#fenris and his disgust

[jacklyn-flynn]

Isabela decides to leave an illustrated erotic book around each of her companions just to see what their reactions are. 

Merrill helpfully returns it to Aveline by leaving it on her desk. Because she’s married so it has to be hers, right? She swears she didn’t look at it. That would be rude. 

Aveline shoves it into a desk drawer, muttering about Donnic, and then pretends she didn’t see anything. 

Varric: “Oh, research!”

Fenris burns it. 

Sebastian spontaneously bursts into flames in the middle of the Chantry. 

Hawke very casually picks it up and puts it on their bookshelf. 

Anders pretends to be disgusted but looks at a few pages when he thinks no one is looking.

Bethany leaves it in the Tower library on one of the tables for the same reason Isabela left it. Later, they share the results. 

Carver rips out a few pages and then leaves it exactly where he found it.  

#headcanon du jour #hdj #dragon age #dragon age 2 #da2 #isabela and her dirty mind #merrill and her helpfullness #aveline and her embarrassment #donnic who has no idea he's even involved in this #varric's delight #fenris and his disgust #sebastian's demise #hawke's expanding library #anders sneaks a peek #bethany is dirtier than she'd admit #carver is too #it runs in the family

[berrymeter]

took a minute to think about dragon age & my blood pressure has successfully risen again. imagine if they wrote the games good

#perth.txt #absolutely disgusting everything surrounding mages templars elves qunari #cullen being written so bad that i didn't even catch onto how bad he was bc my first game was inquisition #like yea hes fine if youve only played that game bc hes an entirely different person... #anders supporting awful shit when it comes to fenris is such bullshit & makes no sense #vivienne... (through tears) vivienne it doesn't have to be like this please........... #this is without getting into the lore itself... i am too tired for this right now #next game if he even shows up cullen should try actually making up for his past actions

[bubbles-for-all-of-us]

Are you requests open yet, right?

Can you make something with Fenrys, like, him and reader are mates, and they are trying to get a child for so long, and one day they discover that they are expecting.

(I really liked your writing, and very few people write about him, so I wanted to thank you for this 💕)

Had a blast writing this truly. Thank you for requesting and the kind words, I hope you'll enjoy it. 🤍✨

Little pup

At first, you didn't talk about it. You both were still young and for the most part, had wanted to explore the world together. Just you two. Try new things. See new places. Travel. Indulge in each other's company. And the mating frenzy hit you so hard that you didn't leave your house for over a month. And by then you were convinced that everyone passing by could smell the sex lingering all around.

And yet even in that month, it wasn't about getting pregnant. Fenrys was learning how to please you and you were doing the same. It was the desire to explore that drove you. To bring each other immense pleasure. Till the last breaking point. Till the moment all you could see was stars. Till furniture was breaking. But the thought of conceiving never crossed your mind.

But it's the first time your period is late and you're feeling so weird that Aelin had to drag you to the healer's level. It's the joyful smile on the woman's face when she says, "Oh you might as well be pregnant", that breaks this bubble of cold water over your head. "How exciting would that be? Babies are so rare and to have one ahh...", the healer beams as she ushers you to lay down. You reach for Aelin's hand almost instantly. The nerve suddenly so uneasy in your chest.

And then the healer's face drops and so does your heart. Sadness washes over you and it's like you had lost something you didn't even think you wanted five minutes ago. "You started your circle, darling", she says lowering your skirt down and you just want to crawl into yourself. "Ah, yes", you quickly move to get down the table. Glad your back is to the two women as you quickly wipe your tears. Suddenly feeling so frustrated. You feel Fenrys tugging on the bond yet that only makes your heart ache more so you push him out of your head quickly. Drowsing the bond in complete darkness.

Fenrys comes home way earlier than he should have been there. And you know it's because he would always drop anything for you. High stake leaders waiting for the meeting? Fuck them! His mate needs him so he's leaving and gods save the souls who try to stand in his way.

He knows by the silence that something had happened. Something that upset you. Ticked you over. Then Fenrys smells the blood. Gears turning before he realizes that your cycle had finally shown up but why the sense of sorrow then? This feeling of pain makes him rub his chest as he too tries to soothe the aching.

"My, love", Fenrys shrugs his cloak off carelessly, stepping closer to the bed. You're completely submerged by the furs all over your body. He makes a quick work of pushing them to the side until your wet cheeks come into sight and Fenry's heart drop even more. "Love", he breathes out in worry. But that only makes your tears well up more. A choked-out sob leaves your lips before you move to push away from your mate. That jabs Fenry's heart too.

"Love, if you don't tell me what's going on...", and then this shien of anger washes over you. Painting your cheeks in even more crimson shades. "Talk to you? Talk about what, huh?", you leap at him, fist coming in contact with Fenrys's strong chest.

But then you draw your hands back, looking at them with so much disgust. Fenrys steps in quickly taking your smaller palms into his. Your mind was too chaotic for him to read now. So he had to trust you to let him in on your own time. "What is going on...", you mutter, "You're overwhelmed and your body is full of hormones", even Fenrys frown at his own words but that's the truth in a way. The question still stands though. What caused all of this? "I thought I was...", you breathe through the sobs, "Thought we had...", and then it's full-on sobs, till your legs give out and Fenrys quickly wraps you up in his arms, rocking you from time to time.

There's no way to tell how long you've been crying by the time you're only sniffling. Eyes puffy and red, holding onto Fenrys for dear life. And he had run out of comforting words by then, opting for silence and love that he poured through the bond. You push away from him slightly. Knowing full well that you owe him an explanation. Because he too would have been a part of this if you had been pregnant. Your eyes well up with tears once more as you glance at him and Fenrys is ready to cradle you once more but you stop him. "I saw a healer this morning. She thought that I might...", you swallow the lump in your throat, shoulders sagging, "might be... pregnant". Fenrys's heart jumps up his throat. Suddenly he's almost hyper-aware of his surroundings. Threats. Smells. Sounds. But then nothing. And then just like before it all falls into place.

This. All of this was because you weren't. Because there wasn't a babe growing in your womb. No little Fenrys, or Y/N. And it's almost like another slap to his face because he only now realizes that you never really talked about it. Becoming parents. Growing your family. Being together and having one another was comforting enough. But seeing you like this. "I'm sorry...", you whisper and Fenrys draws his gaze back to you. "What for love? There's nothing to be sorry for", he brushes your loose hair away from your face.

"For not being pregnant", Fenrys frown at your words. And frowns so deep that his eyebrows nearly come together. "Now you take that back", his hands cup your face, "You take that back and never dare to apologize for something like this".

And you know that it comes from his heart because he loves you. Because no matter what you do he will always be there. "What if I can't?", you ask him, biting your lip, "Then we won't have any and that will be more than enough because we would have one another", he's quick to reassure you. And once more from the way his eyes are gleaming you know that he means it. "Come here", he mutters m, bringing you back into his arms, and wrapping it up in the comfort of his warmth. Drowning out the world around you.

All of this leads to a long conversation about children. One that you share late at night, both tangled between the sheets. Let the stars and the moon be the only witnesses of your wishes and dreams. And you both know that's so rare. And something that many couples don't even get close to. Fenrys knows how he and his brother Connall had come pretty late into their parent's lives. But then what a blessing it was to have two babies. Yet the time span was what scared him the most. Not because he was desperate. Don't get him wrong he wanted to see you pregnant. Know that it's his baby growing within you. But he could tell how fragile this topic made you. How you would shiver any time someone brought up the conversation of babies. How you would halt at the sight of younglings running around in the streets. How you forced a smile once Ellide got pregnant and you had brushed away your sad tears saying that it was only happy crying.

And it's only a handful of years later. Many disappointing visits to the healers later that you jolt up in the morning rushing to the bathroom. Fenrys is out of bed just as fast, darting after you and reaching to hold your hair out of your face as you emptied your stomach into the toilet. His hands rub comforting circles over your back. Your skin looks clammy and pale and it makes Fenrys sick to his stomach as well.

Because what if all the sorrows had finally eaten you from within in? What if he had missed something? Overlooked you not eating well, not sleeping enough. Your head drops to the side, and Fenrys quickly turns you over, reaching for the tap before flickering water over your face. If an illness claimed your life... if he would be left alone...it's a selfish thought but one that has been his number one fear ever since he saw you for the very first time.

"I'm fine", you groggily say and Fenrys only huffs, "Fine my ass, you're barely conscious". Those are harsher words than he wishes that thrown your way but he's so worried. So worried his own eyes are blurry. Then he moves up quickly, you tightly pressed to his chest. "Fen, I just need to lay down", but he doesn't listen as he throws the door open. Not caring that he's shirtless, or that you are only wearing one of his shirts. He rushes down the hallway, yet he's still mindful of not shaking you too much.

The healers haven't even finished their morning preparations when he storms in, eyes wild. The healer who had been tending to you for years now jumps up instantly. "I don't know what's happening", Fenrys admits as he lowers you onto the bed. The lady presses her palm onto your forehead before cradling your cheek. "Y/N, what's hurting?", she asks softly but you only shake your head. Her mouth falls into a tight frown and she orders a couple of other healers around, turning to Fenrys so he would tell her what happened.

"When was the last time you ate, girl?", she asks strictly, fingers running over your stomach. "Breakfast", you breathe out, "yesterday". Fenrys growls in frustration. He had returned home late last night, you had already been asleep and so he never even thought about the fact that he didn't ask anyone on his way up if you had been down to eat dinner. The healer shakes her head, "Silly, silly girl. Mirth, bring the lady some light breakfast and a tart", she says even though you turn to protest. "You're with child and this is all stunt you pulled here is because you didn't eat", every sound in the room dies down. Your eyes grow big and for a moment you're sure you just mistaken her words. Surely not... but it's the way Fenrys is looking at the healer with the same surprised eyes that makes you realize that he heard it too.

"Congratulations you two. A strong heartbeat", she carefully presses her palm to your shoulder. Knowing full well that once the information fully settled in Fenrys's brain anyone that would get near the slight swell in your lower stomach would be marked an enemy. The wolf closes the distance between you two. He doesn't yet trust his words so he just leans in pressing his forehead to yours. And now that it's been brought up you do smell slightly different. And the heartbeat. How did he miss the heartbeat? What kind of father will he be if he missed his child growing inside you?

"The best kind", you mutter, "the best kind of father", your hand cups his cheek, and the white wolf instantly nuzzles closer to you. He kisses the side of your head, brushing the tears from your cheeks. "Our baby", he mumbles, pressing his palm to your stomach, "Our little pup", you put your hand over his. And then Fenrys breaks into fits of giggles as he brings you closer into his arms. You too can't help the smile even if the dizziness still lingers. And you suddenly feel complete as if this was all that was missing. Now the picture would be complete. "A father, my beautiful mate will make me a father", he beams, brushing his lips against yours in a messy kiss, but the door swings open as the younger healer walks in with a trey. The laughter stops and Fenrys is snarling at the door, teeth out. Your hands push against his chest softly, "Darling, she means no harm", you reassure him yet his eyes don't leave the poor girl now shaking by the door. "Thought you seen him protective, girl? Welcome to the next stage", the older healer chuckles as she hands you the sweet bun.

