#i just have a lot to say about max jagerman

[holyjagerman]

oh! are you kidding?

No No No this is like

THE

nicest thing

anyone’s EVER done for me

: - )

LIKE THE UH WHEN THE

WHEN THE

GHOST!!

came out and my heart was like

doh doh doh doh doh doh

ohh,,

AND THE SKELE’ON

that was REALLY special

#max jagerman #my beloved #i just have a lot to say about max jagerman #npmd #nerdy prudes must die #starkid

[nobodysdaydreams]

More Hatchetverse Theory: The Reasons Why Hatchetfield Hates Clivesdale (It's Worse Than You Think).

Well my Hatchetverse theories have been taking off so I'm just gonna keep the good times rolling (the hashtag is "#hatchetverse theory"). Read below for an unhinged rant.

So there have already been a fair amount of theories about Clivesdale and why the residents of Hatchetfield hate it so much. I'll start by reviewing one of the most popular theories: that Clivesdale and Hatchetfield mirror the black and white, and that Clivesdale is associated with the "white" while Hatchetfield is associated with the "black".

The evidence is pretty compelling:

Clivesdale is the "sister city" of Hatchetfield. Webby is the sister of the LIB

The townspeople hate Clivesdale with a violent passion, and people have already pointed out that this mirrors Wiggly's hatred of Webby. Meanwhile, the people of Clivesdale don't seem to hate Hatchetfield. They raise the bridge in TGWDLM out of concern, but they don't seem to aggressively dislike Hatchetfield and mourn them when they are gone. This again seems to mimic that attitude Webby and her brothers have with each other.

The names of Clivesdale and Hatchetfield have similar meanings. "Clive" means to "Split or to chop" and "Dale" means "Valley". Hatchets are used to chop things. The towns are literally "split apart". I talk about the names of some of the town's other landmarks here.

The fight between the Clivesdale and Hatchetfield High football teams is emphasized a lot, to the point where the news covers it more than the murders of the teens in NPMD, and warns that a "losing streaks coming", but says that hopefully they can "get them next year". This could signify how the war between the black and white seems to occur in several realities.

Clivesdale and Hatchetfield have other similarities too, like how the Hatchetfield Honey Festival (a cover for an evil cult sacrifice, according to Nightmare Time) parallels the Clivesdale Cherry Festival (which no one is interested in, according to a newspaper prop from the musicals, but that's the Hatchetfield news, so it might be biased reporting).

But even if we assume this theory is true, I don't think the LIB would make the residents hate the town merely because they hate their sister and her town. This is because there are two other potentially terrifying reasons why the LIB would want the citizens of Hatchetfield to hate Clivesdale.

The first, which I haven't seen anyone talk about yet, is that Hatchetfield is an island. To leave it, citizens either need to leave by plane, boat, or bridge. And where does the only bridge off the island lead? Clivesdale. The LIB make the residents hate Clivesdale so that they won't leave Hatchetfield because it likely means they'd have to go through Clivesdale, which many residents say they'd rather die than do. One piece of evidence that supports this theory is the way the LIB try to entice the residents of Hatchetfield to stay in "Drowsytown":

There are many times when the LIB refer to the Black or being under their control as being in "Drowsytown" (and I can make a whole other post about the LIB and sleep/nightmares and Drowsytown symbolism another time). But, this is significant, because when citizens "wake up" from the LIB's control, their followers and the LIB themselves specifically ask them to stay "Down in Drowsytown" (also possibly a metaphor for "Hatchetfield's Downtown", they do sound similar). In Nightmare Time, the sniggles also sing about how they can't leave Drowsytown.

The other reason the LIB want the citizens of Hatchetfield to hate Clivesdale so much is a bit darker, and stems from a combination of Clivesdale being the only way off the island and the deep seated hatred the people of Hatchetfield have for Clivesdale, particularly in NPMD.

I have a separate post on this, but Max Jagerman hates Clivesdale so much that when he dies, he declares that he's going to destroy the whole town Clivesdale, and in "Go Go Nighthawks!", the students declare that they are going to "kill Clivesdale". At first this seems like the usual Clivesdale hate, but then one might consider the facts that Clivesdale is one of Hatchetfield's only links to the outside world, and the LIB seem to have a vested interest in conquering said world.

Thus, when the citizens of Hatchetfield say they hate Clivesdale and are going to destroy everyone there, they are not just referring to the citizens of Clivesdale, or the White/Webby of the "Black and White", but the mainland, the rest of the world, and everyone in it.

Think about it. If the LIB convinced the citizens of Hatchetfield that joining them or doing what they wanted would destroy Clivesdale, most of them would join them in their world domination quest with no questions asked. The LIB also sing in NMPD "why help you with the Jagerman when we could help the world?" which when combined with Max's earlier threat about destroying all of Clivesdale, and the fact the LIB make sure they still have control of Grace at the end of NPMD, seems pretty concerning, because it appears to imply that the LIB would only help the kids with Max if they had the guarantee that they'd still have a way to conquer the world, but again, this is just a theory.

Then there are two other relatively unexplored aspects of the dynamic between Clivesdale and Hatchetfield that we just don't have very much detail on, but I'll share what I got.

The first is the names of their mascots: The Nighthawks and The Chemists (I already made a post about the Sycamore High Timber Wolves).

The "Nighthawks" seems pretty self explanatory, it fits with the whole "Nightmare Time" "Eternal Night" "Black" "Drowsytown" theme quite nicely. Also in NPMD, when singing about Max, the students sing "like a nighthawk he preys" and the nighthawks are called predators.

