#i literally made so many connections

[shrublee]

reminder to all frubbo fans who have also been making theories about creation lore

The movie Wall-E is about robots falling in love ROBOTS WITH AN S

#qsmp #qsmp tubbo #qsmp frubbo #qsmp creation #I will literally go into more detail about the connection between frubbo and this dang movie if anyone wants me to #as someone whos BEEN obsessed with the movie Wall-E before they watched it together #i literally made so many connections #like omg #im actually insane or smth like I need help #might talk about it anyways even if no one asks if I cant help myself anymore

[panikkar]

thinking about how the three of the biggest relationships in bucks life are pretty significantly tied to helicopters/helicopter crashes,,, (partially inspired by this post by @maygrcnt)

taylor kelly: met her when her news helicopter crash. not the first person he seriously dated but definitely is the most serious romantic relationship he had yknow. can’t forget the whole couch metaphor arc.

eddie: i mean it’s pretty self explanatory but eddie’s helicopter crash when he was in the army caused him to be discharged and forced to be reliant on his family again, which is what made him move to la, where, of course, he met buck. they’re literally thee most important person in each others lives. they’re besties. coparents (when the only help eddie’s had as a coparent is shannon, who left (no hate to her it’s complicated shit and she did die but still she did), and his parents, who were controlling and not what either of them needed and also just generally really shitty to eddie at the time (ESPECIALLY re his parenting). and then buck comes along and like within a year he’s like i trust you with my life and my son and my sons life! after everything!! and puts buck as chris’ legal guardian in his will—) n e ways yeah that but also eddie’s ptsd related to the whole helicopter crash incident was super significant later in their relationship too bc eddie was at his lowest point (a place he’d been before but back then, his wife left him and his parents actively made everything worse instead of helping) and buck just like. steps in WITH eddie and gives him what he needs and like takes care of eddie and chris in they way they both need instead of forcing them into what he thinks they need like eddie’s parents did. yeah. and eddie actually did some healing then unlike the last time. so eddie is easily the most important and serious and intimate (like platonically but also Not) relationship buck has ever had, more so than any of bucks gfs.

and then tommy comes around!!! a fuckin helicopter pilot. he and buck first meet not necessarily in a helicopter crash but in a helicopter. in an emergency situation. and they draw SO MANY parallels between tommy and eddie and taylor (he and eddie have a lot in common like with the whole army and martial arts stuff and they get really close really fast and then BUCK HIMSELF drawing the taylor parallels. literally biting at my enclosure.) and wow! look at that! they kiss (and soon start a relationship) and tommy is literally not only the first man buck has ever kissed, but also the catalyst for buck realizing he’s bi. (or, at least, that those feelings bucks had for men in the past (cough cough eddie) are like mushy romantic/sexual/Very Not Platonic things.) literally even if they just kissed that once and had no relationship past that it’s still a massively impactful (non)relationship for buck!!!

and somehow. somehow the most important relationships in bucks life are all connected to helicopter crashes/emergencies. and they’re only characters who have such big connections to said helicopter crashes/emergencies. and they all have relationships that are incredibly important and impactful to buck. this is literally canon.

#literally going insane over here #IT WOULD BE ONE THING IF HELICOPTERS WERE JUST SOME REGULAR SHIT IN 911 LIKE IDK CONNECTIONS TO VICTIMS OR DISPATCHERS BUT NO #THESE ARE THE ONLY THREE CHARACTERS CONNECTED TO HELICOPTERS LIKE THIS AND BUCK HAS (OR WILL) MADE OUT WITH ALL THREE #wait jfc am i imagining this or did lucy get ‘transferred’ to the lafd helicopter unit or whatever too #i can’t emphasize enough how insane that is #911 could be cancelled by now or be doing circling the toilet like many many shows do so far into their run (which is what s6 felt like #a lil bit to me) but abc took this show that’s past it’s prime running down and they’ve breathed so much life into it!!! #bc they’re giving the characters and their interpersonal relationships the attention that made the show special in the first place (and #also what i think it kinda lost in s6 a lil bit) #god i love this show #911 #911 fox #buddie #911 abc #evan buckley #911 spoilers #911 abc spoilers

