#idk this is probably a cry for help but anyway | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

viktortittiforov · 5 months

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i've been blossoming alone over you and i hear my heart breaking do you hear it too? i could stare at your back all day. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - my 1st digital drawing in literal years! funny how the last one i did back in 2016 was also viktuuri. still not over them and never want to be<3

anyways summer of mutual pining lessgooo!!! compensating for the beach episode we never got to experience and only saw glimpses of in the ED. but i'll take them crumbs ✨

#YEEEHAAAAW WE LIVIN BOIS #i am nervous and excited abt this #idk i quite like it even though of course my shading skills are still nonexistent so IMPROVISATION IT IS!#though the perspective and angles are probably all wonky but like shush that's artistic intent ok #if you couldn't tell vitya is supposed to be like. staring at yuuri's back and blushing because he love that boy #IT'S NOT NSFW!!! they are TANNING #well vitya is burning slightly #under the sun AND with the love he feels #i mean that second one applies to yuuri also the pining is requited he is also burning with love #probably thinking how blessed he is that he gets to chill with viktor on the beach #crying internally and probably also blushing. we just cannot see it. he is having a moment. gay ass mf (affectionate)#also don't question his swimming trunks. i wanted them colorful #maybe viktor helped him pick them and insisted he wear them #to highlight and accentuate his ehm. assets.#I STILL MAINTAIN THIS IS A COMPLETELY SFW DRAWING #anyways #viktuuri #yuri on ice #yoi #victuuri #katsuki yuuri #viktor nikiforov #victor nikiforov #yuuri katsuki #spooky draws

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pickled-flowers · 12 days

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Saw some of the grossest parenting today in the bus

#this dad was on his phone the whole bus ride ok #and his two kids were screaming arguing #at most he would periodically tell them to lower their voice while still on his phone #one time he told them to stop the one sitting next to him hit him 😭 and he went back to look at his phone with no reaction #my guy something is seriously wrong with you #your kids are screaming at each other doesn't even matter all that much that we are in the bus rn #theyre not just being loud kids you need to do smt!!!!!! its too early for this!!! i could hear them even with my noise cancelling headphone #anyways #ive never seen smt like this #and i work in a mall i see lots of parents and kids #idk smt really disgusting about a parent just not even interested in engaging with their kids #dude no wonder they're loud they probably want ur attention #also this one lady once who came in wjth a big stroller #and the store where i work has little moving rooms between the aisle so this woman decided TO LEAVE THE STROLLER WITH A KID INSIDE AT THE #FRONT OF THE STORE #the kids started crying and his hrother (toddler not in the stroller but not following the mom for some reason) started exploring and i #i had to watch them until the mom came back but like the woman just left them there???#i just stepped in but what if i hadnt??? lady?????????#i see lots of cute interactions of course #like this little girl who came with who i think is her grandpa and he asked me to help her chose her next manga read 😭💖#i basically work in a book/toy store #theres a lot of candy as well the kids love it #idk i like seeing kids being happy ok it is healing #like all the kids sitting on the floors deep in their books while the parents shop 😭😭😭 makes me smile every time top tier behavior

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larabar · 1 year

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Sonic the Hedgehog and why he's impossible to write Perfectly

(including me i could not get him right if my life depended on it)

is this me giving up on trying to find the perfect way to write him? Maybe

i've been making lots and lots of notes on a bunch of his characterizations and the differences between them, including what makes any of them Better than the others and it's been .inconclusive

but i think ive found the problem. i can't accurately describe him as a character in general in one sentence without getting too specific or listing stuff like 'fast'

and i think that's one of the only things that stays consistent between all the different media he's in

one of my favorite examples of all this is sonic's lack of a solid theme. he has themes, yes. but they change with every game and tend to be the main theme Of the game. not just sonic. so he doesn't really have one of his own like most other characters.

