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peachesofteal · 2 months

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Simple Math / Part Ten

Simple Math masterlist

Ghost/Soap/female reader 5.4k words - AO3 Warnings-tags: 18+ MDNI. Masturbation, dirty (self) talk, brief daddy kink. This fic contains mature themes. Domestic violence. Grooming. Feelings of fear and anxiety. Nurse!reader. Kissing. Lots of dialogue. Bun considers making a friend. Penny is cute. Flirting. Touching. Comfort. Bun refers to herself as "heavy". Simon is Simon. POV switch. Dinner date.

“I’m Philip.”

The handsome brunette smiles, grabbing onto your hand. You blink, trying to understand, trying to make it make sense, when he prompts you with a teasing grin. “This is the part where you tell me your name, sweet thing.”

Oh. You stumble over it, tongue tied into a million knots, sweat from the Texas sun beating down your back, sweat slicking your shirt to your skin.

He’s still holding your hand, and you’re standing there with wide, doe eyes, shell shocked.

He’s… so handsome. And older. Older, and handsome. Polished type, with good teeth and good hair. He looks like he just stepped off the golf course.

Why is he talking to you?

He glances down at your drink.

“You even old enough to be drinkin’ that?”

“I-“ You’re terrible at lying, and like he can read it on your face, he chuckles.

“You live around here?”

“I go to Rice.”

“A bit young for college, aren’t you?”

“I just turned eighteen!” You’ve heard it a million times. You’re too young to understand something, or know something, or do something. You don’t get the way the world works yet. You’re not an adult.

He holds his hands up. “I’m sorry. I bet you’re one of the really smart girls that make all us men look like Neanderthals.” Your face heats.

“N-no. I just… I graduated early. I’m not a know it all.” You defend yourself, desperate to create distance from the usual stereotype, the way most people see you. The way boys see you.

Too smart. Face buried in a book. Awkward and stiff. Uncool.

He traces you from head to toe, appreciative gaze grazing over the swell of your hips, the generous curve of your ass. “I didn’t think you were. Too mature for that, I bet.” He croons, and your knees go weak.

“Y-yeah. A lot of people say I’m really mature.”

Two things compete for your attention when you open your eyes.

One: there is a soft, lovely song playing downstairs, something spring-like and sweet, vibrant without being too loud.

Two: the house smells like pancakes.

You check your phone, shocked to see you’ve slept for yet another 12 hours. There’s a text from Nia, and a text from your boss.

>You have a lot of time accrued. Take as much as you need.

That settles that, you guess.

There are also text messages in the group chat, one from Simon, and one from Johnny, coming in only a few minutes ago.

Simon: >Penny gets pancakes on Saturday mornings. They’ll be plenty, come down and eat when you’re ready.

Johnny: >I’m missing all the good stuff.

You stretch, cautiously, wiggling fingers and toes, spreading your limbs as far as you can without pushing it too much. You’re sore, uncomfortably so, and still exhausted, but if you stay in bed any longer, you’ll rot.

In the kitchen, Simon holds Penny and a mixing bowl, alternating hands to get a whisk through the batter while humming to his daughter on her hip.

You stop dead in your tracks.

He’s… he’s not wearing the mask.

You stare at his face, his whole, naked face for the first time, taking in the broad jaw, every shiny white scar, and his (twice, if you had to guess) healed broken nose. He’s handsome, differently from Johnny but no less striking, and you can’t look away, stunned by his raw, depthless and rugged beauty. Penny’s leg has kicked up the hem of his shirt, exposing his midsection, and the flash of skin there feels like a scandal, something you shouldn’t be seeing but cannot get enough of. He looks nothing like you expected and yet… everything you hoped for.

“Morning.” Pen tucks her face into his chest shyly, peeking out from the corner of her eye, curious and cute. “Can you say good morning to bunny?” He bounces her a little, and she giggles.

"Bunny." She says quietly, and Simon laughs.

“That’s right. Good job.” After a second of silence, you try to ask him about the missing mask, but the question gets confused on your tongue, and what comes out instead is clumsy and stunted.

“Your mask.” You cringe, immediately. It’s the first thing that slips loose, insensitive, and uncouth. “I uh, I’m sorry, I’m just… surprised?” you falter, and makes it worse. You think about trying to run back upstairs, hightailing it for the hills when he smiles, and points to the empty stool at the kitchen counter with a batter covered whisk.

“Sit.” There’s already a stack piled high, plain, and ones with big, juicy blueberries. Your favorite.

“So, pancakes every Saturday?”

“Mhmm.” He settles Penny in her highchair to your left, and pulls an already cooled pancake from the stack, cutting it up into little, tiny pieces with a child’s knife and fork. “Pen and her Da,” he pads some butter across the top of his handiwork, grabbing her sippy cup and filling it with milk. “Have pancakes every Saturday when he’s home. It’s their favorite. Right?” He points at her, “your favorite?” and taps his middle finger to his chin, others outward, straight up. “Your favorite?” Signing?

“Are you teaching her sign?”

“Trying to. Pen’s birth mum is deaf. It’s important to us, that she’s able to connect with her when the time comes. Plus, my hearing is shot. So is Johnny’s. It’s a great way for her to communicate with us.” He strokes some fingers through her curls, and she doesn’t even look up, too busy shoveling as much pancake into her mouth as she can. You have a million questions now, curiosities bubbling to the surface, about Pen’s mum, about her life, about how she came to be their child. All too rude, and too invasive to ask. “Or, to use when she’s feeling sassy and can’t find the words. That happens, too.”

“She’s what…sixteen months?” You watch her intently, unable to not smile when she cheeses at her dad with a mouthful of food, even though your tender skin stings with the movement.

“Yeah. Top percentiles in a lot of things for her age. Said her first word before she was one.” He’s rich with pride, a deep well of love shining in his eyes, and you force your own down to the plate, stifling the ache bleeding from your heart.

“Of course she is.” Penny holds pieces of sticky, syrupy pancake with both hands, attacking them with vigor, smearing her cheeks purple with the squished blueberries.

You need to eat something, but your brain is buzzing, unnatural discomfort stretching long in the back of your mind.

What’re you doing? Sitting here eating pancakes like everything is normal? Like everything’s okay?

Everything is not okay.

You drift, back to your apartment, back the venom of Phillip, the hands around your neck, the twist of your shoulder, back slamming into the wall. You can still feel him, still hear him, these memories like all the others, your body beaten on the floor, mind nearly broken. Trying to shift away from the hot end of a cigarette, screaming for help, running through a-

A hand covers yours.

He coaxes the fork from your fingers, metal vibrating within flesh.

“I think… I think I should go back to bed.” You whisper.

“Are you tired?”

“No… yeah. I don’t know.”

“You don’t have to run away, you know.” He flips a pancake onto your plate from the stack. “Just because you were somewhere else for a little bit.” Your cheeks burn. “We’ve got a pretty nice couch in the living room though, if you want some time alone and don’t feel too keen on the stairs.” Saturday morning pancakes and curling up on the couch? It sounds so nice, so normal, and must show on your face, because he chuckles. “Help yourself. You might have to share the TV though, in a bit. We watch baby Einstein on Saturdays, and she’ll need some entertaining for a minute while I get ready.” Your lips twist, an entire hearth lighting up in the bottom of your heart.

“Alright.”

Baby Einstein is as enthralling as you thought it would be, though Penny disagrees. She stares at the screen, wide eyed, open mouthed, sippy cup long forgotten, and even Simon struggles to get her attention after returning from getting dressed.

You force your eyes away from the strain of his thighs in blue jeans.

“We’re goin’ down to the hospital.” He tells you, pulling her upward over the back of the couch and rubbing his nose through her curls. It’s still… weird, to see his whole face. To clearly watch his expressions, sublime bliss pushing his mouth upward whenever he looks at his daughter. “Want to come?”

“I can’t, not if I’m taking time off. It… looks bad to admin. I can probably go in at night but, during the day is just a recipe for disaster.”

“Of course.” He looks around, for what you don’t know, shoulders tensing, then relaxing. “Well, you’ve got the remote. And my number. Are you… going to be, okay? Alone?”

Say yes.

You can’t. All you can do… is nod.

“Okay well if you’re not. Just call.” You nod again, getting to your feet. Once you’re standing, you’re out of place, flailing in their living room, about to be here alone, with your memories, your poisoned mind.

What’re you doing? You’ve ruined everything. Broken all your rules.

“We can stay.” Simon steps close, hand grazing the middle of your back, and you shake your head.

“No, no- I… I’m sorry.”

“You don’t-“

“Yes, I do.” Your voice shakes, and you slam your eyes shut. You can’t do this. “I shouldn’t be here. I’m putting you in danger, and I… I’m putting myself in danger and I’m being so- so stupid, Simon.” His gaze is heavy, serious, and he steps around you, sliding Penny into her bounce seat, turning it to face baby Einstein.

“Listen to me.” As he returns, he reaches, carefully pulling you close, close enough you’re nearly in his chest, timing the rise and fall of his diaphragm. “We are safe, you are safe, sweetheart. ‘m not going to let anything happen to you, or Penny, or any of us. Alright?”

“You don’t understand.”

“Tell me.” You almost laugh, but something comes over you instead, something delirious and desperate. You lean into him, letting him hold you, hand smoothing over the back of your head. “You can tell me. You can trust us. We’ll take care of you.”

God, you want to. You want to so bad it aches, burns a ravenous fire in your heart. You want tell him, let them in. Tell them everything.

“Bun.” He murmurs, bringing you back, a finger under your chin.

“I can’t. I’m sorry, I can’t. It’s… it’s too much.”

“It’s alright.” He soothes, but doesn’t pull away, and you’re drawn in like a magnet, rising to the balls of your feet, stuck in a trance, luring you closer.

He meets your halfway.

And then-

He’s kissing you, plush lips on yours, pancakes and fresh laundry and stained-glass windows of sanctuary on his tongue.

You’re standing in the sun, in the trance of another spell.

It’s a mouthful of butterscotch and maple. Sweet, delicious breakfast in bed, lazy Saturday mornings and whispered, tender words. It’s life unlike your own, a home, the promise of a love not fractioned, chipped away, or strangled… but multiplied, magnified. His touch is painfully gentle, slow and easy, encouraging you to follow his lead, carefully constructing a tiny universe to disappear to, where shadow cannot touch. A fantasy, cocoon of stars, ambrosial and sacrosanct, an escape from the hell nipping at your heels, the hell chasing you through your dreaming and waking hours.

The anxious hum radiating through every cell in your body flatlines.

The girl in the mirror weeps.

Everything goes silent. Your breathing slows. Your hands fall to the side, listless and stunned.

Penny grunts. The moment shatters.

You can only stare with wide, terrified eyes.

“Johnny.” It’s the first word out of your mouth, the only thing you can conjure. “I’m sorry, I don’t know… I’m sorry.” Johnny. Johnny’s not here. How can he kiss you when his partner isn’t here? His heart will be broken, you’re destroying their family, you’re-

“I kissed you, bunny. Nothin’ to be sorry about.” Simon hums, still holding your face. “Johnny’s okay. He’ll be a bit jealous he didn’t get one too, but he won’t be upset.”

“How?” the question squeaks, and he takes your hand, tugging you towards the couch, settling you back into the cushions, easily guiding you with deft hands. He's so careful, so gentle, the touch of a man who raises a daughter, who loves his partner, adroit and nimble, anticipating movement before it happens.

“After Penny goes down tonight, let’s have a drink. Or some late dinner. We can talk, and I’ll answer as many of your questions as I can. How’s that sound?” He strokes a thumb across the apple of your cheek. Talking can’t hurt, can it?

“O-okay. Yeah.” You try to shrug, pain lancing through your shoulder, and you try to smother your wince. He frowns.

“I want you to get some rest today.” A small grin creeps across your face.

“You always tell people what to do?” He nods, solemn.

“It’s my job. Takin’ care of you lot is an added bonus.” He breezes by the grouping of you with his family, like it’s a normal thing, rubbing circles in your palm. “Let’s get you comfortable.”

“I can-“

“I’m here. Let me help.” You don’t say anything at first. Can’t say anything, can’t formulate a response that encompasses everything you’re thinking and feeling, stuck on the mile high wall that is your fear and denial, afraid to jump. Afraid to fall.

He doesn’t push. Doesn’t ask you to respond, He just… settles you, cautiously arranging the pillows to support your injuries, lets you sit there atop the wall, staring down at the ground where they wait. Patiently. He rubs your back and your good shoulder until you’re drifting away in heady, hazy dream world, unable to stir when he slips free, tucking the blankets in around you, and pressing another long, lingering kiss to your brow.

You wake in a panic to the doorbell ringing. Your heart races, and you’re up off the couch, tucked around a corner of the hall, hiding, in a blink, even though your shoulder and neck scream at the sudden change of position.

Breathe. You’re losing it. Philip wouldn’t ring a doorbell.

The door clicks open.

“Hello?” A woman’s voice echoes to where you’re still curled around the hallway, back pressed flat, eyes closed. “Hello? Anyone home?” Who is that?

You peek, like a child. Peering around to see a familiar woman with grocery bags in her hands, depositing them on the kitchen counter.

She spots you immediately.

“Hi!” She’s grinning, pretty and bright, pulling a carton of milk from a brown paper bag and putting it in the fridge. “I’m Lou. Sorry, did I scare you? I tried to ‘announce’ myself.” She makes bunny ears with her fingers before and after the word announce, with half of an eye roll. “John’s always telling me I have to when I come over. Can’t be giving anyone surprises, and I knew you were here. Just wasn’t sure if you’d be up for visitors. Sorry if I gave you a fright.”

“No, I…” you trail off, readjusting, giving her your name. She nods and smiles again. “I remember you. In front of the elevator that day.”

“Yeah, that was me.” She’s earnest in her focus, beaming at you, almost like she’s excited.

“You look a little different out of your cute scrubs.” That gives you a small laugh, and you smile honestly at her, flattered.

“Thanks.”

“Sorry if I’m disturbing you.”

“Oh no, you’re not. I was just… I’m fine.” She pulls a flat of eggs free and stacks them next to a colorful pile of produce.

“I do the store runs for Simon right now. It’s too much, with Johnny in hospital and taking care of Pen. We’ve been trying to lighten his load.” Guilt twists. And here you are, adding onto it.

“That’s very nice of you.” She waves it off.

“They’ve kept my husband alive a million times over. It’s the least I can do.”

“Right… they… work together?”

“Simon is semi-retired but yeah. They’re in a global task force. It’s the four of them. Have you met Kyle yet?”

“Oh, yeah. At the hospital one day.”

“Best guy, really.” Her clothes swish, warm and sweet aura practically glowing.

“Yeah, he was really nice.” She rests her hands on her hips and looks you over.

“You okay?” This woman is direct. She's got a no nonsense approach, and through intense, there's true ardor in her, passion and care.

“Yeah, I’m just… still recovering.” You don’t know what she knows, not sure what they’ve told her or John, so you’re not sure how much, or what even, to say.

“Simon told us, about you being mugged. I’m so sorry, it’s just awful.” She’s sincere in her sympathy, big brown eyes sad and considerate.

“It’s okay, thank you. I’m okay.”

“If you need anything, I’m always around. Or if you want to talk to another girl that isn’t a toddler.” It’s an olive branch of friendship, you realize, or the beginnings of, and you’re startled, considering it, wondering if it would be so bad… to have a friend.

“Thank you.” She gives you her number, and you tap it in, shooting her a text with your name.

“You should sit.”

“I can help with these.”

“No, no. No offense, but you look half asleep. I’ve got it.” You laugh even though it hurts, awkward half shrug with good shoulder, and agree.

“Yeah, I’m still recovering. It’s been slow.”

“I’m sure.” You sit at the counter, watching her organize the fridge with scary efficiency. “I’ll be out of your hair in a minute. Just had to drop these off.”

“Oh, you’re fine.” It’s nice. You’re nice. She feels safe, the proximity to Simon and Johnny naturally leading you to feel comfortable, knowing she’s welcomed by them, she’s a part of their life. It makes you feel more at ease, and you try to convey it without getting tangled up in awkward words.

You don’t know how. Not really sure how to make genuine friends anymore, so you just sit there and watch, listening to her talk, enjoying how she rambles a little bit, laughing at herself.

When she says goodbye at the door, she promises to text you the next time she’s coming by, so you’re not surprised, and you linger there, watching her go, wondering if it’s real, surprisingly mourning the loss of companionship already.

“Johnny misses you.” The ice in Simon’s rocks glass clinks together as he sips his bourbon, corner of his mouth lifting in a partial smirk. “Not too fond of his new nurse, I’m afraid. Think he’s spoiled now.”

“How is he?” You’re on the edge of your seat for an update, but not wanting to pry too much. It’s a delicate line, one where you don’t know on which side to stand.

“Good. Wrist fracture is nearly healed, so he’ll be able to start on crutches soon. Once he does, he’ll be doing physical therapy for most of his day, and ready to come home. Should be soon.” He really smiles now, and you mirror it, unable to deny the infectious bloom of happiness spreading from him to you.

“And his liver?”

“No complications. Grafts for his burn are in great shape. Hip is the trickiest part.”

“Yeah, they take a lot longer to heal, but I’m sure he’ll do a great job of it, just like everything else.”

“Thanks to you.” You sip your wine, citrusy peach and passionfruit coating your tongue. It’s a nice bottle, and you were surprised when Simon brought it home, bag of takeaway in one arm, Penny in the other.

“No.” Your cheeks heat. “I was just there. You guys did the hard work.”

“Wouldn’t have made it without you though. Think I would’ve lost it. Him too.”

“You would’ve been fine.” You brush it off, and he shakes his head.

“You’re too modest.” He drains his pour, uncapping the bottle on the coffee table between you and refilling it halfway. Glass on glass chimes, and you sink deeper into the couch, relaxing, tucking your knees up until you’re half curled into a ball, wine glass cradled between your palms.

“So…”

“I told you; you can ask me whatever you like.” You knew this was the case, but hesitance is still brimming in your heart, uneasy feelings festering beneath your skin, burning question shoving to the surface.

“Did you tell Johnny we kissed?”

“I did.”

“Was he upset?”

“Only because he feels like he’s missing out. I told him we’d make it up to him.” Fire enflames your skin. We?

“And by we you mean… us. Together. Like… the three of us.”

“I do.” The girl in the mirror screams. She doesn’t understand, why you continue to act against her better judgement. Why you’re entertaining something so, so dangerous, something so stupid.

“Simon, I… I can’t.”

“You keep saying that but look where you are, bun.” He motions to the table, takeaway cartons scattered across the top, half empty bottle of wine, his bourbon, and a baby monitor. It looks like a nice night in, a simple, sweet life, not even close to being your own.

Still, the girl in mirror combats. Still.

“This isn’t… this isn’t a thing it’s just… we’re hanging out. I’m not going to be here forever, I’m looking for a place and I-“ His face changes, flicker of shadow fading across his brow before being chased away by the sunlight in his eyes. You thought he'd be easier to read, without the mask, imagined you'd be able to place his expressions but you're just as confused and lost as ever.

“Slow down. There’s no need to look for a place to live.”

“W-what?” The wine has made you a little slow, a little sleepy, and you blink through the stupor.

“You’re still healing, sweetheart, and I know you're scared. I’ve known since the first day you stepped into Johnny’s room.”

“No.” You shake your head. Pain fizzles, numbed by alcohol, and your head swims.

“I know you weren’t mugged.” How? “I know you’re running from someone.” Oh god. The urge to get to your feet and bolt washes over you like a wave.

“I- I’m not.” The lie is bare-boned, pathetically unconvincing, and you know it. He knows it too; you can tell by the look on his face.

“You’re not ready to tell me, that’s fine. I’m patient. But you won’t be going anywhere if I don’t know you’re safe. And right now, to me, it doesn’t seem like you’re safe.” The pale yellow of your wine shines in the low lights of the living room, and you get lost in it, swirling around in his words, trying to put them together and pick them apart, desperate to understand what he means.

“Are you… are you saying you won’t let me leave?” You gulp. It’s a ridiculous conclusion, but the first one you jump to.

And in that, you know you’re giving too much away.

His face softens, and he reaches, pulling your free hand into his own, petting some sort of sequence into your skin.

“Of course not, sweetheart. I’d never, ever force you to do something you didn’t want to do. But I do want you to stay, here with us. Where we can keep you safe, take care of you.”

“I don’t need-“

“I know you don’t. I know you take care of yourself just fine.” The indignant roar in the back of your mind settles. “But I’d love an opportunity to do it instead.”

“Simon…”

“Did you know the cells in our body hold onto trauma? They carry imprints of traumatic events. It can change your biology, the way you function.” He squeezes your hand. “It’s hard to realize… that it’s not normal, the way you might be, the way you think, or do things, when you’re carrying the physical memory of terrible things.” He’s not talking about you. There’s a fleeting flash of sadness in his eyes, ghosts circling the drain around his irises, and your heart aches. “We can help you. I don’t know who you’re hiding from, but I can guess what they’ve done- look at me.” You force your eyes back to him, and he cups your cheek. “You do not have to be afraid here. You are safe with me, with us. I know you don’t believe it, and I’ll tell you as many times you need, but it will never not be true. We can help you.”

“You don’t know… you don’t know what you’re saying.” Your denial is steadfast. They cannot possibly understand.

A small seed of light blooms under darkness. It’s the sun, struggling to break free, trying to drag you into its warm, golden rays. It tugs and tugs, clawing towards you, illuminating the path forward.

The words come out before the girl in the mirror can stop them.

“You don’t know him. He’s sick and… powerful. He’s a monster but he’s smart, has connections, has ways of doing things that… I don’t even know. He’d kill you.” You clap your hand over your mouth in shock, surprised at yourself. It’s the most you’ve said about Philip in years.

You expect pushback. Expect Simon to flinch, or cower, or have good sense… a rational reaction to being told someone might try to hurt him.

He smiles instead, settling back on his side of the couch.

“I’d just have to get to him first, then.” Is he… is he? Simon watches you, reaches into your brains to peer inside, rooting around in your head. The way he looks at you, like he knows everything you’re feeling, can see what you're thinking, makes you shiver, makes you feel like you’re a tiny mouse in the shadow of a mountain. He sighs. “Give us a chance.”

“A chance?”

“A chance, to know you. Let us in, let us try. Stay here, with us, spend time with me and Johnny and Pen. No strings attached. If you decide it’s not for you… we’ll understand.”

No strings attached.

You could pick up and leave if you wanted. If you had to.

What’re you doing?

“How does it work? Would we all…” you trail off, confused.

“Date?” Simon finishes gently. “Yes.”

“So, you guys are… bi?” He chuckles.

“Yes, sweetheart. We’re bi.”

“Is this… a thing? Something you guys do?”

“We’ve never taken another partner before, no.” Your eyes widen. “You’re our first.” You don’t know why, but knowing is exhilarating and terrifying, all at the same time. You’re their first.

He’s talking about it like it’s already happened.

Fatigue settles in around you, thick fog of it draping over your shoulders and clouding your head.

“I… I don’t know.” You stifle a yawn. “I need to think.” He abandons his perch for one next to you, pulling your wine glass free and setting it on the table.

“Tired?” His fingers sweep over your cheek, skin warming under his touch.

“Mhmm.” You mumble, sleepily. Your head is very heavy, suddenly, hard to hold up.

“Alright.” He stands, bending to slide an arm under your knees, the other supporting your back in one fluid movement.

“What are you doing?” You squeak, grabbing onto him as he rises, lifting you into his chest at full height. Panic floods your nervous system, fevered tone pitching into a plea. “Put me down! I’m too heavy. Please, I’m too heavy, you can’t-“

“I’ve lifted a car off a teammate before.” He tells you, the thick of his body beneath your ear vibrating. “And I’ve dug Johnny out of a collapsed concrete wall. I’m made to pick things up, bunny. Heavy or not.” He holds you right there, all the way up the stairs, down the hall to the guest room, before settling you back on your feet, big hands around your waist for balance. Your back is to his chest now, and his nose drifts across the top of your head, slow path of his fingers stroking down your hip. “Alright?” He asks, and you nod, throat too dry to speak.

He squeezes. You stifle a gasp, resist the urge to press your thighs together.

It’s been so long since you’ve been touched, since anyone has handled you with reverence, with affection. You almost don’t recognize it.

His hand drifts, slipping between your thigh and cheek. “This okay?” He murmurs, and you manage a rough yes, word sticky and thick in your throat. Yes. Yes, don’t stop. A fingertip strokes along the crease there, back and forth, before trailing upward. He takes as much of your flesh in his palm as he can, squeezing again, caressing, mouth skimming along your neck.

“Oh.” you breathe. The room is warm, barely lit by the bedside lamp, and you burn in the dark, sensations sparking alive that have long laid dormant.

The girl in the mirror curses you.

“Need help getting to bed?”

“N-no.” Yes! “I’m… fine.” His lips touch your cheek, then your ear, breath blowing over you, firm, solid warm mass at your back exhaling shakily.

“Get some sleep.” He steps away, but not before he swings, slowly, softly, into the pillow plush of your ass. It’s a gentle tap, but the fire between your legs roars. “Goodnight, bun.”

“G-goodnight.”

Simon's got his sweatpants and boxers off before he's even fully in the bathroom, running right into the shower, hand wrapped around his throbbing cock as the water flicks on. It's not hot enough, but he doesn't even notice, cock heavy in his grip, tip already smeared wet with pre-come.

"Fuck, bunny." He grits, trying to stay quiet but unable to hold his tongue.

He's awful, for this. Awful for doing this after you've had such an emotional night. Awful for touching you when you're still healing, awful for grabbing a handful of your ass and imagining sliding his dick through the space between those cheeks. He can't stop, strokes himself long, squeezing the base and pulling up and back as he imagines you on all fours, perfect globe perked up in the air for him, his cock sinking into your soaking wet pussy as you moan. He knows you would make the prettiest sounds for them, sweet gasps and cries, bouncing on Johnny's cock in his lap.

"Hop like a bunny." He'd coo, and you'd whine, riding Johnny as Simon coached you until you were so close, almost there on the edge. "Show daddy how bad you want to come, little bunny."

He jerks himself harder, eyes closed, imagining the ripple of your flesh, the way you'd bounce so perfectly, how Johnny would be gripping your hips with his head tipped back, throat exposed for Simon to nip and suck a mark into.

His bunny. His boy.

His toes curl. Water streams down his back, slicking his skin, forearm burning with each stroke, imagination running wild as he gets closer and closer, thinking about you and Johnny and him together, finally, your legs spread wide in front of their faces, perfect pussy on display. He can almost hear the way you'd whisper their names, and it blinds him, fills his head with white light. He knows you're beautiful when you come, as beautiful as you are when you let your guard down and give him a real smile, as beautiful as you are everyday, so pretty and perfect, kind, even as a ghost. He imagines it, pictures it, the sight of his and Johnny's come leaking out of your hole, fingers shoving it back inside, marking you as theirs.

He comes with your name on his lips, a strangled whisper, painting the tile with himself.

He falls asleep with a new addition in their bed, on top of Johny's t shirt and the baby monitor... there's now a long sleeved tee, plucked from your dirty laundry this morning as he was getting ready to leave. It smells like you, something he wishes he could bottle, and he holds it close, tied in tandem with Johnny's, curled in his arms on top of the pillow.

