“Beata Maria.”
What a wonderful blessing upon this hopelessly sinful world.
... What's this?
A gathering of powerful and prideful individuals can only spell trouble.
Sitting at a table, surrounded by them, exerted an immense pressure upon the room. The air seemed to thin, made icy and oppressive by those in attendance, representatives of their own domains. The dorm leaders were like kings perched upon their thrones, prepared to cross words or swords at a moment's notice. (For what it was worth, at least Kalim was a spot of sunshine in the otherwise strained space.)
Raven had been scribing for these occasions for months now, and still hadn't become fully accustomed to the atmosphere. Inevitably, some petty squabble, underhanded comment, or personal vendetta would disrupt the proceedings. If they were lucky, they'd escape with just some unresolved tension in the air. She took care to leave those instances out of the meeting notes.
Today, the attention was directed toward the front of the room. The headmaster consulted a packet as he crowed on.
“The final topic on our agenda is... Next week, we will be hosting an important guest from Noble Bell College to discuss future joint events. As a show of good will, I would like their representative to be granted a tour of our campus. This tour guide will then also serve as their chaperone for the duration of our guest's stay to ensure that they are comfortable and that all of their questions are promptly answered."
A hand shot up automatically.
"Yes, Rosehearts-kun?"
"If that is the case, sir, then I believe it would be wise for you to serve as this tour guide," the redhead suggested. "You are knowledgeable about our school's history, layout, staff, and curriculum. Therefore, you easily fulfill your own requirements."
There was a round of murmurs and nods from around the table.
"No, no!" Crowley insisted with the shake of his head. "I have many other duties to tend to as headmaster! What's more, it would be more fitting that someone on our guest's level—a fellow student—be the guide! This will better bolster a sense of camaraderie between the student bodies of our schools!"
... In other words, you don't wish to do the work yourself, Raven sighed, already having seen through her guardian's excuses. From the grimaces on everyone else's face, she deduced that they, too, had suspected as much.
Azul laced his fingers together and surveyed the room. "Well then, do we have any volunteers from amongst ourselves?"
"Pass." Leona leaned back in his chair with a grimace. "I'm not up for kissing ass."
"May I take that to mean that you are avaliable, Leona-san?" Azul pressed, still smiling.
"I said, pass," he snarled. "Don't make me repeat myself again."
"... Point taken. Anyone else?"
"I would offer, but... There is an unbirthday party scheduled the day of their arrival. I don't believe I would be able to fully commit myself to chaperoning our guest," Riddle confessed. "I cannot override the rules written by the Queen of Hearts."
"I, as well, am preoccupied. I'm to shoot for a magazine spread after class," Vil added, tucking a finger under his chin. "What about you, Azul? This is a prime opportunity to... as Leona so crudely put it, curry favor with another school of magic. I can't imagine that you wouldn't immediately jump at the chance."
"My, to think that my upperclassmen think so little of my intentions..." Azul sniffled dramatically—an innocent act. "Unfortunately, I have a prior arrangement to oversee at the Mostro Lounge during the visiting period. I would otherwise happily accept this honor!"
"Of course you would," Riddle and Vil said at once.
"Hey, hey, guys! It's no problem! I can show them around! I've done it plenty for our guests back home," Kalim chirped, leaping out of his seat.
"Can Jamil-san confirm that your schedule is clear?" Azul inquired, eyebrow quirked. "It would be a stain upon my... excuse me, I mean Night Raven College's reputation if we were unable to safely secure this relationship."
"Huh? Well, sure I can ask him."
Kalim produced a phone dressed up in a gold case studded with gemstones. He typed up a text message, and received a reply just as fast. His face slowly fell. "Uh-oh, uh..."
"Yes?" Azul prompted.
"Jamil says it's a no-go. He has to tutor me for a big midterm exam on Monday..." Kalim quickly perked up again. "But it's okay! We still have Idia, right?"
