#i am..not good today

[icouldhyperfixatehim]

constructive criticism for god: costochondritis imitating the symptoms and pain level of a heart attack? really man?

#i am..not good today #breathing is hard when you feel like you're being crushed #and crying will make everything worse so 🙃 #just a little reminder to my mutuals and followers that my little haha jokes are all sponsored by Big Disability #🥄 blogging #ag seafóid

[theoldaeroplane]

worried that thing you put in your art or writing or game or music is too self-indulgent, too self-referential, too niche for anyone but yourself? fear not! you can do whatever you want forever. and you should.

#writing #art #music #games #things i have to remind myself of daily #anyway ive found those things you're worried about sharing are often the most powerful things you CAN share #i hope you write #<- i would like to replace that tag with something that is less conversational #it makes reblogs awkward #anyway good morning. i have so many things to do today but instead i am crafting a memorial to my partner's best friend in my fanfiction.

[obsob]

to be loved is to be held!!! print

#mine #cats #i made into. a5 print!! #i will still stock th larger one for now....i lov a5 tho its so nice. so compact #i had a good day today! went into the city and got notebooks and sticker and a poetry book i am going to hvae to read very very slowly #i can beat dyslexia . i can win #it is very cold also. perhaps will hve a bath tomorrow! and do some drawing :3 #i hope everyone has a nice evening #if u are wondering how cat is doing he is settling in good ! he keeps clawing at the furniture but hey. thats a cat

[giantkillerjack]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[theclaravoyant]

Thinking about how Crowley thinks Aziraphale calls him when he’s bored (when nothing is happening) , when he’s “done something clever” (when something good happens), or when he needs help (when something bad happens) . Like. Crowley my beloved that’s all the times.

#he is in loooove with you #crowley x arizaphale #ineffable spouses #ineffable husbands #good omens #Aziraphale could be like “”’hey I saw a cool duck today #and thought of you #and when Crowley’s in That Mood he’d be like oh so you’re bored then #i knowwww it’s easier said than done Crowley #I am begging you to surrender to the mortifying ideal of being liked

[creatinghelen]

please please please when something good happens, let yourself feel good! be proud of yourself, revel in that joy, bask in the happiness. you deserve it! you deserve to feel good!!

#hj #you deserve to feel so good!! #today I am very happy and proud of myself <3

[raggedy-spaceman]

S02E04 The Hitchhiker

This is insane, they are insane for this. I want to scream.

#good omens #good omens 2 #good omens spoilers #gos2 spoilers #ineffable husbands #aziracrow #aziraphale #crowley #michael sheen #david tennant #1941 #good omens 2 spoilers #go2 spoilers #i just rewatched this today with my family and i almost exploded #this is not ok #i am SO unwell #mine

[buggachat]

hey guys, i know you all want updates to my bakery enemies comic! i AM still going to finish it, i have NOT given up on it, and i'm sorry this hiatus has been so much longer than i anticipated. getting the second wind i need to work on it can be kind of tough (especially since we're in the final stretch, so when i start working on it again i want to make it all the way to the FINISH), but it is still absolutely in development!

anyway, this is also to say, you don't need to tell me you want updates. I know you do, and I can't give a clear answer as to when the next update will be, because i'm not sure when that inspiration will strike... but... if you're going to ask for updates, please don't do it on my other works. It's kind of disheartening to have comments on a new, unrelated work say "but what about beau?". If you want to ask about beau, at least ask it on a beau-related post, please!

#bakery enemies au #putting this out in anticipation because im going to be posting some art today #i am drawing again for the first time in a while so that's a good sign #or well. i HAVE been drawing since but... not for fun lol #the paris special has awakened something in me

[floccinaucinihilipilificationa]

#sherlock #it might be the cough medicine but I'm really feeling the bbc sherlock wedding episode today #a good feeling ₍՞◌′ᵕ‵ू◌₎♡ #like finding an old block of cheese in the back of the fridge you forgot about and its gotten super hard and chewy #i currently have half a block of gouda curating in the vegetable cupboard #waiting #how are you doing friends!! C: #I'm good! I still have the cough but I also got a new scarf #I'm still thinking about buying window colors as well but I am waiting if that is also just because of the cough medicine #I can't believe it's already been a year since I have moved! last year I was doing everything here for the first time #and now everything is happening for a second time! that year was both very long and also happened very fast #our floor in the “office” my father wanted to install still is not completly done but he threw up last time he tried #he did not threw up because of the floor but because every time he does a home renovation project he drinks 3 liters of Cherry Coca Cola #we are trying to not make him drink 3 liters of Cherry Coca Cola but he doesn't want anyone else to finish the floor I think so we just do #not mention the hole in the floor #have a nice autumn day friends!! I hope you're doing well! ( ´͈ ◡ `͈ ) #♥

[starstruckodysseys]

honestly after escape the green room i don’t blame her

#apparently i am siobhan posting today. good #dimension 20 #d20 #mentopolis #mentopolis spoilers #siobhan thompson #game changer #escape the green room #reese watches mentopolis

[dizzybizz]

"this is regrettably the best kiss of your life, you understand?"

