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lilacwineandthesinkingsun · 2 years

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Sweeter than honey.. Part 5

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT.

WARNING: this contains physical abuse, blood, please skip this episode if you're sensitive.

Summary: You're a close friend to the modern!Ragnarssons, and when you find yourself in a bad place they help. Even if it's finding a new room to rent, or your sex-life.

Masterlist

You woke up feeling weird. You weren't sick or anything, there was just this anxiety that's been making the hairs on your back standing on alert. That wasn't going away for the remainder of the day. You felt like you've been watched the whole day. Followed around.

Then you just sighed and finished work.

When you got home, Ubbe's car wasn't there, so you went ahead and started to prepare dinner. Not long after you heard the front door open.

-KITCHEN. - you yelled, so he knew where you were. You didn't look up when someone stepped behind you, thinking it was him coming to greet you. But instead a piece of cloth was shoved before your mouth and nose, strange smelling chemical laced in it. You fel your body go heavy before you passed out.

When Ubbe got home he thought you went to the bathroom, so he waited patiently. But when you've seemed to spend an awful lot of time there he went to check. Only then did he find out that you're not in the apartment. He tried calling you, but it went straight to voicemail. There were no sings of someone breaking in, so he texted his brothers, askng if they had heard from you.

Just when he was about to call again, Bjorn called him. He picked up immediately, maybe it's news from you, Bjorn was away, so he was the last he planned to call.

-Ubbe, is (y/n) with you?

-No, i'm trying to get a hold of her, why?

-Shit. Call the others immediately, i'll be back by morning.

-What? Why? What happened?

-Your fucking ex-wife and out halfwitted brother Sigurd got back to the country yesterday. If i'd have to guess then i'd say they want (Y/n).

-Shit, she said she felt someone was watching her the whole day. FUCK, i should've been picking up her regardless of her saying no. FUCK Bjorn... what the fuck do we do now?

-As i said, call the others, they will know what to do, i'll be back tomorrow. We'll get her back, and i'll sure hope that without any bruises and shit. You know how bad those two can be...

-Fcking psychos....

An hour later 3 very anxious guy and Lagertha was pacing around Ubbe's livingroom. Nor Margrethe nor Sigurd picked up their phones.

They had not heard from you for long hours now, even Bjorn got back into town. He nearly tore the door off of it's hinges. The plan was for Ubbe to try ang get back on Margrethe's good side. He sent her a text.

-It's done.. and it better fucking work.. If these fucking fake messages get to (Y/n), she'll let them kill her willingly...

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Meanwhile in an abandoned factory in the outskirts of town..

You were strapped in a chair in a dimly lit room when you woke up. Your head was pounding, the rope was burning into your wrists harshly. Judgind by the wet feeling it already reached your soft flesh and you were bleeding.

The door opened and someone jumped over to you.

-OOoh, you finally woke up. hahahahaa - she giggled. You knew this voice. When did she got back?

-WHy.. why did you kidnap me? - you asked still dizzy. She harshly took a hold of your chin, making you look in front of you as she whispered.

-You took what is mine.. also... i know someone who you missed out while fucking all the Lothbrok men.. - she saig still giggling like a maniac, as Sigurd came into view with a sick smirk on his face.

-It's not a nice thing to fuck my brothers and not me...

-You don't even like me.. just.. just let me go.. I am not fucking responsible for any of your brothers choices.

He walked closer making you look up at him, you hissed as he held your chin, it hurt.

-You see, i do not like you, but i do like your body. I fantasized about fucking you senseless since you grew tits... Also i would very much like to have my bastard brothers listen to you moan and scream my name...

-They won't give shit... when she was more than a simple fuck anyways? - Margrethe said as she was typing away on her phone. When she was done she walked up to Sigurd, putting an arm on his shoulder, looking at you.

-Ubbe just told me she was a quick fuck to help him forget me which he couldn't so.. Have fun lil bro in law, i'll be on my way on a date with my husband. - she said, nearly spitting the words at you.

You had tears in your eyes. Ubbe was so quick to forget you, so quick to call on her. It was so easy to believe that noone will help you and that you were just some fuckdoll to them..

