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#fake dating is just
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Part 4 and End of Alastor's bad day Alastor survived his fake date and will probably (not) think twice in the future before trying to one-up Lucifer on unknown projects. Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3
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bigskyandthecoldgun · 8 months
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steddie fake dating au that starts because robin’s mom keeps pushing for her and steve to get together and robin gets so fed up that she yells, “it’s not gonna happen because some people are gay, mom!”
and upon seeing the utter horror and fear on her face, steve swoops in and says he’s the one who’s gay. cue mr. and mrs. buckley, local hippies, attempting to show how supportive they are, and all the while steve gets eddie to agree to fake date to get the buckleys to prove they’re safe, so that robin will feel comfortable enough to come out to her parents.
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You ever have those moments where an idea just... won't leave your head?
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mrghostrat · 4 months
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404 ERROR BRAINCELL NOT FOUND
They froze as soon as he pulled back from it, looking dead at each other, close enough that Aziraphale could see his shock-wide eyes through his tinted lenses. “Nggk— yep. You remember how to get back here?” Suddenly breathless, like he must have left his voice all the way over there on Crowley’s cheek, Aziraphale nodded far too quickly and turned to leave the room. [BNF]
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the-witchhunter · 8 months
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DP x DC: Puppy Love
Waiting for my friend in the emergency room(they’re fine, we’ll not fine obviously but not actively dying) so might as well write on my phone
So if there are two things I’m adamant about it’s that Alfred should still be alive and that DC SHOULD GIVE JASON BACK HIS DOG
For those poor souls that do not know, Jason had a dog name, and this is 100% true, Dog. Jason is canonically bad at naming things so he named his dog Dog. And the storyline between him and her is actually really touching. He rescued her from a dog fighting ring where she was used to bait dogs. Jason earned her trust showed her kindness and she loves him for it and it makes me emotional. GIVE JASON BACK HIS DOG YOU MONSTERS
She’s not dead just got written out by giving her to someone, but still, that man loves and pampers Dog, gave her an engraved nameplate and everything
But consider Cujo, the ghost of a dog being trained to be a guard dog, put to death long before his time wanting the thing that made him happy in life: his toy. Danny finds him, bonds with him and helps him get back the thing he loves most, and Cujo loves Danny for it.
A story as old as time, a boy and his dog, or in Danny’s case a boy and his ghost dog.
So imagine this: Danny moved to Gotham with Cujo and things are going great, except for one thing.
Cujo has a little crush
Now normally this wouldn’t be a problem, but Cujo is a ghost. Aka he can walk through walls. So when Cujo wants to visit his lady friend, he just bolts right through the wall, and leads Danny on a merry chase.
Meanwhile Jason is confused to come home to his penthouse only to find Dog cuddled up with a smaller green dog that isn’t Beast Boy. The other dog is friendly and gets along with Dog, but it’s driving him crazy wondering how he got in without tripping an alarm. Then there’s a knock on the door
Jason opens the door to find an out of breath guy about his age with black hair, blue eyes and windswept hair that might have been intentional if it hadn’t been for a few leaves stuck in it.
And that’s how Jason met Danny
Cut to this happening a few more times and then turns into organizing little “dates” for their dogs and the while falling slowly in love with each other romcom style
That’s right, this has been a romcom about two dog owners falling in love because their dogs are literally obsessed with each other
Bonus: Danny giving Cujo “the Talk”
Danny, wagging his finger: Don’t make a rosemary’s baby, understand?
Cujo: Bark
Danny: ... good.
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sp0o0kylights · 8 months
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I saw a video today that said, “It’s very uncomfortable as an adult when your friend starts to date somebody who sucks, and you’re all looking at each other going ‘Guys, if this is the person who makes them happy…I think collectively as a unit we can agree that we would rather see them sad. So what's the plan?’” 
And immediately went: modern Steddie AU were Steve dates his high school friend Tommy and everyone is tearing their hair out over how awful he’s being treated. 