The "Clivesdale Chemists" is more obviously an odd mascot, but harder to figure out since we don't have much lore on Clivesdale. "Chemists" could mean "Alchemists" could mean "Witches", but it's still unclear what the significance could be there or what the history is between Hatchetfield and Clivesdale and how it mimics the history between Webby and Wiggly. (The Witch in the Web song and Wiggly's repeated statements about hating Webby and wanting "wrath"/"revenge" are the only clues we have on that for now. Also the Cross and Holloway rivalry).

The second is the existence of the Nantucket Bridge.

It provides compelling evidence for the first part of my theory about the LIB using the Clivesdale hate to keep everyone in Hatchetfield/Drowsytown/the Black. If the people of Hatchetfield hate Clivesdale, they won't use the bridge.

I googled the word "Nantucket" and found a few meanings: "island", "far off land" and "sandy, sterile soil tempting no one". Make of that what you will.

It is confirmed in TGWDLM that Clivesdale controls the Nantucket Bridge (or at least half of it), because they raise it when Hatchetfield becomes infected with Pokey's apocalypse. Interestingly, this is the only time they seem to do so and they do so in response to what seems like just reports of a meteor crash into a theater and the occurrence of random flash mobs (not the scariest sounding thing that's ever happened in Hatchetfield so idk).

"Bridge" could also be referring to a gateway to the Black and White from earth, or bridge between the Black and White in general. Keeping along with the word theme, the body of water under the bridge is called the "Nantucket Channel", and the use of the words "Channel" and "Black and White" could refer to television, but that association is a bit more out there than the other ones, which have more evidence.

There are a lot more spin-off rants I could do with this, but I'll leave it here for a while. I hope you enjoy Starkid fandom!

#hatchetverse theory #hatchetverse #hatchetfield #starkid productions #starkid #star kid #npmd #nightmare time #nighthawks #Clivesdale #Clivesdale chemists #the guy who didn't like musicals #tgwdlm #nerdy prudes must die #nerdy prudes spoilers #max jagerman #drowsytown

[rentumblsstuff]

Back to the NPMD x Monster High AU, a couple more things:

I would like to rescind my Werecat Brenda in favor of Nighthawk Harpy Brenda. Yes, I know I made Kyle a werewolf to parallel Brenda being a werecat but I also have a better offer for Kyle too: Yeti, which is why he still holds a grudge against Max for wrecking his dad’s ski-doo.

I have so many thoughts on Vampire Grace. She was born a normie and is a recently turned vampire (maybe even a vampire hunter that failed on an outing and was turned by her prey). She’s having trouble coping with her religion now that she’s a monster and constantly wears turtlenecks like the one she wears in Perky’s Buds to cover up her bite marks. She tried still wearing her cross necklace as a show of rejecting this new form, trying to embrace the pain of having the cross so close because she thought that loving Jesus even when she’s a form of half-demon would make herself better than other Christians, but it hurt way too badly for her to handle so now she just says she wears it underneath her sweater. Jason was born a vampire and wants to help her through her dysphoria but Grace won’t accept anyone treating her like she’s a vampire (even though she is). She does like the part about eating flesh and drinking blood- it’s what Jesus says to do with himself, so in a way, she’s making everyone she eats a little more Christ-like. That’s her thought process, at least. She also still pretends to be human around her parents and normie best friend Gabe. Gabe may or may not know that she’s a vampire though and wants to seduce her so she can turn him too.

In High School is Killing Me, the lyric is now changed to “Fuck you, biteology.”

Max’s Jekyll form is human (Max), but his Hyde form looks like his ghost (The Jagerman).

Stachie is soooo canon because Richie loves swimming but as a werecat Stacy refuses to get in the water and they feel like their romance is especially forbidden because of it. If Richie didn’t love the water so much, he’d wish he was a werecat too because he also wants to be a pretty little kitty meow meow

Ethan, Lex, and Hannah also went there obviously and Ethan was a ghost á la Jonny Spirit and Lex and Hannah are both spider people. You know tf why lol

Ruth is a lot like Frankie Stein in that she flirts with a lot of people but they Do. Not. Flirt. Back. Rather than solid stripes, her sweater looks more like lightning bolts and the mushroom design is a little creepier than just an Amanita.

A lot of the smoke club are also nighthawk harpies (because they like eating the weed) (including Deb) and so a lot of people assume Brenda is also in the smoke club. She isn’t. Monster high typical speciesism mixed with Hatchetfield High typical bullying regardless of social hierarchy.

The Woodwards are flytraps and that’s why Alice doesn’t smoke- plants don’t do that to other plants. This is often a point of contention between Deb and Alice even though they try to pretend it isn’t an issue

Steph’s secretly embarrassed about her decay so she always makes sure her wraps are FRESH, but the rest of her outfit is always her jagged hand-cut crop tops and ripped jeans. Her decay spread to her scalp and forehead and everyone knows better than to say something about the wraps on her forehead or how she always wears a beanie but Pete accidentally tells her he thinks it makes her look even cooler. Swooning ensues because nobody dares address her flaws, much less say she’s cooler for having them.

Steph secretly wishes Pete had a corporeal form because her love language is physical touch and she’s sad she’ll never be able to hold him. (Kind of like how Cleo is sad she’ll never get to look Deuce in the eyes).

Sophia/Spitfire as a background character fire elemental is a MUST.

The janitor is a crazy man who lives in the catacombs under the school and is possessed by what the student body can only assume is a goat demon and Peter Geist feels weirdly like he knows him.

