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writemywaytoyourheart · 4 years

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Onsra- Chapter 27: Inner Demons

banner created by: @envity ♥️

Pairing: vampire!jungkook x female reader (also vamp!tae x ga-in oc & vamp!jimin x yuri oc)

Genre: romance, angst, horror, drama

Warnings for this chapter: panic attack, strong language, koo is being bullied by that stupid voice again ;-;

Word count: 7.7k

Onsra- ML, Previous Next

I loved this one at first, now idk :/ hope u enjoy it tho :’)

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You’re staring into Taehyung’s deep brown eyes, your own wider than ever. His irises are so dark they’re almost black.

“What is it?” Tae repeats his words, he’s so confused he doesn’t know what to think. “Why are you guys staring at me?” He asks desperately. You try to find the words to explain but Jungkook cuts you off sharply before you can.

“Open your mouth.” He says abruptly, taking all three of you by surprise. Taehyung looks at Jungkook like he’s insane. “Why would I do that? What the heck is the matter with you guys? Ga-In?” He looks at her, desperation and anxiety in his eyes. Ga-In has tears in her own and she tries to explain when Jungkook once again snaps.

“Open your damn mouth, Tae.”

The older boy looks at him indignantly, then opens his mouth hesitantly. You and Ga-In gasp and Jungkook’s eyes narrow.

“What is it??” Tae is almost shouting now, his frustration hitting a breaking point.

“You’re a human again.”

Tae steps back when Jungkook utters those words. The shock on his face is clear, and he stumbles for a second. “W-what the hell are you talking about?” He whispers breathlessly, his eyes darting around the three of you watching him.

“Your eyes are brown, Tae. They aren’t red anymore.” You speak up quietly, tying to help him understand. Jungkook nods and joins in. “You don’t have fangs anymore either. Look at your hands, your color is coming back.”

Taehyung brings his shaking hands in front of his face, his eyes widen and start to water as he stares at them. “W-why- why am I like this?” He splutters, then Ga-In wraps her arms around him and hugs him tightly. Tae responds immediately by encircling her in his own hold, he stuffs his face into her hair and lets out a little sob.

“I d-don’t understand.” He cries when Ga-In pulls away. “It’s okay Tae, we’re gonna figure this out. Let’s go to Jin.” Ga-In gets his attention by putting her hand on his cheek and making him look at her, then she grasps his hand and starts leading the confused boy back to the house.

You stare after them in complete and utter shock, the flowers hanging limply and forgotten in your hands. You turn to Jungkook and see him scowling as he stares at the ground.

“What happened to him?”

He doesn’t answer, just keeps focusing on a random rock on the forest floor. You walk closer to him and touch his shoulder, making him flinch.

“Kook? Are you okay?” You ask softly.

Jungkook brushes your hand off and his scowl deepens. “I don’t know what the fuck happened.” He moves past you and starts heading to the house. “And don’t call me that.”

~ ~ ~

You’re afraid to follow Jungkook inside at first, knowing he’s in one of his moods again. But you want to know what Seokjin is going to say about Taehyung, so you walk in and find Tae sitting on the couch, bouncing his legs anxiously. No one else is in the room.

Just then, Ga-In rushes in with the eldest and hurries over to Tae. She sits down next to him and lets him grab her hand tightly and hold it to his chest.

Jin stops abruptly when he sees the pretty blonde boy with his big dark eyes sitting on the couch. His eyes bulge out of his head and he splutters in confusion. “W-w-what happened? What’s going on?”

Taehyung shrugs tearfully, then looks at Ga-In. She seems to understand what he wants from her and she turns to Jin. “Taehyung and I were out having a picnic. When we were finished, we were coming back and saw Jungkook and Y/n. We went to say hi and that’s when we realized something was different.”

“And he was a vampire when you were eating the picnic?” Jin asks slowly. Ga-In nods her head frantically. “Tae said he wasn’t feeling well, so we decided to head back. I didn’t even notice until Jungkook and Y/n noticed.”

Seokjin kneels in front of where Tae is sitting on the couch and puts his hands on the younger boy’s knees to get his attention. “Tae?” The blonde nods, and he continues. “What were you feeling? Did anything happen before you were feeling sick?” Taehyung swallows thickly and keeps his tight grip on Ga-In’s hand. “I- I don’t know. My chest felt kind of tight and it was hard to breathe. It felt kind of like I had run a long time without stopping, my bones were aching and stuff…I feel fine now, though.” You can hear the tears in his voice and your heart aches for him. He must be so confused, like you all are.

Seokjin nods and smiles, “Have you seen yourself?” Tae shakes his head. “Only my hands, I saw that I wasn’t as pale.” He whispers. The eldest holds out his hand to Tae and helps him stand up, “I don’t know what happened, but you’re going to be okay. For some reason, you’re not like the rest of us.” There’s a huge grin on his face as he tells Tae to go and look in the mirror and they can talk more later.

Taehyung pulls Ga-In out of the living room to go with him and you watch them pass by. Seokjin comes over to you, a slight frown on his face. You look at him questioningly and whisper, “What’s wrong? I thought this would be a good thing.”

“Oh no, it is!” Seokjin reassures you. “I’ve just never heard of someone turning back into themselves after being bitten. It just doesn’t happen.” He bites his lip as he thinks. “I feel like there’s something those two aren’t telling us.” You frown at that, knowing Ga-In would never lie to you.

“I don’t know…Why wouldn’t they tell us?” You ask slowly.

Jin shakes his head and shrugs. “I don’t know, but what’s important is that Tae is okay. I guess they’ll let us know when they want to.” You can see tears in his eyes as he glances down the hallway where Taehyung and Ga-In are talking excitedly in the bathroom.

“I’m glad it’s Tae.” He whispers so quietly you barely hear him.

~ ~ ~

The entire house is in an uproar over what happened with Taehyung. Hoseok and Jimin declare that a party needs to be had and Seokjin readily agrees. Tae shyly lets everyone hug him and cry happy tears for him as he grips Ga-In’s hand the whole time. You shed a few tears of your own when you get a turn to hug Tae.

He squeezes you tightly and chuckles at your blubbering.

No one knows what happened, but nobody really cares seeing as Taehyung is a human again, and that’s something they had long since dreamt for. The only one you haven’t seen recently is Jungkook. While everyone is laughing and talking in the living room while Seokjin and Yoongi make dinner, you sneak upstairs to see if you can find him. You knock on his door, but there’s no response. Just to be sure, you peek your head in and see it’s empty. You frown and walk to your room, just in case he decided to hide somewhere else. When you walk in, it’s empty. But something on the dresser catches your eye. You walk over and see a tiny little vase, covered with dust and a little crack down the side of it. The little hairline fracture is so thin that no water is spilling out of it.

Stuffed inside of the little vase are all the flowers that Jungkook was holding for you. They look almost comical because of how many are shoved in. You feel a smile tug at the corner of your mouth and a little tear in your heart at his kind gesture. You wish you knew where he was so you could thank him and make sure he’s okay.

You make your way back downstairs and head to the kitchen. Jin notices you lingering in the archway leading to the kitchen and smiles at you. “Hey, Y/n. Can I help you?” He asks kindly and you shyly make your way over to him. Yoongi is quietly cutting vegetables while the oldest is cooking meat in a pan. “I was just wondering if you’ve seen Jungkook recently.” You say as casually as you can.

Jin sets his tongs down and looks thoughtful for a moment before answering. “I saw him before Ga-In grabbed me to see Tae. He was asking me if I had a vase.” He chuckles and shakes his head. “I have no idea why he wanted a vase, but he was delighted when I found him one. Anyway, I haven’t seen him since then.” Jin takes the tongs and flips the meat again. “Did you need to talk to him?”

You shake your head and sigh. “Not really, thanks Jin.” He smiles at you and you send Yoongi a quick smile before heading out to the living room again. Jimin is playing a card game with Taehyung and Namjoon while Yuri, Ga-In and Hoseok talk on the couch.

“Ga-In?” She looks up when you call her, then she immediately smiles brightly. “Yeah?” You walk over and talk quietly, “Can I speak to you?” She nods and stands up to follow you upstairs.

When you shut the bedroom door, you turn and sit on the bed with Ga-In. “Did something happen, at the picnic I mean?” Ga-In’s cheeks immediately flush pink and you squint at her. “Something did happen! I knew it.”

Your best friend ducks her head and puts her hands over her face. “Y/n, I was going to tell you. I just wanted to do it when we were alone.”

You scoot back on the bed and sit crisscross as you face her. “Well, we’re alone now.”

She peeks at you from between her fingers, seeing you watch her closely. Then she mumbles something that you can’t hear. “What? Ga-In, speak up girl!” She puts her hands down and sighs, her face a tomato red.

“I kissed him, ok??”

Your eyes bug out and you clap a hand over your mouth. “You…kissed him? You kissed him?” Not that there was anything wrong with that, you were just so shocked that she made the move first. Ga-In has never kissed anyone in her life, and she’s definitely not one to make a first move.

Wait a minute.

“Your first kiss!” You squeal and Ga-In covers your mouth quickly, “Shh!! Yes, yes I know.” Her cheeks are so flushed she looks almost feverish. “Mmfhs.”

“What?”

You point at her hand covering your mouth and she realizes what you mean, moving her hand so you can speak. “I knew you liked him, I just didn’t expect-“ Then something clicks in your head and you look at her. “Ga-In…do you love Tae?”

She turns and shoves her face into the mattress, curling her long legs up and forming into a little ball of embarrassment. Then she nods, still hiding her face. “I was too embarrassed to tell you. But he just understands me, and I understand him.” She mumbles into the covers. “He’s so pure and has the biggest heart. Everyone always called me weird for the way I see the world and he never did. We could talk about things and I never felt judged. The more time I spent with him, the more I fell for him.”

You watch her tearfully, extremely happy for her and not knowing how to say it.

“He was shocked today when I told him I liked him, like really liked him. He said it first but wasn’t expecting anything back. I kissed him and-“

She sits up before she can finish, her hair in her face as she tries to brush it away. Her brows are furrowed like she’s thinking really hard, then her eyes widen. “I kissed him and a minute later he told me his chest was hurting.” Your breath catches in your throat and you see the wheels turning in her head.

“Oh my gosh!” She jumps off the bed and runs for the door, you following hot on her heels as she runs down the stairs two at a time. Ga-In flies into the living room and crashes right into Taehyung who was coming out to find you two. He laughs and holds her waist gently, “Wow there, what’s going on?”

“Tae, I think I know what happened.” She says breathlessly. Tae watches her face closely, his brows furrowed. “What do you mean?” Ga-In pulls him away to talk privately in another room, so you turn to go into the living room, knowing she’ll explain everything to you later. That’s when you see Jungkook standing there in the hall by the front door. Your heart leaps to your throat and you grasp your chest.

“You need to stop scaring me like that. Hey, are you okay?” You notice he looks a bit sickly, but he just nods. “I’m okay. I’m fine.” Then he turns to go upstairs.

“Wait, Jungkook.” He turns back at your words.

“You should talk to Tae.”

“Why?”

Why? What the hell does he mean why?

“Um…because he’s had quite the eventful day? I’m sure he’d like to see you.”

“No thanks.” He turns to go up the stairs and you sigh.

“Hey.”