#simple math #peaches writes #ghoap x reader #ghost x reader x soap #simon riley #john mactavish #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley #simon ghost riley x reader #john soap mactavish #soap x reader #ghost x soap #if you saw my technical difficulty earlier no you didn't!

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katz-chow · 8 months

Note

any thoughts for pervy könig? i know he'd be so gross amd clingy, constantly stealing panties and huffing at them :( or watching you across from the showers, fisting his leaky cock and making eye contact with you :(

i bet he'd be stalk you 'nd everything !!! being so creepy and openly desperate :(

ignore this if you're uncomfortable !!

warnings: nsfw, gn! reader, pervy, toxic, power play, corruption kink, stalking, somnophillia, not proofread :D

all the things that lead up to that though, waiting and stalking you to see your reaction to everything hes doing.

him purposely putting a hand on your lower back to walk past you, his large hand traveling a bit too far down until you feel a squeeze on your ass

the next time he does it, you quickly arch into his grasp and look at him with those doe eyes of yours, all innocently. from then on, he knows how cheeky and desperate you are

always teasing you by making you go shower last, saying he needs some…help with paperwork. you always agree because he’s your superior!! why wouldn’t you??

ends up with the both of you in the empty showers late at night, you rubbing the soap down your body with the open curtains, allowing him to lean back on the benches by the lockers to feel his pants tighten, your freshly worn underwear in his hand.

by the time he finally pulls his stiff, leaky cock out, he can’t help but use your underwear to jerk him off :( it’s the closest thing he’ll allow himself to you, you’re just so young and precious!!

will keep your cum stained underwear to “wash for you”. you ended up never seeing them again…along with a few other pairs

pervy konig who sneaks into your room while you’re asleep using his rank to get the master key. he sits there kneeling on the floor next to your bed as he sniffs your hair and your musk, skin shiny with a thin layer of sweat from your sleep

he inhales your scent and just like that, he leaves his own potent one, cumming on your sheets…or if he’s feeling rather possessive, he’ll grind against your arm or hand until he cums all over you

pervy konig who grinds up against your ass when you’re both supposed to be focusing on a debrief, but he doesn’t care, it could’ve been an email. not his fault you’re standing next to him, your smell just turns on something feral in him

making you go into parade rest, your hands behind your back to grope and touch his growing bulge while no one dares peep a word about him grinding and grunting in the back of the room, he’s their superior too!! why would they risk getting in terrible trouble? especially harsh when someone that’s not him making you embarrassed

pervy konig who thigh fucks you, rarely ever allowing his dick to your oh so needy parts, slick dripping down your thighs and mixing with his own precum. when he thinks you’re doing particularly good, hell intentionally slide higher and rub against you, making you tremble and moan, edging you and denying. it leaves you all needy, allowing him to do all the pervy stuff just for the chance that he might authorize you to cum

“you’re too good for me, schätzelein…can’t stand ruining you yet…”

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xanaxspritz · 2 months

Text

𝙙𝙖𝙙𝙙𝙮 𝙡𝙚𝙨𝙨𝙤𝙣𝙨 ♡

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚𝙖𝙠𝙖 𝙛𝙪𝙘𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙗𝙤𝙮𝙛𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙣𝙙'𝙨 𝙙𝙖𝙙˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

cw: bf!megumi, college AU, cheating, breeding, possible impregnation, cowgirl

an: I put cw here for a reason, so if this work makes you uncomfortable in any sort of way or if you're a minor, please do not interact. this is a work of fiction and what i write here does not reflect my own values or experiences.

ʚ♡ɞ˚

megumi was a sweet boyfriend. he sent good morning texts daily, was always ready to drop everything if you were in need across campus, and even warmed up to pda because you liked it so much. you couldn't ask for anything better.

but his father was a different story. undeniably a dilf, you couldnt help but to stare at the way his arms bulged out of his compression shirt he always wore, hugging his torso just right to show off his abs. you couldnt but to take a peak at his lap when lounged in grey sweats, watching TV with his legs spread wide open, as if he was daring you to take a seat on top.

it didn't help that he would stare at you, every time you visited megumi at home. the heat of his eyes lingering a bit too long on you heated up something dark within you.

the tension between you and toji kept rising and rising, until one day you went to the fushiguro residence to retrieve something you left. you find toji in the kitchen, eating his lunch, his lips curling up into a smirk when he sees you.

"megumi ain't here you know" he says food still in his mouth.

"i know. just forgot something," you say nervously.

"was it this?" he takes out neon pink panties from his pocket. you are mortified.

"oh my god. im so sorry mr. fushiguro. i promise i'll never-"

"always knew you're a little slut. i can always tell with little girls like you"

"what? what do you mean?" you feel your face grow hotter.

"don't pretend like you aren't, " he chuckled. "always teasing me with those super short skirts barely covering your ass. i can even see your pushup bra through your shirt." you cross your arms instinctively. "i didn't think megumi had it in him," he continued. "but it seems like you've got him wrapped around your finger."

you were speechless. was mr. fushiguro actually hitting on you?

"tell me doll, is he good enough for you? is he fucking you right?"

by this point toji rose up from his chair, inching closer to you until youre back up on the kitchen counter. you can something on the side of your thigh.

"y-yes mr. fushiguro, he's a great boyfriend. i-i couldn't ask for any better," the wetness you can feel in your panties betrays your words.

"hm, is that so?" his hands wandering behind you to squeeze your plump ass. he snaps your panty band before feeling up between your legs.

"already wet f'me you dirty slut," leaning down closely to your, lips centimeters apart. "how naughty."

you crash your lips into his desperately, weeks of sexual tension building up to a make out session. his lips are surprisingly soft, and his breath is a comforting smell of tobacco. "call me toji," he nuzzles into your neck.

one thing turns into another and you found yourself in the master bedroom, bouncing on top of toji's huge cock.

"that good baby, keep riding me just like that," he whispers slapping and grabbing your ass. "i bet he doesn't fuck you like i do, ain't that right?"

"n-no mr. fushiguro!"

"i thought I told you to call me toji," he narrowed his eyes, picking up the pace faster.

your moans get louder as his thick, fat cock pounded you. his heavy balls slapped against your ass, you close your eyes in pure bliss, your tits bouncing in his face.

"i wonder what would happened if i filled you up with this daddy dick. think megumi would notice you pregnant with my baby, hm?"

the thought of toji cumming in you was exhilarating, you quickly nod your head yes, holding him tighter as he digs his fingers into your hips.

he laughs at your eagerness. "figured a little whore like you would love it. fuck- are you ready?"

you feel his warm cum filling you up as toji grunts. his load is thick and creamy, the excess dripping down your thighs.

he quickly replaces his cock with his fingers, plugging the cum inside you, keeping you nice and full.

"you're a good fuck," he sighs. "no wonder megumi keeps you around."

right, megumi. how would you even begin explaining to this to him? should you even tell him? the overwhelming guilt consumes your thoughts.

toji notices the visible worry you're sporting on your face. "hey doll, don't worry. I'm not gonna tell him," he reassures. "as long as you don't either. just keep coming back when he's not home so I can cum inside that pretty pussy again."

#jjk smut #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen toji #toji smut #jjk toji #toji fushiguro #toji x you #toji x reader #toji x female reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader

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enhafilthandfiction · 2 months

Note

ok hear me out (yall have a bet) imagine mutual masturbation with jake, but the one that cums first has to give the other a head.. regardless of the winner j@ke ends up eating you out

Dumb Games - Jake Sim

A/N : Hello everybodyy I. am. back. (after being dead for like 345 months). Anyways, just wanted to say that I missed you all sm! <3 I hope you are all doing well and ready to enjoy reading this fic! Anon tysm this is such a good idea oml esp with bff!Jake 🤭

Pairing : Bff!Roomie!Jake X Fem!Reader

Warnings : Kinda pervy and desperate Jake, mutual masturbation, oral (f.rec), dirty talk (bc cmon it's Jake), panty smelling (sry), some fingering and I think that's it :))

Word Count : 1,268 Words

Masterlist

It was a normal day for you, laying in bed, reading, scrolling through Pinterest, studying, until-

"Y/n? What is thisss?" your roommate's tone which echoed through the corridor told you he was up to some mischief. You lift your head up curiously as he stumbles into your room, your expression quickly changing when you notice what he's holding. "Jake!" you yelp, rolling out of bed to chase after him.

"I didn't know you owned a pink dildo" he lets out amazed, looking back at your tired figure which was still running after him. He giggles and escapes to the living room, settling on the couch as you follow.

"Oh and it vibrates too!" he exclaims in awe.

"Yeah, now give it back" you breathe, trying to catch your breath.

"Nah, come get it" he lifts his arms up and you scurry to get your personal object back, climbing on his sitting figure as you reach for it, but his arms were too damn long.

"Jake, please, just give it back" you sigh, giving up. You don't even realise you're pretty much straddling him in the position you're at until you feel his other hand on your arm.

"How about we make a deal?" he asks, a playful smirk on his face. "last person to make themselves cum wins"

You deadpan at him "Are you kidding?" you ask in a simple tone.

"Nope, and the loser has to finish the other off" he adds, looking at you hopefully. "Plus I'll give you this back so you can use it in the meantime" he shakes the pink object in his hands, flicking his brows up and down.

You've always kinda liked Jake, he was funny and unserious and just your type. But he was also the person you pretty much grew up with. You were scared to lose such a friendship so you never actually made a move. This was your chance.

You roll your eyes in faux annoyance "Fine. You're gonna be the one cumming too quick anyways. We'll see how good you can give head." you shrug, giving him a pretty smile "Now give me my damn dildo back"

He laughs and places the plastic dick in your waiting hand, before looking up at you, smoothing his hands down your sides. You looked so pretty like this on him, he couldn't wait to see you pleasuring yourself.

You get off him too soon, finding your place at the other end of the big couch, spreading your legs as you snake a hands between them. "Fuck" he curses under his breath, his already-hardened cock twitching in his uncomfortable pants.

He also leans back on the opposite end of the couch, quickly untying the stings of his sweats and sliding them down impatiently along with his briefs. His cock springs out, the angry red tip already leaking precum.

You bite your lips at the sight of him, wondering how he'd feel inside you. One thing's for sure; that pink plastic dick wasn't half as good.

You get comfortable, rubbing your clit through you shorts. "Show me that pussy" he instructs, slowly stroking his shaft. You blush red, smiling at his impatience. Nevertheless, you lift your hips up and slide the shorts down along with your panties which you knew were soaked.

Jake didn't hesitate to grab the black material, bringing it to his nose and inhaling deeply. You roll your eyes and sigh at his pervy behaviour. "Jakeee" you whine "That's dirty"

He doesn't seem to care, groaning at your smell and at the sight of you. "Fuck you're glistening" he points out, licking his lips as he speeds up his pace a little. #

You spread your juice around, circling your hole, closing your eyes at the tingling sensation. His lips almost start to draw blood at the way he's biting them, his hand going up and down his cock quicker.

He can't help the way his eyes are fixated on you, watching your expressions and your fingers touching yourself. He knows he's gonna lose the second you put a finger inside yourself, squeezing his base to calm himself down.

You open your eyes to stare at his, as if in a challenging manner, the sounds of your gushing juices fills the room, his curious eyes looking at where you finger yourself.

"Close Jakey?" you ask in a breathy voice which goes straight to his dick.

He breathes in "N-no" he lets out, his shaky voice betraying him. He can't help himself though. You want him to lose, adding another finger to your tight hole and moaning out loud.

He's done for when you purposely moan out his name, sending him into a frenzy, his eyes roll to the back of his head and before he knows it, his hands are drenched in cum.

You sigh at him "I didn't even get to use my dildo" you faux pout when he slowly opens his eyes, recovering from his orgasm.

"You won't need it" he mutters, getting off the couch and making his way to you. He grabs your thighs and positions you so that you're sitting comfortably on the couch. He doesn't waste a second to sink down on his knees, spreading your legs as he takes you in.

"So fucking hot" he whispers under his breath. He's been waiting to taste you for so long. Smelling your panties just made him more impatient. You nod at him when he looks up at you from between your legs and he dives in.

He flattens his tongue and licks up your folds in one go, immediately humming at your taste. He laps up your juices, swirling his tongue around your hole before slightly prodding it in just to tease you. His licks his way up you clit, kitten-licking the little nub sending tingles up your spine.

"Fuck Jake" you breathe out, subconsciously grasping his hair between your fingers. You push his head deeper into you, encouraging him to suck at your clit. He hums at the little tugs on his hair, the pleasurable sting going to his dick.

He licks back to you hole, his nose bumping against your clit, making you whine out. You can't help but close your thighs around his head, engulfing him into you. He brings his hands up to your thighs, keeping them open before he brings one hand to your hole.

You feel like you're going to explode with his finger prodding at your hole and his tongue on your clit, the stimulation becoming too much. "Fuck, fuck r-right there" you moan out, pulling at his hair to ground yourself.

The way he hums against your folds doesn't help, your hips twitching at the feeling. He starts finger fucking you at a quicker pace, his mouth still working on your clit. All it takes is one last suck on your sensitive clit before your squeezing around his finger and tipping your head back in pleasure.

He eagerly licks up your essence before you push his head away due to overstimulation. You catch your breath as he sits up and settles on the couch next to you.

"Hate to admit it but that was one of your best ideas, Sim" you chuckle out, still in a haze.

"I never come up with bad ideas dumbass" he replies, also chilling back into the couch, allowing you to rest your head on his shoulder.

"We should play this dumb game again sometime" you suggest, trying to place a hint.

"Damn you liked it that much didn't you?" he asked giggling

"It's always nice seeing you lose your own game"

Hi again, thankyou for reading to the end :D I hope you enjoyed it !! Have a good day/night and remember that ily! <333

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missroki · 3 months

Text

JJK MEN BEING GIRLFRIEND STEALERS ┊ TOJI. NANAMI. GOJO. GETO.

content: female reader × multi jik, black girl friendly, cheating, piv sex, vaginal fingering, implied sex work, car sex, reader is called pretty, good girl, whore, darling, pretty girl, and baby.)

TOJI’s strong grip tightens around your thighs, his hands unbearably warm against your chilly skin. he lifts you languidly, easing his cock inside of you at an easy, smooth pace. he’s being… nice — gentle, even.

he hasn’t seen you in a while, after all. he figures you deserve something real sweet for coming back to him so eagerly. the ac of the car makes your skin pebble with goosebumps but you ignore it to accept your lover’s slow, succulent kisses.

“hey,” he murmurs, his hold loosening to press against your back, stopping his movements. “you alright, darlin’? i saw you shivering–“ your lips press back against his, your hands moving to the base of his neck and tugging on the dark black tresses. you need him to fuck you, to take your mind off the guilt you feel everytime you do this with him.

toji doesn’t protest, a gentle smirk you feel against your mouth. you ignore the way your heart seems to flutter at his concern, instead focusing on the heat of his cock inside of you, the burn in your thighs as you bounce faster on his lap.

“huh? so eager today. i bet your little boyfriend gives you all the sweetness you need, yeah? that why you want me to grab your hair and fuck you like a whore in his car?”

a large palm settles on the top of your head, pulling you in close. his hands feel so good, make your mind feel dizzy enough to almost ignore his words.

toji’s hand presses but never tangles in your hair, his other gripping your ass cheek to lift you easier on his lap. he is still gentle, not giving in to what you want. what you need. “toji…” you whine, almost embarrassed when he laughs against your hair.

“alright, pretty girl. you win. get in the back so we can leave him a big surprise, yeah?”

NANAMI kento is a good man. he is kind with a strong conviction, a pillar of what would be deemed the perfect partner in most of society’s book. you know that he would make you happy, make you feel safe and secure and loved. but it wasn’t enough. you couldn’t leave your boyfriend, not now. not ever... but what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.

especially when kento fucks you this good, a mess of limbs in the sheets, muscles tense as you grip onto the edge of the mattress. hot, wet kisses are left on your neck and shoulders, intense and possessive as your braids hang off the edge of the bed. sweat causes your baby hairs to curl ever so slightly on your forehead.

every thought topples out of your mind when he gets like this, the smell of sex more intense than the candle you lit only a few minutes before his arrival. his cock plunges in and out of you at a record breaking pace, deep strokes that have you mewling against your arm – his thick length keeping you nice and full as his hips snap into your ass.

you reach behind you to caress his cheek, but your lover pins in back into place, fingers interlocked with yours.

“no, don’t move,” he grits out, “want to watch you take it like a good girl.”

you can’t help the whimper that leaves your mouth. it is a moment of weakness when the words rush from you. “fuck, kento i love you. i love you, baby. please please please!”

you can’t say you don’t feel guilty, but you’ve spent enough time with nanami kento to know he wouldn’t be too keen on being the other man. the way his hips falter and his arm moves to wrap around your waist is telling. he presses his face between your shoulder blades. “i love you too, sweetheart. missed you so much while you were gone.”

you had left to make your appearance as your boyfriend’s doting arm piece, having to leave the country to fulfill your duties. what nanami doesn’t know won’t hurt him either, and that includes the expensive engagement ring tucked in your clutch.

your face feels flushed, gaze lowering because you’re unable to meet the ravenous expression on his face. it’s way too intimate this way, GOJO is your best friend, after all. or, at least he was before all of this.

when he fucks you, it’s hard to remember where you begin and where he ends; sneaking around for months into empty rooms while your boyfriend sat in waiting only a few doors down.

it was always at these expensive dinner parties that he wanted to snatch you away, as if making a game of how fast he could make you cum and get you back before suspicions grew.

you’d only just started but his fingers fuck you with purpose, your dress pooling around your waist as he lifts your leg to wrap around his hips. you imagine that he feels the way you buck into his hand and grip his dress shirt with just enough pressure to not add wrinkles. “satoru,” you moan, as quietly as you can, “w-what if he comes in here? what if he sees us–“

“let him,” he muses, lifting the hand on your thigh so that it grips your chin. he presses closer to keep you in place and you feel his fingers move deeper inside your tight hole, “might as well get it over with. i can call him now if you like?”

you feel a surge of panic, thinking it best to push your lover away and go back to the party… but the heat in your belly is much more convincing. your eyes flutter as they stare into a brilliant shade of blue. “you’re awful,” you respond, breathy and docile against his touch.

it’s confusing. gojo fucks you like he loves you, like he desires you because it’s you. his fingers are long and unrelenting, the evidence of your arousal drips onto his palm as his thumb rubs your clit in hurried strokes. “you like it, that’s why you’re gonna cum for me, right? make a mess in his study?” he seems positively elated at this revelation while you pretend not to enjoy it as well.

“cum nice and hard for me, baby. want you to feel good with just my fingers.”

to muffle your moans, you press your mouth into his crisp white dress shirt. you realize all too late that your red lipstick will stain the fabric… but the idea of you leaving him in your marks, sends you over the edge, your tongue pressing against his shoulder and your legs shaking.

you smile at the sound of his belt unbuckling.

GETO moves in a mindless sort of way, his cock throbbing hotly inside of you with every shudder of breath you let out. he doesn’t move, just plugs you full of him while his fingers rub your clit in slow, steady strokes. “just relax, baby.” he had said. “i’ll make you feel better than he ever could.”

it wasn’t a bluff, either. even with his cock simply nestled inside of you, the feeling of his fingers is better than anything you’d experienced with your boyfriend. sparks shoot down your legs and back up to your chest. your legs are spread so wide that if anyone were to come in they’d be able to see every dip and curve of your nakedness.

you whimper as his other hand comes up to pinch your nipples, sucking on the skin of your neck with the same gentle but firm touch. you can’t help but melt into his lap, to helplessly gush all over his cock and reach back to tangle your hands into his soft dark hair.

“you smell good,” he murmurs against your skin, “so sweet. like candy.”

“it’s coconut.” you respond, your mind hazy enough to be so loose-lipped. “my boyfriend chose it.”

geto chuckles, pinching your nipple just a little bit harder as punishment. “talking about another man while i’m inside of you. have you no shame?” you know he doesn’t care, that it turns him on even more when he twitches inside of your heat.

the teasing makes you preen. “he likes it when i fuck you, says it makes me nice and wet for him.”

“huh. is that so?” you nod.

geto suddenly lifts you and a gasp leaves your lips, the feeling of him moving feels foreign after cockwarming for so long. he grips your thighs now, lifting you up and down on his length in deep, slow strokes. “guess i should give you your money’s worth then. make sure i plug you full so he can taste me later.”

MISSROKI. all original work. do not plagiarize, translate, or repost. this includes feeding my work to ai apps and sites.

#‧₊˚ 🖇️ ۫ ⭒ — sorin writes.#gojo x reader #toji x reader #nanami x reader #geto x reader #gojo x female reader #toji x female reader #nanami x female reader #geto x female reader #gojo smut #toji smut #nanami smut #geto smut #jjk x reader #jjk smut #jjk headcanons

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nerak-01 · 8 months

Text

imagine konig x ghost x reader (SMUT/NSFW minors be warned!)

Konig is fucking you so roughly after a long mission. His thrusts are intense, but they were never rushed. It was like he was trying to savor you for himself tonight. You can feel his death grip on your hips while one hand trails up to gently tease your nips.

"Fuck, just take it slut. It's all you're good for, f-fuck." Konig's breath staggered as he quickened his pace.

You must be on sensory overload because you feel your eyes tear up as they roll back. It was hard enough to breath with the black and white skeleton mask covering your face. Ugh, it smelled like sweat and so much more like Ghost.

"Y-Yeah, I bet that stupid thing smells like him, huh? My pretty baby getting turned on?" His answer came with the way you immediately tightened around him.

"Just like that, ugh, I bet you'd love it if he came to find it, huh? He could be watching right outside that fucking door. Seeing the rookie being bent over like a total whore. He could see how soaking wet you get when you think about him...S-shit! Baby, not so tight. You want me to pull out, don't you?" Konig's hips jutted and he tilted your chin toward the doorway.

You forced yourself to focus on the door, and how you wish you could turn the other way. The entry way was cracked open just enough for you to make out unmistakable brown orbs and a hulking masculine figure. Fuck, you were caught.

Simon smirked when you made eye contact. He brought his finger to his lips, hushing your panic. Ghost watched as Konig's cock continued to drill into you. He got a delicious view of your holes from the mirror behind Konig. A part of him wanted to push open the door and stuff his stiffy between your cheeks. Shit, what he'd do if he didn't have such self control.

"Princess, I know you're close, c'mon. I know you got one more for me," Konig groaned.

You could only pathetically moan and whimper as Konig bullied his thick cock within your perfect walls. Knowing Ghost was watching made you even wetter. There was so much slick connecting your two bodies. Ooh~ you felt so delirious.

#call of duty #simon riley x reader #könig x reader #konig smut #könig call of duty #fanfic

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cherryredstars · 2 months

Note

Hi cherry!!! I love your writing so so much, you're one of my fav authors ❤

I was wondering if you'd be interested in doing a part 2 for accessories? Bc oh lord 🥵 I just know Miguel loves spoiling his baby with jewelry and all his attention

Maybe they go out shopping or on a date and someone starts trying to hit on reader, so ofc he gets all jealous and possessive bc can't they read? They're literally wearing Miguel's name around their neck, and someone has the audacity to try and take his baby from him?

They go home and Miguel puts their collar on, just to remind them who they belong to 🥰🥰🥰

Pairing: Miguel O'Hara x gn!reader

Warnings: 18+, NSFW, Penetrative Sex, Collars, Possessiveness, Mentions of Obstructed Breathing

A/N: Thank you so much, love!! I hope this lives up to your expectations!!!

Not Edited

Part 1

It's warm, no, hot.

Maybe it's because of the pillow, face pushed down by his large hand to the point where air just barely manages to filter through your partly unobstructed nose. Or maybe that's what's causing this dizzy, muffled feeling in your head. That, paired with the delicious pressure of leather against your neck, the cold tinges of metal skimming against your skin every now and then. It just feels so good, even with Miguel whispering horrible things in your ear. Things that don't really land and you only reply to with snuffed out moans that cause the white pillows to go grey with saliva.

Maybe he's saying something about you being his, or maybe something about teaching you who you belong to, or how he's the only one who can get you dumb on cock. Who knows? Does it matter? Surely not. Not when the only thing that's getting through your mind is just how amazing it feels to have the heaviness of his dick stretching you wide. Not when your eyes are rolled back with how forceful his pelvis meets your ass, making your body shake with the force and speed of it. Not when your hands are gripping so hard onto the sheets that they might rip because you don't know how to handle all the pleasure circling through your body.

It's just so good that you really don't care what Miguel is saying, can't even process it.

But he wants you to hear him. It's obvious from the way the hand pressing your head down into his pillows is now wrapped around your neck, pressing the leather further into your skin as he forces your head up. You gasp as your neck is forced in a slightly uncomfortable position, air fully filling your lungs and cooling the saliva wetting your chin. Miguel's nose is pressed into your cheek, the musky smell of sex, sweat, and his spicy cologne invading your senses. He doesn't once stop the moving of his hips, the large cock inside your tiny hole still dragging against your walls.

"Bet he wishes he could even get the chance to make you so stupid on cock like this, huh? Bet ya' don't even remember his name though, yeah?"

You don't even know who he is, can't remember anything past Miguel dragging you into the bedroom after your date. And even that is getting hazier with each of his rough thrusts. Surely it couldn't be that important, right? So you only moan out, back arching as your eyes look towards the ceiling. Miguel chuckles, mumbles something against your skin that you don't catch over your own moans and skin slapping. The rapid beginnings of a pleasurable ache in your stomach is all you can comprehend, choked moans and gasps parting from your lips until they form a loud wail of Miguel's name.

Miguel curses behind you, his hips not stilling even after your orgasm causes tremors in your body. You let out a pathetic whisper as blunt nails scrape the nape of your neck as Miguel's hand grabs hold of your collar from behind, like you're an out of control dog who looks ready to run off at any moment. He pulls you back, practically forcing your body upright against his sticky skin. His hot breaths fan over your ear, and his teeth are gritted in a groan as he spills hot seed inside of you.

"That's right, cachorro. That's who you belong to."

478 notes · View notes

2neaky · 7 days

Text

Any Means Necessary.3

Stalker!Ony x Black!Reader

Onyankopon's growing obsession with Y/N, a young woman he happened to stumble upon in his city, leads him to a spot right outside of her bathroom window. He's a peeper, but he's got no shame.

Part 1, Part 2

7.5k words! Not rlly edited

Warnings: MDNI, nonconsensual stalking, nonconsensual m*sturbation to Y/N (Y/N is unaware of it), obscene & highly descriptive language, explicit s*xual content, mention & use of a s*x toy, an*l & an*l play, p*netration (p in v), dubious consent, breathplay, slight possessiveness, c*rvix kissing, an unrealistic amount of fluids (or maybe it is realistic, who knows), unprotected s*x (don't do this), use of outdated term "clean" to describe the status of one's s*xual health

Banners by @rookthornesartistry & @chaeneuu

Tag list: @simpingfor-wakasa @ciaqui

Snowfall started around eight o’clock, and it’s far too dark for anyone to be outside at this time.

And that’s good.

The darkness makes it easier to hide.

For too long, Ony had thought of how he would make his way into her house. He’s played it over in his head so many fucking times he could do the plan with his eyes closed.

