#idk I feel whiny

[timemachineyeah]

the fact that I cannot simply quit my job. there’s plenty of food and space and skilled people in the world. things could function so much better with a tenth the labor if we were efficient about it. but we aren’t. and under capitalism I love my job - I am incredibly lucky to have it and even find it fulfilling in its way. but also I am disabled and my life would be 1000% easier if I just didn’t have to find miracle jobs to make what still comes to below poverty wages given how few hours I can manage. but even though the amount of money I make is play money to other people, it’s the only thing giving me dignity, both the dignity of privacy in spending and the false dignity of being a “productive member of society”. plus, like, I gotta eat and feed my cats, even if I’m currently rent free. but sometimes I think about the ways money and my job (and their relationship with my health) play as such large factors in my decision making and I just think, ideally, those would have less weight. ideally I could just quit my job and somehow still have money. not because I don’t love the work, but because of the limitations having to maintain both a work schedule and my fatigue put on me.

#timemachine wuz here #I do love my job though #like couldn’t ask for a better one. genuinely always anxious they’re gonna fire me even though they’ve given zero indication #and have always been really understanding and also complimentary #I think because I realize how much I enjoy the work compared to almost any job I’ve had #it just ticks so many boxes. and even the driving isn’t that bad (except when there’s snow but we are encouraged to call out #if we think it’s unsafe) #it’s just that at my level of fatigue. I feel like #ideally I wouldn’t need a job at all yk? #like on a straight financial level my job costs more than it’s worth #as in if I had 100k a year I would spend *more than my salary on a pill that eliminates my job’s impact on my health if such a pill existed #meaning like on some level I think my job isn’t objectively worth it #even though I think it is valuable work and I enjoy doing it and am able to maintain a remarkable work/life balance given its flexibility #relative to my level of disability #like pragmatically it’s an invaluable job that I love but idealistically i could just quit to write and play with my cats and clean the bat #idk I feel whiny

[luvrxbunny]

i would really love to be going down on a guy, like i’m kissing his balls or something and his hand comes around to just hold me in place while he lets out the most devastating moans above me.

and he’s like “yeah, yeah— oh shit. kiss my balls baby.”

“feels so good with you down there. put one in your mou- yes. oh my god like that, baby”

or he’s right on the edge and i haven’t kissed his balls yet but he wants to feel it before he cums. so i just feel his hands pulling me off him and then pushing me down to his balls.

“please. please i wanna- wanna feel it, sweetheart. ohhh- so fuckin’ warm. feels like m’melting, love”

“holy shit i’m right there- kiss them- kiss it, baby. kiss my balls for me, kiss ‘em”

#my period app says i’m not ovulating but idk man #i’m feeling pretty feral #ugh i think i’d be so hot #idk what to tag this cus it’s not a specific character #but imagine this with #joel miller #miguel o’hara #marc spector #steven grant #bucky barnes #and omg #eddie munson #he’d be extra whiny about it tho #he’d beg you to put them in your mouth instead of pushing your head down #my thots

[wingsofhcpe]

how do you politely tell your uni classmates that you're not gonna sit the exam for them

#i have gotten the reputation as The Good Student Who Helps People Out and listen. if there's good reason i will absolutely help you #like if you miss classes due to work or if you're ill. or if you have kids/dont live in this city. all's fair game then! #but when you ask me shit like “hey do you know what's gonna be on the exam” #or “hey do you know about XYZ” when XYZ is already on my notes that I've already sent to you #then I'm simply convinced you're lazy and want me to do your work for you and I'm honestly not having that #also girl how would i know what's gonna be on the exam. do you think i see the future??? #like yesterday DURING THE ONLINE EXAM i was getting bombarded with messages from two different people #one was asking me to tell her the answer to an entire ass essay #and the other asked me something that was very clearly and simply given to us in the exercise question #like the question was “use any text we've studied to analyse X Thing” and i was asked “does exercise a want us to analyse X Thing” #BRO. LITERALLY JUST READ THE ONE (1) LINE OF TEXT THAT'S TELLING YOU EXACTLY THAT. #idk this is such a whiny stupid vent but it legit feels like I'm being taken advantage of sometimes and it's annoying

[sluttywoozi]

gonna start giving awards to people who reblog my work bc these ratios are soul sucking

am i grateful to have so many readers? yes!!! i love that y'all show so much love to my work and i appreciate every single one of you

however

reblogs are the only way my work gets spread. they're the best way to show me you actually enjoyed it, and they're my motivation to keep writing more!

likes are basically meaningless to content creators, and they also give off the vibe that you like it enough to keep it in your library but not enough to share it with your friends

does that make sense?

