#i can post the actual fic if anyone wants me to

[neverevan]

Fuck It Friday 💌

I keep wondering if people even know that I write... like, I know giffing has captivated me lately, but actually this is where I'm "based", so to speak. I just kinda fell off the map since the new season started airing (and since posting that 75k monstrosity that was the mudslide fic lmao).

Anyway, I am finally, finally getting closer to finishing the buck loves tommy fic (which pretty much does what it says on the tin, though it does have an actual title now), all it needs is some hefty editing and it's ready to be posted — hopefully within the next few days. Until then, here's some soft angst that somehow found its way into the middle of the smut.

“Good.” Tommy’s lips stretched into one of those wide but close lipped smiles and it was hard to hold back the urge to trace it with his thumb — so he didn’t. Tommy gave a small kiss to the tip of Buck’s thumb, before opening his lips and sucking it in between them, humming quietly. “God… did you get even hotter while you were away?” Buck mused with an incredulous huff. “Are you trying to talk your way into my pants?” Tommy’s grin was downright dangerous as he let go of Buck’s finger and leaned down to get a hold of the hem of his t-shirt, rolling it up as much as he could with the stupid sling in the way. “You’re not wearing any pants.” Buck pointed out with a teasing lilt of his voice. “Must be doing real good on all that talking then, huh?” “Funny.” Buck rolled his eyes jovially, but when Tommy didn’t answer or in fact moved at all, he zeroed in on his face with a frown. “H-hey, you okay?” “I don’t know. Are you?” Buck followed his line of sight, only to realize that Tommy was staring directly at the bruises on his ribs, where they were blooming like a collection of poisonous clematises; hugging his torso tight, probably for weeks to come. “Y-yeah, I told you, I’m fine. It’s- it’s just some bruising, no big deal, I swear.” “We can wait until you feel better.” Tommy suggested, his face darkening and his eyes never leaving the big blotches of purple and pink. “Baby, does it look like I wanna wait?” Buck scoffed, gesturing vaguely at his achingly hard cock, only inches away from Tommy’s own. “Evan, that’s not—” “You a-asked me what I need.” Buck cut him off with a serious set of his jaw. “This- this is what I need. You. That’s all I want, okay? So just… please, would you just touch me already?” Buck closed his eyes with a frustrated little sigh and only opened them when he felt a feather light touch on his skin, causing it to twitch with a tickle, as Tommy’s lips brushed over the bruises. “That okay?” He hummed quietly, his lips gently vibrating with it and bringing a small tingle into Buck's ribs, one that somehow felt like it was going much deeper than skin or bone. “Y-yeah… okay.”

✨I have been tagged by and am absolutely no pressure tagging the ever so talented @sunshinediaz @spagheddiediaz @jeeyuns @exhuastedpigeon @bidisasterevankinard @diazsdimples @likegoldintheair @honestlydarkprincess @watchyourbuck @actualalligator @wikiangela @bucksbignaturals @loveyouanyway and anyone else who feels like sharing mwuahhh 💛

#the smut is just some very rought draft at the moment but it's finally done #and the whole thing is nearly 9k unedited #which the people who do remember how i am when i write already know means it'll be a miracle if it comes out under 10k lmao #i kinda missed this ngl #anyway #911 #911 abc #bucktommy #wip #buck loves tommy

[wooahaes]

party of two

pairing: non-idol!joshua x fem!reader

genre: fluff. established relationship. silly fic <3

warnings: food mentions. reader having a lonely childhood/teenage years. mentions of reader being in therapy pre-fic. joshua hong being a silly, silly man. hints at suggestive stuff post-fic, but it's left vague. slow dancing to jopping <3

word count: ~1.1k

daisy's notes: ya think ya big boi throwing three stacks imma show you how to ball you a mismatch opinionated but im always spittin straight facts

The last thing you expected to come home to were streamers, balloons, and everything you’d need for someone’s birthday party.

Immediately, panic set in first. There didn’t seem to be anyone else in the apartment (and, truly, unless they were hiding in the bedroom or the bathroom, you would know), and Joshua had never gone behind your back to do something you asked him not to do before… But the decorations point to the party you asked him not to throw. Last year had been nice enough, sure, but you just wanted a quiet day with your boyfriend. Would it be worth it to step out and call him, just to clarify? 

Joshua walked past the entryway, stopping when he saw you were standing here. “Oh. Shit, you’re home early.” 

Forcing a smile, you just stepped over to slip out of your shoes and into your house slippers. “Mmhm. I was supposed to leave sooner, actually, but an emergency came up.” 

Joshua immediately set down the folded banner, snagging a party hat as he made his way over to you. “Well,” he said, stretching the string so that he could carefully put the hat on you. “We can party early, then.”

“Party?” You gave him a suspicious look.

“Party of two,” he booped your nose. “You said you didn’t have a lot of parties as a kid, so… When you told me to plan something fun, I thought we could do something silly.” 

Something about that made your heart swell in your chest. You’d told Joshua that you’d been a lonely kid (and teenager), rarely invited to parties and almost never having your own. It had messed with you growing up, sure, but you’d managed. Even though it felt silly to admit you’d gone to therapy over it, Joshua hadn’t judged you. He’d listened to your tales of attachment issues and other struggles carefully, nodding along and admiring your growth as a person. It hadn’t been easy, and it netted you some struggles with having healthy relationships in college, but you came out the other side with a new circle of friends who cared for you as much as you cared for them, and a healthy relationship with Joshua built on trust and communication. Still, it was nice to have him there to listen when you just needed to rant about how bullshit your youth had been. A week or so ago, it had been the realization that one of your birthday parties as a kid had been shared with a friend… who was probably the only reason people came.

“I don’t think that’s true,” Joshua had said after you finished your rant. “You were a kid. You said people liked you enough even if you weren’t invited to stuff.”

It was nice to have someone there who could ground you when you were getting too upset over things. Even now, as he stood before you with a stupid party hat sitting lopsided on his head, he’d taken your hand in his own. His thumb ran over your knuckles, watching as you looked past him to get a better view of the decorated living room. It’s all gold and shades of pink, and he just grinned at you.

“It’s all the store had today,”  he admitted. “I meant to go sooner, y’know, but… Kinda had some other things I needed to get in order.” 

Joshua took your other hand, swinging them as you finally melted a little and smiled at him. A party for the just two of you was particularly cheesy, but if it was with Joshua, you’d be happy to attend. “So…” You stepped forward. “What are we gonna do at this party?”

His gaze flickered down to your lips for just a moment. Yet the moment you leaned in, he reached up to press his fingers against them, stopping you in your tracks. “Keep it PG,” he teased with a mischievous grin you wanted to kiss off of him. “PG-13, if you have to.” He chuckled, kissing your cheek. But instead of pulling away immediately, he leaned in, breath hot against your ear, “we can do more later, if you want.” 

No promises made, though: you’d have to see how you were feeling then. But you did take the chance to press a quick peck against his cheek before he could move away. Joshua guided you into the apartment, already rattling off about all of the plans he’d made. He’d ordered a tiny cake for the two of you to share, bought your favorite flavor of ice cream, bought pizza to really hammer home the idea of this being a casual party (not that you minded: the two of you cooked for each other often enough, getting takeout was a welcome break). He made no promises of party games or a plethora of gifts for you to unwrap… But he did pull out his phone, connected to the bluetooth speaker and turned up music—loud enough for the two of you, but not enough to bother the neighbors now. 

“Well?” He extended his hands to you again. “Do you wanna dance?”

