#everything is getting on track NOW

[hlxtn]

I AM ALIVE OHMGOD

I FEEL SO HORRIBLE FOR GOING AWOL SO SUDDENLY BUt life really wrecked me over the past few months (it's getting better now so its okay) You can read a part of what happened here

but tldr; my friend fucked me over/scammed me during my most vulnerable period and while trying to get ahold of my personal problems I also had to beg for all my money/stock back from the 'friend'. I've been taking socials one-by-one and tumblr is now next for me to come and answer messages and give updates. I will tackle my inbox in the next two days once I get off from work and can properly focus on giving actual replies. Just wanted to quickly update and say I didn't disappear without a reason and I'm really really sorry about that

#the end of the year as been the worst in my life #i had a close family member die #my dad has some kind of tumor examinations going on rn #had to find a new job #and a new place to live #had to get an abortion #friend scammed me #my other ex friend tried to roofie me at a night out because she wanted my ex and was jealous that we still were civil? #and because my friend ran off with my money i was broke AF #i made sure my cat was fed but brah those were the hardest months for ME #everything is getting on track NOW #so it's okay #im slowly building everything back up #i still struggle a lil mentally and having to juggle the shame of failure and shit but we ballin #writing out some of what's been going on doesnt sound as bad but tackling everything alone kinda builds up and sucks ass #doesnt excuse my disappearance but just saying these things so people get to have an overview to what has been happening

[awkwardpossum0]

Guys he saw a pink rabbit for real

Not Linked Universe.

#legity on his tiddies #had to get the rabbit expert and everything #you guys already know that's my spirit tracks link #but this is my ocarina of time/majoras mask link #most people call him Time #but i'm calling him #Thyme #at least for now #if you have any suggestions that would be great #art #the legend of zelda #digital art #zelda #spirit tracks #I should do more of these fake anime shots they're fun to do

[shima-draws]

Anyway speaking of poly trios. Have any of you considered Lawlusan because MANNNN.

#Shima speaks #Not even going to get into the absolute fucking shitshow (affectionate) that Lawsan is #(Okay maybe a little bit listen Sanji is SO MUCH like Cora I'm sure it would give Law some kind of complex) #(And Law's fanboying over the Sora comics would make Sanji uncomfortable probably. Lol) #Anyway anyway anyway #Luffy having to be the babysitter which is NOT RIGHT bc it's LUFFY. #But Law and Sanji don't take care of themselves sometimes!! And Law is the fucking DOCTOR in the relationship!!! #Sanji making Law eat tho and keeping track of his diet as well as Luffy's #Law keeping an eye on Sanji's body and his mutations... #Law and Luffy finding Sanji UTTERLY CHARMING even tho Sanji's SUCH a fucking loser #Luffy & Sanji @ Law: Man he's so fucking cool. What #Meanwhile Law is ALSO a loser #Law and Sanji about Luffy are like. I'm dating the sun. The sun incarnate. Literal sunshine personified #Law being the one to keep a level head when everything's gone to shit. Bc even Sanji can lose his cool sometimes #Luffy loving his grumpy boyfriends so so so SO much it's unreal #Law and Sanji having a Limit on how much they can be cuddled in one day - #But it's perfect bc they can trade Luffy off with each other bc we all know he's clingy af #Law: Need space. Can you go cuddle Sanji-ya #Luffy: Okay Torao <333333 #Sanji: Law get sick of you? #.Luffy: He needed space!!! Anyway I'm going to cuddle you now #Sanji: C'mere then <3 #I'm ill. Tee hee. #Lawlusan #Lawlu #Sanlu #Lawsan #One Piece

[theshadowrealmitself]

I need other people to imagine Spiderman with all his hair everywhere being bright blue and red, with his eyes completely spidery black when he’s not wearing glasses, has venomous fangs, and he has a fit body under the spandex and stuff, like that’s his default way of looking

But when he’s out and about as Peter Parker, he wears the coke bottle thick glasses over brown eyes that can’t see for shit, he dyes his hair brown and has to wear mascara and stuff to make his eyelashes and eyebrows look like normal human colors, he hides his fangs, he wears a ton of layers of loose clothing and slouches to look as much like a weak nerd as possible