#im literally desperate like im begging on my knees for more interaction with my work #idk what i have to do #if you think it'll mess up your blog aesthetic - make a sideblog and use that to reblog fics! #it takes actual hours to write what you read in 30 minutes #and if you're just consuming it without any thought to the time and energy and love writers put into their work #that's really disheartening #i don't want to come off as whiny or ungrateful #but pls for the love of god #reblog the works you enjoy! #✨em's thots and feelings✨

[cloudblaze]

On the one hand, it feels a bit late to be doing an "I'm so insecure because I'm a descendant of Firestar" plotline. You'd think if anyone was gonna deal with that it'd have been Firestar's grandchildren — especially Sparkpelt, since she looks like him — and not one of his great grandchildren born so long after he died.

On the other hand, though, I don't think Flamepaw's insecurities come from nowhere exactly. It would make sense if all of Firestar's descendants had some feeling of pressure sometimes to live up to their ancestry, and if Flamepaw is just feeling it more because he keeps messing up and taking it really hard. He wants his Clanmates to be proud of him and he's failed multiple warrior assessments because he keeps getting too caught up in his own head about it. And because he's obsessed with being descended from two leaders and the deputy, he keeps projecting onto everyone else and assuming they're always thinking about that fact too.

He actually reminds me a lot of his grandpa Bramblestar (back in TNP) in that regard. He's so fixated on his family line and the expectations that come from it that whenever he thinks someone is being unfair towards him, he shifts the blame to his ancestry and to his Clanmates.

Is Flamepaw overreacting? Yes. Is he being kind of ridiculous and unfair? Yes. But I can see how it all makes sense in his little brain.

#yes i have finally started asc!!! #read half of river in one sitting today #idk how I'm gonna end up feeling about flamepaw. i think there's a 50/50 chance of me either loving or disliking him #i mean. i love lionblaze because he's hot garbage and i love rootspring because he's a whiny pissbaby. i think they're fun #flamepaw so far seems to be a mix of both LOL #i have zero thoughts on sunbeam or frostpaw yet but they seem nice #as far as characters go I'm most invested in lightleap so far lmao #girl get help!!!!

[that-was-anticlimactic]

one of the worst feelings ever is wanting to write but your hands hurt too much or the words just don’t want to work so you just sit there staring at a half finished doc with tears in your eyes bc you want to write and you need to write but everything is telling you that you can’t

#and that you’re a terrible writer and that no one cares aaaaaaand imposter syndrome kicks in and you just feel like crap #bc all your friends have been wriying recejtky so why can’t you??? cause they’re bETTER THAN YOU #lol idk why my head is so bad today #the feelings of inferiority and emptiness and idk worthlessness are strong and i hate it but i can’t stop it #i just wanna write!!! and like what i write!!! #but i Can’t and i haven’t liked anything i’ve written in Months and ugh i hate not being able to d something i wanna do #oh and now i’m crying??? why the frick am i cRYING litetally why is typing this making me Worse #sorry guys needed to rant #the inadequacy was strong today #something something students keep telling me how much they dislike me or how i’m whiny for asking them to be respectful and like #i Know i shouldn’t compare myself to my friends but gosh it’s hard when they’re all like. so much better than me. #and i don’t have a lot of time to be on tumblr bc of work so i just feel like i’m watching everything from afar and it’s no one’s fault but #my brain’s like no one is Doing anything it’s just my brain being dumb and i can’t stand it and I want to stop feeling empty and like i’m #missing a part of myself and like the words i write don’t matter gOD why can’t i just feel happy with where i am and not care what the kids #who hate me say or realize that no one cares that i’m not on much like i’m still Here and trying to interact it’s not like everyone hates me #for being busy or for liking side characters more than the main characters and just— #sorry #that felt good actually #idk what came over me #imma just. imma shower. then maybe delete my tags #sorry if anyone got this far aT ALL grace is either asleep or trying to sleep so i don’t wanna bother them since they slept poorly last nigh #okay done now for real sorry delete tags later sorry if you saw this and how freaking messed up ky freaking brain is

[guideaus]

love her

#personal #the apothecary diaries lb #and w the plotpoint i cant really say if its relevant or not tbh. the manga has a lot of little conflicts i feel arent important in the lon #run so idk if its filler or not. the first full 9 mins didnt exist between ch5 and 6 tho #also i wanna see jinshi be whiny soo bad. huryy uppp. poison and whiny please!!

