#i make transphobes uncomfortable

[patron-saint-of-lesbeans]

Very interesting (concerning) that while there’s a general consensus of “of course there’s queer Muslims and Jews and Christians we love them!” But that love is conditional. You can be religious but not too religious. You can be spiritual as long as it’s not actually that important to you. You can be observant of your religion’s dogma and traditions as long as you keep it away from everybody else.

But I don’t want to cut myself into smaller pieces. I don’t want to take a part of my life and culture and being and hide it away behind closed doors. It’s just…hypocritical and disappointing when people, who clamor about their love for the contradictory and self-authentic, hate when they’re confronted with it.

#tower of babble #catholic #lgbt #side b #sorry I saw a very good post pointing out the way queer Jews are often cited with the caveat that they’re not observant Jews #and how there are queer observant Jews but I didn’t want to derail so I made my own post #because fuckin hell how often do you see white queers telling queer Muslim women to stop wearing their hibjabi (unless it’s for ~cultural~ #purposes). it’s disgusting and demeaning to assume queer people don’t have deeply meaningful spiritual lives. #side b Christians 🤝 observant queer Jews 🤝 devout queer Muslims #me. happily trans and gay: I’m so happy and blessed to have this body and life - #homo/transphobes: you’re going to hell you’re evil you’re stupid you’re faking it #me: huh. oh. um. well I’m still blessed because I know you are not speaking with Christ in your heart- #a surprising number of self proclaimed radicals: uhhhh please don’t acknowledge that you’re Christian it makes us. uncomfortable. #me: …being uncomfortable and confused about others is the pride of Pride? the queer community thrives on contradiction and self definition? #anyways. prof put my pronouns down as he/she/they on the syllabus and I am popping the biggest gender affirming bottles tonight #(praying a chaplet and eating rice like the grad student peasant I am)

[carlyraejepsans]

saw your most recent post about really good fics that contain uncomfortable kinks and i immediately thought "ah, biscia must be reading the mpreg soriel fic" and almost left a reply talking about it but i stopped myself because i realized that would be an insane assumption to make. needless to say i felt so vindicated when i saw you link it in an earlier post.

like. HELLO?

HELLO???????

#answered asks #''I fear nothing good ever comes of it when it does'' is straight up SEARED into my brain as the toriel line of all time I've ever read #there's some character interpretations I don't share there. like i said i don't think either of them would cry that easily #and while the different conception (badumtss) of sex/gender in various monsters was interesting #i felt like it didn't quite deal with the ramifications of not strictly binary reproductions on social perception of gender like I could've #eg the part about boss monsters being closer to humans in how it works and thus having a different concept of mom/dad compared to skeletons #was pretty nice. but if you establish that skeletons work like ghosts but distinguish she/he ''for some reason'' even though all of them #can bear kids. and then you make a comment about ''the child possibly growing into a woman considering the shape of the pelvis'' it's like #why??????? why. whywhywhy. why would that be a factor. even hypothesizing a certain physical dimorphism. WHY pick the one tied to pregnancy #the ONE ASPECT that you decided was shared between both ''male'' and ''female'' skeletons #it's also like. objectively an argument that is leveraged to hurt and deny trans people irl so it was just. unbelievably uncomfortable #this is what we mean with mpreg and transphobia btw #not that the concept is inherently transphobic or hurtful to trans people #but that that kind of alternative biological worldbuilding implies an alternative social conception of gender role for the characters #that a lot of authors just. straight up miss. because their view of the world is still very cis/perisexist #BUT!!!!!!!!!! #it was still over all a very good fic. I'd rec it to pll not into that for the initial 2 chapters alone

[enden-k]

do urself and me a favor

dont follow me if you genuinely hate al haitham. dont follow me if you dislike kavetham. im gay and rlly like hthm so if you feel disgusted by this or my ramblings or when i draw kvthm or any other queer stuff, unfollow me and get well soon

#too tired to even explain what prompted this just read this and go away if anyones a homophobe/transphobe/etcetcetc #ill never understand why some ppl are like “WELL i dislike this character/ship/gay ppl in general but ill follow anw” #you dont have to like them (hthm/kvthm) but it makes no sense following me then #and if you genuinely hate them even less (especially hthm) so just go #also not liking character ships is absolutely valid and understandable but dont tell queer self shippers to stop “turning” ur favs queer #“this character is not gay stop making him gay it makes me uncomfortable as a self shipper 💔” #ah okay so im not allowed to ship myself w him bc im gay and it makes het self shippers uncomfy seeing their favs “turned” bi/gay #let ppl hc and dream its lit not harming anyone #and if harmless/queer stuff bothers you sm im sry but then it sounds like youre just an asshole #babbles #tbd

