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#lineart is so good i cri

sincerely-sofie · 1 month

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The finishing of this fanfic has left me with some pretty mixed emotions. On the one hand, I dont want it to end. It's such an incredible piece of work and even though I finally committed to reading it a few weeks ago, it already feels like such a significant part of my life. On the other hand, I'm a little glad that it's over. FAR from the sense it was bad (I'll steal your liver if thats how you interpret it) but moreso in the sense that it was like a good crying session. It's something that a lot of us (or I assume a lot of us) typically want to avoid even though we know its good for us, and satisfying after the fact. It's like catharsis in a way. Endings aren't always a great feeling in the moment, but it's something that we can look back on with a fondness.

I'm so glad I found this work. I'm being completely serious when I say that this fanfic, and the other content you make, has changed my life for the better. Its helped me reconnect with that love I have for creativity after nearly a decade of not making anything even though I wanted to. It's helped pulled me out of a few ruts of depression. It's helped me realize that I'm not actually emotionally stunted (per my own conclusions) and be more willing to cry instead of burying those feelings. In the past I would just, kill these kinda thoughts before they got far because of how much I wanted to avoid crying. Much less actually writing them down, or express them to someone else. But now, I've been crying the whole time I write this, and for the first time in, I think ever, I'm okay with that. I know we don't actually know each other, but you've genuinely helped me become a better person with the things you make. Thank you so much for everything you've done Sofie. hey look! I got your name right!

But enough about me. I feel like it's getting indulgent at this point. (I've gotten dehydrated with how much ive cried writing this and from what I can tell, you cry a lot more than I do. So go drink some water first, and then) I wanna hear your thoughts. What are your thoughts and feelings about your work being finished? Do you have plans to take a break from creative endevors for a while, or are you gonna keep going? Are you going to be expanding more on this and other au's, different fanworks or move into something completely your own? Whatever the case may be, I'm excited to see what more you are going to come up with!

From the bottom of my heart, and on behalf of everyone else, Thank you for everything.

It's so surreal to have posted that final chapter. I finished the first draft almost 100 days ago exactly, and I spent a number of days after completing it kind of adrift. I'd go to my computer every morning like I had during the month prior and sit down, ready to write, only to remember that I was actually supposed to be taking a break before I made the final edits. It didn't click in my head that I had actually done it… until a couple weeks later when it hit me like a truck that I had an entire completed manuscript sitting in my Google Docs. I think I was making myself lunch at that moment, and I had to bolt to lie down on the floor and put my legs up against the wall because I was ready to pass out at the realization.

This feels pretty similar. For me, The Present is a Gift— the main fanfic, at least— was finished in mid-January. But the process of uploading it and agonizing over what people thought of every passing update wouldn't be formally done until about 3 months later. It still hasn't clicked in my head that I won't be posting a new update once Tuesday rolls around.

On the subject of taking a break— I've actually been taking a break, at least partway! I've barely written anything after I finished TPiaG's first draft, and I haven't drawn much “serious” art, for lack of a better word, since I started my blog. I've still been making things, yes, but scattered oneshots and sketchy pieces without solid lineart are not my typical fare. I'm usually a lot more “exact” with what I make— words fail me here— I hope I'm not being too vague! I might take a brief break as I finish up the winter semester, but that would be less a break from creating and more of an “OH MY WORD I NEED TO FOCUS ON NOTHING BUT PASSING THESE COURSES” kinda thing.

TPiaG (along with its derivative AUs) is still very much a living project to me— there's a lot more stories the characters have in them, even if I struggle to envision a full-on sequel. I'm absolutely going to answer the asks relating to it that I've received over the months along with any I continue to receive, and if I get any ideas for comics or oneshots here and there, I'll make them. As for what's officially next up on the Sincerely Sofie menu, I'm planning to make a visual novel that's a lot more meaty than the last one I made. I'm not sure if it will be original or based on TPiaG— but a visual novel is the medium I'm planning on!

I'm so overwhelmed by your kindness. I truly don't have any words. This project started off as something private to help distract me from a depressive episode and to process trauma, and it's become so much more. I'm so glad it was able to help you. Catharsis was the keyword for TPiaG— I wanted it to uproot difficult emotions and help people start to heal from them, but I never dreamed it would really help anyone but myself. So to hear it was able to provide you with that is unbelievably meaningful to me.

I gave myself the goal somewhat recently to let myself cry whenever the urge strikes me. I used to go months without crying, and whenever I did shed tears, it was alone in my room while muffling the few sounds I accidentally let slip. I'm a natural crybaby, but I had schooled myself into thinking for a number of reasons that it was bad to cry— that it was selfish, or attention-seeking, or weak— so I've been trying to reclaim my teary-eyed identity. It's been difficult, but it's so freeing to let myself feel things fully. All of this is to say: let the tears fall. I've helped more people by crying than my stoicism ever did.

Thanks again. I can't properly word my gratitude, but know that it's overwhelming :,>

#sofie answers asks #the present is a gift au

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bcdrawsandwrites · 2 years

Photo

[ID: A Psychonauts fanfic chapter banner. On the left side of the banner is white text reading “Chapter 4: Old Intel.” On the right is Raz in his Psychonauts 2 outfit, shown from behind and turned slightly to the right, looking very frightened as he looks back as he’s held by his collar by a glowing purple TK hand that looks like Loboto’s. /end ID]

Psychonauts Ruin Everything

Fandom: Psychonauts Rating: K+ Genre: Angst, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort Characters: Razputin Aquato, Caligosto Loboto, Morceau Oleander, Otto Mentallis, Sasha Nein, Milla Vodello, Truman Zanotto Warnings: References to child abuse and medical abuse Description: A few days after the whirlwind of events of Psychonauts 2, Razputin receives his first mission as a Junior Psychonaut: go into the mind of the recently-re-captured Caligosto Loboto and make sure he’s ready to be released… and if not, well… go from there. But it shouldn’t be that hard, right? Loboto’s all better now that his moral compass is back… isn’t he? Beta Readers: @jaywings and @of-science-and-stars (also HUGE THANKS TO @causticbicaudate FOR DOING THE LINEART OF THIS BANNER FOR ME)

—~~~—

Chapter 4: Old Intel

Summary: In which Raz has to relay some intel and the mission gets a whole lot more complicated.

---~~~---

With a gasp, Raz was back in Oleander's office. He was still sitting in the desk chair... but Loboto was no longer in the chair across from him. He was standing, the device Otto had given him rapidly unwinding itself from his body. The cables bound themselves up into a tight ball before dropping to the ground, the light in front of the device turning from green to red with a low-pitched bloop.

Loboto stared down at Raz, and Raz stared up at Loboto, raising his goggles with one hand and gripping the armrest of the chair with the other. "D-Doctor Loboto," he stammered. "Are you, um... f-feeling any better?"

The doctor's smile widened unpleasantly as he towered over Raz. "I think I'm feeling something."

Raz really, really wished he'd asked Oleander how to keep someone restrained with TK. "Is that... um... a good something, or—"

Without warning Loboto made a grasping gesture with his hand, and Raz found himself hoisted up by the collar of his turtleneck by a spindly, glowing purple hand. Loboto was wincing and his hand was shaking, and Raz was wobbling in his grip, but Loboto continued to grin. "Oh, yes, it's definitely a good something."

For the moment Raz found himself paralyzed. Yet in spite of how his heart pounded in his chest, his thoughts were oddly calm. I can't attack him. If I do, he could retaliate, and I don't know what he's capable of. Instead of fighting back, he held up his hands submissively. "Hey, you can... you can use your powers again! That's great! If you want, w-we can—"

"I have you to thank for that!" Loboto cried, lifting Raz slightly higher. "What a good boy! So nice and helpful! Such a model patient."

"P-patient—?!"

"No, how silly of me. I suppose you'd be the doctor this time around, wouldn't you?" Loboto flinched, and Raz dipped in his grasp, yelping. "Whoopsie! Still need to exercise this muscle a bit."

