#can you guess when i started juggling 3 jobs? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

chelseeebe · 1 year

Text

crush.

a/n: hmm i wonder if you can guess what this is about? i have listened to this song an ungodly amount of times while writing this and i am literally obsessed. i rlly wanted to make this angsty n sad but eddie never gets a happy ending when i write him so decided against it hehe

no use of y/n! smut (18+) eddie is a bit of a douche but very much makes up for it in the end <3

eddie munson was trouble. but you knew that.

he was quite oddly proud of the fact his dad was in jail, facing the chair no less. having been shipped off to his uncle’s in hawkins when he first got sent down.

it was too much for his mom to juggle both him and his brother. especially as eddie was such a handful. she’d call him occasionally and they’d visit every christmas. she mostly called to tell him of his brother’s achievements. disappointed that he wasn’t academic like his big brother.

when he’d eventually graduated high school, third time lucky, he’d picked up a job at the local mechanic shop. learning from the older guys as he went.

your uncle owned the place so you’d be a regular visitor, it meant lots of fussing from his workers, something you basked in. they’d give you sneaky cigarettes and threaten to knock the head off of any guy that dared bother you. and in the summer you’d sit atop the low wall and share cold beers.

when eddie started, he’d seemed like he wasn’t the slightest bit interested in knowing anything about you. you’d assumed that he probably had a girlfriend.

not noticing how his eyes sneakily leered at your legs when you’d been turned away or how he’d try to hide his disappointment when you wouldn’t turn up.

but you watched from afar, noting his habits. when he’d go for a cigarette, long hair tied back with a green scrunchy, an artefact probably stolen from said girlfriend.

and when the summer came around and his sleeves got shorter, showcasing the jumble of tattoos on his defined arms, you were practically foaming at the mouth to get to know him.

you would never ever let him know. not unless he made the first move. and you stood by that.

then one day as summer drew to a close, bare legs swinging as you sat on the wall outside, he’d come up and stood next to you, holding out the box of marlboro reds.

‘y’want one?’ his own cigarette perched between his pink lips, one eyebrow cocked.

you silently take a cigarette, placing it in between your lips and holding your hand out for the lighter. he does one better, taking the lighter from his pocket, flickering the flame and lighting it for you.

it takes every bone in your body to stay upright and not collapse into a pile of mush. your stomach fluttering at the intimacy, his callous hands only inches from your mouth.

you’d thought about his thumbs and how perfect they’d feel running along your lips.

he leans back against the brick, cleaning his oil stained hands on some old rag, taking a long drag, blowing the smoke out of the side of his mouth.

‘you doing anything tonight?’ he asks, squinting as the setting sun glares into his eyes, the orange glow beautifully cascading on his features.

‘hmm.. no,’ trying hard to act as casual as possible, though your heart was practically bursting from your chest.

‘my band’s playing the hideaway tonight, you should come,’ he smirks, grey smoke blowing out of his mouth with every word.

‘your band?’

‘yeah.. i play the guitar, sing a little.. we’re good i promise,’ flicking the cigarette to the pile of other butts at the entrance.

the mention of the guitar is enough to convince you, not that you needed much. filthy thoughts crowding your mind, watching as he pushes himself from the wall, standing in front of you.

‘i might come down, what time are you on?’ you ask, throwing your cigarette into the pile next to his.

‘we’re on at nine,’ he nods, beginning to walk back into the warehouse, ‘i’ll see you tonight.’

his assertiveness makes your cheeks flush, dipping your head and grinning at your lap hoping your uncle hadn’t noticed your conversation.

you do go. obviously.

making sure your skirt is appropriately rolled up, ripped fishnets adorning your legs and enough eyeliner to resemble a raccoon.

it doesn’t go unnoticed by eddie, or anyone really. the grubby old drunks sleazing around you, questionable touches and frankly inappropriate comments. eddie’s eyes stay firmly planted on you throughout, darkening as you stare back at him.

it’s no shock when you find yourself pressed against the rough back wall of the hideout, one of eddie’s hands beside your head, the other creeping underneath your skirt, mouths colliding in a sloppy kiss.

hungry for more as you cling onto his neck, his fingers skirting eerily close to your already wet cunt. you can feel him smirking against your mouth when you buck your hips in response.

‘you coming back to mine?’ he mumbles between kisses, the hand on the wall moving to caress your cheek, rough palms holding the heated skin.

you nod enthusiastically, pressing your body against his, still trapped between him and the wall. he pulls back, eyes glinting with the street lamp. pupils dilated with utter lust, thumb tracing along your swollen lips just like you’d once pictured.

the drive back to his trailer is torture, both of you too frustrated to make conversation. the aching feeling between your legs worsening when his hand reaches over, resting on your thigh. the worst part is that he knows exactly what the fuck he’s doing.

soft squeezes as you press your thighs together, willing for the road to somehow shorten.

you practically jump on him the second you walk through the door, pressing him against whatever solid surface you crash into first. hands desperate to touch him, pulling the holey band shirt up and over his mop of hair.

calloused hands nipping at your thighs as they travelled beneath your skirt. leading you backwards into what you assumed was his room, his tongue making lazy contact with yours when he misjudges the placement of the door, smacking straight into the wall.

he takes this as an opportunity to swap your positions, pushing you backwards into the small room. hands gripping your ass when you stumble into the corner of the bed, tumbling backwards and bringing him down on top of you.

you’re not even properly kissing at this point, breathing heavily as he’s poised above. he pulls back, moving you up the bed with ease, arms slung around his neck.

‘you’re insane,’ he breathes, mattress dipping on either side of your head as he holds himself up, eyes wandering from yours down to your exposed chest, tits peeking out of the tiny top you’d chosen.

‘you gonna do anything? or you just gonna stare?’

he goes from incredibly stoic and admiring to an large grin, no hesitation in lifting the shirt over your head. throwing it somewhere on the cluttered floor as his lips find yours again, spare hand finding the warmth between your legs.

your fingers fiddle with his large belt buckle, rutting your hips upwards, trying to get his hand to something. anything other than just sit there. frustrated with the speed in which he was moving, he grins into your mouth, finding your desperation amusing.

‘christ you’re needy,’ ever-so-slowly hooking his fingers into the waistband of the lacy underwear you’d work just in case, pulling them down with a harsh tug.

‘i’m going home if you don’t hurry up,’ you threaten, though it was empty.

his hand taking place of yours and unhooking his own belt, ‘no you’re not,’ he laughs and you can feel the tent in his jeans rub against your now bare cunt.

the anticipation in your stomach bubbling, eager to have him inside of you. the movement of your own hips doing nothing to help as they move upwards against him, legs wrapped tight around his back.

he pulls his jeans off antagonising and slow, relishing in watching you squirm beneath him, trying to find any relief in the little he was giving you. kicking off the black skinny jeans onto the floor, peering down between your bodies.

his fingers had found their way back between your legs, teasing your sopping hole with his index finger. dipping in but never enough.

a groan rumbles from your throat, ‘please.. just- fuck,’ panting when his middle finger joins the tormenting of your cunt, absolute putty in his hands.

‘ask me nicely,’ he demands, a wide smirk already plastered on his face when you look up at him, pupils blown out and wild.

you can tell he was just as desperate as you were, but taking extra pleasure in getting you begging for him.

‘please.. please fuck me,’ you swallow, eyes closing as you feel his leaking tip circle around your slick entrance.

‘that’s better,’ he quips before pushing himself in, breath hitching in his throat as your legs clamp around him, pulling him in.

‘h-holy shit,’ he murmurs, slowly moving his hips, willing himself not to fucking come already, your whines doing him absolutely no favours.

you slide your hands from his neck to his shoulders, nails digging into the moist skin when his pace quickens. eyes drooping shut when his thumb meets your clit, drawing small circles around the sensitive nub.

the undeniable sounds of your body meeting his full the room, soft cusses flooding out of his mouth when your hips move against him, urging him to move faster.

‘jesus.. you’re so.. uh, fuck you’re so perfect,’ stammering through deep breaths, even the feel of your soft thighs around his waist were fucking him up.

he braved looking down, the vision of your cock drunk face and soft moans, pushing him towards his orgasm. your eyes fluttering when he hits the soft, spongy spot inside, thumb unforgiving around your clit.

‘right there,’ you mewl, hurtling towards your own orgasm, stomach tightening and your legs trembling with every erratic thrust, his own attempt to get you there before him.

‘oh my god,’ you whine as the coil snaps, white-hot pleasure exploding behind your eyes, clawing onto the skin of his shoulders.

his thrusts stutter as your walls clench around him, thick ropes of come painting your insides as he collapses on top of you, mouth open as he rides out his high still inside.

you finally open your eyes, running soothing hands along his back, catching your own breath. cheeks warm and painted a sweet shade of red.

eventually coming back to earth, he rolls over onto the spare side of the bed, wiping the sweat from his forehead. pushing the long black hair back and out of his face.

he stays like that for a few moments, basking in his euphoria. you sit up, and reach down for your discarded shirt, holding it to your bare chest.

he peeks over, ‘you’re going?’ sounding almost disappointed.

you look back over your shoulder at him and shrug, wasn’t that what he wanted? most men would. in fact, they’d dress you themselves if it would get you out of there quicker.

‘you can stay y’know.. was kinda hoping we’d do that again like, at least twice,’ smirking as his fingers toy with the hem of your skirt.

‘okay,’ lips twitching into a smile, falling back onto the bed when his hand tugs on your hip, pulling you into his warm chest.

thus started whatever the hell it was you had going on now. not quite a relationship but enough to be spending half of your time with him. both at the shop and not. many nights spent watching corroded coffin, an unholy amount of black sabbath covers.

you come to learn that eddie regards ozzy osbourne as a hero. someone he tries to style his entire life around. it pisses you off no end when he jumps off the tiny stage at the hideout and onto a crowd of old drunks.

scalding him afterwards for being so stupid because one day they won’t catch him.

‘darling, one day the crowd’ll be so big, you won’t have to worry about it,’ he laughed, throwing his arm over your shoulder.

it’s not long before everyone in the garage figures out exactly what’s going on. your uncle expressing his clear disdain for the new relationship. threatening a passive eddie with a dull screwdriver the second he clocks on.

‘i’m telling you now, that i will kill you if i have to.’

the sight alone makes you collapse into a fit of laughter, eddie’s eyes wide with his hands up in defeat. chuckling himself when your uncle walks away.

one night, you’re sat waiting for eddie to finish fucking about with some motorcycle. your uncle tapping his foot impatiently.

‘i can lock up if you wanna go home,’ you offer, leaning against the uncomfortable metal desk.

‘yeah i do,’ throwing the heavy keys at you, glaring over to eddie, ‘no funny business, and i mean it.’

you smile, placing the keys on the desk next to you and watching as eddie emerges from beneath the bike, hiding his mischievous grin by biting down onto his bottom lip.

‘don’t you fucking dare,’ he warns, pointing at eddie as he walks towards his own car, shaking his head.

‘yessir,’ eddie calls after him, receiving an annoyed honk in response as he hightails out of there.

so when you’re sat atop the old, dusty cadillac just mere minutes later with your legs wrapped around his waist, you giggle into eddie’s mouth.

‘what’s funny?’ he mumbles, hand travelling down your waist, awfully close to the waistband of your jeans.

‘he’s serious, y’know?’ placing your hand on top of his, stopping it from going any further.

‘good,’ his lips sloppily connecting your yours, quickly swapping the position of your hands so his is perched on top, moving both of them down and past your waistband.

‘you’ll get us both killed,’ gasping as he makes your hand brush against your already soaked hole, feeling his grin in the crook of your neck.

‘he’s not gonna find out,’ he utters, softly sucking and nibbling on the sensitive skin.

you go to protest but you’re taken into shock when one of his fingers enters the slick hole, your hand flying out from beneath his to clutch onto the back of his neck.