[eatingsomegreeneggos]

A lil transmasc Dakota to celebrate pride 🏳️‍⚧️ Stay safe out there my lovely trans people! 💖

#my art #fanart #pride #transgender #transmasc #disney #mml #milo murphy's law #mml fanart #dakota #vinnie dakota #mml dakota #trans dakota #trans rights #wanted to make some rep for the transmascs who havent gotten or dont want to get top surgery #also for those who dont wear a binder or also like its summer right ive heard those things are uncomfortable right now #so yeah biiig shoutout to you fellas <3 #stay safe out there ily #im not trans so if i got anything wrong feel free to educate me!!! ☺️ #ive just been having a dealing with so many transphobes it makes me so sad which is why i wanted to make something uplifting and nice

[thedreadvampy]

btw about Neil Gaiman I periodically agree with the 'Neil Gaiman is annoying' stuff bc I feel like both he and Amanda Palmer seem like people who I would go insane stuck in a room with bc we have very different ideas about art and suchlike. and I also do think that the career trajectory he's on lately is cynically redoing his greatest hits and pretending that was the dream all along when it clearly was not. which is at best meh.

having said which

as far as I can tell by far the most common complaint about Neil Gaiman is "Snow, Glass, Apples is problematic/gross/it's got incest and rape and frames the child as the aggressor"

which strikes me as a weird complaint to pull out of a 40 year body of work tbh when that short story is pretty clearly coming from a place of 'how far can I push this'. like you don't have to like the story. I don't really like the story. but it is. a horror story.

like and this is the thing with particularly 90s alt horror right? a lot of the interest is in transgression and sitting in the worst possible perspective and seeing what happens if you pull those strings. like I really like Clive Barker for example but there's a good chunk of his short stories that I'm like I'm not picking up what you're putting down Clive this seems Kinda Off. but that willingness to write some trite or Bad Message horror fiction that doesn't land is imo a side effect of being willing to try writing uncomfortable and unpleasant fiction at all. which is what horror is for, among other things, it's for creating discomfort as a form of catharsis or engagement.

like I am not a huge fan of the type of sex-horror that pops up in a lot of Gaiman's work and other contemporary horror writers - to me I don't find it upsetting or horny it just ends up feeling kind of edgy and tryhard - but I'm also a bit like. it does seem like a lot of people's beef with Neil Gaiman is that In The 90s He Was A Horror Writer

and this approach to Problematic Horror in Snow, Glass, Apples I find kind of microcosmic of how The Discourse often approaches art in this kind of 1:1 way. if you write a story which seems to line up with rape apologia it can only be because you agree with it. if you write a story about transphobia you're a transphobe. if you write a story that makes me genuinely uncomfortable you're attacking me.

but artwork, especially art like horror that's not necessarily trying to provoke enjoyment as its main response, is necessarily hit and miss. and if what you're shooting for is discomfort then whether it works, falls flat or goes too far incredibly depends on your audience. and making good art - as in art that makes its audience think, art that opens the audience up to discomfort and catharsis and sticks with them and changes them - requires the space to experiment and tbh the space to fuck up. like they aren't all going to be winners and they certainly aren't all going to work for you as a singular audience.

personally I don't see the appeal of Snow, Glass, Apples, less cause it's nasty and more cause it's hack. ooh an edgy monstrous version of a fairy tale where there's lots of rape and cannibalism? you're soooo original Neil. but like. that's fine. I don't really vibe with like 70% of Neil Gaiman stuff I've read but I still like Neil Gaiman because the stuff that works for me really works for me.

idk I think there's a lot of folk on this website who shouldn't interact with horror cause they clearly aren't interested in being horrified. that's not everyone who dislikes Snow, Glass, Apples, but it's a real undercurrent to a lot of the criticism and tbh this kinda vibe is shit for art. making standout art What Is Good also requires being ready to make art which stands out for the wrong reasons. sometimes they'll be the same art to different people.

