#i know that's probably selfish

[jagerstian]

The world doesn't have to revolve around me, but I'm tired of being the moon. I don't want to only be adored when I'm at my peak. I don't want to be forgotten once the clouds roll in.

I almost want to be the sun, constantly sought after and loved. I want people to bask in the warmth they find in my presence. I want to be part of the reason a good day is good. I want people to be willing to go out of their way for my company. But I don't want to burn.

Maybe I want to be the ocean. To have people drawn to me from all over, at every point of me. Beside me, on my surface, in my depths. For a photo of me to be kept on your phone, your computer, framed in your halls, kept in your wallet. The memories of me to be so cherished, to be part of the highlights of your life. I want to pull you so far under my waves you drown and we'll drift for a lifetime.

The world doesn't have to revolve around me, but I wish I was loved more.

#i know that's probably selfish #but im tired of pretending im satisfied with scraps #because im not #i want to be sat at the table and to have dinner with you #im sick of telling myself “it could be worse” and “if i was actually unwanted i wouldnt be let inside the house” #that may be true but im still being treated like a dog when im a person #normally i love how big my heart is #and how much i just... LOVE #but its hard #i care so much #i give and i give and i give until there's nothing left of me TO give #it's supposed to be give and take. Balance. A performance even #so why am i the only one on stage?

[marioyuri]

Theyre so cute

#i know this is old comics probably before the selfish daffy era so hes been nice the entire time but ive decided hes nice to road runner #hes literally only nice to road runner and his kids actually. fuck everyone else #literally like family to eachother #looney tunes #road runner #daffy duck

[ministarfruit]

having normal thoughts about the demon king today

#long post #vtuber #holostars #holotempus #regis altare #doppelgänger gave me flour and I made bread #I love writing villains that don't have a choice but to be a villain #do you understand me #the demon king was created to be evil. he doesn't have a choice #and he knows he's going to lose it all because that's how he's been written #and yet he's an evil version... of a hero? #I think he envies altare personally #because altare gets to choose whether to be good or evil #but the demon king doesn't get that choice #he was born evil and he will die evil too #yet he sees altare having fun with the guild and getting the recognition a hero gets #and he's like... why was I born this way? #why wasn't I born in a world where I could be happy? #yes the demon king is selfish and cruel and violent #and he probably wouldn't change if given the choice #but he was robbed of any other option #he is well and truly alone. while altare lives surrounded by people who love him #and the demon king has to WATCH THAT #he has to WATCH his mirror self enjoy life while he rots in his castle #with nameless servants that don't care about him #then the fire prince destroys everything he owns #AND he knows his entire universe is going to vanish after the season ends. because their world is disposable. including him. #ugh. villains who have no choice but to be villains <3

[clownsuu]

Man I wonder how Octavio felt when he saw that Cuttlefish is now a living strip of squid jerky

Ain’t gunna stop him from bein pissed smhhhhhh

#Would probably say same thing Craig said to him when he would be in the ol fuckin snow globe hdhdHHDGDGC #Aka “isn’t he cute” in the most condescending way possible dhudHHDGD #Splatoon #dj octavio #captain cuttlefish #splatoon spoilers #Also I love there is a bunch of people who sees Octavio as just a gay mans #Absolute legend he looks intimidating and spooky and has even committed some crimes #But it was all for the sake of his people smhhh #He even knows that he’s selfish in a way for that #Also m a n I do n o t remember Craig being such a shit head to octarians #Like he should know better tf they used to be allies 🧍‍♂️ #That’s the English version anyway idk about the direct dialog he has from japanese #smhhhhhhhhh

[compacflt]

So one of the things that made me cry (and laugh) the most, when reading the whole series was in Debriefing when Ice has surgery and Mav kisses him on the forehead, then Ice types out “I am cured” with like no punctuation. (Because of course Ice is the punctuation man 99% of the time.)

One, Ice is actually so fucking funny with the “I am cured.” Like no one would believe how funny he actually is. (And I headcanon that Mav knows this, of course, but almost no one else believes him. Which drives him up the wall.) Two, that exchange was so simple but so loving??? Foaming at the mouth here. Especially after those crazy 30 years. So my question is, what are Ice and Mav’s kisses of choice? Forehead, cheek, regular ol’ lips, the world is their secretly sappy oyster.