Rosary as Claire Rosary as Claire Rosary as Claire-

Pete has also died recently as one of The Jagerman’s attacks when he was out of control, and he’s new to the school along with Grace. He’s stuck in this dorky outfit he wore so he wouldn’t get bullied and can never change clothes, but at least he’s impossible to punch unless if another spirit tried to attack him. As opposed to Grace in life, he was very interested in the supernatural (one of his special interests) so he knows quite a bit about monster types but is always hungry to learn more about the new world he found himself un-living in

#hatchetfield #hatchetverse #starkid #npmd #NPMD monster high AU #stephanie lauter #peter spankoffski #brenda npmd #kyle clauger #grace chasity #stacy npmd #ruth fleming #max jagerman #vampire Grace Chastity my beloved #my one and only #Lautski #stachie #richie lipschitz #homeless man Starkid #homeless Ted #tnoy karaxis

[indigos-shits-and-giggles]

GUYS I THINK I JUST FIGURED SOMETHING OUT ABOUT MAX JAGERMAN AND I NEED TO SHARE IT WITH SOMEONE

So, you know Jeff's Hatchetfield citizen?

Yeah, that guy. That guy that may or may not also be Greg (or Jreg depending on who you may ask) from that bit of Show Stoppin number. For the sake of this argument, we're going to run with the idea that he's the same person as Greg/Jreg because they look exactly the same.

So, what do we know about Greg? Well, not a whole lot really. EXCEPT that he and Hidgens (along with the other Working Boys) met on the football field. So, naturally we can assume that Greg is a football player.

Note that J on his jacket. The one that made a lot of people jokingly assume that his name is, in fact, Jreg. Who's last name also happens to start with the letter J? Why, Max Jagerman of course!

Now, this alone might seem like kind of a stretch, however there is more.

Before Will Branner was announced to play Max, a lot of people, including me, figured that Jeff Blim would be the one to play Max. It just seemed like the character he'd play, considering Jeff has also played characters like Aladdin and Sam Sweetly. Furthermore, Will and Jeff do look somewhat similar, especially when you take into account the hair and the eyes.

Now, remember when I mentioned that Greg most likely was a football player? Well, would it really be a stretch to say, for example, that he may have raised a kid to love football just as much as he did? Maybe said kid happens to be Max Jägerman, star football player at the same high school his dad used to go too.

I do know that this probably isn't intentional, however something about it just makes sense in my head.

At least to me, Greg is Max Jägerman's dad. And I won't stop believing it until canon directly states otherwise

#but seriously Jeff Blim should totally play one of max's relatives #they just #yeah #max jagerman #max jägerman #the guy who didn't like musicals #TGWDLM #nerdy prudes must die #npmd #npmd spoilers #hatchetfield #hatchetfield universe #team starkid #starkid #he's a literal monster

[peterfankoffski]

I REMEMBER SEEING ART WITH THIS A FEW MONTHS BACK BUT I WANT TO EXPLAIN (still crediting @wetcatschwartzy for the idea/inspiration though. also hi i'm aware we've never spoken sorry for tagging you in my unhinged fic idea post) BUT ANYWAY uhhhhhh. 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee. But make it the main cast of NPMD. An au that appeals to ???? people ?? it definitely appeals to me

And now the cast I'd so and my justifications, idc

Steph Lauter as Olive Ostrovsky

Thought process: We know Olive's dad works a lot, is emotionally distant, and Olive implies that he can be downright cold or abusive during the I Love You song, which lines up pretty well with Steph and Solomon's relationship. Olive's mom ran off, and we never get any mention of Steph's (picture Steph being introduced by the hosts mentioning her mom won Honey Queen or something). Both know their strengths and weaknesses but have serious self-doubts about their own intelligence (Steph being convinced she's dumber than she realizes, Olive never answering until she whispers the word to herself). Also I thought about Mariah singing TILY Song and sobbed.

Pete Spankoffski as William Morris Barfée

Starting off strong, they both have very stupid names that they KNOW are stupid and try to defend the moment they can ("It's Polish" / "There's an accent aigu"). Both of them have grumpy/cold exteriors, but when you get down to it, they're both just socially awkward and autistic coded but very intelligent kids that are really just at the Bee to try to make something of themselves (Barfée dropping out because of an allergic reaction at the previous Bee could totally translate to Pete having a diabetic emergency). Both develop crushes on Steph/Olive by the end of act 1 of their respective shows too, so. There's that I guess.

Grace Chasity as Logainne Schartzandgrubinierre

"But Ember, wouldn't she match better with the Catholic--" GRACE DOES NOT LIKE CATHOLICS. Also I have thought this through. Logainne is politically aware, cutthroat, and automatically assumes herself to be the most important person in the room. She takes up every project and social issue that she can to appease her dads, determined to be as perfect as they want her to be. She loses the Bee because she gets overconfident, taking a serious blow because of her pride. Grace takes up every project and social issue that she can (anti-hocoming posters and the prank on Max for example), can be cutthroat (canonically has murdered at least two men), and thanks to her holier-than-thou nature, assumes herself the most important person in the room. She takes up cancelling HOCO and is always early for school and is extremely devout because that's the perfect little girl her parents expect from her. And she'd probably get so into it she'd fall from pride, too.

Max Jagerman as Marcy Park

HEAR ME OUT! Marcy has been the top of her class all her life, to the point she was moved one grade ahead. She's popular, she's intelligent, she's multitalented, and she's peaking at age 12 and aware of it. "I Speak Six Languages" is literally her having a breakdown realizing she's been the "best" for too long and it's stressing her out. Max, meanwhile, says he knows he's peaked in high school, and therefore is making the most out of his popularity and status while he can. Like, I can picture him mentioning he's done every sport available to him and being the best athlete is only going to do so much for him in his life in a "I'm so sick and tired / of always being the best and brightest" type monologue. So when he drops out on purpose, who would he daydream about instead of Jesus? Maybe some NFL star idk. Everything I know about football is about the Chiefs (Missouri represent) and also learned against my will.

Ruth Fleming as Chip Tolentino

They're both horny, both proud of their own nerdiness, and would both ABSOLUTELY catch feelings for a competitor's sibling and immediately forget what word they had to spell. And would both make jokes about the especially dirty sounding words (to be fair all his words are kinda funny. And I DID learn the word "tittup" from this show) (look it up I dare y'all). Ruth singing Chip's Lament? Funny to me.

