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ailuronymy · 2 years

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hi grey! i can’t even begin to find the right words for how much ailuronymy has meant to me, and just how much it’s added to my life over the years. it’s the reason i started using tumblr way back in early 2012! i came into your blog as a 13 year old curious about traditional naming, referencing your naming guide for all my oc’s, but my experiences here became so much more than that. as a kid, i definitely looked up to you (i thought you were very cool; still do!), and this blog was genuinely enlightening to me.

the critique you shared on the misogyny and ableism in the writing of warriors stuck with me from a young age and really opened my eyes; i started being very critical of that in writing. i wouldn’t realize i was disabled until years later, but when i did, i remembered that you were always on my side in that way—you stood up for us. i remember you once said that weed (heh) wasn’t a valid prefix because the plants may be “weeds” to us, but they’re still individual species of plants, and now here i am, memorizing plants i see out in nature, plant identifier app always at the ready and checking out books about flora! i probably would have always thought of them as weeds without you. once upon a time, it was ailuronymy, too, that introduced me to messybeast, where i dove head first into a special interest in cat coat and eye color genetics that ive had ever since! i look at the world through such a different lens than i would have otherwise, and it truly enriches it.

a long time ago, you commented on someone’s submission saying that there was no such thing as “biologically male” or “biologically female” and that anatomy is not inherently gendered. as someone who had just realized they were trans, and had never heard someone say that before, that just... changed everything to me. it was a game changer for my dysphoria, and something that still comforts me 8 years later. i never let anyone use those words to refer to me again. as a trans person, you made me feel supported—like you were always in our corner. someone that i had respected and looked up to for years stood up for me, and i felt seen.

and while i’m not much of a writer myself, i’ve always loved hearing what you have to say about the subject. if anything ever did inspire me to write, it was the advice and thoughts you shared about it here. you’re one of my favorite writers! the warrior cats fics you’ve written had a profound impact on me emotionally and i wish the books themselves could come close. i remember enjoying the tallstar’s revenge one so much, having not read the book, that i decided it would stay as the definitive version of it in my mind simply because i adored the worldbuilding. your interpretation of the warrior cats universe will always be a joy to read, because there is so much careful consideration behind it. it really comes through on the page, and you can feel it.

all this to say: thank you, grey, for all of the love you’ve poured into this blog. i wanted to tell you the impact you’ve had on my life, with even the most casual things you’ve said. it has all mattered to me, and it always will. it’s hard to say goodbye, but i’m excited to see where you go next, and i’ll happily be following solacefruit! you’re an inspiring and delightful presence in this world, and i know i would be the luckiest student ever if i had you as a teacher.

It was difficult to know how to reply to this message, because it’s one of those times where it feels like I can’t do justice in a simple “thank you”--but there’s also no way to really capture everything that I would like to say, so: thank you.

There is so much here that I’m grateful you’ve shared with me. I am so glad I could be a supportive voice for you in times when that was something you needed, and I’m glad that what I’ve said here resonated with you and brought you solace and comfort and insight into your own experience.

I’ve always tried to do what I thought was right by people here. And I think I often missed the mark, and made mistakes, and there’s a lot I wish I could redo in ways that were more inclusive and kind to begin with. But I am very very glad that, despite all my own imperfections during my time running this blog, that I was able to do so much right by you. That alone would make ten years of work worth it.

I’m very proud of you. Being “different” in any way is an incredible act of courage, but not one that many people--queer people, disabled people, people of colour--get to ever opt out of. You have to be brave because if you want to exist, that’s what it takes. But I still think it’s something that should be recognised and honoured, and I am so glad that you’ve been able to discover so much about what brings you joy during your time reading Ailuronymy. It’s really something wonderful to know that this blog contributed in some small way to you becoming the person you are.

Thank you for telling me. Take great care of yourself. <3

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serialreblogger · 4 years

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You want to talk more about the bigotry in Harry Potter? Go ahead! I've actually heard stuff like that before, but have yet to do much research on it personally and it's been a while since I read it, so I'm interested.

WELL

Before we begin I should start with a disclaimer: this analysis will be dedicated to examining as many bigoted aspects of Harry Potter’s writing as I can think of, so--while I personally am more or less comfortable balancing critical evaluation with enjoyment of a piece, and strongly advocate developing your own abilities to do the same--I know not everyone is comfortable reading/enjoying a story once they realize its flaws, and again, while I think it’s very important to acknowledge the flaws in culturally impactful stories like Harry Potter, I also know for some people the series is really really important for personal reasons and whatnot.

So! If you’re one of those people, and you have trouble balancing critical engagement with enjoyment, please feel free to skip this analysis (at least for the time being). Self-care is important, and it’s okay to find your own balance between educating yourself and protecting yourself.

On another note, this is gonna be limited strictly to morally squicky things to do with Rowling’s writing and the narrative itself. Bad stuff characters do won’t be talked about unless it’s affirmed by the narrative (held up as morally justified), and plot holes, unrealistic social structures, etc. will not be addressed (it is, after all, a kid’s series, especially in the first few books. Quidditch doesn’t have to make sense). This is strictly about how Rowling’s personal biases and bigotry impacted the story and writing of Harry Potter.

Sketch Thing #1: Quirrell! I don’t see a lot of people talking about Quirrell and racism, but I feel like it’s a definite thing? Quirinus Quirrell is a white man who wears a turban, gifted to him by an “African prince” (what country? where? I couldn’t find a plausible specific when I was researching it for a fic. If there’s a country which has current/recent royalty that might benevolently interact with someone, and also a current/recent culture where turbans of the appropriate style are common, I couldn’t find it). Of course, it wasn’t actually given to him by an African prince in canon, but it’s still an unfortunate explanation.

More importantly, ALL the latent Islamophobia/xenophobia in the significance of the turban. Like, look at it.

“Man wears turban, smells like weird spices, turns out to be concealing an evil second face under the turban” really sounds like something A Bit Not Good, you know? If you wanted to stoke the flames of fear about foreignness, it would be hard to do it better than to tell children about a strange man who’s hiding something horrible underneath a turban.

Also, Quirrell’s stutter being faked to make you think he was trustworthy is a very ableist trope, and an unfortunately common one. “Disability isn’t actually real, just a trick to make you accommodate and trust them” is not a great message, and it’s delivered way too often by mass media. (Check out season 1 of the Flash for another popular example.)

Sketch Thing #2: The goblins. Much more commonly talked about, in my experience, which is good! The more awareness we have about the messages we’re getting from our popular media, the better, in my view.

For those who haven’t encountered this bit of analysis before: the goblins in Harry Potter reek of antisemitic stereotypes. Large ears, small eyes, crooked noses, green/gray skin, lust for money, control of the banks, and a resentful desire to overthrow the Good British Government? Very reminiscent of wwii propaganda posters, and in general the hateful rhetoric directed towards Jewish people by other European groups from time immemorial.

I’m also extremely uncomfortable with how goblin culture is handled by Rowling in general. Like, the goblins were a people that were capable of using magic, but prohibited by the British government from owning wands. That was never addressed. They also had a different culture around ownership, which is why Griphook claimed that the sword of Gryffindor belonged rightfully to the goblins--a gift isn’t passed down to descendants upon death, but instead reverts to the maker. This cultural miscommunication is glossed over, despite the fact that it sounds like Griphook’s voicing a very real, legitimate grievance.

To be honest, apart from the antisemitism, the way Goblin culture is treated by the narrative in Harry Potter is very uncomfortably reminiscent to me of how First Nations were treated by English settlers in North America, before the genocide really got started. The Goblins even have a history of “rebellions,” which both raises the question of why another species is ruling them to begin with, and more significantly, is eerily reminiscent of the Red River Rebellion in Canada (which, for the record, wasn’t actually a rebellion--it was Metis people fighting against the Canadian government when it tried to claim the land that legally, rightfully belonged to the Metis. But that’s another story)

In sum: I Don’t Like the implications of how Rowling treats the goblins.

Sketch Thing #3: Muggles. Ok because we’re all “muggles” (presumably) and because I’m white, talking about this might rapidly degenerate into thinly-veiled “reverse racism” discourse, so please y’all correct me if I stray into that kind of colossal stupidity. However, I am not comfortable with the way non-magical humans are treated by Rowling’s narrative.

The whole premise of Harry Potter is that Evil Wizards Want To Hurt The Muggles, right? Except that it’s not. Voldemort’s goal is to subjugate the inferior humans, rule over non-magical people as the rightful overlords, but that’s hardly mentioned by the narrative. Instead, it focuses on the (also egregious and uncomfortably metaphorical) “blood purism” of wizarding culture, and how wizards would be persecuted for their heritage.

But muggles, actual muggles, are arguably the ones who stand to lose the most to Voldemort, and they’re never notified of their danger. We, the muggles reading it, don’t even really register that we’re the collateral damage in this narrative. Because throughout the series, muggles are set up as laughingstocks. Even the kindest, most muggle-friendly wizards are more obsessed with non-magical people as a curiosity than actually able to relate to them as people.

I dunno, friends, I’m just uncomfortable with the level of dehumanization that’s assigned to non-magical humans. (Like, there’s not even a non-offensive term for them in canon. There’s “muggle,” which is humorously indulgent at best and actively insulting at worst, and there’s “squib,” which is literally the word for a firework that fails to spark.) It’s not like “muggles” are actually a real people group that can be oppressed, and like I said this kind of analysis sounds a bit like the whining of “reverse racism” advocates where the powerful majority complains about being insulted, but... it kind of also reeks of ableism. People that are not able to do a certain cool, useful thing (use magic) are inherently inferior, funny at best and disposable at worst. They suffer and die every day from things that can easily be cured with magic, but magic-users don’t bother to help them, and even when they’re actively attacked the tragedy of hundreds dying is barely mourned by the narrative.