-Awww.. pretty baby.. you thought you matter to them don't you? It's alright.. i'm here to fuck them out of your system.. well of course.. my way,, - he said, his smile evenb more sinister as he cut the rope that held your hands to the chair, yanking you after him to an even darker room. It only had ropes and chains hanging in the middle. He started to tie you up, not mindig if it hurt or not, or if you could feel your hands or legs. You were nothing for him but a toy. Well.. for him too. He soon had you suspended in the air, one leg barely reaching the ground, the other is tied to you side. At least you still had clothes on... Up until he came over and cut them down, not minding if he cut you or not, which he did a few times.

-Cry all you want.. you see... it actually makes me harder.. so does blood.. - he said as he smudged over some cuts harshly. You were handing in a cold room, only wearing your underwear, completely at the mercy of a sociopath. Not how you imagined your night to go. - and noone's gonna hear you.. - he whispered before he harshly spanked your inner thigh, not even bothering to smooth over it. It was plainly for hurting you. This all was. You tried to remain quiet, to not give him the pleasure of either hearing you cry, or hearing you hiss in pain. You're gonna give him nothing. He will either let you go or kil lyou when he'd become bored, and you were fine with either.

When you didn't react to spanks and bites anymore, he started using his fists. You were bleeding from your nose and mouth now, he also busted your brow, but you still refused to give him a single sound. When he got tired of it and searched around for stuff to hurt you with, the door opened, revealing a giggling Margrethe and a giggling Ubbe, hand in hand. You looked at him, and spat on the ground.

-Good to see you came to your senses Brother.. - said Sigurd as he hit your back with a lash.

-Yea, well it was only a matter of time till i missed my wifey like crazy.. She's a good fuck though.. - he said as he put an arm around Margrethe. She huffed and pouted. - not as good as you honey... - he said before he kissed her. Your heart broke at the sight. You trusted him, you believed him when he said he loved you since you were kids.. and now it was all a lie. No son of Ragnar deserved to ever have you. Why did you even try, why believe them? Silent tears escaped your eyes, stinging where they've gone into your bruises.

Ubbe then told her to watch, while he makes a call to a client. And she happily stayed and watched as Sigurds lashes you, drawing blood already from numerous cuts.

-So this turns you on huh? - she asked seemingly interested.

-Aren't she prettier this way? Bloodied, silent, vulnerable.

She just hummed. Soon Ubbe got back, and sat down on the couch next to Margrethe watching you with an emotionless face, as if the last few days meant absolutely nothing. You hung your head low, and just looked at the blood under you. As the small dots got bigger an bigger. Then the door opened again, and then it all went blank. You heard shouting, fighting, but all the energy left you. You weren't gonna fight anything anymore. The ones you trusted betrayed you in the most disgusting way, what point was there anymore? These were your last thoughts before you passed out.

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Ubbe on the phone...

-Ivar, Bjorn, Hvitserk.. need you to come to the old factory downtown, the abandoned one. Basement level, follow the lights. Also... call Lagertha, we'll need medical help..

-For them? - scoffed Ivar.

-For (Y/n).. - Ubbe said, then Ivar saw red. so did Bjorn and Hvitserk. They loaded the truck, calling Lagertha on the way.

When they barged in Ivar didn't even saw you at first, he just threw his axe at Sigurd, hitting his chest, killing him immediately. Then he saw you. Unconscious, suspended. When he looked to the side, he saw Ubbe holding a knife to Margrethe's neck. Hvitserk and Bjorn was already getting you down. Bjorn put his jacket around you, carrying you princess style. You were badly beaten, all over. They would never forgive Sigurd this, nor Margrethe. After Ivar saw you, and your state he started to beat up Sigurd's lifeless body, making him almost unrecognizable. Hvitserk tore Ivar off of him, while Ubbe tied Margrethe up. They will deal with her later, until then she will be good in the cell under the family mansion.First and foremost, they needed to get you to the mansion before you lost even more blood. Lagertha was waiting there. The color left her face as she saw you, watching as Ubbe yanked a giggling Margrethe behind him, straight down to the cells.

-Sigurd?

-Pulp, abandoned factory downtown. Slowly burning to shit now. - said Bjorn as he put you down, immediately lighting a cigarette. They could not lose you. Not when they only just got to have you.

Lagertha tended to your wounds, stiching a few together, bandaging the others, smoothing over ointments and antiseptic. She gave you painkillers through IV too. Now they just had to wait. They all refused to leave, so they sat out in the huge livingroom, sipping on their whiskey silently.

-WHat will we do with her? - asked Hivtserk.

-She needs to die. - said Bjorn as he clenched his jaw.