And then when he’s out as Spidey, he’ll still wear like a blonde wig over his hair after washing out the brown dye (I like to think he sciences up his own hair dye stuff that shows the color perfectly without killing his hair so it’s still soft and easily washes out with a solution he made for it), and colored contacts, and stuff

And when Nick Fury finally sees him without his stuff, like it was an intense fight with carnage or something and Spidey’s suit is torn and bloody, his wig is gone, cried out the colored contacts awhile ago, his fangs are flashing because of the adrenaline from the attack, he tears off the torn remains of his mask, so Nick Fury whips around aaaaaaannnnnd he still has no idea who Spidey is because that’s not how he walks around as a civilian

#it’s funny to me #think about it #share this scene with me #overly anxious Peter Parker #battling all of SHIELD’s ways of tracking people down #now Nick Fury is trying to get a hold of x-men information which is proving difficult af #(and he doesn’t find anything because Peter Parker never lived at the mansion) #Peter spends awhile after this thinking that because Nick Fury saw him without his mask he now knows Everything™️ #so he’s just anxiously waiting for SHIELD to come break his door down but it doesn’t happen because how tf would he connect them?? #Spiderman #spider man #spider-man #Peter Parker #Nick Fury

[edwardwonghaupepelutivrusky4th]

wah i looove their designs and animation...

#sketched last night looped ''hot air balloon'' track last night rewatched elemental last night you know just how it is....i love it all augh #elemental #elemental 2023 #pixar elemental #elemental fanart #ember lumen #wade ripple #it's so fun how just going w/the flow waviness drawing a wade is Correct. some flamey shiveriness / jaggedness in ember's lines is Correct #and it's all the more fun how it's like oh ofc not quite hitting the mark of how great their designs really are....so so good #and of course the expressive elasticity not only with their faces but the way their bodies ft. respective elements can be expressive #in addition to just usual [assume you have a usual literal human body] expressiveness options in posture / movement etc lol #also was thinking about how like we know everything we Need to know re: wade & his dad but also have so [zero details there] #which is interesting to wonder about. kinda assumed like oh a parent got sick & died but now considering how it could've been an accident.. #the tiny layer of A Reaction he has when ember's talking abt parents giving up everything for you: could be nothing much; or Anything #also noting i Didn't note the first instances that they hear each other's names or introduce themselves thusly lol #or at least i sure can't recall it. just start knowing the other's name partway through which Isn't A Problem but it's like #ooh just more to consider & reexamine. i love to pick up More Details & that's helped by my difficulty in catching them in the first place #one thing about me i don't Catch things i don't Notice shit i don't Get stuff. and also of course: i do though lol #always a trip when it's like oh i love this movie i'm seeing it probably the two dozenth time #and then i notice something for the very first time that was clearly straightup meant to be Gotten upon the immediate viewing #even to the extent that smthing later seems to be kinda happening out of nowhere if you didn't. & i'd just rolled with it #like ok i'm autistic ofc that's something i gotta do all the time. & the adhd means i might keep getting distracted around the same pts.

[cherry-pop-soda]

okay but does anyone listen to bronski beat and does anyone GET IT. they released an album, completely unashamedly gay, in the 80s, during the AIDS crisis, during a time of insanely rampant homophobia and over the top conservatism. they released an album with the age of consent for homosexual activity in every european country listed on the sleeve and the phone number for a legal advice hotline for queer people etched into the grooves of the vinyl. they released an album with the opening track dedicated to a hate crime victim, featuring vocals from an openly gay choir. they released an album with songs about homophobic violence, the dangers of following the bible too closely, about leaving behind everything you know and starting over, about homophobic family and homophobic bullying. they wrote about being gay and being proud of it and knowing that there is nothing wrong with who you are. in the face of all the hatred going on in the 80s they released an album that was in-your-face gay and fuck-you queer, and i love them for it.

