#it's like the '20s version of celebrities being papped

[thebramblewood]

Read an exclusive excerpt of "Chapter 5: The Mysterious Cal and Lily" from Tangled Vines: A Complete Investigation of the Vatore Disappearances, the bestselling phenomenon sweeping Sim Nation!

The advent of the Roaring '20s put a new city on the map. Prohibition was in full swing across the nation (though often loosely and selectively enforced), but citizens were more eager than ever to revel in excess. Producers of alcoholic beverages (including the Vatore family itself, having swiftly resumed business operations despite the loss of its future inheritors) transitioned to an outward emphasis on medical spirits while moving recreational production underground. Equally clandestine speakeasys began cropping up by the dozens, but one city's winding sidewalks, grimy storefronts, and labyrinthine system of underground tunnels made it particularly well-suited to hosting these secret locales. Soon enough, San Myshuno was the pinnacle of glitz, glamor, and elegant debauchery. All who attended a party wanted to be seen. Curiously, though, two of the names most often uncovered in tabloid archives, Cal and Lily, seemed to fully avoid the increasingly ubiquitous flash of the camera. While other frequenters of the speakeasy circuit often found their grainy black and white faces in print, providing endless fodder for the burgeoning gossip rag industry, this pair remained elusive, which of course sold even more papers. Fellow partygoers pitched first-hand accounts to the highest bidders, and readers clung onto every salacious word. Lily and Cal were always observed to arrive together, but she would soon make a beeline for the gramophone while he settled in at the bar. Nearly every report calls Lily an exquisite beauty with an almost supernatural ability for drawing men into her orbit. In some instances, partygoers describe a herd of suitors nearly erupting into fisticuffs as they competed for her attention. It is impossible to say how many of these accounts are exaggerated or even fabricated. Nevertheless, it is clear she was quite the force. At the end of the night, she would leave with her chosen companion, stupefied by his stroke of good luck, on her arm. Meanwhile, Cal would watch listlessly from a distance, nursing a glass of whiskey he was never observed to actually drink. The relationship between the two was unclear, as was his reason for accompanying her, as he seemed to have little interest in the raucousness surrounding him. He rarely engaged with other guests or even Lily herself, though there is at least one report of an argument in which he seemed with little success to be dissuading her from leaving with yet another man. One cannot help but draw parallels to a certain set of siblings with suspiciously similar names. Despite being younger, Caleb Vatore was always said to be protective over his sister Lilith's interests, even if she rarely heeded his advice. Digging into the newspaper archives at Myshuno Meadows Library unearths several more disturbing accounts. Increasingly, there were whispers that the men Lily seduced completely vanished from San Myshuno society after coming into contact with her. While there was a small spike in unsolved murder cases at the time, a concrete connection between the victims and the mysterious Lily cannot be made. In one story, which admittedly reads like a hallucinatory drug trip, Lily is described as a succubus with glowing red eyes and sharp blood-stained teeth. This account was clearly dismissed, for its revelations were never entertained further. All at once, the champagne and glitter dissolved into a more sober era, and these socialites vanished from public life just as swiftly. In isolation, similarities between Cal and Lily and the disappeared Vatore siblings may seem like mere coincidences. In truth, it cannot even be proven that they existed. No official records matching either individual have been discovered. One could argue that they were works of fiction concocted to boost sales or composites drawn from several individuals. However, considered alongside the evidence to be presented in later chapters, the theory that this duo and the Vatores are one and the same becomes too tantalizingly probable to dismiss.

#ts4 #sims 4 #sims 4 story #ts4 story #simblr #story: hzid #lilith vatore #caleb vatore #oops i dropped something #thanks to the magic of storytelling i've obtained the footage #anyway i've decided lilith only kills men (on purpose anyway) #she doesn't count the accidents #also i realized while writing this that it was very subconsciously inspired by this kind of obscure british film called bright young things #(which is itself based on the novel vile bodies by evelyn waugh) #i remember it mainly being about vapid awful people in a downward spiral of increasingly debauched behavior #(in other words highly recommended) #but specifically there's a reporter character played by james mcavoy who picks up intel at parties #and then feverishly dictates his reports by phone in the middle of the night to ensure they make the morning edition #that's exactly what i'm picturing here #it's like the '20s version of celebrities being papped #anyway if you read everything under the cut and then also made it this far you're a real one #gonna cool it on the lore for now and hold onto the more interesting bits a while longer

[the-empress-7]

Rumor-tracking anon here. I feel like I should make a side-tumblr with the name.

So many many apologies in advance for another long one. This one is incredibly nuanced because there are a lot of moving pieces and it does sound tinhatty but I PROMISE there's a point.

TL;DR - I need People Anon's help in trying to figure out the timing of the interview and the photoshoot if Kashner was filing his story around 8/2/17. I'm totally okay with extrapolating if she can only answer/give context using People's weekly format. My questions:

1) How long before a monthly magazine is published does the book close? 2) How long before the book closes are the articles and photographs due to be filed? 3) How far in advance of a publication's release are the advance copies/previews done?

The two three rumors I am working on are:

Harry proposed a very long time before they announced the engagement.

They kept the engagement a secret for a long time for a specific reason.

Something happened that caused the palace and Harry to "let" Meghan stay after the VF interview when in the past, Harry notoriously cut friends and girls out if they talked to the press.

And the Big Question is: when exactly did Harry propose?

So now the verrrrrrry long version. (feel free to put a cut here!)

Bower's VF excerpt says:

After Harry proposed, they discussed announcing the engagement when The Queen returned from her summer in Balmoral.

They were engaged when Meghan did the VF interview.

VF sent a preview copy when Meghan and Harry were in Botswana for her birthday, which Meghan saw after returning home.

The pictures accompanying the VF article were taken in London.

Meghan, Harry, and the Palace were angry that the VF story was about Harry. (Meghan b/c she wanted the focus to be her philanthropy, Harry b/c he didn't want to be in the article, and the Palace because she existed.)

From internet sleuthing -- all dates 2017 unless noted otherwise and I'm using American date convention (mm/dd).

Meghan shut her social media down in April 2017. We know she thrived on social media so she wouldn't have shut it down without something definite and concrete being given to her in return.

Meghan was papped with Harry in May 2017 - early May at polo and mid-May around Pippa's wedding.

Meghan did not attend Wimbledon 2017. (Serena wasn't playing so of course Meghan wasn't going to waste her time.) So she was not papped in London in late June/early July.

Per the Court Circular, Harry's summer holiday started 7/29. We know he was back in London by 8/29 as he attended the Diana Sunken Garden thing on 8/30.

Per the Court Circular, The Queen was in Balmoral from 8/7 to 10/10 so Harry and Meghan weren't planning to tell anyone they were engaged until at least 10/11.

Meghan's birthday is August 4. Meghan and Harry were papped at the airport in Botswana on 8/4 and her PR said there was a birthday party for her that night. We can assume Meghan flew into London around 7/28, when Harry took off for the summer.

Suits Season 7 announced filming dates of 4/4 - 11/15. Production actually wrapped on 11/23. The last pictures of Meghan on the Suits set were from 11/11. Meghan's stand-in tweeted on 11/17 and it seems to be a goodbye/thank you tweet, suggesting that 11/17 was her last day, meaning no more scenes involving Rachel Zane.

Suits Season 7 was split into half-seasons, with the first half airing in summer 2017 (7/12 - 9/13) and the second half airing in spring 2018 (3/28/18 - 4/25/18). This suggests that the production took a break in the summer for the cast to do PR for the premiere.

Members of Suits started doing PR for the new season in June 2017 with the ATX Festival. Meghan is seen in set photos taken 7/12 to celebrate filming Suits' 100th episode that Sarah Rafferty posted on IG.

On 11/20, Meghan moved to London after being spotted in the London airport and after movers were seen at her Toronto house.

The engagement was announced on 11/27.

So all of this to say I think the VF photoshoot was at the end of July, probably no later than 7/28 since Harry usually didn't work when she's visiting. Since Kashner (the VF writer) ended his story by saying Meghan texted him right before he was filing that she would be unreachable and a couple days later were the Botswana airport pics, that suggests he was probably filing the story around 8/4.

If Kashner filed on 8/4, then it was probably after a few weeks for VF to fact-check her, a week or two to write the story and turn in a draft for fact-checking, and a day or so for the interview. That puts the interview happening in early July, or at least sometime before July 12 when we know definitively she was still in Toronto on the Suits set. Which means that the photoshoot was either at the end of July when she was flying in ahead of the Botswana trip or in early/mid-May when she was papped at polo or Pippa's wedding. The latter sounds like it might be too early in the process since if the interview was early July, then they were probably negotiating the article in June with the offer being made late May/early June. (People Anon, help! Does this timeline sound reasonable? Is this the process?)

And if Bower's tea that they were engaged before she did the VF interview is true, then the evidence is indicating they actually got engaged in April or May. (Of course, it's also entirely possible there were other secret trips to London in the intervening time but when you look at Meghan's PR cycle, which always had a pap walk or a story about her being in London with Harry every 3-4 weeks like clockwork and there are no new stories between Pippa's wedding and August, it does seem unlikely.)

We know from their engagement interview that the proposal was very spur-of-the-moment, unexpected, and Harry had been unprepared. To me this sounds like Harry didn't have a ring for her. He just got caught up in the emotions of seeing her again and proposed, sans ring. Was that May? Maybe. Was that July? Maybe. Definitely wasn't November when she moved to London like their PR's been claiming since 2017. Definitely wasn't September or October like maybe they told friends, if they told people they were waiting till The Queen came back from Balmoral. Maybe Harry presented her with the ring around that time to make it official and that's their story, they're sticking to it, but it doesn't jibe with Bower's findings nor basic internet sleuthing.

(In other words, shenanigans afoot since the very beginning as everyone rightly suspected.)

So if they were secretly engaged when she did the VF interview, that means the proposal or the discussion to marry was in the late spring. And if Harry did propose in the late spring/mid-summer like the evidence shows (rather than the autumn like they claim), then why did they wait 4 to 7 months till November to announce? Why didn't they announce it around August 31st, the 20th anniversary of Diana's death, in a tribute to his mother's legacy? (It was guaranteed wall-to-wall press coverage and Meghan probably would've sold out the VF issue if they did, possibly cementing her as a "serious" cover girl at Kate's level.) Why didn't they announce it in September ahead of the Toronto Invictus Games and after the VF article? (Arguably they did with Meghan's strategic product placement of the Husband shirt.) Why didn't they announce it the second The Queen was back from Balmoral?

My theory: Harry knew they effed up with the VF article and delayed it to let the palace's anger blow over, and luckily Big Bro William to the rescue announcing Kate's third pregnancy right before Meghan's VF issue dropped so the firm could ignore the Meghan story in favor of pushing the new Cambridge baby.

And if Harry proposed before Meghan did the interview and if they were engaged before the issue dropped/the advance copy went out, then that explains why Meghan got to stick around after talking to the press about their relationship and why Meghan got the official royal treatment at Toronto IG despite being "just" a girlfriend; Harry was already committed and engaged to Meghan.

So finally FINALLY all this to say that People Anon might help me confirm this long-held Tumblr rumor: Meghan had something over Harry that caused him to keep her after she talked to VF about the relationship, and that was their engagement.

Whew.

If you want to respond with that Charlie Day gif from It's Always Sunny, the one where he's crazy on coffee explaining conspiracy theories in front of the wall of paper, I totally understand.

Although at this point I've been researching and writing this up for so long that now I'm doubting Bower's excerpt says they were engaged when she did the VF interview and I made that part up by overthinking it too much. I'm just going to click submit and you can tell me if I imagined that part.

I'll crawl back into my research hole now.

Phew. I hope you are saving all these somewhere.

Paging People Anon for Rumor Tracking Anon.

[1ddiscourseoftheday]

Mon 14 June ‘21

Louis Tomlinson Cooks is here!! Yeah it’s 100% for sure as delightful to watch Louis make himself a sandwich as you might have hoped, but how was his cooking? Well I’ll let Louis rate himself-- “I’m not gonna lie not that appetizing is it, I mean look at it,” he says when it comes time to taste his creation, plus, “chopping peeling slicing not great to be fair- everything else I’m all right” (he’s… not wrong, even aside from the peeler issues has this man ever held a knife??) but- “it probably tastes nice though as I said it’s not about presentation for me… [munches cutely]... it’s actually pretty banging, that’s actually quite nice!” Success! Maybe it’s cause he knows the secret to faking good cooking- “as you can see I don’t have a lot of cooking ability so the more butter the better,” I mean the experts can tell you, that’s advanced stuff right there! #Louis-aChild! Substituting mustard and ketchup for coleslaw is a bit of a bold move, but in a belated attempt to convince the kiddos to eat some healthy veg even though he won’t he does bravely try the cucumber strips despite being “not really a man for cucumber” and makes a pained attempt to be positive- “bit of crunch.” Oh and speaking of crunch I’m relieved to have learned that the waffle is NOT a waffle, it’s a crispy waffle shaped bit of potato; a much more reasonable fish sandwich addition than the American version of a potato waffle! Full Time Meals polled to see what people think of Louis cooking; the two choices are “it was amazing” and “the best,” THEY GET IT. My kind of Louis poll! Helen Seamons rated him a “10/10 for effort and entertainment”, Masterchef acknowledged Louis as one of their own, and Marcus Rashford keeps it simple- “my guy” with a lil heart. YEAH, SAME.

Harry showed up in Italy, where he was papped in Venice being driven around (with PA Luis) on a boat (as you do, in Venice). He’s in a cool embroidered Bode shirt and shades and fancy hair, looking good. He’s seen carrying his suitcase, taking photos, and resting his head on his arms looking like a model. One might think, since we just saw the My Policeman cast and crew on set celebrating the wrap of the shoot, that they were done filming and Harry was off to do something different, but nope, he’s there to film! The book has key scenes in Venice that folks had been wondering about the filming of, and David Dawson is also being boated around Venice for the paps, so, it seems that was just for the wrap of the *UK* filming, which makes sense I guess since it would mostly be different crew I imagine, and perhaps some of the main cast are done as well.

Liam’s NFT sale is happening tomorrow! If you’re confused and want more info, I’M NOT GONNA HELP THAT MUCH… uh but I mean you can check out Liam’s youtube video explaining though I would guess that won’t help much (even Liam thinks so; “there’s probably websites that explain a lot better than me” he admits). There is a roundup now posted of what’s on offer for the buyers of the NFTs but I’m gonna be really honest with you, I’m more confused now than I was before. It’s clear that there are only SIX LONELY BUG NFTs right? They for sure said that I believe. But the packages for each different piece (token bundles) seem to me like they’re available to multiple buyers? Like maybe you don’t get the NFT but multiple top bidders on each get the extras? Like they can’t be selling multiple copies of the NFT... can they?! Isn’t the WHOLE POINT that only one person gets to own it? I DON’T FUCKING KNOW I AM SORRY. What I think I understand to be true: the six NFT buyers get to go to “a once-in-a-lifetime immersive dining experience at Resorts World Las Vegas” (this is the dinner with Liam and “a selection of crypto leaders from around the world” which takes place on display inside a giant glass box) and also “a bespoke commemorative presentation box containing the world’s leading holographic display... with audio... and a custom made Lonely Bug commemorative coin,” and “a unique QR code directing the owner to a special ‘Director’s Cut’ edit of the short digital film ‘Making Of Lonely Bug Collection’ which features unreleased footage from the day of the drop showing the creators' reactions when the winning bids came in” (I mean YEAH I would think it’s unreleased it literally hasn’t happened?) But then there are really a lot of other extras including tickets with Meet & Greet access to any Liam Payne headline show around the world, admission to pool and cinema parties in Vegas with Liam, signed art, non-Liam extras (I will literally bid to NOT have 20 minute phone calls with those crypto entrepreneurs PLEASE… but that’s just me), and access to an online party hosted by Liam; I really get the impression many of these, especially the last one, are just crypto tokens that are for sale that aren’t linked to the main Lonely Bug NFTs and many more than 6 people can buy them but a lot of the extras I’m not clear on which it is. Perhaps tomorrow I’ll understand better WE WILL SEE.

