#he told me that the only thing that matters in life is the impact we have on other people

[cozage]

New Multi-Chapter Fic: The Moss that Grew in Gloom

A/N: A multi-chapter fic I promised weeks ago is finally starting!! With Made for Two being complete, I finally can redirect some of my efforts to other things, and this is at the top of my list! I hope you enjoy!!

Characters: female reader x Zoro, (Mihawk and Perona are also present)

Summary: As the daughter of Dracule Mihawk, you've spent your life in almost complete solitude. But that changed one day when a green-haired swordsman makes a smashing appearance.

Word count: 5k

Chapter One: The Fall of a Swordsman

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--

Your life began when a moss headed man crashed into the pavement outside, you just hadn't known it yet. 

It was the second time someone had fallen to Gloom Island since you had been alone. Your father had been called away to help with an execution, and he had forbid you to tag along. The Warlord had left you alone several times before, but this was the first time a person had come crashing into your castle. And now that number had doubled to two.

You and Perona peered out the window, looking at the place of impact. 

“I think he’s dead,” you said, looking down at him from your second story bedroom.

“He looks familiar…” Perona mumbled. “We should go see.”

You frowned at the body outside. “Dad said not to leave the castle while he was gone.” 

“Yeah but aren’t you a little curious?” Perona’s wide eyes were stuck on the unmoving man.

“Not really.” You turned away from the window, back to your room. “The baboons will deal with him if he’s not dead yet.”

“You’re so cold!” Perona pouted at you, and she ran to your door. “I’m going to save him!”

“Suit yourself,” you responded, opening a book. “But I won’t be helping.”

You didn’t see Perona for a few days after that. You knew she had managed to save the green-haired man and drag him back into the castle, and you knew she was tending to his wounds. The sounds of banging and the occasional shout from both of them proved that. 

“I do know him!” She said, entering the kitchen. It was one of the few moments you left your room with a stranger in the house. You had managed to avoid Perona and the stranger whenever you ventured down for food, but you had known it was only a matter of time before your paths crossed. 

“He’s a Strawhat!” she continued. “They were the ones fighting Moria and sent me to this dreadful place in the first place!” 

That caught your attention. “He has that power? He’s that strong?”

“Well, no..” Perona said, thinking back to her time on Thriller Bark. “I think it was a crew mate of his that did that.”

You frowned, but said nothing at that. You did remember the Strawhat Pirates from the news, and your father took an interest in one of the crew members, but you couldn’t remember which one. But you didn’t remember any ability like that being on their wanted poster.

“I guess he’s alive, then.” You tried not to sound too interested. “Will he make a full recovery?”

Perona groaned. “He’s SO needy! And he’s complaining about EVERYTHING! The food, the bed, the way I wrapped his wounds! Nothing is good enough for him, I swear!”

You laughed at the irony of that. Perona hadn’t stopped complaining about this place since she had arrived either. Nothing was ever good enough for her, even in a giant mansion on a secluded island. 

Not that you were upset about her presence. You didn’t mind Perona most of the time. Sometimes you even liked her. But on those days when you just wanted to be alone, she was always there. She was like a little sister who was always demanding your attention, always wanting to do something with you. It had been strange to get used to after such solitude with only you and your father your entire life. 

Perona finished making a sandwich, and looked your way. “You should come see him!”

“I told you, I’m not helping.” You left the words hanging in the air as you walked out, hearing her frustrated breath huff out behind you.

--

You finally met the mysterious intruder a few days later, when he barged into your room unannounced. Your eyes flicked up from your book as your door slammed open. He had mossy green hair and tanned skin, and you could tell he was in good shape under his bandages. He was covered in them, and you could see why he was complaining about Perona’s handiwork. She had wrapped them so tight in some places, you were surprised he could move. 

“Wha--Who the hell are you?!” The man demanded, gawking around your room. Your sword laid next to your chair, and you saw his eyes slide over to it.

“It’s rude to demand someone’s name when you haven’t introduced yourself,” you said, returning your gaze back down to your book. 

You could hear him grit his teeth in frustration, and you resisted the urge to smirk at his reaction. 

“Look, woman, do you know where my swords are or not?”

“Swords?” Now that caught your attention. You looked back at him and found his gaze was still on the sword next to your chair. You closed your book, mentally marking where you were in the story, and then placed it down on the coffee table next to you. 

“That stupid ghost girl stole my swords!” 

You stood and picked up your weapon, turning it over in your hand. “Swords as in multiple?”

“Three.”

“Three?” 

His eye twitched in frustration. “Are you going to help me or not?”

“How long have you been looking for these swords?” You walked over to the door where he was standing. “And don’t ever barge into my room again without knocking first.”

He gritted his teeth, and you could tell he wanted to say something back, but he refrained. He moved out of the way for you to pass through the door. “I’ve been looking for a few days.”

“A few days?” You laughed at that, thinking it was an over exaggeration, but his silence made you realize he was being serious. “You must be bad with directions.”

“It’s not my fault it’s a maze in here!” He shouted back at you. You rolled your eyes and bound down the steps, hoping he was capable enough to follow you. 

“Perona,” You call out at the bottom of the stops. “Where’d you hide this guy’s swords?”

“It’s not my fault!” the pink-haired girl cried, floating into the room. “I told him exactly where they were! Up the stairs and down the hallway!”

“Thanks!” You bound back up the left staircase, and when you got to the top, you realize you didn't see the swordsman anywhere. You had just run down the stairs and then back up them, how had you lost him already?

You didn’t have time to figure out where he went. Honestly, you cared more about his swords than you did about him. You just wanted to see how his blades looked. 

His swords were exactly where Perona described. It was as he said: three swords sitting together in the room. 

You could feel the energy rolling off of one of them when you opened the door. It was respectable for a swordsman to carry a blade with such a strong personality, but you weren’t interested in a sword with an attitude. 

The next one that caught your eye was a sword you never thought you’d see in your lifetime. Shusui, the legendary katana from Wano. The last you heard it had been buried with its previous owner. You unsheathed it and held it out, slashing the air a few times. The balance was perfect, and it almost made you envious of the user. If you didn’t have the sword you possessed now, you would certainly be taking this for yourself. 

You sheathed Shusui and turned your attention to the last sword, a white-hilted one. As you bent down to grab it, a strong hand grabbed your shoulder. You quickly turned, unsheathing your own blade and holding its tip out against the perpetrator’s throat. 

It was that damn pirate. You had been so caught up in looking at his swords, you hadn’t noticed him come in. He was smirking at you with a brow raised, eyeing the sword in your hand. You rolled your eyes and lowered your sword, scoffing at his cockiness. 

“I’ll show you mine if you show me yours,” he said, nodding at the blade in your hand. You squinted your eyes at him suspiciously, but handed your blade over to him and then bent down to pick up the white hilted one. 

As you examined it, you couldn't help but find it familiar-looking. It was a great sword, and it was made with the finest materials by an extraordinarily skilled blade smith. You were jealous of the man who got to call it his own. Wado Ichimonji, you believed it was called. It wasn’t exactly your style, but you could still admire it nonetheless.

You could hear him gasp behind you, and you turn to look. His fingers reached down to run along the light blue blade as he inspected it. 

“Wait-” 

He cried out, more in surprise than in pain, and he yanked his hand away from the blade. You could see that his fingers had beads of blood forming on them, cut by the razortooth edges that ran along the flat of your blade. 

“Sorry, I forgot to warn you.” You sheathed his blade and walked over to him. You reached out for his hand to examine it for any serious damage, but he yanked it away from you. 

You scowled at him, but he continued to inspect your blade, turning it over in his hands. He slashed at the air a few times, and you could feel the waves of air roll over you. If he knew how to actually use the blade to its full capacity, he’d be quite powerful with it. You suspected that the other swords in his possession weren’t by luck.

“Roronoa.” You had been piecing the information together for a while now, and you were fairly certain in your guess of his identity. 

“You know me?” He said, eyeing you cautiously. 

“I’ve heard of you,” you corrected.  Your father occasionally commented on him when he was in the paper, and you knew the story of how he had challenged the Warlord in the East Blue. At the start of the Grand Line, he hadn’t been anything impressive, but over the few months he’d been there, he seemed to have made a name for himself. 

“You have a nice blade,” he said, handing it back to you and walking over to pick up his own. 

“Nikko,” you say, giving it a quick glance before putting it at your side again. “You have nice ones as well. Except that cursed one. I’m surprised you can handle it.”

He chuckled. “Don’t you worry, I’ve got it under control.”

You nodded back to him, not quite sure you believed him. “Are you planning to stay with us for a while?”

He scoffed at your question. “I’m returning to my captain as soon as I can.”

It’s your turn to laugh now. “Good luck. In your condition, you won’t make it to the coast.”

“Yeah well, you don’t know what I’m capable of.”

You snorted at his response, but offered none of your own. With the conversation over, you turned away from him and back to the door to take your leave. 

The sound of rock collapsing comes from the swordsman’s direction, and your head whipped back around to see what he’s done now. You just catch a glimpse of moss-colored hair jumping out of a cut opening in the stone. 

“You brute!” You screamed down at him as you watched him fall. “What the hell is wrong with you?!?”

But he didn’t respond, he just hit the ground and started running. 

“Where’d he go?!” Perona’s shrill voice came from beside you. “He’s my ticket off this dump of an island!”

“This dump of an island is my home,” you said, irritated with the bubblegum girl. Maybe it would be better for her to take her leave.

“Enjoy it! I’m leaving with him!” She floated through the opening that Roronoa had made, and began chasing after him. 

“Watch out for the-” you shouted as loud as you could, but she was already out of earshot. 

You looked up, as if you were mumbling a prayer. “Father, where are you?”

--

You found them at the wooden cross, surrounded by baboons. You watched from the woods at Roronoa struggling to fight, and as the baboon went in for the kill, you jumped in front of him and sliced the baboon across its chest with Nikko. 

“I don’t need you saving me!” You heard the man call from behind you, anger thick in his voice.

“Oh? You don’t?” You turned back to him and sheathed your sword. “Fine then. Do it yourself.”

Most of the baboons had learned to fear you, but this green-haired stranger was no threat to them. Once your sword was put away and walked out of range, they began their attack against him again. 

You watched the match in disappointment. You expected better from the man who was supposed to best your father in a sword fight. But this was just pathetic.

“Aren’t you going to help him?” Perona screamed at you from above. 

“He doesn’t want my help,” you hissed, loud enough for him to hear. “Why don’t you try, Perona?”

“You think I can take those things?!” She squeaked, and you turned your attention back to the fight, just in time to see Roronoa get thrown backwards into the wooden cross.

He hit it with such force that he left an indent on the wooden marker, and then fell face first into the ground. He laid there for a minute, and you grabbed the hilt of your blade, ready to draw if the baboons made an attack.  

It wasn’t necessary though, because you finally noticed his presence. You relaxed, clicking Nikko back into its sheath. Only a second later did the baboons notice, and they all began to flee from the area. 

Even Perona and Roronoa seemed shocked, and you could see the green-haired swordsman tense at the realization of who was appearing through the fog. He grabbed his cursed blade, using it to pull himself up to his knees. 

“You better not do that, Roronoa Zoro,” your father said, eyeing the man before him. “You’ve been injured beyond your limit. Do you think you can beat me when you can’t even beat the baboons?”

You snorted at that, pleased that your father was equally unimpressed with the swordsman. Roronoa Zoro, he called him. 

Mihawk’s gold eyes flicked to you, and he frowned. “I thought I told you not to leave the castle while I was away. I expect a full explanation of the events that occurred while I was absent.”

You bit your lip, frustrated with the reprimand, but said nothing. You knew he wouldn’t listen now. He had bigger things to deal with, like the two new houseguests who had appeared while he was gone. 

“Why the hell are you here?!” Roronoa demanded, looking at your father. 

Your father’s attention moved back to the man on the ground. “I’ve been living in that castle for quite some time. Why are you here?”

“I got blown away by Kuma, a member of the seven warlords like yourself.”

“I see…” Your father looked at you briefly. “Is he telling the truth?”

You nod. “He is.”

“Very well. That explains why Strawhat came to Marineford with other people.”

Roronoa’s eyes got wide at the mention of his captain’s name. “You saw Luffy?! How was he?!? Was he alright?!”

Your father seemed unfazed by the green-haired man’s desperation. “He’s still alive probably. But I assume that he’s been very badly traumatized.”

“What happened?”

“He lost his brother.”

Roronoa blinked. You could see every muscle in his body tighten in anguish. “What did you say?”

“Fire-Fist Ace died before Strawhat’s eyes.”

Everyone stood there for a moment, frozen. You could tell the news had rocked the pirate. His facial expressions were extremely easy to read. He looked confused, angry, helpless, and upset all in the same moment. 

After a moment, he struggled to his feet. “I have to go. I have to go find Luffy.”

After the swordsman and Perona took off, your father looked at you with a frown. You knew he was disappointed, but you weren’t entirely sure what you had done to make him feel that way. 

“Please explain to me why there are two new people on this island.”

You began walking back towards the castle. “I believe Roronoa is right. Kuma sent them here, separately. There was a pawprint impact zone around Perona when she arrived on the grounds. I did not leave to inspect Roronoa’s site when he arrived a few days later because it was outside of the castle grounds.” You paused for a moment, letting him absorb all of the information. “I didn’t leave the grounds, father.”

“And yet you are off them now,” he shot back. 

“They were in danger! I couldn’t-”

“I do not care about the lives of those two. And I do not appreciate you risking your own life to save them.” You heard it as he paused to keep his voice from rising any further. The worry laced in his voice that was initially masked as anger. He took a breath, and his voice returned to his normal cadence when he speaks again. 

“Do not do it again.”

You grinned at him, deciding to press your luck. “You were worried about me, weren’t you?”

“You can handle yourself. I am aware of that.”

You laughed lightly, and decide to abandon the topic. You had missed your father desperately while he was gone. 

“How was Marineford?” you asked. 

“Like I said, the execution was successful.”

“But how was it?” you pressed. Sometimes your father forgot to turn off the whole mystery persona with you. 

He hummed, thinking how to describe it. “There were some complications. Mainly Roronoa’s captain. He’s quite a problem for the Navy.”

You chuckled at that. “Runs in the crew, I guess.”

“What do you mean? Has he been a problem?”

You looked at him, irritation on your face. “There's a hole in one of the second story guest bedrooms now. He got irritated with how complicated it was to navigate the castle and just cut his way out.”

Your father frowned. “I see. They’ll be quite troublesome houseguests, won’t they?”

You were so shocked by his response that you stopped in your tracks. “They’re staying?”

“Do you think they’re going to get off this island in their current state?”

You laughed at that question. You had been thinking the same thing. At least someone was of the same mindset as you. 

----

Later that night, you heard Perona enter the castle. Based on her grunts of frustration, she was carrying the swordsman. He lasted longer than you thought he would. You chose to lock your bedroom door that night. The last thing you needed was to wake up to a lost, poorly bandaged swordsman barging into your room. 

Every morning, you would hear Roronoa scream as he woke up, which prompted Perona to scream in return. The two of them would hobble out of the castle, trying to fight their way to the coast. And every night, long after sunset, Perona would drag the swordsman back into the castle and rebandage his wounds. Just for the cycle to repeat the next day.

You wanted to scream at the mossy-haired man. He would never get anywhere if he didn’t let his injuries heal. If he just rested for one or two days, he might have enough energy to make it. But he refused to rest. The only thing he could think of was his captain. 

“How long do you think he’ll keep doing this?” You asked your father, spreading some butter on your toast. You had fallen into a strange pattern over the past two weeks with your houseguests, but you were getting tired of it.

“It is…unclear.” You could hear the disapproval in his voice, and you laughed at it. 

“You told the baboons not to kill him, didn’t you?” 

You looked over at him inquisitively, but he didn't respond. 

“He’s such an arrogant swordsman. Why are you sparing him?” 

You were met with silence again, causing you to huff in frustration and pick up the News Coo. 

“Oh, you were correct,” you said, looking at the front page. “There’s news of Roronoa’s Captain today on the front page. He’s alive.”

“Let me see!” A girlish squeal came from behind you, startling you. She grabbed the paper out of your hands, staring at it. “I’ll need to show Zoro!”

“Hey! I was reading that!” You screamed after her, but she whisked away without looking back at you. 

“There’s still time to go talk to the baboons,” you grumbled as you stood from the table and began to retreat to your room. You could hear your father chuckle behind you, but you didn’t bother looking back. 

You spent the day in your room, and were surprised to hear the pink and green-haired combo come back earlier than usual. The sun was still up, and based off of the sounds they were making, the swordsman was still conscious. 

You tiptoed down the hall and stood near the base of the stairs, hidden from sight. 

“I want to beat you!” You heard Roronoa scream. You decided to peek around the corner to get a better view of what was occurring, and you could see that the swordsman was bowing before your father. It was not a sight you expected to see, especially in conjunction with the words he had just spoken. 

Your father laughed at his words. A full, hearty laugh. “You’re asking me to train a swordsman who wants to kill me? You’re insane. And what you’re asking is nonsense. Even so, what you’re doing is still embarrassing.” But the swordsman stays kneeling, waiting for an answer, and your father watches him with interest. “Seems like you found something more important than your ambition. Hey, ghost girl. Treat him.”

Perona pouted from her place near your father. “Don’t tell me what to do!”

You took the opportunity to step out into view of the room. “I’ll do it,” you offer. “I’ll treat him.”

Your father watched you with his sharp gold eyes, hesitating for a moment. But he nodded in agreement after a brief pause, coming to a decision. 