[dennistakesamentalhealthday]

the nancy boy thing is just so fucking insane because like. they broke from the spelling of this name to do it but also incorporated it into the spelling of his name with n for nancy (possibly showing how he associates it with himself). but the license plate could have been any letter and that letter could have been any word and they chose b for boy. they could have cut to the license plate from any letter in dennis and they chose n for nancy. and we already know the way dennis spells out his name/words in this scene is very important metaphorically they showed us with that alternate D.E.N.N.I.S. system he gives us so.....they did that on purpose and drew attention to it

#after days of reflection (i went outside) im still a dtamhd defender but specifically for the writing #i think whether it works or not is another question but im there are so many little details and intentions and it is so fascinating to me!! #it brings out the writer nerd in me its made me push myself in my own writing #imo this episode is very tightly written when it comes to all these little details #and i dont think they would do all That with nancy boy for just no reason? it doesnt make sense from a writers pov #esp when the scene establishes the importance of dennis spelling things out #on a literal level hes trying to reach/connect to the person on the other side of the line. to be understood. and i think on an even more #internal level he's doing it to simplify + process whats happening and what he's feeling within himself #anyway still trying to have a little tumblr break but im sooo autistic about this one bit in particular

[yuridovewing]

sorry to post a negative wof thing but sometimes i remember the “morrowseer is moonwatcher’s dad but no one knows or cares, its just this quirky trivia thing” bit and get irrationally frustrated. like if you didnt have any ideas on what to do with that tui then you couldve just. not done it.

#it literally makes no sense why she shouldnt know beyond ‘’some stray thoughts her mom accidentally let out’’ either #like ok iirc secretkeeper was barring her own mind from her. however she did that #but youre telling me that No One Else ever thought about morrowseer and his crimes #none of the nightwings none of the rainwings no one ever thinks about the queens right hand man #who orchestrated crimes against dragonkind and ruined so many lives or was a hero to some of them #no ones ever spared that guy a second thought? #or like- did no one know secretkeeper was morrowseers wife? did no one connect the dots that her secret baby was probably morrowseers secret #secret baby? its not like no one knew she was pregnant with his kid right??? #NO ONE that ever looked at moon and directed hostile thoughts abt her that affected her self worth ever went ‘’oh shes morrowseers baby #of course SHE was spared our same trauma’’ #NO ONE HAS THOUGHT ABOUT HIS CRIMES???? NOT A SINGLE ONE??? #wouldnt this contribute to her mistreatment and anxiety since he used his supposed power to hurt and manipulate people?? #but…. no tee hee its this silly little bit of trivia we wont delve into #like. again…. you didnt HAVE to make morrowseer her dad!! #like it comes across like tui came up with the idea of having the new protag be related to the previous antagonist and thought it was cool #but then didnt have any real ideas beyond that so she just made it this weird unspoken ironic fact? #like…. no i dont think its this ironic scene that she finds his literal corpse in the volcano and doesnt know its him #and doesnt seem that horrified by it #she should see that and feel incredibly complicated and disgusted feelings

[licorishh]

Replayed Modern Warfare 3 2011 on Veteran tonight and goooooooood night. Blood Brothers never gets any easier to watch no matter how many times you've done it and the ending really never misses huh

I apologize for the amount of yapping in the tags I reread it all on mobile and started giggling because it went on for so long but eh. Blessed are those who won't shut the freak up and all that

