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#it do be making me cackle tho
e-adlirez · 18 days
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Treasure Seekers 2 go brrrrr
So this sequel... exists :D
Welcome to the second entry in the Treasure Seekers trilogy that I'm gonna ramble about for the next six hours (in me time, in you time it's probably gonna be like thirty minutes or less), if you wanna read it yourself before reading this ramble, here's an Archive copy. Otherwise, enjoy the ride :D
So our story begins with the Thea Sisters locked in a basement in the dark, with Russia's penchant for matches (and the basement's lack of a smoke alarm) coming in clutch. Seems like another vacation's gone awry for them :3 How could it have possibly turned out this way?
Flashback: so the girls are vibing in Moscow, visiting all the cool sights and all that, Pam is wanting to try some Russian cuisine, when they spot this girl that's wearing what appears to be a barrette that used to belong to Aurora's sister Hannah Lane. They follow her a bit, find a THUG JUMPSCARE, follow the girl, Cassidy and co into the building they're heading into, and oh dear door with passcode is in the way. They find this dood Sergei, explain to him the situation, deal with him being like "who is u, and wth are you on about mate" until they hear a scream and oh dear turns out that girl with the barrette is Sergei's sister Irina and she's in trouble.
Sergei opens the door, they go in, walk in on Cassidy, Stan and Max (who I will from now call SM for simplicity) doing their whole thug jumpscare thing and kidnapping Irina in 4K. SM somehow rolls a high enough strength roll (or the girls roll a low enough initiative) that two roughly intimidating guys successfully trap six people into a basement without breaking a sweat get yourself some self-defense classes girls oml, and that's the end of that.
Luke's up to his shenanigans again, and it seems that he's targeted Irina Lenenko for the same reason the girls double-taked at the sight of her barrette: Irina (and Sergei in conjunction) is a descendant of Hannah Lane, and Hannah Lane may or may not have known a thing or two about one of the seven treasures. It's such a shame tho that Irina doesn't wanna spill any of the tea. What's this about a "queen's jewel"?
Oh also Luke has Aurora's third diary. I would like you to pay attention to this detail in particular. Oh and he's keeping Irina ratgrabbed until she tells them what he wants to know from her. Oh naur
Meanwhile the girls infodump all of the TS 1 LANE LOORRREEEE to Sergei in one whole sitting and finally manage to get around to "what the hell does this have to do with my sister". Sergei thinks it's not really possible for Irina to know anything about great-grandma Hannah's involvement with Aurora, but Irina's still in trouble soooo time to solve this nerdy-ass science trivia keypad puzzle to get outa the basement. Irina's nowhere to be found in the lab itself, so they regroup at Sergei's place to use his phone tracker app on his computer.
Bad news, SM dumped Irina's phone somewhere in the lab so the tracker app is useless; good news, while looking for some Lane Lore™ to get some context about the situation, the girls find some Lane Lore™ :D
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Turns out Aurora was looking for one of the seven treasures again, y'know just updating her sister on that, who'd moved to Saint Petersburg with her husband Ivan.
Seems like Aurora's quest at the time involved "the queen's jewel", which Aurora said she was 1000% down to ramble about to Hannah, maybe when she's done finding all seven treasures and hiding them from Jan.
I would like to take this moment to remind you that Aurora is a British Amelia Earhart, and if you dunno what that means, look up what Earhart was famous for and then look at this with that given context :']
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With that lead, the girls plus Sergei take a ride on presumably the Krasnaya Strela night train to Saint Petersburg, read some Lane Lore on the way, Peter-Griffin upon realizing that they spent the whole night reading AO3 fanfics Aurora's diaries and it's like 2AM now, land in Saint Petersburg, stop by Nevsky Prospekt Street to have some breakfast (I think they went to Venezia?), and discussion.
(For the rest of this review, please assume when I say "the girls", I'm including Sergei because Sergei tags along with them and helps them out in their entire journey. It's okay, Sergei may be biologically male but he is an honorary female in our hearts /j)
Aurora mentioned the queen's jewel in her diary, and when you're in Russia, the first queen that comes to mind is Catherine II, so maybe something relating to her? Some Lane Lore of Aurora taking interest in Catherine II's Amber Room in her palace specifically confirms their theories, sooooooooo it's time to go to the Amber Room to see if Aurora left any clu--
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The girls are about to walk out of the Catherine Palace to Peter Griffin in private when SM JUMPSCARE--
So SM is stalkin' around the Catherine Palace looking for something, so the girls stalk them back and follow them out of the palace, into a car (the girls called a separate taxi to follow them), and to a little gray building in the outskirts of the city. They don't follow SM into the building because it might be dangerous, but Irina's scarf lying around near the premises confirms that Irina was in fact there and possibly being held hostage in the building.
The girls do a little tactic I like to call "the Ding Dong Ditch": Pam and Nicky knock on the door, SM answers it, do a little Metal Gear exclamation point "HOW DID YOU GET HERE", Nicky and Pam book it so SM chases them, and that's literally how the other girls plus Sergei sneak into the building to get Irina out. (You dunno how badly I wanted to make a videogame reference for this but I couldn't find anything so here we are--)
With that, the girls plus the Lenenko siblings book it outa there without SM being none the wiser (seriously it doesn't even cross their mind that there are more than two Thea Sisters, that's how dum they are). Irina books a hotel room at a friend's place and gives them some extra Lane Lore that she never told Klawitz despite the interrogations:
Hannah Lane was once visited by Aurora unexpectedly, a little after Hannah and her husband moved to a house near the Ob River, in Siberia. Possible lead :3c? The girls think maybe, so they decide to head on over to the exact address in Novosibirsk, Siberia.
In Siberia, the girls cross the frozen Ob River in Novosibirsk to this abandoned little house, where they find this little note with a riddle that talks about Cleopatra and an emerald she had at one point, and CASSIDY JUMPSCARE--
Cassidy busts in, snatches the note and books it away on her snowmobile before the girls can even react. You may be wondering, how the hell did Cassidy get there and know where they were? The answer is the same as the reason behind the SM jumpscares in Russia and in book 1, and that is Luke.
Luke Von Klawitz is doing a little segment that I like to call: Luke Touch Grass, where it becomes increasingly clear that Luke's spent way too much time on 4Chan (/j but you'll see what I mean). Luke hears about SM's failure and facepalms. Then he calls his friend Petrovski, who has access to the database of all of Russia's airports, for help tracking down "six mice leaving Saint Petersburg". Petrovski gives him results in minutes: the girls and Sergei are leaving Saint Petersburg and heading for Novosibirsk, Siberia (most likely Tolmachevo Airport). With that intel, Klawitz looks into his own database of Aurora Beatrix Lane, finds a picture of Hannah and Aurora together, and uses his own version of Google Lens to figure out the exact coordinates where the picture was taken, which happens to be in Novosibirsk, Siberia.
No this man does not in fact canonically touch grass on the regular, who's asking
Anyway so he sent Cassidy the coords, instructions and Aurora's diary to go, and that's how Cassidy walked in on the girls in that little abandoned hut next to Ob River. Only thing is uh, she dropped her purse on the way out. A purse that just so happened to contain Aurora's diary that Luke gave her.
So the girls scoop that puppy up and assume that the treasure is Cleopatra's emerald, thus they think it's in Egypt.
So the girls go to Egypt :D (29 and a half hour flight there good god no wonder they conked out in the plane--)
The girls read some Lane Lore, something about Aurora finding the treasure and hiding it somewhere in a desert, in an "expanse pure and white" that a star compass will lead to. First thing the girls think of at the desert bit is the White Desert (Sahara el Beyda), specifically a spot near Cleopatra's pool, so they leave the airport (not realizing Cassidy is following them now) and head over to a market to buy some supplies because might I remind you, they initially went to Moscow, Russia for vacation.
While in the market, Pam meets a guy named Omar. Pam tells him a little bit about them going to Cleopatra's pool in Sahara el Beyda, and she finds out that Omar just so happens to be an Archaeology major in Oxford University who's here on his summer vacation and works as a guide for Sahara el Beyda, and is more than down to give the girls a tour. Talk about lucky :D
The next day the girls take the scenic route and after a while make it to Siwa, where Omar books a room in a hotel for them, and the girls find this interesting myth there about Cleopatra that I will summarize here:
Cleopatra was once given a jewel that maxes out the owner's rizz and the effect is supposedly indefinite. Cleopatra liked the jewel so much that she wore it on her crown at all times... until she grew a bit self-conscious about the gem's maxxed rizz effect and how everyone kept eyeing the emerald a second too long for comfort, so she decided to hide away said rizz in a spot where none of her rivals could get to it. Oh and uh Cleopatra wrote up a dedication to Ra that's hella cryptic too.
One long rest later, the girls go to Cleopatra's pool on a donkey cart. Yes, a donkey cart. It was Omar's idea. Speaking of Omar, prepare yourself buddy because the girls have dubiously decided to give you some Lane Lore to chew on. O-oh you like it a lot. A lot a lot. Well okay cool, maybe you can help out, cool.
The girls manage to figure out the riddle in Cleopatra's dedication, find a little stone coffer that has the queen's treasure and-- SM JUMPSCARE
With a donkey as the girls' only escape method and Omar having suddenly disappeared, a scuffle ensues where the girls play hot potato with the box until SM gets their hands on it and opens it, and here we get a very accurate depiction of what SM and the girls found in the box once it was actually opened.
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Description: a hand made of salt shaped in an upside-down "ok" symbol, circa 1920s-30s.
The sheer whiplash of this leaves both sides of the conflict losing enough HP that they're all on red-- SM is blaming the girls for this (how dare >:[) and dip. Omar is gone, and all the girls get as compensation is the empty box and a letter from Aurora telling them that they'll know to read the hidden clues. The girls head back feeling very hollow and dead inside, and this is the one time one of the girls questions how the hell did SM know they were at Siwa. I mean they never get any answer to this (kinda), but it is a milestone! They're aware of it now!
Once they get back to Cairo, they ask around and find that Omar's completely up and vanished, and they decide they'll just head back to Moscow since their investigation has come to a dead end. On the way, Pam comments about the falafel she bought being hella salty, which leads Violet to an epiphany that hey, the Sahara isn't the only desert that exists, let alone the only desert known for how white it is (like how Boracay Beach is known for how white and fine its sand is, but it's not the only white sand beach that exists). A quick Google search (and a long flight (35 HOURS CAIRO TO SUCRE???)) leads them to the Salar de Uyuni in Bolivia.