‘you want me to stop?’ he teases, moving his finger antagonisingly slow, thumb tapping on your clit.

you shake your head no, leaning back and shifting your hips forward along the hood of the dusty car, the metal creaking beneath you.

instinctively throwing your head back when he slides in another finger, the other hand digging into your waist, sure enough to leave a bruise in the morning.

‘holy shit,’ you breathe, feeling his growing erection brush against your thigh, ‘fuck me,’ you beg, immediately going against everything you’d said earlier.

‘huh? what was that?’

your hips writhe against his fingers, ‘fuck me,’ pleading for more than he was currently giving.

he pulls his hand from your jeans, smirking when he goes back in to kiss you, yanking your jeans and panties down around your thighs in one fell swoop.

‘now who’s the one begging for it?’ he groans, struggling with his own jeans, eager to disgrace the poor rusty old car.

the bonnet makes a loud clunking sound from underneath and you seemingly sink into the metal. you and eddie stare at each other, wide-eyed and frankly terrified. neither of you brave enough to look at the inevitable dent your ass had just made.

collapsing into a fit of giggles when eddie lifts your body, mumbling a chorus of shits and fucks, preparing to lose his life to the hands of your pissed off uncle.

‘why the fuck do you have a gun?’ you screech, holding onto the metal door of the locker for stability.

you’d only gone in there in search of his cigarettes, not expecting to find a fucking glock chilling in his tattered old rucksack.

he rushes over, dropping the spanner with a loud clatter, ‘hey hey.. shh, why are you going through my bag?’ his face screwed up as you turn to face him, stern faced.

‘i’ll ask you again, why do you have a fucking gun, eddie?’ wildly throwing your hands about, trying to amplify your point.

his large hand grabs wraps around your wrists, pulling them down out of his face, ‘it’s not mine.. i’m just.. holding it for a friend,’ he peeks around the door, making sure nobody had heard your screaming.

after meeting his friends, you’re sure it’s true. a group of dope slingers who had no regard for their lives, or anyone else’s for that matter.

‘so you thought bringing it to work was a good idea?’ you fume, trying to wriggle your arms free from his grasp.

‘i forgot it was in there, look, it’s not mine, alright? it’s going back tomorrow,’ he looks angry, brows knitted together, jaw tense.

you already worried about him enough. sometimes he’d go m.i.a. for a few hours and you just knew he was somewhere chasing after that group of pricks. he’d sworn to you that he’d never touched that shit, sticking to strictly weed and occasional ketamine.

‘he’ll fucking kill you if you bring that shit here,’ referencing your uncle who was only in the other part of the garage. your hands still trapped in his grip.

‘i forgot,’ he huffs, anger easing as you soften your gaze, realising that your frustration wasn’t so much with him, ‘i’m sorry, alright? it’s not mine- i don’t think it’s even been used.’

you jut out your bottom lip, exhaling sharply from your nose, ‘i don’t care.. just, just don’t bring all that in here.. my uncle’s a good man- i don’t want him involved in your shit.’

‘i know,’ he nods, ‘i know, i’m sorry.. yeah? i promise it’s gone tomorrow,’ eyes searching your face for any sign of forgiveness.

‘okay.. whatever,’ you blink up at him, ‘you can let go of me now.’

‘kiss me and i’ll think about it,’ his frown quickly turning into a smirk.

‘get away from me, you stink,’ faking disgust as you turn your head to the side, trying to conceal your own smile creeping onto your face.

‘shut up,’ he mutters, attacking your exposed neck with a million kisses, eliciting a loud shriek as he pushes you back into the lockers, the metal banging as your back collides with it.

‘not in the fucking garage,’ your uncle rounds the corner, pissed that he’d been subjecting to such a sight.

eddie lets go immediately, wiping his sweaty forehead, unknowingly smearing black shit all over the skin. you lean back against the locker, apologising to your uncle with your eyes.

he aggressively tosses his rag at eddie, ‘clean yourself up, you look like a fuckin’ idiot,’ before getting back to tinkering with some car.

eddie had somewhat always regarded himself as a hero. needing to constantly save people, throw his weight around when necessary. or completely unnecessarily, as you’d see it.

you usually rolled your eyes and pulled him away. but tonight it hadn’t worked.

and he’d got his ass absolutely handed to him by a group of men in some new bar you were trying. one of them had come up to you, a little drunk and far too handsy. nothing you couldn’t handle on your own.

but eddie had had to get involved, shoving the drunk backwards into the bar, crashing into the rest of his pals gathered around.

so one of them threw a punch, connecting with his jaw, sending him reeling backwards. he’d tried to hold his own, pushing you away in the middle of the chaos.

you’d had to step in the middle when the men had circled around him on the floor, all leather jackets and raging testosterone levels. rather pathetic.

you stayed silent for the entire walk back to his trailer. eddie trailing along, clutching his already bruised cheek.

‘i’m sorry,’ he calls from a few paces behind, groaning as he walked. you ignored it, pressing on until you reached the trailer park.

you stand behind as he unlocks the door, sulking because of his impulsive actions. well deserved, you thought.

as soon as you’re inside, he turns to face you, ‘can you just speak to me?’ pouting, putting on his sickening puppy dog eyes.

you just want to rip his head from his shoulders, it wasn’t like he used his brain much anyway. you shove his chest, ‘sit down.’

he complies, perching on the sofa and still feeling sorry for himself as you grabbed the antiseptic and the cotton pads from the bathroom. walking back into the room with a worthy scowl on your lips.

you sit next to him, slightly too harsh as you turn his face towards you. dousing the cotton wool in the smelly liquid, pressing it to his cheek.

sucking the air in between his teeth and gripping onto the soft sofa, ‘jesus fuck,’ he curses, but stays sat still, too scared of what you’d do if he dared move.

‘serves you right,’ you hiss, dabbing the cotton on the wound, ‘i owe you a fucking black eye for that shit.. i’ve told you, i don’t need you to start throwing fists for me.’

he places his hand on your arm, eyes sad as they gaze up at you, ‘i know.. but he was fuckin-,’ stopping whatever he was about to say when your eyes meet his, glaring at him.

‘yeah, he was a creep.. but i can handle it, eddie,’ running your finger over his split lip, garnering a wince from eddie.

‘yeah,’ admitting defeat with a soft squeeze of your arm, ‘i’m sorry,’ eyes glimmering with hope when your face softens, not able to stay mad at him for very long.

‘mhm,’ tossing the now-red cotton ball onto the small coffee table, ‘does it hurt?’ locking eyes with him once more.

‘only a little.’

you pause briefly, ‘thank you.. for protecting my honour or whatever, but i can handle that shit without you.’

he doesn’t reply verbally, but his eyes glint, lips curling into a small smile. he doesn’t need to say it. you know exactly what that look means. unspoken but you can feel it so deeply.

it’s exactly why you felt so sick watching him essentially get jumped. why your heart stang when he hadn’t got back up.

‘i know you can,’ breaking the silence, fingers still curled around your arm.

you exhale, giving in completely, ‘well, at least you look super tough now.,’

‘y’think so?’

‘mhm, sexy too,’ once again tracing over the small cut on his lip, pulling his lip down with your thumb.

his eyes glisten with infatuation, the simple action already driving him crazy. gazing at you through long eyelashes and praying to god you’d always be here to clean his wounds.

you hadn’t realised you’d dozed off to sleep until the creaking of the trailer door jolts you awake. you’d got tired of waiting for eddie, who had promised to be back before eleven. telling you it’d be fine to just go straight to his, wayne wouldn’t mind.

the dusty alarm clock flashed 3:30, hours after he’d told you he’d be there.

the floorboards creak and there’s hushed whispers from the living room that you can just about vaguely make out as something along the lines of, ‘shit, sorry.’

‘what the hell are you doin’? she’s been in there waiting for you all fuckin’ night.’

‘i know.. sorry for waking you uncle wayne, night.’

you close your eyes again before eddie’s bedroom door opens and he creeps into the room. you brace, waiting to see if he’ll acknowledge your presence.

‘you awake?’ he calls out quietly, shimmying out of his denim jacket.

‘yep.’

‘i’m sorry i’m late.. i got caught up,’ you can hear him rustling about, stepping around the shit on his floor to get to the bed.

he sits on the few inches of mattress between you and the edge, reaching his arm out to find your body resting his hand on your exposed arm.

‘where the fuck have you been?’ you glower at him, his shitty plastic blinds letting in just enough of the bright moon to illuminate his face.

‘i was with rick.. i didn’t realise what time it was,’ kicking his shoes off onto the old carpet.

‘don’t lie to me eddie.’

he sighs and you can see his eyes drop, knowing he’d already been caught out, anything he tried to say now was futile.

‘alright,’ thumb stroking your goosebump filled arm, trying to keep you docile enough to tell you the full story, ‘promise you won’t get mad?’

you brace, waiting for the horrible truth of how he’d been with some girl, that this was pointless and you should get the fuck out of his bed. you nod, perhaps not really meaning it.

‘right..’ he bites down on his bottom lip, shuffling to face you, ‘rick uh, got into some shit, needed some cash to get out of it.. you really can’t get mad, alright?’

‘i won’t, just tell me,’ reaching out to latch your finger into the silver chain hanging from his belt loop, now knowing that at least this had fuck all to do with you.

he swallows, finding your eyes in the darkness, ‘we robbed that corner store down on seventh.. it was a one time thing, yeah? these people he was fucking with are bad news, we had to,’ he scrabbles to justify himself to you.

‘what?’

‘i said you can’t get mad.’

‘i’m not mad.. is that what that fucking gun was for?’

‘no- well, i dunno.. he had it on him but he didn’t use it, promise,’ hand sliding up your arm to caress your cheek.

‘how much did he need? jesus christ eds, i wish you’d just told me,’ you pout, picturing him in some crazy western-style shootout in the tiny corner store.

‘i know, i’m sorry.. i didn’t want you getting involved, it’s done now, no more,’ thumb pressed against your temple drawing small lines on your skin.

‘okay,’ you nod, not quite believing him but having to suffice with what he was giving. you didn’t like to think about the shit he got up to with rick, better left in the dark for the sake of your sanity.

‘y’gonna let me in? s’fucking freezing out here.’

you oblige, shuffling across the bed and lifting the blanket for him to crawl under. he quickly gets out of his jeans, throwing his t-shirt somewhere on the ground before getting under the blanket.

his cold arms wrapping around your waist, pulling you into his chest. you shiver under his touch, sighing when your head touches his skin.

‘m’sorry,’ he mumbles into the top of your hair, ‘i’m all yours tomorrow.’

you mutter a small, ‘good,’ nestling into his hold, slowly dropping off to sleep, comforted by his warm arms.

eddie was absolutely furious. you hadn’t even meant to say it, at least not in the way it had came out.

he was being a dick again, showing off at the bar after you’d already told him you wanted to go home. but he wasn’t listening. and ended up with the swollen cheek to show for it.

‘how many times do i have to tell you that you can’t just fucking fight people because they were rude to you once?’ you huff, gripping onto the steering wheel.

‘i’m sorry, okay? you could’ve gone home.. i would’ve been fine on my own,’ he counters, rubbing his sore cheek, slumped down in the passenger seat.

you scoff, ‘yeah, looked like it,’ rolling your eyes as you’d had to pull him off of the floor once more.

‘jesus christ, it’s not that deep, i’m alive.. you’re alive, just leave it,’ fed up, with his ego slightly bruised, he didn’t mean to snap but tonight had pissed him off too.

‘you’re gonna end up dead.. or just like your dad, is that what you want?’ you’d immediately regretted it, the words sounded foreign leaving your mouth.

‘is that what you think i am? see, you think you know me, know my dad.. but you haven’t got the slightest idea what it’s like,’ he spits back, face screwed up in frustration.

‘i didn’t- i didn’t mean it like that,’ you plead, sneaking brief looks at his aggravated face.

‘d’ya know what? let me out here, i’ll walk.’

‘eddie.. i’m sorry please ju-,’

‘let me out of this fucking car,’ he hisses, already pushed past his limit.

you oblige, pulling over on the dark road. you weren’t far from the trailer park but it’d be at least a twenty minute walk and it was pitch black.