He heads straight for the back door, his decided entrance into the condo.

The lock is simple, far too easy to pick. Its click brings a jovial look to his face in the darkness.

He pushes the door open carefully, slinking into the dark house like a shadow.

His heavy boots land on the door mat placed at the door. Smart enough not to track the snow inside, he toes them off.

The nylon material of his jacket risks him being heard before being seen. And that simply can’t do.

The low whine of the zipper sounds until the jacket is fully open. He shrugs off the coat, letting it pool on the ground near his snow-crusted shoes.

Now, only in a shirt and sweats, he looks just like he lives here. Belonging with her.

His chest swells with a large inhale. Her home has a soft, powdery sweet scent.

He’s never gotten close enough to smell her. He wonders if she smells like her home, too, or if she has her own individual scent that depends on which perfume she chooses for the day.

Another thing he notices—the relative quietness of the home.

No pets either.

They would have sniffed him out by now or barked once they heard the intrusion.

But, he keeps still anyway, trying to source out any other sounds.

What he does hear is distant, playing softly; Music.

She’s upstairs.

In the dark, he makes out the staircase over near the front door. The condo is a fairly new construction. What are the chances of her having creaky steps already?

He’ll have to test them out now, won’t he?

With caution, he mounts the stairs. As he climbs, he considers the possibility of getting caught for the first time ever.

He isn’t really scared. If after all this time, Y/N hadn’t realized that she was being stalked, he has nothing to fear.

Reaching the top of the stairs, Ony surveys the dark hallway. The music has gotten louder.

No wonder she didn’t hear him come in.

The floors don’t creak either as he walks, yet he remains careful.

It isn’t hard to find her; Light spills through a crack in the doorway of room much further down. The music continues to increase in volume as he nears it.

He’s quiet as he saddles up to the crack in the door. Hidden by the darkness, he takes his chance to peak inside: Sitting at the foot of her bed, Y/N stares down at a pink box in her hands.

A champagne colored, satin robe covers her body, but it’s slipping. The front is more open than it should be, giving him sight of her deep cleavage, all the way down to just above her navel. One leg crossed over the other, the expanse of her thigh is exposed.

Her skin is shiny and smooth. And her hair is under a scarf.

She just did her nightly routine, he’s sure of it. Her face is gleaming with serums and all the other shit women like her tend to use in their elaborate skin care routine.

His cum on her face would have the same effect. In fact, he’ll bet that it’ll look even better.

Y/N continues to stare down at the box, nibbling on her bottom lip in thought. The moment of contemplation lasts only a minute more before she decides to open it up.

His eyes fall to the ground, seeing the empty black gift bag at her feet and the pink tissue paper strewn around.

If Ony didn’t look back up in time, he would have missed her pulling it out of the box; A decently sized, fairly girthy dildo.

He almost chokes on his own air.

Y/N discards the box in the same fashion she did the gift bag. Her soft pink frenchies frame the toy perfectly. YA perfectly chosen color. Her fingers don’t even wrap all the way around it.

It’s looks almost like his. He has half the mind to think she was actually stalking him.

Nevertheless, the all too realistic design makes it easier to imagine her holding him instead. The thought sends his blood rushing south.

She stands from the bed to head into the connected bathroom. He licks his lips, watching the way her ass moves with each step underneath her robe.

He can hardly hear the running of the faucet over the music. A minute or two passes before it’s shut off and she reemerges from the bathroom.

Her robe has slipped further down, the belt virtually untied at this point. In her hand, the toy drips with water. She rests it on the bed side table, standing upright.

She pulls at the remaining inch of the belt and he watches her robe falls open like it’s nothing. For a second, the only thing exposed is her pussy—his favorite sight. Then she makes the smallest movement, and the ends of her robe fall away from her hardened nipples. Her dark areaolas steal his eyes away.

Y/N shirks the robe off of her shoulders and throws it down at the foot of the bed before climbing into it.

Naked against the sheets, she falls back against the pillows. She releases a sigh loud enough for him to hear. She grabs up her phone previously buried in the sheets. As she taps away on the device, one leg raises, knee pointed up to the ceiling.

Her face isn’t as clear as it previously was, but the new position gives him too good of a view of the pool in between her legs. Though, he would love to see her further spread open—get a better view of the bubble gum pink hidden by her pudgy lips.

A manicured hand slithers down the smooth plane of her toned stomach and between her thick thighs. With a touch so gently, she caresses her fat mound softly.

The way her body relaxes is so beautiful to him.

She rubs herself over and over, hand running over her lips with every pass. Until she presses a finger between them. Her body barely tenses as she applies the tiniest bit of pressure to her clit.

Her legs part wider and she spreads herself with her fingers. All the while, she maintains a stoic expression as she scrolls through her phone.

Nevertheless, when she opens up, he finally sees the tiny pink pearl protected by its hood. Her middle finger reaches down to circle it at a slow and calm pace.

Her glossed lips part, whatever sound that comes out of them he doesn’t hear as her head further sinks into the pillow behind her.

Her ring finger joins the middle one. Together, they pick up the pace by just a fraction. The pressure is a smidge greater.

He swallows back a moan, seeing her grow wet at her own touch. Her small hole clenches, pushing out a small gush of liquid that trickles down her crack. It seeps into the sheets beneath, creating a wet spot.

As Y/N continues to rub, never letting up, her face twitches and her hips stutter. She inches farther up on the bed, biting down on her bottom lip. The rubbing halts as she does a quick swipe down her pussy before continuing. Her lips are shining with the spread of her arousal.

God, he wonders what she sounds like.

She releases her bottom lip, mouth hanging open. A mewl leaves her. She cups herself in an attempt to suspend her orgasm.

Her whimper is soft and cute, he catches just a peak of it over the music. And she’s just too needy, too desperate for her own nut.

Hungry for some kind of friction, she resumes the action, building back up to a fairly quick pace. Her juices give too much of a slip. Nevertheless, her thighs flex. Her hips twitch.

“Mmh … hah—“

A tiny splurge of squirt splashes against her own fingers. It’s a polite little stream, one that’s got her hips canting into her hand, chasing after another release far too soon.

But rubbing isn’t good enough. Immediately, she switches to a firm hand, giving her clit three quick slaps. The pudge of her lips tremble with each one.

“Oh—fuck!”

She throws her head back. A squirt or two more burst from her, each weaker than the original one. And when she gets too weak for that, she rides out her orgasm with more rubbing.

Finally, her leg slips down the bed. Her body slumps and her hand ceases to move.

The wet spot beneath her ass has gotten considerably bigger, however, it’s still rather small.

Behind the door, Ony watches with a hand down his pants, fisting himself so hard that it’s he’s going dizzy. When his release is just at its peak, he squeezes himself to keep himself from falling over the cliff. He can’t cum too quick. Since the gym, he knew that next time he would come, he’d want it to be inside of her.

Finally, Y/N moves again, this time, stretching to grab the dildo and lube. Cracking the small bottle open, she pours some out on her fingertips. She slathers it all over the toy, making it glisten.

Spreading her legs once again, he sees her greedy hole clenches around nothing until it pushes out a dribble of soft vanilla-colored cream from her last orgasm.

“Shit,” his voice wavers.

She rubs the tip of the dildo between her lips, mixing and spreading her cum all over her lips and clit. It’s messy and sticky, thin strings of white pulling from her skin to the deep brown silicone.

His dick jumps, the wet spot in his boxers grow.

The toy looks like it has some weight to it. She does a light tap against her clit, shuddering. It makes a soft smack against her.

There goes that lip biting again. She makes circles with the thick head, coaxing herself into opening. Her arm tenses as she applies more and more pressure to the toy.

Just a little … bit … more—

The head pops through, plunging into her warmth. She breathes harder, working it deeper into herself. In and out, in and out. Soft white pearls at the mouth of her cunt, dripping down in thick beads the deeper the toy goes.

When she gets it halfway, she pulls it out. And he would have paid anything to hear the creamy sound her pussy made.

A long, thick rope of goo stretches between her cunt and the toy. The bottom half of the dildo’s length is painted in so much white, it’s almost hard to see the original color of its deep brown beneath.

“Fuck,” she breathes out, high pitched and needed.

She taps her cunt with it, even more aroused by her own sticky mess smeared all over her. Again, she plunges it back in, like she knew her pussy had missed the fullness.

And it pulls a ragged moan out of her. So fucking filthy. Her painted toes curl against the sheets, back arching with every other inch she works into herself.

Y/N keeps going until it’s all the way in, stuffing her greedy little hole, forcing more and more scandalous sounds out of her mouth.

She’s wreck, her hole swallowing around the toy, pushing out more and more globs of cum. It cakes the sliver of space between her ass cheeks, obscured by the winking of her second hole.

Y/N doesn’t give her body the chance to push out on this. Keeping a hand pressed to the toy’s base, she forces herself to get used to taking something this big.

It’s almost too much. Ony is sinking his nails into the palms of his hands, hopelessly trying to keep himself from finishing. The way she’s stretched open, repeatedly clamping down on it.

Greedy ass pussy.

His dick is pulsing, balls pulled so tight, and aching for release. He doesn’t know if he’ll last before getting in her.

Y/N shudders, hips moving mindlessly as she goes dumb over a stupid toy. She fucks deeply, mixing her guts with it. It pulls a shaky cry out of her, eyes squeezed shut.

She practically gushes around the toy. The milky white gets practically everywhere. Beneath her, the puddle only grows. And the tremble in her legs is so bad she can no longer keep them up.

Teeth bared, she hisses as she pulls it all out again.

Unbelievable.

It’s almost ridiculous how messy she’s got. The toy is dripping, the poor thing practically drowned out by her.

Y/N gives herself a chance to get a breath in before slamming the toy back in. It punches the air out of her, a loud squelch the only thing to soften the wet fart her pussy makes.

It’s amazing that he heard it over the music.

She freezes, whimpering like she had just hit the perfect spot. Her body crumbles. But she continues the assault on her pitiful little pussy, battering it with the deep strokes.

A thick ring of white froths at the base of the toy, growing every time it meets at the mouth of her cunt. It becomes enough that it gets all over her fingers, and oozing onto the bed.

Her sheets are a mess.

“F-fuck … fuuuck, Daddyy,” she groans. Her eyes roll back.

Her pussy is a sopping, sloppy mess, thanking her quite loudly as she feeds it what it wants.

But Ony knows that he’s what she really needs.

Her moans grow louder, more desperate, as she tries to claim another orgasm. At this point, she’s not even sure how many she’s had.

“Shit … shit—“

“That’s right, get it out. Get that nut...”

It takes far too many seconds for the new voice to register in her fucked out, hazy brain.

Her eyes peel open to see the tall figure leaning against the entrance of her room.

His head almost grazes the top of the doorframe. Thick, muscular arms trail down into the pockets of his sweats. Sweats that do nothing to hide how hard his dick is.

Fear finally strikes through her, and the sensible part of her brain tells her to cover up.

The attempt is cute, pathetic, even: She barely manages to conceal her body. Her breasts spill through her splayed fingers, and her other hand hovers over her messy pussy.

“W-what are you doing here?” The tremble in her already small voice, brings an even bigger smile out of him.

“Oh, don’t lemme stop you. I’m just here for what’s mine, Y/N.”

All the air leaves her chest as he says her name. His tongue bends around it perfectly, like he’d practiced saying it for this moment.

She clenches around the toy. “Wh-who are you?“

“I been watching you.”

She shrinks in on herself, like a scared little bunny, cornered by its predator.

“I-is it money? Do y-you want money—”

“Nah,” he shakes his head. “I want you, mama.”

Her mouth never closes, too scared to speak yet fearing what might happen if she were silent.

“H-how did you get in my house?”

He rolls his lips for a second, eyes never leaving her body. “Should really get a better lock.”

Tears well up in her deep-brown eyes, threatening to spill over onto the already dewy fat of her cheeks.

“P-please, please—don’t hurt me—“

“No, no—c’mon, Y/N. C’mon now,” he coos, stepping to the bed.

She inches back, the heel of her foot slipping against the puddle of wetness she had created all on her own. She can chance running, but how well will that work? Her previous orgasms have turned her limbs to jell-o.

“I ain’t tryna hurt you. I’m just tryna make you feel good.”

She glances back down at his dick, poking through the sweats. He doesn’t even stop himself, gripping at his erection. She forgets how to breathe for a second: He’s impossibly hard … and thick.

Y/N desperately tries not to acknowledge the way her pussy clamps down on the toy. Her chest tightens as she looks back into his eyes.

“I know you been lonely. Ain’t got nobody to talk to … no one who knows your body—could make it feel good. I wanna do that, so let me.”

How long has he been watching her? Why? He told her, but she just doesn’t get it! What is he getting out of this?

“Lemme make you feel good, Y/N. Don’t make me beg for it.”

Her lips part, yet she stops herself before her mouth starts moving. She catches him staring harder than he should.

Some part of her brain loves the attention she’s getting, it’s been a long time since that’s happened. But she reminds herself that this is ultimately a terrible thing that she shouldn’t find enjoyment—of any measure—in.

Watching his face closely, she attempts to sear the details of his face into her brain. He’s not ugly, far from it. If he wasn’t a fucking creep, she might’ve even approached him in a bar or at the club.

A well groomed beard, pristine waves, plump lips, high cheekbones, and a nose that would make riding a face the most pleasant experience ever.

She blinks, throwing away the thought.

“Y/N…”

Her name makes a low rumble in his chest.

“A-and you—you’re not gonna hurt me?”

He shakes his head. “Not unless you want me to.” He licks his lips before they spread into a grin.

God, she just can’t help it. He was right, she needs this. She’s desperate for it. Desperate for someone to come and fuck her so good that her she goes stupid—cock-drunk.

“Are you clean?” Her voice is much quieter than before.

There goes that charming smile of his again.

“As a whistle.”

She eyes him carefully.

“I’ll stop the second you tell me,” he mumbles, dark eyes zeroing in on the spot between her legs.

She’s got no reason to trust the guy who stalked her and broke into her home. If she says yes, she’ll be making the stupidest decision of a lifetime.

“O-okay.”

He closes the space between him and the bed. In seconds he’s rounding her side, standing over her smaller figure.

“You’on know how long I waited for this.”

Before she can ask, a heavy hands clasps around one of her ankles. Her heart leaps out of her chest as he drags her to the edge of the bed.

He hangs her legs around his waist like a belt. Y/N resists the urge to close them around him.

Up close, her pussy is a dream. A sticky, drooling mess of cum. She’s stretched so wide around the toy, her puffy lips pulled taut.

Licking at his lips, Ony yanks his shirt over his head. It’s tossed to the ground behind him.

He notices how she still hides her chest from him.

“You hiding from me?”

She shakes her head quickly, eyes still wide.

“Good, ‘cause I seen it already.” He pulls her hands away, gently. “So fuckin’ perfect,” he sighs out.

He brings a hand to cup her left breast, thumbing at her stiff nipple. He barely hears her whimper over the music before pinching at her.

Her back arches, beautifully, chest bouncing as she does so. He leans down, capturing the right nipple in his mouth.

Another sound, which he can barely fucking hear.

The hand on her breast lifts, traveling to grasp her neck as the other sinks past her tummy. Her chest billows, air stuck in her throat as he switches over to suckle at the left nipple.

He caresses the creamy mess of her pussy. Her hips chase after his hand, rutting into it when he runs his fingers through her folds. Middle and ring finger joined, he rubs with suitable pressure against her thumping clit.

A weak moan tumbles past her lips. He pulls off of her.

“Low down the music.”

His voice is gruff, she can’t even tell that she’s gotten wetter.

“M-my phone.”

He pulls away for just a second, using her phone to lower the volume. The Twitter video she had playing has long since paused. He clicks the phone off, tossing it God knows where.

His hand returns to her neck, squeezing as he plays in the mess of her pussy. Her cunt squishes against his fingers, quite loudly.

She whimpers in embarrassment, looking away.

“Fuck,” he moans, watching her clamp around the toy.

Slowly, her embarrassment burns away as she slips deeper into pleasure. Switching his positioning, the rough pad of his thumb slips and slides against her, causing her head to fall back and her eyes to slip closed.

His hand leaves her clit to go lower. A sharp gasp falls from her lips as the toy is tugged at by its base.

“Lemme help you with that,” he rasps just before pulling it all the way out.

Webs of cum stretch between her and the toy before breaking. She mewls, and he gets to see her pretty pink hole, exposed to the air. It clenches repeatedly, as if it missed the feeling of being full. Her cum from previous orgasms ooze out of her like thick, milky syrup.

“I’ma fill up this pussy soon,” he swears to himself.

Ony brings the messy dildo to his face, examining it in all its closeness. It’s sticky with her cream. He almost wants to taste it. To taste her.

“The second time I ever seen you was at the gym.”

She tries to work through the fog of her own brain to comprehend his words.

“That pretty, fat ass looked real good in those shorts. So did that pussy.”

He plunges his fingers into her, moving so quick that she splashes back against him. She’s a mess, crying out.

“She speaking to me, huh?”

Throwing her head back, she moans out. He hums, pulling his hand out. Far too easily, he sticks his gooey fingers in his mouth, sucking off her cream.

And—fuck—she tastes amazing.

“Turn ‘round for me.”

“Wait—w-what do I call you?”

“Ony.” He licks at his bottom lip.

With no other words, he flips her over on her stomach. A heavy hand lands on her left ass cheek, making the fat shake like jello.

She hisses, back arching as she pushes her ass up higher into the air.

“Yeah, keep that ass up f’me.”

He reaches out, gripping a cheek tight. He spreads it. His thumb inches towards her puckered hole, spreading her release around it.

“You gon’ lemme fuck you here?” He hums.

The thought of stretching her ass out makes his dick jump in his pants. He’s gonna have to come out of those soon.

Y/N moans into the messy sheets, gripping at them.

“Ever been fucked there?”

Her voice is muffled.

“Say that again?”

She twists her head to the side. “Y-yes.”

“Oh, so you a lil’ freak then?” His thumb pressed into her harder, yet it doesn’t break past. “I knew that, though,” he says to himself, still toying with her butt.

“Please...”

“Please, what?”

“Please, Ony. Fuck me.”

He throws his head back in laughter. “In ya butt?”

Her shoulders hunch in embarrassment. Y/N rests her head on folded arms and looks back at him through wet lashes.

A pout on her lips, she barely nods. And he can’t help but to coo at her. But, he gives a firm head shake. “Nah. I won’t stick my dick there.”

Her face falls.

“But, we could use this fun lil’ toy you bought.”

Her eyes widen and her arch slackens. “Wait, wait—I-I don’t know if it’ll fit.”

“If this won’t fit, I definitely won’t.” Picking up the dildo, he smacks the thick, silicon tip against her anus. “Wouldn’t hurt to try though, right?”

“Ony—“

“You’on trust me, mama?”

She stares at him, sucking on her bottom lip. After a minute of thinking, she nods.

“Good girl.”

She whimpers as cold lube drips onto her crack, although he’s sure she doesn’t even need it with how much she’d cum. Still, doesn’t hurt to be safe.

He spreads it with his thumb, applying just enough pressure to tease the entrance of a finger. And then his thumb pops in, pulling a low whine out of her.

“You ever used ya fingers here before?”

She buries her head into the sheets, moaning into them.

Ony takes his time, pushing and pulling his thumb at a slow pace. “Words, mama.”

“Yes.”

He never switches up the pace on her, trying to get her comfortable. But, she can’t help that greed burning in the pit of her tummy. She wants to feed it.

“More…”

“Ouu, you dirty.” He smacks the creamy dildo against a cheek.

A breathless giggle floats past her lips.

Rocking on her knees, she shakes her ass for him. “More, Ony.”

“How much you want?”

“Mmph—all,” she groans, eyes fluttering shut.

“You like that freaky shit?”

“Yeah,” she moans breathlessly.

It makes sense, seeing as how her body offers little resistance to him. He removes his thumb, and there she is, clenching around nothing again. He’ll fix that.

Slowly, he pushes the tip of the dildo in. And then he works it in, pushing, pulling, and even twisting the toy.

“Oh, fuck, Ony,” Y/N whines. Despite the burn of the stretch, she pushes her ass back against him.

“Yeah, fuck y’self on this dick.” With his free hand, he tugs at his sweats. “Just like that, baby.”

Clear fluid gathers at her stretched rim. As he fucks her, it drips from the toy. Her pussy weeps at the backdoor stimulation.

“So fucking dirty.” He swipes a finger through her folds as he continues to fuck her ass. He thumbs at her clit, loving the way her body twitches and shudders at all he does.

Thick globs of her honey slowly drip from her.

Finally, he pushes the dildo all the way in. Her hole clenches repeatedly, naturally working to push it out.

“Keep that shit in,” he grunts, smacking her ass.

She whimpers loudly. Her eyes can barely keep open with the constant threat of rolling back into her skull. She feels so full already. The thick toy has got her so stuffed, undoubtedly making the space between her walls tighter.

Speaking of, Ony flips Y/N on her back, ready to get in between them. Peering down at her face, she already looks fucked out of it.

“You ready to tap out?”

His thumb caresses her clit in a way that has her pulling in her bottom lip. Pushing past her arousal, Y/N sits up on her elbows to stare down at the mess he’s making with her: swirling the mess around.

“Hm?”

Her mouth falls open slowly as a glob of his spit lands right on his target.

“Uh-uh,” she exhales, shaking her head so fast it almost makes her dizzy.

“Good.”

He grips her thick thighs as he gets down on his knees. Lowering his face in between her legs, his breath tickles her. He laughs when she jumps.

Her body teems with excitement as it trembles under him.

Eye contact is strong as the soft pink of his tongue breaks past his thick lips. From her clenching hole to her thumping pearl, he runs it straight through her puffy, glistening folds.

Her legs twitch against his hands, but he keeps them in place.

A faint cry falls from her lips, so soft he doesn’t even hear it. With every lick and suckle, she grows wetter. He laps at her honeypot, the bottom half of his face getting shinier with every passing second.

The twisted sheets between her fingers aren’t enough. One hand releases the cloth, brain muddying so much that she no longer fears touching him with her hands.

An acrylic-laid fingers falls atop his waves.

At the back of her mind, she half-expected him to stop in the middle of eating—pulling away to remove her hand and tell her not to fuck up his hair. But he doesn’t.

He just keeps on eating. Eating like his life depends on it. Eating like this is his last meal on this earth.

His head twists and turns, neck craning to get the best angles so that his tongue may reach deeper—that he may taste more.

“Sh-shit … Ony,” she mewls, back arching into the air.

The tip of nose slides against her clit. She clenches repeatedly around his tongue.

“Ony, I…”

He hums into, as if to say “go on.”

Her eyes blink lazily, jaw only slackening as she reaches closer.

She tastes better than water. He can guzzle her down forever.

Only pressing his face further into her puffy pussy, every crease of her is laden with her water.

“Oh, God—Ony!”

Against his desires, he pulls away, replacing his face with his hands. He parts her lips with one hand, the other passing back and forth over her clit.

“C’mon, Y/N,” he drawls, hand moving faster than his voice.

“Mmh … auuh—“

Her splishing turns to a gush, his fingers beating against the stream.

She hisses, throwing her head back against the mattress.

“Give it to me,” he goads, dragging a hand down her thigh to smack her.

Still holding her open, he leans back in to drink from her, eyes squeezed shut as he indulges far too much.

He doesn’t stop until he sucks her dry, cleaning her up despite her whimpers of overstimulation.

“You taste good, Ma,” he croaks, licking at his lips.

His eyes don’t leave her quivering mound. Letting his immediate thoughts take ahold of him, he spits on it, only to sup her up one more time.

He hardly realizes the faint pushing at his forehead. Getting the message, he finally lets up.

Her body is a puddle on the mattress. Her heaving chest shines with sweat.

Against his hands, her thighs tremble. Puffs of air float past her heart shaped lips.

That had to be the best head she’s ever gotten. It was almost too overwhelming. Even as she tries to calm her heart, it’s just beating too fast.

And she hasn’t even done anything but lay on her back and take it.

That’s all Ony needs of her.

Letting go of her legs, he gets back on his feet.

“Where you want it?”

She blinks hazily, her vision blurred. “H-huh?”

“Thought I was finished?”

She struggles to sit up on her elbows.

“Yeah,” he chuckles. Y/N looks down just in time for him to pull himself out of his sweats. “Nah.”

Just as his tip is freed from the waistband of his boxer, his dick bobs, almost slapping against his stomach. And speaking of his tip, it’s wide. The perfect shade of calm pink. But still wide.

He’s got a curve that she’s sure will pierce her cervix. And prominent veins that she knows she’ll feel when he’s inside. With the way it’s standing, he doesn’t need no quick two or three pumps to get ready.

“That pussy ready f’me?” he breathes, wrapping his thick fingers around his dick and lifting it.

“It’s t-too … big.” She gazes up at him, expression open and unsure.

He props himself up on me hand over her. With the other, he smacks his cock against her pudgy lips.

The sheer heaviness of him makes her jump. Her tiny gasp is adorable. Tugging at his bottom lip with teeth, Ony taps her again, reveling in the wet plop it makes.

It’s not even in her yet and that left curve is hitting her just right—her clit, that is. And he seems to share her ecstasy; He fights rolling his eyes back as he rubs his throbbing tip through her slippery labia.

Precum is smeared all over her, and it’s a sight similar to a freshly glazed chocolate donut.

Tiny twitches disrupt her body as she’s once again building back up to another orgasm. She whimpers, feeling her pussy widen as it prepares to take him in.

But he didn’t enter, only playing with her body in the cruelest way.

“Nngh … c’mon,” she quietly begs.

“Just a little bit more, baby.”

His denial has rivers gushing out onto his dick, getting him wet enough for her. Finally, he aligns himself with her and ever so slowly, does he press into her.

If this isn’t heaven on earth, he doesn’t know what the fuck it is.

A tight, wet pocket of heat swallows his tip easily. He moans pathetically, arms shaking as he tries to fight against himself to keep from busting too quick.

She’s clenching repeatedly, like she’s never had dick before. The thought has him twitch, the small movement she feels. It has her clenching down on him even harder.

A deep groan erupts from him, his head dropping into his chest as he continues to bully his way into her pussy. He slides his hips back and forth, opening her up more and more.

Gotta keep going echoes in his head, even as there’s a mere inch of him left to give.

Around his waist, her legs tremble so much she tightens them around him so that it mightn’t be so noticeable. Her body is so tightly wound, holding back.

Ony shifts on his feet, catching the small wince Y/N makes. He readies himself and pushes the last inch in, a tiny plop heard as their skin collides. He shudders at the feeling, only made better as her body tries to milk him. Flush against her, his balls are pressed into the cloud of her cream which she had pushed out.

“So fuckin’ wet, baby,” he groans.

She can feel him jumping inside of her. Her legs squeeze him tighter. It’s her first time using both holes at once, and she didn’t think she’d be feeling this full.

Clenching around both him and the toy has her fighting to keep her eyes open. And he hasn’t moved yet, but it’s like he’s in her stomach. It’s what she can only describe as a deep ache that feels wonderful. And the toy is only making her feel more sensitive.

“You ready?” Ony gruffs, fisting at the sheets to keep some sense of control.

She nods, at a loss for words. Too scared to open her mouth, because what will come out might not even be a coherent sentence or thought. Just broken babbles and sounds.