“Very well. The training will begin when you’re recovered.”

“Thank you,” Roronoa said, struggling to stand on his feet. You offered no assistance. If he could not walk to the medical bay on his own, then he did that to himself. 

You walked alongside him in silence. He didn't ask for help, and you didn’t offer it. It was a slow and painful walk to the medical room, but the swordsman completed it on his own. 

You pulled his bandages off gently, unraveling the long mess of Perona’s handiwork up his arms and down his torso. He had plenty of fresh wounds both internally and externally, but the wound that caught your eye was an old one that ran diagonally across his chest. You were certain the cut was made by Yoru, and your fingers began to run across it to examine it further, but Roronoa smacked your hand away. 

“Do you mind?” He hissed, pulling away from you. 

You rolled your eyes, but abandon the inspection and walk to the back of the room. As he limped over to the bed, you grab a new roll of bandages and gauze. 

“You should shower before we rebandage everything to give it a chance to breathe,” you said, looking through the cabinets. “There’s a bathroom through the second door you can shower in.”

“I showered two days ago,” he said simply, sitting on the bed unmoving. 

You paused what you were doing and turned to look at him. “Exactly. Go shower.”

“I don’t need to.”

You frowned. “Yes, you do.”

You heard him suck in a breath of air. “I’m not showering, woman. Rebandage my wounds or leave me alone.”

It was his tone that really irritated you, and Nikko was in your hand before you knew it. You slashed the air, sending a blunt force air cannon to smack him in the back of the head. 

“Go shower!” You screamed at him, just as the strike made contact with his head. 

You heard him grunt in pain, and quickly resheathe your blade and continue to search for more bandages.

“What the hell?!” he said, looking back at you. But you acted like nothing happened, and you heard him get off the bed and shuffle towards the bathroom to fulfill your request. He was mumbling curses under his breath, but you’d take the win. 

It takes him a long time to reemerge from the bathroom, and you picked up the News Coo from this morning to finish reading. You read about Monkey D. Luffy’s 16-bell toll at Marineford, and his honoring the fallen in the battle. There’s a full analysis of whether the pirate was marking the dawn of a new era or if he was declaring war, which you found particularly boring. 

You finally heard the click of the door, and the swordsman reappeared from a steam-filled bathroom. You smiled proudly at your small accomplishment, seeing his freshly washed hair fall over his face like strands of algae. He hobbled over to the bed and gently sat down on it. You were still reading the article about his captain and decided to ask him something that had been weighing on your mind. 

“What’s with his tattoo?” You asked, looking back to the picture. “3D is crossed out, and 2Y is written.”

“It’s not a tattoo.” He winced slightly as he adjusts himself on the mattress. “It’s a message. We made a promise to meet at a certain place three days later.”

“And that meeting time was moved to two years from now?”

He nodded. “Exactly. Everything else was for publicity. This is a message exclusively for us. Luffy made a decision. Meet at Sabaody in two years.”

“It sounds like your captain is quite smart.”

He snorted at that remark. “He’s not.”

You laughed at his bluntness and put the paper down. At least the swordsman was honest. 

You picked up his arm with your hands, and you can feel his strong muscles tense in your grip. “Relax,” you demand. He was always so damn rigid. 

You rubbed his forearm, lightly massaging it along upwards to his biceps, and then his shoulder. You worked in silence, besides Roronoa’s occasional groan or your scolding hiss to get him to stop tensing. 

By the time you got to his mid-back, he had finally started to loosen up, and you could feel his muscles responding to your touch. You went down to his lower back before curving across and starting on his opposing shoulder to work your way down his other arm. 

You could feel his eyes on you, watching you silently as you stayed absorbed in your work. Your father had done this to you hundreds of times over your life. You could only hope it felt as relieving for Roronoa as it did all of the times your father had done it for you. 

You stopped when you got to his fingers, and looked up at him. “Do you mind if I bandage your wounds now, Roronoa?”

He stared at you for a moment with a bewildered look in his eyes. You stare back, refusing to look away. Your father always taught you that it showed weakness to look away first. It was better to start out intimidating and then loosen up around others once you knew they were trustworthy. But pirates were rarely trustworthy. 

“Zoro,” he choked out, his eyes finally skirting away from yours. “You can call me Zoro. And yes, uh, you can. Do the bandage thing, I mean.”

You nodded and picked up the bandages to begin wrapping his arm. You could hear him huff a frustrated sigh, and you curiously looked over at him. 

“Well?” he said, looking at you expectantly. 

You felt your eye twitch at his sudden moodiness. “What?” you shot back, matching his energy. 

“Are you going to introduce yourself?”

Right. You knew a lot about Roronoa Zoro, but he didn’t know anything about you. You introduced yourself with your name, but didn’t offer any other information. 

He accepted that introduction, at least for the moment, and you finish wrapping both of his arms in silence. When you were finished, he flexed under his bandages, and he smiled a bit. 

“You’re better at this than that other girl.”

You laughed at that, starting on his torso area. “I’ve had a lot of practice.”

“What did you do before you got here?”

You paused, looking at him. “What do you mean?”

He shrugged, messing up a piece of your wrap and forcing you to start over. “Didn’t Kuma send you here too? Like me and Perona?”

“Oh. No,” you clarified. “I’ve been living on Gloom Island for about seven years now.”

“Seven years?”

You nodded and kept wrapping, but Roronoa didn’t let the conversation go. “What have you been doing for seven years?”

“Training, I guess. Reading. Exploring the island.”

He tensed. “But the baboons…”

You shot him a look. “Stop tensing or it’ll be too tight on you. The baboons aren’t anything to worry about. There’s only one or two on the island I have some trouble with.”

“Tch. Whatever you say.” You could tell he thinks you’re lying, but you don’t care. You finished wrapping his torso and gave him one last check-over to make sure the bandages all held. 

“Why Dracule Mihawk?” you finally ask, curiosity getting the better of you. 

He raised an eyebrow at you. “What do you mean?”

“Why train under him? Why work to defeat him?”

His eyes narrowed at you, as if he was trying to comprehend what you were asking. “He’s the best, isn’t he?”

You nod, and the swordsman gets a wicked grin across his face. 

“I’m going to beat him and the best. My name is going to be so famous, it’ll reach the heavens.”

“I see,” you said slowly, watching him. You could see in his expression that he means it, and he’ll stop at nothing to reach his goal. You went to take your leave, stopping at the door and turning to look at him one last time. 

“Then I wish you luck in that journey, Zoro.”

#one piece #one piece imagine #one piece scenario #one piece fanfiction #one piece x reader #one piece self insert #zoro #roronoa zoro #zoro x reader #zoro x y/n #zoro x you #cozage #TMTGIG #✧˚zoro✧˚

[some-pers0n]

Okay after seeing that nuclear bad take about Albatross being a "fucking psycho", here!! Get another one of these emotional rants of mine.

Albatross is a character I think a lot of people misunderstand. I think a good chunk of the reason why this somewhat new obsession I have over him was kick-started by just how many times I saw people on Reddit or in YouTube video comments go on and on about how he was insane in the membrane and was a pure evil dragon. It reminds me of my thoughts on Orca as well, where I don't want to take her at face value and see her as this dragon who just wanted to take over the throne. That's boring. I like the idea of her being something more.

But with Albatross? We've got a lot more evidence pointing to him being more than just "crazy old dragon". Reading the text, you see that Albatross is just kinda..sad? He's miserable and I personally get the feeling that he regrets having spent decades being bossed around by Lagoon. That he's tired of being seen as this freak-show dragon who could snap at any moment. He did once all of those years ago, and now it haunts him ever since.

Lagoon (and Sapphire to an extent) and their impact on Albatross's life is one that I find extremely overlooked. I don't know how people can think Albatross had no reason to do any of this and was just "snapping because he lost all of his soul" when Lagoon literally was egging him on just minutes before the massacre happened. He was being shown like a disfigured and disturbing trophy to the SkyWings. Statues of herself built by Albatross for no other reason than to have statues of herself. Lagoon flaunted her control over him and how he could do anything for her, mentioning ideas for enchantments that'll make her immortal. When Albatross speaks up, she shuts him down. She emotionally manipulates him by bringing up Sapphire again, saying that he'll never live it down. She then goes on to say how happy she is about how Fathom is an animus, excited to finally replaced her old, snappy, and unreasonable brother.

How much more obvious can you get that Lagoon was manipulating and controlling Albatross? For god's sake we even see this in the guide as well, with Lagoon bringing up Sapphire again. Lagoon uses that one tramatic event as leverage for everything. Something that she did is now Albatross's fault forever because he swiped back. He didn't want to be beaten down and made fun of anymore. He didn't want to be tormented by them any longer.

It's a moment that haunts Albatross. He regrets it deeply. It was an accident, but Lagoon won't ever make him forget it. She used the guilt that Albatross felt and made him do anything she wanted. How could he do such a thing? Cut off his sister's talons and drive her to madness? Lagoon knew how much this incident impacted Albatross. She wanted to make sure he always knew that it was his fault. That, no matter what, he will never live down being the one to ruin Sapphire's life.

His entire life he's more or less been just a means for Lagoon to exploit. A tool for her to use whenever she wanted something. The Summer Palace was more or less a vanity project, where Lagoon could show off how she has two palaces now. I don't think he ever used animus magic for himself. The only time he acted of his own accord, he would be snapped at by Lagoon. Him being mentioned to have traumatized dragonets by setting the trees ablaze during a Talons of Power ceremony was, again, brought up by Lagoon so that she could remind him of how he's unstable and should listen to her.

Not to also mention that he was described by Fathom as kind, albiet distant and somewhat cold at times. I don't think he was evil. He was a dragon who was spat into a world that was unkind and took advantage of him at every moment. Him being different than the others was the catalyist for everything. He was told he would be nothing more than an unstable, murderous dragon who could snap at any moment.

And he did just that, didn't he?

#wof #wings of fire #albatross wof #I am THE No. 1 Albatross sympathizer and don't you get that wrong #Hdodhekdbkehre again like. I don't condone his actions or think he was right to kill Lagoon (shocking I know) #But to dwindle him down to “lunatic with a knife” is ASININE #Treat him like the misunderstood and tragic villain he is #sp-rambles

[algea]

Ghoul School (pt 2)

prompt: when you get out of the hospital, Lars has put it onto himself to take care of you until you're healed. I can confirm that there is a big chuck of text where you're really pissed off at him before he gets his shit together!

warnings: tbh i literally dont even know. umm yeah your shin is broken and you're concussed so. things may or may not get a little steamy...cussing duh

a/n: im super mega surprised all my Lars stuff has gotten popular; i think it’s very insanely unhealthy how much i love James Acaster.

~ there are a LOT of little secret references to James in here, comment what you picked out ;)

~ also this is probably longer than the first part idk, but its officially the longest post ive written @jesssuperwholock03

~requested by @thestralluvr

Lars visited you everyday. Every morning, every evening after work, sometimes even over his lunch breaks, like clockwork. You were beginning to think it was seriously unhealthy. You were lying in the hospital bed, 4 days after the incident, with your eyes closed. You heard a soft click of the door and you cracked your eyes slightly. You, being oh-so-surprised, were met with the tired face of your crush colleague and work partner. He wore his jumper tied around his waist, a dark colored button up adorning his body. His hair looked disheveled, which could only mean he had just finished a job. He looked so tired, more tired than you've ever seen him be. It was annoying, honestly. Annoying how attractive he was without even trying. 'Why can't I look like that' you thought to yourself, mentally frowning. You decided to acknowledge his presence, seeing how he took time, again, out of his day to come and visit you.

"Lars." You stated, turning your head look over at him. Lars froze, gazing down at your solemn face. You started to reach out to him, but thought otherwise and rested your hand back on the crisp sheets. You watched as he pushed his glasses up and pulled a chair to sit beside you. Lars rested his forearms on the edge of the bed, his hands clasped.

"I was told that you'll be able to get out of here today." He whispered, his tired eyes searching your face. He was desperate for you to come back, back to how things used to be, where he would tease you, and you would always find witty comeback. But he knew you couldn't, not for a while at least. Lars was so scared you weren't going to be able to work for Ghost Corps anymore, especially since the concussion you got really fucked up your head. Not to mention your shin, which was a huge impact on you.

Lars let out a shaky breath. He unclasped his hands and ran one through his hair. You reached out, more confidently this time, and rested your hand on his. He didn't move his hand; he was scared if you let go, you'd disappear.

"Lars." You said again, your face flashing with worry. Your other hand softly touched his chin, holding his face so delicately.

"I'm scared that you're not going to come back." Lars stated, grimacing at the words that flew out of his mouth.

"Why wouldn't I come back? What made you think this?" You asked, your eyebrows drawing together in a sad furrow.

"I want things to be the same, I don't want things to change." He whispered quietly, his eyes cast down.

"I think you and I both know that it won't be the same, neither of us want to admit it. Normally, you don't go around kissing people and pretend like you hate each other for the rest of your life." You explained, searching his eyes for an answer. His eyes glanced back at you as his cheeks burned with pink. You tipped his head to the side ever so slightly, your thumb brushing over his cheekbone.

"That's unfair, Lars. You can't expect me to leave you alone after that." You pleaded.

"Can we just drop it? It really doesn't fucking matter right now.” Lars snapped. You drew your hand away from his face, hurt flashing across your face.

“What I meant was that we should focus on getting you out of here.” He frantically explained. He reached for your hand, but you pulled away again. Lars had never felt an emotion like this. His ears were ringing and his brain was hazy. It could’ve only been described as embarrassment. He wouldn't cry, no, that's not what he wanted to do. He wanted to apologize over and over again until you'd forget he ever did anything or said anything.

“I think it's maybe time for you to go. When I get out, do me a favor and send Lucky and Pheebs to get me.” You muttered, looking down at your hands. Lars sat there for a few moments, his jaw clenched. He wanted to say something, anything, to make you understand how he felt. Instead, he got up and, with a longing gaze down at you, left.

You felt hot tears sting your eyes, which you allowed to fall down your cheeks. If he wanted to play that dumbass game again, you could do it, just not like you used to. You didn't realize that you were holding your breath until he walked out of the door, not looking back. You slammed your hand down on the bed in a fit of rage, which turned into a soft cry. You wished that you could make better sense of it all, but your wishes never came true.

It was only 2 hours after that you were discharged. Lucky and Phoebe, just as you had requested, rushed in to see you as soon as they could.

"Y/N!" Phoebe exclaimed, running to you and giving you a big hug. You smiled and hugged her back, or at least as much as you could with your crutches. Lucky joined in on the hug before you parted and started making your way to the car.

"Everyone is so happy you're coming home! We've all been super worried." Phoebe smiled, giving you a big smile.

"I'm so happy I get to see you guys again, Pheebs." You grinned back, ruffling her hair. Your mind wandered to Lars as you crutched your way to the car.

"Has um..." You started, realizing that the words were harder to get out of your mouth than you thought.

"He's not here. I haven't seen him since we went out this morning." Lucky explained, catching on to what you were about to ask. You looked down and nodded. 'Of course, how could I be so goddamn stupid.' You thought. Phoebe helped you into the car while Lucky set your crutches next to you. Trevor was driving, which was a whole other risk to be taking.

"Since when did they let you drive?" You asked, grinning at Trevor.

"Since Lars bailed at the last minute. I'm a great driver, so I have no idea what you're even talking about." Trevor bragged. 'He bailed at last minute? He never does that...' You thought sadly. He could've just been working really hard on whatever science thing he was studying. You really didn't know, but it did cut a little.

You didn't know you were carsick until you let Trevor drive you home. You thought Lars was a bad driver, but you quickly realized that Trevor was on the list of 'Never-Ever Drive Me Again,' along with Gary and Ray. You made a mental note of that as you struggled to stand to get out of the car. Trevor quickly rushed to your side to help you, easily pulling you up. You casted your gaze up, which fell on the Firehouse. 'Oh good, he won't be here.' You thought, as a feeling of relief washed over you. You hobbled in next to Phoebe and Trevor with Lucky trailing in not far behind. Callie and Gary stood right after the door, waiting for your arrival. As soon as you entered the Firehouse they were by your side, giving you warm 'hello's' and 'I'm so happy you're back and ok.' You were quick to hug them, hoping to talk to them about your situation with Lars.

"Alright kiddos, time to let the adults talk." Gary clapped, shooing away the smaller kids.

"Hey but I'm not-!" Trevor started, but was dragged away by Lucky. You three sat down around a table. It was silent for a moment as you tried to say what was on your mind.

"Did he come see you?" Callie asked, leaning in close.

"He came and saw me everyday. Sometimes up to three times." You whispered, your hands clasped together. Callie and Gary looked at each other.

"But when he came and saw me this morning, he was different. He was super moody, and got upset when I tried to confront him about kissing me like you said for me to do. I don't know if he doesn't like confrontation or if he, yknow, might be seeing someone else." You went on, nervously biting your nails.

"Y/N, I seriously doubt that there's many women who actually like Lars, much less want to even date him." Gary said, using his left hand to talk. 'Is he right? But I'm sure women think Lars is attractive.' You thought, scrunching your eyebrows together.

"I'm pretty certain that you're like the only woman he's ever talked to in a romantic way, probably even the only woman he’s ever even talked to." Callie confirmed.

"Either way, he likes you. We all know that." Gary finished. You were really hoping he was right, otherwise you were a fool being played.

You chatted for a little while longer, mostly about anything and everything that came to mind. After a while, you told them that you were ready to head home.

