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hamatoclan76 · 3 years

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Rise Splinter isn´t a very good parent and that´s okay.

Look, before someone starts throwing tomatoes i want to clarify something: I like Splinter from Rottmnt and i really like Rise of the Tmnt. People who have followed me for a while know i enjoy the series and i´m sad about it how was cancelled. I also want to say that i don´t think other Splinters are 100% perfect and they have their own issues too.

What i don´t like is how the Rise of the tmnt fandom often overlooks Rise Splinter´s character flaws and pretends that he is a perfect father figure because this is not something supported by both by the narrative and his character growth.

So, what i´m going to do in this post is to examine his character flaws, his role as parent and character arc in the series. The point of this is to bring up this flaws to light, this is not a ¨character critical¨ or whatever you want to call it. It´s supposed to be character analysis, okay?

Let´s start with the short Turtle Tots short:

Link to the short:

https://www.facebook.com/teenagemutantninjaturtles/videos/626074331524980/

This short is when the turtle brothers are still very young. We see that Splinter is trying to train them but he keeps watching a show he likes on TV. This short shows Splinter didn´t care about training his sons enough even when they were younger. He also leaves them with very dangerous weapons they don´t know how to use.

Splinter was already quite neglectful and careless since the start. He spend too much time watching TV rather than training his sons. It would more understandable if he was too busy working with something but here he is only watching a TV series. Later in the short he admits he should have paid more attention to the turtles and isn´t a good Sensei.

I have to say i didn´t like this short too much. I didn´t find funny the jokes of how Splinter ignores his sons for the TV series and leaves every 30 seconds. However, it provides some context for the characters and their relationship.

Now let´s talk about his characterization at the start of the series. (Season 1)

Splinter at the start of the series is usually seen watching TV, whatever is his old movies or shows that he likes. He is rarely seen training the turtles or talking to them. Sometimes their interactions are the boys trying to ask him about something while he is watching his series. Splinter either answers them or ignores them.

He is usually so caught up in his own world that he doesn´t seem to be aware of who are the turtles fighting against until it starts biting them back. The boys usually don´t tell him about their adventures on the surface. One could argue that he assumes that they barely get in trouble and they are just playing.

In the episode ¨The Fast and the Furriest¨ Splinter ¨steals¨ Turtle Tank and takes it for a ride without Donatello´s permision. The turtles go through a lot of trouble to get the Turtle Tank back. By the end of the episode its Donatello, his son,is the one who is putting a punishment on Splinter, who is supposed to be their father, for taking the Tank.

While Donnie getting angry at Splinter is quite funny,this episode shows that Yoshi can be very inmature at times, if not childish. He doesn´t ask his son to allow him use the tank, puts them in danger and is scolded like a child at the end instead of him being the ¨responsible adult figure¨.

Parents being cocky or careless isn´t something very new. There are parents that act as inmature or worse than Yoshi and would never admit they did something wrong. So, i take this episode as one of the examples that Splinter does this kind of things. He isn´t this selfish and reckless all the time, just sometimes.

Another aspect is that Splinter struggles with remember his sons´ names. He calls them by their color bandana instead of their real names. This sometimes can be funny but on the long run it becomes quite disturing,Imo. There is difference between ¨calling your son with an affectionate nickname¨ and ¨not remembering your sons´ name¨. There is a point that this it becomes sad.

The tmnt wiki describes Rise Splinter´s personality as a ¨Extremely flawed (albeit loved) father figure¨. This means that he has tons of flaws but he cares about his family: One clear example is when he helps Raphael with fighting his fear in ¨Mrs. Cuddles¨. He protects the big turtle a few times from the giant puppet monster and they defeat the monster together.

Splinter cares about April O´Neil like she was part of the family too. In episodes like "Always Be Brownies" he is seen hanging out with her and helping her. He also encourages April to believe more in herself since she has tons of doubts in that episode. (Season 2).

Hamato Yoshi / Splinter´s backstory

Lets say that Yoshi didn´t have the best childhood. His biological father was missing and he is not mentioned in the flashbacks. Splinter´s mother, Atsuko, left Yoshi when he was still a kid so she would be able to perform her family duty as protector in the Hamato family.

This terrible loss made Yoshi grow bitter with his Hamato duties and martial arts. He didn´t want anything to do with his family legacy since it was the reason that his mother was forced to left him. He had an argument with his maternal grandfather and sensei, Sho, and decided to use the skills he learned in during his training to become a superstar.

After many shenanigans involving his crush on Big Mama, a very powerful yokai, and Baron Draxum, Hamato Yoshi mutated into a humanoid rat and adopted the turtles, who were about to be used as soldiers by Draxum, like their own sons.

Splinter´s backstory explains a lot of his behaviour in the series: It´s implied his father died/left him, his own mother also left him to perform her duties and he has a very strained relationship with his grandparent. The reason of why he has so many problems when it comes to being a good father it is because he himself lacked good family support. It makes sense that he doesn´t seem to know what he is doing or why he is messy when he is takeing care of the turtles.

Speaking of that, this explains why he isn´t very involved in his sons´ training. Maybe he just doesn´t want them to carry the same burden that he did as a child or just dislikes the idea of training them because it reminds him of bad memories about his grandfather and his mother.

He also watches his old movies since it reminds him of the time he was living his life at his fullest and was doing something he enjoyed. It implies he has his mind stuck in the past, perhaps wishing he could still be human and live like superstar.

Splinter´s Character growth

Like i mentioned, Yoshi wasn´t very interested in training his sons at the start of the series. He was negletful and spent too much time watching his movies... This aspect of his character isn´t ignored.

When the turtles asked him to train him ¨The Evil League of Mutants" he put Lou-Jitsu films for them to watch, this made their sons think he wasn´t taking them seriously and decided to go out on their own. While Splinter´s intention was to show them the basics by them learning the moves from the movies, he came off as he only cared about watching said films to their sons.

After noticing how his sons lack experience and need his help, he begans training them. Splinter gets more involved with his Hamato destiny and starts being more honest to the boys about his past as human and protector.

One episode that´s really worth of mentioning is ¨Turtle-dega Nights: The Ballad of Rat Man¨: Splinter tricks Donatello and Mikey into going to a demolition center since he missed the old days he used to be a champion in the Battle Nexus. Donnie is very hurt when he finds out about this because he really wanted to spend more time with his father. By seeing this Yoshi realizes how his sons would like to do things together with him like hanging out. He apologizes to Donnie and tellshim that he may have lied but it is truth he wanted to spend time with him.

Along with getting more involved in his sons´s lives by teaching them and spending time with them, he lets Mikey hang out with Draxum because Mikey considers him part of the family too. (Draxum created them). He didn´t trust Draxum due to their mutual past but decides to give him a chance for Mikey´s sake.

In conclusion: In Rise of the tmnt, Splinter starts as somewhat a neglectful parent figure, sometimes acting childish and not being the best role model for their sons. Overtime he begins to understand the consequences of not training his family and gets more involved in their lives. He tries to be a responsible father despite he had tons of issues with his own family growing up. While very flawed, he has good intentions and cares deeply about his sons.

#tmnt #teenage muntant ninja turtles #rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #Rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #splinter rottmnt #hamato yoshi rottmnt #rise turtles #character analysis #rise fandom #i think i´m going to get flamed for this #anyways if anyones wants to discuss send me ask or DM me

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chrisevansgoodgirl · 4 years

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lips burrow so deep, give me good sleep

summary: requested: (1) Andy Barber insisting reader sits on his face and he makes her come so many times she can barely hold herself up... so he does it for her supporting her back and keeps going. (2) imagine Andy Barber’s reaction to reader wearing one of his old college hoodies with lingerie underneath. He definitely strikes me as the possessive type so seeing you in something so /him/ would definitely set something off in him

warnings: some smut. pretty vanilla shit until the end tbh.

word count: around 3,750

pairing: andy barber x reader

a/n: i can’t believe the show is almost overrrr...i’ll never be over this man tho!

The last time Andy came home early, it was purely under Lynn’s orders. He had a terrible fever that he’d managed to hide from you, his insistence that he not let anyone else manage any part of his case had made him think going to work while sick was a good idea.

So, hearing the door at two in the afternoon was nothing short of worrisome. You had been curled up on the couch with your tablet, resigned to a boring and quiet day until your husband got home. Normally, that was four hours out from two in the afternoon.

“Baby?” you called out. “Is that you or an intruder with a key?”

He snorted. “It’s me.”

You turned curiously, watching him as he went to place his keys and phone on the counter. “What are you doing home early?”

“What are you doing home early?”

“Finished with my most current client, they have simple tastes.” As an event planner, the simple clients were your least favorite.

He sat down next to you on the couch. “Well, I’m sorry to hear that.”

You took his hand, linking your fingers through his. You kissed the back of his hand before asking, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just a bit of a headache.”

“Take your jacket off.”

He lifted his eyebrows. “My jacket?”

You gave him a flat look. “Yes, jacket and tie, off.”

He tossed them carelessly onto the arm of the couch and looked at you.

You pat the blanket that was draped over you. “Lay with me.”

He smiled softly. “It’s surprising when you have pure intentions, Mrs. Barber.”

You snorted as he settled his head on your thighs. He glanced up at you, hands grasping your hips to pull your further down the couch. You smiled. “What are you doing?”

He pulled and pulled until your stomach was level with his head and then laid his cheek against you. This was simultaneously cute and awkward since he didn’t want to lay on your legs, so he draped them over his shoulders.

You scoffed. “Because I’m sure that’s comfortable for you.”

“It is,” he promised.

You ran your fingers through his hair lightly and he hummed.

“Keep doing that, please.”

“Mhm.” You loved when he let you baby him just a little. Usually, he wouldn’t dream of it. You needed to be doted on and spoiled, but there were times when he was tired or felt under the weather, and so he would let you do something for him.

You weren’t sure when you fell asleep, but it was with your fingers buried in his hair. You were both startled awake by the doorbell and the first thing you’d noticed was that the sun had gone down.

You had to complexly slip out from under him so he wouldn’t try running to the door before you.

“Hey,” he protested, voice thick and still sleepy.

You bent down before you dashed away just to kiss his cheek. “Stay.”

The clock along the way told you it was just 6, Massachusetts always got dark earlier in the year than any other place you had lived.

Your neighbor was returning some mail that had been placed in her mailbox and you did the same. It was well established and discussed amongst everyone that whoever was delivering mail was a menace that needed to go. There was a neighborhood petition going around that amused Andy to no end when you told him about it.

He’d asked when you were going to start being a neighborhood housewife. He made it no secret that if you didn’t want to work, you didn’t have to. It wasn’t that you hated your job, you actually loved it, but it was stressful sometimes because you were a perfectionist and, to some extent, a bit of an empath. That was why you got along with him so well. But that was also why you hated letting anyone down ever.

As you walked back to the kitchen counter, you thumbed through the letters in your hand.

“Am I going to have to suggest someone to Clara when she kills the mailman?”

“Stop enjoying this so much.”

“It’s hilarious,” he insisted. “I thought this stuff only really happened on sitcoms. Not that I had the best parental models to go off.”

You glanced over the mail, finding him still laid out on the couch, and tossed it onto the counter. None of it looked immediately pressing. You glanced at the clock. “Do you want me to make dinner?”

“I just ordered something. Lay with me until it gets here.”

You would blame the setting sun for him not noticing what you were wearing until you were back in the living room. He saw your legs first, then his eyes trailed up until they settled on the print of the huge sweatshirt you’d borrowed from his side of the closet.

Andy didn’t have school pride in the traditional sense. He wasn’t the person to go to all the football games or other events, but he had managed to build quite the collection of sweatshirts and T-shirts. He also liked to play with the idea that one day in the future, some of your children would spare his heart and stay home for college, possibly even attend the same place he had.

You had rolled your eyes at him and he’d accused your college of being a “party school”. You wouldn’t humor him with a defense…maybe, mostly, because he was right.

He placed his hand on your hip bone before you could slip back on the couch. “You take that from my closet?”

“No, I actually realized that I want to get my law degree, so I bought my own. I hope you understand, until I’m a lawyer, we can’t have kids—”

“Very funny,” he interjected as he pulled you on top of him. He settled you on his stomach, hands on your inner thighs where he rubbed circles with his thumbs.

You smirked. “But would you be mad at me?”

“No, of course not…but I would insist that you let me help you study every night so we could finish it as soon as possible—”

“Mm. Professor role play? I never would have guessed.”

“So, my wife is a fucking comedian tonight?”

You shrugged. “Maybe.”

“I guess if you were in a tiny plaid skirt, I’d be whatever you wanted me to be.”

“Are you feeling better?” You brushed your fingers along his forehead.

“A little.”

“How much is a little?” you pressed. “Should I refrain from doing this?” You gave his hair just a minor tug. Really, just a little, gentle thing that he decided to blow up.

He snatched your hand out of his hair and bit your palm.

“Ow!” you scoffed. “Andy. I’m just trying to learn how my husband is feeling.”

He took your waist and pressed you back, until he could roll his hips and you would feel him against you. “You tell me. How do I feel?”

“Pulling hair makes you hard?” you teased.

He arched an eyebrow. “Pulling your hair, yes. You try that again and you won’t be able to walk right for a week.”

“Then what is it?”

He narrowed his eyes. “You know.”

“I know everything about you, you’re my husband. That doesn’t mean I don’t want to hear you say it.”

One hand slid from your hip up to your side until he reached your shoulder. He looked sweet and soft for a moment, but just as soon as he got his hand in your hair, that changed. He pulled your head back and bared your neck to him. “Seeing you in my clothes really does something to me.”

You were flushing just a bit, aware of how deeply he was staring at you. You didn’t wear Andy’s clothes often. Either it was so cold that you were bundled up in layers and layers or it was so hot that you were barely wearing anything. You also never anticipated that it would matter so much.

“Get up here.”

You blinked. “What?”

“I want you to sit on my face.”

“You want…where?” He wanted you to sit on his face? You weren’t completely surprised. Andy loved eating you out. He had done so within the first three weeks of your relationship, and hadn’t stopped since you let him start, but you were always lying down. Safely. On your back.

“Baby, sit on my face.”

“I don’t…I’ve never…”

“Yeah, I figured.” The first time he went down on you, he forced you to tell him all about your (very short) history of boyfriends and oral sex. Before him, there had been one. And a half. Of course, you’d never tried anything other than the most basic position.

“We should go upstairs and—”

“Nope. Right here.”

“Andy—”

He grabbed your hips and began moving you up.

“Wait—”

“You trust me?”

“Of course.”

“Well, I’ve got you.”

You weren’t completely sure what you were nervous about, you guys had just never done this. It was an utterly vulnerable position, so it rarely crossed your mind, but when Andy decided he wanted something...

Before you could protest further, he pulled your hips level with his face. You leaned over and caught the arm of the couch with both hands, keeping yourself hovering over him.

“Come on, baby, I know you’ll like it.”

There was never anything he’d done to you that you didn’t like. The last ounce of doubt you had disappeared as soon as he turned his head and kissed your thigh. You suddenly had the strongest desire to feel his beard against your cunt.

You pushed yourself up carefully, arms now at your sides.

His hands slid up your legs until he reached your ass. He yanked you down and wasted no time running his tongue down the length of your slit.

As you settled just a little, his beard began pricking at your skin. It always started out just barely tolerable, but after he’d make you orgasm, it was just another blissful sensation.

You were distantly aware of the uncomfortable position you were in. Your leg nearest the couch was bent at a weird angle, half buried in the couch, half pressed against Andy. He was clearly undeterred by that.

Like most things Andy enjoyed, he was in control. He had you as spread as he wanted you, deciding how much pressure he was going to give you. His hands on your ass dictated whether you could get away from him it became too much, and it would eventually.