just gonna plug this video again. it talks about sonic leitmotifs and character themes and how they're used to define each character and it's really cool check it out :]

all this comes with a blessing and a curse. there's always someone who will like one characterization and someone else who will Absolutely Despise it. and honestly that's just sonic's thing. especially with sonic media as a whole

there are definitely ways to mess up sonic's character. it's been done many times. but that's when the writers completely dismiss sonic's core values (but let's be honest even those are flexible and everyone still does them differently)

so. if someone has the golden formula to writing sonic please please please i am on my hands and knees i need to know how it's done

but until i figure it out. im just gonna stick to this. ->

TLDR: sonic is so complex and so simple at the same time and i cannot find any one way to describe him. there are infinite ways to write him and it's honestly better to just not worry about getting it perfect and have fun with it :]

#this is actually just a cry for help /j #i dont know how people do it there are so many good versions of this character but theyre all so different !!#but they all work an can be easily identified as Sonic #i think thats why he works so well as a main character without being a silent protagonist like link #he's flexible. he works with literally any story you drop him in #like. ok mild sonic frontiers spoilers #the main cast each has their own koco and they're all different and reflect each character #knux having a warrior amy having .a lover idk. and tails with a mechanic #they all can be matched with a character so easily !#except. sonics just has A Leaf on its head. no fancy stuff. just a standard koco #and!! it works!! somehow skdnfjf #like theres no other koco that would work better #his koco buddy is just kind of A Guy. a guy who loves adventure if you will ajdbd #because thats who sonic is! just a guy who loves adventure! !! theres not much else to it #wxcept hes not just a blank slate he has personality #going back to the twitter takeover question about what sonics memory token would look like and #none if the other characters could come up with a decisive symbol. tails probably had the best idea out of the bunch #a star. because thats what sonic is to him and the others #its; so cut;e man..... ..#um. but anyways. i wrote all this instead of sleeping ahdbfh #if anyone want to add please do i love hearing everyone else's thoughts on this. its the whole point actually #gonna go to bed soon though so. gn #sonic the hedgehog #rambles #gif

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ratgirlcopia · 4 months

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haters will say i have used up all my takes about spillways dancer with white eye. but i still had this one in the back room, it turns out.

#copiaposting #helps that [MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY] came out like. what. a mere month after the spillways video?#anyway idk if this does anything except give me a slightly better reason to go “this blood-crying woman with a white eye represents copia.”#still definitely giving that Movie Reference surface impression but. it's an interesting connection.#if i listened to [MESSAGE] more this probably would have occurred to me earlier.#but i really have no reason to listen to a mini-compilation so i never think about it.

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citrinide · 3 months

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On a soft stupid Sunset shipper note:

#every quiet down it's 'Cin talks about Wheatgel again' time #Finally having updated Wheatley's design from it's last phase is so relieving #becaue now both of them are at a place where im happy with the way they look #and and and. elements of their designs are direct references to each other and.#listen im gay. wheatgel propaganda persists even in the game where you can actively pursue either of them #secret wheatgel ending where you fail so miserably at rizzing them up during their shared event that they just date each other instead /j #i wouldnt be that cruel. (says the man with multiple endings where MC gets... discontinued we'll say <3)#anyway wheatley and nigel are my faves of their respective sets rn and i am sobbing im..im going to put them next to each other #this js me coping hours okay #no time for wheatgel when i have a game to work on. the woes of a single person dev team </3 #this isnt a cry for help btw im fine ive made more progress in the past couple months than i have during the past 5 years #... probably because 4/5 were an indefinite hiatus to focus on school and my mental health erm #and now im doing this kinda shit for a degree! woo! this will be my job or something maybe!#going to start tagging these with sunset.am #sunset.am #since i also call wheatgel Sunset and idk. in case someone wants to filter me ralking about my comfort ship out ig...#or stalk it and like every single one like a freak (affectionate) you choose.#i like talking about them. makes me happy idk.