Joshua Hong knew you couldn’t dance for shit. It was one of the things he pointed out to you when you were half-asleep one night and he drunkenly needed to tell you the little things he loved most about you. He said you were as graceful as a baby deer, but he loved it when you felt safe enough to be silly around him.

So you just accepted his hands. “I’d love to.” 

He just smiled at you before pulling you in, chest to chest, as he began to sway with you to music that was far from swayable. “No, you wouldn’t.”

You snorted in response. “Yeah… I wouldn’t,” you reached up, draping your arms around his neck. The sounds of Taeyong’s rap in the background nearly made you laugh. “But I like holding you.” 

“Ulterior motives,” he hummed. “By the way… I was thinking… For our wedding song—”

“Joshua.” The two of you weren’t even engaged yet, but you already knew what he was thinking.

He gasped in mock offense. “Are you telling me you don’t want to walk down the aisle to Mark’s rap in this song?”

It earned a real, warm laugh from you, and the look of pride on Joshua’s face told you that his job was done. He’d let you go soon and dance with you properly… But for now, he’d continue to sway with you, chatting about your day as he admired you a little longer.

taglist: @twancingyunhao@wonuziex@synthetickitsune@porridgesblog@staranghae @weird-bookworm @bangchansbae @laylasbunbunny @bewoyewo

#wooahaes.fic #seventeen x reader #seventeen imagine #svt x reader #svt imagine #seventeen x you #svt x you #joshua hong fluff #joshua x reader #joshua fluff #joshua hong x reader #joshua x you #wooahaes.24

[kiwiana-writes]

Six(ish) Sentence Sunday

Thanks @welcometololaland @beautifulhigh @orchidscript for the tags today—hopefully that’s everyone, apologies if not—and to everyone who’s tagged me over the last few weeks. The old mental health is once again Not Great Jim and writing is not coming easily but unfortunately it is also the only way I know how to feel good about myself so here we are persevering etc.

This is from the blackmail kink fic—if that’s something you’re morally opposed to, I support your right to feel that way but I also do not care, keep scrolling xoxo

Snippet is under the cut but first, tagging @agame-writes @affectionatelyrs @anincompletelist @blueeyedgrlwrites @cactusdragon517

@celeritas2997 @cha-melodius @clottedcreamfudge @cricketnationrise @dumbpeachjuice

@everwitch-magiks @firenati0n @getmehighonmagic @happiness-of-the-pursuit @heysweetheart-writes

@hgejfmw-hgejhsf @indestructibleheart @inexplicablymine @jellibuns @junebugclaremontdiaz

@leaves-of-laurelin @littlemisskittentoes @lizzie-bennetdarcy @matherines @myheartalivewrites

@ninzied @nocoastposts @nontoxic-writes @notspecialbabe @piratefalls

@read-and-write- @rmd-writes @sherryvalli @ships-to-sail @smc-27

@sparklepocalypse @stereopticons @tintagel-or-cockleshells @whimsymanaged and, as always, anyone who wants to play! (If you take the open tag please tag me so I can see!!)

Otherwise, (hopefully) enjoy the spice below the cut…

It started on Reddit, as all good decisions do.

Alex has always had a bit of a thing about being watched. It’s not narcissism—shut the fuck up, Nora—he just… really fucking likes knowing that he’s the one getting someone off. Since starting college, Alex has perfected the art of the risqué selfie; keeping his abs and thighs in the shot as well as his dick, lighting himself well, making sure he’s suitably vocal as he strokes himself when he posts a video instead of a picture. Reddit, with its ridiculous number of NSFW subreddits ranging from the expected to the terrifyingly specific, is an instant feedback loop of people more than willing to tell him, in explicit detail, exactly what it is about his body and his actions and his sounds that brings them over the edge. His DMs range from respectfully horny to disrespectfully horny in a way he’s been very clear he’s onto, with only the odd one that is actually disrespectful, and they find themselves on the inconvenient side of the block button before Alex can say ‘fuck off’.

And then, a few months after he started posting semi-regularly, he opened his Reddit chats to find a message reading simply:

NYU? Pretty sure I recognise that view out your window haha

It should have been terrifying. It was, genuinely, a good reminder about stranger danger. Except Alex had gotten a hand around his cock without thinking about it, staring at the words on his phone screen, mind spinning with the possibility that someone could put two and two together, that someone on campus might have dozens of pictures of Alex’s dick on their phone without Alex knowing, that someone could put him on his knees to stop his secret getting out…

He’d come harder and faster than he had in months, and spent the next several hours down a brand new fucking rabbit hole.

#six sentence sunday #kiwiana-writes #fic: sometimes it's better when it's publicly

[mystique-6]

Kinktober Day 10: Butt Stuff?(I refuse to use the name of the actual prompt as the title)

Summary: Astarion asks to try something very specific in the bedroom. Ailis agrees even though it makes her nervous.

Hello! My hyperfixation on Astarion has got me in the writing mood so I will be participating in Kinktober using @flightlessangelwings Kinktober list. The pieces may be part of a bigger fic(s). I have started the fic. If you like these pieces in this series, please consider checking out my main fic, This is Me Trying. (Can you tell I like Taylor Swift?) Either way, I hope you enjoy. I do plan on completing the 31 prompts though it will take me past October. I also have the fic posted on AO3.

Warning: Anyone under 18 do not interact. Please pay attention to the tag warnings below.

Tags: Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, Lube, Enemas, Light Dom/Sub, Kissing/Gentle Kissing, Feelings Realization

Additional Notes: This fic involves Spawn Astarion and we are back to the sweet and soft version.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything from BG3.

            Ailis went to pick up the crate of washed dishes when she felt her ass be groped.  She whirled around to give the person a piece of her mind and found Astarion smiling at her.  He was clearly trying to stifle a laugh.

            “Hello, darling,” he said and then kissed her on the cheek.  She felt her aggravation slip away, but she didn’t want to completely let him off the hook.       

            “There are nicer ways to greet me, you know,” she said tersely.

            “I disagree,” he replied.  “Any chance to touch your perfect behind must be taken.”

            “I didn’t know it was you,” she huffed.

            “I don’t think Wyll or Gale would be brave enough to try it,” Astarion said with a smirk.  “Halsin might, but you most certainly would have heard him coming.”

            “Hmm,” she hummed and bent to pick up the crate again.  Astarion beat her to it.

            “I’ll get that for you,” he said and began to lead them back towards the center of camp.

            “You’re going to help with a chore?” she said.

            “Well, I am helpful like that,” he replied and she laughed out loud.

            “What do you want, Astarion?” she asked.

            “Darling, I’m hurt!” he exclaimed, though his broad smile suggested otherwise.  “Why would you assume I’d only offer help if I want something?”

            “Maybe because I have to badger you to complete camp chores when it’s your turn,” she said.  “If you’re offering me any kind of aid, then you want something.  Spit it out, Astarion.  What do you want?”  He set the crate don and pulled her by the waist into a kiss.  She smiled against his lips and snuggled in closer to him, wrapping her arms tightly around his torso.  When he broke off the kiss, he brushed a strand of her hair off her face and stared into her eyes tenderly.

            “I want to try something new with you tonight.  I’m not sure if it’s something you’ve done before,” he said.  The first time he’d said that to her, she’d scoffed and insisted there wasn’t much she hadn’t tried.  She’d been rather adventurous in her youth.  Her confidence had proven to be hubris.  She’d realized quickly that Astarion had much more sexual experience than her and there was quite a lot she hadn’t tried before.  He never once made her feel bad for not knowing something and he was always patient with her if she had concerns.  So, the prospect of trying something new with him now intrigued her.

