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batwynn · 7 months

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Hello. So I have a genuine, honest question as someone who isn't an artist. I saw you made a post about AI art floating around Tumblr lately. How does one differentiate between AI-created art vs. ACTUAL art? Some things have been easier to notice than others (ie: YouTube videos and like, moodboards and the opening to Secret Invasions) but for art specifically, are there any key things to look out for that make it obvious it's AI generated? I do not support AI in any fashion but in this day and age I do find it increasingly more difficult to tell the difference between something that was created by AI vs. created by an actual person.

Hi anon! So, heads up this might be a bit long of a post but I wanted to point out some things that I don't see frequently mentioned in other posts about A.I stuff.

First things first: Look at their other 'art' pieces. If they have a generally consistent style, a consistent type of work (Realism vs ink art for example), characters you see more than once and from different angles, character sheets, etc. You're going to notice if someone suddenly switches from little ink doodles to fully colored and realistically rendered 'art'. Now, this doesn't mean everyone switching styles or mediums is A.I, but it means to take a closer look if you notice something vastly different than their usual stuff. More A.I. clues below!

For things to look for, there's a lot of different clues but generally you're going to notice a certain new car shine to everything. Everything will be a little too clean, even if the style they are ripping off is sketchy. Sketches will have crosshatching that doesn't really make sense or random lines in a place that an artist probably would not put there. That being said, here's some examples where that isn't as noticeable:

Here you've got your usual body/anatomy problems. (Plus some elements I'll talk about later as well. This one's got it all!)

Glitchy foot, glitchy hands. glitchy eyes. Strange proportions for legs that don't exactly fit a stylization, but more of an glitch. Now, of course an artist can draw 'glitchy' things like this either by accident or intentionally, but you really only see these types of things in A.I vs actual art of a similar style. Realism artists are generally not adding extra fingers or varying sized fingers, they're not rendering the foot to only have too many toes, missing toes, and the foot also... sort of part shoe. Unless art artist is otherwise intentionally including these elements, it's generally a clear cut example of A.I stuff. (For example: Different body types and disabilities exist, and there are people with different shaped hands, shorter/longer fingers etc. But you will also usually find some kind of info with the post about the person/character that will tell you about them that can clue you in on if it's A.I vs real art.) If the artists are drawing in a style with 'exaggerated' anatomy, you can almost always see that as a persistent and intentional STYLE in their art. If they aren't, this is something you'll really notice in A.I vs realism. It can be especially true with people who fully render realistic art because it's not in line with the style, and the relevant elements of rendering art this way. Artists who do realistic rendering at this level generally know their anatomy very well, and are going for realism in all elements of the art. Some stuff like the exaggerated long legs in women are kind of everywhere, but the hands, the foot, the lopsided winky eyes (I don't know how to describe it) are not things a professional artist rendering realistic art would generally do. It's just not in line with the style, or the ability/skill that the artist has worked on. (Again, unless completely intentionally and in line with the person/character.)

For 'real' life items like the tables below, you've really just got to ask yourself: Is this physically possible? Do all the elements make sense and actually work together in a real way?

Sometime it's hard to know if you don't have any experience with, for example, acrylic and wood table making. But there are things that just don't work in real life, and there are things that maybe someone can do, but even in the provided examples it just doesn't make sense to do. For example, the little 'tree' hanging from the bottom of the left table. Would that be possible? Probably. Would someone do that? Probably not. If you're really stumped, sometimes just looking up videos of people making that type of thing can give you a better idea of what actually works together, how it's made, etc.

Here's something that really helps when you're really struggling and zooming in for every detail: TANGENTS

Ok, so tangents in art are when you're drawing a thing, like hair, and it's lining up with a different object to the point where the visual line continues from one part of art to another and it looks really unrealistic/weird. Most artists figure out how to avoid this on their own just from noticing it and feeling uncomfortable with how it looks, while others learn via the internet etc. It can happen in anyone's art at any skill level, but the amount that it happens in A.I stuff is HUGE. It's almost every single image, and you can really notice it in places where something overlaps like hair or, from the above image with the money: there's two bills that just kind of bleed together. From the same image, you can also see how her hair bleeds into the wrinkles of her jacket in an unnatural way. Comparatively, you can see in the Hela art I did below that there are overlapping elements like the hair and the ribbons behind it that do not mesh or bleed together.

Something else to look at: Symmetrical elements that don't work right. So, this is kind of getting harder to see depending on what they're generating as a subject matter and the style they are using. As always, there is a disclaimer for this. Art does not always have perfect symmetrical elements in it.

For example: in the real world, this dude's coat would have more clean symmetrical elements. As it is a sketchy doodle, they're there but they're not 100% symmetrical. With a LOT of A.I stuff, you'll notice that something meant to be mirrored on the other side of the clothing, room design, etc. is actually completly wonky/incorrect or not even there at all.

For example, in this A.I we have missmatching elements on both sides. Not only in things that could be designed to be asymmetrical, but also things that 100% should be mirrored. The left side under the buckle on the shoulder has a diamond shape. The right has a weird spikey thing. The little leaf pattern on the gold lapel area appears to be just blobs on the right side. The left shoulder area has a button and additional little detail under the buckle area. It is not there on the right side. And, again, some of this can be intentional with real art. Her arm bands could be intentionally different, for example. But elements that clearly should be reflected on the other side and are very clearly not are generally a good clue that it's A.I. A few last moment things to look out for:

Styles that are recognizable someone else's whole thing. Example: The monstrosity that someone just generated that is supposedly Calvin and Hobbs. It's pretty easy to tell because it looks like shit right now, but generally if someone is ripping off a distinct style of someone famous, it's probably A.I or at least worth double checking.

Did they suddenly start doing ______? This could be anything, backgrounds, drawing horses, full color, etc. But if they're suddenly, overnight just BOOM they're 'drawing' in a whole other style, it's suddenly really rendered, and/or there's no 'growing pains'/work shown that they've started working on drawing the thing they never drew before... It's time to take a closer look. Last but not least, look for the language they use around the stuff they're putting out. A.I people are often... a certain type. They use a lot of that NFT bro lingo that can tip you off. The tags might be all over the place for styles, or tagging certain famous artist's styles, etc. They also can be a bit more blatant in the tags and just outright tag A.I or NFTs somewhere in there. And, in the end, if you really can't tell and you really love the thing and want to share it: Ask an artist. Or just don't share it.

Thanks for reading, and I hope this is helpful in some way!

#How to tell if it's AI #How to recognize AI #Art vs Ai #Long post #nice anon #I mean I have to be honest a lot of it is also like #white guys generating indiginous and asian people like they're working for fucking nat geo but in that extra mastibatory way #a LOT of incel shit out there #a LOT of 'if I was Elon Musk my apartment would look like this #but also the entire cottage core tag is exploding with AI shit #It's a mess #The best and worst way to handle this is to kind of assume whatever you're into is going to have at least one looser making AI in it #the worst because it sucks that it's everywhere already #and sometimes you have to block someone you liked and thought was cool #but best because being aware and active helps yourself and others

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maaarshieee · 2 years

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Hi, could I request hc's of Shinbou with a shy!reader that often avoids people? Reader kinda acts like Giyuu and, this leads to Shinbou teasing them until one day Shinbou ends making the reader cry.

➢ Sʜɪɴᴏʙᴜ Kᴏᴄʜᴏ x Gɴ!Rᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

➢ 4,104 Wᴏʀᴅs

➢ Hᴜʀᴛ/ᴄᴏᴍғᴏʀᴛ

➢ Mᴀsᴛᴇʀʟɪsᴛ

She's such a tease, but she didn't mean to go too far. Honestly, she needs advice on how to flirt with the person she likes.

➵ Tᴇᴀsᴇ

cw: mentions of death, injuries, blood, misunderstanding, self-hatred-ish on reader's part ⚠ this was actually a LOT more than i anticipated on this oneshot so this scenario is more plausible in my opinion LOL ⚠

Shy; is one word to describe you. You're not too different than Giyuu, who's the most closed-off person among all of the Hashiras, and you understood why. Interacting with people is hard.

Not everyone is gifted or developed the ability to talk with others so confidently, not thinking of many possibilities of whether people would like them if they did this and that, and just go with the flow. You were one of the unfortunate people who has a difficult time mingling with people. You're often seen with Giyuu due to both of your introverted natures, which led you to become Shinobu's other target for teasing.

You don't understand why Shinobu teases you, but you don't voice out your discomfort since you're already aware that Shinobu does the same with Giyuu.

Does she like to target people like you? You didn't know.

The fact that you're not so great with socializing led you to believe Shinobu does this because she hates you, and in your eyes, it made sense. It doesn't help that you never stood up for yourself from her. You allowed her to poke you here and there, whisper things behind your back to the point it was getting to your head. What did you do wrong to make her hate you so much?

Sure, you never made a good impression on any of the Hashiras besides being strong and very tactical in battle, but is that a good enough reason to hate on you so much? Now you could relate so much to Giyuu's feelings.

Shinobu took your dismissive attitude towards her lightly, for Giyuu does the same and never took into consideration that her words could deeply hurt you. Her teasing, in her opinion, was to bring out any sort of reaction from people like you— who tend to avoid speaking to others and just... stand there.

People like you remind her of decorative furniture. Muichiro made that comment on you and she could never unsee it.

Because of this, you began to patch up your injuries on your own instead of visiting the Butterfly Estate unless you absolutely have to. Shinobu pokes you more if you're in her territory and the thought haunts you at the back of your head whilst you're on missions, repeatedly reminding yourself to don't get too injured for the sake of your shattering confidence. Small injuries are nothing, so you could easily clean them and put on a simple bandage. Serious injuries though? You had to learn how to stitch deeper wounds, disinfect, and such. All on your own.

Yeah, that's how much you wanted to avoid her.

Which brought you to this unfortunate situation. It appears that simply reading a medical book and following instructions wasn't enough to take care of yourself in the long run, and now you're stuck inside the Butterfly Estate, confined to one of the beds. You could barely move your body, your belly swollen and red from the deep cut you received from a demon. Not to mention the horrible job you did on the stitches, as well as the technique you used on wrapping bandages on your torso.

You were in extreme pain and dared not to move at all during your whole stay. It was clear that you have a pretty bad infection from the high fever you have. It took all of Shinobu's willpower now to smack you on your head for your stupidity and save you a beating for later.

She already noticed how less you've been visiting her estate a few weeks ago. Shinobu was fairly confident with your capabilities, you're a Hashira after all. You aren't just some reckless slayer that got injured on every mission, you're recognized for your strength, your flexibility in battle, your quick thinking and so much more, which earned you the respectful title of a Hashira. What bothered her though, was the gossip of her patients.

Shinobu is not one to gossip since it's not her business, she has many more important things to be doing, but a certain topic caught her attention. You.

At first, it was the usual awe every low-ranking slayer experiences after witnessing a Hashira in battle. She was about to forget about it when they mentioned something worrisome.

"Have you seen L/n-san anywhere in the estate?" Asked one of the injured slayers. "I wanted to thank them for saving us!"

"No, I haven't. Why do you ask?" Replied Aoi, who just finished a check-up on an unconscious slayer.

Shinobu could hear the frown in his voice. "Well, you see, L/n-san took a really serious blow from one of the demons to protect us. They went ahead of us, so we thought we'd see them here." He explained, "I didn't think they'd heal up that fast."

Aoi was silent for a moment, processing the boy's words. Truth to be told, Shinobu was too, frozen on her spot. "...L/n-san never came here..."

That was enough to make her spring into action, running out of the Butterfly Estate as fast as she could, her haori flowing against the wind. The smile that she polished to be perfect became strained, as a heavy feeling began to settle in her chest. She could feel her worry rise.

It has been days since those slayers arrived at the estate.

And this felt horribly familiar.

Shinobu was a doctor. She devoted herself to the field of medicine and made sure that each Hashira was in a good enough condition before sending them back to battle. If you should die without even her knowledge, from a wound she couldn't tend to, she'd fail you as a doctor. Her heart clenched even more because it was you.

Seeing you sprawled on the floors of your Estate, passed out, made her frantic. Your breathing was alarmingly shallow, pulse barely thumping against her finger. Forehead covered in sweat, kimono caked with blood around your stomach, and your body was cold. It felt all too familiar. Looked too familiar. Your body felt light in her arms as she carried you back to the Butterfly Estate, it was as if she was carrying a corpse.

