#i hate picking up new books

[tleeaves]

The art is lovely and now I'm gonna ramble because that's what I do when I care about something.

For the love of women, please PLEASE can fan artists remember to add muscle to their Shadowhunter ladies? I'll commend Bowater for cleverly giving James that sculpted and lean look without making him a beefcake (nothing against beefcakes, I'd love to hug them), but Cordelia is once again suffering from Arms And Shoulders Too Slender It's Hard To Even Imagine Her Picking Up A Sword. There is some there, yes, but artists shouldn't be afraid of giving particularly Female Main Characters weight and toned muscle. Cordelia is supposed to be nearly the same height as James as far as I can remember, and she's curvy, and full, and she wields a sword like it's second nature to her. Please explain why she looks so tiny in James' lap.

Also I'm pretty sure marriage runes are supposed to go over the heart whenever possible (thinking about Will's parabatai rune being over his heart instead -- he didn't get Tessa to draw over the scar, did he??) and... either I'm looking at the picture wrong or James' rune is not over where his heart should be.

For the matter, where are their other runes and scars?? James' Voyance rune isn't even on his hand. And I'm pretty sure he's right handed. I could have that wrong though.

Another thing: no one can ever decide what Cordelia's hair looks like and it's the funniest thing to me. This is what happens when all you do is vaguely say the colour is like fire but also like rose petals but also a flowing river of those things but also is Red (probably for redhead, but then from there I never understand where the rose petal analogy comes from considering the typical rose is a deep bloody colour -- I do acknowledge the existence of those light orange varieties though which might more closely resemble red hair). In the end, I'm glad readers can infer what they want and imagine the characters how they like.

Anyone else think James looks like he's built like a tennis player? Oddly specific, maybe, but it was a thought I had. Mostly the arms and somewhat narrow body.

James' hair is nice, his eyes are an interesting take on gold in the shadows. Bowater managed to also make him look closely related to his father, so bravo for that.

In the end, the focus is obviously on the marriage runes and not other physical aspects outside of it being clear that this is James and Cordelia. Bowater's style is very beautiful and elegant. Love the way fabric and lighting is done too. I'll add also that it is possible to be a smaller person who is slender but still strong so I mean Cordelia's not necessarily done wrong, I just interpret her appearance differently. Obviously, they're both hot and they're both attractive and I have my qualms with the series, chronicles, and author -- the fandom I am so-so on, though I'm still here, aren't I? And I'm taking the time to ramble about my thoughts on a piece of fanart -- but this is good. Gorgeous, even. Both James and Cordelia are beautiful.

#side note: am I the only one who thought cc made a mistake trying to describe james as handsome in cordelia's eyes #as opposed to matthew being the beautiful one #when there has always been a deep and aching strange beauty to james?? #james herondale #cordelia carstairs #vaguely crediting charlie bowater though it isn't like you can't find a dozen more copies of this with the credit #also yes I mercilessly picked this apart because I am still trying to find avenues to express my dissatisfaction with tlh #I search for flaws what else can I say #I am aware of it but it's hard to turn those thoughts processes off #maybe I'll write a post at some point all about the authors I once Loved that I am now deeply critical of #a lot of people would hate me for it but eh #also we all know about the marvelisation of cinema #but is it time to talk about the marvelisation of book series/worlds? #or perhaps it has a better and more book-focused name? the jkr approach? rick riordan's marvel-esque flaw? the sjm plague? the clare affair? #we'll workshop it #maybe it's the curse of middleschool-YA series and the issue of aginh readers in fandoms #and I don't mean this as discriminatory against anyone older in fandom because there is not really a limit nor should there be #for most media #but the issue of when the readers grow up amd authors try to accomodate for that -- not necessarily by making their work more adult -- #but by making MORE because there is also an influx of new fans and they want to stay relevant while retaining the old #it's a whole thing though I'd need to sit down to properly organise my thoughts to talk about it

[givemewallywestorgivemedeath]

John Fox is such an interesting character because he and Wally are direct parallels to Eobard and Barry. Yet the fact that John never became a Reverse Flash, and instead carried on the Flash legacy, speaks to Wally’s compassionate and begrudgingly forgiving nature.

So first the parallels.

John Fox was born in the far off future where he grew up idolizing the Flash. The Flash was his hero, his savior. When Fox's city was being threatened Fox decided that only the Flash could save them and time travelled to get help from a Flash. John wasn't able to get help but he did acquire superspeed himself after time traveling. John donned the name ‘The Flash’ and created a Flash suit out of Flash suits he stole from the Flash museum. John Fox managed to save the future version of Central City and he got his first taste of being a hero.