Liam also dropped by the discord last night to say some hellos (after a “long long day”) and that he “bought a piece of NFT art of myself tonight I’m going to give it as a prize Monday night so someone can own a piece of art that was owned by me” (an even less tangible bragging point than simply owning an NFT wow that’s an achievement) and the most important update- “I want a French Bulldog”! Oh and he said “that’s like one I did myself” in his fanart channel to a pic of a tiny crocheted illustration of Louis and Harry holding up a rainbow flag. Didya Liam?? (...Liam is crocheting??) Anyway I recognize who it’s supposed to be because it’s based on a familiar piece of fanart, but Liam definitely might NOT realize it’s meant to be someone specific, and tbh I’m more <eyeballs> at him saying that at the rainbow flag crocheted thing than at it being shippy.

Our Song acoustic version is out this Friday!! And Niall talked about NH3 some in an interview today; “I’m in the studio most days, it feels really good. I’m kinda in the latter stages of it and then I’ll go get a band together and go in and record the whole thing. I’ve just kind of been writing for the past 9 or 10 months and really enjoying it” and “It sounds like a complete album. God knows when it’s coming out because I’d like to be able to get around the world to see all the fans as well” and “It’s different. It sounds a lot more grown up. I’m 27 so it’s about time. I really wanted to kinda cement a sound. The singles I’ve released previously have all been kinda different sounds. I would like to have my ballad sound & like a cemented uptempo sound.” He and Anne Marie also talked about one of the other songs they wrote together saying, “It’s kind of like a, how do you describe it- guitar driven meets Tom Petty meets Katy Perry meets…” but say “We haven’t really decided if we are putting it out yet, the conversations are kinda happening... but it’s completely different (from Our Song).”

#liam payne #whyyyy so confusing #niall horan #louis tomlinson #YES BABE please do bake off now PLEASE #Harry styles #looking so good even though those shorts are AWFUL IMO hilariously frumpy #love that #14 jun 21 #overall I do not think liam should get any more dogs #but a small dog he took everywhere with him would be ADORABLE #(more dogs than he has previously owned I mean he currently has no dogs)

[1ddotdhq]

💙 Thurs 24 Dec ‘20 🎂

Happy BIRTHDAY, Louis!! You are: golden, the end of June, perfect now, a rainbow paradise, the habit that we can’t break, and, most importantly, TWENTY NINE YEARS OLD! Fans, friends, charities and industry folks alike spent their day sending well wishes to Louis. Allontheboard put up a poem with only 1D titles to celebrate, Free My Meal, Bluebell Wood, Sandy Beales, Paul Arthurs (Oasis), and many more called him brilliant (or a legend, etc.) and wished him well. Helene, Eleanor and Krystle put up new pictures of them with him and sent him love. Eleanor was denied the opportunity for the usual “clubbing and pap pics” by COVID but got around it by posting an old vid of her and Louis from one of those outings... in 2017, for HER birthday, at a gay club. Why not just a cute cozy pic of their stuck-at-home celebrations?? Oh riiiight cause that's not a real thing lol. Charlie Lightening wished him a happy birthday and said that the LIVEstream was a killer way to end the year (it was!). And then the FANS!! Well, we spent the day trending various hashtags and tweets and reminding the world that Louis’ a KING and a BOSS and a KILLER musician, and only we got a special thank you from Louis- he came on twitter to say, “Thank you for all the birthday messages. The money you raised for all your individual projects is unbelievable. Love to you all x”. (Did the Brit Awards or Only The Poets have a Louis charity drive? No they did not, that's a thank you for US!) We also got the uncut/unedited version of an interview from early March 2019 courtesy of a fan, as a treat! Seeing him chatting cheerfully away, unaware that such a horrible tragedy is about to strike feels- to me at least- somewhere between uncomfortable and vaguely indecent, but if you can divorce it from that his physicality in the unguarded moments when the interview pauses is, always, a beautiful glimpse behind the curtain, and revisiting the familiar rote answers about how he hoped to have an album by next year, maybe, is exciting and satisfying, knowing that it finally happened and it's HERE and celebrated and complete!

The discourse about the TPWK video is raging (how dare HSHQ release a video about kindness? When they, themselves, are SO UNKIND to US POOR FANS by making random other people who are not their clients say things that we don't like??), and I’d like to take the moment to remind everyone that Jeff Azoff is not in fact feeding cue cards to people who AREN’T his client (i.e. Liam, Lou Teasdale, Brett and co., etc) and that we should all really reconsider claiming that there are shadowy figures pulling everyone's strings like puppets, rather than that this is an industry focused on financial gain and mostly indifferent to collateral damage. And besides all that, I personally would much rather have a video with Harry ballroom dancing than NOT! It seems that someone isn’t completely on board with us having that video yet, though: accounts posting it were gone after heavily on twitter for copyright violations, and if you don't believe us that lots of things happen that aren't directly managed by HSHQ, what do you call HSD getting caught up in the sweep? Clearly THEY thought their connection to HQ meant they were immune, and left the video up when the other UAs saw what was up and deleted it, but nope! Which works out great for us, an excellent birthday present for their least favorite guy, Louis (and for us fans, SUCK IT JERKS!) Jeff does do some things though, and protecting HSD is one of them, so I suppose they'll be back. And speaking of people who do their jobs, we found out today that Shia LaBoef (who was originally cast as Jack in DWD) did not leave due to scheduling conflicts, but rather, Olivia Wilde fired him because of abuse allegations. Good Riddance! Talk about a glow up for that role, Shia--> Harry is a serious upgrade!

Liam and Roman have another socially distanced and randomly cut advent alarm, which claims Liam being afraid of spoons was one of the truths in their little game though he has repeatedly told us that's no longer the case, SUS, and told all of us to get ready ‘cuz * sings * Santa Claus is comin’ tonight! (I’m singing it, but sadly, they didn’t). Liam DID play the part of Santa and gave LP Show DJ Deewan a lovely bottle of champagne to ring in the new year. And he’s not the only one who mentors and spreads love: Alone, an Irish charity serving the elderly thanked Niall (and his Modest!Golf partner Mark) for recent contributions, Casey Lowery shared the story of going clubbing with Zayn’s PA who then put him in contact with Zayn and got him his record deal (awwww I want more mentor!Zayn stories!!), and we got a behind the scenes shot of an old Z photoshoot! The gifts abound! So it looks like we’ve got lots to celebrate: let’s celebrate all of the lights for Louis, H’s sparkly jacket, Liam waiting for Santa Claus, Niall’s phenomenal Christmas Toy drive donation, and Zayn enjoying a Harry Potter filled Christmas. Happy Holidays to all!

#Louis Tomlinson #Harry styles #liam Payne #Zayn #happy Christmas to those who celebrate! #and a very happy Thursday for the rest of you! #anyways! #song of the day! #winter song by Sarah Barellies

[whatiwillsay]

late stage swiftgron - the folklore era - 1.0

this post will include all relevant and major activities between taylor and dianna since taylor announced folklore on the morning of July 23, 2020.

click here for a dianna’s spotify masterpost (we are only including the most loud spotify activities on this post but it’s all very interesting)

tagging @jennyboom21​, @goldenageofsomethingblue​, and @tayloragron​ to help me out if i miss something (and ofc all of you swiftgrons who help out with the blog, don’t hesitate to let me know if i miss something major)

JULY 23, 2020 

-  8 AM EASTERN - TAYLOR ANNOUNCES FOLKLORE TO COME OUT AT MIDNIGHT  

 -  THAT AFTERNOON - DIANNA UPLOADS A NEW PLAYLIST TO SPOTIFY ENTITLED I’LL BE AROUND, WITH ONE SONG ON IT - ‘I’LL BE AROUND’ BY FLOOR CRY:

-  DIANNA ALSO STREAMS THE SONG ‘I LOVE YOU SO’ BY THE WALTERS:

this song contains a very loud lyric that makes us believe ‘the 1′ is about dianna:

JULY 24, 2020 

-  MIDNIGHT - FOLKLORE COMES OUT

-  SOME TIME THAT AFTERNOON - DIANNA ATTENDS NAYA RIVERA’S FUNERAL IN LA

JULY 25, 2020

-  AFTERNOON - DIANNA TURNS OFF HER SPOTIFY LISTENING FOR THE REST OF THE DAY AND INTO THE NEXT DAY (WE THEORIZE TO LISTEN TO FOLKLORE)

-  DIANNA’S SOON TO BE EX HUSBAND, WINSTON MARSHALL, POSTS THIS SHADY ASS PIC TO INSTAGRAM WITH THE CARDIGAN LYRICS WHILE HE PLAYS A BOARD GAME WITH HIS BAND MATE

JULY 29, 2020

-  DIANNA POSTS A LOUDLY DOLLY BIRTHDAY POST FOR MOLLY’S BIRTHDAY

-  TAYLOR RELEASES THE “cabin in candlelight” VERSION OF CARDIGAN

JULY 30, 2020

-  DIANNA IS RATHER ACTIVE ON SPOTIFY INCLUDING A STREAM OF ‘HAPPY TOGETHER’ COVERED BY FLOOR CRY WHICH SEEMS TO BE A DOLLY SONG (there is a very cute video of them goofing around on a beach, pretending to make out, being very adorable and affectionate with each other - dianna posted it and specifically edited it to add the song happy together)

-  THE BLOG GETS AN ANON REMINDING US HOW DIANNA WOULD LISTEN TO PALE BLUE EYES BY THE VELVET UNDERGROUND AROUND THE TIME SWIFTGRON WAS BREAKING UP IN 2013, WE PUBLISH AND DISCUSS ON MAIN

AUGUST 4, 2020

-  DIANNA STREAMS PALE BLUE EYES BY VELVET UNDERGROUND ON HER PUBLIC SPOTIFY 5 DAYS WE DISCUSSED HER LISTENING TO THAT SONG IN 2013 HERE ON THE BLOG

-  TAYLOR IS SPOTTED IN CAPE COD

AUGUST 5, 2020

-  TAYLOR NO-HOMO’S BETTY ON COUNTRY RADIO

-  DIANNA STREAMS PALE BLUE EYES AGAIN

AUGUST 6, 2020

-  KEVIN TEASES SWIFTGRON ON SHOWMANCE AND TALKS ABOUT TAYLOR LOOKING FOR SOMEONE (LIKELY DIANNA) ON THE GLEE SET IN FEBRUARY OR MARCH 2014, POSSIBLY CONFIRMING THAT SWIFTGRON PINING WENT ON LONGER THAN WE EARLIER THOUGHT

-  TAYLOR IS SPOTTED BRIEFLY IN LA WITH JOE

AUGUST 8, 2020

-  DIANNA IS CONFIRMED TO BE BACK IN NYC

AUGUST 9, 2020

-  DIANNA TRULY SNAPS, CRAVES WET PUSSY ON MAIN IN THE PLATFORM PRESENTS EDWARD SNOWDEN SKIT.  WE LIKE TO PRETEND THAT SHE DID THIS TO MAKE UP FOR TAYLOR’S NO-HOMO OF BETTY

AUGUST 15, 2020

-  BOTH OUR GIRLS POST TO SOCIAL MEDIA ABOUT SUPPORTING THE USPS WITHIN THE SAME HOUR

-  DIANNA IS ON A FRIEND’S SOCIAL MEDIA IN CONNECTICUT

AUGUST 18, 2020

-  THE LAKES (WHICH IS A SONG ABOUT TAYLOR WAITING FOR HER MUSE) AND THE DELUXE VERSION OF FOLKLORE COMES OUT

-  TAYLOR DISCUSSES THE MEANING BEHIND EXILE ON RADIO

AUGUST 19, 2020

-  DIANNA’S DIVORCE IS ANNOUNCED AROUND 8 AM EASTERN TIME

AUGUST 20, 2020

-  ESCAPISM FOLKLORE CHAPTER RELEASED

AUGUST 21, 2020

-  DIANNA IS SPOTTED IN NYC WITH HER HAIR CUT AND FRESHLY DYED

-  DIANNA GAY RUMORS SWIRL AS WELL AS HER CONNECTION TO TAYLOR, IT ALL SEEMS TO BE PICKING UP STEAM,  THE BLOG PREDICTS A JOE x TAYLOR STUNT

-  DIANNA’S WIKIPEDIA PAGE IS EDITED, A MORE FEMININE PICTURE IS MADE HER MAIN PICTURE, SEVERAL PEOPLE ARE EDITING HER PERSONAL LIFE SECTION.  SWIFTGRON RUMORS ARE ADDED TO IT:

IT APPEARS AS THOUGH A USER GOING BY KINGSIF MAKES THESE EDITS:

AUGUST *22*, 2020

-  IT IS ONE OF DIANNA’S GOOD FRIEND’S, SELBY’S BIRTHDAY.  SELBY (WHO WAS AT THE FUN CONCERT IN FALL 2013) POSTS TO INSTAGRAM WITH BOTH MTR AND WILDEST DREAMS PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND.  DIANNA DOES NOT PUBLICLY WISH HER A HAPPY BIRTHDAY (tho she didn’t post for selby’s birthday last year, however she didn’t like molly’s selby birthday dedication and she usually does comment on posts molly has made for selby’s birthday or like it or both in the past, she also didn’t comment on or like tracy dubb’s selby birthday post) 

AUGUST 23, 2020

-  SLEEPLESS NIGHTS FOLKLORE CHAPTER RELEASED

AUGUST 24, 2020

-  DIANNA IS IN CHILMARK, MA AT A LAKE WITH FRIENDS (it’s probably a coincidence but this location is not too far a drive or ferry ride from taylor’s place - about an hour)

AUGUST 25, 2020

-  DIANNA IS HAPPY AND FRESH AND CUTE ON THE SHIVA BABY LIVE STREAM

AUGUST 26, 2020

-  SALTBOX FOLKLORE CHAPTER RELEASE

-  THE BLOG POSTS THE SPOTIFY SINCE FOLKLORE MASTERPOST

-  A FEW HOURS LATER SPOTIFY GLITCHES AND/OR DIANNA GOES PRIVATE ON SPOTIFY, IT IS HARD TO TELL WHICH HAPPENED OR IF BOTH THINGS HAPPENED.  SHE DOESN’T STREAM AGAIN UNTIL 9/2/2020

-  DIANNA IS PAPPED IN NYC CARRYING A BOOK DESCRIBED AS RAUNCHY AND QUEER LMAO

-  DIANNA SHOWS UP IN INSTAGRAM STORIES OF SOMEONE WEARING A MASK AND A DETROIT BLOWS SHIRT

AUGUST 28, 2020

-  DIANNA SHOWS UP IN A DOG’S INSTAGRAM POSTS, RARE BTS FOOTAGE OF HER IN HER AMAZING ROMEO DRAG FOR HER ROMEO AND JULIET PHOTOSHOOT FROM 2019

-  TAYLOR NATION POSTS A PICTURE OF TAYLOR WITH WINE FROM THE FOLKLORE LIVE CHAT THAT TOOK PLACE THE EVENING OF THE 23RD RIGHT BEFORE FOLKLORE DROPPED TO CELEBRATE NATIONAL *RED* WINE DAY

AUGUST 29, 2020

- DIANNA’S INVOLVEMENT IN A PLAY OR FILM ADAPTATION OF A TALE OF TWO CITIES GOES PUBLIC ON INSABELLA MACPHERSON’S INSTAGRAM.  THE QUOTE REFERENCED IS, “IT WAS THE BEST OF TIMES IT WAS THE WORST OF TIMES”

-  THE OSSA YOUTUBE CHANNEL SNAPS AND SENDS SWIFTGRON MAINSTREAM SHOWING THAT NO, THEY’RE NOT OVER SWIFTGRON SO WHY SHOULD WE BE OVER IT?  THEY ADD SWIFTGRON RUMORS TO A VIDEO TALKING ABOUT WHO ALL THE GLEE CAST HAS DATED.

as of 9-4-2020 9 am central this video now has 115 k views:

AUGUST 30, 2020

-  DIANNA’S OLD BOSS RYAN MURPHY FOLLOWS TAYLOR ON INSTAGRAM, MAKING HER THE 13TH PERSON HE FOLLOWS (we speculate that taylor’s music will be featured on his upcoming movie, the prom)

-  TAYLOR WINS VMA FOR BEST DIRECTION FOR THE MAN, SHE GIVES A DIGITAL ACCEPTANCE SPEECH AND ENDS IT WITH A TENDER “I HOPE I GET TO SEE YOU SOON.”