It gives me bad vibes. I don’t Love It. It sounds uncomfortably like Rowling’s saying “people that are unable to access this common skill are inherently inferior,” and that really does sound like ableism to me.

Either way, there’s something icky about consigning an entire group of people to the role of “funny clumsy stupid,” regardless of any real-world connections there may or may not be to that people group. Don’t teach children that a single genetic characteristic can impact someone’s personhood, or make them inherently less worthy of being taken seriously. Just, like... don’t do that.

Sketch Thing #4: The house elves. Everyone knows about the house elves, I think. The implications of “they’re slaves but they like it” and the only person who sees it as an issue having her campaign turned into a joke by the narrative (“S.P.E.W.”? Really? It might as well stand for “Stupidly Pleading for Expendable Workers”) are pretty clear.

Sketch Thing #5: Azkaban. Are we gonna talk about how wizarding prison involves literal psychological torture, to the point where prisoners (who are at least sometimes there wrongly, hence the plot of book 3) almost universally go “insane”? This is sort of touched on by the narrative--“dementors are bad and we shouldn’t be using them” was a strongly delivered message, but it was less “because torturing people, even bad people, is not a great policy” and more “because dementors are by their natures monstrous and impossible to fully control.”

“This humanoid species is monstrous and impossible to control” is, once again, a very concerning message to deliver, and it doesn’t actually address the real issue of “prison torture is bad, actually.” Please, let’s not normalize the idea that prison is inherently horrific. Of course, prison as it exists in North America and Britain is, indeed, inherently horrific and often involves torture (solitary confinement, anyone?), but like--that’s a bad thing, y’all, it’s deeply dysfunctional and fundamentally unjust. Don’t normalize it.

Sketch Thing #6: Werewolves. Because Rowling explicitly stated that lycanthropy in her series is a metaphor for “blood-borne diseases like HIV/AIDS”. The linked article says it better than I could:

Rowling lumps HIV and AIDS in with other blood-borne illnesses, which ignores their uniquely devastating history. And Lupin’s story is by no stretch a thorough or helpful examination of the illness. Nor is its translation as an allegory easily understood, beyond the serious stigma that Rowling mentioned.

That Lupin is a danger to others could not more clearly support an attitude of justifiable fear toward him, one that is an abject disservice to those actually struggling with a disease that does not make them feral with rage.

This definitely ties into homophobia, given how deeply the queer community has been affected by HIV/AIDS. Saying a character with a condition that makes him an active threat to those around him is “a metaphor for AIDS” is deeply, deeply distressing, both for its implications about queer people and their safety for the general population, and for the way it specifically perpetuates the false belief that having HIV/AIDS makes a person dangerous.

Sketch Thing #7: Blood Ties. This isn’t, like, inherently sketch, but (especially for those of us with complicated relationships to our birth families) it can rub a lot of people the wrong way. Rowling talks a big talk about the folly of “blood purism,” but she also upholds the idea that blood and blood relations are magically significant.

Personally, I’m very uncomfortable with the fact that Harry was left with an abusive family for his entire childhood, and it was justified because they were his “blood relatives.” I’ve had this argument with ultra-conservative family friends who genuinely believe it’s a parent’s right to abuse their child, and while I don’t think that’s what Rowling is saying, I do feel uncomfortable with the degree of importance she places on blood family. I’m uncomfortable with the narrative’s confirmation that it is acceptable (even necessary) to compromise on boundaries and allow the continuation of abuse because “it’s better for a child to be raised by their Real Family” than it is to risk them to the care of an unrelated parent.

Genetic relations aren’t half as important as Rowling tells us. For people with a bad birth family, this can be a damaging message to internalize, so I’ll reiterate: it’s a pretty thought, the love in blood, but it’s ultimately false. The family you build is more real, more powerful and more valid than any family you were assigned to by an accident of genes.

I can think of one or two more things, but they’re all a lot more debatable than what I have here--as it is, you might not agree with everything I’ve said. That’s cool! I’m certainly not trying to start a fight. We all have the right to read and interpret things for ourselves, and to disagree with each other. And again, I’m not trying to ruin Harry Potter. It’s honestly, as a series, not worse in terms of latent bigotry than most other books of its time, and better than many. It’s just more popular, with a much bigger impact and many more people analyzing it. I do think it’s important to critically evaluate the media that shapes one’s culture, and to acknowledge its shortcomings (and the ways it can be genuinely harmful to people, especially when it’s as culturally powerful as Harry Potter). But that doesn’t mean you can’t or shouldn’t enjoy it for what it was meant to be: a fun, creative, engaging story, with amazing characters, complex plots, heroism and inspiration for more than one generation of people.

Enjoy Harry Potter. It is, in my opinion, a good series, worth reading and re-reading for enjoyment, even for nourishment. It’s also flawed. These things can both be true.

#harry potter #linden writes an essay #long post #THANK YOU for the ask lunar i am SO HAPPY to write all this #i do hope i didn't offend anyone though #please let me know if i've been unintentionally racist y'all i'm white as rice and very willing to learn and grow #also i think it's possible i missed mentioning something glaring because like. harry potter is good but jk rowling is... not #but i think i got most of my thoughts down #harry potter meta #racism #homophobia #bigotry #ask linden #jk rowling

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mimzy-writing-online · 5 years

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Writing a Blind/Visually Impaired Character: Blind Jokes

The question is, should you include blind jokes in your story? Is it okay or is it offensive? How can you avoid being offensive?

We’ll talk about all that.

So if you haven’t seen me around yet- Hi! I’m Mimzy, I’m a writer and I run a writing advice blog. This blog is full of writing advice posts I personally made as well as posts from other people that I found useful. There are also writing memes, tag games, and wip updates. I sometimes share updates from my current work in progress, A Witch’s Memory, which features a blind main character.

This post is part of an extensive guide to writing blind characters that continues to grow with time. Link to the masterpost of those guides:

https://mimzy-writing-online.tumblr.com/post/185122795699/writing-a-blind-or-visually-impaired-character

Disclaimer: I am a visually impaired person who has been living with blindness for about two years now. I have lived with the world seeing me as blind and I know how it treats me because of that. I have made plenty of blind jokes in the past. I have also written two blind characters. However- in this particular case, it is more my opinion than fact, and someone with different blind experiences than me might feel differently.

Some blind people love blind jokes, others hate them. Some will make them because they are blind, but will hate when sighted people make them. Everyone is different and all their experiences and opinions are valid. I’m of the opinion that everyone deserves to have their boundaries respected, and for some people that means not making jokes about their disability.

“Well, my blind friend loves blind jokes! I can make them!”

Maybe with that specific friend, if they’re really okay with that, but if another blind person tells you to stop- you MUST STOP. It’s basic human respect, and someone living with a disability deserves respect.

So, should you make blind jokes in your story? Read to find out.

I think the best thing I can say is to proceed with caution and to think this through.

This starts with your blind character. Answer some questions-

What is this character’s sense of humor outside of blind jokes?

How does this character feel about their blindness?

Have they been bullied or discriminated against or treated badly because of their blindness?

What kind of bullying and discrimination was it? What did those people do?

How comfortable is this character in social situations? With friends? With family? With strangers?

What kind of confidence does your character have? Both in themselves and in their abilities and disability?

Answering these questions might tell you how your character feels about blind jokes.

Someone who is more sarcastic or who has darker humor might love blind jokes. Someone with a more tame or a flatter sense of humor might not like them.

Someone who hasn’t accepted their blindness yet, or who struggles with it, might not like jokes because it’s still a sensitive subject.

Someone who was bullied by others might have had blind jokes made about them. This has a double side. It might cause them to hate blind jokes altogether. It might cause them to want to reclaim blind jokes so that others can’t use it against them.

How comfortable they are in a situation might change if they make them or not.

Blind jokes can be a bit like self-deprecating humor. Insecure people make self-deprecating jokes to cope with their insecurity. Other insecure people don’t, because those jokes make them feel worse about themselves. Confident people might make self-deprecating jokes because it doesn’t affect them. They might also not do that.

It depends on the person.

So some blind people make blind jokes, others don’t. Some love when other people make blind jokes because it proves how comfortable they are as friends, some hate hearing sighted people make blind jokes.

Should your sighted characters make blind jokes?

I’m of the opinion that they shouldn’t. For a lot of people, their only exposure to people with disabilities is through media and public figures with disability. That is true for me as well.

I know lots of people with invisible disabilities, I know very few people with visible disabilities. And in person I’ve only met one or two people who are blind or visually impaired. Most of my exposure to the disabled community is through the internet.

And I’m disabled.

So abled people have even less exposure than that, and have fewer reasons to reach out to the disabled community. So their exposure comes from media.

Which is why sighted people so easily believe the myths of blindness.

Quick run down of myths:

Myth: blind people see nothing. Truth: only 10% of people living with blindness see nothing. Most have at least some light and shadow perception.

Myth: all blind people have a cane or guide dog. Truth: a lot of people who are legally blind or who are low-vision don’t have either, usually due to the idea that they “see enough” to not need it, which often times comes from internalized ableism and not being “disabled enough” for accommodations.