Richie Lipschitz as Leaf Coneybear

AuDHD coded, tendency to have the wrong takeaways, generally socially awkward even among the other nerds. Tbh that's all I got, they're matched up because they're the last ones. Still kinda fits though.

And I have less justification for the adults but here's my takes anyway

Miss Mulberry as Rona - sweet but stern ladies who've been taking care of after school functions for years

Tom Houston as Douglas Panch - he doesn't want to be there, he's as confused as everyone else (but without the hitting on Mulberry stuff he's never do Becky wrong like that <3)

Dan Reynolds as Mitch Mahoney - he's a volunteer counselor!

#wow that was long #i love spelling bee sm oml <33 #team starkid #starkid #hatchetfield #hatchetverse #npmd #nerdy prudes must die #peter spankoffski #pete spankoffski #steph lauter #stephanie lauter #grace chasity #max jagerman #ruth fleming #richie lipschitz #miss mulberry #tom houston #dan reynolds #25th annual putnam county spelling bee #25apcsp #the 25th annual putnam county spelling bee #lautski #<- i guess #i'm so tempted to write this i'm not even joking #i spent 30 minutes typing this

[all-for-geek]

The Story Max Jagerman Never Got to Tell (Silly Goofy things I think about if Max didn't die and had gotten a redemption arc)

So I like to think that he is very slow going at the whole being nice to people thing. Like outside of the main 5 he is still very much the Literal Monster, and even within the main friend group still verbally bullies them he just isn't physically hurting them anymore. As he learns and grows with them, he gets better. First learning to treat his friends on the football team better, and eventually tolerating the other nerds. He still slips up occasionally and says things in the moment that he regrets later, but he's learning to apologize when that happens.

I think once he finds out that the prank was Grace's idea, he is convinced that it was Grace secretly letting him know that she liked him back. He proceeds to start full on courting her: he walks to all her classes, he buys her flowers on special occasions, she even has special privileges to go to the football games (still early on in character development). One day when she goes, he introduces himself to her parents, and the Chastitys make it clear that no one outside of the church can date their daughter. So Max converts. Or at least tries to. He can never grasp his head around all the rules, and by the end of the week, he has decided that it's better if he and Grace are just friends.

At first, he mostly uses Pete as a free tutoring service. He's upset that Pete won't just let him cheat off of him like he did with Steph, but it doesn't even take Max that long to figure out why Steph is different. He makes Pete a deal that he will let him date Steph if Pete cheats for him. Pete talks him down to tutoring with the promise that if it doesn't work, then he will help Max cheat. It turns out that Pete is actually a really good teacher. Max also has certain learning disabilities (I'm gonna go with dyscalculia since we know he's in remedial algebra) that never went addressed since his dad refused to get him tested. Pete is able to show Max techniques that help, and once Max's head no longer hurts from looking at numbers too long, he begrudgingly admits that it's not so bad. Pete also notices that the halls are little quieter before and after Max's math class now.

He never really hung out with Steph that much before. They knew each other and flew in the same circles, but they never really talked before. Max definitely learns how not-okay his dad is by seeing how Steph's dad treats her. As they get closer, he starts getting madder and madder about how the Mayor talks about her. It takes a long time for him to reflect on what he's saying and realizes that his advice works on him too. Him and Steph start bonding over their horrible dads and help each other out when home gets to be a lot.

Ruth is the one that it is the hardest for him to vibe with. While the others he either finds something kinda cool about or can use, Ruth is...Ruth. He doesn't actively bully her anymore, but he doesn't go out of his way to be around her either. He does inadvertently teach her how to be cool though. It's not intentional, but he is less willing to put up with Ruth's whining about how unlovable she is than the others. One day, he starts yelling back to her that maybe if she wasn't constantly complaining about never having anyone around her, then maybe more people would want to be around her. The others call him out for being out of line, but it starts a path for Ruth about learning to be more confident in herself.

I think Richie is the first one to be onboard with the whole 'Max is suddenly chill with us' thing. He's seen enough anime to know a redemption arc when he sees one. He also has a more intense look on Max's growth being around him so much as the mascot. He's the first one to reach out to Max about coming over and watching some anime with him. Max is unsure at first, but Richie convinces him that Attack on Titan actual is really cool and has a lot of blood and guts and fighting in it, so Max agrees as long as Richie doesn't tell anyone what they're doing. Max actually does get really into it, but Richie notices that he seems pay more attention to the "found family" aspects and the character interactions than the fight scenes. He gives Max DVDs that he can watch on his own if he wants: a combination of shows and movies about sports, fighting, and some introspective character pieces as well.

Max also spends the most time at Richie's house than the others. Not necessarily because he prefers Richie, but because Richie has the most chill homelife (the Chastity's still bug him about coming back to church, Steph's dad reminds him to much of home, and Ruth's parents are convinced that he and Ruth are dating. Pete is a close second, but his weird older brother is over a lot, and Max just gets a bad vibe from him). He will just casually pop into Richie's window some nights and say that they are going to watch anime. Richie agrees obviously, but he also wonders what else is going on. It's only after a really personal episode of My Hero Academia that Max lets slip about his dad.

In short, Max Jagerman has so much potential, and it is a shame that he has been doomed by the narrative to never show it.

#might write this out as a full fic later #but i'm already working on like 3 so #nerdy prudes must die #npmd #max jagerman #grace chasity #stephanie lauter #ruth fleming #richie lipschitz

[1lovesickfangirl1]

obligatory nerdy prudes must die tier list! (explaining under the cut)

Bully The Bully- OKAY THIS IS MY FAV SONG AT THE MOMENT IT'S SO FUN!! Just some kids planning to prank the bully and no one dies :D! I will now list some of my favorite parts because I love it so much

° the entire cool beans section (i used to say cool beans so much a few years ago)

° the jAgermAn??

