behaviour? esp to a stranger #uts probs cus once a guy on here got rly msd at me for having shitty replies and said he tried to khs and was in hospital 🧍‍♀️ #i knew he was lying kind of? but was also v naive #so i felt v bad #but like NO DONT

[thebirdandhersong]

:'))))))

#darn darn darn DARN. like!! tears in my eyes!!! #do you ever want to ask someone so hilariously clueless #like. sir. have you ever been in love. like. have you??? do you know what it is??? to be fond of someone?????? WHAT IS GOING ON IN YOUR MIN #anyway FIRST boy i've been able to converse with about dickens and tolstoy and dostoevsky and theology comfortably and for WHAT #APPARENTLY my brain jumped immediately to fondness rather than friendship. FOR WHAT! #anyway that's on me for clown behaviour and general silliness #pray for me lolllllll i am literally so so sick of this!! i too would like to live life without the weight of this!! #i've had 'i'll come back to you' and 'i don't want you to be alone' going round and round my head for the whole week. #like. my dude you have someone waiting for YOU back home what are you TALKING ABOUT #a note from the logical side of my brain: girl you don't even agree theologically with major points also he doesn't want to have a family o #be a father. and you knew that before he casually mentioned he was seeing someone. like. clearly it wasn't going to work anyway. let it go #but alas it is SO so horribly easy for me to grow fond of a person it is SO so horribly hard to claw my way out of that #i do not want this!!!! i do not want silly feelings!!! what's more i do not want complicated emotions because he IS my friend!!!! #it wouldn't bother me so much if this weren't like the tenth time i've had #some form of hope and reality hit it over the head with a two by four!!!!

[fluffykitteninabox]

me at 15 reading about ocd on the internet: oh that sounds like a nightmare I don't think I could live like that, so glad I definitely don't have it

me getting diagnosed 7 years later:

#in my defence it feels nothing like the stereotypes portrayed on tv #like I had a school friend who was obsessed with the show monk #I've never actually seen it so idk if it does a good job portraying it or not but I know monk is the very stereotypical ocd character #and that friend would go on and on about the show and how relatable it felt to her #not sure if she also had undiagnosed ocd but she only used a certain type of pen #and would refuse to use any other to write #she even got me into it I bought them and we would share #they were nice pens #and she also had this little ritual where if you touched her neck you had to close your fingers #in a way that mimics that stereotype for Italian hand gestures #and then you had to huff on them #she literally would not let you do anything else after you touched her neck unless you finished that little ritual #and I never thought I had anything like that so that meant I didn't have ocd right? #but yeah now that I'm saying it it seems stupid #like just because I'm not a “neat person” and don't obsess over cleaning doesn't mean anything #I say I don't obsess over cleaning and then I proceed to disinfect everything I bring from outside into the house with rubbing alcohol #but that only happened after the pandemic so I'm often thinking if it really counts #do I really have ocd or am I just traumatised from the pandemic? #like if I know the when and how I started a specific behaviour then is it really part of a mental disorder? #I know the logic behind it so it's not really a problem #right? #can I tag this as ocd? am I allowed? #fuck it! #ocd #I'm sure people who know more about this than me can explain if it counts or not #maybe it doesn't #maybe it's just germophobia? #but then what would all the other stuff be? #checking to see if your relatives are still breathing in their sleep in the middle of the night isn't germophobia #but I know the cause of this too it's from losing my uncle does that mean it also doesn't count? is it considered traumatic? idk

[gameofthronedd]

Daemyra: Archaic Vs Contemporary, Bias and Double-Standards

One thing that really ruffles my feathers in regards to support of Daemyra... is being all "Well, in medieval times..." but not applying that same logic to other aspects of the show and characters.

In the Daemyra situation, it's the logic of "no, he isn't a gr***er because at the time Rhaenyra is eligible for marriage and is a 'woman grown'". But there's a completely different attitude involved when it comes to the situation with Rhaenyra's bastards and premarital sex.

Warnings for: mentions of gr**ming minus the asterisks for brevity/accessibility/readability etc., long post, cursing/strong language

If we're using period/universe accurate logic, then, yes, perhaps Daemon's relationship with Rhaenyra isn't strange and it certainly isn't uncommon (see: Viserys and Aemma, Rhaenys and Corlys). However, I think that if you're using in-universe logic then you can't really maintain integrity whilst losing your shit when someone points out that Rhaenyra's actions are politically problematic and, daresay, inappropriate (using in-universe logic, of course!).