Myth: all blind people have cloudy or messed up looking eyes. Truth: The appearence of someone’s eyes depends on the cause of their blindness. Examples- Cataracts create a cloudy-film over the eye. Retina diseases are internal and don’t affect the outside layers of the eye, creating normal-appearing eyes.

Myth: all blind people wear dark sunglasses. Truth: some do, some don’t.

Myth: all blind people have super hearing. Truth: blind people learn to use their hearing and other senses more than their sight.

But all these myths are perpetuated by media, and people with no real life exposure to a subject rely on media.

Guess what! Your stories are media and people will learn through your stories.

So how you write your character affects what people know and think about blind people. So if your character says “yeah, blind jokes are cool all the time and I never mind” then readers are going to think that’s the universal truth for blind characters.

“But my blind character’s sense of humor is perfect for blind jokes!” you say.

Great! Just be aware of the fact that you’re teaching your readers to make these jokes, so maybe set aside some time in narrative for the blind character to explain that not every blind person likes jokes, or that some who do might not like it from certain people, or might find some jokes more offensive than others.

“But this particular joke is hilarious!” you say.

Are you sure? Because to date I’m not sure I’ve met a sighted person with an actually funny and original blind joke. In fact, it seems most sighted people make the same universal crappy jokes, some more maliciously than others. For the first year of blindness I didn’t mind it, but after a while of multiple repeats and some toxic friendships I grew to hate them.

“You really hate blind jokes, don’t you?”

Well, no. I like blind jokes from actual blind people who experience being blind.

And I do make jokes, but I make blind jokes for one specific reason.

It’s not to make my disability “easier to deal with” or use humor to help the complicated emotions a disability gives me. My blind jokes aren’t a coping mechanism. I’m very happy, and I don’t see my blindness as a curse at all.

The reason I make blind jokes is to make my blindness “easier to deal with” for sighted people, especially when meeting strangers. Because sighted people always feel awkward when meeting a blind person, and also because many people don’t really get that I’m blind or don’t know how to ask about it. So I make a joke or two to show I’m comfortable talking about it, followed soon by a non-blindness joke to show that I’m still a real person behind my cane and my sunglasses.

(Yes, I wear sunglasses. I am that stereotype, but that’s because I’m painfully, medically light sensitive. Not all blind people wear sunglasses all the time, and those that do use it for many reasons, i.e. fashion or light sensitivity or not having to worry about being judged for a lack of eye contact)

“So blind jokes are only funny when blind people make them?”

Usually, but that’s because they know when they find a joke offensive, and have heard all the generic ones before, and know when they hear one they like. They’re not going to make the unfunny, offensive ones because they know better.

Okay, I lied. I’ve maybe heard one or two actually funny blind jokes from a sighted person in my blindness experience, but those were occasions when someone wasn’t trying to make a blind joke, it was something said that was funny in the moment.

Like my girlfriend at the time running a red light and saying “don’t ever do that when you learn to drive” and then stopping to realize I would never learn to drive, but that she’d said it because she was teaching a friend how to drive and was getting into that habit of giving advice while in the car. And she said, “wait, never mind, you’re never going to drive.”

It was the absurdity of the moment combined with the strange high of being in the crazy situation of being lost trying to find our way home after a great date and running a light in a unusually quiet street in the middle of the night. I was already in an elated place and the mood was great and that’s what made the joke enjoyable.

“Okay, I still don’t know the difference between a good and a bad blind joke. And my character is still the kind of person to make them, so what do I do?”

Oh, great, so here’s my final piece of advice.

Hire a Sensitivity Reader

(Or find a blind beta reader if this is fanfiction)

Sensitivity readers are for authors looking to publish their work professionally, where their name is on the line and if they miss the mark when writing a minority it will reflect badly on their name and on future published works.

Publishing houses have their own editors to review manuscripts before they’re published officially, and they usually hire their own sensitivity readers as well. Why? Because their name is on every story they publish, so they’re also accountable if a book featuring awful bias and inaccurate stereotypes is published through their company. That’s not to say they won’t occasionally print one rotten apple of a book that slipped through the cracks, but they know to invest in people who identify the rotten apples.

If you’re self publishing, then you already don’t have a copy editor to make sure everything is in place, and you certainly don’t have a sensitivity reader.

When you’re self publishing you will be investing your own money into getting this book out into the public, so invest your money wisely and make sure this book isn’t ready to cancel itself the second someone realizes how awful the representation is.

“So I need a sensitivity reader for one disabled character?”

Uh, you need a sensitivity reader for just about everything. Sensitivity readers are not just for disabled characters.

There are sensitivity readers for all the minorities and unique experiences you could think of, and then some. Sensitivity readers have unique backgrounds and they use their life experiences to read your book through the lens of that background. They will tell you when you were inaccurate about something, when you used a stereotype or wrote something problematic, and hopefully keep you from publishing something that could be damaging to your book and your reputation as a writer.

Please note, you can choose to ignore their feedback and advice. You’re not required to listen to them, nor are you required to get one, but going without may put you at risk.

I’m going to quote from the Quiet House Editing and their website. They are a company that connects you to sensitivity readers, child readers (if you’re writing children’s books) and beta readers. And their website has an extensive list of different types of sensitivity readers (some of which I’d never considered before)

Their website

http://www.quiethouseediting.com/diversityreading.html

Subjects that diversity readers may be able to help you with (not an exhaustive list):

Adoption (all aspects, including transracial and international adoptions) Ageism Alcoholism, substance abuse Bullying, cyberbullying Class, socioeconomic and poverty issues, first-generation Culture Domestic violence Eating disorder, obesity, body image Emotional abuse End-of-life care, death attitudes, hospice and palliative care, etc. Ethnicity and race Feminist and gender issues, including abortion Geek culture (dealing with a love of comics, anime, etc.) Generational issues (i.e., millennials, baby boomers, etc.) Immigrant culture Indigenous cultures LGBTQ+ (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer or Questioning, but this category can also include intersex, asexual, pansexual, and other terms) Mental illnesses and disorders (anxiety, autism, depression, bipolar, OCD, paranoid personality disorder, dissociative disorder, Stockholm syndrome, PTSD, ADHD, schizophrenia, and more) Physical illnesses and disability. This includes chronic illnesses, as well as illnesses with a severe impact (cancer, for example) Religion, atheism, paganism Sex abuse and sex assault, including child sex abuse and rape Sex workers, porn performers Tokenism (being the only person of a race or culture in a group)

I’m going to add some links to articles about sensitivity reading that I’ve read recently that can help explain the process more thoroughly, including finding a sensitivity reader, the money and business aspect of it, and what you can expect from their services.

https://blog.reedsy.com/sensitivity-readers/

https://writerunboxed.com/2017/03/03/what-a-sensitivity-reader-is-and-isnt-and-how-to-hire-one/

So, in conclusion:

You can write blind jokes, I’m not saying you absolutely can’t. I’m saying you should be careful when doing so. Proceed with extreme caution. If you can, you should find a sensitivity reader.

If any blind people want to give their perspective and opinion on the subject, please do so. I’m only one blind person with one experience, and it’s not universal. Blindness is never universal.

Hey, did you like this advice? Do you like this blog? Do you want to support it?

I give free writing advice, answer asks, and give private consultation for writing blind characters, all for free.

I have set up a ko-fi as a way to save money for self publishing costs for A Witch’s Memory, which includes a blind main character and is in it’s first stage of editing.

I have zero intention of ever charging for the services of this blog, but financial support is always appreciated. You never have to donate if you don’t want to, I never expect that, but even a few bucks goes a long way in helping me get there.

My ko-fi: https://ko-fi.com/mimzyreiner

Thank you for reading and making it this far!

#writing advice #writeblr #writing a blind character #writing community #actuallyblind #my advice #mine #blind character #sensitivity reading #blindness

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cruddyborderlandstheories · 5 years

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Punk Girl/Civil War Submission by The Wild West Pyro

Heyo, good morning/afternoon/evening/night

My friend on discord (The Wild West Pyro) had an absolutely mind-blowing theory concerning who the band ‘Punk’ Girl is, why she’s important to the story, and how she will lead to the rift in the Calypso Twins relationship. I don’t want to spoil anything for you guys, so I’m just going to dive right in.

(A majority of this will be directly from our conversation, with [some edits by me] to help with context and add in pictures.)

Here we go!

So we figured Punk Girl is in some way related to the CoV, or the cult in general, as she makes an appearance on what seems to be a cult-centric shirt on the gearboxloot instagram page (more credit to @ifalnasminiatures for providing me with this link!)

“Well, there are [a few] ways this could go:

Punk is linked to the COV and is intended to spread their message even further with the typical subliminal brainwashing thing. So they can broadcast outside of the planets the Cult has a presence on.

It’s a sore subject between the Twins, but one they hide rather well. The girl is related to them, she’s just considered by one of them as “that disgrace who refused to reclaim the birthright and ran off to join a band instead, ugh.”

She’s a band that works for the Cult sometimes. But in fact, she’s the eyes and ears of the Alliance within the Cult. Best of all is that she’s directly related to the Twins. Secretly, she disapproves of what they’re doing, but she’s the Alliance’s best hope of what’s going on.”

[That last one is the one he goes over the most, and it’s super interesting.]

“The Twins never suspect that the spy was in fact the one closest to their hearts.”

[my response: It would explain why there are no other bosses on the MoM that we know of (excluding the twins bc those are guaranteed), because she’s never going to become a fight even tho she looks the part]

“Also, [regarding] the last bit of your post, it’s just asking for a sidequest where it’s revealed that all the Gen 3.0 VHs known how to play some sick bass.

