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seeingivy · 1 day

Text

3:45 am

ryomen sukuna x f!reader

an: I can't find the request, but someone asked for a sukuna version of the 3:45 am chapter of roommate eren! here it is <3

“why do you have such a shit face?”

you look up from your computer to find sukuna lingering by the door – fidgeting with the buttons of his collar and the end of his tie – as he spares you an irritated glance. it’s one that you return right back, before hunching back over the table and focusing back in on the lab report you were writing.

“i’m talking to you.”

sukuna shuffles over to your side, before crouching down till your faces are side by side, the breaths coming out of his nose tickling the bare skin on your shoulder.

“i have such a shit face because i looked at you.” you mumble.

sukuna sucks in a breath, almost like he’s trying hard to conceal his laughter, before he leans closer, leaning his chin on your collarbone. the proximity makes it hard to ignore the sweet smell of his shampoo, which only gets worse when it’s accompanied by the sharp scent of his cologne.

“is that any way…to repay my kindness?” sukuna questions.

you roll your eyes, lightly jolting your shoulder up to get him to stop leaning on you. and he takes the hint just as much, as he draws up the chair at your side and pulls closer to see the molecules that you’re constructing on your computer.

“you know, when you said you were going to do this favor for me, i wasn’t exactly expecting that you were going to hold it over my head this way.”

ryomen sukuna was just an acquaintance – who happened to be in the wrong place, at the wrong time – and then he wasn’t.

it’s because he has a moral compass. or because really, he feels guilty for not telling you earlier – especially when he’s seen other friends of his in the same position as you. so when he found you down on your luck – getting cheated on by your boyfriend, who you lived with, by your best friend of all people – he offered you the extra room that he had in his apartment.

i’m lots of things, but i’m not a sadist. that’s what he said when you snuck out in the middle of the night, all of your things packed into a box that you subsequently emptied out into the free room that he offered. he had hell to pay from your ex-boyfriend the next day, the two of them jostling it out on the basketball court, before they both got reprimanded by the coach and decided to keep their distance

sukuna isn’t a bad roommate. he isn’t exactly a good roommate per say either. because the sweet kindness that he offered you wore off around the second day and you realized that really – he was one of the most irritating people that’s every walked the surface of this earth.

he brought over girls – tons of them. and when you asked him to keep it down, just so you could get some assignments done or study for an exam, he’d make it a point to bring multiple girls over – just to see the irritated expression on your face.

he’d make up for it of course. because what he lacked in face-forward politeness, he made up for with his quiet gestures. like making you breakfast the morning of said exam – set with a matcha latte that he learned how to make special for you, because you don’t like the taste of coffee. or whenever he found you crying, he’d always let you rant it out – but not without giving you a few insults about how you had no standards here and there.

“i think it’s dumb as fuck that you aren’t going tonight.” sukuna says.

you slam the enter key on your computer.

“your opinion has been noted.” you respond.

“then come.” he grates.

athletes at the university get to attend a formal at the end of each semester. it’s a nice dinner, accompanied with a horrible DJ, and a weird mix of sentimental speeches.

really, it was actually your idea of fun. only because it always felt nice to go to events like this. it was one of the few excuses you had to use the pretty dresses that you had in your closet, actually blow out your hair to make it look nice, and use the pretty glitters that your sister had given you for your birthday last year.

and even more than that, it always felt nice to be shown off. because you’d meet tons of people who had heard all about you – the coach, the athletic trainers – who’d all give you sweet comments about how you were far too good for your boyfriend, who would then make some silly comment about how he never knew how he got you to talk to him in the first place.

sukuna offered to accompany you. and also promised that he’d sneak some kind of contraband in so that the two of you could actually have fun – but it was something you denied. you denied most of the offers that he made that were similar to this, even though he was quite persistent, only because you knew that it wasn’t the right time.

for better lack of words, you felt like a kicked dog. and you needed time to recover – before you could see your old best friends, or your ex-boyfriend, or really anyone outside the three circle rotation of people that you were able to tolerate.

“i won’t have fun. and i don’t want to be a downer on the one night that’s supposed to be for you.” you respond.

“well, you’re always a downer. so it won’t exactly make a difference.” sukuna responds.

“thanks. that really makes me feel better, sukuna.”

“i live to serve.” he responds, before bracing his hands against the table and pushing off.

he spares you one last glance before stopping at the mirror near door, toussling with his hair and the piercings hanging from his ears. it’s a passing thought that you immediately banish – that panging in your chest at the thought of sukuna enjoying the night with a lanky girl on his arm.

“you know, if you stare for any longer, you’re going to fall in.” you respond.

“hilarious.” he deadpans.

“who are you going with? i’ll have to make a phone call and let her know that she’s just going to have to find her own ride.”

“no one.”

you feign shock, pressing one of your hands to your chest – and really, trying to hide the secret delight that you’re reveling in.

“wow. did hell freeze over?”

“just didn’t feel like it. this type of shit is always kind of boring.” sukuna responds.

you shrug.

“i don’t know. i always thought it was kind of fun.”

sukuna turns around, sparing you one last glance.

“you know, i do recall that you would stand in the corner and talk to the moms all night. that sounds like my personal nightmare.”

you smile.

“well, that’s just because the moms don’t really like you. i however get along with them quite well.”

sukuna rolls his eyes.

“i’m sure that’s true. i’ll see you, okay? don’t sleep too late.”

you give him a sly look.

“worried about me?”

“no, you just look ugly with eye bags.”

you do not take sukuna’s advice. instead, you finish up your lab report and open a bottle of pink wine – to accompany you in your endeavors to watch ten things i hate about you.

and it goes considerably well – until you hear a slamming pounding on your door at 3:45 am. you reach for the closest jacket, one of sukuna’s hoodies, before pulling it over your shorts and peeking out of the peephole.

you swing the door open.

“right. hi.”

you pause.

“megumi, right?”

“yeah. just bringing sukuna back. he’s plastered.”

you look down to where he’s gesturing to find sukuna slumped against the wall, offering you a half hearted smile from his bloodied nose.

“right. well, thanks for bringing him back. what happened to his face?”

“same as last time.”

you roll your eyes, as megumi drags sukuna up by the arms. he stumbles in the air, leaning his weight against you, as you shoot megumi one last smile before slamming the door shut.

the sweet smell of his shampoo and cologne is gone all together – now replaced with the mix of metallic blood, sweat, and the faintest smell of beer.

“sit down, sukuna. i’m going to clean you up.” you mumble, trying to stabilize him in the air to stand by himself.

“y/n?” he asks, before stumbling in the air.

you reach forward, trying to brace his fall as he looks down at you – suddenly somewhat awake as his face breaks out into a small smile. he reaches forward, bringing one of his bloodied knuckles to cup the side of your face.

“y/n.” he whispers.

you swallow the block in your throat in your stomach.

“don’t try to sweet talk me. i’m mad at you.” you respond, dragging him towards the center before leaning him against the kitchen counter.

you reach down to the bottom of the sink, setting a glass of water aside and pulling out the little box of first aid that you had put together once you got here and put it at his side. you open up the neatly organized compartments, pulling out the gauze and the alcohol wipes, before turning back to him.