‘it’s dark, will you be okay?’ but you’re cut off with a slam of the door, he’s already stormed off into the woods before you can even think about locking the doors and trapping him inside.

you’d honestly thought he wasn’t being serious. an empty threat. biting down onto your bottom lip, internally debating whether to go out into the woods and drag him back.

the thing is, eddie knew the woods, had used them as a shortcut to get home for years, whereas you’d merely driven past on the way to his. there was no use in going out there with no flashlight and ending up lost.

so you turn the car around, driving towards your own house for once. you’d see him at the garage tomorrow. he’d have calmed down and you can weasel your way back into his good books.

except, he doesn’t turn up for work the next day.

your stomach flips when your uncle comes banging around the corner expecting eddie to be trailing behind.

‘where is he?’

‘what? he’s not here? i don’t- i don’t know, we uh,’ you stop yourself, ‘i stayed at home last night.. i thought he’d be here,’ mind racing, already thinking of what terrible things could’ve happened in those creepy woods.

‘he hasn’t turned up, y’wanna tell him that if he’s sick i need a phone call, something.. he doesn’t get off just because you two are messin’ about,’ he points his blackened finger at you, walking back into the garage shaking his head.

you don’t even make it fully into the warehouse, turning on your heel back to your old car and speeding out of there. you’d check the trailer first and then make the treacherous journey through the woods.

when you drive up the gravel, you can see his van isn’t parked outside in it’s usual spot. okay, maybe he went out. or was just late to work. at least you know he’d made it back and wasn’t still in the woods somewhere.

you still knock on the grimy door, knowing that wayne would probably just be waking up.

the door swings open and he looks positively fuming until he sees it’s you, ‘oh, y’alright doll? early isn’t it?’

‘hey wayne, is eddie home? he didn’t turn up for work so i’m just.. wondering if he’s okay..’ you swallow loudly, knowing damn well he wasn’t in there.

‘no.. no he went out last night, seemed pretty pissed off so i didn’t bother to ask- you okay? y’look like you’ve seen a ghost,’ he looks genuinely concerned, holding onto the plastic rim of the door.

‘we had an argument and he stormed off,’ tears welling in your eyes.

‘yeah i figured, i’m sure he’s alright.. sometimes he just needs to calm down for a while, don’t let it worry you,’ he adds, the sentiment was nice but your heart was thudding.

you weren’t even officially together for fuck sake. but you at least knew how you felt about him and had a small inclination that he felt similarly. maybe you’d fucked it for good. he had no real loyalties to you, what was stopping him from running off and never speaking to you again.

‘okay,’ you nod, blinking rapidly so to hide your tears, ‘can you please tell him to call me if, or when he gets back?’

‘sure thing sweets, i’ll see you later,’ he waves before closing the door.

you traipse off back to your car, thinking of a list of places he could possibly be. a handful of them being immediately crossed off as it was the middle of the morning.

it’s almost evening before you think to check rick’s house. having driven around all day looking at his usual spots for him, asking everyone if he’d been there or if they knew where he could be.

it was only at the hideout where one of the girls behind the bar suggests rick’s with a chuckle.

eddie had stopped by rick’s before, you’d stayed in the van though and he’d disappear inside before emerging with a ton of weed and a shit eating grin on his face.

you can spot his van the second you round the corner. feeling the relief wash over you the second you know he’s actually still alive and in hawkins. then the feeling of guilt is replaced by rage. annoyed that you’d driven the entirety of this shithole town and he’d just been here getting high the entire time.

there’s a small second in which you debate if going up and banging on the door was actually a good idea or if it’d just cause more problems.

you do it anyway, parking next to his van and walking up the wooden steps to the massive house. a muffled thumping of music gets louder as you approach. they probably wouldn’t even hear you.

but you knock, waiting patiently for someone, hopefully eddie, to answer.

the door opens, revealing a skinny, tousled man who you’d never seen before, he stares at you, mouth open for what feels like minutes.

‘is eddie in there?’ you ask, staring back at the strange man.

‘yeah, two seconds,’ he mumbles before closing the door, hopefully going to get the man. you couldn’t be sure he even knew what you said.

the door opens again a few moments later, looking rather disheveled, eyes wild and still in the same clothes he’d skulked off in last night. he stinks of a mixture between booze and weed, hair hanging limp around his face.

‘woah hey, what are you doing here?’ sounding genuinely confused, not the reaction you’d imagined.

‘well, you didn’t show up for work.. i wanted to know if you were alright,’ you shrug, suddenly feeling stupid for even stalking him this badly.

‘shit, yeah.. i was s’posed to call, i forgot,’ he steps out onto the porch, closing the door round behind him, ‘you came all the way out here to find me?’

‘yeah,’ you say quietly, just realising how much of a crazy bitch you must seem.

‘eddie!’ a female voice calls from inside the house. you look between him and the door as she peers round the door, a pretty girl, someone else you’d never seen before.

your heart sinks.

‘oh shit.. sorry,’ she grimaces, ‘i just wanted to know if you were coming back in?’

‘just give me two minutes, alright?’ he glares at her as she holds her hand up in apology before going back into the house.

that blind rage you’d felt pulling up the house reappears and you’d love to reach across and slap his now-very purple cheek.

‘that’s not- that wasn’t what you think it was,’ he pleads, noticing your clenched jaw and balled up fist.

‘yeah i’m sure it wasn’t,’ you add sarcastically, ‘i can see that you’re perfectly fine so i’m gonna go ahead and leave, you have fun,’ heart beating out of your chest as you turn around and walk down the wooden steps.

he’s already hot on your tail, ‘can you just- baby listen to me,’ calling out from a few paces behind.

‘get fucked,’ you spit, trying to get into your car before he could reach you.

he’s grabbing at your arm the second the cars unlocked, ‘listen to me,’ you’re spun around to face him before you can even register what’s going on.

‘what? what are you gonna say? you don’t owe me anything, eddie.. you can do whatever you want,’ your throat burning from the untruthful words.

‘i haven’t-,’ he sighs, collecting himself before continuing, ‘i wanted to piss you off a little, so i came here and then me and rick got into some shit and i lost track of time, i’m sorry,’ fingers beginning to dig into your arm, afraid that if he loosened his grip you’d run away.

‘so who’s your little girlfriend?’ sounding far more jealous than you’d perhaps liked.

‘that’s fucking rick’s girlfriend, i don’t even know her name,’ he pleads, his bottom lip jutted out in his best puppy dog impression.

you swallow, hardly believing him, ‘right, even if that was true, it wouldn’t matter.. you’re single, i’m single, you can do whatever you want,’ shaking your arm as a last ditch attempt to get him off of you and get away.

his face falls, he’d fucked up before, sure. but not to the extent where you wouldn’t be kissing all over him moments after he apologised. or where you’d outwardly expressed your lack of an official title.

it wasn’t like he wasn’t aware that you weren’t exactly official. he just always assumed that there was an understanding that you two were together, but not really.

‘you’re not serious? i fucked up, i know. but i haven’t fucked her- or, or anyone else for that matter.’

his fingers loosen and you take that as your opportunity to yank your arm away, opening the car door and getting halfway in when his hand slams onto the metal, stopping you from closing the it.

‘get off of my car,’ you glare, your hand gripping the handle as you argue with him.

‘i’m trying to talk to you, you won’t even give me that?’ he begs, knuckles white as he’s losing the battle against the door.

‘i have nothing to say to you,’ you spit, using your other hand to gain leverage, he relents and you slam the door shut. shoving the key into the ignition before speeding off out of the long driveway.

eddie stands there gormless for a minute. staring as your car disappears into the distance. he kicks his boot into a pile of leaves, cursing as the front door opens and rick peers round having heard the entire argument from his front room.

he argues against getting into his van and chasing after you but he’s still well over the limit and you’d only be more pissed off if you knew.

you must’ve passed out at some point, exhausted from the rage and pain of it all. not even bothering to crawl under your blanket, just in a heap on one side of your bed.

the window slides open, forcing you out of your slumber. a string of curses come from the other side of your room and then a small thud as whichever crazy psychopath makes their way into your room.

you bolt upright, eyes adjusting to the dark room. just about making out the silhouette of the man. the undeniable curly hair making it rather easy to decipher who it is.

‘shit,’ he mumbles, feeling his way through the room towards your bed, tripping on something on the floor, he hadn’t noticed you sit up.

you switch the lamp on, squinting as the light fills the room. looking like a deer in headlights as he pauses, frozen as you glare over at him.

‘what the fuck are you doing?’ you hush, knowing your dad was definitely fast asleep just down the hall.

‘i didn’t wanna wake your dad up,’ he looks down at the floor to see what was caught around his foot and then back at you, ‘i need to-,’ he looks down again, realising exactly what he’d tripped over, ‘is that my fucking shirt?’ he picks the torn up piece of fabric off of his boot.

you’d hacked at the metallica shirt with a pair of rusty scissors, now in multiple pieces strewn across your floor. the scissors dumped somewhere next to your bed.

‘you cut up my shirt?’ he asks, bewildered, the black cotton just dangling from his fingers as he walks over to the bed.

‘no,’ a blatant lie, ‘the dog ate it,’ shrugging innocently.

he’s in disbelief but his lips twitch, turning into a smirk, dropping what was left of his shirt back onto the floor, ‘you’re fucking crazy, you know that?’ now towering over you beside the bed.

‘you’re a fucking asshole, you know that?’ you refute, still so infuriated with him.

‘yeah, i do,’ he sits on the empty half of your bed, ‘that’s why i’m here,’ eyes full of hope, the exact opposite to how you’d left him just hours prior.

‘you’re here to tell me that you’re an asshole? could’ve saved yourself a trip, i’m already well aware of that.’

‘are you gonna shut up and listen to me?’

you scowl at him but keep your mouth shut, nodding to get him to carry on.

‘i’m here because i- hm,’ he tenses, moving up the bed, his hands cupping both of your cheeks, needing your full attention, ‘because i fucking love you, yeah?’

his brown eyes search your face for a response when you don’t answer, hands slowly releasing their grip on your skin. maybe it was too little too late, had he fucked any chance at making things right?

you take a minute to read his face, trying to determine if he was just trying to weasel his way back into the comfortable position he was in with you.

when his face rightly falls due to your lack of an answer, you finally croak out a small, ‘you do?’

his hands squeeze the fat on your cheeks, relieved to hear something come out of your mouth, ‘of course i do,’ he looks slightly offended that you’d even question the legitimacy of what he’d said.

so you lunge forward, crashing your lips to his, grinning against his cheek as your lips connect in a chaotic kiss. his body falling backwards onto the mattress as your torso collides with his, holding himself up with one hand.

‘holy fuck,’ he mutters into your mouth, clinging onto your jaw for some stability.

you pull away, eyes glimmering as you gaze up at him, ‘i love you too,’ twisting your face into a satisfied smile.

uncaring if your dad could hear, forcing him backwards onto your mattress, clambering atop, your lips hazily connecting with his again.

#eddie munson x you #eddie munson stranger things #eddie munson #eddie munson x fem!reader smut #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson smut #eddie x reader #eddie x you #eddie munson angst

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frick-yes-dragons · 11 months

Text

15 questions, 15 mutuals

tagged by @hxilstorm my love :)))

1. are you named after anyone? No, fun fact my parents still hadn't chosen a name for me when we left the hospital! They chose my name pretty randomly from a baby book I think. My middle name's from some great aunt on my mum's side but I never knew her

2. when was the last time you cried? umm two weeks ago when i realised I was gonna have to submit my final essay a day late

3. do you have kids? um NO at this age??? Maybe down the track but yk, depends on the partner/circumstances/general state of the world I guess

4. do you use sarcasm a lot? yeah I probably do, I don't really notice though

5. what sports do you play/have you played? I've been playing soccer nearly 10 years now and it's one of my favourite things, I also did gymnastics, AFL and swimming when I was a kid.