"Yes, you do!" Raz cried, nodding frantically. "You'll need practice and training, and we can help you—"

"Help, yes!" Loboto went on, hoisting Raz back up with his TK again. "I think I can handle the physical therapy on my own. What I need..." He leaned in closer, and in spite of his smile, his brow furrowed. "...is a discharge form."

In Raz's panicked state, it took him a moment to piece together what Loboto meant. "You��you want me to have you released?"

"Yes! Precisely." Loboto reached out with his claws, and Raz flinched away, only to feel himself patted lightly on the head. "You're going to tell your little psychic friends that I am all better, and you are going to release me."

The telekinetic grip holding Raz was shuddering, and Raz wasn't sure if it was because Loboto was struggling with it, or because he was angry. If it was the former, maybe Raz could do something, but if it was the latter, he was in trouble. Not worth the risk right now, he decided, and hesitantly met Loboto's gaze. "Okay, um... first, if you could put me down—"

"Then you agree to let me go?"

Raz managed a weak smile. "I... just think we'd be able to discuss it better when I'm not six feet off the floor."

"Oh no you don't!" Loboto growled, his face twitching. Raz couldn't tell if he was being shaken, or if Loboto's grip was just that unsteady. "I'm not releasing you until you agree to release me. Do we have an agreement?"

This is not going as well as I'd hoped, Raz thought meekly. "I... I'm not sure if—"

"Do we have an agreement?!" Loboto snarled, his eyes flashing.

Before Raz could respond, several things happened in short succession.

The door slammed open, and Loboto released Raz just in time for a large, green psychic fist to collide with the doctor and knock him flying into the wall. Raz, meanwhile, crashed onto the chair beneath him. Gasping, he looked toward the doorway to find Coach Oleander with one hand to his temple, the other held in front of him in a fist.

"Coach!" Raz cried, scrambling off the office chair. Though he was still rattled, he felt more stable when his feet touched the ground.

"I knew this weirdo was gonna cause trouble," Oleander growled before glancing at Raz. "You all right, soldier?"

"F-fine!" Raz replied, though he felt himself shaking.

"What was that?" Loboto whined, raising his head from where he'd been knocked off his feet. "I thought we had a truce...?" Upon seeing Oleander, however, he clenched his claws together. "Oh, little army man! I didn't think we'd be seeing each other again so soon."

"Shut it, Cal!" With a quick sweep of his hand, Oleander snatched Loboto with TK, holding him firmly. He then smiled at Raz. "That's how you restrain an enemy."

"I’m not an enemy—I'm a changed man!" Loboto cried, kicking out with his feet.

"He is different now, Coach Oleander," Raz said, holding up his hands. "I went into his mind—into a really deep part of it, and he told me himself he didn't want to steal brains anymore."

Oleander frowned. "That doesn't explain why he was holdin' you up in his... uh..." He blinked. "...Your psychic energy isn't purple, is it, soldier?"

"About that..." Raz rubbed the back of his helmet sheepishly. "I may have... kinda... helped him... remove the mental block for his psychic powers..."

"Psychic... powers...?" Oleander's gaze darted from Raz to Loboto several times. "You're tellin' me this guy's been a psychic all along?"

"I... may have forgotten to mention a few things I saw when I entered his mind the first time," Raz said, and wrapped his arms around himself. Already he was thinking back to the trouble he'd caused in Agent Forsythe's mind and how he hadn't told anyone until it had turned dangerous. "It... it seemed too private, and I didn't think it would come up again." Looking up, he feared the Coach might be angry, but his expression was softer than he'd expected.

"You psychics are one to talk about privacy," Loboto muttered, looking away.

At Loboto's interruption, Oleander frowned again. "You remember what I taught you about memory vaults, soldier?"

Raz thought for a moment. "You... said that the enemy isn't allowed secrets at wartime. But—"

"That applies here, too." Oleander turned his gaze back to Loboto. "Looks like we'll need to take him back to the others to sort things out. This is a bigger deal than we thought." Waving for Raz to follow, he hauled Loboto out of the office via TK.

"Uuugh, not this again!" Loboto whined as he continued to struggle in Oleander's grip. "I wanna leave!"

Initially Raz stepped toward the door before remembering something, and turned around to snatch Otto's device from the floor and put it in his bag. "Is it really that big of a deal?" he asked as he ran to catch up with Oleander. "I don't think he's very good at psychic powers."

Loboto's gaze snapped over to Raz, his brow furrowed, but he said nothing.

"Good enough to cause problems," Oleander remarked. He put a hand to his temple again, then nodded a moment later. "Otto's gonna meet with us in Truman's office."

Raz nodded, only for his stomach to give a jolt. Please don't call Sasha—

"Sasha and Milla are on their way, too."

"Aren't they kinda... busy, though?" Raz asked hesitantly. "We probably shouldn't bother them."

"They wouldn't exactly be happy if I didn't report to them," the Coach muttered.

"Right," Raz said, wrapping his arms around himself and keeping his gaze to the floor. Memories of just how angry Sasha and Milla had been with him after he'd messed things up in Agent Forsythe's mind flitted through his head, and his stomach knotted up at the thought that he would have to go through that again.

That's not a proper march, soldier, Oleander said over telepathy.

Shaking himself, Raz straightened his back and dropped his arms. Right, sorry, sir.

You all right?

Raz winced. Well... it's just... I really messed this up. He glanced at Loboto, who was staring with interest at the aquarium as they passed it. I just wanted to help him.

What, him? That guy's a bit of a wild card. Oleander shrugged. You never know what's gonna happen with him. I didn't expect him to come back with a pepper grinder for an arm when I— He faltered.

Raz glanced quickly between Loboto and Oleander, one eyebrow raised.

Oleander went on quickly: Point is, pretty sure this one isn't your fault. The guy’s unpredictable. You're not gonna hear Nein chew you out over this one, if that's what you're worried about.

Oh. Some of the tension eased from Raz's shoulders, but then he gave a jolt. Wait, how did you know about...?

The Coach didn't answer, only frowning and looking away.

Before Raz could question him again, the nearest Otto B.O.N. slammed open as they passed, and Otto himself sprang out of it, landing neatly next to Raz. "Already back with an update, eh Razputin?" he asked, eyebrows raised in interest. "How did my invention work out, by the way?"

TKing the device out of his bag, Raz held it up awkwardly. "So, about that..."

—-~~~—-

The meeting room was silent.

Raz fidgeted in his chair, looking every which way to avoid looking at Oleander, Truman, Otto, Sasha, or Milla, though he was pretty sure he could feel their gazes upon him. Loboto, who had been struggling in Oleander's grip for most of the time he'd been held, was now very still and silent. His shoulders were hunched, his lips a tight line, and his gaze was out the window and focused on the Nerve Center below. For a moment Raz considered apologizing to him, but what good would that do now?

It was Otto who finally broke the silence. "A lobotomy victim," he murmured. "Those didn't usually fare too well."

If it were possible, Loboto went even more tense. Raz finally looked up to cast a worried glance around the table, suddenly wondering if they would say something to set him off.

Otto's gaze was trained on Loboto, his brow furrowed seriously. Truman was rubbing his forehead, eyes wide as he seemed to still be processing the new information, while Oleander had lowered his head in thought. Farther down the table, Milla's gaze had gone distant, while Sasha's expression remained unreadable beneath his goggles, though he was turned slightly toward Milla. I wonder what they're talking about, Raz thought, only to give a start when Oleander spoke.

"I... heard about those being done, back in the day," he remarked, fiddling with his hands. "It's... part of why I never told my folks. But I'd never heard of it actually being done to..."

"I've not seen any records of such a thing," Sasha remarked. "To adults, certainly, especially back when psychic powers were still categorized as an illness. But to be done to a child..."

"There's no record of it," Truman echoed. "None. We had agents sent out to hospitals to gather intel on this sort of thing. Sabotages, even, whenever we caught it. But it was always adults, never children. If any records existed, they must have been destroyed or modified."

