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iamapoopmuffin · 21 days

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Powerpuff Girls episodes explained badly

Monkey See, Doggy Do: Everyone is a dog and/or naked.

Mommy Fearest: The girls try to turn some lady they just met into their step-mother and regret it immediately.

Insect Inside: Bugs are gross. Or are they?

Powerpuff Bluff: Cosplay for crime reasons. And to look cute.

Octi Evil: Bubbles trusts in her plush toy when it suddenly starts talking to her like one of those imaginary friends that tells you to burn things. It goes as well as you'd expect.

Geshundfight: There's too many people on this earth, we need a new plague.

Buttercrush: 1 1/2 year old develops crush on 17 year old who uses her crush to manipulate the shit out of her.

Fuzzy Logic: You don't touch another man's banjo. Ever.

Boogie Frights: An endless disco party ends in Bubbles turning off her targeting computer and blowing up the Death Disco Star

Abracadaver: Zombie magician comes to town and does zombie magician stuff.

Telephonies: Crank calls lead to the one moment in the entire cartoon my family constantly quotes, literally any time anyone says 'him' in any context. Also we learn how HIM stays so fit!

Tough Love: HIM farts on the entire city and it makes everyone hate the Powerpuff Girls.

Major Competition: Pretty much the exact kind of thing I'd expect Jeff Bennett to voice comes to town, kicks a puppy and gets praised.

Mr. Mojo's Rising: Mojo reveals he is both the Professor's former pet and the technical other parent of the Powerpuff Girls.

Paste Makes Waste: Be careful who you bully in kindergarten because they might eat a radioactive fly and become giant glue monsters.

Ice Sore: It's a hot summer's day and gee whiz, Blossom sure blows!

Bubblevicious: Bubbles is hardcore.

The Bare Facts: Your typical 'no-one's account is fully accurate as they piece together the story' story, but with crayon drawlings and a naked old dude.

Cat Man Do: Evil cat possesses the professor and does evil cat things.

Impeach Fuzz: Fuzzy becomes the perfect mayor. Crime is down 100%, the Powerpuff Girls now get called to catch pigs.

Just Another Manic Mojo: Mojo Jojo's morning routine ft. annoying children.

Mime For A Change: Clown steps into oncoming traffic, gets covered in bleach, causes an environmental disaster and ruins everything.

The Rowdyruff Boys: Rule 63 the episode.

Uh Oh Dynamo: Kaiju vs murder robot. The city loses.

Stuck Up, Up And Away: Spoiled brat tries to buy superpowers, like Batman.

Schoolhouse Rocked: Teenagers who were abandoned in a dump before ever going to school meet a truant officer who becomes the first person to ever care about them, then go to school and get expelled on the very first day.

Collect Her: This is you, you obsessed freaks.

Supper Villain: Man gets sick of pancakes for breakfast and lives out secret supervillain fantasies. (Second most quoted line of the show in my family is here.)

Birthday Bash: Happy birthday, here's some death. Also why the hell is a 5 year old girl in a prison where every single other inmate is a grown man?

Too Pooped To Puff: When completely exhausted from their constant hero work, the girls tell the city to put a toaster in a bathtub full of water.

Beat Your Greens: These kids are so reluctant to eat the only good green vegetable that vegetable aliens arrive to teach them to stop being pussies.

Down n' Dirty: Buttercup refuses to bathe and it's fucking disgusting.

Dream Scheme: In The Sand Man you play as Sophie Grundler, a girl suffering from insomnia. Exhausted and unable to sleep, Sophie wanders into town to discover everyone else has fallen into an eternal sleep. Wait, wrong sand man-

You Snooze You Lose: Mojo falls asleep, loses some schematics and goes completely batshit insane. Then the girls eat gum that was in Junior's mouth earlier. Then probably get sick from Amoeba Boys germs again.

Slave The Day: Billy, who we thought was dead, pledges allegiance to the girls and Blossom yells at him.

Los Dos Mojos: Bubbles is Mojo now. But twice as hardcore.

A Very Special Blossom: Blossom turns to a life of crime.

Daylight Savings: Actual consequences to these small children having to go out at all hours to fight crime.

Mo Job: Mojo and Princess build a gun and shoot children with it.

Pet Feud: The Professor genetically engineers a neopet that eats everything.

Imaginary Fiend: A child's imagination is a dangerous weapon. And may tell the child to set the school on fire.

Cootie Gras: A kid who never bathes decides to play kiss chase. When that grosses people out, he gets used as a dangerous weapon.

The Powerpuff Girls Best Rainy Day Adventure Ever: The Powerpuff Girls play The Powerpuff Girls.

Just Desserts: Man's supervillain fantasy is adopted by his entire family.

Twisted Sister: The girls create a new sister who is severely disabled and then promptly dies.

Cover Up: Security Blankie the episode

Speed Demon: Back To The Future but scarier.

Mojo Jonesin': Mojo deals crack to toddlers

Something's A Ms.: Sedusa has sex with the Mayor so she can steal shit.

Slumbering With The Enemy: Mojo goes on RuPaul's Drag Race and infiltrates a child's sleepover.

Fallen Arches: Old People Fight Club!

The Mane Event: Blossom gets a new haircut and gets bullied. I like her hair like that though.

Town And Out: The Utoniums move to a new town with real world consequences for senseless property damage.

Child Fearing: Mojo babysits and regrets every decision that led him to that moment in life.

Criss Cross Crisis: Mandatory body swap story from hell.

Bubblevision: Bubbles has sudden sight loss issues and gets ripped to shreds for it. Also there are ants.

Bought And Scold: Princess' dad buys the city and she legalises everything, then gets robbed.

Gettin' Twiggy With It: Neglected trailer park kid abuses a hamster.

Cop Out: American Police officer attempts to kill three children. Nobody is surprised.

Three Girls And A Monster: Well, they aren't adopting it, but they aren't murdering it either.

Monkey See, Doggy Two: Everyone's a dog again except the girls, so they can beat the shit out of things still.

Jewel Of The Aisle: Cereal mascot tries to rob diamond.

Super Zeroes: Cosplay 2 electric boogaloo. Also who the hell trusted Blossom with a car?

Candy Is Dandy: What happens when you introduce sugar to children who aren't allowed sugar.

Catastrophe: Don't shove cats up your arse.

Hot Air Buffoon: The Mayor goes into the sky and punches people.

Ploys R' Us: The Professor sleep steals and the girls profit from it.

The Headsucker's Moxy: BRAINS BRAINS IT'S ALRIGHT, I'LL EAT THEIR BRAINS TIL THEY'RE ZOMBIFIED

Equal Fights: The Powerpuff Girls get brainwashed by a TERF.

Powerprof.: Embarrassing dad becomes superhero just to spend time with embarrassed children.

Moral Decay: Buttercup steals teeth and sells them on the black market.

Meet The Beat Alls: Mojo, Fuzzy, Princess and HIM form a band and live in a yellow submarine.

Him Diddle Riddle: HIM canonically has the power to end the entire world with a flick of his wrist but instead spends his time making the girls solve riddles to inconvenience them for shits, giggles and not having customers Karen their way out of paying for flapjacks.

Film Flam: Fake director tries to take advantage of impressionable young girls and it takes their dad in drag to stop him.

All Chalked Up: Butterfly HIM teaches Bubbles art therapy and then brings the therapy to life.

Get Back Jojo: Back To The Future again

Members Only: Big manly men have their masculinity threatened by little girls, then a giant dick joke from space voiced by Mr Krabs kills everyone.

