#i hope op can continue this i'm praying

[literaticat]

I'm at my wit's end. I've spent a decade trying to break through - 10 years with 5 novels coming super close with a variety of big publishers, who rave about my writing, ideas, etc. Feedback has been mostly positive. One even rejected saying "I don't know why we're rejecting this, it's EXACTLY what we're looking for and ticks all our boxes, but we feel compelled to reject it anyway." Is there just a "Do Not Publish" sign on my head? How to keep pushing ahead after so long and so much rejection?

(OP continues...) "Sorry about the rant, Jenn, and I know there's not much you can say as you don't know my specific situation. But it's just maddening. 10+ years of my life! I know everyone faces rejection, but I seem to mostly get positive feedback and so many "close calls" of almost getting a deal - a lot of interest, but then it just peters out. That "compelled to reject anyway" just made me start feeling like I'm just fated to never be published, no matter what? I'm unagented now, starting from scratch..."

OK first of all -- that rejection, if that is literally what they said, is utterly insane. I have to presume (HOPE? PRAY?) that you are paraphrasing, that that is what it *felt* like to you, but that's not LITERALLY what they said??? Because there are certainly things where, on the surface, yes, this is what a publisher is looking for and it "ticks the boxes", but ultimately, it doesn't have that X-factor, je ne sais quois, or whatever -- so I can see a publisher saying something like, "while the writing is admirable and the premise is interesting, ultimately, we weren't compelled enough to make an offer for publication" -- which is ALMOST what you said, but there's a key difference that makes it actually normal and not insane. Because in YOUR version, it sounds like they are under an imperius curse or something, where they don't know what they are doing or why they are doing it, they just have to do it, even though it is against what WOULD be their better judgment if they weren't cursed. And... it's wild to think that a publisher would make a statement like that. (Maybe they were having a very OFF DAY???) -- BUT ANYWAY, on to the crux of your question/rant:

I understand your frustration. If it makes you feel any better (??), you're not alone. I know many -- MANY -- MANY career authors, who spent 10 years honing their craft, trying and failing, getting rejections, getting close-but-no-cigars, etc. I was chatting with a wise (and now famous) author I know, who spent 10 years or so in the query/wrong-agent/rejection/close-call trenches. She told me a theory that I feel pretty sure is right, though I don't have proof per se, it does track with my observations. She said:

Just about everyone who sticks with writing or the arts in general as a career has about a ten-year rough patch. That doesn't mean it takes everyone ten years to get published! (Though it does take LOTS of people 10+ years) -- Some lucky people get their break a lot sooner than that. BUT. Everyone has to pay the piper that ten year fee, either all at once, or in installments. So let's say you sell your book right away and start raking in the accolades etc -- fab! Just know that nobody stays popular and beloved forever, and at some point, the ten year slump is coming for you. Aren't you lucky that you're getting yours out of the way now?

OK, if that didn't work for you, how about this:

How to keep pushing ahead after so long and so much rejection?

You know you don't have to, right?

Like, if writing and seeking traditional publication is making you miserable -- you can stop. In fact, stopping may be a great idea.

I say this not to be discouraging, but rather, encouraging, actually. I encourage you to give yourself permission to prioritize your own mental and emotional well-being.

If you realize you miss writing and can't live without it -- go back to it! But maybe instead of having "publication" as your goal, your goal can be writing for the pure joy of it, without worrying about future queries or would-be agents or anyone else's expectations. What freedom! Embrace that!

Then when you do have a brand-new shiny manuscript, you can decide your next steps. Maybe it's trying again for traditional publishing, and this is the turn around the track that changes everything. (It should be close, if the 10 year theory is correct!)

OR, maybe it's self-publishing. (Lots of people have a lot of success there -- maybe you're one of them!) --

OR, maybe it's just chilling out and writing some more for your own pleasure -- creating art for the sake of creating it, for fun, for self-fulfillment, etc. Like, you know, a normal hobby, that nobody is expecting you to monetize or make into a "gig".

[katsukikoi]

your so pretty

character; yuji itadori x f!reader + sukuna x f!reader

part 1 part 2

warnings; swearing

theme; Sukuna's past, yuji's crush. ( strong f!reader )

Itadori was new to the jujutsu world, he weaves around missions and finishes them quickly. Although, he can only do so much as a student.

So, since his “death” he has to stick with Gojo sensei.

He never minded, he actually rathers. He would happily do all of the tasks and missions the albino man gave him, with a smile.

“yes gojo sensei!” he would say, one hand with his thumb up, and the other on his hip. Unknowingly sassy.

He never could remember the pact he made with sukuna. Which made the poor boy drag his head in the mud.

Sukuna would often respond nonchalantly, always brushing him off and cursing him for being stupid. This would make the poor boy pout and huff, annoyed if anything. But, nonetheless he perseveres.

Gojo said he had a surprise for him, making the boy get excited hoping it was time to go back and re-reveal himself to the world.

"i have someone you need to meet!" gojo spoke, with a large smug smile.

"huh? i thought i wasn't allowed to see anyone.." he spoke, with a confused, but cute pout. He blinked like an innocent puppy.

"This one, wont make a peep." he winked, making the salmon haired boy even more confused.

"yuji-kun, meet your new best friend, y/n!!" he yelled out, opeing his arms out as he waited for her to appear.

"so, there is nothing there?" sukuna laughed, his eye opened under yuji's as he tried to slap him away.

"sorry i'm late, sensei. I got caught up." the girl spoke, walkimg into the door. Her jujutsu energy pouring out of control even sukuna could feel it deep in his soul. God, it felt so familiar to him. It felt like he yearned for it even after he was sealed.

There stood, a girl. Similar looking to gojo, a very small section of sleek white like hair on the front, the rest chocolate brown with golden strands in different places. Her eyes shined gold, the purest of the metal. Her eye lashes, long and thick, her lips, healthy and soft looking. Making sukuna gulp. He knew this woman, but where from exacting?

Yuji was a different story, the boy greeted her with a smile, telling her he like women like Jennifer Lawrence.

"nice to meet you, itadori-kun. Personally, i like men like senami shinazugawa." she bowed, much like he did. Her smile catching a sly fox look.

"woah! from the anime?" he spoke, excitedly.

"yes! you know it?" she excitedly giggled, looking up to the taller boy he nodded quickly.

"hmh! what episo-" before he could continue, gojo satoru laughed. Interupting them. " yuji, y/n. You two, are coming with me." he spoke, grabbing them both yuji by the hood of his jacket, while y/n bridle style. Making sure to cover her skirt from praying eyes.

“what? gojo satoru, are you using them for a human shield?” the cruse boredly spoke.

“hi! i hope you don’t mind :) i have students.” gojo smiled, brightly at the mt fuji curse.

“wah! he looks like mt fuji.” yuji spoke, grabbing y/n’s calf, in awe.

“hey brat, dont touch.” sukuna grumbled, his voice unheard as yuji ignored it. Still holding on to the poor girls leg as she glared at the curse.

“jogo? still looking homeless.” y/n spoke, a wild smirk on her face as she got out of gojos grasp to stand in the middle of the two men.

y/n clapped her hands, ready for a fight as a golden tattoo glowed, ready to be summed.

“neh, y/n. Hold back.” gojo smirk, petting the smaller girls head.

“eh!?” she spoke, huffing as she watched the scene play out.

As the girl zoned out, she didnt notice that the two of them, yuji and herself were currently falling to a spikey dead wood pile. “thats not good huh?” she spoke out a loud. she grabbed yuji as she moved her hand in front of her. “tsunami.” she whispered, summoning a great wave of water, destroying the pile of wood as she landed on top of the water. Carrying yuji bridal style.

“put the brat down. This is embrassing.” sukuna mumbled, sitting on his bones he watched interestedly.

Watching the girls every step, calculating her moves. He was tempted to keep all of his eyes open, just to make sure, but he decided against it. Thinking it was a waste of time.

———

“itadori, your curse-“ *smack* “energy is too high.” the girl spoke, reading a book next to him as she watched him get smacked for the 18th time.

y/n sighed, putting a book mark in her page as she stood up. She went behind the couch and patted the boys hair, making him blush and look up.

“ill get some food, kay?” she asked, making the boy smile, blush coating his cheeks as he nodded. “m’kay.” he squeaked out.

—-

“go yuji! you can do it!” she spoke, watching at the boy downed a weaker shinigami. Jumping for joy as she proudly taught him black flash.

its been 2 months since they got partnered up, not once has the king of curses made a peep.

until, “brat no.2 fight me.” sukuna’s mouth smirk, his eye glaring with blood lust.

“no, i wont let you.” itadori spoke, covering him. “sorry y/n-senpai.” he spoke shyly.

“sure sukuna. How many fingers you at? 4?” she asked, cracking her back and neck.

“extention.” sukuna spoke, smirking as he did so.

