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disneyprincemuke · 4 months

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oscar's girl * ls2

logan never thought he would meet the girl that broke oscar’s heart

pairings: logan sargeant x fem!reader

word count: 4.2k

notes: guys ive been writing this since 10pm girl it's mf 4am now please sue me i'm sorry this was a long wind up im sorry but dont worry i will be writing a part two HELL YEAHHHH

(logan's girl) // |(f1 masterlist)

oscar and logan, logan and oscar. that's how it's been since they had run into each other during a karting weekend in the uk a couple of years ago. oscar had approached him with a toothy grin and a packet of candy after seeing logan walk around by himself for weekends at a time.

maintaining the friendship isn't the easiest of feats: logan lives in south florida, while oscar lives on the opposite side of the globe in melbourne. they don't see each other for very long, and very often in a year. but, it always feels like no time has passed when they get together after months of separation.

but being apart for the majority of the year means the window they've got to keep an ongoing conversation is small. but their string of texts has always come in consistently every day, responses from the other flooding in the early hours of the morning and sometimes in the dead of the night.

that was, until, logan woke up one warm thursday morning to an empty and dry phone. he brushed it off, taking it that oscar just had a long day at school. perhaps too much had happened in the day to simply text at the end of the day. so he went to school as he usually did with his best friend in the back of his mind.

but one day turned into two, and suddenly he hadn't heard from oscar in almost a week.

logan had sent one follow-up text. a simple 'hey' to nudge oscar into a response. which did help, because him and oscar surprisingly texted for a short thirty-minute window before the australian called it quits on their conversation to get some sleep for the next school day.

until oscar goes radio silent again for the next three days. so, he goes to the one other person in oscar's life that he knows personally.

"hey mum," logan starts, walking into the kitchen hesitantly. he's been dancing around the idea of asking his mum for help to see if oscar's even still alive and has not been replaced by some clone that's somehow less chatty than the one he said goodbye to at the airport four months ago.

"yeah, baby?" his mother stands up from her prior hunched-over position at the fridge to smile at him. she opens her arms as he approaches her hesitantly, fiddling with his thumbs. "what's wrong?"

he hums, second-guessing his decision to bring his mother into the situation. perhaps oscar just no longer wants to be friends with him anymore? but if that were the case, oscar definitely would have said something to his face and he's just been quiet. "um, it's just oscar," he starts softly, dropping his gaze to his feet, "can you ask his mum if he's alright?"

"of course," she smiles, letting go of him. she walks around the kitchen counter to find her phone. "why, did something happen to him recently? break another wrist?"

logan shakes his head, pressing his lips together. "no, we haven't been talking as much as we used to. i'm just worried that something might have happened to him."

a blush creeps up his cheeks when his mother's lips pout as she tries to hide her smile. "aw, logan! that's very cute of you. and very thoughtful," she teases as she starts to type on her phone. "i'm texting his mum right now. you hang tight and i'll tell you when she gets up to text me, okay?"

"okay."

he tries not to linger around his mum's circle of personal space for very long, afraid to let on that he's more concerned than he should be for the status of his friendship. to combat the anxiety of potentially losing one of his best friends, he locks himself in his room and plays video games all afternoon.

he had been in the middle of a game in call of duty when his phone started to ring. he glances at from his position on his bed and perks up with oscar's picture taking over the screen of his phone.

he immediately pauses the game, tossing the controller to the side of his bed. he slides his finger across the screen to pick up the call and oscar, visibly tired, pops up on his screen with a small smile.

"hey! my mum just got off the phone with your mum," oscar whispers with a smile. "said you missed me, mate?"

"no, i was just concerned cause you've been off the grid for a while," logan scoffs with an eye roll. "i never said i missed you."

"well, i'm sorry for disappearing on you, mate," oscar drops his gaze and a small smile creeps up on his face. in the dim orange lighting of his bedroom in melbourne, logan can almost make out the redness coming through on oscar's cheeks. "there's a reason for that. it's not because i don't wanna be friends anymore. i've just been a little... preoccupied."

logan tilts his head. he rolls over to his stomach and holds the phone up to his face. "what do you mean? more preoccupied than usual?"

"yeah," oscar giggles. "i uh... i've got-" he clears his throat, the slight embarrassment getting the better of him. he lifts his eyes from his thighs and moves the phone slightly further away. "i got a girlfriend."

logan furrows his eyebrows, throwing his head back slightly in shock. "what?"

"yeah," oscar repeats with a hint of a giggle in his response. "i've been seeing her for a while. do you mind if i tell you about her a little bit?"

"really?" logan smiles, squinting an eye. truthfully, he's finding it a little bit hard to believe that oscar's suddenly got a girlfriend. they're literally always on the phone with one another, texting and updating one another on things that they've got no idea about in their day-to-day lives.

not once has oscar come up to him about a girl before, much less developing a crush on somebody. "this is a bit sudden, isn't it? like, where did this girl come from?"

"she's new," oscar smiles. "so, do you wanna know about her or not?"

"alright, fire away, lover boy."

they talk - no, oscar talks - for the next hour about the girl that's recently enrolled into his private school. all logan can do is giggle and smile with oscar at how their relationship had gone down.

even after oscar has hung up, logan still doesn't really know much about the girl he's spent the better part of the past hour talking about. oscar simply refers to her as 'my girl'.

the next time oscar and logan reunite in the uk is at the end of the year. their mothers made an effort to get flights close to one another, letting them run into each other at the mcdonald's in the airport unknowingly while getting food before heading to the hotel.

"dude!" logan cheers, smacking oscar on the shoulder roughly.

"huh?" the smaller boy ahead of him looks up from his phone, turning his head to be greeted by a familiar pair of green eyes. he immediately locks his phone and slips it into his back pocket as realisation slowly dawns on him. "logan!"

"too busy texting on your phone to even notice i was behind you the entire time," logan scoffs jokingly as a hand comes up to pat him on the shoulder.

oscar presses his lips together as a blush creeps up on his cheeks. "sorry. i was texting my girl!"

"my girl this, my girl that," logan rolls his eyes with a smile. "did she not come along with you?"

"no, mate. she's off for a holiday with her family," oscar shrugs, biting down on his lip.

for the rest of the trip, logan will often catch Oscar cheesing at his phone. it doesn't matter when or where: they could be in their hotel room watching a movie, on the track waiting for the race to start, or while they're having a casual chat before they go to bed.

one question haunts logan for the rest of their stay in the uk: who is this girl?

though, it seems that logan is never destined to meet this girl that his best friend spent an entire year gushing about. because at three in the morning on a random saturday in may, his phone buzzes with oscar's picture taking over his entire screen again.

"we broke up."

logan would stay up all morning with oscar that day, letting oscar choke back on tears for the next thirty minutes about the girl that simply packed her bags and moved halfway across the world from him. they would never speak of this day again, even after they both relocated to the uk together to start their junior career.

oscar never speaks of the girl he once devoted his entire self to, but logan often finds himself thinking of her whereabouts and how their relationship had changed oscar.

oscar never uttered the phrase ‘my girl’ when he started dating his long-time girlfriend, lily zneimer. now that they’re in f1 together, logan has at least gotten to know this girlfriend.

he is very well aware that she exists: he’s talked to and touched lily. but the question still lingers in the back of his mind about the unnamed girl, even years later.

the thought of her pops up randomly in his mind as he approaches the paddocks for his sophomore year in the sport. that was prompted by the sight of oscar also making his way into the paddocks slightly ahead of him.

“mate, i heard you’ve got a special guest in your side of the garage today,” oscar teases, stepping away from logan as he reaches out to tap his card into the reader.

“what? who told you that?” logan scoffs, passing through the gantries as he throws his head back in disbelief. “ugh, alex needs to shut his trap. i bet he told lando then lando told you.”

“no, your mum told my mum,” oscar laughs. he nudges his friend with his shoulder. “why? are you shy?”

“piss off.” logan giggles as he drops his head, shaking his head as he bites back a smile. “i’ll see you later, mate.”

“oh, i’ll see you later alright. i’ve got to see who’s making you blush like that,” the australian giggles, shoving him in the direction of the williams racing home.

logan chases his shoulder, managing to land a soft smack before he completely walks away. sure, logan had been seeing somebody for a while, and this weekend was the one he had singled out for you to come out and watch his race.

you were scheduled to come in about thirty minutes for now, about twenty minutes before he is supposed to disappear from the garage for an interview panel.

and he’s excited. this is his first time having his personal guest, who isn’t his mother or brother, in his side of the garage. sure, getting halfsies of alex’s girlfriend from the garage next to him is still something, but it’s just not the same.

so, he tries to pass the next thirty minutes as well as he can. and he does everything: he terrorises his team in the garage, then james sitting his office, then alex in his driver’s room.

still ten minutes left on the clock.

kinda early, but i’m here! :)

logan almost jumps out of his skin at the notification that pops up along with your name. he swallows back the excited scream as he runs down the stairs, pushing himself past alex and his girlfriend who were gathered downstairs with james.

logan swings the glass doors open, slumping his shoulders and feeling a wave of happiness in his chest when he sees you standing shyly by the stairs.

you look very cozy: wrapped in a dark puffer jacket and your bag barely hanging onto your shoulder. he almost wants to disappear with you into his driver’s room and cuddle all day. to hell with his commitments, even if it means fighting off his pr officer.

“hey, you!” logan beams, perking up as he jogs down the few steps to where you were. “you should have texted me when you reached the paddocks. i could have picked you up.”

immediately, he bends down to take your bag into his hands and then he pulls you in for a warm hug. “thanks for making it out this weekend.”

“of course. how can i decline a chance to watch you in your element?” you smile, leaning back slightly and wrapping your arms around him. “thank you for reserving a pass for me.”

“absolutely!” logan cheers, pulling away. “let me bring you inside and introduce you to the team. you don’t mind, right?”

“it’s my pleasure,” you smile.

he puts a hand on your back as he guides you up the racing home, pushing the door open and beckons for you to walk in before him.

“ah, lily, you were right! it’s neither his brother nor his mum that’s making a special appearance this weekend!” alex booms from deep inside the hospitality, throwing his arms in the air. “mr american man got a girlfriend over the winter break?”

“shut up, mate,” logan scowls, moving his hand up to hold your shoulder protecticely. “but, yes. this is… my girlfriend.”

he shyly looks down at you, catching your eye as you glance up at him. you’ve only recently gotten into a relationship with logan; fresh, only six weeks into the title.

“oh, it’s so nice to meet you,” lily steps away from alex’s grasp and holds a hand out to you, “i’m lily. welcome to the paddocks.”

“hi, i’m (y/n). it's so nice to finally meet you,” you smile, taking her hand. “and alex! logan talks about you guys really often. i’m a big fan.”

“oh, logan talks about me,” alex teases in a laugh, also extending his hand out to you. “good things only, i hope.”

“hey, i told you not to tell him that,” logan says through his teeth, giving you a warning stare with wide eyes.

“it’s my first time meeting him, babe,” you laugh to logan, taking his hand in yours to shake.

"oh, can i tell you about logan's antics last year in the paddocks?" alex asks you excitedly, hopping one step toward you.

"or," lily laughs, wrapping her arms around her boyfriend to steer him away from you, "let's let her settle down with logan. you can terrorise her after the day has ended, alex."

"aw, but i've got lists of embarrassing things about him," alex sighs with a frown, though he lets lily guide him away from the new couple. he cranes his neck and grins at you. "i will see you later! i'll prepare a list!"

"so we're avoiding him later," logan smiles at you, now guiding you towards the steps that would lead you to some privacy. "have you run into anyone yet? have you seen liam yet?"

you shake your head. "not yet. but i hope you'll bring me to him so that i can get to say hi? i haven't seen him since we bumped into them at disneyland in december."

"yeah, i know. he's been asking about you." he opens the door to his driver's room to let you in. "so, i've got to run for a bit. i've got an interview panel. it really shouldn't take too long. i'm sorry."

"sorry? what are you sorry for?" you giggle, taking a seat in the corner of the room. your eyes scan the small room, taking note of the endless shirts riddled with williams' logo hung in the corner.

"i don't wanna just leave you here by yourself," logan slumps his shoulders with a frown, resting his hands on his knees as he bends over to meet your eyes. "i feel bad."

"oh, i'll be okay." you wave off his concern and lean in, pressing a chase kiss to his lips. "just text me when you're done. i'll go downstairs and find lily and get to know her better."

"that's a good idea! you guys should really go around the paddocks. there's a concert somewhere too, make the best out of my pass, okay?" logan smiles, his hand cupping your chin. he brushes his thumb over your cheek as he towers over you. "text me if you get lost."

"i won't get lost," you smile, standing up from the seat. "i actually haven't had my coffee yet. do you know anywhere i can get a cup of coffee?"

"oh, lily should know where," logan hums, tapping his bottom lip as he heads for his door. "let me get her for you."

"logan." the firmness in your voice stops logan in his tracks, turning around with curious eyes. "i can find lily on my own. i'll be okay - i'll see you later."