            “What do you have in mind?” she asked, her heart fluttered with excitement and anticipation.  Astarion smiled as he noticed it and brushed his thumbs across her cheeks as he cradled her head in his hands and kissed her forehead.  She smiled.  He really wanted whatever was on his mind.

            “Have you ever tried anal sex?” he asked, doing his best to sound casual, but he was clearly anxious asking her.  Considering her racing heart nearly came to a dead stop at the question, she supposed she understood why he sounded a little hesitant.  She shouldn’t be shocked he was asking.  He’d never outright asked her before, or even said he wanted anal sex, but he’d hinted at it with words and touches.  She knew Astarion wanted in her ass.  She’d have thought, as a vampire spawn, he’d be more of a neck guy.  And right now, she really wished he was.  She wasn’t sure how she felt regarding anal sex.  She didn’t think it was wrong or anything, but the concept of it made her nervous.  That’s why she’d skirted around his hints before.  She couldn’t do that now that he’d outright asked her and was waiting on an answer.

            “No,” she said, drawing out the word.  “I haven’t.”  Astarion nodded, even though she knew he’d expected that answer.

            “Are you interested in trying it?” he asked.  He had his arms wrapped around her waist, but not so tightly she couldn’t break free of his hold.  He was giving her the choice to stay close to him or take space if she needed it.  For that reason alone, she didn’t pull away and reached up with one hand to gently tug at a white curl resting above his forehead.

            “I’m guessing you are?” she said, avoiding the question.  He smirked.  He knew what she was doing.

            “I’ve had anal sex before, Ailis.  Giving and receiving.  You know this,” he said.  She nodded.  She knew.  “I would like to try it with you, but I’m not sure how you feel about it, other than that it clearly makes you nervous.  Are you at all interested?”  She squirmed and tried to think of a way to divert the conversation, but her mind stayed blank.  She glanced at his expectant gaze and sighed.

            “I’ve never considered it before,” she said.  He didn’t look surprised.

            “Are you willing to consider it now?” he asked softly, running a hand gently up and down her back, trying to ease her tension.  She hesitated.

            “Won’t it be painful?” she asked, thinking about where his dick would breach.  The anus wasn’t the vagina.  It wasn’t designed to have anything go up it.

            “There may be some pain,” he admitted, “but with proper prep it shouldn’t be unbearable.”  She pursed her lips as she thought about it.  “Ailis.”  She glanced back at his face.  “Do you really think I’d suggest something that would cause you tremendous pain?”  That questioned settled it for her.

            “No,” she said.  “I don’t.  All right.  We can try it.”  He smiled widely at her and pulled her in closer for a kiss.

            “Meet me at our spot in fifteen minutes,” he told her and then hurried off.  She smiled fondly at his retreating figure until her eyes landed on the crate of clean plates. 

            “What an asshole,” she sighed, and grabbed the crate and headed back to camp.

            Fifteen minutes later, Ailis stepped into the abandoned building of the Last Light Inn that she and Astarion had essentially made their hook up spot.  He was already there, pulling a clean sheet over the mattress.  She saw he had supplies ready on the bedside table.  The bottle of oil didn’t surprise her, but she didn’t know what to think at the sight of the 2-liter bag attached to a tube and nozzle.

            “Hello, darling,” Astarion greeted her as he approached.  He pulled her into a kiss.  “Ready?”

            “I guess.  I’m nervous,” she admitted.  He gave her a soft smile and kissed her forehead.

            “That’s understandable, but you’re with a professional,” he said.  “I’ll make this a good experience for you.”  She smiled and leaned into his chest as she wrapped her arms around him in a hug.  His own wrapped around her torso and he squeezed her tightly against him.  He kissed the crown of her head and they stayed that way for a moment, both enjoying the other’s presence.

            “Okay,” she said, pulling a way.  “Let’s get started.”  His lips quirked up in an amused smile.

            “All right,” he agreed and lifted the 2-liter bag of water up off the nightstand.  “Let’s get started on the prep work.  Do you know what this is?”  She was about to shake her head, but then paled as realization hit her. 

            “Is that an enema?” she asked appalled.  Astarion put down the enema bag on the bed.

            “It is,” he said evenly.  She could tell her was trying to keep her from freaking out, but also giving her space to have an honest reaction.  That was probably the only reason why she didn’t flee immediately.

            “Why do you have that?” she asked.

            “It’s part of the prep.  Anal sex can be messy.  Taking an enema first can fix that problem,” he explained.

            “So, you want me to…” She broke off.  She couldn’t finish that sentence.  “Is it really necessary?”

            “It is for me,” he said.  “I’ve had to deal with the mess before and it’s never been my choice.  I won’t do this without you taking the enema.”  His voice was firm, but he wasn’t arguing with her, or trying to be difficult.  He was just setting a boundary.  But his boundary was pushing at one of her own.

            “I…” She didn’t really know what to say.

            “Ailis, have you ever had an enema before?” he asked.  Her face turned tomato red.  Her instinct was to deny it, but instead she nodded, while at the same time, wrapping her arms tightly around herself in a self-soothing hug.  “I take it that it wasn’t a good experience.”  He said it softly.

            “It was not,” she said stiffly.  “I don’t want to talk about it.”

            “I’m not going to make you talk about it, but I would like to understand why you are so averse to it,” he replied.  “Did it cause you pain?  Were you…”

            “It was embarrassing, okay?” she snapped.  “I felt shamed over it for weeks!”  She found herself pulled into a tight hug.  She slowly felt her tension ease and she unwrapped her arms from her own torso to wind around his.

            “I’m sorry you were made to feel shame over it before,” he murmured softly in her ear.  “I don’t know who administered one to you before, an old lover or your mother, but you didn’t deserve to be made to feel bad over it.”  He tipped her chin up to make eye contact with her.  “I promise I won’t do that to you.  We’ll get it done and over with and move on to more enjoyable activities.  It won’t be brought up outside of here.”  She believed him, but she still hesitated.  He played with a loose strand of her hair.

            “We also don’ have to do this, Ailis,” he said.  “It’s okay if you change your mind.”

            “But you want this,” she said.

            “I do,” he said, “but not at your expense.  We can do something else that you’re more comfortable with.”  She buried her face in his chest and he ran his hands soothingly up and down her back and stamped an occasional kiss to the top of her head.  She sighed after a moment and pulled back.

            “How do you need me positioned to administer it?” she asked.

            “You’re certain, Ailis?” he asked and she nodded.  “All right, then.  Come to this side of the bed and lie on your side facing the door.  Remove your pants and undergarment first.”  She did as he directed.  He adjusted her to be centered a little closer to the middle of the bed, and then hooked the enema bag to the bedpost.  She started to roll over onto her stomach and raise her hips, but he stopped her.

            “You don’t need to get in that position, darling,” he told her softly.  He gently pushed her right leg up until her knee was parallel to her chest.  She saw him reach for the oil and knew he was putting some on the nozzle.  She jumped when he fingers spread some oil around her entrance, and then tensed when she felt the nozzle nudge at it.

            “I need you to relax,” Astarion said soothingly.  “Take a deep breath for me.”  She did as he said and felt some of her tension ease from her.  At the same moment, she felt the nozzle slide into her and she made a face.  It didn’t hurt, but it was uncomfortable.  And if this was uncomfortable, she couldn’t imagine how his dick would feel.  Her thoughts broke off from that though, when she felt water begin to flow into her.  She flinched and Astarion immediately climbed into bed behind her and pulled her back to his chest while murmuring words of encouragement in her ear.  She tried to focus on the words he was saying, but it was hard to focus on anything other than the odd sensation of watering flowing into her.  Her stomach began to feel full and tight and suddenly a cramp ripped across her lower abdomen.  She whimpered, and the flow of water stopped.  

