sam carpenter x hurt!reader
summary: this is set right after tara and chad are attacked, you and sam having rushed to their aid to alert them that you had all walked into a trap. the main focus for this though is centred around when they run backstage and enter that little shortcut tunnel 😁
format: blurb? hcs? idrk tbh 😭
warning: mentions of stabbing, blood,
not proof read! lmk if i missed any warnings!
✧ ‧˚₊ ❆ ‧ ₊ ⊹˚✧ ‧˚₊ ❆ ‧ ₊ ⊹˚✧ ‧˚₊ ❆ ‧ ₊ ⊹˚✧ ‧˚₊ ❆ ‧ ₊ ⊹˚ ✧ ‧
the only way i can see this happening is if she’s distracted 🤷♀️ we all know how protective sam can be so there is no way she would leave your side long enough to be injured unless she had a pretty good reason to not be watching over you
there’s only one thing that could distract her from you, and that’s tara. the only other person she loves as deeply as she loves you
she had rushed to get you so fast that before she could even check if you were okay you had both already made your way to where tara and chad were, her focus then shifting to her younger sister to ensure she wouldn’t get hurt again
you have no idea how much sam regrets running behind tara and leaving you to be the last in line, but right now there was nothing she could do about it
imagine how worried sam is because she’s running ahead of you and can’t see you 😕 she’s for sure shouting back at you to make sure you’re okay
“come on you gotta keep up!!” “baby you good!?” things like that
and even though you tried your best to keep up, it still wasn’t enough
as you enter the tunnel you trip slightly, giving ghostface enough time to catch up to you. they grab you by the collar of your shirt from behind, dragging you backwards as they simultaneously shove their blade into your lower back.
the sound of your scream echoing throughout the narrow tunnel makes sam’s blood run cold
ghostface drops you to the floor, giving you enough time to crawl just about far enough to dodge the camera that chad hurls in your direction
chad does manage to pull you up in time for you to both escape the tight space before your attacker becomes stable again (my man coming in clutch 💪)
you practically fall into sam’s arms. just picturing her worried puppy dog expression is making me tear up ngl
she so wishes she had enough time to whisk you away to safety, there’s nothing she wants more than to just take you away from the mess she caused.
(^^ik she didn’t cause it but she thinks she did ☹️)
as ghostface once again catches up to you all, chad knocks the popcorn dispenser off the side, knocking your pursuer down once again. sam gently moves you to lean against a nearby wall, praying to god you can hold yourself up.
you can’t 😝
as you slide down the wall sam crouches down in front of you, taking your face into her hands as tears spill from her perturbed eyes. a streak of deep red smeared blood is left behind on the wall, following your decent to the floor.
sam is so scared :(
upon noticing that chad and tara need help, she presses a soft kiss to your sweat glazed forehead. she whispers, “i’ll come back for you, just stay awake. i love you.” and at that she’s gone, moving to help hold down your foe to give chad the opportunity to hopefully put them down for good.
however, your efforts to stay awake are to no avail; mumbling a barely audible “i love you” before your whole world goes black.
a/n: it’s 5am so i’ll write pt2 and post it tomorrow 😭🙏
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this is kind of silly maybe, but do you have any recommendations for wedding planning/inspiration resources that aren’t super steeped in heterosexual/christian culture lol
So when I first got engaged I was actually in a groupchat with 3-4 other lesbians who were all also engaged. We didn’t know each other super well but got to know each other as the months went on & I really benefited from that! People say that no one cares about wedding planning unless they’re also planning a wedding and it’s true 😂 If you’re on facebook, I’d suggest joining your city’s local wedding FB group and making a post asking for some LGBT pals for co-support! You might be surprised at the response you’ll get.
Other than that: I have a “no influencers” rule about wedding planning; as in no individual people who planned their own weddings and made it into content. anyone who’s made a career out of tiktoks or whatever about planning one day of their lives is probably not to be trusted. Instead I followed wedding vendors, lots of them, even if I didn’t plan on using them. It’s pretty easy to find LGBTQ friendly vendors like photographers, planners, venues etc, in different cities—and their ideas inspired me! I also dig the “dancing with her/dancing with them” pages, though I don’t follow that closely. Tbh I didn’t feel the impact of Christian culture that much when looking through wedding stuff and I think if you look in the right places it’s easy to avoid. Best of luck to you in planning!!!