Nicky reserves a room for them at Hotel Luna Salada (a real place you can book a stay at actually :D), and they make a friend by the name of Adriana, a local waitress in the hotel restaurant. Adriana helps them pick out a dessert, fills them in on some stuff about the Salar since the girls came here 100% out of impulse, and talks about possible itinerary locations to go to, like the Isla de Pescado, Tiwanaku (the "Gate of the Sun"), Lake Titiaca, and Laguna Colorada. Y'know, typical tourist stuff, and Adriana was so kind to show them pictures she took when she visited said places herself! :D
Anyway so while the girls long rest, Luke is mulling about in his base waiting for updates. Someone calls him about the whole Egypt thing, and Luke calls the girls incompetent? Rude, oh and something about the caller being Luke's "secret weapon". Cassidy calls him on a theory she has about the gemstone being in Cleopatra's palace, and since the girls are currently long-resting (which means they aren't doing anything), Luke figures that a little diving trip in Alexandria to search for the gem with Cassidy won't hurt. Besides, he still has his secret weapon.
Oh yeah and he knows the girls are long resting because he has a drone in Bolivia spying on them and showing him their every move. Touch grass, Luke. No, going on a diving trip in Alexandria doesn't count, there's barely any grass there /j
Morning comes in Bolivia, and the girls head out early to search the Salar as much as they can. They look around the flat white desert, eat some late breakfast, toy around with forced perspective camera shenanigans for a bit, and read up on some LANE LOOORREEEEE
So Aurora's been to Pumapunku and Tiwanaku which is cool, she paid a visit to the archaeological site probably and that's really cool. She says something about hiding the queen's treasure in a fish's stomach covered in very fine thorns. Sergei ends up having an epiphany, and that leads the girls to Isla de Pescado, which just so happens to be "Fish Island" in Spanish, and has cacti on it, it's all coming together :D
Oh and the fish drawing Aurora made is coords to the treasure seemingly so that's cool-- OMAR JUMPSCARE
The girls are very surprised to find Omar joining them, and Omar explains that he booked it when SM came over and lost his cellphone as a result. However, he managed to figure out that Aurora's riddle was about salt and not sand, and decided to head on over to Bolivia since he assumed that's where the girls are going. How did he find them? It was just out of pure coincidence, and also the fact that the girls are extremely recognizable. Hm.
Anyway, Paulina plugs the coordinates into her GPS and leads the girls plus Omar to a little cave at the bottom of a little embankment. The girls find that, lo and behold, there's an old tin box containing a bright green emerald!
Meanwhile Luke is not finding anything in Alexandria haha L, LVK L get dunked on Luke, Cassidy girlie that's not a man to simp for find someone else gurl-- oh dear Luke is alerted that the treasure has been found and now he's planning on heading over to Bolivia? Now how could he possibly know that?
In the meantime, I dunno what's up in the air or if it's the Archaeology major speaking in him but Omar's really invested in this treasure, even more so than the girls to the degree that the girls are a little freaked out by it-- RHEA JUMPSCARE-- Paulina calms the big bord down and gets it to not trample Omar please, he's still a friend of theirs. Colette picks up this blue notebook Omar seems to have dropped.
The girls plus Omar head back to the SUVs, and Omar is really trying to persuade the girls that he should bring it back to Cairo. The girls are not jazzed at the idea because Omar bringing it back alone will be too unsafe, y'know with Luke and Cassidy and SM and all. They gotta think about this rationally-- WHOA OKAY OMAR calm your man tits buddy why are you demanding they trust you like you automatically deserve your trust-- ohh that's how Klawitz has known about the girls' whereabouts, Omar was working as a double agent.
So yeah Omar snatches the box from Colette and drives off in his SUV, leaving the girls in the dust. The girls freak out and are feeling that EMOTIONAL DAMAGE, but Colette for some reason is very calm about Omar booking it with the emerald. And that's because SHE HAS IT :D she did a lil' switcheroo so now the emerald's with her while the box is with Omar.
For context about how Colette knew about this, remember the blue notebook Omar dropped? Yeah that notebook was a company LVK notebook, straight from Luke himself. Then after Colette saw it, everything about Omar became incredibly sus, so she performed this precautionary measure.
So now the girls talk to the local authorities about how the whole thing with the emerald is gonna go down, and soon the girls are waiting for a plane back to Moscow.
As for Omar, well, he goes over to Luke's super-fancy hotel in La Paz, Bolivia, and he hands the box to Luke, explicitly stating that he decided he'd let Luke open it before he himself can appreciate it.
Luke opens the box, and here we see an accurate depiction of what Luke sees.
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Description: an upside-down "ok" symbol drawn in strawberry pink lip balm, signed Colette [insert last name], circa 2018.
Luke punts the box (prolly with the lip balm still inside it) into the swimming pool, tells Omar to get out, and that's the end of that. Haha Omar L Luke L
The girls head back to Moscow to drop Sergei off when SURPRISE PARTY BY IRINA'S SQUAD :DDD
Then the girls are about to return to Whale Island to presumably Peter Griffin in their dorms, when Colette suggests they make a journal a la Aurora Beatrix Lane, and they do. In a pink notebook because it was Colette's idea so we might as well give her that
And they take a black-and-white group picture of them wearing adventurer clothes like Aurora would've done. The brainrot is real, these girls are mentally ill /j
And that's the book :D
... Honestly it's the most meh out of the trilogy besides the big-brain bits in the middle and the end imo
The writing was so much more stilted in this one, even for Scholastic standards, and everything feels pretty..... kid's book. Even more so than the usual in the book's English translations. I do readings for the books in some of my Discords, and this book did not read well at aaallll. And I haven't even mentioned the typos in the book (they're not a lot, but they exist, and they're kinda egregious :D) and some grammar errors if I'm remembering things correctly. It might just be a translation thing-- I worry a bit for the translator who had to put this together.
Luke's character here is also kinda wonk? For one we see him directly contradict his anti-friendship spiel in TS 1 since he literally greets Petrovski like a friend (maybe it's a "friendship doesn't exist except in 4Chan" thing, I dunno). Then in the middle of the book, he gets... very Disney villain-y. The most egregious example here is the chapter "Lurking in the Shadows", where as you can see
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I am confusion?? Luke has been described as a to-the-point brat who hardly cares for the means to his end (unless it will impact his ability to achieve the end) and is so fixated on his goal that he doesn't touch grass. Is this not-touching-grass behavior? Yeah, definitely, but this??? This is too Disney villain???? Why does the man break into an evil cackle in front of Cassidy???? I understood it in book 1 because man thinks he's doing a "You may think you have outsmarted me but I have OUTSMARTED YOUR OUTSMARTING", but this one?? Maybe it's my personal taste, but it's too cartoonish and too... deviated from what we know of him up to this point.
ALSO TWIRLING HIS MUSTACHE? WHAT MUSTACHE IS HE TWIRLING THAT THING IS NOT TWIRL-ABLE
Also time to address the one big plot hole in this book: Aurora's diary.
So in this book there's only one diary, which is infinitely simpler than the two we got in the first book. This diary supposedly contains Aurora's records of her mission in hiding Cleopatra's Rizzmerald, and the details are supposedly vague enough that Luke felt the need to kidnap and interrogate Irina, a Hannah Lane descendant, to fill in the blanks. However, when you look at the contents of the diary itself (which lord knows how many times Luke himself has looked through it), there's hardly any blanks that need to be filled, at least if you're Luke.
The diary itself is mostly in the background-- like I said, not as much Lane Lore here as the previous book, the girls mostly rely on Aurora's letters to Hannah here-- but there's one specific entry the girls read in the latter half of the book that explicitly mentions Pumapunku and Tiwanaku, and how Aurora is there for her mission to hide the emerald. Complete with coordinates hidden in a little drawing! My one question I have for Luke is, why didn't he go straight to Bolivia and started searching there? Why did he go through all the effort of kidnapping Irina, tailing the girls around Sahara el Beyda, letting SM fall for the salt replica gambit, left his base to touch grass and go on a dive with Cassidy in Egypt; all if he could've just gone straight to Bolivia to look for the treasure there? Sure, Aurora did a good job hiding the coordinates in the fish doodle, but someone as observant and as obsessed about the outcome instead of the journey like Luke would rather have sidestepped all the Aurora shenanigans and beelined straight to the goal if he was able to.
Luke hardly has an excuse here because he owned the diary at the start of the book, and most definitely read through it many times (and we know he's the type to do this, see TS 1). The plot hole is plot hole-ing, it seems :/
Maybe it was just an excuse for the girls to get a giant glowing arrow pointing in the direction of the treasure? It certainly feels like it.
Anyway, the things that carry this book and made it memorable when I first read it (and allowed me to ignore the iffy bits) are the gottems and Omar as a character. Aurora setting up a salt replica of the Rizzmerald as a gottem in a time capsule, only to be opened almost a hundred years later to still be as potent as intended when it was made so long ago? That is amazing, like c'mon, pure comedy material.
Even funnier is Colette doing the exact same thing, only with her lip balm. Luke is quaking in his bougie-ass leather boots.
Now for Omar. This may be a hot take of mine here, but Omar's sus-ness is actually at a decent level compared to the girls and what they usually deal with. On one hand, Omar is incredibly suspicious with how incredibly lucky the girls are to find an Archaeology Oxford major working as a Sahara el Beyda tour guide; but on the other hand, the girls had almost the exact same situation with Diego in Mexico (I didn't mention him in the first review, but he came in clutch in TS 1).
The girls met Diego in Merida, Mexico, and he helped them with their research into "the invisible place", which happened to be Uxmal, along the Puuc Route. Diego also just so happened to be a tour-guide-in-training for the Puuc Route, which was the place the girls just so happened to need to go to find Aurora's second journal.
In comparison, the girls meet Omar in Khan El-Khalili while they were looking for supplies for their trip to the Siwa Oasis. It comes up in conversation that the girls are headed to Siwa, and Omar just so happened to be a tour guide for Sahara el Beyda, which was where the Siwa Oasis is, and it just so happened to be where the girls needed to go. When you stack them up together, it made perfect sense that the girls thought they could trust him-- Diego didn't know much about their trip and helped them the best he could (which was a lot), so why wouldn't Omar do the same? He's an Oxford Archaeology major, too, for crying out loud, the girls struck gold in the end!
Gold that was too shiny and too good to be true. Gold that was, in the end, nothing more than pyrite, fool's gold.