Based on contemporary morals, we know that premarital sex isn't inherently bad (except in the eyes of some religions, for example) and that having bastards is not a bad thing (obviously may be an issue for the aforementioned). We know that women can be sexual beings and find pleasure in that, that agency and autonomy are important for women just as it is for men. So on, so forth.

But with contemporary morals, we also know that Daemon's relationship with Rhaenyra when she is young is inappropriate. In the first episode, she is 14/15 and is involved in what may amount to grooming (such as gift-giving as seen via the necklace which is specifically crafted for her). We also see that Daemon provides and fulfills her desires for freedom and adventure, and he does pose as this "untouchable bad boy" figure.

When she's about 18 in Episode 4, Daemon takes her to the brothel and allows her to explore sexuality... before abandoning her and leaving her exposed, and consequently compromising her integrity. Whilst she is the "acceptable" age here, by contemporary morals I'd assume that we can all agree that it is inappropriate for Daemon to take Rhaenyra to a brothel and put her in a physically dangerous situation, away from the safety of the Kingsguard and her sworn protection, and to then leave her there in that situation.

It just appears strange to specifically rely on in-universe/period appropriate logic solely for the Daemyra situation yet other issues being addressed through this perspective are met with anger. Personally, I think both should be used and interrogated. But most Daemyra supporters I've seen tend to have a more contemporary stance on other issues yet only apply this in-universe logic to the Daemyra situation, and dislike it when such a perspective is applied to Rhaenyra's situation.

In regards to that, and as an example...

Based on archaic logic (I'm just going to call ASOIAF/in-universe/period-accurate logic "archaic logic" from now on lmao), Rhaenyra engaging in premarital sex, whether with Daemon or Criston, would be considered inappropriate. Women would be expected to remain a "maiden" until marriage and it would be highly dishonourable to engage in sexual activities before marriage. Rhaenyra's adventure to the brothel (and subsequent engagement with Criston - though the former is the extent of what the important figures become aware of, excepting Alicent) places her in a precarious decision in terms of her integrity as a woman & as heir.

From a contemporary perspective, we know that's bullshit. Men, Viserys and Daemon both included, frolick often in brothels and their sex lives are not as highly criticised as women. I can't name a male heir or ruler in the ASOIAF universe whose legitimacy and position was/would be called into question because he had sex. Yet Rhaenyra, being a woman, inherently faces prejudice if her engagement in premarital sex becomes widely known. We know, as a modern audience, that Rhaenyra's sex life shouldn't be everyone's business.

But why is it unacceptable to consider an archaic perspective when considering this... yet we can only use an archaic perspective to discuss Daemyra?

The obvious answer is bias, of course. I'm not into shitting on people's enjoyment. Like what you like, I won't stop you. But I'm going to critique because, uh, I can. And my personal bias is not for Daemyra, if you couldn't tell. So, anyway...

The HOTD fandom is a situation where lines are drawn and there is very transparent bias. I'm biased, you're biased, we're all biased. That's life. The situation with Daemyra definitely shows that.

Fans of Team Black, especially diehard Rhaenyra stans, tend to rely more heavily on contemporary/modern values and morals... except for Daemyra fans, whereby there's a noticeable shift towards archaic logic. This is noteworthy because it evidences that the subconscious bias recognises that sticking to contemporary values would result in having to make excuses for behaviours that are noticeably inappropriate aka grooming. So it's easier to rely on archaic logic to explain it away as being appropriate for the time. Ta da, no moral quandary!

The issue here isn't that they're using archaic logic because then I'd be a hypocrite. The issue is that those in this locus are transparently making an exception for themselves to avoid addressing the behaviours that are inappropriate based on contemporary values, whilst being critical of archaic logic being applied elsewhere. Obviously, the same can be said about other groups and situations.

My point is this:

Analysis of HOTD is interesting and media literacy of any entertainment content allows us to perceive the world in different ways and address a variety of issues in society, as well as understand the characters, ourselves, others and the world.

I think it's good to consider both archaic and contemporary attitudes towards different situations presented in HOTD. I also think it's good to be aware of and reflect upon personal biases, and perhaps scrutinise more closely why we instinctively shift towards one form of analysis, archaic or contemporary, over another.

Personally, I think that the show's narrative somewhat purposefully portrays Rhaenyra and Alicent's interactions with "romance" as both highlighting the damage patriarchy can inflict upon young girls, and the different ways it can manifest. Alicent is married off to an old man against her will and has his children whilst still being a child herself. Meanwhile, Rhaenyra is being drawn into sexuality and romance by Daemon, more or less being "lured" into what is expected of women as well as being lured into a precarious situation that places her wellbeing and position as heir at risk.