#that “you understand?” kills me everytime... #i love how high condis voice got during this bit its so fkn funny DHASHGFSFGHASFhg #hi yes have the inevitable ep21 crit kiss piece except i watched ep53 today and am so 😀 im so 😀 damn i m so 😀 #i love eps where they just go through so many different gimmick rooms its so fun its so fun when its not so painful 😀 #happy valentines too ig #just roll with it #jrwi riptide #gillion tidestrider #jrwi chip #jay ferin #jrwi fish and chips #my art #i had a bit of a meltdown over gill through uhm... 1-3am today and i just hm #sorry to everyone in the mayors QAC uhm im not really sorry but like sorry if you could hear every msg ping uhm yeah #it was like hours of me sobbing to myself in the interests channel and it was really good for my mental health ngl like its really therapeu #-tic to just scream abt a blorbo all night #and i ended up dreaming abt infodumping to one of my brothers friends of all ppl n i got so intense abt how much i love marshall john n my #brother came into the room and dragged his friend out 😭😭😭 i just wanted to ramble abt the himbo pls..... #my walls of tags are so consistent... only consistent thing abt this fkn blog smh.

[obikinetic]

Star Wars: The Sub Awakens

Aka, Anakin has a very ill-timed ~realization~

This is my contribution for Sub Anakin Fest [@anakinfest], which I actually didn’t sign up for but decided to butt in on anyway! As such, this doesn’t correspond to any prompts :)

#subanakinfest #star wars #obikin #anakin skywalker #obi wan kenobi #sw fanart #fanart #art #please please tell me if I went about this the wrong way because I have no idea what I’m doing #it’s a very good thing the deadline kept being pushed back because I literally just finished this today 💀 #I am HORRIBLE #anyway I’m glad I got it done because I really wanted to participate #ik this is barely subby but it was fun to me at least!

[obsob]

oaugh kitties

#mine #original #my sketchbooks r full of odd cats and bad figure drawing #as life should b #i had an entire breakdown yesterday but now i feel fine !! #bought sm snacks today....am going to practice knitting #i am . not good. but i am having fun

[yubriamakesart]

Shortly after uploading this I saw a post where someone mentioned how Mr. Qi is canonically a creepypasta character now. And like. Surely. If you've read my webcomic. You know I can't resist that.

#sdv fanart #mr qi #mr qi sdv #stardew valley #flash warning #i guess? just to be safe #i am SO rusty at animating in csp this took ages to do #maybe its just that i never really learned animating programs but it feels very unintuitive #that being said this was a lot of fun #i have such a soft spot for video game creepypastas #love them when they're good and love them when they're bad #fanart #maybe now i can actually play stardew today

[sava-smth-draws]

Find out what she's listening to under the cut ↓

#artists on tumblr #ultrakill #ultrakill art #mirage ultrakill #dect #at least adjacent... #mv2 implied... #id in alt #i finished it at 4 am good thing tomorrow (today) is saturday #and I'm queuing it so it goes off once my post limit is down... #hard to be such a reblogger

[dangoulains-devotion]

#FF7 #FF7R #FF7 Rebirth #Final Fantasy VII #Final Fantasy VII Rebirth #aerith gainsborough #barret wallace #my favourite synergy ability... solely for the animation its so cute and cool #sorry papa wallace for i am 1) not good at drawing facial hair and 2) was not mentally strong enough to draw your gun #one day i will but today was not that day #i worked on this for 9 hours straight it got to a point i zoomed out and was like why doesnt this look right #and it was bc i forgot his tattoo....... he's naked iwthout that #also i've never tried to do comic-y explosions and text before so i kind of just looked at clip art for reference and then yolo'd it #i hope it doesnt look terrible i've decided i no longer care to fret over it #i need you to understand that if you were to zoom out the camera on this photo #barret is proper crouched down and aerith is standing on a pile of books #so that they could attain a pose where she is leaning on his shoulder #I FORGOT MY OWN ART TAG bro im so tired #my art #<- i am moonlight elegy on twt