#interesting points ty 4 discussing w me anon!

[rollercoasterwords]

hello!

this is a little bit away from your last post but i think a lot of “hot take activism” has stemmed from oh they have a point! i’m going to drive this in further so i don’t look like a bad person!

even though some hot takes are subject to opinion

for example a lot of fan fiction writers have been slated for their E rating on mlm fanfiction and many of the critics are cishet women, whilst men in the fandom have taken no issue

now if a man were to take issue that’s entirely valid however a lot of people critique unprompted which then leads to a kind of mob mentality in a way where all of a sudden all explicit mlm fics are crucified and deemed fetishisation (even though no one had a problem before this one critique)

a friend of mine had written a fic that had been quite popular in a small fandom and was basically bullied until it was taken down even after he explained that he himself was a gay male

i’m all for calling out harmful issues when necessary: call a spade a spade

but i think sometimes people’s intention can be misconstrued and imo more harmful than the actual writing itself

(i’m on 2 hours of sleep and i have more to say! but i’m gonna keep this anonymous just in case i wake up and think “i didn’t mean to phrase it like that” although i think i got my general point across)

yeah i mean. i tend to think that most online discourse which takes nuanced issues and boils them down to one or two sentences is more about virtue signaling and performing morality for an audience than it is any sort of real activism, because flattening what should be a complex conversation does more harm than good. i don't necessarily think it's all ill-intentioned though, more just....people falling prey to the social media panopticon unfortunately

one thing i do wanna push back on a little though is that it seems like you're placing a lot of emphasis on the identity of the critics/people being critiqued, and that is part of what i'm trying to stay away from. like u say many of the critics are cishet women, but is that true? how do u know? do they all have "cishet" in their bios or something? like i'm not being sarcastic here and i'm not trying to be snippy, i am genuinely just like. asking u to reflect a bit on this point and get back to me. because part of what i said in my original post is that even if u are 100% sure about the way someone identifies, it still is not productive to treat identity as a fixed and static category. someone who identifies as a cishet woman could identify as something completely different the next day, and that's entirely valid imo

similarly, when u say "well it's different if a man takes issue with it," i just...do not necessarily think that's true. obviously it is important to take into account the ways in which someone's gender identity will affect their personal experiences and inform their critique, but i think the content of that critique matters more than the specific identity of the person making it, y'know?

like, i don't want to unfairly represent either side of this conversation. and if one side is people going "oh everyone writing these explicit mlm stories is cishet women!!" and the other side is going "oh everyone complaining about fetishization is cishet women!!" do u see how. both of those stances are operating from the same premise. and will therefore never be able to have a productive dialogue with each other. personally, my impression is that the majority of the people involved in this conversation on both sides are not, in fact, cishet women--at least in the marauders fandom. i'm not going to say that's 100% the case because it's impossible to do any sort of statistical analysis, especially given the fluid nature of identity. but do u see how the fact that we have different perceptions of who is actually talking about this makes a focus on identity in and of itself a bit of a non-starter for talking through the issue?

i do agree w u that mob mentality is a big part of this though, and what happened to your friend sucks + is definitely an example of the way this sort of policing around who can write what is ultimately going to hurt queer people more than it does anything to like. dismantle systemic homophobia. but i just wanna reiterate that the core of the issue to me is not so much "people are taking the conversation too far" as it is "the premise of this conversation seems to rely on an understanding of identity that is rooted in gender essentialism."

