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#like there's such a genuine excitement to share the culture with someone who is effectively a blank slate
hella1975 · 8 months
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all hate to tiktok for taking 'having a space to more openly and actively talk about different cultures' to mean 'cultures are NOT to be shared and we must be vigilantly defensive of our cultures for fear of appropriation, a word that can be applied to any multicultural interaction'. like of course cultural appropriation is a very real problem but ive seen with the access to global multicultural conversation that tiktok provides it's made people TERRIFIED to even interact with cultures other than their own for fear of 'doing it wrong'. like at some point you have to acknowledge that in the real world of the great outdoors, the majority of people are eager to SHARE their cultures. yes there are ignorant questions and biases but also... how do you think those things get unlearnt? i dont understand how deciding that multiculturalism is an elephant in the room instead of a normal thing that should just be talked about and lived with is supposed to benefit anyone? and kids on tiktok are CONVINCED that it's a time bomb of a conversation to have and therefore must be avoided at all costs but like. people generally LOVE their home and their culture and are PROUD of it and want to share it. how have we made it so that showing genuine interest and a desire to understand something so integral to a person's identity is now feared and borderline demonised?
#thinking about this a lot lately. thinking about how fun it was comparing cultural differences in america#thinking of how when i was homesick one thing i found a great comfort in was talking about my home#and how it differed and i really loved and appreciated it when people would ask me about england#in a way that they genuinely just wanted to learn about it and not to take the piss#thinking about how the kitchen at work has chefs from all over europe. we have an irish chef and a spanish chef and an italian chef#and one of the kps is from eastern europe (i havent actually been able to find out where yet) etc and the way they banter with each other#like usually chefs are Problematic bc their humour is VERY abrasive and usually offensive#but this is one instance where it's actually to their benefit bc they're so unafraid to ADDRESS THE FACT THEY HAVE DIFFERENT CULTURES#i feel like the tiktok gen are so petrified of even acknowledging other cultures let alone discussing them#that it's actually sending the conversation backwards. like how does hoarding your culture and pretending it's not there benefit anyone#LET ALONE YOU AND THE CULTURE IN QUESTION. idk it just baffles me a bit that something that started as people on tiktok#genuinely spreading information and talking about the BAD side of this where people DO culturally appropriate or invade spaces that arent#theirs has now become 'for fear of speaking bad about it we will not speak about it at all'. and they'll crucify you if you do. like what#even at uni my best mate is indian and she's too scared to join the sikh society on her own so i regularly go to the events with her#and im typically one of the handful (or the only) white non-sikh there and i get SO welcomed each time#like there's such a genuine excitement to share the culture with someone who is effectively a blank slate#and like yeah ill ask 'dumb' questions or i'll have different experiences (tried a samosa for the first time at one of these events#and the moment that info got out i had like five STRANGERS trying to give me different samosas to try and it was genuinely such#a laugh bc yes they were TEASING me bc 'how have you never had one' but they were also really eager to share MORE as a result)#ugh idk what im saying. i just think it's a shame to watch this happen in real time on the internet#when if people would just go outside and actually TALK to people from other cultures they'd realise 9 times out of 10 the interactions#are actually really really nice for BOTH parties. and actually refusing to talk about this stuff is long-term pretty fucking detrimental#and it also goes the other way!!! like imagine if i - citizen of colonisation motherland herself - didn't interact with other cultures#and didnt ask questions or hear their opinions on whatever shared history we have from THEIR POINT OF VIEW#imagine the kind of shit id be internalising bc i only hung out with other white british people. it wouldnt matter if i was doing it#to be woke or 'respect their culture'. it would still be fucking ignorant. like half my interactions with other cultures#see me as the butt of the joke bc of this like aforementioned irish chef at work VOCALLY slates the english all the time#but it's done in an environment where we're FRIENDS and it's poking fun at each other while still addressing a very serious history. like??#idk if any of this is worded in a way that makes sense but yeah. i have thoughts#cant believe i got inspired to make an actually serious post bc of the CHEFS AT WORK. embarrassing. no one let them see this
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forumgamer · 8 months
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A Jane Austen moment
I am currently re-reading Northanger Abbey (not my favourite Austen, but also not my least - probably rank 3-4 I'd say), and I was struck with the realisation how ODD the notion of Catherine Morland's trip to Bath would be to many modern people.
Here is a young girl (17), going on a trip to Bath with a rich older couple that are neighbours to her parents - not as an au pair or governess or whatever, but as a guest and companion. Taken along to have fun, as a kind gesture of favour and goodwill. And they aren't even her godparents or relatives or something!
And I find that notion so very charming.
Catherine is not like poor Fanny Price, rather abused than cherished, used as an indispensable companion for a very silly and lazy lady (though Mrs Allen certainly has her share of silliness and indolence...). From how their relationship is presented, the Allens seem genuinely motivated by wanting her to enjoy herself. They don't mind her meeting new people and spending time with them, and she in turn refers to them when she is unsure about how to behave in this to her completely new and exciting world. And rich as they may be, they also seem to spare little expense in taking her to Bath and there to balls and plays.
We have today a weird aversion to inter-generational friendships, or so it seems to me. Yet when I was growing up, in a semi-detached suburban house, I was always welcome at our neighbours' house and table. Sure, mostly because they had a boy my age who quickly became my friend, but even now, when we have both moved out, I rarely visit my parents without also checking in with their neighbours, who are like an uncle and aunt to me.
And as for myself, I have no children of my own, and will never have any either. Yet working as a teacher, I get to interact with younger people on a daily basis, and you guys, young people can be amazing company. Sure, some of their concerns appear trivial to me, but I remember they weren't that way when I was their age - just as some of my views or hobbies might seem odd or boring to them, yet they also know I have seen more of the world than they, and apply to me for insights into issues that they feel unsure about.
And guys... I get it. I get what the Allens feel. I might still be a bit young to QUITE get it (I assume the Allens to be in their 50es or so, which I am not for another decade), but... imagine taking a seventeen-year old teenager, that has never been able to travel so far, to a prime holiday spot! Showing them Paris, London, Prague or Rome, seeing their amazement and delight, presenting them the art, cuisine, culture and pleasures of such an unfamiliar site... to find new enjoyment in these things yourself by witnessing their effect on someone younger and more excitable than yourself.
I doubt I will ever have the option to do so, because a) times have changed and b) if Mr Allen had been a bachelor/divorcee like me, the book's plot could not have happened back then either, but... I think I might like it. I really would.
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reilleclan-blog · 1 month
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Hot Takes
I really don't like when ppl record strangers and then post it for clicks and likes. Especially when said person is either on drugs or homeless.. or just out of it. It's really strange to just record that person, I've grew up in an area where ppl "tweakin"(yeah tweakin is being so high off some shit that ur body is spasming and or u possibly od. Ur not "tweakin" b/c a new product ur excited about finally dropped. Please stop using AAVE if u are not black and don't know the context of these words. It's not "genz" slang it's Ebonics. Or keep using the words and be fucking dense and inconsiderate cause "everyone else says it") and seeing someone be addicted to drugs is very scary thing to see cause there's not much help for them and most ppl don't have many other options, so ppl would rather take drugs.
Also I really don't find memes as funny anymore b/c most memes used is just a black person being black, or a black person's features being used as the joke. And when u call ppl out for it we are mostly gaslight and told "it's just a joke". I've also seen wayyy too many ppl use black ppl in PAIN as a running joke or a "haha funny" clip in a yt video. It's also just desensitizes Ppl even more when it comes to seeing Black ppl in pain or struggling. Even stuff from TikTok's sounds ppl use would be of someone having a mental break and then thousands off ppl will use the sounds being like it's "for the funnies" it's just weird to me.(there was an entire trend of ppl pretending to be shot, come to find out the guy who started the "trend" was genuinely sharing about the trauma he went thru and ppl took it as a joke. Also he was a black man)
The fact that media will include making the most ridiculous rap names like "big cheese" or "big killa bunny" or some shit makes me think it's supposed to be "funny" obviously. These rappers have the "goofiest" names so let's make them even goofier. The thing is AGAIN that is something from BLACK culture that hollywood wants to make fun of. Again denying black ppl's identities when all the name is is a "punchline" to how "silly black ppl name themselves". Even when black Americans had to reinvent themselves after slavery we decided to make up our own names like Daquan or Lashawnda and in school systems or any system really apparently those names are "too hard too pronounce" we had ideas to make our own names and a lot of the help of creating those came from, Arabic backgrounds and some Muslim links. A white person can name off 10 different dog breeds but can't fathom trying to understand a black person's name. We are seen as sub-human. Some ppl genuinely believe black ppl are a different species all together , it's pretty sad
Also has anyone actually seen a dead body in their lifetime. A dead body in front of their eyes? I haven't but I watched this young man spasming or "tweaking" on the train stop home. His body was laying vertically on the bench, as he "tweaked". And there was nothing I could do for me. There was an ambulance that came but who knows if he was alive or not. I later on had a panic attack and started hyperventilating cause I guess it got to me.(I have a issue knowing when my body is in stress or something effects me) but i think it triggered me so bad b/c I lost 2 of my cousins to gun violence and they were also heavily doing drugs. (Now that I think about it I wonder if anyone else would've pulled out their phone and started recording the kid. There was another lady that got off when we saw him on the bench, but her response was "I gotta get out the city"🤷🏽‍♂️) idfk
Idk I say all this to say I wish the world would change I wish ppl gave a fuck about anything. And I wish young black ppl didn't think their only way out of "this life" was doing drugs or having a baby for fulfillment or acceptance. I wish BLACK ROYALTY knew how special we are.
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digicamdiariesbynik · 2 months
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From Chaos to Collaboration: Finding Fulfillment at Work
I had the pleasure of listening to Cathy McKnight share her insights, experiences, and wisdom during a recent seminar. One of the themes she emphasized was the importance of leaning into opportunities and challenges. Cathy's journey, particularly her time at Parsons, taught her valuable lessons about the significance of listening and understanding the dynamics of the workplace. She stressed the importance of paying attention to the signs that indicate when it might be time for a change in career or job. According to Cathy, loving what you do and the people you work with, finding the work engaging and interesting, and having opportunities for growth can significantly impact both your personal and professional life. Her words resonate as a reminder to listen to our instincts and pursue paths that align with our passions and goals. Cathy's prompt to reflect on the impact of loving what you do and the people you work with resonates deeply with the fundamental elements of job satisfaction and workplace engagement. When individuals genuinely love their work and the people they work with, it creates a synergistic environment that fosters personal fulfillment and professional growth.
Firstly, loving what you do infuses your work with passion and purpose. When you're passionate about your role, tasks cease to feel like mundane obligations and instead become opportunities for creativity, innovation, and meaningful contribution. This enthusiasm not only drives productivity but also inspires others around you, creating a positive ripple effect throughout the organization.
I remember when I had my first out-of-university-job, I worked remotely and it was a relatively new company that mainly operated remotely, which was great since that was during the pandemic. So the company had like a lot of different sets of teams and with each team held like 6 employees and 1 manager, which wasn’t bad, but as someone who was new to the work industry it was quite confusing especially with different higher ups telling me different things and differing instructions especially on end of the day reports which kept changing almost every week, but I digress, at this time it was just really chaotic and all-over the place for me. So yeah definitely not the best experience I had.
