#harvard hottie angst

[royalwriteroftheuniverse]

Thanks Captain America.... part 1

Part 2 here

Warning tons of angst. Not my best work. But I just got done reading a fic that made me hate Steve. Therefore right now there's angst. 18+ mentions of kidnappin and cheating and crying and waning Steve to fall on a knife and I think thats it 18+ just incase. Comments welcome please I need more comments. Reblogs appreciated no reposting or republishing.

This is part 1

Part 2 here

I saw Steve at the street fair. I thought he was working and I know he said we can't be seen in public together but I can still say hi like a fan or just be around him. Feel his warmth I love that.

There was a small group wanting to say hi and I was just there to watch him. Just as our eyes meet I hear a

"Stevie baby" and a woman kisses his cheek. And she had a promise wring on her ring finger a claddah.

I couldn't read his face but I know he could read mine as I gasped. That was the reason that was the real reason. Tears pooled

I wanted to puke.

I started crying and went to some place to sit. My hand was shaking as I took out my phone and I sent him one. Last. Text.

"The only reason that I am not dousing you with water is because I'll be made the villain. Your things will be in a garbage bag in the lobby. I suggest you get it before its thrown out forever tomorrow morning. But maybe those things you said meant something meant nothing.. I know I meant nothing to you."

I couldn't care less if someone got his things i assume they'd be thrown out regardless. It's obvious he didn't care about me he knew I was crying and he just didn't care.

I ignored every ring and ding and notification from my phone. I never read any of his responses or voice mails. I never blocked him either it seemed cruelest for him that way. I thought maybe one day I'd be strong enough to read him begging. But I guess that day will never come.

Where I was sitting someone came up to me,

"Hey are you ok."

"No I just found out my boyfriend was cheating me probably the whole time. He's not the man I thought he was... he was never."

"You found out here?"

Yea he said he didn't want us-" I stopped myself i wasnt about to let myself be kidnapped or killed because someone thought I meant something to Steve. "Us to come because he had work. It's complicated."

"Its not that complicated. He's an asshole."

"That about sums it up."

A few weeks later my front door is being pounded on.

I look for the peephole and its Steve. I should have known.

"I can see your feet and hear your breathing i know you're there."

"I'm not going anywhere with you."

"Someone knows about us they're threatening you you need to come-"

"No.

"This isn't a-:

"I'm not going anywhere".

:It's just to the tower. I'll break thi-"

I opened the door a bit and he shut up..I made sure he could clearly see my face my face my eyes still puffy from crying.

"I don't care I don't care about anything anymore I don't know why you do either because I meant nothing."

"If something happens to you I'd-"

"Wouldn't care you'd just feel guilty in front of the press to get sympathy you're nothing like you claim. Get. Out. Of . My. Building before I call the cops. Or better yet tmz. All righteous captain America is harassing me stalking me. Forcing-How do you think that would play out? Hm? There are camera in the hallway."

"I never meant to hurt you. I never meant for it to get this far."

"But you meant it to grt far enough.. but you were cheating on me. Or was I the other girl? Or were we both equals in this and you just went back and forth. Did you tell her?"

All my questions went unanswered

I. HATE. YOU." Then I slammed the door. And walked back into my bedroom.

"Honey next time he's here-"

"Dont you'll make things worse. He'll just freak.. I can't believe you never saw Old Yeller its the saddest movie ever. After this we're watching winnie the pooh." I snuggled back in Hayden.

"What if he's telling the truth?"

"Hes not all he does is lie. Should be his moto."

There was this huge women defense class series Maria Hill and Natasha from Shield/avengers were doing. A series of class 16 weeks. I was able to get a spot thatks to the one woman who knew I was Steve's girl-or I guess one of Steve's girl. I always wondered why her face looked a bit sad. Now I know.. I figured why not especially since Steve won't leave me alone and as much as Hayden cares he'd never be a match. I don't want him to get hurt. He's becoming more than just my best friend.

I had been kicking and punching the bags so vioenty one class. I even kicked a hole on one if the bags.

Steve would have loved that.

"You dont have to easy on those things you know they can take a beating." Natasha had jokes

"My ex won't leave me alone"

"Report his ass."

"I can't he's too....connected it wouldn't go anywhere." I shook my head. If she only knew

He doesn't understand he cheated on me and he just wants me to."

I couldn't stop the tears in my eyes.

"We could always stick Cap on him." Hill joked.

If she only knew.

"I wish you could. I wish Captain America could kill him." That's be a fight id like to see him falling on a knife.

"He's that bad?"

"Worse." I started crying and whiping my eyes. Stupid I shouldn't have said anything.

"Steve come here." I hearnaNat yell

Shit.

"I have to go."

"Wait." They called after me but I never ran so fast out of the opposite side of the gym and ann the way to the outside and down the street where I just had to catch my breath and cry.

"Are you going to say something or just stand there."

"I never meant to-to hurt you."

I looked up at him with an incredulous look.

"Steve you stayed over at my apparment constantly. You told me you loved me. You'd say how amazing I was how beautiful how much you cared. When I saw you there with whoever it broke you really broke me. And yea im stupid im an idiot for letting a man do thst to me but I trusted you. And then you come up with some fake stalking shit."

"It wasn't fake. it isn't. For what it's worth I never meant to hurt you."

"Its not worth shit."

"But id you don't believe mnaNat will tell you-"

"I was juseiwith her and Hill"

"They don't know you they only know I assigned people to-"

"To what" i asked through gritted teeth.

"To keep you safe, alive."

"Look just please come back with me."

"No. And tell Nat and Hill I quit. I can't go back knowing that you'll know I'm there."

I got up and walked away From him from what I swore would be the last time.

But I should've gone. I should've just gone. Because now I'm in a cell that I'd never get out of in a place I dont know with people of all diffrent backgrounds speaking diffrent languages none that I know of. Sometimes I think of Hayden I hope he's ok. That he wasn't hurt. I know he'd look for me but never find me.I've was an actual friend.

I don't know how long they'd hold me or what they'd use me for or do to me. All because I said yes to dating Steve Rogers. If he had agents on me they'd know where I was or he'll they would have stopped it but just like, you know I don't know how many times he lied. But that was just one more time. Because of him, because of Steve Rogers I'll never be saved.. because of Steve Rodgers I'll never get out if here alive. So Thanks Captain America for how my life turned out.

Next chapter here

Taglist

@nana1000night @sapphire-rogers @hawkeyes-queen @patzammit @sparklybarbarianninja @cadencejames87 (one time tag you know why lol)

#avengers #chris evans #steve rogers #ari levinson imagine #ari levinson x female reader #chris evans x plus size reader #ransom drysdale #steve rogers fanfiction #chris evans characters #chris evans comfort #angstober #steve rogers angst #chris evans angst #steve rogers imagine #steve rogers x reader #hayden #harvard hottie

[royalsweetteaa]

His sunflower

Pairing: Stepbrother!Bryce Langley x reader

18+ ONLY | MINORS DNI

WARNING - This following fic contains: explicit smut, stepcest, dom/sub dynamic, angst, fluff, possessive!Bryce, jealousy, Hayden (Harvard hottie) makes an appearance, brief Hayden x reader, penetrative/unprotected sex, heartbreak, degradation, pet names (baby, sunny, sunflower).

Summary: After a long lasting scandalous ‘friends with benefits’ relationship with your stepbrother Bryce, you decide it’s best to put it to an end, especially now that you have another guy on your love radar.

It’s been one year since your mother married Mr. Langley, Bryce & Maya’s father and you became a part of the family. It’s also been 7 months since you first did the most disgraceful thing, which was to hook up with Bryce, your stepbrother.

Since then, you have barely resisted each other with Bryce always being determined to feast on you whenever he got the chance, - another addiction a part from his drugs.

Since then, you have barely resisted each other with Bryce always being determined to feast on you whenever he got the chance, - another addiction a part from his drugs.

He would always seek you, and a few times you would seek him for some relief. College had been piling up work, and you were having a hard time keeping up with the amount of stress you easily built. It didn’t help that Bryce was so experienced at sex, and so you invited him in every time he approached you for a session.

The only thing that would leave you with the feeling of regret was when you remembered what you are for each other. In front of your parents, Bryce acted like the perfect stepbrother, - a guardian, promising your mother to protect you.

“Don’t worry, Mrs L/N. I’ll look after your daughter like she’s my own flesh and blood.” Bryce had once promised her. What your mother didn’t - and still doesn’t know was how he went beyond offering protection, and was practically the danger itself, - a very lustful danger.

Bryce used you like a piece of meat after he had learned just how kinky you really are. He took it to his advantage of using your holes, having you blow him whenever he asked and fuck you stupid, knowing you loved it as much as he did.

He would wake you up at 4 AM, just so he could have a taste of you before your parents woke up for their morning business. Sometimes when you were in the barn, Bryce would ‘coincidentally’ be there too to feed the horses hay, and when the time was right, he would take you in an empty enclosure and empty his load on you. He didn’t leave you unsatisfied once.

It led you to present day, and like any other ordinary day, you studied in your room for an upcoming exam. What wasn’t as ordinary was how you were actually in a good mood while doing your exercises, as something different had entered your life, - something good.

Your thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door, and you knew based on the pattern of which they knocked that it could only be one person.

“Hey, sunny…” Bryce greeted you as he entered your room quietly. You looked up from your book and gave him a smile of acknowledgment. “Maya’s out of the house and my dad took your mother out for dinner tonight. It’s just us…and you know what that means…” he said, his voice low and loaded with the intention of seducing you.

You groaned as you rested your head on the pillow. “I’m studying, and I’m actually focused. Use your hand or something if you’re horny.”

“My fleshlight ain’t doing the job. It’s gotta be you, sunny. Suck my dick for tonight.” He requested as he crawled onto your bed, wanting to get close to you. He climbed on top of your body, your eyes leaving the page you were on as you saw the man was now hovering above you while giving your sides strokes. You started to giggle when he started to lightly tickle you, and you pushed his arm away.

“Bryce, stop iiiit!” You humorously pleaded in the midst of your laughter.

“C’mon, give me something, sunflower…” he whispered huskily as he tickled your lower waist, making you laugh even more. He took your vulnerability to his advantage and flipped you over with your back now facing him, and he rested himself on top. “Mmmh, sunny…” Bryce moaned against your skin as he subtly began to hump against you, grinding his crotch against your ass.

“Bryce, stop being such a horndog.” You adjured as you were loosing focus of your studying. Bryce had it easy to make you hot and bothered, but just this once you were trying to maintain control.

“I can’t help myself, not when you’re laying in bed like this. You’re practically inviting me in..”

“Bryce, we can’t…” you whined, as you wriggled out of his touch. “We need to stop seeing each other. This isn’t right…”

Bryce grumbled as he got off and laid beside you instead. “Why do you say that?”

You rolled your eyes, expecting him to be aware of the elephant in the room. “Isn’t that obvious? You’re my stepbrother.”

“So? Who gives a fuck? It’s not like we’re related. Nobody would care if they knew we fuck to blow off steam.” Bryce claimed, stating it as factual, but you weren’t so sure about that.

“Yes, they totally would. It would be an absolute scandal.” You said, already feeling nervous as you imagined the possible reactions if anyone were to find out. Your mother would kill Bryce. “Anyway, I’m going on a date tomorrow and I would like to be a little loyal to the guy, so we will have to drop the sex.”

Bryce’s head snapped up, the lighten candle of his arousal being blown out as soon as he heard what was news to him. “You’re going on a date?”

You grinned at the thought alone, “Yes, I am. Met this guy the other day by the park and he asked if we could see each other again. My love life has been so dry these past years, - I can’t miss this opportunity. He seems so sweet too, I’m so excited.” You chirped the end of your sentence with enthusiasm.

Silence settled once you closed your mouth again, making you wonder what was up with Bryce as you looked to the side where he was laying.

He was pursing his lips, irritation read all over him no matter how much he tried to hide it. Before you could ask him why he was pulling a sour face, he rose up from your bed and let out a disappointed sigh, letting out a mocking laughter right after.

“Fine, whatever. Didn’t take you for a whore but if you want to chase after other dick, that’s none of my business.” Bryce blatantly said with raised arms, as if it would defend his harsh words.

You saw red when Bryce had called you the derogatory word, making you wonder how he had the audacity to say that when he had his name running around as a grade A fuckboy.

“I’m not a whore! You are!” You shouted back for his ears to hear, and he confirmed he had heard from the audible scoff he let out by the other end of your door.

You laid on your stomach again with a huff, continuing reading from where you left off.

The next day…

Your date with Hayden went as perfectly as it could ever go. He had invited you downtown at the popular Italian restaurant, and you ate delicious food while having conversation after conversation, lasting 2 hours after eating your food.

You had to order drinks to make it worthwhile for your stay, and afterwards you walked out to take a nice walk together around town.

“I had fun tonight. What do you say we go to that aquarium you mentioned? I think that would make an awesome second date.” Hayden suggested, earning a smile from you. You were hopeful this was the beginning of a lovely romance.

“That sounds wonderful. I’d love to.” You responded with glee.

Hayden was less crude and in so many ways more romantic than any partner you have previously had. He was attractive and attentive to your care, being a gentleman of opening the door for you and asking for your opinion of how the date should go. He listened to you talk, admitting himself that he could hear your stories for hours without getting bored.

He was perfect for you.

One date would turn into five in the course of 3 weeks, and you were growing expectant of Hayden asking you to be his girlfriend any day now.

In the course of these dates, Bryce grew distant, only interacting with you when the family was getting together. Even Maya had expressed concern over Bryce’s lack of communication, and even though you had a suspicion over the reasoning, you hoped you would naturally get along again like how you did before you started your ‘friends with benefits’ relationship.

When you returned home from your 5th date, the house was quiet as your parents had left for a trip which would last a few days, giving you, Maya and Bryce the mansion for yourselves. Maya was at Finn’s for the night, and you knew her well enough that she wouldn’t return until early tomorrow morning. The younger sibling had found someone too, and you were only thrilled on her behalf.

That left you to wonder where the older sibling could be on this Friday afternoon, but your question was about to be answered when you opened the front door. You were met by Bryce in the entrance of the hallway, all dressed up in his nightwear and ready to go to bed. He was looking expectant at you but it was all a facade to hide his jealousy.

“How’d the date go with wonderboy?” Bryce asked with a forced smile. He had nicknamed Hayden that after constantly hearing you telling your mother how wonderful Hayden was, and Bryce didn’t have enough respect for him to be calling him by his actual name.

“It was magical, as always, but I’m not going to tell you any more than that because I’m still mad at you.” You huffed as you passed by him. “I’m still waiting for you to apologize for calling me a whore.”

Bryce laughed, shaking his head as he wasn’t taking you seriously. “You are one, though, - which leaves me to wonder….how do you think he would react if I told him we used to fuck, hm?”

That had made you stop your steps as your stomach dropped at the thought. You turned to glare at him. “Bryce, you wouldn’t dare…”

He shrugged, neither denying nor confirming it.

“I just think it’s rude you know. I stopped sleeping around when I had you. I thought we had something exclusive, and you threw it away like it was nothing.” He said as he stepped towards you.

You looked at him confused. Were you missing something? Why was he talking as if you had been a couple? “What we had could never stay exclusive,…what did you expect of us to be? To continue having a friends with benefits relationship until we grow old? Keep us a dirty little secret until our parents die? I want a boyfriend, Bryce. A family some day too. I’m past wanting to stay single and I don’t want to play any more games.” You said with a cold tone as you were making your way up to your bedroom.

“I’m not playing any games either. I stopped playing around the day we hooked up!” Bryce claimed as he followed you to the second floor.

“I don’t believe you. It’s always been just sex! You only sought me out for that reason.” You reasoned.

“That’s your perception of it, but I grew attached each time we spent together intimately. Do you really think I would initiate full convos with you if I only wanted to get my dick wet? Do you think I give aftercare to anyone I sleep with?” Bryce asked with his hands on his hips, his eyebrows furrowing from genuinely being curious to know if you thought of him like that.

