#im like calm but i feel weird

[ganondoodle]

im kinda glad i was a tiny child when windwaker came out and i only played it years later without having internet access for the longest time bc i would have NOT survived the hatred i know ww got when it first came out bc it wasnt what most people expected (ww is my fav zelda)

loving botw but not liking totk and seeing the vast majority praise the latter like its the holy grail while alot also discrediting and needlessly hating on botw for it is already making it hard to stay calm about :U

#ganondoodles talks #special interest go brrrr #sucks when you care so much about a piece of media thats out of your control and it does something you hate #i do not control the hyperfixation #it wouldnt be so bad if people wouldnt keep hating on botw just to praise totk more tbh #and before people say but arent YOU doing the same thing in reverse??? #welll ... its suppposedly a sequel yes? #direct sequels should build on the first title and totk does the opposite doesnt it? #again one of my biggest problems is that it was advertised and called a direct sequel qhen it really isnt #like at all #how some characters also made a weird turn in their personality it really does feel like it did a majoras mask thing without admitting to i #like majoras is GOOD #it was weird and kinda nonsensical but ultimately worked #can you imagine if totk just went with the whole other dimension thing properly and really went ham with it- #.... i am coming up with even more ideas for totk rewritten arent it.. #anyway i dont think im gonna get a collectors edition ever again given the risk of me not liking what its for #regret spending that kind of money on it after i calmed down my fears and in the end they turned out to be mostly right #;__;

[skunkes]

blood test tomorrow and i dont think theyll let someone in with me so nobody's going to hold me down, making me feel Calm and also preventing me from escaping. smile.

#talkys #IM SCAREEDDDD #ive gotten a bit used to needles after all the covid shots but idk. #the Blood Draw Location is an entirely different beast #ykwim. vaccine injections are ok bc its the shoulder its so Secure #middle of arm feels so flimsy and frail. scared #qnd its not even ever all that bad (at least vaccines bc ive only gotten blood drawn once) #but i get sooooo anxious and then the waiting and the pulling out feels so horrendous too. #like the last covid vaccine i got wasnt bad at all! but i feel it lingered too long and i wanted to jump out of my skin. #rambling now but i annoy medical professionals bc for some reason whenever Anything happens to me #(not just injections bc its happened at the ENT too) my legs always want to fly straight up into the air #(or just Straight if im sitting) #its the equivalent of tensing another part of the body to stay calm for me idk why....weird security... #but i always get yelled at LOL like sorry i dont even do it consciously....im Scared....

[flovoid]

new beginning while being all alone and seventeen…

luckily enough for Ekko he found a an empty shell to live in, but he still needs to pay for bills or he might be kicked out… (welp at least there is no mold in his apartment-)

poor Ekko already having nowhere to shave but in the public restroom (idk what is wrong w his bathroom but rip bro) + also why his facial hair grows FAST…

also nice slippers Ekko hehe definitely I didn’t screamed when I saw THOSES patterns in cas

#sour legacy challenge #*ekko #*slc0 #sims 4 #ts4 #simblr #my sims #sims 4 legacy #sims 4 gameplay #a calm beginning ngl i might not like itbut we well see if i will finish this gen or nah lmao #its so weird to me because everytime i play a household i always have things planned for #now this feels weird cuz I didn’t planned anything im just doing a challenge and idk maybe its just me but starting over always feels… #empty. yk

[seariii]

:0

#the sudden silence after the storm and the feeling fear starting to raise up #'am I being annoying?' #'we were all messing around... and i repeatedly asked for confirmation... so it has to be okay right?' #'but what if im truly just annoying others...' #'but what if...' ... my stomach is starting to hurt... #... sigh.... its okay seari. its late you are tired and the days have been a bit weird-feeling lately #she knows its a joke and she was laughing too. maybe just make sure she is still okay with it in the morning #come on lets calm down. spam like a couple mutuals and burry this post so its slightly more difficult to come across #seari talks #might erase

[mikodaiyo]

I saw everyone else drawing a full moon & wanted to join!