“don’t be mad, princess.” he mumbles.

you feel your cheeks burn.

“don’t call me that.”

“isn’t that what you are? my little brat?”

you scoff.

“are you trying to insult me?” you ask, reaching for his left hand first and swiping the area clean.

“you have no…no idea what i think about you.”

you reach for the wrappings, tucking them in against the callousness of his hands, as he looks down, locking his fingers in with yours. and then he leans forward, snaking one of his hands around your neck.

you quickly shuffle yourself out of his embrace, before lightly pushing him back. he seems to take the cue, before you lean forward again, slightly hesitant this time, as you wipe the area around his nose.

“why’d you fight with him this time?”

sukuna scrunches his face up – irritated at the mention of the past few hours.

“nothing he didn’t fucking deserve.”

“right. last time, he missed a three pointer and you socked him in the face. so let me guess, he was two hours late today and you just got carried away?”

sukuna scoffs.

“he was running his mouth.”

your curiosity has piqued.

“about?”

“you.” sukuna slurs.

you smile.

“so glad to see you had sound judgment tonight, sukuna.” you respond, voice dripping with sarcasm.

sukuna leans forward, his lips a little too dangerously close as he rests his hands at the sides of your waist.

“he brought that stupid bitch with him.”

“sukuna.” you warn.

“he brought. that stupid bitch with him. and he had the nerve to stand there and talk shit about you.” sukuna responds.

you reach for the glass and place it in his hands, offering him a smile.

“just drink the water to sober up a little bit. it’s late.”

sukuna gives you a glare, as you let go of the glass, only for him to spill the entirety of it on you with his shaky hands. he barely registers that he did it – and you suppose that it’s really your fault for trusting him to hold the glass on his own – as you swing your arm around his torso and lead him towards his room.

he flops onto the bed as you rummage through his drawers, pulling out a pair of pants and shirt for him as you turn back around.

“sukuna. get up and change and you can sleep all you want.” you coax.

he responds with an unintelligible noise – further muffled by the fact that he’s face down on the bed – as you reach for one of his arms and pull. he somewhat works with you, sitting up as he wobbles, and reaches for the tie around his neck and tosses it aside.

his first struggle comes with the buttons. because he can’t seem to coordinate his fingers well enough to push the buttons through the holes – and obviously, with the short temper he has, gives up in all but three seconds.

“help.”

you roll your eyes as he stands up, leaning against you as you reach forward, and slowly unbutton down the length of the shirt.

“you drive me crazy, you know that?” sukuna whispers.

you ignore the comment as you pull the shirt down the length of his arms – exposing the tattoos that you’ve always wondered about, that peek out of the sleeves of his shirt or neck. you hand him the shirt, which he tosses aside.

“too hot.”

“okay, well. just put the pants on and then i’ll leave. i’ll turn around.” you respond.

you turn around, twisting the rings on your fingers as you wait for him to finish, only to me met what could possibly be your worst nightmare.

“y/n. wait, fuck. you have to help.” he whines.

you turn around to look at him, only to find that he’s still wearing his pants.

“what?”

“the button. i can’t…”

you feel your throat dry.

“sukuna. i can’t…take your pants off for you. just try harder.”

“just fucking help me.”

you shake off the nervousness, as you bend down on your knees, trying to squint through the dark light to find the button. except before you can fully do it, sukuna reaches for your biceps and somewhat harshly pulls you up.

“wh-”

you look up to find him swallowing hard, before he talks.

“it’s like you’re trying to make this difficult for me. don’t get on your fucking knees to do it.” sukuna responds.

“how else am i supposed to see it?”

sukuna doesn’t respond, as you shake your head and feel down the length of his pants, before you find the button. and surely enough, it’s hard to push but you get it after a second try, and turn around as sukuna switches the pants he’s wearing.

and you almost make your sweet escape before he tangles his fingers around your wrist and pulls back. his fingers are fast on your waist as he turns you around, somewhat toppling your balance so you’re leaning against his chest – and stuck in his embrace.

“stay.” he whispers.

“you are so fucking drunk, sukuna.”

“stay, please. i don’t want to sleep without you.”

you shake your head.

“my hoodie is wet. i have to change.”

sukuna shakes his head.

“are you wearing anything underneath? you know i wouldn’t mind either way.” sukuna whispers.

“a tank top, but really. i have to go back to –”

sukuna’s fingers are fast – since he apparently has enough coordination to help you with this – as he pulls it over your head, before setting his hands back around your waist. the way he’s looking down at you, eyes wide, makes you shiver as he leans forward, and presses his fingers against your collarbone.

“you have a tattoo.” sukuna whispers.

you laugh.

“so do you.”

and it makes your skin shiver, when sukuna snakes his hands underneath your shirt, leaning forward to press his lips against the inked skin on your shoulder, unable to contain your surprise. the tufts of his hair tickle your neck as you lean back, placing your hands on the sides of his face.

“you’re drunk.”

sukuna pauses.

“is that the only reason you’re saying no?”

you shake your head.

“go to bed. you don’t even know what you’re fuckking saying right now.”

“just stay with me.”

sukuna releases his grasp, instead reaching for both of your hands and squeezing at your fingers.

“please. don’t leave me alone.”

“okay, okay. let’s just go sleep. we’ll talk in the morning.”

you wake up to the most haunting sight known to man – sukuna hovering over you.

“jesus fuck.”

sukuna laughs as you press your palms into the sockets of your eyes, pushing as hard as can as you very quickly remember the events of last night – of the shivering feeling of sukuna’s lips on your neck and the horribly embarrassing moan you let out when he did.

“oh god.”

you open your eyes to find sukuna still hovering – an almost too excited grin painted on his face – his silver necklace hanging in the air.

“give me permission this time.” sukuna states.

you widen your eyes.

“i beg your pardon?”

sukuna snakes one of his fingers under your waist, using the other to trace the outline of your tattoo again, as he leans closer to you, the distance dangerously close considering the events of last night.

“give me permission.” sukuna asks.

“you…”

sukuna rolls his eyes, before leaning forward and pressing a chaste kiss to your forehead.

“if it wasn’t clear, i think about you very often. irritatingly enough, i’m actually very fond of you. so much so, that i turned down that fucking barista from the coffee shop last night and went to that fucking party by myself..”

“marie?”

“is that her name?” sukuna asks.

you bite down on your cheek.

“i also gave someone a beating for you and got suspended from playing for two weeks, so just give me fucking permission now.”

“you got what?”

sukuna leans down, resting his chin against your bicep, as he eyes you again, before pressing a kiss to the skin.

“give me permission.”

“you’ve already kissed me twice.”

sukuna shakes his head.

“cmon. i need to hear it.”

you shake your head, suddenly hyper aware of the fact that your heart is pounding in your chest as you look down at him, brown eyes peering into yours

“um. okay? ….yes. or yeah, whatever, i –”

all you hear is an excited chuckle before his lips are against yours, hands almost rough around your neck as he pulls you up, till your straddling him in his lap, hands secured around his neck. and you can tell that he’s enjoying himself far too much – from the way he smiles into the kiss, before pressing three, four, and five kisses to your cheek.

you fight the urge to smile at him fully as you lean forward, cupping his face in your hands and eyeing the cut across the bridge of his nose.