"I'll drive you home." Callie said, standing up and grabbing the keys. The ride home was filled with you and Callie singing awful 80's songs, the vast majority of them by Tears for Fears. That was something that cleaned your soul and freed your mind a while. Callie helped you into your apartment before she left with a hug and a warm 'see you soon.' You were seriously hoping that your torture would end.

After a day, you got restless. So restless that you decided to go back to the lab and start working again. Yes, it was idiotically stupid. No, you weren't going to listen to anyone and take a break. Honestly it was going to happen anyways. You walked into the lab the first day, partially hoping that Lars was going to be there, but alas he wasn't. You felt disappointment but you were hopeful that you'd see him tomorrow. Except you didn't. More days past by and you hadn't seen any sign of Lars in the lab at all. You were starting to get more and more worried.

It had been more than a week and you hadn’t seen Lars since. Concern was growing and you were growing weary waiting for him to return. It was extremely hard taking care of yourself, especially since you had to trek a long ways to get yourself to your car outside of your apartment. Finally, you decided it was time to go see Lars. It pissed you off so much that you were running to him, instead of him coming to you. You knew his place, mostly because you, Phoebe, Trevor, and Lucky would sometimes prank him by doing something so absurd he would tremble with anger. That was back when you had your little schoolgirl crush on him, before you realized that you loved him.

You decided to walk, opting for the fact that he knows your car all too well. You weren’t even sure if he was there, you really didn’t even bother checking to see in your group FindMy. You didn’t even bother use your crutches because they were stupid anyways, you could walk just find even though you had a little limp. God you just wanted to fucking punch his stupidly handsome face. He made your blood boil so much.

You were only a few blocks from from his house when it started to rain. Not just a light rain, but a pour. You grew a little worried for your cast, but continued on. You were completely drenched by the time you were on his doorstep. Even worse, it was cold out. You stood on his doorstep for a minute before you started to knock on his door. You breathed out, seeing your own breath in the air. You were so cold. No one answered, which was pretty typical for Lars. He was probably standing in the kitchen, not going to open the door.

"Lars!!" You yelled, knocking on the door some more. Water dripped from your face and you shivered again. The door still didn't open. You sighed and started walking away, the pouring rain drenching you again. You started to tread back to your apartment when you heard a loud bang and turned your head. There Lars was, standing in the doorway, eyes wide as he stared at you.

"Y/N!" Lars yelled back, meeting you in the rain. He craned his head to look down at you, his hands flying to meet your face.

"What are you doing here?" He said, his thumb swiping at your cheek.

"I came to see you. Where the fuck have you been, Lars Pinfield?!" You boomed, your right hand gripping the front of his shirt. His head dropped and he closed his eyes.

"I...I couldn't face you after that dumb shit I pulled. I wanted to apologize, really I did, but I couldn't bring myself to face you." Lars explained, his breath creating a misty cloud. All that either of you could do was stare at each other incredulously.

“Are you fucking stupid? I’ve wanted to see you all week, but your dumbass wouldn’t show up. Jesus Christ Lars, do you have any clue how much I’ve missed you? You’re so goddamn unfair you know that?!” You screamed, pounding on his chest. Lars’ hands moved from your face to your waist, holding you steady while you angrily punched him. He could only see you through his hair, which now stuck to his forehead, and his rain covered glasses which were fogging up. He was freezing, but all he could ever think about was you. How cold were you? Why would you sacrifice your time, hell, your health to come see him. He really couldn’t understand it. He couldn’t comprehend why someone would ever do that for someone. You would think with him being such a genius he would figure it out, however some people can be dense. But he realized that you were giving up all your time to invest in him. So, he decided that he needed to do the same.

"Do you think, maybe, that you'd want to spend the rest of your life, with me, maybe not just hating each other. And maybe not while hating each other, you'd like to be with me, y'know, for a long while?" Lars whispered, causing you to stop throwing punches. You looked up at him, in all his rain drenched glory. God, he looked so beautiful. You began to tremble, your hands lifting to capture his face with them. Lars breath quickened, his large hands gripping your waist. His hazy blue eyes captured yours, holding you in his everlasting gaze.

"Lars..." You murmured, swiping your thumb across his bottom lip. It was soft, softer than you thought it would've been. You found yourself daydreaming again about kissing him, though you'd never let him know how many times you've done it. You realized how close you were after you felt his breath against your cheek. You leaned in closer, pressing your chest against his. It was like something out of a movie, the way time stopped then. When your lips pressed against his, your body shuddered. It was like fireworks went off inside of you, making you all jittery and excited. Lars' hands slipped from your waist to your ass, softly gripping the flesh there. You slipped your fingers into his blond locks, tugging lightly. You heard a light groan rumble from his chest as he pressed into you further.

You weren't sure if the rain mixed with the cold had made you delirious, but after Lars had pulled away, it made him look even hotter. His tousled, wet hair, his lips that were red after the kiss, the ruby flush that adorned his cheeks and ears, and his half-lidded eyes made him even more beautiful. You found yourself feeling heat creep up through your neck to your cheeks as he stared down at you.

“Shit, right, you need to get inside, now.” Lars commanded, dragging you towards the door.

“Lars—!” You exclaimed, eyes widening as he basically picked you up. Your hands fly to grip the shirt on his back as you hoists you over his shoulder. He muttered a few things under his breath as he strolled to the door, obviously not caring that the rain was coming down harder. Lars opened the door, set you down, and shut the door with the heel of his shoe.

“Give me a second.” He commanded, leaving you standing in the foyer. You shivered and looked around, noticing some things that seemed quite out of place. Lars had multiple different band posters framed and hung up around the house, most of them signed. You could pick out a few like Pindrop, Temps, and the Timewasters. You also found multiple different movie titles like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and other things. ‘Interesting’ You thought as you took in your surroundings. Lars appeared again with a towel and some sort of clothes he had found for you to wear.

“If you fuck up my good clothes, I’m kicking your ass to the curb again.” Lars sighed, throwing the towel at you.

“Whatever, brainiac.” You bit back, trying to hold back your grin as you shoved past him. That earned a scoff and an eye roll from Lars.

“Washroom is down the right hall, second door to the left.” He called, peaking down at you as you went to change.

Lars had never had a girl in his house before. Other than the times his mother and sister had come over from Britain, obviously. His “outside” friends insisted that he bring a girl home, but he couldn’t ever bring himself to when he could only think of you. It made him a little giddy knowing that you were here with him. It was like a fever dream, if he woke up it all would be gone. He wanted to pinch himself to make sure that there was a way to prove that this was real. Lars found himself wondering if you liked how his house was decorated, the clothes he brought you, even the way the house smelt. At the thought of these, he began to worry that you didn’t like it here. Those thoughts were denied when you waddled back from the bathroom, furiously rubbing at your hair to dry it. It was silly, really. Lars thought you looked a little too good in his clothes. His Temps T-shirt was too big for you, and his plaid pj pants were rolled a few times to even try and fit you.

“You look stupid in that.” Lars scoffed once more, looking anywhere but your face.

“Hey man, you picked this out. Don’t blame me for your shit style.” You tried back. A hint of a smile could be found dawning his face. You smirked and poked his cheek.

“Is that a smile I see? Is the Lars Pinfield smiling in my presence?” You giggled, covering your mouth with your hand to fake gasp.

“No, it isn’t.” He replied, the smile growing wider on his face.

“It so totally is!!! Lars Pinfield is literally smiling right in front of me!” You exclaimed. He shook his head.

“Shut up. Anyways, I’m getting changed, don’t fucking break anything.” Lars sighed, sliding past you.

“You can put on anything, just as long as it’s not some stupid BritCom.” He added, shutting the door to his room.

“Who even watches BritComs…” You muttered to yourself. Walking back into the main foyer, you sat down on the sofa, which was surprisingly nice compared to how you thought your scientist boyfriend colleague lived. You sat down and flicked through the channels, stopping on whatever stupid romcom movie was on. You sighed and put your chin in your hand, anticipating the snappy response of ‘this is the shittiest movie I’ve ever seen.’

“Hey.” You heard from above you. Looking up, you saw Lars resting his elbows on the top of the sofa next to you.

“Hi.” You peeped back. Secretly, you were gawking at him. Lars wore a pair of white sweatpants and a black shirt. You’ve never seen him in casual wear, but you were absolutely loving it right now. His glasses weren’t pushed up, loosely sitting below the bridge of his nose, and his hair was still damp. If this wasn’t heaven, you didn’t know what was.

“What’re we watching?” He asked, glancing down at you. You shivered when his eyes locked on to yours.

“Some stupid romcom, you probably won’t like it anyways.” You answered.

“You’re right, I’ll probably think it’s super shitty, but I’ll watch it anyways.” He sighed, tipping his head towards you. You reached up and placed a kiss on his lips. Lars scrunched his eyebrows and sighed. After you pulled away, you patted the seat beside you, beckoning him to sit down. He all but scrambled to get next to you, plopping down with another big sigh.

“How’s your leg?” Lars asked once more, motioning to it with his eyes.

“It has definitely seen better days.” You replied earnestly. He nodded in sincerity, then turned his attention back to whatever you were watching. You looked over at him again before reaching over and slipping your hand into his. He didn't move, so you considered it a win. Taking matters into your hands again, you slid closer to him and rested your head on his shoulder. Lars' head rested on top of yours immediately and you smiled as he snuggled in closer. You could smell whatever cologne he was wearing, a citrusy, vanilla smell.

"You smell good." You muttered, looking up at him through your lashes. Lars didn't reply, but you could definitely imagine the look on his face. That little embarrassed smile with a scarlet blush dusting his cheeks. You found yourself becoming a little sleepy as you settled in. Blinking a few times, you tried to wake yourself up, but that only made you even more sleepy. Unintentionally, you started to fall asleep. As you drifted off to sleep, you could hear Lars mutter something to you, but you didn't respond.

Somehow, in the middle of the night, you had moved from the sofa, to Lars' bed. Now you only had 2 options as to how you got there. 1. You sleep walked to the bed and magically laid down, or 2. Lars had carried you there. You groaned and opened your eyes, lifting a hand to rub them. You blinked a couple times and sat up. No, Lars wasn't in here. So then, where was he? You slipped out of bed and stumbled to the kitchen, finding that he wasn't there either. A cup of coffee and some breakfast was left on the counter, along with a note saying,

'I'll be back later, got a couple things I need to work on at the lab. I left you some breakfast and I'm sure you can fend for yourself for lunch. Please don't burn the house down. - Lars' You smiled and picked up the coffee, finding that it was still steaming. You noticed that Lars had made the coffee the way you liked it, which meant he definitely paid attention whenever you ordered it.

After basically spending the whole day exploring Lars' house, you settled into the sofa once more with a random book you had picked out of his bookcase. Hearing keys jingle, you lifted your head from the book and saw Lars venture in. You slowly got up, minding both your head and leg, and made your way over to him.

"Hi handsome, how did work go?" You smiled at him, leaning against the doorway.

"It was...eventful. I got thrown up on by pukey." Lars sighed. You laughed and patted his shoulder.

"That was probably hilarious. I'll make dinner while you take a shower." You said, pushing him along to the bathroom.

"Mmmm, fine. But..." He started before he swooped down and kissed you. Your hand flew to his hair, giving it a nice tug. With that came a loud groan. Lars' gripped your waist and pushed you against the wall. His tongue swiped at your lips, which you gladly accepted. You snatched his glasses and tossed them away, squirming slightly as his nails dug your waist. When he pulled away he grinned,

"Looks like I'm not getting my shower in tonight."

#lars pinfield #lars pinfield x you #lars pinfield x reader #ghostbusters #ghostbusters frozen empire #ghostbusters x reader #james acaster #james acaster x reader

[mangowillow]

last to know | ch. 1: haunted dreams

pairing: jungkook x (f) reader / kim woosung x (f) reader

summary: you and jeongguk got together at 16 years old, married at 20, and divorced at 21. what was once love ever after turned into nothing but pain and unfulfilled dreams. you keep going despite the pain in your heart that never really went away, until one day, jungkook comes back— to seoul and in your life.

general story tags: divorce au, childhood friends, angst (who am i without it), hurt & eventual comfort, kind of a slow burn, OC is an adopted child in this fic, a lot of flashbacks later on because context is important; and the others that a lot of people seem to dislike: a love triangle and a LOT of miscommunication. look away if this isn't your thing. tags and warnings will be updated as we go along with each chapter!

warnings: nothing really; well, maybe except seokjin's intrusive thoughts about an axe k*ller— but it's tame, i promise! oh, and jeongguk gets slapped. be nice and let me know if i miss anything! there's a mini flashback in this chapter in all italics marked by a ♥!

word count: 3,900

author's note: i am very nervous about this first chapter because it's been A WHILE since i last wrote ~something~ so anyway! here you go, enjoy!

fic masterlist

New York, 2023

It was right when the DJ turned up the volume that Jeongguk felt the impact of a palm hitting him square in the jaw.

Jeongguk doesn’t know what stimuli to focus on: should it be the loud music blasting through the speakers or the sting of the slap that he probably deserved. It doesn’t take his brain too long to piece together what just happened 5 seconds ago. He knows what’s coming and he is also very much aware that he did see it coming sooner or later.

“Fuck you, Jeongguk,” Ae-cha grits through her teeth. Jeongguk swears she’s about to cry, tears threatening to spill amidst the blue glow of the lights above them. “We are dating, how can you say that—”

“We sleep together when it’s convenient for the both of us, Ae-cha.” Jeongguk downs the rest of his scotch, along with the remnants of his pride. “I never said anything about dating.”

“You are such a jerk!” Ae-cha turns a shade of red, tears in the corners of her eyes. It isn’t the first time Jeongguk has ever made a woman cry, but oddly enough, he doesn’t feel that hollow ache in his chest; the one he felt the first time he made that mistake. He should feel bad, he thinks, but then again, he also doesn’t.

Does that make him a bad person? 

“I didn’t listen to my friends when they said you were trouble. I wanted to prove them wrong—” Ae-cha starts, but Jeongguk cuts her off.

“Why? Why do you have to?”

Ae-cha’s eyes grow wide as she watches Jeongguk stare at his empty glass.

“You should have listened to your friends.” Jeongguk says, matter-of-fact. Ae-cha scoffs and Jeongguk knows now is the right time to probably shut up.

But he’s a jerk, just like Ae-cha says he was.

“I told you right from the beginning… we just use each other because we’re both lonely,” Jeongguk feels his throat turn dry, “I think somewhere along the way, you misread my actions.”

Ae-cha doesn’t move, doesn’t speak. She closes her eyes for a minute and Jeongguk looks at her, waiting for her rebuttal. Or maybe a second slap. Whichever comes first.

Ae-cha speaks in a voice so low, it’s perplexing how Jeongguk is still able to pick up her words— “Your problem is that you do not care about other people’s feelings, Jeongguk. You only care about your own.”

Jeongguk tightens his jaw; now he feels his heart aching.

“You hurt people. You ruin good things. You keep your heart under tight wraps and you do not let anyone in. If you keep that up, you will end up with no one.”

Jeongguk stares at Ae-cha, wanting to say something, but failing completely. Maybe this is what he gets for sleeping with a psychologist— a rude awakening.

Before he can say anything, Ae-cha turns on her heel and walks away. Jeongguk remains at the bar for a bit more until the song changes into a slower tempo. It feels like a chore walking back to the table where his best friend Yoongi was— like walking on lead. 

“That must’ve hurt—” Yoongi starts, fingers reaching out to the peanut bowl and putting some into his mouth. Jeongguk plops down on the chair with a sigh. “What a shitty night,” he quips.

Yoongi hums, “And whose fault is that?” 

Jeongguk looks at his best friend in annoyance. Yoongi chuckles, putting more peanuts into his mouth. “What’d she say?”

“That I’m a jerk who hurts people and ruins good things.”

“Is it true?”

“You tell me.”

“I don’t think I need to do that, kid.” Yoongi concludes, glancing at Jeongguk. He takes a swing out of his beer bottle before continuing, “You know damn well the answer to that.”

Jeongguk clicks his tongue and takes the beer from Yoongi. He takes a swig himself, letting their conversation die out by drowning it into the same old music he’s used to hearing almost every night. 

Jeongguk comes home to his apartment that night, tipsy and his heart in pieces. Walking into the living room, the corner of his eyes catch the stack of luggages already packed and loaded. He didn’t feel like sitting on the couch so he opts to sit on the floor, his fingers grazing the carpet absentmindedly. A beat later, he allows his heart to bleed once more— as he always seems to do every single night for the past few years. Leaning his head back against the edge of his couch, he cries himself to sleep, wishing, praying the ache in his chest—and the words you hurt people—would go away in the morning.

Seoul, 2023

Your eyes try to take in the art in front of you— The Artist’s Garden in Giverny, Claude Monet, 1900. Usually, many emotions overwhelm your system and you cannot help but discuss any painting with the next person willing to listen. 

And once upon a time, you were enthusiastic about your craft and love for the arts. It was almost always too easy, too often that you could come up with pieces to add to your gallery. But that hasn’t happened in over a year— maybe more than. 

In the stillness of the room you are in, you hear light footsteps coming closer to where you are. You keep your eyes trained on Monet’s painting until your brother Seokjin sits beside you.

For a while, you and Seokjin just sit beside each other— no words, only a quiet understanding that close siblings seem to share and empathize with. Seokjin’s parents adopted you when you were eleven; a year after you and your parents met a horrible car collision. You are five months older than Seokin, yet that fact doesn't deter him at all, and more often than not, he usually ends up acting like your older brother. When he first met you at the orphanage, he grew fond of you real quick— already asking his parents when he’d be allowed to play with you. He doesn’t mind that you were once part of the system, that you are his half-sister— not really. He never treated you any differently. He loves you with his whole heart and he will always protect you. 