"are you sure? i just feel bad that i'll leave you all by yourself," logan whispers, leaning in to kiss your cheek. "i'll miss you."

"i'll miss you too. but you've got a job to do," you giggle, walking out of his room with your hands wrapped around his arm. "i won't disappear. i'll meet you wherever when you're done. just text me."

"fine."

so logan goes and does his media commitments with alex in tow. and lily clearly had the same idea as you, meeting you at the front doors as alex walked away with logan.

"logan mentioned you were looking for coffee?" lily beams, quickly finding herself by your side as she leads you around the paddocks. "i know the best racing home to get a good cup of, but we might have to sneak in."

"sneak in?" you tilt your head. "is that even allowed?"

"yeah, carmen will get us in! mercedes has got the best cup of coffee to offer around here," lily giggles. "and, you should meet the rest of the girls. what are you going to do for the rest of the evening while the boys are out doing their jobs?"

"i suppose you're right," you shrug with a small smile. "but it's my first time here. should i really be caught sneaking into another team's home?"

"ah, you're with me," lily smiles. "i've got you."

so you actually get your cup of coffee in the back of the mercedes' racing home, now finding yourself huddled together with carmen and lily. they had asked you how you had come to meet logan, especially after the driver had spent most of it behind closed doors and rarely showed himself to the cameras.

it was a pretty simple story. you had been on vacation in new york with a group of your friends, minding your business in the corner of a crowded bar. truthfully, you didn't even want to be there, but it was your best friend's birthday trip. you couldn't say no even if you insisted.

logan had caught sight of you pretending to drink shots your friends were handing you towards the end of the night. eventually, you wound up with about six filled shot glasses hiding behind you, desperately hidden from your friend's prying eyes.

he thought it was funny, and had offered to finish them for you. in exchange for a promise that they were not laced with poison.

you had hit it off, and logan asked you out on a date. while you were unfortunately flying off to another state in a week, he had taken up the challenge and took you out on a date the very next night in the heart of new york city.

the rest is history, as they say.

"does logan actually ever say no to free alcohol?" carmen jokes, blowing into her cup of hot coffee. "wait! there's a concert happening not too far from here. do you guys know who's performing?"

"it should be on the race's instagram page," lily sighs, swiftly taking her phone out of her pocket. "but aren't the guys finishing up their interviews by now?"

"it's a long weekend. would they really notice if we weren't here for one break that they have?" carmen points out knowingly with a smile. "and we've got to show her," carmen gestures towards you, "around. is this your first race weekend?"

you nod shyly, taking a sip from your coffee. "but it's okay, really! don't go out of the way for me."

"that's silly." lily runs a hand through her hair and sighs, resting a hand on her hip. "okay, so, let's meet the guys near the pit building. when they're called in for their driver's briefing, we make a run for the concert area, okay?"

"that sounds like a much better compromise." carmen turns to you with a playful smile. "we will teach you how to make the most out of logan's race pass. you're going to have so much fun with us."

"after the concert, we'll head upstairs to the viewing pen and get a couple of drinks," lily smiles. she glances down at her phone. "oh, seems like they're already done. you guys wanna head there together?"

"sure!"

you start backpedalling from your position, ready to follow the two veteran paddock enjoyers. that seemed like a good idea until your back collides with something - someone - and suddenly you've got mildly hot coffee all over your top.

this is the one time you regret unzipping your jacket to let a bit of the cold in.

"i'm so sorry."

"it's fine," you say with a soft whine, turning around before being flashed by a bright orange jacket and a pair of brown eyes. "it's..." you tilt your head. "do i know you from somewhere?"

the shape of his polite smile and the way his brown eyes look into you are all very familiar. but you just can't quite place a finger on it.

perhaps it's because he looks a lot different from the last time you saw him. you were a wee fourteen-year-old the last time you had seen him before you were forced to pack your bags and move away because of your dad's job.

but, as a kid, you generally did a lot of moving around because of that said job. now you're just trying to single him out by geographic location from the many friends you've made and lost contact with over the years.

"(y/n)?" oscar's eyebrows shoot up, your name coated thickly with an australian accent as his hand lingers on your shoulder.

"oh, you two know each other?" lily excitedly asks, looking between the two younger individuals.

who seem to be very caught up in their unexpected reunion. you'd be shocked too if the girl you had thought was the love of your life shows up at your big boy job with your colleagues' girlfriends with a mercerdes coffee cup in hand.

"yeah, we uh," oscar takes a step away from you and puts his hands in the pockets of his team jacket, "we used to go to school together. in melbourne."

"right," you sigh in relief, finally being able to place him in a particular timeline of your life. you finally remember him: oscar piastri, the school heartthrob with a charming smile and friendly eyes. he had even asked you to be his girlfriend at some point, dating for the better part of a year before you had to leave melbourne with your family. "oscar, right? i'm sorry, my memory's a little bit hazy."

"no, yeah," oscar agrees, scanning you head to toe. "it's been... how long has it been since we last saw each other?"

"very long. it's been years since i left melbourne." you lower your cup and readjust your jacket, trying to hide the prominent wet patch of coffee at the collar of your inner shirt.

but the longer you stare at him, the more the memories come rushing back to the time you spent with the best friend you had made in melbourne for those years. you can vividly remember oscar picking you out in pe to be his teammate, sneaking out of homeroom to grab a juice pack together right down the hall.

you had completely forgotten the tears you shed that day you had to leave melbourne. you swore that you would keep in contact with the warmest brown eyes your eyes have ever seen, but you had simply gotten too busy settling into the new environment that had been thrown at you.

before you knew it, you had dropped your phone into the lake when you were out with your friends and you lost oscar's phone number. you never found a way to reconnect with him, and eventually, he had joined the long list of friends that you had forgotten about.

"i," oscar laughs, "what are you doing here in the paddocks? are you friends with them?"

"no," you straighten your back with a polite smile, "i'm with somebody - logan."

and oscar's never wanted to ever tear apart the paddocks' walls with his own hands before. what do you mean his girl is here with his best friend?

#logan sargeant x reader #logan sargeant x you #oscar piastri x you #oscar piastri x reader #f1 fanfic #f1 x reader #f1 x you #disneyprincemuke #disneyprincemuke imagine #disneyprincemuke imagines #disneyprincemuke f1

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taehyunsluvr · 22 days

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⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ Boy Next Door ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

warnings: sub!soobin, afab!reader, dom!reader, making out, friends to strangers to lovers, nerd!soobin, nicknames (noona, soobie), kinda leg riding?, first time, pervert!soobin, not proofread

a/n: short, kinda a random idea but fits him. We all know he'd he such a boob guy. Theres lore guys theres lore okay trust me

!!MDNI!!

Everyone labels him the "nerd" of the neighborhood because he's kind of the guy everyone uses for homework answers. Your friends, they can be a bit harsh. They sorta.. kinda.. bully him? That sounds realllyyy bad but really all they do is tease him from time to time. For small things like his glasses, the way he dresses, yk the usually things. And yeah, you've laughed along a few times. It felt wrong, but it was worth it to be friends with them.

Though he's always kinda been your friend, secretly. He helped you out with math when you were practically failing, listened to your endless rants about whatever drama was going down at school, and never asked for anything back. Thats just all he was though, always there, kind of like part of the scenery of your life you never really paid much attention to.

Then randomly at school, Soobin comes up to you. He's looks of nervous, which honestly wasn't that weird for him. He purposefully tried to meet you when your friends were getting snacks during your break.

"Y/n," he mutters, "there's something I really need to tell you." You just stare at him. You were kind of annoyed because if your friends saw you they would never shut up about you talking to him. "I like you, more than a friend like. I've felt this way for a while but didn't say anything because I know how it is with your friends..I know you laugh with them, and it's cool but we're graduating soon so I didn't want to miss the opportunity." You didn't really give him an answer. You just stared at him, mouth open slightly and with a confused expression before he walked away.

It pissed you off that he just HAD to tell you. It was awkward as HELLL and now you couldn't even ask him for help with work. And not to mention finals were like in a week. And now you stood in your kitchen, pissed of because your mom told you 5 minutes ahead of time that the Choi's would be coming to your house to have dinner. Was this a joke? Well you wanted to make the best of it. At least you could play around with him for the time you had. You tried slightly with your outfit and makeup, but no too hard. When the door opened and his family entered, you were sitting on the couch. You got up to greet them all, glancing at Soobin. He had his usual black framed glasses on, and a plain outfit.

"Hey you came." You waved slightly to him. He VERY awkwardly waved back, looking at his feet avoiding eye contact. "Mom we'll be in my room." Now this would sound suspicious if it wasn't for the fact that you've known each other since you've worn diapers. You both made your way up your stairs, and into your room. "You can sit on my bed if you want." He nodded silently. "Soo.. anything new with you?" You wanted to talk about something, ANYTHING to break this awkward suffocating feeling. It wasn't just awkward, but you were also still pissed. You weren't pissed at the fact that he abruptly confessed, but more by the fact that he didn't let you give a proper response. He constantly avoided you at school and pretended not to be home when you brought stuff over to his house for his family. Did he think he was alone with his feelings?

"Some people started a rumor at school.." He said breaking the silence again. "They said we're a couple. You raised an eyebrow. "Oh yeah? You sure you didn't start the rumor yourself?" You teased. He looked genuinely bothered. You scoweled. "What? Does it make you that unfomfortable that people think we're dating?" He quickly retorted, "N-no..! I just thought it might make you.. annoyed"

"Ill decide for myself how I feel, thanks, I dont need you deciding that."

"thats not what I meant.. I'm sorry noona.." He said repentually.

"I never even got to respond to you that day. Maybe the rumors would have been true if you let me speak." You said moving slightly closer to him on your bed. He looked confused.

"My answer is I like you too, and I do want to date you. So does that answer suit you? Or were you expecting rejection?" he paused. He felt a bit embarrassed when you so bluntly expressed your feelings to him. He wasn't expecting a positive reaction, so he felt hesitant on if he should speak or stay quite.

"H-huh?" He couldn't tell if you were teasing him or not. "If you're actually serious then why didn't you just tell me then?"

"Because you didn't give me the opportunity to. Well its good we got that out of the way. I'm actually really excited now. We can do tons of fun couple things." She said facing him.

"We-w-what?" The whole mood shifted. A moment ago you guy's were all serious, which was totally out of character for you. Soobin was taken by surprise as you leaned closer. "What 'couple things' are you talking about..?" His voice broke as he spoke.

"we could play around and.." she leaned closer to whisper to him, "I would even.. let you touch them." She leaned back away from him and laughed hysterically while cupping her chest in her hands.

Soobin felt his entire face immideitatly turn red and his heart rate shoot up. He felt like he could die from embarassment as he felt his body heat up because of the teasing. He could only slightly nod. "W-well I guess.. we can do that.."

"Oh so you're admitting to being a pervert?"

"I-it's.. not like that" He said answering quickly. "I'm not.." it was a joke you often said to him before.

"You've thought about it before haven't u? How they felt?"

"W-well.. um.. yeah.. I have thought about it.. but that doesn't make me a perv.." His face flushed even more than before.

"It totally does. But your wish is my command." She took his big hand and placed it on her chest. Soobin immediately felt a sudden warmth on his hand. It was like every nerve was being stimulated, and his breath began to become more heavy as his heart rate increased. You never knew boobs turned guys on this much. Or maybe it was just Soobin..

"You like it right?" You teased.

"W-well, I mean.. they're- they look really soft and I.." He trailed off and he was stuttering profusely. It was already too much for him to handle.

"you're already this flustered from feeling my clothed chest?' He nodded in a mix of shame and embarrassment. His face was completely red now. You wanted to test his limits. You leaned onto him, pressing a soft gentle kiss onto his lips. You just wanted to test the waters. His eyes widened in surprise as he felt the unexpected sensation. He hesitated for a moment before slowly parting his plush lips. The kiss became more rough, and you pulled his waist, so once he attempted to pull away, naturally he fell onto his back on your bed. He gasped for air, his body trembling under yours. His hands moved up to your shoulders, trying to push you away but finding it almost impossible to resist. The warm touch of your hand started to spread all around his torso as your fingers began to run over his skin. He let a groan before speaking, "M-Mmph...p-please don't.. dont't stop.." You moved your mouth down to his kneck, slowly trailing kisses down his sensitive skin.

A shiver ran down his spine, and he let out more groans as he tried to hold onto u, not wanting you to stop. You lifted up his plain tee revealing his chest. You brought one of his even more sensitive nipples into your mouth, gently sucking. Soobin let out a soft moan, and he couldn't help but arch his back slightly. You could feel his heartbeat now, and he could feel himself getting harder under your touch. You felt it. It was huge. Wasn't he the nerd everyone asked for homework answers? Why did god give him everything. Looks, brains, and a huge cock. She let out a teasing laugh.

"Somone's excited." She lifted her knee in between his legs.