(see original tags for a lot more commentary)

#bronski beat #for reference : the album is The Age Of Consent #the man the opening track “Why ?” was dedicated to was Drew Griffiths (who according to wikipedia was a #playwright who was victim to a homophobic murder in 1984) #and the choir was The Pink Singers (an openly gay men’s choir in London) #and like yeah. i know this very much centers gay men HOWEVER . considering everything like the time period and #how songs that would’ve been lesbian (see: Voices Carry by Til Tuesday) being basically straight-washed. and also how rampant homophobia wa #(so getting anything even a little gay released was hard bc it was likely to get smashed down by record stores and companies and #radio stations and music reviewers. and us ones particularly ) #in this case i don’t care whatsoever and besides they did something absolutely monumental for the whole community if you ask me #as a lesbian i am literally so grateful that this exists and i wasn’t even alive at the time. even now it makes me feel seen. #i cant even imagine what it would’ve been like for a queer kid in the 80s to hear that and maybe know they weren’t alone #so in conclusion: bronski beat i love you forever and jimmy somerville i love you forever

[synthshenanigans]

Hey do you wanna test if you know every chonny jash song? Like EVERY chonny jash song? Like all 107 songs on his channel?

Well now you can :}

#this includes all the megalovania covers & mario is dead tracks #literally everything but the instrumentals & album videos #If you can somehow manage to get a score of 95-100% #[this is coming from the guy whos one of the top 5 listeners of Chonny Jash & who got a 93% on this quiz] #If you get anything above a 95% #you are insane #like i will not believe you if you get a 98% or 100% without looking anything up #Because i don't think Chonny himself can list them all off the top of his head in 20 minutes #Maybe like down the line in time if someone were to study or practice this #but as of right now? n o #because like. why #i mean its still possible ofc. main thing i think would be difficult it the random singles from 2 years ago & the mario is dead album #but if i walked up to like 99% of jash fans rn they could not answer every single one #I missed like 6-8 answers out of 107 & I already label myself as mostly not sane #so i feel bad for anyone who gets higher than that #/lhj of course #but still crazy if you can but also congrats?? #but jash has stolen like 30% of your brain & you should be paid for your troubles #chonny jash #moss post #moss quizzes

[dragons-and-yellow-roses]

Me, while manically cleaning my room at 3:27am: I should make several large, life-changing, irreversible decisions.

#so ive been in a bad mental state lately #because of many things. but the biggest being (yes i know ive complained about this in multiple other posts) #that my best friend and my ex gf were fucking. without even asking or telling me. i got no heads up. just figured it out on my own #which sucked and now im not speaking to either of them #and when i first found out i was in a bad place physically too #i had a terrible ear infection that was so fucking painful #and i realized i could concentrate on both things. so i focused on healing #and then i remembered ny family is coming to visit for Christmas #and thats a lot to deal with. so now im focusing on cleaning the apartment. specifically my bedroom #so im manically cleaning at 3:30am while angry and stressed and trying not to focus on this thing that makes me really upset #and in the middle of cleaning ill suddenly think 'should i quit my summer camp job?' or 'should i move states again?' #its not good. but i havent acted on anything #AND in the middle of cleaning i found all of my meds #i havent been taking them for months. but i decided im gonna start taking them again #i have a few refills left but then ill have to find a psychiatrist. i dont want to. but its definitely for the best #im trying to get my life back on track and build and better it #but then something hits me and completely derails everything and makes everything so hard #so anyway im gonna go do some more cleaning and try not to make life-altering decisions. and maybe build a desk #btw i have to get up at 9am to take out my puppy. and at 11:35 i have to get ready for work. again its 3:30am #and im full of manic energy #tomorrow is going to be very bad but at least I'll have a semi-clean room

[rissahs]

i expected the las vegas gp to be a shitshow because literally who didnt but goddamn this is legitimately embarrassing. literally the dashcon of f1

#f1 #the track is fucked the cars are getting fucked up everythings getting delayed cuz the track is fucked and now fans are getting kicked out #its legitimately amazing how literally everything has gone wrong

[emblazons]

This album feels like the studio who produced perfect albums like The National’s High Violet & Trouble Will Find Me decided to produce the musings of a 16 year old girl trying to sound more sophisticated than she is her diary and I’m not sorry for saying it.