Keeping close, he hooks a hand under the crook of her right knee and slowly lifts her leg until it’s thrown over his shoulder. It brought a devilish grin to his lips, watching her face morph into one of incredulity as he makes her stretch to get a tighter hole.

The squeeze—he can’t even describe it. But he’s sure she can tell by the way his eyes roll back. Her clinching down is dangerous. He wants to tell her to stop, but he doesn’t even think he can speak.

“Fuuuck—“

He heaves his hips out of her at a dragging pace. And she makes it so hard, like her body doesn’t want to let him go. He practically fights against the suction of her.

Soft cries pour from her lips, made louder when he slides back in. He builds into a comfortable pace. Every time their hips meet, there’s a resounding wet splat is heard. So focused keeping it up, he doesn’t even see how her pelvis is bathed in the pasty gloop of her weeping pussy.

Her moans are choked up, like music to his ears as he fully sheathes himself inside of her. Deciding that he wanted to remain in her, he circles his hips, repeatedly pressing the crown of his dick into her cervix while hitting her G-spot.

“GOD—“

He doesn’t let up, continuing to mix up her pot of honey. He has to remind himself to breathe, feeling like he’s almost drowning in her.

“Ony,” she whines, over and over again, warbling in his ear. Her arms are thrown around his shoulder, nails clawing at the skin of his back.

“You like this?”

She hastily nods, too broken to speak.

“Huh?” He exhales, still working his dick into her. “You like how I’m fucking you?”

“Yes, yes!”

He gives her a few more pumps before pulling himself up to stand. Regaining his footing, Ony unhooks her leg from his shoulder to hold by her ankle.

Now that he’s not in too deep, he chances looking at the mess they’ve created. Her viscous spread to the inners of her quaking thighs and the valley between her ass.

The mess on the bed is so thick, the puddle beneath dotted with globs of white that crest the bottom of her cheeks. Webbings of tacky release attach them, too heavy to keep up in gravity. And speaking of, his balls drip with thick blobs of cum.

Pleading whines knock him from his trance, pushing him to continue. Turning his head, he presses a wet smooch to the inside of her calve.

“Look so fucking sexy.” Another kiss just an inch higher. “Split open on my dick like this.” He pecks her ankle. “Pussy weeping for me.”

Bringing her foot closer to his face, he presses his lips to her clean foot sole. Her acrylic-laden toes curl as he begins to move again. Her croons are drowned out by the piercing spurts they make as he plunges into her.

His thick tongue slips past his lips, curling around her big toe before he sucks on it. Y/N does nothing but whine, a hand pressing to his lower abdomen as he fucks her good. Her brain is a puddle as he sucks on her toes.

As his tongue laves her two middle toes, one hand holding up her leg, he uses the other to press against her lower stomach. A ragged cry rips from her as her body further tenses.

“Yeaah,” he drags out once his mouth is off of her. “You feel me there?”

She responds, but he can’t even tell what she’s saying. It’s all just nonsense blubbering.

“Feel me fucking you this deep?” He doesn’t let up. In fact, he’s fucking harder. “All in your stomach, baby…”

Her eyes are glazed over, barely open as she just takes it.

Ony didn’t think she would get any wetter than this. But as he pushes in her, rivulets of sap splash back against his pelvis. It’s a warm, heavy ache that only feels better with the pressure from all ends. And a bit of the ache is relieved every time her body releases a warm flow of slop from between her legs.

Her body bounces, breasts rolling with every movement. She’s fucking gushing like a spout he can’t seem to shut off. Not that he wants to. In fact, he doesn’t think he ever wants to pull out. With all this wetness, he can’t even tell if he came yet. But if he did, he knows that once isn’t enough to satiate him.

“Should bust in here.” He presses down harder on her stomach. She sobs, brokenly. “Fill you with my seed … fill that pussy up with me—“

His hips stutter, pace faltering.

“Fuck—Im’a mark you. Make s-sure … no other nigga … scumming in this—a-awe shit!”

His dick jumps as spurts of coming empty out of him, balls tightening as he feeds her pussy every ounce of cum he has. And she’s eating up, swallowing it all around him.

He stays in for a minute, her body just continuing to milk him for all he’s worth until he’s empty.

“Shit, you feel so good, baby,” he groans.

When he finally pulls out, his release is too much for her to contain. Immediately, it chases after him, seeping out in thick dribbles. He pushes her legs back to get the best view.

And as he watches, she reaches a hand down to stick her fingers in all of it. Pulling them away to have him see the sticky strings of their cum mixed together. She slaps at her messy cunt before dipping lower to scoop up his falling cum, only to make a feeble effort to push it back inside.

“Fucking nasty,” he laughs, and when he looks up to see her face, she’s got a dazed smile on her lips.

But in all honesty, watching her play in their messy has him bricked up again, which she instantly catches. Before he can say anything, she pushes herself onto her stomach and lifts her ass into the air.

“One more,” she says softly, peering back at him over her shoulder.

It’s a debauched sight. The toy is still pushed in deep, and she’s dripping onto the bed. Gingerly, she reaches a hand down between her legs, cupping her sensitive mound before lifting her fingers back to messily toy with her clit.

“C’mon, Ony,” she whines, rocking her ass back and forth.

Even as she begs, she doesn’t wait for him, still rubbing as herself for one more release. Her eyes fall closes, ass cheeks and legs twitching as she builds up to another orgasm.

Her eyes open for a sliver of a second, just enough for him to see them roll back. Her mouth drops open, the ghost of a wail leaving through it.

There’s nothing.

And then…

A harsh shiver wracks throughout her body, announcing the violent spray of squirt that further soaks the mattress, fuck the sheets at this point.

“Oh God … oh God,” she groans, body almost convulsing as she beats against her clit, dragging it out. “Onyyy,” she cries.

Her pussy clenches repeatedly, almost begging for something to fill it, even as it pushes out an orgasm for the umpteenth time tonight. So, he gives her what she wants.

DIck in hand, he holds onto her ass and guides himself back into her. With no patience this time around, he drops his dick into her with so much ease it slides in.

And as he bottoms out, her pussy makes a loud, wet fart. The sound is punctured with a heavy moan by her. He pulls out and pushes back in. The sound repeats, much wetter this time. And he does it again, hearing the squishing of her pussy alongside the wet suction.

The sound goads him to push in and pull out, repeatedly. Loud splats accompany the bouncing of her ass against his pelvis. The ripples of her fat are hypnotic, and he’s getting lost in it. Reaching out, he grasps her throat, squeezing just enough that she’s clutching onto his arm. His dick throbs as she clenches around him.

“Got me cumming back to back in this pussy—“

Leaning over her, leg propped up on the bed frame, he fucks into her deeper. The arch in her back is so deep as his dick pierces her stomach. The hand at her hip leaves its spot to lay a heavy smack on her ass.

“Sh-shit!”

“You love that shit,” he grits in her ears. That hand travels to the toy buried deep in her. He applies pressure to the base, and she wails. “Love being fucked … in both holes, huh?”

Wet tears streak her puffy cheeks. The head-tie that once sat neatly atop her hair has been slipped. The top of leave-out peaking out at him.

“Gonna fill you up again—“

“Please!”

He doesn’t try to last as long this time, emptying his second or third load deep in her. He can’t even tell the number at this point.

“Fuck, I’m in this pussy,” he babbles, eyes squeezed shut. “Gonna give you my kids,” his breath shudders.

Her pussy makes a sound akin to bubble-popping, squishing, as he forces his hips deeper. Bubbles of cum froth at the base of where they meet. The sensation, the vision—it all prolongs his orgasm.

As she feels his thick ropes of cum shoot off inside of her, it brings on her final release of the night. They both moan far too loud, bodies sagging into each other as exhaustion overtakes them.

“Damn,” he sighs, breathless laughter following.

A low whine is her only response, too fucked out to even think of one good enough.

Tiredly, he reaches down to gently pull the dildo out. It’s drenched in a clear fluid. He throws it down on the bed, not too concerned with cleaning at the moment. Her hole winks, stretched out from the toy.

“Can’t let you go after this,” he mumbles into the crook of her neck. “Never.”

Her only response is pushing her ass back against him.

“No other nigga gon’ fuck you like this. You hear?”

She groans out what is her best interpretation of a “yes.”

And that’s all he needs.

This is the last part of this miniseries! Thank you for reading, hope you enjoyed, lmk your thoughts

#aot onyankopon #onyankopon x black y/n #onyankopon x reader #onyankopon smut #onyankapon #aot #attack on titan #aot x reader #aot smut #fanfic #fanfiction

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polakina · 2 months

Text

when you wear their clothes

call of duty headcanons #9

hc masterlist // masterlist

so writing a book is harder than i thought...like a full fucking novel. how do people do this?

rating: explicit

loves it

loves it every. fucking. time.

usually finds you in his shirt when he gets home from a long few weeks at work away from you

its always his favourite shirt

an old rock band tee he used to wear when he was younger and could never bring himself to get rid of

it hugged your thighs and rested just above your knees

he adored the fact that you wore his clothes

he adored it even more when he pulled it out of the wardrobe and it smelled of you

often times he couldn't help himself around you when you wore that shirt

loved to fuck you in that shirt

bury his face in the crook of your neck, breathing in the fabric that smelled only of your perfume when he thrusted into you

lost all sense of subtlety when he noticed you didn't wear anything underneath it

oh how he knew you loved to tease him

bending over to collect the laundry off the floor, teasing him as he caught a glimpse of what was shielded between your legs

you often found yourself bent over the closest surface whenever you did that, his hands roaming over your ass, pushing the long fabric up your body, the tee bunching against the center of your spine

"wearing my clothes around the house, hmm love? god i fucking love it when you do that"

"god you look so fucking good in my shirts"

looks forward to coming home and seeing you in his clothes

its what makes him drive just that tiny bit faster to reach the driveway

forgot how to breathe the first time you wore his hoodie around the house

you were absentmindedly humming to yourself, watering the various plants and tidying the bookshelves

he always found it cute how you had to push the sleeves up your arms because they were too long

loved pulling the hood over your head and chuckling when the edge of the hood reached your nose

sometimes, when putting laundry away in the set of drawers, he'd pull that hoodie out and press his nose against the fabric, inhaling deeply to fill his nose when your scent

he found himself so aroused, so turned on when you wore his clothes

he couldn't understand why

but just as quick as he'd seen those clothes on you, they were on the floor even faster

"you should wear my clothes more often, darling"

"you've got no fucking idea how much it turns me on seeing you dressed like that"

he'd fuck you until he ran out of breath, until sweat dripped down his brows

after that one time, you always found that hoodie in your drawer instead of his, always freshly washed and folded along with your clothes

had always dreamed of this moment

he'd recently bought a new denim jacket with a fur lining for the colder months

you both liked going for walks into the nearby town during autumn and winter, to get coffee in your joint favourite cafe and catch up

but when he couldn't find his jacket , he turned to you, his heart jumping when he saw it covering your body

smiles softly every time you say "i'll just get my jacket" and walk out in that denim jacket of his

the very definition of 'what's mine is yours' and loves it

leaves it out for you by the front door on purpose so you'll grab it on the way out of the house

you like to wear it when you go out to drink because it keeps you warm when you go out for a smoke

once he's got a few drinks in him, anything's on the table

and you know it

which is exactly why you do it

being in a public setting makes him just that much bolder

his hands find his way under that jacket, pushing your dress up over your ass, the tail of the jacket just covering what could be a very explicit scene for some passersby

"fuck, lass, the things you do to me. bet you can feel it, yeah?"

"aw baby, you're cold? don't worry, i'll warm you right up. you just keep my jacket on and you'll be fine, sweetheart"

you guys are a similar size in clothes, which he secretly loves but also hates

one time you saw him wearing your hoodie and couldn't stop laughing about it for hours because he didn't even realise

was very careful picking out his clothes after that

but if you wear his? god, he doesn't know how to act. or what to say

it started out with small things

the occasional shirt, the odd jumper

but when you came downstairs one night wearing his pajamas, he couldn't stop smiling

"what you doing there, babe? is that why it took you so long upstairs? finding my clothes, huh?"

plaid, red and black pajama pants with a matching sleep shirt

he loved that look on you. a little baggy but a perfect fit

made for you

"come here, babe" he'd coax you over

he loved feeling his clothes on your skin, seeing the swell of your breasts between the collar of the shirt

"babe, you look so damn good right now"

he'd make you ride him while you wore his clothes, just pulling the pants down enough to slide his cock into you with ease

you found a lot more of his clothes lying around for convenience rather than your own, which you could never seem to locate

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laundrybiscuits · 1 year

Text

(Continued from this snippet! Content notes: police interrogation, homophobia)

“You don’t look gay.” The detective gives Steve a very obvious once-over. Steve tries to look gayer as subtly as he can.

“Sorry,” he says. “Guess I’ll have to let my boyfriend know you don’t think I look gay enough to fuck him.”

The detective’s face twists slightly, like he’s smelled something bad. “No need to be like that. I’m just saying, I bet a good-looking guy like you could get a girlfriend pretty easy.”

“You’re not my type,” says Steve. He smiles with his teeth, even though his heart is going fast and he can feel his palms starting to sweat.

The detective’s hands tense, and Steve wonders if he’s about to get hit, but they relax again and the detective sits back.

“Just doing my job,” says the detective. “Because, funny enough, we asked around with all your little friends, and it seems like you used to be a bit of a ladies’ man.”

“Things change,” says Steve.

“In fact…seems like none of your friends ever even saw you talk to Munson before. Moved in different circles and everything. I remember what high school was like.”

The detective leans close.

“So why would the captain of the swim team, a nice normal boy from a good family with a string of pretty girlfriends, ever—ever—stick his neck out like this for some murdering scum like Munson? That’s what I’m trying to figure out, here.”

“Don’t fucking talk about him like that,” says Steve. His mouth is dry. His pulse is thundering in his ears. “He didn’t kill anyone. He was with me the whole time. He’s—he didn’t kill anyone.”

“Hm,” says the detective.

It takes a while for them to stop interrogating him. They keep asking him the same questions over and over, trying to trip him up. He asks for water and doesn’t get it. In the back of his mind, a hysterical little voice is shrieking Scoops Ahoy! I work for Scoops Ahoy!, but he manages to keep it locked down. Doesn’t let himself get baited, just keeps repeating that Eddie was with him the whole time and neither of them know anything.

It takes a while, but it’s over eventually.

When he leaves the station, Eddie’s standing outside with Hopper and Joyce Byers, wearing a shirt and jeans that definitely belonged to Jonathan at some point. Eddie’s got his hands tucked into his armpits, looking antsy and tense, but he’s free and standing on his own two feet. It’s a pretty big upgrade from when Steve last saw him about a week or two ago.

It’s almost too easy to go straight over to him, wrapping him up in a tight hug like they’ve had their arms around each other a million times.

“Oof. Easy there, tiger,” laughs Eddie. “I’m, uh, still a little fragile.”

“Sorry,” says Steve, and loosens his hold. He doesn’t let go all the way.

“Come on, boys,” says Joyce. “I’m taking you two home. Steve, Eddie’s been staying with us, but we’re a little short on spare beds and it’s not great for his recovery. We’re moving him to your place until we can figure out something better, okay?”

———

Joyce drops them off and helps carry in a few garbage bags full of Eddie’s stuff. There’s not that much.

And then the door closes behind her, and Steve’s alone with Eddie for the first time since—actually, maybe ever.

“So,” says Eddie. “What…the fuck, Harrington.”

“Is that an actual question?” Steve says. He rolls his shoulders, trying to get some of the stiffness out. “I mean, didn’t Hopper and Mrs. Byers explain everything to you?”

“Kind of? I mean, I still think this is probably the worst idea of all time, but they told me—anyway, what I meant just now was a much more personalized and individual what the fuck. As in, why the fuck would you agree to any of this? You know you’re never gonna get another girl in this town to look at you now.”

“Dumping me already? Ice cold, man.”

Eddie groans and actually throws his hands in the air in frustration. Steve hadn’t known people did that in real life.

“Jesus christ.” Eddie wheels around and grabs two of the garbage bags. “I can’t do this right now, I need to take a fucking nap. We will be discussing this later.”

“Still don’t know what there is to discuss,” says Steve, but he picks up the last garbage bag and leads the way to the spare room.

Eddie pitches forwards onto the bed, arms outstretched and face mashed into the pillow. “Fuck yes, I am going to marry this goddamn mattress. Hit the lights when you leave,” he says, slightly muffled.

For a second, Steve finds himself stepping forward with a hand outstretched to—do something. He’s not sure what. Touch Eddie’s hair, or something dumb like that. His face warms. He’s really glad Eddie isn’t looking at him and doesn’t see how he’s kind of just standing there with a hand out for no reason.

He turns around, flicking the light switch on his way out, and doesn’t look back.

#steddie #the document title for this is literally “2 cakes”#bc again...there is already a fic with this premise. by bonitabreezy. as I have already said: please go read that instead!#this is like the writing equivalent of a figure study #don't know where it's going or if it's going anywhere. I truly am just vibing with increasingly dubious historical accuracy.

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luvyeni · 3 months

Text

❛PRACTICE ROOM❜ ( h. seunghan )

p. boyfriend!hong seunghan x 8thmember!reader w. 1k

warnings? fem!reader, oral ( f. receiving ), uprotected sex

request: i’m in a drought 😞😞😞 i need some crazy seunghan smut yeni im dying without it 😞😞😞 pls give me some spare change for the bucket of seunghan smut

— 𖦹 ( seunghan getting horny during practice just by looking at you ) !

He couldn’t help it — he knew the cameras where on, he could feel his members pinching him back to reality; but he couldn’t help it, you looked so good. Your hair tied up like he loved, skin glistening from dancing — he wanted to pounce on you right then and there.

“seunghan pay attention.” The dance instructor pulled him back to reality; he noticed you smiling in the corner of his eyes, making his ears turn red im embarrassed knowing you caught him staring. “yeah pay attention and stop staring at yn.”

The rest of the guys including you began to laugh, until the instructed you all to focus, bringing it back to practice. He turned to you quickly — you were already looking at him, smiling right before the music started.

Finally practice was over, everyone packing up to go home, ready to wash away the day and go to bed. “yn are you coming back to the dorm?” shotaro asked. “no im gonna stay behind and practice the dance a little more.” You said taking a sip of water. “I’ll be home soon.”

“I’ll stay with her.” Seunghan quickly spoke up, dropping his bag. The group smirked at him, knowing what he was up to. “of course you are.” Wonbin said. “remember these walls aren’t soundproof.” He pushed them out of the room, closing the door — making sure to lock it. “I saw that.”

He turned to you, where you were already looking at him through the mirror. “I bet you did, the way I caught you staring at me all day through practice.” You scoffed, rolling your eyes. “says the one who got called out twice for staring at me today.”

You felt him wrap his arms around your waist. “I couldn’t help it.” You sighed as he kissed your neck. “you looked so good dancing earlier.” He whispered in your ear, his hand slowly creeping up to cup your boob. “se-seunghan.” You mewled.

He let your boob go, turning your body around, grabbing your jaw to kiss you. “fuck, do you know how hard it is to watch you dance.” He pushed you down on the couch, sinking down to his knees, spreading your legs. “it’s so hard hiding how much I want you.” He pulled down your sweats down to your ankles. “you’re so fucking sexy.”

He got rid of your panties, the air from the practice room hitting your cunt, making you whine with need. “se-seunghan I need you.” He kissed the inside of your thighs — inhaling your scent. “you smell so good.” He kissed your cunt, kitty licking your clit. “taste good too.”

Your head lolled back against the couch as he lapped at your cunt. “fu-fuck that feels good.” You whined, tangling your hands up in his head — his eyes looking up at you. “fu-fuck seunghan im gonna cum.” His nose hitting your clit encouraging your orgasm. “fuck im cumming!” you moaned out, grinding against his face as you came down from your high.

He pulled away from your cunt, giving your cunt a kiss before standing up. “so pretty baby.” He pushed his pants down to the floor. “I want you to ride me baby.” He sat down, and you climbed into his lap, his cock head pressed against your hole. “go on and sit on my cock baby.” You sunk down on his cunt, both of you moaning out on pleasure. “fu-fuck baby move for me.”

You rocked your hips back and forth — he lifted your shirt up, revealing your tits, his mouth coming up to your boobs, sucking on your nipples. “oh my god.” You gasped, his hands on your ass bouncing on your cock.

Both of you were sweating like crazy, the practice room smelling of sex as you fucked yourself on his cock. “fu-fuck baby im gonna cum.” He groaned. “gonna cum inside you.” You fucked up into you— you screamed, holding on to his shoulders. “fu-fuck me too!” both of you panting, your orgasms vastly approaching.

“fu-fuck shit shit, im cumming!” he groaned— but he didn’t stop; he kept going until your body seized up, and you came all over his cock. “good girl, that’s it cum all over my cock.” He held you in his arms as you came down from your highs. “sh-shit.” You dry laughed. “you can’t keep getting horny during practice.”

“baby I can’t help it, you look really good.” He smiled sheepishly. “yeah but people can see you practically eye fucking me on camera, so many youtube videos.” You said standing up to get dressed. “at this point we might as well just announce our relationship to everyone.”

“im good with that.” He shrugged, you rolled your eyes.

“come to your senses baby.”

©️LUVYENI

#kpop x reader #kpop smut #riize x reader #riize smut #riize imagines #riize x imagine #riize hard thoughts #riize hard hours #riize fanfic #riize fics #seunghan x reader #seunghan smut

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thegnomelord · 4 months

Note

With all these M!reader courting (and practically rizzing up everyone) in their own hybrid way, imagine poor Ghost, he's like toothless, doesn't know how tf to court someone of say, even his own species because he was once human

And with that rant about all the absurd ways of courting, what would he call as his own?

Would he give gifts like Gaz and Price? A piece to remember them by?

I doubt he'd be the physical type like cuddly ol soap who loves to scent,

He's practically a shadow (literally and figuratively) and I feel like the best he can do is stare and slowly blink like a cat (and let's be honest most of the time we don't see his eye) so he might even just act like a stalker and watch from afar, not much of a scent even on him if he's near, even when in the midst of battle

So what can he do then? I feel like going to Price is his best bet and when he tries to scent something like Soap it smells like nothing

I feel like he'd beat himself up on it

(Also fucking love your courting works, I've been eating that shit up its become a hyperfixation)

- ☕️ Anon

I reckon that staring would be less of a wraith thing and more of a Simon thing. Because like, wraiths don't reproduce, they're made not born. So poor Simon just has to try to use the knowledge he had before he died.

CW:NSFW subbot ghost, topdom reader, rough and quick

He likes you.

Just like he's a Riley, just like the sky is blue, his affection for you is one of the few truths of the world he doesn't question. Only problem — he doesn't know how to tell you. You're not human and neither is he, not anymore, but he's woefully unprepared when it comes to you, doesn't know if he's supposed to go about it as a wraith or as a man.

He tries; Simon's phone is full of open tabs containing every piece of information about your species, trying to find grains of truth in the contradicting mess of words. He's memorized how you like your morning coffee down to the last flake of sugar, watching your face carefully when you trudge to the communal kitchen to find your mug steaming and everything laid out near it. He knows your schedule inside out, always a few minutes earlier in the gym when you come in, offering to spot you, his dark eyes roaming over your sweat covered skin. His gaze is always flickering to you, regardless of what you're doing or where you are — watching, guarding, making sure the world doesn't take away that spark like it did with Simon Riley.

But you fail to notice it, him. Or maybe you do but don't care. Don't see him as anything but your teammate, like you should, like he should. God, what is he even doing trying to fucking woo you like some lovestruck Victorian gent. . .

Simon feels like banging his head against the wall.

Maybe then something in his imperceptibly rotten skull will come loose, tumble around in what's left of his brain like a snowball rolling down a hill to form an avalanche, or at least a vestige of a good thought; an idea, something he could use to get out of this rut.

He doesn't go to Price for advice. The old dragon finds him, knows him long enough to figure out when Simon's up to his throat in shite. Price sits down next to him as they watch you and Gaz spar, "Alright, spit it out." Price hums as he lights his cigar.

Simon's lips form a thin line beneath his mask, his fingers gripping the meat of his arm to keep his form stable. His eyes don't stray from you, cataloging every trail of sweat as it rolls down your skin, watching your muscles flex beneath your skin as you throw a punch, making a mental note to show you the mistakes you make in private and—

His shoulders fall, "'m fucked." The words escape him like he'd been punched in the gut.

Price gives him the side eye, looking him up and down. "Doesn't look like you enjoyed it."

"Hah." Simon says in a dry tone. "Always a comedian captain."

Price chuckles, wing spreading out to bump against his shoulder. "Jokes aside," he lets out a small puff of smoke, "You could just tell 'im."

Simon's eyes narrow, "What, not going to suggest I go find some obscure shite ta gift him?" If he could find some concrete information about your species courting habits he would have done so by now, would have happily torn up Heaven and Hell looking for whatever would make you look at him the same way Price looks at Kyle.

"No," Price rolls his eyes, standing up and stretching. "Just go talk to 'im you bloody muppet, going to creep him out if you keep staring like that." He nods his head towards you.

Simon's head is a dark sea of thoughts as he spars with you, tries to make it seem like nothing's wrong but you catch on quick; he's distracted, falling for moves he'd once chastised you for pulling, the edges of his form crackling like the static of a tv, shadowy smoke rising from his blackened arms as he throws a punch that goes wide.

He grunts as you knock him to the ground, your hands on his shoulders to pin him down. "You alright?" You ask, your brows furrowed. "You're not fighting like you usually do."

You can barely see his dark eyes narrow, his body still beneath yours. "I'm fine." He growls out, tries to ignore how the warmth of your body against his makes him feel, nibbling on his nerves like a craving for a drug he can't have.

"Uhuh," You hum, a little confused why he's letting you pin him down so long. "Come on Ghost, you're not getting soft on me are you?" With a huff you attempt to pull away, knowing you couldn't force words out of his mouth.

The sudden lack of your warmth is what forces his body to move before his mind does, shadows shooting out to grab you before congealing back into his arm, pulling you down so his lips can crash on yours.

You grunt into his mouth from the surprise, your eyes wide with surprise. Simon's frozen heart cracks just a bit when you don't respond, only to melt when you finally kiss him back. Your lips feel like heaven against his, Simon's eyes shutting and long tongue slipping into your mouth.

You choke a bit, pulling back to catch your breath, your eyes widening as Simon's long tongue slips back into his mouth. "Fucking hell Simon." You pant,

"Got a whole bag of tricks." Simon says, his throat dry. "I-" He begins to say, thoughts running on how to tell you he wants you but no words coming out, something clogging his throat like molasses.

"Yeah," You grin, the lights overhead casting a halo around your head. "I know." Tipping your head down you catch his lips again, your kiss deep and rough, Simon's teeth digging into your lip until it bleeds, your sharp fangs nipping his tongue, blood mixing in your mouths, arousal starting to course through your veins.

Simon's hands grope your ass, pulling your crotch down on his so your cocks can rub together. Simon greedily swallows your groan, his arms starting to fizzle, shadowy smoke wrapping around you to keep you close as his hand sneaks down to undo your belts, fishing out your cocks.

"Christ," You groan and pant into his mouth, grabbing hold of both of your cocks and rocking your hips into his, pleasure buzzing up your spine.