The events left a bitter taste in her mouth. She lost all of her composure after your condition became stable. Had she been late for a day or two, you would've died. Her fingertips trembled against your now warm skin, pulse beating more clearly. Her heart was erratic, pounding against her ribs as a frown formed on her lips.

Shinobu was relieved that you're alive. She really was, she could just grab your face and kiss you until she's reassured herself that you're alive. That you're breathing, against her skin, that your heart was beating hard enough that she could hear it.

But she was so, so angry. Angry at you, angry at herself, and angry at the demon who did this to you.

Why didn't you seek out her when you needed her help? She's a doctor, for fuck's sake! It's her job to care for you when you need it the most. Was it your pride? Personal reasons? Whatever it was, she's your doctor. Her blood boiled at your foolishness. She wanted to slap your face until it knocked you back to your senses.

Why didn't she check on you more? She should've known something was not right when you visited less and less. When she saw you limp and waved her off when she pointed out. When she could hear your labored breathing during one of the Hashira meetings once. When she searched for more injuries on your body, she noticed more scars than usual. Some showed signs of not properly healing.

She held in a breath.

How long has this been going?

You woke after a few hours of being confined in the Butterfly Estate, much to Shinobu's relief. Breathing became lighter as the smile she always wore on her face softened when your eyes fluttered open, darting across the room to analyze and recognize where you are.

Shinobu felt like she was punched in the gut when your eyes landed on her and then winced, closing your eyes as if the two of you hadn't made eye contact. But she didn't falter, smiling wider as she poked her finger on your cheek. It took every fiber of your being not to groan in annoyance.

"Good morning, L/n-chan~" She greeted in a sing-song tone, slapping your cheek lightly to 'wake' you up. "I know you're awake!" This time, you groaned, but in pain. Your whole body was so sore, and if you even moved an inch, the pain would spike in your stomach. Slowly blinking your eyes open, you frowned at the Shinobu.

Besides pain, you could feel fear the moment your gaze fell on her once more. She was obviously seething under that sickly sweet smile. You swallowed thickly.

You really did now, Y/n.

"My my, this is one of the most horrible cases of infection I've ever had in a while!" Her voice was nothing but gentle as if it was a gentle caress on the cheek. It gave warmth and reassurance that you're going to be okay in her hands, despite the words that rolled off her tongue.

But that gentle caress could turn into a merciless strangle if her buttons were pushed too much, and as far as you could tell, was already at her limit. She placed the back of her hand on your forehead, checking your temperature, then pulled down the blanket delicately wrapped around your form. "I'll show you your injury, okay~?" Unable to make a sound, you could only give her a curt nod.

Pulling up your shirt and taking a couple of bandages in her hand, you felt a bile rise in your throat at the condition of your wound. Jaw slacked, you're left speechless as Shinobu replaced the bandages around your stomach. Honestly, you regret not coming to Shinobu after this fatal injury. You knew yet your silly little feelings were too important than your literal well-being. You let out a small yelp when Shinobu 'accidentally' tugged on the bandages too hard, flashing you her signature smile.

"Why didn't you come here?" She demanded just as you feared. You gulped once more, looking away from her, and just stayed silent, hoping she'd drop the subject. But you knew she wouldn't. "From what I could tell, this cut has been here for a couple of days now, the sutures were badly done too!" You could hear the exasperation in her voice, and yet you kept your mouth shut.

With a sigh, she decided to drop it. Instead, she smiled at you. "You're worse than Tomioka-san, you know that, right?" Your throat tightened. There it is. A straight jab at your chest. The pain on your abdomen was almost forgotten when the invisible weight of dread was put back on your shoulders.

You hated this feeling, and it was so much worse when Shinobu spoke. Can't she go on a day with being so cruel?

"Seriously, where did you learn how to bandage? Sumi, Naho, and Kiyo are younger than you but they're more qualified in healing than you are!" Giggled Shinobu, putting away the bandages as she continued. Her back was facing you, so she wasn't able to see your shaking form.

Your hands were clenched into fists, gritting your teeth as you felt anger bubble in your chest.

A thought that crossed your mind made your anger dissipate and was quickly replaced with sadness. She's good at a lot of things. You're not, she's just being honest about your patheticness. That's right, she's just being honest. How can you even have the right to say anything to her when she's just being brutally honest about what she sees in you? You could barely even hold a conversation with Oyakata-sama without stumbling on your words.

But part of you still felt it was so unfair of her.

She opened her mouth, about to poke fun at you more, until she heard a sob. Her hands stilled as her eyes widened. Then she reassured herself that it was just because of the pain. Again, she was about to tease you more when you whimpered out; "Why do you hate me so much?"

It was the first sentence you've ever said to her that wasn't concerning about your health. Unlike Giyuu, who tells her to leave him alone, you never spoke to her.

If it was a different situation, she would've been elated. The ever so quiet and dismissive Y/n L/n? Talking to her? Giving her a reaction? It would've been an achievement in her books if you weren't crying. If your first words to her weren't you assuming she hated you.

Short gasps escaped your lips as you struggled to hold back your tears. It was all too much. You vowed to yourself you wouldn't unravel yourself to Shinobu, to give her the satisfaction that she got the most pathetic reaction from you. It would've been better if it was anger, shouting at her to shut up. So much better. Maybe you would've relished the sight of her shocked face once you give her a taste of your boiling frustration against her.

But you couldn't get mad at her, because you're not blind.

She's a respectable woman, becoming a Hashira against all odds. You've heard about what she had gone through from Gyomei himself, regarding her with the utmost respect for her determination. Even so, you can feel her, others can too. Tanjiro can smell her anger, Sanemi could tell something was bothering her most of the time, and you guess you could understand.

From what you heard, she lost her dearest sister, her world.

You could see her stare at herself in the mirror with eyes of distaste. You could see books concerning muscle building, body growth, and strength. You could see her working so relentlessly in the Butterfly Estate.

You're shy, not blind.

So, could you hold it against her? Maybe you could, but she's so much better than you. She pulled through the hardships life threw at her, while you struggled at the simplest things. Eye contact, speaking and socializing. She probably hates you for being weak, that's why she always made fun of you.

With how quiet the room was, you could hear the faint shift of her clothes as she turned to look at you. Head down, you continued to let the tears slip from your eyes, gripping at the blanket until your knuckles turned white. You couldn't see her face, and you suddenly felt ashamed. Bottom lip quivering, you squeezed your eyes shut, ignoring the numbing pain on your abdomen.

"I-I-" You sputtered. "I didn't mean to say that-"

"What do you mean?" The lack of bite in her voice startled you. Opening your eyes, your head snapped towards her. Her fingers were laced together, face devoid of any emotion but you could see the faintest of smiles on her lips. No matter what she was thinking inside her head, she always held a smile. A pang of guilt hit your chest.

"Sorry- I didn't mean i-it..." At this point, your tears had stopped due to the shock of her reaction. This was certainly not how you imagined this would turn out, but you could only muster a frown, sniffling. "I..." You honestly didn't know what to say.

It was hard to read Shinobu from there.

"Why do you think I hate you?" She asked in a small voice. You gave her an incredulous look, you can tell she isn't joking either. Hesitating, you rubbed the back of your neck. "Well, don't you?"

She shook her head. You thought you were over from all the shock, but it just doubled. "Why would I?"

Irritation spiked in your heart, brow twitching ever so slightly. Is she feigning innocence? Because that's just too far. "What- what?? You said all of those mean things to me!" You snapped, gritting your teeth once more. "You poked fun at me all the time!"

Realization clicked inside Shinobu, tightening the grip in her hands. Oh. Oh. She grimaced. "But I did that so you'd know I liked you." Shinobu blurted out before she could stop herself.

Everything froze for a moment.

Shinobu's face went from blank and deep in thought, to horrified as her eyes fixed on yours. You choked on your spit.

"What."

"I-I-" Shinobu, surprisingly, lost her composure, a faint red hue painting her cheeks. Honestly, you could feel your face burning up. She liked you. Shinobu Kocho. You felt like passing out this instant. She cleared her throat, forcing a strained smile upon her lips as she averted her eyes away from you.

"Why didn't you tell me?" If it was a different situation, you would've snapped at her for changing the subject. You're relieved she did. "If... if I hurt you so much, why didn't you tell me?" Her eyes gazed back to years, pleading for an answer. Pleasing for you to be honest. You took a deep breath, struggling to maintain eye contact even in a serious situation like this.

"I didn't want to say something that'd hurt you..." You relented, turning your head up to stare at the ceiling. "You've been through a lot and I thought... You just hated me for being weak, like Iguro-san did. Plus... I didn't know how..." Biting your bottom lip, breathing became easy as you said your last bit of words. It honestly felt good to finally speak up.

You wouldn't know until then, but your words shattered her heart. Even if you were hurt by her teasing, you were still so considerate of her feelings. Considerate you might say something that might hurt her. But you didn't pity her, you thought she was strong.

No, she wasn't. If she was strong, she wouldn't have hurt you by teasing and could've admitted it in your face that she wanted to be with you.

"I'm sorry."

"Huh?" You blinked, turning your head to her again.

"I'm sorry." She repeated, louder this time. Her small, but rough, calloused hands took one of yours into hers, fingers caressing your own blemishes, trailing her fingertips on the lines of your palm as her intense gaze never left you. You could feel it. The guilt. "I'm sorry that I hurt you, L/n-san... I should've been more considerate with how you feel... I should've taken the hints... Is-is this why you didn't come here? To my estate?"

You hesitated but gave her a nod in the end.

Her gut twisted, hand trembling lightly against yours. You could've died because of her. "I'm sorry." She said once more, then again and again. Shinobu closed her eyes as her tears began to run down her cheeks. "I didn't mean to make you feel that way, Y/n... I-I thought- I just- I'm so sorry."

You didn't know what to say, but your heart clenched at the sight before you. The usual composed, calm, and smiling Shinobu just broke down in front of you, begging for your forgiveness. Both of you misunderstood one another, but it led to both of you getting hurt. You squeezed your hand against her's and she choked out a sob.

Relief; is what you felt. You're relieved that Shinobu didn't hate you and that she liked you. You're relieved that she regretted everything she said, that she felt immense guilt for what she had done. She blamed herself, but you didn't. You blamed yourself, for the most part, if you just had spoken up to her, this would've never happened.

She wouldn't have to worry over your near death.

But you were glad she let herself be vulnerable to you. You were glad to see the woman you dreaded to see again in a new light. She wanted to get a reaction from you didn't she? She pushed you to talk to others. It was her way of trying to help you without revealing too much of her feelings.

Yet her words stung your heart. This has been going on for months so you can't just ignore everything she said. She had been too cruel, unfair, and inconsiderate. You didn't know where you got the sudden confidence, maybe you just needed to cry it all out and tell Shinobu how you felt. You wanted to take back the control of yourself, not your emotions.

You wanted to forgive her, but couldn't, because it hurt. So, the right thing to say is—

"No." You said flatly. "I don't accept your apology."

Shinobu could feel her world plummet to the ground and crush her into oblivion. Of course, she should've seen it coming. She hurt you. Gosh, she's such a fool. You wriggled your hand out of her's and suddenly she felt cold and empty like your touch was the only thing that was grounding her to reality.

She could only nod at you, her face fell as she made a move to walk away. To leave you. You grabbed her wrist, stopping her. "But you could earn it," You stated, pulling her back to you, "For my forgiveness." That made her smile return to her face. Soft and relieved, genuine. She took a chair and sat near your bed, your hand into hers. She refused to let go.

"I will do my best." She vowed, planting a small kiss on your knuckles. Her cheeks burned. "Starting from here. I'll nurse you back to health, I'll make the Butterfly Estate as comfortable as it can get. For you to feel at home, for you to trust me to let me help you again."

Her voice was small and shaky. Vulnerable. To you, for you. Your heart swelled as you squeezed her hand.

You wanted to forgive Shinobu. You didn't want to reject her. Not when she regretted everything, not when she was so eager to earn your forgiveness... Not when she gave you her most genuine smile. You planned on forgiving her, you were about to immediately do so, but you held yourself back.