AUGUST 31, 2020

-  THE BLOG REQUESTS DIANNA TO COME BACK TO SPOTIFY:

SEPTEMBER 2, 2020

-  DIANNA COMES BACK TO SPOTIFY WITH TWO VERY INTERESTING PLAYLISTS (songs that seem to specifically and blatantly reference taylor’s lyrics)

SEPTEMBER 3, 2020

-  DIANNA PAPPED IN NYC OUT BOOK SHOPPING 

SEPTEMBER 4, 2020

-  CAM SNAPS AND DECIDES TO CELEBRATE THE FAIRFAX FLEA MARKET ANNIVERSARY BY MAKING THIS MASTERPOST. HAPPY SWIFTGRONTEMBER.

what does it all mean?

as you all know, this blog does not think swiftgron is together (other than being friendly and on cordial or even close terms)  however we do think swiftgron is being referenced by kevin, her wikipedia, and that news video as part of a narrative.  we are not entirely sure what that narrative is but we have two very specific ideas.  if you hang around the blog or discord you probably know what our two theories are.  we are not comfortable blogging them publicly right now.

the usps post coordination is very loud to us as well along with the outside sources commenting on swiftgron.

it is not just our small circle of delulu 2020 swiftgrons that notice something going on with the girls.  they are referencing each other and seem to be circling one another and normal people are taking note.

i probably missed a lot so please ping me if i did (esp about taylor, we don’t track her as closely as we do dianna, we’re going to start though) and please read over this post with big swiftgron intelligence agency eyes 👀👀👀!  if there are connections and “coincidences” that stand out to you anon the blog or comment please!

and that’s what you missed on swiftgron

#timeline #late stage swiftgron #swiftgron folklore era 1.0 #spotify #magick #swiftgron #gaylor swift

[makeupbychio]

goodnight n go // C.H

pairing : Calum Hood x Reader.

summary : you are a famous pop singer and one normal night in your life Calum literally came to change everything.

words : 8.5k

warnings : fluff, angst and swearing.

a/n : hi babies, so I tried to do this gender neutral because I’m trying to write things for everyone without specifying gender, sexuality, physical appearance, etc. Feedback is more than welcome. Credits to the owner of the photo, and the Instagram posts.

italics means song lyrics.

bold means posts on social media.

inspired by : that one second laugh Ariana Grande does in ‘everytime’ studio version and ‘goodnight n go’ live version. And these videos (links down below in the blurb)

You are a pop star, already part of the pop culture, on tons of playlists made by platforms. So your life is always on the public eye even when you don’t post in your social media the paparazzis and social accounts always doing that for you. It wasn’t like that at the beginning, the world barely knew your name, your shows were for 50 in the room, then 100, then 1000, now a whole arena and with two dates in some cities. You have learned how to deal with the dizzy things of being famous thanks to your fans, family, friends and your own power so at the end of the day you would not change leaving your heart on stage singing and dancing every night at all even when you know that it is crazy, yeah, it is crazy there outside. How people that you don’t know tells you how you changed their lives with your music, how you saved them, tattoos in their bodies inspired by your lyrics and style.

It is been crazier lately. You write your songs inspired by your own experiences or your loved ones experiences. You just finished a tour and after a good break for a whole season you are back writing and planning a new album. You were writing a song based on a reckless love but the song couldn’t make it to the previous album because you never finish it and you didn’t want it as an interlude. But you restart it because life slapped you in the face because 3 months ago you broke up with your partner. You are laying on bed looking at some pictures of you two together walking on the streets taken by paps. The light of the screen lighting your face. And god, how you didn’t realize tons of things?, in every picture you are looking at your ex like a fool completely in love but people could not say the same coming from the other person. You were in love, your ex really loved you at first but the last months of the relationship barely paid attention to you. That is when you remembered one of your fights.

“I waited for you for almost two hours! You could at least answered my messages or you could call me! So I would leave the restaurant and don’t waste my time on you” you said loudly pointing at its face when you came back home and acting like nothing happened. You were furious.

“I know, sorry I’m tired I spend the whole day with my friend I didn’t see him in a while” your ex sighed laying on your bed. “Don’t wanna argue”.

“I don’t care about your friend! You could tell him to hang out another day. It was a special day for us you asshole” you said giving an angry look and leaving the room.

It was supposed to be a special day that day. You were back from your South America leg of the tour and you received the notice of awards nominations so you decided to celebrate by having dinner and then go to the movies together. But your ex didn’t show up, and it wasn’t the first time. You just asked for simple things like going to the beach or just receive love. So even you were angry, you came back to their arms every time.

You thought that then a good fuck or a pretty face would fixed everything, but no. Your naive head at that moment thought that things were going to change, or that your lover was the love of your life.

Now you are looking at the last picture of you two that was seen together walking out a store and even bugs can notice how disillusioned your expression and body language are in that photo. You are hanging by their arms but looking at the floor with your head down. The other person also was trying to hide it with a cap and focused on the road.

‘Oh God’ you sigh at the picture knowing how ridiculous you looked. You lock your phone and throw it to your side of the huge bed now empty the other side. You are sitting with your legs crossed in your bed looking outside your window. It is late in the night so the city lights are your view and it reminds you that night when you called your best friend to tell her about you were thinking to end your relationship. She is always been supportive with you and every time you were going to make your decision you postpone it till finally it happened. You remembered that you cried a lot that night you saw them leaving your apartment and hours later you were still crying listening to sad music with your best friend looking at the roof. 

Now you decide to restart the song you left half done. Your dog joined you in bed, you went for a cup of hot chocolate and you start writing it.

+

The next day early in the morning you are in your way to the studio once you are ready with your makeup trying to hide your tiredness that you wrote till 3 am and put your studio outfit which consists on a big hoodie so big that the sleeves are always covering your hands but comfiness is first.

Your band and crew arrived and you have your coffee. Even when it is a sad song coming from your experience you want to put energy in this one like one of those nights you fought, how your blood was running in your veins and how deeply you knew that your relation was pointless but you were going to fall every time. The energy being aware of that but at the same time an energy by saying I’m done, I get over you but I know that I was a fool for you but not anymore. 

You explain that to everyone when all of you are thinking about the melody and beats. Most of the people in the room insist and show you a sad melody and you are starting to get frustrated because they are not listening to you and your idea you are looking for. 

You decided to move on on another two songs that you have complete. During breaks to eat something, drink water, go to the next studio and say hi to people that you know and fooling around with your own crew now it is dark outside and you are thinking to call it a wrap for today but the urge to at least figure it out the musicality of the song you wrote last night it is bigger.

But all of you are tired and ran out of ideas and your manager enters the soundproof box to tell you that the room is reserved for another artist from midnight till dawn. So you have 3 hours left to record this song or try again another day.

When you are talking to your favorite producer, who also is your friend, a tall man enters the room with headphones and the music too loud for not noticing the room full of people. When he saw the big group of people he freezes and apologies already leaving when you stop him recognizing him.

“Calum?” you said getting up from your seat in front of all the buttons of the huge synthesizer.

“Y/N?” he asks checking if this is real.

You nod at him and hug him because it is been a while, almost 2 years without seeing him. He is so happy to see you, the last time you were together was in an awards after party and you know him since 4 years ago when you met him and his band on an awards show that you presented his band and their performance and you saw it from the corners of the stage and waited to congratulated them because you are respectful with others musicians work, they asked for a picture and after that you have been friends but your busy life didn’t let you hang out with them but always exchanging likes, comments or messages on the dms on social media. 

“Omg how are you?” he asks you while he hugs you with his strong arms the height difference is notorious so he lays his right cheek on top of your head. He knows about your love situation, but to be honest he was not sad about that. Not at all. But he is not going to take advantage of that.

“Fine and you? Omg I miss you so much, what are you doing here alone?” you say to him confused not seeing all the 5sos boys.

“We are recording our new album and the guys should be here” he says checking the hour on his watch and then quickly his phone if there is a message.

“Finally new 5sos music!” you say and laugh.

“Yeah, we don’t have the ability like you to drop music every year.” he teases you.

“Hey!” you punch him softly on his ribs. “First things first, you can do that too if you want to drop music and second, actually right now I’m struggling with a song” you explain to him all of your situation when his phone rings. Ashton is on the other side of the line.

“Cal, we said at midnight!” Ashton said.

“Oh crap, I don’t know why I understood it was at 9 pm...K’...Bye, see ya’” Calum answers to his friend before hanging out the call.

He explains to you the situation even when you listened to what Ashton said. Calum tells you that it was nice to see you but he should be back at midnight but you stop him letting him know if he wants he can stay.

“Are you sure?” he asks knowing that maybe that could bother your crew.

“Of course Cal!” you say. And even when his house it is like 20 minutes away by driving he could come back when it is his band’s turn to use the studio but to be honest again he would really love to hang out a while with you. He always finds you attractive and your voice is one of the most angelical for him.

After he greeted the rest of the group he sits close to you listening your conversation with your producer.

“What if you add little adlibs and drums?” Calum suggests but he regrets if the producer would get angry. “Sorry man, I know it is your work and I am just a guest and-” 

“It is okay! Actually that is a good idea dude” your producer say asking Calum to show him what he said.

Calum and you enters the box and he sits to play the drums.

“Ashton is teaching me a little bit now that we are roommates” he jokes about it while taking the drumsticks.

“I saw that joke you did to Ashton! It was hilarious and his response” you point at him.

So you and Calum organized that he would play something in the drums first and then you start singing or reading the lyrics to catch the rhythm. He shows you a freestyle moment with the drums since he’s been doing that in his house to practice. The producer in the other side of the glass tells you from the speaker that there is a beat that maybe could fit. So once back again listening to beats ideas ordering to make that beat faster or slower, louder or pronounced then your band is working with the guitar, bass, keyboard and your drummer continues what Calum started and last but not least you are thinking where to sing it with high notes that it is your biggest characteristic.

All the people in the room are tired, your manager and part of your crew left early because they have meetings for some upcoming festivals to schedule. You let your band know that is the last effort of this week then you’ll be back again the next one rehearsing for an awards performance.

Calum now is in the other side of the glass next to the producer watching and listening all of this process of making this record. He is having fun and he realizes he could hear to your voice all night. It takes a lot of takes, to the final result of a song and Calum knows that perfectly.

You want to achieve the highest note of the song in the last chorus of the song in the last line. You should have record that first because it is getting hard for you to reach with a tired vocal cords after doing the rest of the song and the ad libs. You sigh frustrated at another failure of that last chorus.

“Y/N, should we call it a wrap for today?” your producer asks you softly. To be honest, you don’t want it after all of the work behind to finally get this song built.

“Excuse me” Calum says confident to the producer to take control of the speaker. “Y/N, listen to me, this is the last effort I know that ya’ can do this… You got this” he says looking at you directly in the eye. You nod and take a deep breath to try again and ‘he was right’ you thought to yourself when you freaking nailed it not just one high note, you reached it also the lines of the outro of the song.

Once you open your eyes when you keep singing with not that much power the last line. You laugh hiding your smile with the sleeve of your hoodie because the first thing you see is Calum stunned with his arms crossed on his chest and one hand full of rings lifted to cover his mouth. You start clapping to your band and say through your microphone ‘thank you’ to the rest of the people.

“Girl, you fuckin’ blew my mind” he says so excited mimicking what he said once you left the recording side of the room.

Minutes later everyone is saying goodbye to you and once again you thanked everyone for their job and energy as always and telling your producer to call you to edit the song other day. 

Now you are alone with Calum while you start packing your things. “Magic” you say looking at the clock with 15 minutes in your favor.

You use that time catching up on general things, like music, family, next awards, and a little bit of gossiping and of course asking about the rest of the boys.

“So happy for you guys, I can see that you are happy with this new era” you say after listening to Calum talking so passionate about what he and his band are doing. “I want to wait for the guys because I miss them. Do you think Michael is still in love with me?” you joke about it in a friendly way since Michael told you you were his crush, so he always reacts so excited and weird with you.

“No, he can’t react like he used to”. Calum laughs and you understood because you congratulated Michael on his engagement.

Minutes later, the boys and the rest of the crew arrived making noise with a lot of energy as always ready for a recording night but at the end they are always laying on the floor waiting for the team to call it a wrap.

“You gotta be kidding me!” Luke says running to hug you by lifting you because he is so tall and he missed you so much. You laugh and hold him tight. You say hi to the rest of the boys and you look at Calum next to you when you both noticed Michael is trying to act serious and cool around you when later he is going to ask Calum "Did Y/N said something about me?".

After a couple of minutes talking to the boys catching up about life, their crew called them to start the session so you have to say goodbye.

"Thanks again Cal, you saved my life today" you say goodbye to him with a kiss on the cheek and then the same with the rest. "K' guys bye, hope you have a good night".

You are stepping into your car when Calum calls you running behind you. "Y/N! before you leave, I lost all of my contacts when Ashton threw my phone into a pool…" you laugh at how they always been like that. "So if you can give me your number again if one day you want to hang out with me- with us".

You both exchange numbers and say goodbye.