Jungkook stops again at the tone in your voice. You walk over and catch his gaze, “Will you take a walk with me?” He hesitates for only a moment, then he gives you a stiff nod.

~ ~ ~

“Thank you for the vase for my flowers, Jungkook.” You walk beside him slowly as you two make a wide lap around the house. He mumbles something but you don't catch it. The sky is starting to darken, and a few twinkling stars are out. "What's wrong with you?" You ask. Jungkook gently kicks a little stone and shrugs, but you’re not having it. You stop in your place, making him halt and face you.

“Knock it off. I know something is going on. How can you claim to be friends with me when you don’t tell me anything? That isn’t what friends do, you know.” You huff, watching him sigh and clench his fists, unclenching them before he makes eye contact with you.

“I’m just having a rough day.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know, Y/n! Because I am? Because everyone does? Am I not allowed to just be upset? I’m a fucking human bei-“

He cuts himself off, eyes darting to the ground as the new silence surrounds you after he realizes his mistake. You frown and fight the urge to hug him. He just sighs and puts his hand over his eyes.

“I’m just not feeling my best right now.” He whispers.

“Ok, I’m sorry.” You say softly, then you ask. “Do you want to be alone? Because if you do, it’s all right. I’ll leave you alone.” He hesitates, then nods. You sigh internally and walk over to him, wrapping your arms around him and giving him a quick hug. Jungkook flinches at your action, then he tries to make himself relax. He’s about to hug you back, but you pull away a second later.

“Talk later?” You ask hopefully and he nods, trying to give you a smile.

He watches you make your way back into the house, his chest tightening painfully.

She’s really something, huh?

Jungkook just sighs and stares at the door after you close it. His mind is too tired to deal with this right now.

Too bad she’s the only one feeling anything.

“What do you know?” Jungkook snaps angrily, giving in to the taunts.

I know you’re pathetic.

“Fuck off.”

Think about it, boy. Why would Taehyung turn back and not you?

“I don’t care.” Jungkook’s voice wavers.

It’s because you’re too far gone.

“You don’t know everything,”

Oh, but this…I do know.

“Why are you messing with me?” Jungkook kicks another rock, watching it roll away a few feet.

Because it’s fun.

“Just go away.”

You know it doesn’t work that way.

You know why, right?

“Shut up.”

No.

You’re a monster, and you know it.

“Nope.”

Y/n knows it.

“Don’t say her name.” Jungkook growls, trying to keep his cool. But he knows nothing he says or does will make it shut up.

Monster.

“Stop.”

You think she could ever love something like you?

You drink blood, boy.

You’re disgusting.

Jungkook sighs and wills the tears to go away. He doesn’t want to cry, not now.

Oh, is the little boy crying now?

Maybe you do have feelings!

“Why? Why can’t you leave me alone?” Jungkook sniffles and wipes his nose angrily.

You know why.

“No.”

Because I’m you.

You can’t escape yourself.

“You’re not. Go away.”

Oh yeah? Make me then.

…

See?

You can’t.

Jungkook plops onto the ground and pulls his knees up to his chest. He wraps his arms around his legs and hugs himself tightly. “Please stop.” He sighs shakily, already feeling new tears streaming down his face.

You’re a nobody.

“Please.”

She secretly hates you.

After everything you’ve done to her?

Jungkook gasps in a breath, trying to choke back the tears. He wipes his eyes frantically, then clutches his legs again.

You’re a burden to them all.

“No, I’m not.”

They know you’re a lost cause.

Don’t you realize how different you are from them?

“Just stop!” Jungkook screams, plugging his ears and rocking back and forth. “Please stop!” His cries get louder. His whole chest is tight, and he can’t get a breath in.

Monster.

“I’m not a monster.” He whimpers brokenly.

Oh, come on now.

You killed innocent animals and drank their blood.

Jungkook chokes on his tears and continues to rock back and forth on the ground where he sits.

You drank the blood of a man.

“He hurt Y/n.” Jungkook whispers tearfully.

Do you think she cares enough to condone you drinking his blood like a monster?

“Not a monster.” More tears stream down.

Yes, you are.

“No. No no no.” Jungkook just keeps repeating it out loud, attempting to drown out the voice.

Just accept it.

Accept it and I’ll leave you alone.

Jungkook keeps rocking, squeezing his eyes shut tight and mumbling nonsense to himself.

You’re evil.

Disgusting.

And you’ll always be alone.

The young vampire curls into himself and lies on the ground, his knees still tucked into his side, he lets the tears tickle his nose as they slide down the bridge of it. His broken sobs can’t be heard by anyone but himself. Because he’s all alone. And he always will be.

~ ~ ~

You beat everyone in yet another round of Go Fish, laughing your head off when they all stare at you in disbelief. “I guess I’m just the queen of this game.” You say smugly, earning another playful glare from Yoongi.

Hoseok starts reshuffling the cards again for another game when the front door opens. You hear heavy footsteps going up the stairs and excuse yourself from the next round. Making your way out of the living room, you see Jungkook climbing the stairs slowly.

“Hey, Jungkook.”

You follow him up the stairs, but he keeps walking without answering you as he goes down the hall. “Y/n, I don’t really want to talk right now.” He says once he reaches his room and stops in front of it.

“I don’t believe you.” You respond quietly, watching his face.

Jungkook tries to keep a neutral expression, but you looking at him with so much understanding and kindness makes him break. A single tear slips out and trails down his cheek and you watch with mounting sadness. “Jungkook, please just let me try to understand.” He sighs and looks at you uncertainly. You continue softly, “If you don’t give me a chance, I can’t help you.”

Jungkook opens his door and walks in, but he doesn’t close it. You take that as a sign to follow him, so you walk in behind him. He sits on the floor by his bed and leans his back against it. You shut the door behind you before walking over and sitting on the floor beside him.

Silence fills the room, but you decide not to break it. He’ll talk when he’s ready, you think hopefully as you curl your legs up to hug them against you.

“I’m sorry.” He speaks up after a little while. You turn your head and see him staring at the closed door, his eyes a bit vacant. “Jungkook, you already apologized, and I already forgave you. Please stop beating yourself up.”

He shakes his head and sniffles, wiping his nose with the sleeve of his jacket as he continuously stares straight ahead. “Why are you being so nice to me?” He asks after another minute of silence. You turn your head back and join him in staring at the door.

“Because I don’t believe you’re really bad.” You say softly. “I think you want me to believe you are. I think you want people to hate you, I just don’t know why.”

You hear a little sniffle come from Jungkook again and you shift to face him. He pulls his knees up to his chest and stuffs his face into them. His shoulders shake as he takes shaky breaths and tries to stop crying.

He doesn’t know what’s going on. He doesn’t understand it. There are so many feelings swirling around inside of him that he has long since forgotten. The person he used to be is like a figment of his imagination, all blurry and distant in the deepest part of his untouched memories. He never realized that he was pushing everyone away. He was trying to make people hate him. He just didn’t know it until you said it.

Now it feels like a part of the person he’s become and is so used to, is being chipped away at. And he doesn’t know how he feels about that. The whole time, being angry and hateful towards everyone and everything felt natural, and comfortable, and predictable. It was always something he felt he could control when everything else was taken from him. Now you’ve broken through that façade and confused him even further.

“I’m so- I don't get it.” He chokes out, his voice a bit muffled from stuffing it into the space between his knees and arms.

You feel tears prick at your eyes from the vulnerable sound of his voice, and you scoot closer to him. You reach out a tentative hand and pat his back gently, trying to soothe him. “It’s okay to be confused. I can’t imagine what you must be going through right now, and I’m sorry.” You keep your voice low as you pat him on the back. “If you want, I can try to help you understand some things? If you want to just talk about whatever you’re feeling.”

Jungkook lifts his head up and wipes his tears. “You could have done this with any of the others. They were all so much kinder to you, and still are. I don’t understand why you don’t hate me. I never did anything to deserve your friendship.”

You sigh and lay your head on his shoulder, feeling him tense for a second before relaxing again. “Why are you so mean to yourself?” You whisper softly and he looks at you. You look up at him and realize how close your faces are, your noses no more than three inches apart.

“Because I don’t deserve anything more than that.” He speaks lowly and with such raw emotion that you can feel the hurt and anger tangible in the air between you.

“Stop it.” You keep looking into his eyes, noticing them shining with new tears.

“I can’t.” He says slowly, defeat clear in his voice. His eyes move back and forth between yours, searching your gaze and trying to figure out what’s going on in your mind.

“Then let me help you. I want to help you see what I see.” You try to keep your voice clear, but the tears creeping up on you make it hard not to choke.

She’s lying.

“Fuck.” Jungkook whispers softly and closes his eyes, trying not to panic at the horrible timing.

“Tell him to shut up.��

Jungkook’s eyes pop open and he looks at you quizzically. “Who?” His voice breaks. You search his face and then reach your hand up. You unfold his right hand that’s clutching his knee and hold it gently, lacing your fingers between his. Your faces are still only a few inches apart.

“The voice in your head.”

Jungkook’s gaze is locked on your hand that’s gripping his, a million overwhelming feelings fighting for his attention. “How did you-“ He furrows his brows at you, confusion clouding his mind. He has no idea how you know about the voice. Maybe you heard it too?

She doesn’t hear me, stupid.

She’s trying to make you trust her.

“Whatever he’s telling you, it isn’t true.”

She’s smart. She knows how to play you.

“But, how did you know?” Jungkook asks again. You shrug and move back a little before answering him. “I’ve heard you say random things to yourself when we talk. Sometimes even when you aren’t talking to anyone. You always sound frustrated and anxious when it happens.”

She thinks you’re crazy.

“I- I’m not crazy…” Jungkook mumbles and looks down. You frown and squeeze his hand a little, “I don’t think you’re crazy, Jungkook.”

He looks back at you and you think you see a little shimmer of hope glistening in his eyes. Then it fades away a moment later.

I wonder who’s playing who now?

Karma, hm?

“I’m going to prove it to you.” You speak up suddenly and he glances at you uncertainly. “Prove what to me?” He asks hesitantly.

“That I care about you and I’m not lying. You watch me, I’ll show you Jeon Jungkook.”

He chuckles a little and wipes his eyes with the hand you’re not holding. “How did you know my last name?” You giggle and sit back, still holding his hand. “I’m just magical like that, ya know.” You say smugly and he laughs louder this time. “Seokjin hyung told you, didn’t he?”

“He did.” You grin and Jungkook feels another pull in his chest at the sight.

How sweet. What a waste of blood. Shame, it would be so delicious.

Jungkook doesn’t pay any heed to the taunting, he just cleans his face up of the tears and smiles brightly at you. This is the happiest you’ve ever seen him. You fight the sudden urge to kiss him on the cheek. Instead, you give his hand another little squeeze and rest your head against the side of his bed.

“So, what do you like to do for fun?” You ask and he sighs. “I don’t really know.” You look back at him doubtfully, “There has to be something you enjoy. Anything, anything at all.” You insist.

“Well...” Jungkook hesitates, then he sees you nod encouragingly, and he continues. “Well, I kind of remember things I used to enjoy, but I haven’t done them in a long time.”

“Name one.”

“I don’t really want to talk about it, though.” He says quietly, and you can hear the sadness in his voice. So, you automatically switch gears. “Ok, that’s fine. Let’s talk about something else.”