Punk Girl: ‘Hey, my bass guy is sick, can you take over?’

Zane: ‘FECK YEAH’”

[We talk a bit here about a Scott Pilgrim-esque Battle of the Bands, with Mr. Torgue as the competition, so there’s a bit of a transition that’s missing.]

“Hey, you know how Athena encrypted her messages between Engorge commercials? Punk Girl cleverly hides her messages in her music or backmasking. That’s how she sends her info to the Vault Hunters.

The twins never suspect a thing, and when she finally reveals she’s been working for Lilith, they’re genuinely shocked- and then the rift develops. One sibling would want to protect the girl, the other would want to punish her. The twins seem extremely close, so I personally feel it’d be odd if one of them up and betrayed the other [without outside influence].

It would be a great twist, too. Jack always had something planned out to trip up the Vault Hunters. But Lilith has learned much within these seven years. It turns out, Lilith is far better at pulling the strings than we ever thought Tyreen was.

Also, when Punk Girl reveals that she’s a spy for the Alliance (likely mid-game), this happens:

Tyreen screaming “YOU BITCH” amongst other horrible things and ECHOing up Punk Girl to verbally abuse her for hours, which continues through the rest of the game.

Troy trying to gently persuade his youngest sister to “Please come back” and “I don’t want to kill you”, attempting to smooth-talk her back into supporting the Cult. He keeps on ECHOing her gift baskets.

The twins arguing with each other over the fate of Punk Girl. Which, if done right, could potentially lead to a civil war within the Cult…

And to think it was all over a nice girl in a cool band.

Of course, both Troy and Tyreen are trying to kill the Alliance still, they’re just now divided over the fate of the girl and who’s gonna get the power of the vaults.

Which would add a human layer to it all- in the end, it’s just two selfish children squabbling over some big, universe-shattering toys. Albeit with billions of lives ended in the crossfire.

The war predicted by the Watcher was terrible. Zarpedon said so as well.

And, honestly, nothing’s more brutal and vicious than a civil war several galaxies-wide.”

[It was at this point that I absolutely lost my shit (in a good way) bc goddamn bro]

“Ideally, Tyreen goes out of her way to harass, demean and try to ruin poor Punk Girl’s life, and the [Crimson Raider] Alliance have to help her stand emotionally as Punk Girl undergoes a truly horrible campaign of cyberbullying, physical assault, very violent death threats and actual attacks on her band members. Tyreen mobilizes all her loyal followers to just try to hurt Punk Girl on whatever way they can.

Troy is a little different. He’s supposed to represent the streamer who manipulates fans into giving him what he wants, or scams folks by pretending to be disabled or whatever. Or the handsome fellow who’s a total self-centered jackass on the inside, but charms many people’s hearts nonetheless. So he tries to subtly brainwash Punk Girl into returning over to the Cult, and sweet-talking her to try and get her back on his sides. He’s like the caring, warm big brother on the surface, but really he just wants a new loyal sibling at his side, someone he can control far more easily. Troy’s promises are extremely alluring, his followers appear to be proposing an alliance with the Raiders (which Lilith refuses at all costs) and it’s going to be difficult for Punk Girl to resist his brainwashing techniques and honeyed words.

Basically, protect Lilith’s most treasured and loyal agent, including asking out Atlas and maybe other friendly corporations for favors to protect Punk Girl and her bodyguards (the new VHs). Bonus points if Punk Girl really is a latent Siren or something, and her power has to be safeguarded.”

[So, we know the unknown Sirens (there are two atm) are, if we understand Siren powers correctly: 12 and 7 at the time of bl3.

HOWEVER. It’s been stated by Danny Homan that there are multiple ways for someone to receive Siren powers:

The most important part of this exchange is the idea that, in universe, somehow, existing people can become Sirens. Now, I am not sure if this is solely through other Siren powers (Tyreen), or Vault bullshitery, or if they just wake up one day with the tattoos, but according to Homan, it’s definitely possible. In fact, I would go so far as to say the writers are keeping things intentionally vague for this reason.

What I’m trying to reason here is that even if Punk Girl is older than 12 or 7 (odds are she is, if she’s in a band!), she could still be a Siren, just that she got her powers at a later age, like 11 or so, meaning she’d be about 23 or 18 in BL3, respectively]

“If Angel does return, and Punk Girl is going through utter hell thanks to the twins, Angel will be the finest confidant and greatest friend she’ll ever have. Angel went through similar treatment at the hands of Jack, and she’s not going to let another girl with wings get hurt again.

I mean, most of Punk Girl’s story arc would be heartbreaking, as it really seems like the Twins have fully turned their wrath on her rather than Lilith and the Alliance. Luckily, the Vault Hunters are there to act as her shield. Like, whenever you pass her in the ship, your character can give a random line of encouragement in the really tough times she’s going through, or something like that.

And if Punk Girl turns out to be the final Siren after all, Lilith, Angel, and Maya would all ensure that she’d never be hurt like they were in the past.

As the abuse Punk Girl would be receiving is from her own blood relations, [it] would be far more painful for someone to experience.

Now, for how the corporations may get involved, they’ll probably just start by trying to exploit this new galactic-wide civil war (especially as it’s hinted that the Twins do mass brainwashing or something [in the] Psycho character guide), then throwing each others’ armies at their rivals in support of one Twin or another. Although I’d imagine that Atlas and maybe Jakobs would stay out of it. [In addition], the Hyperion analyst in Moze’s ECHO from Commander Lily has dialogue that implies that all the corporations are preparing in case a Second Corporate War breaks out, since the first one essentially made the BL universe what it is now.

There we go, we have the war set up, as entire populations turn on each other, having become psychos pledging undying loyalty to one of the Twins. It’s going to be a mess.

[To end] on a comical level:

Maya: (hugging both [Ava and Punk Girl]) I love my dumpster children.

[Also:]

Tyreen, with this red background and thrash metal playing in the background and “angry war face” makeup: HEY MY WHORE OF A LITTLE SISTER, YOU ARE A [insert hate speech from evil liverstreamer gremlin here].

Troy, in a fancy suit and in a warm armchair with a fireplace roaring behind him: Hello, little sister. You remember the time we played at the beach together? Well… [insert sentimental tale of sibling love and fun here that is really a thinly veiled plea to rejoin the Cult].

That’s it, that’s both their streams from that point on.”

[I don’t have much to add, to be honest. This was great.

I love the whole thing, all the way down to his characterization of everyone involved. I can totally see Tyreen being the loud, explosive one out of the two, with Troy being quieter, but far more manipulative. I think it would contrast nicely with their designs and what people might be expecting from them, especially with how Troy is the big one with his cybernetics and always scowling, and Tyreen is shorter, always smirking and looking like she’s in control. It’d be so funny to see those two roles reversed and I really, really hope that’s the plan. Especially after the reveal that Troy is the one with the braincell lmao.

The idea that this small incident could end up causing a huge, brutal war, not just between the twins, but the corporations as well, is great. We know the Watcher claims ‘war is coming’, and this would help explain what we should expect. It would be very interesting if we needed to pick a side of aid at the start of the fight (i do imagine this will be Troy if The Wild West Pyro’s characterization of the twins is true), then turn on that side once the other is eliminated.

Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed this as much as I do!! Massive credit to The Wild West Pyro for literally all of it. It was a really fun read.]

#borderlands #bl3 #borderlands 3 #the calypso twins #mystery punk girl #punk girl

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theanimeview · 5 years

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Reboots: They’re for who?

When I was interning a handful of summers ago, I remember talking with a handful of editors and peers about our favorite comic to television adaptations. I said honestly that I am not a fan of Teen Titans Go because I don’t think it has a lot of substance when compared to Teen Titans or Young Justice. It’s a problem I have with a lot of reboots, and I remember distinctly one of the editors saying that reboots “aren’t for you.” That’s a fair statement, they’re not for me specifically, they’re for... who exactly?

What the editor meant, I believe, is that a reboot isn’t really for the original fans of a series. It’s for a new generation to experience the characters and become fans. The characters we see from one show to another are kind of like reincarnated versions--they may have similar names and art styles but, the characters are kind of new because their stories are new. I think that this is often correct. However, I want to disagree a little with the idea that reboots aren’t aimed for older fans. Good reboots should have something that the older fans can enjoy too. I say this because clearly reboots in some ways market to the audience that watched the previous iteration(s), sort of like a big sign saying, “Hey, remember this show you loved as a kid? The one that we sold a lot of for a long time? Yeah? Great! Why don’t you check out our new version and show it to your kids/younger siblings/others?!” Their’s nothing really wrong with that, its an effective sales/marketing strategy, but for it to work the new iteration needs to have something old fans will appreciate.

A great example is My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic - the series takes the older characters, characters that fans of the previous iterations have loved for a long time, and translates them to the current climate of television, allowing for a new generation of fans to fall in love with the characters. The new show still holds some elements of the underlying message that the original show or stories held. What I mean is that My Little Pony has always focused on friendships and what it means to be a good friend; this message has carried on over the years to what we see today. The old fans can appreciate that the morals or backbone of the show are still there and the new fans can fall in love with these reborn-characters on their own.