+

Your producer laughs hearing that take where you stop singing and take a second to laugh at Calum’s face. “You want to put the laugh in the song too?”

https://www.instagram.com/p/B8EMIEPCF5y/

You don’t know if it was a joke or a serious question. You think for a minute at how frustrated you were that night with your team trying to build this song and thankfully Calum was there to help and give his opinion, also that laugh confirms how this song is not sad at all even when people were saying to you that it should be because of your breakup.

“Yeah” you answer and think about that little good time hanging out with Calum. You record a short video of that laugh that is going to be in the song, letting know your fans that you are in the studio pointing with your phone at the computer. 

Your stories on Instagram are always like a puzzle to your fans, like what does this means? what is this? when? where? new song? album? tour? collab? video?. Most of the times you add emojis, letters, or numbers that are meaningful to decipher the message and also to tease.

+

“Hello?... Calum? Can you hear me?” you say through the phone.

“Y/N? Hi! Yes, I can…” he answers leaving the room. “Sorry, I was so into playing my bass, we are writing a new song”.

“Oh sorry, if you are busy I can call you later-” you say softly and gentle.

“No no no. Ehmm, how are you? Tell me” he say surprised that you actually call him. He is giving you all of his attention listening to you.

“I’m fine and you? I’m calling you because we finished the song and I would like to know if you want to appear in the track info, cause’ ya’ know… you helped with the drums and other stuff” you wait for his answer, you are nervous of his response. Why? You have done this all the time with other collabs, ‘maybe because he is so intimidating but at the same time the cutest’ you think to yourself.

In the other side of the call, he is surprised and also he finds this so cute from you because he thinks that he barely contributed. “Ehhm, yes- I mean if you are okay with this I’m okay too”.

+

@MTV: Biggest return of Y/N!, who just announced a new single and a new collaboration TONIGHT!, a new album, and a performance for the VMAS. *internal screams*.

@MTV: Don’t forget to watch the VMAS this Sunday at 8 pm, amazing performances by Y/N, 5 Seconds Of Summer, Halsey, Rosalía, Bad Bunny, Doja Cat, Cashmere Cat and Missy Elliott winner of the Vanguard Award and more! with surprises of course, as always.

+

@y/n.updates: Genius.com has revealed the lyrics of the new singles! “everytime” and “quit”, the last one is from the dj Cashmere Cat’s album. We are so excited for our baby's return.

@bbcradio1: A friendship you didn’t know you needed until now… Calum Hood from 5sos appears in the track info of Y/N’s new single. Is Y/N going to appear in the upcoming 5sos album too? let’s pray to the universe.

+

“Of course last but not least to arrive the red carpet is the royalty in person, Y/N” the interviewer comments watching you posing to all of the cameras. “I am loving this moment. Y/N is here to slay the red carpet and taking pictures with every artist throwing kisses to friends like to 5sos, ugh lucky boys, now saying hi to Normani, we love that”.

“Yeah, I’m smelling big succes coming this year and Y/N totally deserves it” the other interviewer says. “Oh. My. Goddess… Can we take a moment to appreciate this outfit?!”. You arrive and say hi to everyone. After a couple of questions and compliments you are walking with your team to go backstage to change for your performance.

Once the Teen Wolf cast introduced your performance, everything went dark and silence and you appear in a large lavender satin dress, perfect to build up your figure and Cashmere Cat appears on a platform with his dj set and lights pointing at you and him.

“And you say that I'm the devil you know

And I don't disagree, no, I don't see the harm

They say, "You crazy, just leave him, he'll suffocate you"

But I wanna be in your arms

They say, "No, don't pick up the phone, let him think there's nobody home"

But I'm under your spell

'Cause when you call, my heart starts to roll

I always want more

It's my heaven, my hell…”

Then two contemporary dancers are next to you dancing at what the lyrics means to you when you recorded this with Cashmere Cat in the studio after your breakup. At the chorus a fake rain starts in the stage and you have your moment feeling amazing and feeling the beat that your dj friend was playing behind you. You participate too in the choreo while you sing the last part of the song. Singing to both dancers faces like if you are watching from outside when you decided to step out your relation. So each dancer goes to their own way representing the metaphor.

Then a new different beat went off for a little moment and you start singing a snippet of one of your new songs of your upcoming album hoping to make everyone clear how you are after your breakup because you still hear some comments about it.

“I got a bad idea, How 'bout we take a little bit of time away?

I got a bad idea

Forget about it, yeah, forget about him, yeah”.

The next thing you see is everyone standing up and clapping at you. You hug Cashmere Cat. “Thank you, please give it up for my friend Cashmere Cat!”

You stay not that much to the after party because tomorrow you have to get up early for a photoshoot.

+

You post videos behind the scenes and the photos of the photoshoot. You are in the front page and you did something original playing with makeup, hairstyles and clothes. Everyone is living for this new era.

“Ugh, are you going to do that call or should I do it for you?” Ashton interrupts Calum and his daydreaming watching your latest posts.

“What?” Calum answers confused wrinkling his nose and expressions.

“You heard me”. Ashton says letting know his friend that he is not stupid. “I noticed how you look at Y/N that night performing and then at the after party...And don’t excuse yourself because of the angelic voice because I know I was mesmerized too but you were on another level”.

Calum doesn’t add anything else and stands up to continue writing the new song but not without leaving a comment on one of your posts ‘gorg!’.

+

“Hello beautiful human, it is Y/N back in the studio!” Zach says through his microphone. Everyone clap and he greets you. Even the promo you have to do for your singles, albums and all that stuff you are so picky with the interviews you want to do because in the past you had a lot of uncomfortable ones with disrespectful questions and interviewers. It is not the case with Zach, you feel at home and he is your friend.

As always you talked about your new music, upcoming things, opinions about something, your personal life and you are so honest talking on Zach’s show because he always asks you about how are you doing because he knows that everyone struggles.

“So the whole tracklist it is on genius.com and I think that it is safe to say that I’m not the only one surprised with the collabs and people who helped you.” Zach says reading a paper checking the new revelation. “I would like to know details how it is to work with such talented artists and producers”.

You told him the details and including how Calum ended in your studio session that night.

“Thank God I recognized him because my bodyguard was ready to punch him” you make Zach laughs.

+

Calum saw your interview and after that he called you. He didn’t know what kind of confidence took him to invite you to hang out tomorrow.

That day you went with him and Ashton and Luke to the Star Wars theme park. The guys insisted that Calum must have gone alone that day but he was too nervous. Other day you and the guys went to bowling, Michael was losing all the fun because his new life as fiancé planning the wedding.

That’s how you got the chance to know more about them every single time you hang out. Paparazzis always were there and people talking about this cool friendship. But then Calum had the balls to ask you on a date. For your surprise he invited you to a The 1975 concert, then you invited him to a Post Malone concert, you went to the movies, then late nights stops at diners. And as the bond between you two was growing with so much love, affection, confidence, honesty and how safe you feel next to him you didn’t realize that you were holding his hand or arm so natural like it was a thing you two always do. That little thing was enough for people to start rumors. Calum likes you so much but he wanted to take things slow because of you and him after you told him everything about your ex and he did the same. His ex used him just for fame and to be in the public eye so with little details when you noticed he was doubting about his own self or anything else, you let him know that everything is okay.

+

One and a half month later, you are with him at your place in your home studio after you order vegan pizza for dinner that Calum was right that it is delicious. You were helping each other, mostly him with ideas of sets to perform Want You Back and Youngblood on tv shows. Then you showed him the final version of ‘everytime’ and he loves that you included the laugh in the song which reminds him of something. 

“I want to show you something” Calum says searching something on his phone gallery. 

“Found it” he says getting his chair closer to yours. It is a video that he secretly recorded of that day in the studio, when you finally hit the high notes of the song. In the video you can hear how he says ‘wow” multiple times and your producer is not surprised but still in awe. Then there is your laugh when you saw Calum’s face and when the song ends you can hear his ‘what the fu-” and the video ended.

https://www.instagram.com/p/B8O76_nC3Q5/

“Why you didn’t show me this before?” you say with giggles at how incredible you have the two sides of that moment.

“First, don’t worry because I’m never going to show this to anyone I know that I should ask you before and-” he is explaining himself.

“Can I kiss you?” you interrupts looking at him noticing a sparkly surprise on his eyes.

He leans so fast to kiss you, you take your moment to taste his lips after all this time you can confirm what you think about his lips. You break the kiss needing air. “You didn’t answer my question”. 

He laughs at your teasing while you bit your lip. “You’re right, I didn’t”. He holds your face within his hands and start kissing every part of your face while he says “Yes” in every little kiss.

Things got hot and heavy so you move the make out session to your room. Both of you don’t want that the other person feel pressure to do things but with you Calum forgot his “love is scam” thing. So he carries you and takes his time to make every moment, kiss, thrust and this night to last. He thinks that he is the only one that kinda feels strange at this amount with affection and intimacy but the truth is that you were feeling the same way, because with him you don’t feel a clingy or a needy person as you were in your last relationship. With Calum is different in a good way.

+

“So you didn’t come home last night” Ashton says to Calum when he arrived for lunch time, because he had breakfast twice today with you.

“Ew! I didn’t want to know that Cal” Ashton says while cutting vegetables for lunch. “Thank God you are together, it took you forever. To be honest, I thought Y/N was going to get bored of waiting”. 

+

Another night at your place when Calum surprised you with a romantic dinner and also apologizing for the other night when at his place Ashton interrupts you two.

In the middle of the night you woke up with an idea stuck in your head, you took your underwear and Calum’s baggy shirt he was wearing and before you stood up you melted at the sight of your dog sleeping closely to Calum, who at first hated him but now they look like besties.

After an hour in your studio with this new idea, you had the lyrics and already recording with a beat which two of your best friends made once in a party just fooling. The studio is soundproof and in another level of your house so the music is not going to wake up Calum, but the coldness he felt next to him makes him wonder the reason that woke you up.

And when he found where you are and what are you doing he reminds to himself that in this exact moment he feels so much love for you.

“That sounds beautiful babe” he said getting closer to you to kiss your cheek.

You are editing all focused this song to send it to your producer to do the final touches. “I didn’t want to wake you up” you lift your head to look at him with a pout and noticing he is shirtless and he looks tired from what you did hours earlier. He asked you details about this song called ‘goodnight n go’, he listened to it and once again all of his feelings manifest in a studio. “I love you” he confessed when the song ends. The feeling is mutual and the idea of this song came up all based in your relation you have with him.

+

@Y/N: new album. valentine’s day. love y’all xoxo. 

You posted with the cover of your new album.

+

“There is a lot of people downstairs” your manager said arriving the room, you were waiting for your manager for the first toast of the night. It is your album’s launch party and you want to celebrate with your team, your band and their loved ones. Your family, your friends, artists of the industry, and other famous people.

You made a speech about how grateful you are for everyone in the room for their patience, for the love and support for you and this new project. Before you start to get emotional, you said to everyone to have fun tonight and you thanked again. 

You rented a whole club for the night. After eating, cut the cake and having a few glasses of champagne you are ready to take pictures in the photo booth with everyone.

Your close loved ones of course know about you and Cal, but the other half of the people in the room just know the rumors and the pictures from paparazzis and fans. When you were taking funny pictures with other musicians, it is iconic that in the photo is going to appear artist from different genres of music that are your friends. Calum really wants a picture with you and just you even when he loved the ones with the boys and your friends.

“I’m ready” Calum said to you when you are pointing at the printed photo because Luke’s gold eyeshadow looks freaking amazing.

“Ready for what?” you looked at him confused.

“Ready to announce the world that we are together” he said biting his lower lip waiting for your reaction. He told you a few weeks before that he was afraid and he didn’t know how to handle at that moment if you said you were together, so you told him that it is okay and understood him.

“Like now?! What you have in mind?” you asked him nervous because you both know what comes next with this kind of announcements. 

Calum just took your hand and enter just with you inside the photo booth and when the countdown started he looks at you with a smirk and sparkly eyes. “This is my plan” and he kissed you on the lips at the same time the machine announced the picture was taken.

“We have two more! What do we do?” he asked you, but now that you are here you use right the last two pictures. One kissing him in the cheek and hugging him around his neck that Calum did that thing with his eyes and the biggest smile on his face because he is so happy and also the alcohol. And the last one looks a little bit blurry and funny.

You took the opportunity to take another three but this time, now that everyone is going to know about your relation, the pictures are sexier but not vulgar. Of course your photographer took film pictures during the night so you will have several memories of the night.

You and Calum posted the three first ones on your social media.

@Y/N: my love💖.

@calumhood: happiest man in the universe. february 14th is not bad at all anymore with you by my side💛.

That night before you arrived home with Calum, he told you about a new 5sos music video called Valentine that was going to be on Youtube in 30 minutes, he told you that he wrote almost the entire song and you can’t wait to hear and see him singing this song, especially his verse.

We know we're classic together like Egyptian gold

We love us

+

The success of your new album was immediately. And that means a lot of interviews, invitations to tv shows, radio stations, youtube channels, etc. Calum went and waited for you backstage to the ones that were in US. But the international ones he couldn’t come with you because their new album is going to release soon and new music videos by 5sos.

“I’m so happy to be back!” you said. Today is BBC radio 1 turn. They told you they were happy to have you in the radio.

After you sang a song from the new album, you have to do a cover. In the past you did ‘Them Changes’ by Thundercat and ‘After The Storm’ by Kali Uchis taking advantage of your voice and the high notes you can reach, it is the same this time.

“Hi, this is Get You by my friends Daniel Caesar and Kali Uchis” you said. The last part is your favorite.

This feels like summer

Boy you make me feel so alive

Just be my lover

Boy you'll lead me to paradise

+

Youngblood is out and the release party wasn’t bigger like yours but the fun was the same. You appeared on the Cocktail Chats they did when it was Valentine’s turn. Now after two months your relation went public, the euphoria coming from the people decreased.

+

@Y/N: something huge in two hours with a special guest.

You posted on your stories with a sneak peek.

@ctrlnow: Y/N’s world tour with Kehlani as special guest. Next week tickets on sale. Are you excited? because this is going to be 🔥. It is the first time Y/N is going to perform in all the continents in almost two years.

+

@5sos: US, Canada and Mexico get ready for this tour. Special guest our buddy Dominic Fike. Tickets on sale in 6 days.

+

After 4 months of rehearsals and planning visuals, outfits, makeup, sets, tracklist, etc. You are on the road with the first leg of the tour in US for the whole summer in arenas and festivals. You are synchronized with Calum so you have no problem to hang out together and enjoy to the fullest your days off. 

Both of you don’t get tired of each other concerts. Watching Calum leaving his heart on stage singing and playing his bass, also looking so freaking handsome every single show. For him is the same watching your amazing show with your dancers and different outfits, he said it before and in the present day that he can listen to you singing the whole day and he envies you how charming you are with your fans and noticing every person in the huge arena.

You have a main stage, then a circular runway and a B stage. Calum is always in the first row in front of the B stage. The first show you were so nervous. The beginning of ‘goodnight n go’ started and the crowd went crazy. 

“It seems that you really like this one” you said teasing even more. You started dancing and walking next to where Calum is. Your dancers interact with the audience while you are reaching the high notes. 