This is why he also cannot stand stillness at times, especially when it involves you.

“Have you been waiting long?” Seokjin asks.

You have a habit of kicking your right foot into the air when you don’t really know how to respond right away. You take a sharp inhale before shaking your head. Seokjin follows your line of sight— you were still looking at the painting.

“Does it make you feel better? Looking at this, I mean…” 

Seokjin’s question makes you look at him instead, like you just realized he had been sitting there this whole time and you never knew. He meets your eyes, sees the sadness in them. He will always know no matter how hard you try to hide it.

“Happy birthday, ____”

You don’t respond. 

“Taehyung and the others are waiting down at the cafe. Do you still want to meet them?”

You nod once before giving Seokjin a smile, “Of course.”

Seokjin slides into the gap between the two of you and instinctively, you rest your head on his shoulder as he envelops you in a side hug. He rubs a hand up and down your arm before planting a light kiss on top of your head.

“I know it doesn’t get any easier, ____. But I just want you to know that I love you… We all love you.” 

With shaky breath and tears that threaten to spill from your eyes, you whisper, “I know.”

As Seokjin gets into the driver’s seat, you hand him an envelope. Seokjin has an inkling what it is, but he asks you anyway as he squints his eyes at you.

“What is that supposed to be?”

You push the envelope towards him a bit more, just humming, “It’s the last payment.”

Seokjin rolls his eyes as he presses the ignition. He doesn’t take the envelope, “Oh come on, Seokjin, just take it.”

“And for the nth time, you shouldn’t have to pay for something I willingly helped you out for. We’re siblings, for gods sake, ____.”

You lower your hands, setting the envelope on your lap. Eyes cast down you mumble, “I know that. I was able to sell a painting again after a long time and it felt good… But I already told you this before— I’d feel better if you just please take this.” 

Seokjin lets out a sigh— usually he makes that sound when he’s already defeated. 

“Please don’t tell me you’re giving me all the money you worked hard for,” Seokjin starts and you shake your head as soon as you heard the word all. “No, not at all, I— I had some saved up and the rest of it will be for rent.”

You look at Seokjin who still looks suspicious. You playfully roll your eyes and Seokjin sees you smile for the first time that night.

“I promise.”

Seokjin sets his eyes on the parking lot, placing his hands on the steering wheel, “Fine—” you squeal as soon as he gives in and you place the envelope in the glove compartment. “—but this is the last time, all right?”

“Yes sir, that’s the last of the payments,” you respond a tone higher than your usual. Seokjin chuckles as he sets the gear into reverse.

“Are you sure you don’t need any help moving some of your stuff?” Seokjin asks as you fasten your seatbelt.

“Not really, I think I can manage just fine.”

You expect Seokjin to be backing up the car right now, yet he remains unmoving. You chuckle.

“I’ll be fine, Seokjin. Movers will help me move some of the heavier stuff.”

“Listen, ____, I was beyond ecstatic when you told me you were moving out of… there. I just don’t understand why you need to move in somewhere else when you can just stay with me.”

“Seokjin—”

“And it’s not like you have any problems with money or anything, I mean, you are doing okay right?”

“I am,” you answer with a smirk.

“Yah, don’t give me that look, ____. I’m serious, I really don’t understand why you have to stay somewhere else.”

“I already told you. I don’t need a big apartment, I just need a place to sleep. And isn’t it weird if we live together— people are going to think we’re co-dependent.”

Seokjin opens his mouth to argue, but you cut him off, “And I know what you’re going to ask next. Why did I choose to move in an apartment on the other side of the city? And I already told you a dozen times— I need to learn how to be on my own for real this time. And it’s much cheaper compared to all the other apartments in the city center, I mean— have you seen Seoul?”

“Don’t get cheeky with me, woman. Sure yeah, valid, but have you met your neighbors?”

“What does that have to do with anything?” you ask confidently.

“Well, they could be an ax killer or something—”

“Or they could just be an ordinary person with a normal life, Seokjin.” You laugh at your brother’s catastrophic thoughts. You completely understand where he’s coming from— he just wants to protect you.

“That’s only hypothetical,” Seokjin snarks as he stops at a stoplight. You lay your hand on top of his on the console.

“I know you’re worried about me—”

“I am, you brat.”

“And I will forever be grateful… but I need to do this,” you reply calmly, almost like you were whispering. “I hope you understand.”

“I’m trying, ____. It’s not exactly easy to do that when you’re not giving me the grace to understand exactly why you need to do this… when you can just stay with me. The house is too big. And the cafe is right next door!”

“And we will get to that someday… but not right now, hm?” Seokjin sighs in defeat. “I will call you every single night if that will make you feel better.”

“Yah, those kinds of things have to come from the heart, not because you’re forced to do it just to appease me.”

“I’m not… I actually really want to talk to my little brother every day,” you tease as Seokjin scoffs.

“Fine, you have to call me every day, okay? Promise?”

You grin wide, “I promise.”

“And I am not your little brother, we’re only 5 months apart.”

“Doesn’t change the fact that I’m older than you.”

Seokjin grumbles under his breath but a smirk was on his lips, “And you’re always going to be my brat.”

The coffee shop you and Seokjin run together has been passed down by your parents. Ever since Seokjin could utter the word, “coffee,” everyone in the family knew he was destined to manage the coffee chains. Even though you were technically the older one, your parents were more lenient and allowed you to forge your own path. Seokjin understood that and he wouldn’t have it any other way despite your pleas to help him with all the major business work. It has been a few years since the original coffee shop in Seongsu-dong expanded into different branches across Seoul. When you flew back from New York, you immediately put up your own artist studio right beside the cafe. Seokjin even pitched in on the idea of a gallery where people can choose to paint while drinking their favorite latte. Four years later, people now come for the art displays and occasional indie music performances, at times poetry nights. 

Four years later, you were also making a name for yourself as an artist. Seokjin once told you you were a jack of all trades, master of everything because you were crafty with your hands— painting, dress-making, cooking. And you brush him off every single time.

Because if anything, one of your greatest weaknesses was believing whether or not you were good enough for anything or anyone.

Seokjin opens the door for you as you both enter the coffee shop. As soon as you come in, you are greeted by your long-time friends— Taehyung, Hoseok, and Jimin. You met Taehyung and Jimin in New York because you were all fine arts students. Hoseok came into the picture as Taehyung’s lover not long after the three of you came back home to Seoul. 

“There she is, our little star,” Taehyung greets you with his signature boxy smile. His arms are wide open, ready to engulf you in a tight embrace. Jimin and Hoseok follow suit, each with a kiss on the cheek.

“It’s about time you show your pretty face, ____. It’s been ages since we last saw you,” Jimin quips.

“But I text and call you guys almost every day,” you defend. Hoseok pushes a plate of strawberry cake towards you and adds, “It’s not the same as seeing you in the flesh, ____. You look amazing, as always.”

“Thank you, Hobi. That’s reassuring, considering the fact that I haven’t had a good night’s sleep in ages.”

“Too many commissions?” Jimin asks.

“More than that, the gallery show at Seojung Art is in six months, and I still haven’t started on my piece.”

“Do you already know what you’re going to create?” Taehyung asks as he takes a bite of his croissant.

“That’s the problem… inspiration isn’t coming. It’s a bother,” a frown now evident across your face. Jimin holds your hand.

“You know you’re really talented, right, ____? You’ll pull through.”

“Thanks, Jiminie,” you smile at him. 

“Maybe one of the customers’ paintings here could ignite a spark?” Taehyung starts. “I mean, sometimes the best kind of inspiration hits when you least expect it.”

“You’re right. I’ll sleep on it tonight… if I do get to sleep,” you chuckle, but they all know it’s more than that.

Seokjin comes back to the table with your hot mint tea— a drink that almost always helps you fall asleep.

“What’s with the dead atmosphere, guys? It’s been a while since we all got together like this and you’re all moping,” Seokjin jokes. He has always been the life of the party contrary to his very introverted nature.

“It really is a good night, isn’t it?” Taehyung replies as he eats up the last bit of his pastry. “Hoseok and I actually enjoyed the night breeze on the way here because it was just the right amount of chilly.”

“Always the romantic, this one,” Hoseok laughs.

Jimin carefully watches you as you sip your tea in silence. “Are you all settled to move in tomorrow, ____? Do you need help?” 

“I’ll be fine, Jimin. I don't have as much stuff to pack, anyway.”

“Oh yeah that’s right, tomorrow’s moving day. Are you excited?” Taehyung jumps a bit on his seat, suddenly interested in the conversation.

“Not really, I mean, it’s going to be pretty boring moving stuff around, don’t you think?”

“But it’s also the start of a new beginning.” Taehyung supplies.

You smile after taking a bite of the cake, “That is very true.”

Seokjin opens his mouth to talk, but then closes it. He changes his mind anyway, “Her neighbors don’t own axes or something, right Taehyung?”

Taehyung giggles, “I don’t know, hyung, It’s not like I went into every apartment on her floor.”

Seokjin turns pale and Taehyung laughs. Taehyung used to live on the same floor as the one you’re about to move into— before he moved in with Hoseok.

“Seokjin is so worried about the neightbors that he couldn’t stop ranting about it on the way here,” you chuckle. “But as I told him, I’ll be fine.” You placed emphasis on the word fine as you held Seokjin’s hand for reassurance under the table.

“Are you telling that to us or to yourself?” Seokjin starts. He has a way of being so upfront with you that there were moments when it became the cause of your fights and misunderstandings. Seokjin sometimes does not know when to stop, yet you know he always means well. You love and dislike him for it at the same time.

“Hyung…” Jimin readily interjects.

“It’s okay, Jimin…” you put your fork down and paused before looking at Seokjin. “I am telling all of you and myself… that I will be fine. I am honestly really thankful that you’re all here now to keep me company.”

You’ve been saying the word “fine” and “okay” a whole lot that night— you started to doubt if you really are or if Seokjin was right— that you’re just trying to convince yourself of it.

“Are you holding up okay, noona?” Hoseok asks, worried.

“Of course—” you take a sharp exhale before continuing, “It also means that time is helping me get past it. And I am okay with that.”

None of your friends respond. 

“We love you always, ____. You’ll always have us.” Taehyung said.

“Happy birthday, noona,” Jimin smiles. 

Your friends sing you their greetings as Hoseok brings out their surprise birthday cake and flowers. As you try not to cry at their gesture, you try to give them the most genuine smile you can muster. Yet in your heart, you know it’s not enough to convince them. Or yourself.

♥ “You do not get to tell me shit because I have done everything for you—”

“I didn’t ask for any of this, Jeongguk—”

“And yet you still came here with me. If you are really that resentful about moving here… about marrying me— then why did you stay? Why are you still here?”

“I never said I resented you.”

“Yeah? Well it feels like it. You make me feel like shit whenever I can’t help you! God I— you know what? I’m done. I can’t do this with you anymore.”

“W-what do you mean you can’t—”

“—I’m saying we should end this. I want a divorce.”

Yoongi gently shakes Jeongguk’s shoulder to wake him up. “We’re almost landing, Jeongguk-ah,” he whispers.

Jeongguk slightly jerks from his sleep. His body feels heavy, his brain foggy but at the same time trying to recover from the dream he just had.

“It’s the same dream again, isn’t it?” Yoongi asks, knuckles turning white as he holds on to the arm rests. Turbulence has always been a bitch— well, at least to Yoongi. Jeongguk doesn’t answer him; instead, he looks out the plane window, thinking the plane couldn’t land fast enough.

“You keep calling out for her, you know? When you dream, I mean. Did you know that?”

That gets Jeongguk’s attention. He bites down on his lip ring before shaking his head, “No. I didn’t know.”

From baggage claim until Jeongguk and Yoongi exit through arrivals, there has been nothing but silence. Yoongi notices how Jeongguk’s hands couldn’t keep still: he’d take them in and out of his pockets. As they walk to the car that awaits them, Yoongi asks once more— “Are you sure you’re going to be okay?

Jeongguk lets out a long breath before looking at his best friend: “I will be.”

“This is the last of the boxes, ma’am.” One of the movers holds a medium-sized box. “Where do you want me to put it?”

You get up from one of the boxes you were opening, “Oh, that’s okay, I’ll take it. Thank you.”

“I just need you to sign one more thing before we wrap up.”

“Of course,” you take the pen and sign on the dotted line.

“Have a good day,” The movers gave you a small bow before they went on their way. Looking around the room, you let out a sigh. The apartment is bigger than you initially thought but you are happy about that. There’s an extra room spacious enough to set up a painting studio. 

Your eyes land on the last box that was given to you by the mover. Inside it are memories that you don’t feel ready to touch just yet. Despite everything else scattered around your room, you pick up the box and shove it into the back corner of your closet. Maybe someday you’ll have the heart to open it again, but right now, it stays out of sight.

You were about to start opening one of the other boxes when a soft, melodic voice comes up behind you— “Hey baby.”

You turn around quickly, your heart and body naturally gravitating to the owner of the voice: Kim Woosung, your boyfriend.

“Hi,” you softly respond, heart happy upon seeing your boyfriend’s smile. He sets the take-out bags down to hug you. Woosung then gives you a long kiss on your forehead, mumbling, “I missed you.”

You don’t lift your eyes to meet his right away, but your hands reach out for his as he cradles your face. When you finally look at him, he gives you that warm smile you have always loved. With Woosung, there is peace, the kind that secures your heart. As he aligns his forehead with yours, you feel all your worries melt away. 

With Woosung, everything feels safe, so right.

“I’m sorry I’m late,” Woosung apologizes. You shake your head gently and wrap your arms around his neck.

“You’re just in time.”

#jungkook x reader #jungkook x you #jungkook scenarios #jungkook imagine #bts au #jungkook fic #bts jungkook #bts fanfiction #woosung x reader #jungkook angst #jungkook divorce au #jungkook fanfic #childhood friends #divorce au #mwillow: last to know

[zoetiger-1106]

The Chameleon is actually a really complex character and here's why.

Disclaimer: This post will contain kfp 4 spoilers as well as include info from interviews and the animation featurette and I will be analyzing the movie pretending that everything had deeper thought put into it even tho it's most likely not the case sometimes

For those who haven't seen it, have the absolute criminal offense that screwed with the story telling of this movie because it is important context.

Now that we have that whole thing out of the way, let me explain to you how the Chameleon's character is shown through more subtle things instead of just very in your face exposition/ storytelling.

1) Cammy's insecurities

The first time she was in on screen, Cammy was established as being in charge of Juniper City via commanding the local crime lords. She is hidden among them for the first part of their conversation, where she observes them badmouth her before she reveals herself, but even before the reveal, we get hints to her being there via the line "You forgot the shape-shifting sorceress part" that she throws into the conversation after the bear crime lord insulted her appearance.

Despite showing herself as in control and well put together, her need to interject hints at the fact that she does still have some underlying insecurities regarding her true form.

That insecure aspect of her character is further proven by her summoning Tai Lung first (I'll get to that later) and a statement from Viola Davis where she talked about how she did the character voice for Cammy

The underlying implication that she has internalized when masters told her she was "too small, too lowly and that kung fu wasn't [her] destiny" is proven even more when you take into consideration that she exclusively transforms into species that are larger and more physically powerful than her.

She literally says: "I grew, I excelled, and I got everything I had ever dreamed of." Everything BUT kung fu. The one thing she wanted to do from the very beginning. So, with that context, the "dream" she got fulfilled to a degree was the power. Conventional, physical power.

People have told her kung fu wasn't "her destiny" so she decided to take matters into her own hands and do what she believed to get her to where she wanted to.

To quote the Stephanie Ma Stine, the director who actually cared about her: "Because she has this anger that's been build up from always being invisible to everyone else, her transformation process actually reflects her anger."

All those years of being over looked and seen as less than had such an impact on her that it consumes ever part of her being. That lizard needs a hug and therapy, your honor.

As I said, I wanted to get into why she summoned Tai Lung first (chill I know this was not actually as thought out as I am interpreting it to be but hear me out.)

Tai Lung is everything she isn't and couldn't have been.

He is tall and conventionally powerful. Even if you knew nothing about his character, you could take a look at him and know that man is strong. On top of that, he had received formal training at a renowned school by a renowned master. Taking his kung fu first and foremost is not only the fulfillment of a wish she's had her whole life but also a power move on it's own; while not able to do kung fu Cammy still managed to beat someone who was what the schools she had gone to all those years ago would have considered the ideal student.

Also can we acknowledge how the water dragons (those are not komodo dragons idc how often it's stated) clap for her after she's done with Tai? Show of hands from all the mentally ill people who'd get their henchmen to clap for them too because they desperately need praise 🙋

Similar can be said for how she makes the people of Juniper City bow before her when she is paraded around; it makes her feel powerful.

Lastly I'd like to point out that her line of "Third rule of the streets? [...] Some would say it's the most important. Noone is interested in your feelings." Is probably something she got from people not caring about her feelings back in the day when she tried to pursue her passion.

2) Cammy's knowledge & skill

"Those bonds (the cages) are enchanted with some very old and very powerful magic. You'd need at least 10 Dragon Warrior's to get through them". Not only can she create such strong (presumably) chi based bonds but she can make them in batches and with ease. Between the scene of her accepting tributes from the crime lords of the city and Po's vision about her plan we can see her enchant multiple cages at once.

Not only that but she knows advanced chi techniques as well as how to open portals to the Spirit Realm. That is not easy information to come by Cammy has been researching chi in general for god knows how many years.