Both are women being manipulated as pawns of the patriarchy. Alicent evidently has no choice, devoid of her agency as a girl, whilst Rhaenyra has the illusion of choice, believing she is in control whilst being pulled left and right by Viserys, Otto, Daemon etc.

I could definitely go into more detail. But, anyway, those are just my thoughts on the double-standards of the Daemyra situation. Just a personal pet peeve. I feel like if you're supporting Daemyra then there's a necessity to acknowledge the contemporary/modern perspectives of it, especially if being critical of instances where archaic logic is applied elsewhere. Hope that makes sense 🙏🏻

#house of the dragon #hotd #hotd meta #hotd thoughts #rhaenyra targaryen #daemon targaryen #alicent hightower #daemyra #anti daemyra #tw: sa mention #just spitballing here #pro media literacy (lol) #basically: if ur using archaic logic to explain ur ship don't be coming for others using archaic logic to analyse other situations #also: pls don't convince yourselves u have moral high ground when ur using archaic logic to get around having to explain real sus behaviour #sksksksks i just hate in general the fandom playing morality olympics but that's a post for another time #is this... my longest post yet?? #and it's a DAEMYRA post? oh god help me #in my defence I've had this one pent up for a while now #if there are mistakes... uh no there isn't #i will gaslight u into believing this is well structured and well written 🥰😘

[garbage-floof]

do yall see one of your friends being a massive jerk and doing something slightly offensive and you fucking have a verbal fight w them in your head

like, you're a great friend! but if you don't shut the fick up and listen why this is offensive then we can't even be friends anymore

#adam's vent tag #this needs a lot of context in too tired to write #but #implying (in a joking manner no less) that someone in the room (metaphorically) is gay/trans to very obviously homo/transphobic classmates #does so much harm #like if someone comes out to you you keep your mouth shut even if they're a walking pride flag #just shut the fuck up #it's not that difficult #another small ick i have w this friend #is that i told him i wasn't very comfortable with my classmates jokes #(they were 'joking' about killing and shooting boys that wear dresses) #and that i also didn't feel safe around them #and he responded w 'theyre just joking. why are you taking them seriously?' #with a straight fucking face #do i even need to explain why this is fucked up to say to a trans kid? (or anyone) #i could give a million different examples of this #you can literally excuse an bad behaviour with this logic #if you can do that then i dont really trust you #anyway im ranting and rambling #and i want to strangle him!!!

[hopefulbuthelpless]

it is 2024 and people are still putting kink at pride discourse on my dash????? are yall not tired because im tired. if you put that shit on my dashboard i will unfollow you and i dont care which 'side' youre arguing its all so dumb and pointless amen

#like i go outside so i dont actually care. none of this is a real problem. #ooooh puritanism oooooh everything is so child friendly now are you seriously telling me queer kids have more options for community events #than adults. like is that actually your argument. be so serious #also. yall need to learn what logical fallacies are. i see people literally using the words slippery slope to argue. yall are NOT REAL #also also it is not my fault conservatives are homophobic. nobody who's arguing abt kink at pride is a conservative lawmaker. on either sid #legitimately kinda annoying as shit to see people saying "look this may not bother you but it bothers me' being told oh so youre a fascist. #youre a christian fascist conservative trying to appeal to the cishets. #thats fucking awful as shit! like can you try for just a second to actually understand the words someone is saying #anyway the people arguing FOR kink at pride are honestly far more annoying god bless #i dont even necessarily disagree but i Would punch you if you were talking w me irl kinda behaviour #all this to say. im done w this discourse. its pointless and im tiredddd are yall not tired #say it with me: capitalism is not the fault of the kids!!! corporatization and sanitization of queer identities is not the fault of kids!!! #if youre mad at walmart be mad at walmart not the teenagers theyre marketing to.

[cruelsister-moved2]

nostalgia for a lost past is like largely morally neutral i think it's more in how that past is imagined (and how much we acknowledge that the past is inherently imaginary) where we start to see issues but its like. really really weird to see how many self-styled left wing people seem to feel that reminiscing over a charming and idyllic is somehow inherently progressive. like what does the word progressive mean on its most fundamental level come ON.