[hearts4juzi]

no bc why am i still hung up on how michael being afab would affect his relationship with evan... stop.

#blame percy bc honestly the whole idea of michael thriving off of toxic masculinity came from him HDHSHDSH #crying into my hands #this is genuinely so interesting bc like #itd be less “youre a crybaby” and more “nobody likes a crybaby.” #“nobody will like you the way that you are. nobody likes someone who whines.” #“everyone already knows you're lame. everyone already knows youre whiny.” ect #bc frankly girls who are rude are different from boys who are rude... especially if they were raised in the 80s i think #idk. just food for thought. #ofc eventually theyd grow out of that mentality but. i feel like in general the bite would have gone differently #tzu rambles

[gently-decaying-flowers]

oh….

#char’s diary #i want love so bad it’s pathetic #i want love so bad i’m a whiny baby #i want love so bad yet i can’t keep a crush or a friend or anything to save my life #i want love and i don’t know why i can’t feel it #i know i know #i love my friends #AND I DO #i love them so much #but there’s something i crave about a romantic relationship #there just is #maybe that makes me selfish #idk #but it’s not like it’ll happen for me anytime soon anyway #no one even knows who i am #and if i were to be in a relationship i’d have to come out #everything is on hold #my whole life has been put on hold #just till i get out of this house #just till i get a job #just till i transition #will i ever stop waiting? #will i ever be free of the things holding me back? #will i always have a barrier #will i always be forced to wait #just until #will i ever be content? #is it too much to ask to just feel happy and comfortable

[kaladinkholins]

i think im gonna take a break from my fic to write my original work instead

#something something lack of engagement makes it discouraging for all artists and writers something something #i think the good thing about how i finished writing 'the stories we tell' before i even started posting a single chapter #is that the writing process was fun in the sense that i did it completely for me #there was no external pressure to write faster or try to write more 'interesting' chapters #whatever i wrote i wrote it for the sake of the story. because i wanted to #but posting a WIP and writing chapter by chapter? at least for me i def feel some pressure to please #and when i dont get much of a response on each update it's kinda disheartening #by response i mean people engaging with the actual like. contents. the lines i wrote. idk. #IGNORE ME IM BEING WHINY AND UNGRATEFUL #i genuinely love all my readers and commenters and everyone following along with the story #i just get too lost in my head and feelings sometimes #which is why i think its necessary for me to take a break and take my mind off it by writing my own original stuff for a while #at least for a few days #shut up haydar #on writing.log

[soldier-poet-king]

Smthn smthn butchered tongue making me bawl my eyes out even tho my ancestral languages weren't taken from me by force. Like. It is explicitly a song about the cultural violence of colonialism.

My experiences do not compare to that! And I still grieve! I still grieve the cultural connections and comforting tongue I lost! I grieve that in trying to better their situation amongst desperate post war poverty my grandparents and great grandparents immigrated, and the predominance of English, the necessity of it, the issues of my mother going to school not speaking any English, meant that by the time I came around the comforting dialects are only spoken between the older generations, save for a few slang words and highly specific food terms. I grieve that I can't roll my rs properly, and the Italian double consonants still trip up my tongue. I grieve that vague hazy childhood memories of my Nonna's house mean that the most comforting of accents, the most comforting tongue, is one I do not know, and can never master organically. I can study all I want but it'll never be natural. I can muddle my way through the basics, my Canadian accent grating the edges of the language, but it's not the same! It'll never be the comforting lilt of being a young child and having all the extended elderly family laughing and arguing around the table.

Obvs I am not the only generational-diaspora-immigrant kid to feel this way. I'm at the odd spot of not having been the immigrant myself, but having the people who raised me not be assimilated enough for me to really feel at home in the new culture either. I'm not far enough away, generationally, to not feel the separation. There is a persistent sense of loss for something I can only grasp the vaguely edges of.

And obvs this isn't the same as forced diasporas, of refugees, of colonial supression of native tongues. But there's still a grief there, even as I feel guilty for grieving it - I benefitted greatly, materially, from this linguistic loss. And yet! And yet!