            “Cramp?” Astarion asked.  She nodded and squeezed her eyes shut as another rolled through her.  Astarion lowered a hand to her distended abdomen and massaged it, trying to ease the cramp.  She sucked in a few deep breaths and finally her muscles relaxed.  “That’s it.  You’re doing so well.  You only have half left.”

            “There’s still that much left?” she whined.  He kissed her cheek.

            “It’ll be over soon, Ailis,” he assured her.  She sighed, but nodded, and he unclamped the tube.  She grimaced as the water began to flow again.  She began to curl in on herself as another cramp tore at her abdomen.  She felt Astarion reach for the clamp again, but she stopped him.

            “Leave it.  I want this over with sooner rather than later,” she said through gritted teeth.

            “But you’re in pain,” he replied.

            “I’ve felt worse.  Just let it empty,” she growled.  He sighed, but left the clamp alone.  He moved his hand back to her abdomen and tried to tub out the cramp.  After another moment the water stopped.  “Is it done?”

            “Yes, but I want you to try and hold it for fifteen minutes,” he replied.

            “What?  Why?” she cried.

            “To ensure your entire system is cleared out,” he said and she groaned.

            “Fine,” she agreed sullenly.

            “Do you want me to remove the nozzle?” he asked.  “You might feel more secure with it in.”

            “No, I want it out,” she said insistently.

            “Of course, darling,” he replied and she felt him gently ease it out of her.  She immediately curled up into a ball.  He curled around her and stroked her hair.  She tried to breathe her way through cramps, but they kept increasing and it wasn’t long before she felt the urge to go.

            “How long has it been?” she asked.

            “Five minutes,” he answered.  She whined.

            “I have to go,” she complained.

            “Try to hold it a little longer, Ailis,” he told her.  “Ten minutes isn’t as long as it feels.”

            “Easy for you to say.  You’re not the one dealing with these cramps,” she grumbled.  He kissed the top of her head.

            “You’re almost done,” he assured her.  She muttered a few curses under her breath and he laughed.  She tried to focus on his hands gently stroking her wherever he touched rather than on the cramps, but she was fighting a losing battle.

            “I can’t!” she cried.  “I need to…I’m going to…”

            “All right.  It’s all right, darling.  Go,” he said and she shot off the bed and out the door.  She didn’t even take the time to slip on her pants.  She just hoped none of her companions were around to see her. 

            About twenty minutes later, she rejoined Astarion in the abandoned building.  She saw he’d cleaned up and put away the enema equipment and she felt immensely grateful to him.  He looked up at her cautiously from where he sat on the bed and held his arms out to her.  She rushed into them and he pulled her down on his lap for comfort.  She buried her face in his neck and he held her tightly as he began to rock her.  It wasn’t long before she felt her nerves were soothed and she remembered why she’d agreed to that particular prep work.  And although she still felt nervous over it, she decided to move the night forward.

            She stamped a kiss to his neck and then his jaw and then the corner of his mouth.  When he started to smile, she kissed him deeply, moving a hand up to frame his face while the other tangled in his hair at the base of his head.  He held her tighter in return.  When the kiss finally broke, she leaned back and removed her shirt and upper garment.  She reached for the base of his shirt, but he grabbed her hand and stopped her. 

            “Not yet, darling,” he said and pressed a kiss to her palm.  “There’s certain logistics that need to be discussed.”

            “Such as?” she asked nervously.

            “I know you typically like to be face to face during the act, but it might be physically easier on you if I enter from behind,” he said cautiously.  She hesitated.  Since they had found their spot at the Last Light Inn, they had been able to expand upon sexual positions they enjoyed as she was less likely to be triggered looking down on a mattress than dirt that reminded her of her trauma.  That being said, her nerves were on fire.  She wasn’t sure she liked the idea of not being easily able to see his face.

            “I’m not sure,” she replied.  “I don’t know if it’s a good idea.” 

            “Do you think you can manage it while I prep you?” he asked.  “I’m not trying to push your boundaries, Ailis.  I just want to make this as easy on you as possible.”

            “I think I can handle that,” she said hesitantly and he kissed her again.

            “Stand up for a minute for me, darling,” he ordered and she obeyed.  She watched as he removed his shirt and then adjusted the pills on the bed.  When he had them how he wanted them, he guided her down onto the bed.  He maneuvered her so her hips rested on a pillow, raising her ass in the air.  He’d also arranged a pillow for her to hold onto if she wanted.  She wasn’t normally inclined to grasp onto her hide moans in a pillow, but tonight she thought there was a chance she’d need to.  She squeezed the pillow and tensed when she saw him take the jar of oil from the nightstand.

            “I need you to relax for me, darling,” he said, running a soothing hand up and down her spine.  “Take a few deep breaths.”  She did as he said and slowly relaxed.  She heard him uncap the bottle and then he parted her cheeks so he could access her more easily.  She stiffened again when she felt a cool, wet finger press against her puckered hole.  He pressed a kiss to the bottom of her spine and she took another deep breath as he played around her entrance, applying pressure, but not yet breaching it.  As she got used to the sensation, she finally relaxed completely and that’s when he pushed in.  She squawked at the foreign sensation as he slowly pushed into her and tensed.  She felt every groove in his finger as she clenched around it.

            “Are you all right?  Does this hurt?” he checked in.

            “It doesn’t hurt,” she replied.  “But it…it feels weird.”

            “Good weird or bad weird?” Astarion asked and she looked over her shoulder to see him grinning in amusement.  She scowled.

            “Just weird,” she replied tersely.  His free hand soothingly massaged the back of one of her thighs.

            “You’ll get used to the feeling,” he promised.  “I know if can be shocking the first time.  Now try and relax again, darling.  I can’t move without hurting you while you’re this tensed against me.”  She listened and took a few deep breaths.  This time, she also fantasized over their post-coital cuddling and her muscles eased up faster. 

            “That’s good, darling,” he praised and began to move his finger inside her.  Her brows furrowed at the strange sensation, but after a while, she did grow accustomed to his exploratory thrusts.  And it wasn’t awful.  She could feel a spark of interest between her legs, but the interest died when she felt another finger at her entrance.  He began to slide a second finger in with the first, and this time, there was pain.  She tensed and the pain sharpened as she stretched around his fingers.  She let out a sputtering gasp, and he stopped.

            “You need to relax, darling.  You’ll only make this painful if you’re this tense,” Astarion said. 

            “I tensed because it hurts,” she panted between quick breaths. 

            “It can be a little painful at first.  It shouldn’t be unbearable though.  I’ll use more oil,” he told her and removed both fingers.  She took the moment to suck in a few deep breaths and almost managed to relax before both fingers were at her entrance again.  They slowly pushed in, but even with the extra oil, there was still a slight pain from the stretch.  She focused on her breathing and tried to set her mind on a fantasy of the them together, but she couldn’t fully ignore the odd feeling of his fingers dragging against her inner walls in a part of her body she was growing more and more sure of that he didn’t belong in.

            “Tell him to stop then,” a voice inside her head said.  She opened her mouth to do so, but stopped.  This was something Astarion really wanted.  He’d asked her for this, and despite always being the one in charge of their sexual escapades, he rarely asked for anything.  She had to at least give it a fair chance, and in her opinion, two fingers were not a fair chance.  Two fingers were barely a chance at all.  So, she continued to draw in shallow breaths until his fingers were pushed fully inside her.  He stopped moving and she tried to focus her mind on anything but the ache caused by his fingers inside her.