Already the parallels to Eobard are obvious. The Flash obsession, the time travel, trying to be the Flash, ect. The only notable difference thus far is that Eobard had to invent crime to ‘fight’ when he was attempting to be the Flash and John had a legit crisis to combat. This legitimate need for a Flash combined with John’s willingness to step up would make him more of a Wally parallel than an Eobard parallel but unfortunately for him it didn’t last long. Due to future technology Fox became redundant. There was no need for a Flash and he was restricted to permanent guard duty at the Flash museum.

Taking away the need for a Flash made him desperate to go back in time and be a hero again. When an amnesic Wally West arrived in his century Fox saw his chance. He, following in Eobard’s footsteps, replaced Wally as the Flash. John went so far as to fall in love with Linda and strain her lightning rod connection with Wally, which trapped him in the speedforce. This was known information to John Fox. He was aware that Linda’s hope and love was Wally’s only chance at returning. What John did was akin to attempted murder. John wanted Wally's life. He lived in his house, donned his name and uniform, did his job and stole his girlfriend. He killed Wally for it. It’s really not hard to connect this behavior to Eobard who has tried to replace Barry multiple times in the past.

Fox is also not a great Flash. He’s skittish. Unsure and nervous. He’s playing the part of a hero rather than actually being one. Whereas Eobard was too aggressive as the Flash, John was too timid. Both, ultimately, were poor imitations of the originals.

This is where the similarities stop. While Barry reacted to Eobard with righteous fury, Wally reacted with anger, some sarcasm and then basically said ‘goddammit John you are helping me fix this mess or we are going to die trying’. When faced with a man who attempted to kill him and take over his life, Wally could only punch the man and be mildly snippy with him. Wally didn't want Fox to be an enemy. Wally saw potential in him. Wally saw the good man and hero Fox could be.

So Wally walked John through being a hero. He made Fox fix his mistakes, taught Fox how to save the day and by the end of it Wally ended up forgiving him. He gave John his stamp of approval, called him a Flash and sent him on his way.

This was a play by play on how to create a Reverse Flash. This was the recipe. John, by all means, should have been a villain. But Wally isn’t Barry. They are different people and they react in different ways. Wally is driven by the need to see the inherent good in people. He will always give people a second chance and, because of that, against all odds, Wally walked out of there with John Fox as a trusted friend and a Flash in his own right.

#It was like John had read Thawne's 'how to become a reverse flash' book and was doing the origin story word by word #then Wally walk in and was like 'pfft. old news.' and threw a flash book at his head #Wally was so fucking sarcastic and mad the entire time but goddamn did he redeem Fox and make a hero out of him #Wally: I fucking hate you #John: Im going to punch you so hard that you skip two decades #Wally: Im going to punch you so hard that you become a good person #John: .... what #Wally: You heard me! Pick up your fucking visor! we're going evil robot hunting you asshole #dc #dc comics #the flash #kid flash #wally west #john fox

[thewinchestah]

after 10+ years I finally finished Dexter.

And holy shit I knew there was no way we would get something remotely happy but my GOD i’m inconsolable.

This show means a lot to me and I never got around to finishing it bc I hate endings

but sweet Jesus Christ it was so sad, and so beautiful.

I’m unwell.

#dexter was always a family thing in my family #Dexter was the book i picked up in the airport to read in my first time travelling abroad. #i got new blood to watch but im like?? really sad. #Dexter #sofreu mais que jesus #plus i hate his fucking therapist #we should get therapy directly from Hannibal lecter and im not even kidding #dexter Morgan

[deepwoundsandfadedscars]

.

#while organizing a while ago I found a couple books from a series that my sister had recommended to me #and I realized I never read those last two books so I picked up my kindle and started rereading the first omnibus #it's been like 10 years since my sister recommended it to me but because of my first reading being because of her #i felt my eyes watering up like four times just in the first chapter #and it's nowhere near a sad chapter!! #but it was rough trying to get through #and now I feel like I have a taste of how difficult it is going to be reading the new Murderbot Diaries book next month #i hate this #kee speaks

[thedragonlover]

Every time someone says they don't support JKR but still love and purchase HP things, I break a table in half over my knee and also they owe me fifty bucks

#just the mere mention makes my blood boil like IMMEDIATELY #listen! i grew up with it too! it's not worth sticking with trust me #there are better books and better people to die on a hill for #and plenty of people that supporting her hurts actively as she's still alive and kicking and funding hate #with all the money you and others hand over in droves #pick up a new book to fall in love with i beg of you #dragon talks #dragon vents #fuck jkr

[wanderingandfound]

Headache headache headache. Bad bad bad.