Omar is a good case for why you should be careful with who you trust, and when you should start thinking a little bit when you're getting a little too lucky with the people you meet. When the girls got to know him a little more and decided to trust him and tell him the deal with their trip, he got way invested in the gem-- too invested to not be a little bit suspicious. Maybe the girls mistook it for his passion for his archaeology major, maybe they mistook it for something else-- but whatever the case, Omar pulled the cheesecloth over the girls' eyes and really only fell apart near the end, when his alibis and behavior started becoming more and more suspicious; and by then, Omar didn't need to be as inconspicuous, and the girls had gotten to know him too much to readily say to him "okay buddy can you kindly f%ck off, your vibes are not vibing here".
The girls probably should've been suspicious when Omar reappeared in Bolivia out of nowhere, but I guess his alibi was just good enough (and the girls at this point were probably running on adrenaline, caffeine and a brain on 70% capacity at most) to pass the Deception check.
Fr tho there were some bits where the girls should've found him sus but they didn't (him accidentally saying "I did it" when they uncovered the emerald, and also him handling the emerald the way he did), so shrugs. It could be a translation thing, but it could also be something else.
Anyway, kinda meh for a sequel, but it does have its standouts that allow it to somewhat stand on the same level as the first and third books. Kinda.
Hey, at least it's not as bad as Crystal Fairies-- that's the bar of bad-ness I'm setting. It's not as bad as Crystal Fairies and that's what matters--
Also special thanks to @ishmeowwow (it won't let me ping you for some reason bestie <:[) for making the lil' artworks haha
#geronimo stilton#thea sisters#thea stilton#book review#book rambles#book rant#thank you ishmeow for making the gottems for me :D#you came in clutch while my ipad is still dieded thank you bestie <3#in the book it's just the lip balm but ishmeow decided to go all-out with the gottem gag and i can't be more grateful lmao#same goes with the gemstone in aurora's gottem (it's just the fake tiara plus fake gem) but hey the more salt the merrier :D#book 2 luke is so jarringly different from his other depictions but at the same time#he does not in fact touch grass and he does crack an evil cackle at least once a book so#i dunno how i feel about it . .#on one hand it adds to him not touching grass#but on the other hand it doesn't connect with his “this villain is supposed to make you shnit your pants at how intimidating he is”#he's intimidating because of his connections his ability to basically spy on the entire world and control everything from his base#and y'know he can tell his goons to do whatever and they'll literally wreak havoc to fulfill said requests#he was so intimidating in concept that they had to nerf him with incompetent goons lmao#after doing last minute research i am deeply concerned for the girls' wallets and their mental and physical health :D#like good god i thought a ten hour flight was unbearable and made your body stiff but holy damn#i'm not complaining too much about the timeline tho because this is hilarious and makes the girls look so neurodivergent#“what do you mean we flew a total of 64 hours by plane feels like it's only been a day to m--”#*dies*
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shoukohime · 6 months
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i did the uquiz too and I got utahime lol
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todayisafridaynight · 6 months
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until yoko tells me otherwise ill choose to believe sawashiro stayed in america with aoki so i can drive myself insane thinking of all the things that could entail
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caffeine-high · 11 months
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you ever have your dm send you something out of session and be like: fear.png
anyway, she's evil incarnate and all she has to say for herself is this
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ghoul-haunted · 1 year
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ngl crassus' father and brothers dying, leaving him the last man standing. and then crassus and publius dying, leaving marcus licinius crassus jr the last man standing. like father, like son. it has me feeling some kind of way.
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moonstruckme · 7 months
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Omg Mae more Spence please!! I love him ❤️❤️ what about the team is out at the bar after a case and some guy is flirting with reader and not taking no for an answer and spencer steps in even tho it’s out of character for him bc he’s so so jealous
Thanks for requesting :)
cw: minor assault, fictional confirmation that most guys are douchebags
Spencer Reid x bau!reader ♡ 926 words
“Right,” JJ says, “so Henry had actually been trying to say ‘fork,’ but of course everyone heard ‘fuck.’” 
You double over, laughter bubbling to the surface even easier than usual with the help of the couple of drinks you’ve had. Garcia has far surpassed you, tears leaking from her eyes as Morgan all but holds her upright. 
“And Will’s mom was…” JJ shakes her head with a smile, taking a sip of her drink. “Well, she was pretty upset. She accused Will of using that language around Henry, because she said he’s always had a potty mouth.” 
“Will?” Garcia cackles. “Our sweet southern beaux? There’s no way.” 
“I don’t know,” Emily muses. “I can see it. But he wouldn’t do it around Henry, for sure.” 
“Actually,” Spencer pipes up, “studies show that many children pick up swear words regardless of their parents’ usage. Even if they don’t know what they mean, most have a vocabulary of thirty to forty offensive words by the time they start school.”
The humor drains from JJ’s face. “Like, kindergarten?”
“Sometimes earlier,” Spencer says, before seeming to realize JJ finds these facts more alarming than fascinating. “I’m sure Henry will have a higher vocabulary than that by the time he gets to that age, though.” he adds hastily. “Probably won’t even need to resort to swear words.” You grin at him, laying your head on his shoulder consolingly. You might not have done it if you were completely sober, but right now it feels like the most natural thing in the world, and Spencer only tenses for a second before relaxing.
It’s Garcia who notices first, stiffening and straightening in her seat, but Hotch is the one to ask, “Can we help you?”
“I think so,” drawls a voice from behind you. “You can give me your friend’s number.”
You turn, finding yourself too close to the man standing with his hand presumptuously on the back of your chair and grinning like your agreement is a done deal. 
“Thanks,” you say, not unkindly, “but I’m not looking for anything.” 
The man tilts his head as if to say come on. “But don’t you just love when you find it anyways?”
“I’m here with my friends.” 
“And I’m not asking you to leave them.” He moves his hand to your shoulder, undeterred when you lean away. “Just give me your number, and next time you can be here with me.” 
“She said she’s not interested.” Emily’s voice is hard. If this guy weren’t so unpleasant, you’d be impressed that he’s still here, with your whole team staring daggers at him. 
The douchebag only smiles. “She didn’t say that, though. Did you, sweetheart?”
Your blood runs hot at his disregard of Emily. A man like this, you know—the assertive, overly masculine type—can be dangerous to piss off. But so can you. “I’m not," you say, finally letting the disgust you’ve been holding back seep into your voice. “Leave us alone.” 
Anger sparks in the man’s eyes, just like you knew it would. You don’t expect your gaze looks much different. His grip on your shoulder tightens as he gets in your face, close enough for you to smell the alcohol on his breath. “I know you don’t mean that.” 
You tense, ready to shake him off you and drag him back to whatever musty corner of the bar he’d come from, but Spencer beats you to it. 
“Okay, that’s enough,” he says, prying the fingers from your shoulder. You stand, a protective instinct moving you in front of Spencer, but he pushes past you, badge outheld. “FBI. Do you really wanna pursue this? Because if so, I’ll have no problem cuffing you and explaining it to the local police.” 
The guy makes like he’s going to dart for you again, but Spencer steps in his way, pushing him back with a hand on his shoulder. His voice is quiet but clear. “Do not touch her.”
“Fuck off,” the guy shakes Spencer’s hand off, stalking away. He’s drunker than you thought, wobbling his way back to the bar. 
“Spence,” you say, taking his hand as though mere contact with the man’s shoulder could hurt it. “You didn’t have to do that, I could have handled it.” 
“You shouldn’t have to,” he replies, pulling back the collar of your shirt distractedly. His fingers skim over tender skin, and you look down to find your shoulder is red where the man had gripped it. It’ll probably be a bruise tomorrow. Spencer’s eyes darken. “I can still arrest him. That’s assault.”
“It’s fine.” You move your shirt back into place, pulling him back to your seats. “I’m fine, really. Sorry about the scene, guys.” 
“You’ve got nothing to apologize for,” Hotch says severely, still eyeing the man from across the room. 
Morgan lets out a low whistle, relaxing back into his seat. “Way to go, wonder boy. Got a little jealous there, did we?”
Spencer lets out a little laugh, though it sounds more strained than usual. “I just did what all of us wanted to do.” 
“Agreed,” Emily says gruffly, toasting with her beer. “I thought I was going to have to go all the way around the table to kick that guy’s ass.” 
You laugh. “I appreciate the support, but I can take care of myself, you know.” You adjust your collar self-consciously, and as soon as you drop your hand back to your lap, Spencer’s taking it in his under the table. 
“Yeah,” he says casually, thumb stroking soothingly at your wrist. “We know.”
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soobnny · 10 months
Text
classmate au | yang jungwon
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❝ i’ve retired from the student council lmao ❞
heeseung | jay | jake | sunghoon | sunoo | JUNGWON | ni-ki
yang jungwon
where do i even begin
in the first year of highschool, he used to be THE class president
resident teacher’s pet, sits in the front, yada yada… typical good student stereotype
BUT NOW??? 😭😭😭😭
he just goes to school to be silly
don’t get me wrong like he is smart n still receives good grades
but he isn’t the 100% school jungwon from 7th grade
MOVING ON
how do you befriend yang jungwon
he’s actually a friend of a friend!
apparently, rei had met him when she was in the student council for like a year
so naturally, you eat lunch together at the canteen
he always has those cool lunchboxes and just rly GOOD food for lunch that he doesn’t share
you didn’t know what to expect from the boy when you first started eating lunch together
maybe timid??? shy??? bossy?? you don’t know bc he’s in a different section
you certainly don’t expect him to know about every single possible GOSSIP in the school
he says it in such a funny way too like
yang jungwon storytelling skills 10/10
and he laughs so hard like he will draw attention to your table bc he’s laughing so hard
but it’s valid bc the things he says sometimes are so unhinged that even YOU can’t help the loud cackles
tho you don’t rly become close friends until sports fest season
you hang around each other ++ additional friends BUT they’re always in some contest so you’re left with jungwon most of the time
“do you want to leave and go to the mall??,” you’d ask more as a joke
but he agrees
YANG JUNGWON agrees to skip sports fest to go to the mall with you im in tears
that’s how you find yourselves in a small karaoke room at the mall
he drags you to the arcade too
the original bet was loser pays for the winner’s lunch
but then u lost every game and u looked so cute pouting that jungwon suddenly changes the rules
“FINE… winner pays for the loser’s lunch”
he pretends to be so upset about it too so that you can grab his arm and shake it around to try and get his attention
he gives in obv
then he takes u to lunch at one of like ur fav places and ure like omg ??? u think it’s telepathy that he knows
BUT NO he listens to your stories during lunch time and you’ve mentioned eating here and loving it before
he even has your order down but he tries not to be too obvious about it ☹️☹️
yang jungwon listens to you even tho you’re seated a few people away from him
womp womp it rains when u decide to go back to school
you two end up running in the rain together
WELL technically at first you tried to share his umbrella but then the both of you got too flustered
so when u started to stray away from his umbrella .. he CLOSES it
he takes your hand and goes running for the school so you can take shelter from the rain
the teachers and students look at u like 🤨🤨
anyways jungwon and (name) ABSENT from sports fest
the only thing you remember the event by is bc u joined picture taking before leaving the school grounds
it’s so natural hanging out with him
nothing ever feels forced bc he’s just so goofy and silly that you never feel crazy when talking to him
ever since then !!!!! he’d sit closer to you during lunch time
then he’d start waiting for you outside your classroom just to tell you something ??