#I know she’s the queen of the world but. Jesus Christ #‘everything comes off teenage petulance’ << at least she knows on some level Lmao #bestie you had 20 years to have an interesting thought and instead every single track is about men doing you wrong #and how foolishly you deal with that fact instead of evolving in…literally any way as a human being? it’s like 2013 aesthetic tumblr in her #full expected the ‘the risk I took was calculated but man I am and at math’ meme to show up LMAO #how many times do we have to be told a genius of our era is nothing but a WW dragging us along for her bad relationships? #it was fun 4 albums ago. now it’s just getting obnoxious ☠️ #the me tag

[dekarios]

You can talk about it and I don't think you ever stop missing dogs. I lost one this time last year and still miss her and I still miss the my dog that passed in 2012 too. They are family as far as I am concerned and you will probably always miss her.

Hope you are well and if you need to talk about it please do.

thank u this message rly helped

#fray.txt #ask #Anonymous #i miss my pippy too and i still talk about her like shes with us and send her pics when i show my dogs #and shes been gone awhile now.... i dont actually keep track of the dates ngl #i feel like toos just . touched me in a way that . idk . she was my therapy dog she was everything to me . #when i was at my most delusional i thought we were literal soulmates and spiritually connected and stuff #and when i was at my lowest i told her that im gonna stay alive for her. and that when shes gone i'll go too #its so hard breaking a dumb promise i should have never made #but life without her is so considerably worse . getting up out of bed is agony. doing anything just sucks #i cant do Anything without someone encouraging me cuz she would follow me everywhere without fail and shes not there anymore #i still have her beds in my room #i dont have her toys anymore cuz i buried them with her. she took one of my favourite blankets too #god i wish i could just . loop the last 10 years for the rest of my life #never ending cycle of getting her and losing her #i would do it again and again and again . she was the best thing that ever happened to me

[ozcarma]

Trying to watch 999 let’s plays is such hell to me - NO ONE PLAYS THE GAME RIGHT just shutupshutupshutupshutup and play the game!! Stop trying to make jokes!!!!

I’m too autistic for this, I cannot bear hearing let’s players doing their own voice acting when I adore the game’s VAs too much. Everyone always fucks up Santa’s and Lotus’s voices especially.

I understand the draw of Let’s Plays are largely the people playing them who have gained their own following, but as someone who just loves the game I don’t wanna hear ur stupid banter 💥💥💥 play the game and be intrigued but not TOO intrigued because give it a fuckin minute it’ll explain what’s going on 🙄‼️

#zero escape #999 #my opinion is that the let’s plays that are alright are half-blind play thrus where one person is knowledgeable about everything #and can keep the blind one on track and properly guide their curiousity #I also lose my MIND when people get stuck on the puzzles on this ridiculously easy game #(<- says the person who has played it numerous times and knows all the solutions by heart) #like you IDIOT just do THIS #(<- also the person who still has to look up the answer to the box puzzle behind door 6) #and don’t get me started on when the LPers hate Lotus #don’t get me wrong - disliking her especially when u get to the hospital room is Good and Correct as it’s what the writing is leading you to #but some LPers get so misogynistic about it I have to immediately tap out cuz its too much #also another reason why I don’t like when they don’t use the in-game voice acting #is cuz so many people play Junpei as Basic Anime Protag when Evan Smith’s voice acting gives him SO much character #and Junpei is my favorite >:( #I have many more gripes but that’s enough for now #I just want everyone to experience how great this game is but ONLY in the way I LIKE #I know I sound so whiny and entitled but please tell me someone else relates #the urge I get to just make a whole channel dedicated to 999 play thrus where I just play the game again and again with a different friend #would they all be identical to each other because I would be directing them all the same? #yes. but what greater autistic joy is that (for me) #I never thought the Joseph Anderson streams would be my favorite playthrus cuz I hated them too at first #but his dynamic with chat and consistent amusement and enjoyment of the game is very nice and soothing