He let the tip of his tongue explore you. He didn’t want to overwhelm you, but he also wanted to locate your favorite spots from this new angle. He knew you liked when he slowly slid his tongue up from your entrance to your clit, where he so gently lapped.

As soon as he started sucking, your hands disappeared in his hair. You needed something to hold onto and his hair kept you as close as possible to him. You glanced down for only a moment, unable to hold his intense stare. The way he looked at you, you would swear he had every intention of devouring you.

You let your head fall back, pulling him closer by his hair. He let go of your ass for a moment, encouraging you to sit down as much as you could. When he was satisfied, he locked his hands over your thighs so he could stop you from moving back.

He inhaled deeply, humming appreciatively as he licked you harder.

“Fuck, Andy.”

He hummed again, this time encouragement to keep talking. You moaned about how much you loved him, how good this felt. You didn’t even care that your absolute surrender was giving him future pull if he ever needed to talk you into something.

He took you to the highest peak you had ever reached and kept you there until he was satisfied. You didn’t mind as much as you usually did. He could tease you like it was his career and sometimes, it frustrated you beyond comprehension. This was different, different feelings and different sweet spots. Even the lightest touches were enough to make you whine and whimper for him.

He lifted you up just barley and said, “ride my face, baby.”

Any semblance of control you had was gone with those words. Your hips desperately moved over his lips, his tongue, his jaw, his beard in search of friction for your clit. You no longer worried about putting too much weight on him, you just needed to come.

You were surprised when he let you. You knew your husband and he loved dragging things out. You wouldn’t question him, however, because you didn’t have the mind to. All you knew how to do at that moment was grind your cunt against his mouth.

His beard was sticking your skin almost painfully, but you couldn’t bear the thought of pulling away. You could remember when you first met him, when he actually used to shave often. The only reason he started keeping it around was because you loved it. One of the immediate thoughts you’d had when you first saw it was how it would feel between your thighs, but he didn’t indulge you. He had made you beg for it and it was well worth it.

You were sensitive enough that with certain touches, your hips would buck but he didn’t seem to mind. He met those thrusts by angling his jaw up and rolling his tongue into you. The only sounds in the room were your moans and cries and his tongue trailing through your soaking pussy.

He moved like he was starving, like he was worried that you were going to pull away from him at any second. He was savoring every sound, every pull of his hair, every time you rose up and squeezed your thighs just a little.

You were shaking as he coaxed you to your second finish. That familiar winding sensation was building and you fucked yourself wildly against his open mouth, the only assistance he offered you was with his tongue.

You fell forward, narrowly catching yourself on the arm of the couch once more. Andy didn’t take that as his cue to be sweet or gentle. Instead, he held you tighter, his fingers digging into your ass and outer thigh. He focused his tongue solely on your clit and in seconds, you were coming hard.

But after, that was when he began to tease. He wanted you fucking his face, he wanted you to use him for your pleasure. From this position, you couldn’t do that, you couldn’t take anything, you could only receive. It was a wordless threat delivered by feather-light licks that left you wanting more. If you wanted anything tonight, you would have to get it yourself.

It took several tries to lift one arm and not collapse on top of him. Your body ached at the idea of being laid out underneath him, you couldn’t hold yourself up on your own, but you weren’t done with this yet. Your only option was to want more, that was the only pull he was going to give you. You were on top and in control to an extent, but the second you tried to pull away, he was going to drag you back down. You had nowhere to escape either, no way to shield yourself from him when he wanted to give you more.

When you were on your back, though it didn’t feel like it, you were in much more control. You could push him away, you had an entire mattress to make him chase you. This was all right here, on top of him, held exactly where he wanted you.

You reached back and pried his hand off your hip, lifting it to your waist. He didn’t wait for you to repeat the same with your opposite hand, he sat you up and held you there. You set your own hands on his stomach and he let you lean back just a little.

You watched him slowly run his tongue up and down your cunt, his lips leaving small kisses on your flesh, then sucking noisily at your clit. You watched every little thing he did until you couldn’t stop your hips from rocking against him once more.

Your third orgasm came and went, screaming his name, your head tossed back, your body moving on its own. He let you come down by neglecting your clit in favor of dipping his tongue inside you just enough that you could feel him but were still craving more.

He turned his head to kiss your thigh, turned to the other one to do the same. “Look at me, I want to see your face when you come.” And he continued those soft presses of his lips on both sides until you had situated yourself so he could see your face, your hands over his for more support.

You stared into his eyes the whole time. As he mercilessly sucked your clit, as he led you toward a finish that he wasn’t going to give you just yet, when he would let you come back down by just barely grazing you with his teeth, no tongue, no lips, just these delicate almost-bites on your soaking and sensitive flesh.

He loved seeing your expressions. The way your mouth would fall open when he found one of those really nice spots, the way you bit your lip when you thought you were being too loud, the pout that would settle whenever he didn’t give you the exact thing you wanted, the wrinkle in your forehead when you were frustrated and just wanted to come. But what he really wanted to see was your eyes filled with tears, your mouth open, blurting out unintelligible sounds, and he didn’t stop until that was the case.

When you finished, you were trembling, sobbing his name and many other pleas, once more clutching his hair to pull him as close to you as he could get. He lapped at your clit even after your hips would jerk back, until your eyes were rolling to the back of your head. He hungrily licked into you, desperate to have every last drop of you on his tongue.

You were mindless as he pulled you back over his chest, letting you comfortably settle against him as you came down. But that was the last thing you wanted when you saw how wet his face was, you were dripping down his chin and neck, all the way to the collar of his shirt.

Your hands greedily tore at his belt and pants and he didn’t once help you. Instead, he kept one hand over your ass, holding your aching cunt against his thigh just in case he thought you might need to come again.

You finally got your hand wrapped around his cock, pulling him out of his pants and boxers. You stroked him as you turned your head up and licked over his neck and jaw. You knew he was close when his hips started to move, impatient for your hand to make it all the way down to the base of his cock.

You draped one leg over him, pulling yourself over your arm. You were chest to chest, your hand still working him, your hips hovering just above your forearm, and now you could see his face. When he would say your name, it was soft, it was a sigh or a whisper, a plea to make him come.

“Are you close, baby?” you cooed.

He hummed, eyes shutting as he let out a shuddered breath.

You began nipping at his lips, his jaw, his cheeks. Your mouth brushed against his face when you spoke, “I loved fucking your face.”

“I could tell,” he assured, voice still holding power and control even though he was seconds away from spilling into your hand.

“Tomorrow morning...”

“Mhm,” he encouraged.

“I want you to take your tie and tie my hands behind my back.”

He nodded. “Uh-huh.”

“And then I’m going to get on my knees.”

“Okay,” he breathed, hands gripping whatever part of you was closest. Your ass and your free arm, you couldn’t wait to see the bruises in the morning.

“And I want you to grab my hair,” you flicked your tongue against his lips, he had them shut to silence any of those noises he was desperate to make. “And I’ll open my mouth wide, yeah?”

He nodded, brow furrowing. He was trying so hard to focus on what you were saying. “Yes.”

“And then I want you to bury your cock down my throat—”

“Fuck.” The hand touching your ass lifted and he pulled the bottom of his sweatshirt out of the way. You yelped, mostly in shock, when he spanked you.

You set your forehead against his temple, whispering, “And I want you to fuck my face before you leave for work.”

His hips stuttered. “Fuck, baby. Don’t stop—fuck!” Just as soon as his mouth fell open, you were kissing him. It was a filthy kiss even in the moment, even with your hand around his cock, even with his beard still wet from your pussy. It was tongue and teeth, moaning into one another’s mouth, sharing oxygen, hands grabbing each other violently.

You felt his cum on your ass first, cooling that spot that was still stinging from the contact of his palm. Then it was all over your hand as you continued pumping him until he was soft.

He finally opened his eyes, hazy and so beautifully, deeply blue. His eyebrow arched when you brought your hand up to your mouth and licked him off your fingers.

Before he could say anything, the doorbell rang. “Shit. I forgot I ordered food.” He slid out from under you, eyeing you as you still had your fingers in your mouth.

The sweatshirt had fallen back down, but he leaned over and pushed it out of his way. You shivered as you felt his tongue slowly licking his cum off your ass. He moved back to you, hand grasping your face, fingers pressing on your cheeks until you opened your mouth for him. He leaned in close and spit his cum on your tongue, and then went for the door without another word.

#andy barber x reader #wow i have one more andy request i think #so you can send me more tho bc i am not ready to let him go #!!! how am i supposed to just like...live without him????#my writing

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2manyfandoms2count · 4 years

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#LadynoirJuly Day 22

Slowly but surely making it through the prompts, and trying to end everything as a continuous fic! We’ll see how it goes :D Thanks for the comments on the previous part, it really motivated me to keep doing @ladynoirjuly2020 instead of putting it on hold!

Hope you enjoy this part! xxx

Previous | Next

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Day 22: Realisation

Ladybug walked slowly towards her Home via the rooftops, hands tucked behind her back. The rain was still pouring around her, drops trickling down on her face from her bangs, but she was too deep in thought to pay it any heed. Who cared about potentially catching a cold when you’d just been hit with such crucial information?

She blamed her obliviousness on Chat’s hair. Of course she knew how much a haircut could change someone’s face, the hair length somehow emphasising or toning down one’s facial features, but this was such a wild change. If she ever had an essay to write on the topic (you never knew), Chat would definitely be her exhibit A: heads, Adrien Agreste, model extraordinaire, a teenage heartthrob down to his boy band side part; tails, Chat Noir, Paris’ superhero, his blond mane as unkempt as his manners. Adrien Agreste and Chat Noir. Two sides of the same coin.

It seemed so stupid that she’d never noticed, when there’d been many signs pointing to that conclusion. How Adrien would always disappear during Akuma attacks. She’d always assumed he was just very good at finding hiding places, but thinking back, his excuses often seemed as questionable as her own. How Chat seemed to know the name of her classmates when they were akumatized, although he claimed not to know the Collège Françoise Dupond. How he was very quick to arrive there when it was the scene of an akumatisation. How, everytime she saved Adrien, Chat somehow failed to show up, or did so after she’d made sure the model was well protected. How, thinking about it, she’d never actually seen both Chat Noir and Adrien together in the same place. She’d seen someone wearing an opaque helmet and dressed like Adrien standing behind Chat Noir, but it really could have been any boy their age.

So Chat Noir was Adrien. And Adrien was Chat Noir. Which meant…

Oh for Kwami’s sake. She stopped in her tracks and brought her hands to her face, trying very hard to control her breathing. She was tempted to detransform, so she could talk to Tikki instead of just monologue internally, but she also didn’t feel like walking home in her sundress under the rain. Her costume had the significant asset of being waterproof.

All the time she’d pursued the so-called love of her life by day, she’d been rejecting him by night. She screamed in frustration in her hands. How could she claim to know Adrien, when she hadn’t been able to recognise him when he’d been right by her side all along?

She’d have to step it up if she wanted the feeling of not deserving him that was emerging in her chest to fly away. She knew Chat Noir enough to know he wasn’t kidding around when he said the mask didn’t matter, that he loved her with or without it. Her heart fluttered at the thought that that had been Adrien speaking. He loved her.

She smiled as she wrung the water out of her pigtails on her balcony. She still had a lot of things she’d have to figure out, like how she’d explain how drenched she was to her parents, and how on Earth she was going to face her partner tomorrow because… Well, surprise, surprise, if Chat Noir was Adrien, it meant she would be seeing him a lot sooner than she felt was enough to prepare their next encounter.

Because although there was a chance that the fact Adrien was Chat Noir meant that she might be able to hold a normal conversation with him from now on, she didn’t completely trust herself to make the difference. Worse; there was a chance she’d start stammering every time she hung out with him, even as Chat Noir. Would she even be able to protect Paris in her love struck state?

Boy did she have a long night of overthinking ahead of her.

---

A couple of blocks away from her inner turmoil, Adrien was having the best dinner of his life. For once, he was perfectly content sitting in silence across from his father, eating food that was way too fancy and in portions too small to feed a growing boy. Where he normally would have tried to engage in small talk in yet another attempt to connect with the stern figure who sitting on the other side of the long dining table, tonight his thoughts were elsewhere. He’d even managed to ignore his father’s jab at his lack of punctuality, when he usually would have taken it personally.

He’d figured it out. On his own, without cheating. And it seemed like the best piece of news he’d received since… He tried to remember something that had made him feel this happy, internally jumping up and down, for want of physically doing so. He could think of two: his father letting him go to public school, and knowing he’d righted things with Marinette, that they would be friends.

Marinette… His smile grew larger as he thought about his pigtailed friend. Lovely, kind, amazing Marinette. Thinking about it, it made so much sense that she was Ladybug. The only times his partner had failed to show up in a year had been when he’d helped Marinette with Evillustator, and when she’d been trapped by Weredad. No wonder Marinette was always hanging around close to where they had fought. And hadn’t he once called her their everyday Ladybug? He refrained from laughing at the irony, as his father was already giving him odd looks. He should have thought twice about his choice of words then; he’d really been onto something. Just like Clara Nightingale had been. He couldn’t believe how on point the singer had been. No wonder Marinette had been reticent to take the role, and had ended up finding a solution to avoid appearing in the video as Ladybug.

And if Marinette was Ladybug, no wonder he’d been so lucky at school; he’d had a living and breathing Lucky Charm sitting behind him all along! Not to mention the actual one he carried everywhere, which turned out to have been blessed by his Lady Luck herself.

But if Ladybug was Marinette, then it meant he’d been friendzoning her ever since their first real conversation. It was a word Nino used a lot, and Adrien had only recently discovered what it actually meant. He’d always felt quite curious about Marinette, who could go from a cute shy state to passionately and eloquently standing up for herself or her friends in a matter of seconds. Truth be told, he’d always admired her, and felt something indescifrable when it came to her. He’d been so convinced about his feelings for Ladybug -which still stood- that he’d never bothered untangling his relationship with the other bluenette in his life.

She held a special place in his heart. If he compared her to his closest girl friends, he considered her to be closer than Alya, with whom he spent as much time, if he didn’t count their escapades as Ladybug and Chat Noir. There was something more, a sort of spark, which he guessed he’d sort of felt with Kagami when they’d first met. That had turned out to be a connection due to their similar lifestyles. His link with Marinette felt a lot deeper. Like the one he had with Chloé, despite having interacted a lot less with her and only having known her for a year.

Then again, she was Ladybug; they actually knew each other a lot better than they could have thought, both in and out of costume.

One thing he didn’t know about her, though, was who she liked. He raked his mind for any conversation with anyone that could give him the missing piece of information, but nothing particularly came to mind aside from the fact she liked a boy. It gave him a chance. He’d have to investigate the matter further to measure up the opposition.

For now, though, he thought as he climbed the stairs to his room, he’d just enjoy knowing he’d spend a lot more time with her.

Boy, morning wouldn’t come soon enough.

#ladynoirjuly2020 #ladynoirjuly #ladynoir #ladybug #chat noir #lovesquare #miraculous ladybug #miraculous fanfic #miraculous fanfiction #realisation #realization #elle writes

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sagesparrow394 · 5 years

Text

Coffee Shop AU Fic

Inventive title, I know.

Fandom: Sanders Sides

AUs: Human, Coffee Shop

Summary: Straight out of university, Logan Berry feels like the world is collapsing around him. Having been kicked out by his transphobic boyfriend and stuck alone with a baby on the way, he has no choice but to go live with his cousin. As he starts to get his life back on its feet, however, he’s presented with a second chance at love in the form of a very sweet barista.

Trigger Warnings: Trans pregnancy, light transphobia

“Are you fucking kidding me?! You’d better be!”

“I-I’m sorry, Matthew, I didn’t mean for this to happen!”

“Bullshit! You planned this, didn’t you? Well, fuck it! It was bad enough when you went all switcheroo and said you’re not a girl, you’re a guy! But this? This is the last fucking straw! I want you out!”