“have i repaid your kindness yet?” you murmur.

sukuna pauses, before leaning in.

“no, i think i need a little bit more.”

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g0niki · 3 days

Text

through your window ── h.ts & k.lh

pairing: sneaky link! taesan x afab!reader x voyeur!leehan (used their real names for plot purposes)

word count: 964 (shorter than usual)

contents: no protection(do better.), taesan's a bit rough, leehan is a creep... non-con voyeurism, mmm pretty tame lmk if i missed anything!

a/n: not my best,, but i need to get out of this writer's block 🤸 @jwonsite helped me with the ending🖤

donghyun hated the way he touched you. he hated the way his hands ran down your curves, the way he pushed his lips against yours, how he firmly pushed you down onto the soft material of the mattress.

but what he hated most of all was that he wasn’t the one in your room with you, only ever an observer.

he had the perfect view into your dorm from his current position. the flowers and leaves of the bush hiding him in the dark.

donghyun had only ever seen you from afar; the first time was an accident, he swears it was. he had found himself walking around the dark campus, taking a late night walk to ease his mind during the hectic exam season and then he saw you.

lying with your face pushed into the pillows and your ass up, using an unimpressive toy to get yourself off. the sheer curtains doing little to cover you.

he couldn't look away.

【☆】★【☆】

it had been around 3 months since then. he never interacted with you outside of these moments... (if you could even call it an interaction.) opting to be an observer and continue living your life without ever coming into contact.

he did his best to avoid you, feeling guilty after every late-night viewing. standing in the shower trying to wash away his impure actions, telling himself that he wouldn't dare go back. he did his best but fell into temptation each time.

it didn't help when you started bringing a third party into the equation.

donghyun envied dongmin. he should be the one making you feel good, your lips should be uttering his name, and your legs should be wrapped around his waist.

not dongmin's.

he even envied the older's name, shamelessly getting off as you uttered the almost identical name. he couldn't hear you, but the way your lips mixed and the syllables rolled off your tongue would make him shamelessly grip his needy member.

tonight was no different. dongmin had entered your dorm not too long ago, pinning you against your room door and wasting no time, pressing his lips against your neck.

the entry faced the window directly, meaning donghyun's view was obscured by dongmin's frame. he could only see your upper articles of clothing tossed off and the taller male marking your neck.

your head leaning back on the door as your small hand grips the back of dongmin's hair, his lips marking all over your neck and shoulders leaving no space unmarked. he watches as dongmin grips your thighs and hoists you up in the air, pushing your small frame against the door.

the older’s hips pushing up into yours as his lips come in contact with yours, leaving you breathless.

god, how he wishes that were him.

donghyun watches as dongmin tosses your figure onto the mattress, bending you over the bed and giving him the perfect view of your blissed-out face. he watches as dongmin kisses down your back and slides your underwear off, giving himself access to your sweet center.

dongmin dives down, spreading your legs to eat your cunt from behind and donghyun watches. his brows pressing together as he watches your jaw drop open, imagining the sweet sounds leaving your lips.

the thought of your essence dripping down his lips and staining his t-shirt. the scent of your center being so close, he could only dream of getting a taste. no matter how badly donghyun wants to lose himself to his pleasure, he wouldn’t dare look away from you. he couldn’t let dongmin have you all to himself.

dongmin stands up, towering over your bent figure as he presses his groin against your ass, gripping your hair and yanking you up.

donghyun groans. he couldn’t care if anyone heard, your body being on full display for him and leaving none to the imagination was everything he could ask for.

hands gripping your chest, tracing your figure. his cock sliding between your thighs and bumping your clit, making your body jump with each touch.

donghyun feels his face turn red, he doesn’t know whether or not to be angry at the fact that he isn’t experiencing this or if he’s turned on just by watching something so private. his grip around his length tightens, his pumps slowing down as his teeth grit down. he wouldn’t dare cum before you.

the stretch of dongmin’s cock has you biting down on your lip hard enough to draw blood, donghyun’s thumb brushes his tip, he knows he could fill you just as good if not better. wanting to brush against your cervix and fuck you full, make you his instead.

“dongmin! dongmin! dongmin!” the words leaving your lips make him even harder, he’s so close to being the one you like, yet so far all at the same time.

dongmin pushes down your upper body, using his grip on your head to bury your body further into the mattress, drool leaving your lips and staining the sheets.

your hands gripping onto the plush material.

“fuck.” donghyun is panting hard now. how he needs to be in you, needs you wrapped around him milking him of everything he has to give you.

and he watches you shake. watches you finish. watches you clench around another man. he watches it all.

and dongmin watches him watch.

locking his eyes with the younger boy he pulls your head up to give donghyun a good look at your blissed-out face, your eyes rolling into the back of your head as you pant rapidly. and he smirks.

he has exactly what the other can’t have.

dongmin flips you onto your back and bites down on your shoulder, his eyes still locked with donghyun’s, claiming you as his own.

donghyun can’t look away from the scene unfolding in front of him, eyes locked in on how dongmin starts to stretch you open.

the hand wrapped around his member speeds up as he watches the older ram into you, grabbing your face to make you look at him just as donghyun is cumming all over his hand, dripping down to stain his pants.

and he becomes aware of the situation, his face and ears turning red when he locks eyes with dongmin again, quickly tucking his member back into his pants and leaving the scene. promising himself he would never come back again, but he knows that isn’t true.

ᯓ★

#g0niki #rey's messy mind #taesan smut #leehan smut #boynextdoor smut #bnd smut #bnd x reader #boynextdoor x reader #kpop smut #bnd imagines #bnd oneshot #bnd scenarios #boynextdoor scenarios #boynextdoor oneshots #dongmin smut #donghyun smut #kim donghyun #han dongmin

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strawberryblue-blog · 1 day

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You don't know me —Pablo Gavi

summary: you get drunk and Gavi has to take you home but you hate each other (mostly you)

warnings: yes. alcohol consumption, bad words, enemies to lovers.

words count: +2k.

#SEXYNOTE: English is not my first language so i apologize for any spelling errors or misunderstandings.

The music blared in your ears as you continued to dance with your friends. The alcohol in your blood was responsible for your happiness and maybe you had had enough but you felt so good. It was like one of those days where you didn't care about anything but enjoying your youth, so you just enjoyed yourself. You had missed coming to dance and have fun with your friends.

The dance floor was a little small for you. You couldn't stop moving as your friends moved around you and laughed happily, dancing and drinking.

"I think it's time to go home" you heard your friend say.

"Nooooooo" you groaned as Fermin grabbed you below the waist, helping you walk.

"We need more of this" you squealed raising your glass in the air.

Lately these days you had been feeling stressed and a little sad. Exams were on the doorstep and you couldn't miss them and you were working in the evenings to support yourself. So you were coming home late in the day with a broken and tired head. So you didn't have much time to go out with friends or go dancing, you just came home to rest and go back to class in a loop.

"You'll thank me tomorrow" he said taking your bag from the table. Your other friends complained and you had to say goodbye to them even though you didn't want to leave.