I don't know if I have said this on this blog before but her not being redeemed is such a wast because she could have not only helped Po further his mastery in chi but also aid in replacing a lot of the scrolls in the JP since she is knowledgeable on history and the history of kung fu and master too.

You honor that lizard is a nerd and deserves to geek out with Po.

I'd also like to point out that not only is she able to shape shift but do it incredibly swiftly. She can be seen switching forms in a matter of seconds even mid combat. Not only that but she has so much control off her body that she was able to create that dragon from of hers by transforming parts of her into different beings with little to no effort. That forms for incredibly stable too; she only transformed out of it to change her strategy.

Her incredible amount of control over her body funnily enough also shown by her 3d model alone. As stated by Sean Sexton the head of character animation "The Chameleon had 8130 controls. You could move every single part of that character [...]"

Lastly, I need to talk about how she genuinely is like Po.

I've seen people say that she can't do anything on her own because she just steals people's kung fu when no. No that is not the case. After having stolen enough master's kung fu to have a wide knowledge of the craft she was able to mimic and adapt to Po's style without having to steal anything from him. If she wouldn't have been given the opportunity to learn kung fu she would have become like Po and been able to master techniques based on simply observing them.

TLDR: Cammy is a great character this fandom is just horrible to female villains

#kung fu panda #kfp #the chameleon #kung fu panda 4 #live laugh love the chameleon

[bambisnc]

you got mail~!

➵ from : jung sungchan~ ♥︎ (b4 reading look here for cw/tw)

"if you went back in time today and told the 7 year old me that one day the first crush he ever had, the only crush that ever impacted him so much that if you call me cringey i will bite your fingers and spoil all the shows in your to-watch list i literally cannot imagine a life without you. your goofy kindergartener hair and your bright eyes had me captivated since day one and i swear i will do anything and everything i can to make sure that nothing ever dampens that sparkle of yours.. so if ever i act in a way that hurts you even in the slightest please, please tell me. i know i.. sometimes let my emotions get the best of me when it comes to matters regarding you.. and yes before you ask, i did go visit that “friend” of yours i accidentally got into a minor disagreement with at the new years’ celebration and you can barely even tell he had a black eye! he didn’t seem too happy to meet me though, didn’t even greet me properly at the door after i went to the pains of buying him fresh peaches and kept going on about “allergies” or something .. ..wait i got sidetracked,.. Right okay, can’t keep my feelings in check! it’s just.. i’ve waited so many years to be able to call you mine, missed out on so, so many things we could’ve done together no i’m not still upset that we weren’t each others first kiss okay i’m very much completely over that!! i can’t help but feel a little selfish about wanting to keep you to myself :( is that so bad :( i promise i won’t become one of those toxic boyfriends though and i’m pretty sure these many years of best friend-ship have probably made you more than capable of keeping me in check anyways.. not that i’d ever mind, of course~ i’ll end this by saying thank you. thank you for giving me this chance to be by your side, to be able to shower you with all the affection and care you deserve, to give you all of me, for all of eternity because i’m not letting you leave me, like ever; if you ever feel like you can’t stand me, feel free to sit down <3 happy valentine’s, pretty. do me the honor of letting me love you with all i have?" ~ the best bf ever (sungchan) (bf standing for both best friend and boyfriend obviously)

[check out my masterlist for more >.<] + [more of you got mail~!]

#you got mail~! ['24] #pic creds : @/pink-horizon !!! #order's up~! 📋⋆𐙚 #riize #riize imagines #sungchan x reader #riize angst #riize fics #sungchan imagines #sungchan fic #sungchan angst #jung sungchan #sungchan #jung sungchan x reader #riize x reader #riize fluff #riize sungchan #kpop x reader #kpop imagines #kpop

[momentsbeforemass]

Are you always this nice?

I was at the glasses place, getting my eyes checked. Talking with the tech who was running the exams, about nothing in particular.

Until she said, “Are you always this nice?” I didn’t know how to respond.

After an awkward silence, she told me about the guy before me. Who – given how he treated her and the garbage he dumped on her – was either having the worst day in his life or was just a raging jerk.

It got me to thinking. About how you and I treat other people.

About how nothing that you and I say or do to each other, no matter how small, is inconsequential. None of it is neutral.

Why? It has everything to do with this simple fact: you and I – and everyone that we have ever met or will ever meet – are made in the likeness and image of God. Every person who ever has been, whoever is, and whoever will be is God’s creation and is destined for eternity.

It’s a profound reality, one that we all too easily ignore. C.S. Lewis puts it this way,

It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest, most uninteresting person you can talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be tempted to worship, or else a horror and a corruption such as you now meet, if at all, in a nightmare.

All day long we are, in some degree helping each other to one or the other of these destinations. It is in the light of these overwhelming possibilities, it is with the awe and the circumspection proper to them, that we should conduct all of our dealings with one another, all friendships, all loves, all play, all politics.

There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal.

Which means what exactly? It means that what you and I do to other people – what we say to them, how we treat them – has an impact on them. On how they see themselves, on whether they become who God made them to be, on the character of their eternity.

It means that nothing you and I say or do to each other, no matter how small, is inconsequential or neutral.

It means that everything you and I say or do is either building them up or tearing them down. Leading them towards God or pushing them away – especially if we call ourselves Christians.

And it means that for her question, “Are you always this nice?”

There’s only one answer – I need to be.

 Today’s Readings

#Nice #Build up #God #Jesus #Catholic #Christian #Church #Tearing People Down #C.S. Lewis #Mere Mortal #No Neutrals #Pushing others away #Moments Before Mass

[cocogum]

Armand’s treatment and how it impacted his life.

(‼️ Spoilers for Wakfu Season 4 and its first four episodes ‼️)

One thing that saddened me a lot when I was watching episode 4 was how Armand revealed to Amalia that he had wished he could go on adventures with her and the brotherhood sometimes.

This surprised me at first but I soon realized that it made perfect sense.

Armand was always jealous of her but I initially thought that it was only because she had the most attention from people, even their father. But Armand is the type to keep his thoughts to himself which would explain why despite how we see him looking at Amalia with a disapproving look, we never really got to hear him express his thoughts to her. His reason for wanting to go on adventures with her is also made clear: not only does he want to explore the world because it seems like fun since his sister always felt happy because of it, but the major reason is that he wants his father to look at him just like how he looked at Amalia.

When he finally tells her all of his thoughts and what he wants, we can’t help but feel like what he wishes to have can no longer be granted. Their father died not long ago, it is now too late to do anything.

Armand could’ve spoken up during all those years Amalia went to go on adventures. He had all the time in the world because he was always beside his father at all times.

But no matter how close he was to him, Armand never had the strength to speak his thoughts just like how Amalia dared to do so. It’s ironic really, Armand had the time and the moment to tell his father everything and yet, he didn’t because he didn’t think it was in his right to speak about himself and what he wanted to try.

The years of constantly seeing how his sister was getting loved by the people, how she was being viewed and called a hero by the very same people he was working hard to protect in his own way, how their father kept praising her constantly for whatever she did, how she kept getting adoration for adventuring and risking her life to save her people, while he was instead cooped up in the kingdom learning and practicing how to become king, left him in a position where he believed Amalia always had the upper hand on anything even when he wanted to express himself.

He had learned that every time he proposed an idea or even said some of his thoughts out loud during a particular situation, he would always get shut down by either his sister or his father, sometimes even both (the time when he decided to use a barrier of vines to block Ogrest’s tears but his father told him that his attempts were just “alright” when they were actually very effective for some time, the time where he told Amalia that she can’t leave while his father is terribly sick but his father supports Amalia and encourages her to go with Yugo, the time when Armand stated that none of the rulers had come to support them but his father cuts him off by saying that the queen of Bonta at least brought Joris to them which made Armand’s words sound minuscule and not as serious as the prince intended, etc.)

Granted, sometimes he deserved it (like the time when he got slapped by Eva when he was disrespectful to Dally in the OVAs or the time he did not listen to Amalia’s warnings when she told him Nox was coming and when she tried explaining who Yugo and Adamaï were back in Season 1 but not being listened to despite having Eva to back her up) but the majority of the time, he was trying his best to please his father and barely got a good comment for it.

So it wouldn’t be far-fetched to think that Armand never spoke about what he wanted to his father because he had a strong feeling that the answer wouldn’t be a good one.

As if things couldn’t get any worse for him, when his father takes his last breath and Armand was the only one there for him, who has been by his side all this time, who has devoted his entire life to training, learn and work hard to be like his father, he had only words for Amalia.

To hear his father only speak about his youngest sister and not mention him at all, must’ve terribly broke him on the inside. Even when his father was on his deathbed, he did not address everything that Armand did for him.

And it’s sad to see this happening.

Even though his relationship with his father and sister was mostly shown in the background, it was pretty obvious that their family had some issues that no one wanted to address in the room.

I feel like, in a way, we can somehow relate to Armand.

To feel like we can’t speak our minds properly because of a sibling or a figure in our lives who has shown to be better than us, even when we do work very hard to get noticed we barely get any comments or praises of the same size as theirs, to feel like we don’t matter as much as them so we should just stop talking and let them have their spotlight at all times.

And when we finally get the chance to gain our confidence or get into a position where we don’t feel as self-conscious as we used to before, we come to find out that it’s already too late to express ourselves to the people we’ve been waiting to truly be honest to, because they’re already gone or have moved on from you.

Armand’s case is a bittersweet and albeit depressing one.

What could have been a story of adventure, even if just for one day, was never realized. What could have been an experience that could have felt like a lifetime never happened. What could have been an adventure where he finally has his fun and gains a unique brotherly sisterly duo bond in combat would never become a reality. And what could have been a special moment in his life where he gets to personally know his sister’s friends would always stay a dream.

If only he knew that even a brotherhood member, Evangelyne, has a sister, Cleophee, who had her fun in the group. And even if it was just for a few days, a few moments, Eva’s sister had cemented her place in the Brotherhood and became an official member. To think that even if he had stayed a bit in the group, he would have not just become a part of their lives, but also become a part of their brotherhood.

But despite it all, Armand kept his chin up and looked forward to the future. He did not wallow in his sadness or blame Amalia for his silence during all these years. Instead, he pulls her up and tells her to not be saddened by their father’s departure, especially in front of his tomb tree, and consoles her as they hug.

Unlike anyone else, I believe Armand was able to push his selfish thoughts away (which involved blaming his sister for everything) and instead behaved like a king, someone who, despite not gaining everything he wanted in life, kept going and faced forward for what was to come.

Even though he has not been abandoned by his family, he did feel like he might've been behind everyone else at some point in his life.

He may have not been a part of the brotherhood but he’ll always have a place in his sister’s heart after what he did for her.

And I believe that his competence and his will to protect his kingdom without leaving for adventure would make him get along greatly with a certain white dragon.

#this ‘what if’ can’t stop pulling on my heartstrings 😭😭 #i never thought i’d make an armand analysis #and yet here i am #he’s so freaking relatable that it hurts #this makes me wanna read a fic where armand actually goes on an adventure with the group because of an emergency where he had to join them #i just feel like armand would join the group for a specific mission cuz i feel like if he’ll never say he wants to go out out loud #then a mission should be able to make him go out as a ‘duty’ #wakfu sadida #sadida #wakfu sadidas #wakfu #sadidas #wakfu armand #wakfu amalia #wakfu amalia sheran sharm #amalia sheran sharm #ankama #krosmoz #wakfu season 4 #wakfu s4 #wakfu season 4 spoilers #wakfu s4 spoilers #wakfu s4 ep4 spoilers #wakfu season 4 episode 4 spoilers #wakfu s4 ep4 #wakfu season 4 episode 4 #wakfu analysis #wakfu analyses #wakfu armand sheran sharm

[veganagenda]

it really is wild to me the extent with which people can just... not care. and some people 'don't care' so much that they convince themselves it's the default state of being.

I asked my brother if he'd consider switching to nonplastic sponges to reduce microplastic water flow, and he sarcastically dismissed me. later I found his general trash bag entirely full of completely recyclable material - along with the bag I told him I used to collect plastics that you can only recycle at supermarkets. he'd thrown it away without asking me.

I've been well aware that many aspects of recycling were designed to be inefficient and place responsibility on consumers for some time now. it's a devastatingly clever piece of coorperate, industrial blame-shifting. still, I wanted to believe that even if someone wasn't ready to commit to reducing their impact as much as possible, recycling and reducing plastic use was at least something we had all agreed to do as the absolute bare minimum. my brother's lifestyle proves me wrong.

even if the entire amount of materials I recycled in a lifetime hardly even made a dent in reducing pollution or wasted resource, the fact of the matter is, I do not like putting things in the trash when I can imagine what it'll be like when they get to the landfill, and how many thousands of years it might take for them to degrade. it makes me deeply, viscerally uncomfortable. I can feel in my blood and bones how much it makes the Earth beneath and surrounding the landfill hurt, too.

sometimes it's not even so much about the impact. it's about just that -- how it makes me feel. it's about the questions it makes me ask myself - am I living to my truest values? do my actions reflect them? am I truly embodying my passion for sustainability and fundamental respect to the Earth? is it worth inconveniencing myself for that? and, most importantly - just because I cannot always see the effects of my actions, just because they are immeasurable - does that truly mean they don't matter?

my brother seems to be very convinced that his individual actions have little impact. but I insist that it is a mark of great and unique privilege to not be required to witness the repercussions of individual actions - to not have to see the victims firsthand. to not be the fish choking on microplastics, the suffocating plantlife crushed beneath the landfill, the impoverished neighbourhood or the fragile ecosystem of life forced to live beside it. to be in a socio-economic and geographical position to even be capable of living a life of such supposed ignorant bliss.

it's my opinion that it's the result of an incredibly dissociative, vain, irresponsibly individualist and uniquely contemporary mindset that so many people do.

#environmentalism #environmental activism #climate change #anticapitalism #anti consumerism #plastic #vegan #veganism

[bulkhummus]

some opinions on the latest arc and episode 230

While there are some things I enjoyed about this new episode and arc, it felt rushed. I hate to be critical of a show I love, but we all know the level of work they're able to produce, and the hype around this arc felt like it deserved more than the effort it seemed to receive. I of course thoroughly enjoyed a bit of background on Carlos (and some of the fun stuff the episode did) but getting over the shock value of this information left me feeling conflicted. I think what it comes down to is two things. The arc was rushed, and the things that have just have naturally progressed did not.

They didn't give any of the hard hitting moments enough planning/time/space to have the impact they could have had. We did not see any of the build up of Carlos becoming fed up with Janet and the University. All of a sudden he was. We did not have time to feel conflicted about Carlos leaving town for an unknown reason. All of a sudden he did (and returned mid episode). Cecil's town, the very thing he exists for, is literally nearly gone and he doesn't give us an ounce of poetry or prose to describe how he's feeling? On his radio show? We're just told that it is. This episode in particular just felt like people talking at me instead of telling me a story. The only moment that I felt held any weight, that moved me as a piece of writing, was the moment the child of the glow cloud outwardly processed their grief that their parent would not be returning and implications about predecessors taking on the role/title of those that died which is very interesting (for Carlos, for Cecil, as a concept in general). I, quite frankly, don't care about what they THINK science and life is. Show me through actions they take that demonstrates it. Show me through action and progression.

It has never been more apparent to me than this episode that they write episode by episode instead of considering the full scope of an arc and what it means for their characters. If you are going to adapt the structure of your show to write a mini arc, you can't approach it the same way. And they KNOW this. Writing episode to episode is a delight when its new stories and one offs and bits and pieces. Writing an arc implies some sort of episode to episode progression of a building plot. They've done it before, beautifully even (Of Love and Horror, Egemony, A Matter of Blood, the Lee Marvin episodes to name just a few) and yet this arc was disjointed and felt flat. I've read their books. I've read other things they've written. They're capable of adapting stories into a more "linear" plot with an unreliable narrator. The writers just didn't give it the time and space needed to develop a story that felt natural.

Which leads me to my next point. Natural progression. I've said before I have never once looked to Night Vale for any sort of continuity (it's a show that defies it which I LOVE) but there is a difference between continuity and being sloppy. It doesn't work when half of your arc seems to be you trying to figure out what the hell you're trying to say. A lot of the major points in this latest episode were directly contradictory. We were introduced with the idea that Carlos was sort of afraid of Janet and by her being there. All of a sudden, with no moment that tips him over the edge shown, he stands up to her because he was arrested? We were introduced to the idea that Carlos was deemed a failure by the university, and yet the scientists were quick to leave Lubelle's side in the end. The town was showing clear disdain for him, and not one character stepped up to offer some delicious conflict and tell Carlos it'd be better if he left? To his face? I don't even want to delve into the handling of Blakes character, because quite frankly, he did nothing for the plot because he was tossed back and forth between writers to do what they wanted him to do in that episode (is he against janet, with her? does he hate Carlos? like Carlos? which is it? its not unreliable narration) The arc was framed by Carlos' time spent at the University, about him becoming a Night Vale citizen in his literal anniversary speech about living ten years in Night Vale, and yet, there was no satisfying exploration (I'm not even asking for direct REASONS) as to why he might have left, why he never went back, or any of his involvement there. Saying it was all about love just... Isn't enough for me. Not when Carlos hasn't interacted with his town to demonstrate that life he's built, or how much its hurting him that they're rejecting him again. Not an ounce of how this has effect he and Cecil's relationship (again, Cecil is a chronic over sharer).