Nano Of The North: Tiny robots eat your clothes

Stray Bullet: Squirrel with huge nuts becomes super squirrel after small child force feeds him chemicals

Forced Kin: Mojo has beef with some shiny silver dude

Knock It Off: Dexter's estranged uncle or something comes to town, makes a shittonne of artificial children to sell for profit and many of the children die.

Helter Shelter: Bubbles kidnaps a baby whale

Power Lunch: Teenagers with terrible diet have stomach issues.

Superfriends: New kid in town falls victim to peer pressure.

Keen On Keane: Girls, seriously, have you not learned your lesson about setting your dad up on dates with random women yet?

Not So Awesome Blossom: Blossom has an anxiety attack and loses all self confidence.

Power-Noia: The girls eat cheese before bed and have weird nightmares.

Monstra-City: Segregation is right.

Shut The Pup Up: The girls consider beating a dog to death.

Toast Of The Town: Babysitting an old guy who wants toast.

Divide And Conquer: A glorified maths lesson featuring amoebas.

Burglar Alarmed: The girls try to silently deal with a burglar because daddy is tired.

Shotgun Wedding: Fuzzy tries to marry Professor Utonium, then has sex with a pile of mud.

Save Mojo: Vegans ruin everything.

Substitute Creature: Ms Keane is sick and the girls learn they're racist against green people.

The Boys Are Back In Town: Oh yeah rule 63 is back and spikier.

Pee Pee G's: Mojo breaks into the girls' house and pisses on their bed. He faces absolutely no consequences for this.

Boy Toys: Boys don't like girls, boys like cars and weapons.

Seed No Evil: Frozen caveman steals sunflower seeds. This one feels like a really shit fever dream.

City Of Clipsville: The show runners take the absolute piss out of every fanfic writer in the fandom.

Lying Around The House: A lie gains sentience and fucks shit up.

Bubble Boy: Bubbles steals Boomer's clothes, identity and family.

A Documentary: Guy stalks children and tries to record videos of them.

Girls Gone Mild: Karens ruin everything. Again.

See Me, Feel Me, Gnomey: Jack Black a gnome creates communism through the power of music

Curses: The girls learn how to swear.

Bang For Your Buck: Kids compete in a life or death struggle to earn enough money for ice cream.

Silent Treatment: Silent movie kidnaps man and steals his voice.

Sweet 'n' Sour: Plushies rob entire city and get away with it because they're cute. Also they hate children.

Prime Mates: Brainless monkey ruins everything. Just like Twitter.

Coupe D'Etat: Sentient car is a homewrecker.

Makes Zen To Me: Buttercup joins a peace cult.

Say Uncle: The girls adopt a sasquatch and Utonium does not recognise his own brother.

Reeking Havoc: How do you fight a giant fart? Asking for a friend.

Live & Let Dynamo: Kaiju Robot is back and is committing crimes for fun.

Mo' Linguish: Mojo teaches a class at an adult education centre. Sadly it is not street dancing for self defence.

Oops, I Did It Again: Normal little girl AU

A Made Up Story: In which makeup is evil

Little Miss Interprets: Bubbles ruins a surprise party

Night Mayor: Another weird cheese dream but this time it's the Mayor dreaming about having relations with pickles

Custody Battle: HIM and Mojo have a messy custody battle in the middle of Townsville and both lose.

City Of Nutsville: Bubbles swallows a bee and squirrels kill everyone.

Aspirations: Sedusa takes advantage of a group of teenagers who have been abandoned by their mothers and also never gotten laid while also turning them into criminal masterminds.

That's Not My Baby: The girls find an abandoned baby and decide caring for it will convince their dad they're ready for a hamster

Simian Says: Mojo takes over the show

Sun Scream: PSA: Wear sunscreen.

City Of Frownsville: Man with terrible depression develops machine that cures his depression by giving it to everyone else

West In Pieces: Back To The Future 3, the wild west one

Crazy Mixed Up Puffs: Oh god they've fused

Mizzen In Action: Pirates of the Caribbean but less interesting

Roughing It Up: The Professor takes his kids on a camping trip and becomes rival dads with Fuzzy

What's The Big Idea?: The girls are made giant and it's a whole mess.

Nuthin' Special: Buttercup has no unique abilities. Any she had before are no longer unique.

Neighbour Hood: Children's TV show demands money.

I See A Funny Cartoon In Your Future: Gypsy and goose steal things along to a terrible rhyming narration.

Octi-Gone: Bubbles holds a fancy dinner party hostage to solve the mystery of the murder of her plushie, the one that told her to burn things.

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starsandthorn · 1 year

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wait some of y'all don't think that death was narratively satisfying??? he spent the entire season rotting away and sloughing off of (and OUT of) bodies he was not meant to be in, grasping at a life he had outlived because he was unwilling to let go, literally got ripped out of the HEART of the world he tried so hard to destroy and then that world summoned up a 5 second rainstorm to boil him alive and burn away his facade of humanity so he could grovel at the feet of a witch and then get stomped into nothing by the denizens of the world, symbolizing the people he hurt by enforcing the covens, people ostracized and punished for not conforming, and the titan he used to manipulate people with by claiming he knew its will. what's not clicking

#personal stuff #toh #toh spoilers #LITERALLY. he wanted so badly to be the hero so for him to die quietly and pathetically with no evidence and no witnesses is so satisfying #''ooh but he didn't explain his motives'' WHO CARES #we the audience got enough of his motives to understand the idea. and honestly the people he's hurt don't NEED to know the motives #because he was utterly unrepentant to the end and was never going to change.#he went to his grave trying to emotionally manipulate a teenager and failing.#like the collector explaining themself was because they genuinely were misguided and hurt and were capable of changing #and they DID change when given support and love and care #belos was. literally never going to do that LMAO #god. and like. the magic he used this episode reminded me so much of rot and mold #and mold needs sufficient nutrients to feed off of! so for him to just quietly rot away into nothing #with nothing and no one and no palismen to feed off of. yea <3 feels good feels organic

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iamthekarmapolice · 11 months

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so like am i reading too much into this or is the cannibalism in yellowjackets a metaphor for the specific ways women hurt each other as a way to survive in harsh unforgiving environments that fundamentally dont seem to want them there

#granted im only on s1 and theres not actually been any cannibalism so far other than the first episode #but yeah this show is making me a little bit insane #it reminds me of the best and worst parts of my school which was all-girls #now im in engineering and im the only woman on my team and i fucking miss being in a predominantly female space so badly sometimes #yes there was a lot of cannibalism. but also people noticed when you were sad and you could tell them why #and no one was explaining code to you that you yourself have written #yellowjackets

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hideyseek · 3 months

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SHEN WEI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!! ! !

#IM GOING TO EXPLODE OH NO #OH THIS WAS EPISODE 38 AND NOT 37 THAT EXPLAINS A LOT ABOUT HOW FAST THINGS STARTED GOING BADLY #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #oh god #hes gonna die isnt he ..............#hidey watches guardian

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leatherbookmark · 5 months

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idk maybe it makes me a child or Someone With Shit Media Literacy, but i feel like when people discuss fictional events that were good or bad writing, they often look to general fiction tropes rather than what makes sense for the individual story? like, oh, well, this is a [genre] story, and in these, it's either X or Y, so it's going to be either X or Y. or: this character technically could count as a [character archetype], so obviously they only have one very predictable ending. what wonderful, emotionally moving writing!

and like. are we writing stories, or producing products that check off all the most common boxes on the Successful [Genre] Story list? this is not to say that you can never kill off your mentors/father figures, or that your protagonist should never fail miserably in this or that point of the story -- sometimes it really is the most fitting and sensible solution! sometimes leaving a character alive would undermine or muddle up the message, if there is one, or it would simply make it more difficult for the writer. and it's fine. but when your reason for this or that writing choice is not "because it makes the most sense" but rather "because that's what happens in other stories", it's, uh, not good writing at all. it's barely any writing, really!