Fermin, who was in charge of driving you home tonight, helped you walk back to the VIP table of the guys, who were drinking and laughing while watching the others. Buh boring. Fermin was one of your best friends since childhood, since you used to go to the same school and then upon graduation you went to the same university. Fermin was still the same kid you knew from before, only now he was a great football player and very famous but he didn't lose the essence. Although the advantage of having a famous friend was something you began to like at times. You were in one of the best clubs in Barcelona, free drinks and really rich people. You couldn't complain. Although his other friends were really boring, what was the point of being famous if you weren't going to enjoy your life? They were always there, sitting around, drinking and chatting with each other.

"I need help with this one" he announced and you laughed as you almost fell over from not being able to hold your balance.

In front of you, you could see the players watching you hiding their laughter at your ridiculous spectacle and as Fermin tried to hold you up so you wouldn't run out of his hands onto the dance floor again.

"I'll take care of the others, could someone drive her home?" you heard him ask towards his friends and you rolled your eyes.

You didn't want to be a bother to any of them, surely they had something to do with their busy celebrity lives, so you planned to take a cab home. Yes, you were drunk but nothing you couldn't handle on your own. It wasn't the first time.

"I can give her a ride, i'm leaving anyway" someone said and you could see one of his friends get up from his spot.

Pablo Gavi. The man that every woman in Spain is crazy about him. A self-centered jerk that you still couldn't get along with. Not for anything special, he just had some attitudes you didn't like, like thinking he was the center of the world, that all women were at his feet or that he was the best at his job. You really didn't understand how someone like him could be Fermín's best friend. They were such opposites.

"I'll send you her address, take care of her, brother" Fermin warned pointing to his friend.

"I don't want to leave!" you whined as your friend helped you put on your jacket. You hear a snort from the boy who was waiting behind you but you ignored him.

"You need to rest, tomorrow you'll have the worst day of your life, Y/n" he said hugging you goodbye.

You pouted and nodded resignedly.

"See you around, gentlemen" you waved them towards the other players, who waved back at you animatedly as you staggered out behind Gavi.

There were still quite a few people for it being almost closing time, so you walked carefully trying to step firmly following Gavi but the boy's back was getting further and further away from you. He didn't even bother to notice if you were behind him, he just continued on his way out of the place. Idiot.

When you crossed the door of the discotheque, you hugged your body in the cool of the night and your eyes caught sight of the young man waiting for you a little further away. His gaze was cold, disinterested. So you rolled your eyes, walking towards the edge of the street, away from him.

"What are you doing?" you heard him ask in the distance.

"Going home" you mumbled looking to your sides to see if a cab was approaching.

"The car is that way" he sighs again pointing.

Clearly you were a bother to him and you didn't want to owe any favors to any of Fermin's friends, least of all him.

"You're fucking drunk, come on" he said and you let out a wry huff.

"I'm not your concern anymore, you can go" you said again.

"I told Fermin I'd take you" he reneged coming up behind you.

"I won't tell him anything, you go your way, I'll go mine. Problem solved" you reply edgewise. You can hear him sigh angrily.

For a few seconds silence ensues, you say nothing but you can see out of the corner of your eye his figure behind you. Maybe you're being a bit airheaded but you know he's only taking you home for commitment and you'd rather not bother him honestly.

"Whatever you want" you hear him say and nod.

When you think he'll leave, because you see him move, you sigh in relief... but then hands wrap around your legs and you squeal as you're lifted off the ground. You scream as you are left face down, Gavi grabbed your legs and carried you over his shoulder, depositing his hand on your legs while the other on your back holding you up.

"Put me down!" you scream trying to kick but he stops you forcefully. "Pablo, put me down now!" you ask again screaming.

His cold hands squeeze your skin and make you shiver, how dare he? you want to hit him so bad! Your legs are uncovered in front of him and it embarrasses you, probably everyone is seeing your panties thanks to that idiot Pablo Gavi.

"I'm. going. to. kill. you" you scream over and over again, hitting his muscular back.

Damn. His muscles are really hard, you swallow saliva as you feel his firmness under your fingers. Being upside down is no doubt making you unable to think. You get to his car, where you hear him unlock it and open the passenger door, you make a move to get out of it but Gavi lifts you back up and sits you in the seat as if you were a five year old. You cross your arms over your chest and refuse to even look at him.

"Stop acting whimsical" he mutters as his arms cross your body to buckle himself in. You roll your eyes at his words and ignore him.

You are angry. You want to hit him and hit Fermin for letting you go with Gavi.

Damn it, you can't take it.

During the whole trip, you stay in your place as if you were not there, even at times your eyes close but you force yourself to stay awake. Gavi kept spying on you while driving, making sure everything was okay. The atmosphere is tense and silent, no one says a word. You're not sure if Fermin told him where you lived or how he was supposed to know the way to your house because when you realize it you start to recognize your neighborhood.

He parks in front of your building and waits a few seconds until you unbuckle your seatbelt and grab your stuff.

"Do i have to carry you all the way home too?" he says teasingly and you open the car door.

Duh duh duh duh. You want to taunt him in that sarcastic tone and curse him out but he won't take any more from you.

As you take a step outside and try to walk, you trip over your own foot and stagger but manage to grab hold of the door before you fall. You hear a low chuckle and your nerves start to make you sweat (or maybe it's the alcohol).

You tell yourself that you can and stand back up to take another step. The worst thing is that you know Gavi is watching you with his smile judging you and makes you want to die right there. Sure, he's a perfect guy who has never come home drunk enough to make a fool of himself.

When you manage to take a few steps away from the car, you start looking in your purse for your building key but start gasping when your hands can't find it. You pick up everything, cards, lipstick, chewing gum, bills but can't find it. Damn, did it all have to happen to you now? You hear Gavi get out of the car and you rush to look for the key starting to curse in whispers.

A sigh of relief leaves your mouth as you grab them from the bottom of your purse, my god. If it wasn't for the fact that you were controlling yourself you probably would have screamed with happiness when you pulled them out.

You walk to the big door and open it, hearing footsteps behind you approach. You turn and see the young man with his hands in his pockets, watching you. As your eyes make contact with his, your stomach churns and your throat goes dry. why is he still here?

"T-thank you for bringing me" you thank him stammering.

"I'll come up with you, i have to make sure you get home and don't fall on the way" he says slowly.

Did you look that bad? How could he think you needed a ride home? Yes, you were drunk. But you could, you had managed to walk here by yourself and open the door. Taking the elevator and getting into the house couldn't be impossible, could it? You didn't understand why he cared so much if he hardly ever cared about you. It seemed that he was also intent on bothering you.

"Whatever you want" you repeat like him before and roll your eyes making room to let him pass.

You turn to start walking and your world turns upside down, making you stagger again from the sudden movement. Fuck, you shouldn't have drunk so much. Not when you hadn't had a drink in so long, you'd clearly lost your taste.

His hands help support you, placing them on your hips. His touch is warm and when his fingers press against your skin, your legs tremble and you're not sure it's from the alcohol especially. He is so close to you that you can hear his breaths, his scent invades your nostrils and you swallow saliva trying to assimilate.

You are paralyzed as if your mind had stopped working, when his hands move a little, helping you back on your feet. You are thankful he is behind you because you feel your face burning, your lips tremble as you feel his warmth next to yours and you don't understand what is happening to you. You keep walking towards the elevator still without seeing him, you will die of embarrassment if you do, he is surely enjoying this and can mock you forever.