“Maybe…” you mumbled, unsure. “ - I wouldn’t know! You never confessed this to me before I got with Hayden. I’m not going to turn away from him now when things are going so well. I don’t know what else to say. I’m sorry, Bryce…we would be too complex anyway..it’s best if we lay whatever feelings we had to rest and find other people….for both of our sakes..” you said, your voice sympathetic as you felt kind of bad for the guy standing in front of you.

A torturing silence filled the hallway, and you were longing for Bryce’s response so you could finally part ways and go to sleep peacefully. He was staring at you, and his eyes met the ground after.

You wanted to find closure, and you hoped with what you had said, Bryce would be convinced to leave your intimate past behind.

Bryce wetted his lips and took a last glance at you, looking up and down your form to take in your prepped up appearance.

“….I like your dress. Sundresses always suit you.” He quietly complimented with a half smile as he walked past you on his way to his own room.

Your mouth was left open, but no words came out. You were stunned.

Ogden was right. Bryce was so unpredictable at times, you thought. That last interaction of the night would leave you pondering throughout your sleep.

The day after, you received a test message from Hayden during one of your classes.

Hayden

Hey, could we meet at the park 03:00 PM? There’s something I’d like to talk about.

You smiled as you typed your reply with excitement.

Y/N (me)

Sure! ♥️ I’ll see you there then.

This must be it, you thought. Hayden’s finally going to ask me to be his girlfriend!

After your classes were finished, you rushed back home and put on your finest summer dress, - one of a flowery pattern.

Maya met you when you passed the living room, and even she noticed the way you had put full effort into your appearance.

“Where are you going looking like that, Y/N?“ Maya asked through a giggle as her eyes scanned your look from head to toe with approval.

You chuckled lightheartedly, “To meet up with Hayden of course. He wrote through text that he had something he wanted to talk about.” You said. You leaned into Maya’s ear and whispered playfully, “I think he’s going to make it official with me.”

Maya gasped, “No way, that’s great! I’m so happy for you, Y/N.” She congratulated and gave you a hug.

“How’s it going with you and Finn by the way? It always seems like you’re in the honey moon phase.” You added your observation with a cheeky wink.

Maya blushed as she nodded, “Oh yes, things are going great between us. I think it’s safe to say I’ll continue staying over at his house considering how we are always together anyway. But of course I don’t want to be away all the time. I still want to be around you guys. I’m especially concerned about Bryce nowadays.” Maya expressed, which made your grin drop as your stepbrother was brought into her talk.

“Oh, why’s that?” You asked, confusion in your tone.

“I don’t know, he’s been so down lately, staying in his room all day and hardly putting sentences when I try to talk to him. I think he’s going through something but he won’t tell me what.”

You felt bad for Bryce after Maya had listed the several recent odd behavior from him, worried you might have broken his heart for leaving the taboo part of your relationship.

Your heart pounded at the thought of Bryce having genuine feelings for you. He had somewhat confirmed it himself when he said he had thought you were exclusive, but he hadn’t outright said it.

Somehow you longed for him to confess with those three simple words, but as the thought became appealing to you, you were reminded of the circumstances. The one of which each of your parent were married together, - ultimately sealing you to be only a family.

Maybe in a different universe we could have been together, but as of here it wouldn’t be right.

“Well, I hope whatever he’s going through resolves one way or another…Bryce always has solutions.” You reasoned, and Maya could only nod, hoping you were right even for this case too.

“I guess,…I’ll see you later then. Wishing you good luck with Hayden.”

“Thank you! Bye Maya!” You said your farewell as you stepped out of the house and walked to the bus stop.

A few bus stops later and you were downtown again, waiting for Hayden to make an appearance at the park any moment now.

“Hey, Y/N..” you heard a voice come from behind you, and you couldn’t contain your eager smile as your eyes met Hayden’s.

“Hayden, hi!”

Hayden smiled as you approached him and took in your look. “Wow, you look gorgeous by the way.” He complimented when you stood in front of him.

“Thanks! You don’t look so bad yourself.” You said and chuckled as you looked at his well ironed shirt and denim trousers. “So, you said you wanted to talk about something?”

Hayden nodded as his brows knitted together, almost out of concern. He must be nervous. “Yeah um…..Y/N, I uh…I don’t know how I’m supposed to put this but..” Hayden paused as he tried to find the courage to say what he was holding back. Your eyes didn’t leave Hayden’s as you excitedly waited for his completed saying.

“I…I have found someone else…”

Your eyes widened more than before, and you took a step back in shock, wondering if you had heard it wrong. “What are you saying?”

“I’m so sorry, Y/N.” Hayden apologized as he looked down at his feet with shame. “I…It wasn’t meant to happen but it was by mere coincidence that I met this other girl, and we just kind of clicked and…I hope you know I mean no disrespect to you. I never meant to waste your time, but I can’t help what my heart feels. I’ve developed feelings for her.”

You swallowed a lump down your throat as you blinked a few times due to your eyes beginning to water. You used your hand to wipe the moisture away, and you reluctantly nodded.

“I understand…I um, - I guess I’ll be on my way then.” You rambled something of the sort, turning your back against Hayden as you walked away.

“Y/N, wait…” Hayden stopped you as he jogged over to meet your face again. “We..- we can always stay friends, right? I never lied to you about the things I said. You are an amazing girl and the guy you end up with will be lucky to have you. It’s not because of you that I fell in love with someone else.”

You looked to the side, not wanting to look at the boy who had crushed your heart only a minute ago. “I’ll consider it. For now I would prefer keeping our distance, but thanks Hayden.” You replied while you tried your best to keep your facade of a smile, but it wasn’t easy. Hayden picked up on it and returned an apologetic smile as he turned to leave, giving you a final wave goodbye.

As expected, the house had no lights on when you returned. You figured Maya was at Finn’s again, like where she usually was. And Bryce,…well, his whereabouts didn’t come to mind yet.

You were clouded with sadness of what had happened today at the park. The tears hadn’t stopped glossing over your eyeballs, and it made it all the more harder to see what was in front of you as you stormed your way upstairs to your bedroom.

Suddenly you crashed into something, - or rather someone by the corner, and you fell onto the floor. You looked up to see Bryce, clearly startled by the collision.

“Woah, hey there. Got a little too distracted in wonderland, huh?” Bryce teased as he reached out his hand for you to grab. You glared at him and slapped his hand away as you stood up.

“Go to hell…” you muttered out of pure anger as another wave of emotion overtook you, making you break out another sob. Bryce frowned, until he caught on to understand you were crying, your eyes being bloodshot as the evening sun shone on your wet cheeks.

“Y/N? Wait - ”

You didn’t let him get to you as you ran towards your room, but Bryce was quick to follow, catching you by your arms before you could open the door to your bedroom.

“Sunny,…what’s wrong? Why are you crying?” He asked out of worry as he knelt down when your knees gave up. He hugged you tightly, his arms secured around your back as you cried on his shoulder. In Bryce’s mind, several scenarios came to mind of what could have upset you this much. Some were so dark, - it made him sick to his stomach. “Please, tell me what happened…look at me. I need to know, sunflower. What did he do to you?”

“H-He found someone else…” you sobbed out as you buried your face into his chest, hiding your tearful face from the world. “He didn’t love me after all…”

While Bryce was relieved it wasn’t something else, something considerably worse, he was still upset on your behalf. You could feel his hands clench into fists on your back and his form stiffen when he let out an exhale.

“I’m going to kill him.”

“No!” You quickly protested as you held Bryce by his arms. “No, please don’t start a fight with him…he can’t help it. There’s nothing I can do about it…he loves someone else and I can’t change that..”

Bryce shook his head, not buying into what he thought of was excuses. “Doesn’t matter. You didn’t deserve having your heart broken like this...”

You shrugged, not knowing what else there was to say. You simply pushed away from his chest, but you didn’t leave his grip.

“C’mon, I’ll take you to my room, okay?” Bryce offered as he made you stand on your feet again. He wiped your face with the use of his sweater, and to your surprise he carried you to his room.

He carefully placed you on his bed, removing the covers so you could both settle under it and keep warm while in this moment of comfort.

Bryce let you cry out whatever you had left in you as he stroked your bare shoulder, willing to wait for as long as you wanted until you wanted to talk again.

“I-I just want to be loved...” you muttered before you snifled, and it broke Bryce’s heart to hear you say something of that sort.

“You are loved, baby. We as a family love you, and I love you beyond being my stepsister,…you should know that by now….“ Bryce said as he stroked your hair affectionately. “Will you give it a chance? Do you love me too?”

You glanced at him, and it was as if you were going through a war with yourself, feeling conflicted of what feelings you may have. “Maybe,..and that scares me…”

Bryce smiled with adoration. “Of what exactly? There’s nothing to be scared of,…after all, love is love. We are two legal individuals from completely different families. Ain’t nothing wrong with us loving each other…” Bryce reasoned as he put a few hair strands behind your ear. “I’ll show you my love right now, sunny...will you allow me?”

You stared at him, feeling the familiar temptation of lust creeping up as you eyed his red lips. You wanted him. You wanted him so bad it almost hurt.

“Yes..” you quietly replied.

Your reply was cue for Bryce to connect his lips with yours, starting his act of affection with gentleness in the kiss.

“Good girl….my pretty sunflower…” He muttered in between kisses, and soon enough they were barely being detached. Bryce hovered above you while you made out, weak moans leaving your lips once in a while as Bryce’s left hand started to roam all around your body.

“Do you know why I call you sunflower?” Bryce asked when you stopped to breathe air, to which you shook your head. He had called you that since the very beginning, and somehow it hadn’t occurred in your mind as to why.

“Because your very existence is so bright and colorful - always turning to where the sun shines. I knew you would be a joy-bringer the moment you stepped into this big house. I knew even better when we fucked in that shed that we were perfect for each other. You made me want to commit, - and I started to share that dream you mentioned to me, - of making a family together some day.”

You let out a shuddered breath due to Bryce’s confession, and you felt you were going dizzy - in a good way - at the thought of having kids with him. Of spending your life with him nonetheless.

His hand squeezed your breast while he sucked on the skin of your throat, creating hickeys for him to marvel at later.

“My pretty girl…you’re too beautiful for me to only claim you as my stepsister. I’m going to claim you in a way that’s beyond friendly love, baby.” He huskily whispered as he managed to pull the sundress and bra down due to its elasticity.

You moaned when he suckled on your nipple, “It’s so wrong…”

He hummed, “Hmm..it’s maybe a little sinful but not wrong, sunny…don’t worry about a thing, we will get through this together, okay? Let your stepbrother take care of everything..”

Bryce hoisted up your sundress and cupped your sex, stroking it through your panties in a slow pace.

He pulled off your underwear and grinned when he got a full view of your dripping cunt. “I’ve missed this pussy…” Bryce muttered to himself as he began stroking your folds, slightly pushing a finger in every now and then to tease your aching hole.

“Bryce…” you moaned his name lewdly, and he chuckled at how desperate he had made you become.

“Baby, be patient…I’ll be balls deep inside this sweet cunt after I’ve had a taste…”

His finger started to pump deeper inside, bringing out your pussy juices for each thrust.

“Oh, my…” You whined and closed your eyes as you took in the feeling of his thick finger invading your channel. You let out breathless pants as he added more pressure, seeping in further the more slick he gathered.

“Sunny, look at me…” Bryce plead, and you fluttered your eyes open to see him lean in closer to your face as if he wanted to say something. “Tell me you love me too, baby…tell me so I know..”

He added a second, and you jolted as you stuttered out, “I-I love you too, Bryce. I love you s-so much…M’sorry for pushing you away. I’m sorry if I made you sad, I didn’t mean to. I -“

Your lips was held from speaking as Bryce crashed his lips into yours. You whimpered from the kiss, but easily melted into it.

“It’s okay, baby. I forgive you…I understand.” He withdrew his fingers from your pussy and put them close to his lips, sucking the sticky nectar off his fingers as he hummed, savoring the taste. “Fucking delicious…love your sweet pussy juice.”

Bryce stood on his knees, not leaving the bed as he unbuckled in front of you, his pants already showcasing the huge bulge and moisture of something leaking behind his boxers.

He dragged his pants and boxers down at once, revealing his fully erected cock, the tip of angry red as it pointed at you, leaking with pre-cum. You instinctively licked your lips, wanting to have a taste of him but you knew Bryce was past oral sex and was eager to skip to the main course.

He rested beside you again, and ordered you to raise your leg over his waist. You did as he commanded, and he positioned his cock on your cunt, lightly slapping your clit with his length which earned him a strained whine from you. He breathed into your ear, nibbling at your lobe before he pushed in.

“Did you let him fuck you?” Bryce asked through a growl. “Did you let him fuck my pussy?” The tip of his cock was the only part he was thrusting in, and it was making you crazy.

“N-No!” You denied right away through a cry. “I swear we didn’t! It’s just yours, Bryce!..”

Bryce chuckled darkly as he angled his cock and rammed himself in. “That’s right, baby. Only I can fuck this cunt, - it’s mine. Shit, you’re squeezing me so tight, feels too good..”

“Aaah, so big! Y-You’re so-!” Your sentence was interrupted as Bryce shoved a finger down your mouth, making you suck on it as he continued fucking you in a fast rhythm, making your head go blank from the sensation.

“Thas’ it…keep suckin’ it…such a good girl. Fuck, does it feel great to have a slutty stepsister at my disposal. My cute slutty stepsister…all prettied up in a sundress, looking all innocent when we both know you’re a whore, - so needy for your stepbrother’s cock…” Bryce degradingly spoke about you as if you weren’t beside him, knowing full well you enjoyed his harsh words with the way your pussy clamped around him.

“Y-Yes, I’m a whore for your cock! ..Aaaah, - I’m a whore for my stepbrother!…” You loudly moaned out your confession. He had his usual amused smirk which would normally make you want to slap him, but of course you would let him get away with anything when he was fucking you this good.

“Fucking shit, I’m going to cum….and I’m not pulling out. I’m going to plant my seed inside of you, sunny…you can’t be my sunflower without my seed.” He joked, briefly chuckling before it was replaced by his moans and grunts again.

The thought gave you another level of arousal, a need to have him fulfill what he had just proposed to do. “Cum inside of me, Bryce!” You whimpered as he pumped into you faster, his balls hitting your clit, giving you another shock of stimulation. “Ah! ~ I want you to fill me up!..n-need you to breed me!..”

“I know you do…gonna stuff you full of my spunk…every single drop inside your womb.”

He jackhammered into you with such intensity, it was overloading you with how close you were to cum. Bryce clenched his jaw as he felt you tighten, and he felt he was on the edge of orgasm too.

“Milk me, - Ooh holy shit! Take your stepbrother’s cum. Theeere you go, - good girl. Fuck!..” Bryce moaned as his thrusts became static. He let out a series of breathless pants as he stilled, pumping his load inside of you while your cunt clenched around him while you rode your orgasm.

“W-Warm…” you whimpered when you felt Bryce’s spend coat your insides, feeling some of it drip out from where you are first connected.

He pulled out and made no effort to stop his cum from oozing out of your cunt and onto his bedsheets. He was more willing to put his bedsheets in the washing machine than move.

He kissed the back of your head and loosened his hold on you. “Do you feel good, sunny? Did I fuck all the bad feelings out of you?”

“Mhm..” you hummed positively as you reached for his face and shared a loving kiss before you settled in a more comfortable position. “So…how is this going to work? Do we tell them or wait?” You asked as you began to wonder what was the next step.

“We can begin with telling Maya….she would accept us easily. As for your mom and my dad? Haven’t thought that far ahead yet. Maybe it’s best if we keep it from them for a while. I need to charm your mom more often if I don’t want her to kill me.” Bryce laughed, and you couldn’t help but snort.

“Yeah, I suppose that’s for the best…” you said above a whisper as you stared up at the ceiling.

Bryce couldn’t keep his eyes off you though, and held your chin to look at him again. “Hey….I love you, my sunflower. We’ll be just fine.”

You blushed, realization hitting you of how well spoken Bryce was with his words, and your heart thudded harder than they ever had with Hayden.

“I know,…I love you too, Bryce.”

He was perfect for you.

