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izzy-b-hands · 1 year

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"No," Jackie shakes her head. "You are in charge, Ed. You and Roach."

"Yeah, but Stede-"

Jackie rests a hand on his shoulder. "I don't want any genitals or genital pirates in my kitchen. Jackie doesn't fuck with the health code."

Ed tries to nod along. "Right, but Stede won't be-"

"Have fun, be safe, and if you destroy my business," Jackie smiles and kisses Ed's cheek. "I'll destroy you."

"Don't know that I'd hate that," Ed admits. "If the destruction might go down the way I think it would..."

She laughs and slaps his ass on the way out, suitcase in hand.

They can do this. It's like a trial run for his own restaurant, sort of. And he does owe Jackie a favor (though what pirate doesn't at this point, he could also argue.)

But he never would, because he's as excited as he is anxious, standing in the empty bar that for the few weeks they're there, will be Blackbeard's Bar and Grill and Souvenirs.

"How the fuck are we behind on garnish?" Ed snaps. "It's leaves, more or less! Just put them on the plate!"

"And ruin the entire plating?" Izzy scoffs. "Ed!"

"Stop being extra fussy and please just put them on the plate," Ed sighs and reaches for the bundle of cilantro himself.

"People don't even like cilantro that much," Pete adds as he passes by to drop another order (written hastily by the combo front of house team that Stede, Lucius, and Frenchie have become.)

"We're running behind!" Roach shouts. "I have lamb ready to go, so the garnish and sauce had-"

Izzy dodges past Ed with a couple of ready plates, and he takes the moment to breathe.

It is chaos. It really is. But the kitchen smells amazing and the food that's going out looks good.

They can do this. They can actually do this.

He can do this.

"He's asking for another discount," Lucius groans. "Because, and I quote-"

Lucius rolls his eyes so hard it looks like they might roll out and away across the floor. "You left a hole in his life. Get it, Ed? Because the cannonball left a hole in his-"

"Oh my god," Ed interrupts with a growl, midway through tasting the first dessert to go out. "He's been here all lunch AND dinner service like this, and I'm literally not charging him for anything."

"He's been paying for things anyway," Lucius pulls a random assortment of coins from his pocket. "Like, just handing me some more at random whenever I walk by. Do you want to cut him off...or..."

Ed gently pushes the first finished desserts tray towards him. "Tell him he's helping test this part of the menu for free."

"We literally have been packed ever since lunch," Lucius says. "I think we know the menu works."

"Not this bit of it," Ed protests. "Besides, I used to make some of these for him when we sailed together. He's drunk, right?"

"That feels like asking me if the sun is warm."

"Right, so he'll be even happier with a bunch of comfort food in front of him," Ed continues. "You've got this, go on!"

"Could slap my ass to really motivate m-"

He only taps Lucius' ass, aware he might be taking the joke a step too far, prepared to apologise and step back.

Lucius grins. "Slap it harder next time and I'll even sit and talk with Jack to keep him out of the lobster tank."

Ed blinks. "What. Wait, Lucius, people choose from those to eat, what did Jack-"

The tray is up and he watches Lucius dart back out to the dining area in a beeline to Jack's table.

"He probably just took a bunch out to set free," Izzy says in between helping plate desserts. "Someone go check the outhouse, please."

"Wh-" The Swede is the first to pause in his work, keeping a fruit reduction from burning on the heat. "Why would they be there?"

"Because why not," Izzy snorts. "It's Jack."

"Does he actually care about setting them free?" Pete interjects as he whizzes by to snag a few finished plates. "Ed, boss, important question, what is this dessert here and is there enough for us after? Or maybe you need help tasting the next batch-"

"I'm saving enough for everyone, and you'll find out then," Roach interrupts as he finishes the main portion of another plate. "I haven't helped run a kitchen like this in ages and I have a system for saving some food and it's working! Get out before you ruin it!"

"Excuse me for being hungry!" Pete snaps.

"We're all hungry," Ed says gently. "Pete, how many more tables left?"

"Like ten," he replies miserably. "We just started serving dessert, you know that."

"Here," Ed sets a dish of the pudding aside and snags a spoon. "Take a moment and eat a little. But you have to wait and have the rest of the courses with all of us."

Pete wraps him in a hug, face smashed into Ed's chest. "One of them told me his drink tastes like piss."

"Does it?" Ed asks as he pats Pete's back.

"Yeah. He'd been an asshole all night, so Wee John called Jack over to the bar because he said to get him if anyone wasn't respecting us and he-"

"Yeah," Ed sighs and makes a note to ask Jack not to piss in the drinks of other customers, no matter how irritating they may be. Or at least to wait until they'd paid and save it for the last drink before they left. "It's okay. People suck, but we know you, Fang, and Ivan have been doing your best out there serving. Let me take your current order out, and you just eat."

"I'm saying it tastes like piss," the pirate growls. "And I'm not fucking paying."

