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thegnomelord · 3 months

Note

Shark

- 🦈

(Brainrot time! Blame dougielovelove for their new work. Had a bit of a bad day and i usually dont write spicy things

This one can be set in monster au. Readers a captain of a whole different task force meant for oceanic endevours. Im talkin the readers a shark hybird (biased) their lieutenant a whale hybird, sergent an orca or a pufferfish, their newest recurits a fuckin salmon, the works.

They're close knit, heck even poly if you want. Price and the Reader meet through connections with Laswell. They find out they hav the same target, price is stubborn and wont drop the mission, despite how most of his team is not suited for water.

Reader respects it and they work really well together. A bit too well, even to the point theyre considering merging the teams.

Completely honest, Price is starting to fall for their fellow captain. I mean how can you not, they've swooped in and saved them countless times, preventing the oceans waters from completely swallowing them in the dark abyss.

Not to mention his sergents and lieutenant are just the cutest, so eager to do well and work together with his own. Just protective instincts, hit him to the point hes pickin everyone up and scentin them. They're his hoard now.

Reader and Price are settleing paper work in his office. Readers busy writing down important information and signing off reports, but price cant help but stare. How swift his hands move as each words is made and written, how tight his claws grip the pen with every small minisucle flick of the pen.

He hiccups a small flame when their fellow captain decided to extravagantly spin his pen when he trys to recall the missing info. How smooth it moves between his blackened fingers, swirling and turning flipping all between nimble and flexible rough- and hes hard.

Reader realizes Price is distracted, before he can call out their name, he glances down just to see whats got him so wrapped up in his mind.

Now all i can think about is Reader forcing Price to focus and finish his paperwork while hes got both his assets shoved up his ass. Price is just a mess, making his paperwork a completely unusable. Yet, the reader still wants him to finish, becuase if he dosent Price definitely wont.

Or they decide to have some fun, release the pent up desire the poor dragons been keeping buried. A soilder be it 141 or be from the readers own team, walks in. Can't help but love how the stoic draconic captain looks so small and pathetic under his co-leader. Joining in on the fun just to see how wrecked this great leader can get.)

Okay, this is cool and my horny is up but I made a few changes as I like characters to be more mythological and just animal hybrids, though those are cool too

CW:NSFW, quick and rough, subbot Price, Gaz, Oc sergeant, domtop reader

Price loves you. But you are one cruel bastard.

Those big rough hands of yours trace his taught belly, webbed fingers making a shiver crawl up his spine and stealing what little thoughts are left in his head as one of your hands trails down the smooth scales of his tail. "Come on dear captain, just a few more pages to go." You purr, chest rumbling against his back like the thrum of an engine, your lips tickling his pointy earlobe.

Price swears he's going to die; pants around his ankles and legs spread, stretched so wide on both of your shafts he can feel your heartbeat by the way your cocks twitch against his walls, each labored breath making his hole clench down desperately, his own hard cocks left hard and unattended.

It would be one thing if you claimed him like he wants you to, pushed him flat on the desk and fucked into him like he's nothing but a bitch to pump full of your cum.

But you don't. You just sitting inside him, hard and throbbing and still despite how much he tries to tempt you by clenching down. Price finds himself cursing the amount of patience you have.

"Sweetheart," He groans, voice too light and whiny for his own ears, head thrown back to give you a heatless glare. "C'mon, don't tease me." Price tries to grind his hips down but you hold him firm.

"Not until you finish those reports." You grunt, authoritative, and Price is stuck between wanting to bite you in revenge and trying to stifle a pathetic whine. "Go on, you only have a few pages left."

Those damn reports. Price can barely read his own handwriting, a light tremor in his fingers from the way your cocks press against his prostate. "Cruel bastard." He growls, sucking in a breath and clenching around you.

His chest flares with pride the second your claws dig into his body, not even your mind able to hold back the animalistic need to buck into the tight willing heat surrounding you. But it's a double edged sword — a hiccup of flame sparks from his mouth, your cockheads bumping his prostate and making a bead of precum spurt from his cocks.

"As if you're any better." You growl in his ear, your hair tickling his skin as you roughly nip at his though hide, pleasure and pain loosing their borders in his mind.

He doesn't notice the nicking on the door, but Price is ready for hell to swallow up when he finally registers the door open, his blue eyes rising to meet Sullivan — your hippocampus sergeant — who looks just as mortified to walk in on you like that as Price.

Sullivan's dark horse ears flicker back, the iridescent scales along his cheeks turning from ocean green to a vibrant embarrassed pink, "I- is this, this a- I can leave if, if, if- this looks like a-" The poor man stumbles over his words, eyes bouncing between Price's debauched form and your amused face.

It gets worse when Gaz pokes his head in behind Sullivan, "Hey captains are you-" His jaw falls, pupils dilating like he's a crow that just saw a shinny penny. "-oh."

You just chuckle, rough voice putting Sullivan at ease. "At ease boys," You snort, don't even attempt to hide anything, one hand sliding down to stroke his cock, so slick with his precum that his shaft slides through your hand just from you squeezing it. "Need something boys?"

Even from here Price can see the way Sullivan's eyes darken as well at the deep moan that tumbles out of Price's throat and Price has to bite his lip to keep the noises in check.

"I-" Sullivan sucks in a breath, scales slowly turning to the shade of an overcooked lobster. "I. . . I forgot."

"Can we join?" Gaz asks, chuckling at Sullivan's wide-eyed look. "What? As you weren't thinking it." He shrugs and places a kiss on his cheek when Sully nods meekly.

"I don't know." You hum, letting go of Price's cock to tilt his head to you, meeting his eyes. "Do you want your boys to help you keep focused?"

Price swallows, knows that all that awaits him should he accept would be pleasurable torture, but his bones burn with the need to have his hoard close to him, taking care of him for a change. "Yeah," He growls, less whiny and more demanding.

You hum and roll the chair back to create space for the two men beneath the table, "On your knees." You don't miss the way the authority in your voice makes both men shiver.

"You heard him," Gaz grins and pulls Sullivan towards you two by the hand, reminding you more of a puppy than any harpy as he happily gets on his knees.

Your gaze skirts to Sullivan as he tentatively settles on Gaz's right, pitch black eyes hidden behind that fringe you keep telling him to cut. "You alright with this Sully?" You ask, knowing the man's sexual experience is limited to one girlfriend and your team, and even then he's shy about many acts. "You don't need to do something you're unsure about. No one is going to be mad."

"I, yes. I want this." He swallows, looking back at you. "I, uh. . . I got some pointers." He says shily.

Gaz just snickers and throws his arm over Sullivan's shoulder. "I helped," He says proudly, wing spreading out to wrap around Sully's back.

"Rubbing off on my sergeant already huh?" You snort, your attention turning to Price when he growls, capturing his lips in a kiss to placate his demanding draconic side while your hand lets go of his cocks — an open offering to the two sergeants.

"Only in a good way." Gaz grins and leans in, opening his mouth and pink little tongue lolling out to lick at one leaking cock like he knows Price likes, lips wrapping around the tapered head and sucking on it, amusement bubbling in his chest when you hold Price's hips firm so he can't buck up.

Sullivan follows suit, less confident but still willing, holding the other cock in his smooth scalled hand and tentatively giving the crown a kiss, dark eyes watching both of your reactions as he slowly trails kisses around the cumhole, growing bolder with every small whimper until he's gently suckling on the tip like Gaz had done.

"You're doing good Sully," You praise, even your voice is hoarse from the way Price squeezes down on you now that the two sergeants are servicing his cocks. "You too Gaz." You reach down to gently pet his hair so Kyle doesn't feel left out, "Both of you, so good for me and Price."

Price, for his sake, may as well be a mindless animal from the way his brain is steadily melting out of his cocks like a lit candle, moaning low in his throat, his eyes closed to just feel the pleasure that's assaulting him on both ends. He can tell the difference between Gaz's and Sullivan's mouths, the duality of firm swipes of the tongue across his shaft and the kitten licks on his most sensitive parts making his head swim, hips trying uselessly to fuck into the hot mouths and your own cocks.

He whines when you grip his hips firmly. "No," You snort, both arms keeping his hips still so he can do nothing but endure. "You're not getting off until the job's finished."

Price shivers, "Bastard." He growls weakly, his eyesight blurry as he tries to focus on the document.

"Pot, kettle." You grin against his skin, helping guide his arm towards the documents where he left off. "C'mon, it's just a few pages, then your sergeants will be able to reward you fully."