Hearts & Reblogs are very appreciated! <3

#bryce langley x reader #bryce langley x you #bryce langley x y/n #bryce langley #cevans character #chris evans #chris evans x reader #chris evans character fanfiction #harvard hottie #harvard hottie x reader

[matchamorphosis]

𝑫𝑹𝑬𝑨𝑴 𝑫𝑨𝑻𝑬𝑺, 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑑𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑚𝑏𝑜𝑦

introduction. a series of little dates and little-big moments within you and your dreamboy’s relationship.

disclaimers. 18+ content. this series has explicit content that no minors should expose themselves to. respect my wishes, happy reading to those who follow.

— museum melodrama · where you claim him as your Romeo and Hayden takes you as his Juliet.

— art gallery mischief · another moonlight night for another lovesick date, the space between you both nonexistent.

— tender of the night · a walk through the city leads to a carton of icecream being shared in the comfort of your kitchen.

— pitter patter paramour · you and Hayden resolve your bitter candle light dinner in the soft midnight rain. - current wip

— ding! ding! order up! · stacks of pancakes and sides of bacon can brighten up even the dullest afternoons between you two.

— the cosmos of me and you · bare bodies and naked hearts confess secrets to each other under the twinkle of the stars.

· series inspo. · m.masterlist. · library acc. · my taglist.

#♡⃗ : chris evans. #♡⃗ : harvard hottie. #hayden (harvard hottie) #harvard hottie × fem!reader #harvard hottie × woc!reader #harvard hottie × black!reader #harvard hottie smut #harvard hottie fluff #harvard hottie angst #chris evans smut #chris evans angst #chris evans fluff #chris evans series

[strawbeariediary]

𝐜𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬 𝐞𝐯𝐚𝐧𝐬 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐜 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬

·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ the chris evan characters mentioned in this masterlist include bryce langely, harvard hottie, ryan ackerman, jake wyler and kyle dawson.

➳ 𝑖𝑛𝑡𝑟𝑜𝑑𝑢𝑐𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛 — all works cited are mines. I do not own any of the marvel characters however my main characters are exclusively woc (arab, asian, latina, etc), black and of legal age.

➳ 𝑖𝑚𝑝𝑜𝑟𝑡𝑎𝑛𝑡 𝑟𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑛𝑑𝑒𝑟 — you have no permission to repost//republish, translate or steal any of my work whatsoever. even if you are going to credit me you do not have my consent to copy my work word by word then lazily “credit” me. do not recommend me on platforms such as tiktok, twitter, and other media consumption apps. furthermore, all my fics are meant to be read by people 18 years old and older. minors should not interfere or interact with my work. lastly, do not steal my work - my fairy godmother and my fairy friends will come for you.

➳ 𝑤𝑟𝑖𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑠 𝑛𝑜𝑡𝑒 — follow my writing blog @strawbeariefaerie and look through my main masterlist. if you can leave some feedback, it’s always greatly appreciated ˚₊· ♡

𝑠𝑒𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑠

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦𝐛𝐨𝐲 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬 — a series of dates featuring you and your beloved boyfriend Hayden, growing and achieving all your goals in the bright lights of New York City. — h.hayden

𝑑𝑖𝑠𝑐𝑙𝑎𝑖𝑚𝑒𝑟 — this is a harvard hottie series which possesses its own individual warnings. most of these chapters include smut or hint to sexual endeavors and are heavy on angst contents.

— 𝐚𝐩𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐞’𝐬 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐞: you and your dreamboy make a series of sex tapes worthy enough to claim spots in The Louvre. — h.hayden

𝑑𝑖𝑠𝑐𝑙𝑎𝑖𝑚𝑒𝑟 — this is a harvard hottie series that possesses its individual warnings yet importantly it contains explicit sexual context, smut, in all its chapters.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐚𝐟𝐭 𝐜𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐥𝐞𝐬 — follow the charming story of the twitchy witchy y/n Lovecraft as she starts college fresh from summer break. where the local rich witch bitch learns to love herself, prepares for existential catastrophes, and practices on her spell book casting vexes and charms. as well as endures the annoying troubles of having Jake Wyler as a boyfriend and has fun raising Hell with her demon possessed cat Lilith. — j.wyler

𝑑𝑖𝑠𝑐𝑙𝑎𝑖𝑚𝑒𝑟 — this is a jake wyler series that possesses dark elements of witchcraft, satanism, and biblical offenses. this series also hints to sexual endeavors but does not go into detail. reader and jake are of legal age so no one is underage.

𝑠𝑡𝑜𝑟𝑦𝑙𝑖𝑛𝑒 — summertime sadness ๑ SERIES ON HIATUS

𝑜𝑛𝑒𝑠ℎ𝑜𝑡𝑠

— 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤 𝐜𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐦𝐚𝐬 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥: You and Johnny unintentionally spend christmas together after a messy break up but that’s all you wanted. to finally be together again. — j.storm

— 𝐛𝐮𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐧 𝐞𝐲𝐞𝐝: y/n finds herself twined in the web of addicted fantasy, not knowing she’ll meet again with her crush; well her other crush- she is met with a life gripping warning. — j.wyler

— 𝐣𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐢𝐞𝐬!: The infamous football team from St. Johns wins the state championship yet on the bus ride home they are met with a winged flesh-hungry terror savoring the last day of its twenty three day eating frenzy. — j.wyler

— 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝: While the taste of human flesh is delectable on the tongue of Devil’s Kettle’s angel y/n l/n, she takes revenge on all the school boys who never stood a chance against her. As the spiteful y/n l/n satisfies her appetite on the male student population, her studly friend Kyle Lesniki finds out about her plan and vows to set an end to her carnage... or does he? — k.dawson

𝑠𝑡𝑜𝑟𝑦𝑙𝑖𝑛𝑒 — 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐞 — series on hiatus!

— 𝐯𝐫𝐨𝐨𝐦 𝐯𝐫𝐨𝐨𝐦: Minding your own business enjoying your girls night at the beach, you run into an ex. — r.ackerman

ℎ𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑐𝑎𝑛𝑛𝑜𝑛𝑠 & 𝑏𝑙𝑢𝑟𝑏𝑠

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐝𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐚𝐲𝐝𝐞𝐧 // 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐯𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐞

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 𝐡𝐚𝐲𝐝𝐞𝐧 // 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐯𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨𝐮𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐬

#·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ 𝑠𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑤𝑏𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑑𝑖𝑎𝑟𝑦 #more to come soon! #chris evans × fem!reader #chris evans × woc!reader #chris evans × black!reader #chris evans smut #chris evans fluff #chris evans angst #chris evans × reader #harvard hottie #harvard hottie × fem!reader #harvard hottie × black!reader #harvard hottie × woc!reader #harvard hottie × reader #ryan ackerman #ryan ackerman × fem!reader #ryan ackerman × black!reader #ryan ackerman × woc!reader #ryan ackerman × reader #jake wyler × reader #bryce langely #bryce langely × reader #bryce langely × fem!reader #bryce langely × black!reader #bryce langely × woc!reader #bryce langely smut #bryce langely angst #bryce langely fluff #ryan ackerman smut

[inklore]

happy end of january! i hope you all had a good month and great beginning of the year thus far <3

i decided to start something new (to me) on this lil ol blog of mine, to not only shine a light on more authors and their beautiful writings (who all deserve so so much love and recognition!!). but also having a compiled list of fics you adore is always wonderful to have, and even better when it can boost and promote those stories so others can find them too!!

thus this massive list of everything i’ve read in the month of january! i’ll be doing these every month, hopefully.

i broke it up into different sections/characters/fandoms for easy assessing. please do not spam like these works, no one likes a spam liker and comments and reblogs are the true way to show a writer love, please keep that in mind.

feel free to follow my fic recs blog ( @lorerecs ) !

and lastly, thank you to all of you beautiful souls and amazing writers for sharing your works with all of us on this hellsite. you are loved and appreciated 🤎

18+ ONLY MINORS DNI with the works below.

these are mostly all smutty, but please keep in mind you are in control of your own media consumption.

* = dark/heed warnings | ! = fluffy/angst

CHRIS EVANS CHARACTERS

All I  Want For Christmas Is You by @jamalflanagan

He’s always a Scrooge this time of year, but this year it’s different. (ransom drysdale)

Bombette by @/jamalflanagan

It’s a new year, and you want more than you’ve been given. (steve rogers)

The Chat Room by @sagechanoafterdark

Steve has learned some valuable things over the years of perusing the internet. But he forgot one valuable lesson: You never know who you’re talking to online.

Earned It by @littlelioncub43

Andy always works so hard, and he’s earned a little break, don’t you think?

Seething Brains by @onsunnyside *

When the innocent lamb is lost and alone, beasts are bound to come—only in your case, they’re disguised as virtuous, charming shepherds. (soft!dark steve rogers x reader x soft!dark ransom drysdale)

High For You by @river-soul *

Your neighbor Syd takes advantage of your kindness.

Warmth by @kaitkat

After months on the run, you’re finally hit with your biggest fear: sharing a bed with Steve Rogers.

Naughty List by @clints-lucky-arrow

Johnny Storm is a lot of things. Handsome, flirtatious, supposedly unavailable, and your brother’s best friend. Another thing that he happpens to be is regularly fucking you, but that’s meant to be a secret. Not that Johnny pays much heed to anything inconsequential like that.

Art Gallery Mischief by @strawbeariefaerie

Another moonlight night for another lovesick date. (hayden ‘harvard hottie’)

Dance In The Dark by @honeystevie *

The lost ghost of Captain Steve Rogers lingers around your home. Ever so lonely, he takes solace in you — the new object of his obsession.

I Hate U by @/jamalflanagan !

And if you wondered if I hate you, I do. (ransom drysdale)

Enjoy The Show by @sunshinebuckybarnes

There’s never any time to let your guard down on the run. That is until Steve stumbles upon your show.

Minutia by @kthynes

Jealous and possesive Mob!Steve.

Knifepoint by @boxofbonesfic *

You had so many plans for the summer—you were going to spread your wings, you were going to move out of your parents house, get a new job. (steve rogers)

This Is For Us by @barnesafterglow

You’ll do anything Ari asks, even if it means helping him with a home video.

SEBASTIAN STAN CHARACTERS

As You’re Told by @/jamalflanagan *

You have something he wants, and Nick plans to get it.

Notam by @gogolucky13 *

You’ve seen many things and met many people on your travels, but nothing could’ve ever prepared you for the White Wolf and what he has planned for you. (cultleader!bucky barnes)

Lovers Quarrel by @/jamalflanagan

It’s just a little back and forth between lovers. (nick fowler)

Perfection In The Accident by @aphrogeneias !

You were not having a good day. After locking yourself out of your own apartment, you receive help from who you least expected - the neighbor you’d been crushing on since you moved in, Bucky Barnes.

For Better Or For Worse by @ambrosiase !

You learn the truth about Bucky’s affair, and deal with the aftermath.

Uncool by @/aphrogenias !

In the summer of 1973, after covering the howling commandos’ concert for a night, you - a young and inexperienced music journalist - accidentally end up following the up and coming band from New York City across the country. between shows, parties, backstage nonsense, interviews and failed attempts at writing a cover story for rolling stone magazine, you end up developing a love/hate relationship with their brooding, but devilishly handsome, guitarist james “call me Bucky” Barnes.

Remember Me In Red by @heavenlybarnes !

You swore you’d never return Bucky’s henley. But after your breakup, hanging on to it is just too damn painful.

The Color Of Morose by @littlenymphie !

Bucky always goes to you after a mission. You’re the only person that he lets heal him, maybe because no one else truly can.

After Party by @xxindiglow *

Bucky doesn’t take kindly to rejection. I hate doing summaries. Bucky is an ass bag and the reader is in for a rollercoaster ride. Just read it please?

Truth Untold by @lavendercitizen *

Nick isn’t who he seems to be, and once you realize that it’s too late. But he’s not leaving without you.

In The Late Hours, I’m Yours To Have by @cityofstqrs

You and Bucky have an agreement and Bucky knows the best way to wake you up.

BARRY KEOGHAN CHARACTERS

Forward Motion Through The Water by @greenorangevioletgrass

You find unexpected company in your late-night swim. (joe ‘mammal’)

We Shouldn’t Do This Here... by @siempre-bucky

Druig asks if you want to hook up with him during one of Sersi’s parties.

Set My Soul Alight by @/aphrogeneias

You and Druig have been fighting for too long, long enough that you’ve began to mistake what your true feeling are.

TASM!PETER PARKER

Leave The Suit On by @/clints-lucky-arrow

After a few months of dating, yourself and Peter decide to try something new with his webs.

Yes Dear? by @wint3r-h3art

Peter is in grey sweatpants while fixing his suit and you can’t help yourself.

Puzzle Piece Love by @marlboromatt

Begging and thigh riding.

Worth It by @/jamalflanagan *

Your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man decides to make you earn what you’ve stolen.

Sold by @/boxofbonesfic

Mob!Peter Parker.

ETC MARVEL CHARACTERS

Safety First by @babblydrabbly

You don’t trust motorcycles. But now that you know about Venom, Eddie and his symbiote offer you a ride with safety guaranteed.

Sweetheart... by @/wint3er-h3eart

A late night visit from Frank leads to a confession, that leads to something more. (frank castle)

Anonymous by @/boxofbonesfic *

On Halloween, people dress up as monsters. But sometimes, the monsters dress up as people, too. (eddie brock)

Pain. Blood On My Tongue by @joannasteez

In the midst of a lie emerges some truth. (frank castle)

When All Is Lost by @dreamysreverie

Thena wakes from another nightmare, and you suggest something to help calm her.

Something Sweet by @fluffyprettykitty !

Coming home to your boyfriend baking. (sam wilson)

THE WITCHER

Baby Thot by @babyjordy

Geralt spitting ale into your mouth.

Iridescent by @cinewhore

You show Triss just how much she means to you.

if you would like me to remove your works within this list, for whatever reason, please let me know and i will kindly do so!

#fic recs #marvel recs #marvel smut #fic recommendation #fic recommendations #marvel fanfic #marvel fic recs #marvel fics #smut recs #smut recommendations #january fic recs #monthly fic recs !

[buckyshusband0]

Which fic should I write next?

Most Votes from both sections gets written next! 

Chris Evans

The CEO’s Affair (CEO!Chris Evans) 

Found Tapes (Andy Barber) | Extreme Angst 

Dangerous Desires (Biker!Ari Levinson) 

Harvard’s Hottie (Playboy!Colin Shea) 

Shining Diamonds (Chris Evans x Stripper!MR) 

Sebastian Stan

The Angel You Once Knew (Bucky Barnes) 

Dear, Bucky Barnes (Bucky Barnes) | Fake dating 

Crimson Walls (Detective!Bucky Barnes) 

Painful Overdose (Sebastian Stan) 

Love Bites (Vampire!Bucky Barnes)

#chris evans x male reader #chris evans x reader #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan x male reader #andy barber #bucky barnes x male reader #colin shea #ari levinson

[visbiscuit]

25 Days of CHRIS-mas ( masterlist )

Santa's not in town yet, but my Chris(t)mas spirit is stronger than ever! From the idea of @wiypt-writes, this is a collection of imagines of Chris Evans' characters (hence the CHRIS-mas in the title). Each one of them will have its own warnings, so always pay attention to those if you do not want to read something you're not entirely comfortable with. ONLY THE LAST ONE-SHOT WILL BE CHRISTMAS THEMED, so you can read the others without being continuously smothered by the holidays!

If you want to participate, just visit @wiypt-writes' profile and you will find all the info you need to try and spend December thinking about Chris Evans for a reason (not that you need one).

I'm sorry to inform you that the fics here will always have a fem!oc or a fem!reader, it's the way I am used to, but if you want me to write with neutral pronouns or male pronouns, I can definitely try!

PEOPLE UNDER 18 ARE NOT ALLOWED!

if you want to read more stories written by yours truly, this is my lovely Masterlist.

1 . Jake Wyler (Not Another Teen Movie)

DAYDREAMING, jake wyler x fem!reader

[ fluff and cringe ]

Jake Wyler never noticed her through high school, but she noticed him. Oh, she did, all right. What happens when she finds out that he not only noticed her but even knew her deepest secret?