The tattoos filling yujis face as sukuna changed his look. y/n blushed abit as she looked away for a second before turning back to him.

She watched him come at her with full force like he did gojo. “i wonder.” she spoke, her long nail ripping her sleeve, “whale, of the jade chamber.” she spoke, a green whale the size of a large jelly fish swum around sukuna. Making him laugh, “really!? i overestimated you!” he laughed,

Y/n came at him with roaring speed, as fast as a full grown cheetah. Eyes shining gold, she let her knee fully hit his face. The whale growing more green as it amplified the hit breaking the mans jaw.

He groaned as he gripped his jaw, “you bitch.” he smirked, “i like it! more, give me more power!” he yelled, exitedly.

The girl tilted her head, as she watched the man pause sighing, and rolling his eyes. He let yuji return as he barked out in pain. “ouch!” he spoke, y/n rushed towards him, using her reverse technique to heal him.

“what happened?” he asked, thanking her.

“i.. sukuna happend.” she spoke.

—

“and i think thats the best episode we watched. Tengen is so flashy!” itadori gushed as he leaned on her chest has he cuddled her, so sweetly and kindly. so repectfully, and so innocent.

“hn! senami is better.” she spoke, playing with his hair letting her nails comb through.

They became close, this made her scared. Making her heart drop, what the hell did she do?

she stopped watching the series as she watched yuji, just looking at him made her heart flutter. “shit.” she mumbled, no one but sukuna heard. Not that she knew anyways.

The two teens stayed in that position until, itadori fell asleep. This caused the girl to yawn.

“you care for this vessel.” sukuna spoke, making the girl snap her head towards him. No longer was it yuji, but sukuna. Laying right where yuji was, unmoving.

“ha? i-“ she tried to lie, and look away, but she felt sukuna shift, making her move herself back, preparing herself for a future fight.

Sukuna looked at her, with praying eyes, a hunter; hungry for her blood. “tell me, bunny. why do you?” he grinned, stradding the girl, as she tried to calm her heart rate. She cant fight that well at night.

“so, what. why would you care?” she asked, as she watched him trail his fringers around her hip and collar bones.

She gulped as he became hyper fixated on this tattoos hands, a type of black dye coated his nails. She shivered, she continued to watch as they made contact. Sukuna moving her con with his finger, forcing her to meet his red crimson eyes.

“he doesnt deserve you.” he grunted out.

“what?” she asked.

—-

i hope you enjoyed, it was kinda shit ngl. But lmk if you like it!

dont repost my writing, translate, or rewrite.

Only, reblog, comment and follow. Sent requests too!

much love,

Atlas. 💣✨

#yuji itadori #yuji x reader #sukuna #ryomen sukuna #jujutsu kaisen ryomen #jjk x fem!reader #jjk series #x reader #fpyシ #tumblr fyp #fyp2023 #fanfic #jjk fanfic #i wrote this #writing #follow #like #please comment #jjk sukuna #jjk yuji #female #fem reader #female x male #slow burn #cliffhanger

[pretty-weird-ideas]

Okay... so earlier I posted a few things without the proper tags because I felt like it wasn't necessary to say publicly, but right now antiblackness seems to keep escalating and people keep getting away with shit like this.

The next time you see antiblack posts especially vagues, check the comments and likes. I'm not being funny about this, I've been trying to be nice and quiet about antiblackness and blogs actively proposing alt-right talking points in this fandom by not saying things about it. But this is a pattern of larger blogs agreeing in secret with smaller racist ranters.

Whenever you see a virulently hateful response to a small black blog or what seems to be an antiblack rant, please I BEG of you all to check the comments and likes of said commentary. You will be surprised to see how many large blogs not only agree with the antiblack sentiment they're spreading but also are encouraging them to continue this sort of behavior.

We have blogs that are far larger than the blogs they're attacking, in the comments calling these black blogs "antiwhite" and "reverse racists", but nobody checks the comments. They know to hide their more controversial rhetoric in comments and likes. These smaller blogs who wanted approval from them then walk away from these large blogs and call these smaller blogs SLURS.

Post 499 of "The reason I don't follow black people, is because they block me" has blogs agreeing with them but never have been taken to task because they're hoping you genuinely don't check the comments or likes.

If you really truly care, I need you to start remembering names. It isn't even a difficult equation, no more than 1+1. It's blatant and clear once you start reading and using critical thought to find context and start questioning the motives behind vague posts against black blogs. These antiblack blogs aren't even smart enough to use alts, they're brazen with this sort of thing.

Antiblack users are begging and praying every night that you don't check for context or read comments when they drag smaller black blogs. They know better not to say this on their own blogs or reblog, they wait until they can comment and agree in silence, it's what they do.

They think you don't read, please prove them wrong.

These larger blogs that are creating hit lists of black blogs are literally testing your intelligence and ability to check their rhetoric, please.

#iwtv #black fandom #interview with the vampire #vampire chronicles

[deathsbestgirl]

well now i'm thinking about tfwid + the cancer arc (inspired by op's tags in this post)

like. scully didn't believe what mulder was saying, but the emotion behind it did impact her. a lot. and she believes in mulder so she went looking to see if she could prove anything he said, and she found some of the names he talked about.

scully says in one of the christmas carol flashbacks that she doesn't believe in fate. she believes people make their own path. and she basically tells mulder the same thing. "would it have changed some of the ways we looked at each other?" "i wouldn't change a day."

scully doesn't believe in fate. i think she feels as melissa did. it's a nice idea, to find your person in every life and be with them in whatever capacity. it doesn't change how she feels though. she would have made the same choices regardless. because they were choices. it's something she reiterates to him in all things and the truth. what she would have missed.

and mulder...i don't think he likes the idea of fate either. because then they can't really change anything, what happens is completely out of their control.

so when scully tells him about her cancer, he can't accept that she's going to die. he doesn't want to watch her die (again). mulder is determined to save her, break the cycle of watching his best friend, his most important person, die. so when scully tells him she's going to live, that smile on his face is relief & hope & love. neither of them are in it alone. he believes in her, and she believes in him, and in that moment it's enough.

and until gethsemane & reduxes, he's safe in his delusion. (or maybe elegy, which is how we get to demons.) when her cancer has metastasized, he starts to lose up. he smiles at her in her hospital room, as she looks at him with pain & regret. he doesn't want to let her see his pain & worry, but she already knows. when he goes to her side as she's sleeping, he completely breaks down. he doesn't think he can save her, he's doing everything he can. to expose the men who did this to her, from inside the fbi. praying for a miracle cure. because she's the one person who deserves it, because there's no life without her. in fight the future he tells her he can't do it without her, he knew this already during her cancer.

and when none of the treatments are working, and they're discussing the options left...mulder finally has the microchip that could save her. scully decides to try it (and continue treatment?)

for now, mulder is safe. he doesn't have to watch his best friend die in this life.

#at least not yet #the field where i died #mulder and scully #dana scully #fox mulder #the x files #cancer arc

[gardenofnoah]

feels like...

i have been in such a writing rut BUT writing this made me feel better. i'm sorry but i do not believe the girlies that think katsuki is planning elaborate proposals. i think it goes down just like this and i love him so much it makes me sick♡

wc: 845ish cw: gn reader, fluff

The cicadas call in, strong and shrill, through the bedroom window. Under his fingertips, your pulse thrums beneath your skin. Steady, constant. A relief to him.

You've never asked him why his hand curves around the back of your neck like a reflex— it's never seemed to bother you, with the way you lean into his touch. If you should ever decide to ask him, he's not sure he'd have the words to give you an explanation. Maybe that's why you haven't. You were considerate of him like that.

Bakugo Katsuki can identify his feelings. He's put in the work in the years you've been together, and it's at least given him that-- anxiety creeps up his spine and coils in his lungs. Rage sets fire to his nerve endings with the hope that one will be the catalyst to the destruction he's so adept at unfurling from the palms of his hands. Happiness is a flood that pools around his ankles, warm and not at all scary like he thinks it ought to be. Longing, usually for you, makes his teeth ache.

But love is the feeling of your pulse against his skin. The expansion of your chest with every inhale you pull in. The stretch of your muscles as you mold your body to the contours of his own.

Love is the knowledge that you are alive and here with him.

He knows this, feels it when it happens (so often, as bodily functions do), and he can't say it. So instead, he speaks into the silence of the room.

"Been thinking about something."

You hum, your chest vibrating softly against his, and he gets that feeling again.

He pauses—braces himself for his own words—because he knows that the thing he’s about to say will not be what he wants it to be. Katsuki can identify his feelings, but he has not gotten to the part where he knows how to verbalize them. That takes much more time, and a much more developed vocabulary. Possibly less expletives.

He feels the familiar slither against the inside of his chest and ignores it, because he has been thinking about this (agonizing maybe), and he can't keep it in his brain anymore.

"You ever think about gettin' married?"