"Interesting choice to make," Ed nods, picks up a plate of cake, and smashes it into the man's face as hard as he can. "Anyway, Lucius will process your final bill and be over with that shortly! If you have any other questions about your meal tonight-"

"We're good," the man's companion squeaks. "Thank you for the dinner service, Blackbeard sir."

"You're welcome," Ed smiles. "Tips aren't necessary, but they are appreciated by our front of house and serving staff!"

A handful of coins is shoved into his hand, well over what their meals cost even with a tip, before the companion dashes off into the night.

"I'll send Buttons over for you," Ed says to the pirate groaning and bleeding all over the tablecloth, head resting on the shards of the plate. "He's part of our security and sourcing team."

"Sourcing?" the pirate whimpers.

"Meat for the menu has to come from somewhere," Ed grins and slaps the man's back before walking back to the kitchen.

Buttons probably won't actually slice and dice the man up, but then again....well. Roach himself had said it, meat was meat, and since Jack was leaving them short on lobster...

"That was exhausting," Stede lifts his glass of wine as he stands from the head of their shoved together tables. "Almost everyone I spoke to was demanding and rude. I think...I think I hated it. But at the same time, I'm ready to do it again tomorrow."

"That's just customer service and food service especially, mate," Frenchie says, already sipping from his own glass. "And, if I'm honest? Sort of how it was dealing with you at first."

Stede nods. "That explains so many dinners...well. Anyway, the important thing is we survived! And did well, or so I'm told."

"We broke even and then some," Ed says. "And added seven more noses to the Nose Jar!"

"We're about to eat, can we please not talk about the nose jar right now?" Jim asks. "Especially since Olu and I were the ones to get in there and-"

"Ahhh that's enough," Stede's face pales. "Ed. To you. To a new, if temporary adventure. To-"

A lobster sails across the room and smacks him square in the face.

Ed tells himself not to laugh, but he can't help it.

"Ed," Stede says tensely. "Olu. Jim. Everyone, actually. I have an idea about banning problem customers, and that we might try it on-"

"He gave the lobster back at least," Ed giggles.

The tension folds into the moment of silence, and he worries Stede might actually be upset.

"He did," Stede shakes his head. "Out of seven, but yes, he did. I'm going to call that the end of my toast for my sake and the lobsters."

Stede sits and they finally get a chance to dig in themselves.

Some of the leftovers are a little cold. There's not as much sauce leftover for any of the dishes as Ed had been hoping there would be.

But everyone is quiet, happy, and eating like they've never been fed before, and that's even better than seeing the paying customers devour it.

#text post #long post #spoiler alert the lobsters are fine and not hidden in the outhouse #this is another v silly one but i had fun with it #might dabble again and write a few more bits and bobs for this #i just like writing ed happy even if slightly overhelmed in the kitchen #i tried to include bits of what each crew member would be doing for this but that's a fluid thing skdnfkg #at least for most of them but roach and ed will probably always be the Gordon Ramsays in the kitchen staying in that area #that way if they head out to the dining area u know Something Is Gonna Go Down and probably an asshole customer taken care of #Jackie will never tell Ed that her vacation is actually just her watching how he's doing from an inn nearby #bc she thinks he might enjoy it as retirement and then SHE would get to retire with her husbands #while taking a small monthly cut from the total restaurant earnings as the original founder

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sonic-adventure-3 · 2 years

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the sonic music fan to jungle fan pipeline is so real

#well. not quite accurate i was listening to a little bit of dnb and dabbling in breakcore before sonic but post sonic i am obsessed #rhythm and balance for white jungle being literally jungle is honestly great to me #AND FRONTIERS’ SOUNDTRACK! LOTTA THE CYBERSPACE MUSIC IS STRAIGHT JUNGLE #once the frontiers soundtrack officially drops i desperately need to make a playlist of sonic jungle #thank you fumie kumatani and jun senoue and tomoya ohtani for my life #rambles #the fact that the doom isn’t on the official shadow soundtrack is gonna kill me though DONT WITHHOLD IT FROM ME SEGA

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jisoirs · 2 years

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ion think i said this but i stan blackpink, loona, wjsn, fx, & red velvet. my ults are yeojin & jisoo 🧡🧡

#i WILL force blackpink into my stories someway every. single. time.#i also dabble in a bit of txt (beomgyu)#gonna use a yeojin fc soon.... soon

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lettherebemonsters · 2 years

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Guess who's hoooome!

#Gonna be on in a bit but if anyone that dabbles in the Boys wants to poke me go ahead #Gonna add Gunpowder as a muse but be heavily canon divergent #rave to the grave (out of character)

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abyssruler · 10 months

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roses are red, violets are blue, lynette is so done with the two of you

lyney x gn!reader

lynette thinks fontaine’s worst kept secret isn’t how neuvillette wears blue underwear or how the hydro archon loves a good drama, no, fontaine’s worst kept secret is lyney’s massive crush on you and how everyone and their grandmother know except you.

comedy, pining lyney, lynette being so done

Lyney’s frowning.