"L-Leave me out of this!!" came Idia's stuttering voice from a floating tablet. "I-I didn't ask to pick up a side quest that no one else wants to fulfill! I want nothing to do with this, do you hear me?!"
"Hah!" Leona let out a sharp bark of laughter. "You think that wimpy daikon radish sprout can keep himself together long enough to entertain an esteemed guest?"
"I-It's true!" Idia agreed. "I-I spend most of my time trapped inside my room! I've barely stepped outside to see the light of day or the campus for myself! I'm super anti-social and hate irl people!! Th-There's no way I can socialize or give a halfway decent tour!!"
"Willfully talking yourself down to that extent... Have you no dignity left?" Vil groaned. "Safe to say, we cannot rely on a man with no confidence for a matter as important as this."
"Then all that's left is..."
Everyone's eyes collectively drifted to the seventh and unoccupied dorm leader seat at the table.
"Great. It's decided, then. It'll be the lizard's gig," Leona smirked, seemingly satisfied with the outcome.
"Is it really okay to make the decision without Malleus here?" Kalim asked—the only one truly concerned about him.
"No, this is unacceptable," Riddle pointed out. "There tends to be miscommunication when information is relayed to Malleus. We cannot afford such mistakes if we wish to forge a healthy, sustainable relationship with Noble Bell College. We must entrust this task to an individual who is punctual, polite, welcoming, detail-oriented, and an eloquent speaker."
In this pool of candidates? Good luck with that. Raven scrawled down Riddle's last remarks, dotting the period with pessimism.
"Oh dear, oh dear," Crowley fretted to himself. "What to do? We've already run through you boys and no one is quite free or suitable for the role..."
"What if we were to put out a call to action, headmaster?" Raven offered, glancing up from her parchment. "I know that our students aren't the most open to extending their hands, but perhaps someone will volunteer for the task if you offer some kind of compensation."
"Oogh... The compensation would have to be fairly generous to spark interest and enthusiasm this close to the visit..." Crowley lamented. "Woe is me!! Wherever can I find such a magnanimous individual on such short notice?!"
"There, there. It will sort itself out, you'll see." Raven smiled sympathetically and patted her uncle on the back. "If you'd like, I can get started by drafting the document for your approval."
"My, how very kind of you, my dear!! That's what I like to hear!! Where would we be without your astute…”
The headmaster's gushing suddenly quieted, his once-panicked expression settling into thoughtfulness. Crowley's beady, golden gaze bore right into his child.
"... Why are you looking at me like that?"
"I think," Crowley said slowly, "we've found the answer to our prayers. The perfect person for the job, in fact!"
"... You have?"
"Dear, sweet Raven-kun," Crowley drawled in a singsong, "my adorable niece, apple of my eye, sweetest of songbirds—”
A smile grew on the headmaster's lips. Heat from all corners of the meeting room concentrated on her. Collective realization.
Raven puffed with indignation. "You are NOT seriously suggesting what I think you're suggesting, Uncle!! I'm here to keep records, not to fill in for the duties of the dorm leaders!”
"Yet you've been present for all of our meetings, Raven-san," Azul cooed. "You are privy to all the same information that we are, and have already proven yourself to be reliable when it comes to your work. I also understand that you're quite the student among the first years."
"Where did you hear that from?!"
"I have my sources." Azul raised his voice to address the other dorm leaders. "Gentlemen, don't you agree that Raven-san would be a most wonderful choice for the task at hand?"
"Heh, so this is where we're going with this?" A dry chuckle escaped Leona. "Fine by me."
"She would be our best option," Vil added. "Her manners are passable. She presents herself well enough."
"A-As long as it's not me! I'm up for anyone else!!"
"Azul..." Riddle frowned disapprovingly. "While I can't say I condone your methods, it seems we're left with little choice in this matter."
"Gosh, it's so nice of you to step up for us, Raven!" Kalim graciously beamed.