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best-appliance-tournament · 1 year

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Question before I start doing the appliance polls again (making polls is tedious and a long process and I have my finals this week and I can't even)

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lorisystem · 8 months

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The nicest person in the world is the lady who helped me tie my shoes at 5ish years old so i could go play during recess. (I elaborated in the tags but theyre fairly long,,) -???

#ive already told this story to some people but i love to tell it.#ok so when i was young i only wore velcro shoes bc i couldnt tie laces.#even now i havent learned the proper knot that literally everybody has learned. idk why i just cant commit it to memory but to be fair #i havent tried to learn it in years bc now i learned a different way to tie my shoes which takes longer so everybody is always like why do #you take so long tying your shoes.#but anyway this story is when i was around 5 maybe younger or maybe older but max 7 yrs old.#my mom only bought me velcro shoes since i couldnt learn how to tie my shoes normally and at some point trying to learn made me so #frustrated i just refused to try and cried etc.#so anyway in my old school there was this weird rule ive never seen anywhere else that we had to use other shoes in the class #i guess to avoid dirtying the floors or something.#and one time my mom bought me new shoes with laces and threw my old shoes probably thinking id have to learn it. i didnt lol.#so she tied my shoes in the morning and then i went to school changed shoes and like i had to like. put back my lace shoes on to go outside #for recess. now get that the teacher hated me. not sure why you would hate a child this age. but she was usually mean to me.#so when she saw this issue she was rlly annoyed and told me so and like the first few days she tied my shoes so i could go outside.#and idk after 2 or 3 times she got rlly tired of doing it and said i had to do it by myself. and she just like fucking left and went outside #leaving me alone on the staircase.#and now this building had a 2nd story which was like a house or flat where people lived. and they were totally unrelated to the school afaik #but the lady was always rlly nice. so she happened to be going down to go outside and about her day and she saw me crying by myself on the #staircase and said whats wrong and i told her i cant tie my shoes and she just helped me and consoled me and then i could go.#anyway she was an angel to me.#its hitting me now as i tell this that when i was a child many of the adults around me were really mean #so i really imprinted on nice adults like i thought they were really amazing and the best people ever.#anyway thank you for reading my story!!#lorisys

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gippyworm · 7 months

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Realising why I might feel like absolute shit

#I mean it’s actually because the academic stress makes me want to disappear or at least cry for 10 hours #but forgetting to have my antidepressants probably doesn’t help lol #anyway. still having a bad time #chatterboxing #also gonna clarify bc this might be relatable idk but if my posts are not under a read more they are always fine to rb #now if you’ll excuse me I have some more crying to do #this is also a psa to take ur medication if u have some #don’t forget like I keep doing

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seekingthestars · 11 months

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anyway i just sat here and cried over the state of my cosplays so idk maybe i should just quit trying to finish both before con

#personal #i've been absolutely swamped at work for the past couple of weeks #and all of my free time seems to go to helping fix things around the house or totk #and all i WANT to do is play totk #and this is my fault bc i've had both of these cosplays for a while and i haven't worked on them #that's my fault i've had time to before now i just didn't #but now i'm looking at everything i have to finish and how slowly it's going and how i'm not getting a lot of help #and i just. idk. maybe it's not worth it.#cosplay is supposed to be a fun thing for me and if i'm crying over it maybe i should just stop #or only finish the one that's closest to being done #the con starts on friday like bro i don't have time for this especially if i have to work late again this week #lol i say all of these things and then will probably torture myself into finishing both anyway lololololol

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tardis--dreams · 1 year

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this night is actually going amazing. Started with mild nausea, which developed into strong nausea, which turned into throwing up for the first time in like 4 years (like. A lot of throwing up considering the fact there's literally nothing in my stomach).

Which has led to me turning on the light in my bedroom when i came back from the bathroom. Where I saw one of my favorite creatures on the planet. A big one. On the floor. Moving. Up the wall. Behind my door. So i was trapped in my room and started crying like a child. As one does.