Most people would find it an odd expression on him, used to having him direct dazzling smiles and playful laughter their way. But Lynette isn’t just anyone, and the sight of Lyney frowning is hardly a rare phenomenon within the privacy of their household.

Freminet’s usually Lyney’s choice of victim for whatever nonsense he’s managed to build himself up in that head of his, but Freminet’s busy doing errands and Lynette is unfortunately the only person within vicinity that Lyney trusts with his secret—which isn’t even a secret by this point, people have been making bets on how long it would take you to realize that Lyney’s been pining over you since forever.

Case in point: Lyney frowning over two identical flowers. She doesn’t need to be a mind reader to know that her brother is having a midlife crisis over which flower to give you.

Lynette thinks he should just man up and confess. Preferably within the next week or so, otherwise she’d lose her bet.

“Lynette, which one is more eye-catching, the crimson one,” he holds up the flower in his right hand, then he raises the other one, “or the maroon one?”

Lynette gives him the deadest stare she can muster. “They’re the same color.”

“Oh, sister, have you no taste?” Lyney tuts, pouting at her for a moment before returning to that constipated look as he squinted at the ‘crimson’ and ‘maroon’ flowers. Talk about being delusional.

“(Y/N)’s not gonna care whether the rose is crimson or maroon or red,” she tells him. You’d probably accept a dead flower if it came from Lyney, with that starry-eyed look you always got whenever he so much as glances your way. Lynette’s not one to judge other people’s taste too harshly, but she does wonder what you see in her overdramatic and annoying brother.

Ah, well. They do say love makes people blind. Hopefully not literally though, Lynette’s not looking forward to performing shows alone because Lyney got blinded by his love for you—though if you asked Lynette, she’d tell you it wasn’t love so much as obsession. Only someone insane would spend hours picking out flowers and calling them ‘maroon’ and ‘crimson’. It’s just red.

Lynette squints at him. “And since when were you interested in the meaning of flowers?”

“Well, I suppose you could say I like to dabble in other pursuits.” Lyney gives her a cheeky grin.

“Right…” He’s clearly losing his mind.

“Red roses symbolize true love, though rainbow roses in particular pertain to passion, and…” He trails off, eyes blinking in astonishment. She can practically see the lightbulb appearing on top of his head.

With a flick of his wrists, the ‘crimson’ and ‘maroon’ roses disappear. Lynette watches him warily, wondering what kind of outlandish idea has formed in that head of his.

But he doesn’t elaborate more, only shoots a wink at her and says, “I’ve got a great idea.”

✧

His great idea, as it turns out, is to corner you in an alleyway and make it rain rainbow roses around you as he asked you out on a date, all while Lynette is crouched on the roof, dumping sacks of rainbow roses and vindictively hoping one of them stabs Lyney in the eye. No such luck.

You, as the ever-crazy romantic that you are, are awestruck and amazed by what he’s done instead of weirded out like how a normal person would be. With an eager smile and a twinkle in your eye, you accept the rose in Lyney’s hand and say yes when he asks you to meet him for dinner tomorrow. Lynette wants to barf, but settles for dumping another sack of flowers on top of the two of you.

And if she uses a little bit of anemo to direct a few petals to Lyney’s face? Well, you removing a petal sticking to his cheek and having your fingers linger there for a few moments wasn’t part of the plan (the plan being: embarrass her brother by having him choke on a petal while he’s speaking), but she can’t entirely begrudge the result. Not when Lyney looks like he’s about to have a meltdown with just one touch from you. Good blackmail material right there.

Lynette’s happy that the two of you have finally gotten your heads off your asses and are actually going on a date. Though mostly she’s happy about the amount of mora heading her way soon.

She’ll have to thank Freminet for telling her about the bet about you and Lyney. Maybe she can start a new bet on when the two of you are getting married—probably soon, if the lovestruck look on Lyney’s face is anything to go by. She hopes he won’t be crazy enough to propose on the second date, because you’d certainly be crazy enough to accept if he did.

Oh, well. Lynette will put a bet on one month just in case.

#look i haven’t done the archon quest yet #so i don’t have a good feel yet of their characters #but i’m sticking with this characterization!!#genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #lyney x reader #gn reader #lynette

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chaosandmarigolds · 23 days

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Could I go in depth into this? Yes. And will I? Yes (in the upcoming fic) but rn you’ll get a lil dabble

Simon Riley! Who lives by routine, he thrives on it- after years in the military it’s ingrained into his DNA

Simon Riley! Who takes feeding schedule for the baby very seriously, naturally waking up at 2am even if you were not awake-

“Simon, baby- come back,”

“In a minute luv,” he would mumble, leaning over the bed to press a chase kiss to your face, “gonna get Tessie her bottle ‘n I’ll be back, yeah?”