[oatbugs]

idk how to live so im going to talk to myself out loud until i do

#listen. take a deep breath. i know your bpm is high but you need to think with me for a second. #remember that you are paper thin. all your facets are sheets of paper and what you gave her is just another one. #make a new one. you dont need it. you dont need her to see you. i know you think you need her but you will be okay. i know its hard. #you wish you could have shown her how you loved her. listen to yourself. you are made of paper. #she might be concrete or maybe wood or maybe gold. you need to start laying your roots elsewhere. shut that thought down #and blink and listen. the parts you keep thinking of arent lost. they still happened and they are yours to keep. #there is beauty in this loss. tell me about the beauty in this loss. its okay to think about it. you got to see it all and nothing more #and this is great because it would have been bad. you know it would be violent in a way you dont need. you know this to be true. #you are going to look at that empty space in her shape and youre going to fill it with everything that happened when you knew her. #the memories with her but then also the the way your friends talked you through it. the game with the clovers. #your first allergic reaction you almost died and you couldnt stop laughing and you were held so close to their hearts. #learning the names for all the floursecent gene tracking dyes that everyone else knows already. about the exam - listen again. #i know you think if you fail your life is over but you need to try your best. youre not going to get a good grade in a uni test for the fir #youre going to make up for it. youre going to make sure you make up for it. do you understand? i love you. you have to do this. #right now you need to sit up. breathe. i know your heart hurts. go to the living room. grab something to eat. i dont care if you feel full. #youre going to clean your mattress heater. youre going to study a bit longer and then youre going to sleep. youre going to tell your mother #im sorry and i might genuinely fail a test. shes going to tell you its okay. if you do badly in this course you can just become a neurosurg #just agree. dont argue right now. its okay. youre okay. you are paper thin. i know any puncture hurts. #breathe. think of your friends. think of their hands in yours. it isnt eternal.youve lived through worse. the empty sky is still beautiful. #the lack of her is still beautiful

[keitheaverage]

Really excited abt the TTATC Recobbled Cut Mk5 WIP that dropped recently so I had to draw my darling Princess and Cobbler pair again!!

#the thief and the cobbler #ttatc #tack the cobbler #princess yumyum #princess yum yum #arabian knight #the princess and the cobbler #kei's average art tag #I'm sorry ik I'm like way behind on my art posting here #I've recently gotten back on track with actually drawing now it's just a matter of getting everything posted in a timely manner

[meownotgood]

care to share your updated Aki collection? Would love to see the new wall grid especially now that there's more Aki keychains!

To more Aki purchases ahead <33

yes, of course!!!!

pls ignore the messiness in the aki shrine... I am going to be reorganizing everything as soon as I have the time... I'll post some more pics and closeups whenever I do that.... this is temporary setup

#I'm going to buy some little riser things for the shrine #so I can better display some of the little items and stands #and then when I have a day off I'll take everything down and fully reorganize #but I'm working the rest of this week so that won't be for a while lol #too many akis not enough space!!! #and these two I got today are literally so big they take up so much space 😭😭😭 #BUNCH OF FATTIES #but.... I've got another plushie on the way #and I'm going to order the new aki prize plush that comes out tomorrow as soon as I find a good listing #so I'll hold back on reorganizing until those arrive #then I'll make room for everything #being the parent of so many topknot sons is hard work........ #ask mags #aki <3 #thank you for caring anon. I kiss you #should I link my my figure collection page somewhere? you can keep track of my collection there #me just now noticing I left my 3ds in the pic cause I'm trying to get my mii to have babies with the aki mii I created

[mrpsychokiller]

sorry if im posting too much. i always feel like im posting too much nowadays but idk what to do with this feeling. im probably just online too much (because again i have nowhere else to go) but then i just developed this bizarrely debilitating anxiety that i post too much and i have some kind of Limit that i need to stay under of how many posts im allowed to make a day or otherwise everybody will unfollow me and block me and hate me because im Annoying and i KNOW its just paranoia but it still makes me anxious every single time i press reblog and makes me obsessively analyze how many posts ive made every day before "allowing" myself to post again

#🧃 #ive seriously become like. intensely obsessive #like keeping track of how long ago since the last post i made and then only allowing myself to post again after 1 hour or something #or like checking my queue compulsively to see exactly what and when its gonna post #and putting a bazillion posts on my queue and drafts instead of just reblogging because i Cant Do It Now because ive already Posted Too Muc #i cant stop overthinking everything when literally nobody else in this website cares that much #i like posting but i just cant get myself to relax and do it just for fun #my brain is fucking broken by now