“Like what?”

“I don’t know. Say a random word.” You rest your head back again and wait for him to say something. It’s quiet for a minute before Jungkook awkwardly speaks up again. “I’m not good at this.”

You laugh quietly and nod, your eyes closed as you think of something. “That’s alright. Let’s see now…umm, animal. What’s your favorite animal?”

Silence follows, then Jungkook mumbles, “I don’t know…”

You can’t help but start chuckling again. Your giggles get louder and soon Jungkook joins in. In a few minutes, you’re rolling around on the ground and laughing your head off about literally nothing while Jungkook stays leaned against the bed, laughing with you. When you finally sit up and wipe away the mirthful tears on your face, you see Jungkook giggling and notice his sharp canines. At first, they scared you, now you find them cute.

Jungkook seems to notice where you’re looking and snaps his mouth shut. “Hey, no!” You protest and get up on your knees to shuffle towards him. “Don’t close your mouth.” You pout and he glares at you playfully before sticking his tongue out.

You grab his cheeks and squish them, making his lips pooch out. You laugh and he starts giggling too, then he reaches up and takes your hands from his face, holding them in his larger ones. You’ve gotten used to how cold his skin is by now. Jungkook smiles at you and your heart does a little flip in your chest. You shake your head and try to free your hands to squish his cheeks again, but he keeps a grip on them.

“Let me goo~” You whine and stand up, trying to yank your hands free from his grasp. Jungkook just stands up along with you and giggles at the way you move around and try to break free. “Calm down, noodle arms.” He says and you glare at him playfully.

“You’re a big old bully, let me go.” You try to spin out of his grip but end up tripping on his foot and stumbling. You fall onto his bed and Jungkook, who still has your wrists, falls on top of you. He made sure to catch himself, so he didn’t crush you, but you immediately notice the close proximity. Jungkook gulps and stares at you, his nose mere centimeters from your own.

You see him glance down at your lips and your heart starts pounding out of your chest. You can feel his breath fanning your face, your own coming out in panicked little puffs of air.

Just then a knock on the door makes you both jump; Jungkook flings himself backwards and off of you and you quickly move to a sitting position on the edge of his bed.

“W-who…W-who is it?” Jungkook stutters and you try not to laugh at the expression on his face. It’s somewhere between panic and annoyance.

“Your favorite oldest brother ever, that’s who.”

Jungkook sighs and moves to open the door to a grinning Seokjin.

“Well hello there, Kook. What are you two up to?” You can hear the playful smirk in his voice even though you can’t see him past Jungkook. You roll your eyes and see Jungkook’s shoulders sag, “Hyung.” He almost whines and you cover your mouth to stifle your laughter.

You get up and peek out from behind the vampire, seeing Jin winking at Jungkook before his focus turns to you. “Hey, Y/n. Is Jungkook misbehaving?” He asks, teasing the younger vampire that sighs in annoyance.

“He certainly is. Good thing you came to save me.” You pipe up and slip under Jungkook’s arm that’s propped on the door. You slide out of the room and Jungkook’s face falls. “You better scold him, Jin.” You say before turning and winking at Jungkook from behind the eldest.

“Yah, if you don’t stop messing with Y/n, I’ll have your hide boy.” Jin shakes his finger in Jungkook’s face and laughs at the expression he receives in return. Jungkook’s lips form a thin line and he scowls, “We were just talking hyung.”

Seokjin smacks Jungkook’s shoulder playfully and laughs his signature windshield wiper laugh. “We heard you idiots laughing from downstairs, don’t think you can have all the fun without me. That isn’t why I came up though.” He turns back to you. “Y/n, I wanted to talk with you.”

~ ~ ~

“Taehyung said they might know why he turned back.” Jin says as he sits on the couch in the living room. You take a seat next to him and nod. “Ga-In had an idea, but she hasn’t clarified anything with me yet. Do you know where they are?” You ask curiously and Jin nods, “Yeah, they’re up in Tae’s room. This whole thing is really confusing.” He mutters, lost in thought.

You nod in agreement. How can he turn back into a human just because Ga-In kissed him? This isn’t some fairytale…

Then again, if someone had asked you if you believed in vampires a few months ago, you would’ve laughed it off. And now look where you are. But the whole thing still seems odd and very confusing.

“Well, I just wanted to make sure you knew about what they were saying.” Jin says after a minute of silence. “Thank you Jin, I appreciate it.” He nods, then he seems to remember something and turns to you again. “How’s Jungkook doing? He seemed like he was having a good time with you.” You smile, then it disappears when you start to worry again.

“He keeps switching. One minute he’ll talk to me, and the next he’ll act like I don’t even exist. I don’t know what to think.” You say slowly, making Jin nod, “Let’s just keep an eye on him and make sure he’s doing all right. I’m worried about the human blood he drank. I can’t imagine why he didn’t turn, but I’m really grateful.” Jin gets that lost look in his eyes again and you sigh sadly.

“I wish he would talk to me.” Jin mumbles and you pat his shoulder comfortingly. You don’t know how he deals with it, honestly. Losing his youngest brother and watching him become less like his old self, starting to hate his brothers more and more each day. It would take a toll on anyone.

“I feel like he might be getting somewhere. Just give him some time, I’m sure he’ll come around.” You try to comfort him, but you don’t think your words will help much at this point. After another few minutes of silence, Jin announces he’s going to bed. You stay on the couch a while longer, listening to the rain outside that started falling a few minutes ago.

A sound coming from the hall makes you flinch and look up, seeing Taehyung smiling at you as he quietly walks into the living room.

“Hey, Y/n.”

“Hey.” You smile at him as he comes to sit next to you. It’s such an odd sight to see him without his pale skin and red eyes, and his little fangs appearing when he speaks. He just looks so…normal. And happy. It makes your heart warm to see him smiling so brightly since earlier.

“How are you feeling?” You ask quietly, aware that the others are heading to bed.

“I feel amazing. I was terrified earlier, but I feel so much better now.” You can hear the smile in his voice and you grin at him. “I’m so happy for you, Tae.”

“Thank you.” His boxy smile appears again and he looks down shyly. “It feels kind of weird, though. I need to get used to everything again.” You nod in understanding, then something comes into your mind and you turn to ask him.

“So, after your chest started hurting and it felt like you couldn’t breathe, your heartbeat came back? Just a little while after Ga-In kissed you?” At first his cheeks redden at your words, and he ducks his head. Then you see him lift it, his brows furrowed in confusion.

“Wait, what?”

You look at him as he turns to you again, “Wait, did you say my heartbeat?” You nod slowly, confused as to why he doesn’t understand your question.

“I’m sorry, I’m confused.” He thinks hard for a minute then looks at you again, his deep brown eyes squinted in thought. “I never lost my heartbeat to begin with, Y/n.” He says slowly, trying to make you understand.

What?

Your blood runs cold at this and you stare at him in shock, “W-what do you mean? After you were bitten, you guys-…you lost your heartbeats, didn’t you?” Tae can sense the anxiety behind your words as he shakes his head.

“No, we didn’t. I don’t know where you got that idea.” Tae seems genuinely bewildered. “I mean, I know we turned into vampires. But when a human turns, they don’t lose their heartbeat, because they aren’t dead. Real vampires have no heartbeat because they aren’t exactly living to begin with.”

Your breath quickens the longer he talks and Tae notices how fidgety you’re becoming. He reaches out a hand to touch your shoulder and bring you back. “Y/n, are you feeling all right? What’s going on?”

“I- I don’t know. I- I think I’m going to puke.” You say breathlessly, holding your stomach as it turns and twists horribly.

Taehyung helps you off the couch and leads you to the bathroom where you crouch by the toilet and take deep breaths. “Would you like me to get Jin? He can get some medicine for you if you’re sick.” Tae is standing above you, biting his lip in worry.

“N-no I’m okay. I think I’m just tired.” You say quietly, trying your hardest not to retch at the new realization you’ve come to. You sit with your head in your hands for a few minutes, trying to calm down and process everything in a rational manner. Taehyung sits on the floor beside you, silently comforting you with his presence.

You finally open your eyes and nod at him, “I’m okay now, thank you Tae.” He helps you stand and walks closely behind as you make your way up the stairs. “Are you sure you’re all right, Y/n?” He asks quietly when you reach your room.

You nod and whisper a quick goodnight to him as you open the door and go to the big bed. Yuri and Ga-In are already fast asleep as you crawl in between them and close your eyes. Plugging your ears and willing yourself to go to sleep, even though you know it’ll only result in more nightmares if you end up drifting off.

~ ~ ~

“Jeon Jungkook! Get your butt up, what are still doing in bed?”

Jungkook flinches and peels his eyes open tiredly. He finds you at his door with your hands on your hips and a scowl on your face. He groans and puts his hands over his eyes.

“Why are you in here?”

“You scared me. I thought you had left forever.”

Jungkook lifts his hands and squints at you again, confusion painting his pretty features. “What the hell are you talking about, Y/n?”

You pout and cross your arms. “You weren’t waiting on the porch for me after breakfast and you weren’t anywhere outside. I didn’t even think to check your room. Why are you still in bed?”

Jungkook drops his head back on his pillow and sighs. “I just wanted to sleep in is all. What’s the big deal, anyway?”

You walk over and yank his covers off, startling him and making him flinch. You realize he’s still in the t-shirt and jeans he wore yesterday. “What the hell?” He groans and sits up, still squinting in your direction. You lay the covers at the foot of his bed and gesture for him to get up.

“Come on, I’m taking you out today.” You say matter-of-factly and open the blinds to let some light in.

Jungkook looks at you in surprise, then he hisses and gestures towards the window. “Don’t open ‘em. Close them please.” You frown at that but close them again anyway. “Sorry. Well, come on! Get up. I’ll meet you on the porch.”

“You’re one lucky son of a gun, you know.” Jungkook mutters as he ruffles his bed head and moves his legs off the side of his bed.

“Why is that?” You ask nonchalantly as you make your way back to his door to leave.

Jungkook smirks at you and you feel goosebumps break out on your arms, hating the effect he still has on you. He stands up and saunters over to you, reaching his arm around you and opening the door to let you out. Then he whispers, “Because I usually don’t sleep with all my clothes on.”

Your face bursts into flames at the realization of how lucky you actually are that he fell asleep in his clothes last night. The thought of what would have happened had that not been the case makes you want to curl into a ball and die. You can’t look him in the eyes as you stutter. “S-sorry, I- uh-…m-meet me outside when you’re ready!”

Then you run out of the room and down the hall towards the stairs, hearing Jungkook’s low chuckle as he watches you scurry away.

You’re talking with Jin on the couch when Jungkook walks down the stairs, all ready to go wherever you’re taking him. You smile at him, already having forgotten the humiliating scene from a little while ago.

“You ready to go?” You ask cheerily and see Jungkook nod shyly before looking at the ground. “Where are we going?” He asks quietly.

“I’m taking you kids to the store.” Seokjin says from behind you before you can answer. He jingles the keys in his hand and grins as Jungkook just makes a confused face.

“What?”

“Jin is taking us food shopping.” You smile brightly. “He said we need some stuff and there’s a place he always goes. We’ll have to make it quick though, since things aren’t very safe these days.”