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bendy, "ink demon", and trauma responses
I've recently got back into Bendy. (tbh this shit is never gonna be going away this has been my special interest for 7 years FDKJNDSJKFD) and I did some thinking on him again. It's crazy to me on how... dehumanized Bendy was. While, yes, he's not an actual human, but he's still, y'know a person. He has feelings, he's conscious. He just doesn't have a soul. Which brings me to this post. The Ink Demon has never been called by Bendy.
Which, you're all like "well, duh. That's his ink form. His other form is his toon form, just to tell which forms apart." I know that's possible the case. But I do wanna look into this attitude a bit more. When Bendy was first created, Joey literally called Bendy a THING, and for him to lock him away because he wasn't what he wanted. His literal crime was looking scary. So, Thomas Connor and Gent by the request of Joey, locked Bendy away for... God knows how long. Tbh, it's never clear on how Bendy ever acts, but Bendy was probably scared out of his mind.
Can you imagine you're finally made and some people are talking. You have no idea what's going on, but this Joey dude says that you're wrong. You came out wrong. You are a mistake. You're suppose to be loveable, silent, and small. But you're not that. You're tall, empowering, posing, and not even a real chance to prove you're not as scary as you look. You aren't even called by your name, nor the title you would gain via your infamy. You are a thing. You are not someone who has emotions or needs, a thing. You are a monster. Now, you're locked away, probably terrified, and calling for help but people around you are too scared of you to help or don't wanna face the wrath of this Joey Drew.
I think Alice said this best back in Chapter 4 of the original game. At the studio, you were in someone's pocket, or someone was in yours. The studio was a disaster pit. Even if not everything happened was "real" or w/e, Joey was still a dickhead to everyone around him. Bendy was no exception. I think Bendy probably learned the best way to survive the studio, and the harsh reality around him was to manipulate. Bendy is a pretty good manipulator, he can get into someone's head, mess with them, and still taunt them. No one is born or created evil. That's a learned method.
In extreme cases of trauma, many people are in survival mode and thinking about themselves to survive, and how they can get by. This is because their safety, wants, and needs weren't being met. Not to mention, Joey and Gent just threw Bendy into the cartoon world, probably to just lock him away forever. Joey locked Bendy up for God knows how long, and now he's in this like- cartoon world version of the studio. He goes from nothing to everything in one fell swoop. This just made Bendy retreat more into himself. It just made his coping mechanism of always having to be on top, always being in control, the one everyone needs to fear. Because, fuck it.
If he's so horrible, if he's so monstrous, if he's so terrible, than he'll just become it. Minus when Bendy meets Audrey in his toon form, Bendy doesn't have anyone. Bendy has never been shown any warmth, kindness, or love in his entire life. The only thing he does know is pain, suffering, coldness, been abandoned, and been made out to be a monster. Which brings me to this - no one has every called the Ink Demon by his real name.
Even when he's technically no longer being locked away, and ruling the cartoon studio, he's still been dehumanized. Or never seen as a fellow victim of the machine and Joey. Everyone has said to BEWARE the Ink Demon, look out for him, and watch your back. The one rule down there was always beware the Ink Demon. Hell, Bendy calls himself the Ink Demon. Bendy has just embraced the title of being seen as this almighty, opposing figure. People either blindly worshipped him or feared him. They never saw him as someone who was unjustly hurt. Unjustly locked away and abandoned. Unjustly painted as a monster because he didn't turn out the way Joey wanted him to be.
You know who has called Bendy by his name? Someone, for the first time, called him by his real name and not some title?
Audrey.
Audrey is the first person to show Bendy any kindness or warmth. While, yes, it was in his toon form. He actually gets treated like a person. Someone who has emotions, and even APOLOGIZED when she, on accident, hurt him. And Hell, dude accepts it! I really hope, going forward, as a way for Bendy to heal when he's in his Ink Demon form, Audrey shows him the same compassion and kindness in that form of his. But she also calls him by his name. Bendy. Not to mention...