#call of duty #modern warfare 3 2011 #i just. wow. wow wow wow wow wow #i've played these three games so many times over the last several years and i just. #they literally. never get old. #loose ends and blood brothers will never not make me cry and endgame and dust to dust will never not make me smile so hard #ending it with price smoking the cigar like he did in the first mission in the first game wHEN HE FIRST MET SOAP JUST UGHHHHHH. #i know y'all don't care but i don't care that y'all don't care i could literally yap about this until i shrivel up and die #i have never ever ever in my LIFE seen poetic justice played out so beautifully like it is at the very end #JUST. WOW. WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW. WOW WOW. WOW #they do not frickin make games like that anymore DADGUM #i also forgot how frickin sad down the rabbit hole is?? like jeez louise they didn't have much screen time but gosh #i also have never in my life heard such gut-wrenching anguish from a grown man in my life like price in that one scene #I KNOW Y'ALL KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT THAT MAN MAKES ME FULL ON S O B IN THAT PART HE HAD NO BUSINESS #anyway i'll keep cutely living in denial and pretending literally any of the main characters besides price and nikolai are fine <3 #foley and dunn and their team seemed just fine at the end of modern warfare 2 so i will accept that small mercy #at this point these games have taken everything else i love away from me so #y'all probably think i'm wild for how insane i get over these games but the nostalgia bit is a big part of it as well #like they're honestly in my opinion genuinely the greatest video games of all time #but the fact that i have that connection with my dad makes it so special #crazy cause he said he also cried in blood brothers and my dad is 54 and i have seen him cry one (1) other time in my entire life #heck infinity ward but also bless them i hope the devs live long beautiful wonderful prosperous delightful exciting fulfilling lives #Lord bless them and their entire bloodline for the contributions they have made to humanity not even joking #AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THE FREAKING SOUNDTRACKS DO NOT GO THERE OAUSYDJAKAKDN #MW2 AND MW3 CREDITS. EXTRACTION POINT. COUP DE GRACE. RETREAT AND REVEILLE. CONTINGENCY. PARIS SIEGE. PRAGUE HOSTILITIES. RUSSIAN WARFARE. #UGHHHHHHHGHHHH everything about these games is so unbelievably perfect and immaculate #i have got to get over my art block NOWWWWWWWWWW #makarov is also the best villain i've ever seen idc bro he's frickin awesome #i mean obviously he's horrible and a disgustingly evil human being but as a character he's stupidly well-written

[musical-chick-13]

Regarding the previous post, I think the way I approach trying to evaluate a piece of art is asking "Do I think the positive things I get out of it outweigh the parts of it that I don't like?" And when I call something a "guilty pleasure" song/show/book/piece of media/etc. it's really more in the sense of, "Given who I am as a person, the flaws I've found in this should be complete dealbreakers for me, but somehow they aren't, and it makes me feel like I'm having an identity crisis."

#like. I think something like...idk shiki or cxgf excels on multiple levels. I understand why I like them. given the things I look for in art #it makes sense that these shows would speak to me because they make the effort to showcase those things I look for. because the people #in charge of those works clearly valued the same kinds of things and cared about seriously exploring them. #but with something like. uh. ctrlz. that is NOT the case and I frequently found myself going 'why would anyone make this writing #decision?' but I still sat through all 3 seasons of it! I still really enjoyed it! those flaws SHOULD have made me give up according to #personal history but they never did. and I very very much genuinely question why. I have NO IDEA why I still care about this #silly convoluted teen drama show so much. but I do. I wrote SO MANY FUCKING POSTS ABOUT IT. #I really love wicked the musical. I've heard many people call it 'hokey' or 'cheesy' or 'objectively bad' but here's the thing! I DON'T #think it's bad!!! like literally at all!!!!!! and it does do some genuinely cool things in regard to the music and the way the characters #develop and what the show says about the nature of prejudice and human connection. is it like. idk Serious™ the way that something like #Parade is? no. but it doesn't have to be. it does what it sets out to do and it does it well and this is why the whole '''objective #evaluation''' thing doesn't actually mean anything. I value thoughtfully-constructed music and dynamic female characters #(which this musical has). I value stories that deal with the complex and messy feelings that come with being a human (which this musical #has). I value stories about 'other'ness and romantic subplots that aren't just built on 'This Girl Is Pretty' (which this musical has). #and I value professional displays of technical vocal ability because I know how fucking DIFFICULT that is (which this musical...if you cast #it well...has). #if you value something else in a musical then yeah you will probably think THIS one is '''objectively bad''' #if you don't see the point of musicals as an art form you will probably think wicked is '''objectively bad''' #do you see where the problem with categorizing analysis like this is??