We'll have drinks and talk about things

And any excuse to stay awake with you

And you'd sleep here, I'd sleep there

But then the heating may be down again

(At my convenience)

We'd be good, we'd be great together

https://www.instagram.com/p/B577uVJnJ6f/ 

When you looked down, there is your boyfriend looking at you like nobody else did before. You laughed at his reaction because it was priceless and before you keep moving you blow him a kiss. So as the same his reaction was that first time in the studio with ‘everytime’ that made you laugh, now it is with the song that he inspired. He does that in every show he goes, every time you sing ‘goodnight n go’. It is now your amulet that he makes you laugh in the same part with his faces and reactions. But not everything is perfect.

+

The different time zones, the distance and the stress is clouding Calum’s mind. In two weeks you have barely spoken ten minutes. And new things keep coming to you like singing to fashion shows, summer festivals in other continents, hosting tv shows, etc. His friends told him that he will get used to and things will be okay within you two. But he misses you so much and he is doubting about himself again in this thing called love.

“I think it is the best Y/N” he said through his phone. He called you that night, he is so overwhelmed and tired. “I don’t want to be an obstacle, this is your career’s biggest time” he tries not to cry while he passed his hand through his hair all nervous.

“Calum please tell me you are not joking” he can hear your sobs in the other side of the line. You are in France and he is in Canada.

“Y/N just look at what time you are calling me! It is 4 am here where I am!” he said frustrated, it is not the first fight but it is the first time he yells at you that loud.

“Okay I’m sorry! It is late here too Calum in New Zealand- my point is that we will be okay Calum. After this I’m going to be home like you” you tried to calm him.

“And then what? Run to film a tv show for a whole week? Just seeing you at nights? We should take a break while we figured it out” he said and you are frozen trying to check if what he said is real.

“You are the only one who needs to figured it out, because I’m sure about us and… How could you even wonder and said that you are an obstacle?”. Now it is the opposite because the last thing you said was “Okay, if it is what you want. Go to sleep n’ goodnight”.

+

You don’t know how people could know. But rumors of your relationship are in every social media and it is just been a day. You want to throw your phone but you have to get ready for your show in Australia, what an ironic thing.

It is not the same hype when the beginning of ‘goodnight n go’ started. When you are singing the bridge that you were used to laugh thanks to Calum’s reactions. Now your voice breaks and hide your face with your hand and the other one holding your microphone so the public keep singing because you can’t. Your dancers changed the choreo to get close to you and let you know that they are there for you but still you start singing again in the next chorus but with a shaky voice. With this people confirms the rumors.

@enews: Our favorite couple is not longer a thing. With this we don’t believe in love. Y/N and Calum Hood are taking a break. Days before the couple had some troubles in tour. Y/N broke in tears and Calum didn’t go to any interview. Link of the video of Y/N last show in the bio.

+

“I supposed that you already saw this” Luke said giving his phone to Calum to show a video someone posted on Instagram. It is from your last night show.

“Yeah, I saw it” he said without making eye contact with his friend. Calum doesn’t want to talk about it. He is trying to convince himself that what he did is the best. It breaks his heart watching the video that now it is everywhere and his bandmates noticed how irritated he is with everything.

+

For a whole week Calum barely sleep two hours at nights. He looked off in the shows. He cries during his part in ‘Ghost Of You’, he sings spiritless in ‘Valentine’ and he asked to take off ‘Babylon’ from the tracklist. 

5sos have new dates in another continents after December holidays.

“You should talk to Y/N, the Asia leg is going to be over in ten days and after the holidays the South America leg starts” Michael gave his advice to Calum but once again he didn’t give any answer.

+

You took ‘goodnight n go’ and ‘everytime’ off from the tracklist and changed it for another song because you tried a couple of shows after but you couldn’t do it like it used to be singing that song. Your fans were sad because it is their favorite song but you don’t want to cry every single show. 

You have been in touch with Calum but not much. Just good morning and good night messages and that you are safe in the city you two are in that moment.

+

“Hello Mexico City!” Luke said on stage. “Welcome to the Meet You There tour, thanks for having us tonight, let’s have some fun!”

The whole night Calum were late and off key with his voice and bass that multiple times Ashton tried to follow him with the drums. Calum is thinking and worried about you when he saw earlier that you cancelled your shows in Korea because you got a cold that you have to rest your voice. He just wants to talk to you.

When the show ended, Calum throws his bass hard against the floor without caring a thing. After that he went directly to bed, without taking a shower, or eat something. It is been like this for weeks and everyone knows that what he decided was so stupid, but with hope that he learns the lesson.

“Can you explain us what was that?” Ashton said taking off Calum’s hands his phone. “Dude this is getting out of control, and we gave you your space and everything but now you are going to admit that what you did was wrong and the only thing you want is your relationship back”.

“Go away” Calum said.

“No, Hood. You are barely sleeping, eating, focused, happy. This is how relationships work, and we know that it is crazy as fuck when you are famous”.

“Yeah man, it wasn’t easy for me and my girlfriend” Michael said. “And now we are going to get married...Look, if it is meant to be and if you really love Y/N, you should fix this”.

+

You are back in LA for holidays and tonight you have the last show of the year because the second date of LA you had to cancel it because an allergy you had so you reschedule the show.

You are in the car on your way to the arena when your manager told you to stop by the studio because the new visual that you asked for is ready. It is a recap of this year, so your fans are going to see a couple of unreleased videos and pictures of behind the scenes of this whole year including everything and every person in your life.

In the studio you saw the new visual and you noticed that they didn’t put Calum on it. You love him and even when you are on a break, you wanted him in the visual too.

“Hmm I can explain it” your crew member said when another video randomly start in the screen of the computer.

“A mini film by Andy Deluca” you read in the title. The video shows the different reactions of Calum in every ‘goodnight n go’ performance. not just the tour, it also shows the reactions from his house listening to the song, or watching you performing the song on a show. It is a funny video but at the same time so cute and emotional because his reactions are different in every take. Calum screamed “YAAAAS!” or “I LOVE YOU BABY!”, surprised faces, funny faces, lip-synching, etc. And when Andy pointed the camera at you and you hid your laugh with your hand or sleeve, depends on the outfit. Calum says directly to the camera “Y/N should stop doing that, I’m going to say it later because Y/N’s laugh and smile are gorgeous… Okay this is my favorite song, enjoy it”. And the video ends.

“Wow, this is freaking cool but how did you-?” you asked your team when Calum appears from nowhere that scares you.

“I send it to your manager” he said. “I asked Andy to do this video because as always since the start of our relation I wanted to keep these memories”. When you didn’t say anything, he continues. “Y/N I know that I fucked up everything and-” he is interrupted by your manager telling your team to leave you two alone. Once alone with Calum in the room he continues again. “I got scared, I had never had a real relationship, this connection and what I feel for you before...I’m sorry”.

After a couple of minutes talking and giving your point of view that he didn’t let you give months earlier, you said “I love you, but please talk to me because the solution is not running every time things get complicated” and you hug him. He tried to kiss you but you said that he has to win your heart again.

+

“Hello LA! Hope you enjoy this surprise, happy holidays” and the new visuals and videos start playing in the big screen and everyone is laughing, getting emotional, while you drink water backstage you can hear the “awww cute”. And last but not least Calum’s video is playing and you are ready for the next song. Everyone screamed and are happy for you to be with him again. So when in the video Calum says ‘Okay this is my favorite song, enjoy it’, the beginning of ‘goodnight n go’ started.

Tell me why you gotta look at me that way

You know what it does to me

So baby, what you tryna say? Ayy

Lately, all I want is you on top of me

You know where your hands should be

So baby, won't you come show me? Mmm

“For this next song I would like to call Mister Calum Thomas Hood” you said looking at him. He didn’t know about this. You sat him in a chair and say on his ear “A little tease never hurt nobody babe”. Now talking to the audience, “Let’s go!” and the beat of ‘break up with your girlfriend, i’m bored’ went off. Calum is fighting and struggling when you are dancing in front and on top of him.

+

It’s been 3 years since Calum entered your room. He is so glad that he interrupted your studio session. And here he is now, watching you performing ‘goodnight n go’ like if it was the first time he heard you that night in your home studio, the feeling and the amount of love to you is the same and even bigger he would say, it just changes the place where you are singing this song. Now you don’t hide your laugh with your sleeve, and Calum always says how he feels and trusts in your relationship.

#calum hood blurb #calum hood fic #calum hood imagine #calum hood au #calum hood x reader #calum blurb #calum fic #calum imagine #calum au #calum x reader #goodnight n go #5sos blurb #5sos fic #5sos imagine #5sos au #5 seconds of summer blurb #5 seconds of summer fic #5 seconds of summer imagine #5 seconds of summer au #calum #calum hood #5sos #5 seconds of summer #blurb #fic #imagine #au #5sos fam

[aion-rsa]

The Simpsons Season 32 Episode 17 Review: Uncut Femmes

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

This The Simpsons review contains spoilers.

The Simpsons Season 32 Episode 17

The Simpsons Season 32, episode 17, ” Uncut Femmes,” is a caper comedy, and criminals Sarah Wiggum (Megan Mullally) and Fat Tony (Joe Mantegna) steal every scene they are in. Over the course of the jewel heist parody at the center of the installment, we learn Chief Wiggum’s wife has a shady past, and the neighborhood mob boss has a paternal presence. They don’t have any scenes together, but they make crime pay off, and prove two or so wrongs can make a right.

“Oh, my hallway-walking God,” the episode opens, as a workplace atrocity leads to a nondisclosure agreement which results in two front-row seats at a Bob Seger concert. The rock star plays himself, but goes against the wind. Yes, this is the Silver edition of his Bullet Band, but when he learns both Homer and Chief Wiggum dumped an overnight field trip with the kids on their wives to make the show, he feels obliged to remind them: a wife, like rock and roll, never forgets. Who knew a Detroit belter like Seger could throw such guilt?

The trip is to a World War II battleship, retrofitted to look like it did back in May 1943. That was the last time it was scrubbed, and the kids and wives get keelhauled into breaking up everything but the barnacles. They swab the decks and are told they’re killing Oxees, which sounds enough like Nazis for Springfield Elementary. Nick Offerman voices Captain Bowditch, who Sarah Wiggum calls Captain Dingdong before robbing his liquor cabinet and sharing a bottle with Marge.  

The police chief’s wife also shares some unexpectedly relatable problems, like the pressures of being married to “a man with a dangerous job he’s just not good at” But her best comic line is about her husband’s health, and how every slice of cheese could be his last. The bonding scene is very effective, warm and witty. Both women give up so much because they are mothers.

Sarah Wiggum gave up a glitzy and glamorous life of crime, like the Ocean’s 8 masterminds. She was the getaway driver on the famed “Hourglass Diamond” heist. Her story is broken down in a flashback sequence with subtitles like “The Grab,” “The Camaraderie,” and “The Double Cross.” To give historical perspective, one of the items which the young thieves steal, while listening to Gwen Stefani’s “Hollaback Girl,” are MP3 players which held over 300 songs. 

In the segment entitled “The Honey Pot,” Sarah explains her own role in the robbery. “The Chump” denotes when she met Clancy Wiggum, then a mere security guard, working his way through one of his many attempts at passing the police academy. “I love a man in a rented uniform,” she says. 

Marge had to miss the one event she gets to share with her sisters’ friends, which includes the crumbs of the crème de la crème of Springfield’s LGBTQ community: Watching the annual Gen Gala on TV and making scathing remarks. Marge is jonesing for snark. She’s got an itch to throw good shade. This would be a blast to hear from Marge, who is “still working up the courage to call a man the B word.” This year’s Gala is themed, “The Audacity.” The prior year was called “The Nerve.  Marge breaks her usual reserve to tell Rihanna she listens “to the clean versions of all your songs.”

Marge is so consistently Marge-like, so clearly defined within the vantage point the series has set up for her. Marge’s first words, when trying to start a conversation with Sarah, are “the top 10 ways of starting a conversation.” When she is kidnapped, she observes whoever had the bag over their face before her was a smoker. Julie Kavner also pulls off amazing physical comedy in this episode, even though it’s vocal acrobatics. When Marge is bound by Sarah’s old gang, she hops away – chair, pole and all – to allow them to scheme. She points to their scheme-board with her high mound of hair, which she later uses to blur surveillance cameras. Kavner’s inquisitive or insistent moans fuel every blue follicle.

To distract the mark, Lindsey Naegle, Marge makes small talk about common household chores the VIP would never do herself, like paying attention to whether you switch delicates to extra warm when you’re doing laundry. “You’re not famous, so you don’t exist,” Lindsey, who pocketed the diamond for herself to buy a celebrity lifestyle, snorts at Marge. Her husband, Springfield’s beloved Rainier Luftwaffe Wolfcastle, takes this gag to an absurd conclusion. Wolfcastle has no idea what the two were talking about when he enters the scene, but he is more blinded by his celebrity. He asks his wife why she’s talking to an empty chair. It’s all a punchline which lands on “somebody stop those nobodies,” a masterful twist of social restraint.

Ultimately, one of the snarkiest lines turns out to be a comment on Marge, when she makes a very surprising appearance at the Gala. But only because “she looks like dirt” walking a red carpet designed for 20 plus-size gladiators to carry Beyoncé. The snide aside comes across as exactly what Marge would’ve wanted.

The episode has plenty of successful throwaway sight gags. Homer closes shop at his post at the nuclear plant with the same kind of cage storefronts lock up with after hours. We’re not sure if this means the workers on the other side are locked in the workspace without emergency supervision for the whole weekend, though.

The kidnapping is first reported by Chief Wiggum’s son, Ralph, who was watch commander on deck. Fat Tony will come to be simpatico with Ralph in hysterically edgy ways later in the episode. They both “know nothing about nothing.” Until he met Ralph, Fat Tony thought putting crumbled Oreos on ice cream would be redundant, but now finds it transcendent. It is like a grooming process; the police chief’s son even begins wearing a matching fur coat. And when a kid behind an ice cream counter tells Ralph not to grab at the Gummy Bears, Fat Tony says “if the boy wants this the boy wants to smooch, the boy will spook smooch.” He could be telling The Bronx Tale. Ralph’s rejoinder, “I love you, scary daddy,” is so in keeping with his character of cluelessly deranged innocence.

When Homer and Wiggum first learn their wives are missing, the police chief immediately blames Fat Tony. The reputed, reported, alleged and convicted crime boss is plainly being honest when he says he would never even consider such a crime. First of all, how would he finish the sentence “it would be a shame if something were to happen to?” 

Wiggum is very important to crime in the town. This episode points out how it flourishes under his lazy watchful eye. Fat Tony loves “Chief Bungles” because he’s a horrible cop. Even Sarah admits her husband is “better at planting evidence than finding it.” But, more importantly to Fat Tony, the chief loves the top cop because he is a selfish man. He’s on the take from Burns, Fat Tony, and we know from past episodes he’s in on schemes with Mayor Quimby. But some things, even a cartoon mob boss cannot forget.

Fat Tony is surprisingly woke in his off hours. It’s the espresso. His men only yell respectful innuendoes at attractive women. The boss not only tutors Homer and Clancy on ways to respect their wives, but takes care of Ralphie while he lets the men fix their marriages. The male gaze is all over this episode, and it gets poked in the eye repeatedly. From WWII books to gender-trading action movie remakes. The real Silver bullet is the truth. Seger’s concert T-shirt is actually a list of things he has to get done to keep his marriage happy, including getting a C-PAP for his snoring.

