#for advice. if there’s a rehab near you then see if you can bring the animal in | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

youngerdrgrey · 3 years

Text

I know you (even if you don’t want me to) // a batwoman fic, chapter 3

about: After finding out Batwoman’s identity, Sophie tries to trap Ryan with her newfound knowledge. If she’s going to be on the outside, she might as well have some fun – and maybe fall in love along the way. #Wildmoore

CHAPTER THREE SUMMARY: The burner doesn't work out quite the way either of them intend it to. Luckily, Mary has an idea that brings a little more fight into their lives. + read on ao3

previously: read chapter one + chapter two

Sophie to 2.0 🦇 (07:13) Come on, I thought that was a good one.

2.0 🦇 to Sophie (07:45) Surprised you’re not nursing a hangover

Sophie to 2.0 🦇 (07:47) It takes more than a few margaritas to keep me down.

2.0 🦇 to Sophie (07:49) Copy that

Sophie to 2.0 🦇 (07:52) I’m surprised you’re awake. Shouldn’t you be sleeping by day to patrol the city by night?

2.0 🦇 to Sophie (08:03) You know I’m not actually a bat right?

Sophie to 2.0 🦇 (08:05) Obviously. Well, if you need it, The Hold Up has great coffee during the day.

2.0 🦇 to Sophie (08:15) No thanks. Coffee stunts your growth.

Sophie to 2.0 🦇 (08:17) Aww, are you speaking from experience? Because you’re so short?

2.0 🦇 to Sophie (08:18) Hey, “though she be but little…”

Sophie to 2.0 🦇 (08:19) “...she be tiny asf”

2.0 🦇 to Sophie (08:21) af* no one uses the asf

Sophie to 2.0 🦇 (08:22) Consider me no one then

2.0 🦇 to Sophie (08:23) Already there

Sophie to 2.0 🦇 (08:24) Aww, you’re thinking about me?

2.0 🦇 to Sophie (08:30) Thinking about how to get you to stop texting me

Sophie to 2.0 🦇 (08:31) You could stop responding for one

(08:34) Okay, didn’t expect you to take the first piece of advice I gave you

(08:45) Fine. I did walk into that….

(09:01) Somebody left money to pay for my coffee. You wouldn’t happen to know anything about that, would you?

(09:31) Thanks.

“Sophie, please stop staring at your phone.”

Sophie glances up from her multiple delivered messages. Mary’s wide eyes seem more wary than frustrated. Probably because she knows that it’s been three days since Ryan last texted Sophie. Mary has to know. Mary’s probably choking on the second hand embarrassment of watching Ryan ghost Sophie in real time. This is a pity girls’ day with pity mimosas and face masks.

Mary points at the newly decorated ‘Phone Rehabilitation Center’ basket on the coffee table. It’s next to the mimosa pitcher.

“It was a phone prison before Jordan came over,” Mary explains. “Your sister redecorated it.”

Sophie’s eyebrows scrunch together. “I didn’t know Jordan came over.” Is everyone welcome here except her? How does her little sister get to talk to Ryan before Sophie does?

Mary relaxes into her comfy chair. “Yeah, she and Imani came over to talk center stuff with Ryan a few days ago. Ryan was so pissed about how early the meeting was. She loves sleeping in.”

That explains why Ryan was up so early that day, but not the radio silence. Sophie picks up her own mimosa to seem more casual. She mirrors Mary’s position by leaning back into the couch.

“Does Ryan usually stay out late?”

Mary shrugs. “You know, with the bar, she can be out pretty late. And with her seeing Imani—”

“Imani?” Sophie shakes her head. That’s a second mention of this woman. “What happened to Angelique?”

“Um….” Mary’s eyes dart towards Ryan’s bedroom, then down to her glass. “You know, I am not... at liberty to say… because… I’m not supposed to know anything?”

Sophie drops her voice. “Mary.”

Mary rushes through her answer. “Batwoman saved Angelique, and then Angelique went into witness protection with the FBI rather than talking to the Crows again because she didn’t want to get snatched up like last time — no offense. But she stopped here before leaving because she wanted Ryan to go with her.”

“She what!?” Sophie’s drink sloshes as she jolts forward on the couch.

Mary throws a frantic hand up. “But Ryan obviously didn’t go with her! Ryan’s whole life is here in Gotham. It just, you know, made a pretty permanent break up for the two of them. This one coincidentally is not your fault.”

Sophie narrows her eyes at the dig. “Thanks for that.”

Mary grins. “Maybe with Angelique out of the picture, you and Ryan can actually be friends now.”

Unlike the fake friends that they’ve been the last few months. The ever-evolving enemies. The… Crow and the convict.

Sophie sighs. “I’m not the one with the problem, Mary.”

Mary opens her mouth to say something else, but the door rattles before she can finish. She knocks back the last of her mimosa and reaches for the pitcher. Rolls her shoulders like she’s preparing for battle.

Sophie turns on the couch to get a look at Ryan. She tucks a foot under her and keeps an arm on the top to keep her posture straight.

Ryan hasn’t looked up yet. She adjusts the collar on yet another flannel shirt while pocketing her keys in her jeans. She says, “Please tell me you didn’t drink all the mimosas on your own.”

Mary gives a distressed chuckle. “Nope, I got some help!”

Ryan finally looks up and stops cold at the sight of Sophie.

“Why is there a Crow in our loft?”

Sophie rolls her eyes. “You left the windows open.”

Ryan holds her hands up in mock defense. “My bad. Not used to being somewhere without bars on them.”

“Or without wheels,” Sophie offers.

Ryan falters at that. Her genuine shock turns from Sophie to Mary. “You told her?”

Mary stutters. “No, I-I definitely didn’t—” Mary looks to Sophie for support.

Sophie plants her other foot back on the ground. “I saw you, Ryan. You used to park near the quarry, and I run there in the mornings sometimes.”

Most times, actually. The first time Sophie saw Ryan parked out there, it seemed like a late night gone wrong. Like maybe Ryan had been watching the stars in the spot near the river. The quarry used to be a popular makeout spot, then the Wonderland Gang took it over, and then well, the Wonderland Gang was defunct. So, an empty quarry means a quiet spot with a nice view of Gotham. There are worse places to park.

Ryan’s eyebrows knit together. “But you never said….”

“Said what? ‘Wow, Ryan, how’s homelessness treating you?’ That would’ve gone over well.”

Ryan crosses her arms over her chest. “It’s going over great right now.”

Sophie takes a long breath in. This isn’t coming out right. But if she starts talking in specifics, it’ll freak Ryan out. It’ll make her run away again, just as they’re finally in the same space again.

Sophie reasons, “You weren’t a danger to yourself, or anyone else. I mean, you were watering your plant with a Britta filter for Pete’s sake.”

It was maybe the third or fourth time that Sophie saw Ryan there. Ryan was in another freaking flannel and shorts. Her hair was up in a messy bun, and Chaka Khan played from the van’s speakers. Ryan tipped over the last of the water in her filtered pitcher into her plant. And Sophie couldn’t look away.

But it seemed like a private moment, so eventually, Sophie left Ryan to it. Kept jogging and told herself not to look back.

Ryan’s soft laugh pulls Sophie out of the memory. Sophie’s eyes jump to Ryan’s, and for a moment, Ryan doesn’t hide. Doesn’t throw up a wall or a real deflection. She actually lets Sophie see her.

Sophie hopes Ryan can see her back. She isn’t here to make things more complicated, or to infringe on Ryan’s right to choose her friends. She wants to be here. She wants to know Ryan.

Does Ryan still sing to her plants in the loft? Was she joking about not drinking coffee, or is she seriously a tea kind of girl? Sophie’s not great with tea. Not great at waiting and finding the right mix of sugar to keep it from getting too bitter. Maybe Ryan could show her.

“Hey Ryan!” Mary yelps. She hits Ryan with a loaded stare as both Ryan and Sophie turn to face her. Sophie’s grateful that she can blame the slight darkening of her cheeks on the mimosas. “How’s Imani?”

Ryan doesn’t miss a beat. “Imani’s great. She’s watching my class tomorrow.”

Sophie’s surprised. “Are you in school?”

Mary answers for her. “Ryan teaches martial arts at the center.” Then Mary smirks. “She spent all of last week complaining that she doesn’t have a partner for demonstrations.”

Ryan glares daggers at Mary, but Sophie’s face brightens with the assist. Sophie gets to give Ryan the wide smile of possibility this time.

Ryan immediately shakes her head. “I’m going to kill you.”

Mary ignores Ryan and pulls her phone out of the rehab basket. After a quick peek at her calendar, she tells Sophie, “Class is at nine AM.”

Ryan groans. “Whose side are you on?”

Mary picks her mimosa back up. “We’re all on the same team, Ryan.”

Sophie picks hers up too. “I’ll even bring the coffee.”

Ryan purses her lips. Sophie waits for her to object to the coffee, but instead Ryan stomps over to the mimosa pitcher and takes the whole thing with her to her room.

Crowphie to Ryan (07:45) How do you take your coffee?

Ryan to Crowphie (07:49) I don’t.

(07:50) I live above a shop. You don’t need to bring me anything.

Crowphie to Ryan (07:52) In that case, you should be bringing the coffee.

Ryan to Crowphie (07:54) You’re hijacking my class AND making me bring you stuff?

Crowphie to Ryan (07:55) Pretty sure no one “makes you” do anything, Ryan.

(07:56) It’s fine. I’m making my own anyway.

Ryan to Crowphie (07:58) Why’d you ask if you’re making your own?

Crowphie to Ryan (08:01) It’s called making conversation.

Ryan to Crowphie (08:03) Well you’re making me late. See you at class

It is oddly satisfying to spar with Sophie. Their styles are different, and Sophie knows how to use her height to her advantage. On the other hand, Ryan’s used to being underestimated and gets to show her students how to turn that in their favor. Despite doing her absolute best, though, the kids only care about Miss Sophie.

“Miss Sophie, your hair is so pretty,” little Kylie says.

“Miss Sophie, will you be coming back next week?” Aaron asks.

“Miss Sophie, have you ever seen Batwoman?” Celeste — the little traitor — asks next.

Ryan has to walk over to the teacher’s table to keep from rolling her eyes at the kids. Imani watches her with a little grin. Ryan softens up enough to wink back. They usually sneak off once classes end. Find a nice corner of the center to make out in while the kids get picked up. Today, the kids won’t actually leave the room.

Sophie swipes a towel at the sweat on her forehead. Her skin’s flush in a way that Ryan tries not to pay attention to. She addresses each of the kids with their own individual smile.

“Thank you. I don’t know about next week. And yes,” Sophie gives an even wider smile to Celeste, the quiet preteen who’s already said more to Sophie in one class than she has to in Ryan in three, “I’ve even saved her.”

The kids close in on Sophie, forming a full circle around where she stands at the center of the room. Their questions all overlap. “Really? You saved her? When?”

Ryan bites down a sigh. Sophie answers, “A few months ago. We were trying to save somebody, and Batwoman got really hurt. We thought she was going to die.”

Aaron — a ten-year-old who wears his brother’s hand-me-downs — pops closer to Sophie’s face. Sophie instinctively leans back, but Aaron takes it in stride. “Batwoman can’t get hurt. She’s invincible.” Ryan smiles at him.

Sophie shrugs. “Tell that to her. I had to carry her all the way back. All by myself, like this.” Sophie holds out her bare arms like a freaking bridal carry. Ryan’s smile drops. There’s no way she’s letting Sophie lie like this to the kids. Sophie helped Ryan stand up, sure, but then Ryan was on a gurney with Mary pushing it. There was no crossing the threshold.

Celeste asks Sophie, “Did you see the Batcave?”

Sophie nods. “Yup. She can’t go to the hospital. So, she’s bleeding into her suit, and I’m just barely holding the both of us up as we crawl into the Batcave—”

Ryan can’t help herself at this point. She steps towards Sophie. “I’m sorry, crawl?”

Sophie lights up at the question. “It’s a cave. We had to crawl.”

“While you’re carrying her?”

Sophie nods again. “I can show you how we did it. You’re probably about her size.”

Aaron argues, “Batwoman’s much bigger than Ryan.” Sophie laughs.

Ryan scoffs. “I could take down Batwoman. You’ve all seen my moves.” She glances around, but all of the kids laugh at her. Even Imani chuckles before pulling her lips together. Ryan swipes her hands through the air. “Sophie’s lying anyway. No way she carried Batwoman.”

Sophie quirks an eyebrow. “You want to fact check?”

“Hell yeah,” Ryan says. A few kids ooooh at her curse word. “Go ahead and flip the signal.”

“I’ve got something faster.” Sophie crosses to the teacher’s table for her bag. Hers is right next to Ryan’s. Ryan’s, which most definitely has the Bat-Burner inside of it. Shit. Did Ryan remember to put it on silent? She can’t remember. It should be on silent, but she might’ve flipped it back to vibrate during the rescue mission.

Shit, shit. It will vibrate the moment that Sophie calls it. Ryan could try to write it off as her own cell phone ringing, but the timing would be way too suspect for Sophie.

Ryan makes a big show of rolling her eyes. “Right, like you’ve got Batwoman’s phone number.”

Sophie pulls her phone out and scrolls down her list of contacts. “See for yourself.” She holds it out for Ryan to see. The kids clamber to stand behind Ryan for a better view.

“2.0 with a bat emoji? That could be anyone,” Ryan says.

“I could call it. See if she answers, unless there’s some reason she might not be available right now.” Sophie has that look again, like she knows something that Ryan doesn’t. It makes Ryan’s blood boil. Makes her heart beat faster and her palms sweat.

Ryan needs to be faster. Needs a real excuse why Sophie can’t call right now that doesn’t undermine what she’s been saying. Her eyes dart to Imani, and Imani — bless her heart — must see the panic there.

Imani claps her hands together. The students groan before she starts talking.

“Alright, that’s enough excitement for today. Parents and guardians should all be at the front doors by now. You all should be headed home, so that the grown ups can head home too.”

The kids grumble, but they make their ways to the doors. Celeste lingers in the doorway after the others go.

“Miss Sophie?” she says. Sophie still holds her phone like a detonator.

“Yes?”

“I really hope you do come back. And I’m glad you saved Batwoman, even if Miss Ryan doesn’t believe you.” Celeste throws a little smirk at Ryan. “See you next week.”

Ryan waves her out of the room. “Go on, traitor.” Celeste laughs on her way out the door. Ryan steps back so she can sit on the teacher’s table.

Imani slips next to Ryan and sits down too. She keeps her body angled towards Sophie and wiggles her eyebrows.

“Batwoman’s number, huh? What else have you two gotten up to?” Imani teases.

Sophie barks out a laugh. “It is not like that.”

Imani nudges Ryan in the side. Tries to get Ryan in on it. Imani calls, “Bullshit. All those quiet nights on the rooftops, saving her, quietly nursing her back to health?” The leading tone mixes with the highest suggestive eyebrows that Ryan has ever seen. “I don’t know, even the way you say her name.”

Sophie says, “What, Batwoman?”

Imani sighs it out, mockingly. “Batwoman. You can admit that you’ve got a crush.”

Ryan adds, “On the O.G. definitely.” Sophie loved Kate.

Imani quickly corrects, “No offense to the O.G., but I’m talking about 2.0. Have you seen the way she fills out that suit?”