-Should've killed her in Norway. - said Ivar looking over at Ubbe.

-Should've never taken her o na fucking date. - said Ubbe as he slammed his glass down. He stood up, loaded his gun. -Call Floki, we'll ned to do something with her body. - he said before walking down to the cells. A single shot was heard then silence. Only the steps Ubbe took, before sitting don with his refilled whiskey.

-Do yall think she believed them about me? About us?

-We'll know when she wakes up..

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You did wake up 4 days later. Silently looking in front of you, with an emotionless face. When Ubbe woke up next to you, he immediately called out.

-(Y/n), sweetheart, you're awake.. - he sighed - i thought we're gonna lose you..

-You did not.. what i don't understand is... why did you even save me? go be with her..

-why did we even save you? we love you.. we really do..

-you sure as hell did not love me while you watched Sigurd beat me to pulp..

-what was i supposed to do? take on them myself alone? I had to alert the others and wait for them to get there.. i wish i could show you how much it fucking killed me to see you that way...

-just leave Ubbe... what's the point in pretending that i matter? as soon as i can walk i'll be out of your hairs... for good.

He cannot say anything else... he barged out, the others flowing in. Lagertha came with your medicine when she heard you scream at them to leave you alone.

-Give her time boys.. She'll come around.. - she said, trying to calm their nerves. She was the only one you were willing to talk to... well occasionally..

She changed your bandages, took out the stiches, gave you your meds. Before you fell asleep again, you asked her.

-Do you think they are telling the truth?

-I know they are. I watched you all grow. It might not always seem that way, but.. everyone knew you would be theirs as much as they would be yours. Even the gods told us.. . I remember when Torvi, Aslaug, Helga and I were dreaming the same thing over and over, that you were made for eachother.. with all of them.. There are things you should not fight (Y/n)... - she said gently holding your hand. You were asleep now.

The next day you woke up to Bjorn's blue eyes boring into you.

-How are you feeling? - he asked softly.

-Better.

-Still want to move away?

-Not sure..

-Well if it makes any difference... i um.. i got this after the second night we spent together at my place.. - he said placing a small box down on your lap before leaving the room.

You slowly opened the box, revealing a ring. Not diamond, that wouldn't be really you.. It was a simple band out of gold, with a black inlay, and with gold letters it said, till death. You cried softly. A few hours later Hvitserk visited, you two talked while Lagertha changed your bandages. He got a call and Lagertha gave you a knowing look.

-DId you know? - you asked.

-It dawned on me, yes. Remember when you kicked his ass when you were just a child? I remember him coming home huffing and puffing. And when i asked why he was so angry he said that he don't care that the others laughed at him, or that you bested him, but he was angry that when he was about to kiss you, Ubbe jumped on him, tackling him to the ground. He wanted you to be his first kiss..

-Well i wasn't.. and as i remember there were plenty others. - you smiled to yourself.

-Yes and all had similar qualities as you. Either from the inside or the outside, but none of them were you..

She kissed your forehead before leaving. That night you could not sleep. You knew they were all in the mansion. Lagertha told you they all refused to leave. You slowly got up, still weak so you were trying to be as quiet as you can, heading for Bjorn's room. You knocked gently, and he told a quiet it's open. probably thinking its his mother or one of his brothers. When he saw it was you, and also because you were so weak, barely standing, he shot up from his bed, Hugging you to himself gently.

-Careful now. - he said holding you flush to himself. - What are you doing out here? SHouldn't you be in bed princess? - he looked at you with concern.

-I um.. i know i just.. i couldn't sleep.. and i.. i thought..

-Shh, it's okay, i'm happy you're here, i was just worried. Come let's get you to bed. - he said slowly leading you to his bed, then taking you into his arms as gently as he could. He missed your perfect body, fitting into his side perfectly. You were made for him. Your presence both calmed him and made him unbeliavebly happy.

After a few minutes of revelling in his scent, and the heat of his body, only did you realize that he was halfnaked, only wearing his sweatpants. You reached for the pocket of your gown, taking out the small box, putting it on his chest. You heard his breath hitch, but then you put your arm around his middle, and your head on his chest.

-Wanted you to give it to me properly. - you whispered and he let out a low chuckle, holding you closer. He took it out of the box, looking at you sweetly, taking your hand in his.