° "Petey gonna jump on out *he jumps* "JAGER GONNA JAGER OUUUT" (been repeating this part a lot)

° "We're gonna make a dirty movie where the losers win, and the joke is on him!" (AAAAGH I LOVE HARMONIES)

Nerdy Prudes Must Die- Will and Jon in this song?? IM EATING THIS SHIT UP!!! Jon sounds so good omg. Max's ghost form is sick as hell.

High School Is Killing Me- the opening song is a bop. THE HARMONIESSS!!

Cool As I Think I Am Reprise- AAH THIS SONG DESTROYED ME. HOW DARE THEY BE IN LOVE WITH EACH OTHER

Literal Monster Reprise- DUDE I LOVE WILL'S PERFORMANCE!! really hoping to see him in more Starkid stuff. performing this song looks so fun. Max is an asshole, but so goofy.

Lords In Black- idk why The Summoning and Lords In Black are separate things, thought The Summoning was the intro to the song but whatevs. love the designs of the lords in black. such a fun song, really should listen to it more.

If I Loved You- H A R M O N I E S!!! love when Pete was talking about the football team he swung his arms like a bat.

Bury The Body- love Grace being unhinged good for her. the panic is so good in this scene. again, HARMONIESS!! and hooray for cutting off nips.

Hatchet Town- EVERYONE SOUNDS SO GOOD. all the references were fun! it's giving McCarthyism

Cool As I Think As I Am- love Pete and love this song, but there are songs that i love WAY more. this song is iconic tho, it's got the line that comes back across the musical!! build that confidence king!

Dirty Girl- a Definite Bop. and Will is RIPPED GODDAMN. but maybe just a liiiittle too long. and when she was repeating im a good girl I was kinda uncomfy lmao.

Just For Once- playing a character that's playing a character sounds difficult so props to Lauren. liked seeing more of Ruth's character in this song. feeling like her life is over even tho she's still young (oh no it's relatable)

Best Of You- THEY WENT THROUGH HELL THEY DESERVE A CHEESY ENDING SONG!!

Dirty Dudes Must Die- WOO GRACE GET THOSE DIRTY DUDES

Literal Monster- it's alright, don't have any strong feelings about it. Kim SLAYED her part tho!

The Summoning- just an intro, points for spooky vibes

Go Go Nighthawks- very unfortunate that this goes at the bottom of the list. love the football guys <3 FUCK YOU CLIVESDALE!!! it's good but just really repetitive :/

#nerdy prudes must die #npmd #starkid #love all the songs #ive been putting this off because it's so hard to choose #max jagerman #grace chasity #pete spankoffski #richie lipschitz #ruth fleming #stephanie lauter

[slashingdisneypasta]

Hatchetfield anon here, and good to know it's fine to gush about them. (Had to Switch off from anonymous to send images :p)

The first one (and possibly less spoiler heavy) would probably be the diva, the queen bee-atch herself: Linda Monroe.

She's from Black Friday and she just scratches that part of my brain that's attracted to dommy rich ladies. She's important, her children are better than everyone else's, and though she thinks her husband is a sniveling fool, she appreciates his loyalty at least. She has a whole song about how she'll make everyone love her ("Adore Me". Quote: "You'll kneel before me, Kiss my toe"), and honestly? She's not wrong. Lot of people fell for the cult "exciting new little religion" that she started (me included. Lauren Lopez just eats her roles right the fuck up).

Then, of course, you have the cooky, reclusive, biology professor: Professor Hidgens.

Mad scientist mixed with theater kid vibes. Literally. He's as extra as you can imagine. And what I like best about him is that he's a "greater good" kind of villain. As soon as he realizes the alien hive mind that's turning the whole town into a musical (not the craziest part of this entire series, by far) could be humanity's last shot at world peace, he's all, "Okay. Yeah. Let's join the hive!", knocking out his allies, opening up the doors of his doomsday bunker, and attracting the hive zombies with his own, recently composed song, "Show Stopping Number" (quote: "it'll unify humanity, in a THUNDERING CHORUS! No exists from this Broadway venue~!"), which mixes in a except from the musical he wrote and was trying to get funding for called "Working Boys".

And finally, we have the most recent ones: Max Jagerman, and Grace Chastity.

Where do I start with Grace... She's a repressed Christian girl who thinks having no sexual thoughts until marriage is supposed to be the norm. Then she starts getting dirty thoughts, kills a man, gets her hands on a book full of rituals powered by eldritch beings and decides, "yeah. This is what I want to do with my life. Seducing pervy dudes and then, if they don't pass the vibe check, consume their soul in order to make me stronger..." One good day away from murder, really, as evidenced by her leading the songs "Bury the Bully" and "Dirty Dudes Must Die". Never really expected a character who has the canonical line "[after character A asks why character B would be in hell] -She's bisexual and dead, where else would she be?" to grow on me so strongly, and yet-

And finally we get to Max Jagerman. The unapologetically bastard of a jock with a God complex ("Don't need no one to tell me / High school will be my peak / So I'm willing to take advantage"). The way everyone paints him as this horrible monster in, well, "Literal Monster", and he doubles down on that when it becomes his turn to sing instead of the expected "I'm not *that* much of a monster, here's my redeeming qualities"... Even when his ghost is being sent to the shadow realm he reacts to it by literally saying "WORTH IT!". He's just hits all the right notes for me. The entirety of "Dirty Girl" was sung directly into my soul.

And i think that's about it for my rambling. Now I leave you with the knowledge that Grace and Max's most popular ship name (that I've seen) is "Holy Ghost/Spirit". Sorry for rambling and have a nice day!