The elevator doors open and you enter first going to the side, seeing how Gavi enters inside the metal box as well. He is untouched, sporting his perfect hairstyle, his well-ironed, clean, quality clothes, his face looks uncluttered, fresh. For some reason thinking about him makes you feel discomfort in your belly as if something is fluttering inside you. You sigh as the doors come off and you mark your floor, looking to your side seeing the boy standing next to you.

Pablo turns to look at you and when he catches you looking at him he smiles a little, you feel your neck burn with embarrassment but for some reason you can't stop looking at him. It's as if you study his every move, watching him there, standing next to you, hands in his pockets, expressionless.

You turn slightly, leaning against the metal wall your back against it and turn your attention back to him. You suddenly feel like talking but don't know what to say.

"How does it feel to be famous?" you ask curiously.

He lifts his shoulders indifferently. Is he really a cocky idiot like everyone says? They always say that footballers are narcissistic, self-centered and womanizers. Many claim that Gavi is one of them. Curiosity killed the cat and you're honestly dying to know.

"You must have a very big ego" you say somewhat sarcastically.

He sighs as if he's tired of you and that makes you want to keep pestering him.

"Actually, no" he says in response and turns around facing you.

"Of course you'll say that" you click your tongue. "At the end of the day you're Pablo Gavi" you roll your eyes laughing.

His eyes narrow trying to understand your answer and the sound of the sound that came to your floor announces itself, opening the doors. You straighten up taking a step to leave but when you try to cross, his hand stops you. You swallow as you see how his hand is almost close to your belly, brushing against you and the memories of him carrying you in the discotheque come back to your head. Out of the corner of your eye you see him so close to you, you tremble, he has presence on you and you are attentive to any movement he makes.

His hand now encircles your body and he pushes you into a corner against the wall as the elevator closes its doors again after a few seconds of waiting. Your back slams against the metal wall again as his body presses against yours.

"Do you have a fucking problem with me?" he asks harshly and you raise your head to face him.

Your heart is pounding as if you've just finished running a marathon. Your palms sweat, you even feel your pulse tremble and you know the alcohol isn't to blame for that... it's Gavi. Words get stuck in your throat when you try to speak, it's as if your conscience doesn't respond on its own.

Still, you raise your jaw to face him, you will not show him fear, you will not show him weakness. Even though you feel like every atom of you wants to fade away because of his closeness.

He waits for an answer, because he keeps looking at you through his dark eyes, serious and agonizing. Your exposed chest rises and falls at the lack of air between you, you begin to suffocate beneath him and if you don't respond right now, he will have won.

"I don't like you, just that" you admit feigning harshness.

Gavi lets out a wry huff, smiling a little.

"You don't know me" he says edgeily, gritting his teeth. His neck is red and you can see his veins starting to mark through his pale skin. For god's sake.

But he was right, you don't know him at all. Although you could deduce what kind of person he was from so few things.

"And I don't want to" you spit getting closer to her face to show her that you can be tough too and not just another one of his pile.

You're so angry that you're not afraid. In fact it doesn't bother you to be so close to him, you just want to face him, you want to hurt him. If he was a normal person, you probably would have broken his heart with those words but you're not dealing with just any person.

In front of you, Pablo Gavi smiles licking his lips in mockery. He's not just any man, he's one of those who don't break easily and that everyone fears.

But not you.

Kiss him. You hear your thoughts and freeze. Damn, did you drink too much? or not enough? because right now you're losing your mind.

Words become null and void. You can only hear your breaths in front of each other. The atmosphere is tense, suffocating and even toxic. You are both angry, full of adrenaline and about to explode.

Without realizing it, your movements come to life and you grab his neck from behind and pull him close to you in a matter of seconds, without thinking. Your lips collide with his and you kiss wildly.

The grip on your waist presses your bodies together and you gasp at the sensation of his fingers squeezing you.

You melt into the heat of a bold, hard and hot kiss. You waste no time fighting to touch each other and your hands trying to hold onto each other any way you can. You are desperate as if you were two hunters before a prey, killing by hunger. You both touch, kiss, feel each other, enjoying the moment. His hand sinks into your legs and helps you lift it over his body as you keep trying to touch him, your skin feeling his hard muscles.

Sparks shoot from your bodies, you are so desperate that you don't notice that you are still inside the elevator. The minutes pass like shooting stars but you don't stop kissing.

You will definitely have the worst day of your life tomorrow and you really wish all the alcohol you drank today was enough to not remember any of this.

Otherwise, you won't be able to live with it.

#football imagines #imagine #football one shot #fc barcelona #pablo gavi #pablo gavi x y/n #pablo gavi x reader #pablo gavi x you #gavi x reader #gavi

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majorproblems77 · 2 days

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Sacred realm update! so I'm back!

Hi all!

Hope your doing well! :D

Only a few days late, Exam season man, what can you do?

This update shows link and Time Escaping. And time having... a Time....

Alright, now for the important stuff! Sacred realm belongs to @zelda-the-sacred-realm, and all art from the comics belongs to the comic artist. I've got their permission to do these! I love the comic so much its so good and so well done!

The link to the update can be found here! You should go reblog it, it's great, give it some love, please? :D

Let's do this, grab your popcorn and your water. Let's go! :D

Cinnamon roll Link strikes again, Clearly, the big purple guy just wants a hug!

oh no...

Panic!

Time's little superhero slide here.

Also, it must be said he's doing all this while carrying an adult. (Or close enough.) I know he's a spirit and all but that's VERY impressive!

You know when you're reading and you can hear the atmosphere, you can hear the moment that a breath is held. And time stands still.

This. The moment in a movie when everything stops before the action picks up in another way.

The talent it takes to get it from still images. I just am in awe.

Pure fear from Link.

Props to Time here for remaining calm while he's got the cinnamon roll here just scared out of his mind.

Time... Being reassuring?

Wow.

This is important I think for these two's relationship. The need to protect someone only comes to people who dont really hate someone. Before this, I'm pretty sure Link doesn't think Time cares too much about him.

Why would he right? Time's been nothing but cold to him.

(More on this later)

Link getting cocooned in Time's cloak is just, everything to me. It's such a caring more from him. (Even if it is a you can't die thing)

Ouch, that's gotta hurt

Oh man, this man is like... low-key gripping onto him.

Excuse me while I cry a little?

Twilightttttt ;-;

DIRECT FAMILY CONNECTION

EXCUSE ME WHILE I CRY MORE? ;-;-;-;

TIME? OH YOU POOR MAN

This reaction gives me father-son vibes but with time and Link, it's giving me life because oh my god these two.

Link is a cinnamon roll and must be protected.

PFFFFFFTTTT

Rip

This made me laugh I won't lie. Damit Time I was rooting for some Dad Time in this world.

Says the 'Small cinnamon roll with scared of everything issues.'

I love him but ohhhh man Time is gonna kill you

SEE

RUN LINK

RUN

Link, poor guy. Man needs help okay.

This map is interesting, I reckon is a list of the first three heroes we meet.

That top one is Skyloft. With Hylia and the floating island. - For Sky. who we met first.