-(Y/n), i know this might sound crazy.. but.. i haved loved you ever since i knew you. And i just.. i ... i talked with them about this.. we all know the prophecy, but... that shouldn't mean that i cannot do this... and if you.. if you'd have me.. i would be so fucking honored if you'd marry me.

You didn't answer just cried and nod into his chest, holding out your finger for him to slip on the ring. He kissed you softly, aware of your injuries.

The next morning Lagertha came running into his room.

-Bjorn.. Bjorn.. (Y/n)'s not in her...... - she then stopped and smiled as she saw you curled into Bjorn's side, his arm protectively around you, as you both slept. Ubbe and Ivar along with Hvitserk came too, they all smiled, knowing they did not lose you. When Lagertha motioned to her finger, they saw that you had the ring on.

-Guess we have a wedding to plan now huh? - asked Hvitserk with the biggest smile on his face.

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ghastlybin · 1 year

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How so you feel about youtuber Gahyeon X youtuber reader and both fandoms ship them together? I think it would be really cute 🥺🥺🥺🥺

I love this idea so I shall grant your wish :) I just hope I did it right haha! ILY and thank youuuu for requesting! :)

Pairing: Youtuber! Gahyeon X Youtuber! GN Reader

WC: 1.3k

Genre/contents: Fluff, Youtuber AU, Y/N is lowkey awkward.... As hell. But it's fine, you still pulled.

Note: I'm kinda sad lately, especially today, so thank you for requesting smth fluffy :) I don't really have much of a note because I'm lowkey out of it and it's 1 am, surprise, surprise. I would say I have a YT channel but I am socially anxious so I'm gatekeeping that, however I would like to say I did NOT BASE THE Y/N OFF OF ME! Even though I could totally pull Gahyeon :') jk lmao. I hope you enjoy though! Whether you are a youtuber reader or an awkward reader, or a bold/ confident reader or a reader in general. Ily and if this flops, it's because y'all don't like me...

...I'm 100% joking LMAO

also, I fcking love this picture & I love her, goodnight/morning/afternoon!

Admittedly, you were popular.

If you imagined every subscriber you had in a room, it would be sardine packed.

Ten people was a lot.

One-Hundred people was a lot.

One million? A lot.

As the number grew, so your popularity. You were consistent with putting out content, you had a magnetic energy to you that had people across the globe returning for more.

You’ve cheered people up, made people laugh, and you’re someone’s role model, just as your role model is for you.

“Hey, all! Welcome back!”

You loved reading comments of encouragement. The endless compliments that would multiply by the hour.

This was your hobby. Making videos and sharing them with the world— Not as easy a task as you’d expected, but you were proud of yourself for making that jump, and that’s all that mattered.

Then there was Gahyeon, as stunning as ever and just as popular, if not more.

She was energetic and had a way of making even the most irritable person smile. Even you found yourself drawn to her.

“Welcome back, Gahyeon!” Gahyeon’s greeting played through your headphones, watching her latest video.

You never realized how similar your intros were. It was almost as if she completed your intro with her name. The thought of her watching your videos gave you a warm feeling that couldn’t be explained in just words.

Gahyeon watching your videos— Watching you, knowing what you looked like, sounded like, as well as your hobbies, and the schedule you typically posted.

You scrolled through the comments as her ‘Q&A’ video continued to play while you were waiting on a lengthy car ride to the convention you were a guest at.

As you scrolled further down, you noticed your name being mentioned more. At first, once or twice every few comments, but the further you scrolled, they became back-to-back full of mentions of you and a specific time stamp.

The comments varied from excitement that her fanbase felt when you had been mentioned to comments that stated how they shipped you and Gahyeon. All of them made your heart flutter.

You clicked the timestamp, hearing Gahyeon’s voice as she moved on to the next question.

“Have you seen Y/N’s videos?”

Your heart thumped hard against your chest as Gahyeon’s eyes lit up as she looked at the camera.

“Who hasn’t? They are amazing.” Gahyeon’s answer made you immediately pause, trying not to garner any attention from anyone in the vehicle with you.

The last thing you wanted was to cause a wreck because you felt like screaming.

Then again, you felt you could die a happy death.

“I actually really love them. They seem like a nice person, so Y/N,” Gahyeon leaned closer to the camera. “Hit me up.”

You paused again after she winked at the camera and screamed, startling everyone in the vehicle.

Upon entering the venue where the convention would be held at, you noticed how many fans were wearing shirts or hold signs that had either you or Gahyeon on it, and occasionally the other guests.