The cycles are interesting to me. It could possibly just being a plot thing. But it could be seen as a continuing of generational trauma and toxicity, and Audrey is the one who stops it. Joey clearly has some shit going on. He hates not being in control and wants to be in control of how other people perceive him. So, he turns out destructive towards everyone. Which is... eerily similar to how Bendy treats his own trauma. Bendy and Joey were physically and emotionally destructive to the people around them. It's also kind of sad because Bendy thinks he's in control of the studio. Dude says it's his domain, when Joey was still in control all along.
Bendy is continuing that toxic cycle. Then Wilson comes along and projects his own trauma, and issues. While the cycle stopped, Wilson didn't make it any better, and probably made the cycle for everyone in the studio just worse. By Audrey having the book now, she's putting a stop to the generational trauma via helping out everyone still trapped and helping Bendy out. That's why I've been calling Ink Demon, Bendy.
Because that's his name, after all.
ADD ON-; I just wanna say that Bendy was HARDCORE self projecting on Audrey near the end. I also wanna touch on Bendy and suffering. Bendy was so miserable, and had nobody he just gave into his own suffering, and became the Ink Demon. If he has to suffer, he's going to make everyone else in the studio suffer. He only found any purpose was in harming others. Also, obvious disclaimer this doesn't justify what he does to the people he has hurt. It explains it, doesn't justify it.
It's just downright depressing that he thinks he had no purpose, his existence was a lie, thought of himself as a mistake, and monster. To be frank, I wouldn't be surprised if Joey called Bendy a monster or a mistake. He did call Bendy a THING after all. I really hope Bendy does get to heal and realize his purpose doesn't need to be him suffering and he can have SOME peace.
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BROTHERS
The river Weser ran between the Roman and Cheruscan forces. Arminius came to the bank and halted with his fellow chieftains:— "Had the Caesar come?" he inquired. On receiving the reply that he was in presence, he asked to be allowed to speak with his brother. That brother, Flavus by name, was serving in the army, a conspicuous figure both from his loyalty and from the loss of an eye through a wound received some few years before during Tiberius' term of command. Leave was granted, and Stertinius took him down to the river. Walking forward, he was greeted by Arminius; who, dismissing his own escort, demanded that the archers posted along our side of the stream should be also withdrawn. When these had retired, he asked his brother, whence the disfigurement of his face? On being told the place and battle, he inquired what reward he had received. Flavus mentioned his increased pay, the chain, the crown, and other military decorations; Arminius scoffed at the cheap rewards of servitude.
They now began to argue from their opposite points of view. Flavus insisted on "Roman greatness, the power of the Caesar; the heavy penalties for the vanquished; the mercy always waiting for him who submitted himself. Even Arminius' wife and child were not treated as enemies." His brother urged "the sacred call of their country; their ancestral liberty; the gods of their German hearths; and their mother, who prayed, with himself, that he would not choose the title of renegade and traitor to his kindred, to the kindred of his wife, to the whole of his race in fact, before that of their liberator." From this point they drifted, little by little, into recriminations; and not even the intervening river would have prevented a duel, had not Stertinius run up and laid a restraining hand on Flavus, who in the fullness of his anger was calling for his weapons and his horse. On the other side Arminius was visible, shouting threats and challenging to battle: for he kept interjecting much in Latin, as he had seen service in the Roman camp as a captain of native auxiliaries.
Tacitus Annals 2.10-11
there's a lot going on in there! Arminius switching to Latin is a detail that always makes me feel a deep kind of sadness, especially with how it's preceded by mention of their mother. I wonder what she thought of what became of her sons, on opposite sides of everything but still, inescapably, brothers. even when they want to kill each other. there sure are a lot of fucked up and unhappy brothers around. and Arminius asking about Flavus' injury............I also had a whole thing typed out about the horror of imperialism and colonization and the trauma of assimilation but I think this sets the tone better
Rome's Greatest Defeat: Massacre in the Teutoburg Forest, Adrian Murdoch
and also this, just for fun
(ibid)
this post is already a mile long, so lets add another mile to it: a little scene at the start of their conversation! tfw you go in for a hug and your younger brother who also ended up being taller starts roasting your hair style
bsky ⭐ pixiv ⭐ pillowfort ⭐ cohost ⭐ cara.app⭐ko-fi
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