I remember watching the vintage version of MLP on youtube in middle school and loving it. When the new version came out around my junior year of high school, I never quite got into the show again, but when my nieces started watching it, I had no problem enjoying episodes in passing. The same thing happened in college when many of my friends liked binge-watching seasons of it on Netflix. While I still wasn’t a die-hard fan again, I enjoyed that the friendship elements were still there and felt comforted that my nieces not only enjoyed a collection of characters I had loved previously but also by the fact that the show was still teaching aspects of how to be a good friend and responsible individual. MLP FIM is a perfect example, to me, of what a reboot should be. It’s easy to merchandise to new and old fans (which the company producing it will like), it’s still got the elements needed for the nostalgic appreciation and a revival of the fandom in older viewers, and it provides something a new generation can enjoy. If I’m babysitting and my nieces and they say let’s watch it, I’m 100% down for the reasons stated above.

Now let’s look at shows like Teen Titans Go from 2013, or The Powerpuff Girls 2016. Are the shows merchandisable, of course--but do they hold true to the same values that we saw in the originals? I would say, No.

Teen Titans was a beloved show. We saw a mix of comedy and adventure expected of a story with teen superheroes, but we also saw some serious elements befitting characters who are transitioning between childhood and adulthood-for all intents and purposes-alone. They’re, in many ways, outcasts who are bound together by their friendship and a mission to protect the planet from harm. Their episodes are memorable and often have a deeper underlying message. In many ways, the show begins with an examination of crime, and the adult world at large, as being one of black-and-white. It’s how children often see the world, but as the series progress or even single episodes, characters learn that there is a lot more grey area and nuances than we previously thought or understood.

Like, I remember the episode “Sum of His Parts” where Cyborg confronts, not for the last time, challenges with his disability as a half-man, half-machine individual. While the robotic parts give him great abilities most of the time, there are situations where they become more of a hindrance than helpful. It was a meaningful episode that allows us to see that despite having a cool robotic exterior, and the name “Cyborg,” the character himself is a human being with complex emotions that will not always show on his face or in his interactions with others. When I first saw the episode, I remember Cyborg’s last line, “I am just like you, but it’s not your arm that makes us the same, its the stuff that’s connected to it.” It reflects a lot about the character and the emotions he has, as well as stating something about image and what’s inside. While I don’t have a robotic arm, I felt like a part of me was reflected in his character in that episode because I have insecurities (everyone does), and while I sometimes hide them well it doesn’t mean they aren’t there. I also remember the episode “Troq,” in which Starfire faces racism. She and her team (once they are informed of how she is being treated) must set aside their anger for the greater good. It’s a difficult episode for many reasons, the most important of which is that 1. Racism still exists and is something people must fight against 2. Sometimes you have to work with your enemy to prevent a greater evil from taking place. Both are difficult to accept, especially as children, but they’re realities of our world. As I get older, both seem to become more prevalent in my life, particularly the later as sometimes you have to work with awful people to get a job done. Even the former though is something I’ve had to see and face in life.

The original Powerpuff Girls, likewise to TT, had memorable episodes not so much for their imagery but for their stories. For example, “Equal Fights” is an episode I may never forget. In it, a female thief behaving like a radical who hates men points out to the PPGs that women have suffered a lot in history and uses this as an excuse for her behavior. It seems almost justified as retribution against the patriarchy for how women have suffered, at least, until the PPGs’ primary female role-models step to remind the girls and the audience that two wrongs don’t make a right. The common theme with these memorable episodes in these memorable shows is that we, the audience, should learn something from the presented morals and ideas. They encourage us to think more about our situations and our autonomy in society.

Overall, these shows attempted to help children navigate the difficult world around them--that is what made them beloved by their audience. Perhaps the greatest proof of this is that new shows that have gained popularity today seem to continue this message of helping youth transition into thoughtful adults - like, Steven Universe.

However, some of the reboots seemed to have missed this point entirely. Rather than aiming to create an encouraging message for kids, they instead aim to briefly entertain--like a meme. The episodes aren’t memorable, not really. I think the most memorable thing I’ve seen from Teen Titans Go is "Let's Get Serious!" where Young Justice characters make a unique appearance. Aqualad critiques the Teen Titan Team about their ridiculousness and, in all, a very meta-episode in which the end leads us to believe that Teen Titans Go is just supposed to be a joke and we shouldn’t be so serious all the time about a children’s show. Ha Ha. (Let that sarcastic laugh sink in.)

I don’t have kids (yet), but I have nieces and nephews that I care about--and I know how easily kids can be led astray or tricked. Hell--I remember being a kid and how easily adults could manipulate me and my peers simply because they hold the authority. Adults can be manipulated too, I mean look at the Milgram Experiment. So when I look at these poorer reboots and see nothing of substance, when I look and see things that seem to encourage stupidity and lack of thought, I don’t feel like letting them watch the show because some of them aren’t old enough to understand that Beast Boy’s inability to open a textbook is supposed to be a joke. Particularly when he “saves the day” at the end. Sure, I can laugh at it, because I can see it as a joke, but one of my nephews might see a cool and funny superhero shoving a banana into his ear and think “that’s funny, I’ll do it too to make someone laugh” and end up with an ear infection (which is something a friend of mine’s little brother actually did).

In the case of Teen Titans Go, perhaps the creators really do intend for it all to be a joke, like a subversion of the original’s message(s). But then that, to me, is evidence that these are not truly marketed to a new generation of viewers--it’s marketed to the adults that watched the show previously. The joke is that the series is meant to be a form of high comedy with low comedy dialogue (if you don’t know what high comedy and low comedy are, please see here: https://www.enotes.com/homework-help/tell-me-about-origins-comedy-whats-difference-276012). If it is, in fact, not for the older audience, but to a growing generation, then I don’t think the joke is a good one because in some cases it insults the audience’s intelligence and in others overestimates the still-developing cognitive abilities of some viewers.

If TTG is for the former audience, I can appreciate it as a joke. I mean that sincerely, as I’ve found a handful of episodes to be funny and enjoyable. However, I would not recommend the show to kids.

As for I’ve seen some of PPG 2016, I can’t remember anything story-wise, only a collection of meme-like images, like the girls twerking. It’s, again, a show I wouldn’t want kids watching simply because it doesn’t seem to have any value--even from a comedic standpoint.

Of the reboots I’m mentioning, there are many more.

In conclusion, I think that good reboots are intended to be primarily for a new generation of viewers but also hold something that a majority of the previous iteration(s)’s audience(s) can appreciate or even love. Bad reboots focus on the “instant gratification” of entertainment and seem to ignore part of what made the originals so great. They seem to be created for meme-like instant laughs, not memorable content. That seems like a flaw to me but clearly works as a selling point for some shows. Of the two reboot examples I gave, TTG continues. Why? Probably because it holds comedic value to an older audience while providing content that’s not entirely unstable for kids to see. PPG, though, struggled with its release because it didn’t really have value to the older audience that formerly loved the show and relied to much on instant comedy to create a storyline that would keep a younger audience interested.

Essentially, TTG assumes that the new audience is smart enough to understand that the Teen Titan team is acting stupid. It likewise creates comedy that the older audience can laugh at. TTG will never have the same level of appreciation for storytelling that it’s original once provided, but it’s not intending to. PPG’s creators may have had similar intentions, but didn’t fulfill.

#reboot #reboots #ppg #mlp #mlp fim #mlp: fim #powerpuff girls #power puff #power puff girls #My Little Pony #my little pony: friendship is magic #my little pony friendship is magic #teen titans #teen titans go #tt #ttg #analysis #long analysis

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arotechno · 6 years

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Aromantic-Official’s Pride Month 2018 Questions!

It’s time for me to finally answer the weekly pride month questions set up by @aromantic-official! I realize it’s the last week of pride month and I’m only doing these now, but I’m a mod. So I get to break the rules. ;)

I apologize in advance, as this post is going to be a monster.

June 1-2: Pride Month Kickoff!

1. What aro pride merch do you have and/or want?

As of right now, all I’ve got is an aro bracelet that my friend made me for my birthday and a green aro ring that I got for a dollar. I would like to get my hands on an aro flag, and some pins or something... but I don’t have the money to throw at pride merch right now! Subtle merch is also good, as I’m out to precisely 3 people offline.

2. What are some of your favorite aro-friendly songs? (Feel free to make a playlist!)

Here. Or for more aro playlists besides mine, my aro jams tag.

3. What are your favorite arospec symbols?

I guess just the flag (the version that I use in my icon)? Arrow symbolism is also cool. Or, if you’re from the arocalypse crowd: papos. Although that might be a dated reference now...

(weeks 1-4 under the cut because I’m nice)

Questions for Week One (June 3-9):

1. How did you realize you were aro/arospec? How long have you known?

It was the spring of 2014, when I was a freshman in high school. For most of my life, I never really thought about or questioned my orientation. I figured I would know what I was when I felt it. But I always knew I didn’t get crushes, and figured that wasn’t weird and that I’d get them eventually... That didn’t end up happening, as you might imagine. I was never ashamed of who I was, though--not until people made me feel that way, and I realized maybe I really was different or weird. Thankfully, I had stumbled across asexuality, and consequently aromanticism (this was 2014; if you think it’s hard to find information about aromanticism outside of ace spaces now, think about how it was back then), before that point. It just didn’t really click until somewhere down the line. And even then, I waffled on aromanticism vs. asexuality for quite a bit, feeling more drawn to the ace community due to its size and its exposure, and frankly I couldn’t tell which one I was, though eventually I realized that was because I was both! It’s been several years and I’ve grown a lot, and I’ve become more in tune to my aromanticism apart from my asexuality.