Then the time came where the company I worked for decided to part ways, so what once was a semi large company, suddenly became a company with just 5 employees and 3 higher-ups. And I can say that despite the larger workload, working suddenly became fun and exciting. I got really close with everyone and communication was definitely easier since it was just a few of us. I definitely learned more since I had more additional tasks, but it was okay, since our managers were very hands-on and just easy-to-talk-too.
So yeah,  when you genuinely enjoy the company of your colleagues, work becomes more than just a series of tasks—it becomes a collaborative endeavor fueled by mutual respect, trust, and camaraderie.  Additionally, the size and culture of the organization play a significant role in shaping the work experience. The size of the organization can influence factors such as the level of bureaucracy, opportunities for advancement, and the overall sense of community.
Cathy spoke about the "art of the possible" and the power of saying "yes" to new challenges. After the pandemic, I embraced this mindset, pushing myself to participate in new experiences and opportunities for growth. This shift from complacency to seizing the moment reinforced the importance of embracing change and learning from new experiences.
Reflecting on the Girls Inc. Case Study, I learned the strategic importance of content marketing in creating connections and fostering engagement. This reaffirmed my interest in pursuing a career in content marketing, as it aligns with my passion for creativity and storytelling. However, I remain open to new opportunities and potential career shifts, recognizing the value of adaptability in personal and professional growth.
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taufiquehossain · 3 months
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How to Find Your Perfect Bride and Groom in Canada: The Ultimate Guide
With a diverse population, stunning landscapes, and a thriving culture, Canada offers endless opportunities to find love and companionship. Whether you're a Canadian resident or simply seeking a bride and groom in Canada, the search for love in this incredible country can be an exciting journey.
Online platforms and matrimony apps have made it easier than ever to connect with like-minded individuals who share your values and interests. These matrimonial platforms allow you to browse through countless profiles, filter your search based on specific criteria, and initiate conversations with potential matches – all from the comfort of your own home.
But why stop there? Artificial intelligence has taken the realm of matchmaking to new heights. AI-powered algorithms analyze vast amounts of data to identify compatible partners based on shared hobbies, interests, values, and goals. These intelligent systems not only save you precious time but also increase the chances of finding that special someone who truly understands you.
By seeking a bride and groom in Canada, you open yourself up to unique opportunities for personal growth and exploration. From vibrant cities like Toronto and Vancouver to breathtaking natural wonders such as Banff National Park or Niagara Falls – Canada offers an abundance of experiences that can be shared with your significant other.
The Power of Matrimonial Sites for Bride and Groom in Canada
Matrimonial sites have become immensely popular in Canada due to their ability to connect individuals from diverse backgrounds and communities. These platforms provide you with the opportunity to filter your search based on specific criteria such as age, religion, education, profession, and more. It allows you to narrow down your options and focus on those who align with your preferences.
Moreover, the best marriage media sites in Canada offer advanced features and algorithms that help identify potential matches based on compatibility factors like personality traits, interests, values, and goals. This data-driven approach increases the chances of finding someone who shares similar values and aspirations.
One of the critical advantages of online marriage site services is the convenience they offer. Gone are the days when you had to rely solely on traditional methods like family referrals or newspaper advertisements. With online platforms at your disposal 24/7, you have the flexibility to browse profiles at your own pace from anywhere at any time.
Additionally, marriage bureau websites prioritize user safety by implementing stringent verification processes that ensure genuine profiles are showcased. They also provide various communication tools, such as chat features or video calls, so that you can get to know each other before taking things further.
Qualities to Look for in a Bride and Groom in Canada
One of the critical traits of an ideal life partner is compatibility. Canadians believe in the importance of shared interests and goals, as well as having similar values and beliefs. It ensures a solid foundation for a successful and fulfilling partnership.
Moreover, the bride and groom in Canada prioritize communication and emotional intelligence in their relationships. They understand the significance of effective communication to resolve conflicts and maintain a strong connection.
In terms of values and beliefs, Canadians value equality, inclusivity, and tolerance. They embrace diversity in all its forms - be it cultural, religious, or social backgrounds - fostering an environment where differences are celebrated rather than judged.
The Importance of Cultural Compatibility: Navigating Interfaith Marriages
In today's interconnected world, multicultural relationships have become increasingly common, and Canada stands as a shining example of a diverse and inclusive society. Interfaith marriages, where individuals from different religious backgrounds come together in love and commitment, are a beautiful representation of this cultural mosaic. The key to success and harmony in such unions lies in understanding and embracing the concept of cultural compatibility.
Cultural compatibility refers to the ability of two individuals from different cultural backgrounds to understand, respect, and navigate each other's beliefs, values, traditions, and customs. It is an essential component that contributes to the strength and longevity of any relationship. In the context of interfaith marriages in Canada, cultural compatibility takes on even greater significance.
Canada prides itself on being a nation that celebrates diversity while fostering unity. With its multicultural fabric woven together by people from all walks of life, it provides an ideal environment for interfaith couples to thrive. By embracing each other's cultures and finding common ground within their differences, these couples can build solid foundations for their relationships.
Having a shared vision for their future is crucial for interfaith couples in Canada. Open communication about religious practices, expectations within the relationship, and how they plan to raise children can help bridge potential gaps caused by differing beliefs. It is essential to approach these conversations with empathy and respect for one another's perspectives.
Another aspect that contributes to cultural compatibility is mutual acceptance and celebration of each other's traditions. By actively participating in each other's religious ceremonies or festivities, couples can create meaningful connections with their partner's culture while enriching their own experiences.
Tips for Successful Online Profile Creation: Attracting the Right Match
Your matrimonial profile bio is your chance to make a lasting impression and spark curiosity. Let's explore some essential tips for crafting an attractive online profile that will captivate others and increase your chances of finding love.
Firstly, it's essential to be authentic and genuine in your bio. Showcasing your true personality and interests will help you attract like-minded individuals who appreciate you for who you are. Avoid exaggerating or pretending to be someone you're not, as this can lead to disappointment down the line.
Next, focus on highlighting your unique qualities and strengths. Think about what sets you apart from others and include these in your bio. Whether it's a particular hobby, a talent, or an exciting life experience, sharing these aspects will make you more intriguing to potential matches.
Additionally, don't shy away from injecting some humor into your bio. A well-placed joke or witty remark can instantly grab attention and show off your playful side. However, ensure that the humor aligns with your personality and doesn't come across as forced or offensive.
When it comes to describing yourself, use descriptive language that paints a vivid picture in the reader's mind. Instead of simply stating generic traits such as "kind" or "funny," provide specific examples or anecdotes that illustrate these qualities.
Furthermore, don't forget to include what you are looking for in a partner. Be clear about the type of relationship you seek and any specific qualities or values that are important to you. It will help filter out incompatible matches early on while attracting those who align with your desires.
The Meet-Up Stage: Planning Successful Meetings with Prospects
In the digital age, where virtual communication is prevalent, the question of determining compatibility through face-to-face meetings has become increasingly relevant. While technology has made it easier to connect with potential partners from the comfort of our own homes, there is still something undeniably special about meeting someone in person.
Face-to-face meetings offer a unique opportunity to gauge compatibility on a deeper level truly. In these encounters, we can observe body language, hear tone of voice, and see facial expressions - all essential elements that contribute to effective communication and understanding. These non-verbal cues often reveal more about a person's true character than any text message or video call ever could.
Furthermore, face-to-face meetings provide an authentic experience that cannot be replicated through a screen. The energy and chemistry that can be felt in real-life interactions are invaluable when it comes to determining compatibility. It allows us to assess whether there is a genuine connection between two individuals or if it was merely an illusion created by digital communication.
Additionally, face-to-face meetings allow for spontaneity and serendipity. The unexpected moments of laughter or shared interests during a date can often lead to deeper connections that may have been missed in an online setting. These personal interactions foster trust and intimacy at a much faster pace than virtual conversations alone.
Maintaining a Healthy Long-Distance Relationship: Tips and Advice
One key aspect of managing a long-distance relationship is maintaining regular communication. Thanks to various messaging apps, video calling platforms, and social media platforms, staying connected has never been more convenient. Regular communication not only keeps you updated on each other's lives but also helps strengthen the emotional bond between partners. Sharing daily experiences, discussing plans, or simply engaging in light-hearted conversations can make both individuals feel closer despite being physically apart.
Building trust is another crucial element in managing a long-distance relationship effectively. Trust forms the foundation of any successful partnership and becomes even more vital when distance is involved. Open and honest communication plays a significant role in cultivating trust between partners. Sharing fears, insecurities, and concerns ensures that both individuals are on the same page emotionally. Additionally, being reliable and following through on commitments demonstrates your commitment to the relationship.
In addition to effective communication and building trust, it's essential to find creative ways to stay connected despite the physical distance. Planning virtual dates or surprise visits can bring excitement into your relationship while also fostering a sense of anticipation for future reunions. Sending thoughtful gifts or handwritten letters shows your partner that they are always on your mind.
While managing a long-distance relationship may have its challenges, leveraging technology effectively allows us to bridge the gap and maintain strong connections with our loved ones regardless of geographical barriers. By prioritizing regular communication, building trust through open dialogue, and finding unique ways to stay connected emotionally, we can ensure that our long-distance relationships remain fulfilling and resilient over time.
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heyriceball · 3 months
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My thoughts on a peer's sobriety
“I don’t know why you need to shit on everything I like, maybe you just do it because you're insecure. When everything you like is the stupidest shit.”
This isn’t an exact quote. I’m paraphrasing here, of course. 
With the way my brain is organized I struggle to find the exact words or exact phrases someone said to me with any kind of accuracy. But I still understand what they meant. At least, I think I do.
That is to say, when I heard these words, and reflected on what I had said to prompt them, my immediate reaction was one of trepidation and resignation.
I needed to think, to ponder, as I always do when I am told something like this.
I know I can be overly critical, indeed I can be a harsher critic than even I could personally handle. This is probably something that I need to work on, especially if I am to be the kind of person I aspire to be. A person of kindness and compassion.
I had been asked to read a passage of prose written by someone who had recently given up alcohol for one year. The person in question was a dear friend to my partner, who had been the one to show me the post and she asked me my genuine thoughts on it. Of course, being so literal minded I pored over the text and immediately shared my thoughts.
It was a good message, one of personal vindication and self improvement, however one that I found to be self indulgent and quite honestly shallow, especially for the flowery language and judgemental tone. My thoughts were too nuanced to state in person and came across as crass and rude. So here I try to elucidate them.
Here is a man who has found the health benefits of abstinence and was excited to write about them in a self congratulatory way. Read in a certain way you could say he was looking down upon the plebian caste, demonizing the dark spirit of Al Ghul. Without further examination of the effects and reasons for a widespread substance problem within the general populace. Bereft of explanation or reference to the sociological and political influences that have caused such a dependance on depressant addiction within society. Ironically enough the text even makes mention of the traditional and homemade spirits found with steppe society (of which he even partook in the consumption of during this year of sobriety), which have major cultural roles for peoples within what I consider my home region of the world.
Deriding obese individuals in their middle age for having beer guts and blaming men for drinking alcohol to escape consequences of enacting sexual assault, I cant help but conjure a strange feeling that this is a man who believes that he is above the vice of alcohol and above the actions of fellow human beings. A message is being alluded to, that those who partake in drinking are doing so in a way that lessens themselves.
