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#its like okay they better a decent amount of time figuring it out

sexhaver · 10 months

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ive been playing Cassette Beasts for a minute and it never stops being funny to me how flagrant they are about making this "Pokemon but with features you didn't know Pokemon has always needed". off the top of my head:

super effective/NVE hits have added benefits/debuffs beyond just doubling/halving the damage (hitting Electric types with Ground reduces their evasion and speed, hitting Steel types with Poison gives them poison-coated spikes that do contact damage, etc)

legally-distinct-Pokemon will learn new moves while in your party without having to battle, and you can then straight up steal these moves from them and put them on a not-Pokemon you actually care about using, which gives an actual incentive to hunt down and raise otherwise fringe not-mons beyond completing the not-Pokedex

we all played the Pokemon Infinite Fusion fangame right? we know how fusions work? okay so this game has them as temporary per-battle things instead of permanent ones, which is only marginally less cool while being infinitely easier to balance around

attempting to catch something shows you the percentage chance of success so you know whether you just got unlucky or if you should save your Pokeballs-i-mean-blank-cassette-tapes

leveling up is tied to your not-trainer instead of your not-pokemon, so you don't end up in the classic trap where your starter is way overleveled and everything else is underleveled and then you hit a fight your starter can't solo and have to spend an hour grinding to get the weaker not-mons up to par (funnily enough most Pokemon Nuzlocke romhacks have already figured this out and give you infinite rare candies with the only restriction being that you can't level past the next gym leader's ace pokemon, because Pokemon fans have realized that grinding is the worst part of the game way before Game Freak has)

moves, not-Pokeballs, not-PokeCenter visits, and healing items are all bought using entirely separate currencies which stops you from trivially breaking the economy in half

the soundtrack, fittingly, is pretty good! the vocals were a bit much for my taste but there's an option in the settings menu to straight up turn them off (letting the BGM play on its own), which i've never seen in any other game and really appreciate

downsides:

on a game design level, i understand why can i only carry a max of 5 not-Potions and 1 not-Revive at a time - it's to put a limit on how far away from fast travel points i can get by just running away from everything and healing off damage. on a gameplay level, however, this feels pretty bad

the pixel art style is trying to look as much like Pokemon as possible without actually being Pokemon so the overworld sprites look more like beta stuff from Pokemon that they cut for looking too weird. i have yet to find a haircut that doesn't look bad

this is super petty of me but something about the bloom and lighting of the 3d environments combined with pixelated 2d sprites that still cast shadows makes me painfully aware im playing a video game. it's like they were going for the same aesthetic as Octopath Traveler but fell just barely short. i can't think of a better way to articulate this feeling but if you know you know

it does that really obnoxious half-assed style of voice acting where plot-relevant characters will sometimes (maybe every third or fourth textbox) speak the first two or three words of dialogue before trailing off. mashing through textboxes (as one does) means constantly getting jumpscared by "hmm"s and "haha!"s "okay then!"s

i get that they wanted to make the player feel involved in the story, and it has a pretty decent hook so far, but oh my god. the amount of dialogue "choices" that just transparently do not matter. you know how people memed on Fallout 3 and 4's dialogue choices all leading to the same outcome, to the extent that you were basically choosing between "yes" and "yes (rude)"? and you know how Bethesda would at least attempt to justify how both options led to you accepting the quest anyways, even if it was really dumb? Cassette Beasts has streamlined this process even further by making the options in most of their binary decisions so identical that they don't even require different followup dailogue before rejoining into the main conversation thread. a solid 2/3rds of the dialogue options in this game so far feel like checks that you're still awake. i know this is a minor issue because people aren't playing Pokemon-likes for the engaging "choices matter" approach to storytelling, and i did ignore it at first, but it's so pervasive that you really can't ignore it

#cassette beasts

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carsonian · 11 months

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Steve/Tony fic recs | theme: "SOFT"

I've read a decent number of SteveTony fics and I wanted to give an indecent amount of love back to the writers who put out such gawrjus pieces. The theme for this list is "SOFT" in capital letters because it's not your average erectile-dysfunction soft but some real silk-scarf soft shit. You know, the classics: the diabetic stuff, the ooey-gooey stuff, the puddle of feelings stuff...

Now I don't want NOBODY saying, girl, I've read that, are you being for real? Because guess what? I am always being for real and these fics are real, and you can always re-read them. So spread the love. Respect!

"There's an App for That" by Annie D (scaramouche) (@no-gorms) - I know you're looking at me and saying, aight look Carsonian, whatchu takin me for? You think I'm some greenhorn mark to put down a flag for SteveTony witout cracking Annie D's stash three times whole? Well, to that I raise: my glass. Cuz samesies. But truuuuust me, this fic is worth the re-read. It is a stroke of genuine AU brilliance that doesn't get the hype it deserves (a billion kudos of hype pls!). Super solid set-up, refreshingly quick lines, the kind of easygoing falling together that is just jazzy to relish. This fic is like a date with an almond huddled inside. Sweet and mushy but with a surprisingly solid bite at its core. Summary goes:

Thanks to the modern gig economy, Steve is the successful owner of a break-up service, i.e. people pay him to break up with their partners for them. One day, he gets the first break-up request for Tony Stark.

😏 Uh-huh. Oh okay. Meet-awkwuuurd time. J.A.R.V.I.S., cue up "Start of Something New" by HSM. 😏

"The First Time I Went Dancing Sober" by schemingreader - This fic is like good wine; it ages like a beauty. This month will make it ten (10!!!) years since it was published but by God does it hold up. It holds me up. Like a firm but comfortable back brace. Summary goes:

Steve Rogers is a great physical therapist who works with sick kids. Tony Stark is a damaged biotech engineering genius who really wants to be one of the good guys.

You.... you know the vibes, don't you? You--uh, you catch the flow? Yeah, you do. C'mon, read this fic and give me a hug, brother. I'll clasp you close and whisper homoerotic sweet-nothings into your ear while we hug, partner. It'll be silly romantic, bro.

"we pick ourselves undone" by laramara (@commandersteverogers) - Another old-but-gold fic. Hang on, read the summary first:

It might appear that award-winning surgeon Tony Stark, the head of neurosurgery at Shield Hospital, well and truly has his life together. Now if he could only figure out how to tell people that his father, world class neurosurgeon Howard Stark, is locked away in a nursing home with Alzheimer’s, devise a way to get Chief Fury off his back for good, and work out what the hell he’s going to do about the weird on-again-off-again thing he has going with the head of cardio, he’d finally have everything sorted.

Now that's what I'm motherfucking talking about. This fic is also ten years old et voilà: a certified historical moment. When I first read this, I thought about quitting fic writing; it's that good. And then I re-read it and life was okay again. Tee El Dee Arr: I want to give this fic a smooch on the mouth and a sincere insurance plan.

"for better or for worse" by earliebirb (@earliebirb) - This is the fic you re-read when you want to remember why you're into Steve/Tony. It's iddy, it's tender, it's achey but beyond all a that, it's SOFT. Soft like whipped cream. Soft like a vanilla ice cream milkshake. Soft like Tony's tush and Steve's tits. R-E-S-P-E-C-T! Summary goes:

Sitting quietly like this, Tony can almost pretend that nothing has happened, that this is just another normal day of Steve waking up in bed next to him. Married and in love with no threat of divorce looming on the horizon. Of course, that is before he catches sight of Steve’s bereft ring finger. He wonders how long it has been since Steve’s ring finger is empty. He wonders if he should start taking off his own, too. He wonders if Steve wants him to take it off.

I know, I know, you're going: Carsonian, wyot the hell, this sounds like angsty stuff. Shhh. Shhhhh. Shhh. I'll get my hand off your mouth just as soon as you start listening. Sport, this is the ooey-gooey stuff. All of the angst is the hot chocolate fudge. It's what makes the milkshake so bloody damn good. Now get da fuck outta here and read this fic!!! Or re-read this fic!!! It's worth it! (Just like Steve & Tony's relationship in the fic, shhh no spoilers.)

Warmest and Brightest by ishipallthings (@ishipallthings) - Naww shuddup I don't want to hear any accusations of favouritism. Yeah I think Jen is aces, but I'm not speaking from a place of bias when I say her fics are aces too. It has been scientifically proven. By Tony. And me. Here's the source. Also, I read this WAYYYY back when, and put it down in my list as "sitcom/hallmark set up with stevetony charm". So if you're into that, you know what to do. And if you're not into that, get da fuck outta here!!! You can not NOT be into that. Okay but if you're seriously not into that, no judgement. Okay, a little judgement. With 100% love. Summary goes:

It’s Christmas Eve, and Tony’s supposed to be getting decorations ready for his and Rhodey’s Christmas bash in their new apartment. Instead, he’s stuck in an elevator with the hot guy from 12A Steve, who doesn’t seem to be in much of a festive mood. It turns out to be a bit of a holiday miracle.

Y'know what else is a miracle? How I got through this fic without kicking my feet up like a gleeful teen in a 2000s romcom. Y'know what else? I totally didn't get through this fic without doing that. Maybe the miracle is in the friends we made along the way 🧑‍🤝‍🧑(that's me n u, babey, holding hands as we watch Steve and Tony debate superior rom-coms into a relationship).

"One Last Christmas" by Captain_Panda - Speakin' of Xmas miracles, here's another fic that is super soft and set during the Christmas holiday period. And YEAH I'll admit it FINE FINE. I'm deffo playing favourites here....but as we all know, I am a Captain_Panda fan first 😤❗, a SteveTony fic enthusiast second. Respect!!! Summary goes:

You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch. The year is 2012. Cuddly-as-a-cactus Tony Stark is throwing a Christmas party for his fellow Avengers. It's all going really well--except for Tony, who is quietly succumbing to his own demons.

You see how the summary says "cuddly-as-a-cactus"? Well, it don't matter because the fic will cuddle you anyway. Tony gets cuddles, we get cuddles, the world gets a cuddle. It's all cuddles in here and you best believe I'm weeping at the slumber party. In this fic, the world is soft and rough-edged and love is worth losing for. It's beautiful. Gawly I'm weeping again. Last time I read this fic, I wrote this in my comment and it still holds true.

And that's all she w"rec"ked!

Go forth: SteveTony lovers, fuckers, ambassadors, champions, perverts, freaks, losers, dreamers, legends! Read, re-read, kudo, comment, spread legs and spread love.

#fic recs #stevetony #if any of the fic writers want me to untag them give me a shout #anyway i know a lot of these are *known* fics but HEY this is a fic REC post #not a hidden gems post #that's a different draft altogether....

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llamagoddessofficial · 2 years

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Could you please give more eldritch au headcannons? 🥺

Sans

The eldritch creatures don’t talk to each other much. They don’t need one another the way humans might need one another. Sometimes, they can go decades without speaking.

... Sans wants someone to talk to.

He likes talking to her. He likes it so much. He could talk to her for a thousand years and never tire- and believe him, he isn’t exaggerating. He knows precisely how long a thousand years is.

Occasionally, he reads her mind to have conversation topics he knows she’ll enjoy. He also occasionally reads her mind to find the best words to soothe her gnawing fears.

Well... okay, ‘occasionally’ is an understatement, he reads her mind all the time. It’s such a pretty mind, he really can’t resist diving into it. All those lovely lights and colours.

He’s desperate to actually be in her head. There’s a difference between reading a mind and touching it, and he’s obsessed with her every thought. But Mc asked him not to mess with her head, and he’s trying to be her friend, so he had no choice but to agree.

His advice about this strange, terrible world she’s found herself in is invaluable to her and her friends. Red would just prefer she let him protect her, but Sans actually gives her important information on how to kill/avoid/escape any number of threats, not to mention gather resources and stay warm. Despite his coldness, her friends quite like him because of this.