The middle one has someone holding The double helix sword... That's the fierce deity on the middle level. We know Time has a connection to the Fierce deity mask. And in turn the deity himself. So this middle level is Time.

And that lower one.

If im right, This is the Twilight realm, and we will find ourselves there soon. The people look similar to the 'Link' we see on the land level to an extent while still holding a semblance of individuality.

Its almost, inverted? Like the twilight people were. Rather than looking different different.

I'm excited to see where this goes.

Also

Hi it's later

So I'm a sucker for visual storytelling in backgrounds and I think this might be more than an exploration into the depths beneath the ice.

Starting with this.

I think this, is Time being vulnerable.

The break from a cold icy exterior to something a little more personal.

Funny how when Time begins to see more personal stuff, he has more visions of the past.

The trigger has him almost scared, just look at him.

Why would Time be scared, if he didn't care?

Time appears to carry a lot of guilt around Twilight.

And when Link calls him out on it, he returns to that icy exterior, not allowing himself the opportunity to be vulnerable again.

And I wonder if that has to be explored before he can take his place within the medallion. Trials by fire, as they are so suitably called, can be for the spirits as much as Link.

Just a thought tho.

That's all from me! Hope you have a great day! :D

#comic analysis with major #ramble corner with major #zelda sacred realm #zeldathesacredrealm #sacred realm #sr twilight #loz sr #sr realms #sr time #i love this comic #Writing these brings me almost as much joy as Sky does #And that's saying something #because in every iteration dear god does he bring me joy #ztsr #hero of time #hero of realms #sacred realm analysis #this comic brings me so much joy

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thirstyforsimonghostriley · 1 day

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Simon (Ghost) Riley x reader

So sorry I haven't posted in a while I've been really busy with School and work! This week I have a study week (For exams but oh well) So I'll try and post more but anyway, This is just a cute little wholesome imagine cause I Fucking Love Domesticated Simon. (Also Yes this was a bit rushed so its not that Detailed and also there may be spelling Mistakes English is not my first language and I'm dyslexic.) Also the Divider is by @cafekitsune

(ALSO from the first “your beautiful Simon” to the second there is a TIME SKIP!! So no lol he didn’t just magically start fucking the reader

16+ ONLY!! - Smut warning! - Insecurities!!

Simon Riley was a private person sure, He kept his face hidden at work (Task Force 141) and pretty much everywhere else. When asked about it he wouldn't really speak about it just give a grumbled "Nunya fuck off" or if he wasn't in a horrible mood he'd answer "Protection.", But that wasn't really the case, Being in the Military for so long he was bound to have some injuries when he joined the SAS (Special Air Service) He broke his nose a few times causing it to heal crooked, Sure Simon wasn't the most handsome guy but he wasn't that bad looking until his nose got all fucked up, it made his whole face look out of proportion and he was so insecure about it that he would refuse to look at himself in the mirror unless he had to shave, That was until he met you after building up his trust (Very very slowly) He finally built up the guts to show you his face, He almost expected you to run away screaming because of how hideous he felt but instead? You smiled up at him bringing your hands up to his face tracing your fingers over it, His jaw, His cheeks, His lips, his eyebrows, His nose, his ears. You leaned in and kissed him gently whispering "Simon You're Beautiful" Gently against his lips.

"Fuck say it again," Simon grunted against your ear as he re-positioned himself moving his hands to the thick of your thighs pushing you further into the bed and he continued to snap his hips brutally into your weeping cunt, "Y-you're Beautiful Simon." you almost hissed out at the pace of his hips as he groaned into your ear once again before filling you up. After he watched as you slept against his chest brushing your hair out of your face gently with his thick calloused hands, That night for the first time in almost 5 years he spent longer than 20 seconds looking at himself in the mirror.

#simon ghost riley #ghost cod #simon riley #simon riley x reader #ghost

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whentherewerebicycles · 2 days

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How is motherhood (so far)? It seems like such a crazy shift from one life to another!

it is SO good so far!!! here are some scattered feelings & thoughts:

i have been warned that a big hormone crash is coming and i am sure that will be tough to weather! but right now i am feeling so good - still just riding that endorphin high. i feel physically good too, like tired and a little sore, but really way better than i expected to feel three days after giving birth.

my transition into parenthood has been majorly eased by the fact that my mom is here and is doing virtually all of the newborn care tasks for me right now - nighttime feedings (i take over around 5am but my hands are so bad in the night), diaper changes, tracking how much he's eating, making food, etc. she is even helping me breastfeed because it involves a level of manual dexterity i am not currently capable of most of the time. i am so so so so so so grateful to have her here. part of me feels kind of guilty, like i'm probably supposed to be feeling way more stressed out and overwhelmed trying to manage the cognitive and physical demands of new parenthood, but i am trying to quiet that voice in my brain by reminding myself that there are going to be PLENTY of times in the future where i'll get to feel overwhelmed and exhausted and in over my head as a single parent. she is so happy and so excited to do this for me, and i am trying to just let myself rest and enjoy it.

it is so special to do this with my mom. i was saying to her yesterday, like, i can totally see how taking care of a new baby with a partner would be a richly meaningful experience, and i can see that there are things i am missing out on on that front. but also if i were doing this with a partner i wouldn't get to be doing this with my mom, and i would be missing out on an experience that i am finding just as richly meaningful and rewarding. i feel so close to her and i love her so much and i know that for the rest of my life i am going to remember how special it was to get to watch her love owen so much and take such good care of him (and me) in his first days of life. i feel so lucky. i thought i would feel SO overwhelmed but instead i just feel really loved and taken care of, and i feel really close to my mom, and i feel like we are the happiest little family unit right now. i love it so much. also she calls him "my little guy" and “my best friend” and i almost cry every time. hormones but also love, you know.

owen is perfect. i feel like i felt intensely close to him right after the birth, and then i had kind of a hard first day after in the hospital where there were just TOO MANY PEOPLE coming in at all hours and doing exams on me or on him, and there was no time to rest and bond with him, and i started feeling very overwhelmed and kinda like do i even KNOW this baby? this baby is a STRANGER to me and if i hadn't had a baby i would be at HOME right now in my own SPACE without anyone coming in every 15 min day and night to bother me. that first long hospital day was really rough and then i was relieved to finally get home that night but also super cranky and tired, and i couldn't figure out how to get my pump to work, and he got very fussy in the night and i was like AAAAAAA. but then we spent all of yesterday doing so much skin-to-skin cuddling and napping in bed which is just the nicest thing imaginable, and now i am like this is my BABY he is PERFECT look at him!!!! he is so snuggly and good.

i am glad that my brother had a newborn a couple months before i did because i think it helped prepare me for how gently boring the newborn stage can be lol. not in a bad way! it's so sweet and i think will involve lots of wonderful sleepy snuggling!! but they are awake so infrequently and do not have personalities yet, and you are kind of like hm. should more be happening, or...? but no. nothing more should be happening lol they will just be sweet sleepy lumps for a good long time. my nephew is nine? ten? weeks old now and is definitely starting to become way more alert/engaged, so i know a personality is coming haha and i will just enjoy my little sweet lump right now because he won't be like this ever again!! also it's nice to be able to just let him sleep next to me while i do other stuff. i think it will ease the transition a bit... like yes now we are on this endless cycle of pumping, attempting to breastfeed, bottlefeeding him, changing him, watching him sleep, pumping again, etc but i can read or watch stuff in between because he requires so little attention while sleeping (except for LOTS OF KISSES he requires LOTS OF LITTLE KISSES because he is so SWEET!!!!). also idk i am sure i will get bored of being off work but right now it has been so restful to delete outlook & teams from my phone and just be like who cares about weird office politics i have way more important things to do like kiss a sleeping baby on the forehead a hundred times and tell him he is the best and handsomest boy in the whole world. life is very good lol.