6. what’s the first thing you notice about people? their voice and the way they talk

7. what’s your eye colour? blue baby

8. scary movies or happy endings? I don't dislike scary movies it's just that I don't really get it? so I guess I'll say happy endings

9. any special talents? define special- I can juggle, I'm ok at devils sticks. OH and I'm pretty good at using and fixing printers!!

10. where were you born? a while outside Melbourne, abt half an hour from where I live now

11. what are your hobbies? I play the piano! I also like to embroider, make friendship bracelets, and I'm learning to sew

12. do you have pets? yes yes yes! I have 2 dogs, a cat and 2 horses. I'm so excited atm bc this holidays we're hopefully going to start building a chicken shed and I can finally have chickens again after 5 years!!

13. how tall are you? around 5'7? I don't actually know exactly

14. favourite subject in school? tbh i didn't really have one- literature, maths and french are probably tied but they it depends on the teacher

15. dream job? dream job is no job, I would very much like to just sit around and make things all day. Is that an option? I wanted to be an artist when i was a kid. More realistically though, I'd like to teach or do some kind of support work in schools

u don't have to if u don't want to but I'm passing it on to @glitchydyke @startingfires, @megadan94, @thelonelyrainbowdude, @thedumpsterwizard @learnyourlessonswell, @bedrock-sedodn @violet-prism-creatively @omg-a-shark @boobie-fucker, @sentimental-lil-thing, @skyward-nerd, @emilreloaded, @punkocelot @my-dude-james, @dinsicle

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flowersandbigteeth · 1 year

Note

how does your partner feel about your erotica? Do they read it? :3

He is very proud of me. I'm always self deprecating like "it's just silly little stories" and my hubby is always building me up, like "no don't sell yourself short, keep writing!"

I said something the other day like "I guess [my client] probably can't find anyone else, that's why they chose me" He got offended and said "OR you're just very talented!"

He is very, very supportive! He doesn't read a lot, generally, so he doesn't read every little thing I write, but he's read a few. 😂😍

He always listens to me bounce my plotlines off of him and my theories about noncon/dubcon. We talk about that a lot, because I go back and forth about if and how I want to write it. It's very much vibes based. But he gives me his opinions.

I've done a lot of jobs I've hated since we graduated high school (we dated in middle school if you can even call it that and then started up again when we got older) so he's known me almost my whole life and seen me go through a lot of hard times where I worked A LOT, and basically had no time to myself.

So he just says he is happy to see me finally having the time to pursue something that I like 🥹 I honestly think I could take up juggling or something and he would still cheer me on, he's just a really sweet person like that. 💖

#admin speaks #admin note #sweet asks #sweet anons

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anonymouspuzzler · 1 year

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Yay Yipee I Finally Remembered I Should Update Folks On Things That Are Happening

because hey whoops as some of you might remember Supposedly I Stream Sometimes! That Uhhhh Hasn't Happened In A While Has It! so I should probably let folks know what's goin' on!! the long and the short of it is

Around late November/early December I started having issues where Discord would crash and restart anytime I tried to screenshare my capture software with my friends who I stream with. This put console game streams (so 2/3 of the games we were streaming) on the backburner till I could troubleshoot and solve that issue

On top of that it was Fucking Finals Season for me at my Graduate School so at a certain point I had to be responsible and focus on getting my final projects & essays done, which meant sacrificing stream time till my break (where I would hopefully have time to troubleshoot and then do a ton of streaming to make up for lost time)

Except THEN literally the second I went home for the holidays my hard drive abruptly and completely died. It is very possible that this contributed to the aforementioned tech issues

I was able to replace the drive and get my computer working again but because I have a Fucking Curse a lot of tech-side things were lost or started experiencing issues due to the new drive, namely A) I haven't been able to get my capture software working yet and B) whoops my entire OBS layout is just gone now I guess

This whole saga, on top of juggling other life shit and work and the like, effectively ate up my entire winter break

so tl;dr! I have a computer curse and because of it streams are gonna have to wait till I can get both OBS and my capture software working again. I'm hoping to work on that this weekend so I can be back to streaming next week, but given my school & job workload I'm guessing it'll more likely be two or three weeks. On top of that, I won't be streaming most of March due to reason of "my partner is visiting then". all of this sucks cause I want to be streaming, both for reason of "i like spending time with my good friends doing this" and "haha whoops I'm not earning money now and oh boy there sure are a lot of expenses flying at my head like rocks huh".

I've already rambled a bit more than I'd like to now so here's da main points:

Streams will (HOPEFULLY) be back in February. When they are, they'll be Monday & Tuesday nights, 5:30pst/8:30est, for as long as my friends remain available at those times (we're all adults having to look for or maintain Day Jobs so availability could change. y'all know how it is). I may also do occasional one-off streams on weekends as my energy 'n schedule permits, most likely art streams

I'll continue to be around on Holly's streams Fri/Sat/Sun as her schedule permits, because I don't have to rebuild OBS from the ground up for that

There is a 99.99% chance I'll be totally absent stream-wise during March

Even though streams are facing The Troubles I am still taking art commissions! Those haven't been affected!! You can submit an interest form here and I'll reach out to confirm prices as soon as I'm ready to start work on yours

If, out of the kindness of your heart, you would like to toss some support my way during The Troubles (which would be much appreciated; as said I've got a lot of expenses coming my way and unfortunately my day job covers my rent and nothing more), here are some other ways you can do so: -- Tip me on Ko-Fi; if you pay $9 or more you can request a doodle that I'll do for you and post on here & twitter (and might stream the process of drawing once that's up and running again). Here's an example of some Ko-Fi doodles I did previously -- You can also tip through my stream page if you want but I probably won't see those till I start streaming again. Still appreciated!!! -- I have a Throne Wishlist that's mostly stuff like kitchenware, household goods, stuff for my kitty, etc. There's also a few Fun Things though, like vinyls and a billy big bass Jay insisted I add. Either way, if you wanna contribute to something on there it means a lot. You can also suggest items to make me laugh

an' above all: thank you for reading and for bein' around!!

#long post /#anonymous puzzler talks #sorry for the big ramble!! i just figured it was worth putting everything out there #you mighta heard bits and pieces of this on friends' streams slash twitter slash wherever #but i figured it was worth puttin' in one place #anyway if you read this far: i hope you're having a good day and if you're not i hope a good day comes your way!!!!!#edit: i forgot the link to the doodles!! silly me!!! that is in there now

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claraxbarton · 3 months

Note

You might have answered this before, BUT I’m a recent follower and curious ok!! Generally speaking, what is your writing process like? I’m genuinely so impressed by how many different fics you’ll have going simultaneously and they’re all updated SO frequently. AND THEY’RE ALL SO GOOD?? Like do you have vague plans/outlines or drafts that you expand on/edit? Your accountability post will mention writing a few thousand words and then there’s an update the same day and it’s written so well lmao it blows my MIND bc it seems like you just come up with the plot on the fly and then casually write a lil masterpiece after work like it’s nbd. All of this to say I appreciate your work so much ♥️

So uh, to start off with, I'm guessing when you say you recently started following me, you're probably just reading my HRPF fics? I SAY that/ask that because I've bounced through a few fandoms and I kind of go back and forth between being VERY prolific and finishing up projects and kind of... losing steam.

To be fair to me and not to scare anyone off, before this year I have, for the last decade and change, been juggling two full time jobs, part time work, childcare and a lot of volunteer work PLUS trying to write so like, I'm cutting myself some slack on abandoned projects. Because I'm finally down to 1 full time job and 1 part time gig that is only during the summer. I will ALSO say, in December I switched meds for my anxiety/depression so I'm on a new dose, new meds for the first time in 5 years and I do think that's been really impactful in a positive way.

SO, exposition and TMI out of the way:

I wish I could say I had a really clear process that I follow every time, but I don't want to lie. I create docs with notes - I'm thinking about including those as an epilogue chapter on the fics I'm currently working on, if anyone is interested in my scribbles aside from myself and my beta - and SOMETIMES I create outlines. A lot of the time, I will write a chapter or two and THEN create the outline? That's what happened with Gold Rush, but also with Gold Rush, I have already deviated from the outline like... a lot.

I'm trying to be way more chill with myself than I used to be. I was in this deep grind of forcing myself to be productive because that's where my value was (@kangofu-cb is a real one and has been trying to beat this out of me for years. Beating with love). And I'll be honest, being kinder to myself and putting less pressure is, like, so far, so good.

I usually have about, like... a dozen or so fic ideas in my head at any one time (@dwisp can attest to the DAILY messages of 'hear me out' as can @kangofu-cb), but I uh, I really feel 4 long fic is my simultaneous max.

I also have a problem with like, so if you DO want to read some of my not HRPF stuff, I think a good primer is the WinterhawkHood month I did in October with a fic a day, and the consistent issue is: I feel like I'm really good at creating a premise and that premise wants to exist beyond 2-5k. So longfic is probably the format to best tell the stories I want to tell, but, like, writing shorter fic is a lot of fun? That also does NOT answer your question.

Oh! MUSIC! It's so so so so important to my process. I used to put on specific artists, like really get into a singular vibe for a fic. But these days it's just my routine sleepy sad girl playlists (name coined by a former assistant and like she wasn't wrong). Which also probably explains how much sad sack Leon there is in my current fics. I should probably like, get some new playlists going...

Uh, in terms of like, my style/my ideas... so my professional life is theatre adjacent, and I think because of that, dialogue and THE INCITING INCIDENT are really important to me. So usually any fic idea forms around the kernal of the meet ugly and some choice words.

Like, for Gold Rush, I absolutely started from the idea of Leon being a bitch to the press and getting a text from an unknown number/Matthew and it just grew from there.

For Playing Favorites, I absolutely wanted to have former camboy Vince realize his new... work colleague??? Adam Larsson knew he was a former camboy. Which is funny because that moment happens in the middle of the fic (which I AM going to update again soon, y'all might vote consistently for Gold Rush in the polls but this weekend I think it's gotta be some love for my two Lars&Dunn fics).

For Northern Attitude, that inciting incident is, uh, about to occur in ch4 that I'm currently working on. And it's. Well. Yeah. So I got the idea for that 'scene' if you will first and then figured it out backwards?

For Wildfire that, too, has an inciting incident that has yet to make it into a chapter. But she's coming soon.

So really, only Gold Rush started as the beginning as far as ideas went for me? That said, I still START at the beginning when I write. I used to scribble down scenes and then piece them in, but I honestly found it constrained me more than anything else and I'm aware that doesn't make much sense.

I feel like this entire answer is a total nonanswer of me just blathering away. I hope at least part of this is what you wanted and uh... sincerely? Thank you for asking. It means a lot and like, my process is weird and inconsistent but I do genuinely love to talk about my writing.

#wow #talk about yourself more #no but thanks for the ask #this was a lot about me #sorry to anyone who def did not want to read this

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hopelesshawks · 2 years

Text

Companionship XP Part 39- Moving Forward

18+ Kaminari Denki x fem!reader quirkless, streamer au

Summary: The decision to start a youtube channel was a spur of the moment thing. Sure you’d watched your friends have great success with their own channels, but when you uploaded your first video playing Genshin you never would have guessed it would take off the way it did. You’re perfectly content with the community you’ve built but if there’s one thing you’ve been missing, it’s someone to co-op with. When Mina offers to link you up with one of her old friends with his own channel, you just hope he won’t be too obnoxious. Enter Kaminari Denki. He’s definitely obnoxious, but he’s also so much more.

Masterlist Help Lulu <3

As you switch the stream from the screen you usually have up while people join to your camera, you don’t expect much of a reaction considering how long it’s been since the photo of you was first posted. Instead you turn it on and chat goes nuts. You hadn’t realized just how much of your audience had gone out of their way to avoid your face reveal (or at least are doing a good job of pretending they did) and it makes your heart warm. You give yourself a moment to just appreciate it. The not so little anymore community you’ve made for yourself rallying together to support your actual face reveal.

“Ok, ok guys, I get it, I’m stunning but you can all settle down now,” you joke, a wide smile you can’t shake stretching your lips.