His ultimate aim is to figure out a way to ‘save’ her by finding a portal back to her home dimension. He would then follow her right through. This dimension has nothing left for him- he’s eager to see what delights await in her home.

Red

Red has thousands of little tricks that he uses to get her to instinctively like him without realising. When he’s got a ‘humanoid’ form he manually moves his chest fractions of an inch to simulate breathing, he ‘blinks’ his eyelights and ‘hums’ when thinking, he scratches the back of his neck as if he feels anything there. His personal favourite trick is how, if he lets off a little magic at the right temperature, it perfectly mimics body heat- he can see how she can’t help but move closer to him.

Of course, it’s a dangerous tightrope to walk. He puts a lot of effort into his humanoid act... when he does slip up and do something incredibly inhuman the impact is much bigger. Sometimes, big enough to scare her away from him for a decent amount of time.

... He’s gradually getting better at being faux humanoid, though. Reading her thoughts (despite the fact that he promised not to) on his act definitely helps. Sometimes it can be difficult, when her subconscious acts too fast for him to correct his behaviour... but he’s learning.

(He finds it cute how humans consider mind reading as something intruding, an invasion of privacy... as if all their thoughts aren’t just hanging out in the open like that.)

Her friends like him. He’s great at showing them good places to hide, set up camp, etc. He’s eager to show her that he’s the one she should trust and default to.

As much as he’d like to, he can’t stay around her camp forever. Eldritch beings need to feed, too, and he likes to hunt... he’d rather she didn’t see that.

There's a reason he knows the human body well enough to mimic it. Mc and her friends aren't the first humans to end up trapped here... he's killed a few lost souls, eager to know how their tiny, intricate little bodies work.

Of course, he'll never tell her that. No one needs to know.

Skull

He knows humans frighten easily. He used to revel in it, a cat revelling in a struggling bug pinned under its paw. But now, he just wishes she would stop hiding... just come out. Look at him. look at me.

... The first time they met, he had just killed a human he caught. She screamed a lot when she saw the mangled, torn up body. He thought maybe she wanted it fixed- but she kept screaming, even when he put the arms back on and offered her the ‘mended’ corpse.

He knows the other entities must be hiding her. There’s no other way she could disappear like that so often... it makes him angry, they get so much time with her, they should share.

Red and Sans aren’t... afraid of Skull, so to speak. They just know what he’s capable of, and aren’t keen on getting in his way.

At first, every time he found a human that isn’t her, he got angry and crushed it. But the sound of screaming reminded him that humans always get so upset when one of their own is killed. He doesn’t want her to get upset. Now, he just lets them go.

... He knows where the human camps are. He visits them during his searches for her, and his presence shuts everything down as everyone scrambles to hide before the massive red spotlight casts over them. If he knows she’s there, but just hiding from him, he gets noticeably angry when he leaves- one time, after waiting for an hour and seeing no sign of her leaving her hiding spot, he showed his frustration by dropping a dead animal into the middle of the camp.

It was a very large dead animal. A predator- probably the kind of animal she and her friends would usually have to run from.

... Just stop avoiding him.

Stop hiding

He only wa̶nts t̵o̵ p̷͔̓̒͝l̶̊a̸̔̌͗y̴̞̆̑̾͑

#llamagines #eldritch au #mc: AAAAAAAAAAAAA #skull: why are you screaming?? i put the head back on. it's all fixed. do you want the eyes back too? please stop screaming.

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theresawritesstuff · 11 months

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On my knees begging for a response letter from Lenny per your most recent prompt

p.s. Wanted to let you know how appreciated and admired your work is—Guess Who’s Coming to Yom Kippur is an all time favorite

Thank you so much! ❤️❤️❤️ I've had so much fun writing these crazy lovebirds. Guess Who's Coming to Yom Kippur was my first go at writing for the Maisel fandom and it has been so touching hearing how many people it's resonated with. I've loved writing it every step of the way. I think I originally came up with the vague idea while watching season 3? After I caught up on season 4 I finally decided to take the dive. And here we are! Just goes to show it's never to late to write the fic. It's becoming a series because I fell in love with the story and the more I write, the more I discover yet to tell.

And now, by popular demand, let's here from Lenny...

Dear Midge,

No gout here out west as far as I'm aware. It's a big state, so there's probably some poor schmuck stuck with it out there but the Bruce family abode remains unscathed.

It's nice to hear from you. I dig the pink stationary. Is it lightly scented? Or am I imagining things? Quite possible. I've been thinking about you too.

California is okay. Still adjusting to the amount of sunshine and phony smiles, still can't find a decent deli, but Kitty is here and she's great. That's my daughter's name, by the way. I don't know if your delicate headwear would fit over my ego bloated cranium but I'm sure she would love to add to her dress up collection. We've been raiding my mother's limited stash in the meantime.

There's no one else who's turned my head. I'm starting to think no one else ever could. It's like my nose became a compass that fateful rainy night we shared the back of that cop car, with you as my true north.

Perhaps that's how we always seem to find each other.

As much as I'm sure the neighbors would love the show, the streaking is unnecessary. You've always had my attention. I've been captivated by you from the very start. Since you saw through my bullshit and asked me point blank if I loved it.

If you simply must be naked, I am powerless to stop you. All I ask is a chance at a private audience.

I've often considered the calculation of time zones well into the night as well, if I'm being honest, but well… maybe we can revisit that another time.

I wouldn't mind seeing you behind Gordon's desk, but I'd much rather you get paid for it. Or have your own desk, better yet.

I'm proud of you for keeping at it. It's not an easy game, this comedy shit. And television is a whole other ball field. All the censors and meddling producers. Audiences across America to play to instead of the folks right in front of you. But I still believe you can do anything you set your mind to. Just keep looking for that spotlight. You'll know it when you see it.

As for the thank yous of your letter, it was always my pleasure. Lending a hand, an ear, a shoulder, the coat off your back… It's what you do for the ones you love.

You know…I've always been partial to blue but between that negligee and the shades of your eyes it's cemented its place as my favorite color. And the night at the Mayflower… I want you to know you were always worth the wait.

If you do ever find yourself with a ticket to the west coast, perhaps we could find ourselves in another someday.

I've still got the legal stuff, and now the kid stuff, and some of my other stuff…but I'm trying to figure it out. Be someone worthy of worshiping your show corset. Or the dentist corset. Do you have a corset reserved for air travel? I'd be interested to find out, if you'll let me.

I can't make you any promises. God knows you deserve so much more than I can offer. But a part of me holds out hope all the same, selfish as it may be.

Give Peluso my regards.

Yours. Always.

Lenny

#midge x lenny #midgelenny #tmmm fic #Follow up ficlet #Love letters

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witheredtoashes · 20 days

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The Mind of Reggie Might

fucking hell I got dragged into a new interest so here's my analysis

Basically, I was watching simo's most recent stream, and I noticed some things behind how he talks to Billy

I know.. a decent amount of Reggie's behavior and character from a friend, but this is also like my second stream I've watched so bear with me LMAO

Here we go

He’s challenging and pushing Billy by saying he’s incapable. Reggie works off of spite, he’s trying to do the same with Billy

“So why do you think if I give you this chance- that I don’t have some kind of faith you can pull it off.” Hes saying to Billy "You can do this, I know you can, but you need to show me you can, and you’re not."

Let's be honest, this entire project of Billy's is a challenge. Reggie/Simo has said it himself, Reggie is making this a challenge for Billy so he can go to the rest of the company and tell them that Billy is capable, and can handle more responsibility. He knows Billy is capable, but this is going to be tangible PROOF of that. It can't be argued.

Hes asking Billy why he isn’t like “fuck yeah, I can do this, this is what I need to do”, and that's his way of telling him about the challenge.

“Prove them wrong” Reggie knows he’s capable and smarter than this, but using the excuse and view of others to say that LMAO. Cause reggie will never say to Billy that he's doing good or capable, cause it gives the illusion that he WONT drop him if he fucks up. It makes Billy think he's safe and can fuck around, when he can't. He's not at that level yet. Again, Simo has SAID that reggie will never tell him he's doing good.

“Sink or swim” Part of the challenge is figuring out what he needs to succeed. If he needs a Billy, he needs to find and get one himself. Basically, no shit this is a lot of work and you’ll need help with it, but YOU need to source and find that help yourself to get it done.

Recognize the issue (needing help) and solve it (getting help) instead of relying on others to do it for you.

Its another part of the test, making sure he can problem solve and be self sufficient, and thrive when no one else will help him. Hes making him figure out how to get help himself.

Billy can use spite to work, and reggie saw that, so he’s using spite again to push Billy to figure it out. Even if it didn’t work out great the first time, cause Billy was thinking more out of spite and less “okay, this is what I need to do this right”. Hence the shitty Billy that didn’t help him- he needs to find people, or find out how, to command others and get them to work. Not just because he was told to, because then he’ll get shitty parts and it won’t do any good. He needs to think, then get the good pieces so he can make the entire machine run better.

Find the right people, the right pieces, to get the job done right.

Reggie is SMART, this is meant to teach Billy a shit ton of how to make it in this world.

He’s pushing his head underwater so Billy is forced to find a more efficient way to swim.

Billy can’t just do the task, he needs to find a way to do it EFFICIENTLY and make it better in the end. So, he gives him a super hard task so he HAS to find a better way, and it’s a skill he’ll learn to use in the future. He’s forcing him to learn these skills, because if Billy can’t, then he doesn’t have the resourcefulness or ability to adapt and address things in a smart way, and he’s not cut out for this.

It’s a trial by fire, and he wants to see him come out fireproof. He knows he can.

He's TRYING to tell him how to do it, he's hinting at it and practically telling him, but Billy doesn't get the point

Billy saying hes dissapointed in reggie and how he should have been handling this better is HILARIOUS, because its exactly what reggie is thinking and should be telling HIM. Reggie is dissapointed, because Billy should have handled this better.

"Youre not a project manager" he's telling reggie everything he should be telling himself. Reggie doesn't give a SHIT about what Billy is saying because he knows he can do it. BILLY still needs to prove he can.

Reggie doesn't need a title or validation, and Billy needs to learn that too. Billy looks for too much help, he looks too much at others, he needs to know how to do it HIMSELF. Like, how reggie gets it done.

Reggie works with tough love. He wants to see people succeed, he wants to help them, but if he just helps them, they'll never learn to take care of themselves. Only those that have proven themselves (like KJ) as people he can trust and that can handle themselves, he'll help freely.

So, he forces them to learn. He cares, but he forces them to learn themselves, and that's how he shows that care. By helping them get better. Otherwise, he won't spare them a second glance, because they aren't worth his time.

"Just say 'I've fucking got this, you dipshit." Reggie is TELLING him he can do it, but Billy needs to believe he can do it, then suit up and do whatever has to be done to GET it done. Whether that's putting the plants on hold to find a Billy of his own, or make a better spreadsheet.

Meanwhile, reggie can't resist a puzzle and got sucked into figuring out the plants himself. Which, the slow tiptoeing around the edge until he falls onto the rabbit hole was ALMOST as funny as his descent into madness towards the end of stream.