"Don't bring 'im in here." Simon growls and throws an arm around your neck, demanding your attention with a kiss, longue tongue pushing half way down your throat and hips bucking up to rub his cock against yours. "Just us here."

You moan against his lips and fuck, if that isn't the prettiest sound he's ever heard, his mind clouding over with pleasure and before either one of you knows it Simon's cumming, pulling you down with him, your combined cum painting both of your stomachs.

It takes a few moments for Simon to catch his breath, his pupils blows wide as he stares up at you. "Shite." He breathes out, boneless beneath you.

You grin, "You can say that again." and you lean down to kiss him again.

#gnome correspondence #cod mw2 #x reader #trinkets from the hoard #male reader #top male reader #simon ghost riley #☕anon #simon ghost riley x reader #simon ghost riley x male reader #cod x male reader #cod smut #cod monster au #monster cod au #monster 141 au #cod modern warfare

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awooghan · 4 months

Text

fall in love with me (this christmas) ✧.* h.hj

➳ PAIRING: hyunjin x fem!reader

➳ GENRE: fluff, mild angst, best friends to lovers, christmas

➳ WARNINGS: mild language, mentions of food, hyunjin is tipsy in one part (he and reader are ‘00 or ‘01 tho so they’re legal), UNEDITED (will be fully edited by new years) UPDATE: fully edited as of jan. 19, 2024

➳ WORD COUNT: 22.9k (final wc after editing)

➳ SUMMARY: hyunjin has one last chance to have a college christmas romance and he’ll do anything to have it—even if it means fake-dating his best friend. (inspired by "cold december night" by michael buble)

➳ NOTES: MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!! 🎄❄️ i hope you have/had an amazing day with love ones and good food! this fic is my christmas collab with my bestie @ujimoo :3 some parts r kind of rough bc we didn't fully edit yet but i hope y'all enjoy <3

network tags: @kflixnet @straykidsland-main @kwritersworld

prologue.

– halloween.

You didn’t think the night could get any worse.

The night started from the moment you caught a whiff of beer, sweat, and Dior Sauvage as Hyunjin dragged you by the hand to ‘Jackson’s 2023 Annual Hallo-Wang Party’. You could think of a thousand other ways you wanted to spend your Halloween that didn’t involve being stuck here, but you lost a bet with Chan, so you don’t exactly have a choice.

So here you are, sitting in the kitchen with your now-ruined costume sticking to your skin, thanks to someone (Jeongin) spilling his tequila on you when you were playing beer pong. Now, not only is your head throbbing from the smell of frat party, but you have an ugly pink blotch on the costume you took weeks to put together.

You nurse whatever the concoction of alcohol is the punch when Hyunjin, too tipsy for his own good, slides up next to you and rests his chin on your shoulder.

“Y/NNN~…” he sighs, wrapping his arms around your waist. “There you are!”

Fighting against his hold on you, you’re finally able to get his hands away from your waist, only for him to wrap his arms around your arm like a lost child.

“Why don’t you love me?” he mumbles, hiccuping at the end of his sentence. “Do you hate me?”

A smile tugs at your lips as you turn to look at your best friend. His blond hair falls in front of his eyes as he stares at you. “Of course.”

His nose scrunches in disgust and he shakes his head as your laughter surrounds him. It somehow makes him feel lighter than all of the alcohol he’s drunk combined.

“You’re so mean, why would you say that?” he whines. He grabs your arm tighter and shoves his head on your shoulder.

Exhaling, you pat his head lightly before resting your head on his. It’s like the world goes silent for a moment as you run your fingers through his hair.

You’re both like that for an uncertain amount of time before Hyunjin jumps back up, his arms still around your arm. A large tipsy smile creeps on his face and he suddenly begins to giggle. The way his eyes light up almost makes you do the same.

“I think Jisoo is going to ask me out~” He sighs dreamily. “I feel the vibes, you can feel it too, right?”

You catch the way two of your friends, Changbin and Jisung, are watching you from the kitchen door. Sticking your tongue out at them, they return it with winks, eyeing up both you and Hyunjin.

You turn back to the giggly blond clinging to your arm and shrug. “I’m not sure. I don’t really see her around campus.”

You’re not trying to sound like you’re completely disinterested in what Hyunjin’s saying, but when you already know where it’s heading, you can’t help it. You’re not really sure Hyunjin is even listening though when he sighs to himself and tugs on your arm again.

“This is—” tug. “My chance—” tug. “For my Christmas romance, Y/Nie.” A harder tug. “I can feel it in the air!” Aggressive shaking.

Breaking your arm away from him, you huff. Can’t you have one night before Hyunjin’s constant babbling about Christmas and Christmas romances?

“Can we wait till after Halloween to talk about Christmas, please?” you groan, causing Hyunjin to sneer at you.

“Why do you have to be such a Grinch?” he attempts to whisper—but his intoxicated brain has other ideas.

You attempt to ignore the feeling of his arms sneakily slipping around your waist again and the way his head seems to fit into the dip of your shoulder as you sigh.

“Ask me about it again tomorrow.”

…

You really didn’t think the night could get any worse. But after corralling Hyunjin, who could barely stand on his own, back to his dorm, you were proven wrong. So, so wrong.

When you finally untangle yourself from his hold and hand him off to his poor roommate, Felix, it’s 11:58pm. Normally, you wouldn’t care to watch the clock for something so mundane, but you had a feeling he was going to text you the minute you look away.

And sure enough, the second you leave Hyunjin’s dorm building, you feel your phone vibrate in your hoodie pocket.

Hyunnie : it’s november 1st Hyunnie : it’s christmas time bitch!! Hyunnie : ah Hyunnie : sorry for calling you a bitch… Hyunnie : i got excited TT

You can only roll your eyes fondly. At least it’s November now.

one.

– november 1st.

Hyunjin feels sticky.

Every year he rejoices at the start of the Christmas season, but every year he also forgets that the start is the one part he hates. The morning is so nice and icy-cold, everything sweater weather should be. But by midday… the sweater has to come off. Then he’s sweating in places he shouldn’t be, he’s itching all over, and he’s all grumpy and gross and he just wants to shower twenty times to try and rid himself of the feeling of his clothes clinging to his skin.

He can see his breath just past his nose as he tries to rid his shoes of the mush that is the remains of fallen leaves. He knows he shouldn’t have worn his pristine white sneakers that you had gotten him for his birthday earlier that year (ones that he, not to mention, cleans frantically after every use). But they go so well with his dark grey jeans that he had to! The things he does for his passion for fashion…

When Jisoo first messaged him asking to meet up by the trees, it felt like a dream come true, one he’s been waiting for for so long. But now that he’s here, he’s not sure how long he’s been waiting, but he feels like he’s a Sim with stink lines coming off of him and he wants to scream. His controller must hate him because nothing is going as he planned.

So when he finally sees Jisoo in the distance, he lets out a sigh of relief. He sees her try and keep her bag on her shoulder as she rushes over. When she’s finally in front of him, with strands of hair stuck to her face, her mouth slightly open as she tries to catch her breath… all Hyunjin does is blink.

If you had asked him a week ago, he would have found this adorable. He would have screamed in her face and pinched her cheeks, before running to his dorm and spamming your texts about how Jisoo is the cutest girl he’s ever seen and how his heart has never beaten as fast as it does around her.

But now he’s standing there, with the love of his life right in front of him, and he feels… wrong. There’s murky puddles and soggy leaves surrounding his and Jisoo’s feet, an angry draft blows past his ears as he tries to read Jisoo’s lips, and a stifling blanket that’s the same dirty shade of grey as his dryer lint trap smothers him from overhead. Nothing feels right, he feels icky, and his heart is fluttering for all the wrong reasons. All he wants to do is run off into the sunset, and not with her.

He barely even hears her as the whole world moves in fast forward while he stands there completely still. And he doesn’t even remember what he says before he walks away, his shoulder brushing against Jisoo’s in the process. He doesn’t even turn back when he hears her call out to him multiple times.

He’s sure that when he tells you his over-dramatised version of what he assumes was Jisoo’s confession, you’ll do your exaggerated laugh that makes you snort and then complain that you snorted. You’ll look at him in a way that screams ‘I told you so,’ and he hates it so much that he considers not telling you at all.

But even he knows he’s a blabbermouth and as soon as he lays his eyes on you, the words will fall out of his mouth before he even has a chance to think.

So he goes to the nearest pizza place by your dorm, and he orders your usual: half cheese, half pepperoni. You’re too indecisive to pick just one, so you get both. He orders his own pizza too and he sits and waits, stripping himself of his scarf and his hat before shoving it into his backpack and playing around with his hair, trying to get it to look right before his order is called.

When he’s finally outside your door, he doesn’t bother to knock—he walks straight in and calls out for you. You rush out of your room, an oversized hoodie covering your frame with your hood up.

“Damn it, Hyun, can’t you call before you show up uninvited?” you huff, instantly eyeing up the pizzas. “What would you have done if I wasn’t here?”

Hyunjin shrugs. He knows there’s no way you’d be anywhere else. Your friends are his friends and they’re all in class or with their own significant others… not that that matters…

He hands you your own pizza and smiles at the way you smile when you fall onto the couch and stuff the first slice into your mouth. A muffled ‘thank you’ somehow escapes your lips. Gulping it down, you wipe your mouth with your sleeve, causing Hyunjin to curl his lip in disgust.

“Why are you here, anyway?” you ask before tearing off another bite of pizza.

“No reason.” He’s trying his best to do a Mary-Kate and Ashley and keep his lips sealed, but it’s no use.

You just blink at him until the dam finally bursts.

“Jisoo confessed to me and I turned her down.”

Still blinking, you furrow your eyebrows as you look at him in confusion. “But… isn’t that what you wanted?”

Hyunjin keeps his eyes locked on the pizza slice he’s playing with aimlessly instead of actually eating. He can’t even explain how he’s feeling. He wanted, no, dreamed of the perfect confession, and he blew his chance. Because of… bad vibes? How do you even explain that?

“I… I don’t know,” he mumbles. He sighs, dropping the pizza box on his lap as he throws his head back against the couch to look up at the ceiling. “It just…” He pauses. “It wasn’t what I thought it would be.”

“Is a confession ever going to be perfect, though?”

Hyunjin sits up instantly at the question. The way he moves so suddenly makes you jump, but he doesn’t mean to scare you. He’s just very… passionate… about the subject. ‘Passionate’ may not be enough to describe it.

“Of course it can be!” He has to stop himself from blabbing too much. He’s sure you’re tired of hearing his speeches about this, so he just gives you the short version. “It’s the biggest moment of any relationship! With the right person, it’s always going to be perfect. Like, you know in your heart when it’s right, and…” he sighs, “I didn’t feel that.”

He looks at you, and you nod. “Then… maybe you didn’t like her as much as you thought you did?”

Hyunjin falls against the couch again. His voice comes out as a whine this time, “But that was my last chance at a Christmas romance!”

Is he being dramatic? Maybe a little, Hyunjin figures. He’s just lucky it’s you he’s ranting to, because the most you do in response to this is huff and give him a look. If it was one of mutual friends, they would have slapped some sense into him by now. Metaphorically, at least… hopefully.

“This isn’t your last chance at a Christmas romance, you know that right?” you say. “You’re acting like this is your last Christmas, period.”

He sinks somehow further into the couch. “Okay, fine.” He crosses his arms over his chest. “My last college Christmas romance.”

“You didn’t have one last year? Why does it matter now?” you ask, reaching once more for your pizza.

“Because it’s our final year!! That’s kind of the point of it being the final chance, Y/N.”

Hyunjin knows you mean well, but you rolling your eyes at him as you shove another bite into your mouth isn’t helping his plight. He can’t help but frown at you, though, not only because of your reaction, but now because you’re talking with your mouth full.

“Here’s an idea,” you gulp down some of the pizza stuffed in your cheeks, “just fake it till you make it. Get someone to fake date you.”

It takes a second for Hyunjin to process what you say. But when he does, he gasps loudly and sits up even faster than last time. He turns and grabs hold of your shoulders so fast that it takes all of your force not to fall backwards.

“You’re a genius!”

You smirk, shrugging your shoulders. “I know. No need to remind me.”

The look of disgust returns and Hyunjin slowly moves his hands away from your shoulders like you just infected him with something. “Don’t make me regret saying that.”

“We both know it’s true, though.”

“I hate you.”

“I hate me too.”

He ignores your self-degrading comment and sighs. His arms find their way to cross themselves over his chest once more and he thinks to himself for a minute. He has a world of possibilities at his fingertips, but he knows exactly what he wants to do. Just… he doesn’t know how to say it. Might as well just rip the bandaid.

“So when’s our first fake date?”

You cough out whatever pizza you had left in your mouth and it takes you a moment to catch your breath again. When you finally have a moment to breathe, you look at Hyunjin. “Our what?!”

Hyunjin simply blinks at you. He just asked the most obvious question in the world, and you’re looking at him like you just asked him to solve a derivative. He doesn’t even remember what that is.

You motion for him to continue, but he’s still blinking. “What?” he says.

“When I suggested fake dating someone, I didn’t mean me!”

“Of course it has to be you!” he frantically tries to explain. “I-I can’t just ask a random person to fake date me when I have no idea who they are!”

“So you just assume I’d say ‘yes’?!”

“Oh, come on, please!” he begs, actually getting down on the floor in front of you. He links his hands together as he whips out his best puppy dog eyes.

He waits and goes still and keeps giving you that cartoonish pleading stare. Then, you sigh.

“I feel like I get nothing out of this. You get your fake Christmas romance and what do I get? A fake boyfriend I didn’t ask for?”

He goes still again. He thinks hard about anything that will get you to agree. He’ll pull out the big guns, if he has to. And that’s what he does, and based on the terrified look on your face, he’s sure he has a crazed gleam in his eyes when he says it.

“I’ll never complain about not having or finding a Christmas romance again!”

Hyunjin can’t believe he said that. You stare at him, he’s staring at you. He’s sure you don’t believe him.

“Come on!” he huffs. “Don’t look at me like that!”

“You can’t keep anything to yourself, you really believe you’d be able to keep that?”

Hyunjin nods frantically.

“I can’t believe I’m doing this,” he hears you mutter before looking him in the eyes. “Fine. I’ll do it.”

Hyunjin’s up in another flash, pushing you with all his weight against the couch as he hugs you even tighter.

“THANK YOU!! You’re the best!!”

And in the next moment, he’s standing, his hand out for you to take. “Let's go!” A confident beam is plastered on his face. He can’t say the same for you.

“Huh?”

You just keep staring at his outstretched hand. Knowing you’re not going to move, Hyunjin just huffs and grabs your hand, pulling you to the front door.

“On our first date, decorating your dorm!!”

“HUH?!”

—

As you walk through the store, Hyunjin has his fingers entwined with yours so tightly that you almost think he’s cutting off blood flow. It’s almost as if he was afraid you’d change your mind and disappear if he let go.

He beelines towards the Christmas decorations. You don’t know why he insisted on buying more when you still have the stuff that he made you get last year—you just forgot where you put it. But you live in a tiny college dorm, so it’s not like you had many places to look.

It’s whatever, you guess. You don't bother to question what’s going through his mind right now. It won’t end well if you do.

Hyunjin’s other hand is pushing an extra large cart you're sure you don’t need, but he got it anyway. He can’t possibly be thinking of filling up the whole cart, can he? You live in a college dormitory. Only so much can fit.

After what seems like a lifetime, you’re both in front of the Christmas decorations. With his hand still stuck to yours like glue, he starts to examine each set of decorations with his other hand, holding it up close to his eyes as if he doesn’t have perfect vision.

“What are you doing?” you ask.

“Checking,” he mutters, placing a box of lights back down on the shelf before picking up another one.

“Checking for…?”

He huffs, drops his shoulders, and stares at you with nothing behind his eyes. “The perfect lights. They shouldn’t be broken and we need to know they’ll shine bright enough.”

“They’re lights, Hyun,” you respond simply. “It doesn’t matter if they’re perfect or not.”

Pushing your lips into a line, you stare at each other in silence for a moment or two—honestly, you’re not too sure how long the moment actually is. Hyunjin just looks away, placing the box of lights back onto the shelf.

“You’re relying too much on everything being perfect.”

You feel the way his grip tightens around your hand. He stays silent, picking up another box of lights before placing them in the shopping cart. “These are perfect,” he says, ignoring your words. “We should get these.”

He pushes the cart further down whilst dragging you along in the process. Picks up another set of lights, checks them, and puts them down, before repeating this a few times before he’s happy with the one he’s decided on. He does this for many of the tinsel, for some random ornaments, and for random chocolates and candy canes to hang on the tree.

You’re fiddling on your phone when he tugs on your hand, causing you to look up at him. In his free hand are two mini stuffed animal ornaments. He’s gazing at them with a look in his eyes you can’t quite place.

“It’s us.” His eyes find yours. There’s a softness to his voice that compliments the warm smile he gives you. “We should get them… they’re perfect.”

This time, you squeeze his hand back. His smile infects you, and you’re unable to do anything but return it. Nodding, you return your gaze back to the two little stuffed ornaments. “They are perfect… like us.”

“There’s that smile I missed so much!” he says sarcastically.

“Aaaand moment ruined.”

You tug at his hand, trying to get them to finally unlink. The sweat forming in between them is getting a bit much.

“You can’t escape from me that easily,” Hyunjin says with a smoulder.

“Ew,” you fake gag. “You’ve been hanging out with Jisung too much. Only he makes the fuckboy thing work, bestie.”

“Bestie- zoned?” Hyunjin gasps, his over-dramatic look you’re so accustomed to taking over his features. “I thought I was your boyfriend?”

Your smile drops and you want to smack him and his teasing into next week. “FAKE boyfriend.”

He turns from you as he hisses to you or himself—you’re not really sure which—before he pulls you further down the aisle.

“You’re no fun.”

two.

– november 3rd.

Looking around your dorm makes you want to throw up.

After Hyunjin took you (read: dragged you) shopping the other day, the boy immediately took the bags of stuff to your dorm and started plastering the stuff everywhere. Now, the room is filled to the brim with golden lights and colourful tinsel, and your little desk tree was just as flashy. Considering that your space is a tiny college dorm, it makes the space feel a bit suffocating, but not unenjoyable.

You fear Hyunjin took “deck the halls” a little too far and that your dorm will catch on fire because of it, not just because of the three separate Christmas candles Hyunjin insisted on buying, but also because of how dangerously close they were to the tinsel. You wonder what your roommate, Yeri, would say about this. Actually, you’re not entirely sure when you last saw her.

You aren’t able to dwell much longer on the thought as a knock followed by a crash and yelp pulls you out of your own head. You hurry to the door and open it to find none other than your Christmas menace, Hyunjin, sprawled on his butt in front of you. Bags with what appear to be baking ingredients are spread all over the ground around him.

“Hey~” is the only thing he says, a sheepish smile on his face, as you stare at him incredulously.

“What’s all this?”

“It’s…” he starts as you help him up, then trails off once he’s upright. He bends down to pick up a bag of chocolate chips by his feet, then he looks at you and holds them out proudly. “…Our next date!”

You roll your eyes fondly at the boy. Of course, he already thought up a second date idea so soon. Knowing him, he’s probably been planning this since he got home after the first date.

But still, you can’t help but crack a smile. Baking cookies seems like a fun little fake date—after all, it’s hard to make Christmas cookies into some sappy Hallmark scene. Plus, you get to keep half the batch at the end.

What could go wrong?

As you help pick up the rest of the ingredients off the floor, you notice a neatly folded piece of paper fall out of Hyunjin’s pocket. You stick it in your pocket before placing a milk carton and a brown sugar pack on the kitchen island, then you take out and unfold the paper, squinting as you read it.

“Is this… Felix’s recipe?” you say. The distinct way he loops his ‘Y’s gives it away for you.

“N… No…” Hyunjin tries to convince you, but his statement comes out as more of a question than a definitive answer.

You give him another incredulous look.

“Okay, fine, it is!” he huffs, throwing his head back dramatically. “I begged him for the recipe so we could try to make it together. His cookies always come out great, so it can’t be that hard!” He grins confidently, but that facade quickly fades. “…Right?”

A smile returns to your lips. “Right! Yeah!” You’re afraid your smile looks more nervous than confident, though. “Totally…”

“We can do it! I think…”

Hyunjin laughs a little, and you follow too, even if it feels somewhat forced.

“And if we fail, we’ll just get the store-bought ones!” he adds. “Easy as pie.” A small smile dances on his lips. “Anything for my favourite girlfriend~” he sings, winking at you playfully.

Any hint of your smile, real or not, drops at the sentence.

“Fake girlfriend.”

“Potayto, potahto. Now help me with the batter.”

…

“Are you sure you’re doing this right?” you say.

Instead of jumping into baking right away, you and Hyunjin have spent the past ten minutes overwhelmed over the instructions Felix provided. It’s not that they’re difficult or anything—fifteen steps to make some cookies just feels like a lot.

Especially to two beginners, one of which is struggling to cut a one-pound stick of butter in half with a cleaver. You’re left to watch Hyunjin nearly slice his fingers as he tries, a near-grimace twisted on your face.

“I got it, I got it!” Hyunjin grunts as he tries to push the cleaver down. “Almost… there…”

The way his fingers are so dangerously close to the blade makes you wince. After another moment, you can’t take watching him anymore.

“Oh my god, give me the knife.”

In hindsight, it was probably a bad idea to shoo Hyunjin away from the cleaver while he’s holding it for dear life. Knowing him, he could’ve found a way to cut himself even after he let go. Luckily, you both remain unscathed and you successfully cut the butter in half.

“What’s next?” Hyunjin asks as he watches you cut one of the halves. He peeks at the recipe over your shoulder.

You scan the paper for the next step, moving it quickly so he can see, too. “Looks like the… dry ingredients? We can start with the flour, I guess.”

“Flour…”

Hyunjin hums along with “Santa Tell Me” by Ariana Grande as he digs through the ingredient pile on the island. You glance up and find yourself giggling at the silly hand gestures he makes.

“Flour coming right…” he announces, letting out a grunt as he lifts the giant bag, “…up!”

You set the cleaver aside and rush to help him carry the bag. “Why’d you buy the ten kilogram bag?!”

“I didn’t know how much we needed!” He lets out a dramatic huff once you both get the bag on a stool.

“I’m pretty sure a normal-sized bag would have been enough, Hyun.”

“Look,” Hyunjin huffs again and runs a hand through his hair, “I’ve learned from Felix, alright? This is serious cookie and movie date business and we can’t make mistakes.”

Fake cookie date.

“But there’s going to be mistakes, that’s just how it is.” You shrug, carefully opening the bag, then letting out a sigh as a lump of flour falls out onto the floor. “Just think, Felix’s recipes weren’t perfect straight away—”

Hyunjin cuts you off with a gasp. A hand flies over his heart as he stares at you with betrayal. “Excuse you, they’ve always been great. You’re lucky I wouldn’t tell him you said that.”

You decide not to say anything else, but get the flour ready to sieve into the mixture. “Do you want to do this or I?”

Even though he still has too much energy, he gently pushes you out of the way and takes the sieve from your hands. “Me, me, me.”

Without bothering to do anything else, he takes a handful of flour and dumps it into a sieve and starts tapping at the side of it.

“Hyunjin!” you gasp, “We could at least measure it first!”

“Live a little, Y/N!” Hyunjin sways to the music. “You said nothing has to be perfect right away! I’m trying to follow your advice.”

You blink, half-laughing, half-scoffing. “I didn’t mean to not follow the recipe! We still have to, you know.”

Hyunjin doesn’t say anymore, he just continues to sieve the flour into the bowl. However, by the bridge of the song, he’s so into it that he’s nearly forgotten what he’s doing. While he goes on autopilot, the flour soon enough misses the bowl entirely and lands on the kitchen counter and over his shoes.

“Oops,” he giggles.

“I’m baking with a child,” you mutter to yourself, arms crossed over your chest.

He picks up another handful of the flour and looks down at the mixture before looking over at you. He stares at you, you stare at him. It’s like a silent battle.

“Don’t you dare.”

He does dare. However, instead of throwing it at you, he throws it up; and instead of landing on you directly, it falls lightly to the floor, just barely falling into your socks. He grins and a giggle escapes his lips.

Whatever self-control you have leaves you at that moment and you grab your own handful of flour. As you step forward, he steps back, causing you to raise an eyebrow.

“You’re not scared… are you?” you question.

He scoffs. “Me? Scared?” He fakes a cackle. “Never!”

You take another step forward. He takes another back.

“So you wouldn’t mind if I—”

Rushing forward, you push your hand into his cheek, letting the flour fall from your hand and over him. Some of the remnants left on his cheek fall as he huffs.

“That’s it.” He grabs another scoop. “You’re on.”

You have exactly two seconds to decide what to do before Hyunjin stalks toward you, a mischievous grin on his face and handful of flour held high. You turn and start to scramble away from him right as he pounces, trying to grab you so he can dump the flour on your head.

“What’s wrong, Y/N?” He giggles tauntingly. “Don’t you want a hug from your loving boyfriend~?”

“Fake boyfriend!” you call over your shoulder.

Trying desperately not to trip, you make a mad dash for the living room, Hyunjin’s cackles ring in your ears as he bounds closer. You get two more big steps in and just as you’re about to leap for the couch, a strong arm wraps itself around your middle and pulls you back.

“Got you~” Hyunjin’s voice is right next to your ear and you can practically hear him smirking in victory. You wriggle around, trying to free yourself but it’s to no avail.

You’re able to turn just enough to face him and send him the glare he deserves. He just faces you, narrowing his eyes for a second, then that look falls to a more disapproving one.

“Are you ready to follow the recipe now?” the boy asks sassily.

You want to smack his pretty face so bad.

“I hate you.”

…

Surprisingly, Hyunjin keeps his word and actually follows Felix’s recipe, word-for-word. You’re happy with how the balls of cookie dough turned out, even though you just placed them in the oven—and don’t tell Hyunjin, but you ate a bit of the dough. It’s too good.

“And now we wait twelve minutes,” you declare as you start a timer on your phone. You leave it on the island and head over to the living room.

You watch, baffled, as Hyunjin spreads out tattered-looking physical copies of a bunch of Christmas movies over your coffee table. Once they’ve landed in a heap, he turns back and looks at you, the same way a dog does when it thinks it's done something incredible.

To say you’re confused as to why he brought over DVDs when you could just rent the movies online is an understatement. Especially when he knew full well that you somehow had access to Chan’s Netflix account—you hacked it, but is it really hacking when his password is ilovefelix143?

Hyunjin’s eyebrows basically merge. Instead of being a little happy puppy, he’s now like a puppy with his tail stuck between his legs. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

Your eyes shift from him to the movies and back.

“You…” sigh. “You know we have Netflix, right?”

“That’s not the same thing,” he whines. “And you know it! The vibe will be totally off if we watch them all on Netflix!”

You might as well be a fan of BlackPink because all you can do is blink. “And it won’t be if we watch them on DVD?”

Rising his fist, Hyunjin grabs your shoulder to shake you lightly. As you attempt to push him away, his grip somehow gets tighter.

“Just pick,” shake. “one to,” he tugs your arm. “ start with!”