Simon Riley! Who makes Ollie is up and ready by seven am (since you said six was a bit early)

Simon Riley! Who likes cooking, and depending on the dish- he’s pretty good at it (don’t ask him to make pasta, bad idea)

Simon Riley! Who is baffled when one of the workers at the elementy school (he giving Ollie his lunch and brought Tess with him) told him that it was a ‘woman’s duties to watch the newborn

“I mean- look at you, it little embarrassing, don’t you think?”

…

“Yer one of those ‘incel’s my son was tellin be ‘bout, yeah?”

Simon Riley! Who still has to do conferences and trainings and whatnot but lord knows that man is on face time on the drive there and back; happily listening to whatever Ollie had to say or just being on the phone while you slept

Simon Riley! Who shows his love through installing a new shower head (the one you had been eyeing for a solid two months), helping you garden (gripes about his knees the whole time but nonetheless) or just sitting in your presence

Simon Riley! Who lets you ramble, doesn’t matter what about, butterflies, trucks, stationary, books, music, fishes any and everything that caught your attention he thinks is the new ‘thing’

On that! He buys you things related to what you love- if you love prehistoric reptiles (dinosaurs) oh look at that! Matching pjs for the whole family

Simon Riley! Who plays peek a boo with Tess on his lap during breakfast, the baby squealing with laughter, which would in turn cause his own

Simon Riley! Who makes sure to always keep the flowers on the dining room table fresh

Simon Riley! Who calls you at random times-

“Hi, honey, what’s up?”

“Does Ollie still like green?”

“Mm?”

“Foun’ a bike, his size, it’s green though- tha’ be alright?”

—

“Hey-“

“I love you.”

…

“A lot. Love you a lot.”

“A…are you okay? What’s going on?”

“Johnny…he-..somethin happened, I’ll be back tonight- yeah?”

“Simon…”

“I love you. Tell the kids that too.”

annnnd heres the fic Last Call

(Annnnnyway that’s all! Comments, feedback and all that jazz means so so much to me! <3))

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disneyprincemuke · 6 months

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not a gamer * fem!driver

lando manages to convince her to start streaming on twitch with him, leading her to influence others to join her

pairings: max verstappen x fem!driver, lando norris x fem!driver, oscar piastri x fem!driver, logan sargeant x fem!driver

warnings: butt load of stupidity

notes: initially, i was gonna write a fic solely about max because he was talking about fornite the other day... but i thought how funny would it be if it were to be with some of the guys so here i am

(series masterlist) | (📂 the rookie season)

"hello, everyone," she smiles, reaching forward to adjust the camera as she squints her eyes. "is this a good angle? let me know if it's flattering, okay? i can't not look good on twitch."

lando has managed to convince her to join him for a stream on twitch, insisting that she should start an account as well. she initially refused, claiming that she's not that well-liked to start an account and have a loyal following. even adding on the fact that she's not even a good gamer to begin with.

but lando said that it doesn't matter, and proved her wrong by setting up a poll on his previous stream just to get her to make an account. which, the effort was very endearing.

"you always look good," she squints, turning away the right where her other monitor sits. she scrunches her nose and turns to the camera to stare into it. "logan, how did you even know i was streaming tonight?"

she rolls her eyes when his reply rolls in, claiming that he follows her twitter where she announced it. "it's time for you to go out and do something else besides stalking me, logan," she scoffs jokingly with the roll of her eyes.

"okay, so this is my first twitch stream!" she beams, sitting up straighter as she grabs her mouse. "i'm just waiting for lando to finish setting up, so i'm afraid you guys are stuck with me alone for a couple of minutes. let's get to know each other, i might be doing this pretty often this winter break just to have a bit of a hobby.

"i wanna know what you guys want to see from me."

a comment immediately rolls in.

user1: i wanna see you play fortnite with lando and max

she grins sheepishly, dropping her head. "guys, i'm not much of a gamer. never have been so this is actually my first time-ish touching games in a long while. my longest experience was playing roblox with my younger brother when we were younger."

user2: how about oscar or logan playing some games?

she presses her lips together, thinking of ways she could be able to convince her best friends to join her for some online games. when, neither of them has really dabbled much in the hobby. "i'm sure logan will be pretty keen to try, but i'm not so sure about oscar. i'll try to convince him, though he's back in australia for the majority of the break, unfortunately. the timezone difference is absolutely insane."

logansargeant: guys, ask her what her hobbies are

"logan, get off my chat!"

logansargeant: im gonna expose you on twitter for cyberbullying

logansargeant: #endcyberbullying2023

user3: #justice4logan

user4: #justice4logan

user5: u should talk about taylor swift

“oh, my god! i should!” she squeals. “we should host a listen party when she releases reputation! how good was the 1989 vault tracks?”

user6: omg ur so right

user7: iion slaps

user8: slut! is my favourite i think

“1989 had the best vault tracks,” she nods, lips pressed together. “my favourite is ‘now that we don’t talk’ because i like calling my mom.”

blythe.yln: where is lando!!!