Her words stung. They were heavy and you aren't sure if you'd recover quickly from them, even if she said she did it because she chose that method to show she liked you. Your confidence was almost shattered beyond recovery. It was unfair to you, and she understood that. You didn't want to get into a relationship with her when you still felt like avoiding her. When you still felt too weak for her.

Both of you can wait for a time when you've forgiven her.

You wanted to apologize too, but you stopped yourself. It probably would make her feel worse.

"You're worse than Tomioka-san," You said instead, out of the blue. Shinobu's eyes shot up to yours, shocked. That was a first. She could hear the teasing tone in your voice, which left her baffled. "I think he got the gist of what flirting is, but you on the other hand," You whistled while you gave her an unimpressed look, "That was horrible."

The corners of Shinobu's lips curled up. You never gave her a reaction to satisfy her, but now you're showing her your real colors. You weren't sure yourself as to why you did, but it felt natural. After crying, admitting, and talking to Shinobu, your chest felt lighter. You felt like you can breathe easier. Confident. It wasn't much, but you felt so happy for yourself.

"Ah, so this is how you are when you're not so shy, hm?" Her smile widened when she saw you smile back, rubbing at the back of your neck with reddening cheeks.

This felt natural. It's probably why it felt a bit easier to be yourself. You're shy, but when it comes to close people, you're more open. Shinobu has spoken to you a lot, she took care of your injuries and would often ask how you're faring every time you meet.

It didn't strike you how much she cared until now. Damn her and her teasing.

"I'll stop with the hurtful words, Y/n... If that's what you want."

You let out a small laugh, wincing when your abdomen began to hurt. Flashing her another smile, you intertwined your fingers with hers, features softening. "You? Not teasing? It'd feel unnatural. Just don't go too far, okay?"

She nodded, leaning against your touch when you cradled her face with your hand. "I promise," She muttered, closing her eyes, "I don't want to hurt you anymore."

You beamed at her.

✦ Thanks for requesting, anon! this actually got me writing it quickly bc i really like it~ also SHINOBU 💜💜~!! So i JUST realized you asked for HCS not a Oneshot IM SO SORRY ABOUT THAT SO I HOPE YOU STILL LIKE IT~ also sorry I kinda?? went too far on this?? HUDSKADS I HOPE ITS OKAY ANON ,, this the longest one I've ever written for a oneshot >~< have a good day/night everyone~!

#:;marshie.writes #:;hurt.comfort #:;oneshots #:;requested #:;shinobu.kocho #demon slayer x reader #demon slayer #kimetsu no yaiba #kimetsu no yaiba x reader #kny x reader #shinobu kocho x reader #shinobu x reader

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theanonymousfoxsimp · 2 years

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Karl heisenberg x succubus!reader

Reader mistakenly turns heisenberg into an incubus

The moment karl woke up,he knew something was going to happen but couldn't put his finger on it. He awoke quickly to find your form not there in bed but heard the shower running so he got dressed,left a note then went to work on a new soldat blueprint. Your shower was quick and mostly just a scrub because you had oil in your hair from a broken soldat that a lycan managed to destroy.

Your books were a mess when you got out of the shower and dressed yourself,noting the note on the bookcase and began to read it. The note simply wished you a good morning and that if you needed anything,he was in his workshop. Karl knew you didn't need the knowledge of where he was,you could simply pop in where he was without warning but you always loved how he cared that much to tell you were he was.

You began to sort through your books,noting that you had to begin working on your transformation magic in order to not loose the ability to do it. Your books were quickly sorted and put away in the bookcase,then you turned to leave but drove your knee right into the corner of the bookcase. Sharp tingling sensations shot up your knee and effectively rendered your leg useless until the sensation went away.

A book fell out of the bookcase,a small blank covered leatherback black book you've never seen before. Deciding to open and read it,you took your time and set up a small salt ring just in case the words muttered were magical and caused any harm. You sat inside of the salt ring and read the book,not noticing how your arrow tipped tail had swiped away a part of the salt ring behind you when you sat down to read the contents of the book.

It was in an ancient language you knew little of,muttering words and waving your hands in the way the book described until something particular happened. An object in the room began to shimmer with a silver light, the object in question was Karl's sunglasses that he had left. A few seconds went by and the door to the room opened,karl quickly grabbing his glasses then bolted back out with a piece of red hot metal in his hand.

"Oh no" you muttered then looked down at the book,quickly reading what the spell had in hold. Though the words were difficult to read and make out,you managed to translate a few words, 'incubus', 'transformation' ,and 'quick'. It didn't take a genius to understand what you did to your lord lover.

Karl was too busy welding together a new weapon when the transformation began. He was blinded by the light of the welder when he sprouted horns,too deep into drawing his blueprint when wings had formed and too busy fixing a heart core when his tail had slipped out of his pants then wiggled around and his fangs grew much longer than they originally were. What did break karl out of his trance was your quick and rushed footsteps entering the room and the smell of fresh muffins filled the dark room. He turned his head,his signature grin and a rather happy expression formed. He took note of your nervous but shocked expression,he only clicked his tounge and assumed he had managed to wound or burn himself somewhere rather noticable.

"What's that look for sweetheart?" His voice was low and quiet as to not startle you. It did startle you out of your trance but not enough to drop the muffins. He floated the metal plate over,eagerly grabbing one of the largest muffind and began to eat it. He felt like he was starving,a sense he'd rarley ever feel at all unless he hadn't eaten for a while.

"Hm.." you trailed off,mouth opening and closing like you wanted to say something but your tail flicked and lashed instead. You held your hand up in the air and snapped your fingers,a rather large oval mirror appearing and you grabbed it out of the air.

"Don't....freak out but-" you turned the mirror to face him,his expression going from confused to downright shocked as he loomed at himself in the mirror. He grabbed it with his power,floating it around as he examed his new looks. He took note of his fangs,even pricking his own finger on the sharp teeth. He took note of his tail,one similar to yours but instead of an arrow,it had fur on it. His wings were rather noticeable when he took his jacket off,they weren't huge but they weren't tiny,a perfect medium allowing him to grab them and examine them. He eventually turned back to you,a curious expression forming instead of a shocked one.

"And...you didn't think to ask?" He started.

"First of all,magic barrier broke and you took the object that the magic attached itself to before I could tell you" you finished.

"I wonder what else changed..." he thought for a second then a mischievous look appeared as he stood up and slowly walked towards you. He noted he felt taller,even when he chucked off his boots and bolted towards you. He backed you against the wall,arms on either side of your head as he peered down at your smaller form.

"You want to see what else you changed darling?" He said lowly,bringing his hand up to run a sharp talon like nail down your shirt,slicing it along the way until it fell off.

"Now I can get used to this..." he said with a smile.

Continue in part 2

#karl heisenberg x reader #karl heisenberg #heisenberg x reader #lord heisenberg #daddy heisenberg #incubus karl heisenberg

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fitzs-trained-monkey · 3 years

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Chapter One: Lonely Together

Jack Kline x OC

Rated: PG

~I might hate myself tomorrow

But I'm on my way tonight

Let's be lonely together

A little less lonely together~

Sent: 10:52 PM

Merry Christmas, stranger. I hope yours is as bright as new fallen snow. Stay warm.

I smiled down at my phone before clicking it off and slipping it into my pocket. I didn't know who I had sent the message to. It was just a number I had punched in at random. I didn't expect anyone to reply.

Wrapping my dark green cardigan tighter around my body, I pulled my knees in closer to my chest and pressed myself closer against the wall of the bakery. The wall was only slightly warmer than the frigid air around me. It was December 2nd and icy gales were blowing in from Lake Superior and stinging the skin of the city's occupants.

The sky hung dark, low, and flat over Copper Harbor, Michigan. Copper Harbor was an itty-bitty town at the northern most tip of the northernmost part of Michigan. You know that piece of land that's only connected to the mainland by a highway, that in-between place that really should be Canada, but isn't? That's where Copper Harbor is and that's where I was.

Copper Harbor was the sort of town where newcomers and visitors are as common as flying pigs and are treated with about as much scrutiny. It's not one of those small, friendly towns just off the highway; the ones that are pleasant to find yourself in if you've taken a wrong turn. It's quite the feat to get lost and turn up in Copper Harbor, considering its miles away from anything and everything remotely interesting, unless you're searching for Bigfoot or a drunk Canadian that took a wrong turn. Though those two things might just end up being one and the same. No, nobody came to Copper Harbor unless they had a reason. That's just the sort of place it was. And aside from the mind-numbing cold, it was exactly the sort of place I wanted to be.

The clouds were so heavy with the snow that now drifted down, dusting everything in a layer of fine white powder, it seemed that someone standing on even the lowest rooftop could reach up and touch them. The snowflakes raining down from those clouds gave the appearance of tiny shooting stars. Many would have found the sight beautiful. I didn't. I just found it cold and somewhat depressing. Some people say that shooting stars are angels, falling to the earth to bless the lives of people in need. I've never liked those sorts of stories. The stars belong in the heavens. The dust belongs on the earth. Collecting in puddles, the sparkling, sugar-like ice crystals did nothing to ease the bitter cold. I shivered and coughed, my breath fogging in front of me.

I should have frozen to death hours ago.

But I can't die. At least, not that way.

Suffering, on the other hand, I can do that to no end.

I put my head between my knees, hoping to retain what little heat my walking corpse had to offer. I struggled to remain conscious. The story of the little-match-girl was playing in my head. I'd never liked that story's ending. Hallucinations really weren't my thing, especially hallucinations about things I tried not to think about, the things I tried to burry in the farthest corners of my mind. I had to distract myself, to think about anything that would keep me awake. The problem was, there was nothing to distract me.

Pling!

My phone buzzed in my pocket with a text. I grasped it quickly, greedy for a distraction, but I paused upon seeing the number displayed upon the screen. It was that number I had texted the Merry Christmas message to. Whoever it was had texted me back. I unlocked my phone and peered at the mystery person's message.

Received: 11:18 PM

Merry Christmas to you as well!

The message read. I smiled a little, surprised that anyone would care to return my quiet Christmas wish. The screen of my phone lit up with another message.

Received: 11:19 PM

Who are you?

The question was a simple one. Though tone can often be difficult to infer over written text, the question seemed to bear no hostility, only innocent curiosity. I thought for a bit about what to say, the answer was not as simple as the question had implied.

***

Located quite literally one thousand miles away from Copper Harbor, was the small, out-of-the-way town of Lebanon, Kansas. Now, in the outskirts Lebanon there was a hill. The hill was modestly sized and carpeted with thick grass painted with a layer of frost. Although it was a rather pleasant sight for some stray hiker to find, the hill was really quite unremarkable. That is, if you ignored the hulking steel door built into the side of it that looked like the entrance to a post-apocalyptic hobbit hole. See, built under that hill there was a bunker. It looked like any ordinary bunker if one can ever describe a bunker as ordinary. But inside this ordinary looking bunker, sat something rather extraordinary and his name was Jack.

Jack Kline was quite happy where he was. Sitting with his legs crossed on a chair beside the bunker's fireplace, Jack held Sam's beloved lap-top between his knees. Sam let him borrow it on the nights he couldn't sleep. Those nights were many. Sleepless nights were one of the many side effects of being half-angel, but he didn't really mind. Jack wasn't overly fond of sleep, not like Sam or Dean who adored the few hours they got. Jack would much rather be awake because if he was asleep then he couldn't observe. He liked to observe. He loved learning. He loved taking in anything and everything going on around him, soaking it all up like a sponge with legs. He especially loved to soak up a story. Epic ones with heroes that defeat powerful villains. Jack loved stories.

So, no; Jack Kline was not overly fond of sleep. No, Jack preferred to just sit quietly and watch those epic stories as they played out in front of him on the screen of Sam's lap-top.

Currently, he was watching Star Wars: The Clone Wars. The computer had said he would like it, and the computer had been right. He had just finished season 2 and had begun on season 3. Some small voice in the back of his mind told him he should slow down and draw the series out a little longer, but Jack just couldn't find the will to do so. This story was just too good to stop. Jack shoved a hand full of popcorn in his mouth as he pressed the play button on the next episode. He had managed to sneak several bags of popcorn from the kitchen and into the secret stash in his room a few nights earlier. It was perfect, except popcorn needed to be popped and popping the kernels without attracting notice was a bit of a challenge. But he found that if he popped them during the day, when everyone was clamoring about and busy with whatever, the noise from the popping kernels wouldn't peak any suspicion. The only downside to his strategy was that it left him with cold popcorn. Though this too could be remedied via his angel powers, if he was careful about it, he could warm up the popcorn undetected.