#Ah cute people I matched with on Bumble. Farewell. It has been over 24 hours and I did not message you. #personal #learning to function #I went clothes shopping and now have some slightly better fitting jeans but am also done with absolutely everything and don't wanna talk. #I was utterly exhausted AND had the headache BEFORE I left the house and I hate clothes shopping so much. #I did pick up the new B&N exclusive Mark Oshiro & Rick Riordan Nico book and have started reading that. #Don't wanna talk to people. #Don't wanna inhabit this body. #It isn't even particularly hot yet but ouch.

[televinita]

oh noooo not an estate sale showing me six beautiful blonde oak lookin’ bookshelves to match my childhood and favorite one, i want all of them to be in my house, or at least the ones with thick and sturdy shelves (some of those look Thin and Weak).

But while that is not feasible I am very much looking at the short one in the first pic there, because it looks like it has about the same amount of shelf space as the one next to it, just with less wasted room above the books. What if... maybe...

[edit: apparently the bookshelves were not for sale. maybe that was for the best, because they were as good as they looked. I would like to note that they were all criminally crammed into a room the size of a walk-in closet, with approximately 15 square feet of floor space in the middle. In a sprawling 3-story 1900s house.]

#also i want to look at all the books on teh shelves and everything in the hosue really #saturday is day 2 which means a) deals! but also b) it ends at 3 so I gotta wake up early and hustle grrargh #(day 2 and final which is the real problem here. hate snap decisions) #estate sales #i wasn't really PLANNING to get a new bookshelf but I am terribly Aware that there is technically room in here if I shift things #edit 2: also i was v. tired from several nights of poor sleep so we didn't get there until 2.25 hours before close. house was picked over #the bookshelves were still full of books though #lots of high quality picture books and just good stuff in general even though I resisted all of them

[mephorash]

sometimes I feel low functioning

#buzgie ❁ #i moved and everything is new and theres so many new people and i was at a wedding yesterday #what am i supposed to pick up broken glass with???? #for reference they once moved my bed from one wall to the other in residential and it gave me a panic attack #no routine no anything everything is different hate hate hate!!! #i cant do anything im just trying not to have a toddler level screaming meltdown over basic adult responsibilities #this is pathetic i cant even do a basic task because i have autism. i hate being autistic i wish i could he normal #i am literally going to end up in a group home i cant even talk to a fucking cashier #i genuinely think im mid support or something like theres no way im 'high functioning' #im not a bit strange and wacky i cant get a retail job or go into uni or order food or buy groceries because my autism won't let me #i cant book an appointment because it gives me a panic attack #i hate being autistic this shit isnt quirky its a curse.

[anonofseasons]

I love to see criticism of Graham, because he's too compliant in his children's abuse as a parent. He's not a random passerby who can't legally do anything to interfere. He's not one of his other children. It's true that Vivian can overpower any of them with his magic, but... Graham's efforts are disgustingly weak. He could give his husband pause by wrapping his entire body around his kids and saying, "You have to get through me first!" Or even just herding the kids away to another room and blocking the door. Vivian would certainly start putting up one hell of a verbal argument, but he would never attack Graham to get to his kids. He's emotionally and verbally abusive to his husband, but he's never physically abused him. Viv's not going to take on a delicate human whose time is far more finite than his own. A simple injury could lead to much worse. Not just that, Graham's supposed to be his equal. He knows this, despite how he treats him. (He's his equal until he's wrong. Then Vivian is absolute in all things. Ugh.) Instead, Graham backs down. He agrees with quite a few of the punishments. There are a few times he manages to convince Viv to lessen the severity, but again... He doesn't do enough or downright normalizes what's happening. The kids still love Graham. Fuck, they love Vivian. That goes for Howie, even Shannon. Actually, okay, Sophronia loves Graham (cautiously) and hates Vivian. His favorite hates him. LOL. Even without the isolation, lots of kids love their parents despite what they do to them, but... When you're isolated as badly as the youngest three boys? They love Graham more because he's not as bad as Vivian, but what if there was an adult in their life that showed them that there is kindness better than Graham? Anyway, I love Graham being held accountable.