#shrimp thoughts #i still can't understand how people not only expected izzy to die but also found it satisfying. like. you have GOT to be kidding me #you have GOT to be closet izzy haters who thought that saying 'oh i was so moved it was so beautiful' would like. legitimize your #'grr grr stupid baka character want him to DIE'#it must have been said at least 49857 times by people way better at words than me but it would've been cheap and frustrating if it was #izzy ~redeeming himself~ to save ed and doing a very last minute u turn from the path of Villainy. but he was not a villain he was barely #even an antagonist. and he was first and foremost and accepted part of the crew for (over?) HALF OF THE SHOW by now #and saying that he had to die precisely because he 'redeemed himself' (hello hello i'm starting to hate this word yknow) doesn't make it #better. if anything: worse.#and the argument that izzy had to die because he's said it himself -- babes. what. izzy is a character. in a VERY badly written episode if #he has to explain HIMSELF why he's dying and why it's necessary. like. you can see it right. you can see it. right?#post sponsored by me once again letting the curiosity win and finding out the sad way that i made the right call by unfollowing someone #for the grave sin of not liking my blorbo back in 2022

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mrpsychokiller · 8 months

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i keep having embarrassingly deeper-than-they-should feelings about caboose that im not sure what to do about, with how i feel like i relate in a pretty genuine and sweet way to him in an autistic level and i do feel like reading him that way makes real sense but im just incapable of feeling very good about it when its very very clear caboose's neurodivergent esque behavior is applied exclusively to make the butt of the joke off how stupid he is. i care about him a lot as a character but i mostly just wanna rip him off r-slur-loving rooster teeth's hands and handle him with a minimum level of respect

#i dunno i feel about bad about it like if i even acknowledge my reading of him it comes off badly when once again hes the dumb one #going off topic onto a tangent i think i just yearn for a fictional representation of autism that isnt just easy and palatable #like there are lots and lots of autistic and autistic coded and autistic read/head cannoned characters out there #but it feels like its always just. nice character whos very nerdy about a subject or is kinda weird or awkward at times #its always just this ''high functional'' kind of autism where the proof theyre autistic are a few traits here and there #there just arent characters who stutter and mumble and get lost with words and sound weird and have weird voices #and say genuinely weird things in genuinely inappropriate times. who genuinely come off as weird or dumb or childish #who struggle with simple things or dont get concepts or instructions or things said at them #autism that isnt quirky or always fun or always endearing or easy to deal with or easy to dismiss #i cant think of a single character in media who i relate with in an autistic level in how my autism actually feels beyond the superficial #and i think thats why i get a genuine comfort in caboose of all things #in how unapologetically and undeniably weird and kinda dumb and kinda childish he comes off #and it isnt always nice and it annoys and troubles the people around him and of course himself beyond a way he can control #i get touched by the moments here and there when people actually treat him well #when tucker takes some time to gently explain to him that church isnt coming back.#and when hes given a sincerely emotional moment to say goodbye to church and well as that one episode of season 14 #or generally when characters are nice to him or talk in ways he can understand better #i dunno i just really do like him #which i guess just backfires when it feels specially hurtful when hes called dumb and stupid and is hated and threatened #and condescend upon and treated as useless and incompetent and just a burden the others need to take care of #mannnnn i hate rooster teeth #🧃

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true-blue-sonic · 7 months

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If Eggman Nega created Silver that would mean Triple-S were all created by Robotniks in some capacity(Shadow was created by Gerald and Sonic was created by Eggman in the very first American Sonic comic)

Oh yes, that was the odd one with Kintobor who turned evil because his machine exploded while he was holding a rotting egg and Sonic being brown at first before randomly turning blue when he broke the sound barrier for the first time, while having like a dozen sisters and a dad who drowned in toxic waste, right? Thank god that's not canon, what an odd story😅😂 Which does mean Sonic was not created by Eggman, though. Currently what is said on the topic is that they've just met before Sonic 1 already and had been fighting each other for a while when that game's events happened. So I guess the only way wherein Eggman 'made' Sonic was through making him the planet-renowned hero he is now, though even if Eggman had not been around, I am certain Sonic would still have been helping others and adventuring all over.

Still, I find it intriguing indeed that all three male hedgehogs are so intrinsically interlinked with the Robotnik bloodline. Shadow was created by Gerald for the good of Maria and humanity, whereas Sonic and Silver fight with Geralds' descendants to protect said humanity. And even more intriguing to me is that for Silver, this might not have been planned originally, since he has nothing to do with Eggman Nega in '06. But then again, Rivals and '06 were released so closely together, maybe it always was the plan to have him become nemeses with Nega because they all knew '06's events would be wiped from the timeline. I do not think we will ever get a clear answer for this topic. Regardless, it makes me wonder what Gerald would think about it when things had not yet gone amiss on the Ark and he was still sane. I figure he would be quite horrified this is going to be his legacy, but in the same vein also hopeful that Sonic and Silver will be able to protect the world from Eggman and Eggman Nega.

#in today's episode of Tumblr‚ Blue explains the very strange American ex-lore very badly lmao #I might be getting my wires crossed here tbh but I am 100% sure there's *a* background story out there where Sonic has a bunch of sisters #and hibernates and participates in races and stuff because he likes being fast and met Kintobor and helped around his lab and turned blue #yeah no I am quite happy Adventure 1 just put the Japanese lore in place instead #they even found a good way to connect the 'Robotnik' and 'Eggman' names!

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neonscandal · 2 years

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9 Anime to Watch if You Want to Feel Like 👇🏾

Special October Edition

While I was going to keep going with a theme of 6's for the month (still may), I figure one list in the spirit of my usual recs should be fine. Especially when you have less than 20 days to get your fill of spooky horror anime. With these recommendations, there will be blood! Below are a few short series/movies to give a visual to whatever goes bump in the night. Whether rooted in the supernatural or science fiction, these recommendations will be bloody and, at times, hopeless. While there's a blanket warning for blood and gore for the below, most if not all are intended for mature audiences so there may be additional triggers.

I included 🚩 for anything that may have content that includes or alludes to SA or uncomfortable situations therein for reference.

🚩 Deadman Wonderland (series + ovas)

Filed under: "That first episode tho"

Not sure what a 9th grader could do to deserve what happens in the first episode of Deadman but, suffice to say, we spend the whole season wondering. MC Ganta stands trial for a crime he didn't commit and forced to "live" out a sentence at a private prison that's been turned into a bloody amusement park where prisoners are used as... live entertainment for the desensitized masses. If that weren't already inhumane enough, the neon sign of a prison is actually hiding something much more sinister within its walls, something, in fact, it can just barely contain..

Sub, Dub | Funimation, Crunchyroll

🚩 Parasyte: The Maxim (series)

Body horror is an obvious byproduct of what happens when aliens begin to take human hosts. More jarring is the fact that these parasites seamlessly blend in with the rest of the population to better walk and feed among us. This series follows one meek man who happens to escape total control but cannot escape detection by other parasites. Is he and his now symbiotic companion going to be enough to eradicate this growing infestation?