            Thankfully, he also wanted her mind on something else.  He leaned over her and kissed her cheek.  He trailed kissed up to her ear and sucked the lobe into his mouth.  She gasped and couldn’t help a slight thrust of her hips.  The movement caused him to move inside her, but he didn’t give her a second to think about the slight pain it caused.  He used his free hand to brush her hair off her neck and began to kiss and nibble his way down her neck.  He then moved to a shoulder blade and pressed a soft kiss to it before he bit down, though not hard enough to break skin.  This time when she thrust down, there was enough friction to tease her clit and a spike of pleasure went through her so strong that even his fingers inside her felt good and she moaned.

            She felt him smile against her shoulder, and he started to move his fingers inside her again.  There was a slight sting as he pumped and scissored her open, but she was beginning to enjoy the feeling.  She experimentally thrust her hips back towards him and groaned as his fingers sunk impossibly deeper insider her. 

            “Mmm.  Yes.  That’s it, darling,” he practically purred.

            “Harder,” she ordered and he laughed but obeyed.  He thrust harshly into her a few times and she chased after her please as she thrust into the pillow and then back on his fingers.  She let out a frustrated whine when he removed his fingers completely.  She opened her mouth to complain, but her jaw snapped shut when she felt three fingers prodding at her entrance.  She tried to remain relaxed and focus on the pleasure she’d been feeling, but she couldn’t even think to move her hips to get friction as the sharp, burning sting returned worse than ever as he stretched her wide.  She bit her lip as her eyes watered and tried to bear it, but the pain worsened the deeper he went and she whimpered, feeling a tear spill over and down her cheek.  He immediately removed his fingers. 

            “Okay, Ailis.  I’m stopping,” he said in a soothing tone.  He tried to help her roll over, but she resisted.

            “No.  I’m fine,” she said, quickly brushing the tear away.  “You can continue.”  She glanced over her shoulder and saw him frowning.

            “Ailis, you clearly don’t like this,” he said.

            “I was enjoying it a minute ago.  I just need to adjust.  Now, come on,” she urged, raising her hips up to put her ass on display, trying to tempt him back into sex.

            “Ailis, sit up,” he ordered and she sighed.  She shifted onto her side and rested her head on her hand so she could look up at him.  He brushed a strand of hair out of her face and gave her a soft look.  “Why are you trying to force yourself through this and why do you want me to let you?”

            “You asked to try this,” she said, frowning.

            “Yes.  And you agreed to it,” he said, “but you aren’t enjoying this.”

            “I was enjoying it a few minutes ago.  I just…”

            “You were enjoying humping against the pillow,” he said.  “You were tolerating me fingering your ass.”  She scowled.

            “I didn’t tell you to stop, so why are you?” she snapped.  “You have the go ahead.”

            “Why would I want to keep doing something you’re not enjoying?” he said.

            “You like anal sex,” she said.

            “Yes, but I like you more and you don’t,” he replied looking completely baffled by her obstinance.

            “You asked for this.  You almost never ask for anything when it comes to sex,” she cried.  “So, I need to give this a fair chance.”  He stared at her with wide eyes and tugged his hair with his hands before taking a deep and unneeded breath.

            “I think you’ve given it a fair chance, Ailis,” he said gently.

            “A few fingers aren’t a fair chance,” she argued.

            “I think it is,” he said.  Angry tears filled her eyes.

            “Well, I don’t,” she replied.  “It’s not a fair chance until you get your dick in me and actually fuck me.”  The tears spilled over.  He brushed them away before she could.

            “I think we should stop, Ailis,” he said softly.

            “No,” she refused.  He sighed, but nodded.

            “I’m only going to agree to continue if you accept my bargain, all right?” he said.

            “What bargain?” she asked.

            “If you aren’t enjoying it after I’m inside you after three thrusts, we’re putting an end to this,” he stated firmly.  “I think we should put an end to this now, but I will continue against my better judgement if you agree to this bargain.”

            “Ten thrusts,” she bargained.

            “Five,” he returned with a sigh.

            “Eight.”

            “Five, Ailis,” he said.  “No more.”

            “Fine,” she snapped.  “Five.”  She flopped back over on her stomach.  He snorted.  She waited for him to resume prepping her, but he draped himself over her back and grabbed her arm and then brought I down underneath her and settled her fingers over her core. 

            “Touch yourself,” he ordered.

            “W…what?” she said.  He pressed their entwined hands down so her fingers put pressure on her clit.  She gasped.

            “Touch yourself,” he repeated, practically growling in her ear.  She mewled and began rubbing circles over her clit.  He removed his hand as she began to work herself over.  His fingers returned to her entrance.  She hesitated for a second.  “Don’t stop, Ailis.”  She continued and he sunk one, then two fingers back inside her.  She groaned, but any discomfort she felt was outweighed by the pleasure from the attention she was giving to her clit.  He thrust his fingers in her once, then twice, and on the third thrust, she pushed her hips back to meet him.

            The next time she felt him at her entrance, three fingers breached her.  The burn returned, but she continued to play with herself and after a moment, the burn eased and she fucked herself back on his fingers as he pushed into her and scissored her open.  Suddenly, he removed all fingers and she whined in complaint.

            “Sorry, darling, but I believe you wanted a change of position,” Astarion teased, rolling her over onto her back.  She reached up for him to pull him into a kiss and he humored her.  When he pulled away, he reached for the pillow under her and tugged it until she was positioned how he wanted her, with her hips lifted up off the mattress.  He removed his pants and undergarment and she saw his thick and turgid cock and felt a spark of anxiety.  It was far larger than three fingers.

            “You’re not going to fit,” she said.  He smirked, and she could tell he was stifling a laugh.

            “I’ll fit,” he assured her.  “Are you ready?”  She wasn’t sure, but she nodded.  His cocked lined up to her entrance and began to push in.  The burn was worse than each time before.  She bit her lip to keep from whimpering, but she couldn’t help a tear from escaping.  “I can stop, Ailis.”

            “We agreed on five thrusts,” she ground out through gritted teeth.

            “But if this is unbearable for you…”

            “It’s not.  Continue,” she ordered.  He sighed.

            “Try to relax.  And keep touching yourself, Ailis.  I didn’t tell you that you could stop,” he said.  She groaned and did as he ordered, increasing pressure on her clit to combat the burn as he pushed into her until finally, he bottomed out.  She panted as she tried to adjust to him.  Astarion was large.  Even vaginally, he was a lot to take, but she didn’t think she ever felt so full as she did right now.  She used the arm she wasn’t using to pleasure herself to wrap around his waist to keep him close.  He kissed her damp cheek and then slowly began to slide out.  He pulled back only about halfway, before slowly thrusting back in.  She took a deep breath and bore another two thrusts.  On the fourth her drew back farther, and she wrapped a leg around him and pushed at him when he thrust in, forcing him somehow even deeper inside her.

            They both groaned, and Astarion stopped holding back.  He pulled all the way out, and then shoved back in.  She felt the burn of it, but the sensation was almost pleasurable now.  The next time he thrust in she pushed forward to meet him.  One of his hands found hers and forced it to the mattress by her head, and held it there gently with his own.  They kissed sloppily, though passionately as they moved together, panting into each other’s open mouths as they joined together.  Ailis felt his rhythm start to falter and knew he was about to cum.  She was nearly there herself.  Tension was building in her core.  Sparks of pleasure shooting off like electricity as she played over her clit.  Muscles in her thighs and core were twitching and she felt her cunt start to clench.  She increased the pressure on her clit and her body jerked as she went over the edge.  All thought seeped from her mind as the world around her faded. 