“Alright!” You huff, flailing your arms around to finally get him to drop his grip. You point in a random direction. “That one!”

It’s his turn to blink. “You’re not pointing at shit and you know it.”

…

With a movie finally picked out, the title screen theme of The Muppets’ Christmas Carol begins to repeat as Hyunjin is in the kitchen getting the cookies out of the oven. However, after the fifth repeat, you’re ready to pull your hair strand by strand from your head.

“Are you almost ready?!” you call out to him. “This music is driving me insane!”

Part of you wants to complain more, but you bite your tongue. It could’ve been worse—it could’ve been the theme of When Harry Met Sally on repeat.

Hyunjin appears at the door, tray in hand. “You can’t really go mad if you’re already there.”

If it wasn’t a threat to the precious cookies currently residing in the tray in his hands, you would have thrown every pillow on this couch at him.

“You say I’m mean to you, but then this is how you treat me!” You gasp, watching as he rolls his eyes.

You catch the way his lip turns up into a smirk when he sets down the tray of cookies on the coffee table.

“I’m so sorry my precious girlfriend, whom I care so deeply about, how can I ever repay you?”

It’s go time. Grabbing the pillow, you aim and whack him over and over as he falls onto the couch, his arms up in protest, but his laughter is still loud enough to seep into your ears. “Not the face! I’m too beautiful to die this young!”

“I,” whack. “hate,” you huff and raise the pillow above your head. “you,” whack. “so much!”

He somehow grabs the pillow, pulling it towards him. But with his strength, he accidentally pulls you forward, causing you to fall onto his chest. Like on instinct, his arms wrap around you tightly to stop you from falling off of the couch.

You feel his breath on your ear as he lets out a chuckle and it makes a tingle run up your spine.

“I know you love me.”

You’re up in a flash, using all of your strength to push him off of the couch and onto the floor.

“AHH!!!”

You snicker at the loud shriek Hyunjin makes. Plopping your bum on the couch, you shoot your fake boyfriend a petty stare as you reach for a cookie and, very slowly, take a huge bite.

Holy shit. You’ve never tasted a cookie so good before. The way the gooey, melty goodness dances in your mouth is so addictive, you barely notice Hyunjin giving you a death glare from the floor.

“What?” you say with your mouth full, reaching for the remote.

“That’s supposed to be our batch,” he sneers nasally, as if he’s Squidward himself. You try not to spit out the food in your mouth.

“Not anymore.” You point the remote at the TV and hit ‘play’. “You can get the next batch.”

three.

– november 10th.

“Can we let go for a bit?” you mumble, causing Hyunjin to look at you. “My hand is getting sweaty.”

“Oh, sorry,” Hyjnjin gasps, looking down at your hands. He lets go and rubs his palm against his jeans to wipe off the stickiness that has formed.

“Why are we holding hands so early, anyway?” you ask. “I know we’re telling the guys we’re ‘dating’ today, but they’re not even here yet.”

Hyunjin blinks at you, takes your hand again, and entwines your fingers. “Because we have to make it look believable from a distance.”

You try not to laugh. “You think they’ll even notice if we’re holding hands?”

He shrugs, locking eyes with the student worker that’s staring in your general direction. He attempts to follow their gaze. It seems like they’re looking at his and your hands. They could also just be waiting for the microwave oven to ding so they can serve someone their bagel. You never know, though.

“I mean,” he gestures to the cafe worker, “if that person notices, then our friends probably will.”

You raise an eyebrow. “I don’t think that person cares.”

“For Hyunjin?” another cafe worker calls.

With your hand still in his, Hyunjin gently pulls you with him to pick up a freshly-made sandwich for you, and bagel for him. He mumbles a ‘thank you’ before grabbing some napkins and heading for the seating area, scooting past students to the table for four he set his backpack on to call dibs. When the college cafe is always packed for lunch, claiming a table was more than necessary.

Hyunjin presses a finger to his chin as he thinks of where to sit, which chair will allow him optimal coupley vibes. After a moment of contemplation, he chooses one of the seats right by the window.

This prompts you to move to the one opposite of him. But before you can sit down, Hyunjin reaches across the table to grab your wrist.

“No! Sit on this side,” he says, gently tugging your arm.

“Why?”

“I told you, we have to make it believable! Remember?”

It’s a perfect plan. If Hyunjin acts as utterly sappy as possible, his and your friends will surely fall for it. What better way to scream ‘lovesick college couple’ than to sit on the same side of the table together?

Also, how do you hold hands with someone who’s sitting across from you? Spoiler: you don’t.

But for now, you both eat. You plop down on the chair next to Hyunjin, albeit begrudgingly at first, and you end up finishing your sandwich fairly quickly. Hyunjin, however, takes his time. Not because he’s not hungry—he’s starving. But having half a bagel to work his way through is good in case things get awkward later on.

See? Perfect.

Soon enough, Hyunjin catches two familiar heads enter the cafe. He reaches for your hand under the table, lacing his fingers with yours when you take his hand with a sigh. He even considers subtly scooting his chair over to be even closer to you. Something in the dark crevices of his mind keeps begging him to do it. He’s not even sure why, but he scolds at that voice to wait a moment.

His eyes carefully follow Changbin and Jisung as they get out of line. They both wave at him, and he awkwardly waves back before they turn to each other.

After what feels like an eternity, Changbin steps up to the counter to grab two bagels. Then he follows Jisung to your table.

“What’s up, sweetcheeks?” Jisung says.

Hyunjin glances at you and when you look back, you make an expression as if to tell him ‘go on then’. Hyunjin however, decides against that, turning his attention back to the two boys sitting across from them.

Changbin’s already stuck half of the bagel in his mouth to the point he’s struggling to chew. It’s disgusting, but for some reason it keeps Hyunjin in a trance. When that trance is broken by you swiftly jabbing him in the rib, he winces, glares at you, and looks back over the table.

“About that,” Hyunjin laughs awkwardly. If he wasn’t already holding your hand, he would have gone for it to try and calm his nerves.

“What is it?” Jisung asks, ripping a piece of his bagel off and chucking it into his mouth. “You two finally shacking up?”

Hyunjin sits there stunned, only listening as you groan in disgust.

“What is wrong with you?” you say.

Jisung smiles and sends a wink to you before leaning back in his seat. “It’s just my talent, baby.”

Hyunjin keeps his eyes locked on his bag. This is fake, he repeats in his mind after the word ‘baby’ is uttered from Jisung’s lips. Why does it bother him so much? It shouldn’t bother him—it never has before. This isn’t real. It’s just a simple word Jisung has used to refer to literally everyone in your friend group. Hyunjin’s heard worse come from the boy’s mouth. ‘Sweetcheeks’, ‘’bubby wubby’, schmoopy poopy poo’... all Jisung said this time was ‘baby.’

This is fake.

Hyunjin feels you squeeze his hand. He squeezes it back as he finally looks up. You’re looking at him with your eyebrows furrowed, silently asking him what’s wrong.

This isn’t real…

Now his heart burns. He decides to blame it on too much cream cheese on his bagel.

“What did you want to tell us?” Changbin tries to say as he gulps down his bagel before wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

Hyunjin glances over at you, and then back to his friends. He raises your enjoined hands.

“So… we’re dating!”

Changbin nearly chokes on his bagel at Hyunjin’s words. He looks up slowly, following your and Hyunjin’s arms up to where your hands meet, and he nods once. “Oh. Well, damn.”

Jisung, on the other hand, takes a moment longer to process the news. But when he does, his jaw slowly drops and he takes in a sharp breath. “Oh. My. GO—”

“Yah, shut up!” Hyunjin leans over across the table to slap a hand over Jisung’s mouth.

“…God,” the younger boy finishes his sentence quietly, his voice muffled.

Hyunjin maintains his stare at the younger boy as he slowly begins to pull back. No more screaming, he begs. He’s had enough of it for the rest of the year.

A tension hangs in the air around the four of them. Changbin goes back to carelessly munching on his bagel, and Jisung is gazing at Hyunjin and you, his very fake girlfriend, with an almost-maniacal smile.

“Soooo…” Jisung starts after a minute. Hyunjin can literally feel him gleefully kicking his legs under the table. “Who confessed first?”

Hyunjin pales at the question. He forgot to go over a cover story with you.

Luckily, before he can struggle to give an answer, Changbin swoops in and unknowingly buys him some time.

“Why are you the one who’s happy?” he questions. “I’m the one who won the bet!”

Hyunjin’s eyes widen. “You guys bet on us?!”

“We all did,” Changbin says. “Now Jisung owes half our group ten dollars each.”

“Wait, but we still don’t know who confessed first!” Jisung says.

“Why is that important?” Hyunjin says.

“‘Cause it was part of the bet, too!”

Hyunjin stills again and looks at you helplessly. He squeezes your hand as if to signal that he needs you to come up with something, and fast. Something about how he had the most magical confession to end all confessions during the first snow that didn’t even happen yet this year.

“I-It was me,” you finally say.

Hyunjin has to stop himself from looking at you in surprise.

Jisung gasps loudly again. He’s so wholly entranced, Hyunjin doesn’t know how lucky he should consider himself for it. “Really?”

Hyunjin watches as you clear your throat before nodding. You smile in a way that he swears he’s never seen before. You tilt your head and break your eye contact with Jisung to look over at him, then you look back at Jisung.

“You expect him to confess?” You giggle lightly, gesturing to Hyunjin. “All he talks about is how he wants someone to confess to him.”

The two boys across from them are just nodding in agreement. That is true, Hyunjin thinks. He’s probably been talking about that since he started college, maybe even before. He can’t really describe the feelings that come from somebody confessing their feelings to you.

“And…” you continue, “after the failed confession with Jisoo, I realised I should take it as a sign to confess.”

You’re smiling to yourself as you shrug your shoulders, keeping your eyes down on the table. Hyunjin has never seen you act—and act this well. Jisung and Changbin are totally hooked, nodding along to everything you’re saying. They’re like two little children listening to a bedtime story doing everything they can to stay awake. You’ve got them wrapped around your pinky finger.

Hyunjin’s gaze focuses on your hand in his. He brings them to his lap and begins to play with your fingers, letting your words between the boys fade into the background. His mind is still lingering around the thoughts of Jisoo and the failed confession.

He still isn’t completely sure what happened there. Why his crush, whom he was sure he was in love with, faded so quickly and so suddenly. He never thought falling out of like—or love—with someone could be that easy… but if he thought about it too much, he’d probably worry about the possibility of love. He decides that’s not a thought for now.

“Woah,” Jisung says, his mouth hanging open. “That’s crazy.”

“That means you owe us another five dollars, genius,” Changbin says.

Jisung quickly turns to Changbin. “Let me grieve for my wallet first!” Hyunjin watches as Jisung rests his head in his hands in despair.

“Why would you even bet on Hyunjin confessing first?” You can’t help but laugh. “You set yourself up for failure.”

“Because maybe I had faith in him!!” Jisung exclaims, looking up at you. “I thought he’d have it in him!”

You glance at Hyunjin, smile sheepishly, and look back at the two boys that sit across the table from you.

“Well you should have known him better.”

“Ooookay,” Hyunjin says, suddenly moving to stand. “We, um, we gotta get going.” He turns to you, hoping you get the message. “Right, Y/N?”

You nod quickly and stand up too. “Yeah, we were gonna have a study date together,” you say as you gather your things.

“Okay, have fun,” Changbin says coolly.

“But we were just getting started!” Jisung counters.

Hyunjin lets out a sigh. “We’ll tell you guys everything tomorrow, okay?”

Jisung’s eyes narrow and he raises an eyebrow. The way he’s staring Hyunjin down is making him want to shrink up and hide.

After a moment of awkwardness on Hyunjin’s part, Jisung opens his mouth to speak.

“Tell us everything?”

“Define ‘everything’, Ji,” you respond before Hyunjin has the chance to.

“Everything means everything,” Jisung drawls out. “Like, come on guys, give us the details! The nitty gritty of it all!” He’s now leaning over the table as he pleads. “I just wanna know all about my two best friends’ relationship! Is that so weird?!”

You share a look with Hyunjin. You’re giggling, rolling your eyes as you look back over at the boy. “Find your own girlfriend, Ji, don’t live through our relationship.”

Jisung huffs, falling back into his chair with his arms crossed. “You guys are no fun.”

“We’ll see you tomorrow,” you say, and you both wave at the two boys. Changbin happily responds and Jisung, still grumpy, begrudgingly waves back.

Luckily, this seems to be enough for you and Hyunjin to leave. Hyunjin swings your hands lightly, fingers still entwined, as the cafe door shuts behind you with a small squeak.

There is no study date. There wasn’t really any regular ‘date’ planned—not unless the confessing? lying? to your friends counts.

Regardless, you and Hyunjin look at each other and silently agree. You both deserve a sweet treat after that.

four.

– november 17th.

You wouldn’t dare tell Hyunjin, but once he told you about his “fantastical Friday date idea” earlier this afternoon, you’ve been feeling like a bottle of Coke about to explode.

Sure, he’s been a little crazy about hitting all the stereotypical Christmas romance activities, but this is ice skating! It’s fun and it’s romantic enough to scratch Hyunjin’s itch, but not too romantic. You’re only fake-boyfriend and fake-girlfriend, after all.

“Y/N?”

Hyunjin waves a hand in front of your face, bringing you out of your daze. You must have been staring at the fake icicles for too long.

“Huh? Yeah?” you say, blinking a few times.

He holds up two pairs of rental ice skates, one for you and one for him. “I already paid, let’s go put these on.”

You wander over to the benches where other skaters are lacing up. They make it look so effortless, but you and Hyunjin keep getting your fingers tangled in the long laces. And every time you attempt to stand up, your ankles feel so wobbly that you have to sit back down and tighten them.

Eventually, your skates feel secure enough that you don’t wobble too much when you do make it to your feet. You look over at Hyunjin, who doesn’t look like he’s faring any better than you.

“Do you think you can get up?” you ask. You’re starting to figure out how to balance, but you hold on to the edge of a table just in case.

“Yeah,” Hyunjin hums confidently. However, the deer-in-headlights look on his face as he slowly lifts his bum off the bench says otherwise. You’d laugh at him more than you already are if you didn’t do the same.

“Are you sure you can get up?”

“Totally!”

As if to prove you wrong, Hyunjin slowly begins to stand up. When he’s upright, he lifts one hand off the bench, then the other. Then he slowly shuffles one foot after the other in the direction of the rink, until he loses balance and nearly falls into the splits.

You try not to snort at his cry that echoes throughout the rink. Of course, you do the same as you try to follow him and your dear best friend returns the favour.

“HAH! Karma!” Hyunjin points and laughs at you before slipping and falling on his back.

“Hyunjin!” you exclaim, shuffling over to help him up.

“I’m fine!” he tries to reassure you once he’s upright again. He reaches for your hand as he waddles his way to the rink, this time successfully, and with you in tow.

You let out the breath you’re holding once your other hand finds the edge of the wall. Maybe you came into the rink too cocky, or maybe the old couple doing laps around you and Hyunjin made this look easy.

After you recenter yourself—well, after trying to—you look at Hyunjin, who has a death grip on your hand. “Are you okay?”

“Yep!” The boy smiles. “Very fine!” He slowly lets go of your hand, attempting to get away from the wall. He’s successful for a few seconds, then he finds himself wobbling again and he quickly grabs onto your arm.

Giggling, you try to shake him off. “Hyun, you’re gonna make me fall, too!”

He doesn’t respond for a beat. When you turn to look back at him, his legs are shaking, but he’s got a stupid smirk plastered on his face. Even when he’s visibly struggling, of course he has to do this.

“Oh, am I?”

You roll your eyes. “Oh, fuck off.”

You try to free your hand again. Somehow, his grip gets even tighter, and he manages to slide his hand down your arm and thread his fingers with yours.

“You’re gonna be wishing you’re holding my hand soon enough,” Hyunjin muses.

“Whatever you say, fake boyfriend,” you sigh sarcastically.

The old couple passes you by again; they seem to be out-skating every couple on the ice by this point. As they go in circles together, they show off their best disco moves as if they were on roller skates instead. The old man, as he swings past you two a second time, makes a heart with his hands behind the old woman, pumping it in the air to the beat of “Mistletoe” by Justin Bieber as his wife continues to dance.

You don’t look back at Hyunjin, but you can imagine the stars in his eyes as he watches them. Instead, you pay attention to the way they move their feet. Push out with your right foot, then with your left. Right, left, right, left. With Hyunjin still gripping on tightly to your hand, you attempt to copy it.

“H-Hey!” Hyunjin squeaks from behind you. “What are you doing?!”

“Trying to get off the wall!” you say. You turn your head to look at him briefly. “You want to be a cute fake couple like those two,” you gesture to the old couple, “right?”

He stumbles over a ‘maybe’, but there’s no denying the way he wistfully watches the old man carefully spin the old woman.

You smile fondly. “Then come on. Watch how they move and try to do the same.”

It takes several laps and several more minutes to get into a rhythm. You can’t say that you’re gliding across the ice, but you’re holding your own without clinging to the wall. Barely. Hyunjin, on the other hand, suddenly seems like a natural. His graceful strides make you question if he was feigning clumsiness half an hour ago, or if he was just that good.

You try to catch up to him as you both make a turn and he looks back to check on you. He smiles at you and holds up a peace sign, flashing you a wink—and you freeze. You were already using all your brainpower to remember to keep moving your feet, and just like that, you forget everything you’re doing.

By the time you snap out of your daze, you’re about to crash into Hyunjin. You yelp, flailing as you try to brake. Hyunjin tries to catch you before you fall flat on your face, but you end up pulling him down with you and falling backwards.

Then you realise the position you’re both in. You’re on your back, and Hyunjin is half on top of you. You’re trying to catch your breath, but the way he tries to prop himself up with his elbows somehow sucks the air out of your lungs all over again.

“Hyun, slow down,” you say as he almost slips again. You catch his arms in yours and lose your breath for a third time. “One foot at a time, okay?”

You swear Hyunjin spaces out as you speak—there’s a gleam in his eyes you can’t quite place. But the gleam goes away just as quickly as it came, and he begins to regain his balance enough to stand up.

He holds out his hands for you and you grab on. He then slowly pulls, allowing you to find a way to get up with a pair of blades on your feet.

When you’re nearly upright, you take a wrong step and feel yourself flying backwards. You flail your arms as you try to prepare to land, but you feel Hyunjin’s arm wrap around your waist and pull you in just in time.

For a second, you feel like you’re in a cheesy Disney movie. The moment happened so fast, but feels so slow in hindsight. Now you’re here, your jaw dropped open in surprise, as your hands find their way to Hyunjin’s shoulders. Is this how Cinderella or something felt—

Wait, what the fuck?

“Are you okay?” Hyunjin says. His eyes search yours for any sign of hurt.

You take a beat to respond, nodding rapidly. “Y-Yeah, I’m okay.”

Hyunjin nods once. “Oookay. Do you wanna keep going?”

Right there, you contemplate just packing up and going back to your dorm. Even though the only one staring at you is Hyunjin, it feels like a thousand pairs of eyes are boring into your soul.

However, something in your heart, or maybe your brain, begs you to stay. So you nod.

five.

– november 20th.

Hyunjin stands and leans against the stairrail by the front of the university library. He’s too busy fiddling with his perfectly curated Christmas playlist, fall in love with me (this christmas), to even notice you pull up in your car. So when you honk the horn, he yelps and falls on his butt, then down a couple stairs, before sending daggers your way.

He watches as your passenger side window rolls down slowly and your shit-eating grin becomes clear from behind it.

“You ready to go?” you ask.

Hyunjin, still glaring at you, slowly nods his head in response.

“Then get off your ass!” you say. “You’re the one that wanted to go to this!”

He gets up with a dramatic huff and drags himself to the passenger seat of the car. The second he hops in, he leans forward and grabs your aux cord, plugging it into his phone and unlocks his phone, once again showing the Christmas playlist.

Meanwhile, you watch him in amusement. “You want aux?”

Hyunjin rolls his eyes at your sarcasm. But he answers regardless, too excited about the idea of a Christmas tree farm date. Another thing from his bucket list of Christmas dates to check off.

“Of course I want aux!”

Clicking shuffle, he cheers to himself when the mystical violin intro of “Christmas Tree Farm" by Taylor Swift begins to play. Clicking twice to make the song repeat, he locks his phone before placing it in one of the free cup holders.

“This is perfect!” He claps to himself, swaying the best he can to the music as he fastens his seat belt. “🎶And I’m somewhere else… just like magic… 🎶” he sings along.

He looks over at you and you’re watching him again. This time he can’t tell if it’s in amusement or bafflement. “Can we go now?”

Hyunjin nods, leaning back into his seat with a content smile. “You could’ve started when I got into the car.”

He lets his gaze linger on you for a second. When you look at him, he quickly looks away. Maybe he’s too impatient, but when he looks back at you a moment later to see if you have finally turned your focus to the road in front of you, you’re still staring right at him.

His cheeks begin to feel warm. Your gaze is practically peering into his soul, and you have your heater on full blast—it feels like a sauna in here. It’s not his fault you get cold so easily. It’s also not his fault a little voice in his head is telling him to use it as an excuse to be near you…

No. Bad Hyunjin.

He quickly shoves the thought away into a neat little box, something future Hyunjin will have to deal with. Right now, all present-day Hyunjin cares about is Miss Swift playing through the speakers.

And so he starts humming, which soon turns to quiet singing. Soon enough, the quiet singing soon turns into full-blown yelling of the lyrics. He’s here for the vibe, and the vibe is immaculate.

“🎶AND YOU WOULD BE THERE TOOOO~!!🎶”

Good Hyunjin!

“Hyun, shut up! I can’t see the road!” you shout, your voice carrying over the music.

Hyunjin throws his head back in feigned agony. “Okayyy, okay!” he groans before bringing it down to quiet singing for the rest of the song.

When the music fades out, it’s silent for a moment. Hyunjin feels his cheeks hurt from how much he’s smiling. When it starts again, he bounces in his seat.

“Again?” you question, bringing his attention back to you. “Can’t we go to the next song?”

He gasps and shakes his head. “Nuh-uh! It’s for the vibe, Y/N!” He nods slowly to emphasise his point. “The vibe!”

You nod, your face full of confusion. “And the vibe is…?”

“That we’re literally going to a Christmas tree farm! Do you know how exciting that is?!” Hyunjin turns right to you as you pull up to a stop sign. He almost gets lost in your eyes when you look back at him. “It’s one of the key Christmas dates in the movies! And there’s a whole song about it!” He lets himself ramble on for a minute, trying not to get too lost in his fantasies. Despite his efforts, he soon feels himself about to spiral…

Then you look away.

Hyunjin lets out a sigh as he glances over at you. You’re focused on the road, your eyes flickering around as you wait for a good time to merge lanes. He knows that you only looked away to continue driving, but deep down, he fears that he pushed you away with his babbling.

He just looks down at his lap before he speaks, his voice trembling slightly. “Look, I… I know you hate Christmas, but—”

“I don’t hate Christmas…”

Hyunjin is surprised he can hear you with how quietly you’re talking.

“I…” You sigh. “I just don’t understand why you’re so obsessed with this ‘Christmas romance’ thing. Like, what makes it more special than a romance-romance?”

“Because…” He takes a breath before releasing it. “Christmas is magical.”

The song ends. He reaches for his phone and his finger hovers over the pause button.

“Hyunnie, you don’t need to stop the—”

He stops the music, ignoring the sigh you let out when you do.

“It’s just…” he starts, then trails off. “I…”

A beat of silence.

“You…?”

Hyunjin looks at you, trying to read your reaction. It’s hard to tell if your furrowed brow is from concentration or confusion.

“Like…” he starts again, then he sighs.

How would he even begin to explain that the warm, fuzzy feeling he gets from Christmas, is one he’s only ever experienced secondhand? How is he supposed to tell you that he hopelessly projects onto an array of chiselled brunet men in cheesy holiday movies without sounding insane? That he dreams of taking walks in the snow and under the Christmas lights and in Christmas tree farms with someone, like all the male leads on the Hallmark channel seem to do? Will it seem naive? Or childish?

At the same time, though, if all these ordinary guys can find love without even trying… who’s to say he can’t, too?

“It’s… like… why wouldn’t you want that, you know?”

But of course, Hyunjin’s feelings are so grand that he can’t find the words to explain it.

You let out a sigh again, a more sympathetic one this time. “I… I guess? I…”

Hyunjin watches you carefully as you find your words. He realises, a few moments later, that he’s holding his breath. Why is he holding his breath? It’s as if this is a big deal. But it’s not. It’s just you.

You shrug, and something in him twists. “I– I don’t know. I just… I can’t see it for myself.”

A thick silence hangs in the air. It seems to taunt Hyunjin, pointing and laughing at him like the playground bully for even daring to open his mouth. He bites his tongue for another moment or two, thinking of a way to lessen the tension. But after that, he can’t bear the silence anymore.

The song begins again. Maybe he was right to feel like a child.

…

By the time you park, the mood inside the car is much colder than the weather outside it. Hyunjin shuts the door behind him and lets it slam, even though he knows you’ll be annoyed about it. He shoves his hands inside his jacket pockets and hides himself the best he can in the collar of his coat.

In a moment, you’re next to him. Your own hands in your pockets as you silently glaze over the mass of trees that seem to go on for miles. You both stand there for an uncertain amount of time, just utterly blown away by the amount of Christmas trees.

In the corner of his eye, Hyunjin notices you hold out your hand in front of him and leave it there. He stares at it wordlessly, and after a moment or two of nothing, you make grabby hand motions at him like a small child.

“What?” he questions quietly. When he finally looks over at you, you’re too busy staring at the lights beyond the entrance to look back.

“Just come on. We’ve got a date to enjoy…” You pause and take a breath. “Boyfriend.”

A breath hitches in the back of his throat. You merely mumbled that last word, but Hyunjin heard it loud and clear. You begin to bring your hand closer to his again, motioning silently for him to take it, and he mentally curses at himself for how quickly his lips twitch up into a small smile.

Slowly, he reaches over and takes your hand in his, linking your fingers together. He uses every fibre of his being not to beam like an idiot.

“Where do we start?” you say, not really aiming the question at anyone.

Hyunjin shrugs. “I mean, we can start with the Christmas trees…”

His comment earns a chuckle from you, then a light punch to the arm. It’s a pity chuckle, but he’ll take what he can get. “No shit.”

Chuckling too, he gently tugs at your hand. “Come on, the Christmas tree farm awaits.”

Hyunjin squeezes your hand lightly as he leads you to the counter. He slips a five-dollar bill in the donation jar before walking in the farm with you. The golden lights of the welcome arch surround him with warmth, just like the feeling of your hand in his, as he makes a beeline for the rows of Christmas trees.

To Hyunjin, you seem content with him guiding you around all of the large Christmas trees, even when he takes longer than necessary to take in the waft of fresh pine coming from a few of them. He tries to hold back at first, but eventually he stops at a tree and comments on how much prettier it would look with a string of colourful lights and candy canes lining its needles. Then you two stop at the next tree, and he babbles about how fun it would be to have a real tree one year.

He’s sure he has stars in his eyes much brighter than the one he’d put on top of a real Christmas tree. And he’s lucky that it’s just you with him and you allow him to ramble on, nodding along as he does so. Every once in a while, he looks at you for your reaction to something he said, and he catches the small smile on your face. Whether it’s at him or the children who chase each other through the gaps between the trees, he doesn’t care. He’s just happy that you’re happy, and indulging in his silly fantasies.