#gnome correspondence #cod mw2 #x reader #male reader #top male reader #captain john price #kyle gaz garrick #oc #captain john price x male reader #captain john price x reader #captain john price x oc #kyle gaz garrick x male reader #kyle gaz garrick x reader #cod mwii #cod modern warfare #cod smut #monster 141 au #monster cod au #monster 141

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thatdeadaquarius · 1 year

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Reader that can emit sounds from their memory(like as an aura)

Walk into a room? Why do I hear boss music

Comedic timing? Fuck yeah.

Bored? Jumpscare noise.

Zhongli talking? Jeopardy theme.

Someone is annoying? Earrape.

Think about it!

Hello! I’m the 12th Harbinger, aka as CHIL- bitch shut the fuck up, WHATS UP ITS YA BOY AQUARIUSSS- /ref

lmao imagine you walking into a room like this in teyvat, with like that audio I SAVE BY GIVING IT CPR- TIGHT AS VIRGIN BOY DONT GET NERVOUS-

(also ill stop apologizing for the late replies to these, bc as we all know by now that im slow and u will get answered eventually i promise tumblr most likely didnt delete u guys asks im just hoarding them LMAO)

I’ve been super busy running in circles so sorry about ghosting! I still very much enjoy and love u guys and love seeing you guys enjoy my stuff :’)

Still cant believe that, but thank you!

JEOPARDY THEME MUSIC WHEN ZHONGLI TALKS

HE’D BE SO CONFUSED

THINKIN HE GOT AN ANCIENT CURSE HE DOESNT KNOW ABT PUT ON HIM OR SMTH BC HE’S ALWAYS BEING STALKED BY THIS SONG-

(tbh unless the person is super observant I dont think most ppl would get that it’s YOU causing this chaos lmao)

◇

Like I can see Zhongli eventually getting it lol, other ppl I could see after the first few weeks of interacting with you (esp bc you mix it up, honestly it was only bc u kept playing the jeopardy theme over and over when Zhongli ranted on too long that he got it was you 💀):

Heizou (he’s the best detective on all of Inazuma’s islands, ofc he got it! no he will not acknowledge that he totally thought you were hiding a very musical tanuki somewhere on your person at all times lol)

◇

Alhaitham and Cyno (haitham took like, two hours of walking around town with you and knew, bc he’s a little know-it-all lazy bastard like that, and Cyno is actually just really aware, despite what most ppl think, he’s the General Mahamatra and not just a regular Mahamatra for a reason after all)

◇

Tighnari (i stg he can like, smell when bullshittery is happening in his vicinity …or... hear?)

◇

Venti (unsurpringly, he’s totally in love with this power of yours, i mean he definitely loves you cares about you a lot he says, but you’re starting to think he’s just lying to butter you up into pranking Diluc, Barbara, Jean, and really the entirety of Mondstadt more often including Zhongli just so he can laugh until he’s on the ground again, also he definitely once asked you to make a dragon sound that’s the equivalent of shouting FUCK at Dvalin when he was flying overhead one day)

◇

Hmm

Hm hm hmmmm

Who elseee, i need a characcctterrr lisstttt…

Albedo (duh, he’s albedo, you think he has an entirely too thick folder dedicated to your recent obsessions, you rant a lot about it while playing and also he can access your browsing history 👀, and he somehow doesn't know that about you?? You’re like, literally one of his long-term, there-for-life, has-bought-a-house-for-free-in-his-head-you- arent-even-on-rent-anymore, hyperfixations or special interests. Autistic!Albedo is autistic, Because I Am Your God, And I Say It Is So.)

◇

Dehya (always knows when its you walking around near her bc you like to listen to your old world’s songs too often when you arent pranking bitches, she actually rlly likes it and your music tastes…)

☆

HOLY FUCK SPEED RUN BC GOD THERE’S TOO MANY BITCHES WANNA BE YOUR BABY, RIDING AROUND IN A DAMN MERCEDES-

OKAY-

SO not all in the same way or at the same time, or even the same length of time did they realize you literally change background music or some shit so I’ll let you just- you know okay- like you get it- you get it.

Xiao, Kazuha, Kaeya, Diluc, Ayato, Yae Miko, Keqing, Qiqi, Klee, Sara, Kuki, Nahida, Ningguang, Rosaria, Scaramouche/Babygirl, Dainsleif, Kokomi, Xinyan, Yun Jin, Yelan.

Jfc got the whole damn pride flag up here

Anyway everybody else outta luck, at least takes em a month or longer to get it lol

♡

Sorry abt the end there i didnt feel like writing out all those bitches bc the few I did before were already longer than I thought they’d be…

Also, I am posting these spam of drafts (and that old follower 100+ event possession headcanons in prep for the next 2 weeks bc I will be really busy, again :/

Got spring break shenanigans this week, then I’ll be running around like a cat with zoomies bc im getting ready to install/actually submit my artworks for the gallery exhibition!

…wish me luck or prayers or anything good from any god you believe in, I need the strength.

With love, safe travels,

💀♒️

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist

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shrine-fr · 1 year

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You gotta trust me when I say im the king of not following flight rising lore. if i post anything else after this haHA. below is her lore, but the run down is:

dragons can study any element they want! when theyre born theyre monochrome and as they take interest in a subject their body changes to show that. A gathering of dragons of the same element is called a ‘flight’ but an alliance of different dragons is called a ‘study’. dragons themselves in my lore are very curious but very greedy, so they hoard knowledge and magic.

you can have two elements you can study so it works like pokemon typings. i’ll make a list of them all one day but you probably get the picture of what theyre like

dragons gatekeepy and snobby natures make it so they normally only mingle with their own flights (or they keep to themselves entirely) unless it benefits them to study with others (like a life dragon would absolutely talk to a earth dragon). the search for knowledge motivates dragons above all else, but it also makes them forget their morals.

Acacia, the Mother of Fire

For dragons, fire and destruction are not the same. The dragons that follow the school of fire often find themselves using their abilities to prune dead forests, rescue ice-trapped critters and cook food for their friends.

But it wasn’t always like this.

During the mess of the dark ages, dragons who chose to research fire were thought of as selfish arsonists, chasing their curiosity no matter the cost. Farm lands would be torched just to smell the burn, entire forests levelled to make a cosy nest, and hoards melted to solid gold right in front of their owners eyes. The path of fire was the path of destruction.

Other schools of dragons banded together to protect the land and fight off these bitches, leading to......a war. As it progressed, the fire dragons became more and more beastly, willingly corrupting themselves into charred monsters to better fight off their dragon kin. Their worst crime was influencing their eggs, making it so all their hatchlings would hatch into super charged fire dragons, unable to study any element other than fire.

The fire dragons were lead by the Flame Warden, and Acacia was his wife. Though corrupted by her husbands magic, the Good Guys tm saw that she wasn’t as battle brained as her flight. So they shoved her under their arm and bundled her off. they got rid of her corruption and with her help they took down her husband who is now, maybe trapped in stone? i dont know <3 hi

Acacia has been a mother to all the orphaned hatchlings left from that time, warming the eggs herself with her huge fluffy body. Her tail got burnt off in the fight with her ex, and her secondary study is life.

The fire dragons have claimed the Flame Wardens castle as their central academy, and its basically a huge basin with volcanos in the mountains and a big meadow. in the time since the fight, the land has healed.

Acacia hasn’t been accepted as the new queen that easily though. With her rule came a ban on destruction magic, with her labelling it forbidden. This means dragons that have dedicated their lives to that knowledge would have to stop using it completely, betraying all the work they’ve done. Through the years of the war the magic of the Flame Wardens high command morphed from Fire into something of its own, deep and corrupted.. But still magic. It cannot be unlearned, and this decision has caused a split in her flight.

but its fine shes so flufyf.

#dragons #lore #not fr #but like.. kinda ? no not fr. i mean its a gaoler and i'll play the game more but

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deepdarkconsumption · 3 months

Text

★BE A BOSS: OBJECTIVE COMPLETED

General Content Warning for: Violence, blood, guns, knives, smoking, drugs, alcohol, wounds, fire, possible body horror, etc.

Just another kin bastard out here. Don't mind me. Dont worry about it lol

fyi for u 3edgy5me kids - Im an adult. fuckin. stay in ur lane and be safe bc ur only a kid once. dont make my mistakes. seriously.