For Homer, this change is as sweet as a donut, the ordeal makes him notice what Marge looks like when she’s happy. Clancy realizes, for the first time in his long career, that there is a museum in town. At their heart, Homer and the Chief are really only paying attention to their wives for themselves. Oh, and for Bob Seger, they did promise him that. The lesson they learn when confronted with their selfish ways is: “it’s all about us.”

The final part of the scheme earns its subtitle as the exact kind of surprise double revenge twist we have come to expect from this genre. The only difference is what kind of spin the parody will take. Things have a special way of falling on The Simpsons. In a classic early episode, Homer took a memorable tumble down the rocky edges of a cliff in a failed daredevil stunt. So, he knows to get out of the way when Lindsey comes tumbling down the stairs at the Gala. She tumbles long enough for Wolfcastle to find a newer, younger, more trophy of a wife. In real life the fall would have killed her, and Marge would feel terrible. Thank god for animation. Kids, don’t try this at home.

“This isn’t about the cash, it’s about righting a wrong and looking damn good doing it,” Sarah convincingly explains when she lays out the premise of the heist. By the end, Marge declares it “best field trip of my freaking life,” which is what the episode seems to be going for. It’s fun, more fun than most school trips, and it teaches a lesson.

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“Uncut Femmes” is a fun and playful movie satire. It captures the suspense, romance, glamour and pace of a heist film, but puts The Simpsons touch on it. Marge shines in the unexpected, manages to clean house at the same time, and brings Homer into an understanding. The crooks get away with it, and nothing will change. Like so many crimes in Springfield, it’s got Chief Wiggum on the case, and that’s like having no one at all.

The post The Simpsons Season 32 Episode 17 Review: Uncut Femmes appeared first on Den of Geek.

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[makistar2018]

Inside Taylor Swift's Personal Diary Entries: Read All of the Biggest Revelations

By Tomás Mier August 24, 2019

Photo: DIA DIPASUPIL/GETTY

Lover of Diaries

Fans got an inside look at some of Taylor Swift’s most personal thoughts when they bought the deluxe version of her new album, Lover.

Along with some behind-the-scenes recordings, each album featured a 30-page booklet with excerpts from her personal diaries — some even from she was just 13!

“I’ve written about pretty much everything that’s happened to me. I’ve written my original lyrics in those diaries, just feelings,” she said on an Instagram Live announcing the booklets. “It’s everything from pictures drawn, photos of that time in my life, I used to like tape stuff in my diaries.”

Here are the top 10 takeaways from her personal diary entries.

Photo: CHRISTOPHER POLK/GETTY 

Swift the Lyricist

If the diary entries are filled with anything, it’s a deep dive into her song lyrics.

“Red” was born on a long flight — and everyone she played it for loved it.

“Its [sic] so different than anything we’ve done,” she wrote in 2011. “I can’t even tell you how alive and worthwhile I feel when I’m writing a new song and I finish it and people like it. It’s the most fulfilling feeling, like getting an A+ on your report card.”

The diaries also share early versions of “All Too Well” and songs like “Long Live,” “White Horse,” “Holy Ground” and “This Love.”

In a 2014 entry, she writes about the creation of her ultra-hit “Shake It Off.”

“The best way I know how to describe it is that the chorus just fell out of the sky,” she wrote in 2014.

“We all went home and I wrote the first and second verses and brought them in the next day. We wrote this chanty cheer leader bridge that I absolutely LOVE,” she continued.

As for the album cover that would accompany “Shake It Off,” she wrote that she “saw it within 10 seconds.”

“The craziest moment came when something caught my eye. The cover photo is photo 13. I kid you not,” she wrote about the polaroid cover to 1989, which she accompanied with a sketch.

Photo:  HENRY LAMB/BEI/REX/SHUTTERSTOCK

A Glamorous Gala

In a diary entry, Swift writes about being invited to “this event called ‘The Met Gala.’”

To an 18-year-old Swift, that day was “THE party of the year.”

“The paps started SCREAMING for me. It was crazy,” she wrote in May 2008. “We made our way up the red carpet, posing for everyone. All of the women looked so glamorous in their gowns.”

Along with meeting Anna Wintour, George Clooney, Julia Roberts and Giorgio Armani at the event, she wrote that “models stood as decorations, standing still and wearing gorgeous gowns.”

Once inside, she lists “every celebrity ever created” at the event, including Scarlett Johansson, Tom Brady, Beyoncé, Victoria Beckham, Tom Cruise and Jon Bon Jovi “who called me over to talk to him.”

Photo: LARRY BUSACCA/GETTY 

Borchetta's Beginnings

Weeks before the release of Lover, a public feud involving Swift and her old label Big Machine made headlines when the label’s founder Scott Borchetta sold the label (and ownership of her masters) to Scooter Braun.

But years before, Swift had nothing but kind things to say about the label founder who signed her.

After meeting with Capitol Records and not being offered “the deal I would want,” she met with Borchetta — and left with feelings of excitement.

“I really loved all the stuff he said in the meeting, and he stayed for the whole Bluebird show,” she wrote in November 2014. “And he’s SO passionate about this project. I think that’s the way we’re gonna go, I want to surround myself with passionate people.”

A meeting with Borchetta also made “Sparks Fly” as she came up with the name of her second album.

“We were talking about the record and I had this epiphany,” she wrote in April 2010. “I didn’t talk in interviews about how I felt about much of what has happened in the last two years. I’ve been silent about so much that I’m saying on this album. It’s time to Speak Now.”

“Scott freaked out. He loved it,” she wrote in April 2010. “We have a title, ladies and gentlemen!”

Photo: SPLASH 

"The Hunters Will Always Outnumber Me"

Swift also opens up about the lack of privacy that comes with being a celebrity — and how she’ll never get used to seeing “a group of people staring, amassed outside my house, pointing, camera phones up…”

“They could never imagine how much that feels like being hunted,” she wrote.

Swift compares her “mostly perfect life” to “being a tiger in a wildlife enclosure.”

“It’s pretty in there, but you can’t get out,” she described in the August 2013 note.

“No matter how big my house is or how many albums I sell, I’m still going to be the rabbit,” she added. “Because the hunters will always outnumber me. The spectators will stand by, shaking their heads, going ‘that poor girl.’ But the point is, they’re still watching. Everyone loves a good hunt.”

But her feelings about being “hunted” also translated into worrying about her generation’s obsession with taking photos “so that they can spend all day checking the comments underneath.”

“They will never truly experience a moment without attempting to capture it and own it,” she wrote, comparing pulling a flower from the ground to take photos. “Nevermind that picking a flower kills it, the same way taking a picture of a moment can ruin it altogether.”

Swift has notably kept comments off of her post to improve her mental health.

“I’m training my brain to not need the validation of someone telling me that I look 🔥🔥🔥,” she wrote in Elle. “I’m also blocking out anyone who might feel the need to tell me to ‘go die in a hole ho’ while I’m having my coffee at nine in the morning.”

Photo: AL MESSERSCHMIDT/GETTY

From Fearful to "Fearless"

Though Swift is now known for her jaw-dropping stage presence, as a young singer she wrote that she would “get stage fright every time I walk onto a stage.”

“I wish it wasn’t so, but I can’t blame my mind for freaking out about performances,” she wrote in 2010, days before releasing Speak Now. “Criticism of my performances has been the biggest source of pain in my life.”

“I sometimes feel like my college degree is in acting like I’m ok when I’m not,” wrote a 20-year-old Swift.

But even as a burgeoning singer at just 13, she would get hate while on stage. During one performance, her guitar pick broke in half and fell while she was playing.

“There was this huge silence! It was awful! I had to bend over and pick it up in front of everyone!” she wrote next to the broken pick. “And while I was singing, this guy was shouting stuff like, ‘Go on, b*#@! Sing that country bulls#*%! Go on motherf—!.’ It was awful.”

Photo: SCOTT GRIES/GETTY IMAGES

Done with Dieting

In her diaries, she also candidly writes about sticking to a diet as a teen.

Soon after Thanksgiving 2006, she returned to Nashville to her “own comfy bed” and planned to go out to eat with her best friend Abigail Anderson during a day off.  

“Oh and I’m dieting again,” she wrote right after.

“Over the holidays I didn’t watch what I ate and man its [sic] so weird how fast I can gain or lose weight… It’s crazy,” she ended the note. “So I’m going to lose some now.”

Earlier this year, she wrote about finally being okay with gaining weight.

“I learned to stop hating every ounce of fat on my body,” she wrote in Elle. “I worked hard to retrain my brain that a little extra weight means curves, shinier hair, and more energy.”

The “Daylight” singer also said that she’s constantly working on her body image.

“I think a lot of us push the boundaries of dieting, but taking it too far can be really dangerous. There is no quick fix,” she said. “I work on accepting my body every day.”

Photo: CHRISTOPHER POLK/GETTY IMAGES

"I'ma Let You Finish, But..."

“Ahh… the things that can change in a week…” wrote Swift in a Sept. 18, 2009 journal entry.

Five days had passed since Kanye West crashed Swift’s Video of the Year acceptance speech at the MTV Video Music Awards, but the whole ordeal was all she — and everyone else — could think about.

“If you had told me that one of the biggest stars in music was going to jump up onstage and announce that he thought I shouldn’t have won on live television, I would’ve said ‘That stuff doesn’t really happen in real life,’” she wrote.

“Well… apparently…. It does,” she ended the note.

Little did 19-year-old Swift know that West would cause more tumult in her life seven years later. In an August 2016 note, she simply wrote, “This summer is the apocalypse.”

The “apocalyptic” summer came when West referred to the singer as “that bitch”in his track “Famous” and featured a nude version of the “Shake It Off” singer in its accompanying video.

Then, Swift said she never approved of the lyric after his wife Kim Kardashianleaked a phone call conversation between the two singers.

“Being falsely painted as a liar when I was never given the full story or played any part of the song is character assassination,” she wrote then. That “Cruel Summer” ordeal would go on to inspire her sixth album, reputation.

Photo:  SPLASH NEWS

A Joe Alwyn “Love Story”

Like in Lover’s lyrics, Swift doesn’t hold back about her deep feelings for boyfriend Joe Alwyn in her personal diary.

Clearly writing about Alwyn, the singer confessed about wanting to keep their relationship under wraps as much as possible.

“I’m essentially based in London, hiding out trying to protect us from the nasty world that just wants to ruin things,” she wrote in a January 2017 note. “We have been together and no one has found out for 3 months now. I want it to stay that way because I don’t want anything about this to change or become too complicated or intruded upon.”

“But it’s senseless to worry about someday not being happy when I am happy now,” she concluded. “OK. Breathe.”

But Swift wasn’t always so sure about love being real — especially when it came to Valentine’s Day.

“I somehow feel like it’s my destiny to roll my eyes at happy couples and resent Valentine’s Day. I also feel like I’m the girl before ‘the one.’ I’m not ‘the one,’” she wrote at 19. “I’m the girl you think is the one for you, and when it doesn’t work out with me, you meet the next girl and realize she IS the one.”

And as a mere 13 year old, she imagined the first time she’d have her first kiss — and about being “such a romantic.”

“I just dream about looking into someone’s eyes and feeling something I’ve never felt before, you know?” she wrote. “I just never was able to put a face to my fantacy [sic]. But something tells me that my first kiss is really far away from happening!”

Photo:  LARRY BUSACCA/WIREIMAGE

The Night Before...

Before the 2014 Grammy Awards, Swift was confident her album Red would take home the biggest award of the night.

“It’s the middle of the night and I was at the Clive Davis party tonight which means… the Grammys are tomorrow,” she wrote. “Never have I felt so good about our chances. Never have I wanted something so badly as I want to hear them say ‘Red’ is the Album of the Year.”

Though she was up for four awards that year, Swift would head home empty handed.

Though she had won that award two years prior with Fearless, it wouldn’t be until her 2014 album 1989 that she’d take home the coveted prize again. In her 13-year career, Swift has won 10 Grammys from 32 nominations.

Photo:  MICHAEL LOCCISANO/FILMMAGIC

“This Might Be Worth Money Someday”

Though her diary entries are filled with some insight into the more complicated times in her life, the entries also feature some cute memories of her youth — including her middle school class schedule, some song lyrics and memories about listening to Sugarland for the first time.

Accompanied by drawings and the number 13, in her first journal entry, she signs her name and writes “(That could be worth money someday!! Just kidding hehe).”

Under “Journal #1,” a 13-year-old Swift writes a poem: “The world is as big as you make it / Never be shameful to fly / When a chance comes you should take it / May you never be scared of goodbye…”

After performing at a school talent show, Swift wrote: “I ❤ SCHOOL!”

Reminiscing on the grand day, Swift wrote, “I got a standing ovation and everything.”

People

#taylor swift #lover #ts7 #diary #2019.08.24

[singingpeople]

Paying the price

Chapter 5

There are a few things Lexi hasn’t told anyone…what you can see in this chapter!!  I hope you like how the story goes! :)  I actually wanted Dante to be a lot more like Four, but he seems to have a mind of his own :D The next chapter I write will be another Eric one, but this story will be a lot longer, so I wrote two chapters, instead of switching like usually :)

@pathybo @jojuarez26 @love17mwh @jaiboomer11 @tigpooh67 @bookwarm85

 If Dante thought he would catch me of guard with having to wake up so early, he wasn’t in the least successful. Eventhough I went to bed around 12 am last night, I woke up again at 4 am, panting heavily. I shot up in the unfamiliar bed, my unconsciousness ripping me out of the nightmare, before it came to the best part. Groaning, I turned around again.

Sarcasm so early in the day isn’t good for me.

 The only good thing about me not speaking was, that I wasn’t screaming in my sleep. But even so, it was only a matter of time, till someone would find me trashing in my sleep, trying to murder someone with my bedsheets.

Gotta love dorms...

 Not wanting to lie around in bed, analyzing my nightmare and reliving the memory, just because it was such fun, like I usually would at home, I got up pretty quickly and after a lukewarm shower, I was on my way to the mess hall.

 Since most dauntless had celebrated the arrival of the initiates with lots of alcohol, the cafeteria was mostly empty, with the exception of the members, that had to be on patrol in a few hours.

And even those looked like they had stayed up all night, with the way they were holding their Styrofoam cups filled with coffee, as if it was a life saver.

For some it surely was.

 Grabbing myself a cup and a bit of oatmeal, I wasn’t really hungry, but knew I had to eat something, before working out for at least eight hours.

So I forced the disgusting pap down, eventhough it was slimy.

Cafeteria food could be really repulsive.

It almost made me miss Mom´s cooking.

.

.

.

When Dante found me in the training room after seven, mind me, he was late, I was already warmed up and had been jogging at a leisure pace for over an hour.

For any other person, the lack of sleep combined with the physical activity, would have been gruesome, but I was used to it. Any time I wanted to get my mind of things, I worked out, no matter the hour.

No matter how tired I was.

It wasn’t even unusual for me to fall asleep on the matts in the storage room, because I couldn’t bother walking home for 20 minutes, after my legs failed me, because I had been doing suicides and sprints for hours at time.

Or maybe it was the change of scenery, that helped me fall asleep. Away from the concerned eyes of my mother and the helpless ones of my father, that turned to frustration, I could forget everything for a while and fall asleep easier.

Or at all, if you see it that way.