The excitement you felt when you noticed Gahyeon was at the booth beside yours, shot through the roof.

You had to remind yourself to be professional and that you were here as a guest, not a fan.

Screw that.

Gahyeon was right there.

You wanted her autograph just as much as the long line of people in front of her booth.

“Y/N.” A staff member caught your attention and you realized you were holding up your own line by staring at Gahyeon.

“I am so sorry.” You apologized to the fan in front of you, signing their autograph. Your fans were luckily understanding, if not happy, that you were staring at Gahyeon.

The next fan came up to you, handing you something to sign, “I think you and Gahyeon would be cute together.”

And for a moment, you felt a rush of confidence.

“I agree.”

The fans around had all heard you, gasps and awes filled the area, causing you to become flustered.

The fan left, satisfied, and you noticed them entering Gahyeon’s line next.

For a split second, you wished you were behind a screen, hiding from how bold you were moments ago. Sure, you were a celebrity— Technically, but you often forgot that fact. Making videos was your hobby. You were still as much a regular person as Gahyeon was and the pedestal you placed her on made you bolder than you would’ve been if you said that about a random person.

You began to consider the fact that maybe you were crushing on her.

Then you remembered Gahyeon saying she loved you.

Only as a fan, but she still said it.

As you signed more autographs, you would occasionally glance over at Gahyeon, only you were more nervous seeing the fan you agreed with reaching the front of the line.

The next time you glanced at Gahyeon, she and the fan were both looking at you, her cheeks were a tint of pink as she wore a smile on her face.

You quickly looked away, now knowing the fan relayed what you said, despite not being able to actually hear their conversation.

’She thinks I’m weird.’

‘Shut up, no she doesn’t.’

Thoughts swam around your mind, trying your best to focus on the fans in front of you.

‘You can’t rush yourself into a relationship.’

‘Watch me.’

‘No, Y/N. Stop overthinking.’

At this point, you felt like you were talking to yourself in your mind while your mouth was on autopilot.

As your line came to an end, and so did the convention, you were escorted to the private area, separate from the public area.

As you were getting ready to leave, yet another successful event complete, you were frozen when you spotted Gahyeon on her way towards you. You were too star-struck to really function normally, but she exuded confidence. She always seemed to get what she wanted— And she wanted you.

“I’m sorry.” You weren’t sure what exactly you were apologizing for. Gahyeon obviously didn’t understand why you were apologizing.

“Why?”

A question you didn’t know how to answer.

“I don’t know why I said that.”

Gahyeon grinned, holding out her hand for you to shake, formally meeting you. You shook her head gingerly, if not nervously.

‘She’s a normal person like you. Don’t be nervous.’

And to be fair, she’s very gorgeous, and that alone was enough to justify why you felt so nervous and why your heart pounded inside your chest the way it did.

“A lot of people like us together.” Gahyeon held onto your hand far longer than a regular handshake.

“Guess we’re married with two kids, one dog, and three cats?” You felt an annoying amount of awkwardness when you said that out loud, wishing you replied with something else less forward. Instead, you played it off as a joke, and refused to let go of her hand first.

“I guess so.” Gahyeon smiled, taking you by surprise.

You thought back to the influx of commenters shipping you with Gahyeon. It could work, you two jumping into a relationship. You both had massive amounts of support from both of your respective fanbases. You felt she could read your mind when Gahyeon had leaned close enough to whisper in your ear, goosebumps blanketing your skin. You worried she could hear your heart beating as loud as you heard it and somehow ceased any and every thought you had.

“I think I like us together too.”

And she let go of your hand, her eyes meeting yours again, followed by a wink.

#dreamcatcher fluff #dreamcatcher imagines #dreamcatcher au #dreamcatcher x reader #dreamcatcher gahyeon x reader #dreamcatcher #dreamcatcher gahyeon

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larstudy · 2 months

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Things are getting difficult. Not for me but for one of my dearest friend who is currently heading to the psychiatric urgencies. I'm so fcking worried for him that I wasn't able to neither study nor eat correctly today. I can't be with him as he doesn't want to and it's the birthday my bf's brother with his family and all...

I'm ready to leave this birthday to help him if needed and I really really really hope it will get better for him fast but I'm so so anxious tonight.