➥ Myth / Wraith / some kin names work (namely Zeitgeist or Infinity) ➥ he/his or it/its ➥ 1997. so. adult. ➥ Got a memory span like a goldfish on a bad drug trip ➥ just a fuckin weird bastard tbh

other blog tags + list under the cut of who/what I was lol

Other Blog Tags

#Shit I Sent In Yo - #DeepDarkConsumption.txt

#Aes - #Art of me - #Decor - #Fashion - #Food - #Haunts - #Info - #Kinfessions - #Positivity - #Self Care - #Shit to buy - #Shitposting - #Stim - #Stimboard - #vid

My Theriotypes + Otherkin (alphabetical)

➥ Black-Billed Magpie - #magpie Having multiple 'types that had wings is a pain bc getting the feeling of astral wings doesn't HELP especially when 3 of the 4 were all feathered wings. heck-

➥ Deep Sea Monster - #dsm A bio-luminescent catfish-gator-serpent creature. Very large/long. Rarely came up to or near the surface. If I did it was at night and usually to sink passing ships or submarines. I lurked in cave deep underwater. I used to hoard stuff from sunken ships and subs.

➥ Demon - #idt Super unconventional demon here. Like not in the hellfire and brimstone sense - like the inter-dimensional traveler who liked fucking shit up and messing with others, to the point where it often resulted in disaster and death.

➥ Miniature Goat - #goat

➥ Yellow Mongoose - #mongoose I do feel a strong connection to any mongoose, however.

➥ Void - #void ohman how to explain- I was some kind of void-dweller. I can feel wings of some kind, nothing really like birds or bats or bugs, just wings? When I get anxious in a shift, I get a glitchy, staticy, spaced out feeling, in my body, in my brain, moreso than normal. It also feels very militaristic which doesn’t make sense like ??? maybe its b/c another kintype? Maybe not?

My Fictiotypes (alphabetical)

➥ Claudia Donovan - #Donovan Warehouse 13, mostly canon compliant? I think? Do NOT follow if shared. Still working out if I was in an AU or not but so far, the events of the show seem fairly accurate?? IDK man memories are a bitch tbh. Should probably rewatch it again-

➥ Cut-Out - #roughnecks Starship Troopers: Invasion, noncanon fictiotype. Do NOT follow if this exact fictiotype is shared. Mobile Infantry Soldier. Rico’s Roughneck’s platoon. Nick-name was Cut-Out. I remember I had screwed up somehow & getting my unit killed. I was the only one who survived. The war lasted about another decade afterwards. I was forced into training new recruits, despite my protests.

➥ Flametrooper - #Flametrooper Star Wars sequels, noncanon/background. Just another background flametrooper, really. All I remember is the heat of the fire, and the harsh smell of chemicals. Mostly sensory memories, nothing visual of note.

➥ Flint - #Necro Dragonfable, noncanon fictiotype Unsure on doubles, please ask. I mostly used Necromancy with some Pyromancy at times. I remember a mostly dark blue and black colour scheme and I know that damn dragon was black with deep blues. Fucked if I know anything else about it.

➥ Point Blank Member - #gm Saints Row, noncanon fictiotype. Do NOT follow if this exact fictiotype is shared. I didn’t really work with pimping and drug dealing, though I would escort others at times. I worked more in enforcement and similar. I wasn’t a gang boss, but I was sorta high up in the ranks. Rival gangs did not like me lol I was a vicious bastard :p

➥ Project M6, Codename: Infinity - #asset Marvel Cinematic Universe, noncanon fictiotype. Do NOT follow if this exact fictiotype is shared. Originally I thought M6 was just a sona but NOPE I was wrong about a kintype oops. I absolutely did not volunteer for experiments. I was kidnapped by Hydra and they ended up experimenting on me a lot, and brainwashed to the point the only identity I had was what they gave to me. I ended up being captured by SHIELD prior to CA:TWS. This whole life was a shitshow lol

Usually at least in some form of a partial kinshift for this one. Def would say this is my strongest one. Welp.

➥ Zeitgeist - #Acid boy Deadpool 2, mostly canon compliant? Do NOT follow if shared I don't recall how I died but I also don't recall much of the canon shown? So I think the outcome of X-Force was different than shown in the film. I was a bit of a jerk, and I know I didn't consider myself to be a nice person despite having a mostly chill yet chaotic vibe. I also remember smoking a lot, because it was the only thing that got the taste of that acid vomit out of my mouth.

#deepdarkconsumption.txt

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khaleesiofalicante · 3 years

Note

me, nodding of to sleep: IM HERE IM HERE

did my head just loll to the side? you will never know. first of all this chapter was the most beautiful thing i have ever read. Mavid have my HEART. It's also 4 16 am so im sorry if the reactions are a little bland but this was PERFECT.

me, throughout the whole thing: mavid mavid mavid

They had kissed for the first time almost a week ago. And they had kissed again. A couple of times.

Okay fine, they had kissed a lot since then.

Not a lot a lot. But a lot.

Wait a minute. How much kissing was a lot of kissing?

this is adorable

“I heard he cried when he found out Lexi and Liv were dating,” David chuckled.

yup that's jace

“We have to pay to talk on the phone?” Max asked incredulously. “I thought it was free.”

“Of course it isn’t free, Max!” David chuckled. “We have to pay for WiFi too.”

“This is ridiculous!” Max said. “Next you will say we have to pay for electricity.”

“Um, we do have to pay for electricity,” David chuckled again.

we pay for water too

but max you didnt know-

“Don’t let them guilt trip you!” Max had chastised. “They like doing chores. Let them do it. They fight demons all day and then come home and do chores. I feel like it’s their form of therapy. They need this.”

cant relate nope

“I don’t know,” Max groaned. “My family is so dramatic.”

the lightwood-banes in one sentence

THERE ARE SO MANY FEELS MY HEART CANNOT CONTAIN

“Well, too late!” Max announced. “This date is going to be the best first date in the history of first of dates.”

In retrospect, he really shouldn’t have said that.

nah its gonna be great

“Perhaps you should just take him to the New York Library. They have, uh, books.”

yes that is what they keep in libraries

OH MY GOD THE FRIEND IS ELYASS

HERE'S MY FAVORITE DEMON Y'ALL

His parents would not be pleased if they knew Max was summoning demons for relationship advice.

But they had also encouraged Max to make friends with everyone regardless of their identity. So, technically this was their fault. They gave him very mixed messages.

well-

you know i really shouldnt have laughed at the demon attack news but for some reason i did

i blame my sleep deprivation

shit i feel sick

you know maybe i shouldve just waited till the morning...

ok but the demon attack is NOT coincidental

there is something going on

“I thought dragon demons were extinct!” Max yelled over the commotion.

well-

ANJALI

“Man, fuck the orders!” Max said in frustration.

if you get hurt ill kill you

oh it's not her

well fuck

“That was an Armani, you piece of shit!” Rafael yelled at the demon. Max almost laughed.

THE AUDACITY

It really did. Dragon demons smelled like they lived inside a boys locker room.

well that's nice to know

FUCK THEY ARE TALKING NOW???

ok what is going on

“Say the thing!!!”

“I’m not saying the damn thing, you maniac!”

“Say the thing!”

Rafael groaned and raised his hands, the alliance rune lighting up.

“I’m not just a shadowhunter,” Rafael said through gritted teeth. “I’m Magnus Bane’s son.”

LMAO THEM

“Well, demons are stupid,” Max pointed out.

“Yeah, that makes sense,” Rafael said with a mouthful of food. “You are half demon after all.”

Im so sleepy i cant even react to this

but THEM I CANT-

WHERE.IS.ALEC

Max wanted to laugh. Only David would worry about another person while being injured in the infirmary.

MUST BE PROTECTED

Max nodded; his throat still dry. He couldn’t stop staring at David. At the wound. At the blood.

Also, maybe the naked chest.

AHEM

OH MY GOD JAIME IS ALIVE

we're getting lightwood-bane fluff LET ME CRY

alec...

on one hand alec smoking is fucking hot BUT WITH THE MUNDANE DISEASES OH HELL NAH

“But it tastes so good when it’s from your plate!” Max said with a mouth full of food.

“Oh, you want my food? Here!” Rafael grinned and threw a piece of chicken at his face.

Max caught it with his mouth cause wasting food was a crime. “Thanks, bro!”

“You little s-”

HE CAUGHT IT IN HIS MOUTH

“And no fighting over chicken!” Bapak pointed out. “We can always summon some more.”

“Order,” dad corrected. “We don’t summon. We order. And then we pay.”

“How do we destroy capitalism if we have to pay for everything?” Max asked.

Max has a point y'know

“That’s rich coming from someone who is wearing an Armani jacket,” Max stuck out his tongue.

“It was a gift!” Rafael said, furiously chewing on his chicken.

“Does that mean Bapak is a capitalist?” Max asked.

LMAO

Max: What even-

Max: Can shadowhunters get high on iratzes lol

CAN THEY???

David: Mr Herondale yelled “Yes! Two out of three!”

MOOD

PLEASE RAFAEL AND MAGNUS ARE LIKE "About time"

SAME THOUGH

“David is what you get if Dad and Uncle Jace and Uncle Jem had a baby.”