Thats all. Simo, if you see this, tell me how I did describing a character "more complex than you"

#nopixel #nopixel 4.0 #reggie might #billy thorne #This Australian Fucker #fucking vegemite ass #character analysis #reggie analysis #The mind of Reggie Might #Honestly he's such a fun character to dissect

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fluffy-critter · 2 months

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#crosspost #busybee

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trashland-llamas · 1 year

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Neko

Hizashi offers the neighborhood stray shelter during the storm or the neighborhood stray ends up being a Neko named Aizawa

Hizashi decided to put out a dish with cat food out, worried for the kitty’s safety with the upcoming storm. The last one he’d witnessed years prior ended in flash flooding. Hizashi assumed the cat had an owner due to the little ensemble it had going on but that they worked long hours. Multiple silver chains connecting to a chunky spiked collar. A skull and crossbones charm on the side of the main collar. It’s yellow eyes looking permanently tired, scruffy fur needing a bath.

Aizawa was extremely grateful towards the blond, thankful for somewhat looking after him. For some reason, he’d been unable to shift back into human form for roughly a year. Forcing himself to ‘turn off’ his human brain in a sense whenever he ate the seldom amount of food he’d caught for the day. The same going for when the only water available was puddles. Unable to use water fountains, not wanting to expend what little energy he had in the needed parkour. So when he finally stumbled upon Hizashi’s abode, a brief break for the newly establish nomad was paradise. Quickly memorizing the human’s schedule, darting across the lawn early in the morning. Hizashi sharing his food despite chiding ‘oh I shouldn’t be feeding you this, you’ll get sick.’

Currently the cat was shaking from its perch under the porch. Storms never bothered him until becoming a neko. Hissing with each clap of thunder. ‘Ah poor kitty,’ Hizashi keeping his distance as to not overwhelm the cat. His heart breaking at the distressed look in the yellow eyes peering out at him. ‘It’s just me, can you crawl towards me?’ Seeing the familiar blond, hair sans spikes brought some comfort. Knowing the man wouldn’t purposely harm him. ‘There you go, now I’m just going to pick you up okay?’ Questioning whether the cat’s nod was it understanding Hizashi’s request.

‘You’re safe now, no scary thunder or lightning to get you here.’ Hizashi cooed into the cat’s ear, cradling it as he walked through his front door. Aizawa hopping out of Hizashi’s arms once crossing the threshold, his new hiding spot being behind the couch. ‘Freshen it up, no wet kibble.’ He figured the best course of action was a slow approach. Smiling when Aizawa rubbed his side against Hizashi’s leg. A low purr accompanying it.

Feeling a pair of yellow eyes on him, Hizashi patted his leg. 'You're free to jump up here, unless you want to be picked up again little prince.' Aizawa conflicted as he was ironically never one for pet names. Choosing to be a brat, the neko gracefully leaped up, taking residence in Hizashi's lap. Aizawa tilted his head, feeling the human lightly tug at his collar. 'Want to see if you have an owner.'

'Aizawa, that's a pretty name. Suits you, princey.' The neko cursing himself on the inside, ducking his head in embarrassment. 'Let me put on a movie, sound out the scary thunder. Ooh! We can be thunder buddies.'

Aizawa couldn't recall when either of them fell asleep or that they'd relocated to the younger's bedroom. Sobering up as the cough he let out exuded human qualities. No, no, no. He didn't want the first time they met to be like this but alas, he was unable to control the scenario. Quickly hiding beneath the covers. Adjusting the collars to fit better, more akin to a choker instead. 'What--Who are--Aizawa?'

Hizashi woke up with panic, the view of shaggy black hair unfamiliar to him. As unfamiliar as the lanky man occupying the space next to him. All he remembered was Aizawa, placing the tiny kitty on his chest so that he wouldn't wake up alone the next morning. But this person was a stranger. Until he saw the stranger's choker. 'Uh, this is weird so I hope you don't mind explaining. But uh, are you at least decent under there?' Sighing as the raven haired male shook his head no. 'Okay, I'll go find some clothes, plenty of my friends have left stuff behind. Something's bound to fit you. Then you can explain over breakfast?' Hizashi running off before Aizawa could even respond.

'So let me get this straight, you're basically a cat hybrid that's been unable to return to human form due to a quirk user?'

'Yes. I didn't mean to lie to you but I didn't really know how I could tell you without it sounding insane. Plus I liked not being alone.' Aizawa's voice raspy after not using it for months. Forming syllables felt foreign in his mouth and to his ears. Hizashi letting him take his time. 'I won't deny that this whole situation is weird or at least to me, it is. But I've gotten used to you being around. Your cat form, and as I'm sure you're aware, there's a spare bedroom.'

'Your offering me to stay?'

'Were you listening? Yes, little prince, I'm offering you to stay.' Hizashi beaming as Aizawa's ears burned red.

#erasermic #aizawa shouta #hizashi yamada #my hero academia #bnha #bnha aizawa #bnha hizashi #mha #mha aizawa #mha hizashi #not x reader #cat au #cat!au

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acemapleeh · 2 years

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Bridge Over Anxious Coffee Cups

May 25th: Living Together/ Domestic

Summary: The morning is early and already, Matthew's thoughts and heart are far too loud. The morning fog rolls gently over the canal waters.

Written for Day 3 of @nedcanweek, May 25th: Living Together/ Domestic

Characters: Netherlands, Canada

Word Count: 2580

Read on ao3

Warnings: Sexual Content, Self-Hate

September of 1980, Appingedam, Netherlands

Johan liked sticking to a routine, planned things in advance and kept his word on being exactly where he said he would be on any given day. His body naturally rose around the same time each morning; it never mattered if it was for work or if he was on holiday or what hour he stayed up to the night before. It was always around the time the first bit of sunlight would trickle patterns in through the lace curtains that he would begin to stir. It was harder to rise when Matthew was there, but he would somehow ease his way out of his embrace; promises were kissed on Matt’s shoulders and stubbly cheeks only for them to be met with a grumble and slight shift of the mattress.

Matthew’s mornings were slow and lazy, wrapped in soft linen and hoping for warm limbs for hours on end. He was never an early riser and if he managed to get up at a decent hour, he would never be up for long. The kisses would always pull at his heart but they weren’t always strong enough to rouse him from bed. He hated how early Jan got up, even with the knowledge he would come back if Matt hadn’t moved for a set amount of time.

Still.

When Matthew was finally done hiding his face in Jan’s still warm pillow and complaining about the lack of warmth to nobody, he’d pull himself up from the bed with rumpled sheets wrapped around himself and shuffle his way to the kitchen.

A hot cup of coffee in his favorite overseas mug always waited for him.

Perfectly sweet.

Perfectly capable of clearing the fog of his sleep-hazed mind.

That wasn’t the case every day.

Some mornings, Matthew wouldn’t let Jan go, tangling himself as much as possible so neither would have the processing power to get themselves up and away. Jan would be persuaded with licks on his exposed clavicle and tender circles rubbed into his chest. How quickly he was reduced to trembling and caving into the suggestions whispered in his ear. Further away he melted at the kisses on his throat.

There were also times when Matt would be the first to rise. He would blink sleepily as his mind tried to figure out where he was, and slowly, he would realize just how entangled he was in Jan’s arms. He held him for dear life; it felt like if he let go, Jan would disappear like he was nothing but a dream. He clung to him, heart trembling, despite the solid foundations they had worked so hard to build together.

He had tried getting better.

To try to correct his spiraling thoughts.

'How could he be possibly okay with a such useless, fucking sack of emotional distress like me?'

Matthew would go sunless months feeling devoid of anything, hiding away somewhere in the deep forests and tundra of home in hopes that something out there would bring him solace. The first time he’d done it since he started dating Jan, he came home to an answering machine full of messages asking where he had been.

Johan flew out to Ottawa the day after Matthew called him back and Jan clung to him the same way Matthew clung to him now.

Matt had never felt so cold in his entire life.

On those endless nights, where he felt his thoughts consume him, he would trace fingertips along Jan’s bare chest; he would move slowly, waiting for the lace to trickle in its morning call. He had to assure himself Jan was real and tangible. Fingers danced along his toned stomach and the dips of his hips to where only the thin sheet hid any more secrets.

A whispered reveal.

Further along, they moved to the base of his shaft and combed mindlessly over the wiry hairs surrounding it. It was only another moment before Jan stirred with a slight groan.

He wondered vaguely if the man thought he was dreaming as well.

“Lieverd...” Jan finally moaned in that voice he wished was meant for his ears alone.

“Godverdomme,” he breathed, hips beginning to rut into the circle of Matthew’s fist.

“Mattijs...”

It was the most beautiful sound Matthew had ever heard.

He moved to lay beside him and adjusted his grip to wrap his hand around both of their leaking members. The strokes were unhurried, even as Matt’s breath turned into impatient whimpers. Jan’s hand soon joined and it felt like every one of his nerves were awake and in need. He buried his face in the other’s shoulder and Johan smelled like yesterday’s blissful, after-sex shower. His free hand gripped his back, nails digging and afraid everything would float away if he dared let go.

Matthew cried out softly as he found the sweetness of release.

His heart wouldn’t stop beating.

Thumping, thumping, thumping.

His stomach felt like a fish was flopping inside- afraid of its death as it gasped desperately inside the confines of the net.

Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump.

Body alert, prepared to find the oncoming attack. There were no weapons. There was no way to defend himself.

Beating and beating; the pulse in his ears simply wouldn’t stop.

Matthew laid on his stomach, head spinning and dazed. Jan’s body was warm beneath his and a gentle hand rubbed along the ridges of his spine, tenderly attending to the knot in his shoulder he felt he could never truly be rid of.

It made his stomach twist.

A kiss.

An apology.

A question.

An apology for an apology.

Lingering silence.

The room was grey and even with the curtains drawn back, little light came in.

Here was daylight, covered up with pouring rain, not that it was unusual this time of year.

Matt slowly reached for the nightstand for his glasses, peeling away from the sanctuary of affirmation to try and locate one of his discarded shirts. He roused himself with a back-popping stretch and cringed as his shoulder tingled.

Some unnamable, emotional feeling continued to burrow into his chest, making his heart lurch as his arms pulled through the sweater.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know what came over me.”

“Matthew, it’s fine. Just take a minute to calm down and you’ll be alright.”

“No, you don’t know that. You’re going to ask how late I stayed up last night, how much sleep I got if I want coffee, and if I want to talk about it.” He was attempting to pull his sweats on, wanting nothing more than to leave and not wanting to look at his long, crooked legs a second longer. “I don’t want to talk about it because there’s nothing to talk about it. I’m fine. You don’t need to tell me I’m fine.”

He cursed as he checked his hip on the bedpost in his rush to leave the room.

The stairs leading to the kitchen felt too large, and Matthew had to think a little too much about each step to avoid tripping and falling.

Maybe he’d feel better if he laid a crumpled heap at the bottom of the stairs.

The window overlooking the Damsterdiep Canal held too many scenes of a time long ago. Running a now washed hand slowly over the wood he shaped himself, lost in a time away, he didn’t hear Jan come downstairs to start boiling water. He watched a couple in their kayaks float along the water, the low clouds seeming to part at each stroke of their paddles as they made their way through the mist.

Another pair was seated on their patio across the way, sipping coffee and chatting about intimate, morning thoughts when the backdoor creaked open. They turned to see the face of a small child who looked just tall enough to reach the doorknob. She was crying, even Matt could tell from here. The father quickly set his cup down to pick her up, giving his wife a reassuring look for her to stay as he went back inside.

Not much had changed since Matt helped Jan rebuild this home after the war other than how much older that once small boy had grown.

And here he was again, to help bring this star city back to shining its brilliant light.

A steaming mug was set in front of him that he accepted quietly.

“You’re different from the last time you were here.”

Jan’s own kayak was tied up at the makeshift dock attached to the bottom floor, resting in the shadow of the hanging kitchen. Matt could just go down the stairs and make his way out into the fog.

Never to be seen again.

He sipped his coffee and the thought slowly dissipated like the sun was starting to peak through the clouds.