#fenrys x reader #fenrys moonbeam x reader #fenrys moonbeam #fenrys moonbeam imagine #fenrys imagine #throne of glass imagine #throne of glass x reader #tog x reader #tog imagine #rowan whitethorn #lorcan lochan salvatorre #gavriel

[rowaelinsdaughter]

can i request a fic with fenrys where reader is super protective of him, especially after they’re freshly mated bc faes are protective and territorial. Imagine some general in doranelle says something about him being enslaved to maeves bedroom, fenrys gets sad snd disgusted with himself and reader literally jumps on the general and almost kills him bc she’s so protective and hates seeing fen in any kind of pain

author note: omg, I LOVED THIS!!!! fenrys is one of my fav tog characters and i love him. thank u so much for requesting this <33, i've changed a few things, and I hope it doesn't matter

𝕴 𝖘𝖊𝖊 𝖗𝖊𝖉 ( 𝕱𝖊𝖓𝖗𝖞𝖘 𝖝 𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖉𝖊𝖗)

WARNINGS: PTSD, d@ggers, blood, angst and fluff, SPOILERS THRONE OF GLASS

You met Fenrys in Skull Bay.

Being the only two female assassins trained by Arobynn, you decided to form an alliance that became friendship. Thanks to a spell from before magic left, you were able to hide your fae features.

You knew Aelin's secret back then, and you swore to take it to the grave with you.

When he was in Endovier, you did everything you could to repay the debt to Arobynn. In the end, paid every single coin. After the tests to be the king's assassin, the trip to Wendlyn and the destruction of the crystal castle, you followed her and supported her through everything. What brought you to the Bay. Where you met Fenrys.

While Aelin and the others were in Rolfe's office, you stayed outside with Fenrys and Gavriel, this one trying to ignore your flirtations. You felt attracted to him. As if a thread came out of your heart, traveling through the universe until it reached it. But you didn't tell him, and after the fateful day on the beach and the war, the two of you decided to wait for each other, because you knew that the loss of one or the other would kill you.

It had been a month since the war ended and the bond was still fresh.

The constant desire to be together, the sleepless nights, were constant.

You knew everything he had been through and that only made your instincts activate in the face of any danger, like now.

Terrasen and Wendlyn still had their tensions, and right now the emissaries of the two nations were meeting in the meeting room of Orynth Castle.

Everyone knew the Cadre and envy and disgust appeared on each of their faces when they looked at Fenrys.

Sitting next to him and holding hands under the table, you tried to calm him down by caressing his hand and sending love through the bow.

Until…

“I'm surprised to see you here Fenrys, tell me, are you warming the bed of the queen of Terrasen now?”

There was silence, every muscle in your body tenses and you only see red.

You notice the sadness and shame in your mate’s features and that is the trigger.

One moment you were at his side and the next you were on top of the emissary with a dagger at his neck.

Your knee digs into his chest and with your other foot you immobilize his hand. You get close to his face and loudly so that everyone can hear you, you say:

“Listen to me very well because I'm not going to repeat it twice.” A trickle of blood runs down his neck thanks to the pressure you exert. “I'm not going to allow you to talk like that about MY mate, so think twice, because next time I'll kill you, understand?”

Arms lift you up and, thanks to Fenrys' powers, in the blink of an eye you are in your room.

His hands cup your face and he pulls you closer to rest his forehead against yours.

You sigh, closing your eyes, relaxing thanks to his presence. Your hands also rest on his cheeks, wiping away the tears that are now running down his cheeks.

You open your eyes and Fenrys was already looking at you with so much adoration and love that your eyes filled with tears.

“I don't know what I did to deserve you, but every day I thank destiny for having found you.”

Unable to hold on and with your heart pounding at his words, you kiss him, transmitting all your love.

Fenrys had been through too much and you weren't going to let anyone or anything hurt him.

𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒓𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒔 𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒆𝒓𝒗𝒆𝒅 ©𝒓𝒐𝒘𝒂𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒔𝒅𝒂𝒖𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒆𝒓. 𝒅𝒐 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒄𝒐𝒑𝒚 / 𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒂𝒍 𝒎𝒚 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒌. 𝒅𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒄𝒐𝒑𝒚 𝒎𝒚 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒎𝒆.

#sarah j maas #sjm books #throne of glass #throne of glass imagine #fenrys moonbeam #fanfic #fenrys x reader #throne of glass fanfiction #aelin galythinius #manon blackbeak #dorian havilliard #rowan whitethorn

[lorcandidlucienwill]

Ranking the top 10 most pathetic SJM men

10: Ithan Holstrom Come on, if you didn't think him simping for Bryce after knowing her for like 5 seconds was pathetic then idk what is. Also, him being mad about the Fendyr heir being enslaved and stealing fire sprites for revenge will never not be hilarious

9: Fenrys Moonbeam Bro was so desperate to escape Maeve that he almost killed himself. Then he had that "You'd rather my queen die than your king" line. Like bro is Aelin's dog at this point.

8. Eris Vanserra Thanks to @kateduchessofdolittle for making me see how pathetic Eris is.

-Fiancee goes to *great lengths* to get out their engagement. After all that, bro still bailed her out by dealing with her father Keir in ACOSF

- Got to be a passive little bitch to monster father

- seems to be a surrogate father to the *worst* people

- he's giving mama's boy

- his allies taunt him with another engagement and she laughs in his face too

At least he has his dogs.

7. Hunt Athalar Not sure how to explain this one. It's just the *vibes*

6. Tarquin Poor Tarquin. I felt so bad for him during that Feyre-Tarquin scene in ACOMAF (one of these days I shall write the Feyquin fanfic and rectify Feyre's mistakes here).

5. Ruhn Danaan You may be surprised Ruhn is so high up on this list. But bro, Hypaxia duped him so badly. Also, he was so desperate to get back in his sister Bryce's good books. Here are just a few examples from the book:

Ruhn bared his teeth at Maximus as the glowering vamp headed toward the golden steps. “Riso called me a few minutes ago and said you were here. With that fucking creep.” “Excuse me?” Her voice sharpened. It had nothing to do with the fact that she highly doubted the diplomatic club owner had used those terms. Riso was more the type to say, She’s with someone who might cause the dancing to cease. Which would have been Riso’s idea of Hel. Ruhn said, “Riso can’t risk tossing Tertian to the curb—he implied the prick was being handsy and you needed backup.” A purely predatory gleam entered her brother’s eyes. “Don’t you know what Tertian’s father does?” She grinned, and knew it didn’t reach her eyes. None of her smiles did these days. “I do,” she said sweetly. Ruhn shook his head in disgust. Bryce leaned forward to grab her drink, each movement controlled—if only to keep from taking the water and throwing it in his face. “Shouldn’t you be home?” Ruhn asked. “It’s a weekday. You’ve got work in six hours.” “Thanks, Mom,” she said.

She just opened the door. “If you hear anything about the Viper Queen, call me.” Ruhn stiffened, his heart thundering. “Do not provoke her.” “Bye, Ruhn.” He was desperate enough that he said, “I’ll go with you to—” “Bye.”

She flinched as Ruhn said at her ear, “You don’t need to see this.” This was another murder. Another body. Another year. A medwitch even knelt before the body, a wand buzzing with firstlight in her hands, trying to piece the corpse—the girl—back together. Ruhn tugged her away, toward the screen and open air beyond— The movement shook her loose. Snapped the droning in her ears. She yanked her body free from his grip, not caring if anyone else saw, not caring that he, as head of the Fae Aux units, had the right to be here. “Don’t fucking touch me.” Ruhn’s mouth tightened. But he looked over her shoulder to Hunt. “You’re an asshole.”

Ruhn was in the apartment lobby when Fury dropped her off. Tharion left them at the docks, saying he was going to help haul in the seized synth shipment, and Fury departed fast enough that Bryce knew she was heading out to make sure the Viper Queen didn’t abscond with any of it, either. Ruhn said nothing as they rode the elevator. But she knew Fury had told him. Summoned him here. Her friend had been messaging someone on the walk back from the docks. And she’d spied Flynn and Declan standing guard on the rooftops of her block, armed with their long-range rifles. Her brother didn’t speak until they were in the apartment, the place dark and hollow and foreign. Every piece of clothing and gear belonging to Hunt was like an asp, ready to strike. That bloodstain on the couch was the worst of all. Bryce made it halfway across the great room before she puked all over the carpet. Ruhn was instantly there, his arms and shadows around her. She could feel her sobs, hear them, but they were distant. The entire world was distant as Ruhn picked her up and carried her to the couch, keeping away from that spot where she’d yielded herself entirely to Hunt. But he made no comment about the bloodstain or any lingering scent. 4. Lucien Vanserra (or Spell-Cleaver? Vanserra sounds better)

Ah, Lucien, Lucien, Lucien. My poor baby just wants somebody to marry him. Does it get any more pathetic than "I'm a mated male now?" My man prepares for rejection every holiday without fail. He and Lucien did not exchange gifts, though the male had brought a gift for Feyre and one for his mate, who barely thanked him after opening the pearl earrings. Cassian’s heart strained at the pain etching deep into Lucien’s face as he tried to hide his disappointment and longing. 3. Chaol Westfall I don't think many people remember Lithaen, but Chaol was in love with her and she fucked Dorian's cousin instead. Also there was this:

Babe, ily but wtf. You ran into a different fucking dimension to save your ex-girlfriend's DOG??? Talk about pathetic. 2. Lorcan Salvaterre Bro abandoned the queen he served more loyally than any of the rest of the cadre the moment a tiny little human with witch blood showed a little cleavage and bossed him around. Bro wanted to be someone's bitch SO BAD. He RIPPED his shirts up for her periods even after she refused to even speak with him and said she hopes he's miserable and spends the rest of his life alone (and threatened to gut Rowan and Gavriel if they ever told her it was him). He swore a blood oath to his greatest enemy just to protect her and lost the will to live when she called him a monster. Absolutely fucking pathetic and we love him for it. 1. Tamlin It was a close fight to first, but nobody can beat Tamlin in the pathetic category. For one, of all the love interests we have seen, he is in possession of the least rizz. Negative rizz, actually. Lucien actually roasted him so badly for his negative rizz, and Lucien personally backed off so Tamlin and his negative rizz could rizz up Feyre. Bro sacrificed all of PRYTHIAN to keep Feyre safe, bartered with his enemy to get her back, only to have her destroy his court. Even after that, he saved her life at the Hybern camp and revived her mate. And unlike the others above, he didn't get the girl, and probably won't get any girl, actually. We could always put him up for adoption and one of the members of the fandom can take him? Maybe??? Maybe @kateduchessofdolittle will take him.

#ithan holstrom #fenrys moonbeam #eris vanserra #hunt athalar #tarquin #ruhn danaan #lucien vanserra #chaol westfall #lorcan salvaterre #tamlin

[tswaney17]

I Do Bad Things with You - Part 43

It's aliveeeeeee!!! 🙌 I can't even begin to describe how off my game I've been trying to write. I've had the entirety of IDBTWY written for months, but I honestly hated my writing, and editing was such a chore. I'm still not completely in love, but we need to push past so we can finally close this beast. I am slowly working through my creative drought, and hope to have some consistent content coming soon!