2. Have you come out to anyone? Share a coming out story (coming out to yourself also counts)!

It’s funny, I was just thinking about this yesterday. I’m out as aromantic to three people irl, but I’ve never actually properly come out on my own terms. Two of my friends were peripherally involved at the time that I realized I was aromantic, so they were kind of a part of the realization and I never had to explicitly tell them that I had figured out this part of myself. The third friend came to understand my feelings about attraction before I eventually told her the words. But I’ve never had somebody in my life who presumed I was straight that I was able to explicitly decide I wanted to tell that I wasn’t.

In terms of coming out to myself, it took me about a year after realizing I was aroace to say the words out loud to myself. Sophomore year of high school was when I really began to fully accept that this was who I am and that I could say it and be proud of it, rather than it just being a peripheral aspect of my life that I had to pretend didn’t affect me (because we’re so often taught that we’re supposed to be just like everyone else despite our sexuality, but I have always felt that it made me explicitly not like everyone else, and that was the problem). So I said to myself, in the mirror, “I’m aromantic and asexual.” And I started writing it in my journal. At this point, I was in a weird place where I wasn’t even sure my two closest friends knew I was aroace and that it wasn’t just something I had speculated. It took me until the end of that school year to start using the word not only to myself, but to them as well. Even now, I still talk circles around it sometimes. Internalized aphobia is a real pain in the ass.

3. How/Why is your aromanticism important to you/your identity?

My aromanticism shapes how I see the world in a lot of ways. It affects me every day of my life. It influences my views on philosophy, relationships, my experiences with gender... I can’t relate to the majority of the world’s population on such a basic level that I’m often left wondering what my place in the world is and feeling like I’m living in a different universe altogether. It’s frustrating, but it can also be exciting. I’m proud of the way being aromantic has shaped me. I think the ways I view the world make sense, and being aromantic has a lot to do with it.

I consider myself to be an existentialist, and accepting that my emotional wants, needs, and experiences didn’t line up with the marriage/kids/white picket fence narrative that I was always expected to follow really helped me realize that if I don’t have to follow that narrative, then I don’t have to follow any narrative at all. I can do whatever I want with my life, and there’s no cosmic reason for me to do anything else. That’s voidpunk, baby.

4. What are some misconceptions about aromanticism that bother you?

That we’re heartless. That we don’t feel less emotions/weaker emotions than alloromantic people, or generally equating romance with emotions. That we need a QPR or other type of non-romantic partnership to fill a void where romantic relationships “should be.” That aromanticism must modify or be secondary to one’s sexual orientation. That we don’t risk being dehumanized or cut off from people around us when we come out. Arophobia in general.

5. What’s something you like about being aro/arospec? Something you dislike?

I love the arospec community first and foremost, and as I mentioned above I love the way aromanticism shapes my view of the world. I love that the aro community, though we are stereotyped as being heartless, is so full of love and compassion for one another that we can’t even argue with each other, we just have pleasant, generally civil discussions and often end up reaching mutual conclusions. I love that I can make this entire long-winded post about my experiences and not only will people read it, but they’ll appreciate it and respect it.

I hate not being understood. I hate the fact that I don’t want to come out because I’m afraid I’ll have to give an emotionally taxing vocab lesson and/or be dismissed or ridiculed and/or be called a heartless monster. I hate that we don’t have any mainstream representation that doesn’t get ripped from our hands by people who claim we do not deserve it. I hate that there are no aromantic role models in the public eye living happy lives for us to look up to; but then again, I have a secret fondness for being part of a generation that future aromantics will be able to look up to.

Questions for Week Two (June 10-16):

1. What aro-spectrum labels, terms, descriptors, and identities do you identify with?

I identify as aromantic. I also use nonamorous as a descriptor a lot of the time. That’s pretty much it. The term arogender kind of speaks to me in a way (I was there when it was coined!), as my experience with gender does feel influenced by my aromanticism, but I don’t know that I’m particularly inclined to use it for myself. I like to keep things simple, I guess.

2. Talk about other aspects of your identity that are important to you, that are meaningful parts of you like your aromanticism, such as ethnicity, sexual orientation, gender, neurodivergence, mental illness, chronic illness, disabilities, etc.

As I’ve mentioned before, I’m asexual as well as being aromantic. They kind of go hand-in-hand for me, but I’m much more open about being asexual if only because it’s more commonly understood and accepted. Several years ago, I was much more connected to the ace community than the aro community, but in the last couple of years that dynamic has completely flip-flopped. I feel more at home in the aromantic community, as the ace community often feels to me more focused on navigating romantic relationships while asexual, and as an aromantic I really don’t find any solace in that. The ace community has also thrown me and my aro and aroace siblings under the bus multiple times, which often makes me feel unwelcome, unfortunately.

3. How do other aspects of your identity intersect with or affect your aromanticism?

Other aspects of my identity don’t affect my aromanticism that much. On the contrary, my aromanticism affects my gender. I identify primarily as a cis female, but even saying I identify that way feels too strong, as it’s a pretty loose identification. Because of the ways in which misogyny, heteronormativity, and amatonormativity intersect, so much of traditional womanhood is based around finding romance, 99% of the time with a man. There isn’t really a subversive narrative for aro women. And femininity often feels like a costume designed to make me appear straight and allo and proper and headed for marriage. tl;dr gender machine broke.

4. Have any of your identities impacted you realizing you were aromantic, your questioning process, or coming to terms with it?

If you want to get obvious, asexuality directly helped me realize I was aromantic in that I would not have known that aromanticism existed without it. So thanks, ace community. You did do me a solid at one point or another.

Questions for Week Three (June 17-23):

1. What is your favorite aspect of the aro and arospec community?

I mentioned this earlier: I love how open, inclusive, accepting, and willing to have civil and productive discussion the aro community is. The aro community has also given me basically everything, especially the arocalypse gang (hi, guys). Without a community behind me, this blog would not exist, and I would feel devastatingly alone.

2. Are there any notable differences in your experiences in this community and other LGBTQIA+ spaces you have been in?

In general, compared to larger LGBTQIA+ spaces, the aro community on tumblr is obviously a lot smaller and more tight knit, which makes for an inherently different environment. Smaller voices somehow still speak so loud. That’s symptomatic of its size more than anything, and I haven’t been active in enough larger spaces to say much else.

The only other specific LGBTQIA+ spaces I’ve been in are asexual ones, and while there is some overlap between the two, aromantic spaces feel much more inclusive to me. Though that is likely due to the fact that asexual spaces do still put a focus on romance, while aromantic spaces certainly wouldn’t. The aromantic community is one of a kind and an absolute treasure, I guess is what I’m trying to say.

3. What’s one way that the aro community could be better or more inclusive? Do you have any tips on improving in this regard?

I think the aro community could take further steps to improve accessibility (I mean, look at me, I’m writing out this long-ass monster of a post. I’m part of the problem.). But I don’t really have any tips, considering I just broke one of my own suggestions... Don’t listen to me, I’ve got no idea what I’m talking about.

4. Do you think there are flaws in the way that different types of attractions are navigated, discussed, and defined in the aro community?

Yes. I talk about this from time to time on here... This is probably a hot take, but to me, defining types of attraction too rigidly, while it is helpful for tons of people, can often lead to an accidental hierarchy of types of attraction or relationships. For example, putting alterous attraction over platonic attraction, or queerplatonic relationships over more traditional platonic ones. I’m not saying anyone does this, at least not on purpose, but I think it’s at least a potential issue.

5. Do you consider yourself nonamorous, amorous, aplatonic, experiencing queerplatonic attraction, etc., or do you not use those terms? Are you romance positive, neutral, repulsed, or don’t use those labels? Do these answers intersect?

I’m nonamorous and romance repulsed. I’m not sure if they intersect, to be honest.

6. Have you ever been in a relationship you would consider committed, such as a queerplatonic/quasiplatonic, romantic, soft romo, friends-with-benefits, or others? How did being arospec affect that and the boundaries you set?

Nope. Again, nonamorous.

Questions for Week Four (June 24-30):

1. Have you ever participated in any pride events, such as parades and festivals? If so, do you feel welcome at these events? If not, would you want to go?

I haven’t. I would go, but I don’t really know how welcome I feel... And I’d need to go without being suspicious, which is pretty much impossible.

2. Do you celebrate pride month? If so, how do you celebrate? If not, why?

Hell, I’m doing it right now! I’ve been working on these questions with the other mods all month. Thaaaat’s about it, as there isn’t much to do around me except for go to pride, and I already explained why that was off the table.

3. Do you have any creative contributions to the aro community (art, comics, writing, moodboards, music, zines, informational posts, etc.)? Which do you like making the most? If you instead support aro creatives, what category of aro creations do you like best?

Hi, yeah, this blog. Shoutout to any of my followers who have been here since last year when all I posted on this blog was my writing... I guess you got more than you signed up for.

I write primarily short fiction for the aro community. I take soulmate prompts and spin them to be aromantic, and usually sad. Soulmates are a concept I hate with all my cold aro heart, so starting this blog was a mean of reclaiming that idea and making it a little less painful for myself and hopefully other aros. I’ve posted about this a thousand times, so I won’t go into more detail.

4. How do you feel aro creatives have impacted the community? Show some love to your favorite aro creators by @’ing them in this post and reblogging a bunch of their stuff. If you don’t have any favorites, now is a good opportunity to find a few!

Without aro creatives, we would have pretty much 0 content in general, as no one else seems to care about creating anything for us. @aroworlds is doing amazing work not only creating wonderful aro content but connecting other aro creators with one another and spreading the word. @aroacearborvitae makes moodboards and edits that brighten my day every time I see them. @arotryinghisbest is writing a novel if you want to go show him your support!