“I don’t mean that in a bad way,” Jan tried to clear up after the extensive silence. “Believe it or not, you look better.”

Matt almost snorted into his coffee, it mostly turning into an exasperated huff.

“My hair is touching my shoulders and I just panicked after having an orgasm. Tell me how that’s better than the me just after the war trying to remember how to function as a person.”

“You still came here to work and spend time with me. We both know what you’re more tempted to do when you get like this.”

At that, Matt bit his lip before silently taking another sip. He didn’t want to admit how much the idea still gnawed at his mind. Matthew had hidden this part of himself from Jan as long as he was able to, blaming tiredness or bad weather on days where his self-deprecation clung like spider webs to his every thought. But silently, he pressed himself a little closer to Johan which was met with a kiss on the side of his head.

“Is it just because I’m young?” Matthew finally asked, chewing the inside of his cheek between the spaces of his words. “That calling to be lost?”

He could feel Jan shake his head. “I think we, as nations, experience it when we need to experience it. Even to this day, I’ll find my feet taking me to my coasts or endless fields. But my youth had me behind the wheel of a ship with only the desire to keep on sailing. I lost myself to the sea the same way you lose yourself to the trees.”

Matthew could envision it clearly before him, the rough callouses of Jan’s hands forever the telltale sign that he was a man of the sea. He’d seen those same hands that ran smoothly through his hair at work, completely mesmerized by the way Johan would tie off knots and the muscles of his arms tugged at ropes. How strongly he desired to show he was just as capable at sailing from everything his father had taught him.

The waves hadn’t been the only thing to rock Matt’s personal sloop out on Lake Superior several summers ago.

“I think I recall one of the first times you came to me,” Matthew said, leaving the warmth of the cup to rest on his chin. “You came to Newfoundland to fish for cod. All I really remember is feeling like something was in my shores, something I had never felt before. I don’t even think I ever even saw you, just the ship.”

Matthew always loved the low sound of Jan’s hum.

“Ah, yes. That was in 1620... I think I still have my journal from that voyage and detailed accounts of your coastline and the flora and fauna I observed during my short summer there.”

There was the slightest flutter of his heart at the idea of Johan finding his land beautiful even all those centuries ago, almost in the same way he had admired the man himself as a young ward to Lord Kirkland at an extravagant party nearly a hundred years ago.

To Johan, he was a nameless face and another asset to his father’s empire.

To Matthew, he was an endless daydream that took him far away from his studies for hours on end.

To be remembered and recalled, even upon first impressions being so plain and notwithstanding that the ballroom was packed with dozens of more attractive bedmates and beautiful faces.

Here they were together, watching the sun fighting tirelessly to break through the morning gloom.

“It’s strange being back here,” Matthew spoke up after taking another sip of his now lukewarm drink. "I feel like I should be listening for artillery and explosions.”

Another of Jan’s chest-deep hums that Matthew could feel travel up his own spine.

“It’s been thirty-five years since the war and eight years since we acquired the status of a conservation area here, but, you're here again to help rebuild all the same.”

"I think you just secretly love me for my craftsmanship. It's one of the only reasons father invites me over anyway. At the rate I'm going, I would rebuild his entire estate twice over."

"And my home thrice over."

Matthew shrugged, getting increasingly upset at how cold his drink was becoming but tolerated every sip of what Jan had prepared for him. "Proves my point," he all but muttered.

His head was turned gently, fine fingers taking his chin to turn and face the man that made his heart lurch so tenderly. "You know I love you for more than just how good you can upholster a chair or retile a roof right?"

He wanted to roll his eyes and just go back to leaning quietly against him, facing the window and not having to look at his stupidly handsome face.

"You're right, it's also because I know how to raise a barn and fix garden trellises."

"Why are you such a wijsneus first thing in the morning?"

"Because it's too early to even consider being awake and I haven't even finished one cup of hot coffee."

Silence rested between them and Matthew could hear the house creak when the wind blew in a little too harshly. He would have to find those points of weakness and replace what he could.

"You know," Jan said, running a hand up and down Matt's arm. "The hardware store doesn't open for a few hours. We can go back to bed if you're still tired."

"You wouldn't sleep though," Matthew argued. "You couldn't fall back asleep even if you wanted to."

"Then I'll sit up with you. I'm sure I have some paperwork I can go through or a book to read."

Matt muttered something under his breath and finished what remained of his cup. He rinsed his dish tepidly before taking hold of Jan's hand. He practically dragged him up the stairs and back to the bedroom, sighing in almost delight at the site of the bed being made and any stray clothes had been put away.

Forever reliable and dependable.

Matthew was back under the covers, the scent of yesterday's bliss still lingering on the sheets a clear image to his closed eyes.

Jan's breath was steady as he settled in next to him, sat up, and carefully thumbed through papers that had been waiting to be attended to.

Back into a routine of well-founded love, Matthew sighed and tried counting the times he felt Johan's hand run through his hair.

He only got to seven before the morning fog changed into an afternoon haze.

#hws canada #hws netherlands #hetalia #ace writes #nedcanweek2022 #nedcan #yeah i don't know either #i'll write something nicer for them someday #where the feature of matthew self loathing isn't the primary focus #how late am i on this again?

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beatbawksradio · 20 days

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vent about optimism

something else I've been trying to learn is also to outwardly appreciate the good things in my life, rather than just blasting negativity out all the time. bc life is honestly pretty good right now, its calm, i have loving and supportive friends and an amazing partner, and my finances are pretty stable. i think i realized it goes back to that thing i vented about before, about my accomplishments being undermined, and feeling like i can't celebrate anything without it making someone else feel bad or envious or angry.

but, is that any healthy way to live? is that something i should let myself worry about? should i continue to care about the miserable people who look for reasons to be miserable and bring someone else down to make themselves feel better? should i let it affect my ability to be outwardly positive, to talk about my fortune and accomplishments, and to just generally spread optimism in my public online spaces?

bc whats the alternative? if i don't share positive things, then im only blasting social media with art and my silly thought vomit when i get into those moods. im just being Negative, and that's not the kind of person i want to be. but how easy is it to be positive, to share your happiness when you, as a good person who cares too much about the people around you (and NOT around you), cant help but remember how this positivity you shared before had such a deeply negative impact on the miserable you used to be surrounded by? when someone takes someone else's happiness and gets angry or envious over it, is that really your fault? is it healthy to let yourself give in to their will, and stifle your own happiness for the sake of making a miserable person, not happy, but just a little bit less miserable? ...how does that work when the only thing that makes them less miserable is the very opportunity of being able to knock you down and put themselves higher? should this behavior be encouraged? enabled? ignored but still fed into?

i dont have all the answers. im just one guy. but i know myself, most of all, and i know what it takes to be decent and live a happy life. part of that is learning how to accept people for who they are, and let go. i can give advice and show miserable people what it takes to be less miserable all day long, but its not gonna amount to anything if they're not willing to listen, not willing to learn, and most of all, not willing to be an active participant in that change. you can't change people. they can only change themselves. and if someone is perfectly content remaining a miserable pile of selfishness and envy that seeks to use you as their personal emotional punching bag, there's nothing i can do change that.

the only thing i can do, is figure out how I'm going to deal with it. how I'll respond to it. and i choose to not let it stop me from living my best life. i choose to continue being myself and being as positive and optimistic as I'm able to be, because i, personally, want my impact on this world to be as positive as i can muster. there will always be shadows and conflicts, and that's okay, and i don't need to let them rule me or my decision making. there's nothing wrong with me. there's nothing bad or cruel about being a positive minded person. my positivity doesn't torture others, the only ones torturing them are themselves

#vent #vibevibe #sessionvibe

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zealsoughtsequesterustanxiedemon · 6 months

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On last RB

reminds me of the cis male version of that. Brain used to get so weird about trans fans of those characters that would claim that they were trans.

Was very stuck in the mindset of like "Okay they aren't definitionally transgender" (whatever that means). Most people saying it probably mean they're more, like, thematically transgender or just very relatable to trans people. Or they're just unaware of how cis people could relate to it. I've actually seen my fair share of comments from trans women on GB/CD manga going, "I don't know understand what cis people get out of this". They make me laugh.

Regardless I'm not very bothered by it nowadays unless it's accompanied by complaints about people gendering the character as male. Or just shitting on the author for "not understanding that trans people exist." The latter def still annoys me, like this character couldn't be an honest exploration of gender or that the author actually wanted to make a trans character and got told no by publishers. But my brains better now about just muting/blocking and moving on.

Cause I do understand the frustration. There's not a lot of trans characters out there in anime/manga, at least not in the mainstream. These are characters they really relate to and see themselves in. I at least feel being disappointed when a character you thought was trans has the story opt out of making them trans. I've definitely had those with gender bending stories before, even had one that did the opt-out right at the end and left me crying and angry and feeling like shit. I get wanting to see your gender identity reflected there. And for them talking about it they basically get harassed. Even if they can still be an asshole about it sometimes, it's such a minor issue to me now. Again, if it really bothers me, I can always mute/block and move on.

Really we should have plenty of trans and cis gnc characters to pick from. Personally speaking, I definitely need the latter and want more of the former that I don't just see as the latter. Cis people, at least a decent portion of us are always gonna need cis characters that fly in the face of gender norms. It's always weird when people call that kind of behavior "not very cis", when like, to some of us it's kinda intrinsic to being cis. Struggling with gender was actually always a cis experience thing to me; like, not a struggle about which gender you are but like how good at gender you are. Feeling like less or like more of a man. I saw that type of insecurity everywhere growing up, not all equivalent, but definitely there in some amount. Seeing this kind of exaggeratedly "feminine" traits being carried by a man who's often very secure in his masculinity feels so freeing. Even when those characters are insecure, I can see someone who feels a lot like me. It validates my "feminine" interests, lets me feel okay to want to be cuter, wear different clothes, etc.

Its nice seeing that trans people, especially my friends, love these characters too. I love that there's people like me out there, connecting to the same characters, even if we're just a little different (or a lot different). I think part of my original insecurity with these characters being called trans was, like, I figured these were people who'd understand exactly how I'd feel about these characters, but instead, from my understanding at the time, they were denying me. Saying that I shouldn't relate to that character or that if I did I'm probably not what I think I am. The cis side of the conversation is often v surface level ("He's just a guy who likes cute things" or pointing at snapshot-able gender confirmations). So glad I've got plenty of trans friends now who make me feel cool about this stuff and can talk more substantively on characters like this. I love em and wouldn't trade em for any amount of transphobic assholes that'd call these characters men purely because of their AGAB. ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

#Anx-I-E-Demons #also looong post #don't know why my brain needs to write so many words tonight

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itsdetachable · 10 months

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food talk below the cut, referencing low carb and managing a diet etc behind read more

since many family members develop Type 2 diabetes as they age I've decided to make dietary changes to hopefully hold it off a bit longer. Right now my A1c is RIGHT on the cusp between Normal and Pre-Diabetes (how...not cool) so uh beyond time to start working on this. I'm trying to monitor my carbs + sugars and recently have started adjusting my diet to have less carbs in it. So far it's going good but its been two days lol. Main difference is less obvious carbs, like breads/rice/etc and less pure sugar (in tea and coffee), and more fruits, meat protein, nuts. Shockingly! The past two days I worked in the office and the food I packed for breakfast and lunch and some snacks kept me full until I got home, usually I'm STARVING when I get home. So that was a win.

I'm planning to get low carb tortillas for wraps and as bread-substitutes in some food ideas I have. Also I have been having the BEST time making my own lunchables with these mini double smoked sausages, some cheese, and these whole grain? or whatever? crackers + yogurt dessert. Also I realized I love Pluots SO MUCH I need to find where I can buy more of them because I need fruits I actually enjoy eating to fill out my diet.