[clonememesfrikyeah]

You know what would be the worst? If at the end of the war when all is said and done, after the clones lost every little thing they had, after Vaders rise and the Jedi’s fall, after all that death and hardship and misery? It would be terrible to be a clone and wake up like suddenly coming out of a coma, in a stasis chamber that they grew up in and rarely left, there was the craziest dream just before and there’s the lingering feeling something important just happened, this is Kamino 35bby, all the information they were just fed is already neatly stored in their perfect flash-memory brain. No ones died yet, all of that was a simulation based on a calculation of events to instal orders and hone the discipline of troops. It’s dark, there’s no way of telling if anyone or anything exists beyond the boundary’s of the inside. There’s a designated call sign and designation along with vitals displayed in the line of vision, it’s also counting down the seconds to when a new simulation is set to begin.

#as like a fanfic idea tho #how high am I? this high: #it’s like a matrix kind of deal #because even though the body is under the conscious mind is awake and active fully living years of time in minutes #and they’d be grown and raised in the tubes they were made in #never leaving until peak physical maturity has been achieved and there let out to learn physical skills #like building muscle and reflexes and social interaction and all that #imagine the new level of fucked up that would be #the clones would be robbed of literally everything #it’s also like everything everywhere all at once #the clones neural pathways and connected through wires so they get the same brain response they normally would when normally interacting #WTF am I even talking about no one is going to care about this this is random nonsense #tcw #the clone wars #Designation CT-7567 Call sign R-E-X slated rank Captain track 406 group 501 #and the entire war is one big simulation #only the prequels are cannon and everything is Freeform for all #so the clones lived a different war every couple minutes while in hyper growth tubes for 5 years so they learned from so many mistakes #this is me making the clones spartan like in an attempt to make them immortal because they would be the perfect weapon and person #imagine how crazy smart and unshakable they would be #clone troopers #the clones #captain rex #commander fox #commander wolffe #the prequel trilogy #arc trooper #star wars legends #the clone wars 2003 #rep com

[patrice-bergerons]

One of the many things Exeunt gets so damn right is its treatment of change that is foisted upon you against your will.

When you aren't particularly adaptable and happy in your little enclave, external forces uprooting your life can and does feel like the end of the world.

But Endeavour isn't the end of Morse’s story--sitting at that churchyard he may not know it yet but he will meet people who will come to mean so much to him; there will be so many more concerts and drinks with friends and convoluted puzzles to solve.

And still that doesn't (and won't) negate the grief of what he has lost, of the now past he can never return to again. It's such a hard balance to get right--to let us sit with that grief without sugarcoating it and yet with the knowledge that neither is it the end.

#itv endeavour #endeavour spoilers #exeunt #idk in 2019 when i was forced to leave boston - which was quite literally the only place i ever felt home - #it felt like the end of the world for me too #and now i have made new friends and found new favourite spots and met people and did things #i never thought i would #and yet- that trauma of that forced move is stjll an open wound in many ways #and i just connected to it so much in that regard #in how masterfully it inhabited that uneasy equilibrium #including even the Russian roulette #(me standing in dover staring down an unfenced cliff) #and yet. in the end. i did not want to die #and im so glad you know?

[warpedpuppeteer]

Guys I went on a date today and the guy is ex army, trained medic, has a St. Christopher's medal and an ex-wife (not a firefighter though). The way he talks about how he feels about one night stands and attraction was giving high-key demisexual vibes. This is extremely funny in so many ways to me. I basically went on a date with a version of Eddie Diaz. 😭 I didn't even think about it until now as I was writing a fic about Eddie and his St. Christopher's medal and was like...PAUSE wait a damn minute.