#lar rambles

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eternally-tired-cryptid · 2 months

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Listen I know some people are gonna reach out more often and some people aren't but a majority of my friends never make plans! They don't ask if I wanna hang out unless I offer first. And I know them. I know this isnt malicious they just don't think of the option or are too anxious to ask. But I'm so fcking tired of reaching out all the time and doing all the planning. I would like for them to reach out more! But idk how to phrase this request without sounding like I'm having a meltdown over something like this cuz I shouldn't be so bothered

#jasper rambles #i just!!!! how do i say 'pls make more of an effort to initiate conversation and make plans' without sounding like a dick

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hiimcanadia · 2 months

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Not the point of that post obviously but god I need to pin "it's not inherently sexual to pack as a trans man" to the inside of my skull bc I get SO fcking anxious whenever I pack. I'm always worried someone is going to see my packer and make some sort of comment or give me a weird look even though half the time you can't even see it. Like I love wearing a packer bc it's very affirming to me but also I worry that everyone around me is just gonna see it as a sex thing

#i was writing this post off and on during choir and i think that I had more to say but i forgot #2pm in the morning #gender stuff

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eleni-cherie · 9 months

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ok nobody's gonna see or care this but I'm gonna rant bc I am sick of my life and maybe someone can relate: so long story short, I'm a 27 year old graphic designer who was working 2 years at a big e-commerce shop until the new asshole supervisor didn't want to continue my contract that expired bc of his hurt ego bc I (along w pretty much everyone else bc he liked to pick fights w ppl from all departments bc he got into everyone's business) dared to argue w him BC HE KEPT CHANGING HIS MIND EVERY TWO MINS AND KEPT CONTRADICTING HIMSELF ALL THE TIME. so I lost my job last October and ever since I'm unemployed. I live in germany (Berlin) so I get unemployment money, but it only lasts for a year and it's already the end of July and I still can't manage finding a job although I've probably applied to 90 jobs by now of which only about 10-15 turned into job interviews - or the new trend "getting to know you meetings". of which only 1 invited me for a 2nd interview. now I get there's sadly so many designers, the job market is kinda oversaturated and for one job probably 20-30 ppl apply. but then sometimes this isn't even the problem. I had an interview for what seemed to be my dream job so I was super excited for this but then when I met the two guys doing it, they were very underwhelming. I mean little to no reaction to what I was telling them about myself and at the end they only asked 3 quite superficial questions. that's it. meanwhile others for companies I'm less suitable for, ask me like 20. then there's this other case, where they give you tasks and I don't mind tasks but one time I'd have needed the whole creative suit for them and like - hello? I'm unemployed and don't have the extra money to spend 60 euros every month on Adobe? I only an old Photoshop Version and that's it. then another time they gave me tasks that were only 40% graphic design related (but very vague descriptions/no real info) and 60% marketing/copyright related and like sorry, but I only have basic marketing knowledge and I'm not a fcking ad writer? there's this trend nowadays, they say they want a graphic designer but what they really want is a graphic designer / marketing expert / social media manager / copywriter / photographer / editor / etc. but still w only a graphic designer salary, so they don't have to pay five different ppl. like FCK YOU!

and thing is, in my desperation I even applied to random jobs (which said "No experience needed" in the description) like vendor or barrista. even in a copyshop where I thought I should fit in bc of my knowledge of print products, but either no response at all or I "lacked sale experience". bc Idk how it's in other countries but here you need a certificate for anything. even for a shop vendor you need a 3 year long apprenticeship. for a moment I contemplated going freelance or self-employed but a) I got no fcking clue how and what I have to do and b) taxes and insurance system in Germany is insane, I read an article and was overwhelmed.

So yeah, I'm getting fed up and sad and mad mostly also very anxious about my fcking future bc it honestly seems like I'll end up just moving back to my parents at this point. idk what to do anymore. I try and try and try, but nothing happens and I'm just done. the pressure is overwhelming and the sad thing is, I purposely decided not to visit my relatives/my grandparents this summer (the live in greece) thinking I "might find a job" and even if not, I don't have the extra money for plane tickets! they're extremely overpriced. and it's sad bc whenever I talk to my grandparents they say they miss me and how they're worried about me being unemployed. and my grandparents aren't the youngest anymore either (83 and 89) and I haven't seen then in a year, so that only saddens me more on top of feeling like an overall loser.