“What…?”

“We’re done! GET OUT!”

All this because of two words: “I’m pregnant.”

Now, Logan Berry was stood on the curb outside his apartment block - though he guessed it wasn’t his anymore - with only a small suitcase and a backpack of his stuff. Though tears were trickling down his face, he didn’t make a sound or movement. He was still trying to process everything.

Just out of university, he and his boyfriend bought an apartment together. Just a week later, Logan realised his period was late. He took a test and found he was pregnant. He told Matthew, who immediately kicked him out. Now, he was alone, no home to go to, with the knowledge that he’d have to raise this child on his own.

He just stood there, looking up at the apartment Matthew was in. If only he had just been born biologically male… None of this would have happened…

“Excuse me? Are you okay?”

Logan blinked from his trance, turning to the voice. It was a man, about his age. He had curly blonde hair, a freckled face, light blue eyes and round glasses. His eyebrows were furrowed in concern, a hand resting on Logan’s shoulder.

Logan blinked at him for a moment, registering his presence, his question, and his own situation. After the moment of silence, he broke down into tears. “I-I don’t know wh-what to do… Wh-where do I go…?”

As he sobbed, the other man gave him a look of pity, pulling him into a hug. “Hey, it’s okay… Ssh… Whatever’s going on, I’m sure it’ll turn out okay in the end…”

Usually, Logan wouldn’t trust a stranger this much, but maybe it was the man’s comforting air and kind demeanour, or the emotional pain Logan was in, but he found himself leaning into the other man’s hug. The man’s embrace was the warm, and somehow made Logan comfortable despite him being not big on physical affection.

“I’m Patton, by the way. Patton Foster.”

“L-Logan Berry.”

Patton pulled away from the hug. “I know you don’t know me… but do you need help? Or just to talk? Because I’d be happy to listen. I’m not having the greatest time either… Came downstate for my parents’ funeral.”

Logan shook his head. If this man was mourning the loss of his parents, he shouldn’t load his own problems on him as well. “N-no, it’s okay… I’m, um… starting to feel better, and I know what to do now.”

That was true. In his bout of emotion, he’d been clueless. However, now his head was clear, the answer was simply obvious: his cousin, Thomas Sanders, lived just upstate. Logan was sure if he gave him a call, Thomas would let him stay with him.

“Well, I’m glad to hear that,” Patton smiled. “I should be going, my brother’s waiting for me. Bye, Logan Berry. Hopefully I’ll see you around again sometime.” He gave Logan one last reassuring smile, before turning and walking away.

Logan watched him go, before pulling his phone from his pocket. “... Hey, Thomas? I was wondering if I could stay with you for a while… Yeah, Matthew kicked me out. Why? Well… don’t freak out…”

“How can I be calm?! You’re having a baby! Oh my gosh, I’m gonna be an uncle!”

“Technically, you’ll be their first cousin, once remo-”

“Uncle Thomas. Has a nice ring to it, huh?”

Logan rolled his eyes, chuckling. He had moved in with Thomas, who was definitely pissed at Matthew, but could not be more excited about Logan being pregnant. Logan wasn’t surprised, though, Thomas had always been like this . When Logan came out as transgender, his parents had not had the greatest reaction… Thomas, on the other hand, was fully supportive for him, sending him all sorts of useful things, like pictures of short hairstyles that would suit him, links to sites to buy binders, and sites that explained how to bind safely. All in all, Logan could not ask for a more supportive cousin.

Right now, the two of them were heading to a nearby coffee shop. Upon learning Logan had gained a large craving for chocolate due to his pregnancy, not his usual Crofters preference, Thomas had insisted they go to this cafe, saying they do the best hot chocolate, chocolate cakes chocolate cookies and brownies.

“Ah, yes, a good uncle and role model: a man with a degree in chemical engineering, yet is somehow unemployed,” Logan smirked.

“I’m not unemployed! YouTube is self-employment. Also, aren’t you unemployed?”

“I literally just moved here, Thomas, and I can’t exactly continue my old job given how far upstate it is.”

“True…”

The two arrived at the café, Logan looking up at the sign: Foster Coffee.

“I’m telling you, best café ever,” Thomas smiled, opening the door and stepping in.

Logan followed behind, the scents of bitter coffee, sweet chocolate, lavender, and more wafting over him. His stomach let out a small grumble as he and Thomas wandered up to the counter. His cousin smiled as one of the baristas came over. “Hey, Roman. How’s things?”

“Pretty good. You learnt your lines yet?”

“Almost. Know all the songs though. Lo, this is Roman Foster, we both do community theatre together. He just got a job here, his brother runs the place. Ro, this is my cousin, Logan.”

“Pleasure to meet you,” Roman smiled. Logan gave a nod in response. “So, what are you two having?”

“Two hot chocolates, as well as a cookie and a brownie.”

“Coming right up!”

Roman got to work with their orders, chatting with them, wanting to get to know Logan. However, after a few minutes, someone else slid up to the counter, calling for Roman. They were wearing sunglasses, a black jacket and scrolling on their phone. Roman sighed. “Pat, Remy’s here with his weird orders! Can you finish up Thomas’ while I take Rem’s?”

“On it!” A voice called from the back room. As Roman moved on to serve the customer called Remy, the door swung open, the other barista stepping in. Logan’s eyes widened at the familiar face.

“Hey, Patton!” Thomas greeted.

“Heya, Thomas! Wait…” Patton’s eyes wandered to Logan. “Hi! Logan, right? When said I’d hope to see you around some time, I didn’t expect it to be so soon!”

“You two know each other?” Thomas looked between them both. Patton nodded.

“I ran into him a week or so ago downstate. Are you two brothers?”

Logan shook his head. “No, cousins actually.”

“But we have a more brotherly relationship than cousinly one.”

“Is cousinly even a word?”

“Doesn’t matter.”

Patton let out an adorable little chuckle that made blood rush to Logan’s cheeks.

Oh dear god, no no no, he could not be developing a crush. Not after Matthew… Just because Patton had been kind and caring when they first met didn’t mean he wasn’t going to be just like Matthew. It was likely Logan’s ‘crush’ was just due to hormones from the pregnancy. Also, natural animal survival instincts were likely causing him to latch onto a new person to assist him during the pregnancy. Yes that was it. No real romantic feelings at all, just hormones and ‘animal brain’.

Definitely.

Patton finished up their order, chatting all the time, before Logan and Thomas headed over to a table with their food and drinks.

“You like him.”

“What?!” Logan gasped. Had his cru- I mean, hormone-induced, totally-not-real attraction been that obvious? “Nonsense. Do you honestly think I’d jump right back into a relationship after Matthew? I don’t even know Patton, what if he ends up being just like Matt?”

Thomas gave him a sympathetic smile. “I know Pat, and I can promise he’s nothing like that asshole. Pat’s kind, funny, accepting and the sweetest little puffball ever. I think he’d be great for you.”

“Well, unfortunately, I’m not attracted to him. And even if I was, I wouldn’t get back into dating so soon after a breakup.”

It took Logan four months before he returned to the coffee shop for another visit. He’d been too busy with all sorts of things: applying for jobs, going to interviews for said jobs, apartment hunting so he wouldn’t have to invade Thomas’ space for too long, and of course preparing everything for the baby. He didn’t have much time to relax.

That day in particular, Thomas was filming a video for his YouTube channel, so Logan needed to be out the house. He figured that he should take the chance to relax with a nice hot chocolate and chocolate muffin. Stress wasn’t good for the baby, after all.

As he stepped inside the café, he smiled at the wonderful scents. He went forward up to the counter, rubbing his baby bump soothingly, feeling the child moving inside. He’d first felt them moving just two days before, almost crying when it happened. Okay, maybe not almost. More like sobbed his eyes out until Thomas had run out of tissues.

It wasn’t long until a barista came up to him. Last time he came, Patton and Roman had been the only baristas there. It seemed they’d hired someone else.

“Hey, what can I get ya?” the barista asked, adjusting his purple bangs so they were over his eyes.

“A hot chocolate and chocolate muffin please.”

“Oh, I can take this one, Virge!” Patton came over, smiling at Logan and his co-worker. “You mind heading to the back and grabbing some more coffee beans?”

“No problem,” the barista, ‘Virge’, replied before heading through the door behind the counter.

Patton just smiled at Logan. “Been a while, huh? It’s good to see you again, Lo!”

“You too, Patton,” Logan replied. “Was that a new employee?”

“Yep! We hired Virgil just last month. Speaking of which, why’ve you not come here in so long? I was hoping you’d become another of our regulars.”

“I’ve been very busy. Job and apartment hunting… Just everything to set up our new life here.”

Patton raised an eyebrow curiously. “Our? Who’s taking away the y from that word? Do… do you have boy or girlfriend?”

Logan tried his best to ignore the downcast inflection of the last question before responding. “Oh, no, I’m single. I’m talking about this little one.” He took a step back, revealing the baby bump to Patton, who let out an excited gasp.

“Oh my gosh! You’re having a baby? That’s amazing! How far along are you?”

“Four and a half months.”

“You’re so lucky, I’ve always wanted to have a kid. I just haven’t had the time to look into adoption, not to mention I’d rather wait until I have a boy or girlfriend.”

“Understanda- ” Logan stopped mid-word. Patton’s eyebrows furrowed.

“Lo? You okay?”

“They kicked.”

“Huh?”

“The baby… the baby kicked!” Logan’s eyes were glistening, his hands resting on his stomach. Patton didn’t hesitate, immediately coming around the counter and placed his hands by Logan’s. As he did, there was a small tap underneath.

“Oh, Lo… You’re so lucky to have this little miracle…” He looked up at Logan before fishing some napkins from behind the counter. “Here.”

“Th-thank you…” Logan replied, taking them and blowing his nose and wiping his eyes. “You’re too kind, Pat…”

“Nonsense. There’s no limit for kindness,” Patton replied, guiding Logan to sit down at a nearby table. “I’ll go finish up your order. You have some time with your little angel.” He turned and headed back behind the counter.

Logan just sat there, rubbing his stomach, occasionally feeling kicks. The smile wouldn’t leave his face, and he watched as tears dropped from his cheeks and onto his shirt. After a few minutes, Patton came back, placing Logan’s order on the table as well as handing him more tissues. He then took the seat opposite Logan at the table. “You said you were single… If you don’t mind me asking, who’s the father?”

Logan’s smile faltered as he wiped his eyes. “My ex, Matthew… He broke up with me after finding out I was pregnant. He also revealed himself to be a secret transphobe in the process.”

“Oh… Lo, I’m so sorry…”

“Don’t apologise… You helped me a lot. When you ran into me for the first time, it was just after Matt kicked me out. You made me feel so much better. I needed that hug and the comfort you gave me. I thank you so much for that.”

Patton gave a bittersweet smile, reaching over the table and taking one of Logan’s hands in his. “I’m glad I could help. Are you sure you’ll be okay?”

Logan was silent a few seconds, just looking at their hands, before blinking back to reality. “Oh, um, yeah… It’s been four months, I’m over it.”

“Well, that’s good!” Patton gave Logan a big smile. “I’m sure you’ll find the one, Lo. Who knows, maybe they’re closer than you think.”

“Yeah, I think he is…”

“Huh?”

“Nothing! Don’t you think you should get back to work?!”

“Hey, Lo! How’re you?”

Logan just groaned as he leant on the counter. “A week late. Seven whole days, and no baby. I’m sick of it… I’ve got an apartment of my own, their room’s all set up, I have a job ready to go after maternity leave. Everything’s ready for them, but they won’t come…!” He sighed. “I just wanna be able to have Crofters again without throwing up…”

“Just gonna put it out there,” Roman came up and stood next to his brother. “Apparently, having sex is supposed to make babies come.”

“Roman!”

“He’s right,” Virgil added, joining the conversation. “It is supposed to work.”

“I don’t think I’ll be trying that, thank you very much,” Logan replied, face flushed, refusing to look Patton in the eye. “Any other tips, however, would be greatly appreciated.”

“I think spicy food is supposed to work?” Roman offered. “But apart from that, I’m all out of ideas.”

“I’m sure it won’t be long, Lo,” Patton smiled. “And I’m sure, when they come, you’ll forget all the hardship when you’re holding that precious little bundle in your arms.”

How did Patton have the ability to make anything undeniably cute?!

“I guess that is true… Thank you, Patton.”

“It’s nothing, Logi!”

That smile… so cute…

“...D-Did you just call me cute?”

You said that out loud? Fuck, Logan, you said that out loud! Stupid fucking baby brain! Come on, don’t just stand there, say something!

“I… Um, I just… It was, uh…”

And it was at that exact moment that Logan’s water broke.

Logan couldn’t take his eyes off the bundle of blankets in his arms as Thomas drove him home from the hospital. He smiled every time the child let out a little coo or an adorable giggle. His baby, his son...

The two cousins headed up the stairs before arriving at the door to Logan’s apartment. Thomas took the liberty of opening the door as Logan’s hands were full, and as they stepped inside, Logan’s eyes widened.

Patton, Roman and Virgil were all already there.

“They insisted they wanted to come see you the minute you were out of hospital,” Thomas explained as the three visitors came and stood around Logan.

“Oh, he’s beautiful…” Roman cooed.

“You gotta be proud, teach,” Virgil smiled.

“What’s his name?” Patton asked.

“Evan.”

Roman gasped. “Like Evan Hansen!”

Logan groaned as everyone else chuckled. “No, he is not named after a character from one of your silly musicals.”

“They are not silly!”

“Hey, Roman, ease up a little,” Patton scolded. “Logan’s had a rough couple of days. Also… there’s something serious Lo and I need to talk about.”

“Oh…” Logan’s stomach twisted. After everything that happened that day, Logan had completely forgotten about the incident just before his water broke. “Look, Patton, I’m sorry, it was a slip of the tongue, I didn’t mean to- ”

“Lo, ssh,” Patton interrupted him. “I… I, erm… I think you’re cute too.”

“You-?” Logan was interrupted yet again and Patton pressed his lips to Logan’s. Logan’s eyes widened, stunned, before they fluttered closed and he leaned into it. After a few moments, they pulled away, and there was a silence…

“Welp, Roman, Thomas, you both owe me fifty bucks each.”

Roman and Thomas groaned, glaring at Virgil, who smirked cockily.

“Don’t get all pissed at me! It’s your fault for betting in the first place.”

“Language!” Patton scolded. “There’s a child here!”

“You bet on us?” Logan raised an eyebrow condescendingly.

“These two bet they could set you up. I bet against them, saying it would happen without them interfering,” Virgil explained. “I was right, and now I have an extra a hundred dollars in my pocket.”

Logan rolled his eyes, but smiled as he felt Patton’s arms wrapping around his waist. He leant into the embrace, holding a sleeping Evan close to his chest.

“I love you, Logibear…” Patton smiled.

“I love you too, Pattoncake.”

“Aww, they’re making pet names for each other already!” Roman let out a small squeal. However, the noise caused Evan to wake, shifting in Logan’s hold.

“You think he’s hungry?” Patton asked. “I can make him up a bottle of milk.”

“No need,” Logan responded, sitting down and going to unbutton his shirt. “Oh, um, are you all okay with me breastfeeding in front of you guys? It’s just better for cognitive development than bottled milk, so I find it worth the potential short period of dysphoria- ”

The others all nodded, saying it was perfectly fine, though Patton sounded a little concerned at the mention of dysphoria. Logan gave an appreciative smile, reassuring Patton that the dysphoria really wasn’t that bad: after all, he’d gotten used to it with not wearing his binder for a majority of the pregnancy.

Roman suggested they have a movie night to celebrate the baby’s arrival - gotta introduce them to Disney early - and the canonicity of the Logicality ship. Patton thought it was sweet they had a ship name for them, Logan thought it was rather stupid.