"Wouldn't shock me," Otto remarked. "Psychic prejudice or no, something like that happening to a child would've created quite the stir! They likely didn't want it known."

"Neither did I," Loboto growled through his teeth, still refusing to look up.

Raz flinched; maybe he should have apologized, but it seemed too late for it now.

"...Caligosto."

In spite of how soft her voice had been, Milla immediately drew the attention of those present in the room (except for Loboto, whose optics had not turned from the window). Her face was drawn in sympathy, and she looked as though she wanted to move closer. "We understand that you didn't want this discussed—"

"But you did it anyway," Loboto snapped, finally looking up. His gaze was aimed at Milla, whose expression did not change, while Loboto's face twisted in a furious smile. "Yes! It's a common trend for you Psychonauts. 'Sorry to dredge up your worst memories, doctor, but it's for the mission!' 'We don't mean to hurt you, but we're going to use fifty different devices on you until we get what we want.' 'We won't barge into your brain without your permission, but we're gonna keep pestering you until we get that permission.' Right?"

Raz's gaze darted uneasily between Loboto and the others. While Truman and Oleander both glared at Loboto, the latter with his fists clenched, Otto merely watched on in surprise. Sasha's mouth was drawn in a tight line, but Milla, to Raz's surprise, didn't seem upset. If anything, she was looking at the doctor with more sympathy.

"We all want what's best for you, Caligosto," she said. "We know you're hurting, and—"

The doctor let out an ugly laugh that made Raz wince, and several others at the table gave a start.

"Oh! Were you serious?" he asked, his voice edged in bitterness. "Now you give me sympathy?" Again he let out another peal of laughter. "That's rich! What do you think it'll get out of me, huh? You think you can butter me up with a bunch of lies about feeling sorry for me? Won't work, you stupid—"

Sasha stood up, and Raz could feel the glare beneath his goggles. Loboto's gaze turned to meet him, though no part of him seemed intimidated.

"Enough!" Truman cried, standing up and urging Sasha to sit. "This will get us nowhere. What's done is done—we all understand what's happened to the doctor."

Slowly Sasha took a seat, and Truman with him. The room went silent again as some of the tension eased.

Raz was the one to break the silence this time. "So... what does this mean for us? For him?"

The Grand Head of the Psychonauts looked tired, and Raz wasn't sure if that was due to the situation or just his permanent state of being. "Well... that's what we're here to discuss," he said, leaning forward. "There's no precedent for this sort of thing happening. We've dealt with those who have attempted to hide psychic powers from us, but they never get very far. But to have had psychic powers..." He gestured uncertainly. "...removed, for lack of a better term, only for them to grow back..."

"It's extraordinary!" Otto cut in. "Imagine the implications! Truman, I know you've told me no before, but—"

"I don't think they grew back," Raz said, sitting up straighter. "I think he always had them, he was just... afraid to use them."

"Afraid?!" Loboto snarled. "I'm not afraid of anything!"

"Yeah," Oleander raised an eyebrow. "Just like you weren't afraid of Nick making you face an old lady—"

A pen weakly flicked across the desk in Oleander's direction, but that in combination with the glare Loboto was giving him silenced him.

"Enough about me," Loboto went on, finally facing the others. "Let's talk about you. Mainly, let's talk about you letting me out of here!"

"Oh yeah, you've proved yourself real trustworthy on that front," Oleander grumbled.

"You're one to talk about trust, mister traitor!" Loboto shot back, and Oleander grit his teeth.

"He did say he didn't want to take anyone's brains anymore, though," Raz said, looking over to Loboto. "Right?"

"Right, yes, no more 'stealing brains' on the menu for me. I'm fully reformed and ready to leave."

Truman eyed him, leaning away from his direction. "I'm... not sure we can trust him on that one."

"But I went into his mind and everything! I talked to his inner child, the one that was still afraid of using his powers. He... he said he didn't want to be messing with brains like his father did."

To Raz's surprise, Oleander's expression softened, while Otto and Sasha exchanged glances. "The deeper parts of the brain are more reliable than the surface level," Sasha put in begrudgingly.

Otto nodded. "That's right. I don't believe there's any reason to distrust him in that regard."

Finally Loboto seemed to brighten, his gaze darting between Sasha, Otto, and Truman.

"That is good to know," Truman admitted, rubbing his forehead, and Loboto's smile almost looked genuinely happy for once. "But that says nothing about whether or not he could plan to hurt others, which he has plenty of means to do with his newfound psychic abilities."

Loboto's face fell, and he kicked the underside of the desk.

"Further investigation and treatment will be needed," Truman went on. "In addition, I'd like to see some form of psychic training for him to give him proper control of those powers."

"Training?!" Loboto wailed.

He wasn't the only one bewildered by the Grand Head's statement. Sasha and Milla were both eyeing each other in silent communication. Otto meanwhile leaned back, rubbing his chin in thought, and Oleander looked between Loboto and Truman a few times. "No offense, sir," he began, "but is it really in our best interest to get that bozo to hone his psychic powers?"

"You tell me, Agent Oleander." Truman raised a brow. "You work at the camp. You of anyone should know how much of a danger untrained psychics can be, both to themselves and others."

"...Point taken."

Looking away, Raz gripped the armrests of his chair. "Learning how to use them the right way is important, too."

"Exactly," Truman said, and Raz felt his heart lift a little. "With that settled, I believe we're in agreement?"

"No, we're not in agreement!" Loboto growled. "I didn't agree to any of this!"

Truman eyed him evenly. "If you're so eager to leave, doctor, we can have that arranged."

"Oh, good! Call me a cab, then, why don't you—"

As Truman leaned toward Loboto, the faintest smile appeared on his face. "No, I believe the police would be the ones escorting you."

Loboto's optics flashed, and he growled, kicking the table again. Half a second later, one of the pens sitting atop the table flicked in Truman's direction.

Without a hint of acknowledgement, Truman faced the rest of the table. "Now, given the strangeness of the circumstances, I believe Agent Aquato is in need of some assistance."

Jumping in his chair, Raz faced Truman anxiously. "Oh—I-I'm sorry, Grand Head Zanotto—"

"There's no need to apologize, Agent Aquato. You haven't done anything wrong. But as we've seen that this mission is a bit heavier than originally expected, I'm assigning you a senior agent to accompany you." With that, Truman's gaze turned to Oleander, who gave a jerk of surprise. "Agent Oleander, from here on out, you will be accompanying Agent Aquato on his mission."

"Wh-what?!" Oleander cried. "But sir, I have things to finish before I head back—"

"Oh, don't worry, Morry," Otto said with a laugh. "Your pet projects will be waiting for you when you return to the base."

Groaning, Oleander gave a defeated nod. "Yes, sir, I'll take care of it." He rubbed his chin in thought. “Well, guess I can’t complain too much about being sent on a mission…” Casting a glance back at Loboto, however, he frowned. “Just wish it wasn’t this one.”

Loboto huffed.

“Well, I wish I didn’t have to assign you this one either,” Truman went on, “but given you’re the only other senior agent available at the moment, I don’t have much choice in this matter. Just remember you do still need to report back to Agents Nein, Vodello, and me. Understood?”

“Yeah, I got it.”

Truman clapped his hands together. "Good. If we've no more dissenting opinions here, I think I'm good to call this meeting to a close." Glancing at a clock on the wall, he frowned. "Normally I would send you off on your mission immediately, but since timing isn't dire here, I think we could all use some rest. Agents Nein, Vodello." The two turned their attention to him. "Has your examination of Gristol Malik ruled out the possibility of psychic powers?"

"That is correct, Truman," Sasha confirmed. "We've made little progress, but that's one thing we're certain of."

"Excellent. We'll have him moved from the psychoisolation chambers and to one of the holding cells. Since we've determined Loboto can use psychic powers, he'll be held in psychoisolation for the time being instead. I don't want those two anywhere near each other again," he finished with a shudder.