Sophie’s widening eyes meet Ryan’s for a second. Sophie drops her eyes to the floor. “I haven’t noticed,” she says, but her voice sounds smaller. Airier than normal. Is she lying?

Imani jokes. “Girl, are you sure you’re gay? The visits to The Hold Up made me wonder, but—”

“Yes,” Sophie sounds defensive immediately, “I am very, very gay. I am part of the reason The Hold Up even exists. My ex — Kate — started the bar after the owner across the street was homophobic towards us.”

Imani cringes. “Very passive aggressive. Do you get free drinks for that honor?”

“Not yet, but I’ll ask the manager.” Sophie’s shoulders relax. Ryan breathes a bit easier too. Good, a subject change.

Ryan grins. “Request denied.”

Sophie smirks. “That’s not what you said the other night.”

Imani furrows her brow. “The other night?”

Ryan resists the urge to say, It’s not like that.

Sophie clarifies, “Ryan kept me company when my date bailed.”

“Your date?” Imani sneaks a glance over at Ryan. Why is she looking at Ryan like that? Like she’s seeing something she doesn’t like?

Sophie rolls her eyes before answering, “Batwoman.”

Imani full belly laughs. All her tension evaporates, and Sophie mock-laughs along with her. “Oh, you got it bad. Do you know if this one’s gay too?”

They literally talked about it on the roof a few nights ago.

“She is.” Sophie pops the imaginary collar on her muscle tee. “She’s honestly pretty into me. She asked me out once.”

Ryan’s quick to interject. “You asked her out.”

Sophie corrects, “Only because she has the hots for me. I mean she practically admitted it when we were on that island.”

Ryan tries to keep her voice steady. “So she was dying and thought it was the right time to admit to a crush?”

“Heat of the moment, Ryan. She didn’t want to die without telling me.”

“If that’s true, then why did she stand you up last week?”

“You tell me. I don’t bail on set plans.”

“You bailed after the run.” Took off to fight Black Mask alone and left Ryan standing in the loft like a dumbass.

Sophie takes a step towards Ryan. “You’re still upset about that?”

Ryan hops off the table to get in Sophie’s face. “When was I supposed to get over it? While we waited for you to come back or the next day when you had absolutely no idea where Ang was?”

Sophie rolls her eyes down at Ryan. “Lucky for you, Batwoman put it together.”

“And lucky for you, I’ve got better things to do than wait around for you to actually do the right thing.” Ryan glares up at Sophie, and the fire in Sophie’s eyes threatens to burn them both.

Imani clears her throat. Ryan refuses to back down from the staring match. Sophie cools.

Imani asks, “How do you two know each other again?”

Ryan snaps, “We don’t,” at the same time that Sophie says, “Mutual friends.”

Sophie scoffs, but the fire’s already dimmed into something a lot like disappointment. “You know, there is a lot we still don’t know about each other, Ryan.” She breaks the stare to pick up her bag. “Thanks for letting me join the class. You two have fun.”

“We will,” Ryan assures her. It comes out more forceful than she means. She doesn’t have anything to prove to Sophie.

Sophie gives a short wave to Imani on her way out the door. Ryan flops back against the table.

“Can you believe her?” she asks Imani.

Imani bites her lip, then says, “Her, yes. You… not so much.”

Ryan glances over. “What do you mean?”

Imani drums her fingers on the table for a beat before answering. “Whatever weird competition you two have going on… maybe don’t bring it in here.”

“I didn’t—”

Imani talks over Ryan’s objection. “Having an extra instructor could be nice. Don’t drive her off just because she’s a Crow. If Jordan can vouch for her, we’ve gotta give her a chance.” She takes Ryan’s hand and squeezes it. Ryan tries to steady her breathing again. Let go of the extra energy from fighting with Sophie. “Plus, I want to meet Batwoman one day, and Sophie might be able to make that happen.”

Ryan uses her free hand to cup Imani’s cheek. “Anything Batwoman can do, I can do.”

Imani leans into the touch. “Can you throw me over your shoulder and carry me out of here?”

“Oh, you’re into that?”

“I wasn’t, until Sophie mentioned it.”

Ryan lets go of Imani’s face. “Nope. You ruined it. I’m outta here—” Ryan pushes off the table, and Imani wraps her arms around Ryan’s waist to tug Ryan back to her. Imani kisses the side of Ryan’s neck.

“Relax. You’re so sensitive today. And not the good kind.”

Ryan pouts. How is she supposed to relax when Sophie is everywhere? She’s on both of Ryan’s phones, at The Hold Up, at the loft. The only place Ryan can get away from Sophie is in her dreams. Ryan has to get rid of Sophie. And set the record straight.

“You know she didn’t carry Batwoman, right?”

Imani kisses Ryan again. “Let her have her crush, babe.”

Luke scoffs. “Not a chance.”

Ryan nods frantically. “Luke, I’m serious. Sophie has a crush on me. Not me me.” Ryan throws a hand towards the Batsuit on the mannequin. “Her me.”

Luke glances from Ryan to Mary. “I’m sorry, you called an emergency meeting because Sophie has a crush?”

Mary squints at Ryan. “It is a little extreme, Ryan.”

“She practically confessed her love to my class today. We’ve got to make it stop.”

Luke reaches a hand out. “Here’s an idea: tell her who you are.”

“Absolutely not!” Ryan says.

“I don’t know a faster way to make her rethink her feelings. If she knows it’s you, she’d drop them in a heartbeat.”

“Okay, ouch.” Ryan’s not a bad person to have a crush on. She’s sweet and attentive and affectionate. She’s dorky and vibrant, though she does get defensive at times. She’s also really hot and adorable. She’s the total package!

“No offense meant, Ryan, but come on, you and Sophie?” Luke shakes his head. “It wouldn’t work.”

The more he says it, the more that defensive streak in Ryan kicks up. She could make it work with Sophie if she wanted to. Sophie’s a badass when she’s not fighting for the wrong team. She’s super smart and quick to action, and has he seen her arms?

Ryan swipes her hand down her face to focus. “We need to get her to back off. Before she gets hurt, or blows my identity. How did Kate handle this?”

Mary says, “I’m pretty sure Kate went along with it.”

Luke agrees. “Kate was also in love with Sophie. She only broke it off because she wanted more than secret make out sessions between missions.”

Ryan hums in thought. “Maybe that’s the answer.”

“You can’t kiss her!” Mary says.

Ryan waves her off. “Not that! Kate!” She turns back for the elevator. “Thanks, Team! You’re a big help!”

“How can Kate help?” Mary calls after her. “Ryan! How!?”

a/n: any guesses on how Kate could help? Does Sophie really have a thing for Batwoman, or is everyone projecting? What do you think?

also, reply and tell me if you'd rather have a chapter asap or if you'd rather know that it's being updated on the same day

+ READ CHAPTER FOUR

#batwoman fic #batwoman #wildmoore #ryan x sophie #ryan wilder #sophie moore #batwoman: s2 #mine #fic: i know you even if you don't want me to

21 notes · View notes

onthesandsofdreams · 3 years

Text

A day to remember

Pairing: SanSan Rating: T Summary: She sits upright and lets Sandor place the tray on her lap, and can’t help the smile that comes to her face. “Yes, you’re plotting something, aren’t you?” Sandor grins, “Maybe. Now, eat, I made you cinnamon waffles with apple butter. Your coffee, of course.” Words: 1226 Notes: For @mousedetective, happy birthday sis! May your day be a good one!

Read @ AO3

Sansa knows that Sandor knows she’s not doing very well.

She hasn’t changed much, but Sandor is like a hound with prey, he smells trouble and so many other things that’s it’s near a wonder. Not that she usually minds, he’s the one who sometimes lets her know that something’s up.

But her work has been wringing her dry, and her boss… well, to be completely honest, she’s been a bitch. As much as she disliked the word, there is no other one that described Cersei Lannister on a bad mood. She’s been arriving exhausted, and she has had to wake up early and rush towards work very early.

Fortunately, the weekend is coming and her two days off are going to be a blessing. She only works them when there’s a rush, but lately, she’s been thinking of starting her own bridal fashion line, but she still needs to work it out a little bit more on Mrs. Lannister’s studio.

Friday comes and she falls asleep as soon as her head touches the pillow, she doesn’t feel Sandor coming to bed, nor she doesn’t feel him cuddling her as he lays next to her.

When she wakes up, Sandor is already out of the bed, and there is a note on her phone. She takes it and reads it, smiles when she does, Sandor is planning something and he has giving her a hint: Go shopping and come home late.

“Morning little bird,” Sandor says as he walks into the room, with a tray of food. “Saw my message?”

She sits upright and lets Sandor place the tray on her lap, and can’t help the smile that comes to her face. “Yes, you’re plotting something, aren’t you?”

Sandor grins, “Maybe. Now, eat, I made you cinnamon waffles with apple butter. Your coffee, of course.”

She blows a kiss at him, “You are the best husband.” And she begins eating, and enjoys the waffles, yes, they are frozen, but she still likes them and there’s nothing wrong with them. “Thank you.”

Sandor sits on the bed, “Listen, as you already saw my message, I have another task for you: Pick your favorite pink dress, and have it ready for when you return.”

She pauses her eating and looks at him, arches a brow, “My favorite pink dress… we’re going out?”

“Nope, that much I can tell you, but you still need an outfit for what I have planned.”

“Okay, I trust you.” And she did, Sandor was the one man besides those in her family who has never let her down. He’s the one who was very open and honest, that is one of the reasons she loved him. And she’s thankful that he had gone to rehab and therapy, they had only helped bring forth the man who he was underneath.

After she finishes eating, she changes and sends a text to Arya, who surprises her by accepting her invitation, so she takes his advice and goes out with Arya, when she’s still out with Arya, Sandor sends a message that reads: Tell me when you’re at the door.

She replies with ‘Okay.’

And she spends the rest of her day with her sister, it’s a good day. And she winds out with some new clothes, accessories, a new pair of shoes and some books. When she’s at the door of their apartment, she texts Sandor and he greets her at the door, with an eye mask.

Sandor’s a bit apologetic, “There’s a small surprise, you’ll see it soon enough.”

She doesn’t argue, she wears the mask and she allows herself to be led into the apartment. And she knows that she’s directed towards their apartment, when she’s inside their bedroom. “Change and I’ll wait for you in the living room. Just ask before coming in.” And Sandor fleds before she can turn and see him.

Deciding to leave her stuff on the corner of the room, and putting things away for tomorrow, she sets her bags aside and then goes to change. She opts for heels to compliment her dress and places her hair on a bun, she fixes her make-up and when she’s ready, she calls out, “Can I come out?”

Sandor’s voice comes from the living room, “Yes!”

So she opens the door and walks into the hallway and then stops, she stares at the living room as soon as it comes to her vision, Sandor fixed everything to make dance space, the furniture is pushed toward the corners, and there are balloons in pink and rose gold, there are roses all over the place and there is candles that are rose scented, she feels the corners of her mouth curl upwards as she stares at it and Sandor, who is in a suit and standing near a small table that hold service for two.

Sandor motions towards the table, “If you’d like to sit? I’ll bring the food right now.”

She sits and waits, Sandor doesn’t take long to come back with two plates. And while Sandor is not a great chef, he can follow a recipe without burning things and now, much to her surprise is that Sandor sets down a plate of food and they sit and enjoy it. And there are also mini cupcakes and she’s absolutely delighted.

Throughout it all, music has been playing the whole time. But after Sandor removes the plates, and returns to the living room, he goes to the player and much to her surprise, puts a song and then it shocks her even more, that he starts singing, “If you were here, I could deceive you…”

She can’t help the smile that blossoms, and takes the hand that Sandor opens, on instinct she continues the song, “And if you were here, you were believe…”

Together, they sing, “But would you suspect, my emotion wondering, yeah…”

“Do not want a part of this anymore…”

She can’t help but to appreciate the fact that Sandor has gone out of his way to make all this for her, he’s singing and dancing, and made her a fancy – as much as he could – dinner and just gave her the day off for her to recharge and have fun shopping.

They sway on each other’s arm and continue singing together. She feels content and in love, leave it to Sandor to plan a mini Sixteen Candles night for her. “Thank you,” she says as soon as the song is over.

“We still have to watch the movie,” Sandor says. “You’ve been under a lot of stress, so, today is for you.”

“I am really lucky, I’m so glad that we met and that we fell in love.” She’s still on his arms, she doesn’t want to let go, but she knows they’ll get in bed and cuddle in bed while the movie runs.

“I am a lucky bastard,” Sandor agrees. “I don’t deserve you, but I am glad you’ll have me.”

“I’ll always have you.”

“I still have more mini cupcakes, and your favorite chips and dip.”

“You, Sandor Clegane, are the absolute best husband. Aside from my father, that is.”

Sandor’s whole face grows tender, “That is high place indeed. C’mon on, lets go and watch your movie and relax.”

“Lead on, kind sir.”

Yes, today was one of those days she’ll always remember and treasure.

#sansan #sansa x sandor #Sansa Stark #Sandor Clegane #ASoIaF #asoiaf fic #au: modern #established relationship #mousedetective

9 notes · View notes

chickensarentcheap · 3 years

Text

I Found -Chapter 3

Once again, this is just being reposted as a sort of ‘celebration’ of first anniversary of both the film’s release, and the start of my series. Feel free to reblog or like or comment or DM me :)

Keep in mind, this is a year old and it’s rough and choppy, but instead of editing, I left it as is to show the difference between my stuff then, and my stuff now :)

Summary: Broken and bleeding. Weathered and in tatters. Two damaged and weary souls find one another when they least expect it. Wrong place, wrong time. Yet both powerless to stop it.

Tagging: @tragiclyhip

WARNINGS: some profanity

Link to this (and the rest of the series can be found there as well) on Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23945782/chapters/57636502

The beach is his favourite place. The sounds and smell of the ocean. The way the sunlight glistens and dances on the rippling water. It is his ultimate escape; the sun's warm and relaxing rays, the texture of the powdery sand between his toes. He's blessed to have a place like this so close to home. A place that he can share with his two most favourite people in the world. It's where they have their best conversations. Where they both feel the most relaxed; calmed by the lapping of the ways and the laughter and chatter of passing families. He sits with his legs stretched out in front of him; sunglasses on, back resting against the cooler of snacks and drinks behind him. A bottle of Gatorade on one side of him and his wife and daughter on the other.

He watches them out of the corner of his eye; the baby in the middle of the blanket enjoying some 'tummy time', clad in a white swimsuit dotted with bright rainbow fish, a tiny sunhat perched a top of her head. His wife in that simple yet sexy black one piece bathing suit, an Undearmour ball cap she'd snagged from his side of the room pulled low on her forehead, her legs folded crisscrossed and her eyes riveted on the book in her lap.

He reaches out and runs his fingers along her arm, and she casts a glance in his direction. Softly smiling as she entwines her fingers with his and places their joined hands on her thigh.

“Bloody hot today,” he says, as he runs his left hand over his face. The metal of the white gold wedding band he sports cool against his face. He takes a swig of the Gatorade and places the bottle between his thighs. Eyes closing as he leans his head back against the cooler.

He isn't sure how much time has passed when he hears her voice. Did he drift off? Did he manage to catch a half an hour of sleep? Or had it just been a few minutes? The position of the sun hasn't changed. But the baby is now on her back and Esme has abandoned the book in favour of dangling a plush singing koala over their daughter's head. The baby is starting to change; she's starting to focus more, her eyes responding to to their voices or activity going on around her. She smiles now; a smile that makes the corners of her eyes crinkle. His smile.