            When she came back to herself, she noticed Astarion had stopped moving.  He laid across her torso, and was pressing gentle kisses to her neck.  She could feel him still inside her, though he was soft now.  He’d also found release.  She lifted a hand and carded it through his now messy, white curls.  He smiled against her jugular and then pushed himself up so he could look at her face.

            “How are you feeling, darling,” he asked.  His smile was fond and relaxed, but she saw caution and worry in his eyes.  She cupped his face in her hands and gently pulled him down to her for a deep and languorous kiss.

            “Never been better,” she replied when the kiss ended.  He smiled and stroked her cheek.

            “Did you like it though?” he asked.  “And don’t lie to me.  Please.”  She hesitated, and thought over her response.  She didn’t hate it, but…

            “Maybe we can relegate it to special occasions,” she said.  “When is your birthday?”  He laughed and kissed her again.  When he pulled back this time, he also pulled out of her and she winced.  He immediately moved down her body to inspect her entrance.  She grimaced as he probed a her gently for a moment.

            “No tears,” he told her.

            “I didn’t think there would be,” she said.  “You said you’d make this a good experience for me.”  He smiled and they kissed again before he rolled off of her and then pulled her back against his chest.  His arms wrapped snuggly around her.

            “Thank you for this,” he murmured in her ear.  She smiled, and snuggled back against him, trying to eliminate any space between their skin.  She started to drift off to sleep when suddenly her eyes shot open wide ad her heart began to pound against her ribcage.  The cold, icy grip of fear latched onto her as she realized what she’d been trying to suppress for weeks now.  What she felt was the absolute truth.  This was no longer a fling to her.  She loved him…and that terrified her. 

#astarion #astarion ancunin #bg3 astarion #bg3 #bg3 tav #kinktober

[performativezippers]

I absolutely love Alone and would love the director’s cut of it, but particularly of this part

Kate is taller than Lucy by a good six inches, but she seems small right now, curled in on herself, like she’s bracing herself against something heavy and devastating.

Lucy’s forgotten to be angry for the last few minutes, too focused on figuring out the mystery of what is making Kate so twitchy, on picturing the woman she loved lying in pool of her own coagulating blood, but as the answer makes itself clear to her, she can already feel the rage starting to simmer in her gut again.

It’s the only gap in the timeline. It’s the only thing that makes sense.

All she has to say is, “How’d you get to the hospital?” and Kate looks up at her, pressing her lips into a thin, white line, the worry lines in her forehead standing out, stark and deep against the unhealthy pallor of her face.

Kate doesn’t bother to lie to her. “I took an uber,” she says, and, there it is.

Lucy fucking loses it.

The image of Kate in a fucking stranger’s car, huddled in the backseat, hiding her blood and her fear from some strange man, someone who could have taken advantage of her, hurt her even more. He must have smelled the blood, seen the clots in her hair. Lucy finds herself wanting to rip his head off; he, who was there at Kate’s most vulnerable moment, when he did fucking nothing to deserve it.

He, who was there when Lucy should have been.

The fury finds Lucy again and sweeps her off her feet, carrying her along in a wild current. She can tell that underneath the rapids are huge boulders of fear, but she lets herself skim the surface, only letting the pure rage touch her.

Oh i love this fic! This makes me happy.

This fic was from a prompt, which I rarely do these days, but it was such a great idea that it really grabbed me right away. I loved the idea of Kate being so alone that when something bad happens, she can't fathom having anyone there for her. I think a lot about living alone, being so isolated, lacking any sense of community like Season 1 Whistler did. As someone who is chronically ill and lucky enough to be married to a wonderful person, I don't have to worry about that. When I passed out in the bathroom a few years ago, she was literally right next to me, and by the time I came to she was already on the phone with 911, sat next to me for 12 hours in the ER while I waited to be seen, all that jazz. So thinking about a similar situation for Kate without a WifeZipps was really what gripped me here.

Also, random aside, the imagery of Kate waking up in the pool of her blood was inspired by an episode of Bones from the first season I think, where Bones is in New Orleans and she wakes up hurt and bleeding, alone, and she doesn't know where she is or what happened, or even if all the blood was hers. Booth flies down and is in a fucking tizzy the whole episode that someone hurt his (not)girlfriend, and so that's some of the energy I pulled into this fic.

Anyway, I wrote this fic originally as just the first chapter, just a sad Kate POV, and then I realized I wanted Lucy's response too, that maybe the meat of the fic was actually in Lucy's revelation, rather than Kate's injury.

What I enjoyed so much was playing with the POV's. In Kate's, re: the uber, all she says is: "She changes her bloody shirt, puts on a baseball hat and a jacket with a popped collar, and doesn’t give the driver a good look at the right side of her head. The drive isn’t long, but the waiting room at the hospital is full."

Meanwhile, as you posted above, Lucy says: "The image of Kate in a fucking stranger’s car, huddled in the backseat, hiding her blood and her fear from some strange man, someone who could have taken advantage of her, hurt her even more. He must have smelled the blood, seen the clots in her hair. Lucy finds herself wanting to rip his head off; he, who was there at Kate’s most vulnerable moment, when he did fucking nothing to deserve it. He, who was there when Lucy should have been."

Kate is so practical, right. "I put on a hat, it was fine." Meanwhile Lucy is catastrophizing but also much more correct, with her fear that he can see it, smell it, want to take advantage of it. Getting in an uber in the middle of the night as a woman alone is scary no matter what, and then if you're bleeding, hurt, disoriented, it's so much worse. I would be Lucy if my wife told me she took a fucking uber to the hospital with an open head wound. I would be so fucking scared for her.

I liked playing with Kate only realizing how fucking dumb that was when she sees it reflected in Lucy's eyes. And I like Lucy only realizing how alone Kate is when confronted with the matter-of-fact-ness of Kate's decision to go alone, to ride alone, to wait alone, to sleep alone, to clean up the blood alone. Kate is like, well obviously, what else would I have done? And that makes Lucy realize so many things. And I like that.

#ask zipps #zipps director's cut #alone by zipps #kate whistler #lucy tara #kacy #kacy fic

[faggot-friday]

We had an assignment in English class. Now, keep in mind that our English teacher is an absolute piece of shit. Half the reviews on our school is just people asking the principal to fire her. She called the queer community the "LBGTs". A kid was struggling with his work and she deleted it. Not in a closed-it-and-didn't-save kind of way, she actually deleted the entire document. (We can't access recycle bin on the school computers so he couldn't get it back.)

Our assignment was, in a nutshell, to write Lord of the Flies fanfic. I fucking hated that book. I'm not a big fan of classics in general (they drag on), but I especially disliked this one (mostly because of the way it was taught, but also a little bit about the ending). Specifically, we had to either rewrite the ending, or write one of the characters 20 years after the ending.

I was already an experienced fanfic writer (this was eight months ago), and so I decided I'd get an easy pass by just giving Ralph trauma, as you do. He'd killed someone, and he'd watched the closest thing he had to a friend die at the hands of his boyfriend. So I figured out what your average response to that kind of trauma is, and I wrote 800 words exactly of that. (I was very proud of having 800 words, actually.)