 “You´re early.” Dante said, his gaze raking over my sweating form, a huge bag in hand. Shooting a pointed luck at the clock, I raised my eyebrows at my instructor. Seeing the time, Dante grinned sheepishly at me, only shrugging his shoulders. He walked over to the table, that stood on one side of the training room, taking out water bottles.

“I´m your instructor. I´m allowed to be late.” He said, as he turned around, throwing a bottle at me.  

Caught off guard, I just barely managed to catch the bottle with the tips of my fingers, happy it didn’t smack into my face. The glare I shot him in thanks, didn’t faze him at all.

No matter, what I seemed to do, Dante always shrugged my stand-offish behavior off, never getting mad at me. He seemed to have the patience of a saint, at least when it came to me, which was strange, because I enraged most people.

Dante was always calm, except the one time he tried to explain me, that he wouldn’t take advantage of me.

I snorted at the memory. As if he would´ve been able to.

 I brushed the hair out of my face, that was slightly sweat stricken, before tilting my head back and taking a big gulp out of the water bottle. That object could have caused my first injury in initiation, which would have been pitiful, if you ask me.

Dad´s main advice while training, I had to listen to for years, was, to always stay hydrated and I usually followed this rule.

His other ones… not so much.

From the corner of my eye, I saw Dante watching me, trying to be inauspicious about it. If I would have been Cat or one of her sluts, I would have given him a show, by pouring the rest of the bottle over myself. But I was neither interested in trying to be appear sexy, which I was not, nor in walking around wet for the rest of the morning.

I´m just talking about my shirt here, even if his back muscles seemed to sing for me, like sirens to the sailors.

And judging from the way my sister gushed over him, I wasn’t the only one with those urges.

 “How long have you been in here?” Dante asked with a sideway glance at me, while I helped him set up the bottles on the table. Shrugging my shoulders, I went to grab another bottle, but a hand on my wrist stopped me. Looking up, the worried look on Dante´s face, made something inside me churn and I wasn’t able to rip away my hand, like I normally would have. Turning me towards him, he went on.

“I´m serious. I caught you around eleven thirty, last night. Did you sleep at all?”

 I shot him a look, that screamed for him, to mind his own business, before prying his hand away from my arm and returning to my task. It really wasn’t something he should bother with and I was just here to help him.

Not that I think Dante would care, because why should he?

We´re not friends and there is certainly no one, that worries about me getting enough rest at night, not even my family anymore.

So he won´t either.

 “I can see, you think it´s none of my business, but I´m your instructor. That means I am responsible for your physical and emotional health, which means getting enough rest and not overworking yourself.”

 My incredulous facial expression must have said it all.

 This wasn’t how an instructor was to treat his initiates at all and I´m sure, such words would have never, ever left my father´s mouth. Instead of babying me, Dante should push me further.

To my breaking point.

Until I wasn’t any longer able to tell, what my name was or where I lived.

Figuratively spoken.

 Having heard the story about how my parents fell in love with each other and how Tris and Four met, I was aware, those were the romanticized versions, but I knew, both had been instructors and both had been assholes.

There was no way, I believed Mom, when she said that she and Dad fell in love after having a heartfelt talk.

Firstly, Dad wasn’t the type to show much emotion and secondly, Tris gave them away.

When we were in amity, she told me how Four completely lost it after finding out my Mom was pregnant with Theo, eventhough he had no idea Mom and Dad were a thing back then. I couldn’t believe that at first, because sleeping with a random guy wouldn’t suit Mom´s character at all.

But what was even more astonishing was, that the poster child of our family, my father´s biggest pride and one of our most prestigious leaders, had in fact been a mistake.

Not that I would call an unexpected child a mistake, because they could be the best thing ever happening to someone, but my brother hadn’t been planned. Still, he managed to bypass every expectation, others had of him and Ben.

I, on the other hand, had been planned. And I am the one, giving my parents grief, by not following rules at all.

I simply love cosmically jokes.

 Back to the subject at hand. I know, Dad let some guy beat up Mom pretty bad and Four did nothing, when the same happened to Tris. They both tried to toughen their wife´s up, because that´s the one thing a soldier simply has to have.

Endurance.

And I know, both of them would have been caught dead, before speaking of mental health to one of the initiates. They would have more likely hung them over the chasm.

Daddy’s favorite pastime.

 To express my line of thoughts, I grabbed his left hand, turning it around, so the palm faced upwards. Pushing up his sleeve, I was only too aware of his questioning gaze, that was aimed at my face. Touching first his wrist, where the dauntless emblem adorned his skin, I then raised my hand to lightly tap my finger on his temple.

But eventhough I was able to convey my thoughts to him, I hadn’t taken our close proximity into account, while doing so. But then, Dante lightly grabbed my wrist, that still lingered on his forehead, engulfing my small hand with his bigger one.

Now he was only inches away from me, so close, that I could feel his minty breath fanning my face, making my breathing speed up in anticipation.

 “So you want to tell me, I´m not thinking like a dauntless would...?”

 Nodding my head, like in trance, I stared into Dante´s eyes, the brown depths enthralling me, while the golden specks made them sparkle, even in the dim light. Not aware of my slightly parted mouth, I inhaled deeply, my gaze now flitting over his face, taking in his beautiful long lashes, while I longed to feel his stubbles rub all over my body, as he made his way down...

 Dante was watching me closely, but when his eyes flickered down to my lips, I was hit by a memory, like it was a train.

Dark, empty halls.

Almost falling over, while giggling to myself.

My hands running throw wavy hair… How soft it was…

A passionate kiss…

Legs slung around a waist, back pressed into cold stone…

Then,

Being rocked to sleep.

Security…

Feeling completely safe in the army of a stranger…

 Blinking rapidly, I quickly took a step backwards, my eyes directed to the ground, while I could feel my cheeks heat up.

That couldn´t have happened… Could it?!

“Right…” Sounding slightly embarrassed, Dante cleared his throat, but I didn’t raise my head. I couldn’t look at him. Not after remembering that. “You should fetch some breakfast, it´s gonna be a long day…”

As he trailed off, I nodded enthusiastically, eventhough I already ate and turned on the spot, almost running out of the training room.

The only thought on my mind…

I was seriously fucked.

.

.

.

I´d arrived in the mess hall at half past seven, meeting the other initiates, that only now ate breakfast. Taking a seat beside Ivy, Avery pestered me about, where I had been, while Owen, their best friend, guessed from my appearance, that I went on a run.

Nibbling on an apple, lost in thought, it soon was time to leave again, so I threw away the almost untouched fruit, following the pair of three, that were mindlessly chattering, back into the training room.

I dreaded going back there so soon, but I had no choice, but to suck it up.

It´s what I always do, so it couldn’t be that hard this time.

Or so I hoped.

 In no time, I was standing in front of my instructor again, squished between Avery and Owen, while Dante paced in front of us.

 “You are dauntless born, so I have to inform you about the rankings and how they work. You know how to get on and off a running train, how to get through the compound and you are schooled in the basics of combat, knife throwing and shooting.”

Dante stopped, before running his gaze over the lot of us, only lingering on my form for a fraction longer, then it would have been usual, for another instructor.

Not wanting to appear meek, like when I left half an hour ago, I met his gaze and I swear, I saw his lips twitch in amusement, before he put his instructor face back on.

 “You should be able to climb and eventhough it is forbidden to talk about the fear sims, all of you know exactly, what awaits you.”

When he´s right, he´s right.

 The sims were the only part of initiation, I dreaded, because I knew what mine would consist of. At least a few of them.

And apart from humiliating me, I was sure, they would get me into deep shit.

There were things, no one knew off and that´s how I preferred it to be. But with my father, brother and cousin overseeing the fear landscape, it dawned to me just now, that specific fears would reveal everything to them.

And my lies would end up, like a house of cards, that collapses, in front of my eyes.

 The mere thought of this happening, sent me into a frenzy and I felt my heartrate accelerate, while I struggled to catch my breath. Inhaling deeply, I tried to calm myself, by focusing on Dante, whose burning gaze I felt on my hyperventilating form.

Clenching my fists, I caught his eyes and while he continued to speak, without once breaking eye contact, I felt myself slowly calm down again.

Everything about him was soothing.

From the tone of his voice, to the colour of his hair and his smile.

Dante was the epitome of groundedness, whereas I was a balloon, being thrown around by the wind.

Where I was under duress, he was calm. I was standoffish, he was embracing.

Where I was a storm, he was the huge oak, nothing could uproot.

I was wind and he was earth.

 And right now, Dante was anchoring me to him, with only one look, that told a thousand things at once.

  “I knew you believe, you´re the best in everything, but believe me, you´re not. We will push you to the breaking point and further, to see if you are meant to be dauntless. If you are able to endure, what we burden you with. If you can obey commands, without hesitating.

To see, if you think like a dauntless.” His last sentence was followed by an almost invisible wink, that made the corners of my mouth turn upwards.

At least he listened to me.

 The door being thrown open, made all our heads turn, attention now scattered. And the person that came strolling in, seemingly without a care in the world, was no one else, but my brother.

Nodding at Dante, Theo took a stand beside him, mirroring the military stance of Dad, that managed to intimidate everyone around him, but only made me roll my eyes.

But like Dad, nothing escaped his hawk like gaze and he raised his eyebrows at me, before looking back at Dante, pondering about something.

I just hoped, Theo didn’t see the footage of us leaving an alcove together yesterday, or being alone in the training room this morning, but judging from his expression, he had indeed seen it.

 “You all know who I am. But for those, who don’t remember my name, I´m Theo, one of your leaders and I will oversee your initiation.” My brother addressed us, his voice ringing through the huge room, while Avery snickered, beside me.

“And a hot piece of ass.”

Rubbing my face in irritation at her subtleness, I saw my brother smirk self-satisfied, because instead of whispering only to Ivy, like she had intended to, everyone in a mile had heard her.

 “However,” My brother drawled, still trying to put his stony face back on, but not succeeding. “we have decided to do initiation a little different this year. Eventhough there will still be the three stages, the first and second one will be combined.”

Furrowing my brow in confusion, because not one of my countless family members, that made this changes, decided to inform me of this, I silently agreed with the confused exclamations of the dauntless born around me.

“Initiation will only last three months this time, because four seemed to be unnecessarily long.”

The fuck?!  

I was getting pretty pissed at both my brother and farther for leaving me in the dark, while the shouting around me got louder.

“Quiet!” My brothers voice boomed through the room, making everyone shut up instantly. They knew better than to mess with a Coulter.

“Stop being so melodramatic. Be glad instead that you have a whole month less of our torture, so shut up!”

 “Like Theo said, the stages will be combined.” Dante went on with a sideway glance at my brother, who was glaring down Cat, that had voiced her displeasure the loudest.

“The first month will be physical and combat only, but the next five weeks will be half combat and half sim training. After that two weeks just sims and one week, fear landscape training, before the final test.”

 Just great. Instead of the usual ten weeks of first stage, I only had four weeks to decide, what I wanted to do.

If I hoped, that nothing revealed itself in form of my sims, or if I choose to come clean with my parents.

It all came, to who would administer my sims. If it was my brother or… Dante.

The one person I didn’t want to see my fears.

But also the only one I would entrust with watching them and keeping his mouth shut.

Either way, everything that could go wrong in my life, seemed to go wrong, right now.

 “Enough said. Get yourself warmed up.” My brother shouted, but as I went to do as he said, he called me back. “Lexi, come here for a second.”

Throwing him a questioning glance, I saw Dante seemed to be as clueless as I was, while watching the two of us, but my brother was leading me away, a hand on my shoulder.

When we were out of hearing range, my brother turned us around, so no one could see what he was saying to me.

 “I saw you with him. Both yesterday and this morning. And after finding you in his apartment, I have to ask you that. Are you sleeping with Dante?”

Theo spoke lowly, trying to not draw attention onto us. And eventhough I had already guessed, this was coming, it still shocked me.

Shaking my head, I looked him in the eye, to indicate that I wasn’t lying, but Theo only sighed deeply.

 “Listen, I´m not judging and I won’t reprimand you, really. But I have to know, so please tell me the truth. Are you sleeping with him?” When I denied it a second time, Theo still didn’t seem to believe me, but he dropped his shoulders in defeat, dismissing me. “Alright then. Get to work, initiate.”

 Winking at me, I scowled at my brother playfully, before shoving him out of my way, to join the other initiates, that were running circles around the perimeter of the room.

When I caught up with them, I found myself once again beside Ivy, who matched my pace pretty well, while Avery was already slacking off a little. She wouldn’t have it easy with that stamina.

 “Everything alright?” Ivy inquired lowly, trying not to pry, I gave her a tight lipped smile in return, to reassure her. We ran side by side in silence, saving our energy for the gruesome workouts, I knew Theo would force us to endure.

This was only the start of my day and I already couldn’t wait for it to end already, so I could figure out, what the hell was happening between me and my instructor.

And when I saw Cat glaring at me from the other side of the room, I knew one thing for sure.

It promised to be a drama filled initiation for all of us.

 I just hoped I would come stronger out of it, than I was before.

#eric coulter #divergent #eric divergent #dauntless #daugther #initiates #initiation #fanfiction #factionbeforeblood #fanfic #family #paying the price #lexi coulter #dante

[lauraramargosian]

Nick Jonas plays Heart Monitor game on BBC 1 Radio & recalls memories with Selena Gomez!

Nick Jonas plays Heart Monitor game on BBC 1 Radio & recalls memories with Selena Gomez!

Talent that don’t mind going above and beyond are the best. Nick Jonas was recently in a video for BBC Radio 1, hosted by Nick Grimshaw. And let me just tell you, watching him hooked up to heart monitor while being asked possibly sensitive questions was entertaining. The worst part about it (I’m assuming) was not knowing which questions would be thrown his way during the interview. Jonas was even visited by Dr. Jack Black. And that whole scene was hilarious all on it’s own.

Can you imagine having your past experiences brought up? You know, the ones only you’re closest friends know of happening?

It started with strapping Nick Jonas up in a hospital bed (sounds like a dream, huh, lol) and then they stuck on a heart monitor to keep an eye on the rise and fall of his heart rate while hilarious questions or memories are thrown at them, the purpose is not meant to bring drama, it’s meant to be funny and honest.

[ Nick Jonas dishes on new music and talks positivity. ]

Nick Jonas did an amazing job at addressing some memories his biggest fans may not know happened in his life. One of the funniest parts was when Selena Gomez popped up on video. She looked right at the camera like it was Jonas. She said:

“Hello Nicholas, it is Selena Gomez,” Selena said in the video message to Nick. “So I know what you’re doing and I would like to remind you of a time where we all went to Central Park together, it was definitely over 10 years ago. I was wondering if that brought up anything for you, I know Central Park was really beautiful, it was actually my first time.”

Nick opened up about the memory with a heart rate above 80 beats per minute. He replied:

[ Selena Gomez writes a love letter to the LGBTQ community! ]

“So this was at a time when my brothers and I were a boy band and we were in Central Park and we were very private about our relationship. And she was unhappy that her Central Park experience was ruined by the fact that I walked about 20 feet away from her,” Nick explained. “Even though they were taking pictures of us and obviously we were there together it was like, ‘It would be better if we stand about 25 feet apart.’ So it ruined her Central Park experience, so her and Taylor Swift, who was dating my brother Joe walked 25 feet behind us as we walked through the park by ourselves.”