Ft. the Party, led by Dustin, hounding Eddie “I could get a man in a SECOND, I just CHOOSE not to date” Munson for help
However:
Eddie is mostly thinking the entire thing is a joke (King Steve and Tommy Hagan? Gay? Together?? Nice try Henderson.) until he runs into Robin. She laments that yeah, they’re bi, but more importantly, Tommy is fucking awful and Steve refuses to see it. 
2. Eddie, maybe, kind of, still has a crush on Steve ("Stop laughing Gareth, everyone has--had! Had a crush on him!") and the guy was never THAT bad in high school---but Tommy Hagan definitely was and a little revenge would be fun.
and finally;
3. Instead of going with the kids' well intentioned but very misguided “Let’s get Eddie to Steal Steve” plan, Eddie meets up with the Robin/Nancy/Jonathan/Argyle/Chrissy dream team to figure out how to prove to Steve that Tommy is horrible. 
Bonus: Robin and Nancy come up with a full proof multi step plan that involves Eddie pissing off Tommy in ways that look completely innocent. The hope is that Steve will see how controlling and unreasonable Tommy is, and break it off.
This hurts no one and just highlights to Steve Tommy's behavior.
Of course, Eddie goes off the rails immediately upon meeting Steve.
Instead of following The Plan, he, with the kids permission and help, gets Tommy to get blow up about THEM.
This is far more successful.
Bonus x2: A large amount of shenanigan's with the kids vs Tommy are involved. As is a scene were Steve breaks down and admits he knows Tommy is terrible, but Tommy puts up with him and Steve "knows how he is."
Eddie goes home, prints out a picture of Tommy and throws cheap ren fair daggers at it for at least three solid hours while he tries to think up ways to prove to Steve Harrington that his parents are wrong, hes very lovable actually.
In fact Eddie would very much like a shot at trying it out, thanks!
(It is also, inevitably, successful.)
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foolishlovers · 5 months
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anything can be a good omens au if you’re unhinged enough
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The reason the fake dating trope works so well for buddie is because even canonically they are both that brand of fucking stupid where they think it’d actually work
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chrollohearttags · 11 months
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they’re totally normal about each other.
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hairmetal666 · 1 year
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Eddie's hanging out with Steve at Family Video when Robin stomps in like a whirlwind.
"Oh, god, I did something so dumb. You have to help meee."
They straighten from where they lean over the counter towards each other, and Eddie takes a big step back, sure that all his big gay feelings for Steve are on display.
"What did you do this time?" Steve smiles with exasperated fondness.
"It's so bad." Robin faceplants with a dramatic wail.
"What happened?" Eddie asks
"I--I'm so sorry!" She looks at both of them, and a tingle of panic works it's way up Eddie's spine.
"My parents started going on and on about me and Steve and why we won't just admit we're dating, and I started to freak out because they won't accept that we're just friends, and I'm not ready to tell them that I'm a lesbian, even though I think it would be okay, so, I told them you were dating someone, Steve."
"Well, that's not so bad, Rob. So, what, they think I have a girlfriend? Who cares."
Her shoulders slump and she frowns. "I wish that's what they thought. They kept asking who, and I panicked!"
"Robin." Steve looks alarmed now, his pretty mouth pulled into a grimace. "What did you tell them?"
"Okay, please don't hate me," she begs. She's looking at Steve, but then she's looking over at Eddie. And oh, god, oh fuck, this can't be happening.
"You've got to be kidding me, Buckley," he says. He keeps his voice light but the touch of panic has become a punch.
"Wait. How do you know--how does he--? Who am I dating?"
"Me, Harrington. She told them you were dating me."
"Oh," Steve shrugs. "Sure."
Eddie chokes on air, plays it off. "For you maybe, Stevie. We in the Munson household have standards."
Steve doesn't meet a beat. "I'll have you know, Edward, that I am a catch."
"Yeah, for the lovely ladies of Hawkins," Eddie winks, even though every word, every gesture aches.