"M-mhhh..mm n-noona.." His moans became even more intense as you pushed into his hard erection through his sweatpants. He couldn't hold it in anymore. "M-more..please," he managed to whisper between ragged breaths. She gave attention to his swollen nipple while still pushing her knee into him. The sensations were overwhelming. His body trembled. He pressed his hips forward in an attempt to get closer to the sensation you were creating. "Fuck.. I can't take m-more.." His voice strained. "Mm.." He tried to hold back, but as soon as he felt your hand slip down under his sweatpants onto his hardness he couldn't help but make noises of pleasure.

"Shhh.. these walls aren't sound proof soobie." You told him, knowing there was no way anyone downstairs could hear if they couldn't hear your blasting music that you usually played on your speaker. His body tensed up and he felt himself about to climax, his hips bucking forward. "noona I'm- I-" With a suppressed and strained moan he released his seed into his sweatpants, panting heavily as the wave of pleasure washed over him. He took a second to fully come down to realize the situation. His legs still twitching, he felt both incredibly embarrassed and incredibly speechless.

"Oh- by the way I'm sorry for laughing with my friends.. before.." She had a complete 360 in the way she treated him but he didn't even seem to notice-- or care. "I-i don't even care anymore." He said calmly. "Can you grab me a tissue?"

#txt hard hours #sub!soobin #nerd!soobin #loser!soobin #txt smut

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cupoftaae · 11 months

Note

HII i'd like to request prompt 11 "give me time, give us time" for kookiee? and if its ok id like to give u a small plot just in case you dont know how to work with this if thats okay 🥺

so the tiny tannie lil ol plot for this wuld be: jk being a bit of a workaholic (very much so.) and y/n is quite tired of it.. note that this is non!idol and married! :D they had a talk and a cool plot twist wuld be how y/n was actualy planning to surprise him abt being pregnant!!!GASPAND THEN KOOKIE NEVER NOTICED THE SYMPTOMS CUZ HES BEEN WORKING TOO MUCH!!! and like yeah she getzz rlly emotionsl

AND IF ITS OK CAN U GIVE LIKE AN AFTERMATH OF THIS? LIKE 1 OR 2 YEARS AWAY FROM THE ARGUMET? hope this isnt too much 😭

Hello!! oh my goodness this is so amazing, no one has given me a plot to write by, this is really cool and I hope that I do a good enough job portraying this for you! Thank you so much for sending this in <3

La La Land (JK drabble request)

warnings- mentions of drinking, angst, mentions of pregnancy, swearing, couple fighting, fluff, kissing (nothing major) I think thats all?

enjoy <3

"I cant tell, is this a positive or negative?"

Your voice was shaky and frail, holding up the test to your phone camera, trying to show your friend.

"blurry, cant see, read the box y/n. instructions are there" Your friend sighed, in her defense, it was late, and you called her out of slumber- but only because you were totally hyped at the sudden realization that you were finally possibly pregnant.

You and Jungkook had not necessarily been trying, nor necessarily avoiding it.

You both wanted kids, but never really specified when. Considering the fact you have now been married for 2 years, and your relatives are up your ass about when it is that you will have a baby, even though its not their business at all.

You wanted this for you, and today might be the day you get what you wished for.

"You just took it, let it sit for a moment"

you nodded at your friends words as you placed the test onto the bathroom sink, moving your hands to rest on your hips as your teeth tugged at your bottom lip in thought.

"whats on your mind, hun?" she asked

"a lot..." you giggled, drawing your eyes back to her. "If I am, I just hope Kook is happy, thats all I want"

"mm his schedule is so busy"

"I know, work always comes first with him, thats why im nervous. Its not like he told me to take birth control or anything, and we have condoms he just refuses to use one" you snicker

She laughs, "well then yeah what did he expect?"

"but hes a head manager at the company he works at, hes spent so much time climbing the ladder to get there, what if this throws him in a loop?"

"y/n....girl...listen to me, he is partially responsible for this, so he needs to be accepting or I will personally come down there and make him accepting"

You laughed at your friend, thankful you had some humor relief out of all the tension.

"and listen, you are in your 30's, its not like you are 20 years old and unmarried, you know?"

"yeah...youre right...im gonna look now, I think its ready"

"okay"

You gently flipped over the test and held it close to your eyes, a faint blue plus sign appeared, making your heart thump so loud it was audible in your ears.

"holy shit, its positive!"

"its positive?" your friends voice shot up 3 octaves

"YES!!!" you jumped around, wishing jungkook was home right now to show him, instead bathing in the moment with your best friend.

"congratulations, y/n, oh my god im so happy for you!!!"

"thank you!" you wiped a few tears, gripping the test almost as if it wouldnt be real if you let it go. "oh jesus this is so....wow!"

"remember what I said, everything will be okay"

You nodded, taking a deep breath

"everything will be okay, yeah....your right."

Everything, in fact, was not alright.

It's been 2 weeks since that night you found out you were pregnant, and everytime you think you are ready to tell Jungkook, something happens.

"oh gotta go babe, they are calling me into work"

"too tired to talk tonight honey, i have to get up at 5am"

"not right now baby, maybe tomorrow?"

It never ended, he was in and out the front door constantly.

It was upsetting that the only time youve had to talk with him recently was when you both took a shower a few days ago.

"you look so tired" you frowned, pushing his hair back

"I know...I am"

"you need to sleep more" you kissed his chest, resting against it under the warm water.

He let out a soft laugh, "yeah...when is there time for rest?"

"its okay to take time off, you know? youre a manager, you have more control"

"I just need to prove to everyone that I am capable of handling the position" he insisted

"Obviously you are, they wouldnt-"

"y/n, just dont worry about it....okay?" he squeezed you softly, trying to change the subject and shutting you down, because you wouldnt get it

You wanted your husband, you wanted him more than anything, and this feeling only turned to anger as you sat with him at the dinner table one night.

You were now almost 2 months pregnant and still have not told him.

You planned a nice meal to eat, his favorite.

You cooked all the vegetables and spent hours slaving in the hot kitchen making sure everything was up to perfection for him, just for him to come home at 2am with no text in regard to him being late.

"its late, honey, im sorry, we can eat tomorrow"

You stood to your feet before he could leave the room, all of your dishes sitting on the stove, some now cold. "no, we are gonna eat now."

You know he smelled the food, and never did he once acknowledge the fact you made his favorite dish, or thank you for it.

His eyes widened, not used to hearing the sudden tone in your voice.

"please....please just sit" your voice cracked slightly as you watched him slowly walk back to the seat, sinking into it.

"are you mad at me?" he whispered, watching your back as you heated up the food into a plate for him.

"mad..?" you chuckle to yourself, trying to gather your thoughts.

"yeah, mad. are you?"

You took the food out of the microwave and handed it to him, sitting on the other end of the table and looking at him desperatley.

"jungkook...have you noticed anything...different?"

He smiled gently, confusion in his eyes, "what do you mean?"

Your expression softened from hopeful to dissapointment.

"you dont see...you dont feel like anything is different?"

"no?" he half smiled, looking around awkwardly.

You looked down at your plate, teary eyes overcoming you as you tried hard to prevent your breakdown- but its been a long time coming.

"wha-"

"jungkook!" you cry out desperately, leaving him shocked and confused at the odd behavior.

"baby why are you crying? whats going on? what is this?" he panicked

"You!! im crying because of you!!" you stood, covering your face as you felt the embarrassment fall over you.

"what did I do?" he got up and tried to come over to hold you, but you pushed him away.

He let you talk, not knowing how to respond to anything.

"you are never home, Jungkook. I fucking miss my husband, okay? I spent 4 hours in this kitchen, sick as hell, making your favorite dish and I dont get any type of thank you, instead you come home 3 hours late and decide its time to sleep, you reek of alcohol as well" you wipe you tears hastily.

He stood, looking at you as his eyes teared up

"I know work is important, I know it is, But I matter too Jungkook!! We are married, I am your WIFE! im not just the maid and chef here, you know?

"baby I never said any of that-"

"you treat me like one!!" you cry, pacing the room, "see, you still dont even notice anything do you?"

He looked helplessly, "Im sorry, honey, I really am, but I need work-"

"not this much!!" you looked at him sharply, "Ive been home alone these past few weeks, dealing with a certain situation ive been terrified to tell you about all by myself!"

"im here now, tell me! tell me! what is going on and how can I fix this?"

"I just want you, jungkook....One fucking day, one fucking dinner" you gesture to the table "When was the last time we even woke up together and cuddled, or had a fucking cup of coffee and talked? Months...MONTHS!"

"my angel im sorry ive been neglecting you, why didnt you say something to me sooner?"

"I was trying to understand, I was trying sooo hard to put myself in your shoes but damnit, jungkook, I cant hide it anymore" you sobbed, knowing how crazy you looked to him right now. "Its...its not fair!!"

He gently grabbed your arm, leading you towards him, his eyes searching deep into your own.

You sighed, trying to adjust your breathing, "g-give me time, give us time." you wrapped your arms around yourself and looked at him.

"us?"

You swallowed harshly, trying to steady your voice, "im pregnant, Jungkook. I found out weeks ago and since then youve left me home alone with not an ounce of time for me to tell you, which is now resulting in this"

He froze, his eyes softening at you as he tears up, "pregnant? baby..."

"yes!" you step back, "and...and you didnt even notice! I tried leaving clues, I left the test in your bedside nightstand and you never fucking saw it?"

"n-no baby...youre pregnant, oh my god, honey" he brought you back to him, a soft yet sad smile on his face

"Its been all me, im the only one who has to deal with it and its not fair. If you dont have time for me, how the hell are you gonna manage to parent our child?" you glared "I refuse to parent alone, this is a team effort, jungkook. Yes money is important, but I need you, I need you to stop being a manager first and my husband second"

He took a shaky breath, part of him scared to say the wrong thing, "I- I understand honey" he nodded, holding your hands as he cried "fuck- im so sorry" you let him pull you into a tight hug "Im so sorry holy shit...im such a fucking dumbass, how could I not know?" he ran his hand up and down your back, face hidden into your shoulder as you both cried.

"you need to understand, I am serious, things have to change!"

"they will! they will! I'll change right now I promise Im gonna be here for you, for both of you" his hands held your stomach, desperation in his voice "dont leave...." he whispered

"im not going to, jungkook. But you need to stop working so much, I cant do this by myself"

"you dont have to, im here for you, whatever you need, fuck I'll take the rest of the week off for you, just let me hold you" he squeezed you tighter

"I miss you so much" your voice was quiet

"I love you, im so sorry I never noticed, Im so dumb baby....I love you,I love you" he cupped your face and pressed a delicate kiss to your lips, forehead against yours, "thank you for all you do, im an ass for not recognizing any of it"

"I love you too....just please...do it for us...?"

He nods "anything....for you, i'll do fucking anything baby." he kisses you once more as you both gently sway in the kitchen. The tension of the argument still lingering in the air, thick and prominent.

This wasnt a fixed issue, more so a stepping stone to him proving his words.

If he wanted to be a dad, he needed to show you he was ready for it.

"he is crying again" you sigh, rubbing your eyes and sitting up to look at the baby monitor.

"I'll get him" jungkook immediately got up and walked down the hall, following the sad cries that led him to your baby's room.

"little man...its 4am...why the tears?"he frowned at his 3 month old who's arms flared around.

the first 2 months of Kaiylin being born, you kept him in your main bedroom at night but you wanted to test out how he would sleep on his own, and so far its not been good.

"you want mama, huh?" he picked him up, holding him close and gently bouncing his knees. He didnt smell, so it wasnt his diaper, and he had just been fed not too long ago, so it was easy for jungkook to know he just missed his mommy and daddy.

He slowly walked into the bedroom, you were about to fall asleep. "oh kai" you frown as your husband places him into the bed between you both, his body facing the smaller ones so he doesnt fall out or move around.

"aw baby" you rub his head softly, "its okay now, shh, shh"

Jungkook gives you an empathetic look, "I know you havent slept im sorry"

You shrug, "i'll nap tomorrow"

"I'll take him into my office, he can sit in his rocker while you nap"

You smile softly kissing your husband, "thanks, baby"

You had to admit, Jungkook has stepped up more than you assumed he would. Hes began to work from home, giving time for not only your little family, but especially you and him.

He has been such a help with everything, from watching Kai during the night, to cooking and cleaning for you, its been 100% teamwork since you gave birth and you couldnt thank him enough for it all,

Things were finally starting to even out and you could not have been happier, the man you married in the first place was returned back to you, in the form of a loving father.

"hes sleeping again, look" jungkook whispered

Your eyes darted to the newborn in between you and your husband, you slightly giggled, "poor thing"

"co-sleeping just works I guess" he smiled, leaning over to kiss you gently, "go back to sleep honey, ill watch him for a bit, its okay."