#the duality of fran #this makes no sense ik and is super whiny of me im sorry #its not even ACCURATE im onlt half #but i barely know or have connections w my dads family #for all intents and purposes i am wholly this calabrese-canadian creature #and idk. #this isnt even getting into the whole romanticized old country image #bc that's not what it is #im not under any illusions that either italt or canada are some promised land #both have a lot of issues #im not like uwu everything would be better in whatever alternate scenario #i just. grieve this loss of this thing that i feel should have been part of me but isnt #its not natural and inherent to me the way i wish it were

[quirkle2]

i wish i wouldn't do this to myself. why do i buy games on steam and then not play them for a while and then hate them and request a refund way outside of the refund time window

#qktalks #this is about sonic frontiers . imso fucking sorry #the game LOOKED awesome it looked fun. the beginning is terrible i feel pained to even say it #feels clunky. won't stop FUCKING bothering you with tutorials #killed the first boss and the game literally said ''hey it dropped something. that's important btw. pick it up. don't forget to pick it up' #i am playing a video game. what else am i going to do. #it definitely feels like breath of the wild if it constantly bothered u like every ten feet with reminders #imso sorry sonic frontiers. u had sm potential. u Have so much. i am simply a whiny bitch #also the game looks . surprisingly bad ? #i thought it would look a lot better. it doesn't look shitty by any means but it also doesn't .....look good #the voice acting at the beginning too leaves ...smth to be desired #i have a mutual (hi parker) who loves sonic parker if ur reading this im on my hands and knees begging for forgiveness /silly #this is my first sonic game so maybe it was just not the best first choice ? idk #still love u sonic ur a silly little guy #actually the refund window is 14 days and i've had the game for 16 days ......... so maybe i can still make it #maybe . idk #steam please . i got it on sale i got it half off please just give me my $30 back.im hungry steam #<- lives with her parents and does not buy the food

[rohirric-hunter]

Me, on the LotRO Forums: Hey @ devs I really appreciate the way you implemented this feature. It really improves the game and here's why I think that.

Some Loser: NO IT DOESN'T!!!!!!! IT SUCKS AND I HATE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#literally barely even upset #just kind of feel sorry for them #they are also very silly #they seem to think that the point of the reward track is like? upgrading your li? silly #its obviously for cosmetics and upgrading your li is a cool side benefit #this is not a joke i 100% believe this #i believe that the vast majority of lotros playerbase does not give a shit about lis #and will only work on them if the materials to do so are literally handed to them #that certainly describes me anyway #so in order to make the li system function at all they have to dangle shiny cosmetics in front of players and then also give them li mats #this sounds like im insulting people but im not #it just isnt a priority #and the devs understand that and are working with us on it #its just that the people who only care about that are loud and whiny and on the forums #but idk. we cant let them have the run of the forums #weve got to have a presence there too #which is why im putting on my big girl britches and actually posting over there these days

[brainworm-blitz]

happy ace week to all the aces that were actually horrified/devastated to realize they were ace. btw.

I love u.

#asexual #asexual week #aegosexual #demisexual #i am speaking to all under the umbrella im just at work and have to be quick with tags sorry loves #if u got euphoria or validation or happy emotions on ur discovery congrats!!! super glad for u honestly #personally though i legitimately wanted to kms lowkey #like it was so incomprehensibly devastating to me #gritting my teeth and learning to accept myself whether i want to or not #idk it just seems like everyone else was relieved to hear it or something to that effect #it was just the 'first' (read: first one to be recognized) lgbt identity i ever found myself in #and yet even with everyone i see talking about experiences that ive never related more strongly to i still feel very Othered for it #i simply cant share in the joy. or at least im trying very hard to. #idk. im whiny. #brainworm posting

[corrodedcoughin]

Pspsps can I beg for under 10k fluff fics or art. Smut can be included that does not bother me. Self promo is actively encouraged. Just anything that makes you feel happy and good and that life is okay. Ps hope you all are having a good day

#for full sordid details of why I am begging I made a pathetic tag post on my main #if you feel so inclined you can read it but honestly I wouldn’t bother it’s not interesting just whiny and rambling #fun fact my lore is not worth discovering #but more to the point I do actively wish you all a good weekend and I MEAN it #i really hope you all do something you enjoy today!! and if you aren’t then I hope whatever you aren’t enjoying passes quickly!!! #comforting touches for those who wish and comforting words for those who prefer that and both to those who like both #(genuine question is my worth only that of a hype person? probably yes) #IDK man don’t get employed if you can avoid it! #my dog is sleeping and I took my friend out for her lunch for her birthday today #she told me all about her f1 guys. seeing her so happy was so lovely #idk idk I’ll go reblog some stuff