Chat immediately starts to co-sign the statement, making you laugh brightly as you watch the frankly excessive amount of compliments roll in.

“You’re all simps, derogatory, but I do want to talk to you guys before we get started with the stream. That ok?”

Your eyes swing over to chat again as people eagerly respond. God you’ve missed this.

“Ok so I know you all have heard by now that someone was able to figure out who I was while I was out meeting someone and took a photo of me without permission to out me on twitter. I don’t think they meant any harm by it, even if it did do harm, so I really don’t want people attacking them or anything. It was hard… for a bit. I can admit that. I’m sure some of you heard or saw what happened on Chargebolt’s stream.”

You wince slightly at the memory. Although you are at least grateful that it gave you the last push you needed to get back on stream.

“But what matters now is that I’m ok, I’m back, and I’m excited for whatever the future looks like with you all. I really have missed you guys. I’ll probably still mostly go camera off. It would almost feel weird having my face on screen all the time. Also… frankly guys I’m lazy. This?”

You gesture to yourself, the outfit you’d chosen specifically for this stream, and the general indications of the effort you’d actually put in to look presentable on camera.

“This shit took time and I love you guys but not that much.”

Your teasing draws an equal amount of protests and validation from chat but it’s all done with such fondness and love. Your cheeks are already starting to hurt from how much you’re smiling but it’s well worth the pain.

“That said it would be fun to do some more collaborations and that’s a lot easier now that I won’t be juggling whether to have camera on or not, if it’s on how to set it up so I’m not visible, stuff like that. So like I said, I’m excited for the future. I really hope you guys are too…”

You allow the moment to hang in the air, to allow yourself to enjoy it and enjoy the outpouring of love and excitement coming from the people watching you. You soak in each treasured second of it and when you’re done basking in the moment, you start to boot up Genshin.

“Ok dorks, that’s enough sappy shit. Let’s get into it. I still haven’t done my daily commissions and I fully plan on kicking Childe’s ass at some point today.”

You spend the next few hours playing, occasionally taking breaks to just talk with chat. In some ways it feels like catching up with a good friend you haven’t seen in ages. Everyone wants to hear about you and Denki and they go back and forth between teasing you about it and fawning over you both with each story you tell. You leave some things for yourself, after all there is still a level of privacy you’d like to maintain. Your date at the gardens will always be just for you and Denki. But still it’s nice getting to share in your joy with the community, many of whom were rooting pretty hard for the two of you to end up together anyway. By the time you close out the stream you feel lighter than you have in a long time and as you wish everyone a goodnight, you find yourself excited for the next time you’ll get to interact with them again.

Once everything is shut down, your first stop is to go to your apartment door. You unlock and open it swiftly and are not at all surprised when a blur of blonde hair and flailing limbs comes tumbling into your apartment as a result. Denki blinks up at you sheepishly as you lean over him so you can make eye contact.

“I told you I’d be fine,” you chuckle, shaking your head.

“I know! I just, uh, happened to be in the neighborhood! So I thought ‘I know! I’ll stop by and check in on my incredibly awesome and understanding girlfriend!’ because I’m just thoughtful like that, y’know? But totally not at all premeditated, no ma’am,” Denki fumbles, trying to explain away his actions in spite of all signs pointing to quite the opposite of his claims.

You raise one eyebrow skeptically before very pointedly shifting your gaze to his phone where he’s still on the screen for your stream and back to his eyes.

“Has anyone ever told you you’re a shit liar Denki?”

“Yeaaa, I get that a lot.”

You can’t help but giggle at that, reaching a hand down to help him to his feet before pressing a quick kiss to his cheek.

“You’re lucky you’re cute, you know that?” you ask with a teasing lilt in your voice.

“I know,” he beams, giving you that 5000 megawatt smile you adore so much.

“Stick around to watch a movie since you ‘happened to be in the neighborhood?’”

“Sure! Sounds perfect.”

Later that night when you fall asleep in his arms in the middle of the film, he doesn’t complain or wake you up. He just smiles down at you fondly, pressing a kiss to your head before whispering ‘I love you’ into the stillness of the night, barely audible over the sound of the movie still playing in front of you both. It doesn’t matter that you can’t hear him in your sleep. He’ll have plenty of time to tell you it again and again when you wake up.

A/N: Holyyyy shit, I can't believe I finally finished this series. Thank you so, so much for your patience. In spite of all the delays, I really hope you guys enjoyed this. Denki doesn't get nearly enough love so I was very happy to give him a fic of his own, especially since he was the best friend in so many of my previous ones. To everyone who made it this far, thank you, thank you, thank you.

Taglist: @hutaoscoffinn @hhawkz @touyasdoll @pillboxmb @hoobish @fandomsgotmefucked @buckybearbabe98 @lovemegood @articmace

#hopelesscx #denki x fem!reader #denki x reader #denki x y/n #kaminari x fem!reader #kaminari x reader #kaminari x y/n #denki kaminari x fem!reader #denki kaminari x y/n #denki kaminari x reader

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theficblog · 2 years

Text

THIRD WHEEL

PARK JISUNG

Prologue: One day, Jisung brings his nephew to swimming lessons with him. What appeared to be a third wheel, however, pulled you closer together.

Genre: Fluff

Wordcount: 973

Prompt: “Hang on! Where’s the baby?"

Warnings: Water [ swimming + drowning scare ]

It was sharp 3:55 pm by the clock when you opened the door to the arena. As it should have been, you were the first to arrive. It had never been a habit of yours to be late.

Providing part-time swimming lessons was something that could make you some money, and you badly needed it for college. You see, there was no wrong with utilising one’s talents for monetary profits.

You stepped out of your zipper jacket and trousers, leaving you solely in your blue nylon swimming gear while glancing at the clock again. It was about time your students started showing up.

"Hey! Y/N!" Just as you were about to jump into the pool, you heard a timid yet deep voice. That position was exceedingly uncomfortable, so you straightened yourself out and returned to the source of the call.

"Hi!" The boy repeated. "Say hi!" he said, suggesting a little boy who you assumed was barely five or six. "Hello!" The little one giggled.

"Hey, Jisung!" You started, "You’re quite early today." Ever since you started with this job, this boy struggled with time. It was quite rare to see him before time. Although you did not know him too well, you were sure he juggled many jobs and responsibilities.

"Oh." He started off with a small pout on his face. His grey hoodie obscured his hair, which was only visible on his forehead, where it glinted. His hands were firmly placed on the shoulders of the youngster. "I didn't mean to cause you any inconvenience, but..." He went on, pointing at the boy once more. "Hwan, he's my nephew."

"Hey there, Hwan! How have you been?" You interrupted in between, Jisung could simply nod at it. "Six." Hwan was the one who responded..

"Is it okay if he can be around here just for today? I’m actually babysitting him, and there is just nowhere else he could go at the moment." Jisung pleaded as you hummed your approval in the middle.

"Of course he can!" You agreed, further questioning Hwan, "Would you like to swim, little one?" You adjusted your gaze up to meet Jisung’s, requesting his approval. You'd always been awful with kids; you didn't know whether six-year-olds swam in the pool or not. "Ahh, Y/N, Hwan is actually rather excellent at it!" He swims quite well for his age!" He extolled the virtues of his adoring nephew.

"Unlike you, I guess." You guffawed.

You couldn't help but tease Jisung; the shy blush that appeared on his face every time you said something snarky was the finest part.

His gaze shifted to the ground, with the same expression as he scratched the back of his head. "Umm.. well.." He giggled timidly.

"Okay, It’s almost time, get changed up and then we’ll begin with everyone." You announced, noticing the arrival of the rest of your students.

Approximately half an hour later, you find yourself in the pool, struggling with Jisung. He could not help but crash into the lane ropes. Despite trying his best, there was still this problem with getting his strokes right.

"Just keep your chest in the same place while you push the water, and don't change the angle." You were going about your daily routine. Jisung had been attending these classes for about seven months, and he had never missed a single one. It was only natural for you to be genuine when instructing him.

"Let’s take a break." You suggested, He halted, pushing his black hair out of his face and to the back, getting rid of those swimming goggles, meanwhile you stared at his body. His white shirt was practically adhered to his skin, giving the impression that it was see-through. Interesting. His adorable face was at odds with his abdominal muscles.

"Y/N?" Jisung snapped his fingers, earning your attention. "Oh. Yeah. Right. Umm. You.." You stammered after being caught red handed. Your brain thought of all possible things that could revert to just like Jisung, you were trying your best. Trying your best not to embarrass yourself.

"Hang on! Where’s the baby!?" You shrieked.

"HWAN!" His face turned pale as he started to move around, his eyes in search of his nephew. You could not tell apart the sweat from the panic and the liquid from the pool. This was the first time you saw the otherwise calm and composed Jisung in a vulnerable state.

You both rushed out of the pool, which was large enough to accommodate a significant number of people at once and was divided into sections, as was the case at the time.

"I can not lose him like this! Where did he go?" He spoke with a worried tone in his voice. His eyes began to well up with tears. He continued, hyperventilating, "I am such an awful uncle!" His head was filled with pessimistic, fragmented notions.

"Hey hey hey! Jisung!" You leaned in closer, taking his hands in yours, encouraging him to take deeper breaths.

"Hwan.." He wept.

"Is right behind you." You implied.

Jisung's mouth was open as he glanced at you. This was possibly the first time he appeared to be offended by your humour. It wasn't a joke, though.

You held his arm and turned him around, pointing your finger. “There he is!” You made a gesture with your hand, pointing to the tiny child splashing through the water with his baby yellow fins, adding to his vivacious chuckles. Hwan wanted to be surrounded by babies his age rather than typical teenagers, or perhaps he despised the concept of being a third wheel.

"Hwan is terrific at it, already!" You appreciated. "Maybe I should start taking lessons from him instead." Jisung teased, his fingers interlocked with yours. This was the first time you've seen Jisung in this light.

Today was a day of many firsts.

LET ME KNOW YOUR VIEWS + ALSO SEE : MASTERLIST

PLEASE REFRAIN FROM PLAGIARIZING ,TRANSLATING, OR POSTING OUTSIDE THIS PLATFORM.

#nct soft hours #nct dream fluff #jisung blurb #jisung fluff #nct fluff #nct jisung #nct dream jisung #nct dream ff #nct dream #nct dream x reader #jisung x reader #jisung soft #soft nct #nct oneshot #jisung oneshot #nct blurbs #nct imagines

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calliopechild · 1 year

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15 Questions, 15 Mutuals

I was tagged by @eowyntheavenger 👍

Rules: answer the questions and tag fifteen mutuals

1. Are you named after anyone?

The first half of my middle name is my mom’s middle name, so...kinda?

2. When was the last time you cried?

Uh...hm. I’m drawing a blank other than laughing to the point of tears over a stupidly funny post last week.

3. Do you have kids?

No thank God and I never will.

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

Yes. I am a big fan of Sahara-dry sarcasm, and since I was blessed/cursed with a not insignificant case of Resting Bitch Face, I can deadpan pretty well to really play it up.

5. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Sense of humor, I guess? Or how easy they are to talk to.

6. What's your eye color?

Brown/hazel

7. Scary movies or happy endings?

Happy endings, please and thank.

8. Any special talents?

I own at puzzles/word games, and have a borderline photographic memory.

9. Where were you born?

*hums I Wish They All Could Be California Girls*

10. What are your hobbies?

Reading/writing fic, knitting, hiking, and I’ve been getting into paint-by-number kits. Also want to take up photography.

11. Any pets?

Sort of? I’ve been taking care of my sister and brother-in-law’s dog off and on for the last four years since they started having kids. He’s my furbaby in my heart, and I’ve claimed co-parent status.

12. What sports do you play/have played?

Soccer when I was in elementary/middle school.

13. How tall are you?

5′5″, which is bullshit because two of my guy cousins are 6′+, like “duck coming through doorways” levels of tall. At the very least, though, I’m about 2-3 inches taller than my (older) sister, so that’s the important thing.