“There's trouble in Dhaka,” Esme says, her eyes never leaving the baby, the smile never fading. But he sees the tension in her shoulders. He hears it in her voice. She's tried to pass the comment off so smoothly and naturally. But he hears it. Loud and clear.

He sighs. “I know.”

“Apparently it is some cronies of Asif. I guess we really shouldn't be surprised. It was bound to happen. Guys like that have an army of rats behind him. I guess those rats have been hiding long enough. They're back out scurrying around and chewing shit up.”

“That's Dhaka's problem to worry about. Not ours.”

“It won't be long until it's on our doorstep. Nik will call soon. Don't be surprised.”

“She can call all the fuck she wants. There's nothing I can do to help. Best I can do is train some guys and give out advice and come up with plans. That's where I'm at these days.”

Hardly the role he played in the past. But at least it was something. He least he wasn't crippled up somewhere. Or dead. At least he could bring home some kind of pay check and provide for his family.

“You're a hundred times better than you were a year ago. And she knows that. She'll expect more from you.”

“Let her. I know my limits. I'm not the man I was a year ago. You think I'm close to it. I'm not. You have too much faith in me.”

“Well...” she sighs. “...someone has to have faith in you.”

And there it is. The honest to goodness truth. She's not saying it to be hurtful. He knows that. She's saying it because he needs to hear it.

“Why are we even talking about this?” Tyler inquires, trying not to let the aggravation seep from his voice.

“Just making conversation.”

“Bullshit. If you were just making conversation, you'd talk about the book you were reading. Or where we're going to go for lunch. Or how you wish the baby was old enough to learn how to swim and surf. That's the kind of stuff you usually talk about.”

She drags her teeth against her bottom lip. The smile is gone now. Those eyes have darkened.

“What's going on?” he presses. “You're usually the one asking me that but now it's my turn. What's wrong?”

“Ovi messaged me,” her hand tightens around his. She doesn't look at him. “While you were at the gym this morning.”

Usually he's the one that Ovi is contacting. Texts. Emails. Facetime. She and the kid are tight, but nowhere near as tight as he is with Tyler. They lived thousands of miles away but they kept the bond alive. Ovi had followed every step of his medical journey and his rehab and his struggle to get back on his feet. He'd come to their wedding. Met their daughter through a live feed. He even liked to call himself 'Uncle Ovi'. And Tyler had taken him under his wing once again. This time providing him with the guidance and the nurturing that only a father can do for their teenage son. And he was the closest thing that kid had to a father.

Ovi Sr was very much still alive. But might as well have been very much dead.

“Why? Why would he message you?”

“I guess he was worried to message you about it. I guess he was worried how you'd react. That maybe you'd get mad that he even brought it up.”

“Instead you bring it up so I can get mad at you.”

She frowns “That's is not why I brought it up. I didn't want this turning into a fight, Tyler. I wasn't trying to make you mad.”

“I'm not mad,” he assures her. “Annoyed as fuck, but not mad.”

Sighing, she finally looks at him. And he hates what he sees. That haunted look that registers on every inch of her face. And he hates himself for being that one that put it there. And out of reassurance, he lifts their joined hands to his lips and presses a kiss to the inside of her wrist.

“He's worried,” she says. “He's been getting phone calls. Messages. Letters.”

“From who?”

“He doesn't know. He doesn't recognize the writing.”

“What do they say?”

“They're threats mostly. About watching his back. Needing eyes on the back of his head. How is big, bad bodyguard isn't around any more. I think they think you're dead.”

“Good. Let them think that.”

“He's worried, Tyler. He's scared. He's lost. He doesn't know what to do.”

“I'll call him later. I'll help him figure something out.”

“I told him that maybe he should come here, but he doesn't want to leave home. And he has friends and school and it wouldn't be fair to him to give all the up and come to Australia.”

“I said I'd figure something out. I always do.”

“I mean, he said he'd come here if he had to. But he doesn't want to be that far from his dad. Not like he has anything to do with his father, but still.”

“He already has guys watching him. I'll talk to Nik. Get a few more sent over there.”

“It won't matter how many she sends or how many are there. None of them are you.”

Fuck me, he thinks, and once more wishes for a drink. Something strong. Something powerful enough to wash down that uneasiness that sits in his throat. It settles in his chest; gnaws at his stomach.

“We're not talking about this,” he says. “Not here. Not now. Not ever.”

“He's in trouble, Tyler. You can't ignore that.”

“Didn't you hear me the first time? I said I'd get Nik to send more guys there. We're not going down this road. We're not talking about this.”

“You're the only one he trusts. That he fully trusts.”

“Is this really the hill you want to die on? I love you and I'd lay down my life for you. In a heartbeat. But you need to stop. Stop while you're ahead. Because this is a rabbit hole you do not want to fall down.”

“You can try and push this way. You can try and push me away. But this is happening. This is a real threat. Real trouble. And he trusts you, Tyler. He needs you.”

“And I love that kid like my own. You know that. But you know who also needs me? You know who needs me more than he does? My family. My wife. My child. They need me way more than he does. And I'm not fucking good to either of you when I'm thousands of miles away.”

“I didn't say you have to go alone.”

He gives an incredulous laugh. “Are you fucking kidding me right now? Are you listening to yourself? Are you hearing what you're saying? This is fucking ridiculous,” he huffs, and yanking his hand out of hers, attempts to get to his feet. But she grabs him by the forearm with a surprising amount of strength and forces him to sit back down.

“We ARE having this conversation,” her voice is low. Eyes narrowed. “We ARE talking about this. Because it damn well needs to be talked about. Now. Not later. Because you damn well know that call is going to come. That Nik is going to call and she's going to say all the things I just said. And you'll listen to her. Because for some reason you seem to ignore me but listen to her.”

“Don't start that shit. She's your friend. Just because her and I had a thing a long time ago, doesn't mean fuck all now. That's the past. You're the present. The future. So don't be bringing petty, childish shit into this. Into our marriage. Don't play those fucking games with me. You've got the wrong guy for that shit.”

“She's going to call. And she's going to say everything I just did. And you know what, Tyler? She'll be right. Just like I am. You can try and ignore this. You can try and pretend that you don't care. But I know you. Better than you know yourself half the time. And if I didn't think this was serious...if I didn't think there was real trouble...I wouldn't bring this up at all. But Ovi needs you.”

“What can I do for him? Huh? What the fuck can I do? Look at me. I mean really look at me. Past that fucking vision you have of me that you can't seem to let go of. That man...that man you first met...he's dead. He's gone. I can't help him. I can barely help you. Or our daughter.”

“Now who is talking shit?” she retorts. “You need to stop this, Tyler. You need to stop beating yourself up like this. You're the bravest man I've ever known. The strongest I've ever met. Look how far you've come. Look at how well you're doing. If anyone can help, it's you. It's what you do. You help people.”

“When I'm not fucking people up and killing them, you mean?”

“You can't pretend that side of you never existed,” she argues. “You can't pretend that he isn't still inside of you. It's possible, you know. To be this Tyler and THAT Tyler.”

“I cross that line again, I might not be able to cross back. And then what? I become the old Tyler and this life is over. Could you really live with that guy? Be married to him? Have a family with him? Any normal future? Why the hell would you want to?”

“Maybe because I love you, you insufferable pain in the ass. Maybe because I knew the old Tyler. That's the Tyler I fell in love with. The Tyler that reeled me in. And this Tyler...the Tyler you are now...that's just a bonus. But I don't pretend that the other Tyler never existed. He isn't dead to me. He's very much alive. And you know he is. Why do you fight it?”

“Because that isn't who I want to be any more,” he snarls. “That isn't the man I want to be. I want to be a better man. For you.”

“And you are. But I need that old Tyler. And so does Ovi.”

“Jesus fucking Christ...” he mutters, and puts a hand to his forehead as he closes his eyes. He tries to calm himself. Long, slow, deep breaths that he exhales slowly. “I can not believe we are actually talking about this.”

“I figured it would be the best time do it. When you were relaxed and calm and...”

“Don't you think something should have told you that this was the wrong fucking place? The wrong fucking time?” he doesn't even try to bite back the vehemence on his tongue. “This couldn't wait? Until we were home? You had to do this here? Like what the fuck?”

Silence falls between them. He can't remember the last time that a silence was this uncomfortable between them. They rarely fought other than the stupid shit that couples quarrel over. And he very rarely raised his voice towards her. Normally he could walk away before it got that far. But now he felt helpless. Cornered. The last bit of control slipping through his fingers.

“This is bullshit,” he grumbles, and sips at the Gatorade He can't look at her. He just can't. The rage is too raw. And it absolutely disgusts him that he feels that way towards her. “Why would you do this?” his voice is low as his eyes survey the horizon. The sparkling blue water, the clouds that hang low in the sky, the people that frolic in the surf. “Why the hell would you bring this up? Not just here. But at all.”

“I wouldn't have brought it up if it wasn't serious,” she sounds like she's going to cry. Or strangle him. Maybe even both. “Tyler...please...please look at me...”

“I can't,” fuck he hates himself. He despises feeling this way. Especially towards her. “I just can't.”

“You have to. Please. Please look at me.”

He inhales a sharp breath and then exhales solely before turning to look at her. Keeping those sunglasses on so she can't see the tears that threaten. Tears of anger. Frustration. Regret. So many emotions that he detests.

“He needs you, Tyler. Ovi needs you.”

“I can't help him. You know that. What the hell do you expect me to do?”

“I expect you do what you need to do. You were a mercenary. You still are. That part is never going to disappear. No matter how hard you try. “

“I can't go down that road again. I can't. I have too much to lose.”

“You aren't going to lose us. I'm not going anywhere. She's not going anywhere. We're in this together. The three of us.”

“I'm not putting you in danger. Not again. Especially not now. We have a family. We have a baby. That needs us. That isn't a life she deserves to be dropped into it. She's just a baby.”

“And she trusts you. I trust you. With my life. With both of our lives. You have to do this Tyler. And I think you know that. And deep down I think you want to.”

“I can't lose you. I can't lose her. I just can't. I can't make those mistakes again.”

“I'm not your ex wife Tyler. And she isn't your son. You have to stop letting that eat you up. You can't change the past. You can't go back and change things. You just can't. And that guilt and that regret? It's only going to keep eating at you. Killing yourself isn't going to bring him back. And I know you'll never see yourself the way that I do. You're always going to think that I have too much faith in you. But I'm never going to hate you the way that you hate yourself. No matter how hard you try.”

He nods slowly, the words hitting home. It isn't the first time they'd had this conversation. But it's the first time she's been this brutally honest.

“Sometimes...” she draws in a shaky breath. “..sometimes I feel like I left you behind on that bridge. That you're here but I still lost you.”

“Well you didn't. And if you ask me, you're the one that's hanging onto this. You can't let it go. You just can't let it go, can you.” It's a statement more than a question.

“I don't know how you expect me to. I almost lost you. You almost died in my arms. How do I let that go?”

“You fucking remind yourself that I didn't die. That I'm here. You remind yourself until you're sick of hearing it. And then you remind yourself a million times more.”

“It's not that easy,” she shakes her head. “But I wish it was.”

He reaches for her. Yanking off her ball cap and tossing it to the ground, then laying a hand on the back of her head and pulling her into him. She nestles her face in the spot between his neck and his shoulder. That favourite little spot of hers that made her feel safe and warm. And he wraps both arms around slender body and presses a kiss to the top of her head.

“Loving her doesn't mean any you don't love him anymore,” she says,

“How did we get back onto this? Quit going back and forth with things. You're confusing the shit out of me.”

“I know it's what you think. You think because she's here and you love her as much as you do, it means that you're going to forget him. That you're love for him will somewhat diminish. He'd want you to move on, Tyler. He'd want you to be happy. You have so much love to give. I know you don't see yourself that way. But I do. And I bet he did too.”

He doesn't want to talk about it. Not here. Not ever, to be honest. But she is the one person he CAN talk about these things with. The one person that won't judge him. Who won't make him feel like an enormous prick for making the decisions that he did.

“He would have made a really good big brother,” he muses. “He would have loved her. And she would have loved him. I'm sure of it.”

It's a comforting thought. But the reality of the situation was that if his son hadn't died, his daughter more than likely wouldn't be here. And neither would Esme. His first marriage may have worked out. And he definitely wouldn't have been hell bent on destroying himself. There'd be no Nik. No Ovi. And there would have been no G, or the rest of the team, or Gaspar.

So many things would be different. And despite the pain and mistakes of the past, he quite enjoys where his life is now. A wife, a child, possibly more in the future. And they wouldn't be sitting here on this beach if he hadn't had made the decision to go to Afghanistan while his son was dying .

It is truly amazing how one decision can change the entire course of your future.

“You're suffocating me,” she mutters against him. Completely unaware of how tight his hold on her had actually been.

“That's for all the times you made me drink kale smoothies and watch chick flicks,” he teases, dropping a kiss on the top of her head and tousling her hair.

“I only made you drink smoothies because that's how I hid the Viagra,” she playfully retorts.

“Of all the things you know would wound me, you pick the worst one?” he pinches her in the side; tickling her until she's giggling hysterically, out of breath and struggling to get away. “What a bitch move. Going right for the manhood. Right for the juggler.”

“I guess I learned from the best,” she says, and then shrieks and elbows him in the gut when he pinches the flesh at her hip. “Don't be such a dick,” she pouts dramatically.

“I'd make a comment about my dick but you'll accuse me of being a pig and apparently you think I need Viagra so you're never getting the dick ever again.”

“And you say I go for the juggler. That's harsh, Tyler. That is super fucking harsh.”

He gets her in that sensitive spot right behind the knee. Squeezing what little flesh there is until she's flat on her back and using her feet in his gut to try and push him away. Until they're both laughing and passerbys are shooting them curious glances; some shaking their heads at the silliness from grown adults, others smiling along with them. And when he brings on of her feet to her face and bites at one of her toes, she gives a yelp that's loud enough to startle the baby from her nap.

“Now look what you've done,” Esme huffs, as she straightens her bathing suit. “You've woken the beast.”

“She's fine. And don't you talk about my daughter like that. She's a princess. Daddy's princess.”

“A princess who will be able to kick some major ass when she's older.”

“That's the plan,” confirms, and then lays down on his stomach alongside of the baby, resting a hand on her stomach. “Don't listen to that mean old lady. Calling you a beast like that. When she's the one that is a total bitch half the time.”

“Takes one to know one,” his wife shoots back, then lies down on her side across from him. Their tiny daughter safe and secure between them. Esme's hand comes to rest on his; thumb stroking his wrist and the base of his fingers. “Tell me everything is going to be okay, Tyler. Tell me that WE'RE going to be okay.”

“We will,” he promises. “We'll be fine.”

He only hopes he sounds more convincing to her ears than he does to his own

#Tyler Rake #Tyler Rake fan fiction #Extraction fan fiction #Chris Hemsworth #Chris Hemsworth Extraction #Chris Hemsworth Tyler Rake #Tyler Rake fan fic #Extraction fan fic #Tyler Rake x OFC #tyler and esme series

1 note · View note

certain-as-the-sun · 4 years

Text

Hey Jealousy

A High School-is AU. Inspired by the Gin Blossoms’ song of the same name. Contains: Alcohol Abuse, miscarriage, unwanted sexual touching.