Nick went on to explain he just didn’t want the paps to start rumors after Nick Grimshaw thought Selena meant he didn’t want to be around her during the double date.

They also talked about Miley Cyrus her “7 Things,” hit. Nick stated may have been about him due to the fact that she was wearing the dog tag necklace he gave her before their breakup. But you won’t believe what made his heart rate peak! Check out the video below and don’t forget to let us know what you thought of the video. Don’t you think love how he addressed each question?

Keep up the great work Nick, you’re a shining star.

Blessed be.

  The post Nick Jonas plays Heart Monitor game on BBC 1 Radio & recalls memories with Selena Gomez! appeared first on Celebrity News | Positive Celebrity Gossip | Laurara Monique.

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[tiredcal]

Silence is The Real Killer Ch. 2

For if you missed chaper 1 https://callacaptor.tumblr.com/post/160278829982/silence-is-the-real-killer-ch-1

// Fandom: Undertale - Messed up UnderSwap version - turns into my own AU Words: 767  Warnings: Swearing, a whole lot of death, it’s pretty depressing //

   Sans after that realization went still, he felt something deep in him break. He was alone. No brother. No friends. No one…“That can’t be right though.. There has to be someone” He quietly spoke to himself as he walked back to the empty golden hallway. Sans gathered his fallen brothers hoodie and clung to it no even caring about the dust that now covered him. He searched…

After a month he found a small group of survivors hiding in Hotland. He had taking to wearing his brother’s hoodie string around his left wrist and holding the rest in his inventory. His main job now was to help salvage what ever was left from most of the Underground once it was declared safe. The group was being lead by the Royal scientist Undyne… that was until she fell down from depression. His last friend gone… The number of them went from 80 to 40 quickly and kept on declining. Most were barely hanging on and on the verge of falling down. Those who have already… he put himself in charge of helping them. His LV was now 14.

It was with the last 20 survivors he realized. It’s not going to stop so why not just end it. So he did.

LV 20.

*He has now helped them =)

Now Sans was alone completely and utterly alone. He had no limits anymore. For years all he had were the ruins of the rest of the Underground all to himself. He explored and learned many new things, like about the first Royal scientist [REDIRECTED]. The name gave him a head ache everytime he thought about it but it was fun. The notes were odd but he could easily read the strange language they were written in. Another thing he learned was where the missing king was! Even though he was now just a pile of dust. That was a fun adventure. The one thing that frustrated him, was his inibility to find the human souls that were collected.

Sans read something once about a theory, the multiverse theory.

‘The Multiverse Theory is an idea stemmed from string theory, in conjunction with the discovery of dark matter. Through the different possibilities of the shape at which the strings in string theory vibrate to create matter, to the differences in the amounts of dark matter each universe could possess, came together to form the idea that there could potentially be a vast number of other universes in existence.’

He found this interesting. Very interesting. Now only if he had solid proof.

He grew bored of it after 2 years.

It was then another year till something finally happened. Or more so, other monsters appearing.

It was now his daily routine. Find food. Eat. Explore. Try and find survivors to save. Nothing really changed. Sans had to keep himself doing something. Everything could easily be handled. Well almost everything.

“ERROR JUST LISTEN WE CAN WORK IT OUT TOGETHER!!”

“ GET BACK HERE YOU ANNOYING GLITCH!!!”

Two screaming skeletons, both had somewhat of shared a likeness to himself, appeared from what looked like a glitching portal.

Sans just stared.  "UH… ?“  The two others just kept fighting each other not noticing Sans, or that he was quickly running to the still manifested portal. Sans slipped through.

"I’M-I'MI’M  FREE!! HA HA! WOWIE THIS IS AMAZING!!” Sans celebrated for a few seconds the began to assess his surroundings. He froze. Everything looked familiar… yet different. It felt different to him.

Sans appeared to be in what looked like the forest near Snowdin. Following the main path, he came apon what looked like his brother’s post. On inspection he found that it held ketchup instead of honey. “HOW ODD..” He mumbled to himself.

“ SANS YOU LAZYBONES WHERE ARE YOU!?”

Sans fell backwards at the voice. He hadn’t really heard anyone other then those two look weird skeletons in a veryveryvery long time.

Loud footsteps could be heard making their way to him. Excited he began to jump up and down. “ HELLO HELLO HELLO!!” Sans announced magnificently. When the new monster appeared. Sans froze. It was Papyrus… but not his.

The new Papyrus looked perplexed “WELL HELLO SANS! I’VE NEVER SEEN YOU THIS ENERGETIC BEFORE ARE YOU OKAY?”

Sans was still in a state of shock. All that went through his mind then was the word 'PROTECT’. Feeling himself be picked up snapped him out of his trance. “ I AM MAGNIFICENTLY AMAZING PAPYRUS!” Papyrus stared. “BROTHER ARE YOU SURE?”

“Huh?”

Papyrus twirled around holding Sans like a teddy bear.

“ Hey Paps who’s the new kiddo?”

Everyone just stared at one another.

#silence is the real killer #underswap sans #undertale sans #papyrus #post genocide route #undertale #my writings #lot of death #snowdin #angst #underswap #multiverse #undertale fanfiction

[1ddotdhq]

❌Wed 25 Nov ‘20🎫

Harry and Louis are having another competition, clearly! This time, they’re competing for which one keeps us updaters busier - Louis won today, by the way. The tickets for his livestream went up today as promised, and, like clockwork, the Veeps website went down. Sighhhh come on, guys! We WARNED you about this - PLEASE don’t have this happen on the day of! But fear not, Louis was around and tweeting the whole time, assuring fans that it would work, and everyone could get a ticket. (It took the Intern about six hours, but I finally got mine! Discourse got it in two hours, so that’s the time discrepancy on ticket purchase time). Louis expressed his surprise that site was having issues (literally howwww??? It’s been TEN YEARS!), and said, “you’re all legends! Here we goooooo” , and told fans that we “deserve it!” - it being a chance to watch him perform lmao I stan a confident king! He also promised “one or two” surprises during the concert, said of a piece of fan art “boom! That’s fucking amazing” (it really was, congrats to the artist for a phenomenal piece), confirmed that he loved all his fans, saying yes that one and also that one to various countries for a while before presumably realizing that could continue all day if he didn't draw a line, and promised a bucket hat in his next merch drop. AND! Speaking of merch! You can get a shirt with the cool backlit stage pic they used for his new socials and the veeps background that says CREW on the back and comes with a 'crew' lanyard, or a black mask (!!!) with xx smiley face! All proceeds go to his chosen charities, so go get the merch while it LASTS!

 And now for Harry’s valiant entry to today’s competition: He won best international artist at the ARIAS!!! It’s a fan voted award, and, in a rare move, he made a thank you video to the fans for voting: “...thank you to the fans who voted for me, and for the support that you’ve given me offset the last couple of years and also the years before that. So thank you so much. I hope you’re staying safe.” You too, man! Especially with how BUSY he is going to be in the next month! And now for the “people around Harry talk about him” portion of the update: Anne reminded us that Harry used to be a (Star) baker in her Grammy congrats tweet,  Molly Hawkins posted some pictures yesterday celebrating the Grammy nomination, including one behind the scenes picture in which she had fully blacked a person out. Fans were quick to wonder why she had done that and who it could have been (Louis. People were wondering if it was Louis. There were paps and fans with cameras all over that filming but I mean sure anything is possible!) And Stevie Nicks came back to, uh, suggest a Sunflower Vol 6 music video that depicts a love story between *double checks* a flower and a bee. I wish I was making that up, but there you go - hey, at least H already has the tattoos for both parts of that story! She also goes on to say that she’s happy he decided to become a rock star and eschew the pop roots that were forced upon him in One Direction (and that he's apparently being forced to continue to celebrate and honor and enjoy in his free time mhmm), and that she has the perfect role for him in a miniseries based on Rhiannon (“a magician who doesn’t want to be king”). And in that same vein,Greg Berlanti's hot footie player husband, has signed with CAA,who is producing the upcoming My Policeman. The article says that it is “starring Harry Styles and Lily James”. The last we had heard about this, they were in negotiations... is this an update or simply careless phrasing? Seems a done deal either way, so let's have that exciting announcement! Or not, we do have a lot of other excitement to keep us busy right now.

Niall is being funny on twitter again, making fun of Trump with an “I WON THE GRAMMYS” tweet which landed really well with me and so I'm excited to report it! He also says that he wasn’t snubbed by the Grammys, “I’ll make the music and it’s ok if they decide it’s not Grammy worthy this year, I’ll try my best and hopefully it happens next time or another year.” It was a show of grace, sense, and maturity, love to see it. Also, his merch is 25% off today, and it’s all super high quality, so now’s your chance to get some at, well, cheapER prices anyway. And Liam’s thirst traps are BACK: Liam posted a shirtless selfie with necklaces around his neck and a few tattoos on display, and uh, a really YOUNG looking Maya making a silly face in the background. I don’t say this a lot, but sometimes I am reminded of how she is not even twenty years old, and it is...disconcerting. The picture is captioned “Work starts in 8 hours” and I HOPE that means work on his Christmas concert, which will go really well, if Naughty List is any indication: the song has been number 1 on the Top Triller US Charts for two weeks!

(update from Discourse: there was an error in early versions of yesterday's post, apologies to anyone who saw that one-- Harry is not the first member of 1D to receive a Grammy nod, that was technically Zayn, who hit so many of those milestones first, but Harry got the first solo noms and is well positioned to become the first winner amongst them, get in Harry! )

#louis tomlinson #Harry Styles #Niall Horan #liam payne #Zayn #also about Louis' newsletter discourse: the newsletter does say copyright Louis Tomlinson instead of copyright Sony #BUT i unsubbed and then resubbed and I still have to go through Sony Music #so there's that! #anyways! #song of the day! #Kampfire Vampire by Gerry Cinammon

[1ddotdhq]

☀️ Mon 26 Oct ‘20 Part 1 💙

Tell us a story about love, Harry, the fans demanded, and give it a happy ending. In a way, he did that, but it isn’t what you’d expect. Instead of creating a standard love story, the Golden video was an ode to joy: goofy and joyful and playful and FUN which is really what a good love story should be - a true love letter to the song! It dropped at 12 pm EST (which was an hour EARLIER than Sony Italia said it would) and was entirely Harry goofing off and running (literally running) around the Italian coast. Earlier today, AP dropped an interview with him talking about Golden, among other things, and he’d said about the song, “it’s one of the first songs when I was making the album and it's always been a source of joy for me. And I wanted to make a video that encapsulated that. I’d like to think it will maybe cheer a couple of people up. Cheered me up!” The video cheered me up immensely, too, and I particularly liked the costumes: alongside the Steven Daley floral pants and fisherman’s hat we saw the other day, he included a blue (yes, that blue) blazer over a striped blue and white shirt, complete with tattered vans on his feet, the flowy shirt we’d seen him wear in filming, and his swim shorts! And don't worry darlings, it is still a Harry video, he IS submerged in water at one point (as is the camera, giving us some nice Eroda!fish POV shots.) Remember those pap shots of him and Molly Hawkins at the pool where everyone was like “we CAN’T TALK ABOUT IT the paps INVADED HIS PRIVACY”? Well, no, actually, it was for the music video - He’s even wearing that blue daffodil Eliou necklace in both the video and the picture! There were no other characters to introduce in the video, it was just him joking around, except for a motorcyclist with a neon green helmet and a few old women at the very end who’d car Harry decided to climb. You can sort of see her waving at him to get off of her car and him just...giggling at her and popping his ankle into the air like the queen he is. What was notably MISSING from the video was: the boat scenes, the purple gown outfit, and the vespa! I wonder what happened to those shots? I’d very much like to see that footage if HSHQ wants to release a director’s cut for the video, but as we know that Ben Winston had a hand in producing this, and given his history of withholding footage, I wouldn’t hold my breath….

Is that it for Harry? *Checks notes* why NO it is NOT! Well, okay, first, let’s talk about the reaction to the video: fans love it! It’s everything we wanted but never expected! Parallels have been made between the outfit he wore in Golden and WMYB wayyy back in the day, and it’s true: semi-longhaired Harry wearing striped shirts HAS made a comeback almost ten years later! It’s like his own little version of the ‘how it started...how it’s going’ memes going around. Harry Lambert posted tons of behind the scenes shots, including one of Harry in a feathered Steven Dayler hat, and Harry himself posted a picture to his instagram of him throwing up the middle finger by biting the lace glove and pulling it off of his hand! He’s in the Louis blue blazer and it's a very funny and cute picture and it reminds us that Louis does NOT have a monopoly on middle finger pictures: Harry can pull them off too THANK YOU VERY MUCH! This picture was a super popular one; it was liked by Helene Horlyck, Gene Gallagher, Sandy Beales, Harry Lambert, and even Micheal Blackwell (Louis’ guitarist!). Harris Reed - who can’t help themselves, they’re as in love with that color blue as we are - “The colour of dreams 💙” . They were not the only blue heart in the comments, lots of people chimed in with their 💙💙 love - MTV even made a (joking) post speculating that it was Louis in car that Harry crawled on, and Eliou was discovered to sell both middle finger candles (suggested color: blue) and peace sign candle (suggested color: green). I...want them both. Helene Pambrun then added to the Harry praise by celebrating her third anniversary with the team (“~ 3 years ago [Harry] opened a new chapter of my life”), thanking him for the opportunity, but also perhaps saying goodbye? She says, “There is still a long way to find who I really am and what I want/need to be...what I know, though is that I certainly miss all of those faces who I’ve been...sharing the last 3 years [with]”. I guess we’ll find out sooner or later if she’s still around, but her pictures have been a joy! 

And now for the news I don’t think anyone was expecting: Harry is investing in a new stadium in Manchester that aims to add jobs to the economy, engage the community, and create a space that musicians would want to play at as well as a welcoming space for fans. He mentions how much he misses live music (hey we have a Red Hot Chili Peppers concert video for you!) and how Manchester was his hometown, which made this a very personal investment for him. Building a new arena may seem highly counterintuitive at a moment when arenas are shut down indefinitely due to contagion concerns, but it seems to us that building new music venues at this time, while not possible for most people or places, might be kind of optimal; a new venue can include conscientious future-looking measures incorporating ventilation and seating innovations for the times we live in in a way that's hard to retrofit to existing spaces. We don't know yet if it WILL, but it COULD! It's being built by Oak View Group, an Irving Azoff enterprise, and we're told that Harry “will take more than just a capital interest, he will also be actively involved in the development of the project.” Getting ahead of the curve and building the first contagion conscious arena sounds very Azoff and like something Harry would throw himself into: we're eager to hear whether it's the case. “As long as everything's in order by 2023, hopefully they’ll let me play there. If I haven’t messed it up yet,” he says: yes we all hope so too!

#harry styles #wow guys what a day #i loved this video i dont want see any negative comments about this video #also my opening sentence is a quote from an old fic in the merlin fandom #it is called Fundamental Imperfection if you want to read it #also discourse mostly wrote that last paragraph i was flailing over the video #so everyone say THANK YOU DISCOURSE #is there a better way that we can make this clear in the text if we're switching off the writing??? what do you guys think??? #anyways! #song of the day! #(pt 1) #ever after by the marianas trench