Also limiting the amount of sugar I use in tea/coffee and the amount of tea and coffee in general I'm drinking and replacing it with lightly flavored water I think is helping as well.

Either way, after two days my Blood Glucose is consistently 10 points below where I was before I started the new diet (when testing at the same times, Morning before eating and late afternoon 2 hours after last time I ate something) which I think is a good change. If I can manage to keep this up for 85% of the time I think I'll be okay?

It IS involving getting some prepackaged portions (mainly of cheese) to make life easier on myself. I'm also trying to learn more about complex carbs vs simple carbs. Whole Wheat breads have complex carbs, so apparently even if they have a similar amount of carbs to white bread it's better for you? (Pumpernickel's glycemic index is only a 6 which is really good, that's the bread my mom eats and it has made a big change tbh to her blood sugar levels).

So I'm going to make a visit to my doc for a comprehensive blood test in about a month and try to keep this diet going until then and see what the tests show, and make tweaks if I need to.

(tbh I'm excited because I found a way to have Chipotle burrito bowls that are low carb and decent on the fat so when I do wanna get a 'special' lunch I can spring for something I really like but will still be low carb without being a straight up salad lol) (i think I figured out how to make pulled pork wraps with low carb tortillas feasible, i just want to think of a side that's veggie. Coleslaw? But that comes with other things like fats and the sugars/carbs from bbq sauce hmmm... i'll figure it out. I still wanna eat food that tastes good lol)

So basically - less cheap carbs in the sense of white breads and simple carbs, more protein (lean meats, yogurt), more nuts, more veggies and fruits, less added sugar in teas/coffess, less tea/coffee in general, more water. I think I'll be okay just hope this doesn't like rock the boat with cholesterol (though that's always been good fingers crossed) and I dunno salt content in regards to blood pressure? Although less coffee and tea overall might help with that too. We'll see

OKAY END OF RAMBLING GOOD NIGHT

#food #diet #low carb diet

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pomrania · 10 months

Text

Looking over last year's Smaugust stuff in preparation for this year's Smaugust -- I don't want to have to rediscover all those tricks from scratch -- and damn there's some REALLY good stuff in there. Good job, past me.

Currently working on writing the text for at least the first request post, decent chance it'll get changed up for future posts as I think of things to add or remove. At least this time around, I have a "for more information click here" post I can link, instead of having a wall of text to scroll through before people can see critters and art.

So yeah Smaugust is starting tomorrow, and I'll want to draw some (read: a lot of) cats as dragons. If you have cat pictures, get them handy.

I remember that last year I was really drained by it, so I think this year I'll work on limiting the amount of time I spend on any one picture; ideally this will help me develop some artistic efficiency, but "not feeling tired all of the time" is its own benefit.

DO NOT REFRAIN FROM MAKING REQUESTS BECAUSE YOU DON'T WANT TO OVERWORK ME; TIME AND ENERGY MANAGEMENT IS A PROBLEM TO BE SOLVED ON *MY* END. If I end up needing to close stuff for a bit, I'm perfectly capable of deciding that myself; have some respect for me as an autonomous person. I've already set things up to prevent certain ballooning; "separate posts for each day" means that it can't go too far if it breaches containment, and also that if I end up needing a day off, I can just... not make a post for that day.

(In completely unrelated news, I just found a comb I'd been looking for, for a few days; it was behind the container it's supposed to be in, but I know for a FACT that I'd taken that container out, looked in that area, and hadn't seen it. *shrug* Gremlins.)

Gah, every time I prepare for an art event, I keep coming back to that rant, of people not making requests, WHEN I EXPLICITLY SAY "PLEASE GIVE ME REQUESTS", because they "don't want to be a bother". First of all, that's some nasty scarring on your soul, that you think that way; I know "don't think that way" can't make you heal, but at least it doesn't let the lie continue that you're SUPPOSED to be mentally limping around. Second of all, my own damage resulted in the exact opposite problems; so if I ever hit a lull with this, there's a decent chance I'll be bothering people "hey give me a photo of your cat to draw".

Back to looking at the stuff I'd drawn last year. I'm pretty sure THAT prompt list is better than the one I'll be using, which I'd made in like half an hour, MAYBE an hour; so there's a bunch of cool concepts I won't get from my list, so I'll have to be aware and try to work cool stuff into it anyways.

Huh, I hadn't remembered I'd drawn so many pictures in greyscale. Well not MANY of them, but still more than I'd thought. That's what I did when I didn't have the energy for working with colours, or I simply couldn't think of what colour scheme would be best; and they all looked good regardless. (Okay there's one I don't care too much for, but it was from early on in the event, where I hadn't fully figured out the best way of dragonification, and it doesn't look any worse than pictures done in colour from that same timeframe.) Need to keep in mind an that's an option.

Also, I really like a lot of the pictures I'd done where there isn't really any shading, just lines and colours. Something else to keep in mind, that it's not a NECESSARY step. Might or might not want to try working on that specifically, because when I see a picture (that someone else has done) in that style, done with skill, I personally enjoy it more than one done in a different style with equal skill.

Also seeing a number of pictures where it's EXTREMELY obvious I just had a dumb thought that made me grin and then I ran with it; and you know what, those pictures STILL make me grin.

#no fandom #not a reblog #personal

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our-reality · 1 year

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give me a rundown on your silly guys when you feel up 2 it ?

omg yaur ofc .... i've already talked about their personalities in the past (which i can link you to if you want me to!!) so this time i'll expand a bit on their actual roles/tropes in the story and how they factor into the theme :)

ruby - the main character, along with java. originally she was solely the main character, but as time went on and the more i developed the two's relationship the more obvious it became that they should be co-leads. anyways ruby plays into the "sunshine" character trope very heavily and she's easily the most cheerful and optimistic out of all the 7 main characters.

however, she represents overarching theme of the story that "you can't get better on your own, you have to let others help you" in a way unique to her. long story short, she was the one who needed to get better in her youth, but because she had so many different support systems in her life, she was able to then extend the kindness she received to others, being the primary person to do so throughout the entire story. imo she probably embodies the theme the best, which is good cuz she's my favorite xoxo

java - like i said, co-lead to ruby and foil in a lot of ways, often opposing ruby's willingness to stick her head out for others by being more cautious and apprehensive. definitely follows the "brooding" archetype (making her and ruby's relationship a brooding x sunshine kinda deal).

what's interesting about java with the theme, though, is that while she's older than ruby, she's still heavily on the road to recovery from her teenage years. she sort of represents the journey there, not being fully healed to the same extent ruby is (though ruby is FAR from being healed herself), but is absolutely on her way to being there (see: how she treats requiem in comparison to swift treats them. ough. but i'll get to that later)

ALSO SMTH THAT I JUST THOUGHT OF java has the most amount of connections between the seven main characters while ruby most strongly embodies the central theme which makes both og them the heart of the story in different ways that's neat........

python - oh good lord okay. uhm. it's a sort of mentor figure to the two main characters but he's definitely on the reluctant side. uh it for suresies plays into the whole antihero trope with how he looks and behaves, and he also has by far the most connection to the main villain so there's something. uhm but hey in terms of the theme.

the consistent motif throughout his life is like. needing help but not having anyone around to help him with. it was definitely the worst when it was a god (looked down upon by the other gods and largely lived in swift's shadow), and it didn't really get much better when he became human, which was why it felt so betrayed by vysel that it killed him :)!!! on that note though i think after that moment he stops sort of "playing by the rules", accepting all of the constant rejection it's received, and resorting to violence more often because, from its perspective, it's the only thing that's worked so far.

it embodies an end of the spectrum of what happens if you don't/can't let others help you heal, and he spends a lot of season 1 climbing out of the habits it fell into after vysel's death. he does get better though dw

swift - also a mentor to the main characters like python is, but unlike python who can manage being a decent mentor (all things considered) and a good friend, sky's a soaring mentor but not the greatest person to be around. they have a lot of that "all work no play" kind of energy and doesn't really understand the concept of breaks because she never gets one haha what.

aside from that yk that spectrum of what happens when you don't let others help you heal i mentioned with python. she's equal but the polar opposite. sky had piles of people to help them after python's dissappearance but sky shut all of them out because none of them were what she "wanted". in skies mind, python was the only person who could make things better and they refused to think otherwise. which to her credit the other gods are kinda assholes so it's not an incorrect assumption but shshsh. so they isolated herself, selling skies soul to their work and the prophecy (aka the narrative), because in their perception it would only make it harder if she had to juggle the two hardest jobs in the universe AND be other peoples' friends because, other than python, she only saw friends as boxes to check, as just more people they had to hold up appearances to.

they get better too thankfully but essentially python was wrecked by having no one to help and used their overwhelming passion to hurt both himself and others, while swift was wrecked and tried to get rid of skies passions altogether so that she wouldn't be able to hurt themself or others. funny how that works huh

shocker! no. once the second half kicks off it's like. abundantly obvious that there's a lot more to his character than what he first shows. he actually has a lot of different combined traits from the other characters (mentioned the growing up too fast thing already, but there's also there's a parallel to python with the delving into a "false" persona thing, and a parallel to swift with the selling his soul to work thing), which i swear wasn't me being lazy it's just how it worked out

c+ - uh. the comic relief LMAO. for the first half of season 1 he serves as a comedic foil to java and to round out the "humans who had to grow up too fast" trio (with ruby and java). basically his character in the first half is meant to disarm you, like at least there's one character that doesn't have a despressing underside to him right? right???

i wrote out some other stuff regarding his character a lil bit ago which i can also link you too but yeah!! my funny guy :)

vysel - the villain. that's it we're done here BWJSKDKSJFKLS no but fr i hesitate to call him an antagonist because that sort of implies he's a direct opposition to the protagonist and he really?? isn't??? well. okay it's complicated. he has a very direct connection to python but other than that. he himself has no connection to swift but the spirits absolutely do so that kinda works but he doesn't know ruby or java pretty much at all. yeah he's one of java's favorite artists but that's kind of a one sided thing. but PLOT TWIST THAT WAS INTENTIONAL THE WHOLE TIME!!!!!!!!!!!

in a bunch of like. esp old "chosen one" stories the villains often don't have super strong connections to the chosen hero, which isn't especially an issue in most cases. but the reason i bring this up is because, in addition to the main theme, vysel's also a major prop for the theme of the narrative. cuz well. he kind of is just a prop, isn't he? like yeah he personally wronged python and he develops beef with the other main cast as time goes on, but he's not the first or last to harm python AND they couldve just as easily formed beef with a different person. if it wasn't him brought back and it was someone else? it wouldn't make that big a difference to the main characters, or anyone, really. he's assimilated into the narrative from the start, and that fact only becomes more and more apparent to the audience (and eventually him as well) as the story goes on. and i could say even more but that would be off topic n his section is long as hell already lmao

uh anyways i'm gonna keep the rest brief but in terms of the main theme he respresents like. yes you have to let others help you but sometimes others can be toxic and you have to be able to recognize when people's help and love for you is conditional. and this is pretty much restricted to python but if i talk about vysel anymore i'll lose my mind sorry

requiem - FINALLY REQUIEM and they were supposed to be the main character as they're the literal chosen one before they forced themself out of the narrative (but not really because you can never truly escape your fate lol). basically the "refusal of the call" stage of the hero's journey taken to the extreme. anyways yk that whole black and white motif they have. yeah that's no coincidence that's just like. visual language. every inch of their existence is connected to their chosen one status . its fun

and this is something i've never extensively talked about ever so NEW LORE!! their parents neglect the fuck out of them. FUN RIGHT thorne write a character with two loving and living parents challenge (impossible). but uh yeah yk those jokes that're like "wow how are all the parents of these heros just fine to let their child walk around all by themselves with no supervision". yeah that. their parents aren't physically or emotionally abusive in any way and they do care about requiem to an extent but they also are. not good at being parents. so when requiem ends up running away from home with the gang they. don't care for a while. oops.