"I don't think he wants that either," Raz added quietly. He glanced back at Loboto, who gave a shudder as well.

"I don't mean to butt in, but my anti-psychic restraints haven't failed anyone yet," Otto said, leaning forward. "We could certainly use a set of those and just keep him in a holding cell—"

"Yeah, if you want him driven nuts from an itch in his back by morning," Oleander grumbled, reaching back to scratch his shoulder.

"Well, can't be much worse than a padded room and a straitjacket," Loboto said, and Raz turned to give him a worried look.

"It's been a long week," Milla put in. "The psychoisolation chamber will be more comfortable, and I think Caligosto could do with a proper rest."

"We all could. Including me." Truman pushed himself away from the desk, and all but Loboto followed suit. "Agents Nein and Vodello, if you could handle the transfer of Gristol Malik, please, and that should be all for tonight."

"Of course, sir," Sasha said. With that, he and Milla stepped out of the meeting room together, heading toward the Otto B.O.N. in Truman's office.

"As for Loboto," Truman went on, turning to face Raz, "would you and Agent Oleander move him to the psychoisolation chamber, please?"

"Yes, sir!" Raz said with a determined nod, and looked over to Oleander for confirmation. The Coach sighed begrudgingly, but nodded.

"I'll accompany them to make sure there's no mishaps," Otto said with a smile. "It's not far from my lab, anyway."

"Great!" Raz grinned, still ecstatic at the prospect of getting a mission straight from the Grand Head himself. However, his face fell when he looked back at Loboto, who still sat tensely in his chair. His expression did not change when Oleander lifted him back up with TK.

"Right. I got the cargo, so let's get going." Oleander opted to hoist him over the table rather than try to navigate him around the pushed-back chairs, then had to turn the doctor on his side to get him through the door. "Tall person comin' through... Hrmf. Don't get to say that often."

"Good night," Truman called, using his own TK to straighten up the meeting room as they stepped out.

As it wasn't possible to carry someone through the Otto B.O.N. system, the group had to walk all the way to the psychoisolation chamber. It was a good thing too, Raz realized, as it meant there was less of a risk of Loboto and Gristol seeing each other during the transfer; Sasha and Milla would have Gristol out long before they got there. Heck, they would probably get him to the holding cells before Raz's group even left the Motherlobe.

"This is some mission to have dropped on you before you head back to camp," Oleander muttered to himself as they descended down into the lobby.

"It seems like a fascinating opportunity!" Otto exclaimed. "I wish I'd been assigned to the case instead, but you know mental projection's not my forte."

"What a shame," Loboto mumbled, and Raz glanced back at him. His head and his optics were drooping, the lights in them dim. He didn't seem the type to give up easily, so he chalked it up to exhaustion.

Otto either ignored the comment or didn't seem to notice. "You'll have to tell me all about it when you're done."

"Yeah, sure thing," Oleander said, rolling his eye.

As they walked, Raz’s initial excitement of being sent on another mission by the Grand Head himself began to fade, and he thought about the reality of what it entailed. Soon now they’d be entering Loboto’s head yet again… and he mulled over what he’d seen there last time. A thought struck him, and he reached out to Oleander silently: Hey, Coach, can I ask you something?

Shoot, private.

Glancing back at Loboto, Raz frowned. You remember what I said about when I talked to Loboto’s inner child… but I don’t get what happened at the end. He kinda… wasn’t Loboto’s inner child anymore. Or something?

Oleander’s brow furrowed. That’s still him, though. Your inner child’s still a part of you, unless something weird’s going on.

Raz’s heart sank. So… that was really just Loboto the whole time, pretending to be a kid?

What? No, this stuff’s a lot more complicated than that. Oleander lifted his helmet with one hand to scratch beneath it with the other. Look, soldier, I’m a drill sergeant, not a psychologist. This part of the mind’s not my forte, but… Sasha was right about what he said earlier. The inner child’s a deeper part of you, and that stuff can’t really be faked.

While that did take the weight off Raz’s heart, he still found his brow furrowing in thought. But… how did he change like that?

I mean, I wasn’t there in the trenches with you when it happened… but it sounds like the main part of him figured out what was happening and stepped in and took control there.

Oh, I guess that makes sense… Looking back at Loboto again, though, it didn’t look like any part of him was in control now, as he was nearly dozing off in Oleander’s grip. He turned back to the Coach. Thank you, sir. He paused as something else occurred to him. But how come that never happened with your— He broke off, realizing that might not be a good thing to bring up at the moment.

At first he thought the Coach might’ve caught what he was saying, as Oleander winced when they stepped outside. The moon and stars shone in the dark-blue sky above, while lights scattered throughout the quarry kept the different paths lit. Raz was worried that Oleander was upset about the mention of his own mental world until he realized what the Coach was looking at.

The psychoisolation chamber sat on the other side of the quarry, and Oleander glanced from it, to Loboto, and then to Otto. "Say, Otto, speakin' of what you were saying earlier, about things that aren't people's fortes... D'you mind carrying him from here, Otto? I'm not crossin' all that with this bozo in tow."

"Not at all!" Brightening, Otto reached out with his own telekinetic hand, which snatched Loboto the second Oleander let go, quickly enough that the doctor didn’t seem to notice, his head still bobbing as he dozed.

"Thanks. Meet you there." With that, the Coach made for the nearest Otto B.O.N., leaving Raz and Otto to bring Loboto the rest of the way themselves. The trip across the quarry would involve a lot of levitation jumps for Raz, while Otto gracefully hovered alongside him, carrying Loboto just behind.

"Oh, this should be interesting as well!" Otto said as they finally approached the massive building.

Raz released his final thought bubble and landed softly on his feet. "What should?"

Otto carefully landed next to Raz. "Given the condition of his brain and the fact that you've recently reactivated his powers," he began, and completely failed to notice the sudden frantic gestures from Raz to stop talking, "I'm curious as to how it'll react to the filtered psilirium—"

"Wh-what?!" Loboto jerked fully awake, and his mechanical eyes retracted.

"Otto—" Raz hissed urgently, but the scientist went on:

"Oh, you know, psilirium has this peculiar effect on psychics—"

"I know what it does!" Loboto cried, flailing in Otto's grip. "Let me go! You're not giving that stuff to me again! I'll give you all a root canal!"

"Doctor Loboto, hey!" Raz called softly, rushing up to the doctor's side. "Listen, it'll be okay. It's filtered psilirium—it's not the same stuff they used on you, or what you used on Truman, all right? I know it sounds scary, but you're gonna be okay."

"Who said I was scared?!" Loboto snarled, in spite of the way he trembled in Otto's grasp.

"Razputin's not wrong, hypothetically," Otto put in. "I developed the first psychoisolation chambers with Compton Boole myself, and they're perfectly safe for both regular and non-psychics." Though whether they’ll be safe for you, we’ll have yet to see, he went on in his mind, and Raz winced.

"Come on," Raz said, waving them on ahead. "That receptionist is probably driving the Coach crazy..."

Once they took the lift up, they found that to be exactly the case. Oleander was leaning against the wall opposite of the check-in desk and massaging his temple, while Terryl was leaning over her desk and toward him, somehow seeming overwhelming in spite of being several yards away. "Yes, Terryl, I get it—"

"But you know, it's always so nice to hear from the senior agents! I don't see much of them other than Boole and Forsythe—HI!" she called, waving enthusiastically at the ones who had entered. "Hi! Hii! Oh, Otto Mentallis! And that boy from the other day! And... Hackett? Did I get your name right? Did I?"

"Oh finally," Oleander said, shoulders slumping in relief as he approached them. "Took you guys long enough to get here."

"We're here on an assignment from Truman," Otto said, nodding toward Terryl.

She beamed in excitement. "That's right! Agent Oleander was just telling me about that!"

"I was trying to..."

"Yes," Raz put in, holding up a finger as he approached the desk. "We just need to put Doctor Loboto here in a chamber overnight. Can you do that?"