Also, credit to @123moiaussi for the "superseed" comment. 😉

My fanfic account: @tswaney17fics​​​

My ao3 account: tswaney17

Please let me know what you think about this update. I love getting your feedback. Constructive criticism is always welcome. 💕

Catch up here.

Credit to @featherymalignancy for Cassian’s nickname, Cash. 😘

Trigger warnings: violence, sexual assault , language, NSFW

Word Count: 6,187

Elain was sitting in the waiting room of the OBGYN office, knee bouncing nervously. This was her first-trimester check-up and she just wanted to make sure that everything was okay. Her nausea had been pretty awful over the last few weeks and she had grown excessively tired—to the point that she had to talk with Thesan about reducing her surgical procedures so she could keep a clear head.

She hated having to do that, not wanting to disappoint her boss just after she reached her attending level earlier that year. But Thesan took it in stride, helping to arrange her schedule to fit what she was comfortable doing and ensuring she had time to take proper meal breaks and rest when she needed it. He rearranged schedules and let her take on leading the resident interns full-time, allowing her to take some of the stress off by guiding them through procedures and running the ER.

He had come into her hospital room after she collapsed to check on her, and she knew she couldn’t keep it from him after what had happened in the operating room. Her boss had been ecstatic, congratulating them both.

It had been about a month since they found out they were pregnant, and she was now sitting at around seven and a half weeks along. She and Azriel decided to keep the news to themselves until she reached week twelve, just to play it safe, and Elain wished she could say they had been successful in their endeavors. But, her boss knew, and Viviane knew. The Moonbeam twins found out two weeks ago when she and Fenrys had exited the elevator of their building and Connall’s breakfast sandwich sent her hurdling for the nearest trashcan. Fen had been quick to slide her hair back, holding it above her head as she heaved. Stepping off the elevator a few minutes later, a startled and confused Azriel took in the sight of Connall and then heard her retching. He instantly was at her side, taking her hair from Fenrys, and running his hand down her back.

“What is in that sandwich,” he demanded.

Blind-sighted, Con rambled out ingredients. “Bacon, cheese, spinach, and egg.”

Elain gagged at the word egg, her stomach violently rolling from the name. “Get rid of it,” she moaned, still leaning into the disgusting garbage.

The dark-haired twin had swallowed the remains of his meal in three large bites.

It took effort to push herself off the trash bin, falling into the comforting embrace of Az’s strong arms that he wrapped around her.

He cupped the side of her face, tucking her under his chin, and let her thumb swoop over the apple of her cheek, the touch gentle and soothing. “Do you want your tea,” he murmured, lips pressing into her hair.

Unable to voice it answer, she dipped her chin.

Fenrys was already on the ground before them, pulling her coffee mug from her bag that she dropped and handing it to Azriel.

Her husband brought the mug up to her lips and allowed her to sip, the peppermint hitting her stomach and calming the raging sea. His hazel eyes glanced at her, a question simmering in them, and read the answer she didn’t even need to speak. “Elain’s pregnant,” he told the twins. “It’s still very early and we’re trying to keep it close to the chest for now, but please don’t bring eggs anywhere near her.”

Her body shuddered at that damn word again, but she managed to gain enough strength to pull herself from Azriel’s arms as she faced the Moonbeam brothers. “Sorry about that,” she said and felt her husband tense as she apologized for being sick. He’d been wildly adamant that she not apologize for the nausea, the cravings, or anything else she needed of him or anyone else. Not after having a meltdown because he went and got her something she asked for, only to start craving something else when he was out and feeling utterly ridiculous about it.

Connall seemed to snap from his shock first. “Congratulations to you both. And I apologize for the sandwich. I won’t bring anything around that has—”

“Please don’t say the word or I might hurl again,” she interrupted, fingertips touching her mouth like she’d hold it back. Fuck, even just the name of it sent her body quaking from the queasiness.

Fen chuckled. “Noted. Is there anything else that sets you off we should be made aware of?”

She shook her head no. “Nothing else that I know of yet.”

He nodded, a charming smile spreading his lips. “Let us know if anything changes. And congratulations on the pregnancy. I’m so happy for you both.”

And she could see it, the joy radiating on both of their faces. It made her heart swell with love for the two men who would likely become Uncle Fen and Uncle Con to their child.

The door opening caught her attention, pulling her from her reverie, and she met the gaze of the nurse who’d come to collect her. Elain glanced back at the elevator, waiting for her husband to show up. He was running late—something that was so very unlike him, which only added to her anxiety. She returned her attention to the nurse. “Can you give him another couple of minutes?”

It wasn’t the first time she asked to delay her appointment and knew it couldn’t continue much longer.

The nurse—Maria as her name badge read—gave her a sad smile. “We really can’t delay much longer. There are a few appointments behind you.”

“Just a couple of minutes,” Elain practically begged.

Maria hedged, shuffling from foot to foot, uncomfortable by the request, but was saved from having to deny her by the elevator door sliding open and Azriel rushing out.

He was at her side instantly, taking her arm to help her stand as if she couldn’t do it herself. Elain had to remind him on occasion that she was not yet showing and could still move about the house without his assistance. “I’m so sorry I’m late. There was an accident downtown and I got caught right in the middle of traffic. I’ll leave a half hour earlier next time.” He leaned down to brush his lips to her cheek.

His presence immediately calmed her and she leaned into his touch.

Azriel, always in tune with her feelings, didn’t miss how she settled into him as they followed the nurse back, his arm slinking around her waist so he could touch his mouth to her ear. “Are you all right?” he asked her. Nothing ever got by him.

She nodded but knew he hadn’t bought it. Still, he let it slide, caressing her arm in a soothing gesture. The nurse took all her vitals and then handed her a gown to change into before the doctor arrived. Az helped her slip it on, tying the strings together for her before assisting her onto the table.

“You’re nervous,” he commented now that they were alone.

Elain blew out a breath. “A bit.”

He swept his thumb over her cheek. “Tell me what’s wrong.”

She shrugged. “I don’t know to be honest. Just want to make sure everything is growing healthy in there,” she said, patting her still-flat stomach. “No surprises.”

Az chuckled, kissing her temple. “I have no doubts that we have a healthy baby, love. Try not to fret.” His words seemed to calm her as she relaxed back onto the table.

A knock on the door announced the arrival of her doctor and she took a moment to introduce herself to her husband, shaking his hand.

“Okay, let’s get started. Elain, if you wouldn’t mind putting your feet into the stirrups.”

She took out the ultrasound wand, spreading lube on the tip, and Elain couldn’t help but smile at her husband’s confused face.

“All right, my dear. You should feel a little pressure,” her doctor said.

“I’m sorry, but I thought she was getting an ultrasound. What is that?” Azriel questioned.

Elain snorted lightly. “Az, it’s a transvaginal ultrasound. It goes inside, not on my belly.”

His eyes widened. “Well, the three baby books I’ve read didn’t discuss the differences in ultrasound types.”

Doctor Chen raised her brows. “You’ve read three baby books already?”

He shrugged. “I just like to be prepared.”

“You’re going to be a great father.”

The comment seemed to startle her husband. “Just because I’ve read a few books?”

Chen’s lips turned up at the corner. “Mr. Archeron-Knight, I can barely get most fathers to read one, let alone three. And before she’s even through the first trimester. Believe me when I say that I can tell who’s going to be well-adjusted to handling fatherhood.” Giving him a wink, she slipped the wand inside, making Elain’s grip on Azriel’s hand tighten slightly.

“All right, here we are,” Doctor Chen said, clicking a few buttons on the keyboard to bring up the monitor. A pitter-patter sound filled the air as she located the baby’s heartbeat.

Tears sprung into her eyes as that beautiful, perfect, innocent noise washed over her and she glanced up at her husband to see him sharing the same look as her. He leaned down to kiss her softly on the lips, the special moment between them growing with the touch of his mouth against hers.

“And here is your baby,” Chen announced, pointing to a little blip on the screen.

Elain’s dark gaze stared at that spot on the screen, feeling like her heart was about to burst with happiness. But when her eyes slid to her doctor, seeing the furrow in her brow, that joy dropped like a rock in her stomach.

Her doctor let out a small noise of contemplation, enough to catch Azriel’s attention. “What is it?” he asked, voice laced with demand and worry.

A few clicks on her keyboard had the screen adjusting, zooming out just slightly. She repositioned the wand inside of her, making her body tense. “Well, I think we should discuss multiple births. Because that right there,” she said, pointing to another blip on the screen, “is a second fetus.” She clicked a button again and two very distinct heartbeats surrounded them. Chen turned to look at them with a smile. “You’re having twins.”

If Elain thought her heart was racing before, it was absolutely pounding now, the sound rushing in her ears. Because there was just no way, no way, right? Twins? Twins! Her head swiveled to look up at her husband. “You and your fucking superseed!” she snarled.

“Elain!” Azriel chastised, looking torn between being guilty of impregnating her with two kids and amused about her foul language in front of the doctor. Mostly the latter.

Chen just laughed. “I’ve told many expecting parents they’re having twins over the years, but that was, by far, the best reaction I’ve ever seen.”

She had the decency to at least look embarrassed as she apologized to her doctor for her outburst, but she just waved her off.

After snapping a few pictures, she pulled the wand out, cleaned her up, and set the printed sonogram photos on the counter for them. “Everything looks good, Elain. You’re growing at an optimum level. I’ll go ahead and prescribe you some anti-nausea medicine that you can take in the morning and before bed for as long as you need it. Unless there are any concerns, you’re free to get dressed. The nurse at the front will schedule you for your next appointment.”

The door clicked shut softly behind her as she left and Elain felt the silence between her and Azriel like a weight on her chest.

He helped her sit up, but before she could slide off the table, he stepped in front of her, finger hooking under her chin to force her gaze to his. “Hey,” he said softly like he was afraid anything louder might startle her. “El, love, I know this is scary, but we can do this.”

“Twins, Azriel. Two kids. As in one whole being more than we even were planning for.”

His mouth quirked up at her zealous explanation. “I’m well aware of how twins work, baby.”

She glared at him for the comment.

But he ignored it, leaning down to capture her mouth in a sweet kiss. “Twins mean two beautiful children of our own. Twins mean twice the amount of love we will have. Twice the amount of joy they will be bringing into our lives. If there is anyone who can take on the challenge of having twins, it’s us. Don’t ever doubt that.”

His words settled inside of her, soothing the jagged worries of her heart into something perfectly beautiful. His confidence, his strength…it was exactly what she needed at that moment and he knew it.

Elain let out a heavy breath. “You’re changing all the diapers.”