#red said #not to Cancel Culture this but isabelle fall springs to mind in a lot of how folks talk about stuff like this #like she wrote a transgressive piece exploring her own negative feelings about transness and her anger around a transphobic trope #and she made something which i found really resonant and interesting #and she got torn apart for it because it Might From Some Angles Agree With Transphobia #and I'm not making a direct comparison. because i think attack helicopter is a really GOOD story and i think SGA is gratuitous and hack #but that's the thing right? transgression and discomfort and speaking about unpleasant things in an openended way are KEY #to making art that engages directly with your own pains and angers and discomforts #and that's hard to mediate tbh. but it's also very necessary. #i think as well thinking about Gaiman this is also a thought I've often had about Amanda Palmer #who over the years has written a lot of songs about things i find genuinely uncomfortable or offensive. #and i can engage with 'it's fucked up to tell your ex they transed their gender At You' or 'your partner's suicide is not about you' bc yeah #but #you can't celebrate someone for making confessional music then get mad because you don't like everything they confess #if you only take about your socially acceptable thoughts it's not really confessional is it? #if you only talk about discomforting things that people are comfortable hearing about its not really discomforting #and you can only really discern what's Good Transgressive and what's Damaging Transgressive through doing i think #so if you want challenging art you are going to have to get some art which challenges you and you go hmm no i still disagree #is what i think #so yeah you can hate the artwork but when an artist is specifically setting out to make challenging art it's weird to hate them #for making 50 pieces of art you like and 1 you hate

[sensazioneultra]

not to like complain all the time and on more than one blog lmao but god being trans can be so lonely like. everywhere

#irl. online. it's like damn so many ppl hate us? #cause why have i been getting transphobic anons on both blogs AND in both languages i speak #do y'all have nothing better to do #does it make you happy to be a fucking dick? just wondering #i've been thinking of moving blogs bc i just feel uncomfortable and like this happens every couple of years it's so #not JUST bc of transphobia i'm also just like that. i feel suffocated after a while on the same blog. too many ppl etc #but also tbh i don't think i'd want to remake rn if i didn't feel like transphobes keep coming after me #it makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe and i've even gotten anons about personal shit i post like questioning me on my trauma #which isn't fun and i use my tumblr as personal blogs but now every time i post anything i feel like i'm being watched? which doesn't like #feel great bc i already deal w paranoid thoughts about being watched and this feeds into them and fucks up w my brain! not fun #sorry for the rant but i'm tired of this

[badolmen]

Wrote out a big long phone call rant to have with my mother later because as much as I hate it she is my closest irl spiritual confidant 👍 here’s hoping her response to ‘hey I’ve been spiritually depressed and disconnected for like 8 months and for some reason these last two weeks advocating for Palestine has me feeling alive and burning with divine passion and love in a way I’ve never felt before in my life’ isn’t like. ‘Talk to your psyche abt your meds hun’

#ra speaks #personal #religion #oh god these tags got out of hand. look away I’m rambly today. #outing myself as deeply spiritual and devout on main oops #‘aren’t you gay and trans and -‘ listen Israel the person received that name after literally wrestling with gd in the desert #I’m allowed to put my faith leaders in a spiritual headlock for past and present crimes while I live my joyful life #maybe a physical headlock too. I’m down to body slam some wueerphobic racist pos who claim to be faithful while never exercising such faith #also lmao of the idea of a queer leftist being deeply spiritual makes you uncomfortable…bro everything about me makes ppl uncomfortable #I’m bi gender I consider myself a trans gay man and a nonbinary dyke at the same time. I’m disabled and ugly and autistic. im not palatable #accept the inherent apparent contradictory nature of the varied human experience and move on. #sorry thought about that post complaining abt observant jews being excluded from the conversations about queer jews like #you don’t have to get it. you don’t have to think it’s real! but it’s real to me! it’s important to me! #so are you gonna be my transphobic uncle and call me sick and deluded the same way he talks about trans people? #or are you gonna keep your mouth shut accept that you don’t have to understand someone to respect them and move on with your life. #anyways uh. here’s hoping I don’t lose my voice or start crying like I did while typing the script up. #vocational woes

[grison-in-space]

also I am grudgingly having to admit that it is at this point just fucking easier to use she and they interchangeably as far as pronouns go, based on the reactions I get when I don't bother to specify and then people flutter around and worry about it.

goddammit I'm going to have to actually interrogate my public identity label set. I hate that. hate having to figure out how to position myself formally in Discourse but I mean, if I'm gonna work in sex differences--currently a big part of my work--that kind of does need to be something I think about. augh.