He braces himself for a withdrawal, or at least the feeling of your muscles tensing against him—it doesn't come. Instead, you lift your head, resting your chin against the arm that spans his chest to look him in the eye. Another scraping twist in his chest. He fights the urge to look up at the ceiling.

"Married to you?" you ask, softly. Still, he deflects.

"To anyone."

"Mm," the smile that spreads across your face is slow and knowing, because what he wants to ask floats around you like so many balloons. You spare his pride anyway.

"Sometimes," you murmur, "though I don't think I would be interested in like, the traditional way of doing things."

By now, the coiling in his chest has made it to his throat. He can only look at you and hope you take it as a prompt to continue.

"I'm not one for surprise proposals," you tell him through slightly smooshed cheeks against his chest, "or big, elaborate ceremonies. I actually think I would like everything to be private," you pause, looking straight inside him, "you know, just you and me."

"Really?" It's the first word he can choke out, mostly because the hope and the relief he feels join forces to take a baseball bat to the thing in his chest.

You hum your affirmation, eyes still on his.

He's quiet for a long time, after that. Your eyes close eventually, a soft smile still pulling at your lips, like you know what's coming and you're there and ready, but you're waiting patiently for him to meet you. You are always patient—he thinks it's a kindness that he's not always deserved. He takes a deep breath, and prays to whoever is listening that he doesn't stutter.

"Do you want to marry me?"

Your eyes flutter open again, but your expression doesn't change, save for the way your smile stretches a little farther across your face.

"Are you asking my opinion or are you proposing?"

Katsuki rolls his eyes at that, scoffing a little. "Never mind," he says, mouth pulling at the corners, "M’not asking at all."

You smile at him, all teeth and a feigned noise of indignance, reaching up to flick his nose.

"Aren't you supposed to have a ring or something?" you ask after a moment, and the tail end of what's been rooting around in his chest cavity slaps him in the gut.

"D'ya want one?" he asks quietly. You pause, lips pursed like you're thinking it over.

"No," you say, and he feels the thing shrink from a boa constrictor to an earthworm, "I want, like, a sword or something."

And Katsuki laughs out loud at that, something rare and warm that makes you close your eyes whenever you hear it.

"Fuckin' weirdo," he mumurs fondly, reaching up to thread his fingers through the ends of your hair, "I'll get you whatever you want."

Warmth pools at his ankles, and his lungs feel clearer than they ever have.

this fic belongs to me (@b-writes-things). i do not allow anyone to repost, edit, or reproduce this work.

#this is incredibly self indulgent #i don't even want to get married. but for bkg i would #i am yearning for a dead man #help me jesus #bakugo #bakugo katsuki #katsuki bakugo #my hero academia #mha bakugo #bakugou #bakugo x reader #bakugo x you #bakugo fluff #bakugo x gn reader #bwritesthings

[artsy-hobbitses]

So you already have ttb anime opening songs list. Do you have a ttb anime closing songs list as well?

Follow up from here for those curious!

SEASON 1 (Pre-War) Ending: Fukisusabu kaze no naka de by WAG (Gensomaden Saiyuki)

Running along the edge of the cliff We decide not to look back Not speaking even one word Always without repentance Looking up at the sky The pouring rain falls down And as we wonder if it had let up It starts falling again on our heads If we stir up our emotions, We can easily determine our dreams Determine our love, Our friends, our lives In the midst of the raging wind Can I really throw away my pride? The colors of regret and truth Make my heart dance In these revolutionary days, I Always want to stay with you!

I feel like I don't need to explain the reason behind this choice on the account of it sounding like a Badass Ikemen Quartet and the HYSTERICAL amount of MegOP in. If you want men enthusiatically belting out Gay Subtext devotion-in-love-and-friendship rock type themes, Saiyuki's been doing that since the early 2000s. This theme is so Barricade Boys I'm slapping it on any modern iteration of Les Amis de l'ABC. (Also I have Lambros on my mind and it WILL NOT STOP just imagine them, Hotrod and Bee on vocals)

SEASON 2 Ending: Uso by SID (FMA Brotherhood)

Say, the sky we saw that day, That scarlet sky Do you remember it from that day? We made a promise and a vow While the early summer wind circled us And we clung close together Your forced smile Holds elongated shadows I pretend not to notice and continue on All the while waiting for you To deliver some news at the table Empty nights and mornings that will never arrive I could see them from a mile away Say, the sky we saw that day, That scarlet sky I'm sure you'll remember it one day While holding the promise we couldn't keep We take our first steps down out own paths

A narrative follow-up from the blow-out between the Rebellion in Season One, who are now divided into the Decepticons and the Autobots. Do you remember our promise and what we fought for? I'm sure you will some day, says OP, even as we walk different paths now.

SEASON 3: Ending: Mind Game by Tamaki (Tiger & Bunny)

I daydreamed in a corner Of the city stained ash-gray And somehow I started pondering My raison d'etre But I never know myself & dreams & truth anymore, anymore… more… In this wretched world, I asked myself, "Just what can I do?" Because I got the feeling that your smile taught me that Pain like discovering the light touched me: Yes, that's the feeling I got In order to attain an ephemeral dream by their own hands, All people lose sight of even eternal truth The one who gave light to the indelible, sad tomorrow Was none other than just one (I want to believe) We can share both the past and the future, always!

Rung (Past) and Sari (Future). Also fourth stanza is very Sari to Isaac. Also Drift/Ratchet, as Drift defects to the Autobots this season.

SEASON 4 Ending: Every Heart by BOA (Inuyasha)

Tell me babe How many times I've shed my tears? Every heart Every heart is not a gentle one Why can't I I can never share my loneliness? Every heart doesn't know what to say or what to do Was afraid of darkness cause I felt like I was left alone So I prayed for help to a distant million stars Round and round the planets revolve around the sun And they always seek after love and peace forever more Growing, growing whoa baby we can work it out Look up at the sky, every heart is shining on today

'Every heart is not a gentle one' feat. Sunstreaker/Sideswipe's blowout, Windblade and Starscream's sort-of-relationshing angst (as Starscream tries and fails to show her that the man she believes still lives inside him---that hopeful senator from the past---is dead, when he UGH falls into the trap of being a Decent Man)

Also a lonely LONELY season feat. Mirage with Hound Missing and his Ironhide-induced crisis.

Last stanza hitting the 'Autobots rebuilding On Griffin Rock And Finding Reasons To Hope For Tomorrow Even As It Gets Ever Harder' mood.

SEASON 5 Ending: Alone by Mikuni Shimokawa (Gensomaden Saiyuki)

All of the people coming and going Bear heavy burdens, Searching for tomorrow Within the heat haze wavering in the distance Feelings like sand Falling through my hands… Back then, the words that pierced my heart Suddenly started to throb with pain, but… I've searched for pieces of myself, counting the endless nights all the while. These feelings are becoming so certain I almost lose myself Right now, without fail I will walk forward However far

Because I REALLY wanted to end on this BEAUTIFUL note and it's my series kfhsdgfjsdgfjsfh but seriously:

First stanza encapsulates how the war has affected everyone, Decepticons and Autobots alive, who are now working together and genuinely had always wanted a better tomorrow for everyone.

"I've searched for pieces of myself" stanza, like literally 85% of the cast is in goddamn pieces at the moment and are holding on by their Nakama Thread. It's everyone--Megatron, Mirage, Starscream, OP himself, RUNG, the Lambros, Drift, YOU NAME IT.

This version of the song will be used over the finale itself which will show rebuilding efforts/how the cast is doing post-war. Stuff covered will be, among others:

Sideswipe waking up from his coma and his garbled proposal to Strongarm

Windblade visiting Starscream in prison as she tries to comfort Starscream who's messy snotty crying in happiness that she finally managed to pass a bill to outlaw the creation of new CCs so no child will ever go through what he went through.

OP reading/writing with Megs who's in prison.

Laserbeak and Soundwave helping Ravage with his physical therapy as he slowly regains use of his legs.

Wreckers and Springer visiting Kup's grave with Dakshi who is now Springer's dog.

Hound introducing Mirage to his parents

Prowl front row at Jazz's concert.

Bee and Co finally get their degrees.

Lightbright exploring the universe with her new Titan

A decorated mural of the Autobots and Decepticons who died in the final battle against Unicron.

#Inbox #Humanformers AU #TTB

[whentheycryvideos]

Higurashi: When They Cry - Sotsu OP Full (English Cover) 【Julia】 Analogy

Lyrics

The roar of distortion our future exudes Doesn't feel a thing for the suffering of those stuck in loops

The power of our words that glittered with hope Has been snatched away, and like that, escaped into the unknown

Compress and then release again They peek through the gaps left behind The lights who choose what roll we'll get Even if they're a sign,

I want to be with you Within the one remaining Torch that continues ever burning We are one, lit by the bright karma

A single string of Fused emotions bouncing back and forth, Clashing endlessly in dissonance Like a thorn you can't remove, it grows Noxiously intimate

Our tie that binds us, Though we test it every time it's forged, Regardless, Our reality collapses in As we pray to save what we hold close Within the ever resting forest

This hurricane of chaos Fades away in the waves As we adventure Beyond the nature

The dreams coveted from the tomorrow that I chose- I can only wish for the happiness I hope they'll expose

The scenery I've always seen, that warmth I recall, Those values I have internalized, we'll see where they fall.