Now, don't get the impression that Jack was being starved, or held in this bunker against his will, or something awful like that. As was mentioned before, Jack was very happy there. The Winchesters, Sam and Dean, and the angel Castiel, lived there with him and took care of him. They were his family and Jack loved them. The only reason he had a secret stash at all was because Sam was the only one in the bunker who cared about the importance of having a somewhat healthy diet. Whereas Dean let the boy eat pretty much anything he wanted and Cas- well in Cas's mind food was food and that's all there was to it. But Sam didn't like it when he caught Jack eating what he referred to as 'junk food'.

Somehow, Sam always caught him.

"That stuff’ll rot your teeth, Jack!" He'd sigh, as he'd flip on the kitchen light and catch Jack eating cereal sometime around midnight. Then he'd look at Jack with a disappointed look on his face until Jack threw the cereal away and went back to bed. Jack hated it when Sam looked at him like that, he just couldn't bear to let the Winchesters down.

But Jack loved to eat. Eating was enjoyable as it brought with it something new every time. Yet more things to absorb and to experience. Although the younger Winchester disapproved of the more sugary foods; Jack liked those a whole lot more than the salads Sam tried to get him to eat. Jack didn't like the salads or 'Rabbit Food' as Dean called it. No, Jack liked popcorn a quite a bit more.

He smiled as he brought another handful into his mouth. Yes, Jack Kline quite enjoyed eating.

Plip! Ploop!

Jack's head swiveled away from the screen to stare at the phone laying face-up on the arm rest of the chair in which he sat. The screen was alight with a text message. He picked up the phone and unlocked it. The message read:

Received: 10:52 PM

Merry Christmas, stranger. I hope yours is as bright as new fallen snow. Stay warm.

That was all. Jack was quite confused; he didn't know that number. Who had sent the text? What should he do? Should he say something back?

Curiosity and caution struggled in a match tug-of-war in his head. He wanted to know who the message had come from. He wanted to know why that person had sent it. He also wanted to know why he had a strange feeling that whoever had sent the message was horribly sad. But would the Winchesters be mad at him if he answered? Sam and Dean had given him the phone just a few days earlier.

"For emergencies," Sam had said as he laid the device in Jack's hand before resuming his packing. Jack had stared at it, rather confused as to its purpose. Castiel had been off somewhere doing something and Sam and Dean had been leaving for a hunt, leaving him alone which Dean was completely and utterly against.

"Only for emergencies," Dean had stressed, jabbing his finger in Jack's general direction as he inspected various articles of clothing before tossing them into a duffle bag. "That means don't text or call unless someone is breaking in or you're dying!"

Sam shot his older brother a warning look. Dean ignored it and pulled a pair of socks out of his dresser, sniffing them briefly before making a face and chucking them to the other side of the room. Jack looked back down at the small black rectangle in his palm.

"Okay so, only text or call in case there's an emergency. Got it." Jack clinched the thin black box between his thumb and forefinger, carefully lifting it up as if it might explode in his face. "But, one question, if something happens like-like you said, like somebody breaking in or me dying, how-how would I do that?" He asked, looking back at the two brothers. They both froze their hasty packing and pivoted to stare at him, their eyebrows raised with disbelieving question.

"What?" Dean asked the young Nephilim. Jack shrank away a little, not wanting to upset the older Winchester.

"How do I text or call you? I don't know how to do that," Jack had timidly replied. Dean just shook his head and returned to over-stuffing the duffle. Sam, however, was much more understanding.

"That's right, you-you don't, do you?" Sam asked, realizing his mistake. Jack turned his attention to the younger of the brothers, shaking his head in an answer to Sam's question.

"Unbelievable," Dean muttered, rolling his eyes. Sam shot him another glare which Dean merely shrugged off.

"Well, come on then, I'll teach you," Sam had said. Jack watched as Sam set the contacts and explained how everything worked. He showed Jack how to send a text, how to dial and answer a call, and all the other things Jack would need to know. Jack just watched him and took note of every little thing. Watching and replicating was how Jack learned best.

"Now, if I don't answer my phone, you call Dean. But if he doesn't pick up, I want you to call me again, if I still don't answer a second time, I want you to call this number right here. That's Jody Mills, she's a friend of ours and she'll help you, alright? You get all that?" Sam finished explaining and looked for Jack to confirm his understanding. Jack nodded.

"I got it!" He said, enthusiastically. Sam gave the young boy a nervous smile.

"You do? Can you repeat it back to me?" Sam asked Jack the question the same way Sam and Dean's father had always asked them.

"If something happens, call you, and if you don't answer, call Dean. If Dean doesn't answer then I call you again, but if you still don't pick up, then call Jody Mills." Jack repeated all of Sam's instructions perfectly, grinning proudly at the younger Winchester when he finished. Sam laughed a little, but nerves twinged his voice.

"Good, yeah. Okay," Sam paused, thinking things over, "You know what, Jack? If neither of us answer your call and it's really that urgent, don't bother calling me a second time. Just call Jody right away if you can't get through to either of us. Alright?"

"Alright!" Jack nodded, grinning. Sam nodded back, stiffly.

"Alright." He seemed like he wanted to say something else but didn't know how to say it.

"You two done in there, Sammy?! We gotta go!" Dean called, walking in from another room. Sam stood and looked at his brother.

"Uh, yeah. I think we're good," He took a few steps towards the stairs that lead up to the door before pausing and turning back to Jack, "We're good, right? You're gonna be okay here by yourself?" Sam asked again. Jack grinned and gave him a thumbs up.

"I'll be fine. You don't have to worry."

Sam nodded and smiled with so much nervousness it almost hurt to watch.

"Okay, good. It's good. We're good," He said, nodding and trying to reassure himself more than anyone else. Dean raised an eyebrow at his overly anxious little brother, tugging his old leather jacket on over his shoulders, but he didn't say anything. Instead, he directed his remarks at Jack.

"Hey, kid. Whatever you do, don't do anything stupid," He'd said, half glaring, "We'll be back in a few days." Then they'd left.

Now, Jack glanced back down at the phone in his hands, remembering Dean's warning about not doing anything stupid. But his curiosity regarding the sender of the message was overwhelming. It couldn't hurt to text this person back, right? Was that what Dean had meant by his warning? Did this count as something stupid? What was the worst that could happen? Deciding that the benefits outweighed the risks, he texted back.

Sent: 10:18 PM

Merry Christmas to you as well!

Jack wrote.

Sent: 10:19 PM

Who are you?

No sooner had asked his question, he began to worry that he might have sounded rude. He waited with anticipation for the mystery person to reply. He didn't have to wait long.

Received: 10:20 PM

It doesn't matter, you don't know me.

I'm just someone wanting to give you a warm holiday wish.

Jack frowned. Again, he got the distinct feeling that the person on the other side of this conversation was deeply saddened by something. He desperately wanted to know what. So, he did the thing he did best. He asked and waited to see what would happen.

***

Received: 11:21 PM

If you don't know me, why do you care?

I don't mean to be rude. I'm just curious.

Why do this?

I read the person's question once, then twice, then three times and I realized that I didn't have an answer. Why did I care? Why was I texting some random person a Christmas wish? For all I knew, this person may not even observe the holiday. I had so many of my own things to worry about I was nearly drowning in them. I didn't know this person. I had nothing to do with them. So, why did I care about their holiday season? Why was I doing this?

I told myself it was just a random act of kindness. But deep down I knew what the reason was, and even if I didn't want to think about it, I felt it in my heart. I was doing this for the same reason I did everything. So, I took a few moments and came up with a reply.

Sent: 11:25 PM

I'm doing this because I believe that no one should ever have to be alone,

especially during the holidays.

I sent my reply and remembered to keep on shivering. I could hardly feel the cold anymore, I had gone almost completely numb. But I knew if I didn't keep moving, I would surely freeze in place and be unable to move until spring came. I vaguely wondered how cold it was. I remembered having heard on someone's car radio that this was supposed to be the coldest winter Michigan had experienced in the last decade. Though winter had only just begun, it was already cold enough for the district council to be suggesting face coverings to prevent citizens from getting frostbite and losing their nose.

I sneezed. I had no such face covering. Hell! I didn't even have a jacket! Let alone a coat or anything mildly warm. All I had was my oversized green cardigan, my black Star Wars t-shirt and my black jeans. That was it. Yet here I sat, outside a bakery in well below freezing temperatures, shivering myself into next decade.

I could go to a shelter. At least there I wouldn't have to endure the bitter biting of the wind as it gushed with double its normal force through these tight, abandoned alleyways. But if I went to a shelter then there was no chance of leaving undetected, I reminded myself. No, it was better to stay here, cold and alone, than to risk human contact.

I was pulled from my thoughts by another pling from my phone. Another message from that unknown contact.

Received: 11: 27

Are you alone?

Again, the question was simple. And although the mere thought hurt like a knife twisting in a fresh wound, I looked around at the dark, trash littered alleyway I sat in, watching the scattered rags of paper flutter and tumble in the winter gales, and I looked at the brutally beautiful puddles of speckled ice gathering along my body and melting on my skin, and I examined the bleak night sky, choked starless by the drifting dreary clouds; and the utterly silent stillness of the sleeping city revealed the harsh reality of my answer.

No one was here.

Nobody cared.

Not even the stars would keep me company. Because the stars never cared who I was.

So, with no reason to keep the truth hidden. I answered the question honestly.

Sent: 11: 29 PM

Yes.

Sent: 11: 30 PM

I am alone.

I was completely and utterly alone.

***

Received: 10: 30 PM

I am alone.

Once again Jack got the distinct impression that these words carried a heavy burden. It made him frown. What could he do to help a person he didn't even know? He wanted to ask this person if they had any friends, but something about those words told him the answer. When this person had said they were alone, Jack got the feeling they weren't just talking about the current moment. But maybe that's what this person needed. Maybe they needed a friend.

Sent: 10: 32 PM

Well, I'll be your friend and talk to you. There, now you're not alone anymore!

Jack smiled as he sent the text. The reply didn't take long.

Received: 10: 33 PM

Thank you.

You don't have waste your time on me but thank you.

It didn't take any special powers to read in between the lines this time, anyone could see the sadness in those words. Though Jack wasn't sure if it was his powers causing that strange feeling or if he was just imagining things.

Sent: 10:34 PM

I don't mind. Really!

Besides, I don't have anyone to talk to either.

Received: 10: 35 PM

Well, in that case, we can be lonely together!

Jack grinned. He'd made himself a friend. He couldn't wait to get to know them.

***

Received: 11: 36 PM

Since we're friends now, what's your name?

I smiled down at my new mystery friend's message. There was something about the words that made them seem innocent and earnest. It couldn't hurt to give my name, right? It’s not like he could find me. After all, I'm supposed to be dead.

Sent: 11: 37 PM

My name is Martina.

I sent my name and waited for the response. It came quickly.

Received: 11: 38 PM

I like your name Martina!

It's very pretty.

I flinched as I read the text. Something about seeing my name written in the text brought me back to a conversation with a different person a long time ago. It was a painful memory, and I didn't want to see it anymore. I didn't want another reminder of the still bleeding wounds in my heart. I remembered why I didn't let anyone call me that name anymore.

Sent: 11: 39 PM

Thank you.

But I would prefer you call me Marty.

I didn't want to be so sensitive to things like this, but I just couldn't help it.

Received: 11: 40 PM

Alright! I like Marty too.

It's a fun name.

I smiled; grateful they didn't ask why it was so important that they called me by a nickname.

Sent: 11: 41 PM

Thanks for understanding.

So, what's your name?

Received: 11: 42 PM

My name is Jack!

I grinned to myself. I'd made me a friend. I just couldn't wait to get to know him.

Sent: 11: 43 PM

Heya, Jack!

It’s nice to meet you!

I think this is the beginning of a wonderful friendship.

Received: 11: 44 PM

I agree, Marty. We are going to be great friends!

Sent: 11: 45 PM

So, what's your favorite movie?

And just like that, we talked until the sun came up. And suddenly, for the first time in quite a while, I wasn't completely alone.

***

"Hey, uh, Jack? We're back!"