I haven’t read that chapter of debriefing since fucking last October! Whoa! not sure how i feel about it .

regular ol’ on the lips :) it means something more than all the rest, it’s romantic in a way none of the others are (which is why it’s so dangerous)

okay yes re: ice being funny yes. wait wait wait let me find it in my doc hold on

here!

#Let this post make up for no wip Wednesday #augh ough #don’t like thinking about it #ice’s/val’s cancer is my ‘i don’t want to talk about it’ #PLEASE don’t talk to me about how ice Will probably die before mav i simply do not want to discuss it i simply won’t think about it just #like ugh don’t ugh ough it is so painful sometimes i just. Like. i fucking hate old people ngl like this is so awful #regarding this post specifically: #this is Christmas 2014 #i feel like: why Ice fell in love with maverick is pretty easy and obvious #why maverick fell in love with ice is pure selfishness #no one else ever gets to see the real ice #as my cyclone said about mav—‘You’re the only one of us who knows anything of him at all’ #and he feels lucky beyond belief for that but he is also not interested at all in sharing #pete maverick mitchell #tom iceman kazansky #top gun #icemav #asks #edts notes

[bonefall]

Voted for Bumble bc of course but also if you think Alex would not pspsps Bumble you are wrong. If they could communicate they would go to therapy together /s

If then could communicate they would go to therapy together

/GEN

Kyle/Green Lantern resurrects her but then he becomes convinced that she's not the same person she was before the incident, OR SOMETHING SOMETHING Black Lanterns aren't ACTUALLY bad they're just misunderstood Grim Reaper types, in either case Alex ends up breaking it off with Kyle because they've become very different people.

And then Bumble's there

And then they go to therapy or Alex adopts Bumble, and then uhhh Bumble's like one of the superpets. Like Krypto the Superdog. Free premise go forth and play with it if ur a DC fan

#bone babble #Again I don't actually know a lot about the DC universe besides what my friend tells me #But also from reading into the Black Lanterns having them be evil sound like a WHOLE wasted opportunity #Lanterns are supposed to be emotions yeah? so why the hell are we downplaying the emotion of GRIEF? #There's a whole lot you could do with that actually. Death doesn't deserve to just be a villain of the week #And hell. You could explore some WILD emotions here about Alex becoming so much more than Kyle's tragedy #Can I still mourn you when you aren't dead? #What does it mean for me that the worst thing that ever happened to me has become an opportunity for her? #And... does this make me selfish for not being happy for her? #For not trying to understand the person she has become? for only thinking of how this impacts myself #RE: THIS IS NOT A DIG AT DC FANS #BUT I want to share that like... a reason I've kinda had a hard time getting into comics is because like... really interesting premises-- #like that often get turned into Monster-of-the-Week struggles for the heroes to punch into submission #I've probably just seen really bad summaries or not found the editions that would appeal to me specifically #But it's kinda why the only DC hero I'm really interested in is Superman #Because a lot of his thing is that he's a good GUY #And that creates a lot of interesting moral questions #Like YES he's a good guy. YES he has no ulterior motive. But what if he DID?-- how can EVERYONE ELSE in the universe truly know that- #for sure? #And that's cool and I really like the snippets I've seen especially between him and batman #But anyway. so much fridging and misogyny in the world of comics has kinda turned me away from getting into it #because. VERY often. Misogyny can be... *tied* to a bit of a lack of imagination. Or empathy on behalf of a particular writer #RE: There is good stuff in DC PLEASE understand im not trying to be insulting

[bloomingsalma]

i think one of the most disappointing things is to see that your childhood friends have grown up to represent the kind of people you're disappointed in