14. Favorite subject in school?

English. If we’re talking specifics, the brief intro I got in a Medieval Lit class into the development of the English language from Old English (think Beowulf to Chaucer pipeline) to what we recognize as the language today was fascinating. If I ever get my schedule normalized enough to be able to juggle work + the course load, I’d love to audit some courses in linguistics.

15. Dream job?

Medical editor, which isn’t too far off from what I’m doing now, honestly. I’d like it to be more editing and less management, and in a more interesting field, but I’ve gotten more satisfaction out of the last 8 months of my new job than I did out of probably the last 8 years of my old one, so I think I’m on the right track.

---------

It’s not 15 mutuals, but here are a few, at least; no pressure to anyone, but if you’re interested, have at it. (And if we’re not mutuals but you’re following me and want to do this, consider yourself tagged!)

@kiterinsen, @shadowbends, @plothooksinc, @thorinds, @graphitehybrid

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bigbadripley · 1 year

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Chapter 9 - N. Michigan Gospel

Marc Spector/Steven Grant x Female!OC

Summary: Marc never expected to see his childhood friend Simone ever again. To Simone, Marc may as well have been dead. However, when Simone met Steven 15 years after Marc disappeared, she couldn’t help but notice how familiar he was.

Warnings: Heavy language, OC with religious trauma, childhood trauma, sexual trauma, the effects of this in adulthood, not much else in this one, just kinda cute.

A/N: I update warnings with each chapter. Only proceed if you can handle the themes included in the warnings. I wrote this entirely as a trauma dump.

Minors DNI, DL;DR, if I miss a warning, please let me know.

Chapter list

"Who do I take my broken pieces to? I don't think I can fix a broken piece of you If I hid away you'd find me anywhere I laid How do I justify my peace to you?" -"N. Michigan Gospel" by 99 Neighbors

Simone knew only one way to work through her troubles: to push herself into her job. She hadn't spoken to Marc or Steven in a few days, unsure what to do or where to begin.

Her one o'clock arrived on time, as always. She made sure to start a fresh pot of coffee for them and set everything up how she liked before they showed.

"How was your week, Jason?" Simone asked with a smile. She only knew it was Jason she was speaking to because of how he sat, spread-legged and hunched over. Jason shrugged,

"Alright, I guess. It's been a little tough." He answered. Simone knew the kind of troubles that Jason had, but she needed to ask, as always.

"Oh, yeah? What's been going on?" She wondered, crossing her right leg over her left to signify comfort in the conversation and coax honesty and openness from the patient.

During the brief patch of silence before Jason spoke again, there wasn't a single sound besides the clock ticking on her office wall. She kept meaning to take it down because of how nervous it made everyone, but she always forgot.

Finally, Jason cleared his throat and began. "Corey's been spending more time with Carrie lately."

Simone knew all the names and ages and didn't need further confirmation of their relationships, but played into it regardless. "Well, is Corey not Carrie's partner?"

"Yeah, but so are Lonnie and me." Jason answered. It was the same thing from Jason every week, and even though he didn't care for their visits, he took advantage of their time together.

"I suppose Corey doesn't feel like speaking to me today?" Simone wondered. Corey was the system's host: his body, but Jason was the protector. Jason typically takes over the beginning of the appointments due to Corey getting anxious.

"I guess it depends on if he decides to come back out," Jason said. It was the same event every time, and she knew Corey would come soon enough.

"We'll give him some time. How do Janet and Killian feel about Carrie?" She brought up the other two parts of the system. Whether her sheet says Corey Klein or not, they were all patients of Dr. Fredrick.

"They don't care for her, 'think she's weird for dating 3 of us at once, but what do they know?"

"Dating a host with four alters can be overwhelming," Simone said as she got up. And yet, I'm struggling to comprehend how to juggle a two-man system. She thought to herself. "Coffee?"

"Yes, please. And I think Janet and Killian's problem is that she only wants us. Maybe if Carrie opened up to the idea of dating the system, we wouldn't have so many problems." Jason suggested. Simone put two sugar cubes in the spare coffee mug she kept in her office that read "Trust Me I'm A Doctor" and stirred it. Black with no cream, just sugar, the way Corey liked it. She tapped the stirring staw on the side of the mug before she added to Jason's point,

"That's one way to look at it, but you also need to think: you just told me that you have issues with how she spreads attention between the three of you." Simone pointed this out as she sat a cup of coffee between them.

Jason stared blankly at the dark liquid on the table, unresponsive for a moment before he sat straight. Corey had arrived.

"Hey, Dr. Fredrick." He greeted in his normal mild-mannered tone. Even his voice was completely different from Jason's. Simone smiled and retook her seat,

"How's things with you, Corey?"

"Oh, you know, living the dream of a call center employee. Gotta love it." He joked as he picked up the coffee. Simone chuckled,

"So you're struggling with work?"

"Yeah, I got a less-than-perfect performance eval back, and it was because of my lost time."

"I'm guessing you don't mean skipping out of work?"

"I mean one of the roadies popping in unannounced while I'm working. Suddenly dissociating while talking with a customer isn't great for reviews... Isn't great when you're trying to have a good time with your girlfriend, either." He explained, referring to the parts of his system as his "roadies."

Simone thought about how this situation differed from Marc and Steven's and how Corey can't tell what happens when the others are present. She imagined how it would be more difficult that way.

"-I mean, really, Dr. Fredrick, how often do you get patients with this issue?" Corey asked, seeming genuinely curious if he was alone in this struggle. Simone hadn't realized she had zoned out from what he was telling her, but took it back to the last thing she heard,

"Well, I only have two other hosts as regulars, but I can say that they fear putting themselves out there with the stigma behind the disorder and the idea of having a relationship where the other parts are involved," Simone explained. "Do you feel that way at all?"

"I used to but... I've come to realize that I'm blessed, yeah? Carrie's great, and she's so understanding... and I love my system, but if I only had them for companionship? I'd lose my mind! I'd be as good as dead, to tell ya the truth!"

This struck a chord with Simone. She had been trying to tackle it all week. Begging for some reason to go forward with this awful idea of bringing Marc back into her life and pursuing this relationship with Steven further. Her reasons became clear, but she found herself wanting a second opinion.

While Simone was at work, Marc and Steven tried to put something special together for her in hopes of a truce. Steven wanted to take a gift of small things she enjoyed, while Marc wanted to take her somewhere she would like.

They were both lost in implementing these ideas and were working off borrowed time between the blips of missing time that seemed more frequent these days.

Marc cursed Steven for getting involved with Simone before they had a better grasp on this, but now they were on a mission to work things out with her, even if it felt selfish.

"I think if we got a wicker basket and put some nice things into it, that would be fine, yeah?" Steven suggested as they strolled the near-empty market. Marc thought the idea needed to be better and quickly made that known.

"No, no, no! That's too simple. We're trying to pursue a relationship, not play Easter Bunny." He said.

Regardless of their decision, they knew they needed something unique that wouldn't break the bank. Marc's stash away money was dwindling since separating from Khonshu a year prior, and they had not kept steady work due to conflicting interests.

Steven wanted to wait for Simone's input for date planning, fearing they might do too much or too little. "What if we dropped the gifts off at the office for her? A nice surprise that shows we're thinking about her."

The idea brought Marc back to when they were in school, and other kids would get gifts from their parents dropped off at school for Valentine's day. Even if the idea was superficial, it would make her happy. "That could work."

Simone went back to her place on her lunch to chow down on the Chinese takeaway she had put up from the night before. Once she arrived, she was pleasantly surprised to find Joyce in her loungewear, propping her feet up.

"How was Greece?" Simone asked as she pulled the paper box of rice from the fridge. Joyce scoffed,

"Been there over a dozen times, never gets old." She said. When Joyce spoke again, Simone grabbed a bowl from the cupboard and scooped the food into it for microwaveability. "How's your new man friend? You get some dick yet?" She asked nonchalantly.

Simone grinned and shook her head as she started nuking the rice. "What does that matter?"

"Because I live vicariously through you! I barely have time for myself, let alone men!" She defended. Simone turned around to face Joyce and braced herself on the counter,

"I did, actually." She admitted. Joyce swung her head forward and sighed,

"About time, innit? Been a dry year for you."

Simone realized she was in a unique situation where she felt it weird to talk about how it went with Joyce. Still, she realized she might be better suited to get the second opinion she wanted from the woman who not only knew her best but studied psychology for a year and a half before settling on being a pilot.

Do you mind playing therapist for a moment? She asked, ignoring the beep from the microwave. Joyce put her feet back on the ground and sat up, scooting to the edge of the recliner,

"I'm all ears." She said. Simone grabbed the rice bowl and sat in the living room on the loveseat next to Joyce.

"So, you know how I was saying Steven- my man friend, as you said- looked familiar, but I could put my finger on how?"

"I do remember that, but what does it have to do with your getting laid?" Joyce wondered. Simone took a deep breath and began explaining the events that transpired between her and Steven, then overexplaining how Steven and her old friend Marc were the same.

Once Simone had explained everything, Joyce stared at her for a long while, and Simone swore she saw the gears turning in her head as she built a diagram of what it all meant before she finally said something.

"Your first love Marc and your new flame Steven are the same bloke, and you didn't know that until after you slept with them? Red flag central, Simone!"

"I know, Joyce, but is it bad that I'm considering this?" Simone asked, feeling stupid saying it out loud. Joyce shrugged,

"You want two boyfriends? You barely have luck keeping one, no offense."

"None taken, I know I do, and that's why it seems so crazy to me, but I can't stop thinking about both of them. I just don't know what to do."

"The rational play therapist Joyce wants to tell you that you should let sleeping dogs lie and forget about what you used to have with Marky-Marc, and if you can't have his funky bunch without him, then break it off." Joyce started. The analogy made Simone laugh, even if the context made her heart ache slightly. "But, the hopeless romantic Joyce wants you to go for it and see what happens."

Simone considered it momentarily as she picked at the mound of rice and veggies, thinking of how her session with Corey went.

Can I be as patient as Carrie? She wondered to herself. Simone suddenly felt less hungry and more nervous as she thought up how to approach Steven and Marc with this. Instead of stressing, she did the one thing she knew to do best: throw herself back into work.

When Simone returned to the office, she was met with a gift basket on her desk. The basket contained dark chocolates (her favorite), gel pens (the superior kind), a legal pad (she was running out of new pages), Star Wars stickers (for fun), and a big bag of Haribo's Twin Snakes (her candy of choice when she was a kid) and to top it all off, a card with a pug on the front that said: "Get Excited!" with "Much love, Marc and Steven" written on the inside.

What a couple of fuckin' sweethearts. She thought to herself as she grinned uncontrollably. Every bit of what they got related to something they knew about her if they paid attention, which they clearly did.

Simone pulled her phone out and took a picture of the basket where she found it, and sent it to Steven's phone with a caption that read:

Thank you both! Meet me at mine about 6.

To Steven and Marc, this meant mission accomplished.

#moon knight #moon knight fan fic #moon knight fanfic #marvel #marvel fanfic #marvel mcu #fan fiction #fan fic #mcu fanfiction #mcu #mcu fic #fanfic #marc spector #steven grant #angst

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ouroboobos · 9 months

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im front end manager + have all the responsibilities of head cashier + am in charge of the key department and i would literally get paid more starting at mcdonalds. and like dont get me wrong im not saying people at mcdonalds shouldnt make as much as they do, they should make way more actually, but like. its kind of bold how my boss is always making these snide jokey comments about working fast food or walmart or whatever and i would literally make more over there lmfao

its even more insulting because we get voted the best hardware store in the county every year and customers are always raving about how much they love us and and yet they continue to pay us absolute shit. when we won again this year they gave us a fucking pizza party from papa johns. thanks for the pepperoni i guess but how about a fucking bonus every now and again you stingy little assholes. almost everyone in every position is chronically stressed because they're trying so hard to juggle so much every single day and they can barely even pay their rent. im doing like 3 peoples jobs because every time someone on the front end quits they just give me their responsibilities without the title or the raise because its cheaper to have one person do it than hire new employees. they should feel lucky we havent started cutting peoples heads off yet. sorry i had a bad day at work

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theghostus · 1 year

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Hey, you...