Compress and then release again Down the roads we're meant to pursue, Beyond the tears we've yet to shed, Dice fly to spite you

I'm always on your side Among the cressets that stay Lit, side by side, and stand face-to-face. We're visions; our kindred gaze enchains us

A single string of Powerful, unwavering affect With surrounding sacred memories Forms a rite to find out why your eyes Glisten with sympathy

Our bonds revive, but Every time we put them to the test, Regardless, Every scar sustained grows further deep, Morphing into sounds of dark and light Which mingle with our melancholy

Even when you're not with me, It connects me to you; That place we treasured, Smiling together

A single string of Fused emotions bouncing back and forth, Clashing endlessly in dissonance Like a thorn you can't remove, it grows Noxiously intimate

Our tie that binds us, Though we test it every time it's forged, Regardless, Our reality collapses in As we pray to save what we hold close Within the ever resting forest

This hurricane of chaos Fades away in the waves As we adventure Beyond the nature

#higurashi #sotsu #higurashi sotsu #analogy #when they cry #english cover #Youtube #Those Sisters You Know

[shadesofdejavu]

Today, I saw a patient with RC repair 17/52 post op. Initially his shoulder hit full ROM finally.. then I had to go and do MMT for his ext rot.. thats when we heard a "SNAP" sound at his posterior shoulder. It was the most traumatic loudest sound to me in the whole gym at that moment. It was soon followed by a high increase in pain and his inability to raise his arm more than 90deg. He said "feels like it was just like before my op again". Panicked, I quickly ran to Jeremy for help and told him everything.. felt my whole body temperature rising and everywhere getting flushed. Really had no clue what next steps to take. So I just did some gentle shoulder ROM exercises with him thereafter but it really did not alleviate his pain in anyway. The time for the session was running out and Jeremy quickly came to my rescue and assessed him for me so that I could continue to see my next patient as well. He was also supposed to have a patient but EeLeng quickly sensed everything that was wrong and volunteered to see his patient so that he could see and assess mine.

Thankfully my next and last case was a fairly more straightforward knee pain case.. cos I was totally out of it. Couldn't really focus or compose my thoughts that well... but of course I hope I hid all these emotions well and put on an excellent professional front still.

MSOPD parents came to talk to me after and were all really supportive and loving. Continuously asking me if "I was okay" as they stared straight into my eyes. Reassuring me that I did not do anything that was not completely wrong based on protocol and that it could have happened to anybody. We were supposed to have a MS team discussion on goal settings for the upcoming financial year after our last patient today but they sensed that my heart and mind wasn't in the right place no matter how many times I said I was alright.

They guided me to text the doctor and went through the case over and over, teaching me what to check for after such a thing happens. For swelling, subluxation, bruising, lag sign, apprehension test etc. The doctor just replied "oh dear".

Went for a 50min run on the treadmill after..... ran everything away.....

How blessed I am that both of them were there. How good God is. How could He have provided me with such support when this unfortunate event occurred. Why did he provide me with such support when thus unfortunate event occurred. I am the worst physio in AH.. I don't have the same heart for my patients as the others do. I just want to end work on time.. I can't ever talk to Jem and EL cos I'm so awkward and don't know what to say no matter how nice they are. Jeremy bought me an egg sandwich today for lunch too btw. Lol.

I haven't used tumblr in such a long time. But I would really like to remember God's graciousness and love through my MSOPD parents today.

Jeremy will see the same patient on Monday, that's 3 days later over the weekend. I pray the patient is alright... I can still replay the snap sound in my head. Dear God, I pray that his shoulder is alright.

[firebirdsdaughter]

Spoilers/Leaks…

… From people who saw a prescreening of the Zero-One movie here.

#Kamen Rider Zero-One #Kamen Rider Zero One #Zero-One Spoilers #Zero One Spoilers #the Ark is really shaping up to be the final big bad imo… #well at least half of the big bad #I'm gonna continue holding out hope that we'll end w/ all six Riders coming together #bc it'd HumaGear and humans coming together #in particular the two completely opposite sides of the spectrum #if you can get Isamu and Horobi to work together? #no one could ever give you crap about being able to create a future for humans and HumaGear #seriously #come one guys #look at the potential! #DX #I still can't believe I was originally one of the people arguing that those shots in the op were just aesthetic #and didn't actually mean all six would join up #and now I keep praying they do #esp those last shots (though my husband Horobi being the only one facing away still scares me) #and the shot of Aruto crawling through the wreckage of Hiden bc it shows ALL the Drivers lying around #and the lyric over it is talking about forging our own destiny #and the fact that all six are in the title sequence etc. #basically #PLEASE be foreshadowing! DX #Binary Retro Rider

[astersofthesky]

I decided to reread the MHA LN Chapter 4, you know, the canon bkdk angsty slow-burn fanfic 😌😌 Spreading the BKDK LN agenda because WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT THIS MORE !!

Anyway, I FOUND ANOTHER TRANSLATION but sadly OP haven't finished it yet 😢

And since I need an emotional outlet so I can scream at how they're so canon, Im'ma do it here ahwjdhfjsh 👀✨

Warning: Long post; potential manga spoilers

– I forgot that this chapter literally started with the angst 😭 Deku saying that he can't imagine having lunch with Kacchan is like a pain in the gut. He just wanna be friends with his Kacchan again 😢

– One word, ✨SOULMATES ✨ afshshahah PLS, even the universe can't help but ship them together ��✋ they're fruityness is on whole a new level I CAN'T 💚🧡

– I see what you're doing Bakugou 👀 You really can't leave your sweet broccoli behind huh?? Also, crybaby Macchan and aggressive Takkun?? 🤔 Do I need to say more? 🧐

– If that's not flirting then idk what is 🤷 also, "In front of my soba? Really?" (Todoroki, probably)

– There's no ss but I just wanna give a special mention to jealous!Bakugou. No cos srsly, implying you're not friends with Deku as if you're not dying to hold his hand then getting irritated over Todoroki claiming the "friend" card 😩 Just, Bakugou, don't @ me ☺️💢

– The angst had reached full force it seems ಥ‿ಥ The line was cut but it actually says "Not friends, just childhood friends" 😭😭 and I am telling you Im'ma throw my brand new book when Bakugou explicitly acknowledges Midoriya as his boyfriend. Because before they were rivals, Bakugou and Midoriya were first friends. And I'm not saying that they aren't one now because we as readers, can definitely see they care for each other. But the question is, do they already see the other as a friend and not just a mere rival? They don't cos they're boyfriends your honor

– Tbh, It still haven't sinked in that this is kind of canon 🤧 This is such a cliched romantic scene like wtf?? So what's next? The full moon is illuminating half of Bakugou's face, red eyes glowing and face soft from the natural white luminescence or something sappy like that?? 😩😩 I love it

– Izuku in this LN chapter whenever he talks about Bkg: ✨ THEIR RELATIONSHIP ✨

– I know, I get it. You don't have to shove it my face every single time Deku 😌 and pls, why are you still flirting at the middle of the night?? Or was it pining that I see 🤔 i mean comparing each other to their kid parallels 😕 hmm a severe case of mutual pining indeed

– Yes yes, of course you're only looking for food stalls Mr. Bakugou "Tsundere" Katsuki, I completely don't believe that you're worried about the kids. No! of course not! Who says you want the kids to reconcile so they wouldn't experience the pain that you and a certain green had gone through?? Hahaha I mean It's not like they're your parallel what??hmmm no no, go on, look for takoyaki or smthn ☺️☺️

– Wait, did the last part say '"Bakugou grabbed Izuku's face and pushed it away..." Aksfksjdhdisjs what in the actual gay fanfic is this??!! Or wait, is this what Bkg usually do to Deku in the official art he's like, I love agressively gripping your head as I entangle my fingers on your soft curls but no homo💀

Since OP's translation isn't complete, I'm going to use Lau Ren's translation and yes I'm continuing this shit even though Tumblr mobile only lets me post 10 pics per post

– Bkdk domesticity with children pt. 95736 💚🧡 They love kids so much 😩 Yk I'd donate my kidney just to see this ANIMATED ✨ like this has so much fluff potential 🤧 Or at the very least a drama CD. I'd ascend 😭

– WHAT THE FUDGE ?!! I'M SCREAMING 😭 I SAY IT AGAIN 💞 SOULMATES✨ and pls, it has my favorite fic trope, Bakugou Katsuki is Bad at Feelings. Anyway, I need a minute to collect myself cos I can't move past the "With the said person himself nearby, Kacchan thought his fate had gone crazy" ( ≧Д≦) dammit Katsuki, why r u so gay. Izuku loves you, you emotionally constipated gremlin

I have reached my 10 picture limit so I'm just gonna copy paste some of the twts 💀 I hope I don't get in trouble lmao Xd

- Kacchan fixed his gaze to Deku who looked relieved. "He..."