#had a friendship break up w like one of my entire friend groups of six ppl? #found out that one of the girls in our friend group had sent screenshots of our private conversation about smth I was hurt over #to a gc with our other friends (but not me ofc) #and they all proceeded to talk shit about me :// I swear the way my stomach dropped when the friend I was having the convo w #sent me screenshots of what our mutual friends were saying about me #she knew how much it would hurt me but still did it just to prove a point (though I'm certain she misrepresented our conversation + my word #to them considering she blocked out what she had initially said to them lol) #my stomach hasn't dropped like that since high school #which is exactly where I thought we left this kind of deceitful behaviour. like how are you guys twenty one and still sending screenshots #and talking bad behind only one (1) friend's back when you know she can't defend herself in that space #I immediately texted our collective gc to explain a text she had sent but failed to give context for #then told them if I'm as selfish as they say I will leave this friend group. and then I left that gc #I also texted two friends who I knew were talking shit and I sent them the screenshots that first “friend” sent and pointed out how #she blocked out what she said so I'm suspicious that she skewed our conversation so they (the two other “friends”) should be wary #I told them I understood it was fair game to stoop. this low considering neither of them tried to reach out to me to hear my side #or defend me + my privacy #for context: the original argument was me voicing out that I was upset bc that first “friend” had invited and planned with with our friend #group an event that landed on my birthday without checking in with me if I was planning to spend time with them that day #and she kept defending herself and saying she didn't know I'd plan smth (probably bc my bday is two months away lmao) and she said #the event they'd be attending is just as important and necessary as being there for my birthday?? it's literally just a party her brother #(who none of us are close to lol) is DJing at. and I brought up how I'm their close friend (not her brother) and it's not fair to call #it equally necessary. but I suspect she skewed what I said greatly considering all of our friends started calling me selfish and unfair #but yeah v v crazy and hurtful and just astonishing #salmaspeaks

[meeeeeeese]

So I want to talk about the altar of Glaust, because it's incredibly important to the story and yet it almost never gets brought up.

What I think most people know about the altar is that its a forgotten artifact that was responsible for Glint, and by extension, Aurene being freed from the yoke of Kralkatorrik. While you can visit it in Arah, it kind of exits the story from there with no character ever thinking to use the sole artifact with the power to grant corrupted creatures free will again. However there's a few details that I think a lot of people miss that I find kind of interesting at least.

The first thing is that the altar itself is only a part of the process, it's just a component of a spell or ritual that does the actual work of cleansing the corruption.

Secondly, the spell needs to be performed at Arah. Though I don't know whether that's simply because the forgotten built the required altar there or because Arah is special somehow.

Personally, I think that there's something special about Arah that's required for the spells function beyond the mere presence of the altar. Zhaitan's presence indicates that it's almost definitely a ley-line nexus, and something about the land there was special enough to call the gods to tyria. So I think it'd make sense that they'd have to do it in Orr (which also suggests, given the forgotten attempted to purify Kralkatorrik, that ol'Kralky used to be active in Orr during the last dragonrise before flying up to the blood lands for his nap)

I think that would go some way as to explain why we're not using this incredible power, as the only way to do so is to venture through an unchained-infested city all the while lugging about whatever corrupted creature you want to cleanse.

And while I'm on the subject of why the altar isn't in the story more, there's also the fact that making corruption being curable more of a thing really changes the nature of dragon minions. Where before they're poor victims who can only be put down for everone's safety, the altar's presence makes them victims who, if you put in enough effort, you could save. Which would probably change the focus of the story quite dramatically as we have to weigh protecting still uncorrupted people against trying to save the corrupted from their fate.

(though imagine if we used purified branded to create living dragonsblood weapons, warriors uniquely suited to fighting branded who are immune to corruption because I don't think Kralkatorrik can brand them twice)

(as a sidenote, if you haven't done the forgotten path of the ruined city of arah you might not know that the altar is blimmin huge, check out the pic below with risen giants for scale)

Finally, just an interesting/annoying note is that we never got any explanation as to how the forgotten purification works, does it block the elder dragon from issuing commands to said minion? Does it work to nullify the dragonvoid lurking at the heart of the creatures magic? Replace the corrupted dragon magic with more benign ley energy? Who knows! Not us, and we likely never will now that we're moving away from the dragon storyline. And I promise I'm not salty about that.