Sub, Dub | Hulu, Prime Video, HiDive, Crunchyroll

🚩 Gantz (series + movie)

What if the afterlife was simultaneously woven with the land of the living? I'll start by saying that this phenomena isn't satisfactorily explained but you won't care because there's so many other unnerving things that happen in tandem with this discovery that you're just along for the ride. While the main objective of those selected by Gantz is to complete missions targeting other worldly beings.. the show also takes care to demonstrate how callous and grotesque humans can be as well.

Sub, Dub | Funimation (anime), Netflix (0)

🚩 Junji Ito Collection (series)

Not every episode in this anthology will scare you, per se, but each individual story line is bound to yield disgust and/or discomfort. You've likely seen the meme comparisons of Junji Ito personally being the polar opposite of Hayao Miyazaki... which translates directly to their corresponding work as well. Story lines encompass the occult, the twisted and the revolting.

Sub, Dub | Crunchyroll, Funimation

🚩 The Future Diary (series)

Filed under: "I love the kind of women that will actually just kill me"

My Explaining Anime BADLY description would simply be Supernatural "Battle Royale" but the main story is much more sinister than that. With that reference in mind, however, expect gore and the persisting sense that there is no one who main character Yuki can really trust. If he wants to survive, that is. The... situation the main characters find themselves in is one layer of the story but the heavy hitters involved all have their own reasons for playing along. For a timid kid like Yuki, he never really sees it coming. Doesn't take long for him to become wise in the way of the world as he fumbles his way through.

Sub, Dub | Hulu, Crunchyroll, Funimation

Kabaneri of the Iron Fortress (series + summary movies)

Filed under: "I love the kind of women that will actually just kill me"

One thing about me? In the horror genre, I love zombies which is a pretty accurate definition for kabane which have forced the last of humanity to take shelter behind walls and move about using trains that connect different clans (it's giving Snowpiercer?). I've seen people make the comparison between Kabaneri and Attack on Titan which.. not sure I see aside from the eating humans thing and the uncharacteristically beautiful animation despite the genre. But if that comparison will get you to tune in, let me also add that it is morsel sized.

Sub, Dub | Crunchyroll, Funimation, Prime Video, Netflix

Another (series)

I don't care that I just recommended it on this list. I recommended it irl yesterday and when a few of my rec's weren't available to stream, figured this was a perfect replacement.

Imagine being the new kid in a strange town and seeing things that no one dares to speak of? You've spoken to the lonely girl who seems to haunt your class but, as no one else acknowledges her, you start to question whether it's all in your head. As this question persists, you come to realize that there was a reason some things went without being said except it's too late. So begins the Calamity which is guaranteed to gruesomely take the lives of countless people connected to the cursed 3rd class of 9th year. For an animated series, it deliciously builds up suspense but, more than that, is hard to stop watching. I stayed up until 4:30A finishing this series the first time I watched it because you'll find that you too need to know the root of the creepy mystery.

Sub | Crunchyroll

🚩 Seoul Station (movie)

So when I say I love zombies.. it's no surprise that this movie would find its way on this list. The movie earns a spot for a few reasons. 1) it's a prequel to Train to Busan; 2) the poignancy of the beginning touting the need for universal welfare while the person advocating for it literally ignores the plight of the unhoused population which causes a ripple effect and continues throughout the movie; 3) it's an underdog story. This is the only media I can recall that focuses on the lower class in this way and at first I didn't like the idea of stigmatizing the houseless but the message is actually buried in the fact that the scourge of a virus spreads exponentially because many of the tertiary support characters regard the unhoused so inhumanely. As such, they don't take heed as monsters begin to horde. Overall, it's a hopeless story (as many zombie stories are) but compounded by the fact that the main characters were struggling to thrive before the outbreak. So you have this need to survive the apocalypse while simultaneously combatting classism and other unresolved personal issues from your past. How does one endure? The movie isn't especially gorey but what adds a bit of unsettling-ness to the overall visual is the erratic animation of those who aren't infected. Or perhaps they are animated with such care to illustrate every single breath, every minute movement. You'll have to see for yourself and tell me what you think!

Sub | Freevee

Higurashi: When They Cry (series + ovas)

Background: The first time I tried watching this series, my friends and I were immediately put off by the saccharinely sweet voices and cloying illustration style and we didn't get far into the episode or bother to understand what we were watching.

Getting to the Point: As someone who can't help but finish what I start, when I returned to the series, those same attributes are exactly what makes what transpires so unsettling. Sickeningly innocent characters are offset by such dissonant (and cyclical) violence. Get through the Watanagashi festival and go beyond that sweet veneer because hospitality isn't the only thing that cultivates... small town charm✨ in this horror mystery series. While this is a bit of a longer recommendation (i.e. Gou is a continuation of prequel OVA's).. seek out what you'd like and let me know what you think. If this doesn't pique your interest, I included some ‼️ guidance for watching a bit below where to find the anime and an... ⚠️ indirect spoiler further down but only if you really want to know.

Sub/Dub | Funimation, Crunchyroll, Hulu

‼️ Guidance for viewing, pay attention to the calendar dates as you’re watching because the timeline is inky.

⚠️ Indirect spoiler? My Explaining Anime Badly description of this show uncharacteristically requires reference from live action media. This show is as if "Reservoir Dogs" Quentin Tarantino era directed “Midsommar”. With a component (I won't say of what) of “The Future Diary” anime sprinkled in. Also, my initial last rec was Corpse Party: Tortured Souls but HiDive recently removed it T-T

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laurelwinchester · 2 years

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I hope Avery is just an apparently moronic stepdad but the way he broke into that couple's tent and searched everything makes me really suspicious of him. It's weird enough that Emily stalked people she saw for the first time, but why is he acting like this?

well he does live with two women who are admittedly into true crime podcasts so maybe they've just turned him into a citizen sleuth.

honestly though i haven't really gotten any super suspicious vibes from him so far. i'm definitely not discounting the possibility that's there's a lot more going on with him because everyone in this show has secrets but to me he more reads like a well meaning dude who is trying real hard. maybe a little too hard.

emily is a typical 2022 teenager. she's nosy, even to her own detriment, she's into podcasts, she's obsessed with her phone, she's craving independence, and she has an overprotective dad. she also has strong opinions, a stubborn streak, and has inherited her mother's love of mysteries and her father's drive to help people.

and avery seems focused on bonding with her. which is hard! it can be hard to bond with a teenager as a step parent. it's even harder to bond with a kid working at asserting their independence the way emily is. it's obvious he hasn't been a parent long, he's new to the game and he will make mistakes, but he desperately wants that connection and he doesn't want her to push him away. so he's on this camping trip with her without carla, he's helping her with her podcast, he's asking her to teach him alanis morissette lyrics, he's going along with her into the woods to search for the weird and obnoxious young couple (who i have to imagine has been annoying everyone around them) even though he's wondering if he should be suspicious of them. he is fully determined to be the cool stepdad.

we're only two episodes in so there is plenty of time for him to be unmasked as king of the douchebags and i would not be at all surprised if he was - mostly because henry ian cusick is so good at playing shady. but so far...idk he surprisingly seems mostly harmless.