“guys, i don’t know. he texted me 5 minutes ago saying he was setting up his pc,” she grins into the camera. “hopefully he’s here soon.”

dalton.yln: i miss oscar

oscahpastry: i miss u too

“you’ve got phones, yeah?” she grins, “use it instead of flooding my chat.”

user1: yeah guys, some of us are trying to get her attention

user9: u guys get that enough

user10: leave some for us pls

user11: yeah y so selfish

she scoffs. "right, guys? can you believe these people?"

the discord sound makes her jump, lando's voice filling up her headphones. "yo, i'm sorry! i was looking for my keyboard."

"where'd you find it, lando?"

"under the bed. apparently, that's where i kept it the last time i streamed," lando laughs. "okay, let's start off with a little horror game? it's called phasmophobia."

"a scary game?" she looks at the camera. "why would i willingly play that?"

"lando, i'm gonna kill you!" she screeches, eyes closing as the creepy sounds from the game boost in her headphones. she peeks through her eye, watching the two hands on her screen before the screen goes foggy.

lando's laughter replaces the eerie sounds of the game, making her roll her eyes. "i told you to hide and close the door!”

“i didn’t know where the stupid door even was!” she screams back, slamming the table. “lando, i don’t wanna play this game anymore!”

“but it’s so fun!”

“lando!”

logansargeant: that was funny

logansargeant: lemme join u some time

user11: omg

user11: half the grid’s gonna be on twitch?

“yeah, i’m so nice, right?” she jokes. “i’m letting them explore different career options. influencer era or something, i believe.”

oscahpastry: i only created an account to annoy her :/

seb.v5: same

user12: no shot thats actually sebastian vettel

maxverstappen1: so we are all just here waiting for an invite from these two???

logansargeant: theyre gatekeeping the stream from us :(

maxverstappen1: i wanna play fortnite

seb.v5: wait i know that game

maxverstappen1: let me join or i’ll report your account

“that’s not very nice, max,” she frowns. she looks away for a second. “lando, max says he’ll report my account if we don’t invite him to play fortnite.”

“oh, let him report you. just make another account, mate!” lando laughs. “ask him to join us phasmophobia! it’s so fun seeing you scream.”

she turns to the camera with a lopsided grin. “chat, tell lando you don’t wanna see me scream in phasmo anymore please. i’m sick of this game, i’ve got no idea what i’m doing, and i haven’t guessed the ghost correctly this entire time.”

logansargeant: keep playing phasmophobia u pussy

oscahpastry: yeah pussy

user5: its v entertaining icl

maxverstappen1: but phasmophobia costs money

“costs money?” she repeats, confusion on her face. “max? do you need financial aid?”

user10: isnt max a millionaire??????

user13: bro is complaining about a game that barely costs anything while getting paid millions a year 💀

oscahpastry: that’s wild ngl

maxverstappen1: wow i just got cyberbullied.

maxverstappen1: i’ll go get it now damn.

she sighs. “guess we’re continuing with this stupid game.”

“lando, where am i going?” max shouts, her character watching max’s go around in circles, flickering the flashlight on and off. “what am i even supposed to do?”

teaching one person how to play a complicated game like phasmophobia is easy. teaching two, however, is absolutely absurd. lando doesn’t know how much more of this he can take.

“lando, there’s something written in the book!” she cheers, crouching her character down. she leans into her monitor as she tries to make out what it says. “bitch, it says run!”

she quickly gets up and walks out. “don’t have to tell me twice.”

“run where?” max shouts, his character still running in circles. “(y/n), where are you? escort me out.”

“guys, just stay inside the house and help me out!” lando whines, his character flickering the flashlight at max’s. “turn around, max. i’m here with you.”

“i’m going to the van.”

“no, you’re not! come here and camp the ghost with us!”

“absolutely not! i’m so scared shitless!”

“we should’ve just played fortnite, you know.”

“guys, please! you just have to hold the equipment for me.”

“oh, my god! oh, my god! the front door is locked!” she screams. “the front door is locked!”

logansargeant: lol dsurv

oscahpastry: not so tough now (y/n)

user8: LMFAO THAT GHOST IS HUNTIN

user14: dude the chaos is insane

user15: i need her to stream everyday actually

user16: she’s gonna be an influencer i can feel it in my bones

user17: u guys should try valorant

oscahpastry: i’d join if they play valorant

user4: omg thats crazy

user18: i kinda want to see it

user19: max playing valorant? the rage that man would feel

“lando, i’m dead again!” she screeches, slamming her mouse down into her desk. “we should’ve just played fortnite.”

logansargeant: ur issues with the door are hilarious

user4: i’ll be thinking about your inability to hide in a room for days

oscahpastry: evidence that u wouldnt survive a horror movie at all

seb.v5: maybe you should stick to sitting there and looking pretty

user20: OMG SEB CALLED HER PRETTYYYYY

user21: are we all so shocked?

user22: yeah, he looks at that girl like she aligns the stars in the sky on a race weekend

user23: him during her podium celebration cured my depression (real)

logansargeant: girl why r u just stalking lando as a ghost

“lando,” she whispers. “i saw the ghost in the corner for the room.”