will find every excuse to talk to you
and if the teacher needs something from your room? bye he’s VOLUNTEERING just to see you for a few seconds
ofc the teachers just think typical Jungwon behavior
but no … this is typical Jungwon with a Crush behavior
ALSO picture this
his classes end earlier than yours
he will literally pass by your classroom a million times and peek through the open door to make like brief eye contact with you
sometimes .. u don’t notice him and he just admires the way you look on forward to the teacher
also pretends his class ended late so when ur class dismisses he’ll be like “oh let’s talk to the cafeteria together!”
he’s not slick abt it
WHAT DID THAT MALL TRIP DO TO HIM
why is he suddenly so down bad and willing to do everything to hear you laugh
(he starts sharing his food with you btw i know… very shocking for him who ltrly Never shares)
he finally confesses after a school event that ran longer than it should’ve
so he sprints at you and tells you he needs to tell you something bc he is going crazy
CONFESSES !!!!!!!!!
ofc who are you to reject him.
be careful when you start dating bc i firmly believe he LOVES kissing 😹
like he is obsessed and will just be kissing you all the time i’m sorry i’m pushing this agenda
tho ofc in hidden areas!!!!!!!
he doesn’t want his beloved teachers catching him who still has an image of being a teacher’s pet
soooooo like……
“come here, let me kiss you”
you even receive TEXTS as if you’re some sort of sneaky link (you’re not)
“please meet me under the stairs beside the student council office and prepare your lips 😘😘😘😘”
under the stairs, the side of the basketball court, an empty classroom … everywhere
BEHAVE yang jungwon
he’s so clingy and so smug too
has you as his lockscreen
it’s so funny bc someone would borrow his phone and your zoomed in face would just flash in his phone
talks about u to his friends all the time
“isn’t my girlfriend so pretty?,” with this smile 😊😊😊😁
lets you wear his school blazer
sometimes he even switches ur pe shirts
HE DOESNT TELL U
He just likes seeing the big fat “yang” printed on your back
STUDY DATES
he makes his kisses a reward sometimes like if you get this question right he’ll SMOOCH u
he’s honestly so good at being academic support like he knows exactly what to say bc 7th grade him was a different breed n be was so eager to please and always felt so pressured
jungwon a Veteran u guys
helps you in the subjects you’re not so good in
tbh teaches better than your teachers sometimes
like he’d stay behind in class and it’s only the two of you in the classroom and he’ll start WRITING on the whiteboard
just starts lecturing to help you for an upcoming exam
ANYWAYS
honestly just good luck to you and your poor lips
oh also your poor stomach bc he will always make you laugh
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note. credits to user @.luvknow for the layout of this post! let me know what you think! please discuss these with me i’m crazy
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saetoru · 1 year
Text
✩ ‧₊˚ ✩。APOLOGIES — SHIDOU RYUSEI.
✩ — contents ⋮ fluff, gn! reader, established relationship, post argument make-up, annoying shidou as always, reposting bc it got marked w a label the first time even tho it’s sfw
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dating shidou is not easy, it takes maturity and patience and the will of god’s strongest soldier. in fact, most of the time, dating shidou means you’re constantly drifting in and out of being mad at him—which, right now, you’re quite mad.
“shidou ryusei, it is one am,” you glare, opening your door and rubbing the sleep out of your eyes. he has a wolfish grin on his face—it’s cocky, and it widens as he stares you up and down in your little batman pajama pants. normally, you wouldn’t answer the door for someone you’re mad at, boyfriend or not, but shidou makes it hard to ignore with his incessant knocking.
you value your sleep—and more importantly, you value not being kicked from your apartment for noise complaints.
“aw, not the full government name,” he says slyly, and it only makes your blood pressure rise even more as you practically feel a vein pop.
“ryusei,” you warn. but he doesn’t pay attention, just as you expect. instead, he whistles lowly.
“i like the uniform. ‘s cute,” he cackles, eyeing the way your pants are hung a little lower on your hips from tossing around in bed, exposing a bit of skin that he drinks in shamelessly.
“thanks,” you say dryly, “they’re fuzzy and they were half off. now why are you here?”
“just visiting,” he shrugs.
“at one am?”
“it’s twelve fifty-two,” he corrects like he lives to defy you in every corner. and you bet he loves it—in fact, you know he’s positively enthused by the way your lips curl into a scowl and your eyes glare at him so fiercely. he stares down at the way your hips slant as your cross your arms, and he chuckles (which you think is almost passable as a giggle at the sheer giddiness.)
only shidou ryusei would be giddy from turning you halfway near homicidal, and only he would find the murderous glint in your eyes cute, wholesome.
“what do you want,” you say bluntly. he takes a step forward, and no matter how mad you are, you can’t help but stand painfully still as he leans closer, trying your damn hardest not to lean in when his hot breath fans over your face as he stares at you.
“your bed would be nice,” he hums, “preferably with you in it.”
he’s insufferable. everything he does and says makes you want to chuck bricks at his head and hope it fixes the loose wires he seems to have. but you don’t even get to finish saying, “fuck off, ryu—” before he cuts in.
“c’mon, don’t make me find a way in myself,” he curls his lips wickedly, like he’s got you in checkmate, like the cards have been in his favor all along as you play the game he’s written. but this time is different—this time, you’re determined not to let shidou take advantage of your weak heart through his rough and tough charms.
this time, you have a point to prove.
“i’m going to call the cops on you,” you threaten, “tell them i’m being harassed by a pink-haired freak.”
“i wouldn’t mind getting married in jail,” he grins, and you can practically make out the hearts in his eyes as he looks at you. it makes you want to slam the door in his face and go right back to bed. but that would only mean he’d go back to pounding on your door and singing your name, and you’re pretty sure you’re one more instance away from your neighbors collectively petitioning your eviction.
“i don’t want to marry you,” you hiss.
“don’t be like that,” he reaches to poke your cheek, “being inmates would be fun. we could give the officers a show as we fuck—”
“ryusei,” you hiss.
arguing with shidou always ends like this. he worms his way in and knocks down your walls without ever saying i’m sorry. he eases his way back into your heart with wide grins and cheeky comments and that charm of his that really shouldn’t be as endearing as it is. he never admits he’s wrong—but the way he tries harder the next time, makes sure he does it right, makes sure he’s better just for you, you know he cares. he never resolves things in the way you would consider the standard method of patching up after those unavoidable couple fights—but this time you decide it’s different. 
this time your feelings are hurt—really hurt. the kind of hurt that makes you wonder if you’re annoying. or if you talk a lot. or if he even wants to be around you. or that maybe you tire him out. or that the sound of your voice is grating. or that you overstep boundaries. 
this time there is no brushing the cracked shards of your heart under the rug and acting like he can kiss the pieces back together. this time you want to hear it from him—and if you have to stand at your door at ungodly hours of the morning and milk it out of him…well, you’re inclined to do that. 
“c’mon, babe. are you gonna keep me out here all night? lemme in—”
“you’re not coming in until you apologize,” you say bluntly. he groans, throws his head back, and slaps his hands over his face as he grumbles into his palms. 
“god, you’re killin’ me here. seriously, you know i didn’t mean it—”
“‘for fuck’s sake, i’m not your damn kid’,” you mock his voice from the other night, reminding him of his own words like he’s forgotten. he only stares at you with pursed lips and a blank face, but that doesn’t stop you, however, as you scowl at him and continue, “i don’t know. you seemed to really mean it when you said that.”
“i was just tired, you know that—”
“i was just trying to look out for you,” you don’t even seem like you’re listening to him anymore, poking a finger at his chest accusingly as he lets you, “i watch you sleep at unreasonable hours only to wake up before the sun itself—”
“yeah, and i told you i’d work on that—”
“and then i ask you, have you eaten today? and you know what you tell me? yeah, i had a protein shake this morning—”
“okay, and that was like one time—”
“and then i hear that you get into a fight, and lo and behold, you show up to my place with a bloody nose and cracked knuckles—”
“but you should’ve seen the other guy—”
“and then i come over to your apartment, and your laundry isn’t done, your dishes aren’t washed, and you have eighty million socks on the floor,” you start to put a finger up for everything you list, making him fiercely fight back a chuckle that he knows would seal his death wish, “and all i try to do is take care of you so that you can be healthy and play your best and what do you do? yell at me and tell me it’s not my responsibility to—”
you’re cut off by lips pressing onto yours harshly, the rough feeling of a calloused hand cupping your cheeks and bringing you closer. and maybe if you had a bit more self-respect, you would shove away the rude, ungrateful, irritating, tacky-haired douchebag of a boyfriend that stands in front of you, but you simply choose to lose all dignity when it counts most. you choose to give in, melt into his touch, lean closer and fist his shirt as your lips press back just as firm. 
and when he gently pushes you back, you let him. you even let him step into your apartment and spin you around, shutting the door and pressing your back against the cool surface. his body cages you so that there’s no room for escape—not that you think you could even run from him now that he’s let himself in, anyway. but with one more peck to your lips, he pulls away, pressing his forehead against yours as he clicks his teeth and sighs. 
“fine, i’m fuckin’ sorry. ‘s that what you wanted to hear?”
“not if you’re only saying it to make me un-mad,” you say stubbornly.
he clicks his teeth again, shoots you a look of irritation that you return tenfold. “‘m sayin’ it ‘cus i want to, dumbass. you think i’d say that shit just to say it?”
“i don’t know, you’re rude,” you shrug, not meeting his eyes. he rolls his eyes before he leans in and kisses your cheek, then the other, then the tip of your nose, then just over your brow, then your eyelid—and when he sees the beginnings of a smile crack on your lips, he nibbles on your cheek and pulls a soft giggle from you against your will. 
“said i was fuckin’ sorry, stop being stubborn.”
“don’t yell at me again,” you huff, “and fix your sleep schedule.”
“okay.”
“and eat proper meals.”
“fine.”
“and maybe clean up.”
“kay, i’ll try. happy?”