#sesskag #sesshomaru #kagome #sesshomaru x kagome #inuyasha #my art #ok ANYWAY #I was very excited to do the pantssssss i love this denim palette+brush its so fun #and less daunting to draw clothes! well modern clothes #I liked playing with brushes on this! I loosened my wrist and let it do what it wanted to kagome's hair #and I actually like ittt I have to remind myself hair is not just a dead thing on your head 💀 on my hairspray shit😆 #I just needed to play and loosen up and focus on something elseeee anything else 😩 sesskag is nice its calming #I actually like looking at this omg I'm like next time i feel like going all out #I'm going to reference this photo because there are thingsssss #i wanted kagome's hair to pop more since its kinda the main feature AND I think I accomplished that #I could render it more but...nnnahhhh nah that's my too much gene trying to get out #Im gonna recharge and render the hair even better next time #and sess' hair fringe/bangs are getting harder and easier its weird #yoart

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#sorry im thinking abt death again #because it's weird to think that ive been in the room. maybe a meter away from someone as they died #that someone being my mom. its just weird. the time in the hospital feels like it happened in some dark little pocket universe detached from #time. a calm room and then the soft blips of a monitor then the nurse rushing in to say she'd passed #i dont kno y ppl use that phrase: passed on. i mean i do. it softens the topic. makes it sound peaceful. ive yet to use it. i just say she #died bc thats what happened. is that insensitive? i dunno. when i was home i realized that i come off as much stranger than i think. the way #my family see me doesnt fit how i see myself. i dont kno what to do with that. i dunno. theyre all together today #for an early easter. and im halfway across the country again. nose so stuffy ive had to mouth breathe for the last 3 days #and again. everything feels the same as it did before but also profoundly different. sometimes i cry in the mornings. or when i think abt #future vacations she wont be there for. bc in the end she quickly slipped away in a way that couldn't be described as peaceful until her #last half a day. and all i can think about in that tiny room is how scary it would be to lose control like that #and how its not fair and she didnt deserve to die only halfway through a lifetime. but its not about fair and its not about deserving. #sometimes bad things just happen. that's life. and now i own a book called motherless daughters. and now im standing with the countless #others who've lost their moms too early. ive already become aware of 3 ppl in my daily life who are in the same club #i keep thinking about this moment that happened between my parents at the hospital. apparently my dad was helping her get cleaned up and her #stomach was so bloated she looked like she had a bby in there. which my dad said. and my mom apparently said: but it's a baby no one want. i #dont kno y that upsets me so much. all the things i heard abt her being in the hospital before i got there upset me. and the rest of my #family was there to see it. so i have the least traumatic version of the story. and i got almost 27 years with her. except my sisters #probably got more time with her bc i spent so much time away. or maybe not. i dunno. #i dunno. im just sad that shes gone and sad that it was drawn out even a little bit. 6 days isnt long but im sure it felt like an eternity. #again not fair. nothings fair. 53 years of unfairness culminating in a tragedy. she would hate me characterizing it like that. she lived a #full life as they say. full with an asterisk on account of length #unrelated

[infizero]

ok after listening to the english version of the death note musical....... unpopular opinion i think but i actually prefer the japanese version? dont get me wrong, with some of the songs i do think i might like the eng version more but..... idk i like the lyrics of the japanese version a lot more? and obviously i only know them via a translation but i know for a fact that the entire focus of certain songs are different between versions.

like in the english version of the game begins, L is talking about his strategy to track down kira. but in the japanese version, he's more so talking TO kira directly and saying that he's going to take him down from his "god" status to hell. or mortals and fools, which had a wholeee different vibe in the japanese version being called like a cruel dream. and uhhhh am i insane or was rem's song before she dies an entirely different song? cause in english it was like a sort of generic love song that was pretty chill considering the context, while in the japanese version it was this superrr melancholic and striking ballad she sang while floating around misa.

idk but i really do think i prefer the japanese version. but the og english version is good too!!! i really liked hurricane and the way it ends in particular