The day after we had all submitted it, my English teacher read out her favourites. There was three of them. I can't remember the first (sorry to whoever wrote it lol), but I remember the second. It was pretty good, written in a similar style to the actual og book. It got something like 98%, and the marks were lost because of lines like "he ran into the forest, never to be seen again". Which seemed a little harsh, but nothing more than we were used to.

And then she read out mine, and I fucking just. Died. Right there at my desk. I pulled my mask as high as it could go without being over my eyes and I tried to merge with the shitass chairs they have.

She finished reading it, and then the entire class were instructed to analyse it. We're the gifted and talented class, but half of us are neurodivergent and/or wannabe footy boys, so some of us weren't concentrating, but those who were seemed pretty happy to analyse it. This just added to my embarrassment.

So, I kid you not, they started listing all the shit that was wrong with Ralph in this fic. PTSD, survivor's guilt, it was implied he was suicidal, he was technically self-harming, so many other things I can't even remember.

I got 100%, and it was the second 100% that teacher had given out in her entire career (which is a lot of years). Fucking shocked.

TL;DR: I got a 100% on a Lord of the Flies fanfic because I took one look at the assignment and dumped a massive bucket of trauma all over Ralph.

#tl;dr #lord of the flies #tw swearing #ask to tag #i can post the actual fic if anyone wants me to #long post

[oceanwithouthermoon]

ive come to realise that i dont actually hate kubokai, i just hate the way people write them

#sorry i read like two cute in character kubokai fics and im enjoying it now #theyre cute and im a closeted shun kinnie so. obviously i will ship him with my crush from the show. #i just really really REALLY hate the super cliche seme uke dynamic people usually give them #those people have NEVER watched the show.. my boy shun is NOT like that #its sooo stereotypical and they obviously give shun the role of 'the girl' in the relationship which is. um. ew #'shun is so fragile and innocent and uwu and he needs big strong aren around at all times to coddle him' #'and aren has a soft spot for shun and shun only and only shun can stop him from being totally murderous and dumb' #do yall know that one scene from the kissing booth #where elle is like 'NOAH! LOOK AT ME! THIS ISNT YOU! LOOK AT ME' when hes about to beat the shit outta his brother #thats how kubokai gets written usually #'aren pwease nevew fight again🥺pwease? fow me?' #me reading anything kaido says in most fics: HE WOULD NOT FUCKING SAY THAT #sorry #people can write whatever they want its just. so ooc. #canon them is soooo bromance core #im sorry idk why im posting negative shit again when i like JUST said i wasnt going to do this anymore LMAO #not a callout post about anyone on here obvi- actually reading more recent fics from people on here is whats gotten me more into them #saiki k #tdlosk #the disastrous life of saiki k. #kuboyasu aren #kaido shun #kubokai #meows post

[fuzzyhairedfreak]

Okay Larian here's how you fix your reputation wrt Wyll being SO ignored by y'all's writing: Give us a fancy ball DLC that he is the star of. Let it be all about his life and his backstory, let us meet his childhood friends and enemies, let us defend his honor in a dramatic duel, let us do a fancy dance with him in front of all of Baldurian high society (whether we're romancing him or not) (seriously even the straight guys on reddit were sad they couldn't dance with him in camp without it being a romance thing). It doesn't have to be as high stakes as some other well known fantasy rpg video game's masquerade ball mission, and in fact I'd rather it wasn't. Rather than the Winter Palace, I'm looking for more of a Citadel DLC vibe if you know what I mean. Let there be some drama, a little plot to solve maybe, but mostly good party times with my friends, and getting to learn more about Wyll as a kid and teen, and Wyll telling us all the best gossip from back then. More interpersonal drama than plot. But most importantly, give Wyll romancers our the Sound of Music Maria and Mr. von Trapp showing the kids a folk dance on the patio. Give us our Pride and Prejudice (2005) no one else in the room moment. Our Cinderella and Prince Charming 'So This Is Love' scene. I'm begging

#wyll ravengard #idk if anything they do can actually fix their bs but.... they could try. and I want a ball. so. #and of course if you aren't romancing wyll you can have a romantic dance with whoever else in there somewhere #but the drama should revolve around him <3 #if anyone has written this as a fic yet link me #i can't read wyll fic yet bc i haven't finished my playthru where i'm romancing him but. for later #this has been an post #bg3

[hjemne]

Babygirl I have 38 thousand words of incomplete trigun fic spread across 8 wips and have no idea how to even start dealing with it

#this is an actual request for help #there are two im happy just to ditch entirely #3 that are p much written in complete sentences but are just AU fragments and i don't think i have the energy to turn into a proper story #ive got 12k complete and edited words for another but then i just cant work out how to get to the story's end #and then the last two are half-written half-drafted and just keep getting longer and longer and i HATE properly write up my drafted notes #just... what do i do #can I put the first three up for fanfic adoption and see if someone else knows what to make of them #if anyone wants to proof read /advise on a modern au where WW realises hes gay breaks up w Milly and falls hard for Vash who then disappears #or a post-trimax fic where knives uses the last of his energy to resurrect WW & WW relearns who he is with melanie livio and the orphan kids #(with vash angst thinking hes hallucinating WW) #or a polygun/vashwood fic where WW tries to hide his injuries & the others realise hes got strange healing bc he nearly dies before the #vial kicks in and WW+Vash then talk about EoM/Knives and it ends in a polygun snuggle pile bc they talk it thru as a crew TM #please let me know #trigun #vashwood #trigun fanfiction

[beyondplusultra]

You ever just join a fandom where you love the thing so much but most of the people in it are just so... set in their headcanons and interpretations of characters that it's useless to try and have meaningful conversations with them... Like, you leave a comment that slightly disagrees with their opinion and they take it as an attack and turn the whole thing into an argument they HAVE to win instead of just like. A discussion. Which is what I wanted to have.

It's happened three times now so I'm just going to give up interacting with meta posts for that fandom, I think.

#it's so hard because posts keep popping up and i can only shut up for so long before i want to go poking around again #i just want to know why they think that way! when it contradicts the text! like in a genuine curiosity sort of way! #but i can't even ask because if i say “this is what happened though” i get hit with the “WELL ACTUALLY” and 7 paragraphs #i can't even ask for fic recs i don't trust anyone here anymore #IGNORE ME IM JUST SALTY ABOUT NOT HAVING ENOUGH ENRICHMENT IN MY ENCLOSURE #mango talks

[synonymroll648]

sokeefitz au where keefe is a magician, fitz is his assistant (who also learned how to sword swallow just to occasionally upstage keefe at his show's because he's petty but doesn't know how to pull a quarter from someone's ear), and sophie is marella's newest friend that's getting dragged to one of keefe's magic shows and holy wow ok marella was not kidding about the magician and his assistant being hot. cue keefe pulling roses out of his sleeve for sophie midshow because he knows a cutie when he sees one (after getting a subtle okay from fitz, who is his boyfriend but most people only know about the childhood friends part). and fitz getting to know her after the curtains close and asking her if she wants to hang out sometime. and keefe crashing that meetup when it happens halfway through because he can't help himself and knows fitz won't mind.

and them becoming friends that hang out a lot outside of shows, and sophie being keefe's most reliable regular. that DEFINITELY aren't flirting, marella, c'mon, fitz leaving out scarves for her to steal at their apartment she now frequents more than her own and learning her favorite treats to bake for her and keefe constantly throwing his arm around her and complimenting her w/ ten million winks is strictly platonic in this context