STOP NO

“Oh,” Max said. “Uh, David and I…We are dating.”

Dad choked on his coffee. “Excuse me?”

Bapak chuckled next to him. “Of course you didn’t know.”

“You two are dating?” dad demanded. “Since when? Who else knows about this? Why didn’t you tell us before? Were you dating when you were in London? Magnus, did you know about this?”

“There you go!” Max yelled triumphantly. “That’s the dramatic reaction I was looking for. Thanks, dad!”

There's alec. Yup

OH MY GOD NOT THE SEX TALK

good thing i had wattpad I MEAN-

“Kissing?” dad gaped. “On the mouth???”

“Um, where else would we kiss?” Max asked incredulously.

“Well, actually,” Bapa cleared his throat. “There are many ways you can enjoy-”

IM CACKLING

And that’s how the next hour turned out to be the most painful and most embarrassing hour of his life.

Max decided he would rather get attacked by a hoard of dragon demons than sit through it any longer

“You guys know we have something called the internet, right?” Max demanded.

“Well, the internet can have mixed messages,” Bapak sniffed. “We on the other hand have real life experien-”

“Magnus!” dad looked red in the face.

“Fine,” Bapak sighed. “Now moving on to the importance of lubrication and-”

“I’m begging you to stop,” Max groaned.

THE NOISES WHICH LEFT MY MOUTH ARE NOT OK TO BE MAKING AT 3 30 AM

“I’ll have you know this conversation utterly traumatized me. I demand financial compensation.”

HE'S SO DRAMATIC

“Well,” dad said carefully. “David is…”

“French?” Max asked.

i blame my sleep deprived ass for laughing at this

next thing i know someone's being tortured and im laughing because i dont have sleep in my system

Max honey...

listen to him

i for one, dont want a repeat of pg 511 cols

oh he's finding out about the incident

that's what i call it

Max thought of all the stories he had heard then. The one of the warlock who killed people who he could bring back his dead girlfriend. The one about a nephilim mother who paired up with prince of hell to bring back her dead son.

oh yeah...

shudder

They called it The Jem effect.

AYYYYY

It was true. In fact, he used to have a crush on both Tessa and Jem. It’s how he had found he was bisexual.

very very valid. have a good day sir

AWW MAX DIDNT KNOW HE COULD BLUSH

you know it's a sign ive been watching b99 too much that i was imagining mina talking like gina...

pls send help

ALSO MINA BESTEST SDCHJDFVYDYUGFYUGFVDYVFD

“Can we not talk about my boyfriend’s sperm, please?”

im surprised my parents havent woken up by the sound i let out

BUT HEY THE DOOR'S CLOSED SO

SUGGENS MINA

“I’m hearing an inflated sense of self-importance,” he heard Ragnor call from the bathroom. “Is Magnus here?”

“Just the spawn,” Max called back.

THE SPAWN BYE-

“He is married to the Consul!” Tessa chuckled. “And one of his sons is a shadowhunter.”

“It’s still very bad for our reputation,” Ragnor grumbled. “He is too close with shadowhunters.”

“You are the headmaster of Scholomance!” Catarina said incredulously. “You teach nephilim! Even though you don’t need a job!”

“I was coerced!” Ragnor huffed. “Manipulated by the children of the angel.”

really ragnor?

The grin disappeared and Ragnor buried his face on Catarina’s shoulder. “I can’t go through this again, Cat! Not again!”

“So much for not taking up after his father, huh?” Catarina chuckled and looked at him. “That’s nice, Max. We are happy for you.”

“We are not!” Ragnor said in a muffled voice.

RAGNOR DJHDCUHUKIHDVVFDDB

OOOO MAX DIDNT KNOW ABOUT CAMILLE

a kind of endless love...

dont make me cry

“I know you are worried, love,” Tessa’s voice was a whisper. “You are worried about surviving after David. You are worried about your own heart. But you should never let that fear stop you from finding love. Because love is what sustains us immortals. It keeps us alive. When you love a mortal, you love them forever. You might not remember all the memories. The colour of their eyes or the sound of their voice. But you will remember the love. You will carry that love inside you forever. It does not make you weak or fragile. It makes you stronger. And you will forever be grateful for it.”

my eyeballs are too tired to cry

stop it

THEY SAID I LOVE YOU

I FEEL LIKE A PROUD MOM

bitch you hate children wtf-

Max laughed. “I’m going to kill dad for making us do this. God, this is so weird!”

better get it done now

HE'S DAVID'S FOREVER

dont do this to me at 4 am

“You should two should some spend time together. Get to know each other and all of that,” Max suggested with a smile. “Maybe you can bond over archery or something.”

“I’m pretty sure he would use me for target practice,” David mumbled.

“Don’t be ridiculous, David!” Max said incredulously. “My father doesn’t need target practice!”

At this point, a David and alec scene isn't a want its a NEED

“I got it all planned,” Max said – for someone who had no idea what he was going to do.

me throughout life

max Rafael isn't the one smoking-

OH MY GOD MY DAD JUST CAME TO CHECK ON ME THE WAY I SLAMMED MY LAPTOP

“Also tell him to stop smoking!” Max pointed out seriously. “It’s not good for his health! Especially with all the mundane illnesses going on.”

“I know, Max,” dad sighed heavily and blinked. “I mean, I’ll talk to him. For sure.”

Alec if anything happens to you...just know ill raise hell

“I don’t want easy,” David smiled. “I want you.”

IT'S 4 AM DUDE

AYYY THE SHANGHAI SHADOW MARKET

CELESTIAL PALACE

“Dad? The Consul? That dad?” David looked surprised and relieved all at once. “Oh my god, he doesn’t hate me!”

“Of course he doesn’t hate you!” Max chuckled. “But he did say he will put your nerd ass in the silent city if you don’t bring me home by 11.”

of course, he did

oh my god SLEEP. there is so much to do tomorrow dying...my grammar was really bad and I don't have what it takes to use Grammarly's corrections except for the ones it's already doing as type.

this chapter had my heart BURSTING!! AHHHHHHH

the talk was so important I'm so glad they took care of that. ok imma head to bed now BYEE

Eeeeeee this was a lot sfkjdfkd I hope you are okay. Get some sleep next time or I will call the police.

Thank you as always for reading, reacting and supporting 💚

#lbaf

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loptyrs-moved · 3 years

Note

Can you talk more abt ur fandoms ocs? I like your writing a lot and would like to know more abt em

Oh my goodness I’m 🥺🥺🥺🥺 you’re SO sweet thank you!

Well, I have quite a few and some have their own deeper lore stories that go with them. If you guys want more information on them, I can do separate posts on all of them. But Here they are! I’m so excited to share my babies with you!

More is under the cut. The Picrew I used is here.

Ikemen Revolution

Black Army Side

Corrin Fukui

Age: Appears to be in mid-early twenties

Hair: Brick white

Eyes: Blood Red

Height: 4′11

Any other Qualities:

Draconic features -- She’s literally a dragon but not by nature

Curved Opalescent Horns

Shimmery opalescent tail

Wings that also shimmer in the light

retractable?

Pointed ears

Easily frightened by loud noises and sudden movements

stunted growth

Hoards blankets and comfort items

writes in a journal every day

its one luka got for her and she refuses to write in anything else. she pours her heart out on the pages, and all her memories

she had a brother! but he passed away because of the magic tower :(

turns into a gIANT DRAGON

ICE ICE BREATH BABY

Was found by Luka while on a patrol near the forbidden forest, lost and afraid, so she was taken in

Had amnesia at first

She actually is an experiment of Amon and she managed to escape

Excellent at sewing and gardening

Sufficient with baking

She’s for Luka! The way they fell for each other was a slow, gradual trust, and mutual understanding. She saw him as a man, as he was, and nothing else.

Sometimes is called Corri

gentle hearted and innocent

but not as innocent as you’d think

she’s a dragon, and she’s a greedy little one

Ophelia Dae

Age: 24

Hair: Crimson red

Eyes: Jade green

Height: 5′8

Any other Qualities:

A skilled swordsman, and one of the Chosen Thirteen

9 of Spades baybeee

While she is more accustomed to short swords and sabers, Phelia is a magic user! But she isn’t really in agreement with Ray with his stance on magic

BOMBASTIC AS HELL

BISEXUAL

“Is he bothering you Queen?”