It slowly became less about delving into Carlos as a character and his relationship to this town, and processing perhaps grief from the DOW, and more about the shock value of losing beloved characters with no satisfying consequence or action. And then there was little things, specifically in this episode 230. If Janet announces something and it's framed in a way that it should upset Cecil (her telling him about the DOW) then he should have some sort of response to it. Even one line. Nothing. On HIS radio show. Not even a pause where it's made known that he HEARD her.

The whole arc just felt like it was trying to do much and gave itself a time restraint. They are the writers AND producers. No one is forcing them to stay within an episode limit. Especially not when it was hindering their ability to tell a good story.

And I think that's the kicker for me. It didn't feel like an episode of Night Vale. Sure they've played with format before, but this episode (230) didn't even remember that the show is built around Cecil telling stories. Even the episodes that have played with format/structure in the past have involved Cecil telling a story. Through his perspective. Voice appearances always offered some sort of relief to his bias as an unreliable narrator. There are so many interesting ways to incorporate voices instead of just some weird back and forth between two characters. Frame it as an on air interview where Cecil can't get a word in. Frame it as angry voicemails. Have Carlos tell us he's leaving via voice memo, and Cecil dealing with that ON AIR. Stop explaining what is happening and SHOW Us. You expect me to believe, a show that is so heavily influenced by its narrator time and time again, that Cecil was not angry? Was not heart broken? Was not begging Carlos for answers about anything at all? Annoying need to know everything anxiety riddled Cecil Palmer?

They're good writers. And I don't expect every episode to be like, life changing, but again, with an arc that was so heavily anticipated by everyone for so many years, it feels like a disservice to create a story that feels so thoroughly at odds with itself in tone and direction. I hate to sound so critical because I LOVE Night Vale with my whole heart, you guys know I do, but I can be critical of it when it's merited too. And I will continue loving it despite being critical, but I just wished the writers would slow down and maybe, I don't know, read some of their old episodes. And who knows! Maybe it's not over. Lubelle is not confirmed dead, Carlos having an interest in the DOW still is concerning, his parent was mentioned as some point of interest etc etc etc. Like there's a lot they can still do with it, but they just have to, you know, do it.

#sorry if this got a little rambly its real late by me #I just was really hoping they weren't going to rush the ending of this #and it felt like it WAS and ending #even if it wasnt #I just love Carlos so much #wtnv #welcome to night vale #wtnv spoilers

[yanderes-stuff]

Yandere Johnathan Ohnn x reader 

3k words

(credits to my friend Spooky aka ghosttown) 

At first… Things seemed so pleasant, and healthy.

You met Johnathan at college, it was a biology class you both required. He seemed rather charming in an awkward way. Always rather jumpy and hunched over in his own world. You couldn't help but admire him from afar at first; sometimes he'd notice and avoid eye contact as soon as his eyes met yours. 

Then your professor decided to put you in a group for a project. You exchanged numbers and ended up doing the projects together instead of as a group… They didn't want to bother with it, which was something Johnathan said he's used to by now. But he had to admit, he felt a lot more at ease working with you.

Over time you got to know more about each other, which was pleasant when you were both starting to feel burnt out from classes.

When break rolled around you ended up unwinding at his dorm, his room was covered in those science posters only dorks decorated with. It was a bit cute how passionate he was about science, he'd ramble to you while you sat and nodded. Barely understand anything he's saying. 

You didn't even realize you were starting to lean on each other for support. However, with college stress, it was clear he wanted somebody he could spend time with outside of classes. You gladly obliged, wanting the same.

There were places like the theater, the aquarium, and libraries where you two just enjoyed each other's presence. At this point, you started to suspect maybe you loved Johnathan as more than a friend.

You kept those feelings to yourself until there was a note slipped under your dorm room.

 My dearest Y/N,

I hope this letter finds you well. As a college student, I often feel awkward and uncertain in social situations, but you make me feel a sense of calm and comfort that is unlike anything else. From the moment I first saw you, I knew that you were special, and I have been drawn to you ever since.

I remember the time we spent together in Biology, and I felt like I was in a dream. Your laughter and smile light up the entire room, and I can't help but feel mesmerized by your presence. Your voice is like music to my ears, and your personality is so unique and special.

I know that I may come across as awkward and shy at times, but you bring out the best in me. I feel like I can be myself around you without fear of judgment or rejection. You make me feel accepted and loved in ways that nobody else ever has, and I am grateful for every moment that we spend together.

As a college student, life can often feel overwhelming and confusing, but you make it all seem worth it. You give me the strength and motivation to keep pushing forward, even on the toughest days. You are my source of inspiration and my reason for living.

I know that our time together may be short-lived, as college tends to be a transitional period in our lives. But I want you to know that you have made a lasting impact on me, and I will never forget the way you made me feel.

I hope that we can continue to spend time together, and maybe even build something more meaningful out of our friendship. No matter what the future holds, I want you to know that I will always cherish the memories and experiences we shared, and I will always have a special place in my heart for you.

So will you date me?

With love and affection,

~ Johnathan Ohnn

You were surprised reading it, using notes to ask seemed a little… unique but oddly fitting for him. You grabbed your phone, your heartbeat quickening. You told him about the letter and that you accepted his offer.

Ohnn, sat at his desk, messy papers laid about as he smiled at his phone, laying it on his chest as he stared at the wall. He never felt love until now, of course, he had little crushes here and there but never an actual chance at something genuine.

He started daydreaming about you, sweet little thoughts. Giving you flowers, eating lunch in the cafeteria together. Maybe you'd like it if he made you lunch? The gears in his mind began to turn, he was never good with romance. But he knew that people usually appreciated small acts of kindness; he wanted to show you his sweeter side. Something he's been longing to show somebody for years. 

His mind decided and he made your favorite and packed it in a brown paper bag. Nothing too fancy but he hoped you'd appreciate it, He stored it somewhere safe before he decided to get some rest.

He stretched while standing, yawning as he slowly crawled into bed, he took his medication. His bed was a mess of sheets and blankets, but he tried to wrap himself comfortably while his mind wandered to his potential lover. 

Tossing and turning. His eyes were heavy, his mind would soon let him sleep. Thus began a long night of his imagination,  His romantic fantasies only brought him comfort from his otherwise paranoid mind. 

The morning came and sunlight peeked through his windows, For once he felt energized. It was Saturday thankfully, he messaged you asking if you'd like to go to a science museum. And of course, you said yes.

After getting dressed you met at the location he provided you, to him you looked so beautiful. Your eyes were soft and your lips looked just as delicate, you admired the museum in front of you. 

Your eyes followed his hand as he stretched his lanky hand out for you to hold. His hand enclosed yours entirely, and he stood tall over you; Smiling as he walked into the building.

Johnathan spoke up first "I've been here before, I-I think you'll like it. All the fossils here are so fascinating."

You looked at his gaze, his expression was that of joy. A man exploring his passion. "You seem very knowledgeable on these things, it's cute y'know"

He blushed a deep crimson, twirling his hair with his other hand nervously. "T-thank you! Nobody's ever called me that before…" 

It was the truth, all his colleagues found him to be strange. His awkward mannerisms were more unsettling to them, but you found them endearing. 

You began to walk towards a large fossil, it was a brontosaurus.

You stared in awe, it was about twenty-eight feet tall, and it took up the entire room. He shoved his hands in his pockets and looked up at the fossil. There was a plaque that read.

One of the most famous and complete skeletons of a brontosaurus was uncovered in the late 19th century and is now on display at the American Museum of Natural History in New York. The brontosaurus is an important and iconic species that has been represented in popular culture, including the classic children's book "The Land Before Time" and the Jurassic Park films.

You took his arm and held it against your body gently. Eyeing other fossils in the room, you guided him towards whatever caught your attention; there was a variety of fossils. Sea creatures, land creatures, impression fossils, trace fossils, and replacement fossils.

The museum was very large as you both explored the building, it was a very clean place with bright white lighting on the high ceilings. Jonathan held your hand tightly as you weaved through people, it was almost like he was afraid to lose you. 

He led you to the museum café, pulling a wooden chair for you at a lonesome round table. He took off his gray backpack, zipped it open, and took out two brown bags. He smiled warmly at you. “I thought that maybe you’d like to have something homemade… I-I made your favorite food, the café menu looked quite expensive… I hope you don’t mind.” He stammered as he blushed, he knew that you both were on a college budget. But he recognized his cooking skills, which his mom taught him since he was a kid; and he used it to his advantage– in truth, it was a passion, a nice coping for the stress of college, he enjoyed his dishes greatly and this was the first time he got to share.

You looked surprised “Oh! You didn’t have to do that Johnathan… Thank Your cheeks turned red as you looked in the bag, gently grabbing the food from within.

His eyes watched you take the first bite and your eyes widened. It tasted amazing, like a comforting meal made with delight. You could feel a rush of serotonin through your mind. 

You swallowed and smiled, “I haven’t had a homemade meal in a long time, this tastes much better than what I’m used to.” You smiled and enjoyed the lingering flavor on your tastebuds. Then you realized he was staring at you, he had a look of fondness on his face. But… there was something off about it, you just brushed it off and paid no mind to it. 

The two of you ate your food together while speaking of your passions and memories, you learned a bit about him in that time. You learned that he had a very small friend group due to his social awkwardness, he barely even spent time with his friends so he didn’t mind. 

You finished your lunches, you disposed of his trash for him. The both of you chatted as you exited the building, he radiated with elation as he spoke about his scientific passions on your way back to campus- It was simply adorable.

Now you wished you didn't fall for his intelligence.

Stepping foot into his familiar dorm, you sat on his bed and relaxed. He followed and placed himself next to you, turning on the TV in front of the bed. He grabbed your waist gently and kissed your hair.

He avoided eye contact "wou-would you like to cuddle with me?" the hand on your side rubbed you soothingly.

"I wouldn't mind~" you said back, kissing his cheek to reassure him you wanted his affection. He laid down and held your body against his, he rubbed your hair before returning his attention to the television. 

It quickly became late. You could barely move from his body intertwining with yours; he was very clingy. But maybe that's because he's still new to relationships. 

He kissed your neck as both his hands were on your stomach, he took off his glasses and for the first time, you saw how sunken his eyes were. They had dark purple circles underneath as well, like he hadn't slept in days.

He dipped his head lower so his head was snuggled against your nape. He sighed and smiled. "Pleeeeease stay the night, I'd love to cuddle with you longer…" 

You paused, leaving him tense before nodding. You felt his legs wrap around yours even more as he pulled you closer in. Peppering your neck and shoulders with kisses as a reward for your compliance.

His body felt so… warm, it was hard not to fall into a cozy sleep. And his rhythmic breathing felt so soothing, you quickly fell into his trance.

He didn't even need his medication that night, for once he was okay with being awake. Feeling you unconsciously nuzzle into him; for once he felt loved.

He wasn't going to let that feeling go.

Johnathan tilted his head, looming over you almost threateningly. "What's so special about him that makes you love him more than me…?" 

You felt so small under his gaze. He looked hurt but angry at the same time. "I told you before, he's just a friend, please let me have friends…" 

You felt pathetic begging him, but this was becoming a problem. He wouldn't let you live in peace, anytime you talked to anybody be it a boy or girl he felt threatened. And he made that known to you.

Your circle was slowly becoming smaller and smaller thanks to Johnathan constantly guilt-tripping you (and some other measures he took.)

Johnathan gripped your arm, it was tight, pleading but not tight enough to hurt.

"I'm sorry honey, I-I just want you to be safe. What if they take you from me? I don't know what I would do if I couldn't have you." 

He wiped away the tears you didn't realize fell, stroking your cheek as his gaze softened. "I feel more comfortable when you're with me, this is for your safety. You'll see." 

He kissed your temple, his grip unwavering. 

"I know you feel lonely, but you have me, you'll always have me. Isn't th- that enough? I don't need friends, but I need you."

You didn't know what to say, your mind was still spinning a cohesive response. It was hard not to panic, Johnathan was bigger than you, he may not be strong but he was definitely smarter than you. He made it clear that if you tried to leave, he'd find a way to bring you back.

He rubbed your cheek again. "Even if you're not used to having nobody, I'll make it okay, I'm doing this for us." 

It seemed like he was trying to soothe his paranoia as equally as he tried to soothe your suffering. He pulled you in a hug as you choked back sobs, remembering the distant memories of your friends. His hands crept through your hair as his breathing became more labored like he was trying to keep an anxiety attack from happening.

"You're all mine now, can you tell me you're mine?"

He spoke so gently, like he was trying to comfort you still by asking you to give into his insanity.

You looked at him, you saw through his glass lenses a look of genuine love and obsession, he genuinely thought this was what was best for you…

He was shoved away, his look twisting into one of surprise and confusion. "Johnathan, I can't do this, you can't just take my social life away from me! You need mental help…"

His posture faltered for a moment before shifting. He gave you a melancholy look, a tear dropping from his eye. He took a deep breath and sighed.

"I don't need mental help, I just need you. Please, you're the only one who ever cared for me. Don't you love me? There are horrible people out there. I'd know, I've experienced it. Is it so bad I don't want you to risk that?" 

You felt a pang of guilt, his intentions were good but he was showing it in all the wrong ways.

"I love you Johnathan but maybe we should have a break…" 

Maybe this would help him collect himself, and have him have enough time to reflect on why this was all wrong.

His face went pale and his calming smile twitched into a look of nervousness, his chest heaved even greater.

"No, no no NO! Breaks lead to breakups. I can make you happy, I can keep you safe! I'd do anything you ask-"

"Then let's have a break." 

You tried to stand straight and look stern even if your nerves showed through, he seemed to be heaving now. Like he couldn't breathe. 

He grabbed something you couldn't see off the kitchen table and stepped towards you and kicked the back of your legs, your body making an impact with the floorboards. Your head hurt, but he instantly saw his chance and straddled you. 

"I-I've been keeping you safe, what else could you want? I spent so much time protecting you, providing for you, loving you. And I'm not letting you go, I'm not letting you leave because you're too irrational to realize this is my way of love."

You couldn't move your arms, you struggled to try to free yourself. This only seemed to make him more upset as he shifted to keep you in place.

"I don't want to do this, but I'm not afraid to." 

He spoke in a tone you never heard before, he was calmly threatening you now. Taking a knife and showing you it's glint. It had… blood on it?

"I had to hurt people to make you mine, I admit it. And if you don't want anybody else getting hurt then you'll stay, right?" 

His chest was still heaving but he returned back to his calm, almost smug expression.

You nodded, you didn't know what he could mean by 'hurt' but you didn't want to risk him killing somebody out of lovesick insanity.

"I'll stay, I'll stay, I'll stay just… stop it stop it… stop" you repeat yourself, squirming absentmindedly. His smile returned again. 

"That's more like it, I wish I didn't have to show you this side of me. But if it keeps you with me I reckon it's only necessary for us. The sooner you accept my kind of love, the better."

He smiled a sickeningly sweet smile, watching your face look at him with fear. As he let your wrist go.

"Don't be afraid my love, everything will be okay." 

His grin only widened at your vulnerable position.

"You're all mine now~" 

He put the knife on the ground and chuckled with a layer of insanity present. He rubbed your arms affectionately.

At least nobody would be harmed now...

#x reader #yandere #yandere fic #johnathan ohnn x reader #spot x reader #johnathan ohnn #spider man: across the spider verse #the spot #spot #Yandere johnathan ohnn #Yandere spot #yandere art #art #send asks #send me anons #send me dms #yancore #manipulation

[absolutelyhugh3s]

jersey giant | jh86

y’all i am so so sorry this took so long to get out!! i’ll try my best to start getting things out quicker and more often!!

but we’re back with the song blurbs!! i’ve recently been obsessed with jersey giant by elle king and for some reason it makes me think of the devils

pairing -> graves!sister!oc x jack hughes warnings -> mentions of blood, mentions of injury, slight cursing, mentions of death not my gif!!

word count -> 2.12k

7 months ago

since i was a little girl, I believed everything happens for a reason.

no matter how hard i search, there was no reason for this.

i remember that day like no other. i sat in the living room of my hoboken apartment, which i shared with my older brother, of course.

today my anxiety had been like no other. with ryan at hockey practice, i feared something happened to him. i texted him an upwards of 30 times, to be graced with a response of “dw cupcake i’m doing fine :)”

however, that did not calm my rambunctious mind. so i turned to my music. i’ve been writing music since i was in high school, not for the people, just for me. music was my escape, an outlet for me to express my emotions.

i don’t remember much from those few hours, the only thing i remember was my raw and bleeding fingertips after playing for so long.

it was about 3 o’clock when the front door opened. “i’m home cupcake!” ryan called, though it wasn’t his usual tone. it seemed gloomy and sad.

my brother seemed to drag himself into our shared living room, shoulders hunched, a solemn look on his face.

“how was practice?” i ask cheerfully, trying to lighten his mood. “i’m so sorry darcie” ryan croaks out, tears pooling in his eyes.

“for what ry? what’s the matter?” i ask, cupping his face and wiping the few tears that had fallen.

“they’re trading me.”

his words cut me like a freshly sharpened knife. he opens his mouth to speak once again and i brace for the impact.