There’s a relaxing aura about being at a Christmas tree farm that Hyunjin never expected. Well, maybe he should’ve expected this from the movies he’s watched, but experiencing the warm atmosphere himself is different than seeing it on a screen. The trees around you two seem to lift the tension from the car off your shoulders. He feels lighter, more at peace. And, more importantly, so do you.

The sun has dipped below the horizon, making way for strings of lights towards the centre of the farm. Lines of a purple hue dip upward to a point that stands taller than all the pine trees that seem to go on for miles. Maybe there’s something there that Hyunjin missed.

The light glow catches your attention, too, and you start walking closer to it, keeping a hold on his hand. You two weave through the rows of Christmas trees until you happen to pass the last row, and you find a spectacle of sparkling lights. Lines of red and white make a tent shape and meet the purple lights at the top. Beneath them, two reindeer made of wire and golden lights greet you. They almost look like they’re cuddling under the tent of red and white—something about it makes Hyunjin’s heart sing.

“Wow…” he whispers to himself.

And somehow, without realising it, words leave your lips softly. Hyunjin is so in awe of the lights, he barely notices. “🎶Under the mistletoe…🎶”

He almost doesn’t feel your head lightly rest against his shoulder. The reindeer… why is it reminding him of you two?

“🎶Watching the fire glow…🎶”

The faint melody makes Hyunjin’s ear perk up, causing him to turn and gaze at you. You’re too immersed in the trees and the occasional giggling child running through to even notice you’re quietly singing “Christmas Tree Farm'' to yourself.

It makes Hyunjin’s heart race just like it did back in the car. However, now, he doesn’t have the car heaters to blame his red cheeks on. He’s thankful you're too absorbed in your own little world to even notice anything going on around you.

“🎶And telling me, ‘I love you’ …🎶”

It’s like whatever is above is blessing him, letting him in on a little secret, in the form of light snowdrops falling from the sky. They land so delicately on your hair and shoulders and there’s a little flicker in your eyes that Hyunjin can’t ignore.

Never once in his life did he think he would see the first snow with someone. But now that he is, the hopeless romantic in him is screaming at him what he should have known all along.

“🎶Just being in your arms…🎶”

There is no big realisation. There is no big freak-out. There’s nothing to unpack or be scared about when his heart swells just that little bit more than usual. As he’s looking at you—still too oblivious to notice—everything just makes sense. There is no need for perfect, there is no need for the unattainable.

All he needs is you.

“🎶Takes me back to that little farm…🎶”

He doesn’t need to second guess himself, or try to convince himself of anything. He just knows. All the stories he was told by his parents, the ones he watched in the movies, every little fairytale that he’s held onto his whole life is true.

Maybe it’s not childish, and maybe he didn’t need to chase his fairytale moment at all.

He already has it.

“🎶Where every wish comes true…🎶”

As you continue to mumble the lyrics to yourself, Hyunjin squeezes your hand, finally bringing your attention back to him.

“Thank you for being here with me.” He smiles sweetly.

Your returning smile makes his heart do laps. “No, thank you.”

He squeezes your hand again. You squeeze his back.

six.

– november 23rd.

It’s only when the mass of people leaving your class dissipates that you notice Hyunjin standing out in the hallway waiting for you. He’s leaning up against the wall, focused on his phone. When he finally looks up and sees you, his smile grows and he pockets his phone, holding a hand out to you.

You raise your eyebrow and glance at his hand for a second too long before he makes grabby hands at you. A giggle escapes your lips. “Why do you want to hold my hand so badly?” You take his hand before he can answer.

“Because my dearest and best girlfriend in the world, it’s time for another date,” he muses, skipping slightly and rocking your entwined hands in a more exaggerated fashion.

Humming and nodding your head, you lean into him slightly. “What are we going to do?”

He shrugs. “I was thinking we go to the park close to campus? Since the snow has settled and everything, we can just walk around for a couple hours until I have to go to class.”

It’s then that you register that Hyunjin called you his girlfriend. Not his fake girlfriend, just his girlfriend. You don’t do anything to correct him right now.

Instead, you look up at him, a pout gracing your lips. “But I was going to studyyyy.”

Hyunjin just shoots you a doubtful look back. “Oh, really?”

“Uh-huh!” you whine. The professor of the class you just got out of kept hinting at a pop quiz next session—considering that you failed the last pop quiz, you really didn’t want to fail a second one.

Nodding slowly, Hyunjin still looks sceptical. “Riiiight, okay.”

“I’m serious! We’re graduating soon, I can’t flunk out now!”

Hyunjin nods again. “Okaaaay, but you have…” he counts with his fingers on his free hand, “five days until then!” He stops in the middle of the walkway, stepping in front of you and taking not one, but both your hands in his. “Come onnnn, please? It’s just one day! And it snowed! It’s the perfect day to not study!”

When you respond with a blank stare, it seems like Hyunjin is forced to take drastic measures. So he tries one more very convincing line. “I’ll make you a hot chocolate when we get home! I know how much you love hot chocolate. Pleeeease?”

Something about the way his bottom lip juts out and his eyes twinkle with hope makes you want to cup his cheeks in your hands and… punch him. Yes, exactly, punch him right in the face. Hit him where it hurts.

But alas, despite your growing urge to lovingly ki…ck him off the fifth floor of the university library, you know even that won’t stop him begging you to ditch studying. So you sigh.

“Make it with milk, not water; whipped cream and chocolate syrup on top. Don’t forget the marshmallows.” That quiz will have to wait another day, but seeing the wave of happiness and relief wash over Hyunjin’s face right before he crushes you in a hug makes it worth it.

“Deal!”

…

The park is less crowded than you thought it would be. In your experience as a college student, you thought more of you would use the snow as a way to escape the stress of upcoming deadlines. Yes, you had to be bribed with hot chocolate to be here, but still. If you know, you know.

Regardless, you’re not complaining that you and Hyunjin basically have the whole park to yourselves.

“We should sit under there,” Hyunjin says, pointing to a cedar tree. Never mind the blanket of snow covering its needles that could fall on your heads.

You look up at him, your face sour. “Is that really a good idea?”

“Oh… right,” he says sheepishly, then points to a bench several feet away from it. “How about there?”

You nod and let him drag you there, ignoring the pathways and cutting through the grass. You take it as an excuse to hear the snow crunch underneath your shoes.

As you both approach the bench, Hyunjin slowly lets go of your hand to scurry ahead of you and wipe the thin layer of snow from its surface. It earns a cry from him at how cold it is, causing you to shake your head fondly.

“Why not get your gloves out?” you ask.

“I forgot I had them!” He plops down on the bench with a frown and pats the spot next to him. “Sit.”

You take a seat, pulling your backpack off your shoulders and onto your lap. Reaching in the front pocket, you blindly search for his and your gloves. When your fingers graze the soft fabric, you pull both pairs out and hand Hyunjin’s pair to him.

“Thank you,” he mumbles, hurrying to slip his gloves on his hands. Once you do the same, he holds his hand out to you.

You furrow your brow at him. “We just held hands earlier?”

Hyunjin pouts. “But my hands are cold.”

“Is that not what the gloves are for?”

“Y/N…” he pulls out the bottom lip and puppy dog eyes again. Oh no…

Your eyes guiltily flicker between his outstretched hand and his face. His stupid, pouty face that is making your heart feel things you don’t want to think about. God..

“It’s coooold,” Hyunjin whines. “And it’s a coupley thing to snuggle when it’s cold, right?”

Fake couple. But you don’t correct him out loud.

“Okay, okay,” you huff, taking his hand in yours. He smiles and entwines your fingers together.

You and Hyunjin sit in silence for a while hand-in-hand as you take in the serenity. Sounds of children giggling faintly ring from the other side of the small park, and the blanket of powdery snow in front of you is still fresh and untouched. You feel so at peace here, you don’t notice you’re scooting closer to Hyunjin.

Wait. You’re scooting closer to Hyunjin. And you’re leaning your head on his shoulder.

It’s because it’s cold. Yeah. Your bum is freezing and you could use the body heat of a fellow human. It’s like how penguins huddle for warmth in the winter, except you’re not in Antarctica; you’re in a quaint little park on a snowy day with your best friend—fake boyfriend.

And as a good fake boyfriend does, Hyunjin lets go of your hand in response and slips his arm around your shoulders. You feel his cheek gently rest on top of your head. You instinctively wrap an arm around his waist—instinctively? How did you know to do that? What are you doing?

Right, you’re snuggling. Snuggling like any ordinary couple would do. It doesn’t matter if you’re a fake couple; this is how you fake it till you make it, as they say. So you just stay like this for a few minutes. Hyunjin’s making for a great cuddler, anyway. Is he worried about not being as good as the guys in whatever movies he watches? He shouldn’t. Because he’s gentle and warm and sweet and now he’s kissing the top of your head.

Wait, what are you doing?

Your eyes fly wide open. You don’t move, but suddenly Hyunjin’s too warm and you feel suffocated in his arms. Now, all you can think of is any excuse to get up.

As if the universe was answering your prayers, a small tennis ball rolls by your feet. You look at the light green ball, then the dog leaping through the snow to chase it, then a kid you assume is its owner, far away but visibly out of breath. Letting go of Hyunjin, you bend down to grab the ball, running a few feet away before chucking the ball in the kid’s direction.

After watching the dog dash after the ball for a moment, you feel something cold splat against your back. You gasp in surprise and turn to see a frowning Hyunjin.

“You left me for a dog!” he whines childishly. He tries not to smile, but lets out a giggle at the end of his sentence.

You stare at him with your jaw dropped. “He’s cuter than you!”

He gasps loudly in offence and chucks another snowball at you.

“Who’s cuter now?!”

You scoop up some snow and toss it at his chest. “Still the dog!”

He gets up and runs straight for you. You squeak and run away, looping around the cedar tree close to the bench to try and slow him down. He quickly catches up with you, and you soon feel his arms wrap around you and pull you back. You let out a squeal at the move.

“You thought you could get away with that, huh?!” he says in between giggles. You’re just as giggly.

“Let me go!”

“Not until you say I’m cuter than that dog!”

He looks at you and you look up at him. He’s trying to pout at you, but you’re both laughing too much to take him seriously. But there’s something in his eyes, or maybe in his silly back-hug, that feels different… but you don’t want to think about that right now.

Instead, you smile and poke his cheek with one finger.

“Okay, fine. But only just a little.”

seven.

– december 1st.

Hyunjin feels himself buzzing from excitement as he guides you, hand-in-hand, through the busy streets of downtown. He would never admit it outright, but ever since you came up with the idea of fake Christmas dates, watching the switching on of the Christmas lights was high on his list. He’s dreamt of counting down the seconds until holiday lights illuminate the city, and has watched them alone. Just… not with someone. Not with someone who means as much to him as you do.

He can’t tell what’s louder: his heart thumping when your hand squeezes his as you both tuck and swerve through the busy crowd, or the crowd itself. After his realisation a few weeks prior, there’s something new and addicting about how your hand feels in his—like they were pieces of a puzzle, like they were destined to fit each other. He can’t get enough of it. He wonders if Christmas romance movie characters feel their heart beating as fast as his when he’s around you. And he wonders if it makes your heart race just as much, if there’s even a slight possibility that you look at him the same way he’s grown to look at you.

A slight tug on his hand pulls him out of his daze for just a moment. He looks back at you, who points excitedly at the giant Christmas tree in the heart of the plaza you two had just walked past. Smiling fondly, he follows you to get a closer look.

Hyunjin stops next to you, looking up at the huge, sparkling tree in front of you. He takes a moment to marvel at the bright lights strung across the expanse of the tree, the tinsel hanging from each branch, and red and gold ornaments sprinkled throughout. The tree stands at such a great height, Hyunjin can barely see the shining gold star perched atop it.

As his gaze drifts downward, across the tree again, his eyes fall on you standing by his side. In that moment, under the glittering lights bouncing off the small ornaments, Hyunjin thinks you’ve never looked prettier. You’re looking up at the tree in wonder, twinkles in your eyes as you take in the sights. You’re unaware of the way Hyunjin beholds you like you’re the most precious thing he’s ever seen. All the glowing lights surrounding you go dim in comparison every time you smile.

To Hyunjin, you’re the sun, and he’s just a star in your orbit, circling around you and living for every moment your warm light shines on him. Without you, his world would be cold and dark, just as it was before you came into his life.

Eventually, he tears his eyes away from you, focusing once again on the tree. Between the strings of bulbs, he sees flashes of a future he can picture with you: your first kiss, waking up to you in the morning every day, your wedding day and carrying you over the threshold of your home when you’re back from your honeymoon. He can see it all. Three kids, two dogs, and a hamster, family vacations, their friends being honorary uncles.

Maybe he’s getting ahead of himself, but when he’s with you, he can’t help it. You are his forever and a day.

Every time he steals a glance at you, you’re in a world of your own. You’re so focused on looking up at the pre-hanging lights that you let him drag you along without much thought. Not that he minds much, himself. The little sparkle in your eyes as you look around in awe is utterly adorable. Not to mention that you’re willingly out with him in matching Christmas sweaters—maybe reluctantly at first, but willingly nonetheless. He never thought he’d get you to agree, but now that you did, the oversized tacky sweater somehow makes you look even cuter than he imagined.

He can’t decide whether or not to scream to the world about how precious you are, or if he wants to wrap you up in a blanket and keep you all to himself. He thoroughly believes the world deserves to see your brightness, but at the same time, he only wants you to smile at him. He wants to be the reason you smile so wide your cheeks hurt, he wants to be the reason to laugh so hard you fall off your seat.

Hyunjin’s focus returns to in front of him, a small content smile playing at his lips. Not because of you (mostly), but because he already knows the perfect place to watch the switch on. He’s had this planned for weeks now—another thing he will never admit.

Ever since the announcement of the light switch on came on social media a few weeks back, Hyunjin has been on a special mission. Every weekend since then, he’s sneaked off to the city to find the best spot possible to see the lights in all their glory. (He had told you that he had been helping Changbin with some stuff; whether or not you believed him was another story). Somewhere not too crowded, somewhere not too far away. Something perfect—something you deserve.

That’s when he discovered a small cafe, its entrance hidden in a small alleyway wedged between two buildings. He was surprised at first that it was open since there were no signs on the street to indicate its existence, apart from the small menu board at the bottom of the metal staircase.

As he guides you into the alleyway, he hears you hum in confusion. Feeling your hand tense up slightly in his, he stops and turns around.

You’re looking at him with furrowed eyebrows, concern drawn all over your face. With a light squeeze of his hand, Hyunjin sends you a smile.

“Do you trust me?” he says barely above a whisper, squeezing your hand once more.

Hyunjin’s smile widens as you don’t even hesitate to nod your head at him.

“Always.”

Before you get the chance to speak, you’re already up on the roof of the small coffee shop. It’s surprisingly empty with how busy the streets are down below. It makes Hyunjin wonder why there aren’t more people up there, not that he’s complaining.

Even though you’re both out of the crowd, Hyunjin still doesn’t let go of your hand just yet. He’s too content in the way it feels right now, and he wants to soak up every moment of it, because he doesn’t know when he’ll get the chance to again. He could play the clingy card to buy himself more time—it’s something he’s done before when he was sick, and it’s worked—but it doesn’t feel quite right this time. This was different from his usual antics somehow. It feels natural, it feels right. But at the same time, he wants to jump around and do some somersaults, much like his heart in his chest is.

He quickly hides the way his smile drops when you let go of his hand and runs over to the metal railings, gasping at the better view of the hung-up lights.

When you turn back to him, it’s like everything has disappeared around him and all he can see is you and your smile. He forgets how to breathe, he feels faint, and he wants nothing more than to wrap you up in his arms and to kiss you all over your pretty face. He can’t do that, of course, but will he do it in his dreams later that night? Probably. Most definitely.

He almost misses it when you speak to him, your smile growing by the second.

“This is great Hyun!” You’re bouncing in place. “How did you find this place?”

He shrugs and looks everywhere except in your eyes to try and calm his heating cheeks.

“Oh you know, I just stumbled upon it.”

He can’t help himself when you hold your hand out to him. “Let’s watch the lights together.”

So he takes it, letting your warmth dance around his hand in a mix of comfort and giddiness. He’s sure you haven’t noticed the new effect you’ve had on him, too oblivious to the world around you to know when someone is falling head over heels for you.

There’s a part of Hyunjin’s brain that tries to remind him of the deal. A reminder that all of these events are not real, just as he wanted. However, Hyunjin decides to push these thoughts down into a little box, lock them up with a lock and key, and bury it in his mind.

The countdown is like a faint blur in his ears, the chanting taking a backseat to the person right in front of him. All he can hear is your soft counting, all he can feel is his pulse racing in his fingertips.

“Five, four, three,” Hyunjin squeezes your hand. “Two…” You squeeze it back. “One.”

At the flip of a switch, a blaze of colourful lights brighten up the town. But to Hyunjin, even they don’t compare to the awestruck sparkle in your eyes that sets his heart aflame.

eight.

– december 7th.

Since it’s the week before finals, Hyunjin insisted this past weekend that you two have dates every day this week. One, you suggested to stop the dates so you could study and he said no. That’s an understatement, actually—he practically got on his knees and begged you not to do that. Like, shook-you-by-the-shoulders, one-step-away-from-giving-up-his-americano begged.

It’s funnier now that it’s over, but you’ve never seen him more desperate for anything. Weird. Maybe he ate too many of Felix’s brownies that day.

When Hyunjin arrives at your dorm for your daily date today, the first thing he tells you is, and you quote, “Sit your ass down and wait until I finish setting up.” So, not wanting to deal with his whining today, you do exactly as you’re told for once.

You let yourself sink into your couch as your eyes lazily follow Hyunjin around. He goes in and out of your kitchen, places his laptop on the coffee table in front of you, and opens it. The screen lights up, prompting him to input his password, but instead of doing so, he heads straight back into the kitchen without a word.

Huffing silently, you lean forward and type in his password: the month and day of both of your birthdays. It takes a second, but when the screen loads into an already-opened, paused, full-screen video of a fireplace, you furrow your brows.

“Hyun? What's this?” you call out to him.

Almost instantly, you hear him groan in response. Then he appears at the kitchen door and stares at you with his arms crossed. “I told you to sit down.”

“Oops?” You smile at him sheepishly. “I’m a rule-breaker.”

Hyunjin rolls his eyes before disappearing back into the kitchen. “A freak is what you are,” he grumbles.

You gasp. “HEY! I HEARD THAT!”

“THAT’S THE POINT!” he yells back from the kitchen.

Getting up from your seat, you make your way over to the kitchen, shivering slightly from the light chill in the air. You stay at the doorway, not wanting to sacrifice your feet to the cold tiles of your kitchen floor. Your eyes land on Hyunjin’s frame faster than you’d like to admit, and he’s standing over two mugs as he places tiny marshmallows into each of them.

“I thought I said sit down,” he says, not looking in your direction. You don’t want to know how he knows you’re there; you didn’t even move from the doorway. Maybe he saw you staring, maybe he just knows you that well… you hope it’s the second one.

“I couldn’t sit still,” you huff, bringing your arms across your chest.

He picks up the two mugs, takes a few steps towards you, and gestures to them with his head.

“Take these,” Hyunjin says as he hands them over. “Go sit back down, I’ll get some blankets.”

“M’kay.” Your voice comes out higher than usual. Praying he doesn’t notice, you quickly cover it up with a cough. “I mean, yep. Mhm.”

You hold your breath as you shuffle back over to the couch, exhaling deeply as you place the two mugs on the coffee table next to Hyunjin’s laptop. It’s when you sit down that you notice the whipped cream and drizzle of chocolate syrup he added to top both of your drinks. As your gaze follows the steam lightly swirling out of the mugs, you can’t help but smile. He remembered your favourite.

Not even a minute later, he’s back, your duvet in his arms. Before you can ask why, he throws it down on top of you.

“ACK!” you shriek. “I thought—” you attempt to speak as you wrestle your way out the duvet, “you were getting blankets!”

“I got a blanket, didn’t I?”

“But why the big one?!”

You feel the couch dip as Hyunjin sits down beside you. He helps free you from the duvet before he straightens it out, waving it once and letting it drape down across your laps.

“So we can do this.”

You just keep your eyes down on the duvet for a moment. It’s more than enough to cover both your and his legs, which you guess a throw blanket wouldn’t have been able to accomplish.

When you finally look up, though, Hyunjin is smiling at you tenderly. You catch yourself holding your breath again as his soft gaze finds yours. For a second, the brown hue in his eyes reminds you of the chocolate drizzle in your hot chocolate—comforting, sweet—maybe too sweet for some, but just the right amount for you. Has the brown in his eyes always sparkled like it is now?

Wait… what are you doing?

“Oh, u-um…” You blink a few times to try to bring yourself back down to earth. “Then this works, thanks, Hyun.” You take a mug from Hyunjin when he hands one over to you. “So what exactly are we doing?”

“We’re going to cuddle and drink hot cocoa by the fireplace,” Hyunjin hums, nodding proudly before taking a long sip of his drink.

You take a second to process his words, then you glance at Hyunjin’s laptop screen. “But that’s YouTube?”

He turns to look at you and blinks. If you could reverse time, this would be the perfect time to do it.

“Well, I know that, but we don’t have a fireplace.” He sighs. “This is the best we got.”

He leans over, clicks ‘play’ on the video, and the delicate crackling of fire emanating from his laptop begins to fill the room. Maybe it’s not a real fireplace, but the heat you’re feeling from him sitting so close and the comforting sounds make you feel plenty warm.

Hyunjin settles back into his spot on the couch, picking up his mug with one hand. You lift up your mug, too, and softly clink it with his, taking a sip together as well. You’re so engrossed in the sweet, creamy drink melting in your mouth, that you don’t notice Hyunjin has casually slipped his arm around your shoulders until another few sips later. You lean your head against him and do nothing to shake his arm off, even though a tiny part of your brain screams at you to make it stop.

You’ve lost track of how much time has passed, but when the hot chocolates are finished, the crackling has faded into the background and the sound of Hyunjin’s faint snoring fills your ears. It’s enough time and space to let your brain wander. Iit wanders to the way Hyunjin’s cologne is a constant in your life, the way you always know where he is and where he’s been. It wanders to how every piece of clothing you own, and your whole life, is in some way infused with the essence of Hyunjin.

Moving your head ever-so-slightly so you don’t wake him, you let your eyes gaze at the blond-headed boy for a moment too long. You can’t understand why he tries so hard to chase after perfection, when that’s already what he is. The way his eyelashes lay across his cheeks and the way his nose scrunches up at something in his dream—you can’t help but smile at the boy who has you wrapped up in his arms.

It made you wonder when the feeling of his arms around you began to feel different. Hyunjin is Hyunjin, your best friend and nothing more than that. This fake dating thing is just that—fake. It’s a made-up relationship, a scheme to give Hyunjin what he’s always wanted: a college Christmas romance. One that started to feel a little too real to you.

There shouldn’t be feelings involved when it comes to fake dating. Everyone knows that. You can count all the romcoms you’ve ever seen on only one hand, but even you know that rule. But the way Hyunjin hugs you tighter in his sleep causes not only your heart, but your head to race as well. You’re suddenly too warm, the laptop is too loud, and you feel like the weight of the world has just fallen on your shoulders.

Your breathing begins to pick up, but you’re pulled back out of it when you feel Hyunjin move beside you. Your eyes find his half-opened ones; he looks like he could fall back asleep at any moment.

“Are you okay?” he mumbles before letting out a yawn, his arms still secure around you.

You hum, pretty much shoving your head into his chest, your eyes focused on his laptop. “I’m okay, Hyunnie.”

Luckily, the sleepy Hyunjin doesn't question it. He just pulls you closer and places a kiss on your hairline, sending your mind into another spiral.

“Just take a nap.” You feel him yawn again. “Just enjoy this time.”

When Hyunjin’s snore fills your ears once more, you let out a breath and do your best to blink away the tears swelling up in your eyes.

This was a big realisation for your brain to handle on a Tuesday night. And you're not sure what to do about it apart from what you do best—ignore it and hope it goes away.

nine.

– december 14th.

Before anyone can even say anything, Hyunjin knows he should be focusing on his art theory class. However, as he’s laying down across his desk with his head resting on his arm, he can’t help but stare at his phone in despair.

It had been seven days—one week—since the magical movie night at your dorm. Since then, all of his messages had gone unresponded—actually, you responded exactly one time: the morning after when Hyunjin had asked about getting breakfast. You were busy.

He mindlessly unlocks his phone, opening his message chain with you. Still no response or even a ‘read’ alert from you at the bottom. Deep down, he knows you haven’t even clicked on his messages if there is no ‘read’ alert, just like how his fridge won’t magically fill up with food if he doesn’t restock it… unless you turned read receipts off entirely, but that’s too much effort for you to do.

He lost count of how many times he told you in high school to turn it off when you were in fights with your friends. You’d keep opening their messages and the fights would only continue when they saw you were ignoring them. You always brushed him off saying that there was no point, that they’d still know anyway.

But here he is, staring at his phone, wishing for something, anything from you. At this point, he would take a ‘read at 3:25pm’ over the vacancy his inbox seems to taunt him with.

He only realises that class is over when the mass of people in the lecture hall scramble around him to leave. Hyunjin picks up his head from his table and sits there a moment longer.

The other students make a beeline for the door, the professor glances at Hyunjin still sitting there and shakes their head, before following the students out the semi-open door, closing it behind them. Even with everyone’s presence in the room gone, it still feels just as empty as it did twenty minutes before.

His phone lights up and a little bit of joy enters his heart, only for it to be smashed into pieces when the words become clear.

Binnie : YO !!

Binnie : free to get lunch or you with y/n?

Hyunjin responds with a simple ‘i’m free.’ He locks his phone and shoves it into his pocket before throwing his messenger bag over his shoulder, dragging himself out of the lecture hall to wherever Changbin and the gang are.

…

Hyunjin can hear them before he sees them.

Jisung’s incessant screams and Changbin’s laughter are both way too loud for Hyunjin to put up with in that moment. But still, he wonders, following the sounds as they grow closer and closer and the two clowns (said with affection) become clear.

Jisung’s too busy running around the picnic table, screaming about something with Changbin laughing so hard he has tears streaming down his face. Next to him is a silent-as-ever Chan, watching in amusement with a dopey smile present on his lips.

It goes silent when Hyunjin drops his bag with a thud on the table. It makes him wince and the stares from three of his friends makes him wish the world would swallow him whole. It’s still silent when he throws one leg over the bench and sits himself down, bringing the other leg in before using his bag as a pillow.

Three, two, one… he thinks.

“What’s up with you?”

There it is. Hyunjin ignores the question as he tries to push his head further into his bag.

“Hyun?” Chan’s voice is softer than the other two boys. Whilst he knows the other two mean well, it’s a lot more comforting when it’s coming from Chan. “Are you okay?”

It takes all of his strength to pick his head up off of the table and look at the eldest of the four boys. Hyunjin feels as if his default look is to frown and when the other two boys clock on, Jisung is sat down next to him in a flash.

“Bro,” Changbin starts. “You look as if your mum told you you’d never see Kkami again.”