#in ''the way it ends'' btw light saying to L ''i've always stayed a step ahead; but you were with me all the way'' almost made me cry WHATTT #WHO MADE HIM FUCKING SAY THATTTTT THATS SUCH AN INSANE LYRIC #but anyway yeah i think i prefer the jp version a good amount #another thing was um. and this might be a stupid thing to be weird about but. L's actor was too passionate for my tastes #<- that sounds insane but if you know anime L you know what i mean right. like hes pretty reserved #and i felt in the japanese production i watched L's actor there was still a great performer and singer like putting work into those songs #while still keeping that air of L being more reserved and like. flat almost? i feel like the guy playing L in the eng version was too much #like ''im BELTTTINGGGGGG HOW IM GONNA FUCKING CATCCHHHH KIRA!!!!!!!!!!'' like bro calm down...... #ITS A GOOD PERFORMANCE it just doesnt read as L to me. and like thats fine whatever its an adaptation #but also in the japanese version they still did that adaptation while making L feel more like himself. so idk man #but anyway I WANNA SEE THIS NEW LONDON PRODUCTION SOOOOOOOO BAD #IVE SEEN PHOTOS AND IT LOOKS SO GOOD THE SET IS SOOOOOO COOL LOOKING OML #i need to see this musical live at SOME point in my life. pleaseeee can we get a north america production after this #serena.txt #death note posting

[guckies]

Been seeing all the discussion about Tubbo being Em’s parents and…. 😬

It’s like we get a girl egg with all moms and it’s now feels like people are saying “she needs a dad!!” because a male is treating her like family…

I’m all for Tubbo being family to Empanada but being her dad?? It feels a lot like there are some misogynistic undertones there. Like family is not just parents it can be literally anything, same way Pepito has Foolish being grandma. Tubbo can have the same and be family in some way to Em.

But it’s like we have an all girl family but because the egg is interacting with others, people are inserting the males into it(the parent dynamic). Which just reads wrong when a majority of the island is male relationships and prominent male families where the girls are mainly just aunts to the children.

Have your headcannons but don’t try to insert them into the canon with your posts especially when a majority of the server relationships are male prominent.

#qsmp neg #qsmp discourse #just can we not have something for the girls?? also it feels even more weird when you do say that and people say well Tubbo’s gay anyway- #which how does that have anything to do with it??? like all for being strong family as in tio or smth like that #but pushing the hc of a gay dad in an all girl family feels like it has undertones i dont want to unpack rn #im not going to stop yall from having your headcanons but like take a step back and look at what the situation is and then think #also this literally happened when jaiden and roier were treating tilin and flippa like their children some people weren’t happy but not - #many weren’t watching multiple streams at the time so they’re wasn’t many complaining but its happened before #also happened a bit when bagi became richas mom #the only difference with those relationships where that the eggs choose and agreeds for them to be their parents #also it’s like yes we would love to see her parents log in more but literally they are all busy people and weren’t always incredibly active- #on the server apart from bagi which is smth the admins probably should have thought about if the new eggs were going to be taken care of #yes let em have her family and her lore but also let us have our female mums rep bc there is so little of it in qsmp #but calm down about em lore bc yall think its the most important thing out there when a whole losd of the eggs rarely have lore esp old eggs

[soldier-poet-king]

hanging out with A Creachure*

*catsitting my friend's middle aged BEAST who i am *definitely not* allergic to

#the duality of fran #it's ok it's already ragweed season so im already poppin that allegra d 2x a day anyway #as long as i keep my pillow clear of cat fur and my healing tattoo covered it'll be alright #he is. so fat. and chill\ #just wants tummy rubs and lots of snacks and to sit with the balcony door open #gotta love that downtown smog i guess???? #im all settled and he has calmed as well #but now i gotta like. go get groceries #im SLEEBY and have a mild headache tho #there's a sbucks across the street. i can have a fancy coffee???? as a treat???? #ughh groceries requires meal planning for the next week and im in an unfamiliar kitchen idk what basics she has #will have to go digging. which she told me to do! i still feel weird doing it???? #my fave used bookstore is also less than 10 min walk away #and a bunch of thrift stores are maybe 15 min walk #tmrw after mass. oh u KNOW what im going to do

[katyobsesses]

I think my glee obsession is returning in full force

#this is a nice feeling #i didnt have gleecast anywhere on my Spotify wrapped last year for the first time in... years!!! #but here i am listening to all the songs on repeat most of today #and reading glee fic #and looking at my currently abandoned fics #and having Thoughts™️ and headcanons and just... #special interest obsession shit #its calming and happy and sksgxkdk #also my reading brain is back which is SUCH a relief! #its been like 3 months of only being able to read a book in audiobook form #like my sister write this whol prophecy for our dnd campaign and i could not for the life of me understand it not matter how hard i tried #but last session i finally clicked #and im READING A PHYSICAL BOOK TOOOOOOOO #i just feel more settled because of it its nice #i think i really didnt like the weird weather the uk was having- it being HOT AS BALLS and then freezing like the next week #and then christmas and stress over bemefits happened #but now yhats mostly set... i think.. ish... its still confusing and scary #but ay least i have words i can read to escape it #katy liveblogs life #i am using tumblr like a diary rn ignore me 😂