"Oh, c'mon! I'm a great boyfriend. Defend me here, Robin"
Normally, Eddie finds these antics to be charming, but confronting his crush on Steve so forcefully has ruined his mood.
"Need a cigarette," he says to escape.
He's only alone for a few minutes before Steve is sidling up next to him.
"What's she need us to do?"
"Dinner."
He grimaces, exhaling a plume of smoke. "I'm so bad at meeting the parents."
"Shut-up." Steve pokes him in the chest. "Everyone loves you. It's kind of obnoxious, actually. Plus, I think this'll help her feel more comfortable about coming out."
He snorts if only so he doesn't have to think about Steve talking about him and love in the same sentence.
"Fine. For Buck, I'll do it." But he doesn't know how he'll get through pretending to date his biggest crush with out spontaneously combusting.
"Love the enthusiasm," Steve laughs. "You know I'd treat you right, Munson."
The blush that rolls over his face is crimson. "Alright, big boy, calm down. We're not actually dating."
The bark of laughter Steve lets out is a burst of pure adrenaline to Eddie's heart. This is going to be a disaster.
---
The night of the dinner arrives and Eddie almost blows the whole game when they walk in the Buckley front door and Steve's arm wraps around his waist. The night is all casually intimate touches and Steve leaning into his personal space; calling him "baby" in a soft, warm voice; eyes drifting to Eddie's lips as they flirt and banter.
It's almost like they're a couple; almost like Steve could love him.All of his senses are overwhelmed with Steve Harrington and it fucking hurts. But Eddie lets himself indulge, finally running his fingers through Steve's gorgeous hair, tracing the moles on his face and neck, outlining the sharpness of his perfect jaw, calling him "sweetheart" with heartbreaking fondness.
It's intoxicating.
They're helping Mrs. Buckley with the dishes when it happens. When Steve leans over and casually presses his lips to Eddie's, tasting like vanilla ice cream and spiced apples and something indefinably warm. Eddie is helpless not to crumple, leans into Steve, wraps fists into the perfectly fitted polo, drawing them closer.
The night ends and Eddie thinks he's finally free, except the Buckleys love them. Keep inviting them back.
He goes for Robin, he tells himself, but he knows that it's for the hope of it. Knows that he's a ship breaking himself against the rock that is Steve Harrington, and god help him, he can't stop.
---
Of course, of course, the wires get crossed. The kids have a pool party, leave Steve and Eddie to ice cream clean-up duty. Of course, he can't stop himself from smearing some melted mint chip down Steve's face, and Steve retaliates with chocolate sauce.
They giggle and flight and make mess until Steve's eyes are bright, cheeks red, and Eddie can't look away. He clocks Steve's eyes drifting to his mouth, is helpless as the distance between them closes, as Steve captures his lips.
It's not the brief, chaste things from the Buckley's; it's hot, all tongues and teeth and desire, and it's not fucking real.
Eddie lurches back, making Steve stumble. "Stop," he snarls.
"Eddie--" Steve's eyes are wide.
He's panting, can't catch his breath. "You can't just fucking kiss me like that when it doesn't mean anything to you."
"Please," Steve begs. "Let me explain."
"Save it. We're done with this. Robin is good now. And I'm out."
He turns away, heads towards the front door, but Steve pulls him back.
"Let me explain. Please. Please, Eddie. I didn't mean--"
And it's too much. Steve's plaintive voice, his big eyes wet with tears.
"Of course you didn't mean it," he spits. "It's nothing to you, pretending to date me. Touching me. Kissing me. Acting like you love me. It doesn't matter to the Heartthrob of Hawkins. But have you or Buckley ever taken the time to think that it's everything to me?" Hot tears spill down his cheeks and he can't even be embarrassed because all of this has been so humiliating.
Steve gapes at him, face slack and stunned. "Eddie, I--I'm so--"
"Don't. See you around, Harrington," he says. Then he runs.