Sam's voice drifted in from just outside Jack's bedroom door. Jack was surprised. He hadn't heard the brothers come in which, for him, was quite peculiar.

The door creaked open and Jack hastily attempted to pretend like he hadn't been using the phone.

He failed.

Miserably.

The device slipped from his hand and he fumbled to catch it before it smashed against the grey, polished concrete floor. He let out a sigh of relief as he snatched it just in time.

Sam peered around the door, checking in on Jack, who was now hanging halfway off his bed and clutching the phone. Scrambling to sit upright, Jack gave Sam a half-panicked smile.

"Hi Sam!" He waved a greeting, shoving his phone behind his back. Sam raised his eyebrows in a questioning expression and stepped into the room, shutting the door behind him. He folded his arms and leaned back on his heels.

"Hey Jack," Sam seemed a little distracted, "Have you seen Cas?" He asked. Jack shook his head vigorously.

"He's not back yet," He answered. Sam nodded and started to leave before stopping and turning back. Only now seeming to notice Jack's odd behavior. Sam gestured at the phone hidden behind the boys back,

"So, what were you doing in here just now?" Jack's eyes flew wide as quarters and his gaze shifted rapidly around the room, focusing on anywhere but Sam. His mind was working overtime trying to find a viable excuse.

"Uhhhh...Nothing!" Jack tried; his brain had gone blank. Sam raised an eyebrow.

"You sure about that?" Sam leaned forward a little, narrowing his eyes. Jack leaned back to match; his face scrunched up with the guilt he was trying very hard to hide. Everyone in the bunker knew how terrible Jack was at lying. He might be able to pass a few simple fibs by a stranger, but his family saw through him like he was made of glass. He couldn't deceive them. But that didn't stop him from trying, however.

"Yes..." Jack said slowly, his eyebrows pulling together in a rather sad attempt at looking sincere.

"Jack, what were you doing?" Sam asked more sternly. Jack looked at his feet and didn't answer. His shoulders moved up and down in a shrug.

"Do I have to go get Dean?" Sam pressed. Now Jack's head shot up. He stretched his hands out in a pleading gesture.

"No, no! Don't tell Dean!" Jack begged. Sam's expression shifted into one of concern.

"If you tell me, I won't tell Dean." Sam agreed, moving to sit on the bed beside Jack who shifted to give him some space. Sam waited patiently for the young Nephilim to speak. Jack kept his head down and rubbed his hands together nervously as he tried to think of how he should explain himself.

"Well, last night I was watching Netflix when I got this text from somebody wishing me a merry Christmas-" He started.

"Someone we know?" Sam asked, interrupting. Jack shook his head and continued.

"I asked them why they would do that, and they said it was because they thought that nobody should be alone this time of year. So, I asked if they were alone and they said, yes ─" Jack looked the younger Winchester in the eyes ─

"I don't know why but I just got this- this feeling, and they sounded just so sad, and now we're friends! But Dean said not to do anything stupid, and now I'm worried that I did! Are you mad?" Jack finished, worry coloring his features. Sam blinked. Once again astounded by the size of the half-angel's heart, he shook his head.

"No, Jack. I'm not mad," He said, softly.

"Really?"

"Really. I think you did a good thing. Everyone needs a friend." Sam patted Jack's shoulder and smiled. Jack looked down, grinning to himself as pride filled his chest.

Sam waited a moment before getting up from the bed. Stretching his back out and groaning a bit as he stood. It had been almost 48 hours since he last slept, and he was more than ready for a long nap. His hand rested on the doorknob and he paused a moment before turning back around.

"Hey, uh, Jack. Just one more thing. Do you by chance know this person's name?" Sam asked. Jack looked up briefly before looking back at the floor again, trying to hide the embarrassment creeping up to stain his cheeks.

"It's, uh, it's Marty," He replied. Sam nodded and moved to leave again but he stopped. His eyebrows pulled down with confusion before he turned back.

"And uh, is that a boy's name or a girl's name? Do you know?" Jack turned his head a bit to the side and picked at a thread in his jeans.

"Does it matter?" He questioned back. Truthfully, it didn't. Sam wouldn't make Jack stop if he didn't want to. But to say that the boy's current evasive behavior didn't pique his interest, would be a lie. Though, the kid’s flushed cheeks told him quite a bit about the answer.

"It doesn't matter," Sam said, shrugging, "I'm just curious is all." The tall man watched the boy's reaction. Jack nodded and shifted as if uncomfortable.

"Marty's a girl." He answered, trying to force his voice into sounding nonchalant. And failing.

"Okay, cool." Sam nodded, turning around again, and reaching for the handle. Jack's head whipped around.

"Wait, Sam!"

Sam looked over his shoulder.

"Hmm?"

"Don't. Tell. Dean!" Jack stressed. Urgency was evident in his voice. Sam huffed a laugh.

"Okay, Jack." With that, Sam pulled open the door and walked out letting the heavy steel swing shut behind him. Behind the door, Jack sighed with relief. He'd dodged a bullet with that one.

Walking a ways down the hall, Sam got to Dean's room where his older brother was now unpacking. The younger brother leaned on the door frame and expelled the laughter he'd been holding on to since Jack’s room. Dean turned around, holding a pistol and a pair of weeks old and hopelessly blood caked socks in his hands, he faced Sam with a questioning look.

"What's got you so giggly all of a sudden?" The older of the brother's asked.

Dean glanced at the pair of socks in his hand. He grimaced at the stench and held them further away from his face, trying not to breathe. It didn't work. The socks odor was so pungent, Dean could smell them through his mouth. There was no hope of washing them. Nope, those things would have to be burned. Though, taking another whiff of them, Dean wasn't sure that even incinerating the socks would do him much good now. The stomach-turning stink would be branded into his memory forever. Sam straightened up, shaking his head of shoulder length hair.

"It's just something Jack said." Sam smiled and laughed again before taking notice of the unholy stench wafting off the socks. He coughed. "Dude, those stink. Bad!"

"Yeah, it's a sad day, Sammy." Dean nodded solemnly. Sam covered his nose.

"Why?"

"These were my second luckiest pair of socks."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"Well, they're not anymore," Sam pointed out. Now, they were just rancid.

"I think we should give em' a Viking funeral, something to honor their service. I mean, I remember one time when I wore these things for two weeks straight!" Dean reminisced, grinning. Sam looked mildly disturbed.

"That's, uh... nice... But, uh, is there somewhere we could put them before the funeral? Because they, uh, they reek." Sam was trying hard not to gag and couldn't understand how Dean could be holding them and remain unaffected. Dean smirked.

"You wanna go put em' somewhere?" He asked, waving the socks into Sam's face. Sam leaned away.

"Ah! God! No! Put those things somewhere! Please!" He choked out. Dean just grinned and moved to the other side of the room. Grabbing a cardboard box from off the shelf, he shoved the socks in there and sealed the lid. The stench quickly began to dissipate.

"Better?"

"Yeah, thanks."

"We're gonna have to burn that box too."

"Yup." Sam still felt a little sick but at least the socks were gone.

"So, what was it Jack said that you thought was so funny?" The older brother asked.

"Oh, uh, nothing. It was nothing," Sam said. But laughter began to creep up on him again. Dean rolled his eyes and went back to pulling more dirty clothing from the duffle bag.

"Are ya gonna stand there or are ya gonna spill?" Dean pushed. Sam sobered up again.

"Well, I'm not supposed to tell you," He said.

Dean shook his head, mildly annoyed. He knew Sam was going to tell him whatever juicy information he had gotten, just like he always did when he got that sly look on his face. Sam could be a bit of a schoolgirl that way. Except, of course, when it came to the important things, the things Dean was supposed to know. Those things Sam always kept to himself.

"Well, Sammy, if you ain’t gonna spill─" he used the gun in his hand to gesture from Sam to the duffle bag─ "get workin'."

The younger Winchester moved to the bag and started unpacking, grinning his face off all the while. Dean knew his little brother was waiting for him to ask about the thing with Jack again, so he said nothing. He just waited for Sam to look over to him eagerly, which is exactly what Sam did.

"So get this!" Sam started.

'Here it comes.' Dean predicted internally. Sam kept starring.

'Yatzee.' Dean thought. He knew Sam like the back of his hand. Actually, he probably knew his brother better than that.

"Apparently, Jack got a text from some random person last night wishing him merry Christmas. And, well, you know Jack! So he─" Dean stopped his brother mid-sentence.

"What's her name?" He interrupted. Sam looked confused.

"I didn't say anything about a girl," Sam trailed off. Dean sighed and shook his head.

"Geez, Sammy! If you love drama so much, you should go be an actor. You ain't foolin' anybody. We both know where this is goin' so just cut to the chase!" Dean sighed, opening a trunk and tossing in the gun he'd been holding along with several knives. His small outburst had startled his younger brother, but Dean didn't really care. Sam wasn't the only one who hadn't slept in 48 hours. Sleep was calling and Dean wanted nothing more than to answer. Sam frowned.

"Marty. The girl's name is Marty," Sam stated, sounding rather put out that Dean had guessed at his not-so-cleaver ploy. The older if the pair turned to the younger with a perplexed expression.

"Wait, wait. Marty?" He clarified. Amused disbelief written all over his features.

"Marty," Sam confirmed.

"Marty?"

"Yeah. Marty."

"Like the zebra in Madagascar, Marty?" Dean asked, grinning. Sam nodded.

"Yeah, like that. But remember, you didn't hear anything from me!" He answered, smiling as well. Dean laughed as he turned his attention back to the mess of clothing and weapons surrounding him on the floor.

"Yeah, whatever, drama queen." Dean rolled his eyes and kept working. The room was silent for a moment before the older Winchester burst out laughing again. He couldn't help himself; he found the subject hilarious.

"Ah, man. Marty! Now there's a name!" He exclaimed as he started folding the few clean clothing items laying in the pile. "What? Did her parents just take one look at her and say: 'Look at our beautiful baby! Let's name her Marty!'" Dean scoffed.

Sam snorted and shook his head at his older brother's bad joke. Then he leaned his head back and yawned.

"Man, I think we need some sleep," Sam sighed. Dean smirked.

"Is it your bedtime already?" He taunted, expecting a playful retort. But this time, Sam didn't argue. He just nodded.

"Yeah, I think it is." Though worried about his little brother, Dean held his playful smirk in place perfectly, just like he had been doing for so many years.

"Well, you go ahead and hit the sack. I'll finish up here." He said, easily. Even though he was just as tired and Sam was, he would finish out like always. Sam raised an eyebrow.

"You sure?"

"Yeah, o'course. There's not much left anyway." That was a lie and they both knew it, but Sam took the offer of sleep while it was on the table.

"Thanks, Dean."

"You're welcome, Sammy."

Sam patted his older brother on the arm as he stood and left the room. Traveling down the corridor he got to his bedroom and was out as soon as his head hit the pillow.

Meanwhile, Dean mouthed the strange name of Jack's mystery girl and chuckled about it to himself. Sitting on the floor in his room as he continued folding the rest of the clean clothes, cleaning out all the weapons and putting everything back in its place. The chore took him two more hours to complete but when it was done, he stretched himself out and laid back on his bed.

"Marty. Now, that's hilarious." Dean snickered to himself as he drifted off to sleep.

~I might hate myself tomorrow.

But I'm on my way tonight.

Let's be lonely together.

A little less lonely together~

Lyrics from: Lonely Together by Jasmine Thompson

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suometar · 3 years

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youtube

Power song of the day: Wake up by Smash into Pieces

You can not resist, like a moth to a flame -- You know it will burn, but sometimes you enjoy the pain

This is your favorite game -- But you're gonna be defeated -- And you're never gonna beat it -- Controls you like a slave -- But you gotta stop pretending -- You won't get a happy ending

(Chorus) Someday you're gonna wake up -- Gonna wake up -- From a life in fantasy -- Someday you're gonna wake up -- Gonna wake up -- And realize it's not meant to be -- You stumble in the dark cause you close your eyes -- Guided by the sweet talk lullaby -- But someday you will wake up -- You will wake up From a life in fantasy -- Wake up!

You try to cut everyone out of your life -- So no one can question how you can believe the lies

This is your favorite game -- But you're gonna be defeated -- And you're never gonna beat it -- Controls you like a slave -- But you gotta stop pretending -- You won't get a happy ending

(Chorus)

You're in the fire, what do you do? -- You wake up -- The final round is waiting for you

(Chorus)

Why? Well...