Jungkook frowns, disappointment seeping into his mind that he won’t get to spend time alone with you. “That doesn’t sound very exciting.” He mutters as you nudge him in the side. “Oh, cheer up, that isn’t all we’re doing.” You scold his attitude as you three make your way to the little blue van.

“Who wants the front?” Jin asks, unlocking the doors and hopping into the driver’s seat. You two stand there quietly and Jin looks back out at you. “Well don’t everyone jump at once.” He says sarcastically.

“Ah, you can have the front Kook. I’ll sit in the middle.” You climb into the middle section and start buckling. You look up in surprise when he slides in next to you and buckles up silently. Seokjin shrugs and winks at you through the rearview mirror before starting the car.

You and Jin make pleasant conversation on the ride through the woods, but Jungkook stays quiet no matter how many times you try to include him. Eventually you and the eldest are all tired out from talking and everyone falls into a comfortable silence. Jin had told you it would be a long drive, so you settle down and watch out the window. The blur of trees gets dizzying pretty quickly, so you start looking at the clouds in the sky through the branches.

Jungkook sits perfectly still, watching you look out the window. He tries to memorize the lines of your face and the curve of your nose and chin. The shape of your lips as you mumble song lyrics to yourself quietly. He looks down and sees your hand resting in your lap. Then he has a very strong sudden urge to reach over and take your hand in his. His hand twitches, dying to just touch yours and feel how soft and warm it is compared to his.

When you abruptly turn and look at him to say something, he jumps out of his skin, whipping his head to face the front and willing himself not to panic that you caught him staring.

Cute.

You think as you look at him blinking frantically as he stares at the back of Jin’s head.

A two-hour drive later, you’re shocked to see actual buildings and cars. It feels strange and unsafe almost, being here after so long. Jin pulls into a parking spot in a crowded lot of a grocery store. You see people walking here and there, minding their own business and going about their days. Seokjin turns around in his seat and tosses a hoodie back to you. Him and Jungkook are already wearing them.

“If anyone at all recognizes you, it won’t be good.” Jin says as you pull it over your head and push your arms through. You put the hood up and take the face mask that Jin hands you.

“Don’t act weird, just be normal. It’s pretty easy to blend in if you act like you know what you’re doing.”

You nod and see Jungkook put some sunglasses on, keeping his hood off. He still looks a bit too pale but you’re sure no one is going to question him, seeing as he could just be a fair-skinned person.

The three of you make your way inside and Jin tells you he’ll meet you at the checkout in an hour. You and Jungkook stand there cluelessly, not knowing where to go. You glance at him and chuckle, causing him to look at you and tilt his head. “What’s so funny?” He asks and you laugh again. “It’s not very natural to have sunglasses on inside.” You whisper teasingly and he rolls his eyes, but you don’t see it.

“Oh, my bad. Let me just take them off and go stare at someone till they notice my fucking gorgeous ass eyes.” He says sarcastically, making you laugh and cover his mouth. “Don’t be stupid, Kook. Keep your voice down.” You glare at him playfully and uncover his mouth. “That doesn’t even make sense, why would you just walk over and stare at some stranger?” You giggle and follow him as he takes off in a random direction.

You two wander around aimlessly before heading to the toy section after you take the lead. Jungkook groans when you run over to a stand of little stuffed animals. “Oh, look!” You squeal and grab a teddy bear, laughing and showing it to him. Jungkook smothers the smile creeping up on him and shakes his head, “The toys? Really, Y/n?”

You glare at him and set the bear down, “Well, you didn’t have any better ideas to pass the time, Jungkook.”

“Jungkook?”

A sharp whisper hisses right after you from somewhere close by, and you jump. Jungkook’s hands immediately move to grab your wrist and pull you closer to him, his head whipping around in all directions to locate the voice.

_____________________________________

a/n: I honestly love parts of this one and hate parts of this one so idek anymore...;-;

tag list: @jjungkook99 @ditttiii @fekitza @xxxanimangxxx @howbizarre @rubinora @lettersforjoon @krystle1990 @karissassirak @mygukandonly @elliegrace1999tvd @nikikookie @adelina1299

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jksmoongf · 5 years

Text

Kissing Fire [pt. 11]

Pairing: Jungkook x reader x girlfriend (oc) Genre: cheater!AU, angst, smut Wordcount: 11.4k Warning: smut, lies, heartbreak and more lies and maybe fluff if you squint

Summary: It always feels like there is only one person in the world to love. And then you find somebody else.

a/n: I don’t condone cheating on your s.o., so please don’t read if you have a problem with this! (also I’m not saying this is something Jungkook would actually do!) **a/n: thank you for your patience, angels! 💗 It’s been a while and I hope anyone still reads this <3 (also idk what happened to the og upload but it was kinda weird -.-) I’m also dedicating this chapter to my sweet @struggleofarmy!!! You helped me so much and without you, I probably wouldn’t have finished it! thank you for everything! 💗 ily Warning chapter 11: none, it’s just an angsty mess!!! (profanities, maybe?)

Jungkook closed the microwave door on the leftover food; her eyes glued to his pretty face as his lips puckered into a kissy-shape, trying to set the temperature and the time before pressing the start button. He turned around, locking eyes with her. “We have exactly 3 minutes and 45 seconds.” He wiggled his brows but a strange feeling of embarrassment washed over her, making her cheeks flush that he caught her staring. “Noona, do I have something on my face?” Jungkook mused, mouth curving upwards into a smile. Shaking her head no, she hoped the color would soon disappear from her face. “So where were we before you said you were hungry?” He closed the distance between them quickly, trapping her between his body and the counter. The warmth that radiated off him as his face got closer and closer with every blink, made her feel all fuzzy as his fingertips gently trailed up her arms, over her shoulders and up her neck until he cupped her face. The pads of his thumbs softly caressing her skin when his lips ghosted over her own. She knew this was supposed to be a sweet and tender moment shared between just the two of them but she just couldn’t help herself. She crashed her lips onto Jungkook’s; feeling the smile tugging on the corners of his mouth while she so desperately tried to get a taste of him. Her hands tangled in his messy dark hair, pulling him closer to her as their tongues gently nestled against each other. He sighed into her mouth when her fingers gently scratched over his scalp. Maybe, just maybe, they could ditch the food and go back to his room for a little while and just indulge in a heavy make-out session where she was sure he wouldn’t be able to keep his hands to himself for more than a few seconds.

But the repeated beeping of the microwave made them separate sooner than expected.

With a groan, she blindly reached for her phone next to the pillow where she had placed it after being on FaceTime with Jungkook just hours ago. She knew that in the morning, she would regret not listening to him when he repeatedly told her to sleep and get plenty of rest before work.

But talking to him was so much more important than sleeping; she just loved listening to him talk about his day, especially after an exciting event like the night before. Sometimes, it scared her that he was often surrounded by pretty girls who were a lot more talented than she was; leaving her to wonder why he had chosen her instead of someone who perfectly understood all his struggles. But at the end of the night he called her to whisper sleepy I love you’s or FaceTime until they both fell asleep.

[Jungkook - 4:12am]

Ah noona, I already miss you! Sleep well and have a good day at work! Text me whenever you can! Can’t wait to see you when your shift is over! I love you (∩˃o˂∩)♡

Her grip tightened around the phone, pressing it to her chest, she kicked her legs and muffled a squeal into the plush bunny he had given her. Jungkook was always so sweet; he must have known how happy it would make her to be waking up to a text from him but after reading the text over and over, her eyes darted to the time on top of the screen.

“Shit! Shit! Shit!” She cursed under her breath, trying to free herself from the confinement of the two blankets and the robe she was wearing. In a hurry she put on her work uniform and got ready to leave, running just a few minutes late.

Shoving the last bite of a banana into her mouth; she put on her denim jacket before slipping on her black patent-leather shoes with the small dainty gold buckle.

As if the devil himself was chasing her down the street, she ran as fast as she could to catch her train to Hongdae and just in time she squeezed through the door right as it was about close, the hem of her skirt almost getting caught.

She leaned against the door on the opposite side, catching a glimpse of her reflection. The wind had caused a few strands of hair to get loose, making her bun look messy. While trying to tuck the hair back to where it belonged, she pulled out her phone, finally having enough time to reply to Jungkook.

[y/n - 10:33 am]

I miss you too, Kookie! My shift ends at 6pm so I can come over after. I’ll bring food for you and the boys! Just let me know what you want, you know I get a discount so don't hold back! I love you too!

[y/n - 10:35M]

Btw, I should have listened to you when you told me to sleep. I’m so tired but also so excited to see you later. I hope you slept well, baby!

After locking the screen, she let her eyes wander around the cart. A group of teenage girls, all gathered around one phone caught her attention.

“Is that really him? It can’t be.” One of them whispered-yelled, immediately covering her mouth with her hands after one of her friends slapped her arm and scolding her.

“Of course it is him. It’s his voice and those are definitely his hands. Haven’t you seen the other one?”

The vibration, signaling a new text, made her flinch at first but her heart started racing, only to be disappointed that it wasn’t Jungkook - just a coworker sending a meme to the group chat. Yet, she went back to his chat, carefully scanning the messages she had sent to him - they had not been delivered yet. Reminding herself that he sometimes put his phone on airplane mode so nobody would disturb his slumber.

Four hours had passed and she was finally on her break, sitting in the small back room where they kept their personal belongings during shifts.

Her heart sank when she saw that Jungkook still had not replied; it was unlike him to keep her waiting for so long. At this hour, he surely wouldn’t still be asleep, not when he had moaned about having to go to a company meeting today. Even her attempts at calling him were left unanswered; the calls going straight to voicemail.

A whirlwind of panic started to stir up in her stomach; what if he changed his mind and didn’t want to see her anymore? The past few days had been so chaotic and draining that she couldn’t silence the small voice in the back of her mind that kept telling her that it was all too good to be true.

Nails clicking on the screen; she hastily pulled up Taehyung’s chat.

[y/n - 2:12pm]

Tae (: do you know where Jungkookie is? I wanted to ask him about editing a pic for me but he’s not responding to my messages. I’ll see you later <3

“Y/n, Myung-Jun hyung says your lunch is ready! Come eat.” With a sigh, she followed her coworker to the kitchen, sitting down at the small table for the restaurant staff. It was odd that she was so worried about Jungkook not replying, but the uneasy feeling that something wasn’t right anchored itself in her chest.

Halfheartedly she picked at the food in front of her; maybe she was overreacting and Jungkook had just forgotten to turn airplane mode off or he left in a rush, leaving his phone at the dorms. Either way, she had her mind set on checking up on him after her shift.

Jungkook’s bare feet made the floor creek as he entered the living room, the hushed conversations he had faintly been hearing on his way, immediately died down. His brothers looking at him like he was a species from a different planet, not one of them looking happy to see him.

“Sit.” Yoongi gestured towards a chair from the kitchen table that they had put out, just for him apparently - making him feel like he was a police interrogation. “Management will be here any minute now.”

Jungkook gave a small nod, sitting down on the wooden chair. He knew the heating was on but the room seemed to be freezing cold when no warm laughter filled the air and every single one of the member's faces seemed to be laced with concern.