It's been 6 months since my last update. Fuck.

Since then, I've had 2 jobs. Both are full-time, yet something in them didn't click for me.

My first job was at a physio clinic. I thought, well, during the interview, the Head of Operations summarised the job involved simple 4 things. I was like, cool, it was something I could do. Just do the damn job and go home. Turns out, it needs a lot of my peopling skills. Juggling to do the daily job (talking and scheduling appt based on the treatment plan given), the needing to follow up with clients (and no-show ones) to the daily closing. Not including the therapists' different personalities. The daily meetings (omg). At the end of the day, I was emotionally exhausted. I was stretching myself thin. When I was hired, there were 3 of us. One by one, quit due to reasons, including yours truly. The management assured me they would be hiring more, but I couldn't see myself doing the same thing repeatedly without completing the tasks set out the day before. I don't know what this is. I supposed it's the perfectionist in me, or I'm just nuts.

For the next job, I succumbed to desperation. I agreed blindly, which I came to regret tremendously. The first day was suspiciously relaxed. After all, it's the first day. Lots of writing in my notebook (god damn, y'all don't know how many notebooks I've gone through) and taking the lead from my senior. The second day was a little more hectic but still able to cope with my senior help. Third to the Fourth day, she was on MC. That's when things took a dive. The other admin (seniors) started to push coz they saw me doing nothing. Like, duh, my senior taught me for 2 days; how would I know what I was supposed to do. Oh oh...I forget to tell you. They actually keep track of what tasks admins do. I mean for every 15 min interval. Made me key in all the tasks I had done for the day. Honestly, on the first day, I realised this job was not for me, but I still gave the job a chance. Maybe just maybe, this is just a fluke, you know. Like the day I came in happened to be a busy day. Nope, I was wrong. I was hired as a receptionist with a 45min lunch. Wow. I had to take the mail daily during my lunch. You know why, so the person covering me can update me if anything comes (courier, incoming docs) during lunchtime. Cool. I thought Chinatown was bad...fucking hell, the area was worse. Only 1 Malay food (okay, okay, I'm not exactly practising Muslim, but still, if I'm going eat the Indian food there, it's going dig into my savings) and 7-11 for lunch. Plus, I need my daily cig input. Already I was sucking 4 sticks a day. Sigh. Still, I preserved, hoping I could get through the week. On the fourth day, the senior admin lead gave me a 2hr one to one tutor. So I'm expected to understand and master MYOB in 3-4 days. Well, she didn't need to. She said since she was free, she could. Her time, her call. Each day, I found it hard to complete the timesheet as I didn't meet the 8.75 hrs.

So the Fifth day came, and my senior was still on leave. The lead senior (asst to manager *eye roll*) had expectations that I to be an outgoing person, which I never was when we first met. I know I'm supposed to fake until I make it, but I can no longer do that. Maybe because I have nothing that drives me like before (the evil house). Yes, I'm an anxious empath. I guess that's the problem. I have always found it hard to approach people. I always try to read their body language and expressions. Well, back to the bitch. She got frustrated because I didn't ask the accounts for their dustbins. After all, they always do their housekeeping (vacuuming, throwing the rubbish in the baskets) on Fridays. I mean, 1 team were out for a meeting, so I was supposed to tell them about the throwing the rubbish thing. However, when I thought my other colleague (let's call her Shorty) had informed them, I mean, let's divide and conquer for the 1st week, right? Nope. Strike 1. That's not what the bitch wants me to do. "When I told you to tell/ask/check them for their waste basket, I don't need to tell you how to do right?" So I went to tell/ask/check the rest of the office and collect the rest of them. By then, I had already gone down with Shorty to the bin and returned. "You have to tell/ask/check coz they're busy with work. Now you have to go down again!" Strike 2. After everything has settled, my manager asks to see her. She discussed with me how my week was going. Obviously, I got complained, yet she said I 'observed'. She said all the BS that I knew was coming. I lied again about the difficulties I had. Then she mentioned I opened the wrong client mail and 'explained' the importance of checking and making sure. I truly believed that I was right. Till I check again, to my horror. I opened the wrong mail. Strike 3. I had to cover my tracks. I notice one of the mail is missing. I assumed that's how she knew. I told myself to fuck it. I don't care about the job anymore. I was so mad at myself and everyone I left without switching off the lights and the mail on the table. When I reached the train station, my conscience didn't allow me to board. Thankfully I had not tapped in. I turned around and walked back 10mins. Grabbed the mail, walked 10 mins to the mailbox, and boarded the train. It was the only right thing I had to do when I served my notice on Monday.

Both jobs, of course, the hirer was shocked. I didn't give a damn about what they thought. As usual, I lied; otherwise, they would want to rectify what went wrong. At least at the clinic, I had a few folks chat with me, not about the job. I was super miserable at the accounting firm. I know I said I don't need anyone. Besides but no one went to lunch at the same time as me except the bitch and shorty. The first day, the bitch offered to have lunch together my brain wanted to say yes, but my mouth said no. Good thing I didn't.

So now I'm still unemployed.

It's 3 days till Xmas. One week till 2023.

3 months till my 40th.

Sigh.

I still have this MOE interview pending next year. That's my last full-time interview. After this, I'm done.

I'm just looking for temp jobs...I can't handle the pressure of expectations and being around people. Gonna look for WFH job if I can find one. At least it saves me the transport and lunch money.

Sigh.