I feel it is a little bit misguided, even if it is honest and sincere, even if this malice I am projecting is but a reflection of his own relationship with alcohol or even my relationship with the thoughts of others.
With that being said; there is no harm in the exercise of writing these words.
As even the author prefaces the text with a note. He states, in quite a self aware way, that this writing was for himself, that if someone else can find enjoyment out of it then that is only an added bonus. Something within the words resonated with me deeply.
What I saw as a clumsy mess of unfocused intent and flowery prose was nonetheless inspiring.
By the way he so readily understood what he was writing for and how the language he used, in its meandering and ponderous tone, was primarily an exercise in personal satisfaction. 
Projectile vomited onto a page were numerous scenarios, memories of happiness, all with the throughline about how they were framed by sobriety. Unlike an exercise in satisfying the needs of a client or the sensibilities of an audience. The experience of creating something so personal, of reflecting oneself onto the page, must have carried an ambrosial quality. 
I was inspired in such a way that I seek to replicate it here, for my own satisfaction. 
Perhaps to create something meaningful is to create something that inevitably becomes problematic, in some shape or form. The only solution is to create nothing at all. 
And that is not a solution I can  live with.
I’m sure kindred spirits feel the same, and all throughout reading this passage I felt a deep connection with who the author was as a person, divorced from the ways I saw him before.
The intent of art
The quality of art
The effect of art
These things can be aligned but they can also be beautifully distinct from one another in such an impactful way. I walk away from the words that I read with a renewed interest in the role of art and how it shapes the world and is shaped by it. Like a portrait can be a mirror it can also reflect what we see in ourselves and others. In this way I want to thank the author, but I know I wouldn't be able to with the words coming out of my mouth, nor do I think I even should try to. 
His words were for himself, and nothing more need be said by me.
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aesthetic-bastard · 1 year
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Media Interaction 2022
Part 3: March
Golden Kamuy (manga) - I had never heard of this series or seen anything of it until March of this year when a friend over discord showed it to me and said "You strike me as someone who would be really into golden kamuy, all the men are strong assholes" and since then my interest had bloomed wildly.
I had originally started reading this series in March but didn't finish reading it until July. I do think after reading this for the first time it is definitely going up there with some of my top favorite things I have ever read. I am astounded I had been unaware of it for so long considering it had been in serialization for 7 years and the first season of the anime adaptation dropped in 2018 but my interests back then have changed incredibly since I was 17 and in my junior year of high school. I do feel like this was another piece of media besides No More Heroes that has had a strong impact on my range of interests this year. Golden Kamuy has a lot of themes in it that really appeal to me such as history, animals, indigenous culture, weird humor, and MEN! When first reading through Golden Kamuy I did not expect this manga to be so explicitly homosexual I was not prepared for so much man service I have never read anything so delightful in the men department before. I genuinely did not know something like this could ever exist. Besides being power blasted by constant half-naked men I did not expect to tear up quite a lot going through the story. I think some of the moments that particularly hit me hard were the story behind Tanigaki's kane mochi, Tsukishima and his past lover, and Ogata. A lot of the characters in this manga are very touching to me I feel like their emotions are very palpable and I connect very heavily with quite a few. The cast ensemble for Golden Kamuy is HUGE and I love big cast ensembles there are just so many characters in this manga to get to know and love I don't think there isn't a character I don't like (unless it's the prisoner from Abashiri that fucks animals) I do like that each of the escaped Abashiri convicts are more than just a character that shows up and that they each have a backstory and are never written to be like disposable weekly villains in a battle shounen. After finishing Golden Kamuy I felt that this manga had a lot of things to say on various subjects such as the impact of ethnic cleansing on marginalized groups, the drastic consequences of human greed, the importance of passing down your lineage/family traditions/culture, and a lot about the effects of war and violence. I think Golden Kamuy handles these subjects very sincerely and I admire the historical accuracy and dedication poured into this manga. I've grown very fond of history in the past year and I felt like I have absorbed so much information after reading this that I never knew before.
Resident Evil 7 - This was a game I experienced vicariously through one of my friends streaming it for me over discord. I had previously watched my friend stream for me Resident Evil 8 in December so I was excited to see Ethan Winters again in our playthrough of RE7. I, unfortunately, don't have very much to elaborate my thoughts on since I didn't experience this game firsthand. Still, I do significantly appreciate the character Ethan Winters in the Resident Evil series and feel he is a character that I connect to. I like that out of all of the protagonists in this series we never see Ethan's face. In what few renders we see of him his face is obstructed by a shadow and I feel like that adds to his design. I love Ethan not just because I sympathize with the horrific things done to his family but because Ethan is so, socially inept?? I am positive there is an interaction Ethan has in RE7 where he witnesses something incredibly shocking and his response to this event is "WHAT THE FUCK. now that's special" Again I wish I had more thoughts to share about RE7 because I did enjoy it and since this was so fairly into the year 2022 I'm having trouble recalling most of my experience. In fact, I remember more from our playthrough of RE8 than RE7.
Alien 9 - Wow I um. hmmmmm. Not one of the most incredible things I have watched this year. I've seen Alien 9 get hyped up in that niche circle of avant-garde animes. The most comparable anime I hear people pair it with is Neon Genesis Evangelion and I kind of see the comparison? I already have mixed feelings about EVA but I like to try and give things a chance. I've noticed for some reason people REALLY like to recommend me animes where children are constantly tortured physically or mentally and I'm kind of not into that sort of thing, to be honest. I was aware that Alien 9 is an OVA and that not all chapters from the original manga were adapted. Each episode was about 30 minutes and there were only 4 of them to get through. Every episode of this OVA felt like I was being subjected to child torture. You can say to me this is a brutal coming-of-age story with deep meaning and symbolism but at the end of the day I still saw a child scream, whine, whimper, and cry. The protagonist of this series really got under my skin, it genuinely pains me to see female characters in anime that are so weak and incompetent and never grow as a character. The OVA never establishes a lot of plot points like why are the aliens coming to earth, why are little girls chosen specifically to fight off these aliens, and why do all the adults treat the idea of little girls fighting aliens so nonchalantly. All of this is probably established in the manga but I am so turned off by this I do not care enough to want to know. I think my brain is just way too small to understand phycological animes
Serial Experiments Lain - Yet another piece of media I consumed this year that made me go "wow ok" I've seen Serial Experiments Lain hyped up EVERYWHERE and I've noticed there's a correlation with people who are huge fans of this anime having an unhealthy relationship with the internet to the point of their existence being terminally online. I knew I wouldn't care very deeply for this anime but I guess the art style is cool? Despite disliking Serial Experiments Lain I think my biggest takeaway was a scene where Lain is in class and is approached by a group of girls that go out of their way to include Lain in their friendly after-school activities. The lead girl of this friend group confronts Lain and tells her she's worried about her spending so much time on her phone (just like all the people who like this damn anime) This girl expresses her concern with Lain and wants her to come and spend time having fun along with their friend group instead of being so absorbed into the internet. If I got anything out of this anime it would certainly be this one specific scene and it sticks out to me because of the fact everyone so obsessed with this anime has such a harmful relationship with the internet it is almost like watching a parody. I'd also like to say my favorite character out of the entire series is a guy that shows up for one episode at club Cyberia and simply says something like "yo wuzz up Lain" amazing character. carried the whole show.
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pilgaardday57 · 2 years
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wolfstar-in-color · 3 years
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August colorful column: AUgust special - The World Needs Your Highly Niche AU
During August, here in Wolfstar in Color we decided to celebrate AUgust - or, the existence of Alternative Universes in fandom. Because of this, we invited @fforsythiaaa​ to talk a bit about AUs from a literary point of view - and let me tell you, folks, we are beyond amazed and inspired by her words.
So we invite you to read the column that follows. If you want to know who @fforsythiaaa​ is, here’s a primer from herself: “I post about wolfstar, fanfiction as an art and experience, and whatever words, fanart, thoughts, tips, or anecdotes that I can't let go unshared.”
Read under the cut for the full column!
The World Needs Your Highly Niche AU
@fforsythiaaa​
I don’t remember when I found out that fanfiction came in AU flavor, but looking back, that was definitely the moment I fell head over heels for the fandom. Reading wolfstar come together, fall apart, orbit around each other, or weather the storm in a thousand different settings is amazing. It’s romantic to think that they would find each other no matter which plane of reality they’re on, and it’s satisfying to see their core traits manifested in so many different contexts. And considering JKR’s harmful views and actions, as well as how her views make it into the text, I’m finding myself much less inclined to interact with fics that are even canon-divergent. 
That said, there’s one thing that gets me so, so excited, and that’s when I see someone refer to a fic as a “highly niche” or “weirdly specific” AU. Stories that are specific to time, place, culture or identity are my favorite kind. It’s Remus and Sirius as scientists doing fieldwork together in a fellowship program in the mountains! It’s Remus and Sirius as communist organizers in 1920s Chile! It’s Remus and Sirius in a rural town impacted by the opioid epidemic! It’s Remus and Sirius as an architect and a contractor at odds on a very important and difficult project! (I made that one up, but if you write it, please, please tag me.) You’re telling me I get to read about these two starcrossed idiots and learn stuff at the same time? Count me in.
“But no one will want to read this,” the author will post. “It’s too specific, no one will be able to relate, and people won’t be interested in this kind of premise.” 
To which I say, unequivocally, I WANT TO READ YOUR HIGHLY NICHE AU. And what’s more, I think your highly niche AU is going to make the fandom a better place.
Let me start by saying that I completely understand why you think no one would be interested. People like stories that they can relate to; fewer people can relate to a very specific setting; therefore, fewer people would like a very specific story. Right?
The main problem with this logic is the assumption that people can only relate to stories that they have some prior experience with. With every story, the reader is learning about the time period, the place, the norms and rules and societies, and the characters. As readers, this learning is what makes reading fun, and as wolfstar fans, learning about these characters is the reason we read fic in the first place. So my logical conclusion is that the more we get to learn about Remus and Sirius and the world they inhabit, the more we enjoy reading. And in a highly niche au, there’s a lot of learning to do.
Full disclosure, I did not make this idea up. There was one post that made me think of Viktor Shklovsky, a literary critic who coined the term “defamiliarization.” They wrote something like: “I’m worried that all the details would be distracting for the reader and interrupt the story.” Shklovsky basically says that that’s the whole point. 
For extra credit, you can certainly read “Art as Technique” in its entirety, but I’ll dig up my literature degree and give you the gist. When you think you know something, you don’t really see it or perceive it. Think about a stretch of sidewalk you walk on every day. How much time do you spend noticing weeds growing up through the pavement, or where the concrete was repaired with a different material, and how much time do you spend just walking to work? Your brain skips right over the details to be more efficient. Art is meant to make us perceive the world instead of skip right to knowing it; it’s meant to make us notice those weeds and that concrete. Shklovsky says that the technique of art is to make objects unfamiliar so it takes us longer to perceive, to understand. In poetry, each unfamiliar word or detail is a rock in the path that makes us walk more slowly and look more carefully at a road we thought we knew. 
In your super specific AU, that niche setting that your readers aren’t familiar with is part of what makes reading enjoyable. You’re making us walk more slowly through Remus and Sirius’s story so we can perceive their character and conflict differently; that gives us more time to enjoy the story. You’re making us think differently about what the human experience can look like. 