THESE ALL SOUND SO GOOD! I definitely wanna watch these now, or at least just listen to the songs 😅😅😅

I don't even know where to start here! I cant even choose a favourite out of your descriptions!! Thank you so much!! Linda sounds completely like my type XD Oh- I have that same brain-part that makes you crave dommy rich ladies XD Especially if they're mean 😅 I'm happy to be a loyal spineless husband for a pretty woman with a sharp tongue XD Happy.

And Professor Hidgens looks promising too XD If you've been following my Callaghan meltdown you know I have a... Thing... for teachers ☠ And OH, just the way you've described him. 'knocking out his allies, opening up the doors of his doomsday bunker, and attracting the hive zombies with his own, recently composed song, "Show Stopping Number"'- Y E S. I'm all for this.

And- just- Grace and Max sound absolutely perfect XD She seems so gross and awful which I l o v e (When female villains get to be truly despicable and broken??? 👌👌👌), and him?? A villain being exactly (if not worse then) what everyone says??? Absolutely obsess-worthy.

#i n e e d them actually. #thank you soooo much for this!! i'm so into them now!! need to listen to the songs at l e a s t. #i hope you have a wonderful day too ^^ 💛

[shaniacsboogara]

boog what is your fav sk show

I may have taken forever to answer this, but that's because I've been THINKING ABOUT IT CONSTANTLY!!!

In all honesty, I can't pick ONE favourite, but I'll give you a little list (in no particular order mind you)

The first sk musical I ever watched was The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals (probably a few months after it originally came out???) and it will ALWAYS be one of my favourite musicals of all time. It's funny, the premise is unique and inventive, the score is PHENOMENAL, and THE PERFORMANCES??? Corey as Bill made me SOB (and still does if I think about him and Alice's story too hard). Now that the productions rights are out and I'm headed to uni and they have a theatre club there... 👀 (It probably won't happen but a Boog can dream)

I also LOVE LOVE LOVE Twisted. Yeah it's silly, but also absolutely devastating. It would be an understatement to say I'm obsessed with Dylan Saunders' performance as Jafar. Twisted is my Roman Empire. I think about No One Remembers Achmed at least five times a day. AND JEFF BLIM AS FREAKY ALADDIN??? HIS JEKYLL AND HYDE MOMENT??? IS FOREVER ENGRAINED IN MY PSYCHE. And also just the Disney villains montage type thing they do is iconic and wonderful and 'If I Believed' is the only song ever actually.

I also just love The Hatchetverse as a whole. Black Friday was a real treat and I absolutely freaked out when I found out Dylan was in it, and was still absolutely astonished by his performing as Tom. That man is MAGICAL. A lot of people put "what tim wants" and "if I fail you" pretty low in their song rankings but like... They are EVERYTHING to me. Also KIM WHALEN??? A FELLOW GINGER SOPRANO WHO IS JUST SO GORGEOUS AND TALENTED AND I LOVE HER??? Also Jon as Wiggly is HORRIFYING and seeing him go from Paul in tgwdlm straight to Wiggly was JARRING. Linda Monroe is also ✨iconic✨. (I could ramble about this musical forever). It was definitely different in some ways than TGWDLM and was more serious tonally, but I really enjoyed it (and the music is AWESOME).

Trail to Oregon is also great!!! It's so silly and I LOVE seeing Joey Richter scurry back and forth putting on different hats to play almost the entire ensemble. Corey as Cleetus and the grandpa (Titty Mitty in the proshot) was phenomenal, and Lauren Lopez as Craphole is probably one of my favourite roles she's ever played. My absolute favourite moment of this entire musical is Joey Richter playing the baby buffalo whose family is about to get slaughtered. Baby buffalo Joey lives rent free in my mind. Also the best theatre blooper of all time comes from TTO (Joey forgetting his lines in independence my beloved)

NERDY PRUDES MUST DIE. THE SOUNDTRACK. THE SOUNDTRACK. I haven't watched this one as many times as the others, and it hasn't been around for as long so I don't think I've fully grown to appreciate it yet (and that's saying A LOT because I LOVE NPMD). ANGELA AS GRACE CHASTITY??? HELLO??? SHE IS EVERYTHING??? AND MAX JAGERMAN??? All of the performances in this are absolutely incredible. ALSO FINALLY GETTING MARIAH AS A LEAD IN A STARKID SHOW??? AS SOMEONE WHO'S BEEN IN THE FANDOM SINCE TGWDLM??? WE WERE WAITING SO PATIENTLY FOR THIS AND HOLY SHIT DID IT PAY OFF. Peter Spankoffski is everything and Cool As I Think I Am is ALSO everything. And omg Richie Lipschitz. I need to see him again in a nightmare time episode or something because that boy deserved SO MUCH BETTER!!! I think the score for this one was also incredible, and it was a super fun musical!!! It didn't permanently fuck up my brain and ruin my life like I was afraid it would, which disappointed me at first honestly, but it's nice to have a hatchetfield story that doesn't result in the immediate end of the world (although grace is totally gonna fuck shit up let's be honest).

Also I LOVE Nightmare Time. So much. Especially characters like Miss Holloway??? She. Is. EVERYTHING. Killer Track and Time Bastard are probably some of my favourite episodes, and I just think the effort put into the writing and editing and everything about nightmare time is just awesome. Hoping we get more down the line ✨🙏✨

I've also watched some of AVPM but I don't think I finished it. HOWEVER, Granger Danger is a certified BANGER and is also everything to me.

Thank you for coming to my TED BOOGtalk

#boog answers #starkid #sk #tgwdlm #black friday #tto #twisted #ask #answer #boog's mutuals

[tabbycat-of-hatchetfield]

Hatchetfield Is No Place For A Tabby Cat - Chapter 6: The School in the Heart of Shit City

Tabby arrived outside Hatchetfield High School at 7:10, 20 minutes before classes started. It was a large, brick building, just like many high schools were, but this one was a little different, on account of it being an ancient relic of the town’s past.