Hey Jealousy

Tell me do you think it'd be all right If I could just crash here tonight You can see I'm in no shape for driving And anyway I've got no place to go And you know it might not be that bad You were the best I'd ever had If I hadn't blown the whole thing years ago I might not be alone

It was a rainy night. Belle sat in her father’s house on the edge of town, far enough away that she got the peace and quiet she craved, but still close enough that running errands into town wouldn’t take all day. She sat in her favorite chair, a hot mug of tea steaming beside her. Her bookcase gleamed in the firelight, beckoning her to choose from her vast collection. Tonight was a night she didn’t want to dwell on. Five years ago her whole world changed. Her first love had been lost to her. Her true love if she still believed in fairy tales. They had been so good together. They had their lives figured out. She would finish school, open her bookshop and live happily ever after. Fate it seemed, was not as kind. The accident wasn’t Adam’s fault. He knew that, but it didn’t stop people from talking. Small town like theirs, it didn’t take long for word to spread about the group of teenage boys who took a joy ride that left one dead.

Adam never could hold his alcohol. He tried so many times to quit. Rehab, counseling. Through it all, there had been Belle. She was the one constant in his ever changing life. He was trying. He was trying to be who he needed to be, who Belle needed him to be. But there are some demons that are just too hard to get rid of. Orphaned at ten, bounced around from home to home. He was an angry young man, a temper that could explode at the smallest of things. He starting drinking at a young age, stealing what he could from his less than desirable foster parents. He fell in with the wild crowd. The kind of boys who stole cars, drank, partied hard. It landed him in a group home for at-risk boys.

He was adopted at sixteen by an older gay couple. Cogsworth and Lumiere could not have been more opposite in their manners and appearance. Cogsworth was portly and fussy. Lumiere was flamboyant and loud. Between them, they showered Adam with the love and acceptance he had so desperately needed. They got him into AA, helped him find a good sponsor, someone Adam could always call when and if he needed to talk to someone other than his dads. Hatter whose real name Adam never knew, had been a foster kid too, adopted as an older teen. Hatter understood the pressure Adam felt, the loneliness that came from a life spent apart. Between the three men loving Adam he was able to stay clean for over a year.

Belle was an only child to a widowed clockmaker. She was an honor student, on the fast track to the Ivy League. They met when Cogsworth signed Adam up for an English tutor. Cogsworth valued education and wanted Adam to improve so he could attend college and make something of himself. At first Adam and Belle wanted nothing to do with each other. He didn’t think he needed a tutor and not one as attractive as Belle was. His teenage brain envisioned her as the naughty librarian he had seen in dirty magazines. Acting on horrid advice from his friends, he was rude and demeaning. His efforts were rewarded with a slap and disgust. At home that evening, he sought out better advice. Cogsworth told the boy to write her an apology. Lumiere told him to bring her a rose. Hatter, the straight man in his life agreed that Adam had treated Belle poorly, asked him what he was going to do about it. Adam had to do better.

And better he did. He apologized, profusely. Belle wasn’t sure she could trust him. She knew who he hung around with. But they started spending time together. Little by little the real Adam shone through. Behind the tough as nails exterior he showed the world, he allowed Belle to see him. He could very kind to those in need. He organized toy drives for foster kids. Once at the store when the cloud let loose a deluge of water, he offered to pull her car up for an elderly woman so she wouldn’t get drenched to the bone.

He still had his temper. If his temper got the better of him, Belle wouldn’t stand for it. More times she left him where he was standing when he was losing it. He’d never hurt her but she wouldn’t take that chance. He scared her badly one night. They had been in his room and she had accidentally knocked over a framed photograph. The glass broke and damaged the photo. He roared with anger and before he realized what was happening he had tossed everything from his desk and slammed his fist into the wall. She ran from the room. In his angered haze, he heard her cries from the living room. He stopped thrashing and stepped into the hall. She was still there. Seated on the couch, his dads on either side of her. Cogsworth shook his head at his son.

Anger management with Hatter came next. He never wanted to see anyone he cared about be subject to his temper. He wrote Belle a letter, even mailed it. He never knew if she read it but she did forgive him.

The day of the accident started bad. His anniversary of sobriety was coming up. He would be two years clean. A milestone for any addict. It was little things piling up to big things. A memory of his parents, long gone from his life. A bad grade on a test he and Belle had studied so hard for. An argument between Adam and Cogsworth about grades and school. A misunderstanding between Lumiere. The anger simmered to a full boil. A temper flare from Adam had him storming out of the house. Deep in the back of his mind he knew what he had to do. He needed to call Hatter. Get his head on straight.

He could call Belle. But she was busy. She had an interview in the morning. An interview that could make or break her college plans. She didn’t need him distracting her. Maybe she would let him just sleep in her bed while she prepared. If he was with her, he could calm down and be able to go home and apologize. If he was with her he wouldn’t be able to do something stupid. Pausing over her contact, a text popped up.

Pre-game with boys. Don’t be a wuss.

He had been ducking texts like these for weeks. Gaston was from his old life. A life he didn’t want anymore. Gaston had been his best friend once upon a time. Before his dads. Before Hatter. Before Belle. Adam dropped Gaston soon after he began seeing Belle near constantly. Belle hated Gaston. She found his crass and chauvinistic behavior revolting. Rumor has it he had three kids with three different girls.

When he and Belle first started dating, he took her to a party that Gaston was throwing. He had taken over his parents cabin in the woods. Everyone from school was there, even people from other schools that had heard about the bash in the woods. Cars lined the dirt road leading up to the cabin. You could hear the party before you saw it. Belle, to put it plainly was not a party girl. Her idea of a Friday night was spent at the small bookstore on Main Street, browsing and putting books on layaway. Mrs. Potts, the owner kept a log of Belle’s books and would sometimes write off a few when she needed to. Belle was happiest when she and Adam had dinner together at the cafe next door to the bookstore and just took a walk in the park. But she agreed. Adam had been doing so well and she thought it was only fair that she share in his world when he spent so much time in hers.

Gaston saw them first. The feeling between Gaston and Belle was mutual. He blamed her for changing Adam from the guy he was to the guy he is. Behind her back he called her a bitch, a nag, killjoy. The tall, broad teenager with coal black hair strode up to them as they entered the house, a bottle of beer in his hand. He snapped his fingers at Kevin to get Adam a drink. He saw red when Belle took Adam’s hand and shook her head when the small portly boy offered them both bottles. He was going to take her down a peg or two.

It took some time but he finally got Adam and Belle separated. She had gotten tree sap on her hand when they had gone outside. She was expecting Adam to be waiting for her outside the bathroom when she came back out from washing her hands. But he wasn’t. He had gotten pulled into a conversation with Gaston’s latest blonde. She started towards him when Gaston got in her path.

“Never thought little miss perfect would grace us with her presence,” Gaston taunted. “Thought you were too good to hang out with the likes of us.” He leaned closer to her, pushing her back against the wall. “Not sure what my boy Adam sees in a frigid bitch like you.”

His breath reeked of stale beer, corn ships and tobacco. He ran his hand over her bare shoulder, she had lost her sweater somewhere. She tried to move out Gaston’s way but he caged her. “Gaston, please. Just leave us alone.”

“I want to know what kind of spell you got my boy under,” he said, his hand moving its way down her body, over her. Tears stung her eyes. Where was Adam? “Maybe if I get a taste, I might understand.”

“Stop it, please.”

Across the room Adam caught sight of his girlfriend. He pushed through the crowd of drinking people. Gaston had Belle pressed against the wall, his hands on her. Without thinking he charged at Gaston shoving him away from Belle.

“Get away from her!” Adam all but growled. He kept himself between Belle and Gaston, his fists balled. “What the hell is wrong with you?!”

“She came on to me man!” Gaston argued. “I told you. I warned you about her. She’s a bitch. You’re better off without her.”

“Adam let’s just go,” Belle said, putting her hand on his arm. “He’s not worth it. Let’s just go.”

“Shut up, you stupid —“ Gaston didn’t get a chance to finish his sentence. Adam swung his fist forward and knocked his former best friend square in his jaw.

“You will not speak to my girlfriend like that ever again,” Adam said. He took Belle’s hand and they left. Alone in her car he held her close as she cried. No one had ever touched her like that before. Not even Adam. “Baby, I’m so sorry. I’d never come if I thought that’s what he’d do. Please, I’m so sorry.”

Staring at the text, it was a siren’s call. If he was honest with himself, he did miss his friend. Hanging with he boys would be the easy choice. It would be so easy to just fall into a stupor with the boys. He wouldn’t have to think about anything else. Not school, not his dads, not even Hatter. He knew what he needed to do. The siren call was stronger. He wanted to go. He wanted to fall into oblivion. He could fall for one night and when the dust settled he would start over. That was the life an addict. He knew what he needed to do and did what he wanted. He made the easy choice.

Where you at? Three words. That’s all it took to ruin his life. Three words.

The ravine. And don’t bring that bitch.

Don’t call her that.

Three hours later Adam had fallen off the wagon hard. He had drunk two bottles of Stoli, his hard liquor of choice and finished off a six pack of a cheap beer Stanley brought. Once he started Adam couldn’t stop. He couldn't have just one drink. He would keep going until he couldn’t see straight. When Adam polished off what they others had brought they went to get more. Driving a town over and with Stanley’s fake ID and Cogsworth’s credit card, the boys loaded up with more. Two more bottles of Stoli down and Adam was drunker than he had been in his life.

Neither Adam or Gaston had any business driving. The only sober one among the boys that night was Kevin also known as LeFou. Kevin was Gaston’s lackey. The small, overweight, nerdy boy just wanted to be popular. He did Gaston’s homework, really anything Gaston wanted. He was in the backseat with Adam that night. Gaston sped down the road, the radio screaming profanity laced rock. Reckless and stupid. Empty bottles rolled around the back of the car. They were invincible. On top of the world. Until they weren’t.

No one was sure as to the exact nature of the accident that left one dead, two severely injured and one with minor cuts and scrapes. Kevin, the sweet boy who just wanted to belong was dead. Stanley walked away. Gaston had severe brain damage and would likely require twenty-four/seven care for the rest of his life. Adam broke his right collarbone, the three bones in his right arm, the femur of his right leg and had broken glass embedded in his face. Scars he would bear for the rest of his life.

Belle, Hatter and his dads sat constant vigil by his side while he recovered from surgery. His handsome face distorted and scarred from the accident. Mixed emotions filled Belle. Anger, betrayal, hurt, sadness. How could he do this? Interview or not, he could have called her. Should have called her. In fact, he had called her. Several times. The first time she answered. She heard the shouts and loud music in the background. In his slurred speech he told her how much he loved her and how he was sorry. She begged him to tell her where he was. She would come get him and take him home. Get him to Hatter and his dads. Get him sober again. He wouldn’t listen. After the calls ended, texts came through. At first they were from Adam. Drunken decelerations of love. Disjointed thoughts of an unclear mind. Then they changed. They called her names, demeaned her. She turned her phone off. Adam had to be beyond reason if he let Gaston talk to her in such a way.

Adam and Stanley had to be the ones to face the music when it came down to blame for the accident. They each took a lesser sentence, community service, mandatory rehab, counseling and they were expelled. Adam became the worst version of himself. Guilt over took him. He withdrew into himself, became bitter, letting his anger consume him. If he did speak to anyone, there was no kindness in his words. Belle stood by him, did her best to help him through the darkness. Her breaking point came during her second year of college. He had done well over the holidays. He was getting better. So when the stick said Pregnant she was able to think to the future again. They had taken their lives day by day for the last two years. She could see a glimmer of hope in their darkness.

Fate, cruel as always, laughed. He had been working at the grocery store when she came in. Gaston’s mother. Seeing Adam whole set her grief anew. He stood there unmoving as she berated him, blamed him for everything that happened that night. Her son wouldn’t do the things they had said about him. Adam was a dirty orphan who drug her son down with him. Management lead her away from him but the damage had been done. In a stupor he walked out of the store grabbing a bottle of his poison on the way out. He missed her calls. Ignored them. Ignored everyone as he drank himself stupid again.

Belle was done. She could only watch him destroy himself for so long. And losing her child was the final straw.

“I won’t sit by and watch you drink yourself to death,” she said. “I can’t do it anymore.”

The last time she saw Adam, he had passed out on her dorm room floor. The last she heard he’d voluntarily checked himself into an in patient clinic. Belle kept in contact with Lumiere and Cogsworth. They came to her graduation when her own father was too ill to make the drive. They stood by her when she lost her father. The two men rarely mentioned Adam except in passing. He was out of rehab. Seemed to be doing well. He was working. Stocking shelves at a big box store. Somewhere he didn’t have to see customers.

Belle sighed away the memories and stood up from her chair and took out her favorite book. A leather bound copy of Sense and Sensibility. Opening it at random, dried flowers fell from the pages. Tucked between another page was a yellowing piece of notebook paper. A letter. A letter from Adam in the Before.

My Belle,

It feels so great to be able to call you mine. I know I’m not the easiest guy you could be with. I’m so grateful that you are. As promised, I’m doing better. Learning to take a breath to settle my anger before speaking. I need to explain what happened. The photo in my room, was my mother. The only thing I managed to keep throughout my childhood and moves. I am so sorry that I lost my temper. It wasn't acceptable behavior and I know that. I am going to forever be working on myself, to be who you need me to be.

I love you, Belle. Don’t give up on me.

Yours always,

Adam

She slid the letter back into the book. That Adam was long gone. He had a way with words. One minute he was a master poet, extolling words of love and devotion. But there was the other side of the coin. His words, when used in anger could tear a person down and leave them shattered. But that was then. She was a different person now.

You can trust me not to think And not to sleep around If you don't expect too much from me You might not be let down Cause all I really want is to be with you Feeling like I matter too If I hadn't blown the whole thing years ago I might be here with you

His shift was ending. He didn’t have anywhere to be. His dads had taken a cruise, trusting they could leave Adam home alone for the first time in years. He didn’t have many friends that he could call to see if they wanted to grab a bite. In fact not counting Hatter, he didn’t have anyone he could call anymore. He took out his phone to check the time. It was just after eight. Jack in the Box would still be open. He could go there, eat a cheap burger and fries and go home. He smiled sadly looking at the picture that was a perfect moment in time. Belle. Lumiere had taken the photo. Together on the tire swing in the backyard. They had been so happy. Back when she was still his. Back before everything went to hell.

He still had her number in his phone. He never called it. He was sure she’d hang up on him before he ever got a word spoken. That was if she hadn’t blocked his number altogether. There was so much he wanted to tell her. To apologize for. He loved her. Loved her enough that he would be okay if she never came back to him. Not that the sting of jealousy didn’t bite him in the ass when he saw her with someone else.

He had seen her from afar so many times over the years. She still called his dads when something good happened to her. They would always tell him if she was coming over or if they had talked to her. Adam never asked Cogsworth or Lumiere to say he was thinking of her. That he still loved her with all the passion he still had. He wouldn’t do that to her. Not again.

He found himself walking in the rain. After the accident, he never drove again. He wasn’t sure where he was going until he found himself outside her house. She was sitting in front of the fire reading, like she always did. Taking a breath, he walked away from the window and to the front door. He pressed the doorbell and waited.

Belle never imagined who would be on the other side of her door.

“Adam?”

“Belle.” No matter how many years passed by, Adam saying her name was enough to send shockwaves through her whole body.