#baby tag

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entamewitchlulu · 2 days

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I wasn't initially going to say anything, but i. honestly, i really just, could use some emotional support, i guess.

there's an awful lot going on in my life right now that's making me pretty miserable. to top it off, I recently got news from my dad that our dog, Indiana's health has gotten a pretty bad prognosis. the long story short is, he could possibly have cancer, and while there's surgery that could help, he's 15 years old, and even the prep exam for the surgery could be fatal for him. so it's unlikely that we'll end up going through with it, and a really hard decision has to be made about whether to let him go now while things are still mostly okay, or wait until things deteriorate.

I moved away from home for the first time just six months ago, and one of the things I was most upset about was leaving my dog behind, knowing he was getting old. I live an hour and a half away from home now, and I have been able to go home to visit just once in that time. I've seen him only once in the last six months.

Indiana is everything to me. I know he can't be with us forever, but the pain of not being able to be there during the last months of his life is destroying me. I have no idea what things are going to look like, if we'll have another year or two with him being in the world, or if I'm looking at a world where he isn't there anymore as soon as the next few weeks. I'm working 40 hours a week and I have a cat to think about now, so I can't just drop everything and go home to be near him for a while as much as I want to.

I'm not asking for anything in this post like surgery money or anything. Just......support, I guess. Living alone means there's no one to give me a hug most days, and I'm coping badly with it all. It's just another piece of bad news that's breaking me, and all I want is to feel a little less alone in facing it.

I just want people to know how much I love him. He is the sweetest, kindest, most loving dog I've ever known. He was found in a junkyard living in a truck and when we adopted him he didn't even have a name, just a number which was the date he was taken in by the shelter. He has a tiny little tail that wiggles like crazy when he's happy. He loves sitting in the car, not even to go anywhere, just to hang out. He's a huge fan of cheese and memorized the sound of a cheese stick opening so that he could get a small bite of mine whenever I had one. He's so good at "shake" that when you have a treat for him, he will paw the air wildly with one paw and then the other to show you just how good he is at doing it and how much he deserves his treat. Sometimes he gets the zoomies so insanely that he has to bolt all around the yard, in and out the door so fast that you'd think he was a cheetah in another life. He can turn on a dime. He's scared of fireworks and loud sounds because we made the mistake of taking him with us to a historical reenactment once and all the muskets and cannons scared him. He learned how to pull a cart once but we never kept up with it. He knows the word "rabbit" and loves to chase them around but never catches them. When he's happy to see you he'll press his whole head into your knees and lean so much that he almost knocks you over. He likes to press his whole body against you. When he lays down he sometimes splays his paws out to either side like a seal. His favorite toy is his stuffed rabbit and he cuddles with it all by himself.

I love him, so, so, so, so much. I can't be with him right now and it's killing me. I'm grieving him before he's even gone because I can't comprehend a world where he isn't in it and I don't know how else to prepare myself.

I don't know how to end this. He's still with us right now, but I don't know for how much longer. Please hug your pets for me tonight. Hold them close and remind them how much you love them. We don't get to have them in our lives forever as unfair as it is. I only wish it could be a little longer.

#lulu talks #pet death tw #i mean. not yet. god. but the mention is there.#fuck. i can't believe we just have to keep going to work every day while the world is ending.

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ef-1 · 6 days

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red | 03/01/2000?

+ yeah a hug is cool but sometimes you need to have a mental breakdown, send your friend photos of yourself crying and get told you look cunt

#not having a good May which is a bummer given its only the 19th but we persevere #everything is red etc #index:rows #1. moodboards and sunburns #2. kill all the banks and the kind of drinks that give you palpitations after a law exam #3. vitamin water and flats that are cooler than mine #4. my friends new car which is apparently suspended in time almost 2 years before i was born and red shoes #(100 dollars and a cigar to the person who can guess if thats an enchante hoodie (it is))#photography series #this is not chronological and not all from may.

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questionablealibi · 7 months

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HI im still here! Heres an elias from a scrapped panel for the spooky-month oneil and elias thingie im doing ^^

#Its been a busy month 🥹#Almost zero time for socials and saying hi online #Next week is our first periodical exams and we have multiple projects with the same deadline :'D #I currently have to go out at 1pm to meet up with my groupmates and work on two of said projects #Heres an elias before i go back to being temporarily inactive #Im really sorry i didnt give a proper heads up for my hiatus :'D #I hope you lot are doing well! Eat and hydrate properly! 🫶#the stanley parable #tspud #tsp #tsp stanley #tspud stanley #Alibi!

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spookythesillyfella · 16 days

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★* GET MOTIVATED !!!! ^_^ ★*

#wowie !!! summer is almost here !!! it's almost june !!!#it's almost the time i have to give my exams !!!#the exams that i will most certainly not pass !!!#i just wish i could drop off the face of the earth right this instant !!!! it would be the loveliest thing if i could !!!!#im embarrassed by my mere existence !! nothing would change in the world if i was gone !!#yaay !!! >_<#dhmis #dhmis art #dhmis au #high voltage au #dhmis sketchbook #dhmis hv sketchbook #vent art #bright colors #cw bright colors #silly guy #:3

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yohankang · 3 months

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hiiii besties i'm back <3

#god it's been almost a month of me not posting?? (except for my personal updates) oops #i just wanted to say i just passed my last exam #i passed all of them with flying colours hehe #but i haven't slept for more than 6 hours at night for more than a month and i feel like i'm getting sick #work has been tough too and i failed one job interview... i have less than 3 weeks to find another job but i'm not giving up!!#also i already told everyone at work that i'm leaving and i cried A LOT this week...#but don't worry it was because they were so sweet and supportive :')#so today i'm going to watch a movie and relax #and tomorrow i will finally go for a walk!!! a long walk!!!#and i'm going to waste my time on tumblr (i say that with love) and reblog all the posts i've missed for the past month #and reply to your messages and asks <3 #i missed you!!!!#k.txt #oh wait nvm i forgot it's sanremo finale today asdfghjh i'm going to have fun reading my italian mutuals' posts

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definitelynotnia · 2 months

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im sorry i have to rant im so fucking pissed

my exams end on 19th and I have to get rid of some books and buy some books which are quite pricy online so I had planned on going to college street on 20th and selling my books and buying the new ones at a cheap price and i was frankly really excited about it because all I get is a one day break to relax bcz i have to start studying for entrances from 21st so all I have is 20th and i wanted to spend it at college street and then get some food and basically have like a solo date kind of thing.