On the ride into Hatchetfield, her father had explained a lot about the people who built the town from the ground up all the way back in 1824. She had remembered him saying that the Waylons–the people that the Danehower family were descended from–had built the schoolhouse that eventually became Hatchetfield High, which was evident from the fact that the front face of said schoolhouse still stood proudly alongside the brick mass that was the rest of it, much of which was tacked on in the 80’s when the town started to expand a lot more. 

The schoolhouse was made from weathered, beaten wood. Tabby supposed that in its time, it would have been fresh and new, though. The entryway was grand for what was now a public school. 

She stepped up the front steps, which were made of ragged stone, something she thought she would have to complain to health and safety agents about if she got the chance, because a clumsy bitch like herself would have no trouble cracking her skull open on those steps. She heaved open the front door and was greeted with chaos. 

Absolute fucking chaos. 

There was a crowd of students in the front hall. It couldn’t have been more than 200 people, but still, that was pretty much the population of the school! She tried to slip in unnoticed, but was, as she should have expected, immediately noticed. 

“Nice sweater, fatty! Where’d you get it, kids’ section at Walmart? Nah, you’re probably too big for the kids’ section, who am I kidding?”

She eyed the perpetrator: a tall, dirty blonde kid with a jawline so square he looked like a whiter, uglier Minecraft Steve. He was cackling like a fucking hyena, surrounded by a posse of cheerleaders and beefy football bros. 

Oh yeah, this was gonna be great.

She ignored him, though tempted to stomp really hard on his stupid snow-white Nikes, and turned away. 

“Scared, you fucking cow? I haven’t seen you around. That’s weird.”

“Are you from Clivesdale?” One of the cheerleaders, with unnaturally pale blonde hair, put in. 

“Fuck Clivesdale!” The other cheerleader added hastily. They high-fived and giggled. 

“No, I’m from Canada.” Tabby said calmly. “Toronto, actually.” 

“Canada? What, do you bleed maple syrup or something?” Asked one of the guys, tall and dark-skinned. 

“No, Jason!” The leader guffawed, “They don’t bleed! They apologize to whatever cuts ‘em so much, the wounds just close right up.”

Tabby rolled her eyes, trying to let this blow over. She tried to walk away, but felt the first guy’s hand touch her shoulder, spinning her back around. 

“Listen, bitch,” he growled, his voice low and husky, “I don’t know who you think you are, but I know who I think you are. Another fucking nerd come to get the shit beat out of her.”

“Get her, Max!” One of his bros cheered, and ‘Max’ slapped him. “Not now, Kyle! Give me and fatty here some space!”

Max advanced on Tabby again, and she could see a malicious glimmer in his eyes. “You heard the man. Name’s Max. Max Jagerman. You better get used to hearing that name.”

“Tabatha Danehower. Nice to meet you. Never thought I could come across someone more ugly than the homeless guy I met downtown, but I guess you’ve proven me wrong, Max! Congratulations on that, truly incredible.”

Max’s eyes widened in anger. “Watch what you say.” He turned and left, with Kyle, Jason, and the two cheerleaders close behind. 

“What was that?!” 

Tabby spun around to see another figure standing there. A girl, slim and short. Calling her 5 feet tall would have been generous. She wore a thick, body-hiding striped sweater with a mushroom-shaped patch sewn onto it, a pair of bell-bottom red pants, and the ugliest sneakers Tabby had ever seen. She had headgear on, as well as a look on her face that reminded Tabby of a small prey animal, probably a rodent of some sort. 

“Uh..what was what?”

“You just told Max Jagerman off! You are so fucking dead.”

Tabby gulped back her anxiety. “And uhm…what exactly do you mean by that?”

“I mean now that you’ve done that, you’ve got a target on your back! Well, the fact that you’re not 5’5 and skinny already puts a target on your back, but you have enlarged the target! You have made it double in size!” 

“Thanks for the advice, but…I can just tell a teacher? Or like, the principal?

“Good luck with that. You think they’re really gonna expel the Hatchetfield Nighthawks quarterback?” The short girl giggled, arms wrapping around herself as if giving herself a hug. “You’re crazy. I think I’m in love with you.”

Tabby shifted her weight from one foot to the other, the awkwardness in the conversation escalating tenfold. 

“Good to know, ah…?”

“Ruth! Ruth Fleming. But, uh, people like Max just call me Flem-Wad.” 

“Good to know.” There was more awkward silence. Tabby cleared her throat again. “So…can you point me in the direction of the chemistry classroom?”

#tabby cat chat #hatchetfield rp #hatchetfield oc #hatchetfield #hatchetblr #tabatha danehower #my ocs #ocs #tabby danehower #HINPFATC

[lore-gore]

Some extra notes for my ride the cyclone roleplay, mainly about certain words that I would prefer not to be used. While I headcanon the choir to have died in 2016, it is important that we make this a safe space for all.

- Things like cr*pple, esk*mo, m*dg*t, and gy*sy are slurs and should NOT be used. It's seems many do not know this, so just in case. Handic*pped and sp*z should probably also be avoided. Considering most if not all of us are gay, I'd say you can say the regular gay slurs granted in a comedic way. But if you are uncomfortable with that, please speak up and I will ask for those those words to be avoided too.

- Please do not use narcissist/narcissistic/narcissism as an insult. It perpetuates the stigma around people with NPD. Here are some replacement words: egomaniac, egotistical, egocentric, self centered, self absorbed, self serving, self righteous, self obsessed, selfish, vain, arrogant, uncaring, inconsiderate, manipulative, gaslighter, prideful, haughty, holier-then-thou, pompous, snob, snobbish, snooty, condescending, conceited, lofty, stuck-up, smug, mean, uppity, uppish, cocky, big headed, high and mighty, full of themselves, above themselves, etc.