Anyway, they chose a movie - Winnie the Pooh, as Patton said it was likely the most family friendly for Evan - and all bunched up on the couch, Thomas having grabbed snacks from the kitchen.

Logan had been longing to have Crofters again for so long, staring at the jars on the table, but unable to pick one up with Evan in his arms. Patton took notice, picking up a jar and a spoon, and started feeding spoonfuls to Logan.

“Practicing for when you officially become Evan’s other father, Pat?” Roman asked, smirking. Logan’s face burned bright red, but Patton responded with a deadpan expression.

“Shouldn’t you be practicing for when you officially become his uncle?”

Thomas couldn’t help but snort at how red his cousin’s face had become. Logan started buttoning his shirt back up. “Y-you know, Evan’s looking pretty sleepy, I should go put him to bed.” He got up and hurried from the room, burping Evan as he went.

“I think you made him overly flustered, Pat,” Virgil pointed out the obvious.

“He’ll be fine,” Thomas reassured. “Just give him a chance to cool o- ”

Patton was already leaving the room, heading to follow Logan. As he stepped into Evan’s bedroom, his eyes widened. So much work had been put into the room. The ceiling was black and had glow in the dark rainbow stars all over it, arranged accurately to constellations. The walls were blue, and there was a solar system mobile over the cot. Logan was tucking Evan in whilst quietly singing. Singing a song very familiar to Patton.

“When I see the way you act Wondering when I'm coming back I could do about anything I could even learn how to love like you…”

Patton quietly stepped further into the room as Logan sang, mesmerised. His voice was so smooth, calming… He’d give Roman a run for his money.

As Logan came to the end of the song, Patton wrapped his arms around his waist, making the father jump.

“It’s okay, Logi, it’s just me. Your singing was beautiful.” He gave Logan a small kiss on the cheek. “By the way… I’m sorry if I freaked you out earlier. I don’t know why I said it, we literally just got together, I- ”

“Pat, it’s okay. In fact, I couldn’t be happier to find out you see us getting married in the future.” He turned in Patton’s hold so they were facing each other. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too.”

The two leant forward, their lips meeting, Logan’s hands going to rest on Patton’s cheeks. They stayed there for a bit, just enjoying the moment, until a knock on the door signalled them to pull away.

“Sorry for interrupting,” Thomas apologised, stepping inside, “but we have a serious mission. Operation Glasses Gays is complete. Now, I need your help with Operation My Chemical Roman-ce.”

Taglist: @part-of-me-do-not-know-the-rest, @why-should-i-tell-youu2

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timetravelingheart · 5 years

Text

Consequences Chapter Eight: A.M. Imagine

“You’re kidding.”

“I promise you I’m not, Tess.”

“I’m going to cry.”

“I figured as much.”

“Why?”

“Because when Lydia asked what I had planned so she could ‘approve’ or whatever, she said you’d cry.”

“I’m going to kill her.”

“She said it’s a happy cry. She said when you do things like this, that’s a normal reaction for you.”

“It is.”

“So this is okay?”

“Mhm.”

“Tess.”

“Yes,” she nodded. “Definitely okay.”

“Okay, then let’s go,” he held out his hand for her to grab as they walked out of the parking lot towards the building.

Tessa couldn’t believe it. For their first (ish) date, Auston had brought her to a horse farm just outside of the city. He knew that she had horses growing up and that she missed them whenever she was in the city for too long. This was amazing.

“Welcome!” the owner, James, greeted them as they got to the front doors to the stable, reaching out to shake their hands. “I’m James, I’ll be assisting you today. Thanks for joining our stable.” He turned to Tessa. “I heard we have an experienced rider joining us today.”

“Yes, I’ve been riding for as long as I can remember,” Tessa nodded, trying to calm her excitedly shaking body as they talked.

“That’s fantastic. And you?” James turned to Auston.

“I rode once on a school trip when I was twelve,” Auston shrugged.

Tessa turned to him in surprise.

“What?” he asked cluelessly.

“You planned a horse-back riding date even though you barely know how to ride?”

“Yeah,” he shrugged, unbothered. “So?”

“Why?” Tessa prodded.

“Because you’ve mentioned your horses a few times on the phone and I know it will be a while before you go home to them. Besides, I figure that you’ll love it and I’ll get to try something new with you here. Win-win,” he answered like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Tessa just stared at him, head tilted, as if she was searching for something more. “What?”

“Nothing,” she whispered, a small smile crossing her face.

“All set to meet the horses?” James interrupted.

Tessa curled her arm under Auston’s and linked their fingers.

“Yep!”

After two hours of meeting the horses (and yes, Tessa cried when she instantly connected eyes with the one she ended up riding, resulting in Auston double-checking ‘this is a happy cry, right, Tess?’), helping clean their stables, and riding them, they started to pack it in. Auston actually wasn’t that bad on a horse. Once he relaxed and learned to trust his horse, he was a natural. They shared a few laughs as they trotted around the field together with their respective horses. Auston loved the unbridled, childlike joy that moved through Tessa’s soft features the entire afternoon.

While Auston had gone off to the bathroom, Tessa talked to James about the stables and the organization.

“Did you not have any other riders scheduled for today?” Tessa asked, only now noticing how quiet the stables were.

“Oh, your boyfriend booked the whole afternoon.”

“What?” Tessa didn’t know if she was more shocked by the boyfriend tag or what Auston did. She focused on the latter instead of dissecting the former.

“Yeah,” James nodded. “He bought it out. Made a sizeable donation to our animal foundation as well.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah, that donation will go a long way to keeping our resources stocked and as we move into the down season. Good guy you have there,” James was obviously impressed.

“Yeah,” she whispered, more to herself than to James. “He is.”

“Anything else I can do for you, Miss Hart?”

“No, that’s all. Thank you so much. I had the best time today.”

“My pleasure. You have the whole afternoon here though. Mr. Matthews said you had a picnic lunch planned, so I recommended heading over to the pond. It’s a beautiful place. Let me go get your cooler.”

Just as James was leaving, Auston returned.

“Everything okay?” he asked as he saw the odd look on her face. Tessa turned to him and pulled him into a tight hug; Auston accepted the show of affection immediately. “What’s this for?”

“Just a thank you,” Tessa smiled up at him and pecked him on the cheek.

“Here’s your cooler,” James returned and handed the item to Auston. “Enjoy the rest of your afternoon. I’ll be in the stables or main office if you need anything.”

“Thanks again,” Auston reached out to shake his hand.

“No, thank you. Good luck this season!” James nodded at them and headed back to the horses. Tessa turned to Auston with a smile on her face.

“So, a picnic lunch, huh?” she teased.

“Yeah, yeah. It was supposed to be a surprise.”

“It still was. Let’s go find that pond, yeah?” she tugged on his hand to follow her and Auston knew at that moment that he probably would have followed her anywhere.

They found the pond and settled onto a blanket by the water, eating what Auston had packed and just enjoying each other’s company. Once they were both full, they laid back on the blanket, watching the clouds and talking about nonsense, playing with each other’s hands and fingers.

“You’re a great listener, you know that?” Tessa stated out of the blue. Auston turned to her with a questioning look on his face.

“What do you mean?”

“You remember so many random things I’ve told you, like how I’m not a morning person, how I like to go home and shut out the outside world after a long day, how much I love horses…”

“Tess, I remember because I care. My mom always said that communication is the number one key to any successful relationship, and that starts with listening. So, I just try my best.”

“Well, you would definitely make your mom proud.”

“I hope so. She’s an incredible role model and my parents have such a strong relationship. I know they have issues, I’m not that naïve. All couples do. But they always work through them by talking about it and just by being on the same team every time.”

“I love that.”

“Me too,” Auston smiled at her. “Has your dad ever dated?”

Tessa rolled on to her side to face him and rested her head on her hands.

“He’s gone on a few dates, and I know his friends have tried to set him up a few times, but nothing really stuck. Well, he had a girlfriend for about a year, but I don’t think they ever made it official,” Tessa shrugged.

“Would you be okay with him dating?”

“Oh, definitely. It’s been almost 14 years since my mom passed away. I hate the idea of him ending up alone, especially since it’s just the two of us. I mean, he has my uncle and cousins, so he’s not alone, but I want him to find love again. My parents were high school sweethearts.”

“Really?”

“Mhm. They were together since they were 14 years old. Insane, I tell you. But my dad always says they were perfect for each other,” Tessa’s eyes watered as she thought of her dad alone.

Auston inched himself closer to her, pulling her to his chest as he lay flat on his back. Tessa curled into him with ease, sniffling lightly.

“I used to think he was worried about how I would feel, but now I think he’s almost just settled into the idea that he’ll be alone. There’s the sweetest lady in his bowling league who has the biggest crush on him, and makes it known, but I think he’s hesitant. My uncle keeps me in the loop if my dad doesn’t,” Tessa chuckled.

“A bowling league? That’s amazing. We should go bowling!”

“I,” Tessa paused for dramatic effect, “would crush you.”

“Oh, you would now, would you?” Auston tickled her sides, holding her tight to him as she tried to squirm away.

“Okay, okay, stop,” she screeched, trying to catch her breath. When he stopped, she curled back into him.

“So tell me about a dream you have that’s not related to hockey,” Tessa changed the subject.

“That’s a great question,” Auston paused to think of an answer. “I try not to think too much about the future. I like to live in the moment as much as possible and just enjoy being young and living my dream.”

“I can respect that, but there has to be something that you think about or want to do.”

“I really want to travel. Like, more than just going to a resort.”

“You can do that in the summer, can’t you?”

“Yeah,” Auston nodded in agreement. “But I prefer to go back to Arizona. I love it there and I’m gone so much that I like to be home with my parents, sisters, grandma, friends, Nala…”

“Your dog?”

“Now who is the great listener?” Auston pecked the top of her head as she grinned up at him with a shit-eating grin. “She’s getting old though, still as crazy as ever, but old. So I like seeing her whenever I can.”

“That’s adorable,” Tessa loved a good animal-lover. “Would you travel somewhere with your family?”

“Yeah, we’ve talked about it, but my sisters have a lot going on in their own lives too and I like to be there to support them.”

“Okay, let’s go back to the dream aspect of this, not the reality version. Where would you want to go if you could go anywhere?”

“Anywhere. I did a little traveling when I lived in Switzerland, but there’s so much more of Europe to see. And anywhere in Asia - I’ve never been there at all. Do you want to travel?”

“Yes! I love traveling,” Tessa gushed. “Summers were the busiest farm seasons though, so summer trips beyond out east or out west for a few weeks to visit family weren’t really in the cards. I did a study abroad program in England during my third year of undergrad though, and I was hooked. I got to explore Europe quite a bit but I’d love to go back now that I’m older and not on as much of a shoestring budget.”

“That’s fair. I really want to climb Machu Piccu. That’s a goal, and then Mt. Fuji.”

“I would love to do both of those, too!”

“What’s one of your travel goals?”

“I have two specific ones, and they’re of a similar nature. I want to visit Africa and go on a safari. And I want to go to an elephant sanctuary in Thailand. There’s one called Elephant Nature Park. The owner rescues elephants who have were torn from their families and used for riding, for shows, chores, etc. They’ve often been abused and unloved and she takes them in and cares for them, no expectations. They just get to roam and enjoy their lives.”

“That sounds incredible.”

“I know. And of course, I’d probably cry,” Tessa laughed.

“Lydia said you cry at pretty much anything animal-related,” Auston recalled.

“Lydia is right, as usual. I cry at pretty much anything though.”

“I really admire that about you,” Auston mused thoughtfully.

“What?”

“You’re so in tune with your emotions and you just seem so naturally empathetic.”

“I get it from my dad. He’s the strongest man I know and yet at the core of it all, he’s a big ole softie. He taught me that emotions aren’t weakness. He went to therapy after my mom and sister passed when he could have just buried himself in his work. My uncle told me years later that he went because he didn’t know how to deal with his own grief and also help me with mine. He got us both through it.”

Auston placed a kiss on her forehead.

“He sounds like an amazing man.”

“He is. He’s my favourite person in the whole world.”

“I really need to get him tickets to a game.”

“One day,” Tessa laughed.

Auston reached a hand out to gingerly tilt Tessa’s head up towards him. He placed a slow, sweet kiss on her awaiting lips, reveling in the moment when he could feel her smile against him. He knew from the moment he met her that she was special, but he had no idea he was going to fall this fast and this hard for her. The thought terrified him more than he wanted to admit, but he pushed the fear down and decided to just be in the moment with her, like he said he preferred to do. She was incredible and he was going to enjoy every minute he had with her.

When he pulled away, he opened his eyes to see her gazing up at him.

“Good date?”

“Mhmm,” she nodded. “Thank you.”

“Well, it doesn’t have to be over so soon,” Auston said, not quite ready to leave her. “I really don’t have much planned beyond this. I wasn’t sure if you’d be tired of me by now. But if you’re not, we could keep hanging out? Enjoy this beautiful weather while it lasts?”

“I’d like that,” Tessa pecked his lips and then his nose before rising to her feet and reaching her hands out to pull him (or attempt to) his feet.

“Let’s go.”

_____

10 minutes later.

“I swear when I looked at the weather it didn’t say anything about rain,” Auston explained. So much for enjoying the weather.

Fortunately, they made it to his car before the sky opened up, but now they sat, rain pounding heavily around them, debating their next move.

“We could go back to my place and watch Netflix?” Auston mused, hoping he wasn’t pressing his luck.

Tessa thought carefully about it. And then she was reminded of Lydia’s words from the previous day. Do whatever feels natural.

“Yeah, let’s do that,” she smiled at him.

#auston matthews #auston matthews imagine #auston matthews fan fiction #nhl fan fiction #nhl imagines #hockey fan fiction #hockey imagines

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asecretsummer-rpg · 4 years

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Name: Julie Tayor Age: 37 Sexuality: Lesbian Gender: Female Portrayed By: Katherine Moennig Availability: Closed

“I just want this over so everything can go back to normal.”

→ Background

Phoebe and Zachary’s aunt Julie has been like a second mother to them both ever since their mum passed away after battling an illness when they were kids. She and her brother, minister of a local church, have always been pretty close. Julie isn’t religious at all despite the fact they were brought up in the same household by their Christian parents but that’s never been a problem for the two. Her brother isn’t one of those people who takes religion to the extremes, which this town does have a few of sadly, and Julie has always been able to be herself. As has her nephew and niece, who came out as lesbian years ago. Julie does sometimes wonder, however, if her nephew really accepted his sister’s sexuality but she always just figured she was being silly. Zachary is very protective of Phoebe and Julie just lets her imagination run riot sometimes. It’s hard to trust people and their motives after everything she’s seen.

She’s worked as a police officer for the local police department since she was twenty-eight years old. She takes pride in her position and the work the force does around Baberton, even though a lot of people nowadays have lost some faith in the police department due to a string of events involving a serial killer… and the way the department handled the murder of Annie Pierce - saying the girl had run away without much evidence to back that up, when her body was really buried in the woods for years. Julie knows that many people don’t trust the police anymore and she’s determined to change that any way she possibly can.

→ Back to Baberton

Everybody thought that the killing was over when Daisy Ramsey confessed and killed herself by jumping off the roof of a building with Annie’s old friends as witnesses. It started up again, however, months later and eventually Jamie Kirk was outed as the killer... but then, just as the town took a breath of relief, it somehow started up again. The mayhem and the murder. Work is hard right now, with little to no leads to follow, and she knows that the town is losing hope and patience. Years ago, she and another officer called Bradley, were secretly been assigned protective detail of Annie Pierce’s old friends (Imogen Ford, Ruby Peterson, and Kelly Sharpe), after Imogen Ford was attacked one night in the high school during a storm. Julie and Bradley were given this task by Chief Constable Gregory Sharpe himself, Kelly’s father, who entrusted them with the safety of the girls and Julie was determined not to let him down. Sometimes she and Bradley would work together and sometimes they would separate, following one girl each while keeping tabs on the third wherever possible. It’s important the girls (and whoever may be out to get them) don’t know she and her partner are there so Julie takes this very seriously. They were pulled back from this work a short while ago and now with Kelly’s suicide, Julie is eager to try and get this taken up again - those two remaining girls need protection.