"W-Wait just a second here! I haven't agreed to anything yet!! Don’t I get a say in this?!” Raven protested, abruptly rising. She shuddered upon feeling a clawed hand clap her back.
“Our hopes are riding on you, Raven-kun!!” Crowley cheerily declared. “Go out there and make our Night Raven College look good!!”
"I'm so glad we came to an agreement." Azul's lip curled back into a triumphant smirk. "May I be the first to offer my congratulations? Ah, and I think I speak for all of us when I say... best of luck with handling our special guest."
"Wow, that's amazing, Raven!! Congratulations!!" Kalim squealed, his eyes sparkling with genuine joy.
"Yeah, congrats," Leona yawned. "Knock'm dead, canary."
"Congratulations, potato. Be on your best behavior now."
"Raven, congratulations. I expect you to perform well, or it's off with your head. Is that understood?"
"Congrats, LMAO. Sux 2 b u rn. GL, hf, don't die!!"
It felt as though the room was shrinking in on her, blocking off all exits and routes of escape. A circle of arbiters, already having settled the raven's fate long ago. Her left eye twitched.
"I can see that none of you are willing to let me worm my way out of this," she said warily. "Absolutely awful, all of you..."
"Why, that's exactly what makes you the ideal person for the job, my dear niece!" Crowley aggressively ruffled Raven's hair, making it stick up like feathers plugged into an electrical socket. "It's your kindness and willingness to help those in need. You must have gotten it from me, fufu!"
"Highly doubtful. I almost feel sorry for the poor, unfortunate soul being sent here... He has no idea what's in store for him."
Crowley blinked. "Oh, did I fail to tell you all? The student representative from Noble Bell College is..."
Night had descended upon Night Raven College. Darkness heralded twinkling stars, shadows, and secrets hidden in its depths. This was the height of mystique—and he, mystique manifest, walked along that darkness, finding comfort in it.
"... So this is where you were. I knew I’d find you out and wandering about again.”
Malleus turned.
A short figure had appeared behind him, the jacket hanging off of his shoulders flapping in a steady breeze. In the dark, his eyes were bright rubies—striking against the lucid, opal moonlight. He smiled, displaying fangs.
"Lilia."
He skipped to Malleus’s side. "Didn’t you have a dorm leader meeting to attend?"
The prince’s brow furrowed. "Is that today?"
"It was today," Lilia gently corrected him. “Well, it's long since over.”
A frown formed. “That is... rather unfortunate. I had been looking forward to the discussing how to best demonstrate our hospitality to the student from beyond Sage's Island."
“Chin up, Malleus!" Lilia reached into his back pocket and produced a scroll tied with a midnight blue ribbon. “I have the meeting notes passed along from the headmaster’s child—you remember the little raven, don't you? With this, you’ll be able to get up to speed on the discussion in no time."
“The raven? Yes, that would be the young Crowley you speak of. I shall have to express my gratitude to her at a later time. It is in part through these records that I remain informed in spite of my absences."
Malleus accepted the paper from his vice dorm leader, tugging the ribbon and letting the page unfurl. He immediately began poring over its contents, a finger following each line of text he took in. A review of the quarterly budget, consideration for expanding the cafeteria menu to include more vegetarian options, important upcoming events...
“Shall we make her an honorary knight for all her troubles? Send a thank-you card? Invite her to tea?”
“We are nowhere that friendly. Merely acquaintances.”
“That’s too bad. She seems like an sharp girl. A little high-strung, but nice.” Lilia curiously rocked back and forth on the balls of his feet. “You, Sebek, and Silver attended that masquerade in the City of Flowers together, didn’t you? I imagine you’re already thick as thieves. How good for you all! I wish I had been there too.”
Malleus’s lip curled at the mention of the masquerade. “A great many things happened then. I was certainly taken aback by the young Crowey’s conviction when she was faced with grave danger.”
… That danger had been himself.