#this is all very specific to me #in that I have stubbornly been going “no I'll stick with she/her because it's Easier” re pronouns for the past ten years #the way I conceptualize my gender doesn't treat male and female as binaries so much as like #places #addresses is my favorite metaphor really #genderqueer is comfortable in a way nonbinary is not because--oh. oh #because I hooked up “nonbinary” to “neutrois” back in the fucking day. okay. fine. #goddammit I'm stomping back to butch where I've lived for the past fifteen years so I can consider the implications #auuuugh right. right the main problem is the question of whether I ever bother to claim 'trans' alongside “gender non-conforming” etc. #which #I mean I know what my answer is whenever I run into some friendly little transphobia #which is fuck you how can I frame my existence in such a way as to make the transphobe as uncomfortable and morally dissonant as possible #the question is actually how I want to frame myself among friends. which is harder. because--ah hey there's all that old ace trauma flaring #eh. don't got to do it all at once. I can just casually offer to let people use whatever pronouns they want. #because let's be real they're gonna.

[cuntylittlesalmon]

lmao wait i don’t even know if wanna finish this book now

#just. recognizing that a word has been historically used as a slur and some people may be uncomfortable with it isn’t terf rhetoric 🫣🫣 #what is this fucking gay twitter circa 2018 🥴 #‘well it’s an important word because it includes trans people in my community’ huh? so does lesbian? #it’s like saying dyke isn’t a slur because it’s important to me 🫶 #not liking queer doesn’t make you a transphobe? huh? #maybe romance writers shouldn’t try to include one off jokes about lgbt discourse in your smut books 🫣🫣 cause none of y’all do it well #it’s not Trans Exclsuive Radical Feminisn rhetoric to recognize a historical slur as a slur this is so stupid #*insert that photo of the mom putting toys on the top shelf but it’s me with terf and the child is twitter queers* #you are not equipped enough to have discussions about transmisogyny if you’re using terf to mean ‘gay person i disagree with’ #fucking clown behavior

[germanboyyippee]

i'm not really a dr fan anymore but something that will NEVER stop driving me up the wall is the overlap in dr/persona fans where i would hear things like "oh no. chihiro's not a trans girl. [she] just hid [her] gender because [she] was insecure, didn't you play the game? didn't you see [her] dialogue? what do you mean the writers are transmisogynistic? chihiro said it in-game, 'i'm a boy now!'. [she] was never really trans. [she] was just insecure about being a weak boy. that's a common trope in these kinds of games! [she] even asked for help to stop hiding as a girl before [she] died, see, isn't it obvious? even [her] post-game content has [her] say it outright. why can't [she] just be a gnc man? can't men be feminine? just because [she] dresses up femininely doesn't make [her] a girl."

..................and then these same people would turn around and go "persona writers were so transphobic. naoto is obviously a trans boy". like Hey... hey. hey everyone. why don't we think about this for a second?

(i do not think either of these characters are cis. these characters are both very trans coded, chihiro as a trans girl and naoto as a trans boy. i am not saying these characters are cisgender. this is a post about transmisogyny in fandom)

#this is a legitimate argument i saw btw. the same people would say chihiro wasn't transfem and the writing there was not full of problems #and talk about how persona4 writers were transphobic with naoto's arc #and how him essentially detransitioning makes no sense #..adds the thing at the bottom against weird and bad faith arguments #bracketing chihiro's pronouns because it feels uncomfortable to not use she/her for her but obviously the people making that argument... #are not using she/her. #not sure if this is my place to post abt this because i am tme but it's something that i think abt sometimes #i also see similar arguments with june egbert. not the exact same bc june and chihiro are very different character/situations obviously #but that same stronggggg pushback against a transfem/trans woman character vs immediate accepted 'yay transmasc / man rep!'

[lunimy]

despite really liking the people i’ve been meeting and the school it kinda sucks being aro cuz i have to convince them i’m fine being alone forever and i’ve never had a crush on anyone and i don’t have a type without saying im aro bc people should let me be without having to add labels

#🌙.txt #there’s also this girl who is a little transphobic which sucks bc i’m not trans but i use she/he and it just makes me uncomfortable #she also keeps trying to hug me which is not fun for me #i don’t really like people hugging me when i don’t know them well

[arseniccattails]

"the problem with ter//fs isn't that they hate men" ok but disregarding the phrasing "the problem", as if there's only one, yeah it is though.