2. Kyle (Perfect Score)

OUR PAL IS DOOMED, pumba!kyle x timon,fem!reader

[ fluff and comedy ]

Matty is completely smitten with Francesca. What about Kyle and Y/N? Where does this leave them? The trio is probably going to be forgotten if they do not do something and this cannot happen. This is how Kyle and Y/N try to stop love from blossoming, but it does anyway and not only between Matty and Francesca.

3. Ryan (Cellular)

WHISTLE STOP, robin hood!ryan x fem!reader

[ smut ]

Ryan Ackerman steals from the rich and gives to the poor. He breaks into houses and tries to take as many things as he can to help his people. He always whistles while entering a house to see if someone's inside. One day, he accidentally enters his old employer's house and finally meets his daughter, Y/N, who doesn't call the police but... blows his whistle.

4. Bryce Langley (Fierce People)

I'M KISSING YOU, romeo!bryce x juliet,fem!reader

[ fluff and smut ]

Their families do not want to see them together. It would be a scandal. Centuries of hatred cannot be wiped out by a stupid young love. Except that it can, and it will. Bryce and Y/N know how much their love is worth and they finally decide to act upon it after years of pining for each other.

SKIPPED FOR NOW

5. Johnny Storm (Fantastic Four)

COMIN' UNDER FIRE, johnny storm x grimm,fem!reader

[ smut ]

She is Ben's daughter. She is off-limits. No one is allowed to look at her, touch her, charm her, or kiss her. Let me rephrase that: Johnny isn't allowed to be close to her in any shape or form. If Ben finds out that Johnny did something to his baby girl, he'd kill him and reduce him to ash. Pun intended. But does Johnny care? Not even a little.

6. Syd (London)

SYMPHONY, neighbor!syd x violinist,fem!reader

[ fluff ]

He's moved on from London. He is clean now, he went to rehab and is ready to start his new life. His new neighborhood is full of green areas, dogs and comes with a pretty little thing by the name of Y/N. He always listens carefully to her practicing the violin and he swears he's falling more in love with her each new symphony.

SKIPPED FOR NOW

7. Mace (Sunshine)

THE REASON WHY, james mace x fem!reader

[ fluff and angst ]

!! the reader is dead in this one !!

While on Icarus II, Mace is distracted. Everybody notices, but nobody knows why. In his head, he's thinking about his first love and how she influenced him to choose this path. He still cannot believe that she's not with him anymore. Maybe after this suicide mission, he'll see her again.

8. Harvard Hottie (The Nanny Diaries)

WOLF LIKE ME, dilf!hayden x baby sitter,fem!reader

[ smut ]

The wolf loses the hair but not the vice. Hayden already has had a love story with a nanny, but history always repeats itself. The problem now is that Y/N is not just a random nanny, she's his children's nanny and he definitely can't fall into temptation with her. He knows that Y/N wants him, he can see how her eyes devour him. Now he has to choose what to do, if she's worth it or not.

9. Paul Diskant (Street Kings)

SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU, paul diskant x lawyer,fem!reader

[ smut ]

They cannot stand each other. Y/N thinks that Paul is an arrogant piece of shit who sadly knows how to do his job and Paul is certain that Y/N exists just to ruin his, otherwise, happy life with her sassy remarks. They often are assigned on cases together and the only way to not constantly butt heads is releasing their tension. They cannot stand each other during the daytime, but during the night... that's when they come to play.

10. Jimmy Dobyne (Loss Of A Tear Drop Diamond)

CIGARETTES BLUES, jimmy dobyne x fem!reader

[ smut ]

Jimmy smokes, he smokes a lot. Always lits up a cigarette. Every free moment is an opportunity to take a drag on his favorite poison. He smokes during lunchtime, while horse riding, while taking a relaxing bath, and while he's receiving the best blowjob of his life. Did I say cigarettes are his favorite poison? Scratch that, she is.

11 Nick Gant (Push)

12 Jake Jensen (The Losers)

13 Lucas Lee (Scott Pilgrim)

14 Mike Weiss (Puncture/Injustice)

15 Steve Rogers (Captain America)

16 Colin Shea (What’s Your Number)

17 Mr. Freezy (The Iceman)

18 Curtis Everett (Snowpiercer)

19 Nick Vaughn (Before We Go)

20 Me (Playing It Cool)

21 Frank Adler (Gifted)

22 Ari Levinson (The Red Sea Diving Resort)

23 Ransom Drysdale (Knives Out)

24 Andy Barber (Defending Jacob)

25 Chris Evans (as himself!)

#wiypt25daysofchrismas #writingchallenge #chris evans #jake wyler #ari levinson #ransom drysdale #andy barber #chris evans x reader #colin shea #steve rogers #johnny storm #jake jensen #nick grant #it's christmas

[namelessskies]

Manhwa crack crossover, housemate reality show edition AU

Okay, my brain won't stop feeding me various AUs. As usual, still crossover - the more the merrier, right? .

So, my country has a reality show called "PBB" or Pinoy Big Brother. It's basically a reality show where a bunch of people all over the country gets selected to live in "Kuya's" house. There, they interact with other chosen contestants and participate in tasks for charity purposes.

If there are any fellow Filipino peeps out there who knows this better than I do - because I only watch snippets - please feel free to comment, because my knowledge is very limited. I get the gist of it, but that's it.

Chosen housemates are of course, our lovely main leads.

Cue Yvonne (if you wish to use the Leila'd one) being the leech housemate who gets on the viewer's nerves but somehow still able to stay inside the house. Penelope is the one who joined to escape the Eckart family - but somehow, in an ironic twist of fate, she gets saddled with them, again. Callisto is the one who hurriedly joined the show because of Icklies's appearance - idk if this one's gonna be yandere, since Icklies doesn't really have a reason to hate her.

Athy is among the first batch of contestants, along with Penelope, Aristia - who just broke up with her ex. Athy joined the show without Claude's permission but with Lilly's - AGAIN, bonus angst points, they do not have a good relationship, because I like it that way.

Lucas is the prodigy who has too much time on his hands so he joins and he and Athy then proceeds to unintentionally make the cutest couple. IDK if you guys want to add in Ijekiel, but if you want love triangle, go off, I guess. Where LucAthy is the cute couple, PeneLlisto is the fierce one, but ultimately, I feel that PeneLlisto will be the more hilarious one. PeneLlisto starts off on the wrong foot, like the novel.

Penelope is the Preppy Queen who was made with too much sass, beauty, and brains, and little awareness of her love life.

Penelope is hilariously oblivious to Callisto's advances, so while Penelope is stating to "Kuya" just how much she is afraid of Callisto since they both grew up on the same village/block/condominium building - your choice - then being absolutely horrified at the notion that he has a thing for her and grossly misunderstanding Callisto's advances while Callisto is just over there, calling her Princess and being so caring and loveable - in his own way - I'm talking about the bear scene in the novel, kind of like that, where Callisto gives her the bear's head with no malicious intention but Penelope misinterprets it as him asking her for a duel to death. The reason for why Penelope is afraid of him is because she singlehandedly witnessed him beat the shit out of guys twice his size.

Heart-to-heart moment between Reynold and Penelope - if you wish - where Reynold asks Penelope why she ran away from home and then them resolving their issues - not quite, but at least Reynold was sensible enough to recognize his faults (unlike someone over there).

For Aristia, I'm sorry for RuveTia shippers but personally, I'm more of a SeinTia - you decide either of the three will be the ex and who will be the ending loveteam. For extra drama, Jieun can join in on the show, same to Jeannette.

Mildred (I Raised Cindrella Preciously) is the very pretty single mother - forced into the show by her daughters where they think she can gain another chance at love since the blind dates weren't working - who is ready to listen to everyone and be the mother most of them never had. Daniel is the Harvard Hottie who eventually just becomes the dad figure to the others. It is glaringly clear that Daniel is interested in Mildred, but Mildred is another level of oblivious, so let's just say they're like PeneLlisto with the exception of fierce.

Keira is the one who gained a rebellious streak and insisted on going to the reality show since Cossette's arrival to their house. Her Dad reluctantly agrees on it, and thinks nothing more of it, until he spends the rest of the show lowkey jealous over Mildred and Daniel since he realized how much of a douchebag he was to Keira.

Definitely, cue many breakdown moments for our lovestarved main leads, them bemoaning about their family situations and stuff like that.

To be honest, I can see Derrick being the first to get evicted. The guy is seriously so infuriating. I think the viewers will feel the same way we readers did.

Add the characters you also wish to be in the reality show as well as their background, and if you can, also a nickname for them - I'm shit at it, but an example is Daniel being "Harvard Hottie" - as well as the challenges and tasks for them.

#PBB #Pinoy Big Brother #housemates #manhwa #Filipino #Filipino reality show #I Raised Cinderella Preciously #Mildred #Daniel #DITOEFTV #death is the only ending for a villainess #villains are destined to die #Penelope #Penelope Eckart #Callisto #Callisto Regulus #Derrick #Derrick Eckart #Reynold #Reynold Eckart #Leila #Yvonne #Emily #Eckart #suddenly became a princess one day #who made me a princess #Athanasia #athanasia de alger obelia #matt lucas #wmmap lucas

[chrisevansluv]

Here is the 2012 Detail Magazine interview with chris evans:

The Avengers' Chris Evans: Just Your Average Beer-Swilling, Babe-Loving Buddhist

The 30-year-old Bud Light-chugging, Beantown-bred star of The Avengers is widely perceived as the ultimate guy's guy. But beneath the bro persona lies a serious student of Buddhism, an unrepentant song-and-dance man, and a guy who talks to his mom about sex. And farts.

By Adam Sachs,

Photographs by Norman Jean Roy

May 2012 Issue

"Should we just kill him and bury his body?" Chris Evans is stage whispering into the impassive blinking light of my digital recorder.

"Chris!" shouts his mother, her tone a familiar-to-anyone-with-a-mother mix of coddling and concern. "Don't say that! What if something happened?"

We're at Evans' apartment, an expansive but not overly tricked-out bachelor-pad-ish loft in a semi-industrial nowheresville part of Boston, hard by Chinatown, near an area sometimes called the Combat Zone. Evans has a fuzzy, floppy, slept-in-his-clothes aspect that'd be nearly unrecognizable if you knew him only by the upright, spit-polished bearing of the onscreen hero. His dog, East, a sweet and slobbery American bulldog, is spread out on a couch in front of the TV. The shelves of his fridge are neatly stacked with much of the world's supply of Bud Light in cans and little else.

On the counter sit a few buckets of muscle-making whey-protein powder that belong to Evans' roommate, Zach Jarvis, an old pal who sometimes tags along on set as a paid "assistant" and a personal trainer who bulked Evans up for his role as the super-ripped patriot in last summer's blockbuster Captain America: The First Avenger. A giant clock on the exposed-brick wall says it's early evening, but Evans operates on his own sense of time. Between gigs, his schedule's all his, which usually translates into long stretches of alone time during the day and longer social nights for the 30-year-old.

"I could just make this . . . disappear," says Josh Peck, another old pal and occasional on-set assistant, in a deadpan mumble, poking at the voice recorder I'd left on the table while I was in the bathroom.

Evans' mom, Lisa, now speaks directly into the microphone: "Don't listen to them—I'm trying to get them not to say these things!"

But not saying things isn't in the Evans DNA. They're an infectiously gregarious clan. Irish-Italians, proud Bostoners, close-knit, and innately theatrical. "We all act, we sing," Evans says. "It was like the fucking von Trapps." Mom was a dancer and now runs a children's theater. First-born Carly directed the family puppet shows and studied theater at NYU. Younger brother Scott has parts on One Life to Live and Law & Order under his belt and lives in Los Angeles full-time—something Evans stopped doing several years back. Rounding out the circle are baby sister Shanna and a pair of "strays" the family brought into their Sudbury, Massachusetts, home: Josh, who went from mowing the lawn to moving in when his folks relocated during his senior year in high school; and Demery, who was Evans' roommate until recently.

"Our house was like a hotel," Evans says. "It was a loony-tunes household. If you got arrested in high school, everyone knew: 'Call Mrs. Evans, she'll bail you out.'"

Growing up, they had a special floor put in the basement where all the kids practiced tap-dancing. The party-ready rec room also had a Ping-Pong table and a separate entrance. This was the house kids in the neighborhood wanted to hang at, and this was the kind of family you wanted to be adopted by. Spend an afternoon listening to them dish old dirt and talk over each other and it's easy to see why. Now they're worried they've said too much, laid bare the tender soul of the actor behind the star-spangled superhero outfit, so there's talk of offing the interviewer. I can hear all this from the bathroom, which, of course, is the point of a good stage whisper.

To be sure, no one's said too much, and the more you're brought into the embrace of this boisterous, funny, shit-slinging, demonstrably loving extended family, the more likable and enviable the whole dynamic is.

Sample exchange from today's lunch of baked ziti at a family-style Italian restaurant:

Mom: When he was a kid, he asked me, 'Mom, will I ever think farting isn't funny?'

Chris: You're throwing me under the bus, Ma! Thank you.

Mom: Well, if a dog farts you still find it funny.

Then, back at the apartment, where Mrs. Evans tries to give me good-natured dirt on her son without freaking him out:

Mom: You always tell me when you think a girl is attractive. You'll call me up so excited. Is that okay to say?

Chris: Nothing wrong with that.

Mom: And can I say all the girls you've brought to the house have been very sweet and wonderful? Of course, those are the ones that make it to the house. It's been a long time, hasn't it?

Chris: Looooong time.

Mom: The last one at our house? Was it six years ago?

Chris: No names, Ma!

Mom: But she knocked it out of the park.

Chris: She got drunk and puked at Auntie Pam's house! And she puked on the way home and she puked at our place.

Mom: And that's when I fell in love with her. Because she was real.

We're operating under a no-names rule, so I'm not asking if it's Jessica Biel who made this memorable first impression. She and Evans were serious for a couple of years. But I don't want to picture lovely Jessica Biel getting sick at Auntie Pam's or in the car or, really, anywhere.

East the bulldog ambles over to the table, begging for food.

"That dog is the love of his life," Mrs. Evans says. "Which tells me he'll be an unbelievable parent, but I don't want him to get married right now." She turns to Chris. "The way you are, I just don't think you're ready."

Some other things I learn about Evans from his mom: He hates going to the gym; he was so wound-up as a kid she'd let him stand during dinner, his legs shaking like caged greyhounds; he suffered weekly "Sunday-night meltdowns" over schoolwork and the angst of the sensitive middle-schooler; after she and his father split and he was making money from acting, he bought her the Sudbury family homestead rather than let her leave it.

Eventually his mom and Josh depart, and Evans and I go to work depleting his stash of Bud Light. It feels like we drink Bud Light and talk for days, because we basically do. I arrived early Friday evening; it's Saturday night now and it'll be sunup Sunday before I sleeplessly make my way to catch a train back to New York City. Somewhere in between we slip free of the gravitational pull of the bachelor pad and there's bottle service at a club and a long walk with entourage in tow back to Evans' apartment, where there is some earnest-yet-surreal group singing, piano playing, and chitchat. Evans is fun to talk to, partly because he's an open, self-mocking guy with an explosive laugh and no apparent need to sleep, and partly because when you cut just below the surface, it's clear he's not quite the dude's dude he sometimes plays onscreen and in TV appearances.

From a distance, Chris Evans the movie star seems a predictable, nearly inevitable piece of successful Hollywood packaging come to market. There's his major-release debut as the dorkily unaware jock Jake in the guilty pleasure Not Another Teen Movie (in one memorable scene, Evans has whipped cream on his chest and a banana up his ass). The female-friendly hunk appeal—his character in The Nanny Diaries is named simply Harvard Hottie—is balanced by a kind of casual-Friday, I'm-from-Boston regular-dudeness. Following the siren song of comic-book cash, he was the Human Torch in two Fantastic Four films. As with scrawny Steve Rogers, the Captain America suit beefed up his stature as a formidable screen presence, a bankable leading man, all of which leads us to The Avengers, this season's megabudget, megawatt ensemble in which he stars alongside Scarlett Johansson, Mark Ruffalo, Robert Downey Jr., and Chris Hemsworth.

