#i feel insignificant

[screaming--agony]

Dear Diary,

I want to feel like I matter.

#dear diary #do i #i want to matter #what's the point #not enough #i feel alone #struggling #insecure #poor body image #chronic migraine #anxiety #at a loss #does what i do matter #i feel insignificant #depression #i want to sleep #i'm exhausted #heart vs mind #i'm drained #i don't know why i feel this way #i'm trying my best #use me when you're bored

[iconicharry]

i swear people around me are so forgetful! how am i remembering an important fucking appointment you have the next week and you forget what fucking exam i’m writing that i worried for about a whole damn week????????

#i hate it so so so much #i feel insignificant

[sunnibits]

okay wait wait wait hold the fuck up. I may very well be reading into this too much but like. this picture is from the very end of ep8 right,, ARE THEY FUCKING WEARING IZZY’S GLOVE?????? or at least mimicking it???? um????

#HELLO??? 🥺🥺🥺 #like. I may just be crazy. but I feel like since vico is such an izzy stan like… #that doesn’t seem like an insignificant costuming choice… #and they didn’t have the glove on BEFORE izzy died….. #if I’m right I’m actually going to cry oh my god #imagine… like aragorn wearing boromirs bracers… #ofmd #ofmd spoilers #jim #izzy hands #jim jimenez

[orangecoffee1010]

It’s like burning….

#jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jjk fanart #jjk manga #kaori itadori #jin itadori #kenjaku #jjk kenjaku #jjk manga spoilers #kenjin #itadori jin #what level of delusion is thus #I feel like I way too passionate about something insignificant #Even the author forgot….hhnnn #jjk spoilers

[tell-tale-taeil]

.

#I feel insignificant #I feel inivisble #I feel not important #I feel not heard #I feel like submerging in water and disappearing forever #I do not wish to be

[arospecsyourblockdudes]

The Vast isn’t just about heights and the sky it’s about the smallness of the beholder it’s about looking into the sky at night and wondering how you can possibly matter in a universe of this size it’s seeing the ocean and getting vertigo as you realize how big the world is it’s people watching in a busy city and getting that feeling realizing you’re just a fleeting and lost memory in someone else’s life if they’ve noticed you at all it’s understanding that the people around you are full and whole people the way you are and you don’t matter to them it’s standing out in the middle of an empty field and seeing the horizon touching the grass and thinking is this all it is, is it just this forever

#empty fields scare me #I like the vast for how philosophical it can get #tma #the magnus archives #the vast #it’s abt feeling tiny and insignificant goddamnit #the sky is just the sky until you remember that you’re a dust mote compared to the lightyears of universe beyond

[torchickentacos]

#marketing class is... fascinating /negative so far #gender is too Not A Big Deal to me for this #it puts so much weight on how traditional gender roles influence shopping habits #which like. it's just weird to have to throw myself into that mindset of 'men vs women' for a grade #because in my mind‚ the lines between the two lean pretty insignificant #like i get it. i'm not here to cancel this random ass course skjskdsd it's just a weird feeling to have to consciously lean INTO that #like there are objective demographic differences and patterns but it feels WEIRD to be reading my textbook about how #you should market cleaning supplies to women and beer to men #like i know it's all just about numbers and it's literally not that deep but it feels offputting to me personally sdksdks

[itzrafee]

A thing on Uran and Helena in Pluto

Okay a short little thing on Pluto. Uran and Helena are my absolute favourite characters in Pluto. Urasawa has always had amazing side characters, from Mr. Rosso in Monster to Lee Harvey Oswald and Jackie in Billy Bat to God in 20th Century Boys, but very few have tied off the emotional ends of the story like Uran and Helena.

Maybe I'm projecting here but much like myself I feel like Urasawa is absolutely obsessed with Frankenstein. And he recognizes the influence Frankenstein has on Dr. Umataro Tenma. Or at the very least, the similarities between the two. And so when he made the protagonist of one of his most popular works Monster, Dr Kenzo Tenma, he solidified that connection. Kenzo Tenma calls back to Victor Frankenstein needing to end his creation while also calling back to Japan's other famous Tenma, thus making the connection explicit. Another throughline between the three of them is that all three are father figures to their creations and have obligations to their children, though all three have varying levels of success with them.