---
He doesn't leave the trailer for a week. Refuses to pick up the phone.
It's Saturday, early evening. Wayne just left for his shift when there's a knock on the door.
Eddie is content to ignore it, to wrap himself in a quilt on the couch, but the knocking doesn't stop.
"Eddie, I know you're in there. Your van is here. The lights are on. I can hear you," Steve calls.
Longing clenches at his heart, but he's not in the mood for the gentle let down.
"Go away, Harrington." He starts towards his bedroom, thinking maybe he can lock Steve out.
"Please, Eddie."
"I don't need anything from you, Harrington."
It's silent for long enough that Eddie thinks it works. And then, " I have so many things I should tell you, Eds. If you still hate me at the end, I'll go. I'll never bother you again. But please, please listen."
Resigned to having a conversation he never wanted, Eddie opens the door. "Okay, Harrington."
Steve steps inside, twisting his hands for a few seconds before blurting out, "I've had a crush on you for months."
The confession briefly steals Eddie's breath from his lungs before he scoffs, "and you never said anything? C'mon, Harrington, when have you ever hesitated to ask someone out?"
Steve blinks a few times, before he answers. "I've been terrified to say anything because I didn't want to lose my best friend."
"And what, Robin asks us to pretend to date and you think that's the perfect time to make your move?" Eddie grips at his hair, pulling it in front of his face.
"Yeah, a little bit!" Steve raises his voice. "I tried but I was terrified you only wanted me as a friend."
"You know I'm gay, Harrington!"
"What the fuck does that mean?"
"Of course I wanted you!" Eddie's yelling now, has closed the distance between them so they're almost nose-to-nose.
"I didn't know! How could I? You could've said something!"
"I thought you were straight! Fucking look at you! You've slept with 75% of the available girls at Hawkins High!"
"Who cares about them, Eddie? I want you!"
"Funny way of showing it, Harrington."
"What do you want me to say? That I'm sorry? Cause I am."
"Is that why you kissed me at your house? Making your move?"
"It wasn't supposed to be. I got--" Steve's throat bobs as he swallows. "Caught up in the moment. I know I shouldn't have kissed you like that. I know."
"Then why did you?" Eddie's voice breaks. "Why then? Why not any of the other nights we spent together?"
"Because that's when I realized that I'm fucking in love with you!" Steve shouts.
They're both breathing hard by the end, Steve's eyes too bright, face too flushed. They stare at each other, unmoving, Steve's confession ringing in his ears.
"You done?" Eddie's voice waivers, his heart pounding, stuttering, flipping in his chest.
Steve nods, but Eddie doesn't give him a chance to move. He brings their mouths crashing together, Steve not even hesitating to slip his tongue between Eddie's lips. They kiss hard enough that they draw blood, but that just makes it more frenzied. Eddie grips Steve's hip, presses him against the trailer door, grinding against him with abandon.
Eddie breaks the kiss to finally pay some attention to the delightful moles on Steve's neck, working his way up to his jaw. "I'm going to have so much fun taking you apart, sweetheart," he whispers, mouth pressed to Steve's ear, delighting in the way he shivers at the words.
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foreverdolly · 30 days
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ೃ࿔FOREVERDOLLY'S AUSTIN BUTLER MASTERLIST
"𝙞 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙝𝙤𝙡𝙙 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙘𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙚. 𝙨𝙤𝙛𝙩 𝙗𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙨, 𝙗𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙩. . . "
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✶ TATTOOED HEART ONESHOT (BIKER!AUSTIN X READER)
austin is the club president of a local outlaw biker gang- a one percenter. he lies, he kills and he doesn't apologize for it. he was one weakness- you. when he gets a distressed late night call from you he's quick to come to your rescue. the only problem? your own father was in the same motorcycle club that austin now runs, and after his death you cut all contact. when you two see each other again emotions run high and things get. . . a little out of control.