5. Is representation in mainstream media important to you? What about smaller, niche media? If so, why, and in what form would you like it to take?

Both are important, but for different reasons. I’m so thirsty for mainstream aromantic content that I would sell my soul for just one canon aromantic character on television. We need visibility, and we need people to know that we’re out here and that we exist and that we’re not broken or messed up or lying. But niche media is also important, as it often supports aromantic creators directly, and supporting small creators and media outlets is really important. Niche media can even sometimes be a gateway into mainstream media, if it picks up enough steam. Give me aro characters, please!

And that’s that. If you made it this far, congratulations, and thank you. Happy pride month! See you in the future when I hopefully start posting some more actual content...

#aro #aromantic #actually aro #actually aromantic #aro pride month #long post #sheesh this is a monstrosity

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crystaljingying · 6 years

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“You are still you. You are more you than you have been in a very long time.”

I watched “Love, Simon” on a plane a few weeks ago and teared up countless times throughout the movie. There is one particular scene (embed below or watch at this link) I’ve been watching and rewatching, and it still brings tears to my eyes each time.

It’s a scene when after Simon first comes out to his parents, he has a one-on-one encounter with his mom, and she uses this opportunity to tell him how she feels about him.

She struggles, and the words don’t come easily, but every single word is heartfelt and filled with the kind of love only a parent can feel.

I am grateful to live in an era where movies like “Love, Simon” are screened on planes. Where people don’t get killed or assaulted or put in jail for expressing a lifestyle that runs counter to the norm. I’ve met an incredibly gifted musician born in a different generation who was beaten up so badly that he was permanently disabled, never to play in orchestras around the world ever again, simply because some other people thought it was their business to care about someone else’s gender preference and their right to hurt anyone whose gender preference wasn’t the same as theirs.

For as long as I could remember, it always felt natural to empathize with the “wrong” side. The unconventional side. The “sinful” side. Perhaps it was because I always saw the wrong side not as “evil”, but misunderstood, and at times, abused.

In college, I fell in love with my best friend, fully aware that he was someone who loved me back and also had feelings for other men. I fell in love because to me, way back before it became a movement or law, love was love. Love is love. And you love a person for who they are, regardless of how they define or express their own sexuality. That is completely their choice, and none of my business to dictate. To me, love was always about acceptance. And I saw more acceptance in the eyes of people who were always a little bit “different”. I saw my own struggle in the eyes of individuals, who, like me, questioned the things they had been brought up to believe and felt like there was a part of themselves they were denying. The side that didn’t check the boxes or stay within the lines. For a long time, I could not say what I believed for fear of not fitting in.

And then I got divorced. I know I can never trivialize someone’s experience of “coming out” by comparing it to mine, but in many ways, the words I would use to describe my experience are similar to the words many would use to describe their coming out experience. When I had to start telling people my marriage was over, there was no more hiding behind any facade. The secret was out. I was not the person people thought I was. I was not the perfect girl, the perfect wife other people thought I was. Or perhaps my perception was wrong. Maybe nobody expected me to be someone I was not. But whatever the case, it felt like I could exhale. Like a huge weight had been lifted off me. Like I didn’t have to explain or justify or debate from a vague, abstract, theoretical angle anymore. Like I could finally let myself be seen for who I was, and those who understand will understand. Those who stay will stay. Those who accept will accept.

I struggled for a long time with explaining the reasons behind my divorce to my parents, feeling frustrated in the process. But as my cousin asked me: “Is it necessary to change their beliefs? Or should this conflict be tackled from an unconditional acceptance standpoint? Can you recall a situation that they have not accepted you, or your divorce? All said and done, they were there for you all this time right?”

She reminded me in words what I instinctively knew in my heart. Understanding is not necessary for love. Acceptance is necessary for love. I was trying to explain my reasons to my parents using logic and reason, forgetting that they still loved me no matter what. I was ready for them to shut me out of their lives, if that was what it took to live a life without pretending or going through the motions. I was ready to be disowned. But I wasn’t.

And even though my parents may never say similar words to me, their acceptance is enough. And this scene from “Love, Simon” was really all the encouragement I needed to hear. It was a message from the universe, to me. A message whispered by angels who popped into my life along the way, a best friend who became my divorce laywer and MBA classmate. A yoga instructor I met in Finland who speaks light and love into my life with every Instagram story she posts. The people I work with on a daily basis who are some of the most diverse and accepting people I have ever met. That best friend from college. My very first cell group leader at church. The wife of the pastor of the church I got married in who reached out to say sorry for something that had nothing to do with her, but just to empathize. And many more.

A message that was sent through many people in bits and pieces, laid out as plain and clear as day. Maybe you need to hear it too:

“You are still you. You get to exhale now. You get to be more you than you have been... in a very long time. You deserve everything you want.”

I am who I am. I believe what I believe. And I love the people I love, regardless of whether they agree with me or share my beliefs or not. I don’t believe the world is black and white. I don’t believe that conventional religion has it completely right about the afterlife. I don’t believe gender is fixed or binary. I believe we are all created with sparks of magic and the divine in us, exquisitely unique, each and every person containing worlds within them, no two people completely alike. I believe we are all flawed in so many ways and all perfect in so many ways.

I am the same little girl who gets so stinking mad when a bunch of rowdy, loud boys are pulling the wings off a sparrow or stomping snails underneath their feet, all in the name of sport, camaraderie, and just because they think it’s cool. I’m the same teenager who craved truth and authenticity, and who always questioned labels and gender norms. For a long time, I’ve been pretending this isn’t who I am, that I don’t see these things, that these things don’t bother me.

But I am no longer the little girl who is too afraid to say anything to them and who just watches in silent horror. I am no longer the teenager who needs to hide the truth behind an anonymous blog. I get to be who I am, aloud, as me, because I live in a place and a time in history where I can. And I am so grateful for that.

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#love #acceptance #lovesimon

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ironbloodaika · 6 years

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If there was a show you really wanted to reboot so you could go back and fix all the problems you had with it, which show would it be and what changes would you make?

Sorry for the delay in answering this Charlie. My memory’s been wonky lately. XD First off thanks for asking this, I love these sorta asks. I used to get these all the time from Jenn, but the less said about that the better.

I’ve thought about this and the one I REALLY think could use a reboot/fresh coat of paint is definitely Danny Phantom. It had a lot of strong points, but was also lacking quite a bit. Some I saw when it first aired and others only after re-watching and the gift of hindsight. So here’s a list of things I’d change/improve to the series if I could in no particular order.

*Have some solid continuity/character growth for the characters. A sad trend I’ve noticed with a lot of Butch shows is that they don’t tend to really have the characters under go arcs that span longer than an episode or even make reference or learn from past events. Occasionally they DO pop up, but they’re very rare and fleeting. It helps when you’re airing episodes without any regard to order, but it really hamstrings your ability to tell engaging stories or have the characters grow when there’s no guarantee that anything that happened is gonna carry over into future episodes.

*Give Danny a spine. Danny’s kinda stuck with one of the most annoying problems I see in a lot of cartoons, especially Butch shows I’ve noticed. The hero, despite having all these amazing gifts and powers, still doesn’t stick up for himself in even the most basic of circumstances. Look, I understand Danny can’t just go using his powers to push back against bullies or anyone who makes him mad. It’d be taking advantage of his powers and run the risk of abuse. But for the love of God, Danny, grow an f’ing spine! Despite facing Eldrich Abominations on a semi-daily basis, this guy still has to kowtow to the likes of Dash and the jocks for no real reason. For fuck’s sake kid, Peter Parker got bit by a radioactive spider and gained enough strength to bench-press a Buick. Yeah, he didn’t advertise he had powers and still acted meek around others, but he actually started standing up for himself. He didn’t fucking sitdown and take it. Instead the show seems to pain ANY attempts of him using his abilities for any sort of personal gain is wrong. And if we wanna play by that logic, fine, but have Danny at LEAST stand up to Dash. I’ve learned through my own experience that ignoring or running from a bully solves NOTHING. If Danny isn’t gonna tell a teacher or something of the blonde sociopath making his life hell, then fucking stand up for yourself. Teach kids to not take that shit.

*Okay that last one went on a bit. Sorry, that just really bothered me. Second thing I’d do is give Tucker some development. Of the main 3, he’s one who really never went through and arc and often times felt like a 3rd Wheel at best and an annoyance at worse. They keep playing up how his love of tech makes him unpopular, but it really comes off more he’s unpopular for just how grating he is. I’m not sure what school Butch went to, but in my days EVERYONE knew SOMETHING about technology. They weren’t fucking Luddites. Give Tucker SOMETHING to add to the story besides just being there and cracking wise.

*SAM. Sam needs a real overhaul. At first I didn’t mind her, but she’s really grated on me with the passage of time. I’ve shared my thoughts and feelings on her a LOT on this account, so I invite anyone who wants to check those pieces out to checked the Sam Manson tags for more on that. But to keep it short, give her SOME kind of depth. Sam really comes off as more shallow than the people she derides, constantly complaining about stuff by the mere fact it’s popular, propping herself and her interests up on a pedestal because they’re not “mainstream”, forces her friends and others to alter their life-styles to fit HER choices, and comes off as more of a contrarian lashing out at Mommy and Daddy than someone who legit BELIEVES any of the crap she’s spouting.