- Somehow, Kacchan remembered the fight they had after All Might's retirement. It was the first time they were able to let out their conflicts sincerely. Although his fear towards Deku had decreased since then, there was still a feeling of disgust about Deku being a hero who save others residing in Kacchan.

- He couldn't understand it. But he knew, there will always a being whom he cannot understand

– Bkg rlly said 👀 on Deku while having angsty thoughts ಥ╭╮ಥ Looking back on this tho, I just can't help but be proud when I remember 285. Bakugou is loud but he is very rational in battles. He thinks of a plan on the spot meaning he's mind is on work 24/7.

– When he had his "My body just moved on its own" moment, Katsuki had understood Deku and his nature to "Save to Win." It'ss that Katsuki must not analyze it with his brain, but instead feel it with his heart 💚🧡 And this is the reason why I badly want to see him on the manga 😭 that was some MAJOR CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT I'm ahwjdhfjsh

– Takkun and Maachan's pinky swear deserves their own mention. They're so pure 😩✋

- He said he still hasn't done hatsumoude so Kacchan can go first, but Kacchan refused and wouldn't let Deku do hatsumoude before him.

- Kacchan tried to take a head start, but in the end, they ended up visiting and praying together.

– AND WE'RE BACK with the gays 😌 hsjdjajs they compete with every single thing it's honestly cute. Also YES THEY PRAYED TOGETHER and shoujo scenes with the main couple praying on the shrine but make it BKDK flashed before my eyes 😖✨

- After finishing their prayers, Deku looked at Kacchan, "What did you wish for?" "Shut up."

- Even with Kacchan's sulking expression seen from the side, Deku felt that they had wished for the same thing.

– DEKU YOU'RE BEING TOO LOUD!! I just can't with these two 😩✋ Both of them are down so bad for each other and you can't tell me otherwise 💚✨🧡

- With those serious eyes, Deku knew they were aiming for the same thing. Win to save, save to win. To be the best heroes.

- Deku knew well that he and Kacchan are polar opposites. But even so, Deku couldn't imagine a world in which Kacchan doesn't exist.

– Deku just went 😍 on Kacchan and thought "I CAN'T IMAGINE LIFE WITHOUT YOU 🧡💚" (insert Imagine by Ben Platt)

– I can't even stress how much I love this line, y'all this is so misleading I-- this is too much 😭 Anyway, I believe this go both ways. Bakugou can't also see a world without Deku in it, and since Deku decided to be the self-sacrificing person he is, I'll just SCREAM IN CH. 304 ( ≧Д≦)

- Seeing the two praying side by side, he commented, "so you've become good friends now, huh."

- Both of them immediately opposed, and Kacchan threatened to explode Shoto's mouth for saying such a disgusting thing.

– Let's go Todoroki, best wingman 🤣 And flustered Bakugou makes a reappearance hdjsja Dammit half n' half I ain't flirting with Deku fvck you

And this is where it ends afshshaha anyway bkdk canon 💚🧡

#bakudeku #dekubaku #bkdk #dkbk #mha light novel #bnha light novel #decchan #bakudeku canon #no edit #typo be damned #austere posts

[soonhoonsol]

Hii im kinda confused about the mingyu thing and I wanted to talk it out with someone

Like from what I read he made sexual comments around op even though he knew it made them uncomfortable right? I think thats it at least im not sure

And obs thats not right and he shouldn't have done that when op was explicitly uncomfortable and I truly feel empathy towards her because I know how even things that others don't think r a big deal can deeply effect y and hurt u

At the same time, idk if this makes mingyu the devil u know ? Like it was obs wrong but I knew so many boys in middle school that though sex jokes were the funniest thing in the world but they weren't bad people once they grew older u know? But at the same time I don't wanna brush this off as boys will be boys cause thats done way too much

Idk, I guess I'm just talking it out but I feel bad for op cause it obs really effected her and she deserved better but at the same time I recognize that mingyu was also a kid at the time. Idk I guess

Please know I'm not trying to defend him or anything I just wanted to express this to someone someone

Feel free to ignore it if u don't wanna talk about it anymore

I hope ur having a good day 🌷

hey anon~

yeah i guess it’s a thing? people tend to make these sexual jokes when they’re young, especially when they’re going through puberty, but if it’s true that mingyu just made these comments around her and not to her directly, then i guess he’s just ignorant.

BUT if he knew about his comments making her uncomfortable and STILL continued to do it, then that pisses me off to the max. that’s just invalidating her feelings and purposely doing it to torment her. (THIS IS JUST MY OPINION. I AM NOT SAYING HE DID THIS.)

i really hope this isn’t the case. i pray the allegations are false. but obviously whatever happened gave op some kind of trauma and seeing mingyu as an idol probably triggered this trauma again, which is really bad so i hope she’s getting enough help. 

as someone who also gets uncomfortable around sexual jokes, i understand what she’s going through, and to be honest, from the translations i’ve seen, op just seems to be suffering from the trauma and just wanted to put it out there.

overall, there’s not much we can do while we wait for p|edis to release a statement so... again, let’s just hope for the best. i hope you’re having a good day too anon. we need to take a break from svt today.

#askchey #anonymous #long post

[x-exo]

Ahh never apologize for replying late! I understand, I'm just happy tumblr didn't eat my ask xD

Ndkandks all of wonho's new songs are just, ugh amazing. For me I think ain't about you is my fav. I find myself humming to it at random times of the day the most, the melody is simple and catchy (also his English has improved so much im proud of him) but them LOOKS for this era ??? He didn't come to play haha. Changkyun being the master of art as always. At first was a bitsad for now performances on music shows but then I remembered he uses uhh "colorful words" so maybe that's why cx nonetheless am proud of him, hands down my favorite mixtape that my favs put out

Welp, the mingyu situation has been fully cleared up (ibelieve you answered this before the final pledis statement?) Pledis cleared things up and mingyu did apologize in the statement (this of course may bring up if he was honest with his apology since it was through the company) and I want to say he was honest? Idk, maybe im naive with believing this but he was wanting to meet with everyone that made posts, he did admit he made jokes and simply went along with them so he is taking accountability. I think now, what is best is just try to like move forward from this. This is up to each fan so I totally respect and understand if you may feel a bit "meh" with getting back into supporting mingyu. It is VALID, any fan that says otherwise is a buttsock. If you need some time, that is ok! If you need a break from the fandom, that is also ok! Afterall, being a fan should be fun and be a happy space! So whatever you pick to do, I support ya! *hugs you* for me, im comfy with like reblogging stuff of him and such. Like im a bit upset still but im a bit more ok If that makes sense? What we are NOT going to do is send hate to OP because their feelings were valid as well

Chanyeol is off fighting indeed, It feels weird but im happy he is able to be away from the idol life (especially after his insta clear out, i got a bit worried there. Sadly the woozi pic didn't survive that clear out gjskdja) what I don't understand is how fans got mad for now group photo and I am like ??? Yeah it sucks to not see them sending off chanyeol but we are in a pandemic and also maybe chanyeol wanted it to be personal? Can kpop fans just chill? Baekhyun released his new album and its iconic, like always lol. May 6 is his date and It will be a shame for sure, but as you said, am happy they can take a break and such. I hope Baekhyun doesn't feel guilty because I'm not mad! (Laughing since exo likes to leave us with gifts before going lol) and minseok!obessesion is just flippen perfection. Like can we greenscreen him into the mv sm? He fits this concept soooo much!

But hoshi making a solo debut, HOLO HAS HAPPEN3D YALL! I cannot stop listening to it, the vocals, beat and dance is just everything to me (a bit sad its not more songs but I'm not complaining) I just was screaming the entire mv xD like it felt like I was being blessed by a God or something lol

Ok my phone is glitching as I'm typing this so maybe its time for me to go xD I pray this sends but until next time we chat!! I hope you are doing well and are safe! Continue being fabulous!

ain’t about you is soooo cute and funky!! but then the dance....😳 dhfsdiuhisuhis yeahhh i think changkyun said it in an interview somewhere that he kind of wanted to promote it on shows but his company told him that it was that or changing the “colorful words” to something more suitable so he declined...I’m glad tbh it makes the album more special imo also he achieved so many #1s and so many views on the mv!! he was so happy!

yeah, I’m glad the mingyu situation is cleared up and he apologised I was missing seventeen so much omg and the members’ messages on his bday the second pledis dropped the last statement...🤧 they love him so much. ALSO GOSE IS BACK!! I’m so happy omggg i missed my weekly dose of serotonin! I’m glad everything is slowly going back to normal. Yeah same i’m okay with it now too.!

have you listened to tomorrow??? omg it’s so so so good i love chanyeol’s voice so much it’s so soothing 😍 hope it was longer tho! yeah tbh fans always find something to complain about like we’re in a pandemic and the south korean rules don’t allow gatherings of lots of people how do you expect them to all get together for a pic and then post it like ????? but anyways I’m glad he got his family with him to say goodbye! also...