It all feels inevitable—and yet it nearly didn't happen. Evans repeatedly turned down the Captain America role, fearing he'd be locked into what was originally a nine-picture deal. He was shooting Puncture, about a drug-addicted lawyer, at the time. Most actors doing small-budget legal dramas would jump at the chance to play the lead in a Marvel franchise, but Evans saw a decade of his life flash before his eyes.

What he remembers thinking is this: "What if the movie comes out and it's a success and I just reject all of this? What if I want to move to the fucking woods?"

By "the woods," he doesn't mean a quiet life away from the spotlight, some general metaphorical life escape route. He means the actual woods. "For a long time all I wanted for Christmas were books about outdoor survival," he says. "I was convinced that I was going to move to the woods. I camped a lot, I took classes. At 18, I told myself if I don't live in the woods by the time I'm 25, I have failed."

Evans has described his hesitation at signing on for Captain America. Usually he talks about the time commitment, the loss of what remained of his relative anonymity. On the junkets for the movie, he was open about needing therapy after the studio reduced the deal to six movies and he took the leap. What he doesn't usually mention is that he was racked with anxiety before the job came up.

"I get very nervous," Evans explains. "I shit the bed if I have to present something on stage or if I'm doing press. Because it's just you." He's been known to walk out of press conferences, to freeze up and go silent during the kind of relaxed-yet-high-stakes meetings an actor of his stature is expected to attend: "Do you know how badly I audition? Fifty percent of the time I have to walk out of the room. I'm naturally very pale, so I turn red and sweat. And I have to literally walk out. Sometimes mid-audition. You start having these conversations in your brain. 'Chris, don't do this. Chris, take it easy. You're just sitting in a room with a person saying some words, this isn't life. And you're letting this affect you? Shame on you.'"

Shades of "Sunday-night meltdowns." Luckily the nerves never follow him to the set. "You do your neuroses beforehand, so when they yell 'Action' you can be present," he says.

Okay, there was one on-set panic attack—while Evans was shooting Puncture. "We were getting ready to do a court scene in front of a bunch of people, and I don't know what happened," he says. "It's just your brain playing games with you. 'Hey, you know how we sometimes freak out? What if we did it right now?'"

One of the people who advised Evans to take the Captain America role was his eventual Avengers costar Robert Downey Jr. "I'd seen him around," Downey says. "We share an agent. I like to spend a lot of my free time talking to my agent about his other clients—I just had a feeling about him."

What he told Evans was: This puppy is going to be big, and when it is you're going to get to make the movies you want to make. "In the marathon obstacle course of a career," Downey says, "it's just good to have all the stats on paper for why you're not only a team player but also why it makes sense to support you in the projects you want to do—because you've made so much damned money for the studio."

There's also the fact that Evans had a chance to sign on for something likely to be a kind of watershed moment in the comic-book fascination of our time. "I do think The Avengers is the crescendo of this superhero phase in entertainment—except of course for Iron Man 3," Downey says. "It'll take a lot of innovation to keep it alive after this."

Captain America is the only person left who was truly close to Howard Stark, father of Tony Stark (a.k.a. Iron Man), which meant that Evans' and Downey's story lines are closely linked, and in the course of doing a lot of scenes together, they got to be pals. Downey diagnoses his friend with what he terms "low-grade red-carpet anxiety disorder."

"He just hates the game-show aspect of doing PR," Downey says. "Obviously there's pressure for anyone in this transition he's in. But he will easily triple that pressure to make sure he's not being lazy. That's why I respect the guy. I wouldn't necessarily want to be in his skin. But his motives are pure. He just needs to drink some red-carpet chamomile."

"The majority of the world is empty space," Chris Evans says, watching me as if my brain might explode on hearing this news—or like he might have to fight me if I try to contradict him. We're back at his apartment after a cigarette run through the Combat Zone.

"Empty space!" he says again, slapping the table and sort of yelling. Then, in a slow, breathy whisper, he repeats: "Empty space, empty space. All that we see in the world, the life, the animals, plants, people, it's all empty space. That's amazing!" He slaps the table again. "You want another beer? Gotta be Bud Light. Get dirty—you're in Boston. Okay, organize your thoughts. I gotta take a piss . . ."

My thoughts are this: That this guy who is hugging his dog and talking to me about space and mortality and the trouble with Boston girls who believe crazy gossip about him—this is not the guy I expected to meet. I figured he'd be a meatball. Though, truthfully, I'd never called anyone a meatball until Evans turned me on to the put-down. As in: "My sister Shanna dates meatballs." And, more to the point: "When I do interviews, I'd rather just be the beer-drinking dude from Boston and not get into the complex shit, because I don't want every meatball saying, 'So hey, whaddyathink about Buddhism?'"

At 17, Evans came across a copy of Hermann Hesse's Siddhartha and began his spiritual questing. It's a path of study and struggle that, he says, defines his true purpose in life. "I love acting. It's my playground, it lets me explore. But my happiness in this world, my level of peace, is never going to be dictated by acting," he says. "My goal in life is to detach from the egoic mind. Do you know anything about Eastern philosophy?"

I sip some Bud Light and shake my head sheepishly. "They talk about the egoic mind, the part of you that's self-aware, the watcher, the person you think is driving this machine," he says. "And that separation from self and mind is the root of suffering. There are ways of retraining the way you think. This isn't really supported in Western society, which is focused on 'Go get it, earn it, win it, marry it.'"

Scarlett Johansson says that one of the things she appreciates about Evans is how he steers clear of industry chat when they see each other. "Basically every actor," she says, "including myself, when we finish a job we're like, 'Well, that's it for me. Had a good run. Put me out to pasture.' But Chris doesn't strike me as someone who frets about the next job." The two met on the set of The Perfect Score when they were teenagers and have stayed close; The Avengers is their third movie together. "He has this obviously masculine presence—a dude's dude—and we're used to seeing him play heroic characters," Johansson says, "but he's also surprisingly sensitive. He has close female friends, and you can talk to him about anything. Plus there's that secret song-and-dance, jazz-hands side of Chris. I feel like he grew up with the Partridge Family. He'd be just as happy doing Guys and Dolls as he would Captain America 2."

East needs to do his business, so Evans and I take him up to the roof deck. Evans bought this apartment in 2010 when living in L.A. full-time no longer appealed to him. He came back to stay close to his extended family and the intimate circle of Boston pals he's maintained since high school. The move also seems like a pretty clear keep-it-real hedge against the manic ego-stroking distractions of Hollywood.

"I think my daytime person is different than my nighttime person," Evans says. "With my high-school buddies, we drink beer and talk sports and it's great. The kids in my Buddhism class in L.A., they're wildly intelligent, and I love being around them, but they're not talking about the Celtics. And that's part of me. It's a strange dichotomy. I don't mind being a certain way with some people and having this other piece of me that's just for me."

I asked Downey about Evans' outward regular-Joe persona. "It's complete horseshit," Downey says. "There's an inherent street-smart intelligence there. I don't think he tries to hide it. But he's much more evolved and much more culturally aware than he lets on."

Perhaps the meatball and the meditation can coexist. We argue about our egoic brains and the tao of Boston girls. "I love wet hair and sweatpants," he says in their defense. "I like sneakers and ponytails. I like girls who aren't so la-di-da. L.A. is so la-di-da. I like Boston girls who shit on me. Not literally. Girls who give me a hard time, bust my chops a little."

The chief buster of Evans' chops is, of course, Evans himself. "The problem is, the brain I'm using to dissect this world is a brain formed by it," he says. "We're born into confusion, and we get the blessing of letting go of it." Then he adds: "I think this shit by day. And then night comes and it's like, 'Fuck it, let's drink.'"

And so we do. It's getting late. Again. We should have eaten dinner, but Evans sometimes forgets to eat: "If I could just take a pill to make me full forever, I wouldn't think twice."

We talk about his dog and camping with his dog and why he loves being alone more than almost anything except maybe not being alone. "I swear to God, if you saw me when I am by myself in the woods, I'm a lunatic," he says. "I sing, I dance. I do crazy shit."

Evans' unflagging, all-encompassing enthusiasm is impressive, itself a kind of social intelligence. "If you want to have a good conversation with him, don't talk about the fact that he's famous" was the advice I got from Mark Kassen, who codirected Puncture. "He's a blast, a guy who can hang. For quite a long time. Many hours in a row."

I've stopped looking at the clock. We've stopped talking philosophy and moved into more emotional territory. He asks questions about my 9-month-old son, and then Captain America gets teary when I talk about the wonder of his birth. "I weep at everything," he says. "I emote. I love things so much—I just never want to dilute that."

He talks about how close he feels to his family, how open they all are with each other. About everything. All the time. "The first time I had sex," he says, "I raced home and was like, 'Mom, I just had sex! Where's the clit?'"

Wait, I ask—did she ever tell you?

"Still don't know where it is, man," he says, then breaks into a smile composed of equal parts shit-eating grin and inner peace. "I just don't know. Make some movies, you don't have to know…"

Here is the 2012 Detail Magazine interview with chris evans:

The Avengers' Chris Evans: Just Your Average Beer-Swilling, Babe-Loving Buddhist

The 30-year-old Bud Light-chugging, Beantown-bred star of The Avengers is widely perceived as the ultimate guy's guy. But beneath the bro persona lies a serious student of Buddhism, an unrepentant song-and-dance man, and a guy who talks to his mom about sex. And farts.

By Adam Sachs,

Photographs by Norman Jean Roy

May 2012 Issue

"Should we just kill him and bury his body?" Chris Evans is stage whispering into the impassive blinking light of my digital recorder.

"Chris!" shouts his mother, her tone a familiar-to-anyone-with-a-mother mix of coddling and concern. "Don't say that! What if something happened?"

We're at Evans' apartment, an expansive but not overly tricked-out bachelor-pad-ish loft in a semi-industrial nowheresville part of Boston, hard by Chinatown, near an area sometimes called the Combat Zone. Evans has a fuzzy, floppy, slept-in-his-clothes aspect that'd be nearly unrecognizable if you knew him only by the upright, spit-polished bearing of the onscreen hero. His dog, East, a sweet and slobbery American bulldog, is spread out on a couch in front of the TV. The shelves of his fridge are neatly stacked with much of the world's supply of Bud Light in cans and little else.

On the counter sit a few buckets of muscle-making whey-protein powder that belong to Evans' roommate, Zach Jarvis, an old pal who sometimes tags along on set as a paid "assistant" and a personal trainer who bulked Evans up for his role as the super-ripped patriot in last summer's blockbuster Captain America: The First Avenger. A giant clock on the exposed-brick wall says it's early evening, but Evans operates on his own sense of time. Between gigs, his schedule's all his, which usually translates into long stretches of alone time during the day and longer social nights for the 30-year-old.

"I could just make this . . . disappear," says Josh Peck, another old pal and occasional on-set assistant, in a deadpan mumble, poking at the voice recorder I'd left on the table while I was in the bathroom.

Evans' mom, Lisa, now speaks directly into the microphone: "Don't listen to them—I'm trying to get them not to say these things!"

But not saying things isn't in the Evans DNA. They're an infectiously gregarious clan. Irish-Italians, proud Bostoners, close-knit, and innately theatrical. "We all act, we sing," Evans says. "It was like the fucking von Trapps." Mom was a dancer and now runs a children's theater. First-born Carly directed the family puppet shows and studied theater at NYU. Younger brother Scott has parts on One Life to Live and Law & Order under his belt and lives in Los Angeles full-time—something Evans stopped doing several years back. Rounding out the circle are baby sister Shanna and a pair of "strays" the family brought into their Sudbury, Massachusetts, home: Josh, who went from mowing the lawn to moving in when his folks relocated during his senior year in high school; and Demery, who was Evans' roommate until recently.

"Our house was like a hotel," Evans says. "It was a loony-tunes household. If you got arrested in high school, everyone knew: 'Call Mrs. Evans, she'll bail you out.'"

Growing up, they had a special floor put in the basement where all the kids practiced tap-dancing. The party-ready rec room also had a Ping-Pong table and a separate entrance. This was the house kids in the neighborhood wanted to hang at, and this was the kind of family you wanted to be adopted by. Spend an afternoon listening to them dish old dirt and talk over each other and it's easy to see why. Now they're worried they've said too much, laid bare the tender soul of the actor behind the star-spangled superhero outfit, so there's talk of offing the interviewer. I can hear all this from the bathroom, which, of course, is the point of a good stage whisper.

To be sure, no one's said too much, and the more you're brought into the embrace of this boisterous, funny, shit-slinging, demonstrably loving extended family, the more likable and enviable the whole dynamic is.

Sample exchange from today's lunch of baked ziti at a family-style Italian restaurant:

Mom: When he was a kid, he asked me, 'Mom, will I ever think farting isn't funny?'

Chris: You're throwing me under the bus, Ma! Thank you.

Mom: Well, if a dog farts you still find it funny.

Then, back at the apartment, where Mrs. Evans tries to give me good-natured dirt on her son without freaking him out:

Mom: You always tell me when you think a girl is attractive. You'll call me up so excited. Is that okay to say?

Chris: Nothing wrong with that.

Mom: And can I say all the girls you've brought to the house have been very sweet and wonderful? Of course, those are the ones that make it to the house. It's been a long time, hasn't it?

Chris: Looooong time.

Mom: The last one at our house? Was it six years ago?

Chris: No names, Ma!

Mom: But she knocked it out of the park.

Chris: She got drunk and puked at Auntie Pam's house! And she puked on the way home and she puked at our place.

Mom: And that's when I fell in love with her. Because she was real.

We're operating under a no-names rule, so I'm not asking if it's Jessica Biel who made this memorable first impression. She and Evans were serious for a couple of years. But I don't want to picture lovely Jessica Biel getting sick at Auntie Pam's or in the car or, really, anywhere.

East the bulldog ambles over to the table, begging for food.

"That dog is the love of his life," Mrs. Evans says. "Which tells me he'll be an unbelievable parent, but I don't want him to get married right now." She turns to Chris. "The way you are, I just don't think you're ready."

Some other things I learn about Evans from his mom: He hates going to the gym; he was so wound-up as a kid she'd let him stand during dinner, his legs shaking like caged greyhounds; he suffered weekly "Sunday-night meltdowns" over schoolwork and the angst of the sensitive middle-schooler; after she and his father split and he was making money from acting, he bought her the Sudbury family homestead rather than let her leave it.

Eventually his mom and Josh depart, and Evans and I go to work depleting his stash of Bud Light. It feels like we drink Bud Light and talk for days, because we basically do. I arrived early Friday evening; it's Saturday night now and it'll be sunup Sunday before I sleeplessly make my way to catch a train back to New York City. Somewhere in between we slip free of the gravitational pull of the bachelor pad and there's bottle service at a club and a long walk with entourage in tow back to Evans' apartment, where there is some earnest-yet-surreal group singing, piano playing, and chitchat. Evans is fun to talk to, partly because he's an open, self-mocking guy with an explosive laugh and no apparent need to sleep, and partly because when you cut just below the surface, it's clear he's not quite the dude's dude he sometimes plays onscreen and in TV appearances.

From a distance, Chris Evans the movie star seems a predictable, nearly inevitable piece of successful Hollywood packaging come to market. There's his major-release debut as the dorkily unaware jock Jake in the guilty pleasure Not Another Teen Movie (in one memorable scene, Evans has whipped cream on his chest and a banana up his ass). The female-friendly hunk appeal—his character in The Nanny Diaries is named simply Harvard Hottie—is balanced by a kind of casual-Friday, I'm-from-Boston regular-dudeness. Following the siren song of comic-book cash, he was the Human Torch in two Fantastic Four films. As with scrawny Steve Rogers, the Captain America suit beefed up his stature as a formidable screen presence, a bankable leading man, all of which leads us to The Avengers, this season's megabudget, megawatt ensemble in which he stars alongside Scarlett Johansson, Mark Ruffalo, Robert Downey Jr., and Chris Hemsworth.

It all feels inevitable—and yet it nearly didn't happen. Evans repeatedly turned down the Captain America role, fearing he'd be locked into what was originally a nine-picture deal. He was shooting Puncture, about a drug-addicted lawyer, at the time. Most actors doing small-budget legal dramas would jump at the chance to play the lead in a Marvel franchise, but Evans saw a decade of his life flash before his eyes.