That’s where I start making my argument that branching out from coffee shop and college AUs (which I also love dearly) is a positive step for the whole fandom. We know that representation of people outside the dominant culture is really, really beneficial (that’s another post, and also the whole point of Wolfstar In Color; if you want some Cliff notes to share with the class, check the classic Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie TED talk). When we’re in the habit of hearing lots of different stories instead of only one, we’re in the habit of being curious about each other; it’s much easier to build compassion, understanding, and solidarity when we genuinely want to know more about other people. 
But my push for highly niche AUs is not about filling AO3 with a thousand million stories that perfectly represent the lived experience of every individual reader (unless…?). It’s more about filling the fandom with enough different types of stories that people start thinking, “you know what? If their story belongs here, so does mine.” 
That’s how we make this space feel safe enough for people to participate, whether as writers, readers, or tumblr posters. It’s a much more effective way of demonstrating that the fandom values diverse voices than just saying platitudes about how everyone’s voices matter. Sometimes your existence is radical enough. We need it, and we want to hear about it.
So the next time you think about writing “literally no one asked for this highly niche au,” come back to this post and think again. I’m asking for you to give me an opportunity to learn new things. I’m asking for you to add one more reason for a budding author to think that maybe their fic belongs here, too, and maybe their experiences are more valuable than they thought. I’m asking for you to give me an opportunity to discover new facets of human experience with this painfully tragic and romantic pair as my companions. Here it is: I’m asking.
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ohheyitsokay · 3 years
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found
pairing: Paz Vizsla x reader
wordcount: 3.3k
warnings: brief mentions of cannon typical violence, the general awkwardness of writing a new character, fluff
summary: you're someone surprisingly good st finding lost things, and you find a Mandalorian - who's looking for home
<<
Trying to get over my need to over explain things by leaving random plot holes. Don’t think about it too hard.
The charred remnants of the base were in tragic, disorganized, smoking piles all around you.
Feet still, you breathed in through your nose and out through your mouth, too tired to be in awe of what had taken place, too overwhelmed to realize that you were unscathed.
When a figure stepped out from behind one of the heaps, only your eyes moved, impressed in spite of yourself that they had managed to stay silent. It was a being barricaded in armor, solid like they were carved from the mountain around you, but blue, shockingly, wonderfully, beautifully blue.
You wondered if you had it in you to fight him.
It hadn’t been so long ago, that you’d met other Mandalorians – their helmets so full of pompous you wondered how they could fly. As he walked closer, you noticed that he did not look like them, did not hold his chin so high it begged to be knocked with the blunt end of a weapon. There was pride in his shoulders still, but no more than was in yours, and he approached you with empty hands.
“What happened here?” his voice had a rumble but he seemed curious, not disbelieving or angry.
“I tricked them,” you told him, and you were surprised to find yourself unafraid of telling him plainly. “I was looking for a missing flock of sant birds, and found them plumping the bellies of imperial troops.” You gestured loosely to a sparse gaggle of silly little beaked creatures tied a string toward the edge of the rubble. “I muddled the communication signals until they believed there was an incoming attack, and their would-be rescuers believed their own troops were the enemy.”
The Mandalorian's back straightened slightly and his helmet tilted.
“You did that for sant birds?”
“I have no love for imps or those who take what is not theirs,” it came out defensive, although he hadn’t belittled your choice. “It was more effective than I expected, but there were not many living who are not anymore, just droids.”
“You are one who finds what it lost?” there was a question there, but not one spoken aloud, and the subtext screamed.
“Can I help you find something, Mandalorian?”
His shoulders rose slightly - just a hair, really - and you couldn’t sworn his helmet dipped.
“Yes.”
-
Your fingers danced along the buttons and levers of the ship’s control panels, waiting for a command from your mind that would never come. They moved when you thought, searching for a memory – you couldn’t help it.
Next to you, Paz watched, amused as your sharp eyes were unfocused, mouth open just slightly with unspoken words.
“What are you thinking of, little one?” he asked, as quiet as he could manage, snapping you back to the present.
“When we first met,” you turned to him with a smile that made him fidget in his seat. It baffled him, how good you were, and how steady you’d been by his side.
Paz didn’t respond with words, just a thoughtful hum as he watched the stars race by in streaks. You didn’t know, but he was a little embarrassed by it – how enraptured he’d been by you, how quickly he trusted you.
After being separated from his clan, injured and angry, he had spent months stewing and brewing plans for finding his brethren again to no avail. Paz even hitched rides with strangers and picked up less than ideal work, hoping for something of his people to point him in the right direction.
Still healing, he settled on a little planet known for its rumors, known for spreading and sharing information so fresh it hadn’t had time to be twisted. It was there that he waited for words of Mandalorians, met the… other clans, and it was where he heard of you.
On the surface you weren’t remarkable, the whispers said, just a traveler with an uncanny ability to find lost things, and just smart enough to bend the world to your will and just slippery enough to stay one step ahead of genuine trouble. They said you were caring and cunning and clever and had a knack for judging a person’s character. From word alone he liked that, liked you.
The farmer who owned the barn he was sleeping in told Paz that he had asked you to find an old necklace of his mothers. A day later, both the necklace and a long lost sister were joining them for dinner, and you shrugged off both the thanks and the payment with a smile. Paz knew, because he had heard you distantly, through the weathered slats of the barn, and it stayed with him.
The dismissive words reminded him of home - the first reminder that wasn’t painful - evoking moments that were sweeter than the ache of loss. He would have said the same thing, when the Mandalorian’s who were not warriors requested his help. It wasn’t strict custom, but the way, to accept meals instead of money, stories instead of useless metal. Your actions, words, and far-away laughter reminded him of his home.
And when he found you, uninjured, a glint of satisfaction in your eyes and pride in your shoulders as you spoke casually about justice he couldn’t go back. You were almost glowing in the light of the still smoldering embers, gorgeous and determined and he knew he only had one choice – one shot take you with him.
Paz wasn’t in the habit of making promises he wasn’t absolutely sure he keep but he made himself one that day, buried it like a time capsule somewhere in his chest.
And then immediately put it to the test, by testing you.
He looked over at you, your hands now fiddling with your chair, and he fought the urge to mimic the movements. “I evaluated you,” he hoped you could hear that he was smiling.
You snorted, an impolite noise that made want to laugh.
Standing, you widened you stance comically lifting your limbs in an effort to be bigger, mocking him and saying “If I hire you, little one, I must know that I can trust you,” in an exaggerated tone. The exact words he’d told you after his test was over, something you teased him about often. Paz was laughing, but he wondered if you liked how deep his voice was – it was the key change to your mimicry. Looking satisfied with yourself, you settled down again, reminiscing.
The test had been to accompany him on a mission he’d picked up for extra cash – there were plenty of opportunities to be reckless but you gambled with neither his life nor your own. It was one of those circumstances where you were moving and guarding cargo for a rich young diplomat. He told you afterwards he wanted to see if you’d pocket anything beyond your payment, and of course you hadn’t.
“I passed with flying colors.”
The mission had veered left, when a misinformed bounty hunter pressed the tip of a blaster against your throat. At the time you were nearly strangers, but you didn’t give him up, even when you realized the bounty hunter was looking for a woman.
Paz was as in awe of you then as he was now. You agreed to help him the remnants of his clan, and to travel with him, and his promise to himself remained intact.
He nodded.
-
When he was young, Paz had a sweetheart, a kind Mandalorian girl with whom he enjoyed spending time with. It fizzled as apprenticeships and training were traded politics and responsibilities, and he had always had fond memories of that time.
It paled in comparison to how he felt about you.
You had been searching on your own for something you swore would help your search, and had been gone for days. If he hadn’t been sure before, he was certain now – what you were to him was infinitely more than anything else he had ever known. Still, he felt like a schoolboy, missing you, glancing at the door to the ship with eagerness every time he heard a creak.
He had thought for weeks it was because you felt like home, had been sure it was your ease with mando'a and his culture that made take to you like a duck to water. It made sense, he reasoned with himself. Of course he missed his family, those he was raised alongside, the very people who gave him purpose in life - of course he was looking for any scrap or taste of that wherever he could get it. Nevermind that your smile made him feel like he’d been stunned, it was just because your personal culture fit his like pieces of his armor.
Anyone would have been pleased, half smitten with someone who allowed then onto their ship, especially one as functional as yours. It was perfectly reasonable that he was comfortable with you, since you were always so thoughtful and honest and caring.
And you were talented, useful, that was all. The reason he valued you so highly was that you made his life easier, matched him step to step and balanced out his strength.
But that was all over now. It was special, how well you fit with him, and not to be taken lightly the vulnerability you gave as you shared your space and rations and time with him. All those other things were true, certainly, tenfold the longer you stayed in his company, but he could no longer explain away how much lighter his heart felt when you trotted into the ship, windblown hair and triumphant eyes.
He wanted you to be by his side, preferably if you wanted to be there.
Standing, he moved towards you, wishing he could hug you as you unceremoniously dumped your supplies on the floor. Instead, he picked them up, piling them or putting them back where they belong as you both filled each other in onto the days passed.
Eventually, the suspense overflowed, your excitement bubbling out of you.
“I got it!” your voice did something when you were excited that he couldn’t quite put his finger on, but it made him smile.
“Got what?” Paz swallowed a cyar'ika.
Eagerly, you produced a small drive and plugged it into the display, saying, “A map!” with pride.
“We already have a map,” That time, he nearly choked on the mesh'la his instincts insisted on, looking at you with genuine confusion.
When you grabbed his gloved hand, he thought he might never let it go.
“Not one like this, Paz.” You turned to the floating miniatures, and he only watched your face under their glow a moment longer before he tore himself away to look as well.
It was distracting, how close you stepped to him as you pointed, but your words were thick with value.
The map had details of Mandalorian sightings and rumors and stories. Even more than that, many of the planets had extra information tacked on, about resource numbers. Paz drank them in, your excitement finally making sense as he realized you were starting to highlight the ones where imported goods didn’t match the populations reported. Your voice was telling him you’d find them soon, that for him, you would do whatever it takes. His longing had become yours, in this little ship half buried in the dirt, under the expanse of the sky.
His hand found your shoulder, gently turning you and carefully, carefully, he hugged you.
-
The first three planets they chased were driven by pure, unadulterated excitement. He was eager for his brothers, eager to go back to protecting those who raised him and those who were being raised alike. Eager to be home, wherever that may be.
But as the weeks wore on, a realization settled in his mind. Finding home would mean your job was complete – his loss would be you, instead of his tribe.
And he did not like that thought at all.
It became a harsh contrast to his eagerness, as jarring as cool water cracking over heated metal, raising a stink that made his eyes threaten to fill. With each lead the two of you chased, there was a twist in his gut, anticipation suddenly less solid in his heart.
Your ship was nice, cozy and reliable, and he had filled his bunk with anything he found in the markets that reminded him of home. In between searches, you always managed to find the littlest work for the highest pay off – and really, work for a Mandalorian and his lovely, cunning companion was more than available. It was nice, filling your little kitchenette with foods you had introduced to him, and whatever he could get his hands on of the ingredients from his memories.
It wasn’t the same as his old home, with the people and culture who had shaped him, but it was something, and he… liked it, a lot.