I've only read what I like to call Urasawa's "Core Four", conspiracy minded thrillers that are essentially road trips featuring usually two main protagonists that we see the world through, Monster, 20th Century Boys, Pluto and Billy Bat. Though I still haven't caught up to Asadora and that could still possibly fit this mold, Urasawa's Core Four share a lot of themes and ideas. One of the most important being the responsibility for one's creations, whether it was Kenji Endo and the Book of Prophecy or Kevin Yamagata and Billy Bat or Dr. Kenzo Tenma and Johan, all of his protagonists could arguably be seen as someone with the need to take up the responsibility of their creations. So where do the protagonists of Pluto fit in there? That's where Uran and Helena come in.

But first, we should take a look at Pluto's themes. While I could be wrong, at a cursory glance, I feel like the general consensus towards it's themes is that it's about hatred. I don't really think that's what it is as I feel like Urasawa is more trying to show us what it is to be human and what it is to be alive. And in that, he has a hidden protagonist in Pluto. Someone who's influence snakes through the plot and isn't seen much, but without who the story's themes would remain incomplete. Pluto tackles what it is to be alive through many things, such as memory, sadness, grief, hatred, love and parenthood. But none of that works without the realization by Tenma of his own mistakes. And Uran and Helena bookend these revelations and are absolutley key to understanding that.

In my favourite chapter of the series, Chapter 37, Uran goes from person to person as she finds a way to deal with her grief and eventually comes across Tobio's grave, Tenma having left recently. It's an absolutely beautiful chapter that shows Uran's humanity and Urasawa's love for sharing these kind and soft moments. But it also sheds a light on Tenma as Uran realizes someone who was grieving has just left. Without saying much at all we realize that Tenma has finally realized his mistakes. In the process of grieving one son, he lost the other. While remembering Tobio, he let Atom go. His grief towards Tobio is clear in the following chapter, Chapter 38. All of the things he wanted Atom to be; Tobio come back to life, Tobio's ghost punishing him, Atom rejected. And Tenma could only see that rejection, and not what he had, another son.

Uran shows us very clearly what Pluto, the story, is. It's a chapter in their lives. And we've come into a story nearing the end for Tenma. And it's through the humanity of two absolutely amazing characters in their own right, Uran and Helena, that we are able to so fully understand Tenma. Despite being robots, these two characters are the most alive of everyone. They love fully and freely and are catalysts of change. Uran's vibrant and full of life in a way that really sticks out. And Helena has such depth that it's evident in every scene she's in. She's not pointed out to be made by any famous scientist so all the life she has is her own. These two represent the life of robot's more than any other characters in the series.

So it's that much more poignant when Helena finally breaks down after putting on such a strong front of everybody. Grief intersects and she brings out Tenma's sadness as well. They've both been putting up such strong fronts that it's heartbreaking to see them collapse. It completes Tenma's growth and strikes a heartbreaking contrast between the two. Tenma became the way he is through the loss of his son whereas Helena doesn't even get to remember her own loss. It makes you wonder if the grief for her and Geischt's child compounds her sorrow too.

Without these two and their grief, a large part of Pluto becomes inaccessible. Pluto is largely about death so when two characters come in who've never had a hand in the grim work of taking life, you see the world through a lens that's absolutely crucial in order to fully connect with all of the character's and their situations. Death and Grief has scarred the characters in Pluto. Time and time again they've chosen the worst path. They've chosen revenge and hatred. But Uran and Helena are different. Without them, the story is incomplete. They provide an alternative. They provide the path towards healing.

im sorry for this one:

#naoki urasawa's pluto #helena #uran #pluto #pluto anime #umataro tenma #astro boy #this was supposed to be short #also its largely unreasearched #i would need to read the original atom and read all of urasawa's other works and read up on the gulf war before tackling a proper piece #random thoughts I didn't put in: #something i love about Pluto is how each robot is a reflection of their creators in some way or another with Uran being Ochanamizu's love #the combination of jackie and lee harvey oswald will probably throw off so many people who don't know(totally not why I did it) #also God #honestly though no side characters feel insignificant in Pluto #Some more shared ideas between the Core Four are the burdens we carry and share and the importance of stories in our lives

[cripplerage]

Please don't take it the wrong way but I've seen some people complaining about people in their early 20s and I have some thoughts. And I know 'haha, people make fun of other generations we're all having fun' but I don't think that's what I'm seeing.

It seems like people are claiming that the "your brain doesn't finish developing until you're 25" thing is starting to cause us to act younger than we are, and that we seem underdeveloped as adults in comparison to what older people were like at our age. That we act like we're still 16 and it's *annoying.* And these complaints are apparently regarding how we are in real life, not just being annoying online.