“and stop getting into fights—”
“let’s set realistic expectations, here,” he cuts you off, earning a huff from you. but you seem significantly less angry—and he’s glad. because sleeping without your body to squeeze in the dead of night and not hearing you hum that stupid song you always listen to as you wash dishes and not getting those back to back pings on his phone as you spam him with daily updates is starting to get to him. so he wraps an arm around your waist, tugs you flush against his chest as meets your gaze, “are you still mad? because then you’re just being difficult.”
“no,” you sigh, making him grin.
“good.”
“i just love you,” you mumble, and there’s that cute, innocent little pout that you always do tugging at your lips, the one that drives him mad and reminds him he’s just as in love too. “i want what’s best for you—”
“yeah, yeah,” he grunts, “okay. i love you too. i’ll start being more responsible and shit. now can i come to bed?”
“fine,” you cave, “but—”
“great, let’s go,” he drags you along, not wasting a moment before your body is tossed onto the mattress and his lands on top of you, head tucking into your neck. and it’s warm—where his lips are, where he traces kisses along the awaiting skin. 
dating shidou ryusei is exhausting—but there are a few perks, you have to admit. 
“you’re a headache,” you murmur, threading your fingers through his hair. he snorts, shakes his head from his place in your neck, earning a small giggle from you at the way it tickles. 
“yeah? so are you with your nagging.”
“i don’t nag,” you slap his shoulder. he laughs—it’s that low, soft rumble that he only laughs around you, when his head is tucked into your neck, and your hands rub up and down his back, and he’s content. 
and maybe a little in love. 
“you do. but i love it, it’s hot when you’re mad.”
“go to sleep, ryusei,” you roll your eyes. and then you wait a moment or two—just so he doesn’t get a big head when you begrudgingly mumble, “and i love you too.”
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half of this is just filler with dialogue but wtv. take this lil scenario in my head of arguing w shidou bc he’s a living train wreck
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thepersonnamedsam · 5 months
Note
heyy🤍
I was wondering if u could kindly write a little something about period cuddles and comfort with lando, thank you in advanceee
pairing: lando norris x fem!reader
summary: headcanons about period cuddles with lando
warnings: period pains, blood
note: i am so sorry it took me sooooo long to write your request!!! pls accept my apology, please!!!!
masterlist / taglist
it had started again, your period
what it meant for you was; pain, pain and more pain, it was unbearable
800mg of ibuprofen every 6 hours, warmth and curled up either in bed or on the couch was usually the solution for the week
when lando wasn’t around
if lando was there (which usually wasn’t the case), you cuddled - always
„baby, please let me help you, i can’t stand to see you in pain“
you smiled through your pain and just told him to go and buy your favourite snack
he called carlos - he for sure has some womanly advice for the youngster
c: „why did you not cuddle with her, cabrón?“
l: „she didn’t offer it, i didn’t want to overstep“
as he returned home with more than half the store, he slowly approached you
„baby? are you sleeping? do you want cuddles?“
you whined and nodded your head
„c‘mere baby“
his arms snaked around your abdomen, his warm hands rested on your lower belly, massaging lightly, trying to ease your pain
„does it feel good? am i doing something wrong?“
you told him he did everything right, which he let out a sigh
his body warmth made you feel sleepy
„just go to sleep, baby, i’ll be here when you wake up, promise“
his steady breath and light massaging let you fall asleep easily
your breath slowed and your eyes closed, lando knew you were finally asleep
he didn’t want to get up, but your hot water bottle had started to get cold
so he got up as slowly and as silently as he good, without waking you up
the hot water bottle was taken out of your grip and lando started to boil water in the kettle
he also tried to make you some sort of dessert, but he failed miserably
he put the now freshly hot water bottle in your grip again and turned on the tv
when you woke up, your favourite series was paused on the screen and lando was just scrolling through instagram
„good morning baby, how was your sleep, you in any pain?“
you nodded and he handed you a cold glass of water and the next batch of ibuprofen
„has it been 6 hours already“, you has asked him
„yeah, i got this period app where it lets you document your medication. now i always know when your next periods gonna be“
you were surprised about his engagement
actually you weren’t, he’s your boyfriend and a bloody good one at that
but it’s still lando
„press play already!“, you demanded
„alright“, he laughed and pressed play on the remote
he lightly started to caress your neck with soft kisses
a kiss there
a kiss here
it felt so good
„please don’t stop baby“
„never.“
you could never survive another period without lando
even if that meant travelling to grand prixs with him and sharing his time with racing
but it didn’t matter, because he was still as affectionate as ever and never stopped comforting you through your pain
even when you started crying over charles dsq in texas
he brought you to the ferrari garage to comfort charles - more for your comfort, but it didn’t matter
charles had to promise you, that he was fine and that he’s not gonna quit and accidentally end up on a ranch as a cowboy
lando thanked charles multiple times that day
or when you saw a little kid tumble and fall to the ground - you instantly started crying with the kid
lando hugged you and promised to help the little kid (even tho he was cackling up inside)
or when he had to get roscoe from lewis, because you needed cuddles but the race was about to start
you watched the race from his drivers room and cried when he drove into the points
you could get very emotional
but lando loved that about you
let’s be honest, that man loved everything about you
he still wasn’t sure how you were his girlfriend (lando norrizz)
but you loved him very much
°°°
@ironmaiden1313 , @topguncultleader , @biglittlesecret, @gulabjamooon , @lovelyy-moonlight , @peachyplumsss , @mistrose23 , @copper-boom , @love4lando , @champomiel , @serenityleah , @iloveyou3000morgan , @angelwithoutmywings , @elleeeee21 , @youkissedareaderinthedark , @mikauraur , @thybulleric , @lpab , @fdl305 , @mellowarcadefun , @teti-menchon0604 , @vildetry06 , @bibissparkles , @aurora-maria , @lunnnix , @sya-skies , @Buckywifeyy , @dakotali , @rechtrecht , @noncannonships , @1eclerc16 , @pitlanebabe , @sopheeg , @avengersheart , @thatsadsmallchild , @peachiicherries , @idkiwantchocolatee , @callsign-scully , @mehrmonga , @badbatch-simp24 , @lissyontour , @din0nugs , @elliegrey2803 , @gay-for-victoria-de-angelis , @10vely-yutazen , @daggersquadphantom , @azriel-the-shadowsinger , @i-love-scott-mccall , @darleneslane , @mikauraur , @heartmetaphor , @darleneslane , @ellswilliams , @thxtmarvelchick , @nataliambc , @dontjudgeabookbythecover , @hockeyboysarehot , @thehistoryone
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nouvellevqgue · 4 months
Text
✦ PICTURE ME NAKED
📷: lewis hamilton x reader
💭: everybody loves him and his talent. and of course, the fans love his talent in capturing his girlfriend's moments every time.
‼️: her face claim is taylor russell, age gaps (reader is 27), lovesick lewis, supportive fan, no bad fan behavior here bcs we only want some peace, some curse words.
💌: happy holiday and (late) christmas for those who celebrate!! while i finish my oscar and lando fics, let me treat you with lewis one. hope you enjoy it!💗
₊˚⊹౨ৎ ⋆。✦˚‎
TWITTER
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ynupdates
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ynupdates Y/n L/n for The Face
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username oh motherrr
username she's literally jenna ortega but older version
username i knew why lewis is so head over heels for her now
⤷ username i mean look at herrrrrr
username hey siri can i marry a picture?
username lewis liking this... so that means he followed her fan accounts to see updates or he's just lovesick as fuck?
⤷ username probably just lovesick
username giving mick when laila's fan account's are posting something
username aside from their age gaps, but whatever tho i still like them both bcs i cannot think of any gorgeous couple aside from them rn
username how many years apart are they now?
⤷ username fucking twenty years😎
username she is literally so gorgeous, i'm gonna watch bones and all now
username timothée chalamet and lewis hamilton are those lucky guys who can be with her and she's looking so happy with them
⤷ username she's been with multiple men, but they're the person who can makes her happy
yourusername
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liked by lewishamilton, tchalamet, and 238,100 others
yourusername 😵‍💫
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georgerussell63 🤣🤣🤣i love the way you captured him like that
lewishamilton Why are you even posting this🤦🏽‍♂️
username THE WAY SHE CHOSE VIOLENCE AJSJAJAJSJ
username but he looks so good in every angles ugh i'm jealooouusssss
username he looks so done
username WHAT IS HE LISTENING???
username lewis taking her pictures: 🥰😍😚💗 meanwhile y/n on the other hand: 💀🤔🤨🫢
username but he looks so good too thooo
username the contrast difference between them both making me cackling so loooud
username me when mercedes lost:
⤷ yourusername Same
⤷ username SHE REPLIED TO MY COMMENT Y'ALL‼️‼️🔥‼️🗣️🗣️🗣️
username good at taking pictures bf + just snap whatever comes gf
mercedesamgf1 🫢🫢🫢
username we got his crumbs but at what cost
username i never expected this would come outta her account but what am i even expecting
username george what are you saying to him
⤷ georgerussell63 I swear I'm not saying anything
username but i love this still 🤣
yourusername
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yourusername i miss this so much
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lewishamilton no tag?
lewishamilton 🧍🏽‍♂️
⤷ username just calm dooown we're always knew that it was you all along because who could everrr
username i love this type of love language
username when will i ever got a bf like him
username american actress gf 🤝 british driver bf
⤷ mercedesamgf1 what a good combination, right?😉
username this is going to be my roman empire
username yourusername hire him as your photographer
⤷ yourusername Probably one day I will 🫡
⤷ georgerussell63 I agree though don't mind me
lewishamilton added to their story!
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caption: Morning rambles dj-ing mate✌🏽
yourusername added to their story!
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caption: Don't doubt me, I'm a DECENT photographer now😎
TWITTER
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lewishamilton My version of this thing.
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yourusername Oh this is quite low though
⤷ lewishamilton When you got low, I go low-er
⤷ username look what mercedes admin do to a man
⤷ mercedesamgf1 Swear we don't do anything
username not only her skin that's glowing, HER HAIR TOO✨✨
username wondering how did lewis took this since that he's not an actor
username he is so unserious😭😭
username but her face looks more relaxed tho can't lie
username the lightning being so bright just reminds me that he probably taking this sneakily
⤷ yourusername Honestly I know🤷🏽‍♀️
TWITTER
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yourusername WHAAAT??? THAT'S CRAZY!
👤: yourbestfriend
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username plane on a parking lot is my dream
⤷ yourbestfriend i've never thought about that either though🤷🏼‍♀️ it's just so random and spontaneous
username and why is he taking this?
⤷ username i think this was the second pic after the one from the twitter but idk don't come at me
charles_leclerc But really how could you move your plane to a parking lot?