“to pittsburgh”

the knife was twisted. for the past two years, i was blessed to call the garden state my home, and blessed to call the devils my family.

i was struggling with my schooling a lot a few years ago, trying to cope with the loss of my brother at home. so my parents thought it would be a good idea to send me to live with him.

so to new jersey he went, with me in toe.

i’ve made great friends while being here, johnny, dawson, nico, jesper, timo, they were all such great company.

but no one’s company could compare to that of the devils prodigy, jack hughes.

being very close in age, we became best friends immediately. we spent almost every day together except when he had morning skate or roadies.

jack was my person. at first i thought it was just platonically, but after a few months of our friendship, i developed feelings.

and after a hard loss, denying them a spot in the 2022 stanley cup playoffs, i discovered he reciprocated those same feelings.

so we started dating in secret. it wasn’t easy, but we made it work. and about 6 months in, we told our siblings. 

luke was accidentally first to know, after an awkward walk in that lacked clothes. quinn followed soon after, because jack felt guilty that the younger hughes knew but not the older hughes.

ryan was the last to know. it took a while for him to warm up to our relationship, but he eventually came around. plus, the boys became even closer than they already were. everything was perfect, until it wasn’t.

“so what does this mean” i ask, looking down at the dried blood on my fingers, my voice cracking as i try to conceal my true feelings.

“we have to leave jersey. and move to pittsburgh” he said, clearly just upset as i was. “trust me darcie i don’t want to leave” he sighs

“so don’t!” i exclaim jumping up from my place on the couch. ryan looks up at me with tears in his eyes. “darcie you know it’s not possible. if it was i wouldn’t be leaving”

“but ryan my whole life is here” i cry “my friends are here, my job is here, for fucks sake my boyfriend is here!” tears begin to stream down my face. “i cant just uproot my life because you got traded!” 

“darcie lynn graves you know we have no choice.” he says sternly. brushing his long hair out of his eyes. “better get packing” he says, looking around at the decor. “our flight leaves tomorrow night.” and with that, he walked through the apartment to his bedroom.

just as i’m about to pick up the phone and call jack, there’s a knock on the door. i look out the peephole to see non other than my boyfriend, with tear stained cheeks on the other side.

i immediately open the door to see jack still in his practice clothes. “nico was the first player to know. he told the rest of us and i came as soon as i could” his voice cracks.

i wrap my arms around his shoulders while his encircle my waist. “i don’t want you to leave me” he mumbles, placing his head in the crook of my neck. “i have no choice baby” i sigh “this is the absolute last thing i want to do”

“how long do i have?” he asks me, tears falling down his cheeks. “what?” i ask, caught off guard by the question. “until you have to leave. how long”

“my flight leaves tomorrow night” i brush the strands of his messy hair out of his face.

it looked as though that statement broke his heart. it’s scary, being young and in love, not knowing if this could possibly be the last time they ever meet face to face.

“then let’s make these next 24 hours, the best we possibly can” he says feigning confidence.

we did everything together for the next 24 hours, just as he had promised. we had the time of our lives. we went skating together, a late night 7/11 run, movies, the whole nines.

all knowing it could possibly be the last time.

then came the part i dreaded the most, leaving. ryan insisted on taking my ginormous suitcase, as jack and i walked through the airport hand in hand.

we stopped before we got to tsa. i bit my bottom lip, knowing this is what had to happen. knowing that i was leaving and he wasn’t coming with me.

jack turns to me with a sad smile on his face. “i’m gonna miss you so much baby” he says, trying to hold back tears as well.

“i’m gonna miss you too jacky” i said, my tears finally falling. he wipes them away, the sad smile remaining on his face. “i love you to the moon and saturn” he says cupping my face in his hands.

“i love you forever and always” i smile “no matter how far away i am” jack dips his head down placing a passionate and loving kiss on my lips. “dars let’s go!” ryan calls out.

“promise me you’ll call me if you need anything ok?” a big goofy smile appears on the brunette boys face. “only if you promise me the same” we laugh and share our last goodbyes as ryan and i headed towards tsa.

present time

i left jersey almost seven months ago now, but i miss jack like crazy. being without him has been really tough for me, and everyone can tell. however, i was able to spend a few weeks with him over the summer at his lake house. i met trevor, alex, cole, and ellen and jim officially, and i loved every second of it

believe it or not i’ve made some great friends in pittsburgh. if you told twelve year old me that i was friends with sidney crosby she would laugh at you and tell you you’re crazy.

“whatcha doing kid?” sid asks as he sits next to me on the couch. ryan had invited the guys and their partners to our house for a team get together. he says it’s to “celebrate the start of the new season” but i think it’s to get on their good sides.

i point to the large flat screen tv currently playing the devils game against the st. louis blues. “ohh i see” sidney chuckles “ditching the boys to watch the boyfriend”

i laugh “don’t get too pissy sid” “no no i see where i lie on your rankings of favorites” he jokes, taking a sip of his beer.

“jack hughes goes down and he’s hurt!” the broadcaster says. sid and i freeze.

“no no no”

“cmon kid get up”

“god jack get up!”

“cmon kid cmon!”

we begin to panic, yelling everything we can at the tv, as though it could be heard all the way in st. louis.

i try to hold back my tears, as i pick up my phone. as my shaky hands attempted to open my phone, jacks contact photo appears.

i look to the tv to see he’s already in the locker room. “hello?” i ask, voice shaky and palms sweaty. “hello is this darcie graves?” the man asks, clearly not jack.

“yes how can i help you?” i ask “im michael coyne, the head physical therapist for the new jersey devils. now, i’m not sure if your aware but jack sustained a significant injury to his shoulder tonight, and he keeps asking for you. and if possible we would fly you into jersey and we can meet you there. now he has informed us of your current situation, we will cover all fees needed, we just want to make sure he is ok.”

“absolutely, um- i- yeah i’ll- i’ll go” i stutter. “perfect. the flight leaves in an hour, is that alright?” he asks. “yeah that’s perfect” i sadly smile. 

“any questions?” he asks sincerely. “yes there is. can i talk to jack?” micheal almost cuts me off, “absolutely here he is now” 

“hello?” i hear my boyfriend hiss in pain. “hi jacky. i’m coming ok? they’re flying you home and i’ll meet you there. it takes to hours to get there babe, but i’ll make it to the airport in about an hour or so” i ramble.

“ok.” he hisses again “i never expected you to come back” he says. i can tell he’s frustrated by the situation, he hates being away from hockey.

“i’ll come back if you just call” i say sweetly “now i have to get packing and head down to the airport. i’ll call you as soon as i can alright?” i begin to throw my clothes into my suitcase.

“ok i love you”

“i love you more jack, i’ll be there soon.”

3.5 hours later

i landed in newark just before jack and the trainers did. although it was around 10 pm the city was still alive. so to take my mind off of the stress, i walked to the prudential center. once i arrived the trainers were already there and assessing jack.

as soon as i walked through the doors i was met by devils personnel, who ushered me into the training room. 

it was there that i saw jack sitting near a pt table with ice wrapped around his shoulder.

“you gave me the worst scare of my life” i said making my presence known to the older boy. “oh thank god your here” jack goes to get up “god fucking damn it” he hisses, sitting back in the chair.

i run to his side “can i get you anything? water, ice, a heating pad? i can order chipotle if you want? have you eaten? oh god your probably starving” i ramble.

“hey, i’m alright darcie. i’m not going anywhere” he says cupping my jaw with his healthy hand. “but what if you weren’t? something serious could have happened, you could’ve gotten a concussion, snapped your neck, jack rowden you could’ve died!”

he doesn’t respond, only chuckling under his breath at my rambling. “stop looking at me like that! it’s not funny! this is serious!” i giggle, trying my best to stay mad at him. i failed miserably.

“come sit” jack says, patting the seat next to him. as i sit down he places his good arm around my shoulders, carefully pulling me into his chest. “thank you for being here. it means a lot to me” jack says, placing a kiss on my temple.

“i’ll always be here for you baby” i smile up at him. he leans down and places a slow and sweet kiss on my lips. 

i plan to stay in newark for the next few weeks, since luke and jack have an extra room in their house. “are you gonna play doctor?” jack asks as i help him into the car. “i guess so yeah” i giggle.

“can you wear one of those sexy nurse costumes?”

“jack rowden hughes!”

#jack hughes x y/n #jack hughes imagine #jack hughes #new jersey devils

[mynonclicheblog]

One final Never Have I Ever love triangle thematic analysis

I've said this in one of my posts before, but the narrative is always going to favor what is best for Devi. A lot of what makes this show so juicy to dive into is because so much of its meaning is rooted in symbolism and higher concepts, not just the individual interactions you're looking at onscreen!

I think that's what doesn't work for some (not all) pro-Dxton anti-Ben folks. They see Paxton being respectful and kind to Devi, they see that he's the attractive object of her desire from day 1, and they see that the two of them genuinely do help each other in certain ways. But when these same people look at Benvi, they only see Ben making obnoxious comments to Devi (+ others), they see childish behavior and mistakes being made, and they see them frequently butting heads due to their shared competitive nature.

And honestly? I get it. These conclusions are easy to come to when you're looking at the surface, but they don't take into account the full story that's being told.

Let's get into it. 😎👇

So I mentioned earlier the idea of what is best for Devi. Not what is best for any regular person out there -- what is best for Devi Vishwakumar! Our girl expresses in no uncertain terms that she enjoys her hypercompetitive rivalry-turned-bond with Ben ("Ben's smart and we talk- mostly argue- for hours!" // "I don't want to break up with Ben. He really pushes me.") The fact that they fight and compete is not a detriment to their compatibility, it is actually the thing that makes him most desirable in her mind. She would not have wanted to be with him in the first place if this were not true. Their sharp-tongued communication style may not be the standard picture of a 'healthy' relationship for most people, but, well. Devi and Ben are far from most people.

Devi is an incredibly emotional, dynamic person who's always searching for another high. The competitive nature of her relationship with Ben is enough to satisfy her itch for novelty/excitement (her differences with Paxton don't hit this box), yet Ben's presence also provides a comforting long-term consistency in her life. He's seen the very best and the very worst of her and he always comes back. He frequently brings Devi back to herself, too, when she loses sight of what matters (friendships, family, sense of self, her goals, etc).

Then there's the dream vs. reality dichotomy that very much applies to this love triangle. Simple as it may be, it's accurate. I believe it was built that way on purpose because of how well it reflects Devi's relationships to Mohan and Nalini, which is the beating heart of what NHIE is all about. One (Mo/Pax) is more outwardly palatable than the other and provides an easygoing, self-soothing escapism that she needs in order to work through her grief. This person represents youth and the rose-colored past; Devi's tendency to idealize and indulge. The other person (Nal/Ben) is sharper around the edges, a bit harder to swallow, but pushes Devi to do better and supplies the support she needs. This person represents Devi's grounded reality; her time in the present and the woman she is growing into.

They are both important pieces of Devi's journey, but the themes of past vs. present speak for themselves. The past is something we keep in our heart; in this case, it's someone who has impacted us and we'll always carry with us -- but the ultimate goal is to move forward from that. The central relationship of Never Have I Ever is that of Devi & Nalini as they heal and grow together. In terms of Devi's romantic life (which is what this analysis is about), her relationship with Ben is the one that more closely shadows the series arc between her & Nalini.

I'd like to address some things by the individual season now. One of my observations watching s1 for the first time was that Paxton was usually aligned with bad things in Devi's life, whereas Ben was aligned with the good. ie, Paxton was the root cause of Devi's falling out with Elfab and Nalini // Ben is the one who repaired those relationships. These things aren't Paxton's fault, nor do I place any blame on him. They're just subtle narrative choices that send up unspoken flags saying, hey look, this isn't the right person for her. This theme remained in s1 for the most part, but given that it was NHIE's debut season, it planted several seeds for me about who the boys were for Devi and how they fit into her world.

Season 2 does a lot to sort out the difference in what Devi thinks she wants (Paxton) and what her heart truly wants (Ben). Yes, I'm going there, too: head vs heart. Devi's underlying preference for Ben > Paxton should be easy to spot as early as 2x01 -- if only for the fact that Devi finally bagged the hot guy of her dreams, yet, choosing to be with him isn't easy for her. In fact, as both Devi and Eleanor confirm later, she wanted to choose Ben in the first place. Like... that's crazy when you think about it!!! Despite all the pieces falling into place for her and Paxton, and against her friends' shallow advice, she decides that she won't let go of Ben. Instead, she makes the misguided decision to date both. This isn't the kind of mistake she'll ever make again. It isn't Devi acting out because of Ben -- it signals a profound attachment to him when, all things considered, picking Paxton should have been a no brainer. That revealed everything I needed to know in order to understand that being with Paxton wasn't what she wanted in her heart of hearts.

Then, of course, 3x10 brings that all home with the stomach knots comparison. It tells us that since Devi and Paxton have moved into a place of friendship, with him no longer on a pedestal, those romantic feelings (particularly on her part) have dissipated. As a bonus, Devi even explicitly states that Paxton was a dream! Ben, however -- her flawed reality -- is the one who still gives her butterflies. This is the result of Devi's slow awakening to her true inner self, the Devi who values realness and authenticity and loving through imperfection. It's a step closer to the complete acceptance of herself. (Notice as well that right after this point, it becomes more undeniable than ever that Ben is who she wants to be with.)

As long as Paxton was a romantic possibility for Devi, their relationship was tied to her feelings of insecurity and inferiority. Again this is not Paxton's fault -- he assures her of the opposite all the time -- but this is Devi's story, and we are shown over and over that Devi fears true vulnerability with Paxton (both sexually and emotionally). Compare this to the way she has always felt confident, seen, driven, and unabashedly herself in her relationship with Ben, even when they were enemies. At a glance Devi may appear to act more immature in Ben's orbit, but the truth is that she grows with him more than anyone else (besides Nalini) thanks to Ben's penchant for encouraging accountability and showing her that actions can have consequences.

Anyway, TLDR version:

Paxton = Devi's youth, Mohan, grief, distraction, the past, idealism, and the head (constructed ideas).

Ben = Devi's future, Nalini, healing, confrontation, the present, reality, and the heart (authentic truths).

Never Have I Ever's romantic story structure rests on the premise of these symbolic definitions. They are gospel, and while the characters will grow and change and become better versions of themselves, they will do so within the lines that are already drawn. The lines exist for a reason -- they are a narrative tool! These characters cannot and should not 'grow out' of their roles because those roles are their identities within the show's framework. Character development isn't getting wasted, because the characters are exactly who they are meant to be right through to the end. They are symbols. If that's not your cup of tea then so be it! But there's nothing wrong with this writing style. In fact it's one of my personal favorites because everything is so neatly defined, yet fascinating to read into 🥰

The imperfect Ben had to be Devi's true love because her love interests are, in a way, reflections of herself. By no fault of his own, Devi always felt the need to be "perfect" for Paxton because that's how she viewed him; a false paragon of everything she wanted to be. That is the point of their story together. Her acceptance of the deep love she has for Ben (and Nalini!), despite his sometimes off-putting demeanor, is aligned with Devi's acceptance of her own imperfections -- that she is hot-headed, she can be self-absorbed, she makes mistakes -- but that she is also brilliant and driven and caring and radiant, and she is equally worthy of receiving the love that she has to offer others.

Narratively speaking, it was never truly a competition.

#never have i ever #benvi #devi vishwakumar #ben gross #ben x devi #devi x ben #bevi #nhie spoilers #nhie #analysis post #*success

[stoopid-turtle]

the art of being a skeptical turtle

So this is a personal post more about my experience as a turtle. If you just want to get to the fun list of candies I totally buy into regardless of evidence, just skip down to where the asterisks are. (Consider this like a recipe attached to a blog post)

For those interested in the whole nerdery going on here, let me share that I had a lot of trouble coming to terms with bjyxszd. I wrote a whole series of posts about it to get my thoughts in order. Now I'm fully on the turtle train, but I find myself skeptical of some candies.

This is gonna get super-nerdy so hold on to your butts.

I'm a generally skeptical person. I come by it honestly. My parents literally subscribed to Skeptical Inquirer and Skeptics magazines. They (well, my dad mainly) were capital-S Skeptics. My family talked about logical fallacies, perceptual oddness, and the fallibility of memory over the dinner table.

Please don't back away. I know self-identified Skeptics are typically insufferable. I didn't know this as a kiddo, though, so the whole "thinking about things skeptically" became just my default way of processing stuff. Nowadays, I wouldn't call myself a Skeptic in the way that some in a particularly obnoxious subculture do. But I do tend to be a skeptical sort. I just don't...you know...think it makes me smarter/better/cooler than other folks.

(Actually, it makes me way less cool bc I can single-handedly ruin a fun party by expressing skepticism about something. Nobody likes a wet blanket. I know this)

My bestie in high school always called me Scully to his Mulder. He would believe anything he saw or read, whereas I didn't. Usually, I was right. Like when he totally thought that the Blair Witch Project was real found footage (It's not. Nobody thinks it is now, I know, but it was part of the promo at the time). On occasion, he was right. Like when he told me that some gray clouds we had overheard were from wildfires in Mexico. I scoffed bc, really, we weren't that close to Mexico. But he was right and I learned a valuable lesson on large-scale weather phenomenon. (He's still wrong about there being a picture of a light bulb in the pyramids though)

So, yeah, that's just how I process things. It's second-nature for me. But I reached a point with my generally skeptical outlook where I considered 2 things to see whether I really cared if people were buying into something I thought was false.

The stakes. If a person believes X, what does that lead to? If I don't believe Y, even though it's true, what does that lead to?

There's a whole bunch of political stuff that heightens the stakes. To take a ridiculous (and outdated one), when I was growing up, there was a common story that AIDS hopped from apes to humans because a gay man had sex with an ape and then had sex with other humans. Thus, the AIDS epidemic.

The stakes of other people buying into that homophobic nonsense were (and are) life and death. (If you believe that...uh...bye?) It's something that's worth me being the obnoxious Scully if I hear someone buying into it.