"I love you, thank you..." you looked at him

"I love you too sweetheart"

a/n- ahh! I really hope this is what you wanted, it was fun to write and follow the prompt. Thanks again for sending this in! -Nini

#bts #bts fanfic #bts smut #jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #jungkook scenarios #jeon jungkook #jungkook #jungkook drabble #bts fluff

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frecklystars · 1 month

Text

im gonna start making doodles trying to reclaim my TF F/Os that i've lost, maybe once a week or once every two weeks... or once a month?? i dont know, i will try to keep some consistency but i really need to start slow on this. here's to hoping that drawing them every once in a while will make even just the smallest difference.

im so sick of associating these characters with my abuser and i'm so sick of the immediate fight or flight response that i get when just looking at pictures of TF characters or even the voice actors. i have tried just about everything... therapy, medication, exercise, watching a few clips from the shows, buying cameos, commissioning art/fics, talking to voice actors in person at conventions... nothing has helped me get better at all. i tried giving up on TF entirely, throwing out/giving away all of my TF merch, refusing to touch the franchise, but that has only made me more and more miserable as time has passed. it has been over a year since [insert the most horrific experiences ever here] happened to me and since i associated that with a long list of things, TF included. and im! sick! of feeling bad! so! if im gonna be miserable no matter what, then i might as well try to get better, right?? drawing my F/Os loving me has never failed me before, so here's to hoping it isn't gonna fail me now. i am quite the stubborn bitch and i refuse to allow my main coping mechanism i've used for 2 decades to remain tainted forever and ever 😤😤

these will be the shakiest, shittiest doodles imaginable, but i think drawing the robots i miss so much at least once a month can help me rewire my brain into believing they're safe again and they love me and i'm not in danger. i think the best thing that will help me is drawing my Ryan F/Os interacting with them as "proof" that they're safe to be around, that they've "approved of" them, will help me slowly reclaim them. fake it til you make it as they say. let's try this for maybe just a couple of months as a slow start and see how it goes :/

any TF doodles will be tagged as "reclaiming robots tag" and nothing else - free to blacklist it if you dont wanna see. i'll most likely be rarely posting these but jic //shrug

anyway. yay. attempts number one and two. i like to think barbie and ken stop by the starflower meadow every now and then because stsc summons them across the multiverse, asking them how i'm doing, if i'm safe, if i miss him at all. wow i am shaking so bad. ha ha haaa. these took about ten?? minutes?? so woohoo to ten minutes of drawing TF. im proud of myself for trying. even if i dont go through with this and end up not being able to draw TF ever again, at least i managed this one single post. if i keep this up, maybe a year from now, or two years or five years or whatever, i'll be able to handle it. i don't even expect to hyperfixate on TF ever again because my self shipping will never ever be the same w/ them -- i'll never interact with the fandom again, i'll never reblog fanart or gifsets or anything like that ever again, if i even somehow managed to feel good enough to actually throw myself back into the shows -- but i want to think i'll feel indifferent to it one day. to not have that fight or flight response. that is my goal. literally the bare fucking minimum <3

anyway. i'm super nauseous. this is so incredibly hard! holy shit!!! but that's why i have to do this. to quote pedro pascal, i am going to have a panic attack and i am going to leave 👍✨

(BTW I am still gonna stay offline for a few more days. I am back from vacation but I am SO burnt out I don't want to interact with dms/my inbox yet. I just wanted to post this just to get it out of my system and let it disappear into the void. But I will be back later this week bc I still have some commissions to finish and I wanna gush about my very exciting time meeting steve/tom/the brba cast. anyway... goodnight. i love you. smooch)

#reclaiming robots tag

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kumezyzo · 9 months

Text

yea idk. this is the q&a metioned in this post. 1.5k words... and its all bf!sapnap 😁😁

the spaces between questions are supposed to indicate that a little time has passed, like a cut that would be in a video.

shout out to 🐬 anon for helping me with some of the questions! theyre absolutely amazing 💜💜

anyway, enjoy! or dont.... :) m.list

you and nick sat infront of your desk, both of you going through your phones, making sure you have the questions you both picked out from the responses on your tweet.

you put your phone down and set up your recording. nick reached over, keeping his eyes on his phone, placing his hand on your thigh. it was almost like second nature for him to then start rubbing his hand up and down your thigh.

you pause for a moment, your camera recording. you looked at the moniter that showed you what your camera was seeing. at the very bottom, nicks hand was clearly in your lap, moving slowly. the sight made butterflies flutter in your stomach for a moment.

"you ready?" you ask, looking over at your boyfriend, your eyes darting to the hand on your thigh before looking back up.

"mhmm..." he hummed, double checking one last time before looking up and smiling at you.

"okay then..."

"hey, guys! so, we're finally doing that q&a that we said we might do during our announcement video!" you said, smiling into the camera. "we- well, I tweeted out 'ask questions for a couple q&a' which is kinda cringey but gets the point across!" you laughed awkwardly.

"yea, i mean, to be fair, we just needed something to get people to ask questions," nick said shrugging comically by lifting his arms.

"yea..." you said trailing off. "okay lets start!"

'when did you start dating?'

you read the question out loud, looking up into the camera, "a few months ago. this past november," nick nodded in agreement.

"that kinda goes with one of my questions 'how long did you guys like eachother before you started dating?'"

"oh.... umm..." you trailed off, thinking back to a few months ago when you both started talking.

"ive liked you since the first moment i saw you," nick said dreamily making you shake your head with a snile.

"shut up," you said with a giggle. "i think it was maybe a few months before then... august, september-ish? i think by then it was less of a platonic relationship if im honest."

you looked over at nick, to see him already staring at you. you smiled at him in confusion, tilting your head slightly.

"i think i liked you before then. i always thought you were really pretty. and like you were funny and nice. it just changed for some reason," he said looking into your eyes softly. "and im glad it did..."

you let out a soft breath in surprised confusion. you looked back at the camera and tried to hide your smile.

"phew... okay your turn to read a question!" you said, trying to shift the tension.

"i just did, peaches," he said nonchalantly. you looked into the camera, your eyes widening for a second before you tried to hide the flustered look on your face.

'what did the dream and george think when you told them you were dating?'

"dream already knew i was going to ask you out the night it happened. i had been talking to him about it a lot and he had kinda been telling me to just get it over with," nick said, looking at you as he spoke.

"poor guy," you said shaking your head. "he had to hear about how much you were falling in love with me." you said, flipping your hair.

"yea, he did get tired of hearing about it," he said laughing. "and george just kinda knew, i guess."

you laughed, "he texted me like a week before we officially started dating. he asked me 'are you and sapnap dating? or is it going to happen anytime soon?' and didnt know what to tell him."

'who asked out who?'

you raised your eyebrows at him in amusement once he read the question, "you should answer this one, lover boy."

nick chuckled softly and smiled. "i asked her out..."

you waited for him to continue before you realized he wasnt going to. "oh, come on," you scoffed. "okay, he called me super late at night and-"

"no! they dont need to know all of that!"

"and he basically told me that he loved me and that he wanted to be my boyfriend."

nick groaned as his face began to turn red. you grinned at him and gave him a peck on his cheek. he playfully shoved you away as you giggled.

'do you have nicknames for eachother yet?'

"just babe and baby, really..." you said, trying to recall anything youve called him aside from his name.

"same for me... and i call you peaches," he says, failing to hold back a grin as he looks at the way you shake your head.

"and mamas-"

"okay! next question!" he cut you off, causing you to let out a loud laugh.

nick looked at the camera mischievously as you waited for him to ask the next question.

'favourite position?'

"i think mine would have to be cowgirl," he says nonchalantly, keeping his eyes on his phone as he answers.

your eyes widen at him before your hand shoots to cover your mouth in shock. you turn to stare at the camera, speechless as you lean foreward and rest your elbows on your desk, covering your face in embarrassment.

nick giggles loudly, his face turning a deeper shade of red as he watches your body shake in embarrassed laughter.

"what is wrong with you?!" you yell, your voice slightly muffled by your hands.

he let out a similar high pitched laugh as he got up from his chair and covered his face in embarrassment.

you turned your face in your hands to look at him as he shook his head at you, a groan leaving both of you.

"im keeping that in."

"no youre not!"

"i have to!" you said laughing at the way he shakes his head at you. "youre the one that said it!!"

"but your not supposed to-" he groans, "dont put it in!"

"its going in!" you bleeped him saying which position in post

'is yn moving into the dream team house?'

nick looked at you, not knowing how to approach answering your question.

"i think it would make sense in terms of me being the 'honourary dream team member'," you said with air quotes. "but i dont think i will be moving in." you finish with a smile and looking back down at your phone to find your next question.

"wait you dont want to move in?" nick asks, looking at you in confusion with his head tilted slightly.

"thats not what i said," you said with a confused smile.

"so why dont you?" he asked, this time more as an invitation.

"wha- i mean-" you stammered trying to think of a way to make sense of what just happened. "you want me to?"

"of course i do," he smiled.

he leaned in and gave you a peck on your lips. you smiled and your eyes darted down to his lips again. you licked your lips subtly before leaning back in and kissing him longer this time.

nick reached his hand up to hold the side of your neck as he deepened the kiss. he licked your upper lip, causing you to lightly part them. he took that as a chance to pull on your bottom lip and lightly suck on it before pulling away from you completely.

he pulled away and licked his lips as he nonchalantly pulled out his phone to find his next question.

you looked at him speechlessly and flustered. if you looked close enough at his phone, youd notice he was staring at his home screen, also trying to compose himself. you were just trying to make a mental note to cut that out of the video. you did dw

'why did you decide to announce it now?"

"i think it was just that it felt right," you said, shrugging. "we have been officially dating for like five months-"

"technically four,"

"no?"

"baby, yes,"

"nick, if it was the end of november-"

"its not even a week of november that we dated!"

"and then the entirety of december, january, february, and now the end of march?!"

"thats four months, baby. and maybe a week!" he said waiting for you to do the math in your head. your eyes darted around as you thought for a second. then you pursed your lips and looked away from both nick and the camera in embarrassment.

"I'll still love you dont worry," nick said, reaching back over to your thigh and giving it a soft squeeze.

"shut up," you said rolling your eyes.

"wait, have a question," nick said as you were about to say your next one.

"okay," you said, unsuspecting.

'how many times a week do you have sex?'

"nick!" you look at him in disbelief.

he giggles mischievously, "it really depends on the week, sometimes its every-"

"okay! thats all we need for today!"

"isnt it 'all we have for today'?" he asks with a smirk.

"no today, its all we need," you glare at him. "im done with this q&a," you say as you shake your head.

"thank you guys so much for watching! i hope you enjoyed? dont go subscribe to him! but definitely subscribe to me!" you say with a smile on your face.

"what why?!"

yea idk if i like this much, its kinda bad. i hope you enjoyed. comment, request shit, like. idk 💜 -nony

#🐬 anon #sapnap #sapnap x reader #sapnap x you #sapnap fluff #sapnap x y/n #sapnap x streamer reader #sapnap x streamer #smutty?#stan 🐬 anon

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milkovichrules · 6 months

Note

sorry to come into your ask box but i just rewatched mickey’s coming out scene and i just… i get choked up every time. i love ian but i also feel like he pressured mickey into coming out. of course he had to set his own boundaries but he KNEW how badly mickey was treated when it came to his sexuality, it’s almost seemed cruel to give him that ultimatum in some way. but then mickey comes out and all he could do was look at ian and ask if he was happy!!!! like i cant even explain all the emotions noel was able to put into his voice in that moment, it literally break me just thinking about it! he knew what was coming and he still only wanted ian to be happy.. thats really just something. i dont even have words for it but i wanna let out the loudest scream about it

hello sweet thing!! you're always welcome here💕

tbh the coming out scene always reminds me of noel's fucking beautiful ig post about Ian's character but especially 'the truly remarkable thing about Ian's inner courage is that it's infectious. to put it simply, he's brave and an undeniable reminder to those around him; they can be brave too.'