“What are you doing here?” she asked.

“I know if I hadn’t messed up that night, I wouldn’t be standing out here in the rain,” he said, his blue eyes staring at her. “There are so many things that I’ve done that I’m not proud of. Hurting you, driving you away will always be on the top of my list.”

“You really hurt me, Adam. How can I ever trust you again?”

He fished something out of his pocket. A bronze colored coin. Belle had seen the collection of sobriety coins Hatter had. Hatter was eighteen years sober. So often they just wanted to get Adam to thirty days. Thirty days. Then to ninety days. To a hundred and eighty. To one year. The bronze coin in his hand had a 2 stamped in the center of it.

“Two years, yesterday Belle,” he said. “730 days. Dad and Pop came to the meeting. Hatter actually cried.”

Two years. Belle tried to imagine Hatter crying. The thought made her giggle. She caught his eye and in an instant it was like they were seventeen again. He pulled her to him, expression nervous but hopeful as he waited for her to make the next move. Maybe it was too much to hope he would take her back so soon. But she had to know. Had to know there would never be another for him. She was it. He would spend the rest of his life making up for the last five years of hell he put them through. He needed and wanted her with every fiber of being. She must have seen it, weighed the consequences in her own mind. Seconds passed and her lips crashed into his, igniting a passion she had long buried. He walked her backwards into the house, kicking the door closed behind them. Between their increasingly fervent kisses, he was apologizing.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there when Maurice died,” he said as she pulled his wet coat from him. “I’m sorry for passing out in your yard.”

“Adam, if you list everything you’re sorry for, you’ll be here until Christmas.”

Christmas sounded good to Adam. He could spend a Christmas with Belle. A birthday with Belle. God, was this really happening? Was she really there? He had to be sure.

“Am I really here?” he whispered into her hair, holding her close to him.

“Yes, you’re really here. I’m here.” Belle traced the marks on his face.

“You can count on me now, Belle. I’ve never stopped loving you.”

“Prove it.”

A low chuckle escaped his throat as he kissed her again. He drank her in, every sight, every scent mixing with memories. Lifting her into his arms holding her close. He pressed her against the wall, his lips finding all the places that brought her pleasure. The places only he knew. Her legs wrapped around him, as if they had never been apart.

Her senses came back to her first. She shouldn’t be doing this. She shouldn’t let him back into her life. She knew the risks and her heart could only break so many times.

“Wait, Adam. Stop. Put me down,” she said. With her feet on the ground, her head was coming out of the clouds.

“Belle? Aren’t you happy I’m back?”

“Oh, Adam,” she sighed. “I have wanted nothing but for you to be sober and happy. But I can’t be the root of your happiness. I won’t survive it again.”

He nodded. He’d heard this before, from his fathers, from Hatter. He expected it from Belle. She had been hurt the most by his actions. Because she could walk away.

“I understand Belle. I do. It will take more than just words and promises. Because I’ve said and done things that I am not proud of. I’ve hurt you. The last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt you. I love you.”

He took out his phone, opening the notes app. Scrolling down he found a letter he had written to her during his final rehab stay. He began to read.

“My dearest Belle, there is nothing that I can say that will ever make up for my behavior. There is nothing I regret more. I lie here in my bed thinking about what — no not what — who we lost. Who they could have been if they’d had a better father. I will never forgive myself for walking away. Walking away from you, from what you meant — mean to me. I am so sorry that you were alone. I am sorry that my selfish wants overtook me when you needed me most. Nothing I can ever do will make up for that. In the worst moment of your — our lives, you were alone. And that is not right. It will never be right. And if you can ever forgive me, I will work forever to earn back your love and your trust. And even if you never can, knowing that I tried will be enough for me. I love you Belle. I love you enough to walk away if that’s what you want from me.”

He stopped reading and looked up at her. “What do you want Belle?”

She didn’t even hesitate. “You. Demons and all.”

#hey jealousy #beauty and the beast #beauty and the beast fan fic #gin blossoms #inspired by music

20 notes · View notes

polygamyff · 4 years

Text

45. Part 2

I am not going to lie; I am so scared right now. What could Maurice mean by family crisis, what family crisis is he speaking about. I am actually so scared of what is happening or what is to come, Maurice didn’t sound upset with me. He didn’t sound like I was in trouble, he just wanted me back home but I am still so scared on what is to come, what is happening or what had happened while I was gone. I was slightly scared when I got the phone call, what if it was Reign but I know what Maurice is like with her, he is very over protective with her, he does not allow anyone near her besides himself actually, he does love her so much and maybe I am being selfish, maybe I am selfish but all I wanted was some attention from him, it wasn’t hard. I just wanted Maurice to show me some attention at night, especially at night but he didn’t give me that but now I am all nervous, this family crisis. Does this make me a Davenport now, I mean I am a Davenport, but does this mean I am more of a Davenport now, I am so nervous “mother, I am nervous. I can’t help it” I can’t blame myself because it’s not my issue, this is all so new to me “don’t be stressing yourself out, Robbie it’s not about you honestly. If it was, Maurice wouldn’t be saying love you? I mean you said it back?” I chuckled “you right, but I need a nervous pee” and we are outside the home now, it’s still standing and nothing has happened outside my beautiful home, I cannot thank Maurice enough for getting me such a beautiful home “this is it” I said as I got out of the car, locking my car door as I made my way around the car “stop being like this Robbie, I bet it is nothing. I bet his family is here” I suppose, my mother could be right, and it could be just something so simple.

The door unlocked, this keyless entry is the best, I love it. Pushing open the door, I jumped back. Maurice is sat in the gallery, he has been waiting for me “hey” Maurice got up from the chair “I have been waiting for you” look at my daughter, once again he has her in her diaper, he just loves doing this “daddy hates putting clothes on you don’t he” Reign got ever so excited seeing me “come here” pressing a kiss to Reign’ cheek and taking her from him “missed you baby, is everything ok?” I asked while fixing Reign in my arms, she is attacking my earrings already. She does not wait at all to do this “please don’t do this” I mumbled, Reign grinned at me “well I got a knock on the door, checked the cameras and I saw my brother, my dad and mom outside the home. I was not happy to see him, I came down and my dad said he wants to speak to me about this, I said no he fucked with my family. Jay is with him in that room with my mom and dad. I said I ain’t doing shit, this is my day you’re ruining it. My dad said he wants to speak to me, I said fuck you. You upset Robyn too, you’re in her home. I said I will get Robyn and you speak to both of us, like why now? I am upset about this” letting out an oh, my mom came into my eye view “let me take Reign, you deal with this” nodding my head as my mom took Reign “so he’s in there right now?” I pointed at the rooms that were meant for the maid and security “yes, but I wanted you here. I needed you here, you make me think. You know” nodding my head “so I’m needed?” Maurice chuckled “you always are, is that the issue?” I smiled “just come on, let’s go” I am nervous now, his brother is here. He is on drugs and in my home, this is not good at all “but seriously, Robyn. Are you upset because of me not giving you attention? Baby you know I love you” I just smiled putting my head down “I just missed you Maurice, that is it. Just let’s deal with this” I said.

Walking behind Maurice as we got into the room, I am hiding behind Chris right now more then anything because honestly I haven’t seen Malik since that time and it’s just bad memories “Robyn, how are you?” Joy said, oh god. After what Maurice said about his mom letting him go “uh hi” I smiled, I hit into Maurice’ back “what are you doing?” Maurice said, looking up at him “nothing” I laughed nervously “where is Reign? Maurice you cannot hide her just because I bought Malik here” seeing Malik finally, ok he is a mess and they really did beat his ass “oh my god” I said under my breath, Malik is sat right next to Marquis and Jay is stood right on the other side, he isn’t going anywhere far “well he is in my home, why? You can speak now” Maurice said, he is so annoyed. I can tell he is “what do you want me to say Maurice, you can see your brother right? You are not blind, you need to look after family Maurice, I know what he did but he needs help just like you do. Please Maurice listen to me! He is my son and I can’t let him rot. Look at him” Marquis said “he tried to ruin my life, he tried to kill me or even Robyn and you want me to help him? I don’t care” Malik is very quiet “I want to be like you, yes dad” Malik slurred out, is he high right now “like me? Right, you never saved me so why should I save you?” Maurice said, he stepped ahead of me staring at Malik “save you how? I can’t fight him” Malik hit Marquis’ shoulder, he got up from the bed side but Jay pushed him back, not my beds, I don’t want nothing damaged in my home “hit me again!” Malik is on something, grabbing Maurice’ arm but Maurice is not caring “just sit down ok” Jay said “Maurice, please. Please help him, he is sorry” Marquis said.

I feel like Malik will ruin my home and I want him to just go “he said he wanted to come and see you; he is not well son. He did what he did because he is lost, just like you were” Joy explained “don’t! Do not bring up my past when you want me to help him” Maurice snapped at his mom “please, I don’t want to be like this. Look at me, please Maurice. I beg you; I will get on my knees” Malik flopped down to his knees “you’re no brother of mine, I don’t have one. I can’t ever trust you” Maurice said “then kill me” I don’t like any of this, I have Joy crying and Malik on his knees “Maurice, please talk to me. Come, let’s talk” I said walking towards the door, dragging open the door. Turning around waiting for Maurice to come out behind me, he finally did “this is why I wanted you to come here, I just hate it. They gang up on me, what do they want me to do? My dad cares for me, he loves me but he is all about putting face” cross my arms across my chest “come closer” I said, he is ranting on too loudly “tell me what should I do?” Maurice said in a whisper “he ain’t said sorry to you, to me. Not like he meant it even if he did so tell me what should I do? I will take your advice because I trust you, but you see how they gang up on me? It’s full of shit, it’s like I have to do it because I have to keep the family name there, fuck them!” Maurice is very angry “how come you let him in the home?” I asked “because my dad was there! I couldn’t do that Robyn, I don’t want to help him” this is difficult, his dad wants him to do it and I don’t think he will take any other answer, taking in a deep breath thinking on this, pacing off to think.

Maurice won’t stop, like he is being so loud “Maurice, stop!” I spat, walking over to him “stop, just calm down please, come here” walking over to him “it’s not that, Robyn why should I? Please tell me this, he tried to kill you, me, and maybe my daughter. I don’t know” hugging him “and at that point he was not well, are you going to listen to me?” Maurice sighed out “you are always the most forgiving though” moving back from the hug, holding his arms looking up at him “because my mother is like that but when you’re in that space you do stupid things, don’t you think? Your parents have done a terrible job with all of you kids, you are all damaged in your own way. And Malik saw everyone’s pain because he was the youngest and the most ignored. You was the chosen one, the one that stayed in Spain, the one that got your dad’ attention, your mother seems to dote on you the most even though Malik was there with her as a mother was she really a mother” I said to Maurice in a whisper “just listen to me, he did what he did and it was wrong, but the real Malik. The one before the drugs what was he like Maurice?” I asked, “tell me that, what was he like?” moving my hands away from his arms “I want to be selfish; I am sick of people thinking they can do what they like. You know? It’s about me now. Me, you and Reign. That is it” I sighed out “then why did you smile at the picture of you and your brother when I showed you when he was clinging onto you, tell me? I am not being soft I just think he needs help, and he wants you to care. And I feel he always did want you to care, he couldn’t have helped you, who listens to him?” Maurice huffed out “Maurice, pootie listen to me. You have two terrible parents, be a big brother to him and help him. And if he comes out of it being a dickhead, then that was just him, but you tried. Why is your dad asking your permission anyways?” I am confused with that “because my dad is transitioning the business to me, the accounts have come to me. He wants to take money from the account to put him in rehab, he doesn’t want to use his own retirement fund” nodding my head “right, where is Malik’ money?” now I am confused “he lives off my dad, he has no money. I always did, Nalah does” that is terrible “if that ever happens to any of my kids, one gets one and the other gets nothing, I will murder you. Reign and our future kids get equal” shaking my head “now please, find your heart and do it” Marquis is fucking trash.

Family crisis I wish I was not involved with, but I guess I ain’t got no choice but to be involved, I will end up being a Davenport, I just think Maurice needs to play this wisely. I feel like this will work in his favour in regard to his brother, his dad is so disgusting. He didn’t want to use his own money to help his own child “Maurice, wait. You know when your dad helped you, was this off his own back, like with his own cash?” Maurice nodded his head “he dragged me there, he literally dragged me there and dropped me off there” I feel disgusted with him, he wants to see my daughter. He will do anything for her but his own child, I mean I shouldn’t be shocked. He has a child in Europe, he had Maurice calling his Spanish bitch Mami, he had several wives. Oh this man has been around, but yet he’s still being trash “let’s go in, just please don’t do what I don’t want you to do, please” walking behind Maurice to go back into the room, Maurice pushed open the door “Robyn does have a lot to say son, doesn’t she. Good you can control him and his big mouth” Marquis said laughing “you need to be controlled son” closing the door behind me “what do you want me to do? I am speaking to Malik, not you dad” Maurice said, Marquis was about to speak “hey, dumbass. I am speaking to you, what do you want from me? You had Noami? I mean you was pretty happy were you not” he is so out of it, like Malik is just a blank canvas staring “Malik” I said, Maurice doesn’t know how to speak “Maurice wants to know what he can do to help you” Maurice is turned around looking at me, he is not the slightest bit happy “he can say it” Malik said, Maurice sighed out “I am not playing stupid games, just fuck off out of my home. You all can go” glaring at him as he walked around me to leave me here “seriously?” Maurice opened the door “well I heard; I am here. Thank you Terry” Nalah has now arrived, just nice.

Nalah looked at Malik “seriously, look at you. What is wrong with you? Oh Malik” she made her way over to him, my mom just stared at me and I just rolled my eyes as Maurice closed the door “I saw that” he said as he walked over to me “you was about to run, you can’t run. Why do you run from situations huh?” Maurice stood in front of me “because he deserves it” Maurice mumbled “then blame me when it doesn’t work, at the end of the day nobody shows him love, what is wrong with you. Look at Nalah, just look” I pointed, Maurice looked behind him to see Nalah fussing over him “then why don’t Nalah help him huh? Come on big sister!” Maurice spat “why on earth is this my issue?” here he goes “because Maurice, you’re taking funds off people. You are taking everyone’s money to make them work, how can he have money if you won’t give anything to anyone unless they work, huh? I did tell you that this was not logical” Marquis is ever so calm about shit, he knows that it would annoy Maurice “maybe if you gave Malik money in the first place, maybe if you loved him enough then he would have something, you think that too?” Maurice spat getting in Marquis’ face “Joy wanted another child, she got it. This is not my issue, what are you going to do about it?” I wish he never called me to be honest “y’all are so wrong! Shut up! First of all, dad, he is sat right there. He was wanted, and second of all your ex-wife fucked over our little brother to get to you. You and I both know she didn’t want him, she fed him drugs, and then got him like this and you get him kicked out and arrested!? I am sick of you and dad; mom just stop crying. I can’t be bothered to hear it, take your head out of your ass. This is not about putting face anymore, fuck the money. That is the little brother that clung onto you when you came back from Spain, even then you was an asshole to him. It was him counting the days when dad said you was coming back and then when you came back for good you didn’t care then, just slightly when you moved to New York. He was begging to drive everyone else’s car because dad didn’t get him his first car. It was me that asked dad to get the car for me and I gave it him, fuck you both. My god” I hope Maurice feels awful “he betrayed me too, he released shit about me, my daughter” Maurice said “not as much he’s been betrayed his whole life” I feel choked up now.