- Also do not use psychotic, delusional, delusion, bipolar, schizophrenic, or schizophrenia, unless you are talking about the disorders. And don't use hallucination/hallucinating/hallucinate or paranoia/paranoid as hyperboles. Use them correctly and appropriately.

- And do not use the words psych0, schiz0, psychopath, or sociopath.

If there are any other words you are uncomfortable with being used, please let me know! And while it's important to listen to disabled people, it's also important to remember that fighting ableism is more than a list of words. These are simply words I've heard people whom those words apply to say to avoid, and even then they may disagree. So personally I just exclude words that are linked directly to the disorders. And again, these are just words I'd prefer for you not to use. I know this is a lot to remember, and I don't want you to stress out about it. Ultimately it is your choice whether or not to exclude those words, I am just encouraging you to do so.

Additionally, before reblogging as your character, state in the comments you are doing so. We want everyone to have a turn to speak.

Also I think during the roleplay we should DM the others before we start a new thread, just to make sure nobody has any schedule conflicts that day. (Or is like, sleeping because time differences.) I'm going to be working some days, so there will be certain times I will be unable to do it.

Also if you know ANYONE who would want to take the role of Constance, please let me know!

And DM me if you have any questions!!!

@krowsselfindulgy @max--jagerman @democracyrockzz

[holyjagerman]

so you’re telling me that grace chasity put together a plan originally to harm the reputation of max jagerman but instead max was so brave he fought off the “ghost” and “skele’on” and really enjoyed this plan. that it was the nicest thing anyones ever done for him. grace chasity unintentionally gave max jagerman the nicest gift ever and you’re gonna look at me and tell me they’re not soulmates?

#max jagerman #grace chasity #whats their ship name #holy ghost? #dirty soup? #chaserman? #idk man #nerdy prudes must die #starkid #npmd #i just have a lot of feelings about grace chasity #i just have a lot to say about max jagerman

[justasmallbloginabigklainefandom]

Nerdy Prudes must die thoughts, written 10 minutes after I first watched the show

Not gonna lie, I don’t know if I liked it that much. It was fine. But also one thing that Hatchetfield has taught me that it gets better the more I watch it, because on the first watch it’s always an overwhelming experience

My aroace ass will probably never watch some of the more sexual scenes ever again, but whatever. It’s not for me, and that is fine. It is for other people, also fine.

I loved the group of nerds: Steph, Grace, Richie, Ruth and Peter.

That being said I didn’t really get invested in the love relationship between Steph and Peter. I just didn’t feel it.

I also didn’t really care for Grace and Max, but it sure was interesting, especially since Grace giving up “her chastity” worked so well. Huh, good thing I didn’t skip through the whole bathtub scene. It was uncomfortable to watch for me, but it did establish that Grace did want him. She wanted it and it took Max down. Grace choosing her sexual agency to save the day was great.

MAX JAGERMAN IS ONE OF THE BEST STARKID VILLAINS

A lot was happening. Again, it was overwhelming. It all tied up nicely in the end, cause in the first act there were some moments that made me go “uh... why?” and I was glad all got wrapped up

Don’t really have anything to say about the songs.

BBQ MONOLOGUES. It isn’t a Hatchetfield musical without a show within the show and I love that Starkid knows this.

I like the small references to other Hatchetfield parts. I unfortunately seem to gave missed a Boy Jerry moment, but Paul and Emma! The hot chocolate! Fuck Clivesdale! The music! I loved the audience’s reaction to the Nightmare Time theme at the end of act 1 cause same.

ALSO THE WAY THE AUDIENCE GASPED WHEN IT WAS DARK ON STAGE AND THEN YOU ONLY HEARD WIGGLY’S VOICE

The whole Lords in Black sequence was STELLAR. I’ve already watched it twice. It was so fucking good.

I do wonder how watchable the show is for someone who has no prior knowledge of the lore. As in, this maybe isn’t the best Starkid musical for beginners, because if you don’t know the history of the Lords in Black, then the mayor suddenly talking about this must be very out of nowhere.

I am obsessed with the ending of Grace being evil. I don’t know if she was changed or if this has woken something within her. It has shown in Abstinence Camp that she can go far, same here when she stole the gun. I think it works as a more open-ended ending, but I do have questions. Is this the Christian guilt manifesting? She chose her own pleasure and her repression cannot handle that? Or was this all part of a bigger plan that started formulating once she met the Lords? Nice ending.

The tech was also cool. I loved seeing Starkid on a bigger stage.

#lb 2023 #lb watching

[holyjagerman]

the Thing about shipping grace and max is that i don’t want to au them a happy ending i want no NEED them to be the fucked up half ghost half sex crazed lunatic couple they are. like a really fucked up Bonnie and Clyde

#npmd #nerdy prudes must die #starkid #i just have a lot of feelings about grace chasity #grace chasity #i just have a lot to say about max jagerman #max jagerman

[holyjagerman]

max jägerman never goes to the Hatchetfield Haunted Maze with his friends because he’s banned after he punched one of the scare actors. at least, that’s what he tells them. what actually happened is that when he was 13, he pissed his pants only 20 minutes in and his dad made him finish the maze anyways. he hasn’t gone since

#nerdy prudes must die #starkid #max jägerman #babygirl max jägerman #max jagerman #babygirl max jagerman #i just have a lot to say about max jagerman #headcanon

[holyjagerman]

idk why this happened but i saw a douchebag bully die and turn into a sparkly murder ghost who ultimately loses because he wanted to fuck one girl really bad and thought “blorbo”

#babygirl max jagerman #i just have a lot to say about max jagerman #max jagerman #love my evil ghost babygirl #nerdy prudes must die #starkid