When she’s not working she does her best to keep up with her family, her brother and his kids, though one of the victims was her own nephew, poor Zachary, and Julie often blames herself. She was determined to keep the streets of Baberton safe for them, so they don’t have to live the rest of their lives in fear of murder, and she wanted nothing more than to be a good influence for them, a role model in the absence of their mother. Her brother does his best and he’s an amazing father but sometimes you just need a woman’s touch and Julie is always there to offer help and support when needed. Phoebe is so important to her now and Julie is determined to keep her safe.

→ What’s Her Secret?

She doesn’t fully trust Bianca Averina, the station’s PR liaison and thinks that she’s hiding something. She doesn’t like the jokes Bianca makes about her and Leo being the only ones who really do anything round the station. The woman just rubs Julie up the wrong way and she’s started looking into her background when she has time, sure there’s something that she’s not telling them. Julie usually has very good instincts and she knows when to listen to them.

She found evidence that points to Alexandra Willis, her colleague and friend, tampering with evidence. She was using Alexandra’s computer during a storm a couple of years ago, when her own was down, and she noticed some files had been locked in a folder. She couldn’t open it but she received a text message from somebody calling themselves “-A” that led her to believe the files have evidence in them linking to the Leanne Wilmington murder case… and she doesn’t quite have enough evidence to go to the Chief as the folder on Alexandra’s computer was soon deleted… but she’s not one to let things go and she’s determined to get to the bottom of this.

If she sees the girls out in the street, despite there not being an official protection detail assigned to Ruby or Imogen, Julie has a habit of going into protector mode anyway, going back into the mindset she’d have to have had for that job a few years ago. She really does think they’re major targets and need someone watching them until this insanity is over (if it ever is).

#secrets rp #bio rp #horror rp #slasher rp #katherine moennig #takenf

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illustrache-blog · 5 years

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SPOILER ALERT: The Iron Throne Belongs to...

“Two roads diverged in a wood, and I— I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.” -Robert Frost

If you grew up anything like me, you were born into a life that was pre-decided for you. You go to school - aiming for those straight A’s, then apply to the best universities so that you can graduate and hold a degree that displays how literate you are, being oblivious to the possibility of ending up in a completely different profession than your major. But if Brian May, didn’t give up on his Ph.D. in Astrophysics, half-way, only to go back and complete it years later, the world wouldn’t have a Queen.

For those of us who aren’t as brilliant or musically talented as Brian May, let’s get back to the grind - you move on to medical, law or grad school and get a master’s because that will guarantee a job. Chances are, you will hate the very same job you worked so hard for, but have to stick with it because you need the money from all the student loans, right? That is, assuming you didn’t find yourself a sugar-daddy or work as a part-time stripper.

What’s next? Get married? Have kids? Raise those kids and work yourself to death? Unless you happen to be one of the few brave-hearts that said, “screw you, society,” and decided to go ahead and do your own thing or your parents are really rich and you’re going to inherit their possessions anyway - or you’re a serial killer, you must relate to some of this.

Personally, I am in the hustling phase - about to graduate in three months, thinking about “what’s next” while trying to maintain a social life, a healthy diet and 8 hours of sleep.

This is where I try to gain some perspective about my life and my choices.

If you ask me about my five-year-plan, I will say “I don’t know” because I do not have one. Unfortunately, I am not one of those people that has every detail about my life figured out. Actually, who really does? All it takes is getting run over by a car because you decided to run the light so that you could make it in time for class/work - boom! your five year plan is dead, even if you survive.

While I figure out my post-grad plans, I am trying to ensure that I don’t delve into society's expectations of me. Society might say “go get a job” and by job they mean “a real job” even if it isolates you from being you. For instance, what if I decide to say “forget about finding a job, I am going to take a plane to France to visit the Notre Da-” Oops!

The point I am trying to make here is that the rules, standards and boundaries that society validates might not apply to you - and that is okay. If you are up to the challenge of pursuing what you really want and it makes you happy, it is valid. You don’t have to follow the bandwagon just because everyone else does. Perspective. Even if you aren’t on the road that most people chose, you are not alone. Robert Frost took the same road and now he is in every high school/college English literature curriculum. If Frost isn’t the role model you’re looking for, Apple’s 1997 Advertising campaign will give you more people to look up to, who fought their own battles and made history:

youtube

It is important to realize that the road to being different comes with its own challenges. It is not going to be easy. In fact, it could be worse than you imagined, mainly because you are in charge. You make the rules. You overcome your own barriers. You do what’s right for you - since there is no given formula to make it to the top unless you find one yourself, which comes with trial and error.

A significant factor that mutually exists in the stories of most successful figures is their ability to listen to themselves over what others told them to do. There is no doubt, you have to be courageous to take a step. Take it from the Bible, if not from me. Isn't that what God told Moses when he led the Israelites escape Egypt and ended up splitting apart the Red Sea? You have to trust the process. You have to be prepared for the worst outcomes and you must be able to cancel out the “noise” including society, your peers and most importantly the negative voices in your own head that tell you you’re not good enough. Above all, you must be able to maintain your own perspective.

No, you don’t have to have your life together by 30 because society says you should. You don’t have to have kids before you’re ready because everyone else thinks it’s the best time to do so. You don’t have to prove yourself to people that do not matter. You don’t have to succumb to pressure that will make you detest your life and fill it with regrets - so much, that you only begin to survive rather than live. You don’t have to give up on your dreams so that you can “fit in.”

Society’s expectations may greatly differ from your own. You can choose to try and please the people around you, and still not please everyone. However, you most definitely can choose to please yourself and succeed. Even if you don’t, you tried. This does not apply if you’re some kind of psychopath or associated with an extremist group. If blowing up the twin towers is the type of thing that makes you happy, please borrow someone else’s perspective in life.

Don’t get me wrong. Rules exist for a reason and they might lead you to your destination, but you are allowed to navigate the route of your own life’s journey. It all depends on your point-of-view. In other words, perspective. For anyone that hates reading, doesn’t care or has more important things to do, such as get a Ph.D. in Astrophysics, let me leave you with one of my favorite quotes-

“Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars.”

― Norman Vincent Peale

Finally, I would like to say, you’ve GOT this. The iron-throne is yours. You rule!

If you made it all the way to the end, here’s a link to a great song on perspective, “Living in the Moment” by my all-time-favorite artist, Jason Mraz:

youtube

Thank you for taking the time to read this post.

Thank you for being you.

#perspective #life #gameofthrones #spoilers #music #selfcare #quotes #creative #illustration #travel #positivity #art

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mrsandok · 3 years

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Making Sense of Good Things

My heart has been full with nothing but positivity lately. For myself, my friends, and for what’s to come. Nevertheless, there’s some serious stress attached to these early days of this new stage in my life.

Ever since taking up Buddhism, it’s been an exercise in learning what makes me happy and what doesn’t. I’m finally able to begin to articulate what makes me happy and how to maintain it. There’s definitely some grueling parts of the introspective effort to look at my life when confronting the things I don’t like about myself; nevertheless, it’s healthy to acknowledge and move toward change.

Stoicism has also helped knowing that I’m not in control of a lot of things in my life and I’ve learned to accept that. I’ve always sought complete control in different, if not all, parts of my life. It’s been an active effort to…just…let…things…be.

I’m happy my friends are in a similar place in life with me. Mayo just got a UX job. Bryan is settling back in Cali. Sean is finishing a two year music project. Taro is settling into his PhD program. And me...

I feel like I’m a new teacher again.

I went from a 20+ person department to a department of 6. Not only that, being back in person with a full classroom for the first time since March ‘20 is surreal.

Students and staff alike are trying to find their footing. Some are faking the funk saying that they have it handled. Others, like me, are open with how hard this shit is.

It’s so different. I dedicated 16 years of my life to English.

I felt pretty far removed to those 16 years during the first few days. The class demographics are so different. I have English learners, different grade levels, a variety of mild to severe students with special needs...with...one...curriculum of art/photography.

It’s wild.

I want to be selfish and think solely about myself and continue to do my thing like I was doing during summer but I have a job to educate these students and not disappoint their families or the administration that trusted me with this position.

I’m slowly settling in and enjoying the moment for what it is: Weird and funny while reminding myself that I’m in it for the long haul.

Summer Sandōk is 290 days away.

Some shit that’s amusing to me:

- I’ve always found it weird to ask another person permission to use the bathroom. I’m sure it’s weird for them…having been at home for a year and a half back to school and to these rules that a stranger adult imposes on them.

- It took me four days to remember how to do a seating chart!!! I kept making all these careless errors and confusing students but I wasn’t able to tweak it in a short time so I just ran with it. I was so used to Google Meet populating an Excel sheet of who was here and who wasn’t. Now I’m dealing with a bunch of masked students rather than students having their cameras off. Haha.

No one said this shit was gonna be easy.

I get a bunch of comments saying “at least you won’t be grading essays anymore!”

I smile as a friendly form of agreement hoping it’s a congratulatory expression rather than one coming from envy.

But going back to the story of Buddha…everyone suffers.

Sure—English teachers suffer from the amount of essay grading they have to do. But we all suffer in our own specific way. (Poor people suffer because they’re poor / rich people suffer because they’re poor / etc.)

I’m definitely suffering from exiting the pandemic and trying to make sense of my new department and role at the high school.

This time of being nervous, anxious, and exhausted will pass and I’ll be able to work a job that will put me in a better place mentally

As I reflect about my new role, I realize how fucking stressful my job of being an English teacher was. It took years for me to humble myself and realize school isn’t about me--it’s about reaching the students and getting them to care about themselves, the community, and the world. That shit is fucking exhausting.

Five years of dealing with Trump’s rhetoric not based in facts in my ELA classroom was mentally taxing. My job as an educator revolves around creating independent critical thinkers and if what’s dominating the news, social media, and policy was that orange dude--it would have been fucking irresponsible if I ignored it. Especially in a class focused on rhetoric and logical fallacies.

I had the blessing of my administration with my approach; nevertheless, I was putting a mark on my back knowing my values are showing on my sleeves and it was prone to parent complains about their child’s commie teacher.

I somehow came out unscathed.

I attribute it to me making a point that I’m not trying to instill my values on them. I’m attempting to give them ways to explore who they are rather than blindly listening to their parents and/or tv while telling a story of how I became the person I am today.

I wrote about that in an earlier post during the pandemic where former students were asking me “how to feel” about the George Floyd protests.

My answer was always a version of “Figure that shit out yourself. I’m going through it with you.”

That extends to my teaching. I feel like I have a good understanding of my life and the story I’m creating for myself and it took years after college. I hope they’re asking themselves existential questions knowing they’ve watched plenty of people that lived the American Dream get shattered during the pandemic.

As shitty as it may sound, I feel pretty comfortable keeping up with current events but not necessarily having to tread on thin ice when bringing into the classroom.

I can definitely incorporate it; however, it’s a much different focus than the head on approach I was doing in English when I compared nonfiction to the fiction we’re reading.

There isn’t any fiction in what we’re doing right now. I’m more concerned about them getting to the point where they can engage with art criticism as well as create their own art.

This is a comforting feeling knowing that stressful part of my life of trying to make sense of the world in my classroom may be over.

I don’t necessarily need to bask in my anxiety. Haha

It’s very surreal how I got here. But, I like to remind myself that I earned it based on my work ethic, pedagogy, and my unwillingness to compromise who i am.

Some things that are stressing me out is facing one of my favorite mantras head on.

“Don’t assume people share the same values as you.”

Some of these students don’t give a shit about art and may never give a shit about art. And that’s OK.

My first day spiel revolved around the fact that I’ve been relentlessly chasing my artistic side ever since earning my undergrad.

Art has always made me happy. It was so silly of me to give it up.

I can’t assume that students will find happiness in art. That realization somewhat took some of the excitement of my new position away--but at least it’s grounded in reality.

Now I just have to refocus my personal pursuits alongside the “professional” part of my life of being an educator.

---

I had my first lecture concerning the principles of design. It was such a good feeling knowing that this is pretty much the foundation for the rest of the year. In fact…it’s the foundation for the rest of my career if I remain a photography teacher.

I’m really excited for what’s to come. I inherited this program during the perfect time where people have faced changes and challenges head on so they’re receptive to my approach—whatever that approach ends up being.

There are definitely personal goals I’ve applied to myself during this transition that all revolve around the idea of “taking better care of myself.”

Aside from my main career, I want to continue to foster the other creative parts in my life.

I want to do a much needed website revamp that gives a nice preview of who I am with links to my mixtapes, photography, art, and writing.

My primary audience is me; however, I do want to model it as my Q4 project to my students which centers around taking control of your online identity and using as a tool to network and be proactive with chasing their goals.

I also want to start living a more analog life.

Doom scrolling seems engrained in me at this point—I have to remember how much happier I am when I’m productive and step away from the screen.

Memes, news, and even small talk with instagram friends will always be nice; however, it isn’t everything.

I disabled story replies when I felt my stress and anxiety increasing during my first week at school. It was so liberating not to deal with distracting small talk.

I still like the idea of adding to my story simply because I enjoy how Instagram archives these moments rather than me flooding my very curated (red) theme. 💅

Engaging with my online audience is fun, too--but only when I’m in a good place to balance it in my personal life.

Memes—or any account for that matter—that vie for your attention is frustrating in a meta sense because I don’t want to be part of the giving end of stroking someone’s ego through likes and attention.

It will always be vacuous. Some accounts get it, though. Whitepeoplehumor’s kevin knows the opportunity he was given and is making the best of it without compromising and “selling out” in his own way.

That’s what I want.

I want to sell out in my own way and not have a single person’s opinion about me matter.

Maybe one day.

I’m definitely an extrovert that feeds off other people’s energy. That’s what made me fall in love with DJ’ing and realizing that this is a skill a lot of DJs lack. A lot of DJs are terrible because they’re not humble and think they have the best taste of music while disregarding the crowd.

But I think I’ve changed during the quarantine. I don’t necessarily want to please strangers and vibe off their energy. I’m not sure I care that much. Haha.

I’ve been reflecting on my life before the pandemic. I was making $$$ while being able to balance my teaching and DJ life. However, I’m not sure if that necessarily made me happier. It allowed me to eat Sugarfish daily and other empty activities like that. But, during the quarantine, I learned I reallllly liked the opportunity to do nothing on the weekend as a sort spiritual reset.

Weekend obligations definitely serve as a distraction from the stress I face during the week. I rationalized this as a healthy distraction because it gets me PAID

But…not quite sure if it makes me happy especially since I’m sooo tired of ‘90s hip hop or even being forced to play EDM when I never fucking want to do that.

I wish I could get paid for my twitch sets. Too bad the (bored) audience with nothing to do and no where to go is back to real life.

I thank the people that enjoyed my twitch sets every chance I get. It really helped ground me during the pandemic.

In fact, Quarantine Fridays were definitely one of the happiest parts in my life where I was able to connect with friends, new and old, during those trying-ass-times.

It’s surreal to look back at how I spent 1.5 years in this one bedroom apartment with a shitload of plants.

I’ll do a reflection post on what that meant to me later. <3

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havekiddoswilltravel · 4 years

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Social Distancing Survival Tips from a Homeschooling Mom

Homeschool resources for families affected by the COVID-19 school closings.

Scroll down to the bottom of this post for a list of resources by subject.

Do not be afraid. Do not fear. This too shall pass.