What he remembers thinking is this: "What if the movie comes out and it's a success and I just reject all of this? What if I want to move to the fucking woods?"

By "the woods," he doesn't mean a quiet life away from the spotlight, some general metaphorical life escape route. He means the actual woods. "For a long time all I wanted for Christmas were books about outdoor survival," he says. "I was convinced that I was going to move to the woods. I camped a lot, I took classes. At 18, I told myself if I don't live in the woods by the time I'm 25, I have failed."

Evans has described his hesitation at signing on for Captain America. Usually he talks about the time commitment, the loss of what remained of his relative anonymity. On the junkets for the movie, he was open about needing therapy after the studio reduced the deal to six movies and he took the leap. What he doesn't usually mention is that he was racked with anxiety before the job came up.

"I get very nervous," Evans explains. "I shit the bed if I have to present something on stage or if I'm doing press. Because it's just you." He's been known to walk out of press conferences, to freeze up and go silent during the kind of relaxed-yet-high-stakes meetings an actor of his stature is expected to attend: "Do you know how badly I audition? Fifty percent of the time I have to walk out of the room. I'm naturally very pale, so I turn red and sweat. And I have to literally walk out. Sometimes mid-audition. You start having these conversations in your brain. 'Chris, don't do this. Chris, take it easy. You're just sitting in a room with a person saying some words, this isn't life. And you're letting this affect you? Shame on you.'"

Shades of "Sunday-night meltdowns." Luckily the nerves never follow him to the set. "You do your neuroses beforehand, so when they yell 'Action' you can be present," he says.

Okay, there was one on-set panic attack—while Evans was shooting Puncture. "We were getting ready to do a court scene in front of a bunch of people, and I don't know what happened," he says. "It's just your brain playing games with you. 'Hey, you know how we sometimes freak out? What if we did it right now?'"

One of the people who advised Evans to take the Captain America role was his eventual Avengers costar Robert Downey Jr. "I'd seen him around," Downey says. "We share an agent. I like to spend a lot of my free time talking to my agent about his other clients—I just had a feeling about him."

What he told Evans was: This puppy is going to be big, and when it is you're going to get to make the movies you want to make. "In the marathon obstacle course of a career," Downey says, "it's just good to have all the stats on paper for why you're not only a team player but also why it makes sense to support you in the projects you want to do—because you've made so much damned money for the studio."

There's also the fact that Evans had a chance to sign on for something likely to be a kind of watershed moment in the comic-book fascination of our time. "I do think The Avengers is the crescendo of this superhero phase in entertainment—except of course for Iron Man 3," Downey says. "It'll take a lot of innovation to keep it alive after this."

Captain America is the only person left who was truly close to Howard Stark, father of Tony Stark (a.k.a. Iron Man), which meant that Evans' and Downey's story lines are closely linked, and in the course of doing a lot of scenes together, they got to be pals. Downey diagnoses his friend with what he terms "low-grade red-carpet anxiety disorder."

"He just hates the game-show aspect of doing PR," Downey says. "Obviously there's pressure for anyone in this transition he's in. But he will easily triple that pressure to make sure he's not being lazy. That's why I respect the guy. I wouldn't necessarily want to be in his skin. But his motives are pure. He just needs to drink some red-carpet chamomile."

"The majority of the world is empty space," Chris Evans says, watching me as if my brain might explode on hearing this news—or like he might have to fight me if I try to contradict him. We're back at his apartment after a cigarette run through the Combat Zone.

"Empty space!" he says again, slapping the table and sort of yelling. Then, in a slow, breathy whisper, he repeats: "Empty space, empty space. All that we see in the world, the life, the animals, plants, people, it's all empty space. That's amazing!" He slaps the table again. "You want another beer? Gotta be Bud Light. Get dirty—you're in Boston. Okay, organize your thoughts. I gotta take a piss . . ."

My thoughts are this: That this guy who is hugging his dog and talking to me about space and mortality and the trouble with Boston girls who believe crazy gossip about him—this is not the guy I expected to meet. I figured he'd be a meatball. Though, truthfully, I'd never called anyone a meatball until Evans turned me on to the put-down. As in: "My sister Shanna dates meatballs." And, more to the point: "When I do interviews, I'd rather just be the beer-drinking dude from Boston and not get into the complex shit, because I don't want every meatball saying, 'So hey, whaddyathink about Buddhism?'"

At 17, Evans came across a copy of Hermann Hesse's Siddhartha and began his spiritual questing. It's a path of study and struggle that, he says, defines his true purpose in life. "I love acting. It's my playground, it lets me explore. But my happiness in this world, my level of peace, is never going to be dictated by acting," he says. "My goal in life is to detach from the egoic mind. Do you know anything about Eastern philosophy?"

I sip some Bud Light and shake my head sheepishly. "They talk about the egoic mind, the part of you that's self-aware, the watcher, the person you think is driving this machine," he says. "And that separation from self and mind is the root of suffering. There are ways of retraining the way you think. This isn't really supported in Western society, which is focused on 'Go get it, earn it, win it, marry it.'"

Scarlett Johansson says that one of the things she appreciates about Evans is how he steers clear of industry chat when they see each other. "Basically every actor," she says, "including myself, when we finish a job we're like, 'Well, that's it for me. Had a good run. Put me out to pasture.' But Chris doesn't strike me as someone who frets about the next job." The two met on the set of The Perfect Score when they were teenagers and have stayed close; The Avengers is their third movie together. "He has this obviously masculine presence—a dude's dude—and we're used to seeing him play heroic characters," Johansson says, "but he's also surprisingly sensitive. He has close female friends, and you can talk to him about anything. Plus there's that secret song-and-dance, jazz-hands side of Chris. I feel like he grew up with the Partridge Family. He'd be just as happy doing Guys and Dolls as he would Captain America 2."

East needs to do his business, so Evans and I take him up to the roof deck. Evans bought this apartment in 2010 when living in L.A. full-time no longer appealed to him. He came back to stay close to his extended family and the intimate circle of Boston pals he's maintained since high school. The move also seems like a pretty clear keep-it-real hedge against the manic ego-stroking distractions of Hollywood.

"I think my daytime person is different than my nighttime person," Evans says. "With my high-school buddies, we drink beer and talk sports and it's great. The kids in my Buddhism class in L.A., they're wildly intelligent, and I love being around them, but they're not talking about the Celtics. And that's part of me. It's a strange dichotomy. I don't mind being a certain way with some people and having this other piece of me that's just for me."

I asked Downey about Evans' outward regular-Joe persona. "It's complete horseshit," Downey says. "There's an inherent street-smart intelligence there. I don't think he tries to hide it. But he's much more evolved and much more culturally aware than he lets on."

Perhaps the meatball and the meditation can coexist. We argue about our egoic brains and the tao of Boston girls. "I love wet hair and sweatpants," he says in their defense. "I like sneakers and ponytails. I like girls who aren't so la-di-da. L.A. is so la-di-da. I like Boston girls who shit on me. Not literally. Girls who give me a hard time, bust my chops a little."

The chief buster of Evans' chops is, of course, Evans himself. "The problem is, the brain I'm using to dissect this world is a brain formed by it," he says. "We're born into confusion, and we get the blessing of letting go of it." Then he adds: "I think this shit by day. And then night comes and it's like, 'Fuck it, let's drink.'"

And so we do. It's getting late. Again. We should have eaten dinner, but Evans sometimes forgets to eat: "If I could just take a pill to make me full forever, I wouldn't think twice."

We talk about his dog and camping with his dog and why he loves being alone more than almost anything except maybe not being alone. "I swear to God, if you saw me when I am by myself in the woods, I'm a lunatic," he says. "I sing, I dance. I do crazy shit."

Evans' unflagging, all-encompassing enthusiasm is impressive, itself a kind of social intelligence. "If you want to have a good conversation with him, don't talk about the fact that he's famous" was the advice I got from Mark Kassen, who codirected Puncture. "He's a blast, a guy who can hang. For quite a long time. Many hours in a row."

I've stopped looking at the clock. We've stopped talking philosophy and moved into more emotional territory. He asks questions about my 9-month-old son, and then Captain America gets teary when I talk about the wonder of his birth. "I weep at everything," he says. "I emote. I love things so much—I just never want to dilute that."

He talks about how close he feels to his family, how open they all are with each other. About everything. All the time. "The first time I had sex," he says, "I raced home and was like, 'Mom, I just had sex! Where's the clit?'"

Wait, I ask—did she ever tell you?

"Still don't know where it is, man," he says, then breaks into a smile composed of equal parts shit-eating grin and inner peace. "I just don't know. Make some movies, you don't have to know…"

If someone doesn't want to check the link, the anon sent the full interview!

#chris evans #cevans #Details Magazine #2012 #interview

[stxvercgersslut]

Masterlist 2.0

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[royalwriteroftheuniverse]

Thanks Captain America part 2.....

(Chapter 1) Last chapter/ Next chapter (wanna be added to the tag list message me!)

18+ just incase Steve and Hayden are in this

Mentions of kidnapping angst cheating, angst breakup, angst did I mention angst. Being played. I think thats it

Commenta appreciated reblogs welcome. No reposting or publishing.

Just to recap Steve cheated on you. you found out at a fair you were crying and Hayden (as in Harvard Hottie) had found you crying and you twoo became a thing but Steve never got over you and then you go missing part 1 here

Hayden was worried when you didnt come back that night. The two of you were more than. "Just Friends" he even did a student exchange so he can go to school in the city and be with you. But what terrified him is when you weren't home in the morning he skipped his classes waiting for you to come back. He called your phone sent texts and nothing. The Cops didn't want to hear it. It wasn't 24 hours and maybe you just decided to leave on a trip. Hayden was rolling his eyes. He had tried to explain who your ex boyfriend was but they laughed it off with a "who isn't 'Captain America's' girlfriend."

The next day at dawn you still didn't come home. He was going to go to the tower then and there but he didn't think he'd get far.

He did text his father and call his fathers lawfirm saying his new girlfriend went missing she used to date Caltain America, cops won't take him seriously. But Steve was having trouble letting go. Hayden was truly scared Steve did do something. If he did you'd never be found and he'd get away with murder or worse turning you into some badebment wife kidnapping you never letting you leave. He wouldn't put it past Steve not with how persistent he's been. You never read Steve's messages but Hayden would when he couldn't sleep. Which only made him angry but he needed to know what that so called man was thinking and none of it would have pointed to this.

That night he went to the women's defense class. Hayden had told the woman at check in thst he needed to speak to the instructors his girlfriend came here Tuesday but never came home. Hayden was pale with dark circles and the woman believed him so they were promptly called over. Hayden would've been intimidated if he wasn't so scared for you. He explained or rather rambled that your ex was giving your troubles and he knew this wouldn't be a good idea because he was bound to find you and then Tuesday you never returned home. When he said your name they looked at eachother.

That explains a lot

What?

She told us her ex was bothering her so we asked Steve to come in to help us help her and she just ran out of here.

They called Steve down.

"Whats up?"

He was receiving glances from both Nat and Hill which he didn't quite understand but shrugged it off and his head was tilted a bit with his hands on his hips. Then Nat said

"It's about your ex, the one that was here Tuesday. Shes missing."

Steve's face straightened and his eyes widened while he took a breath almost a gasp in through his closed mouth and went slightly pale."

"When?"

"We just said, Tuesday and as far as we know you were the last person to see her. Your phone."

"What? Why?"

"I won't ask twice Steve." Nat basically commanded

He handed it over knowing what was going to happen next. Nat and Hill noticed Steve's change and it wasn't his typical some one is missing lets go.

"Jesus Christ Steve."

"She said she was taking this class because she was afraid of her ex but...." Hill said looking at the screen as Natasha scrolled.

"Look she was mad at me and she didn't take me seriously a while back whenI said there was a threat but when I left her she was fine."

"So she was walking away?"

"No. Ok look she was crying. She was sitting on the ground crying but she didn't want me around. She didn't believe me about the threat but I-I told her I still had people shadow."

"Steve we stopped that over a month ago why-"

"Because I wanted her to believe me she, she didn't believe a word I said nothing."

"Thats what happens when you say you can't be seen publicly with her and than flaunt another your other girlfriend around at a fair you knew she was going to."

"It wasnt supposed to be like that I- I didn't plan on going the other girl, Rachel had dragged me there saying she just wanted to buy one thing and leave and I insisted on stay-"

"I don't give-"

"I'm not done." Steve practically bellowed at Hayden

"Rachel said she needed help with carying it and next thing I know she's showing me off like a prized dog with two rings on her finger and-"

"And then she saw you ran off crying that hoe I heard her you know, she was crying over you. Rhsts how we met.. You know she never tells anyone who her ex was who hurt her so bad. All she says is her ex."

"I broke up with the - Rachel because of what she did. She showed me off and"

"And MY girl respected your wishes." Hayden spat.

Hearing the words "my girl" from Hayden pissed Steve off. She was HIS girl first. But he knew he had no reason to be pissed it was his fault. And you we now with Hayden.

"You're right. It was my fault I took her for granted I- I met them both around the same time I mean no on talked about being exclusive - but I didn't say at Rachel's place ever I only stayed at....I liked Y/N better I did I just I dont know but I still have everything even the plastic bag that she put all my stuff in. You know I really hoped she kept something but she didn't not even one photo. Steve looked down he was ashamed. He was never like that-he never dated two girls at one and now he lost them both. Not that he cared so much about Rachel that bitch showed him off when she could something he didn't realize until after they broke up but. You, you he kept treasured like a sort of secret mission he kept under lock and key in a safe. A heirloom necklace close to his heart. A dellicate china doll that could break at any time

And if he didn't so that maybe his time wouldn't be divided figuring out who the threat was for, or maybe he w-then it dawned on him. You'd still be with Steve. The others didn't know what came to his mind but his face got even paler as his features stiffened and his jaw ticked.

"Steve what you thinking."

"We need to check the streets for any cameras, reopen the file on the who the threat was from and see if we can chase it down. I want her back."

"She's gone because of you."

"I'm hoping it was a mugging gone bad and she in the hospital otherwise I don't want to think about it."

One thing that ran through Steve's head was Rachel. She wasn't exactly ok with the break up but Steve knew you would've been able to take Rachel in three seconds. There would be no way Rachel knew about you. Steve made sure to keep you two seperate.

Only once a week he'd saw Rachel and the rest he saw you and- and right then he wondered why he even did that. He was with you he slept at your place had clothes a toothbrush his bodywash... no wonder you were so devastated. You thought he was yours. He should've been. He was. He was to dumb to realize. Why the hell was Rachel ever in the picture.

Steve stayed up the whole night there were no videos on the corner where they were. Or even close. Steve hit the table so hard he left a dent.

He went back over the threats the picture the words and he realized it was mostly you. The threats seemed focused on you. He didn't see it before the wording but it made more sense. You were taller than Rachel and the letters reference a hight closeness. Steve realized that originally but there were other

The hair Steve took golden as blonde like Rachel's but golden in the sun. He had looked at thr pictures in his phones his personal and the one he used on missions. your hair was golden in the sun.

There was a comment about music it was thought that maybe it had to do with a location one was at but you sang. And you did a recital near to when they got the note. Just because you hated Steve didn't mean that he wasn't keeping tabs plus he loved your singing he wouldn't have missed the recital even if half the world was in chaos he'd be here with you. He had sent you some roses anonymously. And you had looked so beautiful on stage. He was so proud of you.

You had talked about it for the longest time it would take you 2 semesters to prepare for it. His mind wandered to when you'd reherse and he watch you stop every time you thought your voice faltered a little. He couldn't count the number of time he had told you it was perfect he didn't hear a thing wrong. Languages you didnt know and classical music you didnt like but you lookednso ethereal to him-classical one note said nomething about it being a classic time. Was someone there?

But it was advertised. Around campus and sometimes off. Even Steve had .... he had left a few around the tower thinking just because he didn't want anyone to know you were dating he still wanted to show you off- he was proud of you and that didn't mean people shouldn't get a chance to hear your mqnagnetic voice. That's exactly what Steve was thinking your magnetic voice.

