#i think i'd be happy if i just never experienced a Thought tm ever again though

[foolishnpd]

i simply cannot have a normal positive reaction to anything normal happening ever T_T

#lilyroaring #actually npd #actually narcissistic #npd safe #i'd detail but it's actually the most loser behavior on earth #green with petty envy and unjust paranoia #i have to be less insane about everything #maybe i didn't fully cycle through my emotions from yesterday a thousand times over to exhaust them yet #or my mother explicitly telling me she's not gonna pay much attention to me soon #but i am just being so hypersensitive today #like wow good job making up things that don't exist and getting upset about them??? dumbass #ahhh i don't even know what i'm feeling #i think i'd be happy if i just never experienced a Thought tm ever again though #WHATEVER I'M GONNA GO DRAW and if it comes out even slightly badly i think i'll just consider suicide :D

[system-of-a-feather]

Can DID be completely cured? Bc I heard that even with final fusion it’s difficult to maintain. And your brain can always slip off n stuff

Eh... Most would say "no" but I like to say "depends on your definition of cured". Like even with final fusion, you can end up splitting still, that is true (at least from what I read / hear) but I think a lot of the flaw in the logic / commentary of that stems from the poor choice of words of "final fusion". As a system that is aiming for "final fusion" I really don't think that looking at final fusion as a "solution for having alters" is going to get you much of anywhere - nor is approaching it to "remove / only experience one alter" or "to become a singlet".

I think a large appeal of final fusion in itself would be the ability to have all parts co-exist and co-front coherently at once so that all parts can enjoy life and their existence at all times 24/7 and so there is much less need for "compromise" or "giving others time". It's much more like the ability to wholey share and less than anything "final" or a "fusion".

And I think a lot of the approach of going towards final fusion really has a lot of detatchment and relaxation from the strain and stress of having multiple selves and just slowly learning to exist in harmony.

It's hard to put into words cause I haven't thought about it much since it's over the bridge a mile away, but I don't think that if we split after reaching final fusion that it would be really considered a "relapse" or proper "breaking" in the sense that I don't think it would really be so much "my DID is acting up again" but more so that I have been through something traumatizing and thus am experiencing PTSD - and DID is just the way my brain has developed to cope with it, if you get what I mean.

I dunno. I haven't thought too much about it. Either way, I went on a bit of a tangent cause I personally disagree largely with the sentiment behind the line "even if you reach final fusion you can still split" because I hear it a lot in people who are against / scared / anti-final fusion and while I understand where that statement comes from, it is missing a lot of the point and actual value / meat of what final fusion can provide.

Back to the main topic, I think to talk about DID being "completely cured" is honestly a bit black and white and - for a lack of better words in my mind atm - "doomer" mentality. A lot of psychiatry and psychology like to call "hard and difficult disorders" like DID and BPD "uncurable" and all, but I'd wager to say no mental illness is "curable" to the levels they like to claim because mental illness isn't really a well defined concept and anyone who tries to define it is going to be ableist and bordering on 10,000 levels of various forms of bigotry since the definition changes by culture and age group and everything.

Will you look like a Normal Person TM and act like a Normal Person TM and think like a Normal Person TM? Probably not.

Would you have ever looked like / acted like / thought like a Normal Person TM even if you never had DID? No, probably not - cause the "Normal Person TM" doesn't exist.

I think the better question is "can you live a happy life where you function well, have the skills to care for yourself and pursue your life goals and just have a very fulfilling life you want" is a better question than "completely cured" and that, that is an absolute YES.

With where I am, I don't really care too much one way or the other whether my alters stay or not. I just want us all to have a good and enjoyable life and as far as things go, I definitely see that in our future one way or the other.

Not to get too much into syscourse, but this is largely why I don't identify with plurality. Plurality is barely an important factor or aspect at all in my experience of my disorder. I don't think about it or really care about it much beyond the happenstance that I share an existence with my brain family. I have very very little care weighted into "being plural" and personally don't think it's anything special - thus in my mind it also has very little to do with DID beyond being a red herring. It's far more a side effect of something entirely seperate, a flashy side effect, but a SIDE effect nonetheless.

-Riku (Host)

#alter: riku #ask #asks #actuallydid #dissociative identity disorder #healing #recovery #syscourse tw #final fusion