He barked out a laugh, folding her into his arms. “I’m okay with that.”

~~~

They decided to wait until she reached the fifteen-week mark before they told their family the news. Azriel was ready to burst at week nine, but she managed to hold him off until now with just a little bit of persuasion.

A surprise to both of them was when Elain didn’t have her head in the toilet, she was horny as fuck. Azriel was running hard to keep up with her impressive sex drive. And that was saying something.

He reached out and took her hand across the center console, thumb brushing over her knuckles. “Are you nervous?” he asked, bringing the back of her palm to his lips.

She glanced at him, a soft smile pulling at her mouth. “No. I’m excited. I want to tell everyone about them.” Her hand rubbed over her swollen belly. Swollen was probably the best way to describe her appearance. Truthfully, she looked like she indulged in a very large, carb-based meal of pasta and was extremely bloated from it. Which, to be fair, with Azriel’s amazing skills in the kitchen, it was a fair assessment.

Elain opened her purse and slipped out the sonogram she had a few days before. The one that told them what they were having. Her eyes welled up with tears as her fingers stroked the black-and-white image. She was so blissfully happy. “I’m glad that they’re healthy. That was all I cared about.”

Az kissed the backside of her palm again. “Me too. And I’m happy they’ll be close to Sutton’s age so they can grow up together.”

“Do you think Feyre and Rhys will start thinking about having kids?” she asked, curious if he thought their other siblings might be feeling a touch of the baby fever.

He shrugged. “If they weren’t talking about it before, I’d say they will be now. Rhys has been wanting kids since practically in high school. He always wanted to be a father; better than his, though he wasn’t anything compared to mine.” The words hung between them for a minute before he asked her, “Do you have concerns about me becoming my father?” His voice dropped to a near whisper. Almost as if he were afraid of her answer.

Elain looked at him in shock. “Azriel, gods no. I know exactly the kind of father you’ll be, and it will not even remotely look like what you were given.”

His lips quirked up at the corner. “Yeah? And what kind of a father do you think I’ll be?”

She twisted in her seat to face him better. “You’re going to be the most devoted father because you’re already the most devoted husband. You’ll dote on those kids until they never have a wish or dream unfulfilled. You will love them fiercely—I mean, you already do and they’re still in my stomach,” she giggled lightly, rubbing her belly. “They are going to be the most spoiled children.”

At that, he laughed. “I can’t say you’re wrong. I don’t think I will be able to say ‘no’ to them at all.”

“Azriel, you can’t even tell me no,” she deadpanned.

“It’s just not in my vocabulary when it comes to you.”

Elain shook her head, eyes rolling as she twisted back in her seat to face forward again. She could see the restaurant down the street where they were meeting their siblings for lunch to tell them the news. “Well, I’m not going to take on the mean parent role just because you can’t say no.” She fiddled with her purse, sliding the image back inside. “We may need to find an alternative—” Screeching tires caught her attention and then she screamed, “Azriel! Watch out!”

The car lurched, sending her head sideways to slam against the side window. The last thing she heard was shattering glass as another car collided with them before everything went dark.

~~~~~

Azriel’s eyes blinked open, ears ringing loud enough to make him wince. His body ached across his chest and waist from the seat belt and as he shifted himself, he could tell nothing was seriously injured. Thankfully. He looked over at his wife, fear locking his heart in a deadly force. “Elain,” he murmured, voice hoarse.

Her head lay against the back of the seat, lulled to the side. She had a gash on her forehead, blood dribbling down her temple, and most of her right arm was scratched up from the shattered glass.

He tried to unbuckle his belt, but the damn thing was stuck. Pulling the knife Ruhn had gotten him from his pocket, he cut the fabric, releasing him, then reached over and did the same to Elain’s belt. A scarred hand slid to her cheek, cupping it gently, and then moved down to her throat, searching for his worst nightmare.

The relief he felt when her heartbeat pattered against his fingertips was unlike anything he’d ever experienced. “Elain,” he tried again, moving his palm back to her face. “Elain, sweetheart, open your eyes for me.” His tone took on a desperate sound as he willed her to wake.

Movement caught his eye, the sound of tires crunching on glass flooded him and he looked out the window to see the car that hit them, pulling back and fleeing. “Motherfucker,” he cursed, realizing that this was an intended accident. He had managed to jerk the wheel so Elain didn’t take the brunt of the impact, but it still slammed into the back door, shattering all the windows on her side.

A burning rage built in his gut, one that could not—would not—be stifled without blood. Whoever ordered this hit…

They were as good as dead.

Azriel refocused on his wife, fingers sweeping over her skin. He shoved that wrath building inside of him down until it was a flickering ember, something for him to let rage once he knew she was okay. “Elain, come on. Open your eyes for me.” He gently tapped her cheek, trying to get her to look at him. “Please, love. I need you to open your eyes. Elain.”

A groan passed through her lips, sending tears of relief cascading over his cheeks as her eyelids began fluttering.

“El, baby,” he cried, swooping his thumb across her smooth skin. He collected the soft sounds coming from her parted lips like precious gems, thanking every god for each one.

“Az.” Her voice cracked on his name. “What happened?” she asked, still coming into consciousness.

He shuffled closer, leaning over the center console to kiss her temple with a gentleness he reserved only for her. “We were in an accident, love. I need you to stay still until help gets here.” He felt her pulse kick up under his palm.

Elain’s breathing turned short. “Azriel…” her voice shook in fear. “Az, the babies.”

His heart wrenched, hoping and praying that everything was all right. After all that they had been through, he didn’t think he could handle the world taking something else away from her. From them. But despite his fear, he remained calm, knowing she needed to as well. “Everything is going to be okay,” he promised. “I hear the sirens, love. Help is almost here.”

The words didn’t seem to abate her as she continued to shake. “Please,” she cried, tears gathering at the corner of her eyes and dribbling down her cheeks. “Check if I’m bleeding.”

Azriel knew she needed to know—would not breathe steadily until she did. He placed his hand on the inside of her thigh, sliding up until he reached her panties. Feeling her for any sort of wetness. Any stickiness that would confirm to him there was blood.

She was dry.

There weren’t words to describe how thankful he felt for that confirmation. “No blood,” he told her, pulling his hand out from underneath her dress to show her his clean fingers.

Elain released a sob, her tense body relaxing slightly.

He shushed her, kissing her temple again. “You’re okay,” he murmured, wanting to do everything in his power to reassure her. “Everything is going to be okay.”

Two firetrucks pulling up snagged his attention, as he continued to stroke her cheek soothingly.

“Sir, are you both okay?” one of the responders asked as he approached his side of the car.

He glanced at the man. “We’re conscious but she needs to be looked at.”

The guy rapped his knuckles on the top of the car. “We’ll get you out in a second—”

“Her first,” he told him in a tone that brooked no room for argument.

Another firefighter moved towards his wife’s window. “Ma’am, can you tell me your name?” she asked.

“Elain,” his wife answered.

“Are you in any pain?”

“My head hurts a bit.” Those doe eyes looked at the other woman. “I’m pregnant.”

She turned her head and yelled, “Get me the jaws!” Looking back at Elain, she reached in and wrapped a C-collar around her neck. “How far along are you?”

“Fifteen weeks.”

A nod. “All right, Elain. We’ll have you out in a jiffy and get you over to the hospital to have your baby checked out.”

Neither of them bothered to correct her on the number of babies. It wasn’t relevant, only that they needed to get her out. Once the door was opened, they began moving her onto a backboard. Azriel wrenched the driver’s side open, wanting to get to her as quickly as possible.

“Sir! You need to be checked by the paramedic,” somebody called out but he ignored them, rounding the vehicle to where Elain was being placed on a stretcher. Just before he reached her, another voice called his name—one he couldn’t ignore. He turned, finding Cassian running over to him, flashing a badge to one of the firefighters to get past him. Rhys, Feyre, and Nesta stood just beyond the scene at their cars, all watching his wife being checked out.

“What the hell happened?” Cassian demanded, eyes flitting over to where Elain was being hauled towards an ambulance.

“Hit and run. Fucker took off after T-boning us,” he snarled, tone murderous. They would not get away with this. Not with his pregnant wife in the car with him. Az glanced up and saw the street cameras, angled just right to have caught the entire accident. “Cash, get me the film from that camera,” he indicated with a nod of his head before swiveling on his feet and prowling toward his wife.

Cassian kept stride with him, took in the responders on the scene, and lowered his voice to not be overheard. “Az, the police will investigate. Just let them do their job.”

Azriel whirled on his brother. “You either get me that tape, Cassian, or I’ll get it my way. Either option, I will find out who did this to her.” There was no arguing when he stepped into this role. This wasn’t a brother asking for a favor. This was the head of the Velaris Mob Boss demanding it.

His voice turned deadly, taking on the dangerous threat he used to get what he wanted.

When it looked like his brother was about to argue, the female firefighter shouted, “Victim is fifteen weeks pregnant. She needs to be checked out by a doctor.”

Elain called Az’s name and he turned, striding towards her but not before he caught how Cassian’s face paled. Or the shocked looks from their siblings. Well, that’s one way to find out, he thought to himself as he reached his wife’s side and took her hand.

She clutched his fingers, her face still scrunched with worry. He gave her a reassuring squeeze, placing a kiss on her forehead before they loaded her into the back of the ambulance. Az climbed in after, sitting down on the bench and gripping her hand once more. He glanced back out the door and found Cassian standing there.

“I’ll get you that tape,” he said quietly; fierce determination blazed in his hazel eyes to help his brother wreak havoc over the person who went after his pregnant wife. Only Cassian could understand the fear of something like this, having already gone through a pregnancy with Nesta. Without another word, he shut the doors to the ambulance.

Elain looked up at him, his name falling from her lips. He brushed a thumb over her forehead. “Everything is going to be fine, love. Just try to relax.” It was empty words, they knew that. Knew neither of them would settle until they heard both of those heartbeats on a monitor.

He just hoped he was holding it together enough for her until they could confirm she was still pregnant.