A memory flashed through his mind—four figures, clustered around a book. The distressed cries of a raven calling out, and the cold, steely roar of the dragon that countered it.
“We must stop him from tainting his own soul. We must!!“
“Rest assured, we will stop him. When the time comes for me to exact my revenge... Pray that you do not stand between myself and Flamme. I cannot guarantee your safety if you were to get caught in the crossfires.”
“But he’s…!!”
“Suffering? He has deceived me and threatened the safety of my people. They will suffer too if he is not stopped. His is a story that will end in fire. There can be no other ending. If it comes down to life or death, I will do what I must to secure Briar Valley’s future.”
“It won’t come to that, it can’t! I…! I won’t let that happen! A-Absolutely not, even if it’s Malleus-senpai…!”
“You would grant your enemies clemency? Then you are a fool.”
“I-I believe… everyone deserves a second shot at their happily ever after!! S-So even if I’m scared and want to run away… e-even though I know I can’t beat you in a fight… I’m a fool who wants to defend that belief until the bitter end!!”
"My, so she’s fiery one! I’ve yet to see many defiant enough to stand against you. It’s a good thing you didn’t flambé her.”
“She looked as though she was going to pass out from fright.”
“Even better!!” Lilia clapped his hands in delight. "Ooh, I’d love for you to have such an amusing friend.”
Malleus was nearly done with the notes now. As he neared the end of the paper, the subject shifted to that of a special guest. The odd raven, that guest’s guide and attendant.
He stopped, his finger hovering over the final bullet point on the page.
"What's this? The visiting student will be from Noble Bell College... and his identity…” The prince fell silent. Seriousness had seized control of his features.
“Malleus…? What’s wrong?”
Lilia looked over in concern. What he found was a dark, mischievous smile slowly spreading across Malleus’s face. For a brief moment, he felt as though he had just stared into an abyss—and the abyss had stared back in all of its wickedness.
“Fufufu… Now this will certainly be fun."
177 notes
·
View notes
Comfort Films Tag
Rules: List 7 of your comfort movies, then tag 7 people.
Tagged by @callipigio
1 - Shelter (2007)
I often joke around here about how I’ve been watching queer cinema for over half of my life at this point, and it’s easy to recommend this film. This is a coming of age film about a guy who gave up art school to become the primary breadwinner and caregiver for his family. However, when the older brother of his best friend returns to their town to collect himself, our artist and he reconnect and find something special between them. Great use of a young actor in this shores up the caregiving aspects.
I’m probably going to rewatch it now. Because it was produced by Here! TV, you can only legally watch it via a subscription to their platform. I own it on DVD because I fell in love with it and knew I needed to keep it forever.
2 - Big Eden (2000)
Big Eden. Oh, Big Eden. This is the film equivalent of a warm blanket and a tight hug. It’s about an artist named Henry Hart, who is preparing for a big exhibition in New York when he’s called back home to Montana because his uncle has had a stroke. We are greatest with the most queer-friendly town to ever exist as Henry manages his old angst about his straight best friend as the local general store owner also secretly pursues him. It’s absolutely lovely.
3 - The Blues Brothers (1980)
Luna has great taste, because this is one of the best films ever made. What was originally just an SNL bit turns into a fun road film about getting the band back together so that two brothers can raise enough money to pay the back taxes owed by the orphanage they grew up in. We also run over Illinois nazis in this movie and demolish dozens of cop cars. Cab Calloway, James Brown, Carrie Fisher, Chaka Khan, Paul Reubens, and Aretha Franklin are in it. John Candy orders orange whips. This is the kind of film I would watch with my dad any time it was on.
4 - Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World (2003)
This is one of the most man movies ever made. I don’t know any woman who wants to sit down and watch this film, but me and boys will spend an entire afternoon on this film in a heartbeat. The sexual tension between Russell Crowe’s and Paul Bettany’s characters goes unremarked on this website in a way that lets you know for sure this hellsite is dominated by femmes, because those two have definitely fucked. At least twice. It’s 1805 and oceans have become battlefields!