Trans

Was friends with Ray and Fenrir while in school, and was just as much of a hellraiser as them

she was there when the day things went dark happened and was almost taken but that day is a blur for her

phelia REFUSES to talk about it

she still has nightmares

raised by a single mother

TRIVIA! She was an old fire emblem oc i had and she was the daughter of Arvis -- so if you squint when she uses magic you’ll see Valflame

joined the army probably because Fenrir was too, and she was inspired by him

she joined for her own reasons but he made it easier for her to do it too

his passion was what made her fall for him in the first place

has a personal vendetta against the magic tower for what they did to her and her friends

AND CORRIN JEEZ

will sacrifice herself if necessary to the cause

PROBABLY HAS ALMOST DIED BECAUSE OF IT

Bruh girl

Amira Nasiri

Age: 22

Hair: Chocolate brown

Eyes: Turquoise blue

Height: 5′3

Any other qualities:

My version of Alice! Difference is that she’s Persian

That’s it

She’s just as spunky as Alice

however she responds with being called Alice a little different

she’s adamant about being called Amira

At some point she just accepts Seth does it to distance himself

also an avid baker like alice

pISTACIOS

BAKLAVA

Amira is just Alice except she’s just my take on her.

She has the same vibrant spirit as Alice

and I personally consider Seth the canon route for REASONS

just ask me why fjgdfgjksd

Red Army Side

Azul Flores

Age: 25

Hair: Raven black

Eyes: Wisteria purple

Height: 5′0

Any Other Qualities:

An old friend of the Queen of Hearts

like she met him when she was 8 years old

fought his bullies when they would give him a hard time when he was a kid

they dated for a WHILE

did NOT work out

HARD CHILDHOOD

Ambitious, hard working young woman who was married into a high standing family on the Red side. Her mother was a teacher and gained the attention of one of the Chosen Thirteen on that side, and got married

Azul is NOT the officer’s daughter. She’s his step daughter

Has had extensive studies on the History of Cradle and of the Red Territory.

Wants to be a Cradle Historian

Works for the Red Army as a personal assistant to the queen

UNINTENTIONAL

THEY ACTUALLY CANT STAND EACH OTHER

Unless....

Look their story is very dramatic and it hurts me every day so please stay tuned with them.

CUT THROAT BITCH

YOUR DEVIL

DEMON

Heckles Jonah like its her job — she knows him better than anyone elsd, if anyone knows his bs, its her

Bad resting bitch face

Actually really shy, and quiet when in different surroundings

A sweetheart and will cut a bitch for you once she knows u

She is perhaps one of the most transparent, honest, genuine person. there is no bullshit with her. she will tell you her honest thoughts with you

Cerise Nam

Age: 19

Hair: Berry Pink

Eyes: Petal Pink

Height: 5′2

Any other qualities:

Her mom came to Cradle from a far off place, and set up a food and pastry shop in the Central Quarter. Met her dad. Been there since

They live in Black Territory

She works for her parents and works with the pastries/desserts

loves making desserts from where her parents are from

She knows the Queen of Hearts VERY well since she makes the best mille feuille

Got a job from him actually, and works for the Red Army Headquarters kitchen

Loves to cook and bake!

a little naïve, but she’s a realist

youngest of FIVE kids!!

Morning girl

She may be petite but she can HEAFT heavy bags of flour/rice/dry goods

Met Zero by accident, and crashed into him while in town

love at first sight for her. how can you fault her?

she thinks he’s dreamy... and sweet...

does she flirt with him a little? Cerise can’t help it...

She and Zero have more of a hidden relationship because she fears her parents won’t approve

family stuff -- and she understands

RED ARMY OFFICER?? BLACK TERRITORY GIRL

look im cheesy

dont worry it works out

zero has to consider himself and his own personal stuff too so its a little difficult

Non Army Suitor(s)

Lucile Lidell

Age: 20

Hair: Straw blonde

Eyes: Aqua blue

Height: 5'1

Any other qualities:

She and her twin, Noelle, are the actual descendants of the original Alice

Inherited unusual hairpins that were from cradle

More of the 'modern woman stuck in the wrong time' kind of gal

Rebellious

Noelle and Luci: partners in crime

Short skirts galore

Does not give a singular shit of what MEN think of her

Wants to be taken seriously

Sometimes acts like an airhead in order to get attention. She's actually pretty somber as a person and prefers to be in the background as her sister takes the stage

loves her sister more than anyone else in the world

When she and Noelle fall into Cradle, they kind of hightail it and live in the woods with Harr and Loki

Sticks with Harr since he's literally the least threatening man ever

First man to feel safe around

"Excuse me he said NO pickles!"

Will cut a bitch for him, or use magic -- luci will hurt someone if they even think a bout looking at him wrong

Loves to make clothes

'I mended the holes in your cloak for you...' 'Bye Harr, be safe and have a good day.'

'Welcome home, I missed you.'

Puts up a tough girl front but she's just a big softie just like him

Doesn't realize she has a crush on him until shit starts to hit the fan

Actually very vanilla tbh but wants to spoil her bf

Ikemen Sengoku

Ito Tsunade

Age: 26

Hair: Straw Blonde

Eyes: Molten Gold

Height: 5′5

Any Other Qualities:

Graduate student at the same university as Sasuke

got stuck in the storm with him and Mai, and was tossed into the sengoku era

but she got separated from Mai

Met Shingen first much to her luck because uh.... lets say Tsunade is aint the sharpest tool in the shed

HEAD EMPTY

ZERO THOUGHTS

AIRHEAD

her aesthetic when she gets there?

TITS OUT

BIG HONKERS BIG TATA

HOT

her head might be empty but her tits are fat and they will protect you

Music nerd — loves traditional Japanese instruments, especially the difficult ones

Specializes in girl metal in modern day

eventually proves herself and plays some sick chords for the takeda/uesegi forces

she has entertained them for now

puts sake away like a monster

when she meets sasuke, she finds comfort in the fact he’s also lost with her, so she clings

asks him how to protect herself from shingen bc he’s horny lolol

genuinely thinks sasuke is hilarious

also does NOT realize she’s in love with him until the gravest of grave happens

her name was UNINTENTIONAL

Aibana Hinata

Age: Presents in his early-mid twenties

Hair: Black Midnight

Eyes: Haunting gold and vermillion

Height: 5'3

Any other qualities:

The concubine of Nobunaga

Please know I made him a long while before the other guy was dropped so I’m just gonna offer this little gay boy

Nobunaga bought him from a brothel after being so intrigued by him. Hina entertained him so well that he was set for life

A RIGHT SNARKY BASTARD

HE KNOWS HE’S PRETTY AND CAN GET AWAY WITH MURDER

Likes to challenge Nobunaga in battles of wits

board games

debate as pillow talk

swordplay if the lords will entertain him enough

Bisexual as hell

Gender? Don’t know her

He uses all pronouns

True pronoun: princess

ONLY EXISTS IN A UNIVERSE WHERE THERE IS MAI

Nobunaga/Mai/Hinata........

Unless.......

Smart, and educated

former geisha

he can read! and write!

LOVE FUCKING WITH HIDEYOSHI

if there is mai, he would bond with her like no one else

he would be her best friend

her confidant

genuinely adores her

even if she is pursuing nobunaga, he doesn’t resent her ... he just wishes that she would find room in her heart for him too

puts up a tough exterior

a softie.....

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lazywonderlvnd · 4 years

Text

Reader Tag Game

tagged by @cibeewastaken ty angel ♡

Hardcover or paperback (i’ll die if i have to hold a hardcover book my arms are too weak and i like to lie in weird positions while im reading BUT i have all the hp books in hardcover bc im not a barbarian)

Rent or buy (i like to hoard books and look at my collection like some kind of book dragon)

Reads in silence or reads with music (my concentration? terrible)

Standalone or series (both!!! love a good series)

Annotations or pristine pages (idk i like to highlight stuff that rly resonates with me)

Ebook or physical copy (both both both i love physical books but there’s smth nice about ebooks too and we stan saving trees)

Dog ears or bookmarks (depends if i can find my bookmark or not ygdfhudjisa)

Mismatched series or complete set

Cover matters or you don’t judge (MOSTLY)

Lend books or keep them to yourself (i love giving ppl books to read but i’m also v cautious bc icb how many books have not been returned to me)

Enjoys lit classics or despises them (depends on the book honestly. some lit classics are so boring to me and i cba but i have a deep fondness for others)

Browses shops or orders online (both bitch! depends on if i feel like exposing myself to the public)

Reads reviews or goes in blind (did u think i was done saying both? i’m not)

Unreturned books or clean library record (haven’t used the library in forever but u better believe i would not have a clean record)

Rereads or once was enough (i will reread my favorite books a million times and no one can stop me)

Fanfic enthusiast or a stickler for canon (both! obviously love fanfic.....also need my canon fix)