and reqs not a paticularly good or bad student either so they're really not used to an adult giving them attention, let alone 4 at the exact same time so yeah when the gang shows up on their doorstep and say "hey do you want to go on a trip around the entire world with us" the adjustment period ends up being pretty rough for them ! but when they do finally start to open up it's very obvious that they need so much help . in terms of the theme yk how i said python and swift were different ends of the "what happens when no one helps you" spectrum? well requiem isn't quite on their level but they're well on their way to being just as bad as them, if not worse. so the other four kind of have to work at them and unearth all of the things they've repressed, basically trying to stop them from spiraling into the same unhealthy coping mechanisms that python and swift and especially java (who i haven't mentioned in relation to reqs until now but they are Extremely similar characters. reqs is like a younger java brought forward in time except somehow even more emo). and yeah that's how they relate to the theme heehee

i hope you realize why i can't go on long winded rants about their characters cuz there is even more to be said about them beyond all of this . i was trying to be brief when writing these . uh anyways if you want me to elaborate on these more i will but HOUH

#ruby #java #python #swift #c+#vysel #requiem #hope this was worth the wait heehee

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uvobreakmylegs · 3 years

Text

Detour

I’m excited that it’s fall but i’m also sad that i won’t be able to swim anymore

Warnings: death, graphic depictions of violence, creepy behavior, groping, mentions of smut, kidnapping

The two guys at the gas station check out counter had been there when Phinks had first walked through the sliding glass doors, and they were still there when he approached the check out himself, having only dropped in to grab another pack of beer. The gas station clerk seemed annoyed while the two guys were pulling their pockets inside out, evidently in search of any spare change that may have been hiding on their persons. There was a sad pile of jenny and some change sitting in front of the clerk while she waited for them impatiently, and she seemed ready to push all of the money back towards them as it became more and more likely that these two didn't have enough cash for the assortment of alcohol and junk food that also sat on the counter.

Any other time Phinks would've been annoyed by the situation. But seeing as he didn't have anywhere to be, he found that he didn't really care all that much. The troupe likely wouldn't meet back up for some time which left his schedule quite open, and he had found it difficult to find something to occupy his time with while he waited for the boss to bring everyone together again.

Phinks had decided that a road trip was a decent way to pass the time. It was something he'd never really done before and so far it was easing his boredom as he had hoped it would. There was no real time limit he had set on himself or any destination that he had in mind. He'd just keep doing whatever he felt like until the novelty of the trip wore off and then go home.

“Would you like to take a few items off?”

The tired voice of the clerk cut through his thoughts, and Phinks found that there had been no progress with the two in front of him.

“No no, we need all of it,” one of the men, a redhead, insisted, “we just, uh....”

Trailing off, the man glanced over to Phinks, who was still waiting with his single pack of beer. Then the man looked over to his companion and then back to the items on the counter.

Phinks could already sense what the man was going to ask of him before he spoke out.

“Hey man,” the guy said to Phinks, “I know it sounds bad, but do you think you could spot me on this? I'm bringing this stuff back for my party. We ran out of some stuff way quicker than we expected. Can't let people down, y'know?”

The redhead started telling him how much more they needed until the clerk interrupted him to tell him off for harassing other customers for money. A mini argument started between the two, with the man insisting that he wasn't harassing anyone and the clerk disagreeing with him. The man's friend joined in shortly after and it was quickly turning into a mess.

What obnoxious fucking people.

If he was in more of a bad mood he'd have probably snapped the necks of all of them. The presence of cameras stopped him from doing that, however, as it would just be too much of a pain to go to the back and destroy the footage after. Still, even though he didn't have anywhere to be, it didn't mean that he wanted to waste his time listening to people bicker. The easiest way out of this was to just give them the jenny so they'd all shut up.

After pulling out his wallet, Phinks slid the jenny across the counter.

That shut the three of them up, and the two men were quick to express their gratitude while the clerk just looked tired.

“Thank you so, so much, man,” the redhead continued after they collected their bagged items.

“Mm-hm.”

Phinks was only half-paying attention to him as he waited for the clerk to scan the beer so he could hand her the jenny owed. That transaction went much quicker and Phinks was soon making his way to the exit.

The two men seemed to be waiting on him, though.

“Hey, since you helped us out, you wanna come to my party?” the redhead asked.

Normally his automatic response would've been to give him a flat “no”. But in this instance Phinks just shrugged.

That seemed to give the redhead hope, and he began listing the reasons why Phinks should follow them back, like his “cool house”, hot women and great beer.

Given the especially cheap brand of beer Phinks had largely paid for, he had a hard time believing that last point. He also wasn't quite sure why this guy was so insistent on getting him to come along. Was it really just because Phinks had bothered to help them out?

“Name's Stu by the way. Back there is Billy,” the redhead told him, sticking out his arm to shake hands. When Phinks didn't do the same, Stu seemed a bit dejected, yet even that didn't make him back down from inviting Phinks.

“So how 'bout it, man? You wanna come?”

“.... I'll think about it,” he told him.

“Okay, but do it fast man. My place isn't that far from here.”

Phinks nodded, and Stu ran off to the car where his friend was waiting. The other guy didn't seem as keen on Phinks as the redhead had, regarding the blonde with suspicion. Phinks could hear him saying something as the two entered the car. Stu seemed to brush him off, and then their car doors closed and Phinks couldn't hear anything else.

The two ended up pulling out of the parking lot before he did, and Phinks found himself following them as they all made the same turn onto the highway.

He still had no real urge to go to some random guy's party, especially when he found him to be pretty annoying. And if it was a party filled with the friends of someone like that, he'd probably get irritated with all of them pretty quick. Better to just ignore them and be on his way.

Although the thought of just driving aimlessly through the night wasn't all that attractive, either. He'd done that several times now, and the feeling of being the only person in the world while he drove on the empty highway had lost its touch by now.

The car in front of him veered off the highway to get onto a side road.

After a few seconds, Phinks did the same, just thinking to himself 'why not?'. It would be something different, a little detour on a trip that was meant to be a distraction, and if it ended up being something that he didn't want to bother with, then he could just leave.

Although the noise level in the house wasn't quiet, it was nowhere near ear-shatteringly loud as Phinks may have expected. At least it had that in it's favor. Other than that, it was a stereotypical frat house party, with everyone talking and drinking as they got more and more shitfaced.

The two who brought him here vanished into the kitchen, and Phinks began to make his way around the house, sipping one of the cans of beer he had bought for himself since he had no interest in the shit the host had him pay for. A girl in one of the upstairs rooms noticed the beer in his hand and begged him to share with her, even going as far as to tug on the sleeve of his jacket when he told her no. He ended up pushing her away, and though he had tried to use as little force as possible, his strength combined with her tipsiness caused her to stumble back into a wall. She was still whining about him when he walked back down the stairs, going on about how mean he was.

He thought he'd been pretty nice to her, all things considered.

It didn't take long for Phinks to lose interest in this particular distraction. Not that he'd been expecting much, but after going around the house and not even seeing anything that might be worth stealing, he figured it'd be best to leave soon. With his short temper being one of his vices, he didn't want to deal with what would happen if some drunk got on his nerves and he smashed them into the wall.

With the sights, sounds and smells became grating to him and seeing no reason to stay any longer, Phinks went about trying to find an exit. Attempting to get out the same way he came in was put to a stop when he saw how congested the front entrance had become. He could've easily pushed past all of them, but since that would likely draw a fair amount of attention, maybe it'd be a better idea to find a different way out. Phinks wandered into the kitchen, walking by Stu who tried to talk to him. A patio door leading to the backyard caught his eye and he ignored the party's host as he walked by several people to get to it.

The cool air outside felt refreshing and he let out a soft sigh as the patio door slowly swung closed. Claustrophobia generally wasn't something he had an issue with, but that seemed to change a little when he was faced with a house full of drunken strangers who didn't understand the meaning of personal space. Another nice thing was the fact that no one else seemed to be out here. He didn't think it was that cold out, but it worked just fine if the people inside thought otherwise.

He stood on a deck with an assortment of patio furniture that sat in front of an in ground pool, and when he looked to the side, he saw the gate within the fencing that surrounded the backyard.

That was his way out, then.

With no more reason to stick around, he was about to head out and back to his car-

But he paused when he heard the sound of splashing water, and he looked back to the pool.

So he wasn't the only person out here.

Some of the patio furniture had blocked you from his sight so he hadn't noticed you at first, but you were now swimming out into the center of the pool and impossible to miss. It was pretty late in the year for swimming, wasn't it? Yet you seemed to be content with yourself despite the temperature and lack of company, swimming around the pool like you owned it. Maybe you did; he wasn't sure what your relation was to the party host.

Then your eyes met, and you smiled as you greeted him.

“Hello.”

“... Hey.”

He hadn't come out to look for company. He was looking to leave.

Yet something about this situation, about you, intrigued him, and Phinks walked forward, continuing with “isn't it a little late in the season for swimming?”

“That's what everyone seems to think,” you said, “it's going to be drained tomorrow, so I wanted to swim one more time before that. It's the last chance I'll get for this year.”

“No public pools around here?” he asked.

“I don't really like public pools,” you told him, laughing a little bit as you continued “the ones around here are never clean, and I don't wanna swim around in nasty water.”

Phinks couldn't say if he really had an opinion one way or the other. He tried to avoid situations where he'd need to be shirtless in public, as the spider with the number 5 on his ribs would've been a dead giveaway for anyone who understood it's meaning. He just shrugged at you as he said “fair enough.”

Phinks now stood at the edge of the pool while you swam up to the edge.

“I don't think I've seen you before. You new around here?” you asked him.

“No. Just passing through. Helped out the host at the gas station and he invited me as thanks,” Phinks explained, “I was expecting this to be taking place at some shitty apartment; didn't think a guy like that owned a house.”

“He doesn't, it belongs to his older brother Jed. Stu just lives with him,” you responded.

“Ah.”

That made a bit more sense to him. Since he hadn't been able to buy beer from a gas station on his own, it didn't seem likely that the guy would've had his own house. So he was just leeching off of his brother.

Despite being ready to leave just minutes earlier, he found that he now had a reason to want to stay here longer. But standing and talking to you was getting a little awkward, so Phinks sat himself down on the concrete next to the pool. So far you weren't annoying compared to some of the others. And despite being by yourself beforehand, you seemed pretty open to talking with him, resting your arms on the edge of the pool.

“You friends with them, then?”

“Jed is in a few of my classes, so I'm friends with him. Not Stu, though. He's kind of an asshole. Likes to play a lot of stupid pranks.”

You rested your chin in your hand as you thought back.

“He's destroyed two of my phones so far, both times by dumping water on me,” you said, “although I guess he did repay me for both, but it's still such a hassle to go through.”

“You're nicer than I am. If some guy like that fucked up my phone I'd kill him.”

You laughed at him, not taking his words seriously.

“You seem nice enough. You helped him out, right?”

“Only because it was the fastest way to get outta there. Stupid bastard started an argument with the clerk.”

“Yeah. That sounds like something he'd do,” you said, tiredness lacing your voice.

A cheer then sounded from inside the house, and though the doors and windows were closed, it was loud enough that the both of you could hear it from outside.

“Things must be ramping up in there,” you commented.

“Guess so,” Phinks said, taking a swig of his drink after.