I used to absolutely not be at all but I am definitely an Ian defender about this to a certain extent.

like do we enjoy ultimatums? fuck no. it's a shitty way to go about it. BUT I have to think about what's probably going through Ian's head, right? keeping in mind he's in/just coming down from what we can only assume is his first ever manic episode.

mickey came to find him, literally carried him home and protected him from creeps. gave him a place to stay and didn't just plonk him on the Gallagher's doorstep, actively chose him over his marriage. went to the Gallagher's when Svetlana kicked him out and asked him to come back, agreed to do whatever he wanted to get him to stay with him. slept next to his tiny bed on the floor.

mickey kissed him, full on made out with him in public!! that's so huge!! he accepted an invitation to a little gay party with ian's new friends. he slept in the same bed with him without fear in a house full of strangers!! he doesn't even know that mickey told that guy that they were together 😭

we all know mickey is an acts of service girlie but Ian is the kind of person that needs to hear it too. and when Ian DOES ask it's 'of course we are'. like it's a given. mickey doesn't need to have the conversation, but Ian does. and as far as mickey's concerned 'it's working out so far so good' to be a couple that hides.

there's a million reasons mickey might want to still keep them a bit of a secret (though its a pretty open secret at that point). sure I think some of it is to protect his reputation, to not have any sort of weakness, and to some extent I think he feels a lot of pressure in protecting the reputation of the Milkovich name, no matter how infamous it is. maybe because of how infamous it is.

but I also think it's because what he has with Ian is theirs. and its something in both of their lives that's genuinely really beautiful.

like not to bring up 3x666 but that's obviously the moment that the bubble really burst. he had built up this little secret life with Ian behind closed doors and he was opening up! he was falling in love! and once people (Terry) found out it was just ripped open completely. ruined. I think there's some element of mickey wanting them to be back at that place before it all went to shit. which of course, they never can be.

just like when Ian starts heading for the door in the alibi. he doesn't think mickey's going to do it. Ian's going to walk out and not see Mickey for a while and then in a few weeks it'll be 'just cuz I've got a wife and kid doesn't mean we can't still bang' like it was back then.

but now mickey knows what it's like to lose him and he doesn't ever want to do it again (which 🥲 but anyway)

the fact that when Ian tells mickey he's sick of living a lie mickey's immediate response is 'I'm not lying to you' somebody fucking sedate me

and of course Ian wants mickey to come out so that they can be together but 'you're not free' absolutely kills me because he just wants mickey to be okay with being himself openly. and 'what you and I have makes me free' and ian's FAAAACE but then Terry shows up and he has to watch mickey tear himself away and go straight back in the cage and it hurts. of course it hurts.

so Ian drinks a little and lets himself stew and shoves mickey toward the edge of the cliff.

mickey's voice when Ian tells him not to bother coming back and he says 'what the fuck are you talking about?' breaks my heart every time because they're fine, aren't they? they just have to get through this bad thing and then they can go back to their little bubble.

mickey's always in survival mode, just varying degrees of severity. you can see him, literally see it on his face, weighing the options.

what's gonna happen if he does nothing? he's going to watch Ian leave. again. he's going to get blackout drunk and go home with his wife and his son and his fucking dad and wake up like that every morning for however long he can stand it. he's going to be walking on the eggshells of his own broken heart.

what's gonna happen if he says something? he's going to be physically hurt. he's going to bleed. he's going to have to bite and scratch his way out of that bar unless he's arrested or knocked out first. there's hopefully enough people around to keep Terry from straight up killing him. and what else? Ian stays. Ian stays and they get to go home together. take care of each other. sickness, health, all that shit.

so he does it. he shouts and he bangs on that table and he says it and hes fucking brave!! because he might think he's fucked for life but he has one beautiful thing that's worth fighting for!!

oh my god and him asking 'you happy now?' I fucking knooowwwwww honestly it makes me a little bit? insane? there is SO much going on there.

fucking getting everyone's attention to announce he's fucking gay and 'I just thought everyone should know that' and then looking at the only other openly gay person in the room and going 'you happy now?' jEEEEEsus like?????????

the eyebrow raise as well like 'you know exactly what's gonna happen now' and of course it does.

but Ian absolutely no hesitation gets stuck right into the fight!! and he says 'I've wanted to do this forever' which, same babe. I too would take a chair to the back wrestlemania style to defend mickey milkovich.

all my blorbos shitty dads I would be in your walls but you're all dead so✌️

#I can just go on and on about this apparently #this is literally over 1k im sorryhfkd idk what happened to me #answered #gallavich #gallavich meta #shameless

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thatoneapollokidevan · 11 months

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Can i please request rottmnt famous actress! Female! Reader x all boys turtles?

Type; platonic, friendship, HCs.

The plot is about reader who joins April's school & tho everyone are going nuts over her (she's beautiful, have a career & they're fans of her work) the turtles weren't so excited because they thought she would be your everyday stereotype famous actress; spoiled brat, bossy...etc. So imagine their shock when they met her & find how of sweetheart, caring person she is.

I love this <3

Actress

Rottmnt x fem! Reader platonic

M/N = Movie’s name

C/N = Character name

• You were new to this school

• Since you’ve been homeschooled your hole life bc of you being an actress you were very excited

• The day you came you were already overwhelmed

“Omg Is that actually Y/N”

”isn’t she the girl that played C/N in M/N”

• As much as you were happy people thought you were a good actress you knew that people would take advantage of this

• It’s been a week at this school and you were pretty tired

• You haven’t talked to anyone making some people thinking you were rude

• That was until you got randomly paired up with this girl named April

• you were pretty awkward bc you weren’t used to this situation

• As much as you tried you couldn’t say

“i can do this” or “let me do this and you can do that”

• it made you believe you were rude and i think April thought so to bc that same day she went to the turtles to talk about this

“It was so annoying she didn’t do anything nor tried to help” she said laying down on the sofa

“Ugh i hate those people” Donnie said

“How could she think that is okay i mean you- she- ugh i can’t think right now” Mikey said

(bc i hc him to get really frustrated and might even cry when he can’t really word what he’s thinking)

“are you sure she just isn’t shy” Raph said obviously trying to be more mature of the hole situation

“Yo April next time ya’ see her look her straight into the eyes and say: You’re NOT the boss of me and you also need to help” Leo said with his hands on her shoulders”

“okay next time i meet her ill just say that*

*time skip to a couple days later*

• You were both at Aprils apartment to do the assignment

• You were still awkward bc this was a very new situation

• just when you were about to speak April suddenly interrupts you

“hey i know you’re an actress or whatever but that does NOT give you an excuse to be rude to people” she tried to be more calm but it still came out as a pretty harsh tone

“Y-yeah sorry” you said and started to work

*skip to after the sun went down*

•the turtles and April were out playing basketball as usual

“I GOT IT” Mikey said but then the ball bounced of the basket

“Great job Mikey” Leo said sarcastically

“Leo don’t be mean” Raph said noticing Mikey was pretty upset about it

• little did they know you were there going on a walk with your neighbours dog

• You saw the hole think happen and even though they were literally mutant turtles you saw that they were upset

• you tied the dog to a lamppost while you started to climb that tree

*the next day*

•since it was Saturday you decided to just walk to Aprils apartment you brought some homemade baked goods to apologise to April and give her the ball so she could give it to her friends

•when you knocked you got no response so you decided to open the door to be met by April and the four turtles

• They were staring at you like ‘why tf are you here’ kinda look

“I’m sorry to interrupt but i saw that you lost your basketball and i just wanted to give it back” you said not looking at them bc otherwise you would get to nervous

“Aw sweet” Mikey basically yelled

•They were pretty shocked you would even do anything like this bc they thought you were rude

“oh April I’m sorry i didn’t hell that much on the project but here” you place a basket on the floor that smelled amazing

“why are you doing this i thought you didn’t like me?” April asked

“well i- i dont dislike you i was just kinda nervous for the project and i- I’m sorry i came of as rude” you said

• they noticed you’re very serious and not just doing it bc you had nothing better to do

Let’s say they liked you more then they thought

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Yay I’m done and I’ll maybe do a part 2

#rottmnt #rottmnt x reader #platonic rottmnt #rottmnt x reader platonic #fem reader

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bridgyrose · 2 months

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Sugar Rush Angst

(I still need to actually name this one)

Nora slammed a mug down onto her table, ready to give up trying to find Ruby. No matter how many missions she went on, no matter how many rumors she followed, Ruby was nowhere to be found. It was almost like she’d just… disappeared completely. Every rumor about a girl wearing a red cloak led to dead ends of a few huntresses in training that wanted to be like Ruby. Every failure drained her.

“Maybe its time we take a break,” Ren suggested as he finished his meal, checking his scroll. “I know you want to find her-”

“I’m not giving up on her,” Nora said, annoyed. “She’s still out there and I need to find her!”

Pyrrha put a gentle hand on Nora’s shoulder, giving a quick squeeze. “We’re not asking you to give up, but we’ve run ourselves ragged. We need a break.”

Ren nodded as he checked a message from Weiss. “None of the divisions of the SDC have seen Ruby or anyone that looks like her and Blake lost the trail she was following. We might be getting to a point where finding Ruby may mean finding out she’s gone.”

Nora sighed and dropped onto the table, letting out a few deep breaths to hold back a few tears. “She… she cant be dead. Not yet.”

“Lets give ourselves a couple weeks to rest and then continue our search,” Pyrrha suggested. “Ruby’s a survivor. I’m sure she’ll be fine.”

“Fine.” Nora slowly picked herself up and left some money on the table to pay for her food. “I’m… I’m going to take a walk.”

Pyrrha nodded. “Dont be out too long, alright?”

Nora sighed and walked out of the inn that she ate at, feeling the brisk Mistral air run across her skin. The sun had started setting and the streets were starting to empty, but that didnt bother her much as she walked alone with her thoughts. No, what bothered her was that there was a chance that she’d never see Ruby again, never be able to hold her or tell her one last time that she loved her. That the love she felt would be lost.

As the sun finally set, she let out a heavy sigh as she started to make her way back to the inn to meet up with her team so they could set out to Vale in the morning. It felt wrong to give up, but, in the end, she knew Pyrrha and Ren were right and they could continue the search after a rest. And pushing mission after mission in hopes of finding some sort of clue didnt seem to be helping.

Nora paused for a moment as she watched a few rose petals flow through the wind. She caught one and watched it disappear in hand, quickly looking in the direction the petal came from. A smile crossed her lips as she saw a figure dash from rooftop to rooftop, only one person she knew was able to do that. Without a moment to lose, she quickly pulled her scroll out to text Ren and Pyrrha about what she saw and rushed off towards the figure without waiting for a response. She used her hammer to help get a bit of height to reach a rooftop and started to follow, her heart racing as she found a trail of rose petals to follow. Nora finally stopped when she got close enough to stay out of the way, freezing up when she did finally see Ruby along with another person.

An arrow flew past her and embedded itself next to her, then she watched as Ruby rushed towards her. She quickly readied her hammer to block the swing of a scythe, arms shaking as she stared Ruby in the eyes.

“N-Nora?!” Ruby asked as she pulled away. “What… what are you doing here?”

“I’ve been looking for you. Now we can go home-”

“You need to leave.”

Nora pulled back and lowered her weapon and watched Ruby as she looked back towards the figure she was with. “I-I dont understand. You’re supposed to come with me.”

“I… cant.” Ruby took a breath and tightened her grip on her scythe. “And now that you’ve seen me, you’re a loose end.”

Nora quickly moved out of the way as Ruby slashed at her with her scythe, holding her own hammer tightly. “What’s going on?” she asked as she noticed the mechanical arm on Ruby, her heart nearly stopping. “And what happened to you?”

“I was fixed!” Ruby said as she sliced at Nora again.

Nora took another few steps back as she avoided Ruby’s scythe, starting to get nervous as it came closer and closer to her. She stopped at the edge of the rooftop, her foot slipping off the edge as she felt the metal blade of Ruby’s scythe press against her chest. “R-Ruby, please, dont do this.”

“I… I dont have a choice.”

Nora froze as she heard an explosion and watched some smoke start to rise in the distance. An arrow pierced into her shoulder as her aura broke, still not quite recovered from earlier. Her hand shook as she reached for the arrow, feeling blood drip down her arm. “You dont have to do this. We can go back to Ozpin-”

“I’m sorry, Nora.”

Nora lost her balance as she felt the end of Ruby’s scythe slam into her, falling off the rooftop and onto a few crates on the ground below. She grunted as she tried to pick herself up, dropping to her back as she closed her eyes. Her eyes fluttered open again as she grunted, seeing the ceiling of the inn she had been staying at, body sore as she tried to sit up.

“Not so fast,” Pyrrha said as she helped her up. “The doctor who patched you up said you’ll have to rest for a few days to let your injuries heal.”

“I-I… I found her…” Nora struggled to get out, her chest hurting with each breath. “I found Ruby.”

“And… you’re sure you found her?”

Nora nodded as she propped herself up, holding her shoulder. “I’m… I'm sure. But… she was… with someone else.”

Ren sighed and got up. “Sounds like she might be involved with the attack on Haven. I’ll go talk to Lionheart and see if I can get anything more.”

“But Ruby wouldnt-” Nora sighed and looked down at the bandages that wrapped around her torso. Ruby wasnt the one who shot her, but was the one who pushed her off that building, even if it was only a couple stories tall. “But… she was seen there, wasnt she?”

Pyrrha sighed and gave a small nod. “Not her but… there were rose petals there along with some cuts from a scythe. We have to tell Ozpin.”

Nora nodded and sighed as she watched Ren and Pyrrha leave. She laid back down, wincing as she did. “Ruby, what did you do?”

#rwby #nora valkyrie #lie ren #pyrrha nikos #ruby rose #rwby ruby rose #drabbles #sugar rush #sugar rush angst

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help-i-need-a-cool-username · 6 months

Text

Currently thinking about jjk characters on tik tok despite having not been on tik tok in two years 🤣

I cannot be convinced that Nanami isnt on it. I feel he'd love using it to relax. He'd just be responsible about how long he's on for and only go on it off work hours. He's a lurker who has no videos or faved videos of his own

However i also love the idea of Gojo and the kids always trying to pull trends on him and he either a) has no idea thats whats happening or b) pretends he has no idea thats whats happening. His uninterested manner makes all the videos hilarious. They do a lot of "ask your gf/bf" and "ask your dad" ones to him. Yuji will be like "please do a tik tok with me 🥺" meanwhile Gojo and Nobara blantantly have the phone up and in his face constantly ("Nanami how often do you think about Rome?" *nanami turns a page in the book he's reading* "an adequate amount" "a 'adequate amount'?" "yes" "and that would be..." "a normal amount" "nanami. please.")