#kotlc #keeper of the lost cities #kotlc fic idea #sokeefitz #sophie foster #keefe sencen #fitz vacker #it has been too long since i have posted about these fuckers considering that the brainrot never stops #also. it would be REALLY funny if sophie was a scientist. that can debunk some of keefe's harder tricks just by paying attention #actually. if anyone writes this. make her specialize in physics. so she knows a bunch of crazy shit from her classes that makes keefe go :O #additionally. for extra self indulgence on my part. keefe being genderfluid and occasionally performing a trick where he's super masc on #stage and then he's obscured for like .2 seconds and then WHABAM he is now a she and very femme would be fantastic #cis keefe works but also. transfem keefe owns my heart. transmasc keefe is great too because i can go 'just like me fr' #but also. keefe gives more transfem vibes in canon. from what i remember from canon #i could probably dream up more scenes for this au but. i just thought it would be cute #and wanted to share

[florallylly]

sometimes the happy ending is that they don't end up together

#which is true and like vague post vague post #but this is steddie coded because #why the FUCK are there so many fics of eddie munson assuming and being an asshole to steve bc of it #and disregarding his feelings or stereotyping a la the munson doctrine #and steve just takes it laying down... #and then like a bouquet of flowers or a simple apology is enough like #acshually i want them to not be together atp #like YEAH steddie but does he deserve it #not that anyone deserves or needs to deserve to be loved #but WOW does he even deserve it is questionable #like it actually gets me mad that steve so often is portrayed as just giving way and being the one to apologize #which is like kind of in character bc like YEAH he does that in canon with nancy #BUT can i just defend my stupid son here #IS IT TOO MUCH TO WANT HIM TO BE SPOILED AND DOTED UPON!!!! #while i continue to read angst

[touchlikethesun]

i have been dreaming about this one fic idea for weeks... weeks!!!!

and yet every time i open my word document i can't write a single word. i have thought thru the whole story, every emotional beat, i even have phrasing down for certain scenes after running them in my mind over and over again.

but my fingers refuse to type it out.

#help #writing is hard #maybe i'll try hand writing a draft #it's this oihina kagehina post timeskip fic #and if i can just get words to word then i think it's actually kinda an incredible story and if i get it RIGHT it will fill a void for me #because i see so much brazil/post timeskip fic but none of it is hitting exactly how i want it to #no shade to anyone at all whatsoever i just have a Very Specific Vision for these characters and their dynamics and that's no one's fault

[skitskatdacat63]

okay but Fernando IS kind of napoleon coded the minute I saw that I was like you are so right. is it the demonic short king energy??? what is it???

You guys are not prepared for the deranged Fernando-Napoleon web weaving post I'm inevitably going to make. Or should I say...Nandopoleon Alonsoparte.

No, because seriously there are way too many parallels and similarities, it's kind of insane. I was comparing quotes from s1e1 of Fernando, where his friends/family/himself are basically giving testimonials as to what he's like, to quotes from the personality/image section of Napoleon's wiki....theres so much that's practically verbatim. Just as people, as well as how they chose/choose to present themselves on a greater scale, I think is very similar. Their personality traits, their mindsets, their motivations, their goals and ways they go about obtaining that, all very similar imo.

But please, come and join me and @sweatyflytrap in the Nandopoleon brainrot, it's very disconcerting to me how well it fits!

#sorry i dont want to elaborate too much on the specifics bcs i have a post idea #but do dm me if you want me to ramble to you about the parallels #this is like a side au to my napoleonic au #im too endeared to the Hussar parallels to completely drop that #i think that is just a thing that lines up insanely well and im quite proud of it :) and i like those uniforms better #but this is like the straight up applying f1 drivers into actual historical roles #i have webbonso + strollonso ideas :DD #i want to draw fernando in one of the iconic emperor robe napoleon paintings #probably the cornonation bcs i think its very cool #like the crowing himself bcs he refuses to have anyone holding power over him so he gives the power to himself..... #but like seriously so much aligns very well and i am feeling exceedingly deranged about it #its funny bcs i usually cant read historical aus with fic and then the only content i can create is historical stuff bcs its my hobby :) #as i said to cofi ive reached the point where im comfortable enough anf settled in this fandom that my other interests start bleeding in #as i said i will begin to draft this thing bcs i am very insane abt it but feel free to dm w questions hehehe #why am i pspspspsing at you guys like cats 😭😭😭😭 #catie.asks. #catie.rambling.txt

[alwaysbethewest]

May 2022

The path is built on sand A thousand years' worth Firm and narrow directing your feet Keep going forward And there is no chance of getting lost

Flowers line both sides Pale pink bell-shaped and Fat thistles budding and So many small orange poppies Cups eagerly open to collect the fog dew

All peaceful quiet except The ocean surf below Gently crashing waves And the funny bark of elephant seals Lazing on the beach

To your right the hill crests You scramble up it Anticipating Breathless The beauty still catches you by surprise

Blue ocean and White surf and Tan beach and Grey sky Everything vast and timeless

Limitless Like the breath in your lungs

Your mind is empty But in the best way Revelatory You don't need to get high when You have this

Quail on fence posts Deer roaming where they will Cows in the road You drive past slowly And stop to stare Locking eyes with a badger For the first time in your life

This was a wrong turn But it doesn't feel wrong Knowing you would have missed The quail and the cows and the hawk and The badger with its mouse dinner caught in its teeth

If every path takes you somewhere Maybe there is no getting lost

#poetry #i never posted this because i was embarrassed by its earnestness #and because i'm not a poet #but i am so tired of my own fear of vulnerability and that my art isn't 'good enough' as if that is a real thing #i saw a tweet today that said in essence 'you are not in competition with yourself' #and it hit me hard because i have been on this kick recently #of comparing my older work with my newer work #which probably can be helpful and healthy but #not in the way i was doing it #picking apart what is better what is more popular what people respond to #anyway the point is #especially as we head into a new year #i really want to stop harping on fic stats and perfectionism and competition with myself #(much less with anyone else lol but i actually have made some strides there i think) #because all of those things stand in the way of authenticity and vulnerability and #i guess just sharing the truth of your soul and your self #which is probably ultimately the only important thing #those pieces of yourself that you share with the universe #regardless of who sees them or takes them in #regardless of the size of the audience #surely are all equal because they are all you? #so here is this #what a silly thing to hold back

[izzy-b-hands]

Was gonna sleep in. Instead woke up randomly at 5 am and have been writing a fix it steddyhands fic since then

I work in like. six hours. I have gotten maybe four hours sleep. Today is a double shift day that'll have me working bit late into the night.

This is fine.

#text post #i want to go back to sleep for a bit but #first gonna make sure i have this draft in a place i can pick it up again to finish later #get up and maybe hit the bathroom to see how my hair looks post sleep lol #to figure out if Housemate and I need to do any additional hair cutting later to even the current cut out #there's also a bunch of finale related posts i wanna reblog to my vent blog #bc those are all mostly going there now since even with anon off ppl can't behave which isn't surprising but also #god im tired can i just be allowed my complex and to my own frustration occasionally conflicting emotions abt this show #that hit literally all my special interests and mirrored my own traumas in such a huge way as to make me work on parts of myself #id previously resigned to just shoving in the box in my head #apparently the answer is no so. private vent blog gets those reblogs #and this blog will get a more neutered and rare set of reblogs abt the finale if any #and way more fix it fic and focusing on what i do still appreciate abt the show and of course me posting abt izzy lol #that's never going away lmao so if it bugs you that i still love and post abt him just unfollow and block me lmaooo #how you wouldn't have already by this point is boggling if it actually bugged anyone that much but #i digress im tired and should try and get back to sleep. maybe dream up more for this latest fic draft