#young adult #adult life #real life #work life #personal rant #feeling lost #feeling depressed #Greek #i need a job and money #jobsearch #job seekers #the universe hates me #self pity

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angelthreat · 1 year

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Im so anxious for the new update I think I'm gonna fcking throw up.

#degrees of lewdity #dol #kylar the loner

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mickgaydolenz · 1 year

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so I wanted to find a dream for you from when I had just got into the Monkees because when I become obsessed with something I always dream about it at first so here is a Monkeemare

I was in my room messing around with a needle and thread, and by messing around I mean just sewing random buttons to the knees of my pants, (just so you know this was before I shaved my head so I have long hair and bangs bleh) and I ran my fingers through my hair and ruffled my bangs because that was the only way I knew how to style it. then I heard somebody knock my door really gently and I said they could come in and Davy walked in all awkwardly and sat next to me on the floor and kept trying to grab my hand, to like, hold? but at this point in time I was a pansexual in denial and only thought I was a lesbian so I just kept casually moving my hand away from him (also I just don't generally find him very attractive) but he got a hold of my hand and...just..fkcing held it. I couldn't sew buttons to my pants. then he asked me why I kept ruining my pants and began ripping the buttons off and stuffing them in my pocket and told me it was time to go and I couldn't go out dressed like that anyways. so here we are in a car. I was driving for some reason. and he turned that radio on and it was the news talking about a shortage in overalls? I'm pretty sure they were talking about overalls or something like that. but Davy looked really worried and anxious about it so he turned it off. then he turned to me and said "its right crazy, it is. I think I might have to sell me house." and I just nodded, I wasn't even looking at him. then we got to this hotel and Davy ushered me in to a room and wrapped his arm around my waist but he's so short and I'm very tall (5'9 versus 5'3) so his arm was dropped over my ass and in the hotel room was Peter who was reading with some very big glasses on, but he only greeted Davy and gave me an awkward nod and went back to reading. then Davy pulled me to sit with him and he asked where Mike was and Peter said "Mike? Mike-ity Mike Mike. Mic. Microphone." then went back to reading. wtf. wtf. wtf. I didn't know what to do. I was sitting awkwardly while Davy was basically groping me and Peter rhymed. then someone knocked on the door but right after they knocked they came right in and it was a cleaning lady but she was in one of those short ones? you know the ones I'm talking about right? kinda skanky and they'd never actually wear that as a cleaning lady? and she giggled and skipped over to me and fcking KISSED ME?? now Dream Raya must be one serious lady killer because seriously I get so much attention from chicks in my dreams, but anywho, she kissed me(😏) and dusted a lamp and left. then Davy winked at me (I don't know if it was because this was pervert dream davy or because I just made out with a beautiful lady so interpret that as you will) and then Mike came out of the bathroom holding his hat and greeted davy but didn't acknowledge me :/ the both of them ignored me for what? then Peter clapped his book shut and tossed it on the bed and asked us if we were hungry, then he ordered something from room service and (finally) Mike started talking to me and acknowledging my existence, and started telling me about his new girlfriend who was a cleaning lady here. now obviously I knew what this meant, so I didn't tell him his girlfriend just came in here and made out with me. but, Davy had other plans. he sat up and began laughing and said "she made out with ye girl!!" and Mike stood up too, looking at me like he was gonna kill me, and I'm sure he would have. so I ran away, he chased me, I ran down the street, he kept yelling from behind me that he was, and I quote, "GONNA BEAT MY FUCKIN ASS WHEN HE CAUGHT ME" and his long nimble legs were a match for my unathletic-ness, and he caught up to me. grabbed me by my shoulders and fell to the ground with me. then began (weakly like it was so fcking funny how poorly he was hitting me it didn't even hurt) hitting me, but I pushed him away and kept running, all the while apologizing for kissing his girlfriend, then a car drove past me and offered me a ride. guess who it was. Mr. Babbit. this dream...yeah. yeah.

BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

ahahagahahahaahhahaagha fucking WOW!!!! okay, fuck, all of that was incredible but i fucking LOVE the conclusion of you running away from CHAPSTICK because you fucking MADE OUT WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND!!!!!

#raya’s dreams :)#dude. buddy. pal. what an incredible dream #the monkees #rhubarb asks

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maliefizz · 1 year

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I wanted to tell someone, what i think is going on. But not sure. Just beeing dramatic.

But please, no judgment.

Neither for the idea itself, nor for my English, this isn't my first language. I'm sorry.