EXO IS BACK EXO IS BACK EXO IS BAAAAACKKKKKKKK

I CAN’T BELIEVE MY EYES I REALLY CAN’T omg they’re really coming back with a whole album and a power continuation mv!!!!! also the song sounds like power 2.0 so it’s already soty!!!!! I’M SO EXCITED!!!!

I hope hoshi releases more songs bc i love his style and everything he does for that matter uidhgiufisdfh also MINGHAO SOLO!!!AAAAH so many things happening omgggg

#ask #I'M HAPPYYYYY

[ae-diaries]

My Life Testimony

Warning: Long post ahead

The content of this blog has me holding a secret I've kept hidden for a long time. I'm a bit hesitant to share my personal story because others (who knew me already) may be shocked or turned off 😅, but hopefully, the thoughts would bless someone and help you face your weaknesses and rise above them. This is a celebration of the greatest miracle I received from God. I never thought that miracle was real, until circumstances proved that it is possible. 

Foremost in my mind is when I was a high school kid. My life was symbolized by the microphone; I’d been exposed to sing in front of a crowd, be it in school or amateur singing contests. It's not to boast but it felt like I was a singing sensation back then, others dubbed me as 'songbird', 'sweet nightingale' to name a few 🤣. But when no one's looking, I felt, for lack of a better description, just off. This was caused by a certain physical condition that tear down my self-image. 

It all began when my mother noticed that I had an uneven shoulders when I was 13 years old. Later on, I was diagnosed with scoliosis measuring a 20-degree curve, and so my doctor from PGH gave me various stretching exercises and required me to wear a brace to prevent the curve from worsening or else surgery awaits me.

I freaked out inside. At the back of my mind, I wondered, “Why me?”. From then on, a hidden scar symbolizes my 'private' life. People might not notice it, but really I was riddled with inferiority complex and lack of self-worth. Nakakaiyak isipin, imagine ako lang bukod tanging estudyante sa private skul na may ganitong klaseng kundisyon. How I pitied myself. Parang ayoko nang lumabas. Hiyang hiya ako. 

I usually cried and pahirapan pa every time my mother would be putting the brace into my body, kabilinbilinan niya wag ko daw aalisin para daw mapabilis paggaling ko, but there was this one time, while I was on my way to school, naisipan kong dumaan muna sa haus ng classmate ko para lang ipatago yung brace ko. And it happened many times. Ang bigat nyang dalhin, di lang sa katawan kundi pati narin sa kalooban. Later on, they found out what I was doing, until wala na silang nagawa sa tigas ng ulo ko. Fortunately, my classmates did not bully me in school; however, I was still very conscious and afraid that my crush would see me like a bionic kid. To this day, I have never told my parents about this reason. You know as a teenager, I was overly sensitive by the opinion of others. And that's all that matters to me. I didn't think of the consequences of this action. 

Fast forward to 2012, sabi nila end of the world na this year (according to Mayan calendar), feeling ko katapusan ko nadin when I went back to the doctor and learned that the deformity progressed to over 50 degrees. Reality finally hit me! A major surgery was needed to correct my S-curved spine. Why I didn't just wear that darn thing? I must admit nagpabaya ako as I was trying to live like a normal kid. At that time, I was already employed in my first job so I filed for a two-month leave. Luckily, my very understanding boss approved it. I also had an amazing orthopedic surgeon, Dr. Teodoro Castro, who explained to me the procedure (though it was as clear as mud to me). He was very reassuring, so I didn't get scared. 

And when he asked, "Kelan mo gusto magpa-opera?," Without a second thought, I replied, "Kahit po bukas na doc!". My thoughts were, "If not now, when pa?"( I felt like I was running out of time.) His eyes bulged upon hearing my immediate response! And so he set the schedule to May 16, 1 p.m (which I spent at Sta. Teresita General Hospital in Quezon City). 

It was exciting, really, though it had 'Final Destination' feels. Andaming 'what ifs', what if di ako maka-survive? Bigla kong naisip talagang 'life is short' at ang dami ko pa palang di nagagawa sa mundong ibabaw such as makapag-serve kay God through joining a spiritual ministry, to travel for a cause, makapag-abroad, makakanta sa tv, makita si Regine & Sarah, magamit license ko to teach students, maigala ang magulang ko, and to have my own family. Sana magawa ko pa ang mga ito after post-op. 

More so, I felt my family's collective fear; I could actually hear the loud beating of my parents' chest when they signed the waiver 🤣. My father had worries that my voice might deteriorate after the operation. Laying in my bed and knowing that I may be that close to dying, I delivered my prayer of surrender to God and remained fearless. The comforting lyrics of 'You made me Stronger' by Kelly Clarkson became my fight song while in the hospital.

Waking up after the operation was the highlight. Being groggy from the anesthesia, I opened my eyes, feeling like it's just a continuation of my short sleep. I saw the nurses and my family - patiently waiting for me to wake up for almost 6 hours na daw. The first thing I asked was, "Tapos na?" (many times). I felt a huge sigh of relief when they uttered the words that struck me to the core, "Oo, tapos na." S*** I couldn't believe my ears; I was flying with joy! For years I have prayed for this miracle. I wanted to shout and do any dance challenge, 🤣 but how could I do that? They were preventing me from talking yet or make any movements because a mask was surrounding my nose and a lot of apparatuses were attached to my body. Later on, I learned that my younger brother cried after seeing me survived the operation. May kadramahan din pala si brother na lagi kong kabangayan 😂. While the success of my operation wouldn't be possible if it weren't for the assistance provided by my father's company, DMCI Corp. That's why I'll always be indebted to their big boss, VAC (May his soul rest in peace).

My healing lasted for almost nine months. I never suffered from complications, just pure torture and regrets na sana di nalang ako nagpa-opera (huhu). This is no exaggeration but dinaig ko pa talaga ang na-cesarean. On the first month after my operation, I became disabled and reached levels of pain I thought never existed in human experience: It was difficult to breath; I could not stand and walk on my own; I became excessively skinny because of drug intake - this was a legal drug prescribed by my doctor which can remove the pain only for 4-6 hrs. It felt so pathetic and frustrating to see myself in front of the mirror. No matter how much I tried to be positive, my insecurities gripped me down again and again to the point of questioning God: "Is there a hope for me?", 

"How come others could breathe and walk so well? During these times, inggit na inggit ako sa mga taong nakakalakad at nakakahinga ng maluwag. Feeling ko life is so unfair. Somewhere deep inside, I believed I was ugly, that He really didn't like me and it was His punishment for all the sins I did in the past. As I poured out my grief before God, a question popped in my head: “Mira, give me reasons why you should remain grateful?.”

“Seriously, how can I be grateful in times like this?.”

But in those agonizing moments, a light of hope from my parents’ eyes illuminates my darkness. 

In all the times that I cried and complained, I never saw them get too tired to feed me or serve me even if it would make them uncomfortable to make me comfortable. I couldn't imagine how they felt when I looked down on myself. Aside from my parents, my siblings, concerned relatives and genuine friends also never left my side. It's as if they became my extra pair of legs when mine refuse to walk. And my heart is full of gratitude today because they have loved me during the times that I didn't love myself. 

I'm living a normal life now as if nothing happened but others observed that except for my angelic voice 🤣, I tend to become forgetful and a little bit of deaf (Yes to this level) - this was probably caused by my extra dose of antibiotics intake 🤣. They noticed that I walk with lightning speed, as if may hinahabol daw ako lagi - maybe subconsciously, this has something to do with my life goals. Yes, I do get tired easier that's why there are some things that I must not do such as lifting heavy objects, sport activities (except for swimming), washing a mountain of clothes 🤣, bawal ma-stress and ma-exposed sa extreme cold places 😅.

As they say, true wisdom is learning from your shortcomings. For everything that I'd been through, I realized that there's a lesson hidden underneath the pain and it was God's way for me to:

(1) strengthen my faith - It was through this difficult times that I also underwent a 'spiritual surgery/enlightenment'. It has helped me find my stride in God and pray like I have never prayed before (for I know nakalimot ako). I didn't know all His plans but surely He was turning my brokenness into greatness. 