So yeah, that's pretty much it, the altar's a pretty cool object and, for how little it comes up, a really important part of Aurene's ascension to non-mad elder dragon. Hopefully it'll one day get more attention, if only so we can have the commander go "Wait why haven't we been using this the entire time"

#gw2 #guild wars 2 #wew that was a long post #so in the dungeon we see an npc use the altar to purify a risen chicken #and I know my commander Rugan had some selfish part of him hope it wouldn't work #because the altar being functional meant that he might have been able to save Howl... #I'd probably just headcanon that no ones been able to purify more than a small creatures so far #even though that was never outright stated in game #moose lore posting

[sciderman]

I would say you’re more of a Mr peanut butter type yeah

doggy doggy what now?

#sci speaks #i love mr peanutbutter. #i think i love especially that eventually people stopped liking him. #cute quirky doggy winds up being a JERK actually just like the rest of us. #i love him and i love that. #really need to rewatch bojack actually because i don't remember it very well but god do i remember Loving it. #i think it's probably the best adult animated series i've ever seen. just. like. i don't know. it's the kind of writing that i really love. #where all the characters are bad actually. and you think they might be outwardly put together but they're not. #bojack is a GREAT SHOW. depressing but great. #i can't even like recommend it to anybody i'm like. yeah. it'll depress you. sorry. but that's why i like it. #i like those kind of ugly sincere emotions that make me feel less alone for being an asshole sometimes. #not in a “haha this character i like is an asshole so i can be an asshole too” kind of a way but in a . #i shouldn't despise myself because this is just part of what it is to be human i guess. you'll mess up and make selfish choices. #we all have that same software and i don't know. makes me feel less alone. i love to see that nobody else has it put together either. #it's not just me floating in the world with no direction. #it do be why i hate people who point at a character and say “BAD ROLEMODEL!! why aren't they PERFECT??” #get out shut up i hate you. #try living LIFE for five days maybe.

[craycraybluejay]

Honestly I think I do want to have kids someday. Definitely not bio kids but kids of my own all the same. Maybe just 1, maybe an entire 2.

I want to give the love and support that was not afforded to me. I want to watch them grow into amazing adults and know that I gave this child/these children the opportunity to live a good, fulfilled life. I want to instill in them my love of books; teach them important things like courage and bravery, kindness, respect, a sense of genuine wonder in a world so empty of it. I want to encourage their interests and pursuits and congratulate them when they work hard no matter the end result. I want to be the parent I never had, the best one possible.

I don't know where that fits into the rest of my life plan if it does at all. Idk. Sometimes when I experience something cool and whimsical I think; wouldn't it be awesome to share this with my own kid? A nice book or a pretty landscape or when I'm thinking about advocacy for good public schools. The thought creeps in, wouldn't it be amazing to keep even one person safe from the foster care system? Wouldn't it be lovely to have someone to nurture and support? Wouldn't it be awesome if because I was such a good parent my child lived a happy life where they felt free and safe to follow their dreams and be themselves and things?

#baby fever #or something like that #the mentally ill urge to save someone to make it better to not just break but eviscerate the cycle of violence #the masculine urge #to be a good dad the bestest dad to be selfless and protective and learn how to make room in life #meh ill worry about stuff like that when im no longer selfish and surviving and have the rest of my shit figured out #when i get old is probably the best time but is it cruel? #knowing you may have 10 20 30 years at most #idk #human lifespans are stupid as shit #youre born and youre not a person and then suddenly 16/18/etc. years later you are and u have all the responsinilities that come with it #and the weight of your whole life ahead of you #and if ur like me no one really taught you how to adult #and no matter how big your dreams you should supposedly figure out your life asap if you want kids #cuz no one wants a good parent to die when theyre young #but in the end grief is a natural byproduct of love #might delete later #getting all sentimental and shit

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

why is everything (showing other people respect. being patient and kind. not flying off the handle about stupid things. emotional regulation and self-control. et cetera.) so easy when I'm not around my parents and so so so so hard when I AM around them?