"Not a problem! I just need some forms filled out." With that, she heaved a weighty stack of papers onto the desk.

"Uh—"

"Oh, I'll handle this," Otto said, quickly trading Loboto off to Oleander again and approaching the desk. "You two take him up to his room and let me know what happens."

Oleander glanced from Loboto to Terryl. "Yeah, but which—"

"Oh, it'll just be room two. One still needs to get cleaned out." Terryl waved them off and turned her attention back to Otto. "So Agent Mentallis, have you got any new inventions brewing?"

"Well, I—"

"Oh I just love that mental cobweb one, haha! Though I don't think I'd ever need to use it on myself!"

Leaving Otto to his fate, Raz and Oleander sneaked over to the levitation funnel, letting the Thinkerprint run its scan before they slipped inside with Loboto. "Geez, I thought we'd never get out of there," Oleander said, heaving a sigh of relief as Raz punched the button for room two.

Once they reached their destination, Loboto frowned down at the funnel. "My old elevator was much more efficient than these..."

"Pshaw." Oleander eyed Loboto askance. "The weirdo you had running that thing only let you up."

"Exactly!"

While Oleander and Loboto bickered, Raz approached the psychoisolation room before them, staring through the transparent walls. Unlike the one Compton had stayed in, which seemed cluttered and personalized, this one was a lot simpler. At one end sat a desk and a chair with paper and pens, and opposite of that was a twin bed. Just across from the door to the chamber was a bookshelf lined with a variety of psychic-related books and what looked like a stack of out-of-date magazines. In front of that was a flower-pattern bean bag chair. "Huh, looks cozy," Raz remarked.

"Could use a dentist chair and a... sink..." Loboto trailed off, his gaze drifting up above the chamber, then below it.

"What's eatin' you?" Oleander asked, raising an eyebrow. Both he and Raz followed the doctor's gaze, seeing the clusters of yellow psychoreactive crystals above and below the chamber. "What, scared of a little psilirium? You sure weren't before, back at the Rhombus."

"I'm not scared!" Loboto snarled, head snapping over in the Coach's direction. "Just not impressed with its lack of basic dental facilities!"

He didn't have his psychic powers before, Raz said telepathically. Also I... I think they used it on him when they... um... operated.

Oleander's mocking attitude quickly faded. Oh.

"I told you before, it'll be okay, Loboto," Raz said, giving what he hoped looked like an encouraging smile. "This stuff won't hurt you."

"I'm sure!" Loboto cried, kicking his feet in the air. Oleander had to hold him further away to avoid getting kicked in the face. "Just like what that green man put me through!"

"Eh, Nein's got some questionable methods," Oleander countered, "but Razputin's right. These psychoisolation chambers are fine, if a bit dull. I committed myself in one of these for a few hours once."

"Wait, really?" Raz turned to look at the Coach, brows raised.

"Vodello convinced me to try meditating in one once. I uh... fell asleep." Oleander scratched the back of his head. "Feels weird bein' in 'em, since you can't use your powers, but it's peaceful enough, I guess. Anyway, let's get you in here and go home."

Before Raz could ask how to get into the chamber, Oleander approached the door and placed a hand to his temple. Something within the door gave a quiet bleep, and it swung open. "All right, tall guy," he said, pulling Loboto feet-first into the short tunnel leading up to the door. "In you g—"

Loboto braced his feet against either side of the doorway.

"Oh come on!"

"No!" Loboto cried. His legs strained as Oleander tried to pull him into the chamber via telekinesis. "I'm not going in there! I've had enough!"

Oleander grit his teeth, only for his mouth to quirk in a strained smile. "All right, fine, have it your way." With that, he eased Loboto backwards out of the entryway... only to spin him around to attempt to shove him through the door headfirst.

Loboto kicked him square in the head, sending his helmet flying.

"AGH!"

"You know the orderlies did eventually give up trying to keep me in solitary," Loboto said matter-of-factly while Oleander rubbed his head. "I can keep this up far longer than you can!"

"You oversized toothpick! I'm gonna—"

"Coach, stop!" Raz got between the two of them, for all the good it would do. He took a quick glance back at Loboto to make sure he wouldn’t kick him in the head as well. "I don't think this is helping."

Oleander raised a brow at him as he reached down to pick up his helmet. "You got any better ideas, soldier?"

Biting his lip, Raz turned around to face the doctor. "...Doctor Loboto," he said slowly, "I know you don't have a lot of reasons to trust us. I know it... hasn't been fun for you here."

"Not for any of us, either," Oleander muttered.

"To say the least!" Loboto shot back.

Raz ignored the comments. "But... can you at least trust me?"

The request caught Loboto off-guard. His optics flicked from Raz, to Oleander, and back, and he let out an uncertain grumble before looking away.

Hesitantly Raz reached out, and took Loboto's hand.

The doctor gave a body-wide jerk, swinging his head over to glare down at Raz. He struggled to pull his hand away (not an easy task with his arms pinned to his side), but stopped. Slowly his gaze turned to his hand, then back to Raz, who kept a firm but gentle grip. The lights in his eyes flicked once in a blink.

"Please," Raz urged. "Just this once."

Loboto looked down at the floor, and remained silent.

Look, soldier, I don't think this is gonna work, Oleander said over telepathy, and Raz lowered his head. Give me a minute and I'll call for backup—

"Okay."

Wait what—

Raz's head snapped back up to find Loboto was looking at him again. "You—?"

"I said okay!" Loboto snapped. "You need a signed form or something?"

"I—no! No, that's fine!" Glancing back at Oleander, Raz found him just as surprised. "I guess, uh..." Strangely, he found himself smiling up at the doctor. "...Thanks."

Loboto's eyes flicked over to his right. "Hurry up before I change my mind."

"Welp, you heard the man," Oleander said, preparing to move him via TK again, but Raz held up a hand. "Huh?"

"No, Coach... Could you let him go?"

"Are you kidding me?!" the Coach cried. He looked down at Raz, who maintained eye contact with him, and sighed. "All right..." He heaved a sigh, then pointed a threatening finger at Loboto. "If you try anything funny, I'll send you sailing into the wall like I did earlier."

"That won't be easy for me. I have quite the sense of humor, you know!"

"Rrgh..."

Slowly Oleander lowered Loboto until his feet touched the ground, and released him from his telekinetic grip. Raz, meanwhile, kept hold of his hand.

"Ready?" Raz asked, giving him a gentle tug toward the entryway.

"Not really, but it's not like you give me much of a choice." Loboto's brow furrowed, but he hesitantly allowed Raz to lead him toward the psychoisolation room. He had to duck to get through the entryway, and stopped just before the door. His breathing had quickened.

Raz squeezed his hand, and led him into the chamber.

The world fell silent.

Raz let out a gasp, and Loboto started as well, looking around the chamber and down at himself. But no, he could hear the sound of his own breathing and the tapping of Loboto’s boots against the floor. He hadn't lost his hearing—he'd lost his sixth sense.

He hadn't realized how many voices he'd learned to tune out until they were suddenly gone.

Otherwise, though, he felt fine—like he could still run and jump his way through the quarry, albeit without levitation. He shook his head. "Sorry, that just startled me, is all. How are you feeling, Doctor Loboto?"

"Uh... okay..." He gingerly brought his claw up to his shower cap. "I think...?"

"It does feel a little weird at first, but... see? We're both fine!"

"I suppose so." Loboto looked down, saw Raz was still holding his hand, and roughly yanked it away. "Enough of that!"

"Right, sorry." With that, Raz backed away toward the door. "Well... goodnight, Doctor Loboto."

Loboto looked away, muttering something that may have been "goodnight” before his optics turned back to focus on him intently. He took a step toward him, looking like he was about to reach out with his prosthetic.

"Uh... See you tomorr—woah!"