⤷ yourusername By power.
username the plane looks so real tho
⤷ username because it is
username sometimes i wonder is her hair short or long
⤷ username we'll never know about that, next question.
lewishamilton added to their story!
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caption: Recharging🔋🍔
yourusername
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yourusername #ad #MyCalvin
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username i love when she gave no fuck and just put two hashtags and proceed to go
username calvin klein: mmm i just love the taste of nothing
username by the filter i know it's taken by one and only mr hamilton himself with his disposable camera
⤷ username how did u kno?
⤷ username most of her pictures is taken with that camera
calvinklein 🤩
lewishamilton
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lewishamilton Stylish baby
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rosalia.vt muy bonitaaaaaaaaaaaaa❤️‍🔥💕
⤷ username ROSALÍA'S HEREEE
⤷ username we all know because she is def motomami cause he is a broom broom papi
⤷ username the heck u talking about
username literally mother
username that shirt thoo🔥🔥
username now i know why is she paired with him...
yourusername
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yourusername My favorite colorrrr<33
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caption: Stroll around NYC💋💋
Y/N'S DIRECT MESSAGE
lewishamilton replied to your story!
lewishamilton: Since when did you even landed in New York?
yourusername: Yesterday
Oh wait, last night. I forgot🫢
lewishamilton: WITHOUT ME??
yourusername: I've noticed that you've been busy, so I don't want to bother you futher.
lewishamilton: Not anymore now
yourusername: So come here thennn
lewishamilton: Okay
Love you
yourusername: I LOVE YOU TOOOOO
lewishamilton added to their story!
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caption: Nothing's better than wine picking with you🍷
₊˚⊹౨ৎ ⋆。✦˚‎
—TAGLIST! @dinosushilun1 @miarabanana @4mula-1 @meowtastick @cabbyhabs @avengers-assemble123456 @4limq @queenofmanydreams
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bbonnenuit · 4 months
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The Smiths.
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notes: chrollo is yandere, although the fic is lighthearted. the biggest warning is the fact that chrollo looks like he'd listen to the smiths /j, another bigger warning is that reader is an avid the smiths hater. im not tho, all for fun. female reader.
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 “Daydreaming again, I see?”
   It would be a lie to say that Chrollo’s voice isn’t at the slightest bit pleasant to hear. It’s soft and smooth, but accompanied with a confident low timbre that you think might be the source of it’s charm. 
   You often wish you both don’t share a language to speak over, so whatever he speaks would be foreign yet pleasant gibberish in your ears. And maybe you’d be able to close your eyes and sleep. You’d be able to treat him as the background noise of some radio host talking about something as mundane as today’s newest dramas. 
  You don’t find the need to chase the impossible ideal this time. One doesn’t need to be a linguist expert in order to know no malice or warning is present in his voice, though one might need a bachelor’s degree and over four decades of experience in psychology to know he truly means nothing behind his calm demeanor. 
   You sign yourself to a fate you’re unsure of, and though it’s foolish, there’s nothing you can do anyway. You’re stuck with him, in a moving four-wheeled compartment, that’s also stuck in traffic. 
   “The music’s good.” Is all you say, and he hums in understanding. 
     Silence falls over the two of you again.
   You almost brought back the colorful reverie you were in before he decided to interject, until he reached for his phone to change the music. Oh, bluetooth, the convenient technology you are. His phone is located on the right of his steering wheel, far away from your reach. If he had reached for the audio system you would’ve been (maybe) able to slap his hand away. 
   “Hm, I’d rather you pay attention to me.” The lilt in his voice is unmistakable. And you almost gag, was that an attempt in flirting? Blegh.  
   “I’ll just stare at the cars,” Headlights and astigmatism can make a good duo, you remind yourself. 
   Chrollo hums again, You can almost laugh, so being stuck in your own daydreams and practically doing nothing is unacceptable, but staring at cars is alright? 
  You stare at a car, observing the way the light that emits from it’s headlights become blurry in your sights, they almost take shape of stars in your opinion. 
   So you set your sights on a particularly small black car in front of you, must be a Toyota or Avanza or something. You can’t tell, it’s got four wheels and headlights, so it’s a car. You could care less about what it is. That is why you weren’t all so interested when Chrollo took you a look into his….Rolls… Rolls what? Oh, right, Rolls Royce. It’s a fancy one, you can tell. He was exuding quite an air of importance when he was leading you towards the high-end vehicle located in the restaurant’s parking lot, there were some on-lookers around that spot that expressed interest at the car. It means something when even people of the middle-upper class are showing interest.
   Whatever ego that had probably swelled within Chrollo must’ve popped like a balloon, or so you hope, because you did nothing more than give him a thumbs up before letting yourself in the passenger’s seat. You also didn’t miss the way he was preparing to tell you about the car’s compartments and specialties that made it cost years of labor. Ah, you’re certain he didn’t gain this vehicle from labor, though. 
   Fancy car or not, everyone’s equally stuck in this traffic. 
   Fancy car or not, doesn’t determine that the song played inside the compartment is free from your judgment or not.
   “What song is this? You ask, although you know the answer. You somehow need an assurance that he is lucid. 
   “Please, please, please, by The Smiths.” He says, pleasant with his song of choice. 
   What an ironic song and artist of choice. 
    It’s harder to hide in a cackle than a scowl, you’d almost forgotten. Any voice you let out threatens to come out as sharp laughter and any breathe you intake threatens to become a wheeze. You could hardly contain yourself. 
   “Oh…” Is all you say before pausing, afraid anything else you will say will turn into a rowdy session of laughter. Unsure if you should speak further or not. But the inquisitive look he offers you somehow serves as a push rather than something that usually wants you to further seal your lips shut in fear you would say the wrong thing and earn his silent ire. It’s far, far harder to hide a cackle than a scowl, but months of training yourself to hide certain expressions whenever Chrollo is around has paid off. “What about Frank Sinatra?” 
 Chrollo smiles. Is he delighted that you find interest in one of his favorite artists? Though he’s never said it outloud, every long night drive has its silence filled with at least one Frank Sinatra song. 
   “Would you rather I change the song, dear?” He offers. And you would say yes, but this is one of the rare, rare moments where you are given the opportunity to take a jab at him. Although it’s nothing as deadly as anything a leader of the Phantom Troupe has faced, you won’t kill him or even hurt him for very long. But you are willing to do anything, at this point. 
   You feign the most pleasant voice you can muster, “Hm… That’s not really what I meant. I just didn’t think you’d listen to The Smiths.” 
   He lets out a small laugh, “Really? I have always listened to older songs around you, I suppose. I wouldn't say I like it… Hm, but it’s an interesting band.”
   So he does like it! 
   “Why do you think so?” You inquire further before adding, “Do you like this song a lot?”
   “Are you intending to interview me, (Name)?” Chrollo cocks his eyebrow, but it is only meant to tease you. 
  “Must’ve picked it up from someone.” A relentless pursuit, you press on further, “Okay though, but answer my question.” 
   Silence falls over him, as if he were in his own state of thinking so deeply, but you know it’s mainly a pretense. Whatever he wishes to say after, you know it must’ve been something he had thought of before. In any other situation, this silence often serves as to let a dreadful situation simmer in your mind.  But this time… Ah, you’re quite unsure. 
  Chrollo finally speaks,  “I’ll answer you of course.” The smile he gives you is anything but nice when you are very much aware of the condemnation those same lips bring you, “On the condition you’d kiss me after.”
  “Okay.” To his surprise, you agreed rather quickly. If that’s the sacrifice you need to make, then so be it. A kiss to soothe his soon-to-be sour, scorned face!
  He is satisfied, you can tell. He puts his elbow against the steering wheel, resting his face against his palm. “I don’t know why you’re suddenly interested, whatever designs you have in your head… Hm, I’ll know of it soon.” 
   No one fucking asked damn. You internally deadpanned, impatience is gnawing at your throat. He reminds you of how you’d write your essays when you have to reach a certain minimum word count by relentlessly dragging around a topic and beating around a bush so much that you end up writing a novel rather than an assignment. Ah… To make him anything alike to you doesn’t sound very right. Whatever, you digress. 
   Chrollo finally, finally starts. And you’re excited, elated, jovial- ah every synonym of the word happiness comes into mind. You can put any thesaurus at shame by now. “I remember the first time we met, you called me something of a hopeless romantic. At that time, I had only laughed because I found the sentiment rather off. Such nonsense. Me? An idealist of love? Love has always been a tool for me. You could only dream.”
   You cut to the chase,“Mhm, although you’ve found a contradiction because you actually enjoy those sappy songs right? Okay, what’s next?” 
   “You know me very well (You smile, excited). But that's not all (you frown, deflated).” Sweet, saccharine drips off of his voice. “I’ve never paid attention to such things, not for myself at least. I don’t ‘relate’ to those kinds of songs. But ever since I met you, it felt as if the world had shifted for me.” 
  He doesn’t stop, and for once you are glad he isn't, “My world has shifted and taken a hole in itself, one that has been carved into the shape of you.” 
  It is interesting how he is able to muse so freely about you, in front of you. Where is the shame and decorum?
   “And I do quite like this song, in all honesty.” His gaze meets yours, and grey eyes bore into your soul. “It really does remind me of the one I love so dearly.” 
   Please, please, please, let me get what I want… Those lyrics loop in your head over and over again. You should be sick with the abundance of affection he has for you that makes you seethe. And you would claw at the leather seats, avert your gaze, and try to block him out as much as you can. But tonight, you feel fucking amazing. 
  You can barely handle it. 
   “Dude, come on,” Your voice is off by an octave and you swear you can burst. Chrollo on the other hand finds satisfaction melting off of his face over the term being used to refer to him, outright calling him a bastard or a monster might be better. You make it a mental note to call him ‘dude’ more. “The Smiths is for losers.” 
   …
   “Pardon?’ 
   “The Smiths is for losers.” You repeat yourself before adding, “It’s for guys who can’t get any, for guys who waddle in sadness for something they can’t get, guys who are always up their own ass. Condescending guys who are secretly insecure, manipulative guys, guys who play guitar and get sad then do weed…” You are kind enough to give a long-winded further explanation.  Chrollo does not share the same sentiment. 
  Chrollo’s countenance seems unchanging at first, but it is not a waste, for you saw a split second of confusion, then something of offense written on his face before it smoothes out into the uncannily still expression he always wears. His lips open, then close, as if he’s mulling over an answer.
   “Are you insinuating I am that type of person, dearest?’ 
   "I mean if the shoe fits...? Well, what do you think?"
    He sighs like it’s obvious,  “That you made the wrong accusation over baseless data.” 