A little bit of "I don't fcking know either" and Religion, I guess?

______

What the f happened?

A short story of

"What happens with the Marauders?"

By Maliefizz

God has His helpers

All care for the existence and assignment of souls, bodies and families.

Sirius and James' soul was once one and the same, but the concentrated power of this soul was too much for a single human body.

Therefore, the helpers decided to share the soul and give it to a pair of twins.

Of course, God had to randomly control the work of the helpers.

Since he sees the Black family as not sane enough to have children at all, he wanted to deprive them of the twin children. However, the pregnancy had already progressed so far that it could not be completely stopped.

Separating normal twins and bringing them into different families is not really a problem, but God knew nothing about the soul separation of the two.

So he brought Sirius Black to the planned family and stowed away his brother James, in case the Black family should manage to have a child again

Shortly afterwards, about 4 months later, the helpers were looking for a suitable soul for the Potter family. It was planned that Regulus, a soul who could get along wonderfully with the pregnant woman of the Potters. So the helpers created a direct relationship between the Potter family and the little soul of Regulus.

During these 4 months, however, little James longed for his twin soul. It pulsates and pulsates until the helpers could no longer ignore it. This soul must come down to earth, it cannot stay here. The helpers were sure of this.

They wanted to bring the little soul back to the connection station, together with another soul that had lost its way.

The helpers just had no idea what effect it has when a soul gets lost. On its way alone through the kingdom of heaven, the soul spent a lot of time on the moon. This would drastically change Remus' life.

After saving Remus' soul from the moon and picking up James' soul, they began mediating both.

However, they did not know the consequences of their actions. Again.

One soul, anxious and lost, the other searching and doubting, builds a connection. And thus also that twin soul, which has already made its first experiences as a human being.

Both were mediated in a timely manner

Welcome home, James Potter.

Welcome home, Remus Lupin.

You will meet again

God was beside Himself.

Simply send the divided soul to Earth, to a family that had already established a connection with another little soul.

God did everything in his power to ensure that little James Potter was well received by the family of Regulus Black. However, the little person was still as pulsating as in heaven, and caused enough sensation. But he was able to fend for himself well.

But now the helpers had a new problem.

The little soul Regulus, who now could not go to his family.

The Black family, who are now expecting their second child, and James, the right soul for this job, is already on Earth

The helpers acted quickly and brought. They put the lost soul of Regulus to Sirius and hoped that the connection to the Potter family through Regulus, would have a positive effect on Sirius.

They didn't know, that the Potters will be sirius Family as well at some point.

The brotherly protective instinct, as well as the subconscious perception of the radiance of his twin soul through the union of Regulus and the Potter family, made Sirius the Living Shield for his brother.

It would take 10 years for the souls to meet again.

All together.

The twin souls feel their existence

Also the previous connection of the lost soul and the searching soul showed up quickly, so that the 3 met.

A little soul feels the connection of the 3 and wants to join it. Nothing is more intimate than a soul connection, and the soul of Peter Pettigrew appreciates that. He just doesn't know how difficult it is to be equal to a soul connection. However, he will experience this and his paths will be influenced by it.

A year later, after three souls strengthened each other, the fourth soul joins in.

Regulus arrives

James Potter, who has allied himself with Remus Lupin.

James Potter, who is the twin soul of Sirius Black.

James Potter, who ended up in the family of Regulus Black

Remus lupin, who through this one connection may call both twin souls his own. One in life and one in love.

Regulus black, who by chance became the brother of Sirius.

Regulus, who by chance is not a Potter.

Regulus, who therefore had to live his life as a Potter under the circumstances of the Blacks.

Sirius and James, both of whom are unable to be a Black but both were supposed to.

And Remus lupin, whose life is shaped by these three souls.

And the moon.

First to leave earth again is the young Potter.

At least it should be.

He is connected to Earth as Potter.

But he lives as Black

He dies for Potter.

Regulus

After that, the one who became a Potter instead, leaves us.

The deepest love.

Something he has always had to wait for since he is only a little soul,

He dies for them.

James

Next, they come together again.

A small spirit that cannot live without its connections.

A soul that has witnessed too much injustice.

A ghost that now returns to its twin and brother.

Sirius

And last but not least, our moon remains.

He found his first walk in the moon, and thought that this must be like his last.

He survived every moon walk.

And he, too, dies for his love.

The little soul, which is now allowed to rest.

Remus

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