#personal #eddie diaz #but bootleg version #it was a lovely date though and there were so many hijinks #it was so silly and I'm exhausted beyond belief #my boots literally fell appart as we were walking #those boots were not made for walking #I had to buy ugly convenience store flip flops #in fact the entire date was like a cliche rom-com #it was so silly how many things went wrong but i still felt good at the end of it #anyway completely unnecessary sharing but I've been laughing about the fact that i made a connection between my date and eddie diaz

[vordemtodgefeit]

i got a high 1st in my classics creative project!!!!!

#the assignment was to create your own ‘classical reception’ and then write an accompanying essay on why you made these creative choices #literally all assignments on this module were open-ended or specifically chosen from a shortlist of subjects #so naturally i made all of mine connected to iliadic reception because who do you take me for #i wrote the creative piece on helen and worked as many trojan war readings in there as i could #(to the point where the marker said that he was really impressed at how far i had read around the ancient reception without being asked to) #we use a 20 point system and I GOT A 19 #it’s the best mark i have EVER gotten at university so far #i’m so happy this assignent meant so much to me #classical studies #classical reception #tagamemnon

[godsfavoritescientist]

How do I explain the ways in which the bill origins fic 'A Romance of Many Dimensions' by haley3 rewired my brain without needing to give paragraphs upon paragraphs of context. The fic is something like 200,000 words long. Almost every single good moment calls back to things that are set up earlier in the fic

#godsrambles #girl help 'the colors in our universe are the same as the ones in his home dimension because our universe is made out of a piece of bill' #makes NO sense without adding way more context #not to speak of 'bill is obsessed with ford because he can Feel the same cosmic thread connecting them as the one that drew him towards- #-meeting his henchmaniacs which makes him convinced against all odds that ford is gonna join him' #and the long beginning is set in flatland. its what finally got me to read the book flatland #and now I will literally think to myself 'its not that i Have to do x or y tasks. i GET to do x or y tasks isnt that great' #'i get to live in a physical form that experiences so many vivid thoughts and sensations while on bills favorite planet in the multiverse' #and i will be like 'why should i drag my feet about learning this or doing that. bill was literally trapped in a 2d world-' #'and KILLED to be able to experience a life as 3d and colorful as the one im in' #'and just like bill was so desperate to learn and see and do Everything that the axolotl gave him a ton of power so he could do that.' #'i Also want to learn and do and see everything i possibly can. and i literally HAVE the chance to do that' #'so i'd better start actually Trying to do and see and learn everything i can' #and then i brush my teeth slightly more often or whatever #fucking unhinged and ridiculous way of getting myself to do tasks #the events of this fic arent even my headcanon for bills powers and backstory. i just think its neat! #and now my brain has been permanently rewired by a got dam fan fic. #anyways sorry for all the spoilers but i mean. i doubt many folks would decide to read a fic that long without being intrigued by spoilers #most frustrating thing is that the hard hitting spoilers SEEM understandable without context. #but i promise there is a lot of context missing that makes it make sense why they are good plot points and not just weird random happenings #edit: its 200000 words not 600000. how did I misread that

[disco-lizard]

Tagged by @unintent, THANK YOU BELOVED 🧡

Name 4 songs that you consider YOURS. Songs that no one else understands like you. Songs that they can try to pry from your cold dead hands:

mine are:

star treatment by arctic monkeys (painfully obvious, my alternates for this are there'd better be a mirrorball or the ultracheese. don't ask me abt any of these unless you're prepared for me to get deeply vulnerable and personal)

my own soul's warning by the killers (this has become a sort of anthem for me i guess, i feel a weird almost spiritual connection to the lyrics)

mama by genesis (this encompasses childhood for me)

there, there by radiohead (a song my brother told me to listen to years ago and it's been one i have held dear ever since. we both sat in silence when he played it for me and it brought tears to my eyes, still does. it's a very special memory)

idk who to tag, there aren't many of you following this blog but if you see this and wanna do it then go for it!!