My mother wasn't even mad at me for waking her. Maybe she felt bad because I probably caught that stomach bug from her. Or she acknowledged that that spider was fucking huge and therefore definitely worth screaming about.

Now sitting in my bed with two dogs to keep me calm, and steadily increasing nausea again ♡

I don't think i should be allowed to live ♡

#the thing is #i don't even cry because of the spider itself #i started crying because i realized i needed (wanted) help removing it #and that's an indicator that I'm absolutely useless as a person #i can't live on my own #who the fuck is so goddamm incapable and can't even just vacuum a spider #Or remove it any other way #im ashamed for everything i am lol #I'm simply not made for life ahaha #pathetic #(derogatory)#anyway #probably gonna throw up some more now #cw vomit #mention #idk #sorry #gotta overshare #tbd

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coldflasher · 2 years

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i’m catshaming

i just started letting valletta out and i THOUGHT she knew how to behave, but apparently not, bc she climbed over the fence into the neighbours’ garden, only to discover she could not climb back out, so she sat there crying pitifully until i had to go round and knock on their door to ask if could come and rescue her

#i have lived here for a year and never introduced myself to them before #had to go round and be like yeah please can i come rescue my dumb cat #she can't figure out how to get over the fence #they were like aw bless her. she'll learn #she's only young #i was like haha yeah...#in actual fact she is 11 but she's also apparently an idiot #anyway im currently googling ramps so that i have a way to help her get back if she does it again #also considering like. spikes for the fence but idk #the thing is i have a fairly strong suspicion that she probably COULD have figured out how to get back eventually #but sadly i am a sucker and couldn't stand hearing her cry like it wasn't her own fault she got into this mess

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fluffybunnybadass · 2 years

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my brain wants to send me into a depressive spiral over any and every little thing since i called out of work bc of my wrist acting up out of nowhere, doing nothing, and i love that for me :)

/sarcasm

#afaik i dont need a note but trying to see if i could get one thru telehealth anyways just left me triggered and embarrassed for trying :)#and i finally called the finaid services for my med bill from june. so that's at least good but i have huge crybaby problems when admitting #that i need help! or rather. just asking for it!!! bc i got too proud!!!#and i'm sure i'll prob get denied but i figured i may as well apply for snap anyways bc everything is going up so bad #and my hrs for my wages don't reflect that at all #sbux may have *just* given us a raise on 8/1 (supposedly. sure jan /s) but it just happened and doesn't change the fact that the last few #months have been a financial struggle. trying to allow myself things for bits of happiness. and now i have to go back to #''everything that's not food/rent/utilities/absolute dire investment should cause guilt'' and its just like #i deserve nice things too. i deserve a liveable wage. did you know that you shouldnt be spending more than 30% of your income on uhh #utilities? also fuck i just realized i mathes up too far on my monthly wages between the two jobs bc i forgot. that its x2 for the one #average paycheck ig and x4 for the other so its just like #SHRUGS LOUDLY fml i x4 the sbux one..... so. bad. and idk how to edit #anyways i figure i'll be denied but it doesnt hurt to try. i guess. probably? who knows #anyways i should take my mood stabilizer i have 630am work and training to do. cry.

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airbenderedacted · 2 years

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I love you too!!! /p For the record I also listen to will wood I’m just not a superfan and I haven’t listened to the album because I didn’t have the energy to listen to new music yesterday,,, But anyways yes idk I just remember you talking about listening to will wood a while ago and you were like “I’m a gay little spinel kinnie of course I do” so maybe I had those words subconsciously in my mind… but in any case I . I just wanted to tell you everything will be okay . Because I know you have been sad in the past :( . And being a spinel kinnie if it’s for trauma is inherently sad HASHJSNAD. Anyways goodnight or good morning depending on when you see this. Rest well buddy💗💗💗

"I'M A GAY LITTLE SPINEL KINNIE OF COURSE I DO"