Deep reader or easily distracted (depends on the book obviously but yeah i tend to get....distracted ygfdhudj)

Must read the book before seeing the movie or order doesn’t matter (SOMETIMES i’ll see the movie first but generally i’ll put it off until i read the book. when it comes to stephen king i will fastidiously avoid the movie until i’ve read the book tho)

Has neat bookshelves or messy bookshelves

Skips ahead or resists temptation (could never skip ahead i would die instantly)

Reads aloud or in your head

Guesses plot twists or never sees them coming (i feel like i generally am shocked by plot twists?? love that for me)

tagging: @l0vegl0wsinthedark @fae-vorite @bitozeirs @kinkybazsmolsnow tell me yall’s reading habits (and anyone else who wants to yeet )

#tagged #icb how chaotic i am

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ichor-and-symbiosis · 4 years

Note

Dragon Age + BNHA!? Run away with me. I love this!! - BNHAxxAssociates

I NEED INPUT FROM MORE PEOPLE PLEASE IM DYING FOR THIS CONTENT

imagine yourself as a grey warden? the hero of ferelden? fighting tomura every step of the way as his main adversary and growing into your respective roles over time, tomura as a powerful magister at the forefront of the darkspawn hoard and yourself as the first warden who has amassed considerable influence across nations?

finding a nest of griffon eggs and being the first warden in a long time to ride one of these bad bitches into battle? tomura being like ‘what the fuck i can’t let my enemy/lover have such a cool entrance’ and taming a corrupted dragon? constantly trying to outdo each other? trying to appeal to tomura’s sense of morality while he tries to win you over to his side? constant push and pull of sexual tension and doomed love?

my mind is racing. the tragic inevitability of your death as a warden when you hear the calling. tomura’s endless conflict because despite everything, he loves you more than anything and hates you just as fiercely. what if tomura is a dreamer and can visit you in your dreams?

what if tomura met you in your dreams when you were children, and he already knew you before either of you embarked on your divergent paths???

WHAT IF I SPEND ALL NIGHT THINKING ABOUT THE POSSIBILITIES AAAAAAAAAAA

#alison talks

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dohmaverse · 4 years

Text

Murpho gave me a new idea to infodump about!! And i have way more to say than i even thought so uh.

Welsome to house post: belvite edition(volume 1)

Maverick: A fuckin hut a mile out of town, people dont fuckin go out there for fear of the fae so its free real estate if ur not a COWARD BITCH. And his knowledge niche (carpentry knowledge from mom, being a freelance enchanter his whole life) made the sheer amount of work that needed to be done into an attainable project.

It's a patchwork of old stonework & magical lattices & exposed pipes. The only interior wall separates the bathroom from the rest of the floorspace but it still manages to be cramped by virtue of all of mav's bigass furniture. The largest bed possible(more blankets than any person needs & he probably piles his clean laundry on the bed too), many shelves full of magey materials & scrap building parts & kitchenware & bulk boxes of supplies cuz he doesnt like going all the way to town!!

Lorant: big fancy house, the greenest yard in town, inground pool & fancy wrought iron fences.

Not gonna go in depth on the whole house but his room specifically is Very Aesthetic. Pastel goth. A LOT of storage space. Plastic tubs under the bed full of fabrics & misc sewing supplies & larger photography props. His closet is devoted to clothes but he's got a wardrobe devoted entirely to storing his dolls & doll accessories. Desk w a crazy amount of drawers. Hidden compartments EVERYWHERE for his SECRET DARK MAGIC THINGS to hide. He also has a private entry to the bavk yard, which im sure his parents regret but he'd sneak out of the house no matter how hard they made it.

Kenny & gale: When Gale bought the Chime Inn, the upper floor was like, five rooms meant to be rented out, but he doesnt want to deal with that so he converted the rooms on one side of the hall into an apartment for him & kenny.

The conversion makes for an awkward-shaped home, more of a suite than anything w the bedrooms on either side of the family room/kitchen/laundry room combination. But they both have their own bathroom which is p sweet. Very much a 'dude' house, kinda junky all the time, no sense of cohesion in the decorating because all of the furniture is scavenged from thrift shops/the side of the road, smells like BO & pizza & dog at all times & shoes/bags/whatever is dropped on the floor/couch the moment you come in the door. They only clean when the funk becomes overwhelming.

The other side of the hall, one room is crammed full of old furniture that came w the building & anything else that needs stored. The other room is for personal guests, cuz gale has Issues with actually having guests stay in his home(he wants it to be a safe space for just him & kenny). Storage room is dusty af, guest room is probably the cleanest place on the entire 2nd floor.

Marta: Has a nice cozy cabin on a hill, of which she is the ONLY OCCUPANT. fireplaces & exposed rafters/beams & plush rugs & book shelves galore. Lots of seating options because she has people over constantly(SHE IS SO LONELY), always smells like tea & baked goods. Lots of counterspace for potlucks, prolly converted the dining room to another sitting area.

Has an entire room dedicated to stationary, multiple bigass cat towers. It has some real mom/grandma vibes.

Tobi & tevyn: live in the house attached to the library Tobi is watching for Alyss. Just a nice little 2-story place that has a lot of pastel blues & gingham, real rustic picnicky vibes(entirely Tevyn's doing). Well-kept like a magazine cover, lovely garden full of vegetables & flowers. Tevyn just really goes all out at being a housewife.

Tobi doesnt really have an eye for design, he just wants a place to store his books & a place to sleep. But also he enjoys a starry sky aesthetic & i can see him having lots of shiny tacky knick knacks & glow in the dark shit. Mainly this is expressed with shitty graphic tees but it shows up in the interior decorating.

Tevyn's room is very neat but also there are glass jars & containers on EVERY AVAILABLE SURFACE. they try to keep the rest of the house tasteful but in their lair they will blatantly be a dragon hoarding shinies if they want to. Half of them dont even contain anything. The walls are hung with mounted insects & shadowboxes. GLASSSSSSS.

#oh god this is an absolute monster post #oc stuff #maverick #marta #gale #kenny #lorant #tobi #tevyn #text

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roseamongroses · 5 years

Text

Antithesis (4): “these are a few of my favorite things”

Summary: For their Junior project, Roman is unceremoniously paired with Dmitri.

He’s hardly interacted with the guy, a strange occurrence since Virgil has had a weird/unexplained hate-hate relationship with him since middle-school. But it isn’t like he’s complaining. Dmitri’s cute, he compliments Roman, and damn can he paint.So Roman may or may not catch feelings, and he may not be wiling to uncatch them anytime soon.

–Dmitri returns the sentiment.

[General Warnings:] Misgendering, Past Misgendering, Past Bullying, Mild Sexual Content, implied emotional abuse, Cursing[Tags/mood:] highschool au, project troupe, fluff and angst but its all good, chat fic, teen stress, its flordia no snow we die like men[Pairing:] Roceit (Roman Sanders/ Deceit Sanders), hinted future/possible logince/roloceit/loceit [Characters] Roman Sanders/Deceit (Dmitri) Sanders, Virgil Sanders, Logan Sanders, Patton Sanders, Remy (Sleep) Sanders, Nate Sanders, Dragon Witch (Diana)

(1)(2)(3) (4) (5)

Rem: im sorry patton but no, absolutely not, unfriended, blocked, deleted

Patton: :( But I’m right tho

Rem: the day i accept that is the day i wilingingly give up my crop tops for a sensible polo shirts, cargo shorts, boat shoes, and white socks

Ro: patton hon is he being mean? do i need to get rid of him?

Rem: IVE KNOWN YOU LONGER, SINCE WE WERE BUT BABS , I SHOULD BE HIGHER ON THAT PRIORITY LIST BUCKO

Rem: plus you wont be all knight in shining armor once you find out patton thinks flordia is apart of the south (™)

Ro: …..

Ro: patton you’re blocked.

Patt: D:

V: sorry im never anti patton, you fake friend

V:I mean he’s not technically wrong?

V: the redneck culture does exist here, we have relatively similar dialects, similar weather

Patt: !!!!

Ro: patt the day i actually block you is the day the moon does like it does in umbrella academy, but v you’re on thin fucking ice

V: bitch i broke the ice years ago, you only unblocked me cause mom told you to

Rem: spOILERS

Ro: shhhh

Ro: and the GRACE PERIOD WAS OVER LAST YEAR YOU OLD MAN

Rem: I TAKE MY TIME OK

Ro: excuses excuses

V: so im assuming i won this arguement for patt right?