“Can I have my phone back?” His eyes were focused on the electronic device on the coffee table, still not understanding why they took it from him to begin with. He just wanted to see if y/n had texted him; maybe talk to her on the phone for a bit during her break- longing to hear her voice and the sweet coos of his nickname. Not talking to her for almost seven hours, seemed like torture to him now that they were finally able to be together and be happy.

“No, we were told not to give it to you.” Seokjin said calmly, his index finger tapping on the armrest of the sofa in a familiar rhythm.

Letting out a frustrated groan, Jungkook rolled his eyes.

“You know I’m not a kid anymore, you can’t just take my stuff from me like you’re my parents.” His bottom lip jutted out into a small pout; contradicting his previous statement perfectly.

“Oh, it is very apparent that you’re not a kid anymore…” Hoseok scoffed under his breath but before Jungkook could answer, he heard the front door open and manager Sejin’s voice echoed from the hallway.

“Change the code and then join us in the living room.”

Jungkook always admired how tall his favorite manager was but the grim expression on his face made his usual soft eyes, dark and a little scary. “Perfect, you’re all here.”

“Taehyung is in his room. I’ll go get him.” Jimin jumped over the back of the sofa and rushed down the corridor.

“Then we’ll wait.” Sejin sat down next to Namjoon, who had been too wrapped up in his thoughts to pay any attention to the things that were happening around him, only snapping out of his thoughts momentarily to mumble a greeting.

Jimin knocked on the door, only seconds later Ha-na’s muffled voice indicated that it was okay for him to come in. At the sight of his best friend sitting cross-legged on the bed, wiping his cheeks with his sleeve, his heart cramped up painfully.

Ha-na had her arm wrapped around her boyfriend’s shoulders, holding his left hand tightly in her own, whispering softly in his ear.

“Management is here to talk to Jungkookie, Sejin-nim wants you to come, too.” He said quietly, when the younger one looked up with puffy eyes, the tip of his nose red from crying.

“I don’t want to…I just want to stay here…” He was about to lie down and pull the duvet over his body when Ha-na stopped him.

“I’ll come with you and if it gets too much, we can just go back to your room, okay, baby?” She said softly, cupping his face, to dim the flow of tears for a second with her thumbs.

“Ha-na, I’m sorry but you can’t come. It’s just…”

She nodded. “No, I get it. Just the group and management.” Pulling Taehyung to his feet, she grabbed Jimin’s wrist. “Just go with Jimin-ah, he’ll make sure you’re doing alright.”

“Of course I will.” Jimin gently took Taehyung’s much larger hand in his, giving it a tight squeeze.

“But I don’t wanna see him…” The hurt in his voice made Jimin’s eyes tear up. A few hours earlier when he had found out from Hoseok what had happened during the night, he knew that Taehyung would take it the hardest - two of the people he was closest to, had been shamelessly lying to his face for months, completely shattering every ounce of trust he used to have in them.

“You can just look at me the entire time, okay?” Ruffling his hair, he finally managed to pull Tae into the living room, where the air felt suffocatingly thick, making it hard to take deep breaths.

“Hyung,” Jungkook addressed Tae who looked like he had been crying. “Is everything okay? What’s wrong?”

Did something happen to Taehyung? Why had he been crying? Jungkook just didn’t understand what was happening; why was nobody telling him why they all looked so worried?

Finally, Sejin cleared his throat - he was sitting closest to Jungkook, resting his elbows on his knees.

“All of you know why we are here…” He addressed the room, while the other members silently nodded, the youngest vehemently shook his head, making the manager adjust his position to face him.

“I’m not here to tell you what to do, the boss wants to speak to you tomorrow in person about all of this. I’m just here to inform you of the next steps we’re going to take.”

“For goodness sake, what have I done?” He asked, feeling the blood in his veins starting to boil out of frustration of being left in the dark.

“You didn’t tell him?”

“N-no, we thought it would be best if you told him…” Namjoon said quietly, not making eye contact with Jungkook, who so desperately needed comfort and reassuring from his older brother.

The leader’s demeanor worried him, Namjoon was usually the first to speak up about any concerns he had - never afraid to voice what was going on in his head to his members. Now that he was keeping quiet; buried underneath a smothering mountain of thoughts, he wasn’t able to handle the situation like he always did.

“Jungkook-ah..” Sejin pulled out his phone, tapping on the screen a few times before handing it to him. “That is you, correct?”

Jungkook’s body turned to stone, his insides twisted in an abundance of knots, uncertain whether he would ever be able to untie them again. Heart hammering against his ribcage; his vision got blurry as he stared at the phone, watching the video he filmed in that hotel room. His own moans blaring from the tiny speaker, repulsed him, forcing bile up his esophagus.

“Jungkook! Ya!” Hoseok snapped his fingers, trying to get the youngest attention when the next video started playing.

“I-I-… h-how?” He muttered, watching himself go down on y/n.

“We don’t know. We have people trying to take the videos down and find out who put them on the internet.” Sejin took the phone from him.

“Once it’s on the internet, you will never be able to take them all down.” Yoongi shook his head, habitually picking at the skin of this thumb.

“Jungkook what were you thinking taking those videos? You know how important your image is. Why would you risk it all?”

“Looks like he wasn’t doing much thinking at all...all the blood his brain needed to make a rational decision was a little further down south...” It seemed like a lighthearted comment, masked a joke but Jungkook knew that Hoseok indeed wasn’t messing around.

He tried hard to swallow the lump in his throat but it just wouldn’t go down.

“I-It was just supposed to be between me and…” For a second, Taehyung’s eyes met his and he just couldn’t bring himself to say her name out loud.

Now he finally knew why one of his best friends had been crying; he had to find out from strangers on the internet that two of his best friends had been slowly ramming a knife into his back. He watched as Jimin pulled Taehyung to his chest, who looked like he was about to burst into tears again.

“Jungkook…”

His brain was slowing down tremendously, not able to form an articulate sentence that would explain the whole situation.

“So you and y/n thought it would be a good idea to take those videos for what reason?” Sejin folded his arms, eyeing the youngest intently over the rims of his glasses.

“Y/n…” He breathed out her name. “How is she? Is she okay? Has anyone talked to her?” Jumping up from the chair, he frantically looked at the other members who suddenly found their knees oddly interesting. “I have to go. I have to talk to her and make sure, she’s okay.”

“Sit down! You’re not going anywhere! The press is waiting outside, it’s been all over the news this morning!”

“W-what?” He slumped down in the chair, his fingers harshly pulling at his own hair. “I have to check on y/n…”

“I’m sorry, Jungkook but that’s not possible.”

“At least let me text her.” He pleaded, tears brimming in his eyes.

“You can’t do that either. We had a meeting in the morning and we can’t let you see her or talk to her again. This concerns the whole group, we cannot risk any more damage to your image. The fans are freaking out, the press is trying to dig up more dirt while asking the company for a statement regarding the videos. You made a whole mess. What were you thinking?”

Jungkook kept quiet under the drilling eyes of the seven men around him. If they reported about it on the news then he was sure his family had seen it too and were worried about him or worse; they had to carry the burden of being ashamed of their son. But he had to push those feelings on the back burner for now.

“I-I wasn’t… it’s just something we did sometimes when we were together.”

“Wait, what about Yina?” Jin chimed in, looking more confused now that the truth was out in the open.

“I broke up with her a few days ago because I love…love y/n.” Subconsciously his fingers started picking at the little fuzz on his cheek, harder than he had ever done it before. Saying it out loud to the people who had always cared for him so deeply, felt so wrong under these circumstances. He wanted them to know that being with her wasn’t a spur of the moment thing. That he didn’t just break up with Yina because y/n seemed more exciting and new - he truly loved her but he felt like they wouldn’t understand.

“When did this all start?”

He focused his eyes on the floor, his ears were feeling hot and redness crept up his face. He didn’t want to tell them, he didn’t want them to know what he had done without any of them knowing. The last thing he wanted was for them to find out and change the way they looked at him. They always doted on him, making sure he was okay and felt loved from a very young age, and he had betrayed them all; the six boys who raised him. Jungkook didn’t want them to think that they failed because he made poor choices along the way.

“Answer the question.” Taehyung’s voice was cold, sending shivers down his spine.

Trying to buy a little more time; he cleared his throat.

“I don’t know the exact date…but it’s been months” He whispered, guilt numbing his senses - at this moment he knew that everything would change; they wouldn’t take care of him anymore, they wouldn’t make sure he was tucked in and had enough to eat during the day. He wasn’t a baby anymore and certainly not the shy teenager they had all grown to love so much.

Telling them made him feel awful like someone had punched him repeatedly in the stomach.

He couldn’t bear the thought of looking at them; their disappointment erecting itself in front of him like a monster that was about to swallow him whole.

Taehyung stood up, his shaking hands balled into fists.

“You disgust me. You two deserve each other.” Pushing past Yoongi, he tried to leave the room but Jungkook jumped up from his seat - he had to fix things, he couldn’t just let him walk out without at least trying to make amends.

“Hyung, please I’m so sorry. Please forgi-..” He tried reaching for the older one’s arm but he crudely swatted his hand away.

“Do.Not.Touch.Me.” His deep voice was laced with venom, Jungkook’s bottom lip quivered when their eyes met, not being used to the tone that was filled with so much disgust, disappointment and hurt. He could see all the pain and anger Taehyung was feeling from being lied to that he just wanted to beg for forgiveness but it was too late.

“Do I have to listen to this shit or can I go?” He turned to face their manager.

“Ya! Taehyungie, don’t swear.” Hoseok immediately disciplined his younger brother but he was ignored.

“Can I go or not?” Taehyung’s eyes were focused on Sejin, who took a deep breath before nodding. “Thanks.” His footsteps echoed loudly in Jungkook’s ears as he felt a tear roll down his cheek. Quickly he wiped it away with a shaking hand; knowing that he had just lost one of his best friends - there was nothing he could say or do that would repair the damage their friendship had suffered.

“So what happens now?” Jimin asked quietly, chewing on the inside of his cheek nervously, the future of the group uncertain.

“Not sure yet.” Sejin furrowed his brows. “We can’t just ignore it and hope for it to go away. We’ll have to wait and see what is being decided on before we make any rushed decisions. But for now, you’ll all have to lay low, especially you.” He looked at the youngest, who looked pitiful in his spot on the chair. “And that means that you will have to cut all ties with y/n.”

Jungkook shook his head; he wasn’t going to leave her, not after everything they had been through together. Not after fighting his inner demons for months to finally be with her, to only have it all taken away from him way too soon.

“Kook, don’t be stubborn! That’s what is best for the group. Do you want all of them to suffer just because you’re being selfish and want to be with a girl? There’s plenty of girls out there, you’ll find another girlfriend in the future.”

He kept quiet, he didn’t have it in him to argue because they wouldn’t understand that he didn’t want anyone else, he wanted her.

“So for now, all codes have been changed and I’m asking all of you to change passwords on your devices as well, just as a precaution. Don’t give out your numbers, we will be changing those as well over the next few days. Security will be increased and we will always have one of the managers here until this all blows over. I know, this is inconvenient but we have to get in control of the situation.” After addressing all of them, he turned to Jungkook again. “I’ll be picking you up at 9 tomorrow morning, the boss will be back from his business trip then.”