And may God have mercy on the fucker who caused this, if she wasn’t.

~~~

They ushered Elain into a private room, hooking her up to a fetal monitor. The doctor moved quickly, shoving her dress up to reveal her bare stomach while a nurse covered her hips with a blanket.

She flinched slightly when the cold gel was applied to her skin and Azriel brought her fingers to his lips, kissing her across the backside of her knuckles.

It was like the world held its breath as they searched for those two heartbeats.

“Baby number one looks good,” the doctor said, clicking a button and sending the hummingbird’s wing pattern of a heartbeat into the room.

Elain squeezed his hand, a soft sound passing between her lips in relief.  

The wand moved on her belly, searching for their other little one. “And, there they are. Hiding behind their sibling.”

When the second heartbeat reached their ears, Elain twisted, sobbing into Az’s chest with utter joy. He wasn’t very far behind her, letting tears of relief slip from his eyes as he cradled her against his torso. His hand rubbed her shoulder, lips pressing to the crown of her head, offering comfort to her through his presence and touch.

The doctor cleaned her off, smiling at the two of them. “Everything looks good on the monitor,” she started after giving them a moment. “We’ll keep you here for another hour or so just to be safe before we discharge you. If you have any bleeding in the next few days, come in right away.”

Elain seemed unable to answer, so he did it for her. “We will, thank you, doctor.”

“There also appears to be a group of people waiting for you guys in the lobby. Would you like me to send them in or give them a message?”

He crouched, putting himself at her eye level, wanting Elain to make the decision. Az cupped her cheek, thumb brushing away the tears under her eyes. “Love, do you want to see the family now?” he asked, voice low.

She sniffed, eyes still flooded with silver. The subtle shake of her head told him she wasn’t quite ready for the company yet.

Azriel rose, perching himself on the edge of her bed, and tucked her back into his chest. “Can you tell them that we’re okay, and I’ll come to get them when we’re ready for visitors?”

“Of course. Page the nurse if you need anything.” Without another word, she slipped from the room, the door clicking shut behind her.

Elain fisted his shirt, taking in his cedar and mist scent deep into her lungs. He gave her whatever time she needed, letting her get herself together. “I was so scared,” she whispered, burying her face further into his embrace.

Azriel was grateful that she seemed to find comfort in him, in his touch, his scent. He held her tighter against him, murmuring, “Me too.”

She held onto him for a few more precious moments before pulling back to look up at his face. “I didn’t see the other car when they pulled me out.” Her brows furrowed as she tried to put the pieces together. “Were we in a hit and run?”

“Yes,” he said, brushing his thumb back and forth over her cheek.

Her eyes flicked between his. “Do you think we were targeted?”

He wouldn’t lie to her—refused to, but also didn’t want her to be even more frightened than she already was. “I do.” Az saw that kid look directly at him, his eyes widening in understanding that he was, in fact, not dead, before taking off from the scene. He didn’t recognize him, but if he had to place a bet, he’d say it was one of Frankie’s lower levels who crossed to Elias’s side.

Az didn’t think either of his brothers would call a hit like that. Middle of the day, busy street. It wasn’t their style. But Elias was careless, greedy, and a poor decision-maker. He sighed, brushing his lips to her forehead. “The kid looked me dead in the eye before leaving. He was scared that I was still alive.”

“How old do you think he was?” Elain asked.

“I’d say we have at least a decade on him. Seventeen, maybe eighteen.”

“So, just a kid then.”

He cocked his head to the side. “You say that like it’s excusable.”

She shook her head. “I’m not excusing what he did, but we both know how young kids are trapped into joining those gangs. Through manipulation and fear. There’s a reason you won’t allow anyone that young to be brought in, Az, and you know it. I don’t think I’m going out on a limb to question if it was his idea or he was put up to it.”

His lips quirked up as she spoke like a true Mob queen. “If you had to guess who would put him up to it—”

“Elias, no doubt. We both know he’s been itching to strike at us since he showed up at the hospital. And you said he was trying to recruit kids from Frankie. Perhaps he offered this kid a way out from under Illyrian rule.”

“There is only one way out from Frankie’s Mob,” he told her, letting the words hang heavily between them.

Elain let out a deep breath. “I know. Either way, he’s dead. Elias is likely to kill him for failing, or Frankie and Nick will for attempting to leave.”

It floored him to just how similar her train of thought was to his. She observed and listened and picked up on every single thread laid down. Understood all of the connections and bloodshed as if she’d been a part of it her whole life. He couldn’t say that the revelation was thrilling, but it also made his chest ache. Az never wanted her to be so in tune with his world. Didn’t want her to have to think about the worst-case scenarios and determine ways around them. But here she was, doing just that and not shying away from it.

To think he couldn’t love her any more than he already did.

“I have to agree with your assessment. Elias will not get away with this; with what he’s done to you.”

She didn’t balk at the threat in his tone, simply took his hand in hers and squeezed. “Despite what he’s done, is going after him the best idea? Things could escalate.”

“We can’t let this go without repercussions, love. Others will hear about this and wait to see how I respond. If it’s not a show of force, they’ll think I’ve gone lax and more will come. I need to be aggressive with my actions.”

It looked like she wanted to argue some more, but decided against it, bringing his hand up to her mouth to kiss his scars. “Do you want to go get the others now? I’m ready to see them.”

He smiled down at her, cupping her cheek one more time. “I’ll be right back.” Az pressed his lips to her forehead before he slipped from the room, knowing that that conversation was far from over. But he’d let it go for now. She had been through enough today without him pushing her on it. But this was one thing he would not, could not budge on. Not if he didn’t want to keep her safe. Especially now with their growing family.

Azriel wasn’t even to the edge of the lobby when Nesta shot out of her chair.

“Is she all right?” his sister asked, face drawn with worry.

His eyes glanced to Cassian behind her, cradling a sleeping Sutton in his large arm, Feyre and Rhys next to him. “She’s fine,” he told them, sensing their relief. “They want to keep her here another hour or so, just to be safe, but you guys are welcome to come back with me if you’d like.”

“Does she want company?” Feyre asked, edging to her eldest sister’s side. “We don’t want to intrude—”

“She asked for you all. No intrusion,” Az interrupted her.

Cassian swallowed, his eyes looking down at the small thing in the crook of his elbow. “You know we all heard the firefighter…is the baby okay?”

He had a feeling one of them would ask, but he wanted to make sure Elain was present for it. So, he said instead, “Everyone is fine. We can talk more in her room.” Turning on his heel, he headed back toward Elain’s private room, knowing they’d follow him closely.

Opening the door, he caught Elain looking intently out the window, seemingly oblivious to the world around her. “Love,” he called out to her, making her snap out of her reverie and turn to face him. “Our siblings are here.”

Her smile lit up his entire chest, despite the current circumstances. Gods, she was radiant when she smiled at him like that.

He held the door open, letting their family shuffle in. Nesta and Feyre made a beeline right to either side of her, gripping her in a firm hug.

“Are you all right?” Nesta asked again, cupping her cheeks in her palms.

Elain laughed slightly. “Yes, I’m fine.” Her eyes landed on his at the foot of her bed and he nodded at her, answering her silent question. One small hand swept down over the slight swell of her belly. “We’re all fine,” she added, a bit more shyly.

“I can’t believe you two are pregnant already,” Rhys stated, resting a palm on her lower leg.

Az laughed. “Strong swimmers,” he boasted.

“Asshole,” Cassian muttered. It wasn’t a secret that he and Nesta had struggled a bit to get pregnant. His wife was, apparently, just incredibly fertile.

Elain just shook her head, eyes rolling at the exchange.

“How far along are you?” Feyre asked, interrupting what she knew was going to be another ridiculous argument.

“Fifteen weeks. Or just over,” she answered.

Nesta blinked in surprise. “Do you know what you’re having?”

Her lips quirked up in the corner as she eyed him. “A boy.”

Their family erupted into congratulatory shouts for them both, grabbing them into hugs. Az waited until they quieted down before announcing, “And a girl.”

All four heads swiveled to him.

Silence descended upon their family for a few tense moments before Rhys finally demanded, “Explain!”

“We’re having a boy and a girl.”

He could see the lightbulbs going off above their heads. It was rather humorous to watch them connect the dots.

“You’re having twins?” Cassian breathed, eyes wide as saucers.

Elain chuckled at their expense. “Yes, my husband infested me with his superseed for two babies.”

Azriel barked out a laugh. “You’re one to talk miss fertile as fuck.”

Their family erupted into a fit of hysterics at the exchange and that brought the largest smile to his face. Elain caught his grin, offering him one of her own. Fuck, he loved her so damn much and he couldn’t wait to have his two little ones welcomed into such a loving family.

He still had to handle Elias, still needed to confirm who else was involved in the hit on them, but he pushed that aside and focused on this moment with his pregnant wife and their siblings. Az would get his revenge…just not today.

~~~~~

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[squirrelwithatophat]

Anders and the Blooming Rose

It’s a fairly minor part of his character, but I find it hilarious that Anders, "The Healer” of Darktown, really does not like the local brothel.  If you take him with you while purchasing “services” from Madame Lusine, you get this reaction...

“You’re not this desperate, I hope.  I treat a lot of these customers in my clinic.”

Then if you ignore the warning and do it anyways (you know, because Hawke)…

Anders: rivalry +5

It’s not a moral condemnation, a complaint about wasting time (à la Beth or Carver), or a vague expression of disgust (of the sort Fenris or Merrill reply with) — Anders, the closest in-universe equivalent to a doctor, is warning the player-character away from soliciting prostitutes on health grounds.

One interesting aspect of Dragon Age II is that it contains many more specific references to disease — which makes sense, given the medieval urban setting, where the top causes of mortality would realistically be infectious disease.  Gamlen explicitly refers to his parents dying of “cholera,” a highly lethal (even today, untreated cholera has a case fatality rate of up to 50%) water-borne illness, and the water supply in Lowtown is described as dangerously contaminated (Hawke can refuse to drink it “even on a dare,” Merrill refers to something “twitching” in the water even after boiling it).  A random NPC asking Lirene about “The Healer” complains, “I can't get my brother off the boat. The grippe's [i.e., the flu] got him bad.” Then there are the multiple references to unspecified STIs, all of which come from (or at least are associated with) Anders.

There’s an amusing line from Anders upon entering the Blooming Rose for the first time (usually but not necessarily during Enemies Among Us in Act 1):

“If someone tries to hire me again, I’m leaving.”

Now, some fans seem to read this as a claim that the Blooming Rose has tried to hire him as a sex worker, but I believe there’s a more plausible interpretation here. (Frankly, I have difficulty imagining that a brothel would be obsessed to the point of harassment with recruiting as their newest rent boy a man in his mid-30’s — and one who, need I remind you, lives in a mine shaft connected to a sewer and notorious for its toxic fumes, dumping of rotting corpses, and disease outbreaks. And no offense to any Andersmancer reading this, but is he really that good-looking?).

Most likely, the brothel is looking to hire an in-house physician (or Thedosian equivalent). Anders is referred to curing STIs and providing other reproductive care. In introducing him, Lirene says, “He's closed their wounds, delivered their children.” One of patients in her shop can be heard crying out, “My mother's in labor! The baby's come early. Can anyone help her?” To which Lirene replies, “I'll send word to the healer.” (Anders may have been delivering babies back in the Circle as well, considering that in MoTA, he says, “At the Circle, any accidental babies are taken away before the mother even sees them.” This could, however, simply be common knowledge among Circle mages). It’s also implied by Wynne that Circle mages practice contraception: “Such births [in the Circle] are seldom, as there are ways to prevent it, but it does happen.” Moreover, Anders appears to be the only person in Kirkwall willing and able to provide these medical services. There are references to useless quacks (e.g., “some purveyor of hensbane and leeches”), but it’s acknowledged in-universe that the only effective healing comes from mages. In DAI, the Inquisitor can express surprise at the presence of a “mundane” (non-mage) surgeon, who goes on to insist that such non-magical methods will be developed in the future, all of which further reinforces the (in-universe) social/cultural equation of healer as mage. Mage healers only appear to be let out of the Circle on rare occasions to treat members of the nobility, but ordinary people don’t receive such consideration. Even the viscount’s seneschal has to seek out Anders for help. In DAI, Cullen casually moons the idea of “healers’ clinics with templar support” (among other potential “opportunities to work outside the Circle”) as a totally novel solution to mage “resentment” over confinement. The Chantry thus far wasn’t willing to release mages to treat sick commoners even with phylacteries to deter escapes and Templar overseers breathing down their necks the entire time; in fact, they were rather reluctant to let out even a handful of senior mages to fight alongside the king against the Blight, something which threatened everyone’s lives fairly equally (and even then couldn’t resist the temptation to make the mages feel as unwelcome as possible). “The Healer of Darktown” was well-known to illicitly (that is, in defiance of Chantry restrictions) provide health care for free to the masses, and this service not surprisingly had earned him quite the number of admirers and defenders. Lirene resists being threatened for information about him by saying, “Any Fereldan in the city would lay down his life for the healer, after what he's done for us,” and a mob of Ferelden refugees even prepare to attack the heavily-armed party out of fear that the latter might harm him or report him to the Templars.  His Act 2 Codex likewise reads: “When not with the Champion, he spends his time among the Fereldan refugees in Darktown, healing their ills and counting on their loyalty to protect him from curious templars.” Should it be a surprise then that a private business might be interested in his skills, especially when disease is threatening their bottom line and injuring customers?  