    “I’m not accusing you of anything!” You hold your hands up in mock defense, “Just telling you something everyone kind of agrees on. Things don’t have to be written in numbers or books… Sometimes it’s just a consensus. Everyone and their mom agrees on it."
   You are relentless tonight, so you continue again though Chrollo prompts nothing from your newfound talkative nature tonight, something you’re sure he would actually love in a different situation. 
   “These are the kind of guys girls avoid you know? People call it something of a warning. Like, ‘avoid guys who listen to The Smiths’.  I don’t mean to generalize or anything, but guys who listen to songs like that don’t end up to be very well in the head. And I also don’t mean to believe rumors but… Well…” You cough awkwardly, but it’s meant to deliver an unspoken message you know will only further test his ire. But you think you have had enough fun for tonight, you don’t wish to turn the night sour for you after all.
   …Or so you thought. 
   “So I’m just trying to say that you should treat me a little better, you know what I mean? I’m putting up with a lot” Everything you say here are meant to be a 50% insult, 30% jab, and 20% jokes. But the last thing you said, you can’t lie and say that you hope he’d take further thought on that. You yearn to hopefully be able to get out of the hotel room that serves as your grandiose cage more, and when you do, you aren’t being watched by an unknown amount of eyes that you know trail on to you by the shadows. That is all you wish for, really. That is to say, you can only wonder what his standards are for ‘treating you better’. 
   Ah, the smile he has on his face is different from before. This one is a sign that your fun is coming to a quick halt. 
   “So that’s what you’re getting at? Resourceful little minx you are.” 
   Why is he sounding so delighted over your insults, is he a masochist? Is he stupid? It’s your turn to cock your eyebrow. 
  “Have you enticed me in this long-winded conversation simply because you wanted to be treated a little better? And the way you had agreed so quickly to that kiss… " He puts a hand to his chest, a mockery of an apology. "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn’t mean to be so blind to your need for affection. You've gone through lengths to communicate your need, I'm very grateful."
  You let out a humorless laugh, “Pardon?” He is just truly-! Argh, whatever! “Did you not hear anything else I said?” You make sure to enunciate your words properly, afraid he might have some sort of hearing problems, well he does and you’re certain it has a name. What was it again? Oh right, an unfortunate combination of delusion and selective hearing… 
  “I know you tend to turn a little childish when you can’t get what you want. That’s not a quality many men like either. So, be a little kinder to me, won’t you?” 
  “Women don’t usually like mass murderers either. Anyone in their right mind, actually.”
   He hums, “That orange container of pills by your nightstand says otherwise. Not the best defense, try again?” 
   “You'd have some too, you just don't have any because you don't go to therapy."
   “Hm, keeping up that attitude won’t make me kiss you any sooner.” 
   “Then I’ll gladly keep this attitude!” 
   Unfortunately you don’t. You’re angry enough to have the energy to spew a million insults at lightspeed against him, but too angry to form a coherent thought that you’re certain would give him a decent jab. And to be frank, you’re rather spent. When you (reluctantly) asked Chrollo what time it was, thankfully he gave you a proper response. A quick tap of his phone showed that it was two and a half hours above your usual bedtime. The clothes you have aren’t the most comfortable either, while it’s not short they certainly expose areas where the wind would have too much fun dancing over. 
   Traffic is clearing as you can see the hotel you are both staying in come into view. You relax at the sight. You can almost feel the warm bath you will be soaking yourself in, what scent will you choose tonight? Rosemary, lavender… Ah, you can smell them already. You prompt to close your eyes for a moment of rest, but you find yourself sleeping on the rest of the way back.
   You feel fingers combing your locks stirring you awake, they’re Chrollo’s, obviously. Although you are half conscious, you recognize that scent of sandalwood and amber anywhere, as much as you’re ashamed to admit it. 
  “Do you want me to carry you?” Chrollo asks, and you murmur something in between a noise of annoyance and a ‘no’. He chuckles at this sight. “Alright then.” 
   He gives a soft peck on your lips, it’s warm. You almost lean in when the warmth of his lips leave yours, this half-conscious state gives him a moment of your vulnerability he has set his eyes on,  the one he relentlessly pursues after so much. But you know that even when he has a grasp at your vulnerability, it won’t stop him from digging for more. Greedy, ruthless man that he is, he will never stop. 
  “You are absolutely precious, you know that? Even if your mouth tends to run without care” Is that condescension or admiration in his voice? Pity, you can’t tell in the state you are in. You’re drunk from the lack of sleep and the future victory you have in mind. 
  “Before I answer that…” Your voice is barely above a whisper, Chrollo merrily leans in closer to hear you. Your lips ghost by the shell of his ear… 
  …
  “Name five songs from The Smiths. Are you like an actual fan or is it just FOMO?” 
   He just sighs. 
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spikedhe4rt · 29 days
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Need more sub Dallas smut 🤭👀 possibly him getting hard at a bad time when you kissed him
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Word Count: 1440
A/N: hi pookies. DID YALL MISS ME :) Im sorry i haven't updated!! happy new year? Back with a good one tho!! also follow my tiktok: spikedhe4rt bc i don't really care who sees my face fr! I LOVE YALL AND I HOPE YOU ENJOY!
✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
Dallas never really showed his submissive side infront of others. Only me. His reputation was important to him, what would others think if they knew he gets on his knees and begs just for the chance to fuck me. Im his girlfriend, the girl that makes everyone jealous because "shes getting fucked by Dally". Its boosts his ego so I let it happen.
Dallas, after tons of convincing got me to go out for night with him. I never been a huge fan of parties. Dally on the other hand was a party animal, dragging along two-bit for his shenanigans constantly. Two had better things to do, surprisingly, so he looped me in.
"Dally, I thought Two bailing on you would inspire you to take a break" I told him as I looked at myself in a full body mirror.
"Nah. The party animal in me never stops, doll" He says in response, I roll my eyes at his comment.
I hear his footsteps creak against the floorboards as he comes up behind me. His arms wrapped my waist, warm hands coming to touch my stomach. I reached my hand up to touch his hair as i leaned into him. "I can count on you behaving tonight-" I tugged his hair to bring him closer to my level "-hm?"
A quick flash of desperation came over his face before that signature smirk. "Yes ma'am" I flipped myself around so our chests were touching, "Good boy. You ready?" I asked with a toothy smile. He nodded, grabbing my hand to lead me to the door.
We decided to walk to the party because Tim's wasn't that far. After we got there, I picked a corner for us to stay in. I know its a party but sometimes you just need a moment. Dallas decides to venture off and catch up with his pals. I take a sip of my beer as I sit with my legs crossed, scanning the room.
I decide to find Dally in boredom, I spot him with Tim and some other guy. I walk over and tap him, he opens his arms to invite me to sit on his lap. "Hi, Dal." I say in a sultry tone.
He says nothing, pulling me closer to him and continuing to talk. At some point, Tim and whoever the hell he was left, leaving me and Dally alone.
After a little bit of talking, I go to the bathroom, needing to pee. As I washed my hands, I heard the laughter of people outside. One particular laugh stuck out to me, some girl sounding like a damn bird. I laughed to myself and walked out.
My face quickly changed when I saw the scene in front of me. The cackle came from a girl talking to Dallas. " Oh my god. Dallas, you're so funny" she exclaimed. His face read confusion "All I said was my name-"
I smiled to myself before walking up to Dally and kissing him feverishly. I got up on his lap as we continued. I heard heels click as I ran my hand down his chest. I smirked as I felt his cock get harder against me. At a party? I pulled away to look at him with a cocky expression. "All it takes is a kiss and a hand down your chest for you to get hard like desperate slut, huh?" I whispered in shell of his ear.
His body leaned into mine, before he whispered back "Please- Can we go to the bathroom" I beamed. "Im glad y'know who you belong to," I told him before jumping off his lap and leading him to the bathroom. I made sure to lock it behind us.
His lips captured mine as soon as I turned around. Dallas's tongue quickly slipped into my mouth. The kiss was hot and passionate, feeling like he never needed anything more in this moment. Fuck. The feeling of wetness flooding my underwear as I started to grind against him.
"I need you so bad..."
"Baby please"
"You're so beautiful, fuck"
Praises and pleas spilled from his lips. My lips curled into a smile and Dally's hands came down to my ass. I started to kiss his neck, my lips lightly pressed into the supple skin. "You're such a good boy for not entertaining her. You deserve a reward." My hand came to rub his hard-on over his jeans. "You want my mouth on your cock, hm?"
He nods.
"Use your words like you want it" I rebutted. 
"Yes- Shit right there" he interrupted himself as my hand slipped into underwear past his denim.
I brushed hand along his cock, sending goosebumps against his skin. My knees touched the floor as I pulled down on his jeans and briefs.
I placed kisses down his hard cock, making him let out a deep breath. "You're such a slut for my touch, aren't you?" I asked looking up at him. "Yes, ma'am" he breathed. Thats new.
I take the head of his cock in my mouth, swirling my tongue around the tip. I smile as I him almost fully in my mouth. My other hand came to message his balls, rolling through skin in my fingers. Another moan spilled from Dallas's lips "Please. Can I guide you?" he asked in a low voice. "Mhm" I hummed with him still in my mouth.
Dally's hand rested on my head before he started to slowly move it up and down. His tip hit the back of my throat lightly as he whimpered. Dallas's hips bucked in my mouth harshly, making me gag a little. He continued to lightly fuck my mouth as I rubbed my hand on his meaty thigh.
I pulled off him, looking up "You're such a good boy baby, You wanna cum for me?" His lip was caught between his teeth as he nodded. I gave him a knowing look, "Yes yes. Let me cum. Please" he said, vocalizing what he wants.
Mouth came back down to his tip, swirling my tongue on the tip once again. Both my hands came to stroke his cock. Dally choked on a moan. "Fuck, please don't stop. G-gonna cum" He was loud but we didn't care at the moment.
I felt the taste of his cum a minute later as his body lightly shook. "You did so good for me" I praised his as I lifted myself off the ground. I immediately captured his lips, the taste of his own cum flooding his mouth. "You think you can handle another, hm? Ill let you fuck me for your behavior." He nodded, still drunk from his orgasm.
I jumped up on the counter, the cold material resting against my thighs. Dally pulled my pants and underwear down in a swift movement. I brought my hand down to my pussy, collecting my arousal. My fingers came up to his mouth, he accepted them quickly and bobbing his head. Dallas desperately aligned his cock with my hole, bottom out inside
Dally let out a whine, "Oh...I love so much" I smiled at his words "Mhm...You love me and pussy so much, don't you? Say it, you can do it." His thrusts started off slow as I lightly clenched down on him. "I love you and your pussy so much. Shit" His hands came around my hips and head fell into my neck.