#I feel like rambling a lot about Seasons today #I was supposed to work with someone on a book cover for one of my novels today but plans got cancelled #so I guess I'm writing Seasons and maybe reading this new book I picked up yesterday? #feel free to send asks if you want to encourage my procrastination haha #I'm not usually the type of person to procrastinate unless I hate doing something but I'm physically unwell so I have no motivation :(

[fictional-worlds-are-exquisite]

the book im reading is so funny it’s like here’s a murder mystery and every 30-40 pages or so we will reveal another person who had motive to kill the guy because guess what! literally everyone hated the guy! he fuckin sucked! We are now on potential murderer number 10, but which one of the 10 did it? ;)

#I’m losing track of who’s sleeping with who #mf cheats so hard I need a diagram #everyone in this fucking neighbourhood is up to something I need several diagrams #I’ve been reading this book for like a week now #every day I pick up the book I find out this guy was a shite in a whole new way #I keep forgetting things I’m like ok he cheated he’s a shithead but why do we all hate him again #then I’m like ohhhh he literally committed horrific crimes I forgot about that #I doubt it’ll be the case but it’d be really funny if everyone did it

[nataliekabra]

the number of times ive come across a sapphic book with the perfect blurb and premise

"dark academia retelling of macbeth with a close knit group of morally grey disabled main characters who all happen to be gay set at a boarding school"

"found family of queer theatre kids put on a school production of les mis and the hopeless sapphic stage manager is convinced she's cursed by the theatre lords and tries desperately not to fall for the lead in the play"

"lesbian writer goes on a mission to track down her favourite lesbian author who made her feel seen as a queer teen in love with her best friend in the 50s and explore her identity and connection to said author over generations in a love letter to lesbian pulp fiction"

"bi girl goes on a trip to a youth group camp in mexico and explores her sexuality in an informative, sex-positive book for queer teens"

"oblivious awkward bi girl pen pals bond over punk music in the 70s"

"sapphic high school sweethearts explore a long distance relationship when they go to college, where the genderqueer protagonist finally finds their trans found family and feels seen"

and then i find out it's by robin talley:')

#anti robin talley #i just. try to avoid her now but it's so hard #why is she always so close to getting it right but then spins off centre #and even with her books that dont make me uncomfortable #like melody mcintyre or as i descended #theyre so boring they have the best premise ever and im so excited for them and i just cant #so i dont want to get my hopes up anymore #and thats not even getting started on the. weird ass eyebrow raising shit shes written #and that shes also written a historical book about a black girl falling in love with her racist bully like this is actually the premise #*they both need to get over their prjudices of each other* apparently i will never understand how that book is so popular #i hate this we need an author who writes these books (not the racist white saviourist one the others) who actually. does it well #it would literally mean everything to me the number of times ive picked up one of her books not seeing its by her #im so sure itll be a new fav and then. ugh #lesbian #sapphic #sapphic books #queer lit #its the way she feels so entitled to writing other peoples experiences and completely botches them up? among other things #robin talley #as i descended #the love curse of melody mcintyre #pulp #our own private universe #music from another world #wlw #wlw books #bisexual

[desert-dyke]

Everyone who relates to that “I used to read a book a day as a kid and now I barely read at all” consider: you need to build up your endurance again. 

#you're out of practice its the same as any other skill and you'll need to build up your reading speed again by doing it slowly #also your tastes might have completely changed from then so if youre picking up x genre bc you liked it as a kid and not vibing with it anym #try a new genre #also middle grade and ya books are a lot quicker readers than adult bc adult books have more nuance where MG and YA kinda spoonfeed u #which is fine I still read and love MG and YA but if you're going right to adult and thinking gdi why is this taking so long thats ok #also not every adult book is about divorce like that post about how adult fiction is only about hating your wife is like obvs from someone #who doesn't read or read a lot bc I've read like...zero divorce books lol like maybe you need to get out of the divorce book section #like believe it or not but adult fiction is as diverse in topic and themes as YA and MG

[whywoulditho]