Nalah has really snapped on them, they deserve it and I don’t want Maurice staring at me like I will help him when I told him what to do “I don’t need anything, I will help him myself” Nalah said “I will give you money to help with fees, I know rehab is not cheap” I spoke up, I will take the money out of my own account “no I will” Maurice added quickly, Malik sobbed out crying “you always been nice to me, I remember” Maurice got in my eye-view “what now, I told you. I said it to you, if you listened to me. What did I say to you” I said in a whisper “I will pay, it’s my brother” Maurice retorted “and that is my brother in law, where was your heart before? You needed Nalah to say that, for me to step up? Is that it” I am not trying to have an argument when his parents are just staring at us “I am hurt by him, he fucked me over too. Did he not?” nodding my head “and so was I in this, but we all saw he was taken advantage of, we knew it. I said for you to be a brother to him” Marquis is staring at us both, I just caught him watching “then let me deal with it?” Maurice is desperate to change it now “so you can belittle him, like you just did with your dad. I said for you to take him, but you didn’t” looking at Nalah helping Malik “I am taking him” she said “then make it right” I said to Maurice, I want him to fix it “Malik, look. I will pay for it, I’ll do it. I can get you the best help” Nalah seems to be very angry with Maurice “here comes Maurice speaking with his money, oh fuck you. Come on Malik, Robyn I will be in touch. And do not come near me, and fuck your fancy party. Still you talk out of your ass” I knew Nalah was not happy, Maurice let out a deep sigh as they both left the room, I wish he listened to me.

#Chrianna #Chrianna FF #Fanfic #Fanfiction

9 notes · View notes

they-are-not-just-stories · 5 years

Text

P.S. I’ve Always Loved You - Chapter 1

A/N: Disclaimer: I am not a licensed doctor and any and all medical terminology and mentions below should not be used for medical advice. Guys, I’m only a young, aspiring med student so don’t quote me on anything I write in here about it! Thanks, love you!

Recommended Playlist: P.S. I’ve Always Loved You Playlist

Pairing: Tom Hardy x OFC, OFC x Minor Characters

Warnings: Foreshadow because I am a jerk

Word Count: ~3k

You wake up to the incessant buzzing of your alarm. You pry one open to check the time and see that the clock read 5:30 a.m. You hated mornings because it took your forever to actually become a functioning human being, but being a doctor for a few years made it more bearable as you always looked forward to the work.

You pull the covers off your body, swinging your legs over the edge you make your way to the bathroom. You do the usual routine of showering, brushing your teeth and touching up the dark circles under your eyes. You make weird faces at yourself in the mirror and decided it was good enough. You enter the kitchen to make a cup of coffee for now and one for the road, breathing in the aroma of freshly roasted coffee. When you were still in your residency, you used to go get coffee with Tom in the morning because he was filming locally and had to be up early too. So you both made it a habit to have coffee together, but that ended once you finished your residency and he went off to find other films.

You finish up your breakfast, grabbing your bag, keys and coffee. The car ride to the hospital, you liked to run through all your cases and what you would be doing today and plan for the work and studying you would do afterwards. A good habit you needed to make while in school because you probably wouldn’t have been as successful without it. You just wished some of that would have rubbed off on Tom. Sure he was organized in his own way, but as kids, you would sometimes have dinner at his house and hear his mum get after him for his dirty room and always missing school assignments because he didn’t keep them organized.

He was a lot better with that now. He needed to be now that he was getting noticed more, he needed to know the in’s and out’s of each part he was going for. But every now and then you teased him about being messy and it always brought you both smiles.

----

You arrive at the hospital, greeting the familiar staff. Entering your office, you go over all the notes you had made from the previous day to discuss with patients. You didn’t have any surgeries today, so that freed up more of your time. Although you would probably use it to study. But you loved it, the job, the learning. You loved your job and it showed. Your patients would recommend others to you when deciding a risky surgical procedure, which was extremely rewarding for the work you always put into it.

7:00 a.m. You walk into the room to see a younger patient and an older woman sitting with her. The girl seemed nervous once she saw you walk in. Her leg bouncing vigorously against the the padded exam bed.

“Hello, I’m Dr. Monreau. And you must be Katie?” You smile kindly at her, seemingly to put her more at ease. She nods at your question. You turn to the older woman next to her. “You must be mom?”

“Yes, it’s good to meet your Dr. Monreau. Katie isn’t feeling so great so we came to see you!” She shook your hand and turned to rub her hands reassuringly on Katie’s arm.

“Ok! So it says here you are feeling some pain in your shoulder and now it’s in your elbow?” You flip through her charts to see what previous check ups and tests were done.

“Yes. She had fallen down at school last week from the ice and landed on her shoulder. She said she heard a crack and there was a lot of pain in her shoulder. We had iced it for a few days and just stretched it, but now she says there’s pain in her elbow.” The woman spoke.

“Do you do any sports Katie? Anything you would need you arm for?” She looks down at her hands and shakes her head.

“Ok, let’s take a look.” You put on a pair of gloves and reached to roll up her sleeve. Katie pulled away from you, her eyes afraid. “I won’t you hurt Ok? I just need to look for any swelling or discoloration.” She hesitantly let you look at her shoulder. You gently press in different areas to get a reaction from her. You take note of the slight swelling near her rotator cuff, assuming her bursae were inflamed.

You nod and roll over to pull out a chart of a shoulder to explain to them what was happening. “Ok, so this is where she’s feeling most of the pain.” You point to where the rotator cuff in the shoulder was positioned and explained the muscles and tissue around it. “I’m strongly guessing that when she landed, the crack she heard was possibly a tendon tearing, or her shoulder popping out of place. Now if she was hearing a grinding noise still then I would say that it was dislocated. Now the swelling here,” You wave a finger over her discolored shoulder. “...can be what I believe is three possibilities. Bursitis which if we look here.” You point to the chart again. “These are fluid filled sacs that help cushion the bone and tissue, they are called the bursa. There can be pressure on it causing the pain and inflammation. Second guess it tendinitis, where the tendon is over used and inflamed from the fall. Or there’s impingement which is where her shoulder blade is putting too much pressure on the surrounding tissue and basically squeezing the muscles where she can’t move and this eventually leads to the previous two.”

Her mother nods and takes in all the information you presented her. “Are they anything serious.” She sat forward in her chair, lips pursed in worry.

You pull the gloves of your hands and toss them in the trash, writing down your notes on her charts. “They aren’t when they are taken care of immediately. So I’m gonna order some X-rays to check to see of there are any fractures, any broken piece can also be causing pain. But if it’s what I think it is, I would only recommend taking it easy at home and school, I can you prescribe some medicine for the pain and bring down the swelling. I’d like to avoid surgery if possible, but I want that X-ray first before we make decisions.” You look over to her mom again, she relaxed a little hearing it wasn’t as bad as she thought.

“Do you-do you like being a doctor?” Katie spoke quietly. Surprising you a little. You smiled at her. You loved it when patience asked you questions about your career, you loved hearing young and interested minds.

“I love being a doctor Katie! Are you thinking of being one?” You crossed your arms, giving her your full attention. Her mom held her hand, looking proud at her.

“I want to do what you do.” She weakly smiled.

“Oh well I’m flattered! There is always a need for an Orthopedic Surgeon! Do you have any questions while we wait for your X-ray?” She pulled her head up to look at you. A shy smile thrown your way that gave you goosebumps.

“Do you see a lot of people?” You noticed she was nervous again as she fiddled with her jeans. You were like that once. A nervous wreck, never knowing what to say or do. You didn’t want to do anything wrong because you had to do everything right. This job definitely helped change that. Although there wasn’t much room for error it helped you become more confident in your knowledge.

“Well, in a day, I can see up to twenty or more people. Some days I will have to go into surgeries to make people feel better. It can be pretty crazy, but I don’t let that stop me and neither should you. If you are looking to shadow me to see what my day is like, give me a call I’d be happy to try to get you in somewhere!” You laughed at her jolting up at the offer. Yup. Just like you. You were shy, but medicine was certainly your calling.

A soft knock at the door drew your attention, a nurse came in to get Katie to her X-ray. She hands you a clipboard to sign the form on it. You stand up to talk with her mom about some possible rehab options, medications and to answer her questions.

You squat down to look to Katie, her nerves showing again in her face. “Hey, don’t worry kiddo. They are going to have you lay on a table and take these really cool pictures of your shoulder. You’ll get to see what it looks like on the inside and then when they’re done we can go get ice cream, how’s that sound?” She shook her head furiously at your invite, now more willing to follow the nurse to radiology. Her mom mouthed a thanks to you, following after Katie. You smile at her and head towards the front desk.

“Hey, Val. Can you page me when Katie gets back from radiology? I promised her ice cream.” You smile at the woman, looking back at Katie talking the nurses ear off already.

“You certainly are the favorite aren’t you Lizzy?”

“That’s only your bias opinion.” You chuckle.

“Not just mine honey! I hear things around the office and you are definitely the main topic.” She winked at you, going back to the work on her computer.

You were new to this office, having been somewhat fresh out of residency. You made friends with your coworkers fairly quickly, but you didn’t think that everyone would be talking about you.

You make your way to the cafeteria to grab some coffee. Pouring yourself a cup, you accidentally spill some of the hot liquid on your hand, causing you to drop the pot.

“Dammit!” You grasp your hand, trying to soothe the pain.

“Are you alright? Here let me clean this up.” It was Dr. Walker. Ever since you had started working at this office, you have had a crush on him. He had a beautiful smile, he was funny. Handsome as ever, and incredibly smart and kind.

“Oh! Don’t fuss over me! I’m Ok. Thank you Dr. Walker.” You knelt down to clean up the rest of the black liquid.

“James.” He looked up at you and smiled lightly. “Can I take a look?”

“What?”

He laughed at your confused look. “Your hand. Just want to make sure you have no burns. May I?”

You reluctantly let him observe it. It still stung a little, but didn’t look as bad as it felt. You studied him as he checked you injuries. He had a little crease between his eyebrows, his lips pursed in a thin line. He was gentle with you.

“Looks Ok to me! Just put a cold, damp towel over it to help soothe the pain.” He smiled again.

“Thank you Dr. Wa- uhh James. Thank you.”

“It was my pleasure Dr. --”

“Dr. Monreau!” Katie ran up to you, all smiles. “Can we get ice cream now?! Hi, Dr. Walker!”

You laughed at her sudden change in behavior. She was silly and laughing, and completely open to talking to anyone.

“Yeah sure thing kiddo! Wait for me over there and we’ll get some from the stand outside Ok?” She nodded excitedly, dragging her mom outside to the stand trying to figure out what she wanted. You turned to James again. “You know Katie?”

“Yeah, I work in radiology and she came in today to get X-rays. Which I assume it was you who ordered them?” You quirked an eyebrow.

“Interesting coincidence.”

“Indeed. Maybe we can let it happen again, except for the coffee on the floor part? Perhaps in a cup and with your company?” You smiled at him, feeling like a shy little girl with a school crush around his request.

“I’d love to.” He smiled and nodded his head, making his way towards Katie. You felt all giddy. Did the hot doctor just ask you out for coffee? After you made a fool of yourself?

“Lizzy!” You hear the familiar voice. Always could grab the attention of a crowd. He walked up to you, arms open.

“Hey Tommy! What are you doin’ here?” You gave him a quick hug.

“Just wanted to visit you at work, how are you doin’ love?”

“Pretty great actually! See that doctor over there?” You pointed in James’ direction. He nodded at your question. “He asked me out!” You grinned brightly.

You look back at Tom when he was silent. You scrunched your face when you realized he wasn’t as excited as you. You tilted your head at him.

“I don’t think you should go out with him.”

“What? Why?” You were starting to get angry.

“He’s a doctor. Those kind of relationships are not good. I don’t want him to hurt you Lizzy. You’re like my little sister.”

It was like a gut punch when he referred to you as his little sister. But who was he to dictate who you can spend time with? He was with Mia for god sakes!

“I’ll have you know he is a complete gentleman. You have no right to tell me who I can and cannot be with.” You stormed past him. You couldn’t hear anymore of this. It hurt a little knowing this is what he thought of you. Then to have the courage to tell you, you can’t go on a date with someone who was actually giving you attention.

You walk over to where Katie and James were. Joining them in conversation, easily hitting it off with James again. Tom watched you from a distance. He cared about you and he didn’t know this guy. You were a grown up and could make your own choices, but he just felt he still needed to protect you with everything you’ve been through.

You and James walk back to the office together, talking about medical stuff and things you both liked. He made you easily laugh, and his smile was absolutely perfect.

“How have I not talked with you before Dr. Monreau? You are absolutely amazing!” You blushed at his compliments.

“Just call me Lizzy. But I guess we are both pretty busy, but they say the best things come to those who wait.” He tried to suppress a smile from your comment.

“Well in that case, I am a very patient man.” He winked at you and said his goodbyes, returning to his department.

“Oooh honey! You got yourself a good one!” You hear Val cheering for you in the next room.

“He is really something isn’t he?”

“I can’t help but live these moments through you.” You both laughed at this, knowing that the entire department probably knew about you and James before anything has happened. Damn Val and her gossiping.

“Oh, someone left this for you too.” She waggled her eyebrows at you, suggesting it came from a particularly charming man.

She hands you a tiny little note wrapped in a red ribbon. You open it to see beautiful penmanship and a note simply stating:

How did I get so lucky to find someone like you?

Permanent Taglist: @drakesfiance @j-j-ehlby-writes

If you would like to be added to this series taglist or my permanent, send an ask or comment!

#Tom Hardy #tom hardy fanfic #Edward thomas hardy #thomas hardy imagine #tom hardy x ofc #p.s. ive always loved you series #they-are-not-just-stories #tom hardy series #gif credit to owner

29 notes · View notes

muggle-zoology · 5 years

Note

Hey do you have any advice for how I can work in animal conservation or like zoology work. I’m close to graduating college with a bachelors degree in psychology. Sadly when I started I was to afraid to go for what I really wanted, which was zoology. And now part of me feels like it’s too late to do anything but I just really want to work with animals or wildlife in some way. I would do more schooling if I had too. But I was just wondering if you had any advice on what I could do.

Hey Anon!

I would like to preface this by saying that I don’t work in animal conservation or zoology myself currently, I’m working through my Honours and have a couple of volunteer positions.

But I hope I can give you some advice anyway!

Depending on where you are in the world some of this might not be as useful, but all I’ve got to draw on is my experience here in Australia.

I’m going to be honest, conservation and zoology unfortunately are fairly underfunded fields and there is a high chance that you will have to do a lot of volunteering to get anywhere. Jobs can be hard to come by depending on what you want to do and how far you are willing to move.

But don’t let that discourage you, even if a full-time career in this field is not what you are after or get, there are still many ways to get involved and help.

It’s definitely not too late! Depending on the type of work you want to get into, you may need to do extra schooling (eg. research), but if it’s a more practical hands on thing it’s more useful to have experience and maybe a certificate. And in general, experience is way more useful than having a bachelor (unless the job specifies you have to have one). It’s one thing to have the theory, another to be actually able to do something with it.

I don’t know how things work where you are, but it may be possible for you to get to the next level (masters possibly?) and switch to conservation now that you have a bachelor in science, and you may just need to do a couple of bridging units to bring you up to speed. The best way to see if this is possible to talk to someone at your college.