Raz was yanked backward out of the chamber, and the door slammed behind him. All at once his psychic senses came back, leaving his head swimming, and he was pretty sure he briefly saw figments. When his vision returned to normal, he found the Coach glaring through the slot in the door. "Hey," Raz protested, "what was that—"

Oleander whipped back around to face him, his face red. "What were you doing, Raz?!" he hissed, and Raz took a step back in surprise. After casting a quick glance back at the chamber behind him, the Coach hurried out of the entryway tunnel.

Brow furrowed, Raz followed him out. "I was getting him into the chamber! What do you think I—"

"You got the both of you into that chamber!" Oleander whispered harshly, pointing an accusing finger in Raz's face. Before Raz could protest, he went on, "He doesn't have his psychic powers in there, but neither do you! Who do you think's gonna win in a fight between you and a nine-foot-tall criminal, huh?"

Raz felt the blood drain from his face as he envisioned the claw that had reached toward him, and his stomach fell. "Oh... oh, man, I didn't even think..."

"I told you, he's unpredictable! You could've—!" Oleander cut himself off, and sighed, the proper color finally returning to his face. He dragged his hand over it.

Raz's gaze drifted to the floor. "Sorry, Coach," he said, his voice catching.

"Ugh. I'm sorry too, soldier. You just... scared me for a minute there." Looking back up, Raz found Oleander eyeing Loboto through the transparent walls. "Y’know, there's a reason I..." He trailed off.

"...A reason you what, sir?" Raz asked, swallowing.

The Coach gave a start. "Nothing, it's... nothing. C'mon, let's get you out of here."

Raz followed Oleander back to the levitation funnel, but looked back into the chamber just before they descended.

Loboto stared back, red-and-green eyes piercing into his own.

—~~~—

Raz wrapped his arms around himself as he hopped out of the Otto B.O.N. He'd parted ways with Oleander and Otto, but the Coach's words were still ringing in his head.

He knew Loboto was unpredictable. Even before Oleander had said it, he'd known. He'd seen what had happened in the Rhombus, when Loboto had gone from freeing everyone one moment to blowing up the place the next. And even hours ago, he'd just been helping Loboto's inner child, only for the doctor to use his newfound psychic abilities against him. Raz had his own psychic powers though, too, and if worse came to worst, he probably could've held his own against Loboto. But... in the psychoisolation chamber...

Who do you think's gonna win in a fight between you and a nine-foot-tall criminal, huh?

Loboto wouldn't... really hurt him now, would he? After all that had happened?

As he returned to the caravan and his mom chided him for coming home so late (but handed him the leftovers she'd set aside for him), he found his thoughts still drifting back to the mission.

No, Loboto couldn't be completely unpredictable. There had to be a reason for the way he acted.

He'd just have to find it.

Upon finishing dinner, Raz felt like he had weights tied to his limbs. He somehow managed to stumble off to bed, finally managing to relax among the familiar smells and sounds of his home, grateful to have somewhere safe to return to after a long day. But as he settled into his blankets, a thought crossed his mind:

Where did Loboto have to return to?

#caligosto loboto #razputin aquato #morceau oleander #otto mentallis #psychonauts #psychonauts 2 #truman zanotto #sasha nein #milla vodello #my art #my writing #fanfic #psychics ruin everything

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thatonecrookedsmile · 5 months

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*kicks the front door with all the strength I have*

WAKE UP, CHILDREN. I HAVE SOMETHING FOR YOU TO PLAY WITH.

Hey there IRIS fans. It's been a while. More than 3 months to be exact. I came once again to offer you my gifts. Behold…..breadcrumbs! :D

Yeah, that's all I have at the moment. I'm sorry.

I was reflecting on the idea of posting things that are more....small? Don't just post finished drawings. Maybe WIPs or, sketches, or in the case above, a doodle! Basically, I don't need to ONLY post finished drawings. Or drawings. Sometimes I can just. Post words, you know. I had the realization about this a while ago when I remembered that I'm on Tumblr. I can post (almost) anything here without limiting myself. Now, will I fulfill this? I don't know. Maybe I'll do that, or I'll just post it when I have a drawing ready to post. I don't promise anything lol.

Anyway, IRIS! I made this little doodle of Goliath while I was out of the house. I only drew his Pre-Explosion version once and it was in that Transmission 3 drawing. As a joke too. So I tried to do something a little more serious. This time…he has a face! I thought it turned out good. I think I found a good way to do his hair too. I decided to color it (and do a light digital lineart over it) to make it more pleasant. Simple, but it looks nice! (I'll leave the normal scribble unedited at the end of the post) Also, I know that in the only art we have of P.E Goliath it doesn't show him with irises and pupils in his eyes. I drew them here because I thought it would be cool.

Next stop is to practice drawing his body. I have to learn how to draw more muscular bodies. Goliath has to live up to his name (and he deserves the muscles tbh)

It goes without saying that I did this after watching the new chapters of Story of Vegala. And speaking of that: i'm gonna be honest with you: I think this is my favorite part of the IRIS story/lore drops posted so far.

It's quite intriguing to see the very story that happened before everything we've seen so far. It's also nice to receive what I've wanted for a while: Tyrant and Fate Lore. It's good to have more information about two characters that we've known (more or less) for a long time now. Especially their origins (broader origins than just *the first beings that walked the Earth* or *beings that came from distant worlds in search of the emblem*)

SOV also makes me excited for other things. Like, obviously, HOAA:R. Releasing soon! December is knocking on the door, you know. But I also really want to see Jaws of Vegala now. And whatever happens in the story that takes place after GT.

So again, SOV is currently my favorite part of the lore, I believe. The anguish of waiting for the next episodes this past week was real.

I'm talking too much once again, SHIT. Yeah, Pre-Explosion Goliath. He deserves the world (He's NOT a monster, he's just BIG and STRONG, and needs a functioning family *cries*)

I don't know when I'll do my next Big Piece related to IRIS. I had something in mind but I lost the will. But I was thinking about doing something related to Solitude for a while. Hold this thought,then. Until then, I'll sketch Tyrant next. Because I like his official design.

Also, here is the unedited scribble:

#iris official #pre-explosion goliath #goliath iris #will ryan originals #heart of an artist: resurrection #iris: story of vegala #heart of an artist #dagames #crookedsmileart #once again apologizing for writing the next chapter of the bible in the desc #it will happen again #tempted to talk about IRIS here because of the new chapters that were recently released #I have thoughts in my head #and I want to communicate with the community #the community is already very very small anyway #it doesn't hurt to try #Man; I can't wait for the epilogue #(This post is being posted after Chapter 10 was released and the epilogue hasn't come out yet)#(just contextualizing)

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fanaticastrid · 7 months

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Alright I apologize for lack of actual content minus reposts as of late, creative block sucks cuck. But I guess that gives me an excuse to share more of what I've cooked up for the Double Lester AU/The Son of the Priest!

-The books have their own titles in this to seperate them from the OG. A Fallen God's Plea, The Wrath of Neos Helios, Blood Moon Rising, and The Last Trial all correspond to, respectively, The Hidden Oracle, The Burning Maze, The Tyrant's Tomb, and The Tower of Nero. You may notice The Dark Prophecy isn't here, that's because I can't think of a good alternative title for the story told in the AU version, it might just stay the same idk yet.

-I'm aging up Meg just a little, to 14 from the start. I confess I do this because it's hard for me to keep Meg in character, so I'm going the cheap route to make her a bit more flexible to me. Don't fire me pls I'll try to keep her close to canon

-Nifty idea I had while doing my notes for Blood Moon Rising: Lester progressively becomes more ghostlike as Apollo's infection worsens (since the Body-Soul Link connects them.) At first, it just makes Lester's veins more purple and it more difficult not to break into his true aoroi self, but over time he simply can't go back into his human state and has to keep a tight handle on himself so as to not attack people. His aoroi appearance has a distinct violet tinge instead of pale blue, and the poison in him (well, more Apollo) shows as glowing lavender veins, much like if you injected glowstick fluid in your bloodstream. By the time we reach the end with Tarquin, Lester is struggling so badly not to give in to the violent urges, Tarquin's beckoning to join him, and the amount of pain he's in, but he pushes through everything knowing there's still that smallest chance of help... of hope.