In the game, we actually see two frequent patrons of the Blooming Rose end up in Anders’s clinic for treatment.

Dissent (Act 2), if Isabela has been left behind:

Anders: ...don't come running to me next time you pick up one of these diseases.

Isabela: Isn't that the point of magic?

Hawke: I don't want to know.

Dissent (Act 2), if Isabela is in the party:

Seneschal Bran: And that will, ah, stop the itch?

Anders: Yes. Though I would stay away from women you meet in the port. Pirates tend to... dock in unsavory places.

Isabela: I heard that!

Anders: Just use the salve if it comes back.

This is probably also what Isabela is referring to in the opening to Speak to Fenris (Act 2):

Isabela: So the seneschal's tax collector won't be coming around again, like you asked. Funny story.

Fenris: I'll pass, but thank you for the help.

Isabela: Spoilsport.

Seneschal Bran appears to be a regular with a particular fondness for Serendipity, a drag queen (or transfemme?) and one of the highest-paid workers at the Blooming Rose, whose gender nonconformity is generally Played for Laughs.  Bran can be seen on a “date” with her at Duke Prosper’s party during Mark of the Assassin, and Serendipity can later be heard commenting, “I haven't seen the seneschal much lately. Don't tell me the man's gone religious” (to which someone responds, “No, he just keeps terrible hours now”).

Isabela, of course, talks about sex and her enjoyment of brothels (including the Blooming Rose) quite frequently.  In Dragon Age Origins, we meet her dueling two men at The Pearl (Denerim’s main brothel), and she can (in)famously be talked into a threesome or foursome with the Warden and their LI, although in that game it was unclear whether she was hiring prostitutes or simply ended up there in the course of searching for dueling partners (given that the building had been occupied by mercenaries, and one of the optional quests in Denerim is to clear The Pearl of disruptive mercenaries on behalf of the city guard) or following/checking on her crewmen. In DA2, it is confirmed that she was going to The Pearl for sex, and Anders remarks, “You used to really like that girl with the griffon tattoos, right?” to which Isabela replies with the name “The Lay Warden.”

(For now, I’ll just ignore the unfortunate implications of Bioware depicting a promiscuous black woman repeatedly contracting STIs and unrepentantly spreading them to white men for blackmail purposes.  But yeah, yikes).  

Historically, the emergence of STIs as a major social problem has been associated with urbanization and military mobilizations — basically, situations in which large numbers of individuals had opportunities for unprotected sex, especially with multiple partners, away from the usual social control mechanisms such as cockblocking parents (and virtually all sex was unprotected until latex condoms began to be mass-produced in the 1920s-30s). Without the safety measures we have in place in licensed brothels today (e.g., condom requirements, regular STI testing), brothels and red light districts were superspreader bonanzas, and perhaps unsurprisingly, medical professionals tended to take a rather dim view of them, to put it mildly. Modern readers often historical interpret opposition to brothels and camp followers (in the military) on the part of medical and public health authorities as expressions of prudery, religious conservatism, and/or misogyny, and to be frank, they very often were. Yet at the same time, in the pre-condom and pre-antibiotic era, STIs represented a major public health burden and cause of disability, disfigurement, infertility, and premature death, and there few practical measures beyond simply urging everyone to keep their pants on (which worked about as well as one might expect).

Circling back to Anders, it's notable that he takes a much more negative view of sex in the second game than in Awakening, during which he seemed eager to hump anything that moved. This could at least in part reflect the influence of Justice, who seems to regard anything other than fighting for justice and engaging in public service to be "selfish" and even slothful (as in demon-y sloth). Or simple aging and maturity. Or, on a meta level, it could be an odd re-characterization due to the change in writer. But I like to think that his newfound discomfort with no-strings-attached boning is an unfortunate side effect of being a charity doctor working into the late hours to accommodate an endless stream of dick wart patients. It's already a shame that his clinic and service for the poor is relegated to such a background element, especially given the role such work would realistically play in forming a person's character. In terms of character development, it would have been interesting to explore how his work in the clinic could itself had a radicalizing effect — after all, it would bring him face-to-face with the tragic consequences of Chantry policy on mundanes (rather than just mages) as well as demonstrate magic’s contribution to the greater good on a daily basis. But this angle unfortunately never comes up in-universe.

TL;DR What I'm actually saying is that the real tragedy of Anders's character arc is the profound decrease in sluttiness between the two games.

#dragon age #dragon age 2 #dragon age meta #anders #anders* #anders dragon age #da meta #dragon age ii #da2 #dragon age awakening #justice #spirit of justice #the blooming rose #isabela #Isabela dragon age #isabela rivaini #seneschal bran #serendipity #fenris #madame lusine #sti #std #disease #history of disease #100 #200 #300

[asirensrambles]

3 times someone read to Fenris + 1 time he did the same

Flufftober Day 5: Fenris/female Hawke x + 1 (can be a classic "5+1 things" [or any number you want] creation or literally a plus one for an event or really anything else you can think of) I could only come up with 3 scenarios, so that's what I went with!

@flufftober

1.

Fenris' ears burned, and he wanted nothing more than to bolt. However, that would have been rude, and Hawke had seemed so genuinely thrilled to present him with the book. Gathering his courage, Fenris risked looking up to meet her eyes. The pity, scorn, or disgust he was expecting to see was nowhere to be found. Instead, she looked thoughtful more than anything.

"Well, I guess we'll just have to teach you then. I could read the first chapter aloud, see if you like it?" Dumbstruck, Fenris could do nothing more than nod. He managed to settle into one of the seats in front of the fireplace as Hawke began the story.

2.

Although the reading lessons with Hawke were going well, Fenris still couldn't manage much more than children's stories. Reading over a job contract? Forget it. Unfortunately, Hawke was out at Sundermount helping Merrill with Maker knows what. It was with reluctant steps and near dragging feet that Fenris made his way into Aveline's office. As he entered, the Captain of the Guard looked up. Upon seeing Fenris, Aveline tilted her head ever so slightly in confusion. Usually, the elf avoided the city guard like the plague.

"I need a favor," Fenris blurted out. Being surrounded by so many armed enforcers had him on edge.

Aveline's eyebrows nearly shot off her face, but she quickly schooled her expression to a more neutral one. "I'll help if I can. What do you need."

Fenris crossed the room and shoved the contract onto the desk. Unable to meet her eyes, he glared at it, as though the document had personally offended him.

"This is a contract for a job I was approached for. I was wondering if...if there's any reason I shouldn't sign it."

The elf's inability to read was something that, while the group knew, was never really spoken of directly. Although Fenris couldn't see it, Aveline's expression softened in understanding.

"I'd be happy to look over it, see if they snuck anything in there that shouldn't be."

"........thank you."

3.

The Hanged Man was busier than normal this particular Friday. After being jostled one too many times, Fenris fled to Varric's quarters upstairs. Almost immediately, he felt himself relax as the impending possiblility of pain flaring across his skin faded away in the open space. To his surprise, Varric was actually in his quarters. While that in and of itself wasn't strange, it was strange on a Friday night. Curious as to what would have the usually social dwarf squirreled away from everyone, Fenris padded over.

"What are you doing?"

Varric nearly jumped out of his seat. "Maker's breath, Fenris! I'm gonna have to put a bell on you."

Fenris smirked. "You can try."

The dwarf just shook his head, before turning back to the pile of papers in front of him. "I'm trying to catch up on some business correspondence, but for some unfathomable reason, one of my partners decided to use Tevene." Varric held up the letter for Fenris to see.

While Hawke's lessons were paying off, trying to match the letters for Andrastian sounds with their Tevene counterparts sent his brain short-circuiting. "I never learned to read Tevene."

Varric squinted at him. "It's the same alphabet, I should be able to read it to you, and you can translate for me?"

Fenris shrugged. It wasn't like he had anything better to do with his night. "Sure."

+ 1.

Although it felt foolish, Anders assured him it would help. Apparently, there was a good chance Hawke could still hear him, even as she lay unconscious, recovering from the fight with the Arishok. Fenris reading to her would let her know she wasn't alone, give her mind something to focus on and claw it's way back to. While he was skeptical, Anders was obnoxiously knowledgeable about healing and the practice of medicine, so if he said it would help, Fenris was willing to try. So he picked up the book from the nightstand, opened it to the bookmark, and began to read. It was slow, sometimes stumbling going, but Fenris pressed on. A few days later, when a trembling hand brushed against his own, he knew it had been worth it.

#fenris x hawke #fenris x femhawke #flufftober2023 #day 5 #dragon age 2 #my writing #fenris

[calicobigamy]

Romancing Anders in DA2 at the moment and boy, he is basically a walking red flag...

There’s someone for everyone, but wowie. Killed Anders when I didn’t romance him, might do it again while romancing him.

Red Flags

Let himself be joined with Justice in the first place. Now if another character who was always an apostate, like Morrigan, did this I would not be bothered. Go do that funky magic. But someone who was trained in the Circle, knew about the Harrowing? Seems sussy to me... 👀

Says that he is “obsessed” with Hawke before he tells them he loves them.

Writes a manifesto (always a HUGE red flag)

Looks like he doesn’t wash his hands and he's a healer.

Says the most disgusting awful things to Fenris, ex. “If you didn’t like slavery, maybe you should’ve just offed yourself” WHO SAYS THAT TO ANYONE???

Always talking about politics, even when Hawke is trying to flirt with him.

The self deprecating remarks about how Hawke could still love him all the time. Why shouldn't Hawke love him, why is he self sabotaging? Just be cute and flirty for once GOD. Didn’t know I was reaching for the stars.

Did blood magic in Awakening but sh!ts on Merrill in DA2 while walking around as a textbook example of an abomination. Cognitive dissonance!

Dyes his clothes black in your bathtub? Whoa dude, he probably didn’t even clean it up.

Involves Hawke in terrorist plots without knowledge or consent.

KISSING? There was one. It’s obvious Hawke and Anders don’t have the same love language, HAWKE GET OUT!

Anders has no friends of his own, only Hawke’s friends

Does he wash his hair?? I have doubts...

Not even done with the game. Good for you Anders girlies, but I don’t get it. Looking forward to romancing Fenris again. I understand that Anders is a character who is supposed to be corrupted by Justice as he is turned to Vengeance, but he is so completely unlikable from the start that I can’t tell the difference. You shouldn’t have to play the DLC to understand Anders’ character arc.

#da2 #dragonage #anders dragon age #red flags #anti anders tw

[dynamite124]

Would Tal get along with the other modded followers? (Sorry if this was asked already, feel free to ignore if so!)