A great way to get some hands on experience is to see if there is a wildlife rehab center near where you live. Those kinds of places are almost always looking for volunteers and are generally happy if you’re willing to spend a couple of hours a week there. They give great hands on experience and learning opportunities that you can put on your resume.

A museum may also be a good place to go. Despite the general opinion, museums are by and large research institutions that have seasoned academics working on numerous projects which range from taxonomy to genetics and more things than I will ever be able to understand (and that’s only in Zoology). One person I met at the Australian Museum in Sydney ended up traveling over south-east Asia and Africa helping identify illegal ivory that had been seized. Others identify new species which changes the conservation status and how they are managed. Depending on where you live, the number of volunteer positions may be different, but unless they really do have more than they can handle, I doubt they’d turn you away. Museum staff also tend to know who’s who in conservation circles and may be able to point you in the right direction.

Things like animal parks and zoos will be more difficult since more people will want to be involved. For example, the Perth Zoo has a waiting list for volunteers wanting to become Docents (the guides), and you have to have been a Docent for about 4 years before you are allowed to volunteer with the animals directly. They also only recruit volunteers once a year. But it’s still worth a shot!

Once you have some experience you may be able to do a certificate which you can use as further proof of experience.

Check the Zoology department at your college, research students are sometimes looking for volunteers. You could help in the field with data collection, or simply helping them put their data into a database. Both of which are good things to have a reference for.

Any kind of field-based volunteering will be harder to manage, especially since they generally require a minimum one week commitment. They are incredibly useful, but you will often have to pay for your own travel costs and any equipment, and depending on what you are handling, perhaps even a rabbies shot (which in Australia cost $300). A couple of friends of mine have done a year-long volunteering trip to the Kalahari where they monitored meerkats. It looked amazing, but they had to pay for everything except food and accommodation. Which if you’re like me and don’t have about $3000 dollars to use and need to worry about where you were going to live when you got back, isn’t an ideal situation.

PhD students tend to have funding from their projects that they will be able to foot a fair portion of the bill. And most government institutions will at least give a weekly allowance to help pay for food and fuel, and will generally have a place nearby that you can live in if you are travelling to get there. You can learn about these simply by emailing their inquiries email and asking if there are any positions available or if they can put you on their volunteer mailing list so you hear about them quickly.

And never forget out useful social media can be! There are entire Facebook groups/pages that dedicate themselves to posting volunteer and job opportunities. Follow local conservation groups and government agencies on Facebook, they will often post something. Follow them on LinkedIn, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, wherever they post.https://www.facebook.com/WildlifeJobSearch/

And there are also websites dedicated to this:https://www.environmentjobs.com/ https://www.conservation-careers.com/http://www.ecojobs.com/index.php

I know it can be daunting, and for a long time I doubted whether I had made the right decision in picking Zoology as my major. But there are a lot of ways to get your foot in the door, no matter on how involved you end up deciding to become.

I hope this has helped!

#anon #anon asks #Mel answers #zoology #animal #conservation #volunteering #wildlife #advice #Anonymous

20 notes · View notes

carroll32friedman-blog · 5 years

Text

Investing in a home is probably the most significant investments you'll make in your lifetime, too as the most exciting. Nonetheless, that excitement can quickly use sorrow when you end up with a property that seemed to be a take but was really a rip-off of. The information in this article will provide you with a wealth of valuable details to assist you to buy a house that you'll be very pleased to call house.

When you are wanting to buy a new house, it really is important to locate a retailer who seems to be determined to perform the deal. Sort through on-line entries to find properties which have been outlined for a while or have fallen their price just recently. If your owner is determined, it indicates that they are more inclined to lessen the cost of the property in order to meet your financial budget. Don't enable the decor or small cosmetic problems stop you from purchasing what might otherwise be your aspiration residence. Simple renovations like painting, shifting (or simply cleaning up)flooring, or upgrading fixtures and tiling, could turn one thing you see ugly, into an issue that is like it was actually a custom made home just for you. Exercise caution when selecting a property which is around the simple transaction marketplace. There are plenty of events that are involved in this kind of purchase which make it easier for something to visit wrong before you obtain the deed to the home. Be prepared to get rid of the property which you consider you might be winning at public sale. When selecting real-estate be aware that a 20 year-old property is potentially the most severe because so many factors tend not to stay longer than that. You should check out to make sure the furnace, roof top, and air conditioner happen to be replaced or know that you are exchanging them in the near future out of your bank account. Make relocating plans prior to it is time and energy to move into your brand-new house. Having a shifting truck timetabled and cases purchased beforehand will save you a great deal of tension when relocating time is available close to. Pack the boxes little by little and label them plainly to help you shift them within their new rooms very easily. 1 essential hint in terms of real estate, is to comply with your gut feeling after you have done all of your research and backdrop function. This is very important, due to the fact should you ever want to buy a property, at some time you must commence placing delivers and creating decisions. So long as you have completely well prepared on your own for purchasing a residence, this will make it vital that you depend upon your intuition. When gonna wide open houses, it really is required to bring a seasoned and knowledgeable rehab professional. The rehab licensed contractor should be able to help you accurately calculate the cost of repair for properties. Also, Jade scape might be able to spot defects that you may have missed throughout a personal examination. Similar to you might with getting a automobile, check out distinct functions of the home during your excursion. Manage the water in the sink to see how long it takes to get boiling water. Stay in a single room and talk to one another from the wall structure to discover how well insulated it is. These may be significant elements within a properties desirability. When purchasing a lease house, be certain to look into the neighborhood lease charges first. Possessing a solid idea of how much other attributes in the community are leasing for can assist you to find out your financial budget. You'll have a far better notion of what things to provide about the home and what you can budget for updates at the same time. Make certain you job interview multiple real estate broker prior to deciding to retain the services of any individual to assist you to purchase or offer a home. Look for somebody who is acquainted with the region and it is an expert at the same time. Make sure to opt for someone your identiity more comfortable with while you get around this tough procedure. Do not try to purchase a home except if you work on a spot that gives work protection. A lot of people have the error of purchasing a residence if they have a job that may be not very secure then they could not have the month-to-month home loan payments after they become unemployed. Through taking something at all out of the suggestions in this post, you ought to realize that it's effortless to obtain a good deal, provided that you method the industry by using a degree head and proper amount of information. Perhaps not each and every hint in this article will likely be beneficial to you, nevertheless, you can gather an overall concept about how to make out like a bandit. Now, all that's left is to apply the advice.

1 note · View note

littlenemoonhbo · 3 years

Text

Hey mom. I went to church and prayed over the matter of the crazy person and Jesus put it on my heart that its best to talk to him since he stole a picture of my birth certificate and the prayer gave me the instinct to check on it so he doesn't steal my apartment. The preacher at the West Park Church (my preacher I booked art/film sessions for 2011-2012 occupy wallstreet before my roommate and fellow occupier died of crack in 2013 (after teddy died they sold me room and then preacher sent me to the shelter over homelessness)lost the room/got forwarded to the shelter after working with the preacher for living and ballerina dance bookings + Christian attendance housing via Occupy Wallstreet. Living at the church for 3 years the preacher robert breuscheur of the west park presyptarian church has become a good friend and source of legal advice about the shelter which I frequently think of sueing (for inhuman conditions I have documented) Im very much afraid of this guy who keeps making paper copies of my information I already got and telling staff he's going to take my a (Preacher robert l breuscheur of the west park Presbyterian church who forwarded me to this shelter after my roommate died of crack in 2013 and his assistant from Columbia University Danielle gave me paperwork validating my work so I didn't have to go homeless. who I worked for under occupy film I visited for help on the stimulus fraud) said this crazy guy at the shelter who copied my info could/wants to file me as an dependent or try and says he's going to pretend to be you filing me as a dependent? The whole thing has become really insulting, he hugs me says were best friends, then says he's gonna committee suicide and then says I don't deserve a mom has gonna spit on her give her Corina Virus tell her to send me to rehab and steal her stimulus calms down offers me medication to help with my narcolepsy and then gets in fights with people. I don't want the guy to get staff to take away my apartment

by bothering them so I learned to talk to no one the guy says he's gonna kill himself daily but the preacher said to check up on him because he has my info. He keeps questioning my sleep labs and gets his medication with a fake name, says he sympathizes with my narcolepsy gives out free weak medications and then screams rehab, I learned not to talk to him, the preacher says he is trying to steal my picture to say he has narcolepsy and went to sleep labs to steal my apartment and telling them to send me to rehab so I can get Corona Virus not him, I walk away after saying hi to be nice.

I tried to kill him with kindness but realize he's schitzophrenic. Its really insulting you that makes me cringe, I told him I was going to Connecticut to avoid him and he keeps bringing it up and drooling on me (This person pretends to have ADD but has schitzophrenic ) (since I told the pasteurize of his insane behavior-fighting any homeless person that came near me "claiming were brothers one second offering me medication to help with my narcolepsy to then START screaming and tell me I don't have narcolepsy and didn't deserve an apartment should die of COVID and need rehab (after being friendly asking about how my treatments are coming along and my student loan President biden school work-he's unstable keeps claiming unto me!

[YOUR]"mother filed me as a dependent and she has my business loan money." As on her believes he's going to steal your social security/by telling YOU! MY! MOTHER! im dead and get my apartment and stimulus by saying he's stimulus shelter help...he keeps saying this daily! Never so insulted! Staff no care! Very afraid preacher Robert Bruecheur at West Park Church says document it.

AND he keeps telling me im LITERALLYthe virus I don't deserve a mother or to go to SCHOOL (when I was praying he told me im satanic and killed her! I documented this for lawyers.)

I avoid staff so I dont get sent away get apartment. Looking into another shelter called Brightpoint Health the church suggested after my most recent visit.

He claims he needed money more looked into credit freeze/social security freeze incase he is using my number. Is literally saying he made my bushwick brooklyn apartment and attended my school of visual arts education. He mimics what I say I dont even think he told the shelter his teal name. said a lot of weird things like he was going to take my apartment/disability for My state apartment "and is giving me a corporate credit card just needs to document me as an emplyee". He jeeps saying really insulting things like he's going to tell my mother to give him my money and "he knows she owes money still on her house". He bought my novel on Amazon.com and is pretending to be me / trying to steal my university of hartford transcript which they wont give him (I looked up credit activity and put a freeze on it. Getting IRS on this! Just aboiding him and following preachers advice.)

He claims hes going to tell "my mother im crazy and expose me to my doctors that I have hypersomnia not narcolepsy and get my mother to give him my stimulus? Very threatening and odd person and gets in fights all the time screams at me after getting in a fight in the street he gonna kill himself if I dont listen to him. I [He doesn't know what this is but appears to believe he can steal my info and apartment placement by claiming im ill undeserving and never went to the school of visual arts or sleep labratories (since he got very jealous! Of my apartment interview! I told him I went to my mothers and he just kept claiming "SHE FILED YOU AS A DEPENDENT: TOOK YOIR STIMULIS YOU NEED REHAB (after giving me my OWN medication he gets under a false name! Says he gonna take my apartment placement and SNAP identification: ALL BECAUSE HE SAW MY PAPER APPLICATION TO FILM SCHOOL+ AND APARTMENT! (Which the state asks for diagnose for President Biden/Shelter to pay for your rent/electric.

Most insane person ever claims he gonna tell the government/STIMULIS and social security people IM DIEING OF COVID! Even said I don't deserve a mom he gonna call her and tell her im dieing of COVID and steal stimulus from me by screaming at my moms im not narcoleptic im a drug addict (so he can steal my apartment! This after seeing my sleep lab photos and doctor papers on getting into new medication! He offers me MY OWN MEDICATION as a friend one minute sees I have narcolepsy and cares about my film school Joe Biden application (and then another second claims I am rehab addict and dont have narcolepsy because he saw my papers saw hypersomnia tells me he worships the devil is going to kill himself, throws chairs to threaten me or scare me (after saying im his only friend he has no family been crying and begs me to talk to him kr he'll kill himself!) and claims he'll have staff send me to rehab (so he can have my apartment) AND CALL MY MOM TO HAVE HER ADD HIm AS A DEPEDNDENT (take my stimulus and demand she give him "the business credit sign off he deserves, because he is going to tell my mother im dead and get her to give him my stimulus money?" Also claims he will tell my mother im dead to switch my social security application in his name (by showing he has my picture over a video and saying I died from the virus? I documeted this encase I have to send this to court/IRS to get the stimulus back. Pure schitzophrenic. I avoid rhis person most days.

HE GAVE ME A BIRTHDAY PRESENT told me im his only friend and then said he was gonna kill himself if I dont talk to him and start a business. Breaks down after veibg friendly and demand I die of corona virus go to rehab to staff and then they give him my apartment (but he's lieing about his real name and going to the school of visual arts which is on my application for the apartment they interviewed me for! The preacher and staff said to ignore him so I guess he cant oretend to be me and say im dead to steal my apartment and call my mom and tell her I killed his wife im satanic )which he claimed when I prayed to Joel olstein….then went back to normal. I am working with the pasteurize from the church on finding other Section-8 housing but he said to stick it through and avoid him,just pray for him, document his words on saying "he's going to call my mom tell her im dead orin rehab to steal my stimulus" and kt listen to his claimms im satanic. Im pretty afraid offended by this guy but will just document for lawyers in case he stole my stimulus. Hopefully I dot have to call the cops. He got in another fight yesterday and said he was gonna kill himself. But tge staff said hopefully I hear back soon. Pray for me. Baby angels love you mom just keeping you updated but I think I have it under control and have a new doctor appointment scheduled, since he stole the phone number and then practice probably will not wish to continue after being heckled. Third time I lost a narcolepsy/ADD sleep lab doctor to tjis shelter. Hope to move soon. Love you mom have a good day at work. Talk soon.

1 note · View note

rehabhc · 4 years

Text

How To Tackle The Alcohol Temptation After Rehab

Alcohol addiction may be something you wish you never had, especially when you see visible damages it does. However, you are already on your first step towards recovery, when you realize you are falling prey to this. There are several ways to fight Alcohol detox London based, and one way is by seeking expert advice from Rehab Healthcare.

What Happens on Identifying Problem Drinking?

The second step could be to consult your friends or family. In short, people who will go to any lengths to see you get over your habits. Then after, you may call the counsellors at Rehab Healthcare, the premier Alcohol Addiction Clinic London based. They will then guide you through the residential detox process. It will be an orientation program where they will discuss the ways you may start the journey to detox yourself. The first step of the assessment will be there. After that, they will help you pick the rehab. In many cases, the family will be assessing and deciding this rehab as per their budget constraints. Moreover, after regular assessments, the doctors will find you sober and clean and allow you to go home. Now begins the big challenge of aftercare.

What Makes Aftercare an Essential Part of Recovery?

By aftercare, we mean the life outside in the open, where the temptations to go back to alcoholic ways is high. The first 3 months would be the most challenging phase. Remember, once you leave the Alcohol Addiction treatment in the UK in a rehab centre, your abstinence goes through the ultimate test.

In a rehab, you hardly have anyone asking you for a night out party, or bring in a crate of beer for a movie night. This is, therefore, easier than the aftercare time. Now you are back home, consider taking this specialized care for making the aftercare period more meaningful and let you remain sober.