-I AM SOOOO excited to get to Nero and Python. Netos death won't be so anticlimatic- if fact he goes out with a bang- and Python... well for one it's serious Lester abuse ouch, but it's the peak of Apollo and Lester's character arcs. Neither of them are afraid to face Python because they have each other and aren't alone. They aren't afraid to die, hell Lester just goes into Badass Mode the whole fight, a stark contrast to the wimpy coward we met at the very beginning of everything. He does everything he can to assist Apollo knowing damn well there is no chance of him surviving the battle. The lil fucker just refuses to die.

And that's before I get to Apollo. He feels horrible knowing Lester is almost guaranteed to die in Delphi, and he will not let him. He will do whatever it takes to save Lester from the fate Python bestowed on him, consequences be damned. He's willing to die for Lester, and Lester's willing to die for Apollo. That's what love does bby

-A snippet of the many abilities of the Body-Soul Link is that Lester, on a few occasions, can actually SORT OF see Apollo's true appearance. In reality he looks like a fuzzy, glowing gold 3D lineart and his face is really hard to make out, but Lester's Mist-piercing vision helps him a bit... and he gets flustered every time. "A-am I gay now?"

-also Lester, despite his temper, is such a sweetheart to everyone hnngh too precious. For one, he's such a big brother to Meg, he cried when Meg said she sees him and Apollo as siblings. He gives back to the poor. He cares about nature. Fuck I can't wait to this precious little bean to yall aaaaaa

#lester papadopoulos #trials of apollo #alternate universe #double lester au #fan au #meg mccaffrey #lesterverse #my au ideas #my au

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inklessletter · 6 months

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✨️15 people 15 questions✨️

My lovely, lovely @mentallyundone tagged me. I think I already did this a few months ago, but I'll do it again. Miss you babe, thank you for the tag

1. Are you named after anyone?

No. I was supposed to be named Rocío, since my mom chose it and they had the agreement that if I was born female she would choose it, but my dad and godfather registered me as Vanesa because they saw it in a store and sounded good. This is the official story, and i know this sounds terrible, but there's an emotional explanation to this. According to the doctors, I wasn't supposed to survive. I was born very ill, and they told my parents that I wasn't going to make it. My dad registered me with another name so my mom's favorite girl's name wouldn't be attached to bad memories. Funny thing is, I'm an only child, and Rocío is a name that got eventually unused. My mom have been years telling this story saying that this is a reason for divorce, but only a few years ago my dad told why he did it. She doesn't think is a reason to divorce anymore.

2. when was the last time you cried?

Strictly speaking, November 4th. I saw a show that made me sob like a little child. If the question goes for when was the last time I cried in a bad way, I'm happy to say that I don't remember when it was the last time. I've cried a lot for bad reasons, but I can't recall when it was the last one. I've been crying more lately for good reasons than bad.

3. do you have kids?

Not yet. I want to, though, in an immediate future, but I'm scared shitless about this. I'd love to adopt a kid, though.

4. what sports do you/have you play/played?

Badminton, Karate and flamenco dance. I love to dance.

5. do you use sarcasm?

Not enough.

6. whats the first thing you notice about people?

I don't really know, it depends on the day. Sometimes I see physical traits, some days I get the vibes in general. I guess that overall the first thing I notice is if they give me good vibes.

7. whats your eye color?

Green-ish. I mean, it's a blend of blue, green and golden. For some reason they look deep blue when I'm at the beach or in sunny places.

8. scary movies or happy endings?

Yes (scary movies can have happy endings!!!!) Don't really understand this question.

9. any talents?

No, not really. What I do best is the result of hard work and practice, but I don't think 'talent' is a word for it.

10. where were you born?

Málaga, Spain.

11. what are your hobbies?

Reading, drawing, music. Binging series and films. For something different I'll say that I do love going to the theatre to watch musicals and plays. My favorites so far are The Lion King and Les Mis.

12. do you have any pets?

Yes!!! My lazy ass, half devilisy 60 pound dog, Appa. Named after the flying bison, of course

13. how tall are you?

5'1. Small one here.

14. favorite subject in school?

Art, English and Literature. In that order.

15. dream job?

I'd love to make a living out of my art. Working from home, or maybe doing some studies to become a tattoo artist. I think I would be an amazing tattoo artist, I love linearts. But when I was a kid, my dream job was (wait for it) librarian.

I am not tagging anyone in particular, this is an open invitation for anyone who wants to do this and share a bit about themselves.

I hope you have a great day!! (And thank you if you read this til the very end!)

#inklessletter #tag game

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bishicat · 7 months

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Get To Know Me ✨

Thank you so much for the tag @seeker-of-truth <333!!!!!!

Favourite colour:

powder blue (I've always loved blue but this specific shade is totally not cause of a certain solavellan fanfic....)

Currently reading:

two books actually, Blood & Honey by Shelby Mahurin and Pandora by Susan Stokes-Chapman (and they've both been sitting on my bookshelf rotting away)

Last song:

I'm Your Man by Mitski -> guys when the dogs start BARKING I almost cried on the bus istg

Last movie:

Talk to Me (2022) -> this movie was actually genuinely freaky! I'm kind of a horror junkie and this scratched all the itches

Last series:

Alice in Borderland (the first season was INSANELY good)

Sweet, Spicy, or Savoury?:

can I pick all three? A combination perhaps? Hmmm I can't live without savoury food so...

Craving:

donairs — specifically one with maple syrup, peppers and beef ughhhhhghghhh

Tea or Coffee?:

it depends, if it's hot then coffee but if the drink is chilled then I would prefer tea (milk tea).

Currently Working On:

artistically, I'm working on this River Ward sketch study dump but I'm not super happy with the colours so I might just post the lineart one of these days

academically, I've got a couple assignments due in a few days and I'm procrastinating (ಥ◡ಥ)

No pressure tagging these lovely folks @sacrecoeur-art @wistereia @totentnz @seraphfighter @housevael and anyone else that would like to share a few things! <3

#tag games #bishi talks #thank you for the tag!!!!

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wimblton475 · 4 months

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HELLO??? YOUR ART?!?!?!!,?.? P R E C I O U S ?!?!?,

WHAT IF I CRIED-

TY TY SOSOSOSO MUCH YOUR ASK MADE MY DAY!!! ALSO I JUST LOOKED AT UR ART AND !!!!!!! SO COOL !!!!!! LOVE UR SCAR FINALE ART IT MAKES ME FERAL AND YOUR WAY OF DRAWING HANDS MAKES ME AIDBAIOMANQOKSODLANA

ALSO UR ETHO????? WHUH???? COOL????? AMIRIGHT????

ALSL THE HOOD ON UR PEARL LOOKS SO GOOD HOODS R SO HARD I RLLY APRECIATE A GOOD HOOD

also off topic but ur lineart is so cool like- it’s epic what brush do u use

#wimbl rambls #wimbl ask #Aaaaaahhh ty so much !!!

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foxounderscorecube · 3 months

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Had a go at using the watercolour feature of watercolour pencils for the first time in years and years in a colouring book I have. It's not amazing, but came out better than anticipated, so I'm posting it. I tend to neglect traditional media now so colouring books are a good way to make sure I don't totally forget how it works!

The lineart is by Cris Ortega in Colouring Heaven: Fantasy Kingdom

#My art #(ish)#Also not my art #Wish the lighting in this house was better but alas

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sesamenom · 9 months

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Fifteen Questions for Fifteen Mutuals

@actual-bill-potts Thanks for tagging me, and sorry it took so long for me to answer!