And don't get me wrong, we're still accountable for our actions. And I do understand what it's like to feel frustrated in adult spaces with such varying ranges of maturity and experience.

But these often seem to be the same people acknowledging that the cost of living crisis, the housing crisis, and a lot of politics as a whole have been drastically and rapidly declining for several years, particularly because of covid, and I'm not sure why they're not connecting the dots.

Like, yeah. I turned 18 in 2020. I won't get into details but it was very hard and very scary. I do sort of still feel like I'm 16, and I do still feel very lost and confused and unsure of myself. Most of us do. I know that I'm an adult and I have to act accordingly, but being annoying isn't a crime. If you have a more specific complaint then maybe don't direct it at an entire age range. Being able to exist normally around annoying people is part of being an adult, even I know that.

#if this gets 'outside of the intended audience' I'll probably delete it #because I HATE when people go 'lol look at this person crying about something so insignificant 🎻' and they all say the exact same thing #like if it's insignificant why do you feel the need to respond. huh #(reblogs are ok though)

[sideblogdotjpeg]

hey guys does anybody know whats the date today

#.... SORRY. #posts by me dot com #ok. i rembered it was hs day today and did this in about. 1 hour. at 5am rip #i. TTRULY did not spend enough time + i dont rmb enough to give them accurate and true classpects. but #okay. heres my rationale for all of them #callie rogue. obvs. her family are smugglers. she took one of those smuggled goods (serpent egg) and tried to give it to someone better. #stealing and redistributing hope etc. hope i chose for idea of potential & infinite possibilities (destiny peregrines). #also if i rmb right.. hope is one of the classes for like losers. which. i mean that is all of duck teams. losers who realise they suck #AND kick ass #sol blood. connections & bonds we fight for. also his whole arc abt family. etc etc #page because. ok uh #pages have a whole thing of starting out as nobodies and becoming someone. v dteam. i did also consider giving him knight but. ultimately #wanted to draw sol in the page shorts shorts. so. well. #calder i was. least sure abt #gave him void i think relates to his feeling of smallness/insignificance/uselessness + the helm... #and a knight. bcus hes a selfsacrificing guy. also his entire character is like... protecting ppl. very knightly #i dont remember that much abt the knight class tbh tho. RIP #also not featured but oliana/aryox seers of mind. OBVS #......... we are NOT main tagging this one gang B)

[lucifer-is-a-bag-of-dicks]

I love going to the local botanical gardens and being the Most Annoying Autistic alive

like I'm sorry but if a bird talks to me I am going to talk back these are Excellent Sound and I am going to Make Them

I have been honking at a goose for several minutes I'm having the time of my life

#lula's life #birds #I feel it's important to mention that I do in fact have a knack for mimicking bird sounds with decent accuracy #not all of them but a not insignificant amount #really impressed a guy once with my little wattlebird impression #he was trying to describe it to me so I could help ID it and we narrowed it down #to either little wattlebird or red wattlebird #I luckily had a lot of experience mimicking little wattlebirds because they frequent my parents garden #I'm also Very Good at goose honks

[echollama]

Me throughout the 3.8 summer event so far

(vrant in tag)

#echoes #genshin impact #iydia #first of all if you enjoyed the event hey good for you #this is just my experience with it #i'm in a weird state as #i thoroughly ENJOY the setting #the games are fun #the exploration is fun #the choo choo carts (omg my beloved) are fun albeit certain issues #but the story its... #it's like cotton candy #looks interesting but it it lacks nutrients when you eat it #genshin doing the rwby route by pulling out more characters instead of investing more on the ones we already have #idyia is interesting ngl and i do wanna know more about her #but do we need the choo choo brothers #the directors #the cousin outta no where #and the other quest givers who turn up only to show you the minigames and nothing else #that's how insignificant they feel #i dont even remember their names #so far the only characters i actually enjoy are the ones that dont even speak- the hydro eilodons #also is it just me but the writting is very... elementary #exposition at every step #almost hand holding #also i feel like the synergy between the gang is lacking #and not a lot of chemistry goes on between them #also that one hidden area with the mural #god i hit esc so fast when i saw the letters #cant bring myself to really enjoy the story this round

[mr-miss-sunny]

Realizing that they’ll never think of you the way you think of them

#and will never look at you the same way either #to be so insignificant to someone you love so much #i feel a hollow place in my heart #unrequited feelings #unrequited #heartache #unrequited love