“Fine. Can I go to my room now?” Jungkook sounded poutier than he had intended but maybe he could message y/n over on her Instagram to check on her.

“No, but what you can do, is get your laptop so you can change all your passwords. I’m sorry but one of us will have to monitor you, Jungkook.”

He sighed in defeat, slowly dragging his feet towards his room.

Last night had been perfect, they won awards and talking to y/n for hours had been the best ending to the night; he just couldn’t believe that all the good things that finally started happening again, were now overshadowed by someone leaking those videos. He had cherished those videos, they were dear to his heart because it reminded him of one of the reasons why he loved her so much - he never knew what she would do next, it was exciting to be in love with her and he was missing her now more than ever before.

Carrying two bags of food and bottles of soju was more strenuous than she had expected. For a brief moment, she sat them both down to wipe her forehead with the back of her hand before readjusting her mask - the pollution had gotten worse during the day.

As she made her way around the corner, the street was filled with cars and reporters with their mics and cameras ready. Some were trying to talk to one of the security guards which there were many, more than usual.

“Ah, y/n.” The security guard she hadn’t seen since she came here drunk that one night greeted her happily “Bringing over some food, I see.” He closed his eyes, trying to sniff out what she was carrying in the bags.

“Yeah, I just finished work.” She bowed her head.

“I’m sure, they’ll appreciate it. They weren’t able to leave all day with the press blocking the way.”

“I can see that…” She trailed off, letting her eyes wander over the crowd. “Am I allowed to go in?”

“Sure, I haven’t heard otherwise.” She signed her name, as usual, and with a slight bow she continued her journey, walking up the hill to the building.

The increased amount of security made her feel uneasy, feeling like she was being watched every step of the way.

“What do you want?” A man in a suit spat at her before she could even open the door.

“I-I’m just dropping off food for my friends…” Her voice was shaking, making the security guy eye her suspiciously as if she was hiding a weapon in one of the bags.

“And your ‘friends’ know you’re coming?” He raised an eyebrow; she had a feeling that he was about to tackle her to the ground when the regular security guard from the lobby appeared by his side.

“It’s okay, I know her. She’s allowed to come in.”

“Thank you.” She whispered, keeping her head low as she walked past the grim-looking man.

“Crazy day today.” He mused, laying out two lists for her to sign.

“Why two lists?”

“One is for us and one is for them…” He nodded in the direction of the men in suits. “I also have to make a copy of your ID for them. They want to keep track of who is entering the building.”

“That’s fine.” She smiled awkwardly when handing him her card. All those men looking at her like she had done something wrong, made her feel on edge. One of them even followed her into the elevator, not letting her out of his sight until he confirmed with the security on the designated floor that she was allowed to be up here.

She tried entering the code but the all too familiar click of the lock didn’t happen.

Setting the bags down, she tried again. “6-8-1-4-2-7.” She muttered to remind herself of the combination but the small blinking red light told her it wasn’t right.

“Why isn’t it working?” Angrily she stomped her foot in annoyance before knocking on the door impatiently.

A set of footsteps indicated that someone was coming from the other side; she bent down to pick up the bags as the door swung open.

“Finally, did you change the code? I tried to…oh.” She looked up, being faced with the stern look of one of the managers. Hastily she bowed as low as she could without dropping anything. “I’m sorry, hello.”

But he didn’t reply, still just looking at her as if he tried to remember if he had seen her before.

“You need to leave.” His voice was strict, only fueling her confusion.

“But I just got here…”

“Doesn’t matter. You have to go and you cannot come back here.”

“I don’t understand, what’s going on? Why am I not allowed to see my friends?”

“Do yourself a favor and just go. Don’t cause a scene. Please, leave.”

Jungkook was lazily scrolling through his emails when suddenly one caught his eye.

“I got an email that someone logged into my iCloud.” He mumbled, making Hoseok and Jimin look up from their phones.

“Didn't you get the notification on your phone?”

“No…but my phone did ask me to log in again, oddly enough.”

“Hm technology is weird like that sometimes.” Hobi mumbled. “But it’s still kind of odd and you should definitely let someone know so they can look into it.”

"It was on the day I broke up with…” His eyes scanned the mail. “But the login happened hours before.”

“Do you think it was Yina?” Jimin’s eyes were wide in shock. “But how could she have known before you talked to her?”

Jungkook’s teeth dug deep into the soft flesh of his lip - Jimin’s words had struck a nerve.

He had wondered before how she had known where she would find him and y/n. How did she find out? He didn’t make the first move, she had already been there when he came back to the room.

“It says it was in Gangnam…not far away then.” Fingers kneading his chin, nails puncturing his skin, he tried to recall everything that had happened that day.

He had talked to Ha-na and Jimin after practice, remembering how worried y/n had been before they arranged to meet. He had met Yina in the hallway further away from the practice room, near his studio but there was nothing that would have given him away, there had been no sign that she was upset when he saw her that day.

“I don’t think it was her; I know her, she wouldn’t do something like that.”

“You can’t be sure about that, Jungkook. She was hurt and maybe that was her way of seeking revenge after you broke her heart.”

He swallowed hard at Hoseok’s words; as much as he wanted to believe that Yina wouldn’t do this, his brother was right. He brutally ripped out her heart and smashed it into a million pieces. It would only be fair for her to do something equally as bad to him and make him suffer.

He was wishing that there was a way he could get in contact with her, but he was sure that she wouldn’t want to speak to him anyway, not after everything he had put her through.

“Let the managers know, they can look into it.”

He nodded when a sudden knock on the door caught his attention.

“I’ll get it.” Their manager left the kitchen, where he was making a grocery list for a company employee to stuck up the supplies.

“We should order some food, I’m starving.” Jimin groaned, stretching out his arms before rubbing his tummy with a tortured expression on his face. “What do you want to eat? We’ll let you pick Kookie since your day is pretty shit.”

The black-haired boy scoffed. “Thanks but I don’t really feel like eating…”

“Jungkook-ah you need to eat.”

“But I’m not-…” He went quiet, the familiar voice of y/n faintly reaching his ears. “Am I dreaming?” He whispered but his brothers both shook their heads, not moving an inch to avoid making any noise.

“I don’t understand, what’s going on?” Instantly his eyes filled with tears, his heart cracked; she sounded so lost and confused. Too weak to fight the urge, he slowly got up from the couch, fully prepared to Naruto-run past his manager to finally hold her in his arms again. Everything would be so much easier to handle if she was around; they would just go through it together like they always did. Nothing could come between them, not his boss or managers, not his hyungs or even the fans; they were destined to be together and he was willing to fight anyone who tried to keep him away from her.

“What are you doing?”

“I have to see her…”

“Jk! No!” Hobi grabbed his wrist, pulling him back down.

“Please, please, please!” He begged his older brother, trying to persuade him to let him go but he just wouldn’t let go of his wrist, the pressure making his skin tingle.

Hoseok looked at the maknae squirming, trying to wrench his arm from his grasp - his big doe eyes were swimming in tears again, lips quivering trying to hold back from throwing a tantrum.

His heart hurt for his little brother, as much as he condemned his actions and the mess he got them into, he could tell how badly he needed her and deeply in love he was - Jungkook never begged for anything and him begging to see her was all that he needed to ever so lightly loosen the hold he had on his wrist.

“You heard her, hyung! She doesn’t even know what’s happening. I just want to see her, please let me go see her so I can explain it to her. She needs to hear it from me. Please…” Jungkook’s weak voice gave out when he looked up, Taehyung was standing in the doorway, tears streaming down his cheeks at the desperate pleading of his best friend outside the apartment and the manager’s strict orders for her to leave.

“Taehyung-ah.” Jimin leaned over the back of the couch to take his hand, wanting his best friend to know that he wasn’t alone and could seek comfort with him whenever he needed to but before he accomplished his mission, the younger boy had run back down the corridor, slamming the door to his room shut. seeking the comforting arms of his girlfriend.

Only seconds later, Sejin walked into the living room holding two big bags in each hand.

“Here’s some food, can’t let you starve while you’re basically locked in here.” He patted Jungkook’s shoulder, whose face showed no emotion, in order to prevent the breakdown he felt building up inside his chest. Blinking the tears away, his pupils dilated as they scanned the bags on the table. “Y/n brought food over…”

“What?” Hoseok asked, who was already busy pulling all the takeout boxes out to place them neatly on the table for the members to grab.

“Nothing, hyung.” He stood up but didn’t move, eyes still resting on the logo on the bag.

“Funny, it’s all your favorite foods, Jungkookie.” The older boy mused as he inspected the contents of yet another container.

“Yeah, funny. I’ll go get the others.” But he didn’t, instead, he made his way to small bathroom, tightly locking the door behind him. Sitting down on the floor, he pulled his legs up to his chest, wrapping his arms around them.

He didn’t want to cry but the tears kept prodding at the corners of his eyes; her voice still echoing in his mind. She didn’t know what happened, and no one cared enough to tell her; they just cut her off and forced him to do the same. Jungkook didn’t care much about his image at this point, he didn’t care that people had watched those videos - they all had made up their mind about him anyway. All he wanted now was to protect her, to make sure she was okay.

“I’ll have to find a way to talk to her…” He mumbled, resting his forehead against his knees while his fingers traced the engraved silver plate on his wrist. He wouldn’t give up so easily, even if it got him into more trouble.

“Take more, there’s plenty left. Tae needs to eat.” Jimin placed another box on top of the two Ha-na was already holding.

“No, no! I’ll come to get more if we’re still hungry.” She gave the boys a weak smile before heading back to her boyfriend’s room. He refused to leave it, not wanting to see Jungkook sitting amongst the others like a sad little puppy after committing the ultimate betrayal.

Ha-na closed the door with her foot, eyeing her boyfriend as he laid on the bed, hugging his body pillow extra tight, face buried in the tear-stained fabric.

“Tae, I have some food.” She set the boxes down on the small table while he slowly moved into an upright position to inspect the boxes.

“I don’t want it.” He said, lying back down instantly and turning his back towards her. Earlier this morning, he had been a lot more vocal about his pain, giving it a lot more room to breathe. But now he was in a phase where he’d cry and then start mumbling angrily, sometimes boxing the mattress. She pulled the chopsticks from her pocket, taking a seat next to him.

“And why not?”

“Read the fucking label on the box.”

“Choi Go Zip and what is that supposed to tell me?” Ha-na tilted her head in confusion, pushing her bangs from her eyes with the back of her hand. “Somebody from the staff went and got food for all of us. Tae, baby - I know you’re hurting right now but we’re all trying our best in this situation.”

He turned to lay on his back, a scowl playing on his lips. “It’s where y/n works, no staff member went to get the food for us.”

“How do you know?”

“She was here, I heard her talking to Sejin when I went to get water.”

“What?!” Her voice was high pitched, making her boyfriend flinch. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Yes, it does. Did you talk to her?” Taehyung shook his head, crossing his arms over his face.

“No, I didn’t.” He tried hard to sound cold, pretending like he didn’t care but his trembling lips were giving him away.

“Why not?”

“I-I couldn’t stand the thought of looking at her.”

“Oh Tae.” Ha-na laid down next to him, wrapping her arm tightly around his waist. “I know she fucked up, but she is still your best friend. You can’t just leave her hanging like this, baby.”