5 - Clue (1985)
A movie based on the board game of the same name should not have been this good, but it instead goes on to become a camp masterpiece. Many people will end up remembering Tim Curry for Rocky Horror or even Muppet Treasure Island, but this is still one of his favorite performances for me. This film is batshit and I love it.
6 - Camp (2003)
Speaking of camp films, let’s talk about one of the best of all time. I know we often talk about the bad singing in Thai BL, but I unironically love all of the musical theater in this film. I regularly listen to this soundtrack, and have been for over 15 years. It’s a film about a bunch of weird theater kids who get to escape the bullying and hellishness of their lives for a few weeks during the summer, where they get to put on a bunch of classic plays. It’s so camp. I love this film because it was difficult for me to find queer films that had happy components with them, and this little movie has a wide array of queer kids in it.
7 - Make The Yuletide Gay (2009)
This was the first queer film I ever watched that had a happy ending that was also a comedy. Prior to this, I think I had watched Beautiful Thing (1996), Edge of Seventeen (1998), Get Real (1998), and Bent (1997). Most of those films ended resolved or sad. Yuletide is a silly little gay film of almost nonstop innuendo about a guy who goes back into the closet when he returns home for Christmas, but hijinks ensue when his boyfriend shows up unexpectedly. It’s an annual watch for me around the holidays, and I usually host people for it.
Also, Adamo Ruggiero is in it! He played Marco on Degrassi: The Next Generation.
This was fun! I think most folks have been tagged that I know, but I’ll tag @warningtothecurious. If anyone else does this, please tag me back if you do this! I want to know what films you all return to.
177 notes
·
View notes
RETURNING HOME
Natasha Romanoff x Reader
Request: Nope :)
Summary: After a long mission Natasha wants to cook for her returning girlfriend, but... things go wrong. This is a short one but hope you enjoy 👍
Warnings: feelings of low self-esteem; mentions of Six of Crows; unedited chapter
Word Count: 1,1K+
Natasha was an agent. A spy. A former assassin. An Avenger. She was an idol for countless S.H.I.E.L.D. trainees and agents alike, tough, smart, seductive, everything. She could do anything she willed herself to do. Anything she wanted to be able to do.
At least that's what she was telling herself.
At three in the afternoon she had decided she would cook one of her girlfriend's favourite Indian curries; Aloo Gohbi. Two hours she had struggled with the relatively simple dish. In ten minutes (y/n) would be there, and then it would be too late.
She told herself all it took was one more try. One more go. Or at least she could speed-clean the kitchen so that she would never know Natasha tried in the first place.
But she had failed. She had failed her girlfriend and herself.
Sighing, she leaned back against a counter, involuntarily sniffling as she observed the mess before her. Pots and pans lay discarded all along the stove and sink, bowls and cutlery spread throughout the room, painting a rather chaotic picture.
Natasha groaned, cupping her face in her hands as she felt her eyes tear up. You had recently convinced her to read some of your favourite books, and due to the lack of work she was experiencing lately - not that she was complaining - she may or may not have twisted down the rabbit hole of fantasy and romance novels.
Now perhaps reading depictions of romantic sweetness and sexual tension followed by a book such as Six of Crows sure to awaken her belief in the old saying memento mori, a reminder that we shall all die, wasn't the best course of action and might have had something to do with the stray tears coursing down her cheeks.
But while the recent fictional dramatics certainly didn't help, Natasha could tell her desperation stemmed from a far older need to please. To be good enough. To manage everything.
And while she found it almost silly that this led her to cry over inedible or burnt curry, sometimes emotion simply worked that way.
A knock on the door startled her out of her frozen state, leading her to scurry along the tiled and wooden floor to meet you.
"Tasha? It's me. Codeword's 'There's a package from the Lemon Tree for you'. You home?"