“what?” max asks, voice trembling slightly. “what corner?”

“that corner.”

“what corner?”

“there. i’m pointing at it.”

“i can’t see you, stupid. you’re dead.”

“then that’s too bad.”

“i figured what type of ghost it is!” lando cheers. “follow me, max. let’s get out of this stupid house and play your stupid fortnite or something.”

“oh, how lovely! i saw (y/n)’s chat… something about valorant,” max mutters, following lando through the dark house. “i’ve seen that on tiktok and it looks kinda- lando, why’d you close the door?”

“i told you i saw the ghost lurking more than usual,” she mutters.

“i don’t even know what that means!” max shouts.

“i didn’t close the door, mate!” lando laughs. “go and hide in a room, max!”

“where? i don’t know where to go!” max screams, frantically running around in hopes of finding solace somewhere.

her character follows behind the entity in the game, clearly running around to find max. “oh, she’s coming for you, max! she’s angry!”

“i don’t know where to go!” max screams, his character running by the entryway in confusion. “lando, where do i go?”

“max, she’s coming! go in the closet!”

“what closet? oh, okay! i see it!”

“close the door, max!”

“what door- oh! okay!”

“did he live?”

“i think so. the ghost is lurking outside max’s door,” she grins into the camera, watching the entity walk back and forth outside the room max is in.

“don’t come out yet.”

“not even a chance, mate.”

“okay, she’s gone,” she sighs. “i’m gonna log out and create an account on fortnite.”

“we’re not gonna play valorant?”

“okay, chat, we’re waiting for oscar to finish the tutorial,” she smiles. “we should be in our first game in a couple of minutes.”

user24: bro ur tutorial was horrendous

user25: i love watching people be bad at valorant

user26: shes so real for that though

user27: she’d play sage for sure

seb.v5: i can’t believe you got oscar to join you

user28: and logan 🤨

user17: outrageous that i’ve been begging the grid to join lando’s streams and here she comes casually getting them to play silly games

user3: real

user28: everyone say thank you (y/n)

blythe.yln: i can’t believe u didnt ask me to join u

blythe.yln: i’m the best at valorant

blythe.yln: i’m better than dalton

user29: YES BLYTHE SPEAK YOUR TRUTH

“so, what do i do again, dalton?” lando asks softly. “what’s the ‘e’ button do?”

“puts up a wall,” the younger kid says. “and then it heals you too, but damages other people. even your teammates.”

“who’s this eminem looking bro?” max asks, giggling slightly. “frank ocean, i saw on tiktok.”

user30: my roman empire is blythe being a pro valorant player but this is the first time her sister is trying the game

“well, i’m sorry for doing other things than playing valorant,” she jokes with a smile. “but, yes, guys! blythe plays valorant for a living which is exactly why we didn’t invite her to play.”

user31: blythe is a pro val player!!?!?!?

user31: since when??

blythe.yln: yeah guys follow my twitch, i’ll treat u better

“i’m going to ban you from my chat if you keep marketing, blythe,” she frowns, though a smile creeping up on her face. “where is dalton?”

blythe.yln: dalton is my valorant spawn… i taught him what he knows

user31: dalton to go pro in a couple years?

user32: omg that’s crazy

user1: the yln’s are gonna take over the valorant scene

user6: blythe getting a redbull gaming clutch would be to die for

“mate, dalton, what’s this girl in the yellow jacket do? she looks stylish,” oscar asks.

“she’s got a turret and grenades,” dalton answers simply.

“alright, how do i get her?”

“you gotta play the game.”

“oh, what? that’s so unfair.”

“yeah, i’m sure that sucks that you’ve got to play the game, oscar,” she says. “where is logan?”

“i’m sorry,” the sigh in logan’s sentence making her laugh. “i got stuck.”

“how?” oscar asks with a laugh. “they literally tell you what to do.”

“i couldn’t find the buttons they were asking me to press,” logan mumbles with a hint of disappointment.

“are you actually intellectually hindered, mate?” she cries with a laugh, covering her eyes. “do you not frequent a laptop?”

“not really, no.”

“it shows,” oscar adds on.

blythe.yln: he’s gonna be shit

user5: so real i can alr see it

user11: dude they’re gonna be screaming at each other soon

“let’s do a quick test game,” dalton mutters as logan’s in-game name pops up on the screen. “just a short game.”

“with real people?” lando asks in a small voice. “that can trash talk me?”

“just trash talk them back, mate,” max answers. “easy.”

“just find their ip address and hit them,” logan suggests. “that’s easier.”

“what?”

“don’t pretend like you wouldn’t do it too, (y/n)!” logan whines. “come on, let’s start!”