The stakes of, say, my high school bestie believing that The Blair Witch Project was real found footage was...nothing. It just made him want to see the movie more. Nobody was hurt. It didn't matter.

I argued with him at the time, but I probably wouldn't anymore.

The stakes for believing that bjyxszd, here in international fandom, are perhaps higher than the Blair Witch thing. But only barely. If somebody believes in a particular rumor/candy that I don't think is real, it affects literally nothing. We're both still turtles. We have a lot more in common than we do difference with regards to YiZhan. Likewise, the effect of me not believing a candy that may be true is nil. Gg and dd are not impacted in any way.

(I think things may be different for c-fans, but that's not at all a thing I'm qualified to delve into. I can only account for myself in my context)

2. The other thing I consider is the context. That is, how likely are we to know the actual truth?

Scientific claims have a method to test them (and claims that can't be tested are just...not something science addresses). Claims about current events can be researched using journalism methods or whatever. For that homophobic AIDS story, there's ways to prove that it's not true. For the Blair Witch thing...well, the actors went on the talk show circuit for promo so, you know, the real footage myth was quickly lifted.

Celebrities exist in a different context. Like most people, they have a private life that is not accessible to people on the outside. If they choose to open up about that life, then cool. But if they don't or can't do so (like is the case with YiZhan), then they'll try to keep their private life out of sight of fans.

It really hit home to me when I was doing the bts thing how little of dd and gg we saw in the Untamed bts. We see even less of them now. I'm at peace with the fact that I just will never know much about these guys (I wrote a whole post about it). But the fact that there's a big mass of the unknown means that the possibilities are endless. We don't know and we'll never know.

So I don't have any more authority on anything gg or dd related than anybody else does. So why would I attempt to question or dismiss candies that other people find compelling? At the end of the day, there is a truth, but it's not accessible to us, so anything we come up with is just extrapolation.

Which is fine. It's fun. I think there's real stuff going on. (If I didn't, I wouldn't be here) But it means there's no real point arguing about the specific candies.

(and to be clear, I don't see turtles doing this, really. so this is all just me reiterating my own approach to things bc I'm a person who processes thoughts through long tumblr posts apparently) (and it's not a reaction to any particular candy. this post has been in my drafts for ages)

I think I'm a hard sell on a lot of candies, and I'm definitely the fuddy-duddy who just squints and asks a bunch of obnoxious questions about things.

But I ask those questions of myself and don't feel the need to annoy other turtles with them because, honestly, we're all in this boat together. Some candies appeal to particular turtles more than others, and I think we all kinda have our personal preferences for which ones resonate with us. I'm not here to rain on anybody's parade, especially as we all have way more in common just bc we all believe in bjyxszd.

This is all a long-winded way to explain how I think about candies, honestly. Or more, how I assess candies that are new-to-me and figure out whether to buy into it or not. With anything involving bjyx, I also leave a lot of room for there just being an unknown and unknowable. Again, the stakes are low, and if I'm wrong about any particular candy (in either direction), then...oh well? It affects literally nothing.

************************************************************************************************************************************************

So here's the fun part! The list of candies that I fully admit don't have a whole lot going for them (by my stupidly exacting standards) but that I totally buy into just because I like them.

Basically all lip-readings, but especially this one

(if you don't want to click thru, this is the moment from the Nanjing farewell concert where dd and gg seem to flirt about photos while on-stage)

Okay, I know, rationally, that lip-readings are always gonna be shaky. I mean, I've seen Medieval Land Fun-Time World. If I'm honest with myself, I know that the lip-readings are basically fluffy candy.

But whatever. I choose to believe them. This moment, especially, I adore (and it does come with dd posting a bare-faced photo after!). I think their big grins while openly flirting with each other on stage just jazzes me enough to pretend.

It's all true. I totally believe it.

Related to this is:

2. Any and all CPN about dd and/or gg seeing turtle signs and smiling or otherwise reacting positively.

I've seen such CSI-worthy analysis of sight-lines to try to establish with precision where dd or gg is looking at the moment they smile/look happy. I have no idea how much any of it holds up, and it's not worth the bother to try to confirm any of it.

But whatever. I like it. I believe it. I'll probably believe it everytime it happens.

3. Advanced Bombology.

So there's some things that aren't in dispute here. We definitely know that gg suddenly cut an Olay commercial ad from a 2 day shoot to a 1 day shoot, and it's a reasonable assumption that he did so to be at the DDU anniversary episode with GG.

The rest is a little fuzzy. The video details dd being kinda grouchy in interviews before the DDU shoot, and it also shares an anon rumor from a person who claimed to overhear dd in a studio restroom arguing on the phone with gg. This rumor came out a year after the event.

The rest of the video is some interpretation of the boys' behavior/mood in the DDU anniversary ep.

So, like, I get that anon rumors a year on maybe aren't the most solid evidence for anything. But whatever, I buy it.

And the interpretation of the boys' mood seems true to me, especially the moment where the interviewer asks gg if they'd discussed his visit ahead of time. Gg def does a sweatdrop, panic pause, look at dd moment and waits for dd's lead to answer. I find a lot of mood interpretation from videos a bit much, but this feels real.

In fact, the whole thing just feels real. Maybe that's why it's easy for me to buy. It feels like a real argument a couple would have.

4. The 5/22 fight during CQL shooting.

I talked about this back when I was doing the bts in order.

In tl;dr, dd gives gg a bit of a brush-off response to something. gg responds by cold shouldering him and then doing some passive aggressive sniping about how dd doesn't want gg to care about him. dd gets upset, then he apologizes, then they go on to watch something on one of their phones.

The basis of this one is some gossip plus a video shot from a distance that requires reading lips. So we know that's already fuzzy, and I know I approached this with some skepticism in my earlier post. That was just to be rational about things so as to be honest with myself.

In truth, I buy it. I buy the argument. I buy the lip-reading. Again, it feels real.

5. GG's card to turtles

This is one of those frustrating ones I'm having trouble refinding. Darn.

The upshot, and I'm going from memory, is that there's a CPN about a card written to turtles ostensibly from gg. This came with some handwriting comparison to try to match the signature to gg's known signature.

This isn't something I'd place bets on, because...seriously, it's so fuzzy.

But in my heart, I believe it for no reason other than that I want to.

6. DD as gg's mystery driver

Okay, there's a couple such incidents. One quite recently. Where gg's driver is mysteriously masked such that you can't see their face.

And, truth, it could be literally anybody under there. But for me, it's dd. No need to give me painstaking comparisons of hands or whatever. I'm fully in on this one.

7. The bone necklace.

Ack, don't hate me for this one!

When I was doing my posts about stuff that had convinced me that gg and dd were still together, I stumbled with the bone necklace. To me, it's the main thing that convinces me, but if I'm honest, it really is kinda a leap of faith thing.

With the ox-head necklace, we have the fancam footage to back it up as being from gg. All we have for the bone necklace is the timing and the precedent of dd having already worn a necklace from gg. That's shaky, really.

In fact, I think I saw some other dd CP claiming the bone necklace as theirs (I saw them also claiming the Leica camera). I think they're wrong, but I don't have any solid proof to say so.

I think the most I can say is that there are much harder evidences that gg and dd are still together. But these typically involve massive privacy violations so I'm not eager to spread them around (I kinda hate that I stumble upon them, tbh). But in any case, it has me convinced, so if I already know gg and dd are a couple, then of course the bone necklace is related.

But on its own, the bone necklace is a leap.

Okay, that all said, since I (finally) had a photo of dd last time I posted, I'm dropping a random gg photo here. Not my favorite, cause pls don't make me choose, but one that hangs out my head throughout the days.

#bjyx #yizhan #considerations of being a turtle #it starts nerdy and then turns into a listicle #no judgment for just skipping to the candies #gratuitous gg photo #they srsly just wrapped him in cables and then that happened #what is his waist yall #and why's there a car driving up his lapel? #still sexy

[osamusriceballs]

The Accident - Part VI

Atsumu x fem Reader

Warnings: None

Words: ~ 1,1 k

About: The flashback ends- but what will you do next?

Part I II -> Next Part

"You're not getting married."

Osamu's sharp remark did not have the intended effect. Both of you were still clinging to each other, acting all lovey-dovey.

"Samuu, you don't understand. She's my soulmate. I love her." Osamu's eyes almost popped out of their sockets while he kept watching how you two clung to each other and smiled like idiots, your hand on his cheek after he had said these words.

"You don't even know her. And stop touching her like that in public."

Atsumu's hands started wandering on your back, his fingertips teasing the bare skin on your back much to your delight - but to Osamu's horror.

"I don't mind - but who are you?" You turned towards him, and he paused for a second. You were beautiful, that much was certain. Shiny eyes, glossy lips, and a dress that looked like it had been made for you - but he quickly discarded every thought about your looks when he knew that he needed to stop this nonsense.

"I'm Osamu Miya. His brother."

"Oh." Your eyes widened as you took in his appearance, probably only then realizing how similar he looked to the man whose lap you were currently sitting on.

"Samu, we gotta go. The barkeeper told us that there's a priest next to this club."

"You're not getting married."

No matter how many times he repeated the sentence, it seemed like Atsumu was unable to understand.

xxxxxx

"And then you convinced me to get your car to drive us home. Wouldn't stop bickerin' about how it's expensive and designer and about how it costs more than Onigiri Miya will ever make. I'll definitely kick your ass for that."

A muscle under Osamu's eye twitches when he mentions the comment, and you have to hold back a snort at this. He's kind of cute when he's angry.

"And then?"

"You were gone. Found ya at the church, but it was too late. You idiots already signed the contract."

You slowly step back until your knees reach the bed, and you heavily sink down on it. It feels like he's telling you a story right out of a movie, not something that has happened just a few hours ago, the whole thing still too absurd and unreal.

"Can we redeem it?" You look at Osamu, like he's the only one that can save you now, and he somehow actually is. You still have hope that you can get out of this without negatively impacting the rest of your life.

"I've talked to our lawyer. It's a waterproof contract. Very surprising because the church was more than just a bit shady. You're both bound for a year until ya can file for divorce." His words feel like a death sentence, and you find yourself at a loss for words. You gulp at his words, blinking a few times to suppress your tears. You're an idiot—an idiot for getting in a situation like this.

It's silent.

You don't dare to look at either of them, your gaze only focused on the phone in your hands, and every passing second makes you feel even more uncomfortable, until you can't stand the silence anymore.

"I'll get going."

You stiffly get on your feet, your movements robotic and lifeless while you make an attempt to leave, but you're quick to get stopped by Atsumu before you can even make more than getting up. "Wait- I- I don't even have yer number!"

"Oh." You pause, standing there for a few moments while you watch Atsumu getting closer to you, until there is not much space left between the two of you when he stands right in front of you. "Hey- are you okay?" Concern laces his voice while he looks down at you, and you manage to nod with a forced smile. "Peachy."

Osamu snorts at your comment and shakes his head, a movement that you barely see in the corner of your eyes. He probably feels guilty for the whole situation too, the dark cicles under his eyes similar to Atsumu's, certainly because he tried to find a solution for this and did not sleep at all during the night. "People who say 'peachy' are anything but fine."

"Hey, look at me." Atsumu ignores his brother's comment and brings his hand to your cheek. You're startled but allow him to turn your face upwards until your eyes lock. "I'm not letting ya go when ya can't even walk properly. You'll eat something, then you'll take a nice hot shower and get in some clean clothes and then I'll bring ya home. That alright with you?" There is something about the way he softly states the words that sends a comforting wave of warmth through your body, and you find yourself nodding and trusting him.

"Hmm. Good girl. Now just eat the rest of the fries while Samu gets ya some clothes. Right, Samu?" Atsumu breaks the eye contact with you to look sharply at Osamu, who only sighs and nods. "I saw a souvenir shop at the lobby. Better than nothin'." You now look at Atsumu's side-profile, admiring his sharp jaw line, unable to do something else but wondering if there is even one bad angle on this perfect man, while Osamu leaves the room with another deep sigh.

"Shouldn't I have given him some money?" You take a deep breath and wipe your hands on your dress, noticing how clammy they got. Probably a side-effect of the nervousness.

Atsumu snorts and returns his gaze to you, an amused smile on his lips. "That serves him right. He always brags about how much he makes with his stupid restaurant." Atsumu looks so similar to Osamu when he rolls his eyes; it's almost comical. "Don't tell him I said that, but he really makes the best food ever. I'll take ya there and show you."

You hum approvingly, feeling somewhat a tingle run down your spine at the prospect of him taking you out for dinner but try to ignore it. "C'mon. Eat the rest of the fries. I saw how ya inhaled them. You can have mine too." He grins, something that makes him seem absolutely adorable, and you find yourself smiling back at him, a warm feeling running through your body.

"I'm not hungry anymore. I'll take a shower then?" You questioningly raise your brows, and he nods. "Yeah, of course. When Samu comes back, I'll put the clothes in front of the bathroom."

Thank you," you raise your hand as if to pat his shoulder, but you halt the movement just before reaching him. You shouldn't touch him. Technically, you don't even know him. His gaze flickers to your hand, and he appears to consider taking it. However, he quickly steps to the side, giving you some space to move to the bathroom.

Without looking back at him, you close the bathroom door, take a deep breath, and glance at the phone in your hand. You scroll until you find the picture of a bright-haired person—

and decide to finally make a call.

#haikyuu fanfiction #haikyuu x reader #atsumu #atsumu x reader #atsumu fluff #Well! #I already had the draft like three years ago #and I changed a few things #but I feel like this is going smoothly so far #I'll not set up a schedule for this because Uni sometimes keeps getting in the way #but I'll do my best to post as fast as I can rest assured #I'm very invested rn tbh xD #but I caught a cold #I'll probably stay home for the next few days T.T #STAY SAFE EVERYONE! and healthy and hydrated <3 #Love ya! <3 #btw #I created a new header #I really like it somehow #I hope you like it too! #I'll keep this one for the rest of the series <3

[csilis]

Five nights at Freddy’s William Afton x F!Reader

A/N: The movie got me back to my FNaF era, so I thought I write a oneshot with my favourite guy.

Note: William gets springtrapped. What a surprise indeed.

Your mother would be disgusted if she would see you now. Marrying the insane serial killer who ended your own sister’s life. But just like Cassidy, you were onto vengeance too. And to avenge the sister you have lost, you were willing to do anything. Even if it meant sacrificing your beliefs and becoming a monster just like the one before your very eyes.

So in the abandoned backroom of the Freddy Fazebear’s pizza you stood, holding his hands and waiting for an uncertain future to come.

“We are gathered here today in this beautiful place to witness the joining of two lives” came the prerecorded voice of a priest from the tape player which stood on the chair between you and him.

“Beautiful place? What a joke” you thought as your eyes were focused on the black-white floor tiles. He did just rid himself from the last of the old animatronics whose parts were splattered all over the floor. But it mattered not to him, he simply ignored all the destruction he brought upon himself and all the souls he enraged.

You weren’t paying any attention as the feeling of your revenge being so close started to consume every part of your whole being. You wanted it so bad, couldn’t wait to finally do it. But unlike him you had self control. You knew you had to wait for the perfect moment to get through with your plan. Or else you fail, becoming a ghost of the past just like your sister.

“You may kiss the bride” this was when you came back to your senses. It was time. Finally.

You then let go of his hands and swept the tape player from the chair with one swift move. You then stepped on it to be closer in height to this bastard. To clearly see the pain in his eyes as you take your revenge.

He was in that damned bunny suit just like you asked.

“The children will fear you this way. You will be invincible” you whispered into his ears this morning as you two were laying in the bed. Sweet lies. That’s what they were.

What pulled you back was his wet lips on yours as his hands roughly grabbed your waist. It was time…

Some part of the suit was exposed, showing how old that thing actually was. You knew that the springs were the only thing keeping him from being smashed. But it was about time to be changed. You knew from him that those springs were delicate and easily triggerable. That’s why you were standing in the middle of the mouldy backroom. You could see the wetness forming on those exposed wires and springs as you carefully wriggled out the knife which you sew into your bridal dress while he was out, destroying the animatronics.

In the meantime you tried to keep the act of the woman madly in love with him. You let his hands grab your breasts as he moved onto your neck to put kisses on. Your stomach churned in disgust. You wanted to vomit. But once you freed the knife, you felt finally relieved.

You gripped the knife tighter and stabbed him in the side. Your sudden act made him stumble a few steps backwards as his mouth was wide open. But he didn’t even had a chance to mutter a word out as the springlocks immediately snapped from the impact of the knife.

His blood spilled onto your white dress as he tried to scream but couldn’t as the metal stabbed through his lungs. You could only hear him drowning in his own blood as you stepped down from the chair with a mad grin on your face. As he knelt down because of the immense pain, you had time to notice the ghosts who seemed to be the only witnesses of your cursed wedding. The few moments of eye contact you shared told them everything they needed to know. It told your sister everything she needed to know.

Then you looked back at him. Anger radiated from him, your betrayal carving into his soul for forever. You knew he will come back. He always comes back. But until that day, you will thrive in the pain you caused him.

While picking up the headpiece of the suit next to your right foot you knew what you had to do. You walked towards him, lifting the headpiece higher.

“Until death do us part, William Afton!” you angrily yelled, pushing what you were holding into his head and hearing the springlocks inside that also snap.

It was what he deserved. It was all he will deserve. Endless pain and torture.

Word count: 781 Characters: 4188

It now has a continuation called Back to me.

#fnaf #william afton #x reader #five nights at freddy's #fnaf x reader #fnaf x y/n #william afton x reader #william afton x you #wedding #fnaf cassidy #springtrap #springtrapped #The_Revenge_Saga