#a part of me feels like saying miyazaki is reactionary as hell #whichwould be reinforced by his takes on female animators #and everything about the wind rises . .. . . . .. .. . . #but the other partof me is like well provided that the past is owned up to as an imaginary thats paradoxically only beautiful BECAUSE we ar #no longer in it etc etc etc then its probably fine #but its like really confusing and jarring to see people hold the opinionn like #miyazaki films are good/moral/left wing because they long to return to a past which is good/moral/communal. according to their own logic. #ummm. guy who has literally never encountered fascism before? shfiushgdfg #my biggest learning curve for myself rn is recognising that Emotion which gives rise to reactionary behaviour is not criminal #and even if it were its not possible to repress that emotion #so better to honestly address it than try and force yourself to pretend its not there. like yeah nostalgia is a huge part of most fascist #movements but the best way to counteract that is to be like yes i long for this imagined world or i think the past was great because i was #child there and less aware of The Horrors etc. #rather than like pretend you dont harbour that feeling at all. so thats why with revival moments im always like PLEASE JUST BE HONEST THAT #YOURE A REVIVAL. #i completely understand why u want to wear flower crowns and skip around in a field!!!! just dont be like 'im retvrning to the natural ways #of my ancestors'

[ofcowardiceandkings]

that sudden realisation that if i had less anxiety as a kid , i would have been in so much trouble lmfao

#the logical holes in adult logic and stupid unreasonable behaviour you exist with at school yknow #ive always had these thoughts but i never said anything because yknow adults scary #im probably more bitey than usual because my shoulder is bothering me more than usual for like no reason lol #and our upstairs neighbour is doing my head in by being unreasonable and loud with her child AGAIN #im soooooooo #that child is going to have issues later in life man #rory's ramblings

[piplupod]

me, frequently: i think i am somehow secretly a terrible evil person who needs to isolate themself so nobody gets hurt somehow by the rot that is hidden away at the core of my being

also me, while arachnophobic: i have to catch the spiders that get inside so I can release them outside bc it shouldn't be up to me whether i take a life or not, every life has inherent value and beauty simply by existing, and i have to put them into separate containers while I wait to transport them outside because I don't know if spiders would fight or cannibalize each other when kept in close quarters, and I'll make sure I dont have them in eyeline of each other and also make sure a couple sides of the container are covered by something so they feel safe and don't get too stressed out

#i do not know very much abt spider behaviour unfortunately bc of the phobia fjfkld #makes it rly hard to think abt them much less learn abt them #so i just try to apply general living thing knowledge to them in the hopes i get it right #also this post isnt me trying to say im some paragon of virtue or anything fjfkdl #it is just. so silly. how i wholeheartedly believe i must somehow be secretly evil and morally corrupt #and that i have to continuously hurt myself and isolate myself to make up for ... some secret evilness inside me #when i do shit like this without even rly thinking abt it #and the worst part is im typing all this out while still believing there is a rot inside my soul that everyone should stay away from #and maybe im just making this post to convince myself im okay when in reality im a terrible person (this does not make sense or track) #logically i can know all sorts of things. but in practice? i will still believe all kinds of fucked up things gjfkfl #okay i need to stop posting here good golly!! i talk too much if i let myself onto this account omfg #i hope everyone is doing as okay as they can be in their individual circumstances!!!! 💗 #pippen needs 2nd breakfast #spider mention

[hella1975]

my brain: im stressed for exams

me: let's study then so we feel more prepared

my brain: no. we're gonna procrastinate because we're so stressed

me: that makes no sense, but okay. why don't we do something we enjoy to feel better?

my brain: no because then i'll feel guilty that i'm not studying

me: so let's study

my brain: NO

#like what kind of instinct did this evolve from because there is NO logic here? #im just so annoyed at how miserable i am atm bc it's literally entirely my fault #i could either choose to sack exams off completely and do things i enjoy #like go out or write and focus on what *I* want to do #OR i could focus only on exams and at least feel less stressed by how much studying i was doing #and do you know what im doing? NEITHER OF THOSE THINGS #WHY #WHY CANT WE PICK ONE #THIS IS SO STUPID #MY EXAM IS IN SIX DAYS I HAVE AN ENTIRE SEMESTER'S WORTH OF CONTENT TO FIGURE OUT #AND IM NOT EVEN COMMITTING TO THE BIT LIKE IF YOU'RE GONNA FAIL AT LEAST DONT TANK UR MENTAL HEALTH #AND DO SOMETHING FUN OR MAKE YOURSELF GET OUT OF THE HOUSE #like i have not written anything in WEEKS i just keep jumping between documents and staring longingly at them #i WANT to write but im not letting myself but i wont revise either this is so dumb im so mad #genuinely enraged with my own behaviour lmfaooo #hella goes to uni

[moonscape]

emery just told me about breloom's plot in explorers of the sp!rit THAT'S SO FUCKING STUPID LMAO