He shook his head, more tears rolling down his cheeks. “What she did…it’s not what friends do. As far as I’m concerned, she’s not my friend anymore.”

Pulling herself up a little, she pressed soft kisses to his cheeks. “I know, you don’t really mean that.”

“She lied to me, Ha-na” He blubbered, turning his body around in her embrace to bury his face against her chest. “They both did. For months.”

Her fingers gently played with his hair, trying to calm him down, his whole body shaking from the overwhelming amount of emotions that were rushing through him.

“Tae, I told you weeks ago that there was something between them..” She paused, trying to choose her next words very carefully. “Baby your heart is too big for your own good, you always want to believe that people are good, especially your friends. You’re the opposite of the grinch, you feel too much.”

He chuckled against her skin, the vibrations of his deep voice giving her goosebumps.

“You know there will come a time when you’ll need your best friend, nobody can replace her. You have been friends since you were little kids, so please baby, take all the time you need to heal but don’t write her off just yet.”

He didn’t say anything, only inhaling shakingly. She knew he was being stubborn out of anger; being lied to by the people you trust is heartbreaking but he needed time, time to process and sort through his feelings - eventually he would come around, he loved y/n too much to just drop the friend who had stuck by his side for so many years. But then again, she wasn’t going to force him to talk to her if he didn’t feel ready to face her, he would know when the time was right to take a step towards mending the broken friendship.

“How am I supposed to ever trust them again?” He croaked; her arms around him tightening, afraid she might crush him.

“Baby I don’t know and you won’t know until you decide you’re ready to speak to them.”

Ha-na opened her eyes, taking a few seconds to realize that she had fallen asleep trying to comfort her boyfriend, who was now sleeping soundly snuggled up against her side. Irritated by the repeated buzzing noise coming from the nightstand, she blindly reached for the phone - it was Taehyung’s. She pressed the home button, a picture of herself staring back at her that he had taken by the river a few weeks ago.

y/n - 8 missed calls

y/n - 13 messages Maybe it was wrong and maybe he would be mad at her for doing this but she quickly entered his passcode to unlock the phone and check the unread messages.

[y/n - 7:05pm] Tae, what’s going on? Why did your manager sent me away and told me to not come to the dorms anymore? Can you please tell me? Because I don’t understand. 7:45pm Why aren’t you answering me? Are you mad at me? If I did something, can you please tell me?

9:27pm Taehyung? Please talk to me? Ha-na had read enough, feeling bad for the girl she had harbored a lot of bad feelings towards the past weeks when the phone vibrated in her hand again.

Now you’re leaving me on read? What have I done?

She put down Tae’s phone and picked up her own from the side of the bed. She was aware that Taehyung would feel betrayed when he found out what she was about to do but she just wouldn’t be able to live with herself if she kept quiet - leaving y/n in the dark like the rest of them.

[Ha-na - 10:38pm] Y/n, it was me! I read your texts. Can you meet me at Jamwon Hangang Park? At the spot where we took you on your first weekend in Seoul. I’ll explain everything to you.

Carefully she climbed out of bed, making sure Tae was tucked in and hugging his pillow, hoping he wouldn’t wake up while she was gone.

On her way out she passed by Jungkook’s room, through the closed door she could hear a sad song playing, every once in awhile sobs reached her ears. Her heart wrenched in pain; the little one was suffering from the consequences just as much as everyone else. Sometimes Jungkook could be a little naive but he had a good heart and a good head on his shoulders; despite his previous actions. With a sigh, she left the apartment and was greeted with the fluorescent lights in the hallway and a bunch of security guards.

“Where are you going?” One of them inquired.

“Not that it is any of your business but I couldn’t sleep so I’m taking a walk.” To Ha-na’s surprise, he nodded, marking her as absent on a list.

“Be safe, Miss.” He bowed his head, making space for her to get to the elevator.

It was odd to be surrounded by so many people that were just making sure no fans or press would get inside the building; normally the community was a safe place, people couldn’t just get in but BigHit didn’t seem to believe that people weren’t going to try to get in at any cost, whether it was bribing guards or climbing over fences.

Quickly she walked up the stairs that would lead her onto the second level and to the exit closest to her destination.

Ha-na got to the park earlier than expected, for a while she sat on one of the yellow stones by the water, the cool air comfortably expanding in her lungs and clearing her head after being cooped up in Taehyung’s room all day.

This morning when she woke up, she had not expected the day to completely turn upside down the way it did. And although she had taken care of Taehyung all day, she couldn’t possibly fantom how any of the boys were feeling.

Sure, it was hard to see her boyfriend so upset, but not knowing how the whole situation would turn out for them was emotionally draining and nerve-wracking. A feeling of helplessness stirred up inside of her; she really wanted to do something to help but every single idea that popped into her head seemed silly when she gave it a second thought.

Occasionally during the day, she had checked social media just to see what people were saying, and it wasn’t good. She just wanted all of them to stay off the internet while this was going down; the mean and degrading comments towards Jungkook would hurt all of them - he was still their little brother who they loved and adored.

Something told her that she wasn’t the only one thinking that it might have been Yina, who somehow got a hold of these videos and published them to make Jungkook pay for cheating on her for months on end. There was no denying that it sounded reasonable but Ha-na had a gut feeling that this wasn’t the case - Yina once had been someone she would spend time with, especially when the boys were away, and the girl never struck her as someone with malicious intentions; her love for Jungkook was pure - she had not been in it to gain something from him or the people he knew. She pulled her phone from her pocket - she just had to try, maybe this was the one thing she could do to help.

[Ha-na - 11:16pm]

Yina, I hope you’re doing okay, giving the circumstances! I’m sure, you’ve seen what’s happening. I just wanted to ask if you had anything to do with this? I won’t tell anyone, I just need to know.

She puffed up her cheeks; she probably wouldn’t get an answer but she just had to stay positive. No matter what Jungkook had done to her, she knew that deep down Yina was a good person, who might have just acted on an impulse out of anger.

Slowly Ha-na got up, letting her eyes wander up and down the little winding pathway for bikes before crossing it to sit on the bench where she and Tae had taken y/n on her first weekend in Seoul to eat chicken and drink beer while watching the lights of Banpo Bridge. Why did everything have to change? A few months ago things were perfect, everyone was so happy and now careers were ruined and relationships were breaking apart, trust was lost and too many tears were being shed.

It was dark and cold; the wind blowing in her face made her eyes tear up but she had to keep running. Her footsteps echoed loudly on the pavement, as she finally reached the part of the park where the poppy’s bloomed in spring.

“Not far…” Stopping for a few seconds, she rested her hands on her knees, panting heavily. “Just keep going…” Sharply sucking in a breath, she sprinted the rest of the way, where she spotted Ha-na sitting on a bench near the riverbank, lost in thought.

“Sorry, I had to sneak out, my brother was still awake.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Ha-na’s smile was weak, in the darkness the worry that was painted all over her face, made her look incredibly tired. “Come sit.” She patted down on the spot next to her.

“Ha-na…” Almost eerily her name left her mouth, facing her best friend’s girlfriend. “What’s going on? I’m so confused…yesterday everything was fine and now, nobody is talking to me anymore.”

“You really don’t know, huh?”

“Know what?”

“Haven’t you watched the news or were you online at all today?”

She shook her head. “No, I was at work and when I got home, I had to make dinner for my brother and I was kind of preoccupied with being worried about why Jungkook isn’t speaking to me.”

“Y/n…” Ha-na took the inside of her cheek in-between her teeth, letting her eyes wander over the black water of Han River, taking a little while to decide on how to say what she had to tell her. “Someone, we don’t know who… leaked videos of you and Jungkook…”

“What? What videos? Did someone follow us?” Her heart crashed from her chest down into her stomach, chortling awkwardly in the abyss.

“No, the videos you two filmed having sex…”

All the color disappeared from her face; the contents of her stomach wanting to force its way out of her mouth. “No..no…this can't be happening.” Her nails dug into her scalp.

“Y/n, I’m sorry but that’s why Jungkook isn’t talking to you.” Carefully she rested her hand on the other girl’s thigh. “They confiscated his phone and he’s not allowed to contact you. They want to avoid the press finding out more or worse seeing you together.”

“Is he okay?”

“He’s very upset that he can’t see you..” She trailed off, keeping her eyes on the girl next to her, who went silent as tears dripped down her cheeks.

Wrapping her arms loosely around herself, she just stared at her knees wishing that the tears would stop but they didn’t.

“Ha-na, I-I don't know how all of this started…Taehyung introduced me and I was just…head over heels from the start. It was like I didn’t have to search anymore…I found my soulmate…”

Ha-na tilted her head, brows furrowing together; Jungkook had used similar words before to describe how he felt when he saw her. Maybe there was a chance that they both instantly felt a deep connection that couldn’t be explained.

“I really tried to stay away from him, I swear. I didn’t want to get between him and his girlfriend and I know I should have waited until he broke up with her but I was so in love that I just stopped caring about what’s right. I just wanted to be with him and that was all that mattered to me. He promised me so many times that he would break up with her and although he never kept any of them, I still believed him because I just love him so much, more than I’ve ever loved anyone. I didn’t care that it hurt me as long as I had him. I can’t even tell you why we filmed those videos, I know it was stupid but it was all we had when we couldn’t be together and I was the one who initiated it. So it’s all my fault that he is in trouble.” Her hand balled into a fist, before repeatedly hitting against her forehead. “I’m so stupid, I should have known better… stupid, stupid, stupid.” She whined over and over with each word increasing the force of her hand.

“Hey, y/n. Stop that.” Ha-na pulled on her arm, trying to prevent her from hurting herself. “We all know what you two did was wrong but people do stupid things all the time. We can’t turn back time, the damage is done- all we can do now is try to fix th-”

“Tae knows, doesn’t he? That’s why he’s not talking to me.” She blurted out, interrupting Ha-na mid-sentence like she didn’t even listen to any of the words that left her mouth. “I know I was doing something really bad when I had to start lying to my best friend. Oh god.”

“Yes, he knows now and he is really hurt and angry with you, not just with you, with Jungkook too.” She explained, her fingers lacing with y/n’s. “But I’m sure, he will forgive you. You know Tae, he can be stubborn when he gets into his head too much but he always comes around.”

For a little while Ha-na just let her cry, she now had to process what everyone else had tried to do all day.

“Ha-na…” She hiccuped, wiping her cheeks with the sleeve of her jacket. “Do you think I can talk to the company and tell them that I will take all the blame? I’ll tell them that I took one of the videos without him knowing and made him take the second one. I’ll just lie and say I lost my phone and the person who found it, did that to us. I don’t want Jungkook to be upset. It’s all my fault.”

“He would never let you do that, y/n.”

“I know but if you don’t tell him, I can just do it in the morning. I’ll go there right now and wait for someone to show up.”

“And what good would that do, hm?” Ha-na chuckled at the ridiculousness of her words, waiting for an answer but she came up short. “The company is taking care of it. They have people trying to find who did this. You can’t take the fall for it when both of you are responsible.”

“But he worked so hard and I’ve ruined it all.”