total word count: 12.1k
✶ BABY BUTLER MASTERLIST (DAD! AUSTIN X MOM!READER) COMPLETED
you get pregnant while in australia, your husband still in the process of filming for the elvis biopic. this series follows you and austin as you both navigate being first-time parents whilst in the public eye.
total word count: 8.7k
✶ BABY LOVE ONESHOT (DOM!AUSTIN X SELF CONSCIOUS!READER)
you've gained some “relationship” weight since you and austin first started dating, and you find yourself growing more and more self conscious as time goes on. austin takes his time letting you know just how beautiful he finds you.
total word count: 3.6k
✶ OOPSIE DAISY ONESHOT (AUSTIN X INJURED!READER)
austin tries to protect you from journalists and paparazzi. he get's big time mad when one of them get's a little too close to you.
total word count: 2.4k
✶ ARE YOU MINE ONESHOT (EX'S BEST FRIEND!AUSTIN X READER)
after a bad breakup with your cheating ex, the last thing you’re expecting is for his best friend to side with you. at his insistence, you decide to let him accompany you to the arctic monkey concert in las vegas. what happens in las vegas doesn’t always stay in las vegas.
total word count: 13.1k
✶ FAKE DATING MASTERLIST (BOSS!AUSTIN X EMPLOYEE!READER)
you absolutely can't stand your boss. after one bad run in with him, you decide that he's office enemy number one. so when your mother breaks the news that your ex boyfriend is bringing his new fiancé to your sister's wedding as his plus one, you lie and tell her you'll be bringing your very own boyfriend along with you to greece. the problem? you don't actually have a boyfriend. so when austin butler, your arch nemesis of a boss, offers to be your fake boyfriend, you have to take him up on it. greece is a beautiful place to fall in love, no?
total word count: 21.5k
✶ TEAR YOU APART (BIKER!AUSTIN X READER)
"I want it to hurt" and "quit being such a brat"
total word count: 1.8k
✶ I JUST RIDE MASTERLIST (80's MECHANIC! AUSTIN X BEST FRIEND! READER)
it's starting to look like he might never make it out of the friend zone. austin has been in love with you for as long as he can remember, and he's terrified that you'll never see him as anything more than a best friend and protector. with the fear of you one day outgrowing him fresh on his mind, he's now hell bent on getting you to view him in a different light. madly in love and terrified to lose you, austin butler is playing for keeps.
total word count: 8.5k
✶ SHOTGUN WEDDING ONESHOT (AUSTIN!TEX WATSON X KIDNAPPED!READER)
the year is 1969 and you find yourself lucky enough to live up in the hollywood hills, spending your days dancing away to your favorite rock n’ roll vinyls in an old farmhouse and looking after your wild roommates. the only problem? you’ve caught the eye of tex watson. how does he spend his days? making moves towards finally getting everything that he could ever want. you.
total word count: 16.5k
✶ DASHBOARD JESUS ONESHOT (AUSTIN!TEX WATSON X READER)
"I can't. . .please. . . I can't take it anymore." and "good boy."
total word count: 2.5k
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"𝙖𝙨 𝙞 𝙬𝙝𝙞𝙨𝙥𝙚𝙧 𝙞𝙣 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙚𝙖𝙧 ' 𝙞 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙣𝙖 𝙛𝙪𝙘𝙠𝙞𝙣' 𝙩𝙚𝙖𝙧 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙖𝙥𝙖𝙧𝙩 '. . . "
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shitouttabuck · 3 months
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don’t wanna let you love somebody else but me
buck/eddie | 14.7k | rated t
“Well, we’re doing a fancy dinner and mini golf and karaoke,” Buck says, “and those are kinda date activities anyway, right?” “Right,” Eddie says slowly. “Except it’s Chim’s bachelor party, so we can hardly bring dates along, even if we could find them. That’d be weird.” “Well,” Buck says, “I was thinking… what if we were each other’s dates?” Eddie’s brain bluescreens for a moment. Buck must take his total lack of reaction for disagreement, because he hurriedly says, “Like, a pretend date. That way we could test out our, like you said, moves on each other. And then be totally truthful about whether they worked or not. So we get honest feedback and we don’t have to worry about finding someone to try them out on and we can still make it to Chim’s party. And then give Chris some advice before Sunday. Right? Does that make sense?”