“Isn't it kinda weird that you're keeping to yourself with an event like this? Don't see the point in going out if you're going to avoid people,” he added.

“But isn't that what you're doing by coming out here?” you asked.

“Nah, I was getting ready to leave.”

“What stopped you?”

“I haven't done much out here beside sitting here talking to you. What do you think?”

You seemed a bit taken aback and a little embarrassed as you realized the reason, but gave him a small smile.

“Oh wow. Are you saying I managed to be charming enough to keep a guy from leaving?” you asked him.

“No. You're just not as annoying as the others I've met tonight.”

Your expression was rather blank as you took in that information.

“..... I'll take that as a compliment, then,” you said, “so what do you do?”

“What do I do?”

“For a job, or just anything in general.”

“I do a couple odd jobs here and there, I guess,” he answered, “every once in a while a bigger opportunity comes up, and I just do whatever I need to.”

It was an oversimplification of his criminal activities, and he hoped that he'd been vague enough without sounding suspicious.

It appeared that he had as you didn't seem to think it was strange.

“You mentioned earlier that you were just passing through. Are you on your way to a job or something?”

“Nah. I'm currently off-duty. And I had a lot of time to kill, so I decided to take a road trip.”

“Oh, that sounds nice,” you said, “I work on campus, so I don't really get to do vacations for now. Can't remember the last time I went on one.”

“Job at least worth it?”

“Kind of? Although the other week I needed to go through something stupid.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I got screamed at by a lady.”

Your tone made it seem like that was something happened on a regular basis.

“For what?” he asked.

“Something with her daughter's textbooks. She ordered one that she didn't need on accident but didn't want to admit that she made a mistake, so she just let her mother yell at me for forty minutes and claim that we were the ones who fucked up.”

You sighed a little after the explanation. Evidently that situation still made you frustrated.

“.... Did she apologize after?” Phinks asked.

With a slightly wistful smile, you shook your head as you said “people like that don't apologize.”

“Sounds rough.”

It went without saying that Phinks wouldn't have tolerated anything like that. If it had been him he'd have killed them both and tossed their bodies in the trash. But he kept that rather violent thought to himself.

“Sorry you needed to deal with that,” he added.

“It's okay. It's little things that keep you going,” you said, “I've been looking forward to swimming for a while, so I'm pretty happy right now. Although I guess I'm kinda doing a job right now.”

“How so?”

“Jed's at his job right now, and since he doesn't trust Stu, he asked me to make sure nothing happens to the pool. The last time Stu had a party there was a bunch of trash in it the next morning, and it was a pain to clean up. So in exchange for using the pool, I have full permission to snitch on anyone who tosses anything.”

“Yeah? What's snitching gonna do?”

“Jed's a scary guy. Nobody wants to make him mad.”

If Phinks had felt like being more of an asshole, and if you'd been unpleasant during your conversation with him, he probably would've taken his half-finished beer can and thrown it into the pool just to upset you and also to see if your friend was as scary as you were making him out to be.

But so far he'd been enjoying himself, so as fun as that thought might have been, he decided against it.

You pulled one of your arms off of the rim and back into the water. Evidently you were getting cold, but you held on to the edge to continue speaking to him.

“So how long have you been on your trip?” you asked.

“A few weeks.”

“A few weeks? You must have been all over the place, then. Did you go anywhere in particular?”

“Not really,” Phinks answered, “didn't have any real plan when I set out. Just drove to wherever I thought would be interesting.”

“That's kinda cool,” you said, “must be nice to be able to go wherever you want without any real plan.”

“You can't?”

“Nope. Classes and work means I can't just run off whenever I feel like it.”

“Too busy getting screamed at?” he asked jokingly.

“Yeah, something like that,” you answered, laughing a little after.

You pulled your other arm back underwater and just kept a hand on the side of the wall.

“Cold?” he asked.

“A little.”

“Probably why most people aren't swimming this late.”

“I don't care; it's worth it,” you said, “honestly, the thought of being able to swim was what kept me going this week.”

That.... Was a little bit sad, Phinks thought to himself. That all you had to look forward to at the end of the week was a few hours to swim by yourself in the cold. There were much sadder circumstances in the world – he was certain that anyone from Meteor City would be more than happy to switch places with you – but your life must have felt empty. Although Phinks was technically in the same boat at the moment, at least being with the troupe gave him purpose. What did you have besides a shitty job and presumably a fair amount of college debt? Just the 'little things' to keep you going?

Maybe he was presuming too much; he'd only just met you after all. But it bothered him regardless.

“What are your plans for after college?” he asked.

You seemed a bit startled, and you looked away from him for the first time.

“Not really sure, actually. I'm still undecided on my major,” you admitted, “I need to figure out soon, though. I'm going to run out of the basic coursework that I need to get through, and my family is getting mad that I haven't made a decision yet.”

So you didn't have any direction and were being pressured by others. Still not the saddest circumstance ever, but if it had been him, Phinks was certain he'd have been miserable.

You clearly didn't want to keep going on about that particular subject, as you began to ask him questions about his trip, wanting to know where exactly he had been so far and how much longer he planned to drive for. The change in topics was obvious, but he decided to go along with it.

As the night grew darker while the two of you talked, he decided that he liked you. You could hold a decent conversation, even if the things you two talked about weren't all that meaningful.

You were pretty cute, too.

The party behind him still seemed to be going strong, but it was largely going ignored by you both, in part by the fact that you were still the only ones outside.

Your face lit up as a thought came to mind.

“You should come in!” you told him.

“No thanks.”

“Come on! It's really nice!”

You grabbed at his free hand, tugging on his arm lightly as you tried to encourage him to get into the pool.

“If you get my suit wet I'll drown you,” Phinks said told you.

You giggled, once more not taking him seriously. Though he was only half-serious about it at this point.

“Then take it off and come in,” you insisted.

“I don't have a swimsuit.”

“That doesn't stop most people.

“Good to know,” he said flatly.

Though you'd stopped tugging on his arm, both of your hands remained on his wrist as you looked up at him.

“Can you not swim?” you asked.

“I can swim fine,” he said, “I just don't feel like it right now.”

You seemed a bit disappointed, but you had yet to let go of his wrist.

“Should you really be that surprised with the temperature being what it is?” he asked you.

“It isn't that bad. And the pool is heated,” you insisted, “didn't think a bit of chill would scare off the most interesting person at this party, though.”

The corner of his lips curled a bit at that. He wasn't one for meaningless flattery, but he didn't mind hearing you say things like that.

“Is that why you're not letting go of me?”

“You don't seem to be doing much to shake me off.”

“I could if I wanted to.”

“So you don't want to?”

You were teasing him. And while he could tease you back, he went for a different approach.

He yanked his wrist out of your grip and grabbed your own wrist just as fast, and lifted you up until you were eye level with him. To say you were flustered by the action would've been an understatement, and your free hand grasped at the arm that held you up to lessen the weight on the arm that he had trapped.

With you partially out of the water, Phinks allowed his eyes to travel over your form, following the trails of water that dripped down your skin and imagining exactly what you looked like under that swimsuit. His grin got wider when he saw your body reacting to the cooler temperature and the way your nipples showed through the material. It hadn't been on his mind when he first approached you, but after spending time with you he found himself liking the idea of fooling around with you. Probably not in the house, and he doubted you would want to do anything in the pool due to that friend of yours you had mentioned. Maybe there was some dark corner around here where he could take you to do what he wanted.

You were squirming a little, trying to free yourself from his grip.

“It's cold,” you whined.

“Yep,” was his reply.

“Come on, let go. I'm only in a swimsuit.”

“You weren't letting me go,” he pointed out.

“Yeah, but I didn't pull you into the water.”

“Because you're too weak to do that.”

“That's not fair!”

“Don't think this is a situation where fairness matters, sweetheart.”

With that he let you go, and you dropped back down into the pool. You pushed away from the wall after, giving him a slightly sour look.

“Problem?” he asked.

“It's cold,” you repeated.

He just smirked.

“You're gonna need to deal with it at some point,” he told you.

“Yeah, but I wasn't ready for it then!”

You had to have noticed the way he looked at you, right? There was no way you were so oblivious to have not seen how he had blatantly looked you over. Yet you weren't mentioning it.

By now you were more at the center of the pool, pointedly out of his range.

“You done talking?” Phinks asked.

“No, but I don't want you pulling me out again.”

Then you looked away like you were embarrassed.

It clicked for him. You must have liked it, but you were too shy to say anything about it.

Your reluctance was cute, though Phinks knew he'd get tired of that game pretty fast.

“Come back over,” he told you.

“Why?”

“Because I want you to.”

You shook your head.

“You're going to do that again, right?” you asked.

“Maybe.”

“Then no. I don't wanna get out yet.”

“How long are you gonna stay in there?”

“Until I feel like getting out.”

“And if I want you out of there now?”

“Then you'd have to come in and get me.”

…. Oh

That's what it was.

A ploy by you to get him into the pool.

That's what you had to mean by those words, right?

“.... What the hell,” he said to himself as he stood.

It got your attention when he began to remove his clothing, throwing them over to a few neatly folded articles of clothing that sat next to a bag on the patio, which he assumed belonged to you. You were watching him closely, and he could sense a growing interest in you when he removed his shirt. Your eyes lingered a little when you caught sight of his spider tattoo, but there was no hint that you recognized what it meant, which was preferable.

“Enjoying the show?” he asked.

“You were looking at me earlier,” you answered defensively, “you're not allowed to get mad when I do the same.”

“Didn't say I was mad.”

You acknowledging the way he had looked at you then just reaffirmed in his head that you hadn't minded, and after stripping down to his boxers, Phinks jumped in. The water felt just as nice as you had said, but he didn't take much time to focus on it as he was quick to approach you. Within moments, he had wrapped his arms around you and pulled you in close, lifting you a little so you were at eye level with him. You seemed flustered again, but you didn't make any move to get away, and were resting your hands on his chest.

“I don't think you told me your name,” you whispered to him.

“Phinks.”

“Phinks,” you repeated, smiling afterwards, “I like it. It's cool.”

“Thanks,” he replied, “and how 'bout you?”

You gave him your name, which he also repeated to himself.

“Not as cool as 'Phinks', I guess,” you said.

“It suits you,” he said.

You smiled at him, then shifted slightly in his grip.

“Are you just gonna keep holding me?”

“You said I needed to come in and get you.”

“And what did you want to 'get' me for?”

Despite the question, you clearly had an idea of what Phinks was after as you began to move in closer to him. Phinks did the same, and slowly, the gap between the two of you was closed as your lips met together in a kiss.

With the heavy scent of pool chemicals that surrounded you two, it was hard to smell much else, but your lips were soft against his. The kiss was a bit tame for his liking, but he let you do what you wanted for now as you readjusted your arms so they were wrapped around his neck.

One of his hands slid down your back to reach down and squeeze your ass, and you gasped into the kiss. He slipped his tongue into your mouth for a brief moment before you pulled away, your hand over your mouth as you looked away in embarrassment.

“I'm not sure we should do much more here,” you said, glancing up at the house behind him, “there are people watching. I'm not into that.”

“Where do you wanna go?” he asked. It didn't surprise him much that you two might have attracted an audience, and when he heard the door to the patio open from behind him, he chose to ignore it.

“I don't think we'll get much privacy here, so how about my place?” you asked.

“Do you usually bring home strangers?”

“Only the really cool ones.”

He grinned.

You were leaning in to kiss him again when you suddenly froze and turned your attention to something behind Phinks.

“Don't do that!” you yelled.