Gojo loves tik tok. Feel like he'd be on instagram more often though. He puts out tik toks like twice a week. You can find at least one of the kids or a coworker in 90% of his videos because he takes them as soon as he gets the idea to. He buys the sexy leggings and records everyone's reactions to it ("Gojo, why?" "Shoko you're no fun", "Gojo this is a school" "yes i am aware. Now do i look good or do i look great?", "i think you look good sensei!" "thank you Yuji!" "yeah, well i need brain bleach"). He'll do the relationship ones with whoever is sitting closest to, and the most popular ones are with Nanami (no, no, we're not dating. We're coworkers... why, did Nanami say something? Does he think im hot?)

All the kids dont do much. They're addicted but they dont have a lot of their own videos. Nobara has the most and its her and Yuji doing the dances or her commenting on celeb outfits. Fushiguro has one and its just a montage of Gojo making faces. Yuji also has a lot and its misc (flips, "put a finger down", reactions, etc) but Nobara has more bc she makes a lot of outfit roasting vids. Think Maki and Inomaki might have a couple out there as well

#hinacu jjk #jjk #tik tok #saturo gojo #kento nanami #yuji itadori #nobara kugisaki #megumi fushiguro #jujutsu kaisen #nanago #kinda

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stormblessed95 · 2 years

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It's a topic you already discussed previously but now we got many new infos I hope you will answer this.

Even in latest vlive Jimin told he's setting up an alarm and waking up - which means he's alone.

He's ordering food from outside and it's really a mess to clean up - there's no one with his who knows to cook.

He's working full time on music and when he rarely gets out it's alone - means there's no one he spends much time with.

RM told he's going to meet jimin now multiple times- I.e they are in same apt complex and only jimin lives there.

K army having zero spotting of jikook now - it used to happen when they were living together in nineone which JK rented.

But some big jkk blogs, including you, are still spreading misinfos like Jikook live together. I think you should change that statement by now as many new armys are following you. They may have lived together in 2020 when Jimin didn't had his apt or JK haven't rented brunnen. But things obviously changed now so you still sticking to old things is not right. It's no different from Tkkrs spreading lies saying it's their opinion and their own account. Or not stopping shipping tkk when it's almost obvious Tae maybe dating another woman now.

Okay, well I don't really CARE if jikook live together or not. Which is something yall keep really wanting me to care about. If they do or don't, it changes nothing about my opinions on anything else. And in every other post about this. I've said "we DONT KNOW if they live together or not." That's not misinformation. If I said, jikook live together and it's fact, you could call that misinformation. But you know. You tried. And here is the thing. We STILL DONT KNOW IF THEY LIVE TOGETHER OR NOT. lol you don't know either. You just think they don't. And that's FINE. So, take my response to this in the good faith that I mean it with. None of your bullet points here hold up as proof of living alone. And that is not me saying it's proof or not proof that jikook live together. They might. Or they might not. But you can't pull these facts from your ass and act like it's the end all be all of the "discussion" that I keep saying I don't care about having and yall keep trying to make me have. Lol but sure, let's get into it.

1) Waking up to an alarm doesn't mean you live alone. 😅😅 literally what?? I set an alarm when I need to be up by a certain time and im not confident the other people in my house will be up by that time and therefore end up waking up me anyway. And I live with MULTIPLE other people, not just my spouse. My partner sets an alarm a lot more often than me. Anytime he needs to be up earlier than normal for work or for an event he has planned with his friends, he sets an alarm. If I'm having a particularly bad health week, he will even go sleep in his home office and set his early alarm since he wouldn't want to risk disrupting my sleep if he needed to get up early on a week where it's clear I need more rest than normal. Does this mean we don't live together? Please a poll at how many couples who live together use an alarm (either together or seperately) or even just how many roommates do too 😅

2) Ordering food for most of your meals means you are busy and don't have time to cook or sit down for a meal even. Which, we know Jimin is. And I know we all joke about JK being Jimins cook and blah blah blah. But Jimin DOES know how to cook for himself too. He manages just fine. Lol and complaining about the mess of cleaning up either from take out or cooking, again. Doesn't equate to living alone OR living with someone else. "No one there who knows how to cook" lol EXCEPT FOR JIMIN HIMSELF?! Please go run a secondary poll about how many cohabitating couples order way too much takeout on overly busy weeks. Please also ask them if this means they don't know how to cook 😅

3) how hard Jimin is working again doesn't mean he lives with someone or alone. And saying he rarely has time to go out with people, doesn't mean never nor does it mean he isn't staying IN with anyone either. Plus, it's discounting the few times we have seem him go out and about with his FRIENDS. Lol like the soccer game he went to with Jhope. Or when he went and celebrated JKs birthday with him. Or all the times RM (which you bring up next) said he went to go visit Jimin. Not going out, but staying in.... so what does visits with friends or hanging out with others in the rare bouts of free time this year have to do with who he does or doesn't live with?

4) RM said he is going to visit Jimin multiple times, ie, only he lives there and it's in the same apt complex. Thats alot of assumptions, love. Lol just a lot of assumptions. And again, saying you have plans with a friend doesn't mean that friend lives alone or lives with someone either. Nor does it mean that Jimin was at home. Jimin ALSO said he had been practically living in the studio. Various studios. Even spending long late nights in the studios. Please tell me where Namjoon said he was going to go see Jimin at Jimins house where Jimin was there alone? For all we know Jimin was at the studio with his wife actually. Thank you very much. ��🤣

5) K army, the good ones, tend to keep their spottings of the members to themselves ALOT. You think the members only get spotted the very few times it ends up leaking onto the timeline and shared? Wow. They must be better master's of disguises then I thought! Not to mention, I've already done a post over this! I hope you'll read it

Everyone knows for fact about if someone is spreading misinformation over things like translations or an event like a kiss backstage that never happened. That's not an opinion. Your opinions over if jikook live together are other peoples are allowed to be different. There is not fact anywhere nor is it hurting anyone or disrespectful to a language or culture for other people to disagree with your opinion. And fyi, I'm not a big jikook blog. There are many many others that are much larger and do much more in ways of content than I do. I have my little corner of the internet and i stick to it. Nor do I tend to like to associate my opinions with the opinions of the "jikooker masses." I have my own, I'm willing to share them. I don't care if you agree with me or not. I'm willing to correct myself and be corrected if and when I'm presented with facts about ANY of my opinions. I think living together discussions aren't necessary. And I'm tired of repeating myself.

Thank you.

#jikook #kookmin #jikook living together #jikook theories

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sokkas-sword · 2 years

Text

flickers (chapter five)

sokka x female reader

summary: after the events of the swamp and avatar day, the gaang try and rest for a couple of days before continuing the search for an earth bender to train aang

warnings: mentions of death - nothing else i think this ones pretty lighthearted :)

wc: 3.5k

masterlist

prologue --- chapter four -- chapter six

a/n: long time no see - this is actually a record for me not posting anything in a year, i was just so busy and then when i wasn’t i didnt have the motivation to write. so sorry for taking so long and i dont even know if people are interested in this fic any more but i’ve written some more for it again so might as well post it and hopefully will not disappear for a year again. anyways i went back and made a few changes through the story already written including the addition of a nickname for the reader (mainly because i dont like using y/n all the time) but yeah this a little filler chapter so there is more of a connection between the characters before i ruin it for them in a few chapters time :)

“Alright! This place looks great!” Aang clapped his hands together as Appa landed in a large clearing, a stream running through it and into the forest that surrounded them.

She watched the avatar jump from the bison’s saddle and onto the dirt below where he stood with his arms wide, a huge smile on his face. And she couldn’t help but smile back at him - his positive energy was infectious and it meant the prospect of staying in this clearing for a few days more appealing - especially as the water tribe siblings were still a little hesitant towards her.

Although, after their experience in the swamp, and whatever went on in Chin on Avatar Day, she had noticed Sokka being a little more caring towards her and Katara was doing her best to be civil. So even if they didn’t trust her yet, they were trying and so was she - so hopefully, their relationships could only improve from there.

The idea of having a break from the Avatar's group constantly getting into trouble and other situations that make her head spin if she thought on it for too long, put a smile on her face as she climbed off Appa’s saddle, the feeling of dirt beneath her feet allowing the tension to melt from her body. She may have only been with this weird group for a week or two now but she wasn’t yet used to flying on Appa, her fear of heights making her uncomfortable every time they travelled on him.

Caught in her own thoughts as she reached for her bag, she didn’t notice Aang trying to get her attention, that was until he airbended himself right in front of her a bright smile on his face as he spoke, “Hey Lia I was calling your name, do you want to play a game?”

She blinked at him, surprised by the nickname she hadn’t heard someone else call her in over a year now.

The lack of response confused the young avatar, waving his hand in her face he asked, “is everything okay? You seem a little out of it?”

“Yeah I’m fine,” she nodded at him, “it’s just you called me Lia.”

“Oh, am I not allowed? It’s just you said to Momo that’s what your friends call you and we’re friends right?”

A warmth spread through her chest at Aang so nonchalantly calling her his friend, she was Fire Nation and apart from Ria, had never really had friends that weren’t themselves from the Fire Nation as well so this meant a lot to her.

Realising she hadn’t replied back to him yet, she gave him a small smile, “Yeah we’re friends, I just haven’t had someone call me Lia in a while.”

“Well get used to it, travelling with Team Avatar gives you the opportunity for loads of friends! It’s one of the best parts!” He gave her a thumbs up before turning to look at the Water Tribe siblings who had been watching the interaction silently, and when Aang subtly indicated they should do something, they both smiled at their new acquaintance. And even though their smiles looked more like grimaces, y/n felt just a little more accepted into the group than she was this morning and that was enough for her.

She turned back to Aang, answering his original question from before she’d gotten sidetracked “well we should help set up camp first but then we can play a game if you want?”

“Yep sounds great!”

It didn’t take long for the four of them to set up a small camp, Sokka going off into the trees surrounding them to collect some wood for the fire, Aang scouring through the bags for some food for them and her and Katara setting up the tents. It was quiet whilst they completed the task but y/n didn’t mind, it allowed her time to think about all she had already experienced with the Avatar and his companions.

She still avoided thinking too much about the swamp debacle where she saw her mother and the old man, less she become emotional, but the whole Avatar Day situation they’d stumbled into in Chin was much easier to focus on if not confusing in a different way. It was interesting to see a place not associated with the Fire Nation hate the Avatar as much as they did, even if they had their own misguided reasons, but the similarity of misinformation on specific topics between the people of Chin and what was taught in the Fire Nation had struck a chord in her. Obviously, there were still great differences between the situations but it still had affected her more than she had thought it would. And it led her to become more grateful that she had started to push past her previous teachings and learn how much damage the Fire Nation was doing to the rest of the world and all the people in it, especially how it had affected the people she was starting to become close to.

It didn’t take long for the group to finish setting up camp and whilst Katara began cooking, refusing the offer of help from y/n, Aang began his task of having fun and tried to drag his new friend into the game he had planned earlier.

“So it’s called ‘don’t fall in the quicksand’ and basically the first one to touch the floor loses, but you have can try and sabotage your opponent by trying to get them off balance however you can.” Aang briefly explained to her.

“Oh I used to play that when I was younger, except we called it ‘the floor is lava’! And you’re looking at the reigning champion young Avatar.” She smiled teasingly at him whilst she gloated, ignoring the pang in her chest at the thought of her and Zuko playing this in the palace gardens when their parents weren’t around.

“Ha! I’m an airbender Lia, so unless you have a miracle tucked into your tunic you’re going to lose,” he looked over at Sokka to see if he wanted to play as well but he was already shaking his head at the pair.

Y/n chuckled to herself at the Avatar’s confidence, yes he may be an airbender which gives him an incredible advantage, but unfortunately for everyone she has ever known, she had always been unbearably competitive and today was not the day she was going to start losing at a child’s game.

She tied her hair up into a top knot and started walking to the treeline, waiting for Aang to call the start of the game. She didn’t have to wait long before his shout of “QUICKSAND!” was heard across their little camp, she quickly jumped onto the tree beside her and climbed up the trunk to perch on a branch strong enough to hold her weight. Happy with where she was she began looking for where Aang had ended up, only for him to be on a tree on the other side of the clearing, waving at her.

Waving back to him she started figuring out how she could get over to him and get him to touch the floor without herself falling and losing the game.

Unbeknownst to the two already chasing each other through the trees trying to push the other one off, the Water Tribe siblings watched them from their spot next to the campfire. Katara shook her head at the pair, turning back to the food she was preparing and muttering under her breath, “one of them is going to get hurt if they’re not careful and then it will be my problem.”