#i have to say i'm surprised by how genuine avery seems #i really expected him to be a douche given how beau talks about him #what surprised me was in episode one when beau called emily #avery saw her phone ringing and he saw that it was beau calling and he actively encouraged her to take the call #it was a little thing but it stuck out to me #there's some real issues between beau and avery but they both love emily and avery at least seems to get that she comes first #i'm really fascinated to meet carla tbh because she seems to be at the center of this and i'm curious to know what went down #i'm starting to wonder if she really did leave beau for avery #it would explain the struggle bus beau's on and how badly avery wants emily to like him #though if she did i.............have some questions just from......you know a shallow standpoint #big sky #big sky spoilers #asks #anon

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chitcharlie · 2 years

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My mind is in a very specific place lately but one thing I could say is that I genuinely don't want to die anymore

#at least when I don't have any episodes #i am sad i am lonely i feel like a burden #but i also want to see where life still could bring me #i want to see if i still have a chance in this life #if my mess of a brain full of disorders can heal #and if i have to do this alone hell i will do this alone #figuring out what the fuck is wrong with me gave me a lot of perspective and if you keep reading this #please research personality disorders when people give you the trust and let you know they have any.#try to understand and adapt with them if you really care about the person #nothing is worse than trusting somebody with your diagnosis only for it to be ommited completely #and remember diagnosis is not an excuse to act like a dick but might explain a lot why somebody acted the way they acted #and if you have a personality disorder #you have no idea how badly i would love to hug you all #we deserve being understood we deserve patience we deserve people who would care #and we deserve to heal properly #and if somebody does not want to understand honestly fuck them

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h0neydrizzle · 19 days

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Hey so like, making fun of people who are experiencing delusions is bad ok don't do it

#so tired of seeing ppl be like #“oh they had delusions its ok for me to talk badly about this thing they said to me that made me feel weird”#discomfort =/= wrong or illegal #if something doesnt make sense ask what they mean and if they get actually weird and abusive after i would block them #but if someone is experiencing an entire episode you should prolly consider reporting that to tumblr and explain ur worried about their MH #because yall are always so comfy until someone with the disability or disorder symptoms that make u uncomfy show up

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anothermonikan · 2 months

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hate that the character I dislike most in G5 is the one I have the strongest headcanons about. Talking about Hitch Trailblazer yeah

Look I don't like this pony, I have not forgotten he's supposed to be 'The Cop' of the group, I am happy they've been leaning on it less because some of the earlier MYM and TYT episodes are borderline unwatchable because they lean so much into 'oh he's a GOOD cop :)) He loves following rules and keeping ponies safe!' and it's just a little bit disappointing after everything that the G5 movie was supposed to be about that they just let Hitch go back to being a cop and not only that but then they put so much emphasis on how "good" of a cop he is in the show up until like. Sparky's introduction. He's kind of just the dragon dad character now, I can't remember the last time him being sheriff was even mentioned in TYT, I would complain about how inconsistent that makes his character but I honestly would just prefer if they didn't lean on the good cop thing ever again so I won't

BUT. Not ignoring that but it's irrelevant to what this post is really about, um. Hitch has to have some sort of blood relation with Fluttershy right?? Like okay here is my evidence:

Appearance wise, Fluttershy's family has a pretty consistent thing with the colours yellow and green

Like I know none of them have green manes specifically but colour throughout family in MLP is weird. This is probably my most flimsy piece of evidence BUT I think it's interesting when in conjunction with these two other things:

Hitch can talk to animals and

2. I don't really understand what they're going for with the whole cutiemark magic thing in G5 but like. All of the mane cast ponies have different elements that align with their cutiemarks or something and you know what Hitch's is? Kindness. And it's the only one that has a G4 counterpart with an Element of Harmony

I only really started putting this together in my head after the second season 2 episode of TYT when they say their cutiemark magic things out loud and I was like. huh Kindness. like Fluttershy. and then the piece started to fall together in my head and I was like. Oh! Okay! I really hope that's intentional!

#sorry that I can't talk about Hitch without like a whole paragraph explaining that I don't like him and why.#thus alienating like the entire target audience for this probably. I have little hater disease. yeah it is terminal thanks for asking #It could be worse I used to not be able to even stand him being in an episode because of how badly they leaned into the cop thing #I can tolerate him now that he's just. The one with the dragon. most of the time #If this turns out to be intentional and is confirmed I'm gonna get a good grade in media literacy.#which is normal to want and possible to achieve #asdhsdhhsdf #I'm pretty sure that's not actually what media literacy means so I actually get a point deducted for that one #I just cannot think of the word I mean...nap time for me now ehe #MLP #MLP ANG #MLP G5 #MLP TYT #MLP MYM #Android.txt

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mostlysignssomeportents · 2 days

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Red Lobster was killed by private equity, not Endless Shrimp

For the rest of May, my bestselling solarpunk utopian novel THE LOST CAUSE (2023) is available as a $2.99, DRM-free ebook!

A decade ago, a hedge fund had an improbable viral comedy hit: a 294-page slide deck explaining why Olive Garden was going out of business, blaming the failure on too many breadsticks and insufficiently salted pasta-water:

https://www.sec.gov/Archives/edgar/data/940944/000092189514002031/ex991dfan14a06297125_091114.pdf

Everyone loved this story. As David Dayen wrote for Salon, it let readers "mock that silly chain restaurant they remember from their childhoods in the suburbs" and laugh at "the silly hedge fund that took the time to write the world’s worst review":

https://www.salon.com/2014/09/17/the_real_olive_garden_scandal_why_greedy_hedge_funders_suddenly_care_so_much_about_breadsticks/

But – as Dayen wrote at the time, the hedge fund that produced that slide deck, Starboard Value, was not motivated by dissatisfaction with bread-sticks. They were "activist investors" (finspeak for "rapacious assholes") with a giant stake in Darden Restaurants, Olive Garden's parent company. They wanted Darden to liquidate all of Olive Garden's real-estate holdings and declare a one-off dividend that would net investors a billion dollars, while literally yanking the floor out from beneath Olive Garden, converting it from owner to tenant, subject to rent-shocks and other nasty surprises.

They wanted to asset-strip the company, in other words ("asset strip" is what they call it in hedge-fund land; the mafia calls it a "bust-out," famous to anyone who watched the twenty-third episode of The Sopranos):

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bust_Out

Starboard didn't have enough money to force the sale, but they had recently engineered the CEO's ouster. The giant slide-deck making fun of Olive Garden's food was just a PR campaign to help it sell the bust-out by creating a narrative that they were being activists* to save this badly managed disaster of a restaurant chain.

*assholes

Starboard was bent on eviscerating Darden like a couple of entrail-maddened dogs in an elk carcass:

https://web.archive.org/web/20051220005944/http://alumni.media.mit.edu/~solan/dogsinelk/

They had forced Darden to sell off another of its holdings, Red Lobster, to a hedge-fund called Golden Gate Capital. Golden Gate flogged all of Red Lobster's real estate holdings for $2.1 billion the same day, then pissed it all away on dividends to its shareholders, including Starboard. The new landlords, a Real Estate Investment Trust, proceeded to charge so much for rent on those buildings Red Lobster just flogged that the company's net earnings immediately dropped by half.

Dayen ends his piece with these prophetic words:

Olive Garden and Red Lobster may not be destinations for hipster Internet journalists, and they have seen revenue declines amid stagnant middle-class wages and increased competition. But they are still profitable businesses. Thousands of Americans work there. Why should they be bled dry by predatory investors in the name of “shareholder value”? What of the value of worker productivity instead of the financial engineers?

Flash forward a decade. Today, Dayen is editor-in-chief of The American Prospect, one of the best sources of news about private equity looting in the world. Writing for the Prospect, Luke Goldstein picks up Dayen's story, ten years on:

https://prospect.org/economy/2024-05-22-raiding-red-lobster/

It's not pretty. Ten years of being bled out on rents and flipped from one hedge fund to another has killed Red Lobster. It just shuttered 50 restaurants and declared Chapter 11 bankruptcy. Ten years hasn't changed much; the same kind of snark that was deployed at the news of Olive Garden's imminent demise is now being hurled at Red Lobster.