Ro: no. and like legit v that only applies to like,,,,parts of flordia,,,the northern part mainly but like only parts

Ro: flordia might be similar but like,,,,it's historically, culturally, geographically, and politically different then other states that are called southern states,,, t

Ro: just asked a southern boy bout it he said, “fuck no, it's a spanish colony,”

V:what about Texas huH

Ro: Texas was a whole ass country at one point, texas still acts like it’s a country, Texas is whatever Texas wants to be

V: I wish I could annex myself from this class work

Lo: God, mood.

---

“Oh, I could kiss you,” Roman said, as soon as Dmitri turned around to hand him the icecream cone. The stand was small, the old lady running it, giving them a cheerful goodbye.

When Dmitri said the museum wasn’t stuffy, it was quite literally outside. Seashell decorated pathways stretched and weaved through elaborate gardens.

Everywhere was a sight to behold, from the blossom of flowers dripping every color imaginable to trees that might as well have been sprawling giants, often dipping into the path way in a tangled, ivies creeping up it's weathered branches. In the midsts of it all, sculptures were effortlessly woven into the park, abstract student projects and places of memory creating almost a cohesive story amongst the beautiful chaos.

“Dee, when I said take me anywhere,” Roman licked his ice cream greedily, “I thought we’d go to like a starbucks- not a park more attractive than anyone I’ve ever seen.”

“So the way to your heart is food and pretty things?” Dmitri smiled.

“You bet your ass it is,” Roman said, leading them down a trail with less people, “My first crush was on this dude who gave me a seashell, I went home and told Momma and Mom I wanted marriage.”

Dmitri sipped his own water, “Do you still have it?”

“Of course, it was a gift, ” Roman hummed, “‘Bout cried when I got it,” He looked up to see Dmitri staring at him, “What? Do I have something on my face?”

Dmitri didn’t look away, “No, you just don’t have the right to be so fuckin’ adorable.” He said as if fact.

“How is me being a a hoarding goblin adorable?” Roman said, suddenly very conscious that he did not in fact want Dmitri to stop looking at him, but also very much aware that he might combust if Dmitri didn’t stop.

“Huh, are you embarrassed again?” Dmitri laughed, voice pleasant. “My aunt never keeps anything I gave her, it’s nice that you do...” He explained.

“Oh.”

—-

<3BestofMoms<3: Ro, do we need anything at the store?

R: v sent a list through notes this morning

<3BestofMoms<3: Okay, found it, thanks <3

R: np <3

<3BestofMoms<3: Are you going to be back for dinner or is that boy gunna be hogging you all day? I'm not quite sure he has earned the gift that is all day roman time

R:mommmm

<3BestofMoms<3: :)

---

As the sun stretched across the sky, the two had wandered into the more shadowed parts of the park. Roman’s initial giddiness slipping in a more lethargic satisfaction as he explored as much as he could, Dmitri’s eagerness to show him around and introduce him to the park’s employees hardly faltering.

Dmitri glanced at the time, “You ready to head back?”

Roman was crouched, admiring the tiny statues of walking fish, “No, I want to live here,” he said, “But why? Does she need you to do something?” He fumbled with the buttons of his shirt as he stood up, because dammit, clothes are hard and the sun is hot, okay?

“No, she thinks I’m studying for a class I told her I dropped, ” He said, “You just seem tired.”

“I am no--” Roman scrunched his nose, “The fuck, Dmitri, I am tired.” he narrowed his eyes, “How did you know that, I didn’t even know that.”

Dmtir made a show of looking Roman up and down, “I just knew,” He did not elaborate, and Roman made a sound that was vaguely alarmed in nature.

“V was right, you’re the worst, won’t even teach me your fancy magic tricks,” Roman grumbled, taking Dmitri's hand, and tucking himself under their arm.

“Somebody's grumpy, you sure you don’t want me to take you home?”

“I’m sure,” Roman, swayed a bit, “We don’t even need to stay here...”

He sighed, “I don’t know you seem pretty….”

“Dm-itri,” Roman murmured slow, with a half smile, and Dmitri’s mouth dried.

“Roman…”

“Please?”

“You’re practically falling over yourself,” Dmitri said, “You know we can always come back?”

Roman’s eyes perked up at that, “It's a date.” he said, and Dmitri couldn’t stop himself from flushing and looking away.

He liked that a bit too much.

!!!taglist!!!

@daflangstlairde

#Roman Sanders #Deceit Sanders #Sympathetic Deceit #Patton Sanders #Remy Sanders #Virgil Sanders Mentioned #Sanders Sides #sanders sides fanfiction #roceit #romantic roceit #cursing #crossposted #Antithesis

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pwnyta · 6 years

Text

I almost had to cancel Texas as a whole...

My mum doesnt trust anyone except me with anything so she always gives me shit to hold for her... like her shit ton of change she hoards like a weird fuckin dragon.

So I decided to be a peach and sort out her change... mostly because I cant sleep but... w/e I sorted it by coin and while I was doin that I noticed the state back quarters (OK at first I noticed the birds and I was excited thinking maybe every state had a state bird quarter and I was gonna hoard them all...). I finished the sorting and then dumped out the box of quarters and started sorting quarters.

I separated the eagle backed quarters and then I started picking out the states... putting them in alphabetical order so I could know which states I had.

And that was all fine... until I got to the final quarter. Which was Texas. I easily went through a couple hundred quarters and only had a handful left and im desperately flipping the quarters over... and then I FINALLY found Texas and all was well.

But it was a close call.

Texas you bitch turn on your location I just wanna talk.

#DUMB OL TEXAS.#Text posts.

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thatdeadaquarius · 1 year

Note

*hoards all of your writings into a giant pile like a dragon* i just think they're neat...

🥺🤲💖🍪 I SEE UR REBLOGS AND IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY TO SEE WHAT TAGS PPL ADD!! IM APART OF YOUR LIBRARY???!!! NEAT!!!???

(^^ U cant get rid of me now bitch, hope ur ready for the long run lol)

#STOP #NO MORE SWEETNESS #ILL GET CAVITIES #NARVI ANOTHER ONE OF MY BELOVEDS #genshin impact #ask box open #please send asks #my replies