Dallas's thrust became faster and more aggressive as he groaned into my neck. He soon started placing open mouth kisses on my neck, increasing the euphoria I was feeling. His balls slapped against my ass with each thrust. "Mm. You're making me feel so good" I told as I moaned.
My walls flutter around his cock as I feel my orgasm getting closer. Dally's pants get louder, his hair getting light moist with sweat. "You're so handsome like this. Keep fucking me, just like that" I take my hand from Dally's shoulder to rub my clit, increasing my pleasure.
I topple over the edge with a loud moan, my orgasm making legs shake. Dallas's thrust stay at the current pace, with him chasing his own peak. "Baby can I cum please" he says with a groan. His face stayed in my neck as he moaned. "Look at my when you cum, sweetheart. you can do it, hmm?" I coo.
He looks up at me with low eyes.
"Good job, go ahead." I say with a smirk.
Dallas's eyes roll back in his head as he cums inside me. I kiss him as he rides his high. Good behavior deserves good rewards.
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kitybur · 9 months
Text
𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐩𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐭 | 𝐢𝐬𝐚𝐚𝐜𝐰𝐡𝐲
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⌦ in which you, your silly friends and silly boyfriend move in together & what i think would happen.
— warnings: gn!reader, craziness, fluff, swearing
| can you write some headcannons abt how y/n would be with the rest of the group! or how the group would react to isaac and y/n hehe ANYWAY THANK U SM , love all of your content |
⋆。゚☁︎。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆
• to start off, i think we can agree that living with the boys would actually be HELL.
• like you’d have to be scrubbing the house top to bottom after filming a groupchat video. but for the sake of this, let’s ignore the bad side 🤗.
• the boys would definitely love you, and treat you like their sibling (everyone but isaac ofc). they would probably be a little overprotective of you, but that’s them showing they care.
• you’re getting ready for a party? when and where. someone’s making you uncomfortable? who needs to step in. you feel me??
• these men would never fail to make you laugh if you were having a bad day. like if you had a bad day at school or work, they would instantly have you in cackles.
• they always make sure they try to include you. if you weren’t a streamer, they would make sure that you get some screen time if you like to be on film. if you don’t, they make sure that you at least go on adventures with them (especially willy vlogs)
• okay independently tho.. i feel like softwilly would be the one to include you in most things (if you weren’t a streamer like we just established). idk he looks like the type of person who wouldn’t want to leave anyone out or behind. if you were a streamer, he’d still try to include you on recordings.
• yumi definitely would not give two shits im ngl 😭 he does his own thing so i feel like he just wouldn’t bother with you (in the nicest way possible) if you didn’t want to hang out or go film a vlog. but he’s definitely like one of the funniest people when you get to know him so he’s basically your main bitch when you’re sad.
• larry would definitely be your best friend. he’s got such a sweet personality that you’d instantly click and just do stupid shit together. like you’d play loud music at four in the morning and wake everyone up because you saw a tiktok dance you wanted to try ☠️ i just feel like larry would be easy to get along with.
• along with larry, i also feel like grunk would be easy to get along with. you’d both go out shopping since he’s lowkey got drip and you’d bond over it. i feel like if grunk got close enough to you, he’d ask to watch spongebob together. whether it’s over discord or irl. it’s a special moment y’all get to have to hang out.
• tanner would be your workout buddy. he’d make sure that he spots you and vice versa, and make sure that you aren’t breaking your bones doing a new workout. if you don’t workout, he’d be your horror game buddy. tanner would even just have you in the room because he gets jumpy. and if he gets too pissed off he’d make you play. and just constantly grab your shoulders to scare you.
• and lastly, we have isaac. in this case, isaac is your bf and lord he would be the best boyfriend. 🙏 like he’s actually super tall and muscular that he would give GREAT hugs. bro and the best cuddles. literally could crush you and that’s lowkey hot 🫡.
• but no, isaac would definitely be your muse. he’s definitely got that golden retriever type vibe, maybe slight black cat. isaac would be the best at massages. idk why that came to my head. i feel like with his large hands he’d be able to give great back or shoulder massages.
• isaac would buy you a bunch of shit, like he does for the house. it could be something totally stupid and he’d be like “but it’s useful in so many ways” or “it’s cute!” when it’s really fucking ugly but you’d never tell him that.
• you WILL constantly hear gagging sounds from the rest of the members whenever you and isaac are in mere 2 feet of each other. mostly from yumi and softwilly. but it’s all jokes! most the time..
• they will also make kissing sounds when you two walk out of isaac’s bedroom and ask if you used protection. even if you have literally just woken up.
• larry and tanner would recreate any lovey dovey thing you guys do, but make it 10x more funnier. any photo y’all post together, they copy it and tag you both.
• ^^ stop tell me you can’t see that happening 😭😭
• grunk would be the supportive bsf but will threaten isaac if he takes you away when you’re supposed to watch spongebob together.
• overall, i think living with them would be such a hassle, but if you plan it right it may be fun. if you love cleaning and screaming children at midnight, this is right up your alley ‼️
• ‘kay but y’all gotta agree that living with them would actually be so fun cause they’re funny and have an amazing time doing actually anything. like they could make any regular night into an eventful night that would end in the kitchen a mess, empty cans in the floor and bodies sleeping anywhere they can find comfortable.
• and those are our youtubers/streamers 🥹
⋆。゚☁︎。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆
a/n: okay pls tell me if you agree or disagree with any of these cause i was just going off the top of my head but i wanna hear what y’all have to say about it too! i didn’t really know what to write for this so it’s all based on my opinion and how i see it. i hope this fulfills your request!
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Ichiban x Saeko look Is adorable he respects her as a woman and she clearly has the biggest crush on him 💋
yeah :)
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torasplanet · 3 months
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no but like here me out, toxic!armin sharing you with eren tho🤭
he sitting back relaxing on the sofa while having you sit on his dick with eren's plopped happily in your mouth just listening to you take all of it, not a gag heard. armin isn't surprised about that though. he taught you better than that.
a grin forms on his face as he watches your nails dig into eren's legs as he stands in front of you just fucking your face "takin' that so good aren't you?" armin said leaning forward and placing his chin on your shoulder "like eren's better than mine, don't you?" see, armin doesn't believe that shit when he says it. why would he? you're at his feet practically every day for something to fill your guts.
he just likes to say it to fuck with you. to see those hot globs of tears run down your pretty little face "n-no!" you replied pulling your mouth away from eren's dick as his grip on your hair finally allowed it but still tight as ever.
"really? seems to me that that dick making my pretty baby drool." armin said grabbing your chin as droplets of drool ran down your lip. your mouth was still open slopping out moans making the drooling worse than eren's dick did.
eren grinned and pulled your hair forcing you to look up "yeah, not nice of ya' to like me more. slut shit." he said staring down at you teasingly. you went to say something but nothing but pathetic moans came out as your cunt tightened around armin's thick dick. "aw, you wanna cum? is it because of me or eren?" armin spat in your ear making eren cackle maniacally.
your eyes were hot and soon getting watery with the laughing between the two men clearly directed at you. armin's so mean to you but he always makes sure you cum and that he's the one to do it.
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©torasplanet .ᐟ reblogs and likes are very appreciated! pls do not repost!!
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wonysugar · 6 months
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hate rodrigo (literally) | aeri uchinaga
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a/n: this is not even a fic this is a tiny little one shot that i wrote yesterday night AT LIKE TWO AM due to thoughts we had in a discord server ahem anyways I FELL ASLEEP THO. soo have this now!!
genre : really bad crack smut like i genuinely have no idea how to describe this
word count : like 600 something?
tags : one shot, smut (obvs), crack, ptv mention, falling in reverse mention, olivia Rodrigo mention, mcr mention, taylor swift mention (sorry @pupyuj)
pairing : angsty!giselle x whitegirlmusic!femreader (I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO LABEL THISSFJEKF)
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your music taste wasn’t something you particularly shared with people, but you didn’t hide it, either. to you, it was music, nothing more, nothing less.
however, one of your friends, aeri, took music very, very seriously, and it really showed. she had a certain aesthetic, she wore certain things and god, did she listen to certain music.
“no like i genuinely can’t grasp the fact that you unironically listen to olivia rodrigo?” she laughed, leaning back on her bed as you stared at her in disbelief.
“god aeri, some of her songs are good, you just haven’t tried them.” you snapped back, wearing a convinced smile as you proceed to jokingly hit her arm.
“okay, sure, whatever. but just imagine getting to know someone, going on dates with them, all the sha-bang. then, when it’s time to get down and freaky, they turn on their sex playlist and motherfucking driver’s license starts playing??”
she was basically cackling at that point and you couldn’t do anything to stop it. defending your cause seemed like it would’ve been difficult, with how far up her own ass she was.
“yeah, because that isn’t a sex song? olivia rodrigo doesn’t make fucking sex music?? try putting a falling in reverse song while you get naked, see how that works out for you.” you fight back.
“oh i don’t know about you, but i’d be soaked for sure. plus, anything would be better than hearing young adult women sing about their previous relationship like it was a war they fought in.” she kid, crossing her arms in victory, as if she even won the argument in the first place.
“i’m gonna make you swallow those words right back up, uchinaga.”
“try me, l/n.”
-
“f-fuck y/n, go- mmh- slower..”
so, it wasn’t supposed to happen this way!
it originally was just the both of you, taking turns and putting different songs on the bluetooth speaker and rating them based on ‘how wet it got you’.
turns out, while that was a theory stage, there seemed to be a practice one too, and you’ve been in it for the past 10 minutes now.
thrusting your fake cock in and out of her, paying no mind to the very loud, very obnoxious pierce the veil song that was playing in the background, you pinned her hands above her head. your pace increased with time, and the decibels of her voice increased with the pace.
“oh my god y/n pleasepleasepleasepleasee i’m s-so sorry i- fuck me- i didn’t mean-“ she cried, poor thing probably didn’t even realize that her black eyeliner was running all over her cheeks. her arms and legs wrapped around you,
“shut your fucking mouth and take it, you emo fucking cumslut.” you slammed your strap into her as she yelled out your name. while she was pleading and begging for something, you were on top of her perfect laying-in-mcr-bedsheets body.
she, herself, wasn’t aware of what she was begging for, her mind was completely blank. all she could think about was how good her pussy felt when you pounded it so violently, when you were being so aggressive with her that you just used her body however you wanted.
you thought that whole thing would be a one-time occurrence, but no, it happened a second time, when she said that taylor swift had mid music. was she doing it on purpose or something?
anyways,
yes, you fucked her with the 1989 album playing.
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