Instead of dunking on free bread-sticks, Red Lobster's grave-dancers are jeering at "Endless Shrimp," a promotional deal that works exactly how it sounds like it would work. Endless Shrimp cost the chain $11m.

Which raises a question: why did Red Lobster make this money-losing offer? Are they just good-hearted slobs? Can't they do math?

Or, you know, was it another hedge-fund, bust-out scam?

Here's a hint. The supplier who provided Red Lobster with all that shrimp is Thai Union. Thai Union also owns Red Lobster. They bought the chain from Golden Gate Capital, last seen in 2014, holding a flash-sale on all of Red Lobster's buildings, pocketing billions, and cutting Red Lobster's earnings in half.

Red Lobster rose to success – 700 restaurants nationwide at its peak – by combining no-frills dining with powerful buying power, which it used to force discounts from seafood suppliers. In response, the seafood industry consolidated through a wave of mergers, turning into a cozy cartel that could resist the buyer power of Red Lobster and other major customers.

This was facilitated by conservation efforts that limited the total volume of biomass that fishers were allowed to extract, and allocated quotas to existing companies and individual fishermen. The costs of complying with this "catch management" system were high, punishingly so for small independents, bearably so for large conglomerates.

Competition from overseas fisheries drove consolidation further, as countries in the global south were blocked from implementing their own conservation efforts. US fisheries merged further, seeking economies of scale that would let them compete, largely by shafting fishermen and other suppliers. Today's Alaskan crab fishery is dominated by a four-company cartel; in the Pacific Northwest, most fish goes through a single intermediary, Pacific Seafood.

These dominant actors entered into illegal collusive arrangements with one another to rig their markets and further immiserate their suppliers, who filed antitrust suits accusing the companies of operating a monopsony (a market with a powerful buyer, akin to a monopoly, which is a market with a powerful seller):

https://www.classaction.org/news/pacific-seafood-under-fire-for-allegedly-fixing-prices-paid-to-dungeness-crabbers-in-pacific-northwest

Golden Gate bought Red Lobster in the midst of these fish wars, promising to right its ship. As Goldstein points out, that's the same promise they made when they bought Payless shoes, just before they destroyed the company and flogged it off to Alden Capital, the hedge fund that bought and destroyed dozens of America's most beloved newspapers:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/10/16/sociopathic-monsters/#all-the-news-thats-fit-to-print

Under Golden Gate's management, Red Lobster saw its staffing levels slashed, so diners endured longer wait times to be seated and served. Then, in 2020, they sold the company to Thai Union, the company's largest supplier (a transaction Goldstein likens to a Walmart buyout of Procter and Gamble).

Thai Union continued to bleed Red Lobster, imposing more cuts and loading it up with more debts financed by yet another private equity giant, Fortress Investment Group. That brings us to today, with Thai Union having moved a gigantic amount of its own product through a failing, debt-loaded subsidiary, even as it lobbies for deregulation of American fisheries, which would let it and its lobbying partners drain American waters of the last of its depleted fish stocks.

Dayen's 2020 must-read book Monopolized describes the way that monopolies proliferate, using the US health care industry as a case-study:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/01/29/fractal-bullshit/#dayenu

After deregulation allowed the pharma sector to consolidate, it acquired pricing power of hospitals, who found themselves gouged to the edge of bankruptcy on drug prices. Hospitals then merged into regional monopolies, which allowed them to resist pharma pricing power – and gouge health insurance companies, who saw the price of routine care explode. So the insurance companies gobbled each other up, too, leaving most of us with two or fewer choices for health insurance – even as insurance prices skyrocketed, and our benefits shrank.

Today, Americans pay more for worse healthcare, which is delivered by health workers who get paid less and work under worse conditions. That's because, lacking a regulator to consolidate patients' interests, and strong unions to consolidate workers' interests, patients and workers are easy pickings for those consolidated links in the health supply-chain.

That's a pretty good model for understanding what's happened to Red Lobster: monopoly power and monopsony power begat more monopolies and monoposonies in the supply chain. Everything that hasn't consolidated is defenseless: diners, restaurant workers, fishermen, and the environment. We're all fucked.

Decent, no-frills family restaurant are good. Great, even. I'm not the world's greatest fan of chain restaurants, but I'm also comfortably middle-class and not struggling to afford to give my family a nice night out at a place with good food, friendly staff and reasonable prices. These places are easy pickings for looters because the people who patronize them have little power in our society – and because those of us with more power are easily tricked into sneering at these places' failures as a kind of comeuppance that's all that's due to tacky joints that serve the working class.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/05/23/spineless/#invertebrates

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wilwheaton · 25 days

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In a new interview with the New Yorker ahead of his 70th birthday on Monday, the comedian explained his theory about why there’s no “funny stuff” to watch on TV anymore. “Nothing really affects comedy,�� he said, “People always need it. They need it so badly and they don’t get it.” Instead of getting sitcoms like M*A*S*H, The Mary Tyler Moore Show, and All in the Family, audiences miss out, he said, as a “result of the extreme left and P.C. crap, and people worrying so much about offending other people.” [...] A look back at some of his earlier comments on a similar subject adds some context, if not clarity. In 2015, Seinfeld sat down for an episode of The Herd with Colin Cowherd podcast, where he explained his aversion to performing stand-up on college campuses. “I don’t play colleges, but I hear a lot of people tell me, ‘Don't go near colleges. They’re so PC,’” he said on the show. After giving an example of his teenage daughter using the word “sexist,” he concluded that young people “just want to use these words: ‘That’s racist’; 'That’s sexist’; ‘That’s prejudice.’ They don’t know what they’re talking about.”

Jerry Seinfeld Draws Right-Wing Praise for Comments on ‘Extreme Left’

This is such a bummer. Tell me you’re a privileged, entitled, myopic Boomer without telling me you’re a privileged, entitled, myopic Boomer.

It’s interesting to me that he says these legendary sit-coms, none of which were cruel, punching down, or hurtful, but were actually satirizing power, celebrating women, changing societal norms through representation, and using comedy to do it all, wouldn’t exist if “the extreme left” had anything to do with it.

Umm. Who does he think created these shows? And is he really that ignorant? Has this guy never read a single interview with Norman Lear? Or literally anyone in the cast of Mary Tyler Moore? I mean. Come on, man!

Teenagers and college students don’t know what they’re talking about when they tell a privileged, entitled, multimillionaire Boomer that his “jokes” can be hurtful, and maybe he could use his tremendous talent to do comedy that is just as funny without being hurtful. Okay. Got it. Keep saying that, and see how far it gets you, buddy.

Hey, Jerry Seinfeld: when blue checks on Twitter are celebrating you being a dick, it’s not because you’re so funny and such a brilliant comic; it’s because they love how you’re validating what garbage they are. You can’t see that, or don’t care, and that’s such a huge bummer.

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cupid-styles · 3 months

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Oh fuck tattoorry piercing his girl’s nipples would be so hot specially with how much she loves humiliation that entire interaction would be so sexually charged

this took me FOREVER but I hope you enjoy!!!!

part of the tattoorry/plugrry world

word count: 3k

content warnings: piercings (mentions of needles), spicy but no smut

masterlist | talk to me

. . .

"Wait, you're being serious?"

Harry huffs out a laugh, sticking his chopsticks in the to-go container of veggie lo mein. "Of course I'm being serious. Why would I lie about that, dovie?"