Something about trees and leaves that everyone thought had something to do with Rachel's short stature vs Steve's tall stature and something Steve didn't get but now he realized it was you and Steve had gone to a remote section of a now defunct hiking trail that Steve only knew of from the 40s and would have picnics there under a tree. You'd be so happy to just be able to be outside with Steve he had taken you every chance he got. And you had mentioned one time how you loved the leaves crunching under your feet.

It was you these threats were always about you. They knew about Rachel they had to and didn't care. Then the freaking kidnappers knew Steve cared more for you than Rachel. How big of an idiot was he?

Steve hadn't slept for three days going over everything th threats, the reports of all the shadow agents speaking to them again. But when you were taken it was after they stopped. That was smart Steve was lulled into security and thats when they took you.

Shortly after your anger for Steve subsided you realized your thoughts were more than just from anger... it was the truth...you really never were leaving here. you had just cried. And cried and cried.. Realizing what you said was true you weren't really getting out of there. You had cried and cried. Migraine after migraine pills and tissues were pushed under the door with a note for your migraine. Day after day. You had stopped eating for the most part but you didn't notice.

P.o.v. change

I should've been nicer to Steve maybe. He would come for me. But no one would know. Hayden wouldn't know. Probably think I ghosted him. I paid rent ahead of time. No one would know for months. But if I just forgave Steve I wouldn't be here. Wherever here is. No sun, no clock no nothing. They just seem to turn the lights down and up at what I assume must be day and night.. Steve. I shouldn't even left Steve. Because he'd know I was gone and he would've looked. But he cheated on me. He couldn't even admit it. I dont know what was worse thinking should stay with a cheater to be safe or accepting all the actions and die here. It doesn't matter in the end. Itll be the later no matter what I do. Hopefully otherwise I don't want to know.

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[matchamorphosis]

𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑 𝐎𝐅 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓

𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒗𝒊𝒐𝒖𝒔 𝒅𝒂𝒕𝒆 || 𝒎𝒚 𝒅𝒊𝒂𝒓𝒚 || 𝒏𝒆𝒙𝒕 𝒅𝒂𝒕𝒆

𝒔𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚 ━━ a walk through the city to your apartment leads to a carton of icecream being shared in the comfort of your kitchen. 𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈 ━━ hayden (harvard hottie) × [black//woc]fem!reader 𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 ━━ 18+ hints to nsfw themes, hayden is having an existential crisis, anxiety + stress mention, some kissing, pet names: “Romeo and Juliet”, hayden and reader are hopelessly in love with each other, sexy times not described but still present :p

Her crescent moon smile, it bewitches and twinkles beneath the milky twilight.

It persuades the bright lights of New York City to dim in envy, knowing they can’t face the competition as the darkening hour presents itself. Nothing topped the magnetic attraction you radiated, and nothing topped the feeling of Hayden knowing you were his girl.

“What’s the mood for tonight, Romeo? Raspberry Swirl Cheesecake or chunky Cookie Dough?”

Again, the aspiring law student hears this, and he thinks ‘they both sound good, but you know i’ll choose Cookie Dough over anything.’ although he doesn’t seem to know that you can’t read his thoughts.

Again, the aspiring law student hears this, and he thinks ‘they both sound good, but you know i’ll choose Cookie Dough over anything.’ although he doesn’t seem to know that you can’t read his thoughts.

“Um I dunno, we could have um- cookie dough sounds nice.” Hayden mutters, taking your hand in his so he doesn’t loose you within the growing crowd.

“Cookie Dough it is then.” you grin, secretly hoping he’d say that but your smile doesn’t spread once you notice the tenseness, the drowsiness that soaks him.

Taking a sip from his Americana, his cold one that he doesn’t understand why he’s still holding onto, his mind somehow reverts its attention back to the stresses he thought he’d forgotten an hour ago.

Bitter coats of black coffee lace Hayden’s tongue, you take the coffee cup from his grasps and take a sip from it. Humming at the bitterness, the hints of hazelnut subtle enough for you to take another sip.

“Yum, cold stale coffee. I hope you haven’t been drinking this all day baby.” your remark not overtly concerned but still bearing the protectiveness that Hayden both appreciated and hated.

A droplet of black coffee imprinting at the plumpness of your bottom lip. Hypnotizing the blond as he tries to keep up with your quick feet through the labyrinth that is Fifth Avenue.

The coffee cup in your grasps, you look over your shoulder thoughtlessly. It makes lovesick Hayden taste the black coffee again, makes him swim about it in the simple way your irises entrance the beat of his heart.

Although you think the very same about him, you see everything in him.

He’s so lively, like the night that soaks the cities boulevard of street lamps dripping in their golden dewdrop light.

He’s so enriching, like the street pavement underneath your feet whilst the eyes trace in the clarification in the bronzes and coppers of street lamps.

He’s so vivacious, like the splashing sea in his simple white paper cup that crashes in charcoal waves against the plastic lid.

It seems you’ve willingly walked over the edge and are spiraling down the rabbit hole of complete admiration. Making your body burst in little energy splurges that Hayden struggles to keep up with although it keeps him conscious as a candlestick.

Keeping his mind away from the flaming anxiety, carelessly unaware that it drips in stress— that your wonder boy is dripping in wax.

“Hayden?” the mention of his name doesn’t grab his attention, those caffeine soaked irises and his mind seem to be in another galaxy as he takes his phone out of his pocket.

“Baby?” you speak up and he almost trips on a mossy crack in the concrete, reading the words on the screen that do little to ease him.

“Yeah?” his eyes tears away from his cellphone, there you notice the slight dark bags underneath his blue hues.

He needs to get some sleep, you think. When was the last time he had a full days rest? Had a moment to not worry about LSATs, Law School or his demanding father? Not current enough, to your dissatisfaction.

“I want to make tonight special for you. you’ve been working nonstop for the past few weeks and- I really want you to have one night were you aren’t worry-” you’re cut off with his tired sigh.

“y/n, baby, I would love that. I really would, but I have a full schedule tomorrow to meet up with my advisor and I have to refresh on-”

“And that is all for tomorrow. Tonight is about you.” you interrupt, giving him a smile as you drink again from his coffee as Hayden attempts and fails to steal it back.

“Besides-” you continue, stopping Hayden in his tracks as you stand at the tips of your toes. Warm lips brushing against his ear while your hand traces the ropes of muscle that rope up and down his forearms.

“I have a special treat for the both of us once we’re done with our icecream.” you lick the space of skin beneath his ear before grabbing his hands. The beat of heart pacing now as a crooked smile graces his now cherry face.

“I guess I can’t disagree with you now then,” Hayden stammers, his own hand gliding down to wrap his arm around your waist.

“Nope, you absolutely cannot or i’ll leave you without my touch and you know how well I am with my hands.” smirking, gifting his hand a tender squeeze before your fingers trace his thigh and cup his dick.

Hayden chokes on his spit, heat flushing his face as his eyes look around to hopefully see that nobody noticed. Although all his attention catches is your laughter and your hand pulling him to your side suddenly.

Turning the corner, you and Hayden race across the road pavement of the bustling city. Igniting an adolescent-like rush as you seek out the reason why you both are so lovelorn for each other.

A galaxy of headlights shining like lively stars of white, yellow and orange. Gifting Hayden the taste of liveliness again as he takes your hand in his, the wind moving through your hair as the cars honk behind you two.

However, giving an opportunity for that dark, enriching and vivacious coffee sea to break free from it’s paper cup cage. Creating sticky black puddles to splattered over the faultless canvas that is suddenly Hayden’s blue polo as your feet hit the pavement.

“Oh Romeo, my dear Romeo. You are not having a good day today are you?” you cannot contain your laughter even if it’s not the best at the time.

Hayden throws you a tamed glare and an irritated eye roll, although he still doesn’t let go of your hand. The powdered blue is stained like his milk white teeth, possessing a yellow tint from drinking it continuously.

One thing you know about your wonder boy is that he religiously partakes in his caffeine consumption when the sun rises in the shape of a lemon slice to bruising as a pink peach as it sets.

Some remains of the coffee stick like honey on his hands, irritation sparks but so does exhaustion from the endless hours of studying in the small coffee-shop across Central Park.

Bundles of civilians pass you both, possessing faces different the next yet bearing their own colorfully unique auras. Filling the sidewalk atmosphere with chatter and soles of shoes against the pavement.

Like muscle memory, his fingers twine through the delicate petals of pink and purple azalea bushes as the grip weaved within yours tightens a slight. The symphony of the theater close by can be heard softly as well as the applauding encore afterwards.

The incoming taxi cabs rushing past blare the music in the radio, and the sweet and savory smells of the near asian cuisine restaurants fill Hayden’s senses of sight, sound, and smell — It’s comforting.

Manhattan, Hayden’s city — which he considers to be his only home, layers in so many simple complexities. Although they all go along sourly with the obnoxious buzzing of his cellphone in his back pocket— and still, Hayden ignores it just like the other missed calls from his pressing father.

He’ll stop calling me sometime tonight, Hayden reasons. Remembering the very familiar path of flower plants in the simple columns along the white stone sidewalks.

“You want me to kiss your bad, terrible, no good day better?” whether it was another tease or you were really being serious, Hayden steals a swift yet tranquil kiss.

Coming to no surprise to him that the tension so thick in his head and chest clears away just a bit. Similar to sunlight peeking through the retreating storm clouds of a foggy afternoon, spotting a bit of blue sky behind the gray canvas.

“There, i’m all better— On the other hand...” Hayden pauses as he pretends to figure out what else to say, either way it’s making your attention quirk in curiosity.

“I really think I need something stronger. A peck just won’t cover me. I mean I’ve been studying all day without any kisses from you and I spilt coffee on my favorite shirt. There has to be something else you could give me to make my day better, don’t you think so Juliet?” he whispers in your ear as his large hands cup your hips.

“Come back with a note from your doctor Romeo. Otherwise, this pharmacy is closed.” you playfully roll your eyes, smiling at the fake blow Hayden emphasis although not minding the tight squeeze he gives to your ass.

“You really know how to break my heart into two don’t you baby? Do I have to beg you to kiss it better this time?” he smirks in your ear, catching the familiar silver pool of the the lobby of your apartment a few feet away.

“Oh please, the only way you get anything from me is begging wonder boy—” you pause, looking up at him with a smile Hayden can recognize only as pure mischief. “— i’m not expecting anything less when you get this whiny and needy.” smirking with a quick tug at his belt, seeing the tent in his pants become very noticeable.

It makes Hayden pout, a genuine pout that makes you foo as you pinch his cheek. “I’m not being needy and whiny. I’m just tired- and I just need a little—” Hayden stammers, trying to soothe the sudden lust swimming through his body.

“You’re going through the stage of denial Romeo. Don’t you worry, Juliet is here to make sure you get fucked really good.” you smirk whilst guiding Hayden who is bearing a blush three shades deeper than before? into the lobby of your building.

“Before or after our icecream?” he plays along, his fingers playing with the charms of your bracelet.

Even in the moment where other people join the elevator, instinctively giving space between each other, you still feel his gaze weighting upon you after flittering his eyes somewhere else.

“You’ll find out soon enough.” you whisper, and with the ding of the elevator reaching your floor, you and Hayden step off.

Excusing yourselves and exchanging good byes to the people you know, you both stepped out of the elevator and slowly walk a respective distance from each other down the hallway.

However, when the moment the elevator door closed, did you burst in a fit of giggles and playful scream as Hayden wrapped you up in his arms suddenly.

The pace of giggles and messy kisses to your apartment not conservative whatsoever to anyone of your elderly and rather nosy neighbors but you two did bring a sense of youthful liveliness.

You yourself practically radiating all the romantic temptation you’re currently yearning for as Hayden wraps his thick arms around your waist.

“Can we skip the icecream?” Hayden whispers in your ear, his fingers playing again with the charms of your bracelet before they glide underneath the cloth of your halter top.

“And mess up our tradition? We always eat a carton of icecream together on Tuesdays.” you whine, bitting your glossy bottom lip a bit at the drag of his fingers underneath the waistline of your maxi skirt.

Thrumming his fingers along the exposed skin of your belly in patience as you try to find the key to your apartment on your keychain that bares more shiny trinkets than keys. Wet kisses being gifted to you on your jaw and neck, “There’s nothing wrong with changing things up. It’s normal, and besides lots of good things happen on Tuesdays besides icecream.”

He smirks into your shoulder once you finally open your apartment, settling your things as you lock the door behind you.

Hayden watches your figure, parting from your shoes and ruffling your hair before making your way to the kitchen. The blond follows right behind you as you open the freezer. “That is totally not so, icecream is the best thing we do together on Tuesdays.”

“Is it though?” Hayden presses, a shit eating grin crossing his boyish features that almost makes your inside flutter. “I remember our Tuesday traditions differently.” he drawls as he watch’s you take out the ice cream carton of chunky cookie dough.

Although Hayden contemplates his own plans for tonight that don’t involve the sweet you’re digging into with a silver spoon. “Okay and what are you referring to? The icecream or the lap dances?” you press as you lean over the island, not breaking the contact you both know will lead to noisy but stress relieving sex.

“C’mon baby you always give me the best lap dance!” Hayden laughs as his fingers play with the curly locks of hair that lay on the soft rich skin of your exposed back.

“I’m not saying we forget about our carton of Cookie Dough but I am saying that maybe it’s perfectly alright to shake up our tradition.” his knuckles tracings the outlines of your back before his hands take their place on their hips, rubbing them to feel the delicious curve in his grasps.

Sucking on your skin, his teeth grazing the delicate spot above your paving jugular. “What do you say Juliet?” his tone so light and airy, leaving room for you to answer but all he receives are whimpers when his hands massage the plumpness of your ass.

A pair of warm, coffee drunk lips graze the sensitive skin of your neck just right as he closes the freezer door. Intending on making this shift in tradition worth it for you, Hayden intends on making you feel worthy of every chance he makes.

you’re deserving and worthy of every one.

You find comfort in the scent of roasted coffee beans etched on his skin from sitting in the coffee shop for hours, you spoon a good enough chunk of cookie dough and vanilla into Hayden’s mouth.

The both of you are wrapped up within each other, a carton of icecream in between you both as you scoop from it every other minute. The flow of the city scape present in your window as you both watch another round of Legally Blonde.

Despite Hayden saying it isn’t realistic and whispering insult after insult under his breath whenever Warner appears on screen, you know he enjoys it just as much as you when he laughs at the jokes.

“I cannot believe the universe blessed us with this much cookie dough in one carton.” you whispered and Hayden laughs at that.

The soothing sound pairing better with his rosy fingers creeping up underneath your baggy sleeping shirt— well, it’s technically his since he keeps a few clothes at your place.

“I think the universe knew we both needed a break. Glad she’s being considerate.” he smiles as his eyes travel back to the tv, watching Elle Woods arriving to the the supposed costume party and witnessing her heart being once again broken at the hands of Warner Huntington in her playboy bunny outfit.

“What a pretentious little ass-prick.” he scoffs at the screen, you quirk your brow at him as you take another scoop of icecream.

“Ass-prick?” you giggle and Hayden rolls his eyes, a smile pulling at his lips when you laugh at the new found insult. “What is that a bridge word between asshole and dickhead that also alludes to a dildo?” you series of laughs make Hayden raise to his own defense.

“Well, yeah I guess! There’s so much I wanna say but people like this ass-prick really leave you looking for new words to describe how much an ass-prick they are. Trust me, babe, I know. I met so many of ‘em at Harvard and i’m gonna have to encounter them again sooner or later.”

You laughter died down, noticing how much his mood has deflated now. Licking the creamy vanilla off your spoon as you suck down on a chocolate chip in thought, you continue looking his way. In a way that he knows that you’re asking for permission to ask what’s wrong.

Hayden takes another spoon of icecream, looking from the tv screen then at his phone that’s resting at the coffee table with your fashion magazines and panties. Then, slowly at you, who holds his hand as he rests his head against the couch cushion.

“I’m not even sure with myself if I want to go to Law School. I just considered it a top priority to please my dad. I mean when you’re only parental figure wants you to become a certain person you try your best to fit into that mold.”