Sokka turned to look at her from where he had been watching y/n laughing at Aang as she flung a branch at his face so he almost fell off the branch he had been on. “Come on sis they’re having fun, not committing crimes, lighten up.”

She glared at her brother, “She’s Fire Nation Sokka, we know as well as anyone the damage they can do, I still don’t fully trust her - what if this is some plan to capture Aang?”

“Look,” he placed his hand on her shoulder pulling her focus from where she was angrily chopping vegetables, “I agree that we should be wary around her, but honestly from what I’ve seen, she seems to be, I don’t know, a nice person maybe? Definitely not what I expected from someone from the Fire Nation. And at the end of the day if there was some ridiculous plan to capture Aang, I’m not sure it would involve playing games with the Avatar.”

The pair looked up at the trees again to see y/n throwing some sort of berry at Aang’s face in quick succession, momentarily blinding him before kicking at his ankles so he fell of the low branch he had been standing on, and before he realised what had happened he had touched the ground and the Fire Nation girl was hooting in victory in the trees above him.

Sokka gave a small smile at the site and turned to his sister, finishing off what he wanted to say, “I’m just saying I think we should maybe give her a chance to prove herself and earn our trust before we decide she doesn’t deserve it. I’m thinking of asking her to teach me some of the fighting tactics she knows tomorrow, maybe if she offers to help you with dinner tomorrow you could let her? And actually try and talk to her if you do - we’re a team and Aang seems to already loves her so we could try and do the same?”

Katara thought to herself for a moment before nodding at her brother, wondering what she could even talk to their new companion about given the opportunity.

As they made their way back to the campfire, Aang laughed at how happy his new friend was at winning their game, even if he was surprised in her victory - he had never lost at that game before, but there was always a first time for everything and maybe if she was happy about this she’d start feeling more welcome in the group. He may have been the youngest here but he could still see how tense the others were around each other and he wanted to fix it.

———

Dinner that night was a quiet affair, everyone just happy to not having their lives threatened or experiencing something insane for once, and instead just enjoying the quiet world around them. Once they had finished, Katara got up to start clearing everything away, and when y/n offered her help, there was a small moment of hesitation before she nodded at her, taking Sokka’s advice of trying to give her a chance.

Y/n was pleased when Katara allowed her to help, sitting next to her when she used her water bending to clean the dishes and y/n dried them up. It would’ve been even quicker if she could have used her fire bending to dry the dishes but she was still not ready to reveal that bit of herself.

As they finished their task Katara turned to her, “Um, I was wondering why your nickname was Lia? If it’s alright to ask?”

She smiled at the water bender, “Yeah of course. It started with my mum actually, my favourite flower was always the camellia flower, so she’d always call me ‘her little camellia’, and then enough people heard it and started calling me Lia, or Little Lia at the time,” she smiled at the memories of the people who loved her and who she had lost, “But yeah after a while Lia just stuck and it makes me feel closer to my mum I guess.”

Katara had felt enough pain at her own mother dying that she recognised the glassy look in y/n’s eyes as she recalled her mum, and she felt herself softening towards the older girl, reaching out she squeezed the Fire Nation girl’s shoulder, “I understand, since my mum died I’ve worn her necklace to feel closer to her. It’s the small things I guess.”

Y/n nodded at the girl, giving her a shy smile, “The small things.”

Feeling some of the tension between the pair dissipate, they both made their way back to where the boys were sitting feeling slightly lighter, Momo launching himself at his new favourite member as soon as they were sat down, cherishing the warmth her body emitted as a fire bender.

It didn’t take long until the events of the past few days caught up with the group and they all fell asleep, the embers of the fire casting a small glow over their campsite.

———

Sokka woke up with a groan, he had never been a morning person and living on the road with the constantly happy and chatty Avatar was something that he suspected he’d never get used to. Not to mention their new companion was somehow always awake early as well and would also chat to said boy - it was all just a lot in the mornings. He looked over to the Avatar himself and witnessed him trying to flirt with his sister in his own weird way, somehow getting her to agree to go exploring with him for the day.

That left him with y/n for the day, and he was hoping to ask her to teach him some combat skills, if he actually got the nerves to ask. He’d already been impressed with her skill with a blade on numerous occasions and even if just a few months ago he would’ve turned his nose up at her teaching him anything due to the fact she was a girl, his time with Suki had started changing his mind then and he’d since been proven wrong multiple times. So all he had to do was ask, that wouldn’t be so hard would it?

It turned out it was that hard. He was being ridiculous he knew but as he watched her practice her forms next to the stream - the perfect time to him to ask for some pointers, he was well aware of this - he just couldn’t bring himself to ask.

So instead he watched. She looked calm as she went through her movements, the sun shining on her dark curls, as she span and lunged with no weapon in her hand, a true warrior even with no sword in her hand. He hated to admit, especially because he knew he should be wary of her, but he was starting to admire her, not just for her skills in combat but she was already good friends with Aang and maybe even starting to gain Katara’s trust if their relaxed attitude towards each other last night was any indication - and that in itself was nothing short of a miracle. But other than that she was pretty. She was really pretty, and Sokka couldn’t help but notice it anytime the firelight danced in her eyes or she laughed at one of Aang’s dumb jokes, or sometimes his dumb jokes, and it was beginning to annoy him. Why after everything, after Yue, did he start thinking a Fire Nation girl was pretty? It was stupid and he shook himself out of his thoughts and started walking towards her before he could psyche himself out of his plan.

“Hi,” y/n opened her eyes and raised a questioning eyebrow at the Water Tribe boy who had interrupted her morning forms, “I, um, was wondering, if you’d be able to teach me some sword skills or something I don’t know - it’s just I feel like I need to know more than just my trusty boomerang and you are you know, um, really good with a sword and you could help me? Maybe, if you want, if you don’t want to you don’t have to. Please stop me from talking.”

She couldn’t help but laugh a little at how flustered he had gotten trying to ask her for help - it was kinda cute and she smiled as he avoided her eyes.

“I can teach you somethings if you want, although can’t say I’ll be a good teacher, if you get hurt I’m not taking the blame when Katara gets annoyed at us.” She joked, pleased with herself when Sokka gave her a hopeful smile.

“Yeah I would like that, and don’t you worry my sister knows I’m to blame in any and all accidents, she’s had practice dealing with me for years.”

“Okay well we can start off with the basic defensive forms if that’s alright with you?” He nodded at her, glad he’d gotten over himself and asked - hopefully if he learnt a lot from her over time he’d no longer feel useless when Team Avatar found themselves in dangerous situations.

They went over the numerous defence stances for hours until the sun was at the highest point in the sky and they declared it was time to have a break, both of them lying down on the hard ground, a comfortable silence enveloping between themselves.

Y/n was busy thinking about how she’d initially been taught her combat skills to better help Sokka when her thoughts were interrupted by the older boy himself.

“You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to, but I’ve been thinking about that dumb swamp, and was wondering what was it you saw when we were in there? Again you don’t have to answer if I’m being too nosey.”

She turned to look at him, making eye contact briefly before she lay on her back once again, debating whether she wanted to talk about it or not.

Silence stretched between them, and just as Sokka thought he had been too inconsiderate in his questioning, she spoke.

“I saw my mother.”

She could feel Sokka tense slightly beside her before facing her fully, her eyes remained on the sky above her, the clouds moving across it in various shapes, calming her down.

“She died a few years ago now, there was this illness in our city, it claimed a lot of lives but that didn’t make it any less painful when I lost her I guess, and my father-“ she took in a sharp breath at the thought of him, “none of us took it well and seeing her in that swamp, I just wasn’t ready for it.”

Sokka watched as she wiped a stray tear with her hand and was getting ready to say something to her before she continued speaking.

“But that wasn’t the worst of it. I… I touched her shoulder so I could see her face for the first time in so long, I wanted to make sure I still remembered it you know? But when she turned around it wasn’t her anymore.”

There were lots of tears falling down her cheeks now, as she remembered what she’d seen, but she continued telling the silent boy beside her, hoping that talking about it would make things easier.

“Instead of my mother it was a man who I… hurt a few years ago. It’s the thing I’m most ashamed of and it was why I left the Fire Nation actually, it’s just seeing his face and remembering what I did, even though at the time I didn’t want to, it was just too much.”

She sniffed turned to look at Sokka again, scared but curious as to how he would react to her admission, even if it wasn’t a full admission, but she needed to know that he didn’t suddenly hate her.

He leant over and wiped a tear of the cheek closest to him, “Thank you, for telling me, I’m not sure it’ll make you feel better but the person I’ve learnt you to be is not someone who would willingly hurt others, so to me, you’re not a bad person, and this does not change that opinion at all.”

She hiccuped, feeling a small weight off her shoulders even if he did not know the whole story he didn’t think she was a monster and that was enough for now. She went to reply to him when their moment was broken by the arrival of Aang and Katara from their little adventure, happily chatting away and asking about lunch. Y/n gave Sokka one last smile, wiped away the rest of her tears and went to greet Aang, trying to listen to him whilst he spoke about a mile a minute about the animals they’d seen.

———

That night, after dinner had been eaten and cleared up, there was, for the first time since y/n had joined the group, a nice and relaxed atmosphere surrounding the group and it stayed that way until they departed their small campsite the next day. Their break was over and now the hunt for Aang’s earth bending teacher was back on the schedule.

taglist: @kaylove12 @bestyearsof5sos @neemonroe @aangsupremacy @ladylizzieofdarbyshire @lizziel1410 @idalinette @jasminedrgon @avocados-and-lemons @chewymoustachio @http-jackass @theamandaaashow @plutoneu

strikethrough means i couldnt tag you - also because it’s been so long, if you no longer want to be tagged you can just ask :)

#sokkas-sword #flickers series #sokka x reader #Avatar The Last Airbender #atla #atla fic #sokka x y/n #sokka x you #katara #katara of the southern water tribe #sokka #sokka of the southern water tribe #aang #avatar aang #sokka fic #zuko x reader

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spaceyaceface · 2 years

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Steve Harrington comforting a reader who is insecure about their stretch marks like he invited them to a pool day but they dont want to go bc of their insecurity? I couldn't find a list with your boundaries/stuff you won write so if this crosses them I am sorry

A/N: As someone with a lot of stretch marks, I def feel this one!!! It's taken me a while to get used to them!

Pairing: Steve Harrington x gn!reader (no pronouns used, but references to wearing a swimsuit/bikini)

Warnings: Body insecurity (stretch marks)

Steve had been pestering you about the swim party for a couple of weeks now. It was something the whole group had been planning for a while; snacks were assigned to various people, rides were cordinated, and schedules were cleared for the day. It was a big deal for all of them.

And you didn't know how to say that you didn't really want to go.

The whole concept of the swim party seemed fun--enticing, even--but there was one simple fact that kept you so hesitant.

Having to wear a swimsuit.

So when Steve brought up the party to you again today, you struggled to find a response.

"Y/N, did you hear me?"

Your eyes shot up to look at him over the counter of Family Video. "Yeah, yeah. The party. You said you'd pick me up."

"At seven."

"At seven," you repeated quietly.

He noticed something in your tone. It had been a couple of months since the two of you had gotten together--a couple of wonderful, laughter-filled and magical months--and in that time he'd gotten a lot better at reading you. "Is... that ok?"

You nodded a little too quickly.

He sighed, shaking his head and leaning against his hands against the counter so that he was closer to you. "What's bothering you? Every time I bring up the party, you tense up. You don't have to go if you don't want to."

"I want to go, really, I just..." You bit your lip. "It's stupid."

He walked around the counter, coming to stand by you. "If it's enough to get you worried, it's not stupid."

A sigh escaped your lips as you looked down at the counter in front of you. "I don't know. I usually avoid swimming, because, well, I don't like wearing swimsuits or bikinis or all that--"

"Babe," Steve said. "You're gorgeous. I'm sure it would look great on you."

You blushed, but continued. "It's not even that. I have, you know, stretch marks, and..." You trailed off, thought dying in your throat. "It sounds stupid."

Steve placed his hands on your shoulders to gently turn you toward him. “Hey,” he said softly. “That doesn’t sound stupid.”

Hesitantly, your eyes met his. “No?”

“Nope. I’ve got scars now, too. Can’t help being a little self conscious about them.”

You chuckled a bit. “Yeah, but yours are from fighting flying bat demons in an alternate hell dimension. That’s cool.”

“And yours are from you growing and becoming who you are today.” He wrapped his arms around you, bringing you closer so that your noses brushed against each other. “Pretty cool if you ask me,” he said with a grin. He pressed a soft kiss to your lips.

You smiled back at him. “Thanks, Steve.”

“You really don’t have to come if you don’t want to. I get it. Or you can come and not swim. Whatever you want. But the kids will sure miss you, and I’ll miss you even more.” He left a kiss on your forehead.

---------

In the end, you decided to go. After wrestling with it in your mind for the next couple of days, you decided that the fun might distract you enough from your insecurities. Steve was elated when he heard your decision, stealing a few kisses in his excitement and lifting you off your feet until Robin yelled at him that you two were gross.