“how do i defuse the spike?” max screams, looking at the ground as he runs around. “where even is it?”

“your left,” dalton says. “keep walking.”

blythe is now sat next to her older sister, leg propped up in her seat as she watches the screen.

“okay, okay, go to the right and look right here,” blythe mutters, pointing at the screen. “and then aim right here,” she adjusts her sister’s mouse, “when you see somebody, shoot.”

“that’s not fair. (y/n)’s literally got a pro helping her with the game,” oscar complains.

“you’re dead. literally doesn’t matter if someone’s helping you or not,” logan states. “we suck, man.”

“okay, i figured out how to defuse the bomb,” max says softly. “what now?”

“learn to play better,” blythe says loud enough for the microphone to pick up her voice. “i’ll teach you guys.”

“thank you for tuning into my stream,” she grins with a clap. “i appreciate all of the support and teaching me how to play the games. and roasting me.”

logansargeant: bro we suck

seb.v5: should stick to racing and leave gaming to blythe and dalton

“i read each and every comment you guys sent in the chat and they’re all very endearing. except yours, seb,” she stares into the camera with a stern expression, “yours were just outright unnecessary and kinda mean.”

oscahpastry: start a podcast next

maxverstappen1: i wanna be first guest

user16: please stream regularly!!

user10: make oscar play lethal company or i’ll cry

oscahpastry: stop giving her ideas

user21: when r u streaming again

“i will try to stream in a couple of days, after my shoots and marketing stuff with the team,” she grins. “thank you for watching me scream for 4 hours. catch you guys soon. stay kind and stay safe.”

user2: i’ll miss you 🫶🏼

taglist: @wcnorris @treehouse-mouse @laura-naruto-fan1998 @mindless-rock @inejismywife @vellicora @leilanixx @meadhgbcavanagh @2bormaybenot @ironmaiden1313 @angsthology @cherry-piee @christianpulisic10 @elliegrey2803 @cashtons-wife @love4lando @sadg3 @bborra @a10vely-yutazen @mellowarcadefun

#max verstappen x reader #lando norris x reader #oscar piastri x reader #logan sargeant x reader #fem!driver #female driver #f1 fem!driver #f1 female driver #vettel reincarnate #disneyprincemuke #disneyprincemuke imagine #disneyprincemuke imagines #disneyprincemuke f1 #disneyprincemuke vr #formula 1 x reader #f1 x reader #f1 grid x reader

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brewed-pangolin · 23 days

Text

There is just something so endearing about Soap MacTavish in the morning.

The soft golden light of the sun playing along the tips of his disheveled mohawk. Its bright honey color accentuated the stubble along his chin, dabbling it in crystalline sunlight flecks that glisten with every movement of a dreamlike breath.

Yet, somehow, despite the glowing aura that currently surrounded him, it was his eyes that always seemed to pull you in the most in the early hours of the day. Still hidden from view underneath heavy lids and caged behind thick lashes that never ceased to tear a jealous groan from the depths of your chest.

Slowly, as to not outright disturb him from his much needed slumber, you inched yourself closer until your chest pressed against the flesh of his arm. Dipping beneath to place yourself between his muscular reach and the density of his torso. Laying your head just below the cusp of his underarm as your hand delicately laid out atop the flesh of his chest.

A subtle twitch to the corner of his mouth is the first indication that your gentle measures are quickly culminating to the desired effect.

You feel the muscles tighten beneath his taut skin as he expands the bulk of his chest to inhale a heavy breath. Dense fibrous tissue rippling underneath his flesh to the flexion of his limbs, stretching his stiff form from the tight grip of sleep to pull you closer against him as a breathy growl rolls over a lengthy exhale.

"Mornin', bonnie," he mutters. Voice groggy and thick with Scottish brogue while his eyes still hide behind the curtains of his lids.

"Good morning, mo cridhe."

And likes Moses with the Red Sea, that simple term of Gaelic endearment uttered so sweetly from your lips finally parted the veil to his soul as he cast down his celestial gaze upon you.

"Hmm. Yer learnin', hen."

"I do what I can, Johnny," you breathed lowly. Catching a lump in your throat as your thoughts bottle between the walls of your windpipe.

"Besides, I love waking up to those beautiful blue eyes of yours."

"Jus' me eyes, lass?"

The sun's light trickled at the edges of his cerulean maelstroms, igniting a golden blaze that licked towards the flexing obsidian and tugged you further into the gravity that was him.

Words dissolved on the tip of your tongue as you lost yourself within the immensity of his stare. No other could make you forget the simplicity of language and the necessity to breathe like John MacTavish. Only with the gentle feel of his thumb against your shoulder did you ultimately fall back to Earth. Landing in his bed of unending affection to nestle yourself forever into the deep crevices of his heart.

"Not just your eyes, Johnny."