#IMN SIRRY YSYHGS BJNMS IM SORRY I READ THAT PART AND IT SENTM #JKSDFHGVSD NM E SO BAD I LIKE/ .#i think ym whole brain exploded just the inherit humor of that is GODLY im scvreaming #idk what it was i SAID but you remembering it like that is killing me it's jkllk BGHVDFJMK #HELPa #crying that made me completely unable to read the rest of ur ask for like. the past IDK mins straight hjsefhjskjs #BUT ANYWASY UM! okay yeah no i've been doing really well like emotionally and healthily and academically these past few months!!!#i think it so very WILL be okay YEAH!!!! 😄 <3333 that's really nice of you to wanna send me ty <333333 #(bc god yeah i was . fucked up SO BAD the beginning of the year. and also for a decent while prior to that. The Foreshadowing to the hrtgh)#(BUT IT'S FINALLY ENDEEEEDDDD YEYAGHDHAAHHHH and it better stay that way god (it probably will lol i've fixed like. a Lot of Thimngs👍💖))#Also. to that last spinel kinnie mention: HELP?#DWNMBDNBSNM OKAY ICAN SAY RIGHT NOW THAT THE KINNIE THING IS NOT BECAUE OF TRAUMA or at least i dont think i can say that #that fyucked up lil wad of pink bubble gum of a gem is just Literally Me and it's insane and yah :)#genuinely. very genuinely. movie premiere bringing her into existence was like having a mirror held up to my mind's eye. crazy #both in aesthetic and being ridiculously relatable on so many fronts both to past and present instances of myself like wtfff #(minus her wanting to hurt innocents during her stupid fucked up and evil phase - that was NOt a mood 😰 girl wtf the fuc)#WHY DID SHE HAVE LIKJE ALL OF MY MANNERISMS AT THE TIME. HER STUPID LITTLE WALK. THAT WAS 2019 ME HELPP #okay anyway done screaming abt being a kinnie ty for the ask and being so sweet and fun to talk to !!! 👋😄😊 <333 #fr!!!!!! ♡

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isastrxnd · 2 years

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Y'all know what time it is..... it's time for me to share my dream in the tags!!!

#the dream i had last night gave me so many emotions #so i was with my bestie and we were going on a walk when all of a sudden her dad came after me with a gun #he shot me in my aorta #my friend was freaking out and she carried me all the way to the woods where my family was having a picnic #and as soon as i got there CHARLES LECLERC picked me up and was holding me crying #IN MY DREAM HE WAS MY BOYFRIEND #back to the dream #so anyways my mom came up to me and was trying to give me shots to help with the bleeding and i was refusing them #and charles was begging for me to take them #i wouldn't take them though because i guess if i took the shots it could maybe make me die faster #so all of my family was walking up to me and i was telling them how much i loved them #and i was bleeding out of poor charles who was crying so much #and then after i said my goodbyes to all of my family charles held me really tight l #and he was telling me about how much he loved me and he was kissing me #and i could barely talk because i was almost dead but somehow i managed to say i love you to him then i died in his arms #and then everyone was crying and charles was just bawling and then i woke up from my dream #idk how i feel about the dying part but i liked that charles was my boyfriend #i probably got the dream because of the stupid major character death writing im working on #but anyways that was my dream #tw blood #tw death #charles leclerc #⬅️im going to tag charles because i frickin died in the poor babies arms #isa's random thoughts

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trix-or-treatz · 2 years

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I miss him

#i wont maintag my sad 2am thinkings but this is about techno #i miss him a lot #im still sitting hard in denial because it just feels like one of his long upload breaks still. but.#sometimes it hits really really hard #i was looking through his twitter which. probably didnt help but did make me smile #hed make fun of me for crying again i bet but here i am #miss him so much #anyway. im going to sleep now so. this will just sit here #maybe ill delete in the morning idk #vent #i guess #trix talks

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