I know that the thought of a minimum of 14 days of social isolation and no outside activities with your kids can be anxiety provoking. However this is an opportunity as parents and role models to be an example to our youth on how to be still. Children are always watching, and they take cues from our reactions and behavior. If we’re in a panic and constantly talking about Covid-19 with other adults with a doomsday mentally, you may be contributing to unnecessary anxiety and fear in your children. Please have a filter and think about how what you say impacts your children. They are watching you and your behavior will have a lasting impact on your child(ren)’s mental health. An attitude of hope and love will be as contagious as one of fear and hopelessness. Which one do you want to permeate your home? Don’t try to do school at home! What I mean by that is that your child’s entire routine has been disrupted by something unknown (Covid-19) and scary. If you try to simply replicate their school environment at home, it may completely backfire on you. Allow your child to learn organically for the next few weeks in the safety of his or her home environment. Read to them, read with them and have them read to you. You will be just fine.

Unfortunately, this is not a vacation from school. This is not the time to schedule play dates, have sleepovers or even hit the local museums. It’s time to get creative and figure out ways to be content in stillness.

Routine and schedule are critical:

Additional resource regarding the importance of a schedule: https://nesca-newton.com/making-the-most-of-covid-19-school-closures/

Homeschooling and social isolation does not mean a free for all. Kids do best with a schedule or routine. Do yourself a favor and immediately set up a routine or flow to your home. Unless you want to have to be at the grocery store daily (defeating the purpose of social distancing), make sure that you set up a general eating schedule. We use this one in our home.

- Breakfast

- Morning snack

- Lunch

- Afternoon snack

- Dinner

- Bedtime Snack (always a fruit or veggie)

Other than this schedule, the kitchen is closed unless we are cooking as part of our learning. Anxiety and stress create a tendency to overeat and constantly snack.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Ruth - Have Kiddos Will Travel (@havekiddoswilltravel) on Sep 5, 2019 at 2:22pm PDT

instagram

Take a virtual tour of our National Parks.

Read aloud as a family:

Social distancing is a perfect opportunity to snuggle together and read as a family. Just grab your favorite book, your kids and a blanket. You can also have older children read to your children. This is a great way for them to bond and also for you to assess their reading and comprehension.

20 Foreign Films to Watch with Kids

Interview an elder for your family’s oral history:

Have a dance party:

Yes, I said that. Music is good for the soul. Have your kids put together their favorite play list. Decorate your living room, take out the disco ball (if you have one) and dance until your sweaty. Don’t worry about looking or feeling silly. Put down your cell phone and join the kids on the dance floor. Trust me, you’ll feel so much better.

Write letters or make cards for those home bound and elderly:

The elderly and those with preexisting conditions are the most at risk during the outbreak. Take out your craft supplies and have the kids make cards to mail to elderly family members and friends. Though you many want to make some for nursing home facilities, they will NOT distribute them at this time as the virus can live on surfaces for three days.

15 Broadway Plays and Musicals You Can Watch On Stage From Home

New York’s Metropolitan Opera announced that it would be taking some of its offerings virtual, kicking things off this week with daily free streamings of its Live in HD series.

Non screen activities:

Giant list of ideas of things to do with kids at home:

Look for themes and opportunities to celebrate unique days:

March 13

- National Earmuff Day

March 14

- National Learn About Butterflies Days

- National Pi Day

- National Potato Chip Day

- National Write Down Your Story Day

March 15

- National Everything You Think is Wrong Day

March 16

- National Panda Day

March 17

- National Corned Beef and Cabbage Day

- St. Patrick’s Day

March 18

- National Sloppy Joe Day

March 19

- National Chocolate Caramel Day

- National Let’s Laugh Day

- Spring begins

March 20

- National Ravioli Day

March 21

- National French Bread Day

- National Corn Dog Day

- National Quilting Day

March 22

- National Goof Off Day

This is just a sample of the many National Days that you could have the kids celebrate at home. Check out www.nationaldaycalendar.com for a full listing.

Free Digital Classes for Homeschooling

Study poetry:

Poetry Foundation

Engage in virtual fieldtrips:

Stuck at home? Visit a virtual museum!

Smithsonian has virtual educational resources for students and teachers to use at school and at home?

Explore African American History and Culture or create your own lesson using @SmithsonianLab today.

https://learninglab.si.edu/org/nmaahc

This is a great article by Travel and Leisure with a load of museums offering virtual field trips.

Additional Resources:

Art

The Art Sherpa

27 Art Lessons to try at home

Science:

Ask Alexa – please play Wow in the World

Wow in the World

Education.com

Music Composition:

Noteflight

BrainPop and Brainpop Jr. Currently free during Coronavirus social distancing.

Geography:

Stack the States

Stack the Countries

National Geographic Kids

Civics

Icivics

Cooking:

Coding:

Scratch

Code.org

Foreign languages:

Duolingo

History:

History for Kids

Math:

Mangahigh

PE:

Teachers and friends dealing with school closures: We are giving parents FREE unlimited access to our Fluency & Fitness® website to use with their child at home during these next few weeks. Now they can keep their child learning and help burn off that extra energy, so parents can keep their sanity. 😉 There are over 900 videos to review 60+ literacy and math topics for K-2nd. Feel free to share this link with your classroom families, friends, and anyone who may find this helpful.

https://fluencyandfitness.com/register/school-closures/

Reading:

Learning A-Z free through June 2020.

Raz-Kids is a digital resource that provides a library of differentiated books students can use to practice reading wherever they are (Internet connection required).

Headsprout is an online K–5 reading program that adapts to the needs of the individual student. It is self-paced, which makes it ideal for at-home practice.

Life skills:

Social distancing provides a perfect opportunity to teach your children some basic life skills. Check out this article with some great ideas.

TED-ED

This document contains a list of TED-ED videos by topic.

Choose joy. Choose love. Choose hope.

Social distancing is manageable. Let’s work together to provide each other with resources and ideas to make us all be the best parents possible. This list will continue to grow, so check back often. Let’s encourage and support one another during these trying times.

Peace and love!

#havekiddoswilltravel #homeschool #explore #teachingkids #socialdistancing #schoolclosings #teded #teachingresources #homeschoolresources #covid19

0 notes

tjphoa-blog · 5 years

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Breaking down stereotypes

If I asked you to close your eyes and picture a truck driver, what gender of person comes to your mind? Male right? Why is that? Why is that we are conditioned in a way that whenever we say the occupation truck driver we think of such a specific gender and not all genders? I am no phycologist and I have not research and studied this for years, I am just a university student who is sitting at his room writing this article. However, I can say what I feel the reason is. The answer comes in two parts, stereotypes and experience. These two are closely linked together, because without one you can’t have the other, for example, stereotypes are formed from what society’s experience is and vice versa.

There has been a lot of talk lately about women and the stereotypes that face them every day. I can’t say that they don’t have them because it is clear that they do. However, have you ever considered that males have stereotypes as well? That’s less talked about. For example, men when we are young we are constantly told that boys don’t cry, crying is for girls, boys have to be strong and brave and don’t show weakness. What is the problem with showing weakness? Is any form of sadness seen as weakness? Of course not.

I personally face male stereotypes almost every day of my life. Why? Because, I am a male who is studying primary education. This is a stereotype because men aren’t considered to be sensitive and good with children, as it is as seen as being ‘soft’. Now this to a lot of men is the greatest insult that you could ever say to them, ‘how dare you question my masculinity’. However, for me that is the greatest compliment that you could ever give to me because that’s part of what I want to do for a job.

My start on this crazy journey started when I was 16. Everyone in my year had taken a test where there was a variety of different multiple choice questions that were based around what you wanted to do for a job and what you liked as hobbies. From the answers that you gave they were able to give you a list of jobs that you would be good at. One of mine was a primary teacher, and when my teacher read out my results a light bulb set off inside my head when she said that. I didn’t know why it went off at the time, but I became interested in exploring it.

I got my first work experience after I finished year 11 in a reception class and a kindergarten class. I remember the first moment I walked into the kindergarten classroom I was standing awkwardly at the door looking for children to interact with. At the corner of my eye I saw these two sisters playing together in the corner of the room. They were playing with a puzzle. I decided to go and interact with them. I sat down with them. They looked at me like I was from space, which was understandable because here was this man who just suddenly appeared like the Gene from Aladdin and now he wants to interact with them. I remember I put one of the pieces in the puzzle and said ‘oh look what has happened’ expecting some sort of response … nothing. They continued to stare. I made another attempt to get them to respond. Nothing. For ten minutes I was sat with them they just stared at me blankly. I thought to myself ‘Oh crap what in the hell have I got myself into?’ Thankfully, another child saw my awkward attempts at interaction and pulled me over to look at what he had built.

After my week of work experience I was pretty confident that I enjoyed what I was doing, and I had some hints that I was popular with the children. For example, at the end of the week one of the children asked me if I would like to go on holiday with him. Although I did want to go on holiday, I decided at the time that it would be a bit out of my duties. However, I was not prepared for what was happening without me knowing.

When I had finished the week my mother brought in a cake to say thank you for having me. As she was walking out to the car she heard one of the teachers come up to her with tears in her eyes. My mother trusted this teacher to tell her truth about how I had done at the placement. The teacher explained that she had just had a meeting with a parent who is at the school and they got onto talking about me because I share a condition with the parent’s children. As soon at the parent recognised that it was me who they were talking about she suddenly said “Oh thank god, my daughters are in his class and they won’t shut up about him” … it was those two little girls who had done nothing but stare at me.

To this day, I do not know the name of that mother who said that, but wherever you are, thank you. I wouldn’t be sitting here at university studying what I love if it were not for you, because at the time I wasn’t sure if I was any good or anything, and that story helped me realise that I was making an impact to somebody’s life and that is the greatest compliment that a person could every receive.

Over the course of my studies in childcare I have been lucky to have many experiences that have shown me the impact that I was having on children.

One example is a child I met while I was doing my level 3 in BETC in Children’s Learning, Play and Development. I was told by somebody else that worked in the nursery that this child had trouble with forming relationships with men and that the child had a fear of men, and to not be surprised if she came into the room and started crying when she saw me.

When the child did finally walk into the room to show the nursery practitioner a sticker that she had received from going to the potty she looked at me and she instantly took a step back. To all her credit she didn’t cry or scream she just became shy and didn’t go near me.

Whenever this happens I feel that it is best to let the child come to you instead of you going to the child, because it allows them to be in control of their own relationships. So, I went to interact with some of her friends in the class. By the end of the day this trick had worked and the child came up to me and sat next to me and said ‘You’re funny’. This not only marked the first words that she had ever said to me, but also the first time somebody had not sarcastically called me funny and actually meant it.

When the child’s mother walked into pick up the child the nursery practitioner introduced me to the mother and told her that her daughter had liked being in my company. Of which the mother responded with ‘oh that’s good she doesn’t usually interact with men’. Another one of the most heartwarming moments that have shown me the the importance of the role I have.

Whenever a child walks into my classroom that I am in and I’m told that they don’t have a male figure in their lives, a feeling that I have a barrier to break down to get to the child, and that I have to hold this male figure in their lives draws over me. I know that it is not my responsibility to hold a male figure in their lives because I am their teacher, however, that is the nature of who I am.

On the other hand, the satisfaction that I get when a child sees me as a role model for them is like no other feeling in the world, because that is just confirmation that I have done my job.

So, the message of this article is to do what you love. No matter how many stereotypes you have to break down and how many people’s toes you have to stand on to get to where you need to be. I can almost guarantee you that there is somebody out there who doesn’t like the fact that I am breaking down male stereotypes, “stereotypes are there for a reason, so that we know our place” in the words of a woman on the bus the other day. You are not always going to be liked for what you do, but in the words of Sir Ken Robinson “It is not what you do, it is who you are” (Robinson,2006). Break down enough stereotypes and one day you may find that somebody has benefited from what you did.

Take Rosa Parks. Did you think she thought she would spark the world in a notion of inclusion for forever when she sat on that bus and refused to move for the white lady? No, of course not. She wasn’t thinking about the impact that she would have on the world, she was doing what she thought was right.

Stay strong. Be yourself. Be brave. And, be kind, to others, but most importantly to yourself.

#article #bekindtoyourself #beyourself #forgetstereotypes #bebrave

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wickedgxmes · 3 years

Photo

YASMIN YILDIRIM TASK 01: Character Development

The flower that blooms in adversity is the most rare and beautiful of all.

THE BASICS

Full Name: Yasmin Melek Yildirim

Nicknames: Yas, Mina

Face Claim: Esra Bilgiç

Age: 30

Birthday: September 18th

Gender: Cisgender Female

Pronouns: She/Her

Romantic Orientation: Panromantic

Sexual Orientation: Demisexual

PHYSICALITY

Details About Appearance That Differ From FC: (i.e. hair color, hair length/cut, height etc.) N/A

Perfect Vision or Glasses?: Perfect Vision

Scars/Birthmarks?: {TW Self Harm} Yas’ body is littered in scars. Faint tally marks from the each life she had taken back when she used to work as a mercenary lines her back, while deeper cuts she has inflicted more recently upon herself lay scattered haphazardly across her hips and any place she can hide them.

Tattoos?: Yasmin has one very fair tattoo of two stars laid across her collarbone. A reminder of all of those nights ago when she would find herself sprawled out upon some abandoned rooftop dreaming of what could have been.

Piercings?: Yas has two piercings in each of her lobes

Posture: Yasmin has excellent posture, very rarely being caught with her shoulder slumped or her head not being held high

Dominant Hand?: Ambidextrous

Activity Level?: Very Active. Although Yasmin may be a duchess, she spends a great deal of her free time still training with the Tower Spies to ensure she never loses the edge that she once had back when she was a spy

Physical Strength: Average

Speed: Above Average

Agility: Above Average

Accuracy: Above Average

Stamina: Average. Although Yasmin used to have above average stamina, it has slowly decreased over the years given how much of her time is now devoted to life at court rather than life as a spy.

Can They Swim?: Not all too well. Although she may be able to keep herself somewhat a float, growing up in the desert, means that she is hardly a strong swimmer.

Clothing Style: Yasmin’s personal style is far more comfortable and simplistic than one would assume from the duchess of artists. If she were to choose her own attire for herself, it would most likely consist of billowing pants and a cloak. But, as the acting duchess, Yasmin’s attire has much more colorful and regal, modeling a different outfit per occasion as she shows off the designs of her own people.

Accessories: A poison ring and a dainty pendent around her neck of the sun. It almost seems cheap around in neck in comparison to the elegant gowns and garments she wears on the daily, but the necklace was a gift she had received during her life on the streets. One of the only belongings she still has from that time in her life.

Any Allergies?: N/A

How Well Do They Sleep?: Yasmin has a hard time falling asleep at night. Being far too paranoid for her own likely, she often spends the nights dreading the worst and having grown up on the streets, it is hard for her to feel at peace in the lavishly decorated bedroom of the duchess. Often feeling as though she is more of a stranger in her own chambers than belonging to it or to it her.

Any Additional Details?: (Do they have a favorite physical feature about themselves? Are they part of the disabled community? Do they have any health issues? etc.) Yasmin’s left side is ever so slightly quicker than her right do to an injury she acquired on a job back when she was working as a mercenary that she never fully recovered from

MANNERISMS

Accent?: Yasmin has a refined manor of speaking. She has worked to remove any inflections from her voice if she can help it, but occasionally her prim facade will falter as her past comes seeping back into her voice.

Languages: English, Turkish, Arabic, Latin, Spanish etc. (She knows a fair deal of many languages. Some better than others.)

Do They Curse?: On occasion. But, rarely, if ever, in public.

Favorite Word?: Found

Least Favorite Phrase?: “I love you”

Good Habits: Yasmin carries a smile that has a way of putting those around her at ease; She has a way about her of making anyone she is speaking to feel important whether it be a foreign duke or members of her staff or people she bumps into on the street; she is incredible detail oriented and will go out of her way to ensure the wellbeing of her people whether they are strangers to her or not

Bad Habits: Has a bad tendency of chewing or biting down on her lip when in deep in thought (something she is trying to work on); {TW Self Harm} digs her nails deep into her skin (the palms of her hands), pinches herself or mindlessly scratches away at herself often until it leaves a mark or she draws blood

Any Specific Ticks?: fidgets with the hem of her sleeves or twiddles anything in hand (knife, pen etc.)