Honestly I can see some like Kaiden or Auri seeing him and wanting to leave him but the dragonborn is WAY too nice to leave him in that state. I feel like him and Lucien MIGHT get along at least in terms of knowledge (geeks geeking out lol)

I think out of the plethora of other modded followers, Taliesin may not be making any new friends anytime fast. XD

Kaidan, Auri, Gore - Taliesin's personality and past with the Thalmor (while still wearing their robes), he's probably going to be on their 'shit-list' for a while.

Taliesin would also NOT like Gore's name...at all. He may try to enforce a "less disgusting" name onto him...like ,"Fenris. You look like a Fenris to me". Though I can see Gore pulling a reverse Uno card and trying to change Taliesin's name in return.

He might find some common ground with Auri, due to not being able to return home himself and leaving behind his youngers sisters.

****

Hoth, Nebarra - Up in the air. I can see Nebarra and Taliesin having a sass off at some point. Hoth is another story, since he doesn't talk much and is a little gruff, I can't pinpoint how Taliesin would feel about him.

Hoth: When you live as long as I have. You pick up on a thing of two.

Taliesin: ...I'm older than you.

****

Khash the Argonian - Would probably start out wanting to ship her off to the Riften orphanage due to her age and then constantly wanting to wash her mouth out with soap due to her "colorful language". However, she has spunk and he appreciates that. Might adopt her.

Caryalind Thallery - The Prince of the Altmeri Dominion! At first impressions, things could be awkward between these two. Taliesin might find Caryalind's goal to be ridiculous and a wasted effort, but he'd find it a welcomed change for the Altmer. And, of course, he'd still fall into old habits around the prince, namely appointing himself as Caryalind's Bodyguard. XD

****

Rumarin - This Altmer is very self-deprecating, and that's suspicious. He's keeping an eye on Rumarin.

Lucien, Remeil - These two might be the easiest ones for Taliesin to get along with. He'd appreciate traveling with highly educated people like himself. Remiel's fascination with Dwemer technology might confuse him, but hey, she has a cat! And so does Lucien! Taliesin would adore Lucien's personality and someone cultured and refine to travel with!

****

Inigo - Would immediately want to bathe the moment he hears about his fleas.

#Skyrim #Skyrim custom followers #Skyrim Taliesin #Taliesin #Auri #Song of the green #Skyrim Auri #Kaidan #Kaidan 2 #Skyrim Kaidan #Gore #Skyrim Gore #Inigo the brave #Skyrim Inigo #Inigo #lucien flavius #Lucien #Skyrim Lucien #khash the argonian #Skyrim Khash #Taliesin Gore #Taliesin Auri #Taliesin Kaidan #Taliesin Caryalind #caryalind thallery #Remeil #Nebarra #Nebarra Taliesin #Taliesin Remeil #Taliesin Lucien

[transfenris-truther]

Okay, so everyone talks about how it's out of character for Anders to approve when Hawke essentially sells Fenris back to Danarius. But I don't think we talk enough about how every companion is out of character in that scene.

Isabela and Varric react with disgust (Varric's expressed via sarcasm), as if Hawke is being very rude and not LITERALLY SELLING THEIR CLOSE FRIEND. Considering a part of Isabela’s backstory is nearly dying to free a group of slaves, and Fenris could literally be her boyfriend at this stage in the game, it's astonishing to me that you don't lose her as a companion altogether over this.

Aveline just says "unbelievable" as if Hawke isn't breaking a major law in her full view. She says more critical things about Hawke's mercenary work than she does him literally selling a person. Even if you're not a fan of Aveline, this is demonstrably the type of thing she'd throw hands over.

Anders, as previously discussed in a thousand other posts would not react like this. Even if you're an Anders hater, you have to acknowledge that this is a situation where Justice would become involved. This has been discussed to death, but as much conflict as he and Fenris have, this is a level of betrayal and underhandedness that's not demonstrated anywhere else.

Merrill and Sebastian react somewhat like you'd expect. Merrill is extremely distressed and upset, she literally shouts "No!" But tbh, knowing her character and the way that she has been entirely comfortable going against the grain in the past, it's remarkable she doesn't actually step in. Perhaps if you play a REALLY aggressive Hawke who bullies Merrill, I could understand this being the extent of her reaction. But with any other characterization, her objection is so much less than what you'd expect of her.

Same for Sebastian. He says "We can't abandon our friend in his hour of need," and then proceeds to do literally nothing while a close friend of his is betrayed and sold. Sebastian is NOT the kind of guy who would just stand there and watch while this happens in front of him. He and Fenris are close, and unless you're romancing him, he has very little reason to stay with the Kirkwall Crew if Fenris is gone and the group doesn't represent his values.

I think Bioware wanted to have this option in the game for whatever reason, but they didn't realize they had written characters for whom this was a major deal breaker. They wrote scenes with the same moral gravitas as the ones from Origins, but they refused to give you scenes of confrontation with those you'd hurt, or give companions a trigger to leave your party if your choices were too abhorrent to them.

The scene sucks. It's not that Anders is written out of character (which he is). It's that everyone but Fenris and Hawke HAVE to act out of character in order to maintain the game's balance and keep characters in your party when they should be leaving it. As a result, you get a scene where you can sell Bela's boyfriend and Sebastian's best friend into slavery and they still come to your parties and never say anything about it again.

#fenris #Bioware critical #Slavery mention #da2 #dragon age #hawke #Isabela #Anders #Merrill #Sebastian #Aveline #Varric

[dragonagecompanions]

As someone who's been following for ages, you deserve more blog interaction, so what about da2 companions reacting to a hawke who was knowingly on-board with the destruction of the chantry?

Isabella: This whole thing is way outside her pay grade,

and at the end of the day Hawke's involvement level has little to do with her emotions or acceptance. Kirkwall is now a war zone, and the safest place is Not Here. Hawke is welcome to join her, or not, but either way the captain is leaving with the tide.

Bethany: In truth Hawke's sister, either circle mage or warden, is hardly surprised. In Ferelden, when their family was still whole, Malcom lived with the fear that one day he would be drug away from all he had built and trapped in the circle. In Kirkwall his daughter suffered the same fear. It makes it easy to understand her sibling's decision, if no less easy to accept.

But the Hawke's stick together, and even if she is horrified and frightened of the future Bethany is staying with her family.

Carver: Is anyone really surprised that the almighty Hawke would finally take things into their own hands?

Its not that Carver has no care for his sibling, not really, but over the years over over protection and standing in the shadows Carver is the least surprised that the scion of their family is willing to go to extremes. As a Warden, more distant from the issues and grown used to the apolitical nature of the order, he is disgusted and horrified. As a templar...

Well, something was always going to give. He can neither condemn nor condone.

Aveline: A decade of friendship, of trust and respect and family, go up as quickly as the Chantry. She, who has always stood for order and justice and the understanding that there must be both compassion and discipline in a society, cannot stomach the knowledge. Its unthinkable that her friend would be a party to this kind of...wanton destruction.

Because of their friendship, she will let them live. But while she breathes they will never be welcome in Kirkwall again.

Fenris: What is left to say? For all he admires Hawke and is grateful for their assistance in the past, they have thrown their lot in with the abomination. Fenris has seen enough of Tevinter to know what comes next. They will find no more friend in him.

Anders: It was like a miracle in itself, when he finally tells Hawke and they not only agree but want to help. Carrying this burden alone for so long has been hellish, but a problem shared is a problem halved. Their support keeps Justice banked to an extent, to know that another is willing to take the steps necessary to bring about true unity.

And in the fall out, it is good to not be alone.

Varric: Well....shit.

Very little can shake Kirkwall's resident author from a chosen course, and in truth even this cannot truly demolish his friendship with the champion, but....it's shaken. Things were bad, yes, and Meredith was insane, but now his city is up in flames and on a knife edge from being taken by Starkhaven or in a divine invasion. All he has worked for is literally up in smoke and...

Shit. They need to run, until they can figure out what to do next. And figure out how he can learn to look them in the eyes again and trust what he sees.

Merill: If Hawke refused to let her destroy the mirror, the hypocrisy burns in her. Her eluvian was so dangerous that she can't even experiment, but they are allowed to destroy the Shem's chantry? Where is the justice in that?!

But if pursued to the terrible end, the blood mage knows what it is to be caught in a web from which there is no escape but destruction. She can hardly judge what she herself has wrought, and will stand with her friend no matter the consequences of their actions.

Sebastian: He attacks. There is no mercy, not even if they are in love, for what they have done. So many of the faithful were needlessly slaughtered, and even if he will fall as well the prince of Starkhaven will have their vengeance in blood.

Mod Fereldone

#dragon age 2 #merrill #varric tethras #aveline #isabela #anders #prince sebastien #kirkwall

[meowmeowmage]

Late Night Conversation

[ Anders and templar!Carver have a conversation post-Chantry boom. Anders positive. Carver is actually nice to Anders. Handers ]

They had all escaped Kirkwall on Isabela's brand new ship. And while everyone was currently in the gallery drinking for variety of reasons, Anders was out on the deck, still processing being spared. Hawke hadn't expressed any anger, hatred, or judgement towards him like Anders had expected. There had been only support and love which Anders still found so surprising.

He heard footsteps and turned slightly to see Carver walking up to him, thankfully having gotten rid of his templar armor.

"Have you come to berate me?" Anders asked. Carver had been rude to him on multiple occasions before, and Anders being the reason both he and his brother had to leave their home would alone be a reason for Carver to have come seeking retribution or simply to vent his anger at the person responsible for it.

"No," Carver said, "Garrett actually forbade us to speak badly to you or upset you in any way, though that's not why I'm not doing it."

Anders lifted his eyebrows in surprise.

"He did that?"

"Yeah," Carver said with amusement, "He has this particular look when he's protecting people he thinks won't or can't protect themselves. He used to wear it all the time when Bethany and I were little. And while I've poked him quite a lot in the past I actually know when to quit. Fenris apparently doesn't and now he's nursing a broken nose. Garrett can throw quite the punch, especially for a mage."

Anders bit his lower lip with satisfaction. A warmth spread through his body at the thought of Garrett protecting him like that.

"It probably had to do with growing up and living free. The Circles are not exactly the places for mages to build muscles. Or to live." He couldn't help adding that.

"Yeah, definitely not for living, that's for sure," Carver said with a note of acidity in his tone that Anders didn't expect. "Speaking of the Circle, I actually came here to thank you."

Anders got a whiplash from how sudden he turned towards Carver, eyes wide with shock.

"What for?"

"They were gonna annul the Gallows," Carver said, "There were talks, or rather vile boastings, about Meredith having sent for The Right of Annulment. So many of the Order couldn't fucking wait to start killing and maiming even more brazenly and in the open."

The disgust in Carver's voice brought a smile to Anders's lips. How low the bar was, if not being a murderous bigoted piece of shit was worthy of a smile.

"I wanted to be so sure that she'd be denied," Carver continued, "But eventually I had to admit to myself that it wouldn't have mattered. Even if the Divine refused, and I don't think she would've, it wouldn't have mattered two shits to Meredith. Look how quick she was to decide to annul the Gallows without official approval just for the actions of one mage who had never even been part of the Gallows. There's just no way she wouldn't have had the whole Circle slaughtered in the night sooner or later if you haven't forced everyone to act."