#interesting points ty 4 discussing w me anon! #think we agree for the most part but just wanna make sure that like #my core critique is coming across y’know #ask #ranting and raving

[angeldormante]

Hi!! Im the Leo-withdrawal anon! I didnt ask anything prior to the one you just answered, but I'm so happy you responded! I'd honestly listen to anything you write--I think you have a wonderful way of expressing yourself, and the way you write is just... *chef's kiss* I guess, a question I'd have for you is this: What sort of hobbies do you headcanon our fearless leader to have? Quirks? Both endearing and... less so? I think that'd be a fun start!

hokay.... finally getting around to this!! sorry for the wait and thank you for bearing with me, anon! (ty for the compliment, too -- i'm very flattered jfjflk i just like talking about turtles ok (•̥ ̫ •̥) )

now... lemme talk blue to ya.

if we're talking about hobbies, well. stop me if you think you've heard this before -- leo loves training. for all of the guys, ninjutsu is a way of life; it's how they survive the world, how they connect with themselves and one another; it's their entire culture that the foundations of their family is built upon. and that's super neat. but watch 2k3 for like, one episode, and you'll very quickly see that the only one that fully leans into it is leo. mikey and don have their own interests that they often can't get to quickly enough once the day's training session ends. i think raph actually enjoys training recreationally as well -- but he's more interested in the physical aspect, spending his energy, bulking up, not necessarily focusing on skill or technique. i like to imagine that growing up, leo and raph spent a lot of time in the dojo together doing their own thing, kind of "separate but together"; before casey came along and raph got into hanging out topside with him.

leo, though, he throws himself fully into training. he's incredibly dedicated to it not only because of his sense of responsibility, but because he genuinely enjoys it -- he enjoys improving his technique, his skill. he enjoys the repetition of learning, which helps to calm and center him. he enjoys meditation, which helps him focus and clear his mind. as an introvert, and precisely because his family doesn't hang around the dojo as often as he does, leo's solo training time is his time -- it's his chance to relax and decompress. i think it's exactly why he spiraled harder and harder in season 4 no matter how much training he did: at that point, it was no longer a hobby, but an obsession. leonardo normally uses training as a healthy outlet, but when he channeled his exodus trauma into it, he removed his main method of decompression and replaced it with the intent to fuel that exact trauma. (sidebar, though i've talked about it before: i also feel like this is why fast forward is so excellent at showing leo's character growth. he is extremely zen and such a huge advocate of healthy self-reflection in the way he coaches cody and his clone. my sweet boy, so proud of him in that season.)

now i know what you may be thinking. and you're right. there's more to leo than his life in the dojo... so let's talk about some other hobbies i like to think he has!

so here's the thing, and i think it's something else i've touched on before... but i think leo actually has a very strong bond with donnie. their temperaments are very similar, they feel similar burdens when it comes to protecting the family, etc... and to be honest, i think they bond a lot over the same nerdy hobbies too! i think leo is a huge freaking nerd.

i legit think that donatello has probably absorbed his brother into more than one of his hobbies, both unwillingly and not. some things click for leo, and some things don't. some things he has a hard time getting into until he discovers a certain aspect of it or views it from a different perspective. but he is very often willing to try anything.

for example, i imagine that growing up, leo and don played a lot of chess together. don used to overwhelmingly win, until they got older and older leo got deeper and deeper into the tactical aspect, and soon he was beating don quite soundly more often than he wasn't. don started getting into engineering manuals and physics books, while leo started getting into history texts and military treatises, but both shared a love for novels and would swap their favorites regularly. and they still play chess, of course.

don got into nerdy sci-fi shows. like, really into them. and leo couldn't quite pick up the thread on that one, but he was content to endure every fourth movie night when it was don's turn to pick. and slowly he began getting drawn into it, the same way anyone does -- he enjoyed the campiness of the plot, how absolutely ludicrous the fight choreography was, how sometimes there were actually deep and thoughtful moments. it was both a welcome respite from the intensity of his reality and something he could put to practical use if he had to, like, steal a spaceship one day, though the odds of that happening seemed pretty low⁽ˡᵒˡ⁾. he was never able to quote any of the episodes verbatim like donnie, but it was something they could discuss and lightly bicker about during the times when leo is mindlessly helping out around don's lab. (more on that in a sec.)

also? i can absolutely. totally. easily see leo as a tabletop game enthusiast. i think i'll refrain from getting lost in the weeds on that once, since this is already starting to run long, but i just want to put that in your mind. tmnt dnd gaming nights. let that sit for a second.