Phinks turned his head just in time to see his and your clothes land in the water, with the guy who'd invited him – Stu, he remembered – pointing and laughing after having thrown them. The annoying woman from earlier, the one who had whined at him for his can of beer, was also there, standing behind Stu and running off with him towards the gate in the fence.

Phinks saw red.

He let you go and swiftly exited the pool, following after the two even as the chill of the night air nipped at his skin. He barely felt it, and he didn't give a shit that he was running around barefoot either. All of his focus was on catching up to those two assholes who'd dumped his clothes in the pool.

He was angry enough that he didn't notice the sound of feet following after him.

The two perpetrators were in an alleyway between two rows of houses, drunkenly laughing their asses off. Their demeanor didn't change when Phinks caught up to them. The woman actually began to laugh harder, probably because Phinks was still wearing only his boxers.

Stu was trying to contain himself a bit, and put his hands up as an offering of peace.

“Hey man, it wasn't anything personal. Just a prank,” he said, “you can use the dryer, and I'll lend you some clothes-”

His sentence was cut off when Phinks grabbed both sides of his head and twisted it completely around, the cracking of his broken neck ringing out in the empty alley.

The sight of Stu falling to the ground with his head facing the wrong way had the woman instantly sober up, and she looked to Phinks as she opened her mouth to scream.

Barely a whisper of sound was able to escape as he did the same thing to her, and now Phinks was standing half-naked in an alley with two dead bodies.

“Obnoxious fucking people,” he muttered to himself.

Then there was noise that came from behind him.

Phinks turned and saw the other guy who'd been at the gas station on the ground, his arms barely supporting himself as his eyes were wide at the sight of his friends dead before him.

His eyes widened even further when he spotted the spider on Phinks' ribs, clearly recognizing what it meant as he whispered “oh my god.”

Make that three bodies, Phinks thought to himself as he rushed forward to snap his neck as well.

Three bodies that he needed to get rid of. If anyone else from the party came out here and found them, the police would be called immediately. He had no intentions of staying here any longer, but it'd be best to put a bit of distance between himself and the crime scene before the police were inevitably called.

He was dragging the other guy by his ankles and in the process of collecting the woman's body when someone walked out into the alley through one of the other entrances. An older woman, who was definitely not from the party and had come from another house, carrying a bag of trash walked out in front of Phinks, and like the guy right before, her eyes grew wide as she saw the sight of the dead before her.

She made a move to run back to her house, but Phinks picked up a pebble that he infused with nen and launched it at her head. It traveled through her skull and the fencing beside her, and blood sprayed out from the exit wound and splattered onto the fence as well as she fell to the ground.

This was turning into a goddamn mess, and after Phinks had thrown now four bodies over into a different backyard, he heard a voice calling out “mom?” from the direction that the woman with the trash bag had come from.

Fuck this. He needed to go.

When he returned to the backyard to retrieve his clothes, he found you on the patio. You were holding his jacket over the concrete, desperately trying to wring out the water that had soaked it completely. You were visibly shivering as you did so, with goosebumps running up your arms and your teeth chattering. He noticed his pants hanging off the fence that surrounded the patio, and while they weren't dry by any means, you had clearly done your best to get the water out of them. Meanwhile your own clothes laid in a soggy heap by your equally soaked bag.

You noticed him when he walked closer.

“I'm sorry,” you told him. You looked guilty for some reason.

“You didn't do it,” Phinks said, considerably calmer now.

“No. But I made a big deal about you getting in with me, and with Stu around I should've been paying attention. I'm really, really sorry.”

He was about to tell you to stop apologizing when he heard a shout coming from the direction of the alleyway.

Fuck. He forgot that he needed to leave.

Luckily you were the only one who noticed, as the rest of the party goers still had the doors and windows securely shut. He pulled on his pants and his sopping wet tank top, and the sensation of wearing those wet clothes was just as unpleasant as he had anticipated. At least his shoes were still dry.

You were still holding his jacket, looking confused as you looked off in the direction where you'd heard that voice. Phinks was about to just take it from you and leave, but when he looked you over again, he thought over the things you two had talked about, the things you had said and how you'd acted around him, and he came to a split second decision.

Grabbing your clothes and bag, he shoved them into your hands before he grabbed one of your arms and pulled you after him. You seemed startled, but you didn't question him as you were too surprised to think of anything to say. He led you out through the backyard and down to where he had parked his car, opening the passenger side door and pushing you inside. He then walked around to the driver's side, and within moments you both were speeding out of the neighborhood.

By the time he came to the highway there was a strong smell of pool chemicals that filled the car, and both of the front seats were slowly soaking up the excess water that dripped off of the two of you.

You seemed to be in a mild state of shock, as you had yet to say anything. You just sat in your still wet swimsuit looking rather confused while you still held onto the soaked clothing Phinks had forced onto you.

After a while you shuddered and finally spoke up.

“Do you think you could turn up the heat?” you asked him.

“Oh. Sure. Sorry.”

Phinks turned the heat up all the way, and after a few moments you seemed to relax a bit, though now you were glancing over at him while smiling nervously.

“Uh, so, there's a lot that I should probably be questioning,” you began, “but I'll start with if you knew why there was yelling?”

Should he lie? No, that might be weird if he pretended not to know.

“I punched that guy in the face. I think I broke his nose,” he told you, “that was likely his friend after he saw him.”

“Ah. Okay,” you said, “that's..... Not very good, but I think I get why you did that. You're gonna get charged with assault, though.”

Fat chance.

“I'll deal with that when I come to that,” he answered, “sorry if I put you in a tough position.”

“It's okay. Well, not really. But Stu's pranks have always been pretty bad and what he did was shitty, so I guess it was bound to happen sooner or later.”

“Think you can forgive me?”

“... Yeah, I think so. Just promise you won't do anything like that again.”

“I promise.”

“Okay,” you said as you nodded, “so second question: where are we going?”

“.... Not sure. Didn't have much of a plan besides getting out of there and going back to what I was doing,” Phinks admitted.

“So you're just back to driving around going wherever?”

“Seems like it.”

“Why did you bring me along?” you asked.

“.... Didn't want that to be the last time I saw you,” he said.

“Oh.....”

His answer ended up making you flustered again, and while you did seem to be holding some reservations about him with his admission of violence and the fact that he really had just kidnapped you, he could see you rationalizing everything in your mind and convincing yourself that this wasn't all that bad.

It was preferable if you did that. It made taking you with him a lot easier.

“Luckily for me I don't work tomorrow,” you said, “and since the day after that is Sunday and the campus store isn't open then, I also have that day off. So I think it's okay if I drive around with you for a bit. Just get me back by Sunday night, alright?”

“Don't worry. I'll get you back safe and sound,” he told you, and you visibly relaxed at his words.

You were a little naive, a little too trusting. But that was fine. Phinks liked that about you.

“Okay so third question,” you announced as you looked down at the wet clothes in your lap, “what should we do about this?”

“Right. Let me pull over.”

He stopped the car beneath a streetlight, and you sat sideways on the passengers seat while you held the clothes out of the car and wrung the water out of them as best you could. Phinks took the opportunity to change after you handed him his jacket, and he threw the mostly damp clothes in the backseat.

Glancing over at you, he did appreciate how much your swimsuit showed off while you tried to dry out your own clothes. But while he liked the idea of you staying as you were for the rest of the trip, you probably wouldn't be as big of a fan of that. Going over to his trunk once more, he dug around through his bag before he found what he was looking for.

“I don't have anything that will fit you well,” Phinks said as he made his way over to you, “but this should cover you up.”

What he handed you was the long white robe he wore on occasion, usually for combat or missions.

You seemed a bit surprised when you saw it, but you accepted it gratefully. Your gaze went to the jeweled eye that hung near the neck of the garment, and he heard you mumble about it being pretty.

He wondered briefly what you might think of the snake headpiece he usually wore with it, but the time for that would come later as you were currently slipping his robe over your head.

“Thank you,” you told him again as you threw your clothing in the back as well.

Then your attention went to your bag, and you frowned.

“What's wrong?”

In response to his question, you tilted your bag to the side and water began to pour out of it.

“Ah.”

“How much do you wanna bet that my phone is dead?” you asked as you reached inside.

As was expected, your phone screen stayed black when you hit the power button, and you sighed.

“And that's phone number three that Stu has destroyed.”

“Don't worry. It won't happen again,” he told you.

“You sure?”

“Positive.”

You tossed the now useless phone into your bag and looked back up to him as if to say “so what now?”

Phinks had an idea for that.

“Wanna go to a motel?”

“A motel? Wow, you sure know how to treat someone,” you said sarcastically.

“You really think I can get you into a nice hotel with you looking like that? You don't even have shoes,” he said.

“I didn't get a chance to grab them,” you responded, though you seemed to concede a bit.

“Could we stop somewhere tomorrow so I can get shoes or something?”

“I'll buy you a whole new wardrobe if that's what you want.”

You laughed at that, shaking your head and saying that you didn't need that.

Before too long, Phinks was back in the drivers seat while you watched the streetlights as the car passed them by, your fingers idly playing with the jewel on his robes as you did so. He had turned down the heat and turned on the radio, and though it still felt strange to be sitting in the wet seats, it wasn't bothering either of you as much anymore. The smell from the pool was mostly gone after driving a bit with the windows opened just a crack.

Except for the occasional car that drove in the opposite direction, you were the only ones on the highway.

“How far are you gonna drive?” you eventually asked.

He wanted to get out of the state at least. Phinks didn't want to deal with a confrontation with the law while also taking you along with him. He wanted to get as far as he could while you were still cooperative, and whenever you realized that there was no chance he'd be taking you back, he'd go to more extreme measures of keeping you with him. Your phone being dead was a good thing for him; you wouldn't be able to try and get help as easily.

“I think we've passed by three or four motels already,” you added, “was there something wrong with them?”

“No. Sorry. I got a bit distracted,” Phinks replied, “I've come to really like the highway at night. There's something soothing about it, I guess. Wanted to stay like this for a bit longer.”

You nodded in response and looked back out the window, your fingers still playing with the jeweled eye.

“Can I borrow your phone at some point tomorrow? I need to call someone just so everyone back home knows I'm okay. Don't want them to worry,” you said to him.

“Sure,” he said.

Arguing with you over that would seem strange. He'd just need to avoid that subject tomorrow.

He noticed when you yawned.

“Getting tired?” he asked.

“A little,” you said, laughing a little as you added, “this wasn't how I was expecting my night to go.”

“Same here.”

“I hope you decide to stop soon. I might not be up for it tonight if you're planning on continuing where we left off at the pool when we reach that motel.”

“That's fine. We'll have all day tomorrow, right?”

His words made you embarrassed again, and you shyly answered with a yes as you smiled to yourself.

So that was the plan, then. Drive as far as he could tonight, fuck your brains out tomorrow, then get away further before you figured things out. You would likely object, not liking the idea of being taken away from everything you'd ever known. But he was certain that after spending enough time with him, you'd prefer it. Your current life wasn't any good, but he was prepared for you to not understand that at first. And if he needed to tie you up and shove you into the trunk to keep you compliant, he could do that. Seemed like a pretty fool-proof plan.

You were yawning again.

“Get some sleep if you need to,” he said, “I'll wake you up when I find a place I like.”

You nodded. Soon after he saw you settling back into the seat and closing your eyes as you attempted to get some rest.

He liked the sight of you next to him, sitting in his clothes while you nodded off in his car. And when he turned his attention back to the empty highway, he was once again hit with the feeling like he was the only one in the world. A feeling that only came with seeing an area that was typically full of people seem completely abandoned.

But this time, though, he wasn't alone.

#reader insert #yandere #yandere hxh #phinks x reader #yandere phinks #phinks magcub #yandere hunter x hunter #yandere x reader

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