#this is a genuine question btw I need advice bc I'm STRUGGLING. idk why everything makes me frustrated and angry #when I'm around my parents and it's SO hard to be kind and respectful to them and my sister #but so easy literally everywhere else #I hate that I'm like this I wish I could genuinely be a nice person but apparently the person #I REALLY am is the horrible selfish lazy brat I am with my parents. #even though it feels 100% easier otherwise APPARENTLY the real me is the one I revert to at home #but being nice away from home comes so naturally?? so is THAT the real me??? idk what to do I'm so frustrated right now #Lu rambles #can my mutuals please weigh in bc I feel like a terrible horrible emotionally illiterate person rn #bc of a conversation in which I fought with my mom over the fact that I have a hard time respecting my middle school aged sister #bc I don't want her (bold. confident. sometimes a little bit of a brat as well bc humanity) thinking she can walk all over me #the way she acts always makes me feel like she thinks she's better than me but maybe it's just my mindset. bc I KNOW #that my middle schooler sister IS better than me in most ways and I HATE that. how can someone #so much younger than me be better than me at basically everything she sets her mind to? #and how can I ever have confidence in myself when I know that's the case??? it's so frustrating!! #ugghdnfnsngsmkgnskfnskd I need advice and prayers. and probably to go to bed early tonight.

[mckinlily]

One of my favorite tropes is characters who fully and completely believe they aren’t morally good. And yeah, maybe they’re rough around the edges and maybe definitely they aren’t “nice.”

But when you really dig into them, you find a moral code that’s been tried, hardened, and tested more than most people have ever had to face. You find out they’ve had to face and make decisions with no good answer and then somehow had to find a way to live with that. They’ve left conventions and social niceties far behind because they’ve encountered the situations where those just don’t work. They’ve faced the brutal, hard reality that you can’t save—you can’t even not hurt— everyone. They know sometimes the only person you can save is yourself. Sometimes you have to betray or hurt more than a few people to save yourself. They know Do no harm is an impossible lie. And yet under that forcing pressure, they have forged a moral core stripped of all bloat or arbitrary hangers on and tempered in brutal, honest assessment of reality.

And yet. Because they’ve seen the world for what it is rather than what is the sorry being sold. Because they don’t buy into the hypocrisy of “innocent” and “unblemished” and “pure.” Because they don’t look like what society says good should look like, because they don’t think like society says good should think, because they have faced impossible situations and made decisions instead of looking away and pretending that was not also a choice—

Because they are human and imperfect and feel the pain “good” is not supposed to know—

They assume they must be not be good. No matter how hard they try, how brave they are, how much empathy they extent or how many sacrifices they make to help others. They assume they must always be fundamentally Bad.

Because Good people don’t see the complexities, don’t struggle with the complexities and failures, like they do.

Right?

I love when those characters are the kindest (not nice but kind), strongest, most truly brave characters in their setting. Who can reach others who are also imperfect and struggling and broken and beaten down in a way those who are that golden, innocent “good” never could.

I love when good is not being above, separate, untouched by ramble masses and evil. But instead are right in the thick of it, scarred and broken just as much as anyone else, but made the decision to try. Even if they do not believe they are good—or ever can be. Even if they think their efforts are too small. Even if their attempts are small.

And I always hope for those characters to eventually find enough healing to see how strong and good they are.

But in the mean time, I love them for hard they try, even while believing there’s something wrong with them, forever staining their soul.

(As if there isn’t something wrong with all of us. As if the definition a good person is not innocence from bad actions but the choice to do better. As if that single choices doesn’t take more bravery than the most fearless warrior.)

#just random thoughts #if you’ve been here long you probably know who at least one of these characters is about #another is my favorite oc who I will actually write…someday #oh whoops my religious trauma is showing #would you believe I thought boundaries made me a selfish and morally bad person until I was 25? #ANYWAY #yes this is at least 50% about Takashi Shirogane

[white-weasel]

If John was alive when Brit and Mallick won their game, they would have become apprentices together. Send post

#they were genuinely the perfect candidates to become apprentices I think #they believe that their game helped them atone for what they did and also taught them about how selfish they were + how to move forward #with the right words and pitch from John they’re joining up together and becoming basically an apprentice duo always working together #(probably not an original thought but also…… how would I know I’m new here lmao) #brit stevenson #mallick scott #pintshipping #saw v #saw series #sawposting #saw franchise #white weasel talks