(2) love myself, invest in my relationships and create good memories - The whole discernment gave me the courage to keep progressing. I began to accept my imperfections, pick up my self-esteem, and do the things I haven't done before: Much is to be done but so far, I already saw Miss Regine and Sarah in person, traveled to different places, got to teach students in schools, treat my parents - brought  them to concerts and resto; spent midnight snacks and watched movies with my siblings; hang-out with friends; reunited with a long lost friend; restored a broken relationship, and tried to forgive someone;

(3) appreciate the fine details of life - More and more, my wishes become simpler. I realized there is more to life than any material thing could give, and that is getting enough oxygen and optimal healing to every organ in my body. Sobra kong na-appreciate ang buhay ko, especially the air I breathe, and the legs that carry me everywhere.

Eto lang sapat na 'to be happy'. Why did I fail to notice this before? And that's also what I want to ask you, when was the last time you were thankful for the air around you? True to what they say, the best things in life are free, but the problem is we're not contented with what we have and complicate rules to experiencing happiness: “I will be happy only if I’ll be able to upgrade my phone, buy a latest collection of chanel bag, wear a new pair of sketchers shoes..” And I'm so guilty of it because I once was a shoppaholic before that I forgot to remember how 'enough' I truly have.   

As I look back, hagulhol nako sa iyak - there were tears in my eyes, but they were no longer tears of pain but tears of gratitude - thinking how would I survive without the amazing people in my life.

I believe that God wants me to write this article so that I could speak for Him and claim that today, I can go out without any worries because I'm no longer ashamed of the scar life has left me with. It's a blessing in disguise; a sign that I conquered pain and fear. Wala na sigurong pagsubok na di ko kakayanin dahil kinaya ko na yung 'pinakamahirap' because truly, life is about not giving up and trying to fix yourself up after every fall. 

I cannot make the scar disappear but by looking at it, I see a testimony of survival, inner strength and God's miracles. Jesus never said it wouldn't be easy, but He said it would be worth it!  - Matt. 7:13

#secondlife #lifetestimony #embracingmyscar

[yourtmblrgirlfriend]

oh shut the fuck up thot. you watch a KID movie about to boys spending time together and you immediately think people are going to want the boys to fuck??? get cactus fucked you fuckin homophobe. stop assuming everyone on here is pedophilic. makes victims of it like me sick of people like you. you are def a bastard child.

Yikes. I understand that my comment under a post on seeing queer subtext on the Luca movie prompts such a strong response from you. I also want to acknowledge your courage on posting this w/o being anonymous. I see value and confidence in that and I respect that. I hope you're feeling better now that you let off some of your very valid feelings to me. I can see that you're upset. Also I live in tropical part of Asia, so it's hard to find cactus here haha.

Now onto the serious part:

I remember asking why mostly Western people see queer subtext Luca, a movie about children's friendship. The original op breaks down why it's problematic, and I agree. Unfortunately, I can't find the post nor my comment. So I'm paraphrasing here. I also note that in Asia, deep friendships are pretty common, all the way until adulthood and then I ask, do people in the West want to fuck each other by 12 or 13? Correct me if I'm wrong. But from this ask, I see that you think I am insinuating that queer people are all about sex, and contribute to a stigma of being queer = being pervert / pedophile. Again, correct me if I misunderstand you. Now, I didn't really aim the question at people who ships two characters on Luca, I just meant in general. Do people from the West want to fuck each other at the tender age of 12/13? And is that why they could see it on Luca? I don't mean to cast judgement, but it is a genuine question. Where I'm from, people don't really get frisky until 15, and in response there is no shipping AT ALL on cartoons with character aged 12-13. But to be fair, I might be overgeneralizing.

I would also like to add that I do not think I am a homophobe. My ethnic group do recognize and celebrate attraction and intimate relationship that do not fit heterosexual lens. In fact, rigid heterosexuality is imported when we were colonized by Europe (this also influenced my original comment). I'd like to think that my background would protect me from being a homophobe, but I take this as a constructive criticism and I'd def do some self-reflection. After all, we shouldn't stop learning and should always continue to check our own bias, so I take your ask as a quest for self reflection. And I humbly take it as so. Hope this clears up, and I do wish you feel better and good. If not, feel free to block me etc etc. Have a good day :)

Edit; somehow I missed the part where you said you were a victim of pedophilia. I am sending you my deepest condolences and empathy. Nobody deserves that and I hope you have a support group that loves, appreciate, and support you. I am keeping you in my prayer (it's an ethnic tradition to pray, i hope you're not offended if you're not religious)

#myask #your tumblr girlfiend

[itsmeashe143-blog]

INFOGRAPHICS, ABSTRACT/PICKTOCHART,SCRIPT IN CREATIVE WRITING

Script:

Extra Judicial Killing

It was a sunny day ... And the world is totally wonderful time for Family, and friends.

There was a Family named "Boone" the Boone family is a Blessed family among all , because they have their 3 meals a day and they can buy whatever they want ... But this girl named Alisha her lifestyle is introvert with her family, Alisha doesn't want to buy anythings , she spend time on books, and playing logical things. Alisha has a good personality unlike her mother "Celyn" she always keep on buying unimportant things just to please herself, Celyn is 43 year old Woman with a great heart for Her Husband "Fred" she can do anything just for this man. While on the other hand Alisha grew up with Fred, she is more closer to her Father than with Her Mother. Alisha is studying at Australia University, wherein Her father work as chief officer in Australia. Alisha grew up reading books that's why she had this name "Wizard" in their class!. Alisha has a friend namely "Yana", Yana is a childhood friend of Alisha.

(First day of Class - Grade 12 Student of Australia University)

Alisha: Yohoooo! Hey Yana, yohooooo? Yaaaaaana!

(Yana look back and He saw her Bestfriend)

Yana: Alishaaaaa, ohhh Alisha.. Howwww I miss you so much!

Did you just saw my pictures in Instagram & Facebook?

Alisha: Oh, Yana .. you already know me in summer time

Yana: oh well, well, books again? What's new .... Hmm

Alisha: Yes of course Yana you just got the right answer again, (chuckles laugh of Alisha)

Yana: oh great like what I'd said what's new about your summer...

From year 2003 until now you still reading books ...

Alisha: hmmm? There's nothing wrong?

Yana: Maybe? But for me, yes.. hmmmmm can you just spend time out of it?, I mean you know... Facebook, Bar or riding in?

Alisha: oww, no I love books, like... The story of Beowolf, Romio and Juliet the sonnets of William Shakespeare, the stories of O Henry... (fun Face of Alisha)

Yana: ohhh come on..Alisha Kindly stop that... It's been many times that you told with Me (Angry face of Yana)

Alisha: Oh come on I'd just love reading...

(Alisha saw something)

Alisha: oh my Gosh, Yana...look at this boy....

Yana: Hahaha, so what's with Him ?

(Chuckles Alisha)

Alisha: it's Leroy , who just red 100 books at the age of 18.

Yana: so what you think He is cooler than mine huh? (Boasful face of Yana)

Alisha: If I said yes? Hahaha

Yana: Yucks, Alisha... You so pathetic!

Alisha: No oh , oh oh! (Wiggling Head of Alisha)

It's just that you don't value your study Ma'am Yana

Yana: oh Great!... Here we go again...

Alisha: Oh gash, that's the problem with you Yana, you don't want to hear the Opinion of other.

Yana: Hmmm ( naughty face of Yana)

Alisha: Come, let's just go.. perhaps it's already time...

(The Bell Rings*)

Yana and Alisha went to their class... and the whole day Hour of studying passed and it is time to go Home...

Alisha and Her father always went home together... When it's 4:50 pm her father will be with Her to go home

(At the car)

Father: How's your first day of Class dear?

Alisha: it was fine Dad, and guess what Yana still don't understand the right term for finding X (chuckles)

Father: op op opss What did say with that kind of words Alisha?

Alisha: alright... Alright... (Alisha and father said)

"Do not judge other , if you don't want to judge".

Father: Great!

Alisha: ohh whatever daddy...

(The father continue to drive, and they arrived at 5:33 pm)

Father: Get all your things Alisha, and get wash and change your clothes,

So that your mother will not get angry.

Alisha: Oh great, (lazy Body of Alisha) .. yes Father

(While Alisha is busy with her preparation for dinner, at the door her parents are arguing)

Celyn The Mother: Fred ... Please give me money for a brand new car...

Fred: Oh come on dear, you don't already know how to drives that thing...

Celyn: please Fred, I can study it ... Perhaps I am just 43 .. I can still study how to drive.

Fred: Oh dear, oh dear... We have a lot of expense for this month ... Remember? This house is just new last February... And we still didn't recover all the money we spent.

Celyn: Hmmmm (Sad face) Your just saying that because you don't want to buy

Fred: If I am just a Ginny I would grant that wish, because your my master...

Celyn: Still don't convince (Boasful Face)

Fred: oh Come on Celyn your not a child to carry on... I hope you understand our situation.

(Suddenly Alisha went out of her Room)

Alisha: Mom? Dad? What's that again? Are you fighting again?

Fred & Celyn: No! Dear.

Alisha: Hmmmm ? (Curious Face)

Fred: Come down here Baby, let's eat...