I'm coming down from mania.

Which sucks. And here's a glimpse into my 30 or so years experience of this nonsense.

But before I say more I want to say to everyone who I have been venting during the last month or so:

Please don't think that you have contributed in making my situation worse. You haven't. The fuel for all of it comes from within myself. I am nothing but crateful that I have had a chance to vent to someone because otherwise it all would've just clumped inside me and that would've made the situation worse.

And besides, not all venting has been caused just by mania. When I'm manic it doesn't remove the normal thoughts and feelings I have.

When you're stuck in a tar pit created by a certain person for who knows how many years in a row it's obvious it's not just the mania. I think you guys know what that's like :D

Coming down is like a really really really REALLY bad hangover

Except that you can remember every single thing you've done, the things you've felt, the things you've planned, what you thought of. EVERYTHING.

And you KNOW they're all just a result of the chemical imbalance of your own brain.

Coming down doesn't mean necessarily that I'm now depressed. It's just getting back to your normal state from mania.

But the bad hangover is real. If you've experienced that you know what it's like. Regrets after regrets.

What's mania like

That ecstacy of mania is an immense rush you don't really know unless you've experienced it yourself.

It's difficult to describe, but I think falling in love really hard and fast is the closest that describes it best. You have butterflies in your stomach all the time, you're hyperfixating on that one person and you feel invincible, like everything in your life is finally perfect and you're in control like never before.

Or even better: It's like being on speed, except without the drugs. Overstimulated 24-7-365.

Hyperfixation is typical for mania

In my case the hyperfixation can be basically anything from men (real or fictional, doesn't really matter lol) to any action, hobby or even work, totally depends on the situation.

What I do is I dedicate all my time to that one thing and one thing only even though I know it's not healthy.

Thank god I've learned to control it so that it won't take ALL of my time anymore, but it still is there. And I need to cater it to some extent or I won't be able to do anything.

It's like having a parasite you can't get rid of but you can make it behave if you give it some attention from time to time.

What's real and what's not? That is the question

When you're having mania it's sometimes super hard to differentiate what's a real thought and what is based on the illusion created by your own mind. And even though I am nowadays capable to tell the difference of my real thoughts/feelings and the ones fueled by mania the later ones do have an effect on me even though I try not to react to them.

The tricky thing is that your body can't tell the difference of a so called real/normal thought/feeling and one created inside my head fueled by mania.

A manic person wants nothing more than get more of the dopamine that fuels the ecstacy. Which easily can lead to a psychotic episode/period.

The saddest part is that manic person usually looks and behaves exactly like any normal person. You can't tell from outside if someone is having mania unless they choose to show it. Psychotic then usually is clearly psychotic and erratic and behaves totally out of character.

Triggers for mania

Anything can basically be a trigger for mania and they vary from person to person. For me it's usually one of the following:

an extreme negative change in life (such as death, divorce or other big things like that),

finding a new crush,

intensive concentration on some activity,

social media, or

as surprising as it might be: music. Especially any with a faster tempo.

Usually though I have already been somewhat hypomanic before the real mania hits. Hypomania though is very hard to notice because I'm somewhat easily excited and impulsive already by nature.

But I've lived with this so long that I know when it's going overboard. My manic mind just usually chooses to say it's nothing and I believe it like a fool - because it feels so good.

This time the trigger for me was intensive concentrating on writing. While the writing was crucial in easing my general anxiety this time it had this unfortunate side effect.

Nonetheless, I'm not quitting writing. Because the anxiety has eased significantly from when I started. I probably need to change the subject for a while and not to write daily or limit it just for 30 mins a day.

How a new crush can happen when you're married, you ask?

Oh, easily. See, with a manic mind a marriage is nothing but an obstacle. Nothing is but an obstacle that is designed to limit you. Because you're omnipotent. And obstacles - well, they're made to be conquered or plowed through.

In my case I've chosen to keep my crushes online and physically as far away from me as possible. I've made a mistake of crushing into someone irl and that was UGLY for all parties involved.

Thirsting over someone from afar online while remaining happily married is by far a better option.

How to control mania or turn it off

Yes, you can turn it off. The problem with that is that usually manic person doesn't

feel like something is wrong, and

doesn't want to get down from the high.

But there are things you can do to get it end sooner.

Log off from all social media. Seriously. Don't just turn notifications off - LOG OFF.

If that's not enough, remove all the social media apps from your phone. You can always install them again.

Turn off your phone if it's possible.

Don't use computer unless it is absolutely necessary - like for paying bills. You don't need to find out what age Barbara Streissand is at 2:30am - or, well, ever.

Social media is by far the biggest contributor for mania. The apps are designed to give us a dopamine rush each time we scroll down any feed and see a new post. That's how they keep us stuck on them.

When you already have an issue with the dopamine rush using social media just makes it worse.

You won't miss anything if you log off for two days or a week. SERIOUSLY. But it will improve your well-being tremendously.

The absolutely best thing you can do is to create as dull environment to yourself as possible. That there's nothing artificial you can drown yourself into. Best place to be in mania is in the middle of the woods without any mobile signal - trust me.

Take up an activity where you do something with your hands. Hands-on approach is crucial.

Doing things with your hands will root you into the real world.

It doesn't matter what it is: cooking, cleaning, handcrafts, drawing or painting (NOT on a computer or ipad but with real pencils/crayons/paints/brushes/etc).

Remember not to do just that though. Go out (without your phone). Enjoy the nature. Listen to the sounds of the outside world. Don't close your senses with headphones. Read. Watch out of the window. Stare at the wall. Watch the paint dry.

LET YOURSELF GET BORED.

Just stay away from any electronic devices.

The hangover is horrible but it'll pass. And you will feel better afterwards when you're functional again.

------

It's not easy. None of us chose to live with bipolar. It's always inherited. But there are ways to work through it.

I hope this helps at least someone.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

#bipolar disorder #bipolar #bipolar mania #coping skills #mental health tips #thoughts from the crypt #long post

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uberguber89 · 4 years

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Custom Rule for D&D and Pahtfinder: Morale Points

Using morale points:

Every character has a maximum morale point pool equal to the sum of their constitution, wisdom, and charisma scores (typically leading to 24-54 points). players cannot gain morale points above this maximum.

After rolling any type and any number of dice, but before the result is revealed, you may spend any number of morale points you have to increase the result, up to the maximum achievable on the die type. for example, when rolling a D20 for an attack roll or skill check, with a result of 15 on the die, and a +4 modifier, you may spend 1 point to achieve a final result of 20, insuring success at that DC, or if you suspect the DC might be higher, you may spend up to 5, for a final result of 24 if you think the task is more difficult, but you may not buy any higher than that since the maximum die result is 20. OR if you use a Cure Wounds spell and roll a 2 and a 5, you may spend up to 9 morale points to ensure the maximum result on those two dice combined (16), before any spell-casting modifiers.

Why morale points?:

"isn't this stuff already covered in the rules?" short answer; "yes, technically," but let's take a closer look at those rules;

"FOOD: A character needs one pound of food per day. A character can go without food for a number of days equal to 3 + (their) Constitution modifier (minimum 1). At the end of each day beyond that limit, a character automatically suffers one level of exhaustion. A normal day of eating resets the count of days without food to zero. " - pg 185 PHB.

So, according to rules-as-written a character could have one single meal every 3 days, or up to a week with a high enough Con modifier, and suffer no penalties. Zero. none. Not even a headache. your adventurer is not a python!!! this is not how food and water work in real life! It should NOT be how it works in-game. while, yes, you can argue that this is the biological response, anyone who's gone a day (or more) without food knows that this doesn't represent the mental toll these obstacles can take.

Even if we ignore the incongruities already mentioned, it has always stuck out to me while reading novels like Game of Thrones or Lord of the Rings or just about every fantasy novel involving travel, that they tend to spend a lot of time describing the mental and emotional fatigue of living away from the creature-comforts of home and/or on the road. Sure! Frodo and Sam can eat Lembas bread all day, every day, until the elf finishes reciting his poetry, but it's not gonna raise anyone's spirits. sure, you've got piles and piles of fresh bear-meat to keep you fed, but it doesn't go down easy if you can't afford the time to start a campfire to cook it. there's a reason they only give bread & water when you're in medieval prison, and it's because it sucks. even if you have all your biological needs met, your brain needs flavor as much as your stomach needs calories. We've all experience that feeling of doing something you're not necessarily "bad" at, but optimal performance requires more mental resources than something you have a higher skill bonus in you are more familiar with, and while you are perfectly capable of the task in ideal conditions, (i.e. well-rested, hydrated, nourished, etc,), it becomes disproportionately difficult in non-ideal conditions (think about "hangry" or all those posts about existential dread turning out to be dehydration). It should be noted, you can experience all this without the "exhaustion" described by the core handbook, and that needs to be represented somehow. It also stuck out to me that these challenges are almost never included in rpg's in a way that is both meaningful AND fun. In every case I've ever experienced, it is either hand-waved and ignored, or examined in excruciating detail, halting every other aspect of play. With this in mind, I set out to design a set of rules that are substantial enough to affect the story and be worth tracking, while staying abstract enough to maintain a game's pacing. I want these rules to elicit the same “gods! I need a beer” or “I’d kill for a home-cooked meal right now,” sentiment you see from characters in most traditional media, with the same desperation the players think, “I’m out of hit points/spell slots, I need a long rest”. Thus, morale points. It should be said, that all of these rules are in addition to the rules-as-written, not a replacement.

regaining and losing morale points:

sleep: A minimum of 4 hours sleep in a relatively safe location (i.e. camping with an ally keeping watch, or in a barn or secluded alleyway) is required to avoid losing morale points. getting 8 hours of solid rest in a safe location will restore 1 morale point, and doing so on a bed will restore 2. for every night without sleep, or sleep in an unsafe or uncomfortable area, your character will lose one morale point.

food: while 1 pound of food will keep 1 character fed for the day, such as trail rations or a simple tavern meal, each GP spent on food will restore 1 morale point. your character will lose 1 morale point for every 24 (twenty-four) hours without sitting down for a meal. (Even a meal at half-rations can serve this purpose if it’s treated as a relaxing sit-down)

drink: every GP spent on wine, ale, or other good drink of your character's choice will restore 1 morale point. This can include smoking herbs, or other recreational substances like coffee or other drugs (fantasy or real), however, the 1gp per morale point exchange rate remains the same. a character will lose 1 morale point for every 6 hours without water.

random happenstance: rolling a natural 20 will restore 1 point, and a natural 1 will lose you a point. No “critical hits” or “critical failures” on skills or saving throws, only the auto succeed/fail and the morale point change.

good company: during a rest, 1 character may make a performance check. with a 10 or higher, each other member of the group may regain 1 morale point. on a result of 20 or higher, the group gets 2 each. 30 or higher gets 3, and so on. the performer can only regain 1 point on a 20 or higher (performing can be fun, but hard work) A result of 9 or less causes everyone involved to lose 1 morale point.

Going hunting: jerky, nuts, and dried berries in your rations may meet your daily protein requirements, but nothing beats fresh. During a rest, a character may make a survival check. With a 10 or higher, you may gain 1 morale point to allocate to any character, including yourself. on a result of 20 or higher, you may allocate 2 as you choose. 30 or higher gets 3, and so on. A result of 9 or less causes everyone involved to lose 1 morale point.

Going foraging: Spice is the variety of life - as a wise man once said, "a man can live on nutrient blocks from here to Judgement Day, if he's got enough rosemary". Any number of wild herbs and natural substances can be used to flavor your food or for recreational purposes. During a rest, a character may make a nature check. with a 10 or higher, you may gain 1 morale point to give to any one character, including yourself. on a result of 20 or higher, you may allocate 2 as you choose. 30 or higher gets 3, and so on. A result of 9 or less causes everyone involved to lose 1 morale point.

Emotional labor: during a rest, a character may make an insight check. with a 10 or higher, you can aid another character’s check to restore morale, giving them advantage on their roll. A result of 9 or less causes you to misread the situation. You grant disadvantage, and lose 1 morale point.