or, chris wants dating advice and it turns out taking your best friend on a pretend date to practice being as romantic as possible is not a good idea in theory or in practice, considering the pesky being-in-unrequited-love of it all
read on ao3
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 9 months
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No Sharing.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
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miabrown007 · 6 months
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the summer after finishing university in New York, Marinette gets invited to a camping trip with Alya and Nino and his best friend. which, honestly, is for the best. at least she has more time than the four years she's already had to figure out how to reach out to her one-time superhero partner, with whom she fell out of touch after the reveal.
only, it's Adrien Agreste waiting for them on the meeting point, beaming so hard at her that it's blatantly obvious they know each other well. in her panic, what is Marinette supposed to tell Alya and Nino to protect their identites, if not that they used to date?
(fake exes AU x there was only one tent)
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aardvaark · 2 months
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i was thinking about how i wished leverage had a birthday episode for some of the characters cause that would be sweet, but then i realised something and basically…. okay here’s my thoughts in quotes form, just for fun
hardison: so when’s your birthday? i could plan something for us and the team to do and-
parker: i dont know
hardison: you don’t know… your own birthday?
parker: no, how would i know? pshh, cmon, you’re telling me you remember EXACTLY when you were born? watch this - hey, eliot, do you know your exact birth date?
eliot, innocently passing by, who was canonically anonymously dropped off at a hospital as an infant: no, how would i know?
parker: that’s what i said!
hardison: excuse me?? what is going on right now
sophie, walking into the apartment: whats wrong?
hardison: parker and eliot- well, okay, when’s your birthday? i just have to prove something.
sophie: …….july 12th
hardison: why did you pause? wait, is that your birthday or sophie devereaux’s birthday?
sophie: ………… (guilty silence)
parker: see, no one knows their real birthday! haha you’re so weird sometimes, hardison
hardison:
hardison: what the fuck guys
#leverageposting#wren speaks#leverage#parker leverage#alec hardison#nate knows his birthday i guess so i didn’t include him. if he was watching the whole time he would probably say ‘idk’ to mess w hardison#they’re having this convo in nate’s apartment but it’s like 3am & he’s asleep & they’ve all broken in to hang out#parker doesn’t know either bc of her ridiculously neglectful foster parents or bc she’s parker & her priorities are simply different to most#people. her birthday is irrelevant to thievery. and sadly probably not related to fun happy memories anyway.#sophie obviously is a good enough grifter to answer confidently but she feels a little bad abt lying to her family by now#meanwhile hardison had a normal foster nana who would have known his bday. most kids aren’t safe-surrendered like eliot so assumably#hardison would have a known bday. and he likes birthdays!#and he wants to throw parker a little party even if it’s a very unconventional parker bday that involves rappelling & jumping off buildings#but he is once again thwarted by the leverage team members having the strangest possible lives#he IS gonna give them each birthday parties tho. even if he has to make up some dates & stuff#sophie’s can be the fake date she gives if that’s what she rlly wants. nate’s real birthday is on file somewhere even if he’s being annoying#rn so hardison just has to do some basic hacking. eliot would have an approximate bday such as the day he was surrendered that his parents#would have celebrated throughout childhood. and parker’s would be april 1st bc that’s alice whites bday (and YOURE ALICE!!!)#as in it’s canonically in the online info abt alice white shown in the juror no.6 job & obvs that’s april fools so it’s funny :)#and hardison has a NORMAL bday unlike SOME ppl and yes he DOES expect presents you heathens!!
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lokh · 8 months
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WAIT SHUROS DAD SAID HE WANTED HIM TO BRING SOMETHING BACK INTERESTING.... AND WHO IS MORE INTERESTING THAN LAIOS....
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