He had gotten used to you, the way when his frustration built how you’d match it when he needed to, or lock him in a room with a pile of rations, or slip your hand between the gaps of his armor and rub circles with your thumb. Once he’d gotten in his head about the Mandalore, gone so far he wanted to fight everything that moved, maybe even stop some of them from breathing. You walked right up to him, wrapped your arms around his neck and leaned your weight on him until he remembered to breathe. And he didn’t really think anyone else in the galaxy would’ve done that.
So how could he give that up?
-
There was an elderly woman, Kori, who had missed the battle. Paz told you excitedly that she was fierce and had fought the armorer for the right to travel, unaware of the trouble that followed his brother-in-arms and the child.
You had set up the meeting at a little cantina you knew, and watched as Paz paced around your ship in his newly polished armor.
The last few months with him had been like a dream – and you had never been more selfish. When you’d met this Mandalorian you had been in awe, despite the previous encounters with the beskar-clad race. More than his formidable size, he cared fiercely, almost seeming larger by the passion that filled his frame.
And the more time you spent listening to his stories, why it all mattered so much to him, and having him listen to you in turn, the more thankful you were that he found you, and continued to let you help him in his search. He didn’t need you, not really. The man was resourceful and intimidating and held himself with the confident grace of a predator - it would have been just as easy for him to take what he wanted and be on his way.
It was strange, how his blood was equal parts humble and proud, but you were drawn to it, intoxicated by him. No one had ever made you feel as protected as he did, as… valuable as he treated you, and you ached for him. You couldn’t bear not to help him as much as you could, but you already knew you would miss your long nights spent talking or the way his gloved hand would grab yours like it was his second nature.
When it was time for the meeting, you had put extra care into your appearance, as if it would matter, wanting to make a good impression. Your companion stopped, and looked you over, and your feet shifted on the bumpy ramp of your ship.
Paz rumbled, as he had the first time you’d met, saying, “What is this?”
It made you laugh, sometimes, that someone so powerful and in control could be so awkward at times.
“Is it bad?” you quipped, trying to sound as though you did not care what he thought. In truth, he was the only one you had ever wanted so badly to think you were attractive.
Paz made a small noise, one you thought you recognized as annoyed, and you turned in time to see his helmet shaking and his shoulders tense.
“Mesh'la,” his voice was lower than normal. Logically you should’ve expected it, but it was amazing, almost overwhelming how his hand enveloped your cheek.
“Thank you,” you whispered, leaning into his touch. It was warm, and you felt selfish for wondering how much moreso it would be without his gloves.
And then a moment later the touch broke and he was hurrying to the cantina with you at his heels.
Kori was there, and they embraced. She greeted you kindly, but you kept your distance as they talked.
You settled at the bar, trying not to mourn a relationship that was hardly more than friendship, as you felt the eyes of someone on the back of your neck. It was a familiar feeling, and you turned, assuming it was Paz – but finding a man making his way over to you instead.
He was handsome, too tight clothes stretched over the muscles of his chest and a sweet, crooked smile. It made you think, maybe a distraction wouldn’t be so bad – and it wasn’t, at first. The guy was nice, attractive and charming and respectful enough that you let yourself actually enjoy his company. You almost didn’t feel the Mandalorians watching you – and you certainly didn’t see your Mandalorian's hands clench on the table.
-
Paz had hardly said a word to you since he dragged you back to the ship. He knew it was making you anxious, knew you were already waiting for him to start packing, knew you deserved some type of explanation as to what was happened but he just couldn’t.
For the very first time in his life he was petrified of getting the words wrong, desperate to say everything as right as be possibly could.
He wasn’t trained in this – they would say it was the way and move on, or have heated conversations driven by what they knew was right. Mandalorians weren’t … tactful, tentative, tender people, but Maker, did he want to be, for you.
You, in your nice clothes, settled in a crate, watching him and waiting, looking just touch guilty.
It’s not your fault, he wanted to say. It was his, for not being honest sooner. For letting you think he wasn’t head over heels in love with you, for letting you believe he would, could leave you. But he was angry, at himself and at the karking boy for thinking he had any right you make you smile like that.
Angry that it took Kori one look to know what he had spent weeks denying, to unearth the promise he'd made himself about keeping you close.
Angry it took her hand on his fists, and her quite, “Home is where the heart is, adi'ka,” for him to realize.
And when Paz was angry, words slipped past his tongue back down his throat like bitter medicine, and he couldn’t make it stop. He was a man who had spent years of his life in absolute control over every muscle in his body but he always failed with one, the one that seemed to matter most.
In the end, he remembered to do what he wished you would do – he pulled you into him, pressing he forehead of his helmet against yours.
In a moment, he could explain himself, tell you he loved you, ask you to let him stay. In a moment he would thank you for finding him.
But for now, he watched as the confusion cleared from your eyes before they closed and your mouth pulled into a smile, and didn’t run from the pride that filled him from head to toe.
<<
taglist:
@fangirl-316 @scribbledghost @writeforfandoms @beautyagegoodnesssize @princess76179 @mrsbentallmadge
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tackytigerfic · 4 years
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Hello good human I hope you are having a great day. And I just want to ask you if you have any advice with dealing feeling very very inadequate about one's own writing after reading ridiculously amazing fics. Like, I don't even know how they do it. And I don't even know if I could ever come close to that. I'm but a small potato writer. I'm grateful for the fics ofc, but sometimes I can't function after them because I just feel so down. It's a really weird and complicated feeling. You don't have to answer this if you don't want to, of course.
Hello good anon! All well here thanks and hope you are too.
I told my friends about this ask and they said “tacky why are you sending yourself asks” because I had literally just been weeping in our groupchat over the new aideomai fic (which is here and should be complete in the next day or two and everyone should read it and then come and flail with me).
I know this feeling, I feel it down to my very bones. So I can definitely sympathise. And it has very real effects on me - for instance, I don’t anticipate being able to write much of anything for the next few days while I process how good this aideomai fic is (I also get this feeling from ignatiustrout and I genuinely have to be careful about reading their work if I’m on a deadline as it can throw me completely out of the writing zone).
I would love to say that I just tell myself that my writing has worth and think about the two-cake theory, but if I’m totally honest I know that I’ll never be able to write like that, and I WANT to be able to, and it does make me sad. So how do I deal with that?
Really for me it comes down to just reminding myself that the reason I write fanfic is because I’m a... well, a fan. I wouldn’t be writing for the fandom if I didn’t have a deep and abiding love for these two idiots and their non-canonical romantic story arc. And the pleasure of reading the great fics is part of the joy of being in fandom, in the same way that there’s a safety and comfort in being surrounded by people who understand me, because they also have a deep and abiding love for these two idiots! I simply can’t not be grateful for that (though I agree, it is a complicated thing and thinking about it too much can feel a bit like probing at something tender and hidden).
The only thing I can do is to remember that someone else’s skill and talent doesn’t undermine me - it’s something to be celebrated (which can be hard to do I know!). And to remind myself that just because I’m not as good a writer doesn’t negate my right to belong here, and to produce content for a ship I love, and to explore my creativity in whichever way I choose (I choose writing gay wizard porn okay don’t @ me). 
Because the act of creating for a fandom is a far greater thing than the presence of any of us as individuals. It’s about shared excitement; it’s about the exploration of a pretty specific set of tropes and headcanons and theories and hopes and needs; it’s about celebrating the worth of a certain kind of story-telling; it’s about community and shared experiences. We’re not just writing in a vacuum here and that’s part of what I find so magical about it. And part of why it’s important (socially, culturally or whatever). Having people to chat to, who will commiserate and sympathise and, yes, sometimes give you a bit of stern talking to (or in my case, laugh at you until you realise you’re being ridiculous) is a great help. Discord groups are great for that - there are a few lovely Drarry-specific ones that I can recommend if anyone wants them. Sometimes it helps to know that lots of other people feel the same!
Sorry, this is not very coherent as it’s a tricky one to articulate - but eventually the urge to write takes me over again and I just keep on doing my best, because I love writing. I just love it. And for me, it’s worth just doing it even if it is complicated and weird. So as long as you’re feeling that urge, then you should keep writing!
Finally - many writers are their own worst critics. Many of us are slower to see our own worth. And we can all keep improving with hard work and practice. And the best way to become stronger is to exercise the writing muscle! So I think it’s important to try to keep at it, if you can.
I’m not sure that this is helpful but maybe it’ll be nice to know you’re not alone! Thanks for the ask - it was a very thought-provoking one and I enjoyed mulling it over.
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thebirdandhersong · 3 years
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Hey, so I've basically never watched any k-dramas, but I've read a lot of manga and manhwa and the automatic next step does feel like moving into k-dramas. You seem to have watched a number, so I was wondering if you could make a recommended list? Only if you felt like it of course, but it would be helpful! (Preferably of at least some which are on netflix uk, I looked up 18 again but it's unfortunately not on here in Britain :(. But if you have favourites I'd just like to know them so I can look out for them anywhere)
Also yay! Your term's ended!
(yanks open the door) did someone say RECOMMENDATIONS?? I DO have many!!! Boy do I have them!!!!
(YAY!! One last exam and I'm done for the summer!)
I love Eastern entertainment (manga, k-dramas, c-dramas, and movies from Korea and Taiwan) because of several reasons: the scripts are phenomenal nine times out of ten; Asian culture puts a strong emphasis on the importance of family, personal responsibility, learning from one's mistakes, expressing affection through gestures and acts of service, and friendship and I really love seeing that in a story; and they make good use of silence and stillness in shows and movies, which is pretty rare in Hollywood. The quiet moments between characters are more often than not some of the most important in the story and I Love That!!
The dramas I'm (briefly) listing are in bold if they're available on Netflix UK, and in bold and italicised if they're available on Rakuten Viki (which is a mostly-free drama streaming service, though unfortunately they're rather heavy on the ads). The Absolute Favourites are marked with stars (***). Though I can't actually see the whole list of dramas available in the UK, so some of these may be wrong, and it may be worth checking twice!
If you're in the mood for something fast-paced:
Descendants of the Sun (Viki); considered a Classic
- romantic comedy, medical drama, a bit of action
- The confident and charming leader of a Special Forces unit meets a reserved surgeon and they hit it off, after some... interesting misunderstandings. But after dating briefly and breaking up, they find themselves reunited on a peacekeeping mission in a war-torn country. Insert a lot of Suspense and Excitement but also a lot of Comedy and Sincere Declarations of Love.
- if you enjoy Song Joongki's performance, I'd also recommend his movie A Werewolf Boy. If you enjoy Song Hye-kyo's performance, I'd recommend her drama Encounter.
***Come and Hug Me (Viki, but I don't know if it costs money?)
- thriller/suspense, romance, this one genuinely stressed me out but the moments of peace and reconciliation (and the ENDING) were well worth it
- Their first loves during their youth ends in her mother's death and their separation. Years later, the lively daughter of the murdered woman is now an actress, and the introverted son of the serial killer has become a police officer. They meet each other again (Of Course) and have to tackle all sorts of Nonsense (including the serial killer's return, his murderous brother's return from prison, the Media, the ghosts of their past, etc. etc.) together. HUGE focus on forgiveness, hope, healing, unconditional and self-sacrificial love. Also one of the best redemption arcs (I did in fact bawl my eyes out)
- my friend just started crying when we first watched this drama together because the male lead is just so gentle and tenderhearted and steadfast :')
If you're in the mood for something a bit slower
***Goblin/Guardian (Viki); International Acclaim
- fantasy, drama, one of the funniest dramas I've ever watched, but also tears (I cried at a rate of around once every two episodes. This show talks a lot about life and meaning and the effect your actions and words have on the people around you.)