#i tried to pick ones i haven't talked abt before.. i say that but i've talked extensively abt 1 and 2 💀 #could've tossed red eyes by the war on drugs OR lightning riders by awolnation in there #i have a strong emotional connection to way too many songs HUFDIHGDS #i literally made a playlist of my ultimate faves so i could narrow it down but there's 30 songs on it 😭

[peaceoutofthepieces]

i very much don’t feel like i’ll ever revert from the mindset that i don’t want to be involved in any sort of fandom space ever again but damn do i miss the community and conversation sometimes

#i just want to talk about heartstopper!!! #and fics and gifsets etc etc #and i have no one in my life who wants to #i used to get asks so frequently in some other stages of my tumblr life #and i love literally nothing more #and now i feel very silent here #and also #i very much miss having a close connection to someone #who loved my hyperfixation as much as me #and wanted to talk about it as much as me #and felt as many feelings about it as me #and was my biggest cheerleader and supporter in everything creative i done around it #that i shared my writing and everything with CONSTANTLY in the only way that ever made me happy and not anxious #but i also feel a bit traumatised by the collapse of that connection! #which is probably the main reason i no longer want to get *involved* actually #such is life

[famewolf]

if im being honest and allowing myself to vent a bit about it ... another red flag was when the DM went 'wow i love the detail of your backstory but idk what i can do with it tho ):'

#[static] #it immediately made me feel bad for trying to make a character work with the aesthetic she had given us tbh #i could already tell she didnt seem to be super character story driven so i just made a pretty simple drifter-type #for a post-apocalyptic setting n such and made a group that tied into the whole over-arching premise #i also literally just did bullet points cuz i could tell she wasn't gonna want to read one of the backstories i usually do #and as someone who has mostly dm'd in the past i did my v best to make a character that was super easy for the dm to incorporate in any way #like a solid reason for being there a reason for wanting to adventure with strangers a reason for seeing the mission through no matter what #made a whole small faction and connected them to the overarching theme and plot in multiple ways #wrote down lore and npcs she could use for the faction if she didnt want to make up her own #like all the works and all i got was two sentences back about it ... one of them being like 'cool but i dont like the extra details' #aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh #ok im done yelling now i just need to vent for a second #i feel bad for feeling kinda bummed about the experience because this is the first time i got to play at a physical table in years #and i know how hard it is to DM #but also when you come to the table with zero notes for the first session its ... probably gonna be disappointing jkfghdf #i DID have fun however because the party banter was hilarious and it was fun getting to hang out with ppl! #but communication between DM and players was not great #also let me be clear she did like that i made so many connections and hooks into the story and it helped her a lot #she was NOT interested in my character's past like ... jobs or npcs #but also u could just Not say anything about it and just be like 'sweet cool thanks for the info' LMAo

[jvzebel-x]

"And so the Hawaiians look at all of nature as important, and they look at the signs of nature as messengers coming from their family who has passed on. Signs come in rainbows, double rainbows, odd forms of clouds, they read the roll of the waves and some of the waves are signs that they look at, you know. Those are things that the Hawaiian needs to be aware of in order to fulfill its connectedness to, you know, to its ancestors that have passed on.

So we cannot separate ourselves to the trees, we cannot separate ourselves from the waves and the ocean, from the clouds and its cloud forms, from the mountains and the hills, the animals from the limu, to the pipipi, to the kūpe‘e, you know, to the manō, to the pueo, to the ‘i‘iwi, to the ‘o‘o, all of these are all signs upon which we had better be aware of, because it is through them that we get messages from our ancestors."