[mystrothedefender]

I accidentally blocked someone and I went to unblock them but they're acting so weird about it it's kinda unnerving and I might keep them blocked for a bit 😬

#i feel mean for it but um.... calm down maybe please #i feel like maybe they're a child and they don't know how to deal with situations like this yet #which is fine its part of growing up but like #im a 32 year old man i don't want a child being weird about me #now i know how dan and phil feel!!!! (i am joking)

[skrunksthatwunk]

babycat's favorite toys

laser pointer (missing, assumed dead)

stray q-tip

halls cough drop in the wrapper

purple ball circle chamber (deceased, no balls(?? where did they go))

jingle ball (deceased, kicked in twain by my powerful sexylegs)

#idk if ive made a post like this before but it's very funny to me #he's been bored-groaning at me and doing zoomies and stuff and i accidentally kicked the jingle ball in twain #and he likes the halves a little cuz they spin weird but it wasnt enough for him so to stop him from hurting himself by running around and #jumping at the window so he could punch the blinds etc etc i stole one of my roommate's q tips #because he didnt wanna play with any of the other toys #and it worked. he is now calm. my ipad baby is now content god bless #im just glad i didnt have to bust out the cough drop. i feel like that wouldve been harder to explain

[coolcoelacanth]

it's been almost a week since i stopped talking to my friends over text in our gc, and it has been way better. no more will i have to feel rejection multiple times a day, or feel like i will never be good enough for anyone to even listen to for a second

#personal #well not rlly friends #ill call them my school friends lol #seriously tho fuck people that call you their friends then treat you like a burden for daring to talk to them #im not wasting anymore energy on people who refuse to meet the bare minimum #its rlly not that hard to care about people #except maybe if you lack empathy which they seem to #im done feeling like a loser by the people who are supposed to lift me up #ive done that way too many times in my life #thx mom for setting me up for failure #but theyre shady as hell fr like wtf #ive never met a stranger group of people #theyre so obsessed with upholding this weird social hierarchy #and im like girl its just us calm down #mostly just one of them i got the most beef with #shes actually an asshole fr #like frfr #theyre all rude anyway

[quietwingsinthesky]

Tossing 🙉 back at u :3 (also 🤝)

How do they react to silence?

I think, from what I've seen of spaceships on good old doccy who, they are never quiet. Not just TARDISes (though Even would love that they are so. well. expressive.) space travel is just noisy in an ambient hum sort of way. A noisy ship is a good ship, a functional ship. A silent ship is bad. The only silent part of space travel is space.

And that's why Even would get so anxious if things were fully quiet around them. With their feet firmly on the ground, they'd get nervous if they couldn't hear anything. It's like a background check constantly running: Can I Hear Things Working: IF yes -> everything is fine. IF no -> we are all about to die.

How do they react to being touched by another person?

very dependent on the person! touch-starved even real and true, but touch-anxious(?) even! also very real! you must approach them like they are a spooked horse and you are the last horsegirl on the ranch who needs them to win the big horse race. treats are very helpful in this regard.

In all seriousness, it's all about trust. Once that's established, Even is. I hesitate to say cuddly. It's more like, they do not understand personal space, do not want to understand personal space, and will insinuate themself into whatever position puts them in the most contact with the person they want to touch. (And very appreciative of things that act as an extension of touch when it can't be supplied, such as getting to wear the Doctor's coat.) They warm up to Jack extremely quick because he's just Like That about casual physical touch, and they enjoy it very much. Once they've befriended Donna, they want to be holding her hand or leaning against her whenever she's nearby. Their first time round with the Doctor, they are constantly reaching for him or returning his touch, easily and happily.

And the second time round, they. aren't. They're skittish about letting him touch them, and they only allow it if they can initiate it and end it on their terms. Even then, it's never going to be an easy thing again, but it isn't unwanted. It will never be unwanted.