Friday came, and you waited by the door. You’d found a pair of swimming shorts that offered a bit more coverage, and had elected to wear them. You tried not to worry about the voices in your head making you question it. Were people going to ask you why you were wearing them? Would they stare?

But then Steve was at the door, telling you you were beautiful and holding your hand as you walked to the car. And the worries seemed a lot smaller.

At the pool, the party was already in full swing. Dustin and Mike were practically attacking each other in the water, while Nancy and Robin sunbathed on some chairs. Everyone excitedly shouted hellos and welcomes to you and Steve, and then they went on with their play. You raised a hand to block the splash as Eddie did a cannonball into the pool and laughed.

You turned to see Steve smiling at you, just having taken off his shirt. You glanced down at the scars on his sides, and he shrugged

A grin stretched across your face. “Still pretty cool.” He laughed, and suddenly he charged, picking you up and throwing you into the pool.

The rest of the night was full of joyful screams and shouts, splashing and battling in the water. And you didn’t think about the marks on your skin for a second of it.

At some point, you caught a glance at Steve staring at you, a grin wider than the sky on his face. The look in his eyes was absolutely adoring.

You were glad you came, after all.

#steve harrington x reader #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington blurb #steve harrington request #steve harrington drabble #fluff #stretch marks #body insecurity tw #comfort fic #stranger things #stranger things fanfiction #i never know what to tag #idk i hope yall find this #i think it's cute

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the-trans-dragon · 7 months

Text

Healthcare is just like "Well our system doesn't have an option to scan both areas so we have to input it as two scans, so that's why it's twice as expensive," and "Let me print you off a list of supplements to try," and "Hmm well, lets try some extra fiber for now and schedule a follow up in a couple weeks," like is that really the best option or do you just want me to pay for another appointment, and "No, doctors dont usually look at the scans, they just read the radiologist's notes," and "You want a copy of your results? Oh...okay... Uh... let me go...get a CD and put the results on it for you..." and "You're having what symptoms? Oh, sorry, I can't help you with that, I'm not a surgeon. Who should you go see? I don't know, a surgeon?" like can you at least recommend one or send a referral (he did not), and "No, there's side effects," and "You need to go to the emergency room if you have those side effects," and [learns more about my health from a 1985 research article than I have learned from any doctor; found a similar article that was published four months ago but it thinks it's normal to charge $39.99 for 15 minutes access] and [it's my responsibility to find a place to get testing done even though I have no idea who to call, and I don't know if the place charging $600 is any better than the place charging $450 but they did seem more knowledgeable over the phone but that was just a 5 minute phone call, and even if they're lower quality, it might be worth it to save enough money to save enough money to cover half of the price for a doctor visit] and [desperately decides to send a short polite professional email to the author of a research paper to ask about their work because research articles have historically been more helpful than doctors and at this rate I might as well learn all I can because I'm frustrated enough to think that maybe getting a medical technician degree or something might be cheaper and faster than approaching healthcare as a non-medical-professional] and "Sorry we haven't gotten that prescription yet, but we'll text you when it comes in" and "Sorry, there's a national shortage, but we do have [similar medicine but it costs 10-30x as much, though it DOES work a lot better, which you got to learn briefly when you had health insurance which brought the price down to about 2-3x as much as the cheaper version] if you want to ask your doctor about it [and thus paying for another doctor appointment also]" and "Incorrect email or password, please try again," and "Incorrect email or password, please try again," and "Incorrect email or password, please try again," and "Incorrect email or password, please try again," and "Incorrect email or password, please try again," and "Incorrect email or password, please try again," and "Hello, I'm calling to see if the doctor ever got back to you. No? Okay, sorry about that, let me go see if he has a moment. You should get a call from him shortly," and I'm.

Tired.

#sorenhoots

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kasaneteto · 4 months

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sorry i simply must complain for a moment

ive been complaining about my roommate too much on instagram so im doing it here instead 🖕 fuck you

MOTHERFUCKER CANNOT TAKE CARE OF HIMSELF!!!! tell me why this man is turning 26 NEXT WEEK and can’t remember to pay me back for the bills. won’t do any chores unless he’s asked to or HE has friends coming over. i literally feel like im living with a teenager.

i’ve recently realized just how much ive coddled him and made excuses for him because of his mental health struggles and the way his parents treated him his whole life. ive also realized that its entirely up to him to recognize that his mental health struggles & trauma are HIS problems to deal with and i shouldnt have to temper my expectations because of that. i can only tell him he needs therapy so many times before it’ll just go in one ear and out the other like every other thing i say to him. he is so incapable of any kind of self-reflection or self-awareness, has no concept of how his actions might affect others, can’t make any compromises without throwing a fucking tantrum about it. it’s exhausting. he requires so much attention and validation in order to be happy. being in the same room is like an invitation to talk to him. AND HE SAYS THE SAME SHIT. its like ive exhausted all dialogue options. he always makes the same stupid jokes that are just *goofy or purposefully obnoxious comment about what im doing* and i DONT have the energy to entertain that shit every day. but it RUINS his mood if you dont partake in his humor and then he just sulks. he cannot be serious. everything is jokey goofy fun time. when finn and i told him she’s trans & that we broke up his response was just to stare at us like a deer in headlights and go “oh. okay. sorry thats just a lot to process” which is like. just such a perfect prime example of how he cannot handle anything serious or heavy. when he got cheated on he was inconsolable and would not leave finn and i alone (and we wanted to help!!! we care about him!!!) he literally would follow us to our room and we would have to ask him for alone time!!!! he’s like a baby!!!! he’s so deadset on finding a new partner and i just wanna scream in his face NO RELATIONSHIP YOURE IN WILL EVER WORK IUT UNTIL YOU WORK ON YOURSELF AND UNPACK YOUR TRAUMA!!!!!!

he always uses money as an excuse like “ohhh i cant afford it” motherfucker. you can’t afford anything that isnt something you want. so you cant afford to pay me bills on time but you can afford a new monitor for cyber monday? you can’t afford therapy but you can afford to get a shitty fake christmas tree because THATS what’s important to you? he lives so fucking hedonistically and acts like he lives paycheck to paycheck when he makes 22 DOLLARS AN HOUR. MOTHERFUCKER YOU MAKE MORE THAN ME. YOU CAN FUCKING AFFORD IT YOU JUST DONT BUDGET OR SAVE AT ALL.

ok sorry i had to get that shit out because im so frustrated with him. i had a party the other night and he just sulked around until his friends came, hung out with them and only them the whole time, then continued to sulk and complain once they left. then sat around scrolling on his phone while my friends helped me clean everything up. my friends who actually are responsible and arent just in their own world with no consideration for others.

its not like he’s a bad person or even a bad friend because he truly isn’t. he’s just so emotionally immature and does not have the strength to look inward & realize that he is the source of most of his unhappiness in his life currently. its really hard to live around given the stage of my life im currently in.

i wish i could tell him all of this to be honest but hes so fucking sensitive. i HAVE tried to talk to him about a lot of these issues too (him needing to he asked to do chores, not paying me back etc) and its always the same thing. he gets better for a couple months but it quickly goes back to how it was before. im just like so done acting like his problems are mine. done asking him for favors. i hate that living with him has made me lose so much respect for him (he has no moral backbone) because like. i can see that he wants to be better. he just isnt strong enough to admit that hes the problem in his life right now. anyways. thanks for reading this if you did lol

#txt #wow sorry i had a lot more to say about this than i thought i did

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bunnychargebolt · 5 months

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I don’t see my sa therapist for another couple weeks and Im having a time tonight so you guys get me ranting here again (everyone should actually feel free to ignore this completely. Its just helpful writing shit out)

Cw/Tw for detailed mentions of Sexual Assault

I don’t remember many times that I knew I actually wanted to do sexual things with my ex. And even less than that is the times they actually asked me if what they were doing was ok. I think that happened maybe twice. We were together for a year and a half. Sexual shit started happening around five months into the relationship. Which means in the span of over a year I remember them asking for consent like twice.

When stuff first started happening I remember being anxious. We would make out in the back seat of the car and they started rubbing me over my pants. I wasn’t ready for it. I was insecure.

Throughout my entire life my consent has been overlooked. Sexually speaking that started happening when I was about 14. My first in person sexual experience was at 16. With a guy who was 26. I wasn’t old enough to legally consent.

That didnt matter.

I learned from a young age that saying no wasnt really an option. Especially if my opinion wasnt asked for.

I talked to them about all of this. Before we even got together.

That didn’t matter.

I dont know if I ever truly wanted to do any of the stuff I did with my ex. And I had tried talking to them about it.

For at least the last six months of our relationship- every time we had sex (which was roughly about once a week) wed have to stop because Id have one of two breakdowns. The first one being that I didnt know if I actually wanted this or if Im making myself because I think im supposed to. The second one being that I feel like im not allowed to say no.

That didnt matter.

When we had to stop because my joints were out of place and I was in so much pain that I was about to start sobbing they simply suggested we try another position. I didn’t want to let them down so I attempted. I couldn’t do it. I was so insecure and anxious about what they wanted that I was on the verge of having a panic attack.

That didn’t matter.

I remember coming over to their house once. They dragged me into their room and pushed me onto their bed. They said “this is going to happen one way or another so we might as well get it over with”.

I remember having a conversation with them, telling them that I dont want to have sex with them every time I come over. Their response was “It’s hard not to have sex with you. We only see each other once a week”

I remember wanting to take a nap with them. They got on top of me and started kissing me. I tried to pretend I was still asleep. But because i had very briefly mentioned somnophilia to them before they wouldnt stop. Wed never had an actual discussion about it. I never consented to that.

I remember them being on top of le while we were making out and me stopping and saying “i dont know if I want this”. They continued anyways.

I remember having a conversation with them about how they trample over me saying no when I dont want to talk about something. They responded by saying theres a general rule they follow for themself. “Id rather do something and be told it was wrong afterwards than ask for permission first”

I remember not being able to do things for them like give them a blow job or a hand job because I wasmt physically up to it. Between my joints and my acid reflux I couldnt do it. They would get upset. They would bring up how they would do stuff to me but I wont do stuff to them.

I didn’t want what they were doing to me. It was physically damaging for me to do stuff for them.

None of that ever mattered.

I didn’t matter.

I was a chore to get done so they could have something to dangle over my head to obligate me to do stuff for them.

I remember them pressuring me into shower sex. I didn’t want to do it. Some of their family was home. I cant stand in showers for that long. I had to sit down. They still had me give them a blow job.

I remember being in my shower with them. Literally crying. Saying I dont want to be touched. And them still continuing to bite my ear which is something they only ever do sexually.

I remember trying to physically pull away from them so many times.

I remember wanting to be loved.

I remember wanting to feel pretty.

I remember feeling like I had to have sex with them.

I remember everything and nothing at the same time.

I remember allowing all of my boundaries to be trampled over while doing everything I could, to the point of putting my physical well being on the line, to make them feel comfortable.

I remember never getting complimented.

I remember not being like anyone else they showed interest in.

I can still feel them on me.

I can still hear them in my ear.

I can feel them in my home.

My safe places are completely gone.

I remember realizing all of this after breaking up with them.

I remember the fear when I found out someone told them what I shared.

I remember shaking while filing a police report.

I still feel the fear of what theyd do if they found out. What theyll do if I ever run into them.

I still feel unsafe driving near where they live.

I still feel them on me.

I’ve considered trying to scratch my skin off. Maybe then that feeling would go away. But I know that won’t help.

I was uncomfortable. I was in pain. I was crying. I was trying to get away.

I never actually said no though.

“I don’t understand anything other than a firm no” they said close to our break up.

I never said no.

I never pushed them away.

I never really fought back.

But anyone else would have seen me. Desperately wanting to get away. Face contorted in pain. Unable to walk. Unable to dress myself. Clearly uncomfortable. Hearing my hesitance.

No one would have heard me say yes. Because I never did. They never asked.

I remember reading about how your skin is different every 7 years because of the cells you shed. Im not waiting 7 years to get rid of them.

I started getting help. Im going to continue getting help. Im never going to stop speaking up. Sexually assaulting me is just one of many horrible things they did. Yes this fucked me up. But this is on the bottom of my priority list when I tell people what they did.

Im not the only ex to say they assaulted me. And I don’t think I’ll be the last. But I know that ex wont be from the people Im close to. Because they listened when I talked. They told me how bad things were. They watched me break during the relationship. And they helped put me back together when I needed it most.

And now after all that, i find solace in the littlest of things. Yes they assaulted me, but I faked my orgasms. Yes they cheated on me, but they never actually got any bitches.

Its important to find those things. Im going to continue finding more.

Im really happy that after that relationship I get to be me again, even if I have a couple new cracks.

#tw vent #tw sa #tw abuse #sa recovery #here are mh silly little thoughts #idek if this all makes sense #brain just kept saying words #theyre all there now #this also isnt all of the stuff they did in this category😭#theres #so much #sobs

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