okay moving on.

i genuinely think that leo just likes existing in the general vicinity of his family and extended family. not necessarily doing anything; just being there, doing something with his hands. if don is working on a project, leo may drift in, and don will ask him to hand him certain tools or read aloud certain notes on the screen, because he knows the deal. if raph is lifting weights and leo wanders over from his own training session, raph may ask him to spot, or set up the next pair of weights, because he knows how it is. if mikey is sitting in the living room playing video games and leo appears on the couch next to him, he might toss him a controller, or he may just start blabbering about what game he's playing and what level he's on, because he's got it. if april and casey are tidying up her shop for a new shipment of merchandise and leo just randomly appears in the window, feathered duster in hand, april smiles and puts on water for tea and casey teases him and throws him a broom instead without blinking. because that's just how leo is.

the thing is, leo is one of those people who have such a strong presence that -- as long as he's not trying to hide it, of course -- you know he's there because he carries such an atmosphere with him. on the other hand, leonardo is the type of person who is genuinely content to just be in the background. which may sound totally at odds with the whole leader schtick, but i think it's just kind of this duality he has: he can be both at the forefront and in the background, depending on the situation and what is needed from him. does this mean he doesn't have his own hobbies or interests? of course not! but even canonically, throughout the series leo is shown to be just as happy with his hands off the reins so long as there's not a mission in front of him. and i think it's precisely this lack of that constant need for control that shows just how whole and rich leo's inner life is, how he feels full and complete without his leadership/big brother role completely defining him, and how season 4 rips that carpet from under his feet to show the unhealthy side of that particular coin.

so as much as a cop-out answer it may sound like -- i think that leo just enjoys doing things with his brothers. he likes rooftop runs with them. he likes pizza and cards with them. he likes movies, sports, and games with them. but he's also his own person, and he enjoys being in his head, and he has hobbies that help him make his head a healthy place to be; his family absolutely respects that quality, and leonardo is a much more well adjusted person for it.

er.... i didn't really get into quirks or bad habits, but this has run really long already and it's getting late, lmao. so i think i will stop here for now. =w= thank you for letting me ramble again about my blue boy, anon; i know i'm slow, but hopefully i rambled enough to make up for it!

#tmnt #tmnt 2003 #leonardo #meta #long post #if u aren't sick of me.... ofc i'd be happy to talk about the rest sometime flkjfds

[minniti]

wilde anon: ahh, can we discuss rainbow rowell for a bit? i read eleanor and park, then carry on, then fangirl then carry on again and i gotta say, her comments about fanfic don't sit well with me for a number of reasons. first, yeah, some of her stories (especially carry on, duh) read like fanfic. in a bad way. and you and i both know fanfic can be Great, we have probably both read a bunch of Ethereal Whimsical Fancy-Ass fanfic (you know the type) pt 1

wilde anon pt 2: hell, imo aria is a wonderfully thought out piece of work w romantic/aesthetic (as in genres) subtones, i followed u for that. but hers reads like cheap fic — the equivalent of chick lit in fic. and i know it sounds So Pretentious and i don't want it to be, i've read good Cheap books, even good kids books, but everything is so flimsy in carry on. and she identified the problem without addressing it: often fic authors rely on backstory we already know, so they don't have to

wilde anon pt 3: do any worldbuilding, any backstory, anything. but when you do that with an original piece, Especially in a fantasy setting, the writing becomes so immature and easily breakable. and there's another thing (i said multiple reasons, remember?): rainbow's books are different from fic because they end, and they have a plot. she lies when she says writing fanfic is forgetting about the plot. we know that's true sometimes, but not the fic she's trying to imitate. the one she mimicks

wilde anon part... 4?: the one she mimicks is the one that's only plot. bc we know the characters and setting and there's nothing to prove/say, it just goes and then they do this and then they do that, endlessly sometimes. and this is nice /when you are invested in the characters already/. not so nice in an original novel. so her plot's usually watertight: she ties it all in nicely with a bow right at the end, ms marple monologue style. nothing makes sense till the last pages, that's why