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beaboutitpress · 3 years

Text

i stole dot dot dot from chelsey minnis

i stole dot dot dot from chelsey minnis…

who stole it from someone…

who stole it from someone else…

who stole it from someone else again…

who stole it from someone else again again…

who stole it from someone else again again also…

who stole it from cèline…

who stole it from girls in parisian slums…

who stole it from villon as he hanged…

taste is a weapon…

taste is distinction weaponised…

taste is distinction’s symbolic capital’s weapon x program…

i want to terrorise taste…

i want to beat it with a Woolworths trolly pole…

taste has to be lucky it’s whole life…

I only have to be lucky once…

wanting to execute taste is a distinction…

i am a social boy…

i am without distinction…

this is my distinction…

poetry is for rich people…

i like to write poetry…

even though I’m lumpen…

that just proves my poem…

villon paid his debts in poems…

i paid my debts in chronic mental illness…

I’m not crazy…i just want a pepsi…

hey…

if pepsi max was a poem then I don’t exist…

fuck kevah’s bag of dirt poems…

fucking got em…

email all complaints to soft cartel mag dot gee mail…

fucking got em…

only the bourgeois get to write like that…

i am a socialist…

cut their legs off…

no knee gets out alive…

that’s my only real political opinion…

a wave of mutilation…

just kidding…

teehee…

i often take life advice from songs…

i often take lines from songs too…

every single line is stolen…

if i live on stolen land…

it’s okay to steal…

I am stolen from…

I am the master stealer…

i steal blueberries convincing auto checkouts that they’re broccoli…

no one steals broccoli…

stealing is good for your image…

bolano stole literature…

he looked up to poets…

I look up to anna sorokin…

I look up to wat tyler…

I look up to dick gregory…

it’s okay to love your mums…

it’s okay to love lil b…

trans men are real bros…

trans women are real bitches…

so what’s really up…

im not supposed to say bitches…

i stole that from lil boosie…

writing poems like whhhhhy…

i stole that from rari…

w.g sebold was a big stealer guy…

the real stealing understander has logged on…

i love you…

life is really hard without stealing…

only rich people get to steal…

they call it investing…

fucking got em…

nothing about me is original…

not even my parents…

not even my shoes…

not even my cat…

my cat’s full name is pepsi bubbles cake…

inside me there’s a 14 year old korean girl…

like a hairy lemon…

i stole that too…

I’m not supposed to say lemon…

looking good is good for your image too…

everybody looks good but thinks they don’t…

no one looks good…

i don’t look good…

my shoes look good…

trees look good…

maybe clothes look good…

i don’t understand clothes…

my rain jacket is from japan…

i don’t know why I’m not supposed to say things…

when i get out I’m going to understand better…

here’s the line about bourdieu…

bourdieu fans you made it…

that guy just did a bourdieu line…

what a total bourdieu guy…

yep, i know things…

this poem is poetry capital…

by reading this you’re hoarding all the poetry capital…

you big poetry dragon you…

that’s how bourdieu works…

that’s okay…

really okay…

I’m okay…

really okay…

when the pills hit…

this poem is sick as fuck…

pills AND bourdieu…

poetry is a martial art…

being a poet is cool because poetry is a martial art…

my poem will beat your poem up…

martial art…

i just remembered english is a stealer too…

like avocado…

tomato…

chocolate…

meringue…

this is starting to sound too poetry…

oesteoavascularnecrosis…

that’s better…

where were we…

oh yeah…i stole the bus fair just to be here with you…

but i don’t know you…

and neither do you…

i take long walks to remember that I love you…

also remember when socialism wins im going to work 4 hrs a day…

i work like no hrs a day…

you’re thinking that’s cool but it’s not…

I’m an sjw snowflake…

that’s why I work no hrs a day…

just kidding…

teehee…

but seriously though this poem has fun…

I’m going to have to read escapism by yi-tu tuan to do the next line…

okay read it…

animals fuck, sleep, and shit…

i love, dream, go potty…

I am an animal…

I mean I’m not…

fucking poetry…

fucking phone…

fucking existential crisis…

that’s stolen too by the way…

brad lieing…

cavin gonzalez…

sean conroe…

i can drop a name to sell a poem…

ned fucking kelly…

roy…

kay em…

you…

single names are cool too…

calv because he likes my tweets…

i just did a vanity…

justlisten to parallax views podcast…

you fuck…

I can tell…

read nothing but toni cade bambara…

don’t even read this…

what are you doing…

read bolano but only if you stole it…

based mountain…

that’s my poetry name…

hey based when you gonna write a book…

fuck you I’ll never write a book…

I’ll write this line though…

it’s fun to say fuck a lot in a poem…

I’m the coolest poet because I said fuck exactly umpteen times…

umpteen seems stolen…

my bars are bottomless…

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

we’ve come full circle…

#poetry #based mountain #theft #be about it #submission

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thembo-cyanide · 6 years

Text

Tag Game

I was tagged by @some-thrilling-heroics who created this

1. Top 5 things you love about yourself?

-when im actually motivated or have energy i can get a lot done

-i try to be kind to everyone (within reason)

-im trying to be better

-ive been told by my friends that i have a nice butt and tbh i take pride in that

-im dedicated to my friends

2. What is the sweetest, nicest thing someone could ever do for you?

-ive never really thought about that??? Idk just be patient with me, or listen?

3. Do you like hugs?

-yes! But i dont really like being touched so im super picky about people i hug jxskks

4. A library or a carnival?

-a library. Carnivals are loud, crowded, and cost money and i hate loud noises+crowds and im a broke bitch. Librarys are free and quiet and people tend to not crowd. Plus books.

5. Do you have any recurring themes in your dreams?

-i have dreams that tend to pick up where they left off??? Also i always get close to my goal only to loose it. Oh and a recurring monster.

6. Favorite song this year/month/whatever?

-i mean Kesha’s entire album???? Probably Rainbow if i had to pick one.

7. What mythical/fairytale/supernatural creature would you be and why?

-a dragon cause all I do is hoard things and sleep.

8. Your top 3 OT3:

-parker+hardison+eliot

-…. I honestly can’t think of anymore rn djdjj uuhhh potentially ilia+blake+yang

- hfdhhddh uhhhmmmmmm idk rn sorry 🤐

9. Your top 3 fictional friendships:

-Tara+Sophie

-Yang+Weiss

-Parker (alice)+Peggy (i had trouble thinking for this one too)

10. You come home late one day and find a vampire hiding in your bathroom, what do you do?

-first, ask if theyre gonna kill me, if yes then i ask if they can let me get changed into more comfortable clothes and relax a bit first cause of im gonna die im gonna die comfortable damnit. If no ill ask a) how did you get in my house i thought you had to be invited? And b) why are you hiding in my bathroom? Then go from there.

11. Top 5 favorite books:

-A Game of Thrones series

-Harry Potter series

-White Fang (i read it a lot when i was younger)

-the Warrior Cats series (read that a lot as a kid too)

-i don’t remember the title but the plot is basically about this soul who wakes up in a different body every morning (they go by A). My friend bought me it when i turned 16 and it is so good, ill reblog this later with the title and full summary when I find it.

12. What’s your go to solution when you sad?

-video games and music.

13. A castle or cottage in the woods?

-a castle so i can let people who are in bad situations or something stay in some of the extra rooms till they can get back on their feet.

14. A trope you wish was done more often:

-Found family. Its my favorite.

15. A trope you’re tired of:

-its a tie between “killing the lgbt+ characters” or over doing plot twists and making it constant angst. Nothings wrong with a happy ending.

16. What character(s) would you like to have as a roommate(s), and why?

-Eliot from leverage cause hed probably cook really good food and i probably wouldn’t worry about someone breaking in.

17. Any unusual headcanons?

-none that i can think of off the top of my head???

18. Do you have a pet and if not, would you like one?

-yes! I have a bearded dragon named pancake and he is a good boy

19. Do you change your favorite color or do you stick with one?

-i tend to change, theres just a bunch of really pretty colors its hard to choose

20. Alcohol or chocolate?

-chocolate.

Tag 10 people when youre done:

@kingkyle-thelostboy @rubberbangin @downriversandroads @reallyfreakinclever @hala-sige @demigosh @omaaoc @some-thrilling-heroics (cause you didn’t answer them fjdn) @s1n-am0n @oochakoo

#smudgetalks #tag game

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floridkore · 6 years

Note

YOU SHOULD ANSWER ALL OF THE QUESTIONS

max, whyyyyyyy but imma do it

1. What did you dream about last night?

wasn’t last night to be exact, but yesterday i dreamt that @the-hog-father was a dragon

2. Have you ever had your heart broken?

yes

3. Have you ever broken someone else’s heart?

no i dont think so

4. Got a crush on anyone?

not currently no, and it’s a blessing tbh

5. Do you dress differently when you go to a party?

well, i like to look presentable since i look like trash, plus if we’re talking asian parties then heck yes

6. Do you drink?

nope

7. Do you smoke?

nope again

8. What turns you on?

who knows

9. What turns you off?

since when was i a switch

10. When can you trust someone?

i have no idea tbh, there’s just a point when i do but it sucks when you feel paranoid all the time. like i trust, but i still get doubts

11. What’s your clearest childhood memory?

hmmm a good childhood memory that i can think of right now on the spot was when i was like 9 and me being the sad child i was pretending to be my blood elf hunter on the playground :) no one had a clue what was wrong with me lmao

12. One best friend or a group of friends?

i have an amazing group of friends - excluding max. max is rude. >.> i love you really

13. Have you ever taken drugs?

who knows

14. Have you ever been seriously ill?

right now

15. Could you live without your phone?

no. how else am i gonna talk to my best friends?

17. What are you parents like?

like parents

18. Makeup or no makeup?

both. i fail so much at makeup though

19. Who is your favorite celebrity?

Demi Lovato

21. Are you a virgin?

yes

22. Have you got any bad habits?

hmmm, i mean i am a messy person. i like to hoard things like leaflets, cardboard pieces, string, wrapping paper etc etc. my mum hates it lmao

23. What does your URL mean?

honestly, i have no freaking idea. i came up with it last year and i to this day have no freaking idea what it means. it’s just pretty okay XD

26. Single or…?

single as fuck lol

27. What do you use tumblr for?

thats - thats a good question. what the actual fuck do i use this hellsite for XD i dunno, i like sharing random shit

28. If people you know follow you, do you monitor what you post?

nah not on this blog at least

29. How did you spend Christmas?

christmas dinner, doctor who christmas special, and a bunch of christmas movies me thinks

30. Do you hate anyone?

god, do i? i know i shouldnt but

32. What is you favorite song?

right now it’s swim by chase atlantic

33. What is your opinion on penguins?

they’re cute, i have a toy penguin that i called percy lmao

34. Sex is…?

is sex

35. What do you do at parties?

talk to people? i dont go out much you know

36. Got anything planned for your next birthday?

i dont at the moment although blake is coming to see me in feb so im counting that as something for my birthday *eyes*

37. Are you a big reader?

i try to be

38. Something interesting that someone has told you?

shARKS HAVE 2 DICKS

39. What’s your signature scent?

i wanna joke and say curry but i hate curry haha. i don’t really know what this means tbh i dunno what my scene is ?

40. Ask me anything!

@festive-falafel BITCH

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