Natasha fumbled with the doorknob for a prolonged moment before ripping it open, immediately being engulfed by your arms.
"Hey, Natty," you whispered into her ear, kissing her temple. "I've missed you so much."
"I've missed you, too. Come in, it's scorching hot out here." You smiled as she led you in, quickly past the kitchen, into the living room, pointedly ignoring your mumbled 'only 32 degrees...'.
"You've cut your hair!" you gasped, running your fingers through the red strands. "And you had your nails done and- Darling, why are your eyes red?"
Your tone and expression morphed to a concerned one and Natasha blinked quickly in hopes of erasing evidence, but it was too late.
"No, they're not. I mean, if they are, I don't know why. They don't hurt or anything." She still marvelled at how her ability to lie to you always amounted to near nothing.
"Tasha," you repeated firmly, awaiting a more substantial answer.
"I... look in the kitchen if you must." You hesitated, contemplating asking her to tell you herself, but eventually decided it wasn't necessary.
You gently took her by the hand, guiding her back to the kitchen where you wrapped an arm around her waist, surveilling the damage with mild surprise.
"It smells nice," you commented playfully, making her groan, burying her face in your neck. "Was this for me, baby?"
"Yeah... It was... supposed to be aloo ghobi and dal. And some rice. I'm not sure where I went wrong." You slowly moved about a bit with Natasha still clinging to your side, looking at the pans.
"Well, the rice is good, just not basmati rice, so that's unusual... The dal is fine, just a little burnt, and the curry..." Natasha had perked up beside you, looking hopeful at the optimistic descriptions of her dish.
You popped a potato from the pan into your mouth and struggled to swallow, eyes widening at the extreme overdose of salt and cardamon.
"Um... the aloo ghobi might be beyond saving. But that's okay, because guess what?" You turned to her triumphantly, smiling broadly at her.
"...What?" she asked carefully, eyes squinting.
"I wasn't expecting this, so I took the liberty of bringing takeout with me. And... it just so happens to be Indian curry. So we now have a ton of rice, but that should be fine."
Before you could even entirely finish your thought, she had wrapped her arms around your neck, laughing gently at the coincidental luck.
"That's pretty good, innit, love?" you cooed, brushing some hair behind her ear. "Now, why don't you sit down, I'll get that and my suitcase, yeah?"
She nodded enthusiastically, claiming one end of the sofa in the living room, already snatching a fuzzy blanket in readiness for the expected TV dinner.
You quickly stole your suitcase and the takeaway from the car and stowed the luggage away before salvaging the rice and dal from dismissed pots and pans.
"So," you drawled, setting the food down on the table before your girlfriend, "what's it gonna be, love?"
She licked her lips and reached for her plate, patting the spot beside her in encouragement for you to join her.
You slipped onto the couch as she hesitated, thinking, wrapping an arm around her waist as she leant into your side.
"What about an art-house film? Asteroid City is out now? Maya Hawke?" You nodded solemnly, already switching on the TV and searching for the right streaming service.
"Isn't that the one with that actress who looks a lot like you?"
"Ah yes, my evil twin," she chuckled, her mouth full of food. "Scarlett Johansson. That's her name."
"Oh, yeah," you sang, finding the movie and pressing 'play'.
"Are you okay?" you whispered, resting your hand on her abdomen as the credits began, along with a cheery tune, your fingers tracing intricate patterns on her smooth skin.
"Yeah, now that you're here. I think I was just... insecure," she murmured, swishing her fork amongst her next bite.
"Okay," you whispered back as the first scene approached, "you did great, y'know?"
"I'm so glad you're back."
"Me, too. I love you, hon'."
"I love you, too."
A car screeched to a halt on screen, demanding your attention, and you obeyed.
Natasha breathed in deeply, enjoying your warmth and loving feel.
You couldn't imagine anywhere you'd rather be instead of here, with your lover, the most beautiful woman you knew, lying in your arms.
64 notes
·
View notes