wilde anon part 5 jeeZ: (i forgot where i left off) so the plot is aimless until the end, where the characters are sort of quickly trying to tie up their own mess? like in fangirl, where why the hell is levi with cath except because Rainbow Wants a Happily Ever After? rainbow, unlike a fic writer, takes possession of her characters fully. when she says cath wants to kill baz because "it's the only way", she doesn't understand fic writing. that sounds like novel writing, like being stuck but___

damn i am living for this rainbow rowell drag 😩😩my sister read some of her books and didn’t really love them either, so i’m not gonna start them anytime soon esp with your take on them

and i’m sort of also living for your analysis of her bringing herself closer to fanfic culture even when her writing doesn’t necessarily follow it. seems very much like she’s playing to a base for support and her “roots” so to speak... do you see it as ingenuine ?? that’s really interesting you bring the point about plot up because i’ll be honest, i have very rarely found plot fic now that i think about it... i can think of like one phanfic though i guess i came across a lot of them in the harry potter fandom when i was in it at like 12 lmao ... super intriguing... i always think about what hurts me as a fic writer as i’d really like to get something published one day, and like we said, the place is a great playground but who knows what we’re missing out you know. crazy shit. also holy shit ty for writing so much i always appreciate such well thought out asks omg

#answered #anon #wilde anon #you need a better tag also i need to update and tag all of then asfhdj #Anonymous

[sunsetsover]

Thoughts on some of the asks you've had recently!!

1. I think outside of Stan Tumblr and Twitter where there is anti-Whitney sentiment from some corners, Callum is likely being viewed with a lot of sympathy right now. Part of this is because he's nice and likeable, showing sympathetic symptoms etc. And part bc he's a former soldier w named PTSD... like I don't think I need to elaborate on why people accept that particular narrative more easily!!

2. Like anon I also appreciate that you shared your thoughts on Ben having BPD and how we can view his character through that. I also know someone on Twitter has put forward a good case for Ben having cPTSD which I think fits too (and it's not like he can't have just one lol)

3. Having said that if the EE writers so much as touch on Ben having cPTSD I predict Stan Twitter might just implode w rage bc it's "Callum's Thing" and "Ben shouldn't have an excuse for his actions" 🥴 And again tying into making it a competition, but also Callum being a recognisable face of PTSD as a soldier/police who can be sympathised w vs Ben who... isn't that lmao. I doubt it'll ever happen bc I'm not sure the writers/audience are ready to confront PTSD caused by childhood trauma and an unsympathetic person living w it, especially when it implicates Phil whose like the face of the show lmao

4. I'm looking at a lot of this rn w interest because it really does epitomise the acceptable vs unacceptable mental illness, what trauma is recognised and amed and what isn't, which actions are viewed as forgivable vs which actions label you a Bad Person.

5. I think this discourse (lol) is a bit different to Isaac's story bc the Callum/Ben conversations are more about reactions to two characters and how their mh is received and treated by fans and the writers and how the very fact Callum has named PTSD says a lot abt certain sterotypes/attitudes. Whereas Isaac's story is ongoing and will deliberately seek to challenge similar stereotypes by using other characters as mouthpieces for different stereotyped views of his illness. Idk does that make sense? The Ballum stuff is a discussion that sits v much outside of the canon writing as a critique if how and why characters get certain labels and stories, while Isaac's is a canon issue led story??