You listen, after the pauses in his sentences, you know from experience that Hayden is not someone who likes to keep his feeling bottled up in front of you.

“I’ve been pleasing him since I was a kid and I still seeked out his approval when he was observing my every move when I was an undergrad.”

The dizziness and pressurizing sensation that appeared when he walked the busy streets and smooth sidewalks of Manhattan returns back in his chest slowly.

What benefit does he give himself in shoving them down, Hayden thinks. He’s been shoving and pushing and running away from his own goals just to chase something he might never receive.

It makes him overthink his own theories that clash with his fathers unwanted destiny: if to pursue Law or to not pursue Law.

The comfort that was the quiet living room playing Legally Blonde gets louder and louder; a distraction but a helpful one that helps Hayden grounds his senses to the present. Of who he wants to be and what he wants to be without his father gravitating his final thought.

Then he realizes, that no matter where he’ll be, it’s just another step in his path to finding his purpose.

what’s the rush? what’s the consequence of being so uncertain about the meaning of your existence?

should there be a rush? should he be worrying his mind off until he can’t sleep and find a thought of clarity?

It doesn’t seem so once he promises himself he’ll call his father on his decision. It’s turning into mist once you show him all the practice tests you’ve graded with those high marks. It’s completely disappeared once you kissed him, telling him he’ll be alright.

Those cupid bows always found a home when they molded against his mouth. A confectionary sensibility a-raising when you would taste the coffee of his tongue and he the strawberry lipgloss smoothed sweetly on your lips.

It’s a sort of kiss that has the power to cease all the anxieties building up in his chest and your own fingers trace the vanilla icecream stains on his shirt till his heart beats underneath the skin of your fingers.

The kind of kiss that starts and ends so shortly, although designed to crave another taste all the same.

It leaves him intoxicated off you and from the sweetness from the chunk of cookie dough you dug up with his shiny spoon. All remains of that dizzy feeling are replaced with the warmth of your fingers through his hair, you always knew the right spots that made him turn into putty in your hands.

Hayden promises himself he won’t ever be your Warner.

There is nothing better and no one more significant that he could substitute you for in his life. The growing sensation of dependence clouds his heart, a dangerous feeling considering how you both haven’t ever spoken about the status of whatever this confusing intimacy is.

Hayden hasn’t once heard you call him his boyfriend; he hasn’t once called you his girlfriend. All the twinkles that added happiness to this cluster of complex constellations of your relationship must have a meaning even when you both aren’t certain where you align.

is there meaning?

That thought breaks to a stop once he feels your head on his shoulder, eyes drowsy and glossed with sleepiness. Those shiny curls of yours framing the dewiness of your face in their divine disarrayed way, your fingers reaching to interlock with his.

And he can’t help but squeeze back, and he can’t help by pull you closer to his side.

maybe there is.

♡♡♡ thank you for reading! ♡♡♡ pretty please like, reblog and comment what you think and if you enjoy this follow my library blog to be notified of my future works! ♡♡♡

#✿ — rosie posie writes! #harvard hottie × fem!reader #harvard hottie × black!reader #harvard hottie × woc!reader #harvard hottie fluff #chris evans × fem!reader #chris evans × black!reader #chris evans × woc!reader #chris evans fluff #harvard hottie smut #chris evans angst

[matchamorphosis]

𝑏𝑎𝑏𝑦, 𝑖𝑡’𝑠 𝑐𝑜𝑙𝑑 𝑜𝑢𝑡𝑠𝑖𝑑𝑒

━━━━━➛ 𝐿𝑖𝑓𝑒 𝑖𝑠 𝑎 𝑏𝑜𝑥 𝑜𝑓 𝑠𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑤𝑏𝑒𝑟𝑟𝑦 𝑏𝑜𝑛 𝑏𝑜𝑛𝑠, 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑖𝑡’𝑠 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑡ℎ 𝑙𝑖𝑣𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑎 𝑝𝑒𝑟𝑠𝑜𝑛 𝑦𝑜𝑢’𝑟𝑒 ℎ𝑎𝑝𝑝𝑦 𝑠ℎ𝑎𝑟𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑚 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ.

𝑠𝑢𝑚𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑦 — it’s a tradition between you and Hayden that you both spend the day after Christmas with each other until winter break is over. this year, things don’t go precisely by tradition.

𝑔𝑒𝑛𝑟𝑒 — fluffy fluff. 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑑 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑡 — 2.1K 𝑑𝑖𝑣𝑖𝑑𝑒𝑟 — @firefly-graphics

𝑝𝑎𝑖𝑟𝑖𝑛𝑔 — hayden brown (harvard hottie) + woc!reader

𝑤𝑎𝑟𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠 — fluff. reader doesn’t celebrate Christmas but she and Hayden give each other presents in celebration of winter break. :) slight angst because reader is feeling lonely. bit of cry. also! I gave Hayden a last name, not mines tho :/

𝑤.𝑛𝑜𝑡𝑒𝑠 — everybody thank malia for this little oneshot and the moodboard she gave me that motivated me to write this. hope you guys enjoy reading, don’t forget to reblog and give feedback! ⛄️

𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑠 — · m.masterlist. · library acc. · my taglist.

December’s day in Maine, it glosses over your eyes that look out of the window — A soft powder of fluffy snow sprinkles on top of you, the delicate snowflakes entwining within your hair and lashes.

The far away sounds of the television downstairs broadcasting another round of christmas cartoons pulls you into a hollow state. Pulling the thick quilt closer to keep warm, a restless gaze etches on your dewy features that still search for the man with the glowing halo for hair to arrive.

Time has been slipping through the ancient wood of your family's country villa like the flour you’ve incorporated in the cinnamon rolls flaked with cinnamon and sugar.

The same soon-to-be frosted treats are still tucked away in the oven; however, it would be a travesty to have them be ready before Hayden would arrive. It was another little disappointment that Hayden wasn’t there to make them with you like you always do together but it kept your mind off of this when you baked.

At this moment you anticipate the moment between you both where you sit on the carpet, plates of cinnamon rolls and chocolate chip cookies surrounding you two as you hand each other gift after gift.

It certainly wouldn’t be a special break from your usual day to day life as a student to not spend the sacred days dedicated to hot chocolate, holiday cartoons and sweater cuddles if your boyfriend was here to do at least one of those things with you.

A flash of golden headlights trails through the dense fields of aromatic maple and pine trees near the tall villa, your heart leaps out of your chest at the sight that your Hayden is finally here.

The smile that hasn’t been seen for days now gracing your lips, “He’s finally here,” the warmth of your breath showing in the air from those joyful words.

You’re quick to tuck your head back inside the warm house and close the window, ruffling your hands through your hair to shake the snowflakes away as you giggle and shuffle through the room.

Oh, you could just imagine it now, you think with every rushful step you take down the stairs: The serene painting of you and Haydens legs entwined together, playing storyteller about hilarious incidents after unbelievable stories that have occured during his Christmas with his family.

The swiftness you possess almost makes you slip down the last step although you hold the quilt tighter around your shoulders. What a dream that would be, what a dream this day is going to become, you have it all played out.

Hardcover books you’ve mentioned in convenient conversations within your light grasps before a gasp escapes you from the sight. A handful of cassette tapes in a wrapped shoebox big enough to be a house for a mouse, bearing every song he loves.

Quick hands put on your winter boots, hands move your tousled hair out of your face as you open the door to the swirling wind and walk through the powdered sugar covered terrace. Making you think how sweet his lips would taste after hayden would help himself to a third cup of peppermint tea along with one cinnamon roll more.

The welcomed chill enveloping you like the stitched quilt around your body that pumps in anticipation, oh how this weather makes you eager to see Hayden’s reactions to his knitted scarf and sweater you crocheted for him.

Would he try it on immediately? Take off whatever he had on and let it wrap him up? — you think as your footsteps take you from the porch to the sidewalk, looking for his beamer he insisted was a vintage through the last rays of sunlight for the day.

A shiver and whisper of chill not touching you with Hayden’s Harvard hoodie you gave you some few years ago, fingers instinctively feel through the fabric.

Would he run his fingers through the hours spent stitches? Feel the material in between his fingers and touch each pattern? — you think again as your head turns to meet the forest around you, looking for those golden headlights to appear once again.

Step after energized step, you dig your boots into the snow and keep walking until the villa is behind you. The music of winter’s elements play in a hidden chorus within the trees and snow covered bushes. Leading you to wonder what Hayden would think about your little cards you snuck in each cassette tape you’ve made for him.

Each one summarizing every emotion you feel when he’s around you. Some silly tapes that Hayden insisted aren’t silly at all, of what it feels like to hold his hand and what it feels like when his hands comb through your hair.

Whipping your head about in another search, perplexment is now etched on your features. Shouldn’t he be here by now? you thought but your confusion is distracted when you look towards the snowman you and your younger family members made.

It’s crooked smile of little cobblestones and the bright orange carrot that’s probably been nibbled on by some local deer for his nose. It makes you smile a bit but then you remember with a frosty blow of the wind.

Where could Hayden be? — your heart sorrowfully waltz at the question, covered shoulders once straight slump with languish and worry.

Is it the traffic? Is it snowing hard that the flight was cancelled? Did his car break down?

Did you imagine the headlights? Were you just so desperate to see him that you conjured up the sight of whatever that reminded you of him?

Those spiraling questions make you anxiously pick at the knitted ends of the quilt, the skin of your face and hands becoming intolerant to the freezing temperatures now that the sun is tucked away under the blanket of starry skies.

You kiss it goodnight, trying your best to ignore the tears in your eyes and the pouring snowflakes that have stuck to your wetting lashes. Trying your best to hide them from yourself, even on a special day like this where you’re afraid of crying in front of a snowman with a crooked smile will spoil everything.

A terrible tremble shakes your bottom lip, a palette of white breath joins the twilight sky as you let out a little sob.

The confectionary warmth you’re yearning for is becoming too much for you to cope with, even the sun blazing inside your heart that keeps you patient and hopeful is starting to dim away in anguish.

Maybe he’ll call soon and update you on where he is, hearing his voice will be enough to soothe and bring comfort to your longing state. Wiping the hot tears that wet your cheeks with the sleeve of your sweater you take a moment to admire the self-regulation with the company of your snowman, mysterious trees and the silver speckled stars.

Snow continues to pour above you, fluffy and soft like powdered sugar, making you feel like those sweet strawberry bonbons Hayden’s aunts would send you.

A knot in your belly tightens a bit but in anticipation, pinning for the custom of being you sitting on the large loveseat in his lap, wrapped in the same persian quilt you have on.

A book of literature collections of your favorite poets Hayden purchased from his trip in Massachusetts you read whilst he listens to the cassette tapes and sketches in the drawing pad you give him.

Snuggling closer to his soft figure as his free arm wraps you tight, almost securing the fact that you're here with him. The bonbon box between you both as you momentarily feed each other one after the other until the box that was once filled with the pink treats disappear.

Evidence of your consumptions plastered on your pink cream lips. Both of you holding onto the flavor of the moment with every lick of your lips, with every squeeze of your interlocked hands, with every kiss you give.

A rush of wind embraces you and you figure it’s best you get inside before you catch a cold, eyes captured by the moonlight look up to the stars.

Whispering a kind goodnight before booping the carrots edge of the snowman's nose, “Goodnight to you too.”

Pulling the quilt closer to you, you shift your heels against the snow to head straight back inside. Despite Hayden not being here today to share the last few days together before winter break ends you know that whatever time he does spend with you, will not be appreciated and loved any less.

“Is it too late to wish me goodnight?” a familiar voice speaks behind you.

Familiar in a way that you gasp and turn around, a hand covering your mouth once you see the man you haven’t seen since September. Apricot sap hair catching the snowflakes that fall, his boyish smile shy and sweet as he holds a bouquet of your favorite flowers in his hands.

“You’re here.” your words barely a whisper, soft and airy with a shade of astonishment. The same tears in your eyes emerge and Hayden is quick to walk closer to you and whip them away with the caress of his thumb.

“With you baby, I’m here with you. I’m so sorry it took so long for me to get here.” Hayden softly whispers as he leans down to brush your forehead against his, taking your face in his mitten hands.

At this silver moment, you’re wondering if you’re dreaming with every step he gets closer to you and beaming at the smile you’ve barely thought you’d see today. Those blue eyes you were so used to seeing everyday pouring like starlight into your heart, filling it up with his gentle admiration and warmth.

“I know I called you and said that I would arrive this morning but the weather had other plans. I hope you could forgive me sweetheart.” his voice seeks your approval, one of his hands root themselves in your hair as the other still holds your face.

“It’s alright, don’t worry it’s alright. I’m just so happy you’re here!” you’re smiling, teary-eyed with joy and taking his face in your chilled hands.

Beaming those teeth when Hayden chuckles at how cold your fingers are as you count every freckle on his nose and cheeks. A bashful sensation spreads through your heated cheeks when Hayden hands you your bouquet with a wink.

“For my prettiest flower, I offer these to you.” you’re practically melting from his sweetness, taking the flowers into your hands. Although, it’s cleared away when he carries you up in his arms so your face is mere centimeters away from his.

“I couldn’t waste a day of our week without seeing my girl. Even if I had to drive here from Manhattan—”

“Baby you drove here from Manhattan?” your voice pitched in shock as you cut him mid-sentence and it just makes him laugh louder.

“Yep, that’s exactly what I did. And do you know what I’d do?” he asked and you can just see the spark of mischief in his spinning copper blue eyes.

“What would you do wonder boy?” you asked him right back, staring from his eyes to his lips back to his eyes.

“I’d do it again, a hundred times all over. Again and again. Just so I can see you and hold you in my arms.”

A symphony of ballads thrum Hayden’s heartstrings, of only you knew how well you make his heart sing with the slightest of ease. How well you turn him into your instrument of delight with just a kiss, it makes him lean forward to feel that addictive flutter in his chest.

“Again and again. I’ll be wherever you want me to be.” his words smother your lips, butter you up and you pull his lips to yours.

The snow still pours and you’re still in his arms, the knitted mittens on his hands holding yours tighten when he unexpectedly swings you. Encouraging every hearty laugh to slip whilst his mount still presses sweetly against yours.

“Hayden Brown! Hayden Brown, if you don’t stop spinning we’re both going to fall over!” you shriek with every bit of caution, holding your arms tighter around his neck his laughter getting contagious.

“That’s the point sweetheart!” he hollers, spinning you and him faster and faster that the sun might as well rise up and the moon hide away for the day.

Faster then slower, agile and clumsily, until feet fall over the snow, collapsing you both against the thick blankets of snow around you. You both come down, messy kisses breaking the moments of laughter between you both.

“Baby, it’s cold outside. Let’s go inside, you’re turning into a snowman.” you giggle at Hayden’s crooked grin, pressing a quick kiss to his cheeks to warm them up.

“Yeah let’s do that. I can really go for tea, did you make those cinnamon rolls? I know I tell you this all the time but I really love when you bake.” the cold makes you both jittery but you both press your mouths against each others for that delicious warmth.

“Whatever we love, we mention the most.” you whisper, your fingers brushing the delicate snowflakes from his hair, tracing the lineage of his handsome face.

“Then I must love you too much because I mention you all the time.” he whispers, taking your hands back into his own. Those rose petal lips kiss your knuckles, and suppose it’s your turn again to feel your heart ping by Cupid’s bow.

Wait— aren’t the cinnamon rolls still in the oven?

Shuffling back up on your feet, you race to the house. Almost forgetting Hayden is laying in the snow, confusion plastered over his Rudolph the red nose rain deer face. “Let me guess! You forget the rolls in the oven again!”

“Maybe!” you shout back as you reach the porch, hearing Hayden catching up with you. Racing to the kitchen to salvage this years cinnamon rolls.

Although, you both don’t mind the burnt treats because out of all the usual arrangements, almost burning down the house is one that continues to be within the cards.

#♡⃗ : rosie writes. #hayden (harvard hottie) #harvard hottie fluff #harvard hottie × black!reader #harvard hottie × woc!reader #harvard hottie × fem!reader #chris evans fluff #chris evans × fem!reader #chris evans × black!reader #chris evans × woc!reader