His response, though not meant to make her feel bad, makes her shrug, a warm blush blooming over the expanse of her cheeks. She stuffs another bite of dumpling in her mouth, chewing it thoughtfully to save her from further embarrassment in front of her boyfriend.

"Don't feel bad," he murmurs, his large palm finding the space between her shoulders, rubbing her sweatshirt-clad skin comfortingly. Her eyes stay glued to the television in front of them, where they're watching the newest episode of Ru-Paul's Drag Race per Y/N's request. (She's never watched it before and Jo, the receptionist at St. Mark's Social, told her she had to. Y/N's been steadily binging it for weeks. Harry pretends like he doesn't love it, but he's secretly just as invested.)

"Dove, look at me," he sighs, placing his food on the coffee table. She does, positioning herself to face him and flittering her eyes up to his face. He looks tired, but they both are. It's been a long week of work and school — however, Y/N was able to get an interview for the bookstore on campus, which ended up causing her a lot of stress and anxiety. It ultimately went well and they said they'd be getting back to her soon. Even if it wasn't the bookstore she wanted to work at, it was still a source of income that would hopefully replenish some of her savings and help her pay rent and bills.

"I shouldn't have laughed, I'm sorry I did that," he says softly, "It's just a given to me, because of my work. Nipple piercings aren't otherworldly, like they probably are for you."

She shouldn't be nitpicking, but somehow that hurts just as badly. Sometimes, she feels like a child around Harry. It's as if he's lived a thousand lives in the adult world and she's just recently gotten to have a smidgen of those experiences.

"It's not otherworldly," she says the word like it's an insult, and Harry has to press his lips into a line so he doesn't laugh, "I just didn't know people got them."

Clearing his throat, he forces himself to put on his professional piercer-and-tattooer face, "Yeah. It's something that anyone can get and I've done a fair amount of them. Semi-painful in the moment with a long healing time. They can look good on the right person, though."

That causes her eyebrows to nearly shoot up to her forehead.

"What do you mean, the right person?"

"You're just a nosy little thing tonight, aren't you?" Harry fires back with a smirk. She goes to cower with deflated shoulders but he instantly makes a tsk-ing noise with his mouth, grabbing her hands to keep her close, "I just mean, like any piercing, it doesn't always look right on the person. Sometimes people get nose or eyebrow piercings and it's like, oh, that's fine. But sometimes it's as if their anatomy looks complete with the piercing — almost like it's meant to be there, if that makes sense."

It doesn't, but it only continues to pique her curiosity even more.

"What about me?"

"What about you?" Harry chuckles, using a hand to smooth her hair down.

"What piercings would look good on me?"

He smirks at her little game. She plays this sometimes, and he assumes it only comes from a place of true wonder. When they talked about the drugs he's done before, she asked which ones he think she'd like. (None, except maybe for weed, but she has to get her anxiety under control before she tries it.) They went over different styles of tattoos when Y/N was interested in his work, especially when he explained that his are just a hodgepodge of designs, some with meaning, some without. (He said she can get whatever she wants if she decides on something one day, but he's particularly partial to a little "H" on her bum.) And now, she wants to know what piercings would fit her.

"You can get whatever you'd like, dovie," he replies, "Just as long as I'm the one doing it."

She rolls her eyes and leans her shoulder against the plush of the couch cushion. "Yeah, but you're the professional, Harry! You know what would look best on me."

"Anything would, you're gorgeous."

"That's a cop-out answer and you know it!"

Harry laughs loudly and places his hands atop her shoulders, "Okay, okay. Let me think, dovie. I need to assess my client."

"Oh, you're being a professional now?"

"Shhhh!" he exclaims, and it only makes her laugh harder. He's already gone to that focused place, though, with wandering but fixated eyes and that small crinkle between his eyebrows. She feels bashful beneath his gaze, blinking her eyes as he analyzes her facial features. She's watched him work before, but for some reason, this in particular reminds her of the first time they met, when she sat in on him tattooing Mai. She remembers the way her stomach warmed and her core throbbed at his attuned facial expression, similar to how it is now.

"Okay," he murmurs. Slowly, he reaches up to gently tap at the side of her nose. "I think you'd look very pretty with a small nose piercing."

"Really?"

He nods. "Yes, but you're beautiful with or without, so it doesn't matter. Plus, I can't have my girlfriend looking cooler than me."

She's not surprised at the way he instantly returns to his teasing self, even if it's not exactly the answer she was fishing for. She watches as he leans forward to grab his carton of noodles. With her tongue peeking out to moisten her lips, she attempts to grab his attention again.

"What about...?" she glances down at her chest. Harry looks at her with a quirked eyebrow. Her form is currently swallowed up in a sweatshirt that's a few sizes too large, so she realizes she's not being entirely specific about what she's asking. "Like...?"

"Huh?"

She sighs frustratedly, "My boobs!"

"Oh," Harry's eyes widen, flickering down to her covered breasts, "You wanna know if you'd look good with nipple piercings?"

She nods, nibbling on her bottom lip. She watches at the cogs turn in his brain, his gaze meeting hers a moment later.

"Need to see 'em." he says decidedly.

She huffs out a chuckle as he helps her peel her sweatshirt off, leaving her in a comfortable bralette. It's pale pink and sheer, but with Harry's hands splayed across her ribs, he still pulls the fabric down. In an instant, her nipples are stiff and peaked from the cold air, and she's attempting not to feel sheepish underneath his intense eyes as they flicker between her breasts.

"I don't know why I'm even contemplating it," he says, though it's mainly to himself, "Of course you'd look hot with them. You're you."

He looks up at her with a goofy grin before pressing a kiss between them. She blushes.

"You think so?" she asks as her hand finds the back of his neck. He nods, eyes flickering closed when her fingertips play with the shorter, curly tendrils.

"Of course."

"Would you do it, then?"

Harry's eyes shoot open. "Wait, what? I thought we were just... talking, I didn't think you were being serious."

Y/N shrugs, "I dunno, I kind of like the idea of it."

"Dovie... you only have your ears pierced," he mumbles, sitting up and reaching to gently touch her ear lobes, "If this is something you'd seriously want, I'd want you to think about it for at least, maybe, a few days, not just 10 minutes."

"I've never done anything impulsive, though," Y/N says through a whine. He understands it, and his face crinkles some at her request. "You've gotten tattoos while you were drunk! O-or given stupid ones to yourself!"

"I know, baby," Harry coos, "But those were stupid decisions and I don't want you to make the same ones. You're so much better than that."

She sighs dejectedly. He presses a kiss to each of her cheeks, then to her nose.

"I get it, dove, really. And by all means, I'd rather you get an impulsive piercing than a tattoo. But the healing time is really long, and it is painful. I just don't want you to regret it or... or get mad at me, either."

Y/N's heart softens a bit, nodding her head as she worries her bottom lip between her teeth. "No, I understand."

"If you still want them in a few weeks or months, I'm more than happy to be the one to do it," he says softly, reaching down to give her hand a small squeeze. She perks up a little at that, and he smiles. "Just give it some more thought, okay?"

. . .

Harry really, truly thought Y/N would never mention the whole nipple piercing thing again.

It turns out, his girl is way more stubborn than he could have ever anticipated, because it's been four weeks since then and she still wants them.

In fact, she's currently sitting in his little work zone, where he tattoos and pierces other clients. Not his girlfriend.

"Are you sure?" he asks for the thousandth time. In the time since she first brought it up, she's done tons of research, including asking Harry just short of a million questions. He appreciated her enthusiasm towards education, but talking about nipple piercings as soon as he finished up work wasn't always ideal. Still, though, he made sure to entertain anything she had to ask, even catching her looking up different jewelry styles and what it looked like on different people.