Pep talk: flattery and pretty words may not win battles, but they sure can brighten someone’s day, and isn’t that an encouraging thought? It isn’t? Ok, well, in any case, during a rest, a character may make a persuasion or deception check. with a 10 or higher, one other member of the group may regain 1 morale point. on a result of 20 or higher, the character gets 2. 30 or higher gets 3, and so on. The speaker can only regain 1 point on a 20 or higher. A result of 9 or less causes everyone involved to lose 1 morale point.

Minor treatments: Not every injury or ailment causes hit point damage or noticeable stat changes. It may be a minor allergy that makes you cranky, or a joint that gets just stiff enough to be annoying “but it’s fine i’m totally fine guys”, or that ringing in your ears that won’t go away unless someone rubs your jaw the right way. You’re not performing medical miracles, just the observations that can come with medical training. during a rest, a character may make a medicine check. With a 10 or higher, one member of the group may regain 1 morale point. on a result of 20 or higher, the group gets 2 each. 30 or higher gets 3, and so on. the care provider can only regain 1 point on a 20 or higher. A result of 9 or less causes everyone involved to lose 1 morale point.

Situational:

Ideals: seeing, experiencing, or doing somethingthat reinforces your ideals can gain you one morale point. Conversely, an extreme event, as determined by the GM, that causes you to question your ideals causes 1 morale point loss

bonds: you can regain 1 morale point by spending an hour or more with one of your bonds. If one of your bonds are injured or damaged, you must make a wisdom saving throw equal to 15+ the damage they suffered, or lose morale points equal to the damage they suffered. If one of your bonds is killed or destroyed, you lose all of your morale points when you learn about the loss.

Flaws: you can gain morale opints by acting on one of your flaws, at the risk of another character losing morale points. During a rest, you may choose another player character, describe how your flaw manifests, and choose a DC. then, the GM will assign a skill or saving throw for each of you (these may be the same roll or different) based on the situation. If you both succeed, you gain 1 morale point and the other character gains 0. If you succeed and the other character fails, you gain 2 points, and they lose 1. If you both fail the roll, you both lose 1 morale point.

hobbies: during a rest, a character may make a roll with a gaming set they are proficient in. with a 10 or higher, each other member of the group may regain 1 morale point. on a result of 20 or higher, the group gets 2 each. 30 or higher gets 3, and so on. If two or more characters are proficient in the same game, each participant can make this roll with advantage. A result of 9 or less causes everyone involved to lose 1 morale point.

Travel pace: traveling at Fast pace causes you to lose 1 morale point for each hour at this pace (think about running a marathon). Traveling at Normal pace causes no morale point loss, but no actions can be taken to restore points. Traveling at slow pace, stops for food, rest, and hobbies can be assumed as part of the travel time, but you cannot make stealth checks at the same time as checks to improve morale. You move at half speed in difficult terrain, and you lose an additional morale point per hour.

How many morale points should the players start with?:

if they're professionals hired for a daring assignment, they may understandably have full points. However, if they're independent agents, with no employment to speak of other than turning to adventuring, or starting out escaping from captivity, it would be understandable (though perhaps less fun) to start at 0. In most other, less-extreme circumstances, you may want to consult with your players, and choose a middle-ground such as half-maximum, or a percentage based on a wis or con saving throw (player’s choice).

#D&D #pathfinder #tabletop rpgs #custom rule #morale points #personal #edited and reblogged

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languagethrills · 5 years

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5 WORKPLACE COMMUNICATION MISTAKES TEACHERS SHOULD AVOID

I am not perfect at communication. I am a teacher, so I am good at delivering classes. But when it comes to communicating marginal issues at work, issues that don't necessarily concern the curriculum, I often fall short. My students are undeniably the center of my attention every day, but they're not the only people at work I interact with on a daily basis. In fact, I would argue that teachers spend almost as much time communicating with each other as with their students, though of course if would differ from school to school. Communication breakdowns between work colleagues can lead to a drop in productivity, feelings of resentment and even resignation. Those are some serious reasons to want to be better at it.

Do you ever...

...hear "You should have told X about this earlier" from your supervisor?

...find yourself come home from work ranting to your loved ones about something that was said to you by a colleague of yours?

...hear "There's obviously been some kind of misunderstanding here"?

...wonder if you should tell anyone about an ongoing issue in your class or leave it be?

...say something that sounds completely innocuous, get a reaction opposite to what you expected, and realize your intentions were all wrong to start with?

Here are 5 work communication pitfalls that teachers often commit and ideally should replace with better behavioral or thinking patterns.

#1: ASSUMING

I arrive at work assuming that the weekly Monday meeting will take place at a usual time today. Monday is a busy day, and I'm completely immersed in lesson prep and ignore to check my phone. I step out to pop into a shop thinking I'll have plenty of time to come back right before the meeting. I come in only to find the meeting in full swing, and I'm embarrassed -- everyone is looking questioningly. After the meeting is over, I offer my apologies to the management, and check my phone to find a message about the meeting being moved to an earlier time. Assuming is such a common reason for communication breakdown that I could have given you 10+ more examples. A while ago I heard someone on the radio ask: "Are you an assumer or an inquirer?" "I'm an assumer," I was somewhat upset to admit. In my experience, people who would rather ask than assume tend to have fewer communication problems. What to do instead: Be an inquirer, not an assumer

It's very simple: if you don't know the answer -- ask. Assume nothing. Not when it comes to your students. Not when it comes to your workplace. Especially not when it comes to communication. If you can't immediately reach a person who you think will know the answer, plan on asking, and don't assume anything until you do. It is upon you to be the one who asks the right question.

#2: WITHHOLDING

Michael teaches a teenagers class. The majority of the children in class are boys, and there's a lot of horse-playing and friendly banter happening during the lessons. Michael manages to control the situation most of the time, but notices it can sometimes go out of hand when some of the more boisterous children cross the line and get verbally obnoxious. Michael can see that this bothers other children in class who feel they are being picked up on and decides to tackle the problem by addressing the whole class and talk to them about the importance of being friendly and tolerant in any circumstance. He decides not to say anything to the management, fearing of being perceived as being unable to control children in his care. Weeks later he receives a message from his school management that the parents of one of the children being picked up on decided to take him from this school. Michael realizes that the problem ran more deeply that he had assumed. Naturally, the management has questions. Teachers do it for various reasons: Michael's was fearing of being perceived as a lesser teacher. Some people do it our of pride to prove to everyone including themselves that they can do it without anyone's help. What to do I instead: Share with people who are supposed to know

Make sure everyone who is supposed to know about the situation is told about it by you. Perhaps the best advice that I'd ever received when it comes to communication was from my mentor, who said "Never leave the issue lying -- always address it head-on." Issues left unaddressed will almost definitely surface, only this time people involved will have questions about not being informed about it before. It is way better to be forthcoming. A conversation delayed is a problem exacerbated. #3: EXPECTING

Diane is an educated woman working in a small private language school. She likes being appreciated for the work she had put into her training, and expects respect in communication with her colleagues. The company goes through downsizing and Diane is made redundant. She's devastated, and doesn't understand why.

At work, there is really only one rule regarding expectations to live by:

What to do instead: Ask yourself if what you want is in everyone's interests

It is awfully nice to be appreciated, understood, listened to. It is wonderful to work in a place where people fulfill their promises and uphold unspoken agreements. And wouldn't it be glorious if everyone was courteous, mannerly and genuine with us all the time? In reality, we live in a ever changing world surrounded by people who are having it just as hard as we do -- what makes them any smarter, mentally stronger and kinder than us that we expect this behavior from them, especially when deep down we know that it may not be in their interests? Not expecting doesn't have to make you jaded -- on the contrary, it may add a little more empathy to your life. After all, you are trying to understand whether what you're expecting is realistic from the other person's point of view. And once you do, you can be free of resentment. #4: POINTING FINGERS Patricia is substituting a teacher who is sick. When taking over the classes, she notices that the teacher had been behind the syllabus for a while. When asked by the management how Patricia is getting on with her temporary classes, she is quick to point out that the other teacher has been lagging behind, and that is why she is finding it difficult to keep up with the pacing. No one likes a person pointing fingers -- it makes for a situation where all parties will resent each other. What to do instead: Channel the conversation into what you've done

You may say something like "We started with X and are now doing Z, so I think that by the of next week we'll be doing Y." And just leave it at that. In an ideal world, I would make it a rule of thumb not to get into a conversation about people who are not in the room unless you want to evoke confidentiality regarding a conversation at hand. #5: FAULT-FINDING

Ashley is a teacher in a summer language school. She knows she is a good teacher, who is also smart and perceptive. In a meeting with her supervisor, she is quick to point out the issues that need to be addressed, but is unhappy with the solutions her supervisor has to offer. All parties leave the meeting a little frustrated and resenting each other. There is nothing wrong with bringing out the issues that need to be looked at. A good manager will want to surround themselves with people who are willing to work towards improvement. Your intention however should be primarily to work towards the solution of the problem. If it isn't, you will continuously get disappointed, frustrated and resentful. . What to do instead: Have a solution to offer

It is always a good idea to have a possible solution at hand - it will set your expectations for the communication right, and will likely leave your management pleased with your initiative and willingness to find a solution. We fall victims to communication breakdown from time to time, and we all need to be better at it. The key is to recognize the mindsets that lead to these or similar situations described above. Every situation described here is personal to me, in one way or another. I have been continuously learning to be a better communicator. I wrote this post in hope you would embark on this journey with me exploring your own communication shortcomings and taking it upon yourself to improve.

www.languagethrills.com

#teaching #teach #teacher #teacherlife #teachinglife #work #communication #tefl #tefl training

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ramblingsofthegoldenwitch · 7 years

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(You've commented a fair number of times about how you don't like EP7 much compared to other EPs. If you don't mind elaborating, what are your complaints about it?)

It’s difficult to explain my feelings in regard to Ep 7... and they might feel like things that affect just me so, everyone, if you feel like digging in this explanation, consider yourself warned.

In fact, to be honest, some of the issues I’ve with it are a matter of personal taste, for example I didn’t like at all how it was structured (as in the way the whole story was delivered to us) and I felt like many choices in it weren’t really necessary to the plot. All this can of course be countered by another person with a mere ‘but I liked it!’. We’re all different, after all, and my tastes don’t rule the world or dictate what should be likable and what shouldn’t.

Some issues I’ve about it are in regard to how ‘confusing’ its presentation is. No, I’m not talking about Will giving us obscure answers, I’m talking about the huge Meta structure that basically permeates all Ep 7 and that is never well explained. By now I’ve my theories and I’ve more or less sorted it out but the problem is that they’re just MY theories, MY interpretations. People come asking me what in the world is going on in Ep 7 and all I can reply to them is what I THINK is going on but I can’t say for sure and what makes it worse is that I don’t think we needed things to be so confusing. Umineko had better Meta ways to deliver things that had already been used. No need to complicate everything by making new ones. Of course, again, there can be people who loved all this.

Another issue I’ve with it is the Theatre-going authority. We’re lulled into thinking that it will push characters to tell us things, and that their testimony will be the truth. All the people Will uses it on were ALREADY willing to speak (even Kinzo was persuaded to do so by Lion) and they tell us an extremely personal, sometimes even deliberately mendacious version of the truth (Kinzo was the one who wanted to kill the Italians, not Yamamoto). The effect of the theatre-going authority is fundamentally the one of a giant fantasy flashback. We already had them, no need for it... unless they were supposed to be red herring? The only person who didn’t want to talk is Shannon, Will tries to use the theatre-going authority on her and then… gives up. It seems as if the theatre-going authority only existed to let us see Shannon going in ‘freaky/robot mode’ (it varies according to you reading the VN or the manga). It’s one of the things I felt we could go without.

A small issue is about Will, Lion and Clair. Although I love them to pieces, plot wise I feel we didn’t need those extra characters. I wave it off because… well, I love them madly because Ryukishi is awesome at creating characters. This doesn’t change the fact I get the feelings the addition of those extra was a tad forced.

A concrete issue I’ve with it is how it hand waves certain matters, just appealing to our suspension of disbelief on threat that if we think too much at it we’ll get a headache. Those things could have been explained one way or another but instead… no explanation is given for those oddities happening. They just… happens and we’re either asked to swallow them or make up our own explanation about why such odd things took place.