This clown (again said with affection) really did not have the slightest indication of how to comfort someone. There was something unique about Changbin, he had heart, but brains? That and reading the room wasn’t always his strong suit.

“I think what he means is,” Chan rephrases, “you look really down in the dumps. What’s up, buddy?” There he goes, talking as if he’s seventy when he’s barely twenty-six.

“Y/N hasn’t spoken to me in a week…” Hyunjin mumbles, letting his head fall back onto his bag. “Do you think she hates me?” he asks, but to the trio it comes out more like, ‘o u inks smates me?’

He isn’t sure who places a hand on his back—he assumes it’s Jisung with the angle. All he knows is he can feel a cold hand just barely pressing through his hoodie.

“Maybe she’s busy?” Jisung says, patting Hyunjin’s back lightly. “She’ll send her usual emoji update when she’s ready.”

Hyunjin only picks up his head again so his friends can hear him. “She hasn’t even read any of my messages.”

It’s quiet, too quiet. When he sits up to look at them and Jisung’s hand falls from his back, Hyunjin’s frown just enhances. The boys look at each other, frowns present on their own faces. Hyunjin doesn’t think they completely understand the situation. But then again, neither can he.

“What do I do?” he says.

“She’s probably busy with exams…” Jisung blurts out, looking at the two boys sitting across from them before looking back at Hyunjin.

“Yeah!” Changbin pipes in. “Plus her internship! That’s probably keeping her busy too, especially since it’s close to Christmas!”

Hyunjin looks over at Chan, he’s silent like usual. He has a sad smile on his face, like he wants to say something to calm Hyunjin’s worries, but he’s just not exactly sure what those words are.

“Thanks guys…” Hyunjin does his best to smile.

Jisung brings him in for a tight hug. Even though he normally would have, Hyunjin doesn’t try to push him away. The coos from the two other boys make his heart feel just a bit warmer.

…

– december 15th.

Hyunjin should have called first. But with how silent you’ve been over the past eight days, he knew you wouldn’t have picked up. So here he stands, two pizza boxes in one hand as he tries to pluck up the courage to finally knock on your door after standing outside it for god knows how long.

He wonders if you’ll smell the pizza from inside and open the door yourself so he wouldn’t have to knock. A boy can dream.

He clenches his fist so hard it turns white. Takes a deep breath, releases it. Takes another one. He thinks about how he’ll knock on the count of three—but then procrastinates even more by thinking about if he means he’d do it on three or after three.

In actuality, he doesn’t need to do anything when the sound of your door unlocking makes him smile slightly. He knew you’d smell the pizza.

When the door opens up wide enough, you jump back slightly in surprise. Hyunjin can barely believe himself either. He’s actually here… in all his anxious glory.

“Hyunjin…”

Your face visibly pales, causing Hyunjin to frown. Did you really not want to see him that badly? Over a week of nothing and this is how you react when you see him again?

He looks down at your outfit. You’ve got your puffer coat on and your bag draped across your chest, sending the puffiness out in awkward directions. “Where are you going?”

“I– I’ve got class,” you stutter.

“Oh.” Hyunjin’s shoulders drop.

He motions to the pizza boxes in his hand and smiles sheepishly. He watches how your eyes glance at them before darting off in another direction.

“I thought we could chill and have pizza, like normal,” he explains, shrugging his shoulders. “I’m sorry, I forgot you had class today and…” Hyunjin pauses. He takes another deep breath as he watches you, waiting to see if you’d finally look at him. “I was just wondering if we could talk… it’s been a while you know?”

One of your hands comes up to fiddle with the hair behind your left ear. Hyunjin takes note of how you bite at your bottom lip.

“Yeah, I’m sorry about that.”

Hyunjin blinks. You’re still avoiding his gaze.

“Can we at least talk quickly?” he asks. He can’t tell if he’s grateful or not when you open the door wider for him to enter.

“Okay. Just make it quick.”

He shuffles inside, placing the pizza boxes down on the coffee table that once held his laptop as their makeshift fireplace. Turning back to you, Hyunjin now sees how your hands are shoved into your pockets. Your coat is zipped all the way up so you can hide your face in your collar.

“Where have you been?” The question escapes his lips before he can even register it.

He’s watching you for every single change in your body language, every little muscle movement. Anything that will clue him into what the heck is happening.

“I’m sorry,” you say, barely above a whisper. “I’ve been busy with schoolwork, and my internship is piling more on me because Christmas is coming up.” Just like Changbin had thought. But even then, it didn’t feel enough.

“You could have said something,” Hyunjin sighs. “Anything. Even just an emoji like you usually do when you’re cramming.”

He’s surprised when you have nothing to say. You’re just hiding in your coat collar and he can see the distressed look on your face. Hyunjin has never felt more confused in his life, and here you are, doing nothing to help. He feels as if he’s questioning every life choice he’s made up to this point.

“Are you okay?” he speaks again after another moment. “You know you can tell me anything, right?”

Hyunjin feels like tiny needles are being pricked into his heart, and your silence is pushing them deeper. The more seconds that tick by, the more his heart crumbles in his chest.

He watches as you take a deep breath in. He watches you as you exhale.

“About that…” You gulp and take another breath. “We should stop this… we should break up.”

Hyunjin can hear the glass house around him break into hundreds and thousands of little pieces. He’s sure that in all that rubble is his heart—pierced and splinted, bleeding out from each wound. Yet all that he can do is blink.

“...What?”

For the first time in his life, he cannot read a single expression or feeling on your face. It’s like he’s been placed in the middle of the desert; no map, no compass, nothing. He’s lost, afraid, and so, so alone. And you’re just standing there, a mere few feet away from him, unable to even look him in the eye.

“We should end our agreement.” You’re fiddling with the strap on your bag as if to keep your mind from spiralling or wondering. “Look, everything with class and my internship is getting busier, and you wanted Christmas dates, right?”

You gulp again. Hyunjin is just silent. He can’t even nod.

“You got what you wanted. You got the dates and to experience a Christmas romance.” You finally look him in the eye, and it’s like one final stab to his heart. “So we should end this now, so we can both focus on the things we need to.”

You’re finally staring at each other, battling it out silently for who can keep their hold the longest. It’s torture and Hyunjin’s never felt pain like this… it pierces into his stomach so bad that he wants to throw up.

“Hyunjin—”

Before you can even finish your sentence, you’re cut off by the sound of the door unlocking. Your eyes widen in surprise as Yeri, your usually missing roommate, walks through the door. She has a suitcase behind her, probably back from whatever adventure she’s been on with her girlfriend.

You seem glad to see her back in one piece, but god, did she have the worst timing. It makes Hyunjin want to scream. Why now, of all times, did she have to decide to come home? Right when Hyunjin’s in the middle of being ‘dumped’ by the person he’s in love with?

Yeri looks up in shock, takes one of her airpods out of her ear, and grins sheepishly.

“Oh, I’m sorry…” Her eyes flicker between you and Hyunjin. She’s not sure what to make of the awkward atmosphere, but Hyunjin doesn’t blame her. “I’ll…” She motions to her bedroom door to insinuate the end of her sentence, before dragging her suitcase behind her.

When the soft click of her door closing behind her is heard, you turn your attention back to Hyunjin. You open your mouth to speak, but before you can utter a word, he shakes his head.

“No.” He doesn’t even let you begin.

He wants to scream and cry out, not only in confusion, but in what Hyunjin can’t tell is anger or just pure sadness. He doesn’t, partly because he knows Yeri is within earshot, but also because he doesn’t know if he has the energy. His mind is making so many laps and leaps trying to figure out everything that he just wants to lie down.

He gasps for air. His eyes feel misty and he wants to do nothing but run.

“I get it,” he mutters, looking away. “You can have what you want.”

Hyunjin says no more, leaving the discarded pizzas on the coffee table. He ignores the way his heart stings when you don’t call after him. He doesn’t even bother to wait for the elevator, choosing to rush down the stairs to get out of the building as fast as possible whilst wiping his cheeks haphazardly with the back of his sleeve.

He once again wants the world to swallow him whole—or for him to sleep for the rest of the Christmas season. Because, honestly, none of it seems worth it anymore.

ten.

– december 18th.

How is it possible that three days can feel like an eternity?

‘We should end this.’ Your voice repeats in Hyunjin’s brain in a constant loop. It torments him when he’s awake and stays to haunt him in his dreams. ‘We should break up.’

The first day felt like torture. All he wanted to was rant about you, to you. Sure, he could go to his other friends, but when you’re his first choice… what could he do? He couldn’t call or text you now that he wants to more than over. He wanted to cry at the sound of your voice and beg you to reconsider—to go on real dates with him—to have a real Christmas romance.

‘You got what you wanted.’

Day two was just as hard. When he hadn’t blown up the group chat over some random thing in over twenty-four hours, this was when his friends got worried. So they blew up his phone instead with a mixture of concern and heartfelt care, and whatever you call Jisung’s messages. Hyunjin decided to ignore them, but kept checking his phone on the off-chance he’d get a text from you. Eventually, he turned over his phone and rolled over in his bed, shutting his eyes and hoping the world would disappear for a bit.

‘You got the dates, you got to experience a Christmas romance.’

Now here he sits, on day three, in the trio’s shared off-campus apartment. He only begrudgingly got out of bed when Jisung threatened to start screaming outside his door. He’s lying sideways across the couch, his feet propped up against the armchair. He hasn’t washed his hair in too long, he vaguely thinks a family of birds might nest in it someday, and his grey sweats have a big blotch of brown on one leg. He spilled hot Americano on himself when he got home after your breakup, but he didn’t have the energy to change out of them.

He knows he shouldn’t be calling it a breakup when you two were never really together. But when his feelings are completely and utterly real, it really feels like one. He feels his eyes start to become misty again, and he shoves his head into his sweater paws as he tries to bury himself in the sofa more.

‘So we should end this now.’

Chan, Changbin, and Jisung are all watching from the barely-used dining table. They are at a loss for words, they hadn’t thought about the possibility of you and Hyunjin ever breaking up. To everyone in the friend group, you two were set for life, ride-or-dies, the sunshine to the flowers. To them, there was never any possibility of a break up. They just didn’t get it.

Changbin takes a sip of his protein shake through a bright pink curly straw, and huffs. “This is weird, dudes.” He looks over at the two other boys, who still have their eyes on Hyunjin. “He’s never been like this with anyone.”

“Y/N isn’t just anyone, though,” Chan responds.

“Yeah,” Jisung sighs, resting his chin on the palm of his hand. His eyes still bore into Hyunjin. “They’re, like, totally made for each other.”

Hyunjin brings his hands away slightly, sending the best glare he could manage. To the boys, however, it was more pitiful than scary, like a kicked puppy. All they want to do is scoop him up and never let him go until his heart is unbroken.

“You know I can hear you, right?” Hyunjin asks. “And to be honest, I really don’t like all this mumbling.”

The boys don’t hold his bad mood against him. He’s upset, frustrated, and they know he’ll apologise when he’s feeling better. Chan takes the lead, opening his mouth to speak before the other two dummies could say anything to make Hyunjin more upset.

“We’re sorry, we’re just confused on why you guys broke up,” he explains. The other two boys nod their heads as the eldest speaks. “You two have always seemed so perfect for each other.”

They notice how Hyunjin’s shoulders drop and he goes to hide his face in his sweater paws again. His words come out all muffled and Chan, Changbin, and Jisung all glance at each other to see if any of them understood what he said.

“What was that?” Chan asks. Hyunjin yanks his sweater paws away from his face, turning his head sharply at the boys.

“We never broke up, okay?!”

The trio can now really see how glassy Hyunjin’s eyes have become. They exchange concerned glances with each other, frowns of their own also covering their faces.

“W-Wait. What do you m—”

Hyunjin cuts Chan off with a hiccup.

“We— we were never really together... So w-we never really broke up.”

The boys are stunned, confused and so completely stunned. They don’t know where to even begin to wrap their heads around the confession. But it also leads them to the next question, if it was all fake… why was Hyunjin so distraught now that it was over?

Now it didn’t take a genius to figure that out, but it was better to hear it from Hyunjin himself.

“Okay,” Chan gulps, “do you want to start from the beginning?”

So Hyunjin starts from the beginning. He starts off with the confession from Jisoo that was totally not the vibe. He talks about how he went to you to whine about how he was losing his chance for a college christmas romance, to how you suggested he should fake date someone to get the experiences he wanted. To how he had decided you were his perfect person for the task.

“Why didn’t you just tell us it was fake, man?” Changbin asks, “it wouldn’t have been that much of a deal.”

Hyunjin sighs, falling back into the chair and letting his head fall backwards so he can look up at the ceiling.

“I don’t know, just wanted it to seem more realistic I guess.” He sighs.

“Well…” Jisung continues, “what happened next?”

So Hyunjin continues with his story. He talks about the decorating of your dorm, he ignores the comment from Jisung about that’s how your apartment got that way. He goes on to talk about the movie night and the cookies to the ice skating, and he talks about the Christmas tree farm.

“From there…” Hyunjin slows down and pauses.

The trio is silent, waiting for the blond to admit what they all know. They’re not sure how long he’s silent for, it could have been only a second, but in that moment it could have also been a lifetime.

“From there… It was different.”

He looks over to the three boys at the dining table. He felt like his heart was cracking in a whole new different way. When he was keeping it to himself, he could shove it into a little box and act as if it was something future-Hyunjin had to deal with. But now this present version of him hated past him for even thinking about putting the emotions aside to begin with.

“I don’t know when it happened, or if it happened long before I even realised it, but she’s different. She’s her version of perfect and now it’s blown up in my face.” Hyunjin’s frown is contagious. “I– I love her and now she wants nothing to do with me anymore.”

“I’m sure that’s not true…” Changbin tries to sympathise, but Hyunjin just shakes his head.

“You should have seen her, she would barely look at me.” Hyunjin begins to hiccup again. “She’s the love of my life and it ended before it even started.”

Jisung opens his mouth to speak, but Chan quickly nudges him in the side to be quiet. When Jisung looks at the older boy, all Chan does is shake his head. A look on his face saying let him get this out.

“Ever since the Christmas tree farm, she’s been different, she’s amazing and kind–” Hyunjin hiccups, blinking away the tears he could feel welling up in his eyes. “She has this sparkle about her and even though I know it annoyed her, she still let me go on and on about how I wanted a perfect college Christmas romance when with her… I don’t need perfection.”

“What are you going to do?”

Hyunjin feels like curling up into a ball. He wishes for his friends to stop staring at him. He wants to hide, he wants to cry, and he wants to eat his body weight in a food that isn’t going to remind him of you– not that there were many types of those things.

“I need to give her the space she wanted,” Hyunjin states. “She can do the things she needs to: focus on work and her internship. And I'll wait…”

“Wait for her?” Jisung says.

Hyunjin nods. “I’ll wait forever if I have to.”

eleven.

– december 14th.

When the soft click of her door closing behind her is heard, you turn your attention back to him. You open your mouth to speak, but before you can utter a word, he shakes his head.

“No.” He doesn’t even let you begin.

He gasps for air and you can see him blinking rapidly. You feel your heart tear in two.

“I get it,” he mutters. “You can have what you want.”

Before you can utter another word, he’s out the door. You’re sure the pizza he leaves behind is cold by now, but even if you were hungry a few minutes ago, you’re not anymore. What you want more is for him to turn around, to come back when you call out to him.

But he’s gone. It’s too late.

“Okay, so what was that all about?” Yeri’s voice breaks you out of your trance.

You’re not sure how long it’s been since Hyunjin left your dorm, your door is still wide open, and you haven’t even moved a muscle. Even though you have class in twenty minutes—that part you didn’t lie about—you want nothing but to run into your room and hide there for the rest of the year.

You clear your throat and your hands go back to the strap of your bag to keep them entertained. “I… I don’t know what you’re on about.”

You haven’t even turned to look at her and you know that she knows you’re lying through your teeth.

“Uh huh,” Yeri tuts.

You hear her footsteps get closer to you before she’s come up beside you and is now in eye view.

“So no trouble going on with Mr Blond Best Friend, then?” she continues to question.

You stay silent in response, not trusting your own voice. Your eyes start to feel wet. You were able to keep up an act in front of Hyunjin, but now that he’s gone and the vision of his teary eyes keeps repeating in your mind, it’s getting more and more difficult to pretend.

“Nothing’s going on,” you clear your throat again. Tugging on your crossbody bag, you look at her once before rushing to the door. “I need to go to class, glad to see you back.”

Yeri can’t even get another word out as you rush out the door, slamming it behind you. You unknowingly take the same route as Hyunjin, rushing down the stairs to get out of the building as quickly as possible.

Once the cold air hits you, you take a deep breath and wipe your cheeks with the back of your hands.

You had to, it was the only option.

“Hyunjin!” you call out, looking all around you. Several students push by you, some wearing holiday pyjamas or Santa hats. You don’t understand how they can feel even an ounce of Christmas spirit right now.

You try running somewhere, anywhere, ducking and weaving through the pack of students making their way to wherever they want to go. There are hundreds of students out, yet you can pick out one blond head from the crowd.

“Hyunjin!”

You run faster. Before you’re able to process it, someone on an electric scooter whizzes by, knocking you off your feet. You yelp and stretch your arms out to catch yourself.

And now you’re on the ground. Groaning, you slowly move to get up. Hundreds of students pass by where you lie, but not one stops to help you. Until…

“Oh my god, Y/N!”

You light up for a second at the familiar voice. Once you realise who it is, you roll over, deflated.

Jisung gasps. “You look like death! What happened to you?!”

You blink once. “Gee, thanks,” you say flatly.

The boy stares at you for a second before finally reaching a hand out. You take it and he pulls you up.

“O-Okay, but seriously, what happened?” he says. “Are you okay?”

You search his eyes for a moment before shrugging. What are you supposed to say to Jisung? That you just ruined your friendship with the love of your life?

“It’s about Hyunjin, isn’t it?” Jisung says, his voice softer. The way he’s watching you makes you tear up all over again. He seems to let you process for another moment before reaching over, rubbing your shoulder gently.

“Look,” he sighs, “I… I know you two weren’t real. I honestly thought you were, though.” He then mutters something along the lines of, “So I didn’t owe our friend group sixty dollars after all.”

“That’s your first thought right now?”

“Wait, nonono!” Jisung’s stance changes in a snap and begins frantically smoothing out your outfit, ruffling your messy hair and making it even messier. “It’s okay, it’s okay, everything will beeee okaaayyy.”

You groan and roll your eyes fondly, but you let him continue.

“Okay, but for real now…” He rubs your shoulder again. “I think you should tell him.”

A breath hitches in the back of your throat. “Tell him… what exactly?”

He sighs deeply. “You know what I mean, Y/N.”

It’s your turn to sigh, and you look down at your shoes as your eyes well up again. Jisung smiles sadly at you and pulls you into a hug.

“He misses you, you know that?” he says. You nod, shoving your face in his shoulder before he can see you cry. “And don’t worry, I won’t tell him you miss him, too. That’s your job.”

In between sobs, you nod.

“And once you two get together, I can get my damn money back,” Jisung grumbles.

You let out a wet chuckle and hold onto him for another minute. You’re terrified of what may happen, but no amount of fear in your body is worth the heartbreak you feel right now.

twelve.

– december 24th.

Hyunjin feels… something.

Every year on Christmas Eve, the boy would scramble to get to bed early, so he could be asleep by the time Santa comes. Obviously, though, he’s since outgrown that tradition, but now he stays up till midnight like every other teenager and college student, counting down the seconds to Christmas Day. It’s as if Christmas is Hyunjin’s pre-New Year of sorts. He may not believe in Santa anymore, but the childlike wonder and excitement he gets during this time of year has never changed. He’s all jumpy and hyper and jittery like a kid who ate too much candy, eagerly awaiting the day that the movies and the lights and the snow have made so magical.

And this year, for the first time ever, he might not be counting down alone.

Going the past week without hearing the sound of your voice felt like walking barefoot through a pit full of Legos—doubly so because he saw you on campus during finals week talking to Jisung once. Jisung! Out of everyone in your friend circle, of course you were still talking to the one who flirts with everyone for fun. At least he didn’t wink at you this time…

But after what felt like aeons of being sent to voicemail, you finally called him back six days, sixteen hours, and forty-seven minutes ago. You said something about meeting up for lunch the day after or something; he barely remembers anything from that call other than that you called. That lunch at the university cafe wasn’t much different. He was so relieved that you were in front of him talking to him again that he wasn’t paying much attention to what you were actually saying.

…Okay, maybe that’s a lie. You rearranged the Christmas decorations he had thrown all over your dorm on your first date, you got all your Christmas shopping done, and you have a super-duper special date planned for Christmas Eve. Dress warm. You’ll pick him up at 8 for dinner. And you’ll both be getting home late.

Hyunjin can see his breath just past his nose as he checks out his reflection in the glass window panes of the university library. He picked out his best winter coat for tonight—the one that goes with almost any outfit he could put together, but also doesn’t take the limelight off of yours. He also broke out the pristine white sneakers—you know, the ones he cleans frantically after every use. Were they going to get dirty in the snow? Maybe a little. But it’s you, and they go so well with his sweater and jeans. You deserve his best fit.

He knows nothing about what your plan is for tonight. All he knows is that you’ll be here in five minutes, his stomach is doing flips inside him, and he’s got shivers going up his spine.

Hyunjin feels something—he just can’t name what that something is. All the adjectives he can think of don’t feel quite right. The closest he can get is ‘tingly’, and even then, he can’t explain why he landed on that particular word. But when you pull up at the library and roll down your window, all the words he’s ever learned fly out the door.

No combination of letters could capture how beautiful you are to him.

…

Hyunjin is surprised to find himself back in the heart of downtown. This time, it’s after a lovely meal and hours-long conversation with you, and you’re the one guiding him around now.

He swivels his head around as he lets you lead, taking in all the glittery Christmas lights the same way you are. Quickly, he recognizes you’re taking the same path he once did to the cafe where you two watched the light switch. He feels like he’s on the Polar Express to the North Pole—yes, of course he was watching the movie before your date tonight. It’s a Christmas must.

Wait… fake date. He nearly forgot these dates aren’t real.

He’s not sure why he let himself get away with calling all these real dates. Clearly, it made you uncomfortable to the point where you felt the need to fake-break up with him. He’s also not sure if he should consider himself lucky that the breakup wasn’t real.

Does this mean the fake Christmas romance thing is back on? You two never actually discussed it, but you did also ask him on a… fake date.

Despite this, there’s still something in the air that’s giving him that tingly feeling. He’s still not sure if that’s the right word. He just knows that standing right next to you on the balcony of an abandoned cafe to witness the arrival of Christmas Day… it feels so, so right. Almost like everything is falling into place.

“Hyunnie… can we talk?”

—

Hyunjin turns to you, his gaze soft, and you freeze in place. Did you really just say that? Now? What if you ruin Christmas Eve and Christmas because you didn’t wait?

You sigh to yourself, a small puff of air escaping your mouth. You know that this was something you needed to do, both for yourself and your peace of mind. Maybe Jisung, too, and whatever lost money he was moping about that one time. But there’s still ten minutes to midnight. Is that too soon?

No. It’s not. If anything, it’s long overdue. No more running. Plus, if he’s truly your best friend and he doesn’t like you back, nothing should change… right? At least, not for the long term.

“Is everything okay?”

Hyunjin’s honey voice pulls you out of your thoughts. Hyunnie, sweet like honey… wait, Y/N, don’t get distracted. It’s almost midnight.

Take a deep breath.

“Hyunnie, um…” You fiddle with a small object in your pocket as you try to think.

When you look up, he’s nodding. “Yeah?”

Deep breath.

“I’m sorry… I'm sorry for ghosting you and stopping this so suddenly.” You’re blinking and Hyunjin watches as you open your mouth to speak before closing it again. Like the words are at the tip of your tongue, but the courage just hasn’t bubbled up enough. “I…” You take a breath, looking up at anywhere but him as you mumble to yourself, “God, this is so much harder than I thought it’d be.”

You take a little shuffle forward.

“I… I think I realised too late, and by the time I realised, I freaked out and just… I shut down.” You look at him, your eyes boring into each other like you’re both trying to find the centre of each other’s soul. It's too much for you to stomach while you struggle to pull words out of your throat, so you let your gaze fall.

“Realised what?” Hyunjin whispers. You somehow hear it over the crowd of people forming below you.

You shuffle forward unconsciously again, keeping your eyes down.

“Do— do you hate me?” Hyunjin says.

Eyes wide, you snap your head up and shake your head quickly. “N-No! Of course not.” “Then what—”

Your gaze shoots down and your hand goes for Hyunjin’s. A small gasp leaves his mouth before your brain catches up with the rest of you.

When you finally have the courage to look back up, it’s like everything has blurred into the background. Everything except the boy in front of you, who looks about as shocked as you are at yourself. Is this it? Is this going to be your Hallmark moment?

Deep breath.

“I love you.”

Hyunjin’s eyes grow wider, his mouth opening and closing like a fish a couple times. He probably thinks someone took over your body, that this isn’t really you.

“You… love me?”

You nod and smile. It’s hard to tell if he’s still in disbelief, but honestly, you can barely believe you’re saying these words. But you mean every single one of them.

“I do… and there’s no one else I’d rather have a Christmas romance with.”

There’s a feverish look grazing Hyunjin’s face, his mouth opened just slightly as he gasps quietly. You swear you can see little stars adorning his pretty brown eyes.

“Well,” you clarify quickly, “a college Christmas romance. But I don’t think I want this to end after we graduate.”

Hyunjin’s eyes are crinkling at the edges, his nose scrunching just slightly with the force of his joy. You’re sure of two things in that moment. One, your own expression must look just as lovesick as his. And two, you’ve never seen anyone as beautiful as Hyunjin under the glow of the lights surrounding the plaza.

“Y/N, I… can I kiss you?”

From somewhere in the streets below, you recognize the gathered crowd beginning the countdown to midnight. You barely pay it half a mind as you pull the object from your pocket. Hyunjin’s eyes follow you as you hold it up over your heads. It’s a small sprig of mistletoe, and you can’t help the proud smile that sweeps across your face.

“You know, you wanted to hit all the Christmas traditions and you forgot one of the best ones.”

“God, I love you.”

You practically jump into his arms when he presses his lips against yours. Fireworks explode in your chest as the clock rings twelve and cheers erupt from the streets below. It’s all a buzz in your head, though, as you cup Hyunjin’s cheeks in your hands and melt into his arms and lips and just him.

You hope he never tries to chase perfection again, because you’re sure that this moment, right now, is the definition of it. Nothing has ever felt so perfect, so right, and nothing else will ever come close.

As if on cue, when you two slowly break the kiss, you feel something wet land on your head. You and your not fake boyfriend?—you’ll have to talk to him about that later—look up to see fluffy, white snowdrops falling all around you two.

“Merry Christmas, Hyunnie,” you say, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

Hyunjin has the biggest smile on his face as you pull away. “Merry Christmas, Y/N.”

You let out a joyful giggle. It looks like Hyunjin got the cheesy Christmas romance he’s been searching his whole life for. It might not have gone the exact way he’d dreamed of, but you hope he is as happy as he has always made you.

And maybe, just maybe, you also got the ending you’d been dreaming of all along.

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