vent

#i've been so confused and sad lately #i'm supposed to decide what i want to do with my life this week and the problem is that i already know what i want to do #but i cant do it. because i need to make money somehow. and universities really dont give a fuck about your hopes and dreams and passions #i'm really just a kid. i'm just 17 for gods sake #it makes me angry how i have to go through this bullshit and lay on the kitchen floor and cry my eyes out for hours #i argue with my parents and myself and it doesn't solve anything #'dream big' 'you can do anything' shut the fuck up. stop lying to kids #stop giving them hope dreams passions when you're just gonna crush them as soon as they become young adults #i'm so full of hate. anger. i wish i wasnt alive i wish i didn't have to go through this. this is the worst time of my life so far #i know i should pick myself up. i know i need to start recovering from this but i dont feel like i want to #it already afternoon and i havent eaten anything #i didn't make my bed. i didn't brush my teeth. i didn't take my ocd meds. #i didn't talk to my friends and i've just deleted my insta acc so i cant #i'm scared. i'm so scared of hating what i become. i'm so scared of being stuck with a life i hate just because i made the wrong decision #part of me wants to believe it wont be the end of my life even if i do make the wrong decision #part of me knows its bullshit and i'm just foolimg myself because i know i will regret this for the rest of my life #i hate money. i hate life. i hate that i have to make money to make my way in life #i dont want a house or a car or fancy things #but i cant even begin to imagine being too poor to afford a book i like or not being able to travel around and see new things #like... everything is money. i cant imagine having to stay in the citt i grew up in just because i cant afford to go #i cant imagine it. it makes me wanna die #i want to be realistic about this #but i hate that i have to give up on everything i worked for and hoped for and dreamed of FOR YEARS for realism's sake #i... really need to clear my mind and stop being so dramatic about this #i'm scared. i regret staying alive long enough to see this day honestly #i wish i had died before all of this has ever begun to be part of my concerns #i wish it wasnt so hard. i wish it wasn't so scary #i think i need a coffee and my meds #sorry for the vent #please dont bother trying to help

[astralartefact]

in a game that violently feeds you subtlety with a grapefruit spoon, yoko taro decided to assume that some people would know what crime and punishment was about and i just think that's funny.

"He dreamt that the whole world was condemned to a terrible new strange plague [...] All were to be destroyed except for a very few chosen. Some new sorts of microbes were attacking the bodies of men, but these microbes were endowed with intelligence and will. Men attacked by them became at once mad and furious. [...] Whole villages, whole towns and peoples went mad from the infection. All were excited and did not understand one another. Each thought that he alone had the truth and was wretched looking at the others, beat himself on the breast, wept, and wrung his hands. They did not know how to judge and could not agree what to consider evil and what good; they did not know whom to blame, whom to justify."

anyways, i think he read the book

#yorha dark apocalypse #suddenly the logic virus takes a crimey new turn for the punishment #im just kidding while that (actual and real) paragraph reads like a nier summary #it's just the tip of the iceberg that is y:da and crimepun's juicy relationship #imagine reading a book from 1866 because of a video game questline everybody hates #i stopped half way through bc i was lazy but picked it back up #and honestly the second half had me hooked #sometimes classics are classics for a reason #i do plan on (finally) writing an essay or something about it as i have so often threatened #and now that i've read it all i don't have any more excuses don't i

[vaguelyhauntedcornfield]

so many shows are being released for franchises I kinda like that im getting burnt out on watching shows/on the franchises PLS one or two a year is more than enough omg

#i can't keep up wwith this much tv #i havent watched the second season of the witcher yet #i stopped watching marvel showws #i havent seen arcane or the neil geiman show that just came out yet #i havent seen the lotr show #im probably not going to watch andor or will only see it thru my parents putting it on #and none of this is bc i dont want to see the shows or i hate them or whatever #IT'S JUST TOO MUCH #I CANT KEEP UP WITH THIS #I CAN PICK LIKE 2 OR 3 SHOWS TO WORK MY WAY THRU THATS IT #my brain cant hold onto that much info for multi season shows ok #like k dramas are ok bc they're one season usually #but these things???? #theyre getting RENEWED #i finish a show and immediately another one is out #i just want some time to breathe and maybe read a book omg #it's like so much that i just dont pay attention to what's being released anymore and im not watching things id probably otherwise enjoy #it feels like theyre repeating the downfall of network tv idk but like speedrunning it #like rn im watching bleach and loosely following mando and ofmd and waiting for their new seasons #and there are a few more i watch like bridgerton that im not that invested in #but like tv in general im just getting so hit in the face by that i dont want to watch

[4trackcassette]

I've just read Marilyn Robinson's What Are We Doing Here?: Essays and I found some of them very interesting and some very frustrating, but overall she can really put words together in a beautiful way.

#I hated pretty much everything she had to say on politics then again I think it's hard to write a good political essay about trump lol #The puritanism stuff got kind of repetitive but I did really enjoy her theological musings so I was less annoyed with that #Idk prev I had read Gilead and housekeeping both which I liked #I picked this up on a whim because I recognized it #It also helped that she moslty pulled scripture from the new testament which I took a class on #And from Romans which I wrote a paper on. I'm very intrigued by Paul #I also listened to Belle & sebastian pretty much the entire book. Which u know. Inflicts it's own sort of feeling and religous tinge #I don't have wifi and also don't have school so it's time to read lots of books #I mean I do have wifi #But not in my HOUSE #Also just registered for a half and a marathon :)