[mermaidsirennikita]

I would actually argue that despite the very dubious choice to turn a very real and politically complex tragedy into children's entertainment, Anastasia is probably the one of the most romance novel-like traditionally animated movies out there

and a lot of it probably has to do with the fact that while obviously Anastasia is Anastasia, so much of the film's framing is on Anya and Dimitri's relationship, from the literal beginning with them as children, AND you get about as much of the story from his POV as hers

compared to the older Disney princess movies where the "heroes" have no personalities, a movie like The Little Mermaid which I love and find romantic and I love Eric but lbr a strong POV he does not have, or a movie like Hercules which has a legitimately great romantic subplot, but there is quite a bit of the movie which doesn't have much to do with the romance directly (again tho... excellent romantic subplot, Hercules and Meg are underrated as fuck)

really it does feel like a dual-sided romantic arc in Anastasia, and the best kind where she actually has a lot to do outside of falling in love and can't help but fall along the way, whereas he honestly has no reason to exist except for this woman but he is GREATLY INVESTED in tormenting himself about it, which strengthens his voice

#romance novel blogging #also i feel that there's a not-insignificant amount of romance writers or aspiring romance writers my age #who were heavily influenced by dimitri and anya

[worstloki]

not a fan of people saying Odin and Loki are similar in a moral or decisive sense, particularly when it comes to Thor. that makes it sound like Loki doesn't know Thor or care about him beyond what he symbolises (regarding Asgard/the throne/family/worthiness), when that's a defining part of their relationship

#like i get WHY people go 'oh Thor is like Frigga (they care™/bring Emotions in) and Loki is like Odin (calculating™ /For The Greater Good)' #but if you make such a clearcut comparison you neglect a lot of stuff that Odin and Loki do drastically different #like there are literal contrasts that are pretty evident around Thor particularly #like Odin does expect Thor to be some ideal version of himself that obeys Odin implicitly and doesn't have his own volatile emotions? #while Loki more sees that Thor isn't who he tries to pretend to be and generally encourages Thor to realize that #the most obvious parallel would be how they in TDW try telling Thor that Jane won't work out #and Odin goes for the whole 'well they're insignificant' angle despite Thor caring about the humans and Jane particularly #Odin tries to go 'here's Sif and since you shouldn't have your own preferences (they're wrong and bad) consider my choice' #he largely disregards Thor's emotions #most people do on Asgard???? #like it's literally wild how everyone saw Thor being major depressed and they basically told him to pretend to cheer up #like im sorry Thor's grief means nothing to y;all. he fell in love with someone very mortal and his brother is changed forever #Loki tries putting Thor off by first off. Thor KNOWS Jane isn't going to live long he's not never thought about it #he doesn't even make the decision for Thor he tells him to consider his choice well bc it WILL hurt him when she's gone #Loki is like treats Thor like a person and Odin is like nah I own him #I feel like in converting the brother/father relationship difference over people lose the differences in those aspect #they skip to similarities of heartlessness and Machiavellian ends meeting the means when Loki overall is #a far more moral character than Thor (at the start of Thor's arc) and Odin. and a lot of culturally Asgardian ideas #that's literally part of Loki's original characterization that he DIDN'T match up with their views #he didn't do stuff like take killing lightly like it's for fun and that's one of a long list of obvious aspects that make the setup cool #don't tell me Odin and Loki are the same #like there's some blanket understanding that Loki doesn't show or care about the people he loves #while Thor and Frigga have always been softhearted and refused to sacrifice themselves for what is deemed better for everyone #don't mistake selfishness for apathy and don't say Loki didn't cry himself through the first movie because duty to the throne comes first #that's literally Thor's bit #idk

[daincrediblegg]

#y’all I am. literally so unbearably unwell about new meat prison hari for some reason #couldn’t tell ya how but he’s really doing something for me #is it the prospect that he might change his thinking on emotions being insignificant? that in his century in the time out box he might have #figured out something of how he fucked up just a little? how he’s softening up to gaal a little and maybe starting to feel bad??? #is it the idea that a man so absorbed in math can finally understand the balance he needs in his own life not only for his plan to be #successful but also to allow himself feelings for individuals that he’s been repressing the whole fucking time??? #is it the prospect of this man being as tender as a chicken strip??? yeah you bet it is #hari seldon #foundation #I’m gonna go throw up I’m too emo about it #I love it when an idiot like that goes soft and it’s such a rare thing I really hope they let jared do it #and not yoink it away from me this time