Ha-na turned around, grabbing harshly onto her shoulders to force y/n to look at her. “You haven’t ruined it all, stop saying that. If he didn’t want to film those videos, he wouldn’t have done it. Jungkook is not a baby, he knew what you guys were doing was reckless and so unbelievably stupid. Let the company deal with it, in a week nobody will be talking about it; another scandal will pop up and people will forget that Jungkook is a normal human being who has a sex-life. It’s not the end of the world, it will all be fine.” Ha-na heard the words leaving her mouth, but it felt like someone else was saying them. Everything inside her was screaming that it wouldn’t be so easy; that it wouldn’t be forgotten in a week but her heart couldn’t handle seeing the girl in front of her falling apart and wanting to make irrational decisions to protect the boy she loved.

Ha-na checked her phone; it was almost 2 in the morning - tomorrow would be another long day. She stood, facing y/n where their ways would part for the night.

“Promise me, you’ll stay off the internet for a while and take care of yourself.”

Y/n gave her a weak smile. “I promise and you’ll text me if anything happens.”

“Of course, I’ll tell you all about Kookie’s day.” She winked, hugging her extra tight.

“Tell him that I love him, okay?”

“I will.” Watching as she walked away, Ha-na couldn’t shake the bad feeling that was trying gnaw its way into her mind. Y/n was smiling through the pain, trying to be strong because breaking down wasn’t going to make the situation any easier.

Ha-na reached the dorm a little later, after enduring endless security procedures before she could finally get back into bed. Some of the reporters were still prowling the streets around the fenced-in community, hoping they would find any more dirt on the matter.

Slipping off her shoes in the entryway, she quietly tiptoed through the apartment.

“Is he still awake?” She muttered under her breath when she stopped in front of Jungkook’s room, the crack from underneath the door indicating that the lights were still on as well as the music but the sobs had subsided. Quietly she opened the door to find the youngest sleeping on his bed.

“Wasting all this energy.” Shaking her head, she switched off the ceiling light, before turning off the Bluetooth speaker on his nightstand; deciding she’d leave on the fairy lights above the headboard.

Jungkook’s face was puffy from crying himself to sleep, the pillowcase still stained with tears, making her heart feel heavy. She had just wanted for him to do the right thing and now that he had finally done it, karma was lashing out at him - taking away the things he loved. He talked about soulmates and so did y/n, but Ha-na was a strong believer in people getting what they deserved yet she wasn’t sure if karma wasn’t being too harsh on the young boy with the big doe eyes.

She pulled the duvet over his sleeping form, gently stroking his hair as his lashes fluttered at her touch.

“Get some rest, little one.” She whispered, his lips parting in an o-shape as he sighed contently. “Everything will be okay, y/n still loves you.”

Yoongi and the others were sitting at the kitchen table, talking and drinking wine to forget how bad their day had been. The maknae had disappeared into his room after talking to their boss in the morning, wanting to be alone - sending away anyone who tried to comfort him.

“I will never understand, why they thought it was a good idea to film themselves having sex…” Hoseok took a big gulp from his glass. “I thought we taught Jungkookie better than this.”

The leader sighed, rubbing his temples with his fingertips. “They were kissing fire and now we all got burned.”

“What do you mean, hyung?” Jimin asked while pouring more wine for his older brothers.

“I mean, they knew what they were doing was dangerous, -maybe that’s why it was so enticing to them but neither of them stopped to think about the consequences and now we all have to pay. Whether it’s Taehyung being incredibly hurt by his friends lying to him or our image forever being tarnished because of those videos. We all will have to deal with the consequences of someone leaking it. From now on, we will have to be extra careful to ensure our privacy.”

“Who do you think leaked the video?” Jimin was looking at all of them curiously.

“Yina, obviously.” The oldest replied. “Jungkook was cheating on her for months.”

Hoseok nodded. “Yeah, getting cheated on is the worst. I wouldn’t even be mad at her if she did it. If I were in her shoes, I would’ve done the same.”

“All of you should be ashamed! Gossiping like teenage girls.” Ha-na scoffed suddenly, standing in the doorway to the kitchen.

“And you should be ashamed because eavesdropping isn’t nice.”

“I wasn’t but it’s good to know that you think it was Yina when it wasn’t her.”

“How would you know?” Jin had a sour expression on his face.

“Because apparently, I’m the only one who thought of asking her.”

“You talked to Yina?” Jimin stood up so suddenly that his chair tipped over, forcing Yoongi to catch it before it hit the floor.

“I did and it wasn’t her.”

“And you really believe her?”

Yoongi waved his hand, silently telling Jimin to be quiet so Ha-na could speak.

“Yes, she told me she logged into Jungkook’s iCloud to get the proof she needed that he was cheating on her but she did not save the videos nor did she post them online. She said she was too humiliated; she didn’t want anyone to know that her boyfriend cheated on her.”

“Makes sense…”

Ha-na shrugged, grabbing a water bottle from the fridge. “We all have brains, sometimes it’s good to use it so it doesn’t get rusty.” Sticking her tongue out, she nudged Jin’s shoulder on her way back.

It was getting late and Yoongi was loading up the dishwasher before heading to bed himself.

“I’ll never volunteer to do this again.” He quickly wiped a few water stains off the counter before throwing the kitchen towel next to the sink in defeat.

He let his gaze wander around the room before switching the light off, the cold floor making him shiver and wanting to get into his warm, comfy bed as soon as possible when he suddenly heard a knock on the door.

“It’s almost midnight, who….” Yoongi trailed off, waddling to check who had managed to get past security at this hour.

Suspiciously, he opened the door just a bit to see y/n standing there, her shoulders hanging low, eyes swimming in an ocean of tears.

“Y/n, you know I cannot let you in, I’m so sorry.” Saying those words made him feel awful, her lips quivering dangerously.

“Can I at least speak to Taehyung?”

“He doesn’t want to see you right now…” His voice was straining as he denied the girl any form of communication with the two people she needed the most right now.

“Can I see Jungkook? Please, Yoongi, just for a minute…” He wasn’t sure if his tired eyes were playing tricks on him but he swore he saw tears falling from her eyes and hitting the marble tiles.

“I-he will get into trouble if management finds out…”

“You’re right, I don’t want to cause any more trouble for him than I already have.” She let out a choked sob, turning around to leave and Yoongi knew that he was about to do something stupid.

Seeing her being just as shaken up as his little brother was too much for him. He had doubted their love; he didn’t believe in soulmates - he did not think this relationship had a real future after hearing bits and pieces from Jimin. But his heart broke for the girl who so desperately wanted to see the boy she loved that she found a way past security in the middle of the night just to see him.

“Y/n, wait…” He said, stepping away from the door. “Go see him. I don’t know you’re here and I did not open the door for you.”

“Thank you.” She bowed, closing the door behind her.

Yoongi watched her walk up to Jungkook’s room, knocking a few times before he finally opened the door. His eyes grew wide and a gasp escaped his mouth when he realized that it was her and not one of his members bothering him again. Almost instantly he reached for her arm, pulling her into his room; a smile tugged at Yoongi’s lips. Maybe had done the right thing after all.

Jungkook slammed the door shut, his arms tightly wrapping around her- making sure she couldn’t just walk out, not when he needed to hold her so badly. It still felt like he was dreaming, he had lost count of how many times he had imagined seeing her in the last 48 hours. She nestled her face into his soft sweatshirt, inhaling his scent that always seemed to calm her fluttering heart.

After what felt like an eternity, he pulled away only to cup her face. Peppering soft kisses all over her cheeks to erase the tears that felt like acid against his swollen lips.

“I miss you so much, baby.” He mumbled, his lips ghosting over hers, reuniting them in an innocent kiss.

“I miss you too. Not being able to talk to you is the worst.” Her fingers helplessly dug into the soft fabric covering his chest.

“I know…” Rubbing calming circles on her back - he didn’t want to spend the short amount of time they had crying but as much as he tried to hold it together, he couldn’t and neither did she. Uncontrollably the tears kept falling, mixing with sniffles and shallow breaths in between kisses.

“I’m sorry, it’s all my fault this is happening.”

“Noona, no! You know that’s not true.”

“Yes, it is. If I didn’t…” She wept, looking up at him with so much hurt in her eyes that he felt his heart split in two. “It’s my fault…I made you take those videos..” She buried her face against his chest; Jungkook could feel each sob in his bones.

“No one is blaming you! We’re in this together, baby, okay?” His arms locked around her torso as he pressed kisses on top of her head. He was clueless, he didn't know what to say to make her feel better when it all weighed heavy on his mind, preoccupying his every thought and draining every ounce of positivity from his body. There was no magical solution; Sejin had told him to just stick it out for now until people got bored but seeing her cry made it so much more difficult. He just wanted to do something; something that would make all the pain, all the headlines and tears go away so they could be together but there was nothing he could do, other than to hold her, to let her know he would never let her go - not even in the darkest of times.

Suddenly, she pulled away to bring some distance between them. Avoiding his gaze, she focused on the fairy lights, her vision getting blurry. Ha-na had told her not to do anything stupid but she couldn’t help but think that maybe she was the cause of all of this. If she wasn’t in his life then he wouldn’t have to endure the mean comments being made; he would be happy and doing the things he loved without being worried and locked inside this apartment.

She was ruining his career and everything he had worked for - if she wasn’t around things could go back to normal for him. She would be happy to see him happy, even if it was without her around.

“Kookie…” His name fell almost inaudible from her lips. “Everything will be okay, right? Promise me you won’t let those people get to you.”

Jungkook was taken aback, he didn’t quite know what she meant - his brain operating slowly from the lack of sleep and constantly working in overdrive.

“Promise.” He attempted a weak smile to ease her worries but before he could say anything she turned around.

“I should get going before someone finds out I was here…”

“No, please don’t go. Just stay the night.”

“You know that’s not possible.”

Slowly he followed her to the front door, where she finally looked at him with tears in her eyes. He wanted to reach out to hug and kiss her, not knowing when he would see her again but something stopped him.

Her heart was wrenching in pain when she bowed to him. “Be well, Kookie! I hope you have a good life.” Carefully her hand slid into the pocket of her jacket, trembling fingers wrapping around the white gold bangle.

“What?” He asked, panic making his pupils dilate. He didn’t understand - just moments ago she had told him that she missed him. What was happening? He wanted to stand in her way, stop her from leaving but he couldn’t move, his body had turned into stone. Unable to get any part of him to move, he just stood there like a statue even as she reached for his hand, placing the bracelet he had given to her on it.

“Give this to someone who deserves it more than me.” His insides were screaming, nerves desperately tingling to set his legs in motion but it was too late - the door opened and closed. She was gone. His heart silently breaking in his chest; hot streams of tears cascading down his cheeks in disbelief. Where did this short visit go wrong or had it been her plan all along to come to see him and end their relationship when it had just begun?

In trance, he walked through the pitch-black apartment and without knocking into the room where he knew he was still loved. Jimin was lying on his back, furiously hitting the buttons on his Nintendo Switch when Jungkook laid down beside him, burying his face in his older brother's side. “What’s wrong?” “S-she broke up...” He couldn’t bring himself to say it because if he did then there was no going back - he would have lost his soulmate forever.

Taking deep breaths, she hurried past the two security guards and into the stairwell. Cowering down in a corner, she covered her mouth to silence the sobs that were shaking her entire body. He would be better off without her; all those girls were right she was ruining his life and she wasn’t going to let that happen - after all; if you love someone you should set them free if you’re holding them back.

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