- Kim Shin, a general from the Goryeo Dynasty, is cursed to live as an immortal Goblin (a Korean mythical/fairy tale figure) until his destined Bride pulls the sword from his chest, thus breaking the 'spell' and ending his life. He really did not expect his bride to be the vivacious and irrepressible Eun-tak, though, and What's More!! He did not expect that he would start wanting to live again :))) Includes a surprising amount of comedy, a surprising amount of tears, and EXCELLENT screenwriting. (Descendants and Goblin share the same brilliant writer.)
- fun fact: parts of it were shot in Quebec!! One of the characters refers to Canada as "the maple nation" early on in the story and my friend and I just burst into laughter.
***Encounter (Viki, but I'm not sure if it costs money?)
- melodrama, romantic comedy, FAIRY TALE
- a cold and withdrawn woman, recently divorced because of her husband's infidelity, and a warm-hearted and optimistic young man meet on the streets of Cuba by accident, and upon separating without means of contact, find themselves back in Korea as boss and newly hired employee. This sounds like a recipe for disaster: stuffed to the gills with unnecessary workplace drama and gossip, etc. but the story focuses instead on family, vulnerability, transformation, sacrifice, about art, compassion, mending relationships, opening up to people, and about the beauty in bringing and receiving comfort and love.
- also. ALSO. Fairy tale!!! with illustrated opening and ending cards and everything!!! (they literally refer to her as the Ice Princess. And her Prince is the human equivalent of sunshine. I Love him)
- if you like Park Bo-gum's performance, I'd recommend Reply 1988, too!
***One Spring Night
- melodrama; quiet and understated but very beautiful
- A bright, clever, and sharp-tongued librarian meets a quiet, steady, and gentle pharmacist one day. It turns out that he's a single father, and she's trapped in a relationship that really isn't working out. Friendship! Family! Sisters standing up for each other and saying No I Won't Let You Treat My Sister Like This, You Jerk! Figuring things out! Learning how to love! I really don't know what else to say, except for the fact that I loved it very much!!
- if you enjoy Jung Hae-in's performance, I'd also recommend Something in the Rain (which should also be on Netflix!) for his acting alone. I just think he's neat.
Reply 1988
- slice-of-life, comedy
- In the late 1980s, five friends (four boys, one girl) who have grown up with each other since childhood are Going Through It in high school. This drama is all about the little things that happen in life, and about learning to understand your family and your friends. Deok-sun is just trying to survive all of This as the middle child, and as a young girl who is trying to figure this Romance thing out. In the present, adult Deok-sun is just as lively, and is now happily married..... but to whom? :))) A Lot of '80s Asian culture, daily antics, and good old friendship.
- if you like Park Bo-gum's performance, I'd recommend Encounter too :)
18 Again (Viki)
- romantic comedy, fantasy/time travel (sort of)
- Nearly twenty years of marriage, and things have been going Wrong all over the place. His wife wants a divorce, he's no longer close to his teenaged kids, and he's just lost the job he's been faithfully working at for years. Daeyoung wishes that he could go back somehow, and finds himself 18 once again.... except he's still in the present. Interesting things ensue. He enrolls in school (it turns out to be the same one his kids attend), and decides to pursue the dreams he had to give up when he was a teenager. Antics ensue! But also Healing: he gets to know his kids all over again, and is able to view his relationships with Dajung (whom he still loves. Of course) and his estranged father in a new light.
- I have not finished this drama yet but judging from the first third of it, it is both well-written and well-acted. There are a few things that I am not a fan of, but on the whole Lee Dohyun's performance is wonderful and I have already cried buckets.
Other honourable mentions:
100 Days My Prince: historical drama. Prince caught in an assassination plot, loses his memory, wakes up in a village right when the king issues a marriage law that results in his marrying the spirited 'spinster'.
Still 17/Thirty But Seventeen: 17 year old violin prodigy in a coma after an accident, wakes up when she's 30; the boy who inadvertently caused the accident runs into her again after she wakes up and helps her adjust to her new life. Lots of wacky humour, very sweet!!
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doshmanziari · 3 years
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Musical Offerings for the New Year || What is “Radical Music” in 2021?
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Near the end of 2020, a bunch of musicians populating a chatroom, including myself, each submitted ten minutes’ worth of our work to another musician, Chimeratio, who generously compiled it all into a set totaling nearly ten hours.¹ The work didn’t need to be new; just what we thought might best represent our abilities/style(s) and/or perhaps what we were especially pleased with. The set premiered in late January. Since I have some tentative plans for reorienting Brick By Brick this year, while not overriding its emphases, I wanted to share that music with anyone who’s interested.
I compiled the four videos into a playlist, although you can also access them individually: here (1), here (2), here (3), and here (4). If you care to, and are on a computer, you can also view the accompanying chatlog and read people’s responses from when they were listening to the live broadcast.
The compulsion for this project was sparked by excited discussions over and usage of the term “digital fusion”, most helpfully propagated by Aivi Tran, designating a computer-based body of work that for years lacked the rooftop of a commonly agreed upon genre-name. While describing my music has never been a big concern, even if it’s usually felt impossible (what, for example, is this? or this? I dunno!), I’ve appreciated how the spread and application of this term has brought together people who may have felt isolated.²
As “digital fusion” gained designative traction, I witnessed the activity in the aforementioned chatroom explode over the course of a few days. Before, a day’s discussion might’ve been a few dozen messages; now, there were dozens of messages every half-minute. This had positive and negative ramifications, the negative being that conversations often proceeded at a pace of rapidity which precluded concentrated thought. Eventually, I bowed out because the rapidity exceeded my threshold for meaningful interaction; but I was glad that significant invigoration was going on.
I wanted to share this music also because it intersects with thoughts and talks I’ve been having stemming from the question, “What is ‘radical music’ in 2021?” This was stimulated by a 2014 talk given by the writer Mark Fisher, wherein he contends that, were we to play prominent “cutting edge” music from now to people twenty years ago, very nearly none of it would be aesthetically shocking, bizarre, or revelatory (think of playing house music to an audience in the early 1960s!). Fisher also observes a trend of returning to music which once was seen as the future -- as if, deprived of a shared prograde vision, imaginations turn hazily retrograde; ergo, genres such as synthwave or albums like Daft Punk’s Random Access Memories.
It isn’t my goal here to argue about the “end of history.” Fisher’s time-travel hypothetical, however, rings loud and true to me. Visible musical radicalism has, for at least a decade, been strictly extra-musical, in the sense of songs like “This is America” or “WAP”, where one’s response is primarily to the spectacle of the music video, the performer’s identistic markers, and/or the manner in which the lyrics intersect with (mostly US-centric) ideological hotspots. Musically, there is really nothing radical here. Any vociferous condemnations or defenses of a song like “WAP” deal in moralizing reactions to semantics or imagery: how progressive or regressive is the political aspect? how propelled or repelled are we by the word “pussy”?
It would be a mistake, and simply wrong, to assert that the only music one can enjoy escapes the parameters outlined above; and my inability to coherently categorize some of my own music hardly raises that portion to the status of radicality. But the question here pertains to what is being made, and I think that if we’re going to seriously consider the nature of truly radical music today, we do need to question if such a quality can prominently exist when our hyper-fast consumerist cycle seems to forbid not just sustained, lifelong relationships to artwork but also the local, unhurried nourishment of creative gestation. Now, in my opinion, there are good, even great, examples of radical music still being made in deep Internet-burrows, and for evidence of that I would offer some of the material contained in the linked playlists. Moreover, I’d say that this quality can exist in part because these little artistic communities are so buried.
Let me share a quote that another person shared with me recently:
For culture to shift, you need pockets of isolated humanity. Since all pockets of humanity (outside of the perpetually isolated indigenous people in remote wilderness) are connected in instantaneous fashion, independent ideas aren’t allowed to ferment on their own. When you cook a meal, you have to bring ingredients together that have had time to grow, ferment, or decompose separately. A cucumber starts out as a seed, then you mix it with the soil, water and sunlight. You can’t bring the seed, soil, water and sunlight to the kitchen from the get-go. When you throw those things in to the mixture without letting them mature, the flavor cannot stand out on its own. Same thing with art and fashion. A kid in Russia can come up with a new way to dance, gets filmed on a phone, it goes viral quickly but gets lost in the morass of all of the other multitudinous forms of dance. Sure it spread far and wide, but it gets forgotten in a week. In the past, his new art form would have been confined locally, nurtured, honed, then spread geographically, creating a distinct new cultural idiosyncrasy with a strong support base. By the time it was big enough to be presented globally, it was already a cultural phenomenon locally. This isn’t possible anymore. We’re consuming too many unripened fruits.
The main impression I have here is that radical music today will, and must be, folk music. Our common idea of folkiness might be the scrappy singer strumming a guitar, but my interpretive reference rather has to do with the idea of a music being written, first of all, for one’s self, and then shared with a small-scale community, which in turn helps the artist grow at their own pace. This transcends a dependence upon image, the primacy of acoustic instrumentation, or the signaling of sincerity versus insincerity. It is a return to the valuation of outsider art, so rare nowadays. As someone who I was recently in dialogue with wrote, “Where can you find new genuine folk music? Pretty much just with your friends, imo. Even then, the global world is so influential and seeps into any crack it can find. I think vaporwave was radical and folk for a while. Grant Forbes made that music way before the world knew about it.”
Sometimes, a lot of fuss is made over what’s seen as “gatekeeping” within certain communities. It can be, depending on the context, justifiable to question and critique this behavior. At other times, the effort of maintaining a level of exclusivity, of retaining an idiosyncratic shapeliness to the communal organism, can be a legitimate attempt to protect the personal, interpersonal, and cultural aspects from the flattening effect of monoculture. Hypothetically, I welcome the Castlevania TV series and Super Smash Bros. Ultimate having introduced new and younger demographics to Castlevania. In actuality, stuff like “wholesome sad gay himbo Alucard”, image macros, and neurotic “stan” fanfiction being what’s now first associated with the series makes me want to put as much distance as possible between my interests and those latecoming impositions.
The group-terminology David Chapman uses in his essay “Geeks, MOPs, and Sociopaths in Subculture Evolution” is kinda cringey, but some of the cultural/behavioral patterns he lays out are relevant to the topic. Give it a look. If we cross his belief that “[subcultures] are no longer the primary drivers of cultural development” with our contemporary consume-and-dispose customs, we’re left with the predicament of it’s even worth attempting to bring radical/outsider art beyond its rhizomatic habitat. This is troubling, because it would mean that artistic radicality no longer might not only refuse to but cannot encompass cultural upheaval. It would be like if dance music were invented and -- instead of progressively permeating nightlife, stimulating countercultural trends, and ultimately being adapted as the basis for pop music globally -- only were listened to via headphones by a few thousand people on their own, stimulated a group meeting once a year or two, and never affected music beyond a niche-within-a-niche. That’s a very sad picture to me.