and i was so so excited about it i told my boyfriend about it like 500 times bcz i kept forgetting i've already mentioned it and it was literally on my mind a lott so i kept bringing it up and ik it seems like not a big deal cz i can just sit at home and chill too but i literally do not get to go outside my house. like- the last time i went out was new years eve and after that the only time i've gone out is to school or to give my boards that is it. my mother has some weird like problem wiht me going out like even if i tell her that i just want to go to our terrace for 5 minutes just to get some fresh air she won't even allow that she'll be all suspicious and like sTaNd In ThE bAlCOnY aNd TaKe FrEsH aIr like she herself doesnt leave the house (and blames it on me and my brother ???? when have we ever stopped you bro, she said I HaVe To Be HeRe To KeEp An EyE like im 18 i dont need to be watched 24/7 stop blaming me for choices you put upon yourself) and i just feel so suffocated ALL THE TIME i feel so overstimulated and im so sick of rotting on my bed and i dont want to wait for some birthday party or friends meet up to be able to leave my goddamn house i just wanted to go and have a fun day and get me some books thats it.

anyway so initially the plan was that my mom would go along but something came up so she wanted to postpone it to 21st and i didn't want to bcz i'd already be missing 3 days bcz of my boyfriends birthday, holi and my brothers birthday (all of which are important and i dont want to miss which makes me the villain apparently bcz i should "adjust" and cancel my "parties" instead of trying to stick to my plan bcz that makes me too demanding and selfish apparently) so i suggested that ukw why dont u go do ur thing which came up and i'll go to college street by myself...which is when the solo date idea came which i had really wanted all along but didnt bring up bcz i knew she'd say no but now there's a valid reason for me to go alone so like, its a pretty easy fix i can just go alone but noooo. First of all,

I've been to college street multiple times before so its not like its an unknown area to me

im going by metro which is quite safe

im going when there is stark daylight and i will return home much much before it gets dark and im literally 18

she never lets me go anywhere alone, not even take ubers alone if i want to get back from somewhere my bf has to come drop me everytime and then go backwards to his house which is so so so stupid and i never get to go out alone unless accompanied by family or by a male friend, so obv when i said i'll go to college street alone she refused to let that happen and started screaming about how 'if its so important to go on 20th bcz u dont want to miss a day of studying then cancel ur 'parties' and study then' and i was like no its not about missing a day its just that there's a very easy and logical fix to this problem which is i go alone and its not inconveniencing anyone so why cant i just do that but she will not listen to that bcz im 'adamant' and 'everything has to be according to me' bcz i found a viable solution to the problem. so instead of letting me just go she was literally ready to pay much more money and buy the books online, like.....why cant i just go bro??? (and she keeps telling me im a waste of her money bcz i will amount to nothing in life and my education was a failed investment or wtv so like now why are u wasting more money??? im literally trying to save the money that u 'waste' on me so just let me ???)

anyway i called my dad last night and told him and he was super ok with the idea he said its a good idea that i go alone and that he would speak to her but then today when i asked her if dad spoke to her she said yes, we'll go on 20th and i was like .....we? so apparently she CANCELLED her previously immovable thing for which she wanted me to cancel my 'parties', she cancelled that and agreed to go with me on 20th just so that i dont get to go alone- like ???????????????? what is ur problemmmm

so obv i was super annoyed and i went on a whole ass rant about how i literally struggle to even cross roads bcz i dont know shit about basic travelling bcz all my life ive been in a car and its a running joke with all my guy friends that i 'cannot navigate' and 'dont know any places' and obv??? if im never allowed to go anywhere then how tf will i know the places- the only places i know is bcz recently i've been paying a lot of attention and asking my dad stuff about what roads to take to reach certain places and when i go out with my friends i kind of try and learn a bit but thats it i've only ever gone alone completely alone to two places which is my beauty parlour thats 5 minutes away from my house and one bazaar one time that was 2 bus stops away, thats it. thats my extent of public travelling alone. and now im supposed to go to a whole new STATE for college and i cant even call myself an auto without struggling. and like- is this not a basic life skill??? like ok yeah its not rocket science and i will probably figure it out even if i start later in life but why not now? most of my guy friends literally go everywhere alone, why not me? and my dad agreed with all of this but my mom was just like "you'll be in the hostel only, no need to go out of the campus" like ARE YOU FOR REAL????????? and she's like "if u want to learn skills learn how to cook" like ok yes i will also learn how to cook for sure but i wont have a fucking kitchen in the hostel but somehow cooking is an urgent skill i should learn but going places by myself is unimportant bcz i should just never? leave? the? hostel?

anyway after much screaming and shouting my dad gave up and just cut the call bcz he doesnt want to get into an argument with my mother and my mother was being all suspicious like why do u hAvE tO gO aLoNe AlL oF a SuDdEn even though i literally explained why i want to do this alone but she doesnt think thats valid. so she refuses to let me go and i asked her for one reason why i shouldnt cz usuallt its always "no u have exam what if smthn happens" but now i literally dont even have exam so whats ur excuse now? streets will always be unsafe forever so "what if smthn happens" is not a reason to never let me go out without a man so just gimme one reason and she couldnt give me a single reason she just said "i said no, thats it".

and now she's gone off about how im useless and blah blah and "high maintainance" bcz i want books and "everyone else (some pishi's son) just studies online" and so the whole option of college street is apparently now cancelled and she's trying to set up a whole ass kindle account (half the books i need arent even available as ebooks) just because i wanted to go by myself.

#in our house kids dont stay outside past 6:30pm'' but now all of a sudden its fine for my brother to play #till 10:30 at night #she literally stopped me permanently from going down in the evenings since i was in class 7-8 #this is why ive never had any friends outside of school bcz she wouldnt let me leave ths fucking house #and now that my brother is in class 7 #he's allowed to be out playing with his friends till 10 freaking 30 #he comes home an hour late sometimes...45 minutes and almost always at least 30 minutes late at NIGHT and she says nothing except like #one sentence #yeah im only the villain i only keep u locke #up in the house its all my fault #this is just so damn unfair #like literally insulting #im not a child what is her problem #what sort of fucking solution is 'never leave the hostel' like ok even if i do that what happens then??? after i graduate?#i'll be a 24 year old who doesnt know shit about going from one place to another without a man present]#and then this woman preaches how she 'always raises her son and daughter equally' like srsly shut the fuck up #my whole life i've been told abar late?''#and for me bcz i would come home 5-10 minutes late nd i did it maybe once or twice she made me completely stop going down to play #5-10 minutes late from 6:30 wherein he comes an hour late from 9 fucking 30 #and this sounds so stupid bcz im an 18 year old now and i dont give a fuck abt how long i got to play but its just unfair dude #with me it was always smthn or the other either exams or she gets miraculously sick every time i want to go out to play #im not even kidding she did a whole “i have fever and ur going to leave me like this and go play?” on me one time bcz i was adamant abt goi #after months of not being able to go bcz of exam or smthn or the other #she did not have any fever it was fucking bullshit #and how am i supposed to help with ur imaginary fever anyway im literally 12 #its so fucking annoying man and then if i say anything at all she'll go on a tirade about how #like YOU DO THOUGH??????? im sorry ur feelings are hurt bcz i said you do smthn that u LITERALLY DO #istg not even 2 days ago she was having a fight with my dad abt how he should teach my brother to learn how to cycle so that he can go buy #groceries #i can cycle

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