#bwark #oh noooo breloom is so badly done to. he got kicked out of the guild for not doing his job. chatot is so cruel. fuck offffff #people saying that chatot pawns off work is such a stupid fucking take #like. you're part of the guild it's LITERALLY YOUR JOB #do you think chimecho wouldn't be kicked out if she just refused to provide meals one day? because she's clearly accomodated help????? #that's so fucking stupid. i haven't even played the game but everything ive heard about it sounds like the creator wants to feel justified #in hating chatot so they make shit up about him. that's a problem with pmd fans in general tbh #no chatot doesn't steal money from you. he's ordered to by the exploration federation #no chatot doesn't pawn his work off on you. he's just assigning tasks?? that's his job??? he's just a manager apply your logic to the real #world please #no chatot doesn't call you a liar over the bad future. wigglytuff literally says that chatot believed you from the start #and no it wasn't to test the guild's bonds. chatot was so obviously lying idk how that's missed so much #like chatot's behaviour throughout the game makes it clear that he likes to keep it professional (because lbr wigglytuff isn't doing shit to #help run things) and it's not unreasonable to for him to think that personal emotions would get in the way of that #that's literally why he lied during that scene. he doesn't wear his heart on his sleeve. it's not some personal vendetta against hero and #partner lmao #like im not saying you're not allowed to dislike him or that he's right for the perfect apple incident and not putting his pride aside after #the dark future (god forbid a character has flaws that he makes up for during the brine cave incident). but like nothing annoys me more than #spreading blatantly untrue information just to justify your hatred of him like. you're allowed to just not like him you don't have to make #it deep or anything #also if it seems like im more defensive of chatot than i should be it's because somebody has to i guess #nobody in the pmd fandom knows how to be normal about him and so mamy people don't want to read between the lines with his character #also im still reserving proper judgement of eots until i play it but everything ive heard from it so far doesn't sound good at all #i can respect it for what it's achieved as a fan project. that doesn't automatically make it good though

[professionalowl]

not reblogging the post because i know it's a flawed test (and infuriatingly poorly worded to wit) but the RAADS-R autism test is going around again and i got an 87, which is i think what i got the last time i took it and also tracks - i'm personally pretty certain that i'm not autistic, but (autistic) friends of mine have historically been split on the issue because apparently i 'act' like an autistic person and they're often surprised when i say i'm actually not

#my *closest* friends tend to think i'm not but - to quote one guy - '[i'm] very smart and smart ppl tend to have traits that overlap' #which is an interesting assessment (he's autistic tb clear) and i think i know where it's coming from #i'm very direct with comments; i often have trouble with empathy; i'm clever (or y'know 'clever' for a given value of the word); #i don't feel emotions particularly strongly - or immediately - and this comes across in my speech #which i've been told can come off as detached/disaffected/uncaring even when it's not trying to be; #i'm apparently quite difficult to read sometimes? or come off as intimidating per neutral expression; #uh. one time an english teacher told me that i'd taught her to 'think more logically' whatever the fuck that means; #these are i think stereotypical autistic 'smart guy' traits which do not actually map on to the majority of autistic people afaik #at least not as a package or all expressed the same way - but in this case i think it's a category error #interesting food for thought nonetheless. i spend some time thinking about it because people do ask me occasionally #and the general autistic mileu of tumblr.com has actually helped me be nicer to myself about those traits #(as well as check myself abt other people; i'm not going to pretend to be some kind of saintly autistic whisperer or w/e) #considered going back and taking the test with the 'most generous' and then the 'least generous' answers and comparing them #but i can't be bothered. add a button for 'in specific situations' or die by my hand #i WILL say that some of said autistic friends who were surprised to find out i wasn't #expressly thought i WAS because they drew a correlation between their behaviour and my own #so it's not just 'people are misreading me because of stereotypes about how autistic people act' although i do think that can be an element #let me know if this post is weird or w/e it is literally just speculating on myself and how people perceive me #as a consequence of tending to occupy circles otherwise occupied largely by neurodivergent people #('fandom' and 'archaeology and anthropology')

[electrosquash]

And i do feel like there's an increased pressure on people with personality disorders to prove their moral integrity (e.g. on occasions like current events) and show they're one of the good ones and this time i'm choosing not to

#been thinking about this for a few days now but i can't really put it into words. #basically on “low bpd” phases i'm thinking every thought twice and running on several layers of introspection #to make up for my lack of empathy and the possibility that i'm spiralling into bizarre logical systems built up on emotions firing wild #and i do take pride in being able to manage my bpd somewhat well but when i see people without pd expressing the same behaviours #that i'm expected to never ever let come to surface lest i be branded a horrible abusive manipulative etc person i get a little bit jealous #bpd stuff #i don't know if this makes sense. ignore if it doesn't. jealous probably isn't the right word either