Alisha: Yes Daddy, Coming!

(While Alisha is going down at the fence the mother noticed Alisha)

Celyn: Fred ... Kindly said to Alisha fixed up always Herself! ( Annoyed Face)

Fred: I already told it to her Dear.

Celyn: Hmmmf (angry face) and she still didn't get it!

Fred: Let's just eat ... Alisha Lead the prayer...

(While they are praying for their meal)

Alisha: Father God thank you for this food, blessed this Lord .. for us to gain strength, and good health .. thank you for this Blessing, In Jesus Name I prayed Amen.

Let's eat (Excited face)

Celyn: What a loud voice Alisha, minimize it.

Fred: (smiled with His daughter)

Alisha: Yes Mom (disappointed face)

(After eating Dinner Alisha went up to Her room, as Alisha sat's on her chair... She is looking at the window, while the vehicles are passing by... And while She is looking, she saw "Rosa" the vendor who is very kind with Her.)

Rosa: Mushed Potatoes... Hey dear Do you want this?

Alisha: Wow, Aling Rosa that is so delicious! Mmmmmmm (Craving Face)

Rosa: Here you go...

(She throw up the mushed Potatoes with Alisha)

Alisha: Wen will I ? Pay this Along Rosa?

Rosa: It's my gift for you (shouting)

Alisha: (Laugh louds) Hahahaha is it true Aling Rosa?

Rosa: Yes dear, it's all yours...

Alisha: (Shouting) thank you Aling Rosa! (Happy face)

(Her Mother Herd Alisha*)

(**Tok, Tak, Tok, Tak,... While stepping up ....

After it The mother Knocked the door)

**Tok tok tok tok

Mother: Alisha? Alisha! Open the door, what's that noise?

(Alisha is starting to panic and she kept the Mushed Potatoes at her Drawer,

And opened the door **eeeeengk)

Alisha: (smiling face with Her mother) It's nothing Mom

Mother: No... I have here something... Why ? Does it has moist here?

Alisha: It's nothing Mom, I'd just conducting a research theory.

Mother: Hmmmm ( naughty face)

(The mother went out Her room)

Alisha: Huuuuuhoooo (deep breath & out of Alisha and Getting out the Mushed Potatoes in her Drawer)

(Alisha talk's with Herself*)

Alisha: Hmmm, Aling Rosa Deserves to have a gift too, I think this Satchel is good for Her! (smiling Face)

(* Alisha takes rest on her Bed before she sleep she is Praying)

Alisha's Prayer: Lord, our Almighty God.. thank you for your generosity, thank you for your Genius Heart with Me. Lord Bless all my family and relatives, and even our mades, and driver, and Aling Rosa.. I hope she will sell all those mushed Potatoes, and Lord Please Guide My Friend Yana Help Her to know The Good part of Life, please Help her to be good person. Thank you Lord for everything ... This all I'd Pray in Jesus name , Amen.

(Alisha Slept)

(It Tuesday Morning Second day of the Class, and Alisha Prepared herself for herself and went in the school, and the Whole day Passed by... And Her Daily routine still exist of course.. Alisha remain kind and Faithful, as the time passes by... Alisha became one of the most awarded student in their school, she became a part of the Journalism, and paper writings in their school witch pushed back Her to be Famous in their school, but Alisha doesn't want to be like that: Famous, Admiring, and amazing, because for Her "A true person seek for good souls and help them to be renewed, specially with their lifestyle study. Alisha is a goal digger she want to help other people to grow up their self confidence, and to live with happiness as well. Alisha is not a ordinary persin, maybe a extra ordinary not with powers but with self respect and humble heart for other people.)

One day Alisha had Encounter a poor peoples, who are striving to live andto seek what to eat, and Alisha's heart was so Touched, and reflect...

Alisha: Poor family, poor living, and poor of anything.. how can this people live?

They buy junk for money, they drink water not that clean, they strive for meals, and they can't just washed 3 times or anytime ... And me? I'm lucky...

(Alisha was very sad at this moment because she can't see growth not improvements...)

(Alisha continue Her Journey, until one-day.... At Her School...)

(*While Alisha is walking..)

Nedry Boy Leroy: Hey you!

Alisha: huh? Yes Mr. , Why?

Nerdy Boy Leroy: I feel something bad for you

Alisha: What it is? Mr.?

Nerdy Boy Leroy: Hmmm.... (walks away from Alisha)

Alisha: (shouts so loud) Hey! Me.? What it is?...

(Nerdy Boy Leroy contiues walking away to Alisha...)

Alisha in Her Mind said : "What's with that Boy?, is He serious?... hmmm?" (while wondering)

(Alisha come in in Her Classroom, while she is walking... Her classmate look at her so serious...so Alisha started to Wonder of she did something wrong...)

(Alisha Sat down)

Alisha: Hey, Yana.. do you know what's going on? , Why does everyone looks at me so bad?

(Yana ignored Alisha)

Alisha: Yana?, Please answer me (Teary Eye)

Yana: I don't know Alisha! (Angry Face)

(Alisha went out their classroom and crying, she went out the gate... And run away...

Alisha has a secret place, where she can hang-on in Sadness time, Alisha went to that place and sat.. Alisha was so very disappointed of what she saw, and feel with her friend & Classmates..)

Alisha talk's with Herself: "Did I just did something bad?, Did I? ... Did I? (while her eyes starts to cry)

(Alisha stays in that place till 7:00 pm, and her Father starts to find her...

Her father was inside their house contacting Alisha in his cellphone: )

(Fred dials his cellphone: * The number you dialled is busy at the moment ... Please try call later..)

Fred: Oh God Help Me to find my Daughter...

(Alisha while walking , She covered up her face for Her not to trace... Because she know How delicate if the people will know that she is : Alisha the son of the Chief in Australia... Because in this time ... Extra Judicial Killing is rampant... That's why Alisha is very careful with Herself)

Alisha: It's getting cold, and dark... I wonder what? .. what will My Dad's reaction?

(Alisha continued to walk... And suddenly ... A man shots Him a gun...)

(gun Sound : bang...!)

(Alisha shoot and fell down at Her Head...and Alisha fell down, and the Killer start to run!)

(The people start to panick...)

People: What happen?, What happen?

People2: Oh dear ....

People3: Call a ambulance!

(Dialing.... Tut, Tut, tut,..** cellphone ringing...)

People2 in Call: Hello, please come here at St. Joseph Street 3454 Road! Urgent Please!

(3 minutes later... The ambulance came...the Ambulance get Alisha and ride inside it... And went Her in the Hospital)

(**Inside of the ambulance Alisha said:)

Alisha: ... Let the book show your way... ( Hovering Between Life And Death)

(Alisha went in the Hospital by the rescuers)

(*** inside the Hospital... The nurses put oxygen, and many things for to help Alisha survive..)

Doctor: She's still breathing...

(Alisha still fights for her life....Her father came to the Hospital, and cried)

(Fred run so fast coming inside the room of Alisha... And Cried)

Fred: Alishaaaaaaaa (Teary Eye of Him) What happen, (While Crying) Alishaaa my dear, Oh Alisha...

(And her Mother just got arrived too)

Celyn: Oh My! Daughter (Teary Eye and Starts to cry)

Fred: Alishaaaaaaaaaa (too much cry)

(And the detector of heart starts too ring : toot, toot, toot, toot..

And -------------------------- toooooooooooooooooooooot)

(Alisha died @8:59 pm)

(Her father Cry too Loud and her mother cried too!)

Fred & Celyn : Alishaaaaaaaaaa, our dear nearest daughter....

Fred: Help us Lord, Please take back the life of my daughter!

Lord please... Lord! (A broken heart told of Him)

Fred: Oh my dear Daughter Alishaaaaaaaaaaaaa!! (Saddest face while crying)

(The media starts to state this incidence... And Reported it in whole Australia)

(It was morning, while Chief Fred Starts to Identify the incidence. For Fred losing a one and only child is deeper than his life!, so Fred seeks justice for Alisha.)

(Fred while talking with His team)

Fred: Okay Team! - let's seek for justice, through investigation!

Policemen: Sir Yes Sir!

(While they are seeking for evidence, they have noticed ...)

Police 1: Sir I have found a book!

(Chief Fred take a look with it)

Fred: It's the book of my daughter! (Teary Eye)

Police 2: Sir I have seen a bullet here, 5 meters away from the crime scene!

Fred: If this is 5 meters aways from my daughter ? Would it be ... Killing intentionally? With what reason? / Why? My daughter is a very good and kind daughter! (Fred cried)

(The Chief and policemen staff still seek for it)

(After 3 days of investigation)

(Fred went to hospital to seek for information)

Nurse: Sir when we are inside the Ambulance Alisha told us "Let the book show your way".

Fred: What? , Why you haven't told me this information before... (Angry face of Fred)

(Fred ride in the car so fastly and came inside the room of Alisha)