How to Handle the Challenge of Temptations

It is going to be a daily struggle, mind you, but it is undoubtedly better than going back to the alcoholic ways. Relapse is common when you are once again getting such triggers urging you to go for the alcohol or substance addiction. So, let us list on ways to make you stay clean and for good too.

Know Your Support: If you could be the people who care for you, the valuable people. Understand the pain they went through to get back on your sober ways. Many support groups are available online or locally too. You may even contact the Alcohol Addiction Clinic London based on where you got the rehab services to give you such a contact. These are all people who would be all in this together, fighting the lure of the addiction.

Use CBT to Recognize Red Flags: Start by identifying the red flags that are strong enough around you. It will help you know the best ways to stay away from them.

Stay away from people who force you to drink

Stay away from triggering situations

Stay away from negative feelings, anger

Avoid conflict with anyone near you

Stay away from bars in parties

Continue with Discipline: The idle mind is indeed the devil’s workshop. When you were in rehab, you would have got a specific form or discipline to lead your life. Now the aftercare period also follows the same lifestyle. Be busy with your life, and don’t stop exercising and healthy diets. It should be a way of life, and it would also ensure you never swerve out to old ways again or have time for going back to alcohol.

Use CBT to Stay Away from Temptation: Now, you have understood the triggers that push you to temptation, find out ways to stay away from it. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) will be essential to remain on watch and alert you when you are too close to the urge.

De-Clutter Your Life from Stashes: In times of alcoholism, you may have hidden the bottles or have cans of beer in the refrigerator 365 days a year. Now that you are trying to get over it, remove all the old traces of drinks from your home. Remove all the bottles from wherever you usually hide it. It would help if you did it yourself and without the least hesitation.

Get Help When You Fail: If you feel you are slipping, don’t hesitate to seek help again. There is no hard and fast rule that you should not go for rehab again. We all have our strengths and battles we face. Some have more substantial will power and some with less. But remember, the aftercare support teams will always be there to answer you whenever you need it.

The way to recovery is not simple, and it requires more commitment than ever to remain sober all life.

#Alcohol Addiction

0 notes

gotmudonyou · 5 years

Text

OCR World Championships 2019 3K Report

Last year’s OCR World Championships saw some of the most glorious weather you could hope to see in October. Could we be that lucky 2 years in a row??!! In a word...No. It was colder, wetter and muddier than last year and those elements combined to make this a very different race.

With the injury plagued season I had last year I had worked hard on my pre-hab and very slowly increased my mileage across the year. Following the 2018 World Championships I’d been experiencing shoulder pain which limited the amount of hanging work I could do. In fact it hampered many elements of my training and was finding it hard to bench press or bicep curl without pain. This turned out to be a mixture of biceps tendinitis and rotator cuff instability. It took roughly 4 months of physio and rehab to sort this. Everything was going great until knee pain reared its ugly head again around July. With no chance to take time out to properly sort the issue I agreed with my physio that damage limitation was the key, I needed to go into the event with as little knee pain as possible. This meant very reduced running mileage which I made up for in functional obstacle training over longer periods and walk/run/bike sessions to get ‘time on feet’.

The 3K was a short but obstacle heavy course. It was certainly more technical than last year’s 3k. Before my race I managed to watch some of my wife Jo’s race. Seeing many competitors struggling with some of the obstacles in the rain was worrying me but I needed to focus. I’d been out on a walk of the course with Team UK the day before so I knew my race plan and how I was going to attack each obstacle.

With the 3k each age group are set off in waves of around 10 competitors to ensure the course doesn't get any queues. Having agreed to film the pro waves for the official live stream a short time after my finish I wanted to be near the front. I stood in the start pen next to my good friend Stuart ‘El Capitan’ Neail who had cleared the final obstacle at the same time as me the year before.

This year there was little pre-amble from Spartan Phil and we were off. The first few obstacles were designed to drain you and spread the field. A set of ditches into a tyre pit and then Monty’s Hurdles. These are a set of wooden hurdles around chest height that you have to go over and ensure your feet touch the ground in between each hurdle. There are around 10 of them and they take it out of you!

Next up was the first technical obstacle, the first Force 5 Rig .

Force 5 Rig 1

This was a fairly simple obstacle with some pivoting holds and rings to swing across but a nice obstacle to warm up on. After another Nuclear Races obstacle ‘La Gaffe’ it was a little run up through the woods to meet the first proper rig -The Nuclear Nitro Rig. This was a a rig of various holds and ropes. It wasn't particularly difficult or grip sapping but it was fiddly and I’m not sure there was a graceful way of completing it. I got it done going for safety rather than speed.

undefined

youtube

Nuclear Nitro Rig

After a little A frame it was into the huge tent for one of the new signature obstacles, Valkyrie. This was a a set of rings going up and down that you can only traverse with your hands. Watching the earlier waves I noticed many missing out rings on the way down so this was my plan as well, my thinking being the less time spent hanging the better. This is largely a strength based obstacle but good technique can make it easier. I flew up and missed a couple of rings on the way down as planned. Damn that was fun!

Valkyrie

Being a short course there was no let up now, following Valkyrie it was straight into another new signature grip obstacle, the wonderfully named Sabretooth. This was a set of monkey bars that went up and down twice and it was long! Earlier in the day it had rained and I'd seen many racers struggle with this obstacle. I decided on using a side on technique on the incline sections for safety. This meant I could clamp my hands on either side of each bar which meant there was less chance of slipping off. Thankfully the rain held off for my wave and I sailed through.

undefined

youtube

Sabretooth

I knew this section would be intense but wow! Straight in to another rig! The Force 5 Rig 2 had a variety of T-bar attachments which pivoted and a spinning wheel to finish. I’d been planning my approach since I’d seen some photos of this obstacle a week or so before. The key element was the flat T-bar before the wheel which swung towards you. My plan was to reach to the furthest part with my stronger hand and pull it towards me. Then once I had a firm grip I’d 2-tap (quickly grab with my other hand) before grabbing the wheel with an alternating grip. No hesitation, just go! Swing, swing, swing, grab the wheel, hit the bell, ding!

Force 5 Rig 2

This section was always going to be demanding with so many grip obstacles in a row but I was feeling good. I’d managed my heart rate in the run up to the village to ensure I was in a position to hit each obsatcle running. With barely 10 seconds of running it was into another new obstacle, the Force 5 Low rig. Last year there were complaints that the low rig was far too easy, consisting of a bar to ring to bar. So this year they upped their game by bringing a more technical low rig. This was a lot of fun. I’d decided to go head on the whole way which worked out well but required some real core strength to keep my legs from dropping to the ground on the final transition.

Force 5 Low Rig

Next up was the new obstacle everyone was talking about in the run up to the event. The Gibbon Experience. This consisted of 5 swinging metal holds where you had to move along using 2 dowels that fitted into each hold. Essentially like keeping hold of monkey bars and placing them in each hold. This was a totally new obstacle that no one bar those at the North American Championships (where this had debuted) had attempted. Not wanting to try this for the first time in a race I’d ordered a set from obstacle builder Foz Sug. This was a tricky obstacle as it involves hanging on a single arm on a bar that can twist. This causes your hand to open up and your grip to fail quickly. So over a 2 month period I’d been practicing hanging on a single arm from one gibbon hold until my grip failed. Once I felt confident holding onto a twisting bar I worked on my technique. It became clear that swinging like you usually would on monkey bars wouldn’t work, it puts too much force through your hanging arm. So the key was a very controlled movement to place the bar into the hold with light fingers. It also involved a lot of concentration as if you miss putting the bar into the hold you are left swinging on one arm with no forward momentum.

Watching the footage from the North American Championships the majority of racers used a technique that has become known as the ‘Chicken Wing’. This involves hooking your elbows over the bars rather than hanging from it by your hands. This allows you to complete the obstacle if you don’t have the grip strength but it hurts so I had no plans to use this unless absolutely necessary.

I approached the obstacle and took a moment to collect myself. I really wanted to nail this first time. I took two wooden dowels and placed the first one into a hold. I swung out and placed the next one first time. So far so good. I then swung to the third hold but just missed it. I was left hanging on one arm, not where I wanted to be! I stayed calm as I prepared for this scenario. I tried again and got one end of the dowel in the hold. The other end was precariously placed on the edge of the hold but not properly seated. One wrong move and it would fall out and I’d be likely needing to drop and start again. Thankfully I managed to manoeuvre it into the hold. I seated the 4th first time which left one final hold. I decided to get a good swing and reach for the bell from the 4th hold, missing out the final one. Ding! Success!

Gibbon Experience

Next up was another new obstacle Force 5 over and Under. This was a very simple idea but made for an enjoyable obstacle. The premise was simple, start on top, go under and end up on top.

undefined

youtube

Force 5 Over & Under

Then it was into Triumph, this was 2 dragons backs into an under and up net climb. The Nuclear dragons backs are nice and close together and you only really need to lean out to grab the bar (although if you are afraid of heights that’s easier said than done). This one had a serious gap to jump, add to that the fact that the bar was pretty low and this was more than just a mental obstacle to overcome. 2 leaps of faith and a crawl under and up the cargo net and ding, the bell was rung.

Next up was an improved version of Skitch. Skitch debuted at the Worlds last year and consisted of 2 handheld hooks that you hang from and traverse along a bar which has a chain attached to the middle where you need to unhook each hook and transition to the other side of the chain. They clearly decided that this wasn’t hard enough so this year added a second transition. Thankfully I had practiced this and managed to clear it first time.

Not more than 30 seconds of running and it was into Skull Valley. This was a new version and arguably easier than last year’s obstacle. It had a really fun flow and was really enjoyable to complete.

Skull Valley

After smashing the Ninja Rings there was a short run through the wood to the next obstacle, the aptly named Snaked Pit. This took a page out of Hang-on Run’s book in that it was lots of ropes. I missed out every other rope and remembered Coach Scotty’s advice to get as high as possible on the rope traverse to ensure I didn’t end up sitting on the knot of the next rope.

Snake Pit

A short carry and then it was onto a new balance obstacle which was simple enough. A weaver and some tubes to slide down and it was over the final wall to the finish line. I crossed in 56th place out of 189 which put me in top 30%. Could I have pushed harder on the running between obstacles? Possibly, but would I then have cleared each obstacle first time? That’s the balance of obstacle course racing. In any case I felt strong on all the obstacle and most of all, I enjoyed myself!

0 notes

irnjehernandez · 5 years

Text

How Do You Rehab A Hip Flexor? Unlock Your Hip Flexors

Watch on YouTube here: How Do You Rehab A Hip Flexor? Unlock Your Hip Flexors Searching for How Do You Rehab A Hip Flexor? Unlock Your Hip Flexors 5 Easy Exercises to Unlock Tight Hip Flexors (with videos) Starting a regimen of hip flexor exercises to target stiff hip muscles can bring ... Unlocking Your Hip Flexors for Pain Relief and Better Performance ..... Your doctor might also recommend physical therapy to better target tight ... 5 Best Hip Flexor Stretches for Tight Hip Relief - WebMD Your hip flexors are a group of muscles near the top of your thighs that are key players in moving your lower body. They let you to walk, kick, ... Guardian Muscles: 3 stretches to unlock your hip flexors and generate ... Guardian Muscles: 3 Stretches to Unlock Your Hip Flexors and Generate Huge ... "Hip flexor tightness tilts the pelvis permanently forward, a condition known as ... Hip Flexor Exercises: Strengthen and Stretch - Healthline They're a vital part of our bodies, yet sitting most of the day can contribute to tight hip flexors. These hip flexor exercises can help keep your hips strong and ... How to Relieve Sore Hip Flexors | Shape If your hip flexors are hurting, chances are you know what's causing it-too ... in your glutes, says Allison Heffron, D.C., a chiropractor at rehabilitation clinic ... The largest of the hip flexor muscles are the psoas muscle, which wraps from ..... HipFlexor.org will unlock your hip flexors and restore movement the way it should be. Hips Don't Lie - How to Unlock Tight Hips | RISE Physical Therapy Located in front of your hip you have your hip flexors, these muscles often get tight and stiff when sitting ... Hip Flexor and Adductor Stretch (see images below). 12 Hip Stretches Your Body Really Needs | SELF Add a few of them to your daily routine to stretch your hips and start feeling better now. ... Tight hip flexors make it harder for your pelvis to rotate properly, which .... Squeeze your butt; this will allow you to stretch your hip flexor even more. .... SELF does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Unlock Your Hip Flexors: Sports & Outdoors - Amazon.com Unlock Your Hip Flexors. +. OPTP The Original Stretch Out Strap with Exercise Poster Top Choice of Physical Therapists & Athletic. +. RehabZone Hip and Knee ... Things directly related to How Do You Rehab a Hip Flexor? Unlock Your Hip Flexors: hip flexors exercises, unlock hip flexors psoas, unlock your hip flexors pdf, unlock your hip flexors review, tight hip flexors test, unlock your hip flexors 10 exercises, hip flexors stretch, unlock your hip flexors manual pdf How Do You Rehab A Hip Flexor? Unlock Your Hip Flexors

0 notes

chickensarentcheap · 4 years

Text

I Found

Chapter 4

Warnings: profanity

This is also being posted on Ao3 and I will post a link when it is!

Tagging: @c-a-v-a-l-r-y @alievans007 @hemmyworthy

He watches them out of the corner of his eye; the baby in the middle of the blanket enjoying some 'tummy time', clad in a white swimsuit dotted with bright rainbow fish, a tiny sunhat perched a top of her head. His wife in that simple yet sexy black one piece bathing suit, an undearmour ball cap she'd snagged from his side of the room pulled low on her forehead, her legs folded crisscrossed and her eyes riveted on the book in her lap.

He reaches out and runs his fingers along his arm, and she casts a glance in his direction. Softly smiling as she entwines her fingers with his and places their joined hands on her thigh.

He sighs. “I know.”

“That's Dhaka's problem to worry about. Not ours.”

“It won't be long until it's on our doorstep. Nik will call soon. Don't be surprised.”

“She can call all the fuck she wants. There's nothing I can do to help. Best I can do is train some guys and give out advice and come up with plans. That's where I'm at these days.”

“You're a hundred times better than you were a year ago. And she knows that. She'll expect more from you.”

“Let her. I know my limits. I'm not the man I was a year ago. You think I'm close to it. I'm not. You have too much faith in me.”

“Well...” she sighs. “...someone has to have faith in you.”

And there it is. The honest to goodness truth. She's not saying it to be hurtful. He knows that. She's saying it because he needs to hear it.

“Why are we even talking about this?” Tyler inquires, trying not to let the aggravation seep from his voice.

“Just making conversation.”

She drags her teeth against her bottom lip. The smile is gone now. Those eyes have darkened.

“What's going on?” he presses. “You're usually the one asking me that but now it's my turn. What's wrong?”

“Ovi messaged me,” her hand tightens around his. She doesn't look at him. “While you were at the gym this morning.”

Usually he's the one that Ovi is contacting. Texts. Emails. Facetime. She and the kid are tight, but nowhere near as tight as he is with Tyler. They lived thousands of miles away but they kept the bond alive. Ovi had followed every step of his medical journey and his rehab and his struggle to get back on his feet. He'd come to their wedding. Met their daughter through a live feed. He even liked to call himself 'Uncle Ovi'. And Tyler had taken him under his wing once again. This time providing him with the guidance and the nurturing that only a father can do for their teenage soon And he was the closest thing that kid had to a father.