#'well they hate trans women' yeah 1) along with other people including men #2) they hate trans women because they hate men + they're transphobic so they think trans women are men #I get that it makes people deeply uncomfortable to acknowledge that actually transphobia is transphobic and it's instead #preferable for some to make shit up about how misogyny typically functions so that any transphobia against trans women has nothing to do #with perceived maleness #but your discomfort is unfortunately something you're gonna have to get over to engage with politics. sorry #ac speaks

[dgaftilwedie]

use to be friends with this guy who called me ableist for saying something was crazy and then proceeded to judge me for the things i do bc of my mental illness

#ex friend chronicles #whenever i say “i used to be friends with this guy” it is the same guy #i have so many stories abt him #like how he only addressed me with they/them pronouns before i came out #and as soon as i was like “hey i use they/them pronouns” he ONLY addressed me as she/her #he also blatantly refused to use it/its bc it was “dehumanizing” and “made him uncomfortable” #bro that's the point #im sorry it makes u uncomfortable?? #HOW R U TRANS AND BEING TRANSPHOBIC #MAKE IT MAKE SENSEEEEEE #and then he acted like it was my fault 💀💀 #ok bro #u dropped out in ur last year of high school #I DON'T WANNA HEAR IT. #ZIP. LOCK. #LMFAOAOAOAOA

[asordidbarwere]

first valentine's day in a long time that I have someone worth doting on and I'm wasting it feeling like shit about myself and my identity and everything else

#literally can't think about anything other than not feeling like i deserve to call myself trans #and how being called a lesbian makes me uncomfortable but being considered a lesbian brings my gf such joy #so if we're together wtf does that mean #i wish everything were easier #i feel like nothing compared to the transfem struggle #hatred isnt constantly weaponized against me #what right do i have to claim the trans identity at all #i hate being considered a woman but i do nothing to suggest I'm anything else #like i think i can just declare ''I'm a boy'' and have that mean shit #is there even a kind of masculinity that exists in this world that isn't just oppressive and violent #how can i say i admire those things and strive for them in front of someone who hates how it was expected of them their whole life #why am i so not okay with transitioning #why can't i do anything but live in fear #I'm going to fuck this up. i finally get to know what real love feels like and I'm going to sabotage all of it #I'm going to make them hate me and there's nothing i can do #it's just a matter of time #I'm scared that they'll go in hrt and it will make them unrecognizable to me as the person i fell in love with #and isn't that horrible of me? doesn't that make me as much of a transphobic monster as my ex #i feel like absolute shit. i wish I'd died in that car accident. i wish I'd never met someone who makes me so happy #so that i wouldn't have anything to fear losing or changing #i wish i didn't exist. i hate this whole fucking world #and also what disgusting level of privilege we all have to be giving a fuck about our genders while a genocide rages on #i wish i could wish for death but i don't wish for my gf to go through that loss #i wish i truly had nothing to lose. i don't deserve a damn thing

[dxringred]

don't go here presently, but going into the lesbian visibility week tag on twitter and before i see any ronance, i see art of trans ste/ddie twice instead. now don't get me wrong, i am all for trans headcanons, totally cool, and trans wlw couples are always valid! but when you take two male characters and make them trans just to plug your otherwise m/m fan ship during lesbian visibility week when the show has a canon lesbian character who's part of a popular f/f fanon ship (and has a canon love interest!), well... something about it doesn't sit right with me.

#ronance #from what i gathered #the two accounts dont generally represent #ste/ddie as trans but m/m #so like it literally was to plug essentially a m/m ship #during a week for LESBIAN VISIBILITY #while robin is literally right fucking there #i fear i'll be called transphobic for this but idk #idk it made me super uncomfortable esp. bc #of how much robin/ronance is Already ignored in favor of ste/ddie #despite the latter barely interacting in canon #again trans headcanons? trans wlw? trans wlw relationships? #all totally fucking valid !! #but making/headcanoning two male characters #as trans lesbians Just for this week feels...

[chaoticmayocat]

I've finally bit the bullet and got a doctor's appointment up here to try and get an HRT prescription. I'm not backing down on it, even if someone tells me my health issues are a risk. I'm filing my name change over the summer. The world is not getting kinder. My transition will not get easier. There is no surrender if I want to stay honest about myself.

#like its this or detransition at this point #i am in SUCH a red state #idk let your freak flag fly #except by this i mean I'm willing to risk dying for this #i am visibly queer and i will become queerer and that feels very scary right now #but in some way it feels comforting to know i'm proving so many people wrong and probably making so many transphobes uncomfortable #also. i just really want to pee in a public bathroom again. its been years #lgbtq #trans rights #transgender #trans #ftm #interjection in these tags but also #with all the awful things happening this year i so much want one thing i can say... yes im happy this happened #gay #bisexual #mayocat originals #transgender rights