Are you named after anyone? My first name is inspired by a well-known movie character, but it’s also a somewhat normal name so it’s not really obvious

Do you use sarcasm a lot? Not on purpose, but sometimes people interpret comments that way since i’m not really good at tone/expressions

When was the last time you cried? about a week ago

What's the first thing you notice about other people? Physically - defining features like hair/eyes/height. Personality-wise - depends on the person, but usually something related to how they interact with people

What sports do you/have played? I play badminton once in a while, but nothing regularly

Eye color? dark brown

Any special talent? I can whistle this one specific bird sound that makes the local birds not run away when I approach.

Scary movies or happy endings? I don’t watch movies, but books wise I’m going with dramatic ending

Do you have any pets? Not anymore :(

What are your hobbies? Reading (mostly Silm/BoLT currently, but I tend to like fantasy & sci fi in general), drawing, needle felting occasionally

Favorite subject in school? science/biology, specifically microbiology and genetics

Dream job? Realistically, successful dentist (probably general) Idealistically, c. elegans dauer diapause research

(I don’t usually answer questions related to real life identifying features online, so here’s some alternative questions to get to 15 total questions if that’s ok!)

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Something you collect? fun keychains

Analog or digital clocks? analog

Random superstition/habit? i always do lineart on the 5th layer regardless of total layer count

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Tagging @sakasakiii, @leucisticpuffin, @mahtaniel, @caenith, @mirillel (no pressure, sorry if you’ve already done this!)

#not silm #not art #tag game #hm. this ended up being 12 questions for 5 mutuals #sorry i don't interact with a ton of people and i feel like i just tagged you guys in the last tag game #oh well #if you want to do this feel free to say i tagged you #sorry this took me so long to do tumblr has been really buggy lately

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bonefall · 1 year

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Your art is so gorgeous i wish i was good with color palettes like that *cries in forest cat corner

Pfff! The way I pick color is super easy and lazy, you can learn to do it too anon I promise.

Just don't "max out" the color you're picking. Like, if you're picking red, don't go ALLL the way to the bright corner. Go a little midway over the palette and pick a color there to start with.

Also, when you're shading, don't shade with a darker version of the main color. That's just another version of 'shading with black.' Try going around the color wheel to shade instead-- for example, if you're going to shade yellow, use orange. If you're going to shade orange, use purple.

And coloring the lineart is ridiculously overpowered. You can watch a sketch go from 0 to 100 by adjusting the color of the lines.

Just play around with it! Have fun! My art suddenly got a lot more fun and bright when I stopped being sooo concerned about perfect colors and clean lines. Use lots of layers and try lots of stuff, and don't spend too long fixing one thing that bothers you. Move onto the parts that spark joy.

#I used to do clean lines on all of my art but I stopped because I hated outlining #So I simply do not do clean lines anymore LMAO #I am flattered that you think my art is gorgeous though because I feel like at this point I'm just Doing Stuff #I stopped putting like... EFFORT into my drawings because it was sucking the fun out so I'm glad it's liked in spite of that #But that just goes to show you that what's really important is that you HAD FUN making it!#Suffering is not a virtue; it doesn't shine like gold flecks on the canvas #Just make designs for characters you'd like to see and use colors you like looking at #art #Bone Babble #I do sit on some neat art tutorials though for when I do want to portray something #And I'm surrounded by really cool artists I happily pester for art advice #You'll get great with color palettes anon! If you'd like to be! Just practice and play around!

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momolith · 10 months

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Happy to report that I’ve fallen back into bingliu brainrot thanks to you, feeling blessed on this Sunday afternoon 🙏🏼 everything you draw is so beautiful??? I really like how you express emotion on your art and how your librarte always looks very clean

good... very good... 😏

thank uuuu .. cries... *my autistic ass struggling to convey emotion* also did u mean lineart?

#asks

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konveeart · 2 years

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{2022生2月} February Screenshots // Spirit & Strife Zine

I watched Advent Children 5 times between end 2021- beginning 2022 and practiced on his outfit before finally deciding to draw CC Cloud instead. I usually tackle full-bodies for zines, it was a pleasant change to paint a portrait for once~

These are wip-screenshots from both painting and standee I designed (I think they look really cool, I’m happy to share hehe)! This standee is the first piece of merchandise I ever made and it holds a very special place in my heart! Thank you very much for the opportunity ♥ !!

I am currently uploading the timelapse of the painting and I should get to uploading the standee BTS once my package arrives *crosses fingers!* I’ve been keeping for so long, but I’d love to have the entire experience of traditonal-to-digital-to-final_product in one video so I’ll hold for as long as it needs..! ☆ UPDATE FURTHER DOWN, the video is mADE!!

youtube

As a surprise for being here, here’s the little eerie edit I ended up inserting in the timelapse as an add-on

I had 2 files corrupted while working on this. I don’t remember what happened anymore (let me check discord).

right

I don’t remember mentioning if I lost any work, but I will assume I lost a couple of hours (+2hrs of trying to restart my pc and make it work again 💀).. Gladly this time there was a very pleasant recovery file which I duplicated and feared every time I saved in PS //cries

Unfortunately file corruptions occur more often now, that's my signal that my poor pc needs an upgrade (who can afford one in this economy??? Prolong the lives of your machines, friends!). I'll live in fear and 5 backup files until I decide my hardware hates anything above 5000px+ files and I go smaller (which is not happening, sorry friend, we'll have to keep being fried a little longer.. hang in there..)

[9月2日Update] I have uploaded the second (and final) timelapse with a little assembly video at the end and some extras~

youtube

I have the habbit of working at least x2 bigger in file than what goes into print. First lesson learned was this is unnecessary in merch-making of small sizes (I actually worked x3~4 times bigger and it shows in the video why it was a bad idea //wheeze) especially since my lineart is very thin and it gets lost if shrinked. I’ve watched so many merch-making vlogs in the past years, print-test got drilled in my brain and forced myself to test it at least once (gotta be professional about it, right? ;3) It wasn’t too early on, but it was early enough to change the composition of the piece as it set realistic expectations to what would work out or not (the size was so important, I hadn’t realised it would shrink so much because I obviously read very well and was fully aware of the OG size provided by the lovely mods). From the original design to the final I made a lot of changes and I was too obsessed with the meteor to let go. I cut at least 5mins (already sped-up) of me trying to lineart it and failing miserably so I switched back to PS and did it there. I cannot watch my own timelapse anymore without feeling dread and bored lmao, my convolution makes my skin crawl, so meticulous.. If it’s interesting to anyone I’ll be happy, if not then I am not surprised, I am not either! It made a beautiful base regardless, so it was worth it~ On a final note, no I did not 100% forget what kind of idea I had for the flaming buster sword (the meteor was supposed to reflect-in-tiny over it) and completely ignored my initial sketch to polish something I wasn’t sure what it was. It works out in the end so we’re good ok.

If there’s one thing I am taking from working on this is; don’t experiment when merch-making, it will make your life so much easier to stick to a process but knowing myself this is not happening. It’s just not me lol //runs

I am in denial that the zine is finally wrapping up.. It’s been such a wonderful experience sharing the Cloud love between us (for ~7 months?? time flies ;;;;;;!!) //is emotional.. I am very grateful and honoured to be part of this wonderful project ♥ thank you everyone for your lovely company during this time ;; I will always hold our little chit-chats and cloud-love-sharing dearly in my heart. Mod team, you are STELLAR and I hope one day our roads cross again💫!! ---

Thank you for making it this far 🌦️

Leftover sales will be up soon, so follow @strifezine // Spirit & Strife zine as it’s your last chance of grabbing a copy or merch item if you missed out on the first round!

#digjsketch #digisketch #digitalsketch #screenshotception #screenshotbsession #myart #ffvii #ffviicc #ff7cc #crisis core cloud #cloud strife

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choccymilllk · 1 year

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Hey what if I told you that your art is really good and the lineart is expressive and nice and the way you blend colors especially in sunny outside setting is fucking marvelous and not only that but you're also one of the funniest mfs on the planet. What then

WHAT IF I RAN TOWARDS U AT FULL SPEED AND HUGGED YOU??? WHAT THEN.!!💥💥💥💥💥