¹ Chimeratio has also maintained an excellent blog on here dedicated to looking at videogame music written in irregular time signatures, far preceding higher-profile examinations like 8-bit Music Theory’s video on the same topic.
² For myself, creative isolation has had its uses, because it has led me down routes that are highly personalized. The isolation can be dispiriting too. Although a lot of my music is videogame-music-adjacent, almost none of it uses “authentic” technology, such as PSG synthesizers or FM synthesis; and the identification of those sounds is fairly important for recognition.
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pepperful-qt · 4 years
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hi can u write smth on like headcanons on what type of person would tsukki tendou iwaizumi and kenma crush on 👁👄👁
ooh funfun. this is something i do a lot for characters i write about to make the reader character realistic, so this is right up my alley :3 this focuses primarily on personality rather than physical types (with a small exception)
*just a heads up, this is LONG
the type of person they crush on w/ Tsukishima, Tendou, Iwaizumi, & Kenma
*****
Tsukishima
for Tsukki it wouldn’t necessarily be someone exactly like him, but they’d have definite similarities
they’d earn his respect before they’d get his heart
hands down this person needs to have a thick skin. i think generally Tsukki doesn’t outright insult or harshly tease (like with Hinata & Kags) the people he really cares about or has affection for (look at his relationship with Yamaguchi), but he is blunt and sometimes unintentionally snaps or is just straight up mean
if someone is easily affected by that, it’s a no go, sorry
not to say they couldn’t get their feelings hurt, and he would feel bad especially if his crush had already developed, but initially there would need to be a resistance or retort to that kind of thing. they’d understand that his words come from a place of both honesty and care, and any lashing out is just a result of stress and unresolved emotion
yeah he’d be attracted to intelligence and wit
part of me just thinks he enjoys mental stimulation and someone who can make him think not only piques his interest in the person but also makes him enjoy and look forward to spending time with them
at the same time, being able to enjoy comfortable silence is important too
and wit. he’d definitely tease someone he has a crush on though and i’ll tell you why
he has two goals: get them flustered or get them to smile/laugh genuinely
he’d love someone that can tease back, and makes him work for a reaction
and--this is important--makes him smile and laugh
speaks fluent sarcasm
not a pushover, and not afraid to call him out when he goes too far 
they probably have weird habits or specific tastes or something, which he picks up on as the perceptive guy he is occasionally he uses them as fodder for teasing
they’d be someone with layers ha shrek or with personas they switch between easily, like going from sweet to stone-faced roaster
to tack onto the mental stimulation, you know how Yachi said Tsukki treats everything logically and approaches his blocking like a difficult test question? to an extent the same would apply to that person
he’d be figuring out how they tick, what makes them laugh, etc, and in the process of that it turns into a different kind of interest
it takes him a bit to figure out why exactly he likes seeing their smile or spending time with them, or why he cares so much
a certain subtle air of confidence
i think Tsukki would appreciate music taste
someone who is caring and generous, but doesn’t make a big deal out of it
they’d quietly offer help to a classmate if they noticed they’re struggling, or bring back an extra drink for him from the vending machine like it’s the most casual thing in the world
someone that cares about themselves, but not obsessed with themselves
to quote a favorite song of mine: sweet with a mean streak (not mean really, but not afraid to bite back)
* * *
Tendou
simply put, it wouldn’t be any average person
there would be something about the person that initially caught his eye, something unique that makes them stand out just a little
examples of this could be: a sharp tongue, a book or manga they always have on their desk, a keychain, dyed hair, wearing headphones all the time (he wonders what they’re listening to)
these would be things that make him interested and start paying attention to the person, eventually even striking up a conversation
in terms of personality, I think he’d enjoy someone with a sense of humor. obviously we know he can get along with most people regardless of that (ushijima) even if not everyone understands him, but someone that isn’t thrown off by his dramatic personality and responds in kind would definitely excites him
he likes to chatter, so a good listener and/or someone that’s a good conversationalist would be great tbh
and i’ll just say it, if this person is a manga/anime fan, or just knowledgeable on pop culture in general immediate bonus points. shared passions are great
an acknowledging smile or greeting, especially before they’re acquainted, actually goes a long way bc he has a history of being shunned and mocked by his peers. just that simple kindness which is unfortunate that not treating someone like that would be seen as kind is really important to him before he realizes it
a huge thing i think for him is feeling comfortable being himself around them. that itself allows him to be more open with his emotions and actually develop a crush
so going back to humor and a teasing relationship, it would need to be the type that doesn’t insult things like looks or anything like that. he has a history of insecurity that is still probably present, even if he’s mostly dealt with it, but again, being comfortable is huge. tasteful and dumbass humor only
someone who’s not afraid to say what’s on their mind. he appreciates that kind of directness, and finds it entertaining to an extent
there’s also a certain unpredictability and spontaneity with this person that keeps him on his toes and excites him. he loves a challenge
he’d love someone who shamelessly compliments him. truthfully it’s a bit of an ego thing, but in a specific way:
for Tendou, volleyball is his safe haven. that’s where he grew his confidence and skill and made his friends, so it feels nice for him to have someone appreciate the things he’s good at and cares about when he’s worked so hard for it  
and he loves looking and feeling cool, and being showered in compliments is a great confidence booster heyhey seratonin
he’d love to make them laugh
if they compliment something like his looks, humor, passion, etc that will always really touch his heart. he’d brush it off with an “i know right~?” but in reality he’s freaking out because those are important parts of his self that have really been ignored or unrecognized by most people
this person would become another safe haven where he feels accepted and confident, and genuinely enjoys being around <3
* * *
Iwaizumi
the first thing i thought of for Iwa is someone authentic
a person who is true to themselves and the people around them
he despises fake people. those types were usually the ones always confessing to Oikawa or improving themselves for him. he just thinks it’s wrong
a nice laugh. i don’t mean pretty and refined necessarily, but one that is genuine and contagious and unforced
maybe it is a naturally pretty or refined laugh, but what matters is that it’s a laugh that is theirs, not for anyone else. that’s what’s attractive to him and makes his heart speed up when he hears it
a person who is thoughtful, considerate, and compassionate. like Tsukishima, he appreciates the quiet type of kindness
but he finds it amusing when they get just a little flustered when another person points it out
another little thing, but he’d probably find someone who’s a bad flirter absolutely adorable
he’d appreciate someone emotionally intelligent and perceptive
this is a person that is usually aware of how others are feeling and is able to adjust themselves to be the most effective in that situation
for example, they can adjust their own behavior to make someone feeling nervous at ease or defuse an angry person getting out of hand
this means their advice and comments are taken much better
tbh i could see him liking someone both reserved or incredibly expressive
so they could be the type that’s an extroverted hard-to-hate ball of sunshine, or a calm individual who’s respected and whose presence is appreciated by everyone
either way, he’d notice it
this is really the exception to the ‘disliking fake people�� thing
and he’s a hot-headed, tough-love kind of guy. his caring nature is often hidden behind that behavior  
so he’d admire that kind of social ability and understanding
another thing that i immediately thought of for what he’s attracted to: passion and ambition
what their passion is is less important than the fire in their eyes when the topic comes up, or they talk about their aspirations and huge, sometimes unattainable goals
this doesn’t mean they have their life figured out, but they care both about the future and living in the moment
this is just a hunch, but he’d probably be more inclined to like an athlete or someone that takes care of their body and physical conditioning
someone who challenges him to be better. someone who understands what it means to be proud and understanding your own imperfections at the same time
a vocal supporter
whether it’s yelling his name from the stands when he makes a spike, or encouraging him to follow his passions after high school, or bragging about him to their friends, having someone unapologetically express their belief in him just makes his heart soar
but really, he likes someone who can cheer him on and tell it like it is when he needs it. he’s a pretty tough cookie so he doesn’t mind bluntness (actually prefers it)
i see him liking someone who can surprise him too
the kind of person to hit him up at midnight to go for a drive under the stars or have a dance party in the park to music from a bluetooth speaker
a passionate, authentic, and level-headed adventurer
* * *
Kenma
i’ve written so much Kenma recently lots of these traits are probably obvious lmao
first things first, he just needs to be able to vibe with them
it sounds obvious, but it’s really important. just being able to exist and not feel pressure to be someone he’s not is huge
another boy who loves comfortable silence, or someone who can talk and not mind him being minimally responsive sometimes because he is listening he’s just quiet
he’s an actions>words type of person though
so if they ask about his passions and actually show interest in him that’s great, and he notices, but following through is even better
examples: remembering his favorite flavors, engaging in conversation about the game he’s playing then the next day asking if he beat that level he was stuck on, asking how the tournament went when he mentioned how tired he was from consecutive preparatory practices the week before
things that show they do pay attention, and they do care
someone who looks out for him
this comes in many forms: bringing him a drink and snack bc you know he’s been up all night binging a new game and is probably dehydrated and hungry, or gently guiding him by the arm when he’s got his nose in his game and would definitely walk into traffic, or taking over in a conversation when they recognize he’s just hit his social quota
again, actions>words
along with this interest in him, trying to playfully get him to smile or get a reaction out of him would be annoying at first, but eventually would get him more and more flustered
sound contradictory to what i said before about him needing to feel not pressured? it is a little bit. he doesn’t get it either
really it’s the fact that this person wants to show the way he already feels
okay like Tendou, i feel like i have to say that if they play games or at least are knowledgeable about them, or even want to learn about them, it’s immediate bonus points
it’s one of his two loves. they don’t even have to be good at games as long as they can engage or listen to his rant about the history of a series or how the game mechanics differ between two different platformers and why one may be considered smoother gameplay, but it’s actually more restrictive--
you get it
someone who just casually checks in. “how are you doing?” then moves on and doesn’t make a big deal, but will listen if he needs to vent
like Iwa, he likes someone who’s straightforward and genuine
and like Tendou, there’s something about them that is unique that he latches onto
needs someone “interesting” that always brings some new experience
like Tsukki, he likes mental stimulation why do i keep using the others as examples lmao 
they need to have a sense of humor. may surprise you, but he is bffs with Kuroo, and someone witty is someone who’s interesting
he’s always got a lot on his mind, he’s always thinking
they’d need to be someone he feels comfortable conversing with and sharing his thoughts with, and is a good and responsive listener
some sort of intellectual capability
when he gets to the point where he actually seeks out their company, he starts to realize his feelings
and when he does, he’ll feel more nervous initiating interaction (afraid he’ll say or do something wrong) 
they need to be someone who will take the initiative and seek him out too, and that would only intensify his crush
*****
this turned into more of a character analysis,, oops?
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trolltrash · 4 years
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Trolls Soulmate AUs
I've toyed with the idea of soulmates in the trolls universe in my head for a while so here's what I got:
Soulmates don't have to be explicitly romantic, some choose to start a relationship while some remain best friends
Its more of a predestined bond type deal
Not everyone has one, and that's okay
I figure that the best fitting "type" of soulmate for the trolls universe would resemble the heartsong concept from Happy Feet
Every troll has a unique song that they feel in their heart that mixes perfectly with another's
This conveniently lines up with True Colors, but whether Branch and Poppy are platonic or romantic soulmates is up to you
Brickoppy is my jam, so I'm gonna add that it isn't discouraged for romantic soulmates to welcome other trolls into their relationship
With the Pop trolls, it was very very likely that your soulmate, or at least one if you had multiple, was eaten before you could meet
To find your soulmate was a great cause of celebration and the bond is cherished like gold because of the effects of Trollstice
I've also played around with the more classic tropes (string of fate, first words spoken upon meeting written on skin, etc.) which I realised has ripe angst potential on King Peppy's side:
The strings are only visible to the bearer and their partners
Poppy said she had three strings, which would've been more than fine with King Peppy, if she hadn't also said that two of those strings lead outside the village
He's well aware of the five other kinds of trolls beyond the forest, and he knows that with his little princess growing bigger and bolder everyday, she'll want to set out to go find her missing soulmates
This knowledge terrifies Peppy
The six tribes separated a long time ago because they couldn't accept their differences, so what if they didn't accept Poppy? What if they hurt his baby?