FAMILY & UPBRINGING

Which Dukedom Do They Reside In?: Kum Diyari (Sandspell)

Birthplace?: Kum Diyari (Sandspell)

Social Class: Yasmin was born into poverty, but overtime she was able to climb her way up to becoming part of the upper 1% as she takes her place amongst the nobility.

Biological Parents/Parental Figures: Leyla and Altan Yildirim

Additional Family Members: (Siblings, Cousins, Aunts & Uncles etc.) TBD (I’m still deciding :O)

Pets?: TBD (Also still deciding 0:) )

CONNECTIONS

Notable Past Relationships?: The thieves she grew up around; the spy who took her in/trained her to be who she is now

Person You Can’t Seem To Forget?: Kaan (her first love/the man who robbed her and left her for dead)

Person You Can’t Seem To Forgive?: Her father for never once allowing her feel safe as a child

Any Additional Connections Your Character May Be Looking For?: (Feel free to link a connections page if you would like to make one) {I’ll put together a connections page at a later date but all of the things ;D }

STATUS & OCCUPATION

Current Occupation: Duchess of Kum Diyari (Sandspell)

Dream Position: A traveling performer or maybe that of a painter. As much as Yasmin grew to resent her father for embracing the nature of a starving artist to the point where he life was put in danger, there was once a time when Yasmin wanted nothing more than to paint and travel the world. She’d fall to sleep dreaming about the day where she may be able to run off and see the world.

Past Jobs?: Yasmin, growing up, was a thief, before becoming a Spy/Mercenary for Kum Diyari & the Crown

Spending Habits: Frugal. Yasmin is very strategic when it comes to budgeting, preferring to spend her own delegated allowance on that of her people or on a smart political move rather than expenses for herself. Her lavish dresses are typical borrowed from that of local artists of Sandspell so that she can help promote their work. Yas is not apposed to spending, but she often fews each purchase as that of a calculated investment. She also keeps very few personal belongings, having a hard time feeling that anything, right down to her position truly belongs to her.

In Debt?: No.

PSYCHOLOGY

Intellect: Above Average

MBTI Type: INFJ

Enneagram type: 1. The Reformer

Moral Alignment: Chaotic Good

Temperament: Calm and mild tempered

Element: Earth

Introvert or Extrovert?: Introvert

Emotional Stability?: - Presents themselves as calm, composed and collected whilst dealing with anxieties and negative thoughts

ASTROLOGY

Zodiac Sign: Virgo

Birth Stone: Sapphire

TRAITS & PERSPECTIVES

Drives/Motivations: To ensure Kum Diyari remains a prosperous place of knowledge and artistry. To live up to the perfect image of ‘duchess’ and the ‘beacon of hope’ her people look to her are

Hopes: For the wellbeing, wealth and prosperity of Kum Diyari; To allow the youth of Sandspell the ability to chose their own paths rather than feel forced in one direction to due to necessity

Fears: Of inadequacy as a leader

Dreams: To one day feel as though her choices are solely that of her own; to act upon her deepest desires

Sense of Humor?: Witty one liners, soft spoken/cooed whispers, & alluring smiles as if to say the joke she just made is a secret between two

Biggest Achievement: Earning the faith and trust of that of her people/being viewed as the heart of Sandspell

Biggest Regrets: Sacrificing the parts of herself she once held in the highest esteem to be the leader she feels is expected of her to be & giving her heart to someone who didn’t deserve her love let alone her trust

Most At Ease When?: Painting, Getting lost in the treasure trove of knowledge kept in the tower, listening to those around her speak of their greatest passions (especially those of her people), sneaking off to the edge of her Dukedom’s coast to watch the sun rise or set upon the horizon

Least At Ease When?: In crowded gatherings in which all of the attention is directed to her; in settings where she is expected to ‘perform’ the role she plays far too well

Talents: Strategizing, painting, debating, holding intellectual conversations, dancing, playing multiple instruments, speaking multiple languages, one on one combat etc.

Shortcomings: Situations that require a great deal of vulnerability; Has a tendency to withdrawn herself emotionally in favor of thinking strategically

Have They Ever Committed A Crime?: (If so, did they ever get caught?) Yes. She has committed quite a few crimes although she prefers to brush over her past. She was caught once by what would later become her mentor at the tower. A spy for Sandspell who saw potential in her and took her under their wing rather than turning her in.

Are They A Team Player?: She is for the most part. Although, she does have a tendency to keep her cards far too close to her own chest.

Can They Play an Instrument?: Yasmin is skilled in quite a few instruments ranging from the violin to the flute to the piano etc.

Braid Hair?: Yes

Tie a Tie?: Yes

Pick a Lock?: Yes

Cook?: Yes

Drink?: Yes

Use Drugs?: Yes

Are They Prone to Violence?: No. She will fight if provoked, but Yasmin tries to avoid conflict when possible.

Prone to Crying?: Not in public. Behind closed doors however is another story.

Believe in Love at First Sight?: No. Yasmin used to once upon a time, but nowadays, she’s not even sure if she believes in love anymore.

FAVORITES

Color: Red

Animal/Mythical Beast: Unicorn

Food: Baklava

Beverage: White Wine

Flower: Desert Rose

Scent: Eucalyptus and Mint

Mode of Transportation: Horseback (Technological wise though either Enchanted Carriages or Bullet Trains)

Season: Spring

EXTRA

Link to her Pinterest: https://pin.it/kQVHuMR

#ashrptask #ashrptask1 #ashrptask: yasmin #c: yasmin #yasmin bio

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judeblenews-blog · 6 years

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How white supremacists are thriving on YouTube

What role do major institutions play in the promotion of extremism? Two days into this week, we’ve already gotten two important looks at the issue. On Monday I told you about a report from danah boyd about the media’s role in amplifying “digital martyrs” like Alex Jones. (I pasted the wrong link into the newsletter yesterday — come on, Newton! — and so if you haven’t read it yet, there you go.) Today comes a report from Rebecca Lewis looking at another kind of amplification: the closely linked network of conservative YouTube personalities who collaborate in videos and advance an extremist ideology. (Both reports, incidentally, come from the New York-based nonprofit Data and Society.) Lewis set out to understand how YouTube in particular has become a thriving hub of far-right content. Starting with a handful of well-known conservative personalities, she began tracking their appearances on one another’s channels. When another personality popped up on one of these channels, she began charting that person’s path through YouTube as well. Eventually, she had watched hundreds of hours of video from 65 influencers across more than 80 channels. After mapping the network, Lewis makes three findings. These influencers built an alternative media network by emphasizing their relatability, “authenticity,” and accessibility to their fans. They portray themselves as social underdogs, outcasts, and victims, giving them a countercultural ethos that can be attractive to younger viewers. The influencers have effectively promoted themselves using tactics including “ideological testimonials,” in which they recount their conversion from wayward leftists into right-thinking conservatives; search engine optimization, in which they use keywords common in more neutral and liberal-oriented videos to attract viewers; and “strategic controversy,” which is to say stunts. The influencers encourage people to adopt a more radical set of views over time by first encouraging them to reject all non-ideological media, and then introducing them to extremist figures who offer alternative worldviews. Lewis notes that she is not the first scholar to examine radicalization on YouTube; she cites Zeynep Tufekci’s New York Times piece and ex-YouTube employee Guillaume Chaslot’s work on the subject. Where she differs from her predecessors is in moving away from the now-standard critique that YouTube’s core problem is technological in nature. Previous work has focused on how quickly recommendation algorithms push viewers to extremist content; Lewis says the problem lies in the content itself. She writes: While these articles identify a real problem, they treat radicalization as a fundamentally technical problem. What the section below showcases is that radicalization on YouTube is also a fundamentally social problem. Thus, even if YouTube altered or fully removed its content recommendation algorithms, the AIN would still provide a pathway for radicalization. Lewis’s proposed solution is that YouTube should develop a strict value-based code of behavior, actively monitor the content of influencers’ videos, and discipline violators accordingly: There is an undercurrent to this report that is worth making explicit: in many ways, YouTube is built to incentivize the behavior of these political influencers. YouTube monetizes influence for everyone, regardless of how harmful their belief systems are.The platform, and its parent company, have allowed racist, misogynist, and harassing content to remain online – and in many cases, to generate advertising revenue – as long as it does not explicitly include slurs. YouTube also profits directly from features like Super Chat which often incentivizes “shocking” content. In other words, the type of content and engagement created by the AIN fits neatly into YouTube’s business model. The website similarly seeks policies that offer it protection for hosting user-generated content while simultaneously facing minimal liability for what those users say. This report has shown how these attempts at objectivity are being exploited by users who fundamentally reject objectivity as a valid stance. As a result, platforms like YouTube have an imperative to govern content and behavior for explicit values, such as the rejection of content that promotes white supremacy, regardless of whether it includes slurs. It seems fair to assume that YouTube would reject this notion out of hand. (The criticism would start with “it doesn’t scale” and go from there.) But there are certainly smaller steps YouTube could take in the meantime. Lewis notes the glee with which one conservative provocateur received his plaque for attracting 1 million subscribers; surely, she writs, the company could choose to withhold trophies from people arguing against equality or targeting harassment at others. In the meantime, I hope YouTube employees will at least read this report, if only to understand how some of its most influential users are exploiting its viral mechanics to promote white supremacy and other noxious views.

Democracy

Polarization in Poland: A Warning From Europe If, like me, you spend a lot of time looking around America and wonder what is going on, exactly, you’ll want to read Anne Applebaum’s long, discursive essay on how “the illiberal state” has made similar inroads in Poland, where she lives, and in Hungary. The essay’s overall effect is to remind you that people everywhere are basically the same, and in ways that threaten democracy. She concludes: In truth, the argument about who gets to rule is never over, particularly in an era when people have rejected aristocracy, and no longer believe that leadership is inherited at birth or that the ruling class is endorsed by God. Some of us, in Europe and North America, have settled on the idea that various forms of democratic and economic competition are the fairest alternative to inherited or ordained power. But we should not have been surprised—I should not have been surprised—when the principles of meritocracy and competition were challenged. Democracy and free markets can produce unsatisfying outcomes, after all, especially when badly regulated, or when nobody trusts the regulators, or when people are entering the contest from very different starting points. Sooner or later, the losers of the competition were always going to challenge the value of the competition itself. Bertelsmann to Merge Unit That Moderates for Facebook With a Competitor With moderation very much in the news, Bertelsmann has agreed to merge the part of its business that offers content moderation services for Facebook and other companies with a competitor, Sara Germano reports: Bertelsmann’s Arvato customer relations management division runs moderation centers in Germany and elsewhere, where workers pore over content on Facebook that has been flagged as objectionable. The task has taken on a higher profile as governments increasingly demand moderation of online content. But the unit hasn’t been growing as quickly as Bertelsmann had hoped, and the company said in January it was considering options for the business. On Tuesday, it announced a merger between the unit and the customer relations business of Morocco-based Saham Group to form a new company in which both firms will retain a 50% stake. Instagram will use ads to help users register to vote Now here’s way that social networks can benefit democracy. As Chaim Gartenberg reports, Instagram will put ads in users’ feeds and in Stories with links to help users register to vote. To provide accurate voting information, Instagram is partnering with TurboVote, which promises “up-to-date information on how to register, how to update their registration, how to look up their state’s voting rules and more.” Additionally, Instagram is planning to offer “I Voted” story stickers on Election Day. In addition to letting you brag to all your friends about how good you are at doing your civic duty, it will also link to Get to the Polls to help others find their polling location. Mark Zuckerberg on Why We Should Support the Dreamers Wired turned 25 — happy birthday, Wired! — and talked to tech-world luminaries about whatever said luminaries would agree to make time for. Mark Zuckerberg chose to talk about immigration. Honestly the photo caption is more interesting than the immigration stuff, which we have heard from Zuckerberg before: “During the photo shoot, Mark’s dog, Beast, stayed by photographer Michelle Groskopf’s side the entire time … until she asked Mark to sit in a chair in his sunroom. At that point, Beast leapt across the room onto Mark’s lap. He responded with an ‘oof!’ and we all laughed.”

Elsewhere

ACLU says Facebook allowed discriminatory job ads that didn’t appear to women - The Verge Here’s a big new lawsuit against Facebook from the ACLU and the Communication Workers of America alleging that Facebook’s ad platform enables gender-based discrimination. My colleague Jake Kastrenakes: The American Civil Liberties Union is filing charges against Facebook for allegedly running discriminatory job ads that appeared only to men, something that is illegal under the Civil Rights Act. The ACLU says that Facebook’s platform allowed 10 employers, including a software developer and a police department, to run ads that excluded women and non-binary users, and it says the social network should be held liable for creating the tools to offer these allegedly discriminatory ads. The complaint is being filed with the United States Equal Employment Opportunity Commission, a federal agency that oversees charges of workplace discrimination. It’s filed on behalf of three women who say they were discriminated against, but the complaint also hopes to cover “millions” of women who were excluded from seeing job ads by Facebook and various employers. Facebook and Financial Firms Tussled for Years Over Access to User Data My read of this Journal story is basically that Facebook wanted access to financial data for use in building chatbots, which no one wound up using. I don’t think there’s much more to it than that. Facebook Seeks Engineers for Custom AR Chips ($) Aaron Tilley and Sarah Kuranda report that Facebook wants to build its own augmented-reality chips, likely to kickstart its inevitable (and probably already in development?) AR headset: It isn’t clear whether Facebook will eventually release its own AR headset using the custom chips it is developing. If such a product emerges, it could be years away from being released since Facebook Reality Labs—previously known as Oculus Research—is typically focused on long-term projects. Facebook is also investing in chip development for artificial intelligence and data center purposes, as Bloomberg has reported. Instagram could still develop a new shopping app — but here’s how it’s trying to woo window-shoppers in its current one On stage at Code Commerce, Kurt Wagner asked Instagram business lead Vishal Shah if he was building a shopping app, as I reported earlier this month. He didn’t say no! (The answer is yes.) Why PayPal’s crackdown on ASMR creators should worry you Some people make videos where they whisper, crinkle up paper, and make other tiny, stimulating noises for enthusiastic audiences. Amid some sort of sex panic, PayPal is banning these creators for life, Violet Blue reports: This past week, nonsexual ASMR video creators Sharon DuBois (ASMR Glow), Scottish Murmurs, Creative Cal, and Rose ASMR have been permanently banned from PayPal and had their funds frozen for 180 days. Like with YouTube’s July censorship sweep, the women create videos of sound effects and have been expelled from the payment utility under alleged violations of the company’s sexual content policy prohibitions. ASMR community websites are now warning all creators to avoid PayPal. Engadget reached out to PayPal regarding the banning of ASMR video creators, the 8chan sex-harassment campaign and how PayPal plans to protect users from this type of abuse — but we did not hear back before publication time. A Viral Tweet Stole Fetish Model’s Photos, Told Fake Domestic Abuse Story to Sell Skinny Tea Here’s a good reminder that the bulk of misinformation is still financially motivated. (Also, like, wow to all of this.) Ashley’s thread went viral over the weekend, with more than 330,000 likes and 77,000 retweets. But none of these images are actually of her. They belong to a cam model who actually specializes in feederism, according to the model’s blog, which Motherboard reviewed. The “Ashley” account was suspended less than two hours after I contacted Twitter to ask whether this account violates the platform’s rules impersonation rules. Palmer Luckey Is Just Getting Started Oculus co-founder Palmer Luckey tells Wired that he once tried to build, um, this: A bypass for my peripheral nervous system. Rather than waiting a few hundred milliseconds for a signal to travel from my brain to my extremities, I tried to capture it closer to the source and relay it electronically. If you could do this with all of your limbs, not just one finger or one arm, you could potentially have superhuman reflexes without doing a bunch of crazy work on, let’s say, exoskeletons or predictive analytics. Jack Dorsey on ProPublica’s Experimental Journalism Jack Dorsey tells Lauren Goode how much he likes ProPublica, and it is very charming. (ProPublica is fantastic.)