[clits-and-clips]

Since writing the affirmations and starting manifestation again, I've actually been in a much better headspace. It's crazy how things align, and you end up where you need to be, especially through pain

#txt #have been reading the affirmations every day twice a day sometimes #doing my intentions and manifesting what i wsnt #which is mainly independence #also a good relationship with my ex from here #mainly stuff for me tho #and the full moon on Wednesday which is in scorpio which is his sun sign #will be a big release and maybe i can let go a bit or a lot lol #i need to move on and focus on myself and what i want in life and doing it all on my own #with support obviously but ive never been fully independent and im so ready for the blessings and the open doors #i dont know if ill truly ever be over him but i have to try for my own sanity at this point #i dont want to manifest anything selfish like him coming back to me because it probably wont happen anyway lmao #i hope i dont sound crazy lmao but coming back into my spiritual journey is definitely what i need #connecting with myself and my purpose feels like the only thing i can do rn #have a driving lesson tomorrow but in all honesty i could just go do the test and pass cause ive been driving forever and im good at it #just need to practice certain things but im nearly there! so close i can feel it and see it #anyway i hope i can keep this energy up and continue to head in a positive direction because it feels really good #if i need to cry about him and the loss then i will but im not going to dwell on it too much #i just need to take it as a lesson and let it go :) #cause at the end of the day i really did lead myself here whether it was his choice to end it or not #blah

[sysig]

Very cool and not at all uncomfortable vent sesh (Patreon)

#Doodles #Wander Over Yonder #Emperor Awesome #Commander Peepers #Some friendly Eyesome :D #This is all Awesome's fault lol I thought about him being dramatic and lying on the ground and venting to Peepers and it became an Idea #Awesome stop being fun to draw challenge - at least it's not as hard a challenge as Peepers stop being being fun to draw lol #A lot of his poses were really fun for this as well :D Although I didn't mean to put Awesome behind him initially lol #They're probably at Awesome's actually - Peepers brought something to work on the workaholic needs his enrichment lol #I just can't imagine Awesome being comfortable on the Skullship let alone Peeps' quarters lol ''Damn bitch you live like this?'' #Like he can talk ♪ But at least he knows what he likes! #Peepers gets all the vent sessions haha - at least Awesome would probably return the favour! Gossip ♫ It's still probably mismatched #Both for Awesome's selfishness and Peepers' discomfort with relying on others and being kinda repressed #If Awesome pushed him the right way he'd probably spill a lot though hehe #But anyway this is about Awesome! I think actually becoming friends with Peepers after he told him off would recontextualize some things :) #Still some hard feelings but not enough to reignite the fight over haha #And actually letting Peeps in and his words sink into his bones - and as he says watching Peepers work so hard but still just be a minion #What does this say about me??? thinks the self-obsessed shark man lol #Meanwhile Peepers was just expecting a self-centered rant but he actually got caught in the crossfire enough to be complimented hehe #At least Someone around he recognizes how hard he works! #''Alright fine you've got my attention keep puffing my ego'' lol #His little quirked ''brow'' hehe <3

[jacky-rubou]

"Selfishly hoarding your college money, cause you only care about yourself!"

that's... that's not how grants work, Stan... Ford's not being selfish for not giving the money to you, he's actually being a responsible grant recipient and not using the money to commit actual fraud by using it for anything other than research purposes. He has to justify his expenses to the college he earned it from and if he's caught wiring grant money to you via unreported/unjustified expenses, he'd get the grant revoked and probably go to jail. And, depending on circumstances, it might even get you in even more trouble than you already were for accepting it. Is that really what you want? Honestly wouldn't even be surprised if his grant had already been revoked at this point.

#gravity falls #ford pines #stanford pines #stan pines #stanley pines #maybe he's selfish for other things but... #hoarding college money isn't it chief #yes i know stan probably wasn't aware of how they work #but the fact he immediately jumped to him being selfish over it is what gets me