And then the Master is. at a certain point, and a lot of boundaries drawn, crossed, redrawn, crossed again, and then forgotten altogether on both sides, and way too much time spent in each other's pockets, it ends up that Even doesn't really register the Master touching them as another person touching them. or. maybe it'd be more accurate to say that the Master touching them doesn't feel to them like the Master touching someone else. That it's more akin to someone touching an object they own to make sure it's still there, or even scratching their own arm to make sure they can feel it. And in turn, Even has even fewer boundaries with them then they managed to develop for other people.

#they are deeply weird about each they really are #even will stick their hands under the master's clothes to put them against her skin. and the master will just let that happen at this point #and likewise even will just. let them put them in threatening positions. a hand on their throat or holding their arm in a position where #it would be easy to break it. and even will just stand there as she does. weirdly calm about it. #asakdljaljd sorry wait thought about the doctor and missy having an almost civil conversation that's interrupted by even sticking #their hand up missy's skirt to find her thigh. like. extremely casually. and when they're satisfied they get bored and move away again #the doctor is going 0-0 while missy doesn't react because this is just one of their weird little rituals. #missy will drag even over by the arm if he feels like it and start petting them like his own personal stim toy. and even will use missy to #seek out skin-to-skin contact if they think they need it because missy is there and available. #anyway. i should really be more focused here. #but im not so im going to keep rambling. this extends to the watch too. Tentoo's watch that Even keeps that the Doctor trusted them with. #that they will not let. anyone else. touch. or *see* most of the time. but the master is the main exception to that. #because she will just reach out and hold it and Even will let her. #deeply deeply weird about each other and the doctor's relationships to each other. #dw oc #ask

[kathrynmjaneway]

.

#the way that ive known my boyfriend not even for two whole months and weve been officially together for a month only #but ive already been invited to two weddings and a birthday party #its wild to me #and its also sooooo so nice #bc all his friends are genuinely so happy for him #and everyone ive met so far has been so nice and welcoming and open to me #and like i havent even met the guy who invited me along to the birthday party #also just in general. #life is really really good right now #like i finally feel like im finding some inner peace and have the time and space to calm down and just live life #the past 5ish years have been hell and so stressfull and anxious and full of isolation and panic and one prolonged crisis that were all #the final exams of my 8 1/2 years of lawschool and becoming a lawyer #and now its all just. Good. #and he is a big part of it #he showed up just at the right time #and its weird to be all like that after A Months #but its a if you know you know kinda thing #And i know he feels the same #because he keeps telling me how he feels and thats how he feels and aaaahhh #im all mushy about this #i wont see him for 4 whole days bc im gone for a long weekend and thats actually the longest amount of days we havent seen each other #since our first date #it was 3 whole days between date 1 and 2 #and i dont think we even had that again since then #personal #i am genuinely so happy and in peace and its just the nicest feeling #okay anyway thanks for tuning in #bye

[mainfaggot]

I was so anxious today even tho i was on top of my self care slash mental well being basics check-list... I suspect it was the caffeine on top of already worsening anxious Symptoms

#it was def that combo bc i did everything else right #i was weirdly calm for the first 15 mins of my commute this morning and then it was all downhill from there fr #i got so self conscious and anxious after that and then in class i stuttered twice and seemed so unsure of myself even though i was #otherwise communicating quite coherently and fluidly #and then after class at the coffee shop where i attended my online lecture i was so on edge #i think the matcha latte just added onto the shot of espresso for the worse #which is strange because thats really not a lot of caffeine? i literally had two shots of espresso the other day and got really hyper but i #didnt want to die about it or cry about it #so yeah ^_^ its probs bc the past two days have been rough so it snowballed #also i had a weird moment on my commute home #i was so nostalgic bc it was all warm and rainy and the sky was a warm grey #but then i was so melancholy i wanted to cry #and i swear in that moment i felt like something earth shattering was happening to me because i was so refreshed by the memories of a past #self but it all felt so strangely tragic. i didn't just feel happy. i felt happy and then distraught #and i probably looked like a fool because i cant control my facial expressions as well as i used to be able to #i feel like im being dramatic again but 乁⁠(⁠ ⁠•⁠_⁠•⁠ ⁠)⁠ㄏ i have the mind of a poet or whatever the hell they say #i dont think they say that #z.post