So instead, Peppy hides the existence of the music strings and their history from his subjects and his daughter, and he does a good job of it
That is, until a strange flying animal with an invitation from the Queen of Rock falls into his daughter's hands
Then I wondered how being gray might affect a soulmate bond:
With the heartsong soulmate au Branch, obviously doesn't sing until the first movie, so Poppy doesn't know until True Colors
With the string soulmate au, Branch turning gray causes his two strings to sever, so he has no idea who his soulmates are, not that he wants to know because he's terrified of losing anyone else
Poppy was devasted when she followed her blue string, the only one that didn't lead out of the village, only to find that no one was on the other end
She was inconsolable for weeks after her father said that it might mean that one of her soulmates was eaten before the escape
While she grieved, she made a resolution to love her remaining soulmates twice as much, to make up for the one she never got to love at all
I'm sure you can imagine her elation when Branch's colors were restored along with their shared string
Now that I think about it, a string soulmate au would work just as well as a heartsong au, if the six music strings gave the trolls soulmate strings along with their music
After the excitement of the first movie, Poppy and Branch determined that their orange strings probably lead to the same troll
Now for the Brickoppy goodness:
Hickory had long since given up looking for his soulmates
With the tragedy of his village's destruction, he figured one or both of them were long gone, and he never considered trying to look for them in the other tribes for fear of getting his hopes up
When Hickory took the job to track down Queen Poppy, he certainly didn't expect to find both of his soulmates at the same time, or to need to break them out of jail not five minutes after watching them make fools of themselves singing to the country trolls
Poppy was elated with meeting her second soulmate and Branch was stunned but still suspicious
"Guess folks 'round here don't 'ppreciate a rad medley when they hear one." You bet your ass Hickory was patting himself on the back for nailing that suave first impression on his soulmates
"Branch, Branch! Stop rescuing us for a second and look who I found!"
"Poppy, you don't even know who-" looks at his orange string and follows it to the cowboy across from him "...oh."
Branch is still distrustful of Hickory, just because they were soulmates didn't mean his motives for helping them weren't sketchy
Hickory was torn between genuinely helping his soulmates and saving his brother and culture the entire trip
When they got separated after the Rock Trolls attacked the Vibe City, he was more worried about their safety than losing their bounty
Branch definately feels betrayed when he finds out that Hickory planned to sell them out to Queen Barb, despite Poppy's reassurances that he tried to help her escape
Parb time! :
Barb would never admit it, but growing up she was thrilled to have a soulmate
The idea that she had someone other than her dad who would love her unconditionally, someone who wouldn't be scared off by her passion and intensity made her incredibly happy
When she learned about the pop trolls and how they messed everything up between the troll tribes, she couldn't help but notice how pink her string was, but shrugged it off as a coincidence
To prove to herself that it was just a coincidence she set off to find her soulmate at the end of her string....
....only for it to lead right out of the city
There was no doubt in her mind that Barb's soulmate was a traitorous, string-stealing Pop Troll of all things
With that confirmation, she despised the idea of soulmates
What, just cause some stupid string around her finger said that some preppy pop asshole was meant for her meaned she had to accept it?! Hell no! Barb wasn't going to be told who she would love! She loved her people, she loved her friends, she loved her dad, she loved them because SHE chose to, because she built those relationships alongside them, not because some string said she would, soulmate be damned
Then she finally meets Poppy and her first thought is "FUCK, she's cute!"
Despite her shock, she uses the fact that they're soulmates to taunt Poppy
"I'm not your best friend."
"You're right, we're not friends," holds up her hand with their string, "we're soulmates, Poptart."
Feel free to reblog with your own headcanons if you have any, because I've literally only seen one fanfic about this
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anarcho-smarmyism · 4 years
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Long post heads up
so im assuming this will be controversial but i’ve been thinking about this for a while, so please hear me out on this: pagans, even white American ones, literally are marginalized. now, i realize that by making this post i’m opening myself up to a lot of ridicule and accusations, so i ask that yall please do me the courtesy of actually considering what i have to say before you write this post off completely.
a few things to get out of the way first: to act like it’s equivalent to widespread racialized religious discrimination against well-known established religions such as Judaism or Islam is obviously wrong. to act like modern pagans aren’t mostly white and that our communities don’t have huge issues with racism is obviously wrong. i laugh at most posts criticizing pagans, because i genuinely think most of them are funny; it often comes across to me mostly as bemused roasting more than anything actually hateful. i feel like pagans often just need to learn to take a joke and take ourselves a little less seriously, as many religious people need to remind themselves. also, as someone who’s been hanging out in these groups for about 6 years now, i’ll outright tell yall that most pagan groups have ongoing issues with racism, transphobia, ableism, and other social prejudices, as well as the aforementioned predators and cults. many many pagans really do just go “lols The Spirits Don’t Care About Race silly sjws” and then appropriate the hell out closed traditions and act disrespectful as hell to the people who say it’s wrong; if you’re criticizing us for shit like this, GOOD. That’s legitimate criticism that we choose to ignore far too often. 
however, more and more of the “criticism” i see on here toward pagans is just saying we’re crazy, stupid, gullible, or other shitty nu-atheist talking points that have just been repurposed to target a growing fringe subculture that has been widely declared an acceptable target by culturally christian progressives AS WELL AS the religious right.
the justification for this is that no white pagans are discriminated against for being pagan, and i know for a fact that isn’t true. all the pagans i talk to report having to keep it a secret from family, friends, or coworkers -but for this post, i’ll keep it limited to my own experiences. i was abused by my parents as a minor for converting from christianity to a pagan faith, and having to keep my religion and experiences a complete secret from most of my friends and family really did take a toll on me. now, as an adult, i’ve learned to keep my religious beliefs a secret from most strangers and especially anyone who might know me at work, because people will start treating you differently -either like you’re evil, or gullible and stupid in a way they (mostly) don’t accuse mainstream religions of. when i was in the psych ward, i was refused my paperback holy text which i had brought with me for the same reason a christian would bring a bible into a scary and traumatic situation, but because the mainly-christian patients were bullying me for being pagan and the nurses didn’t want to deal with it, so the staff withheld it from me for 3 days until i could talk to a social worker. when my aunt took me in so i could move away from my parents, she coaxed me into sharing about my religion, which i naively did because it was rare for people to take an interest in it, and then the next day she told me if i didn’t get rid of all my “occult” stuff (mostly books and tarot cards), she would kick me out. i can’t get holy days off and in some states i can’t run for a lot of public offices unless I’m Christian. (yeah, i realize the post is talking about atheists, but people use those same laws against pagans as well, because as far as they’re concerned, we don’t believe in God, either.)
if any of this happened because i converted to buddhism or another well-known established open religion, people would call it religious discrimination. non-pagans who talk about this almost always say “yeah well you CHOSE to convert that religion, it isn’t a culture or religion you were raised in”, as though that means we’re under some obligation to quietly absorb any insults or abuse related to something so universally personal as one’s faith -like why does it matter to yall if i was raised in this faith, or converted? why is a faith only “real” if you were raised in it, or are adopting it literally from your direct ancestors?
i realize to people who aren’t religious that this may sound like nonsense, but my experience as a kid wasn’t that it looked cool and trendy and i wanted to feel special. i’m sure that some people are like that, but on the by and large, that’s just a strawman. Personally, whether my experiences that led me to convert were real or not is irrelevant: I was a kid who needed to be able to confide in adults about what i was going through, but the fact that I had started to perceive the world vastly differently than Christians did, and no longer believe in Christian theology, meant it was unsafe for me to do so. not being able to talk to anyone about it without getting either literally accused of being crazy, demonically possessed (happened many times) or like i was just stupid caused real, lasting damage. instead of being the source of stability, comfort, and fellowship that faith can be during difficult times, it’s often been something i feel i need to either hide from others, or defend my right to care deeply about.
as a result of people taking this attitude toward pagans, i and many other young pagans have to rely on online spaces to find any kind of fellowship with people who believe the way that we do. this is isolating and uncomfortable for most, and legitimately dangerous for some. see, if you confine a whole subculture to be either a joke or Satanic depending on your political leaning, the subculture generally develops an Us Against Them in-group/out-group mindset, which makes it much easier for predators and some actual cults to prey on vulnerable people.
keep in mind: pagans are not a monolith; it’s an umbrella term for a lot of different religions. (i don’t claim any kind of ancestral tie to my particular pagan faith, but since it was always an open culture and religion, it doesn’t matter if i have a “hereditary right” to it.) there are a lot of pagans of color, even including Heathenism which has a literal Nazi problem. (i’m referring to people i’ve met irl as well as online here.) lots of young queer people who feel rejected by mainstream religions find a lot of comfort in worshipping queer icons like Loki, Dionysus, Artemis, Set, etc. When you write off pagans as a whole for being just dumb racist white people, you throw them under the bus by erasing them. you isolate them the same way you do me, and they are even more likely to experience the kind of discrimination and abuse i have. is it really worth it to make them feel even more alienated in their religious choices, because they go against the mean-spirited stereotype that secular and non-pagan progressive people have crafted for pagans? 
Also, antifascist and progressive pagans are already swimming against the tide to make social prejudices persona not grata within our spaces, and it makes pagan reactionaries’ recruitment tactics WAY more effective when the world around new, insecure pagans tells them they’re automatically racist privileged white people for being interested in paganism. you don’t need to have any sympathy for bigots, but you should at least acknowledge the end result of this kind of rhetoric. i don’t like it either, but most people aren’t going to stop being pagan, or stop talking about it publicly altogether (as that seems to be the only thing that will make yall happy lol) when people make fun of them constantly; they’re gonna dig their heels in and do the in-group out-group thing people always fuckin’ do in these situations. that mindset makes otherwise-normal people, who may have been willing to learn and grow out of their background prejudices under other circumstances, easier for the truly racist monsters in our community to begin grooming.
paganism is a swiftly growing counterculture, and it’s more than likely that at some point it’s going to be part of a larger conversation on religious freedom. i don’t think people on tumblr or twitter roasting pagans is discriminatory necessarily, but life isn’t split up into “discrimination” and “okay things to do”. yall are pretty obviously just petty and excited to make fun of people who you think are weird, because yall can easily insist that every pagan is a privileged racist cis white lady, therefore it’s totally okay to be rude, dismissive, or just outright mean-spirited to pagans as a group because you’re pretending your bullying is enlightened or required by social justice laws. this is what we in pagan culture call “a dick move”. 
besides, it’s ten thousand times more accurate and funnier to roast us for being too self important and arguing over whether emoji spells are Serious Magic or not lmao.
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