And, as soon as Jo accidentally overheard Y/N talking to him about it, of course she offered to show her own. Harry wanted to bang his head into a wall as he listened to them excitedly chatter in the corner, right after one of his employees bared her entire chest to his girlfriend. It had to be some type of workplace violation, only Harry served as the closest thing to Human Resources at the shop — and, considering they sold weed on the side, he didn't think he had much of a case against Jo.

It just so happened that Y/N got out of classes early on Wednesday and Harry hung around the shop those days, making deals and doing boring business administration things. When she asked if she could come by to get her piercings done, he reluctantly said yes.

It wasn't that he didn't absolutely love the idea of it — he did, actually, and his mouth nearly watered at the imagery it created in his brain. What he did hate was the thought of causing his girl any kind of pain. He was still in the camp of being fearful that she'd get angry at him if she didn't end up liking it. But her excitement towards it never wavered, and he would never be one to tell her no.

"Yes, I'm sure," Y/N replies, wringing her hands together in her lap. "I'm nervous, though."

"That's normal, dovie. Just try your best to relax, it's only me."

She nods as he shuts the door to give them some privacy. He never does that with clients, but he wants to make sure he's making it as comfortable as a process as possible — and, maybe he's keen on ensuring no one else gets a peek.

He busies himself with sanitizing his tools, washing his hands, and eventually pulling a pair of latex gloves on. He wishes he could make it a more fun experience for her, but the whole thing is quite medical.

"You already picked your jewelry out, right?" he asks lowly. She nods her head as she watches on.

"Mhm. I sent you a picture of it last week."

"Right, these simple pink barbels, hm?"

The piercing jewelry she'd chosen were pretty spot on to Y/N's aesthetic of being uncomplicated and feminine. When he saw what she picked, he immediately told her that it would fit her perfectly.

"Alright, I'm gonna clean them and then we can get started. Still feeling good?"

She nods again.

"You gonna tell me if you're gonna pass out again, baby?"

She scowls, remembering back to fainting from her first ear piercing. The sour, twisted frown on her face makes him laugh.

"That's still so embarrassing." she mumbles. On the newly cleaned workspace, Harry shakes his head, placing the sanitized jewelry and piercing supples down on it.

"Not embarrassing. Cute, actually," he corrects, peeling his gloves off. "Okay. I'm gonna help position you, is that okay?"

"Do you do that for every client?"

He narrows his eyes at her playfully, "No, you jealous little fiend."

She pulls her sweater off, revealing a pale blue baby tee. He swallows as she lays back on the extended table, taking a deep breath to surely calm her nerves. He gently squeezes her wrist, hovering over her form as she gets comfortable. When she shoots him a small nod, he smiles, flipping her shirt up.

"Okay, baby," he says, smoothing his hand over her stomach, "I'm sure you read this in your... insane amount of research—"

"Not insane."

He nods curtly, "Right, not insane," he quickly corrects. "Anyway, your nipples have to be hard for this. It helps with the placement."

She issues another silent nod his way but doesn't move to do anything. With a small smile, he gently cups her breast.

"Do you want me to?" he asks, his tone dropping lowly. She's not quite sure what he's even asking to do, but she still provides an affirmative answer. It's not a second more before he's latched his lips around her nipple, her eyes fluttering back from the sucking sensation. It's messy, the way he alternates between each one so they're swollen with his spit, and her fingers find his long curls, tugging at them gently to press him closer to her chest.

It feels like he's gone far too quickly, plushy, wet lips pressing a quick kiss to the valley between her breasts as he examines his work. Her mouth parts as she watches him bite his lip.

"You're good," he pants out, though he takes a moment to adjust the growing bulge in his pants, "Need to... put gloves back on."

They're both a bit lust-driven now, but Harry's quick to meld back into his professional persona after snapping a clean pair of gloves on his hands. Y/N swallows as he analyzes her, feeling squeamish beneath his eyes. Wordlessly, he grabs a marker and places two dots on either of her nipples.

"That's just for the placement," he explains, grabbing a mirror so she can look at where the jewelry would sit, "What do you think?"

Truthfully, they could have been completely wonky and Y/N wouldn't have noticed, let alone say anything. She trusts Harry implicitly, even if she still feels a bit hazy from the welcomed assault on her stiffened breasts.

"Good." she says with a nod, glancing up at him, "Looks good."

"Alright, baby," he replies. He turns to get the clean piercing needle from his rolling tray. "I'm gonna count down from three. I want you to close your eyes and inhale on three, then exhale on one. We'll take a short break after the first one, and then I'll do the second. Does that sound okay?"

"Mhm," she mumbles, nervously biting her lip. "Just do it, please. 'm gonna lose my nerve."

He chuckles and nods, instructing her to keep her eyes closed as he situates himself over her.

"Okay. Three— there you go, dovie, big, deep breath— two, one."

She immediately winces from the sharp bite of pain, a noisy gasp falling from her lips. Harry silently cringes to himself — not because the piercing isn't perfect, but because he absolutely hates knowing he's the reason why she's in pain right now.

"Keep your eyes closed, baby," he murmurs as he fits the jewelry through the first piercing, "Good girl. You're doing so good for me, hm? My strong baby."

She swallows harshly, hands balled into fists at her side. It's painful, that much is true, and she's beyond grateful when he finally finishes screwing the jewelry into place. She lets out a shaky breath and Harry coos, taking one of his gloves off to thumb her tears away.

"Was that okay, dovie?" he asks worriedly, "We can always save the second for another day."

Y/N quickly shakes her head, "No, no. Just do the other one now, otherwise I'll never have you do it."

Harry repeats the process on the other side. The pain is just as bad, tears continuing to cloud Y/N's vision and roll down her cheeks despite her keeping her eyes squeezed close. He shushes her softly throughout it, his heart tugging. Once he's finished, he's quick to wash his hands, listening to her quiet sniffles.

"I know baby, I know," he mumbles. He crosses the room as soon as he's done, sitting down next to her and brushing her hair back, "You did so good, you know that? 's all done, dovie, you're done."

She sniffs, batting her wet eyelashes up at him. "'s done?"

"Yeah, sweetheart." he says with a small, crooked smile. "You were so good. Took it like a champ."

"I didn't, I cried the whole time."

He chuckles and leans down to press a gentle kiss to her forehead. "Do you wanna see them?"

She nods, nibbling on her bottom lip as he stands to grab the handheld mirror. He helps her slowly sit up, hinging at the waist. He holds it up to her chest, both pairs of their eyes staring at her swollen breasts. His eyes flitter to her face to gauge her expression, scared that she hates them.

"Wait," she mutters, cocking her head to the side, "Wait... they're kind of hot."

Relief floods Harry's system and he smirks. "You think so?"

"Yeah," she nods, sitting up on her knees, "I know they're kinda puffy right now but... I think I like them. A lot."

Harry swallows harshly, dropping the mirror on his chair. Suddenly, he's surging towards her and taking her cheeks between his large palms, smushing their lips together like his life depends on it. It takes her entirely by surprise, and it's hurried and hot and desperate, so much so that she's panting into his mouth and gripping at his black tee-shirt.

When he finally breaks their kiss, strings of spit still connecting their mouths, he keeps his forehead pressed against hers. Again, he glances down to get another look at her chest.

"I love you so fucking much," are the only words he can utter out before he's pulling her jeans down to bury his head between her legs.

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