Will’s presence on the island? Hand waved, no one wonders how this strange got there or who he is, even though it’s a private island and he wasn’t on the boat with the adults. He walks in their private property out of nowhere and no one stops to wonder who’s this guy and from where it comes from, not the servants who should know who was invited nor Kinzo, the master of the house or… everyone else, really. Krauss asks him who he is but then he drops him with Lion and ignores the whole matter, because evidently that’s no more a private ceremony in a private chapel in a private island but a public place. Lion is the one who has a vaguely normal reaction and asks Will why he’s at the funeral, when a better question would be how he got on that island.

The portrait hanged in 1984? No reason for this is given in Lion’s world, it’s just something Kinzo decided on a whim.

Battler’s absence from the conference in Lion’s world is unexplained (yes, my Battler/Sayo heart shipper tells me it’s because Sayo wasn’t on the island but that’s my heart talking, not Umineko. Knox would wave it off as a random guess…).

The same goes for Kinzo’s decision to hold Beatrice’s funeral that year… in which nothing special happened. Kinzo just woke up that morning and decided to hold a ceremony to mourn Beatrice. When he didn’t feel like it when Beatrice truly died.

We aren’t told why Natsuhi changed her mind and accepted Lion even though it’s apparently extremely unlikely. Natsuhi just woke up and decided that hey, maybe tossing him off a cliff would be a bad idea.

Kinzo doesn’t notice how Rosa is screaming she killed Beatrice.

The whole story of how an Italian submarine carrying gold came to Japan is historically illogic as submarines in such conditions would historically go to Spain. To make us swallow it we’re told that maybe they had a reason to go to Japan but ‘nobody knows it because who knew died’. For the gold the same principle is used. It was hard enough to think it was Italian but then Will randomly tosses in it could be German which opens up an even huge can of historical worms and again the whole issue is hand waved with a ‘oh well, we don’t know’.

Clair doesn’t ask Will the solution for all the mysteries. Of course we believe Will knows everything but if we accept she believed he knew everything also then why questioning him in the first place? If I’m not wrong Ryukishi claimed somewhere he wanted to focus only on the riddles that seemed difficult but then the whole scene ends up on being a plot contrivance to deliver to the readers some answers in an obscure way. Oh, it’s artistically pretty and I love it for its prettiness, but it’s plot structure is shaky.

Note that Ep 7 (and Ryukishi) also raised questions in points that didn’t need some.

The tale Battler wrote for Beato? The fandom knew it was Dawn only EP 7 described it in such a way people didn’t really find it matching with Dawn plot so people started wondering if there was another tale written for her and it didn’t help that Ep 7 manga version didn’t bother posting the title on the book cover, something that Ep 8 has no problems making (note that, due to how the manga was printed the two scenes didn’t exactly came out at years of distance but were pretty close so I don’t see where’s the problem in confirming things in EP 7).

Battler’s letter? Maybe in the Japanese fandom things were different but I didn’t remember people doubting he merely didn’t write it until Ryukishi in an interview raised the issue there was more about it… before dropping it completely. The letter is never addressed again. Not even in Ep 8. What broke Sayo’s heart is just… hand waved. Battler doesn’t know about it and while in Ep 8 he’ll apologize for not coming back he’ll never get a head up about the letter matter.

We’re all disgusted by Kinzo’s behavior with Kuwadorian Beatrice? If I don’t remember wrong Ryukishi tells us we don’t really know how things went between them… which is true but it’s clear enough they were horrible enough to push her to follow a complete stranger and try to escape. Not knowing the details of the rape doesn’t really erase it. Unless we’re supposed to doubt the whole story Rosa told us as well as what the servants told us and think that Kuwadorian Beatrice slept with Kinzo willingly and that she left Kuwadorian only for a short walk that ended poorly.

The family conference in the year in which Battler should have come back is conveniently skipped. Or handled so poorly it seems it’s skipped. We actually have a scene from 1980… but it doesn’t look like a family conference and people talking about what will happen in ‘that year’s family conference’ (Kyrie will supposedly show up) reinforces this opinion only it turns out that the next conference we’ll see is the one of 1981… Maybe a problem in the translation? Still it doesn’t work well.

Shannon feels up on asking Genji and Kumasawa to lie to Kinzo, Krauss and Natsuhi and also… hire her as Kanon. And no one notices a thing about this boy whose face is the same as Shannon and that doesn’t come from the Fukuin house as no one of the Fukuin servants could know him but… out of nowhere, really.

Kinzo pulls out the epitaph, which is a hint to Genji that he knows Shannon might be Lion and Genji gives hints to Shannon about how to solve it but… he, Kumasawa and Nanjo don’t stop thinking to a less traumatic way to break the truth to her in those almost two month it’ll take for her to solve it as if they couldn’t realize how traumatic it would be for her. No, the idea of Ep 7 is that they had to traumatize her which requires them to be either jerks or dumb… while it could have more or less worked if everything had happened without them having the chance to predict it and so, caught by surprise, they ended up saying things in a poor manner.

We spiral down with the teaparty. We’re left with the adults in a definite situation, Eva and Hideyoshi are arguing with Krauss, Natsuhi is instead arguing with the other siblings… then all of sudden we’re told that Natsuhi jumped on Eva and this caused her to get shoot. The manga worsened things by showing that the two groups were even distant and that Eva and Natsuhi were giving each other their backs and it kept on worsening things when it insisted on how EXACTLY THE SAME THING would happen in Lion’s world as well, with the only difference that Lion would be called in Jessica’s place. I can swallow that the siblings were in economical troubles even if Kinzo was alive and hated each other so much that they would still argue and kill each other but… different conditions should cause minor shifts in the plot. Instead the only difference between a dead scene and the other is in how the gun next to Eva is placed… which can be the result of a mistake done due to the change in perspective… and well, that Beato isn’t there.

Then there’s Kyrie’s characterization. Kyrie is supposed to be suspicious, careful, rational. All this flies out of the window when she decides she can trust that the credit card really will lead them to all that money without checking first, that there’s no way to convert the gold without Krauss’ help when Sayo, in order to get money on that credit card, should have been able to do it, that the bomb will surely explode even through its mechanism wasn’t tested, that the range of the explosion surely won’t involve Kuwadorian, that the safest way to go through it will start gunning down people instead than grabbing some sleeping pills from Nanjo’s bag, drugging everyone and then gunning them down and, worse of all, she doesn’t check neither Sayo or Eva’s corpses and misses their vital points rather badly even though we were told she was good with guns. Note that I can accept that Kyrie would consider murdering everyone… but I’ve issues with how careless she becomes.

Rudolf too comes as a little odd as he knows he has a defective gun but doesn’t go take another one. It’s minor as Rudolf is lazy… but well, when you’re going on a killing spree and a defective gun can cause you troubles you should play on the careful side. But well, I can swallow it.

Battler’s ‘disappearance’ also doesn’t work well. Ep 8 explains us that the solution to this is ‘Battler left the house then, all of sudden, remembered he didn’t remember the way to the chapel and came back to ask about it to Gohda’ which feels silly as: Kyrie shouldn’t have sent him in such a place considering how it was easy to predict he wouldn’t remember where it was or should have made sure he knew the way (it’s well known that the church is hardly used and Battler had been missing from the house for 6 years, you can expect him not to remember were it is) and Battler should have asked her where the church was. So again, Kyrie comes out as careless and Battler leaving to realize he doesn’t know where to and coming back comes out as a plot contrivance.

On a general note… I think that the previous episodes better addressed Sayo’s issues than the whole of Ep 7. Ep 7 focuses a lot on how ‘it’s all Battler’s fault’, when he actually wasn’t the only one to blame, and generates the false impression that this was Sayo’s only problem. It’s true that there are hints in Ep 7 that this actually wasn’t her only problem but after getting all that ‘it’s Battler’s fault’ for so long, with Will agreeing to it as well, the other issues seem minor when they actually played a big role. Sayo also comes out as petty, pushing the blame of her actions solely on Battler, when we know that in Prime she actually took responsibility for them. So ultimately I think Ep 7 did her a disservice.

Ep 7 also lost a good chance to dig deeper into the motivations of minor characters like Genji, Nanjo and Kumasawa for setting up Sayo’s life in a manner that was… simply terrible.

I’ll let slide the whole matter of how they let her believe her sex was female without even bothering to prepare her for the fact she wouldn’t develop secondary sex characteristic or be able to become pregnant because Umineko wanted to keep in the dark Sayo’s sex and use the full trauma of her discovering her own condition as one of the driving forces for the whole thing (even though the fact that Ep 7 completely overlooked on the whole matter ended up making it look less important than it was).

Let’s focus on the fact they kidnapped Sayo and gave her a new identity so that Kinzo won’t make the same mistake and rape her, which is understandable really, but then they took her back on Rokkenjima AS AN ORPHANED SERVANT, when she was too young to work and under the disguise she was actually younger. Kinzo could have recognized Beatrice in her again, think this time Beatrice reincarnated in a person unrelated to him and rape her all over taking advantage of the fact that now she was his servant. It’s a horrible plan and their decision for going through it is… poorly explained.

Then there’s the loss of a chance to let us know more about minor characters like Kinzo’s wife (where was she when the baby was handed to Natsuhi since she was clearly still alive to scold Rosa and push her to escape in the forest and meet with Beatrice? Natsuhi claimed that Krauss and Kinzo were away but what about Kinzo’s wife? Did they drag her along?) or how Asumu, a young woman with no health problem mentioned, suddenly died, to dig a little better in Battler’s six years away from his family and his feelings for Sayo (he’s jealous she chose George but then he can brush it off… so it looks like it isn’t a big deal… only we’ll learn in Prime he risked his life for her more than once and, hadn’t she died, he was willing to spend the rest of his life with her).

Then there are issues I’ve specifically with the manga.

In the scene in which the culprit shows up for the first time… the culprit’s form is slightly kept in the dark but we can see she’s not Shannon, she’s not Beatrice and she isn’t even Clair. There’s no reason for this person in the dark to be an ‘extra’ person.

Kinzo’s wife has no face nor name. I can get over the fact they didn’t give her a name, not on the fact the mangaka didn’t give her a face as there’s no reason to obscure it. She’s not hiding some dark secret. We won’t learn the truth about her later on as we’ll do with Asumu, whose face will be showed only in Ep 8 (bless Ep 8). Yes, maybe they wanted to drive home that for Kinzo she was a ‘not entity’ (his children too get no face) but still… I don’t like this. Personal taste? Maybe.

The manga tossed in a bunch of nameless maids who… go nowhere really (when it would have been so much better if, as someone (myself included) speculated, they also were vessels for things like the Chiesters or the Eiserne Jungfraws) as they don’t get names and just… disappear, while waited to introduce Reinon. This is more or less a direct transposition of how the VN handled matters, only in the VN it worked better as there were no random new faces, just random voices so you could speculate it was a 7 sister maid the one speaking and it wasn’t so clear that Reinon popped up later. The manga makes obvious that’s not the case.

Ep 5 manga version implied the promise happened on the same balcony on which Beatrice, in Ep 4, asked Battler to remember about his sin. This was a wonderful new info but… it goes completely skipped over in the manga transposition of Ep 7. Ep 7 manga version transposes faithfully the novel and just focus on the scene in the garden… where no clear promise is made. Sayo just urges Battler to come and he confirms he’ll do but he never says ‘I promise’ nor they’ll make a pinky swear.

Overall, Ep 7 isn’t fully to blame for most of the issues I’ve with it.

The background behind the Umineko plot is one of an huge amount of extremely unlikely facts happening one after the other, most of whom we’re asked to figure out. While unlikely facts can and will happen, often, in stories in general and in mystery stories in particular the author usually avoids them or explains/excuses them. Umineko just… embraced them as if the unlikely were the ordinary and Ep 7 was the point in which we were asked to do the same, often without being given a convincing reason for having to do this beyond ‘it was unlikely but it just happened, insert devil’s proof here’.

That’s why I wish the manga had at least dimmed some issues I had with the novel version, for example handled better (and not worse) why Eva ended up shooting Natsuhi or how Kyrie and Rudolf murdered everyone in Lion’s world as well.

Most of those issues weren’t IMPOSSIBLE to handle. They just weren’t explained, hand waved with an ‘it happened, don’t think too hard at it’.

As a result, I feel Ep 7 was handled poorly and the manga version did nothing to fix it. It’s my personal impression. I know there’s who loves Ep 7 and how it handled everything and, as usual, that’s fine.

#Umineko #Requiem of the Golden Witch #Umineko VN #Umineko Manga

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