Launches

Twitter will soon let you switch between chronological and ranked feeds Here’s a surprise from late Monday: Twitter is working on a way to let you switch back easily from a ranked to an unranked feed. Both have their uses — ranked is great for catching up; unranked is great for living in the moment — and so I’m delighted to see Twitter accommodating both as first-class citizens in the app. If You See Disinformation Ahead of the Midterms, We Want to Hear From You If you see misinformation online and decide you would like to report it to The New York Times instead of me, here’s how. (Please at least CC me, though.) HQ Trivia looks to expand with HQ Words, a new Wheel of Fortune-style game HQ has a new game coming in October. Also: it has a new CEO! Also, it has generated more than $10 million advertising revenue, which I found pretty impressive! Maybe there’s some life in the old viral phenomenon yet. YouTube is offering its membership benefits to smaller creators Creators with more than 50,000 subscribers will be able to sell viewers a $4.99 monthly membership fee in exchange for exclusive perks, Megan Farrokhmanesh reports. Previously, the feature required at least 100,000 subs. Pinterest launches API that lets brands find and track influencers Finally, an API to let you hunt down influencers and — we can only hope — subdue them. iPhone XS review: the XS and XS Max are solid updates to a winning formula Did you know that social platforms are most often used on phones? Well, there are a couple of new ones!

Takes

Infowarzel Charlie Warzel reflects on the danah boyd report and encourages reporters to employ “defensive journalism” when writing about extremists: What I take from her is not that we journalists completely lost the plot (though we could do without being so sensitive!), but that there’s room for so much more sophistication in our work and what happens after we hit publish. This notion reminds me a bit of defensive driving. Though the term ‘defensive journalism’ sounds ridiculous, I think this a helpful way to think of reporting in the era of the platforms and the information war. Like defensive driving, defensive journalism isn’t about aggression, it’s about staying vigilant and anticipating how others might ignoring or break the rules. It’s a heightened sense of awareness and skepticism (that should be very familiar to journalists) that doesn’t just keep you safe, but everyone else on the road, too. A New Twitter Feature: Smart Accounts Hot on the heels of news about the Twitter timeline, Jason Kottke suggests that Twitter create “smart accounts” — personalized collections of tweets that you can follow or unfollow. So you could follow a smart account that includes “likes from friends,” for example, “trends,” or “popular threads.” I love this idea.

Updates

Media Manipulation, Strategic Amplification, and Responsible Journalism As noted above, in an incredible self-own, I mis-pasted the link to yesterday’s lead item! Incredibly, only one of you told me about this. Anyway, thank you Roger McNamee! And the rest of you, really do read danah boyd’s talk. Facebook Says This Post About A Firing Squad For A Philippine Senator Doesn’t Violate Its Rules In Friday’s newsletter I included an item about Facebook declining to remove a post that seemingly called for violence against a politician in the Philippines. A spokeswoman wrote me to say that it later decided to remove the post.

And finally ...

Elon Musk recruits Dogecoin creator to fight cryptocurrency scambots Say you are Elon Musk. You’re having a terrible week for lots of reasons, including a possible criminal probe of your tweets. But you also have this other Twitter problem, which is that people impersonate your Twitter account to try to scam people into buying them cryptocurrency. And so he reached out to the creator of joke-cryptocurrency Dogecoin to get some sort of script that … prevents this from happening? Somehow? Details are scarce. But as David Canellis notes: The scambots are so prevalent that Twitter was forced to add a new rule: changing your name to Elon Musk will get you banned from the platform. Ironically, just a few months ago, Musk joked about the prevalence of scambots on Twitter – and how impressed he is by the people behind them. It seems they no longer amuse him. I would venture to say there are a number of things from Elon Musk’s recent past that no longer amuse him!

Talk to me

Send me tips, questions, comments, corrections, and radicalizing videos: [email protected]. Via: Theverge Read the full article

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asecretsummer-rpgpromo · 6 years

Photo

WANTED! FC can be changed!

Name: Julie Tayor Age: 37 Sexuality: Up to Player Gender: Female Portrayed By: Rachelle Lefevre Availability: Open

“I just want this over so everything can go back to normal.”

→ Background

Phoebe and Zachary’s aunt Julie has been like a second mother to them both ever since their mum passed away after battling an illness when they were kids. She and her brother, minister of a local church, have always been pretty close. Julie isn’t religious at all despite the fact they were brought up in the same household by their Christian parents but that’s never been a problem for the two. Her brother isn’t one of those people who takes religion to the extremes, which this town does have a few of sadly, and Julie has always been able to be herself. As has her nephew and niece, who came out as lesbian years ago. Julie does sometimes wonder, however, if her nephew really accepts his sister’s sexuality but she figures she’s being silly. Zachary is very protective of Phoebe and Julie just lets her imagination run riot sometimes.

She’s worked as a police officer for the local police department since she was twenty-eight years old. Her partner, Bradley Anderson, has been her first and only since she started working at the station. She takes pride in her position and the work the force does around Baberton. Even though a lot of people nowadays have lost some faith in the police department due to a string of events involving a serial killer… and the way the department handled the murder of Annie Pierce - saying the girl had run away without much evidence to back that up, when her body was really buried in the woods for years. Julie knows that many people don’t trust the police anymore and she’s determined to change that any way she possibly can.

→ Back to Baberton

Everybody thought that the killing was over when Daisy Ramsey confessed and killed herself by jumping off the roof of a building with Annie’s old friends as witnesses. It started up again, however, months later. There have been a couple of deaths though whether they are related is yet to be seen but Julie believes they are, as does most everyone else in the station she’s spoken to. Work is hard right now, with little to no leads to follow, and she knows that the town is losing hope and patience. She and Bradley have secretly been assigned protective detail of Annie Pierce’s old friends (Imogen Ford, Ruby Peterson, and Kelly Sharpe), especially since the night of Imogen Ford’s attack in the high school during a storm. Julie and Bradley were given this task by Chief Constable Gregory Sharpe, Kelly’s father, who entrusted them with the safety of the girls and Julie is determined not to let him down. Sometimes she and Bradley work together and sometimes they separate, following one girl each while keeping tabs on the third wherever possible. It’s important the girls (and whoever may be out to get them) don’t know she and her partner are there so Julie takes this very seriously.

When she’s not working she does her best to keep up with her family, her brother and his kids. Phoebe and Zach mean a lot to her and she wants them to be safe and happy, she’ll do anything she has to, to make that a reality. She has to keep the streets of Baberton safe for them, so they don’t have to live the rest of their lives in fear of murder, and she wants to be a good influence for them, a role model in the absence of their mother. Her brother does his best and he’s an amazing father but sometimes you just need a woman’s touch and Julie is always there to offer help and support when needed.

→ What’s Her Secret?

She doesn’t fully trust Bianca Averina, the station’s PR liaison and thinks that she’s hiding something. She doesn’t like the jokes Bianca makes about her and Leo being the only ones who really do anything round the station. The woman just rubs Julie up the wrong way and she’s started looking into her background when she has time, sure there’s something that she’s not telling. Julie usually has very good instincts and she knows to listen to them.

She found evidence that points to Alexandra Willis, her colleague and friend, tampering with evidence. She was using Alexandra’s computer during the storm when her own was down and she noticed some files had been locked in a folder. She couldn’t open it but she received a text message from somebody calling themselves “-A” that led her to believe the files have evidence in them linking to the Leanne Wilmington murder case… and she doesn’t quite have enough evidence to go to the Chief as the folder on Alexandra’s computer was soon deleted… but she’s not one to let things go and she’s determined to get to the bottom of this.

Main | Plot | Most Wanted | Ask

#Rachelle Lefevre #rachelle lefevre fc #active rp #active rpg #active roleplay

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perfectzablog · 6 years

Text

How Parents Can Help Kids Navigate the Pressures of Their Digital Lives

As adults witness the rising tides of teenaged anxiety, it’s tough not to notice a common thread that runs through the epidemic — something that past generations never dealt with. Clutched in the hand of nearly every teen is a smartphone, buzzing and beeping and blinking with social media notifications.

Parents, all too often, just want to grab their teen’s phone and stuff it in a drawer. But is social media and the omnipresence of digital interactions really the cause of all this anxiety?

The short answer is: It’s complicated.

Recent studies have noted a significant uptick in depression and suicidal thoughts over the past several years for teens, especially those who spend multiple hours a day using screens, and especially girls. But many of the pressures teenagers feel from social media are actually consistent with developmentally normal concerns around social standing and self-expression. Social media can certainly exacerbate these anxieties, but for parents to truly help their children cope, they should avoid making a blanket condemnation. Instead, parents should tailor their approach to the individual, learning where a particular child’s stressors lie and how that child can best gain control of this alluring, powerful way to connect with peers.

A Link Between Social Media and Mental Health Concerns

Many experts have described a rise in sleeplessness, loneliness, worry, and dependence among teenagers — a rise that coincides with the release of the first iPhone 10 years ago. One study found that 48 percent of teens who spend five hours per day on an electronic device have at least one suicide risk factor, compared to 33 percent of teens who spend two hours a day on an electronic device. We’ve all heard anecdotes, too, of teens being reduced to tears from the constant communication and comparisons that social media invites.

Through likes and follows, teens are “getting actual data on how much people like them and their appearance,” says Lindsey Giller, a clinical psychologist at the Child Mind Institute who specializes in youth and young adults with mood disorders. “And you’re not having any break from that technology.” She’s seen teens with anxiety, poor self-esteem, insecurity, and sadness attributed, at least in part, to constant social media use.

Teenage Challenges and Stressors, Exacerbated

But the connection between anxiety and social media might not be simple, or purely negative. Correlation does not equal causation; it may be that depression and anxiety lead to more social media use, for example, rather than the other way around. There could also be an unknown third variable — for instance, academic pressures or economic concerns — connecting them, or teens could simply be more likely to admit to mental health concerns now than they were in previous generations.

It’s also important to remember that teens experience social media in a wide range of ways. The ability to raise awareness, connect with people across the world, and share moments of beauty can be empowering and uplifting for some. And many teens understand that the images they see are curated snapshots, not real-life indicators, and are less likely to let those posts make them feel insecure about their own lives.

Above all, says researcher Emily Weinstein, who studies teens and their social media habits, parents need to keep in mind that it’s probably not just social media that’s making their teens anxious — it’s the normal social stressors that these platforms facilitate, albeit at a different size and scale.

“So many of the behaviors we’re talking about have pre-digital corollaries,” says Weinstein, a postdoctoral fellow at the Harvard Graduate School of Education. “They’re the same sort of developmental challenges that adolescents have grappled with for decades, though now they’re taking place in different spaces that can certainly amplify them and shift their quality, quantity, and scale.“

“But the idea of wanting to fit in, the critical importance of peer relationships, and the process of figuring out which version of yourself you want to be and how you want to express that identity to others — those features of adolescence are not new.”

What’s Triggering about Social Media? Youth and technology expert Amanda Lenhart’s 2015 Pew study of teens, technology, and friendships reveals a range of social media-induced stressors:

Seeing people posting about events to which you haven’t been invited

Feeling pressure to post positive and attractive content about yourself

Feeling pressure to get comments and likes on your posts

Having someone post things about you that you cannot change or control

In analyses of thousands of adolescents’ reactions to digital stressors, Weinstein and her colleagues have found even more challenges:

Feeling replaceable: If you don’t respond to a best friend’s picture quickly or effusively enough, will she find a better friend?

Too much communication: A boyfriend or girlfriend wants you to be texting far more often than you’re comfortable with.

Digital “FOMO”: If you’re not up-to-date on the latest social media posts, will it prevent you from feeling like you can participate in real-life conversations at school the next day?

Attachment to actual devices: If your phone is out of reach, will your privacy be invaded? Will you miss a message from a friend when he needs you?

For Parents, Strategies on Mitigating Anxiety — Without Overreacting

With so many different stressors, a key piece of advice for parents is to individualize your approach. In the same way that different teenagers need different types of social support from their parents, they need different types of digital support, as well. Weinstein suggests that if your teen seems irritable or overwhelmed by social media, pay attention to what specifically is causing those feelings.

Giller agrees. “Really check in with your teen about what’s going on,” she says. Parents can and should help support and problem-solve with their teen, but they should also offer validation about how difficult these situations can be.

Relatedly, don’t just take your teen’s phone away if you suspect drama. Doing so won’t get to the heart of the social issue at play — and it could potentially make your teen more upset by separating her from her friends and other aspects of digital media she enjoys.

However, as a family, you can also set screen-free times — whether it’s every evening after 9 p.m., on the car ride to school, an occasional screen-free weekend, or longer stretches over vacations and camps. “Many teens say they appreciate” these chances, says education writer Anya Kamenetz, whose upcoming book The Art of Screen Time: How Your Family Can Balance Digital Media and Real Life explores these issues in-depth.

A significant part of your teen’s phone habits may be related to her parents, too. “Be good role models in your own use of tech,” advises Kamenetz. That means being mindful of your own distracted habit of reaching for your cell, but it also means rejecting the isolation that screen time can generate. Make digital media an opportunity for real-life social opportunities, she says. Share some media activities with your teenager — playing games, watching YouTube clips, or reading up on mutual interests together.

And in most situations, it’s best to work with your teen to set social media expectations. “You want to build consensus and get their buy-in,” says Kamenetz. Constant surveillance or control won’t build trust. Make it an open, mutual discussion.

You want to get teens to put their devices down on their own, says Weinstein, “so that you’re helping them build their ability to manage their interactions with and through technology.” And that’s increasingly looking like a key life skill that we’ll all need to develop, now and into the future.

Leah Shafer is a staff writer for Usable Knowledge, which translates education research and well-tested practices so they’re accessible to practitioners, policymakers, and parents. Usable Knowledge is based at the Harvard Graduate School of Education.

How Parents Can Help Kids Navigate the Pressures of Their Digital Lives published first on http://ift.tt/2xi3x5d

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bisoroblog · 6 years

Text

How Parents Can Help Kids Navigate the Pressures of Their Digital Lives

Parents, all too often, just want to grab their teen’s phone and stuff it in a drawer. But is social media and the omnipresence of digital interactions really the cause of all this anxiety?

The short answer is: It’s complicated.

A Link Between Social Media and Mental Health Concerns

Teenage Challenges and Stressors, Exacerbated

What’s Triggering about Social Media? Youth and technology expert Amanda Lenhart’s 2015 Pew study of teens, technology, and friendships reveals a range of social media-induced stressors:

Seeing people posting about events to which you haven’t been invited

Feeling pressure to post positive and attractive content about yourself

Feeling pressure to get comments and likes on your posts

Having someone post things about you that you cannot change or control

In analyses of thousands of adolescents’ reactions to digital stressors, Weinstein and her colleagues have found even more challenges:

Feeling replaceable: If you don’t respond to a best friend’s picture quickly or effusively enough, will she find a better friend?

Too much communication: A boyfriend or girlfriend wants you to be texting far more often than you’re comfortable with.

Digital “FOMO”: If you’re not up-to-date on the latest social media posts, will it prevent you from feeling like you can participate in real-life conversations at school the next day?

Attachment to actual devices: If your phone is out of reach, will your privacy be invaded? Will you miss a message from a friend when he needs you?

For Parents, Strategies on Mitigating Anxiety — Without Overreacting

How Parents Can Help Kids Navigate the Pressures of Their Digital Lives published first on http://ift.tt/2y2Rir2

0 notes