6. I could write an Essay about how reactions to Ben tie into attitudes toward offenders and the criminal justice system, rehabilitation etc but... maybe another day lmao

bro how u send me all this i swear they have a character limit on asks 😭 i love it tho lemme go thru it point by point like u did

1. idk how it didn't dawn on me that the sympathy for callum coming from the gp would be bc he's a soldier... like idk how that didn't occur to me.... even when that other anon talked abt the acceptable face of ptsd i thought yeah people know ptsd mainly bc of soldiers but like... idk i just Forgot how a certain demographic of ppl who consider soliders and police the Pinnacle of humanity so ofc they'd be sympathetic and understanding..... idk HOW i didn't think of that but thank you for bringing that up to me omg

2. it's actually crazy that u bring that up bc me and vikki @permetstu were just talking abt this the other day bc i was surprised at how many overlapping symptoms there are between bpd and ptsd and so i googled it and found that actually bpd and cptsd are pretty commonly confused as each other BECAUSE of the overlap in symptoms !!!! but you're dead on, they can and often do co-occur bc both ptsd and bpd are rooted in trauma. i personally still would lean towards bpd for ben over cptsd bc of his abandonment issues which seem (from a quick google tbf so it's not like im an expert lmao) to occur in bpd but not in cptsd. but like i said im not an expert and they can co-exist !! i just think it's very interesting how other ppl are spotting the same things and talking abt a diagnosis that is so commonly misdiagnosed as bpd and vice versa. like at least i know im not imagining it lmao !!!

3 + 4. sadly i think you're right lmao that's exactly what i meant when i was talking abt there being an outcry if there was ever to be a bpd diagnosis for ben bc he's 'bad rep' bc of the things he's done. in that post i was talking abt bpd exclusively but you could apply that to any mental illness and you'd get ppl saying that they're excusing his behaviour instead of explaining it. ppl don't want explanations for someone's 'bad' i.e. outward behaviour/actions, not in characters and not in real life. ppl are more sympathetic to ppl who internalize their symptoms and/or have symptoms that don't really affect others, and i think that's another reason why ppl sympathise w callum more. i think it just comes down to ppl not wanting to understand the complexities of mental illness bc it's just easier to pass those behaviours off as personal issues/failure, someone's personality, someone being 'bad' etc etc u know? whereas something like ptsd fits a lot nicer into a box. for an outsider, it's less complicated, esp in someone like callum. callum saw/experienced bad things in the army, now he has this trigger that makes him act out a little bit. if you look at it in it's barest terms, it's a very defined cause and effect that is easy to understand. obviously it's not that simple, but that's how ppl view it. most mental illnesses don't have that very clear cause and effect, and therefore it's, for some reason, incredibly hard for ppl to wrap their head around. even if you were to say ben had ptsd too, it'd still be difficult for ppl bc what he's been thru 'isn't as bad' as what callum has, so what do you mean he's traumatised ?? like honestly there is a problem with how we all collectively view trauma. even when i first started having counselling and ppl were tellind me 'this thing traumatised u' i'm like ??? that's not Trauma tho. but trauma doesn't have to mean something horrific or violent. there is no threshold for trauma and it hurts all of us to have one. if smth fuck u up, it fucked u up. just bc u weren't in a warzone or physically abused in some way doesn't mean you can't still be traumatised, and i think that's a difficult pill for ppl to swallow.

5. when i said that i didn't mean to compare their storylines, i just kind of meant look at the reactions (both on screen and off) to callum's symptoms vs ben's vs isaac's. they're all mentally ill (as far as i'm concerned lmao) but you've got someone who's very easily sympathised with vs someone who is unsympathetic bc of his behaviour vs someone who is unsympathetic bc they're 'scary' or 'crazy'. it comes back the same issues of how obvious is the cause and effect and how sympathetic are their symptoms. but yeah, i agree isaac's sl is completely different for all the reasons you said but also the conversation of (mis)diagnosis in poc for these types of things and also medicating these types of illnesses but that's a whole other conversation but yh lmao i was purely just comparing different reactions to different illnesses and presentations of those illnesses, that's all !

6. i do not know enough abt this particular topic to have an Opinion but i do know enough to know you're right and that you for bringing this up to me bc it will def be smth for me to consider moving forward !!!

💞💞💞

#anon #question #lmk if anyone needs anything tagged for this one bc im not sure