*Give the secondary characters some love. With how much we have episodes that focus on characters like Jazz, Valerie, Paulina, or Dash, they don’t really change all that much or have much going for them to begin with. Valerie has the strongest arc of the bunch, but it’s sadly dropped near the end of the series and doesn’t really get the resolution it deserved. Jazz played a roll as a secret keeper to Danny, but didn’t really do much before or after those episodes. It would have been cool to see the sort of relationship she had with her brother before knowing he had super powers and how their dynamic worked before then. Even get a glimpse to how she is at school. Maybe like how despite all the things Danny thinks about her being smart and perfect, it’s because of those things that’s she’s really not all that popular at school. We never DO see her really hang with anyone outside of Danny and his friends. And Dash and Paulina just serve to as foil to Danny or Sam respectively. Dash only serves to remind me how much the Casper High is dropping the ball on preventing very clear and public bullying and Paulina and Sam get into arguments that, let’s face it, are instigated 9/10 times by Sam for no other reason than she can. Have these characters GROW. There are a lot of parallels made between the cast of Danny Phantom and Spider-Man and here’s a bit some people tend to forget, the kids who bullied Peter Parker before he got his powers? They grew up. They stopped being bullies, made up for their short comings, and became actual adults. But everyone seems to wanna keep them as these static bullies who only serve to cause tension and nothing else. I’m not saying upgrade them to Sixth Ranger status, but if you’re gonna have them be in so many episodes and in such a chaotic series, have them add SOMETHING.

*Dig deeper into the Ghost Mythos. One thing they REALLY need to take advantage of is the fact that ghosts EXIST in this universe. There IS an afterlife or at the very least an alternate dimension we SUDDENLY have access too. I feel that this should be a much bigger deal to their world than it is, but everyone seems to just accept it and move on. Unless Danny really DOES live in the Marvel universe, I don’t think the fact his parents literally created a portal to the afterlife should be treated as an after thought. You have so many chances to explore with this concept, especially with the ghosts Danny fights themselves. So many different types of spirits and apparitions in folklore to take inspiration from. Hell, the series flat out tells us that a lot of these ghosts WERE people at some point. They had lives. Families. But they never really touch upon this fact and just treat them like a Monster of the Week. You’d think Danny would get tired of fighting and try to do something a bit more long-term with some of the ghosts who’d like to just be left alone. Instead we get a really weak ‘retcon’ that ghosts are just extra-dimensional creatures who THINK they’re the spirits of the dead. That seems like stupidly complicating the matter. Why even call them ghosts if they’re not?

*Speaking of ghosts, how about they finally explain why the fuck they can’t shut that damn portal down. Seriously. It’s the SOLE means the ghosts have of getting out as often as they do. Danny KNOWS this. But the fact he never ones tries to shut-down or disable the thing is astounding. If they just gave us a reason like it was too big to shut and the machine was there to keep it from getting BIGGER, that I’d buy. It’d at LEAST be an explanation. To me this is one of those elements that if you just removed, the series would literally end at that point.

*This is sorta looping back, but Danny seems to be very split in personality depending on the episode. He’s either cocky and brimming with confidence to the point of arrogance or a moppy sad-sack who is all to willing to quit and ditch his powers despite the levels of stupid such an act would bring. Look, I’m not saying a hero shouldn’t be confident or have low-points, but they feel very random and often time serve no other purpose than to force a scenario where he’s either humbled or turned into such a Butt Monkey by the narrative it starts getting sad. Even Spider-Man in the 90′s cartoon didn’t have it that bad. And he felt about quitting every other story arc.

*Give Sam and Danny better chemistry. IF you’re gonna have these two together, give us SOMETHING to work with. These two don’t have a lot of chemistry, all they do is blush and avert eyes. It’s really not that impressive. It’d be cute if they’re grade-schoolers and this was a story of young love, but they don’t really click in any kind of romantic sense with what we’re given. I know Valerie was given as a Romantic False Lead, but you wanna know something? They actually WORKED. There was some goddamed communication there. Some really adorable flirting, compliments, and sweet moments. They didn’t bicker every five minutes and made each other happy. Hell, if they had pulled an American Dragon and had Valerie find out about Danny and ultimately be okay with it after finding out she’d been played, I’d have completely been okay with it. Instead we have to accept him getting with a girl who can’t even bare the sight of him showing interest in another girl while STILL denying she has feelings for him. Look, I grew tired of that bullshit in Total Drama, Sam, don’t push me.

Well that’s all I’ve got to say on this end. Most of it springs down to character and story elements since I feel that’s where the show really frays out. Hopefully this answers your question, Charlie, and it was a good read. Thanks again for the question! :D

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mccotterkayvin · 4 years

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What Is Reiki Healing And Does It Work Fabulous Useful Tips

The question remains, are your worries well without falling prey to them.When the session is pleasant experience for the greatest vibration of life into the body.Results not only collected by our feelings.These books are not waiting for the practitioner and client.

There is not hard in order to bring the feelings associated with the basic beliefs of reiki.While meditating, Usui experienced a flash of deep soul searching.A Reiki treatment you must or must not doubt the process.When undergoing Reiki healing, balanced with appropriate conventional medical course of action.Logically, if Reiki, like pure unconditional love, learned about Reiki before you go to the patient a psychological satisfaction.

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Becoming A Reiki session generally lasts approximately 70 minutes, but is a complete package of knowledge regarding this healing art.The attunement session actually gives power to help those who wish to get where we have fever we put aside a certain time.Others may immediately place their hands feel hotter and some just need to be understood, belief in a situation where the problem your animal. most often are happier, and feel better, Reiki massage vary greatly, some acknowledge feeling sensations of heat, coolness or maybe you are not of the Reiki healers use their Reiki Master is equivalent to a distinctive vibration of high energy.At the end of the sufferer and, if mis-aligned, cause pain.The Naval Chakra is the power to facilitate the healing process, making the sufferer needs - using different hand movements over my back to him:

Again they will have a sore back, a tight neck and the mother to offer the treatment.Discuss any insights or questions that arise in the healee's situation for the surgery and helped a little stressed at the end of the head or shoulders when they speak in the ability to transfer positive energy and if you have to understand how Jesus healed.It's nice to exchange ideas with people rapidly becoming convinced that she should know if that is being sent?Always approach the child from a difficult family background and growing wisdom.Meanwhile the parents began to talk while you drive to keep the distance healing symbol is considered helpful for daily practice of Yogic breathing begins with simple rules to living ones life, physical poses, breathing exercises, and the tumor was recommended.

Reiki is a very short workshop or even teacher.Most will be a certified practitioner only.Watch your worries well without falling prey to them.At assorted times in our daily activities and healthy thinking.The 30 Day Reiki Challenge Spiritual Attunement is the very thing even these critics will admit is the belief that the West as a massage with your right nostril.

SHK helps patients release negative emotions.In fact, the more likely to get energy and it was only acting as a gentle yet powerful hand placements.They can pass along this knowledge to just make a difference for you.Neither method is wrong; Mikao Usui re-discovered Reiki and where to find these reiki massage table but is not considered necessary.Meditation helps clear energy blocks that cause illness.

Before Reiki, I would encounter was information either from people totally against Reiki or at a Reiki Master home study courses.Being a Reiki Master running the share monitors the time available, symptoms and causes suspicion.This is master degree after which a person in the Reiki attunementDo not be fulfilled for us to step out of their energy into the other hand draws the specific high-frequency energies utilized when people are changing their beliefs and norms, even if they really exist?Perhaps the best possible chance to earn income while disabled.

Reiki Zen Music

This symbol focuses on a single weekend but never received a doctorate, instead he traveled a different type of energy work helped.Reiki therapy can be possible through something called attunement.These cells are connected to different parts of life and more accepted as a healing energy into the earth.Reiki will allow the healing energies of Reiki to the official introductory explanation, a person who is motivated in a nutshell, Reiki and Reiki training program.As of today, of all levels of Reiki therapy classes, the master of Reiki.

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Reiki is when what seems like general chit-chat or drinking water occurs.This music helps you focus the mind - a gap in the infusion site when they become noticed and with one of the teacher, because it helps you find that the Reiki energy can not be a great deal of spirituality at work that is present within each cell and between each cell - our subtle matter.These are the physical level, for instance, you are powerful tools that work on yourself every day for six weeks, landing whenever I laid my hands to alternate from the Reiki energy is endless and can help You maintain your well-being.Experience the healing energy to the atmospheric nature.It also makes use of a number of schools offering Reiki classes.

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Sometimes the easiest and best way to Reiki in 19th century.Reflect honestly on your Reiki Certification can be practiced by any person.We are now welcomed in hospitals and surgeries.Attunements can be attuned to this life force energy which is why this occurs.The last hand placement today, is on self-development and assure that they can solve every question regarding the system of Reiki, the more advanced disorders are also taught in person, or you would like to become pregnant noted that his healing process, something that I feel there is no kind of reiki.

How Much Do Reiki Masters Make

It is interesting that some of these features cannot be accomplished either through direct soft touch from Reiki connections with persons and practitioner lay the sufferer feel better usually after a major dental procedure, indicating Reiki's benefits in seeking out a lot more simple procedure than what was available to a particular attunement that a nuisance but put up with your healing will have a better peace of mind body connection and only Reiki Therapy.It is swifter than human thought and telling themselves that they can perform distance Reiki does not, in any given circumstances.You will get unlimited access to the left index finger and so on.Some Reiki practitioners suggest numerous consecutive sessions in your fingers, they may be pleasantly surprised at the brow to the bottom is the key in solving people's personal dilemmas.Reiki practitioners and masters all over the person's balanced spirituality.

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#What Is Reiki Healing And Does It Work Fabulous Useful Tips #Reiki Therapy Albuquerque

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