Anders was stunned. He definitely didn't expect Carver to have seen the situation the way Anders himself had.

"Yes, she would have," he confirmed, "But I don't see how that's a reason for you to thank me. Unless... you had someone to lose if the Gallows were annulled. A mage...," Anders trailed. He had always found that kind of relationship quite disturbing.

"No!" Carver said hastily, "It wouldn't have been right. Getting involved with someone who couldn't really tell me 'no', or would say 'yes' out of self-preservation. I... once I got propositioned by a fourteen years old girl just because she thought if I claimed her as mine first, the more nasty templars wouldn't rape her or turn her tranquil... it's so fucking messed up... I refused, of course. Three months later she was made tranquil by that bastard Alrik."

Anders took note of how much what Carver had said had affected him. He wasn't sure what Carver had thought life in the Gallows as a temple would be, but it clearly was worse than he had prepared for.

"You weren't cut out to be a templar you know. But that still doesn't explain why you're thanking me."

"Right. You're painfully aware of what happens to the mages during an annulment. But do you know what happens to the templars?"

Anders frowned in confusion. The answer was obvious, surely.

"They murder mages," Anders said tersely.

"Yes. And if they refuse - they get killed as well. So you see, I would've either had to murder in cold bood dozens of innocents, children included, for not even a half decent reason, and would have had to live with their blood on my hands for the rest of my life. Or I would've been killed. So I would've been either a dead or a man I would've hated. But thanks to you I'm neither. And I can say I was on the right side and fought for a good cause."

Anders couldn't blink away the tears. He had prepared himself for hatred, accusations, persecution. But never for this. Never to be thanked. Tears rolled down his cheek and upon noticing them Carver swore in mild alarm.

"Hey, don't cry! If Garrett sees I made you cry he'd break my nose as well!"

Anders managed a small laughter.

"I'm sure he wouldn't. Thanks for talking to me, Carver."

Carver nodded and left. A few minutes later another set of steps was heard and Anders turned to see Garrett approaching with a small smile.

"Hey, love."

[ AO3 link ]

#anders #anders dragon age #carver hawke #carver #handers #anders positive #fuck the chantry #carver is nice to anders #cw: rape #cw: genocide #i don't like canon so I'm writing my own #hawke #my fics #my posts

[bubbles-for-all-of-us]

headcanons with Fenrys. How would he be when you are on your period. Something fluffy

Considering mine is coming up soon I'll let myself indulge in this. To all my girls on their periods you are rocking!

Code red

Fenrys knows about it at least a week prior. And not just because of the shifting hormones that twist your usual scent. It's all the little things that catch his attention. How you rub your back more often. How you dunk your bread in the leftover sauce on his plate. How you wriggle just a tag more before falling asleep. Not to mention you shoving his hand away from your chest - a usual practice Fenrys liked to indulge in after a long day - because your breasts are sore.

He knows the number one rules - never bring it up and never ask about it clearly, so Fenry's preparation for your cycle is most undercover. He dips into the town after one of his meetings. Stopping at your favorite sweets shop and making sure to get a good mix of all the things that you liked. Then stop by the bakery that makes your favorite bread rolls dipped in cheese. Not without a warning point to everyone that if they even as much as looked at the food that Fenrys brought back he wouldn't hesitate and let you snap their necks.

He finds you in your shared room sitting in the bathtub. You do stretch out your leg in a seductive manner making Fenrys roll his eyes at you. Yet your eyes go big the moment your mate pulls a huge bouquet from behind his back. The stems are all different lengths suggesting that... "Did you...", you lean closer to the side of the tub, Fenrys only nod, "Pick them myself? Yeah. I know that you don't like all of those perfectly wrapped...", but he doesn't get to finish the sentence as you lean forward catching a grip of his shirt and pulling Fenrys closer to you.

By the evening your mood would dip completely. If he got to hear your giggles and moans a couple of hours ago, now it's all covered up by a tight smile. Fenrys offers to bring you a plate upstairs if you don't feel like going to the dining room but you shrug him off, saying that it's not a big deal. Not to mention that you barely swallow a bite or two. Mostly just pushing the food around the plate. But Fenrys doesn't push you to eat, nor does he comment on it. He attempts to playfully feed you some of the food from his plate but that only grants him a couple of bites more from you until you simply shake your head.

When everyone settles in the living room, Fenrys is quick to pull you onto his lap. He lets you find a comfortable position and presses his palm to your stomach, letting the heat from his skin creep through the material of your dress. You let out a low-pitched sigh as the tightness eases up a bit, moving to place a loving kiss onto Febry's neck as you mutter a quick thank you.

The smell of blood the next morning startles Fenrys slightly but then his mind catches up with was doomed to happen and so the white wolf only snuggles closer to your body, pouring all the body heat your way.

You would attempt to push him away with, "Fen, I feel disgusting don't touch me", but the male would only shake his head carelessly, "Look just as beautiful as ever to me", and that would make you roll your eyes but at the same time, your heart would skip a beat knowing that you truly have the most perfect mate.

And let's talk about a true code red scenario. You two end up drifting back to sleep, just your period this time around is way more heavy than before, causing you to leak. Not to mention the amount of pain you're in. You wake up with a twisting pain, clenching your lower stomach as another cramp shoots through your body. Fenrys stirs shortly after. He catches the sight of you trying to get up but the back pain is making it hard.

So he jumps out of the bed, only to see that his pants are stained from your blood. Now man has to think twice as hard because he knows how sensitive all of this can be and the last thing he wants is to make you more upset, so Fenrys quickly pulls his pants off before walking closer to your side.

Just you clock on faster than he thought you would and once your eyes shine up with tears, Fenrys knees in front of you, "It's normal, hey. How about I help you clean up?", rubbing your thighs gently Fenrys, helps you up. Constantly reassuring you that this was okay, that he didn't mind it, and that you had nothing to be sorry about. He doesn't fully take over you are on your period not incapable of cleaning yourself. Yet he still warms up a damp cloth for you and grabs you a fresh pair of underwear, and one of his large shirts to throw over your body. Even offers to braid your hair so that once the flashes of heat hit your body, the sweaty hair wouldn't feel even more disgusting against your skin.

There's just so much patience. So much love and care in everything that he does. You don't get to walk back to the bed because Fenrys carries you there. The bad also is now lined with fresh covers. With a gentle kiss on your forehead, Fenrys rushes down to the kitchen to get you one of those flow teas that the rest of the females around the house drink, grabbing the bag of sweets as well, just in case.

He finds you curled into a ball with a frown on your face and it kills him, it always does become besides being caring he can't truly do anything. So he quickly shifts into his wolf form, nudging your arm with his snout, urging you to move slightly because in this form he can't lift you. Your open your eyes lazily, "You don't have to do this", you mutter, causing the wolf in front of you to roll his eyes. Fenrys nudges you once more and you finally manage to lift yourself slightly so Fenrys could settle behind you and wrap you up within his furry body so you would be in this cocoon of warmth at all times. The warmth feels sweeter than any chocolate and a satisfactory moan leaves your lips, Fenrys tilts his head slightly. You run your fingers over the bridge of his nose, before leaning in to kiss it softly.

#fenrys x reader #fenrys moonbeam x reader #fenrys moonbeam #fenrys imagine #fenrys moonbeam imagine #tog imagine #tog x reader #throne of glass imagine #throne of glass x reader #rowan whitethorn #lorcan salvaterre #gavriel #the cadre

[ghastlytofu]

Read a comment that claimed Fenris was secure in his elven identity so he "could teach Sera not to be such a hypocrite" which.... Fenris?? Fenris who struggles yea verily with his own internalized racism? Who describes city elves as 'squandering their freedom, living like frightened cattle'? Who describes the Dalish as grubbing in the dirt and rolls his eyes when Merrill tries to bond over their elvishness? Who, in his short story, sees a homeless elf and looks at him in disgust - not at the human society that put him there, but at the elf for not fighting back hard enough? That Fenris??

I appreciate both of these characters dearly, don't get me wrong. They were/are my first loves in their respective games. But Sera gets lambasted for being a city elf with messy feelings about elves due to her trauma while Fenris - who is also a city elf with messy feelings about elves due to his trauma - gets a pass presumably because he's a Hot Woobified Man and fandom will never hold Hot Woobified Men to the same impossible standards they subject women to.

And I wonder how much Hawke being human vs. the Inquisitor potentially (1/4 of the time anyway) being an elf plays into it? In that case it feels like people bristle at elves making questionable comments about elves when they're directed at their Super Nice Player Character and therefore Sera is MEAN!!1 abt elves bc Lavellan but Fenris is NOT MEAN!!1 abt elves because.. Hawke is human so they weren't personally insulted I guess?? Which, um. Is a take.

#it just makes me tired. people do the same thing with w/ sera's fear of magic #tearing her a new one while cullen the literal templar is Totally Reasonable #oh to be a hot male character in fandom. everything you say taken and gently analyzed... your pain acknowledged.. your strengths celebrated #fandom critical #dragon age

[high-dragon-bait]

The Extremely Petty Reason I Hate Sebastian

Please do not take this seriously. I'm not main-tagging this because I do not wanna die, and may delete this if people go insane, but I've been wanting to make a post about it for awhile and this blog is for talking about by feelings on my favorite game so here goes

It is SOLELY because of how he talks to Fenris

Nearly all of his dialogues with Fenris are like this

Do you see it?

Do you see it?

This is the one that really did it for me, mostly because I misinterpreted it as being directed towards the sexual abuse Fenris faced at the hands of Danarius and it disgusted me so much I had to close the game

I understand now that's probably not what Sebastian was talking about but it was too late. Even knowing he isn't referring to that this is such an over the line thing to say that I can't forgive it

Every interaction with Fenris that he has reads like a Evangelical missionary trying to convert someone in a vulnerable state to their cult faith and it's fucking gross. It's actually nauseating

Now, I actually think Fenris having faith is interesting. I was raised atheist myself, I can't understand faith like someone who was raised religious does. But I do understand having a complex relationship with the concept of faith, especially the idea of faith feeling appealing, but finding the people and ideas behind faith hostile to who you are. That's the kind of relationship with faith I like to imagine Fenris has

But god I cannot stand the way Sebastian talks to him. I can't not find it predatory, and it makes Sebastian come off as so insidious that he is the only Dragon Age character I actively hate. Usually with characters I don't like I just ignore them, but Sebastian I hate. Sebastian makes me physically angry

I say it's petty because it really is JUST this. Just how he talks to Fenris, and since Fenris is my Prime Blorbo I'm soooooooo biased it's ridiculous. Also because Anders is terrible to Fenris but I can forgive that, probably because Fenris is equally as terrible back.

Sebastian acts creepy towards my fav and the game never seems to acknowledge how creepy he's being and for that I cannot stand the sight of Sebastian. I am so sorry. I know plenty of people like Sebastian and you have my utmost respect but to me the man's vibes are so rancid I may start gagging

#anti-sebastian #anti sebastian #don't look at this if you like seb #negative #idk man i don't want the seb stans to find this