Your admission falls on a gradual exhale, fingers traversing along the middle of his torso between the deep grooves of his abdomen. Guided by a trail of perfectly dusted hair beneath his navel, only to halt your descent and place the palm of your hand along the curve of his Adonis belt.

"Then wha' is it, bonnie? Wha' is it about me eyes tha' makes ya go all dopey?"

You contemplated your answer for a moment. Running your fingers along the length of his pelvis to feel the tightening tension beneath his skin.

"They're like a second dusk before the blinding brightness of the sun washes them away. A last glimmer of twilight peaking through the ether, only to succumb to the glare of breaking dawn."

"Steamin' Jesus, lass. Ya jus' come up with tha' one? Or have ya been holdin' on tae tha' fer a while?"

"Little bit of both."

Your confession rolled over your trembling bottom lip like fog on a pebbled shore. Embedded with a hint of humor that never went unnoticed as Soap responded in kind by gently shifting you onto your back.

Bringing your hands to rest along the dense curvature of his neck, hovering above and caging you against the mattress as he lowered himself between the spreading valley of your open legs.

"Ya keep talkin' like tha', bonnie, an' yer gonnae find these eyes between a pair of very familiar thighs."

"Wouldn't be the first time."

"Wonnae be tha' last either."

Soap's eyes lit up like glistening orbs caught in a raging firelight. His smile etched across the entirety of his mouth, only further accenting his paradisical demeanor as he graced your lips with a kiss that breathed new life into the dawning of your groggy soul.

Immediately granting him entry into the warm chasm of your mouth. His exquisite tongue carrying the remnants of last night's whisky with the subbtle smokiness of tobacco etched along its fragrant border.

The mind-altering concoction seeping into your bloodstream like a substance not meant for the frailty of this world. Tearing away the cemented walls of reality as you fell like a heavy stone into the sunken fabric of the mattress beneath.

"Wha- what about me, Johnny?" You crooked when his lips tore away from your mouth, moving across your jaw and into the curve of your neck.

"You? Wha' ya mean?" He questioned between gentle, open-mouthed kisses against your neck. Voice subdued and muffled as his tongue lapped at the divine saltiness of your skin.

"What am I to you, Johnny? Right now."

Soap reluctantly pulled his mouth away to stare into your fluttering depths once more. Minding the growing fluster behind your eyes, taking note of your change in breath and the deep flush emanating from the valley of your chest.

"You, mo ghrádh," he started. Accent thicker than molasses and collapsing like time hardened lumber.

"Yer like the first sip of scotch on a cold winter's mornin'. Hot, heavy, and so damn addicting."

The air in your lungs froze, leaching their life giving oxygen into your pleading bronchioles. Halted by his unapologetic sincerity as your blood purged from your chest to pool within the deep chasm of your core.

"Jesus Christ, Johnny. You just bought yourself a one way ticket to Poundtown for that one."

"Aye? Complimentary in flight meal?"

"Of course. Only the best for you."

"There's a good lass."

He pressed his lips to yours for one final union. Only to begin his methodical descent, traversing over the curve of your neck and into the deep vale between your breasts. His calloused yet tender hands following in their wake, gliding over the perking flesh of your nipples while his mouth ghosted over the undulating skin of your stomach. The sporadic movement of your diaphragm creating a constant wave to your torso, tugging a smile to the corners of his mouth as he breathed a muffled chortle against the suppleness of your skin.

"Didnae expect so much turbulence, bonnie."

"Shut up, Johnny."

The bed shifted beneath your trembling frame as he repositioned himself between your thighs. Only now, with heat of his body pulled away did you feel the wetness embedded within your folds. The cool air causing a shiver to run up your spine as he cradled your knees over the sculpted broadness of his shoulders.

"Fuckin' hell, lass. Yer soakin' fer me already," he muttered against the sensitiveness of your inner thigh.

Prolonging the inevitable. Torturous intent with an impish furrow to his brow as he patiently waited for that simple utterance to give him the verbal go ahead.

"Johnny, please.."

"Aye. There it is."

Tagging the Soap Sqaud, as this will be my last post for the season.

@deadbranch @ohgeesoap @writeforfandoms @efingart @sofasoap @d3athtr4psworld @mini-metal @shotmrmiller @homicidal-slvt @glitterypirateduck @astraluminaaa @ghosts-goldendoodle @a-small-writer-in-a-big-world @crashtestbunny @greatstormcat @crashandlivewrites @glossysoap @soapsgf @devcica @gazs-blue-hat @tacticalanxiety @chamomiletealeaf @thetrashpossum @simpingoverquestionablemen @queen-ilmaree @weebumochi @dustycrusty09 @sadstone-s @foxface013 @lily-ilo @slutweeds

#soap squad™️#morning glory #soft!soap #johnny soap mactavish #john soap mactavish #soap mactavish #john mactavish #soap mactavish x you #soap mactavish x f!reader #johnny mactavish x you #johnny mactavish x f!reader #cod fanfic #call of duty #cod

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