"Oh yeah, sharks do. Sharks, the significance of a shark, especially with the niuhi, the tiger and the white shark, they were compared to as chiefs. Kamohoali‘i, who was the brother of Pele, was a shark. That was his form, his other kinolau or his other form was a shark. Because of the ferocity. The same kind of attitude of absorbing and taking all with no consciousness to end result, the main thing is to consume. The same attitude is compared, comparing the shark to love. It’s all consuming. To the point where one cannot think consciously to what is being done. And so the Hawaiians have a saying:

Kūpau wau i ka manō ka manō nui ka manō nui kūpau wau i ka manō.

And it means, “I am finished to the big shark, all consumed by the big shark, I am finished.” It doesn’t mean he’s dead because the shark bit him. It means he is so deeply in love that he doesn’t know how to think, you know? So shark has that other side of its attitude that is used by the Hawaiians to describe the all consuming idea, without consciousness. And that is funny that the Hawaiians would also compare that to love. But they did that because they knew nature. Hurricane ‘Iniki, all consuming, it has no bearing on who’s the chief or who’s the commoners, you know. It’s all consuming. Hawaiians understood that, and they used that kind of proverbial idea, and I just use that to illustrate the insight and connectedness with nature. But in relation to the shark, that is how it is really used."

x. Parley Kanaka'ole, "Hawaiian Waters: House of the Shark"

🦈

#:))) #so i found this interview from Hawaiian icon Parley Kanaka'ole&it made me so happy for so many reasons lol #so here are some of my favourite parts. :'))) the full interview actually talks a lot about the beliefs we have surrounding our 'aumakua #&is an incredible read. if you are kanaka reconnecting w the culture however i do have the warning that #he speaks rather definitively&heavy-handedly about how one can reconnect w your kūpuna+'aumakua #&just take it w a grain of salt. as w a lot of our older figures he has standards for kānaka that are genuinely not feasible sometimes #&its okay. it doesnt make you any less kānaka or make it impossible for you to commune&connect w your 'aumakua. #your geneology hasnt forgotten nor abandoned you for lack of attention+relation bc that isnt possible. #however w that one caveat in mind i highly reccommend reading the interview (&also the second piece by #Herb Kane who is a literal Hawaiian legend. his art is regularly used in classrooms to teach history&hes been actually dubbed #a Living Treasure of Hawai'i when he was alive. also he CAPTIANED the hokule'a. actual legend.) #ive been missing home. so much. #salt water cures everything. i have tears&sweat i just need the pacific lol. #♡ #yas

[scattered-winter]

as lonely as being aro can be I honestly wouldn't have it any other way because as a kid I felt like my life would be over in my 20s once I married and started having kids but the first time I realized I didn't have to do that shit was akin to a bird getting released from its cage

#like idk. i remember watching my mom growing up. no time to read or paint or sing or do anything she wanted to do #because she was always doing chores and housework and taking care of the kids #and she said she chose that life and was happy with it but it felt like a cage to me every time i thought about it #and in the ''religion'' i grew up in anyone with ovaries was supposed to get married and have lots of babies as soon as they could #so yk. 20s. #and as a kid growing up in that environment i Literally thought i would only get to live for 20/25 years #and then i'd be miserable and locked inside the house for the rest of my life #and all my friends growing up Wanted that !! they wanted marriage and a million kids and all the things we were told we needed to have #and im sure a lot of this was just the culture we grew up in. even now after leaving years ago im still struggling to unlearn things #and as kids ?? we didnt know Anything. #but idk. i remember watching brave and connecting with merida so much because i didnt want to get married either !!! #but i thought i had to !!! literally that movie made me cry so many times fr #but finding out what aromanticism was was literally so insane it was like. i dont have to do any of this bullshit actually. #it was literally the most radical thought i'd ever encountered at the time #it felt like i was defying everything i've been taught and it took me a long time to separate myself from the mindsets i grew up with #and then longer still to eventually separate myself from that environment completely #but idk. im a little lonely sometimes and my siblings and friends are all getting married and paired off #but i dont have to. my life isnt over and i can live it however i want. #idkkkkkkkk im feeling kinda emotional rn. being aro is incredible fr #winter speaks #queer #personal