2023. Please be kind.

21/12/22

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alsjeblieft-zeg · 1 year

Text

454 of 2022

what is the second to last letter of your first name? : R. how bout the last letter of your last name? : E. 5th letter of your middle name? : N. what time was it 17 minutes ago? : 13:56. when was the last time you ate your favorite food? : A few days ago. what food is that? : Waterzooi. describe the shoes you wore today : None, I didn't even leave the house. do you drink coffee? : I do, but in small amounts. what song are you currently listening to? : Tourist LeMC - Koning Liefde. tell me a line from that song : how long has your favorite animal been your favorite animal? : My whole life. when was the last time you spoke to your mom? : Today, over texting. tell me about something interesting you did today : Started preparing Christmas gifts. do you have a job? where? : I'm an electrician in the big, French rail transport company. what is your pet (if you have one) doing right this second? : Sleeping. what kind of pet is that? : Two cats. Both are sleeping. what is/was your favorite subject in school? : Physics. do you have an instagram?: I do, but only for my photography. if so how many posts do you have? : Over 700, I guess. Too lazy to check. have you ever been to Europe? : I live in Europe and I was born here, and never left. if so, what country(ies)?: I'm from Belgium, I've been to France, the Netherlands, Germany, Denmark and Poland. what's your favorite number? : 16. does that number have any particular significance to you? : I just like it. what did you buy the last time you went to the mall? : We don't have a mall in my city, and they're rare in my country as well. what battery percent is your phone at right now? : 61. can you juggle? : I can't. I lack coordination. what do you expect to be doing in 3 hours from now? : Laundry, finally. have you ever done any acting/theater? : No, not interested. how is your hair currently styled? : I just put some gel in it. do you have a pinterest? : No, I don't. if so are you addicted to it like me? : Not at all. do you know anyone who lives in Massachusetts? : Probably, I might not even know about it. what's the last movie you saw in theaters?: Colette in 2018, didn't go to the cinema since then, and I just did it for my friend. did you enjoy it? : I didn't really care much. what's your favorite color combination? : Black and neon green. can you speak any foreign languages? if so, which one(s)? : English is the foreign language to me, my native language is Dutch. I know some French, German, Polish and Russian, but it's nowhere near fluent. say something in said language: (and its translation): Goedenamiddag, hoe gaat het met jou? / Good afternoon, how are you? what are your plans for tomorrow? : Going to the health insurance company. have you ever visited the location of your favorite movie? : I don't have favourite movies. I don't even like movies at all. ever read The Book Thief? (if not you should, it's really good): I don't think I did, thanks for recommendation! what's been the best part of your summer so far? : Travelling a lot. how do you typically watch movies? : I DON'T WATCH MOVIES. do you know what boomwhackers are? : No idea. how about a vibraslap? : Neither. what's the last thing you took a picture of? : Tram timetable. what's your computer's wallpaper? : A random photo of aurora borealis. how about your phone? : A photo of a Dutch rapper, Baas B. It's been taken 17 years ago and he looks so good on it <3 what's the last thing you watched on youtube? : Something about conspiracy theories. how many facebook friends do you have? (if you have facebook): I don't have Facebook. do you use vsco? : I have no idea what it is. what kind of phone do you have? : Samsung Galaxy A53. are you musically inclined? : I don't know. I've made some mash-ups and remixes in the past, I have one song that's been entirely mine, I can sing apparently, and I have great memory for melodies. But I don't play any instrument or whatever. if so, in what way(s)? : Just explained above. do you prefer to type in word or google docs? : Word 4 lyfe. XD what color is your water bottle? : I don't drink water. are you smart?? : If you believe my IQ then yes, it's higher than average. besides basic human nessecities what's one thing you can't live without?: Music. what religion are you? : Agnostic. have you ever seen your favorite animal in real life? : I have two cats, so obviously. tell me about a song that has personal significance to you: Lange Frans & Baas B - Ik Wacht Al Zo Lang. It's asking about the meaning of life. what are your opinions on Hamilton? : I don't know what it is. does your cat purr really loud? (if you have a cat) : Yes, both do. One of them is like a teddy bear, she's so snuggly and there's absolutely no aggression in her. does your cat have major mood swings? : The younger one does. She's purring one minute, then hissing and trying to bite, then she comes back to us, purring again. who do you admire? : My husband. He's not afraid of confrontation. last time you went to starbucks, what did you order? : My friend bought me a caramel latte there last Friday. have you ever gotten a really good grade on a test you didn't study for?: Many times. how about a bad grade when you studied really hard? : Happened, too. I struggled with learning history in school. what's your favorite book you had to read for school?: The Catcher in the Rye. how about your favorite book in general? : The Legend of Ice People. ever heard of the musical Honk!? (the ! goes with the title): Nah, it must be 'not a thing' here. have you ever met your favorite celebrity? : No, but I was close. I visited the city he lives in :( who is that person? : Baas B <3 17 years and counting. how many times have you seen your favorite movie? : I'm gonna skip all the movie questions, sorry. can you count to 100 in any languages other than English? : English is not my native language, so it speaks for itself :P when was the last time you went to the beach? : Yesterday. what's your dream concert? : Baas B, obviously. what state do you live in? : I don't live in any state. I was born and raised in Europe, which I've never left. have you ever been in a youtube video? : Hopefully not. how about in the newspaper? : Nah. on TV? : Not at all. on the radio? : No. do you prefer to call, text, or email people? : Text, it's quick. what's your dream job? : I wanted to join the army, but yeah, health issues. last time you were in a theater/concert hall/auditorium what was it for?: I don't remember, it's been ages. do you have pierced ears? : Five times, 3 piercings in my left ear and 2 in my right ear. what's your favorite grocery store?: Delhaize. tell me a line from a song you particularly love: do you like elephants?: Sure. They're very smart. how about giraffes? : I don't mind them, but they're not my favourite. describe the shirt you're wearing? : I'm not wearing any shirt. It's a hoodie and it's red and has a Belgium print on it. what did you have for lunch?: Some Italian ham. is it sunny outside?: Not at all. Back to usual Belgian weather. can you stand on your head? : No. I'm not even going to try. what's your favorite restaurant?: Lunch Garden, I'm simple. would you rather travel to the past or the future?: The past, maybe I'd avoid something. what's the best gift you've ever received? : Someone's love when I needed it the most. describe your perfect day: A day out with friends and/or travelling to somewhere else. did you have chicks in your class in elementary school?: I'm sorry, I don't understand this question. do you doodle in your notebooks? : Happens sometimes. I was doing it in secondary school a lot. what month is your birthday in? : April. how many times a day do you brush your teeth?: At least twice. when did you last change a lightbulb?: Long time ago. what's the last song you sang? : 't Hof Van Commerce - Stuntman. It's a hip hop song :P do you know anyone who had a baby recently? : Not recently, no. Unless my friend's son counts, he and his girlfriend has a baby last month or so. do you avoid the cracks on the sidewalk?: I tend to do it still. name 3 things in your refridgerator: Eggs, cheese, butter. have you ever won an award? : Yeah, in photography contest. last time you had ice cream, what flavor?: Oreo, I think. do you support gay marriage? : Of course. I'm gay and married as well, so. what other tabs do you currently have open?: YouTube, personal diary, and other surveys on here. what's the 4th song in your iTunes under letter S? : I don't use iTunes, never did. the 2nd song under letter M?: N/A. do you prefer to travel by car or plane? : Car. I've never been on a plane anyway. what internet browser do you use? : Firefox on my laptop. what's the hardest song you've ever had to learn?: I can't think of any. what's your favorite kitchen utensil? : Fork. how do you feel about ducks? : I'm pretty indifferent to them. ever ridden a horse?: Never. Not interested. can you eat with chopsticks? : I can, but I don't like it. do you know what imbakwa moyo means? (without looking it up): No. tell me a line from the song you're currently listening to: have you ever been to a u-pick berry farm? : I've been working as a fruit picker in my teens. are you good at dancing? : No, never cared. would you like to swing on a star? : ...excuse me? have you ever forgotten to do your homework? : Too many times. do you like Shakespeare? : I don't mind his works. if so, which play is your favorite?: I don't have favourites, all of them are good. are there certain words/phrases that trigger songs in your brain?: I don't think so. would you rather read a book or watch a movie? : Read a book, 100%. who sent the last text message you received?: Something from my dad, about my mum cooking Christmas dinner. don't you hate that rainbow spinning wheel on the computer?: What? Never seen it except for a CD. how many minutes are in a year? : 525,600. do you only know that from Seasons of Love? : I don't even know what Seasons of Love is. what's your favorite article of clothing? : Hoodies and these so-called do you prefer even or odd numbers?: Even. I don't like things with no pair. ever heard a hammer dulcimer? : No, I don't think so. do you enjoy going to the library? : I buy books, not borrow. when did you last write someone an actual letter?: 20 years ago or something? what's the last gift you received?: Something from my husband. did you know that strawberries and raspberries are not actually berries?: We learn biology as a mandatory subject in my country, thanks. :P well now you do. they are aggregate fruits. : Didn't you forget aboput something? are you good at spelling? : I'm trying to be. can you roll your r's : I don't, but many people in my country do. can you lick your elbow? : No, but I'm double-jointed in other ways. touch your toes without bending your knees? : Sure. do you have a twitter?: I do, but I don't even use it. I should just delete it. do you recycle? : It's mandatory in my country. how about compost? : I don't have a garden. This type of trash is in separate bags and taken away by the company. when's the last time you rode the bus?: Yesterday. what's the longest vacation you've been on? : Two months in school break. what's your favorite kind of donut? : Anything but sugar. what's your favorite song to dance to? : I don't dance. do you own anything from Vera Bradley?: No, I don't. when you go in a pool do you jump in or use the ladder?: I don't go to the pool. do you have perfect pitch? : No, but I'm close. what's your mom's name? : Ellen. do you have an uncle called Steve? : No. do you have multiple friends with the same name? : I have a friend who shares name with me, but yeah, I'm friends with several guys named Dirk. do you play neko atsume? : I don't know what it is. what did you think of The Fault In Our Stars? : I've read a book, it was good. did you prefer the book or the movie? : I don't care about movies. do you like yogurt? : I love yogurt. what was your favorite song 5 years ago? : Leader by Katatonia, still love this song. how about 10 years ago? : The same. do you like riding on carousels? : No, I hate it. ever played with a pinwheel? : Like, paper windmill? Sure. do you like museums? : Some of them are very cool. if so, what type is your favorite? : Not art, that's for sure. is your bedroom a mess? : Typically yes. what's your favorite thing to eat at Thanksgiving? : I'm European, we don't celebrate Thanksgiving, whatever it is. ever had a treehouse? : No, not really. have you ever seen a kangaroo in real life? : No. a year ago today, what were you doing? : Recovering in the hospital, learning to walk. are you procrastinating on something? : Laundry, still :P do you have a brother? : No, but I wish I had. a sister? : Yes, one younger sister. do you know what a pandereta is? : Heard it somewhere, but I don't remember. are you currently reading a book? : Yes, The Legend of Ice People. what book is it? : Just said. It has 47 parts and I'm at 40 or so. how are you today??: Okay so far. when's the last time you used a dictionary? : Very long ago. which do you dislike more, doctor or dentist? : Dentist, hands down. My doctors are okay. what's the last thing you searched on google? : Train timetable. do you ever have conversations via text/email with people in the same room?: No, but we send funny videos to each other. what was your favorite book when you were a little kid? : Pelle Svanslös. ever owned a pet bunny? : Yes, we used to have rabbits. how about a goldfish? : No, just other fish. what color hair do you have? : Dark brown. what did you eat for dinner? : It's too early for dinner yet. what song, if any, is currently stuck in your head? : Kraantje Pappie - Pompen. It's funny. are you right handed or left handed? : Ambidextrous, but with dominant left hand. Sadly, my left hand got paralysed last year, so I use my right by force. what website did you last visit? (besides this one): YouTube. what time do you usually go to bed? : 11pm or so. have you seen the movie Miracles From Heaven? : No, and I don't think I will. what is your opinion on muffins?: Some are okay. do you remember your locker combination?: We use locks with keys. do you listen to classical music?: Sometimes. I appreciate all kinds of music. ever take buzzfeed quizzes? : Yeah, but they're dumb, in my opinion. what's your favorite store? : Bershka. when's the last time you were onstage? : Never? does it snow where you live? : It was snowing last Friday. Melted quickly, though. do you like pasta? : I do, pretty much. how about chinese food? : Same as above. do you prefer to color with markers or colored pencils?: Coloured pencils. do you usually look good in pictures?: Not at all lol. I look like an ugly teenager. describe the case on your phone: Metallic blue. what kind of shoes did you wear today? : None, I didn't leave the house. have you seen any plays/musicals recently? : No, not interested. what's your favorite thing you've been for Halloween? : I don't celebrate Halloween. what do you like to eat at the movies? : I don't go to the movies. what was your favorite TV show when you were 10? : How can I remember, it was 22 years ago. do you have neat handwriting? : Not much, but it's unique. I write with my right hand by must, though. what's your favorite quote? : --- when did you last have a glass of water? : I don't drink water. what's your shoe size? : 42 in European. do you wish you were older or younger? : Younger, definitely. do you have more than one best friend? : I do indeed. what book are you currently reading? : There was this question already. I'm not gonna repeat myself. is your room messy? : Same here. when did you last brush your teeth? : This morning. are you wearing socks? : Yeah, I am. are your nails painted? : I'm a dude, I don't paint my nails. why do people park in a driveway and drive on a parkway? : I have neither, not my business. is the glass half empty or half full? : Half full. where was the last beach you went to? : Albertstrand, Knokke-Heist. why does the dentist talk to you when they have stuff in your mouth? : To cheer you up? really, though. when did you last get a haircut?: Three months ago, oops. how many lights are on in the room you're in? : Floor lamp. do you like wolves? : Sure I do. what are the first 3 digits of your phone number? : +32 lol. how long is the song you're currently listening to?: 3:17. have you ever bought anything on etsy? : A few times. do you prefer breakfast or dinner? : Lunch. have you ever experienced a tornado? : No, they don't really occur here. a hurricane? : Yeah, several times. an earthquake? : Mild ones, twice in my life or so. do you like sushi? : I do, but not with cucumber. are you registered to vote? : Yeah, voting is mandatory in my country. when did you last eat waffles? : This year, was it April? It was in Lommel. do you wear glasses? : Yes, I do. I suffer from lens dislocation in both eyes. do you like spicy food? : Very much so. do you like your neighbors? : Some are cool, some are assholes. do you play 2048? : No, I don't. what's your dream college? : I have two degrees already. have you ever been to Africa? : No, I haven't. have you seen your favorite movie more than 5 times? : Skipping this, thanks. what did you last post on facebook?: Skipping this, too. do you use a mouse or a trackpad? : Wireless mouse. what's your favorite word? : Godverdomme. what voice part are you? : Like, a type? Tenor for sure. how is your hair currently styled? : I put some gel in it. how much caffeine have you had today? : None. where do you typically do your grocery shopping? : Lidl. do you know anyone who has a birthday soon? : Yeah, a few friends. when did you last receive mail? : Yesterday. what was it? : A Christmas card. are you sitting on a chair? : No, I'm not. what did you last watch on youtube? : I feel like I've answered this question three times already. is your bedroom upstairs or downstairs? : Upstairs. are you wearing any jewelry? : My wedding ring. do you prefer sunrises or sunsets? : Sunrises. Sunsets are depressing to me. have you ever seen Wicked? : No. (if you have) what's your favorite song from it? : --- what's your favorite game on your phone? : I don't play games. do you take surveys a lot? : I do, but I prefer when questions are not repetitive. do you wear a watch? : No, I don't. what was your biggest accomplishment of the day?: There will be when I finally do the laundry. did you ever have an American Girl doll? : Never played with dolls. how about webkinz? : I don't know it. have you ever seen the awesome fountain in the detroit airport? : I've never been to the US. ever thought you saw someone you know but it turned out to be a stranger? : Once or twice. what web browser do you use? : Yet another question I've answered already. are you wearing shorts? : No, it's winter. what do you wish you could do this summer? : Summer is long gone already. have you ever skipped school? : A few times. has a song ever freaked you out cause the volume was up too loud? : Yeah, more than once. do you have an ipad? : No, I'm not interested in anything Apple. is there anyone who you miss even though you don't know them very well?: Yeah, this one student. We know each other in person, but we've only seen each other for, like, two months, then he came back to uni and I haven't heard from him since then. :( what's your favorite time period in history? : I don't know, Victorian era? when's the last time you were in a church? : 25 years ago? Something like that. how do you typically watch movies? : Skipping this, thanks. I'm sick of all these movie questions already. besides money, what would you like a lifetime supply of? : Music. do you like rain? : No, I hate it. I live in a very rainy country. do you shop at thrift stores? : Sometimes. look behind you! what's there? : That floor lamp. who did you last talk to outside the family? : My workmate. can you touch your tongue to your nose? : No, I can't. what/who do you fangirl/boy over? : Baas B, always and forever <3 where does your dad work? : He's retired. have you ever caught a fish? : Once. do you play candy crush? : I don't. flappy bird? : Never heard of it. do you have an ipod? : No, and I'm not going to have. do you celebrate christmas? : Yes, I do. how many songs do you know all the words to? : Over 1000, it seems. when did you last eat a donut? : Last year or something like that. what's your favorite ride at the fair/amusement park?: I hate them all. what are 3 things you want to do before you die? : Meet my *celebrity crush*, visit Paris, travel the world. have you ever shopped on redbubble? : Many times. I love nerdy custom made hoodies. what is on the walls of your bedroom? : A clock and the calendar. what brand of toothpaste do you use? : Signal. what do you wear to bed? : Nothing at all. do you eat seafood? : It's typical in my country, but I don't like seafood. who do you admire? : My husband, I said it already. what color is your computer? : Black. do you do your own laundry? : If I do the laundry, I do it for everyone. If my husband does, then he does it for everyone. ever broken a bone? : No, never. My bones are ridiculously strong. what restaurant did you last go to? : Chinese Wok, I think that was the name. I went with friends. what do you spend most of your money on? : Travels. when did you last see your cousins? : One of them, last year. when's the last time you saw a rainbow? : A few months ago. when's the last time you were on a boat? : A few years ago. what time do you usually get up? : 7:30. do you like fluffy cats? : I love all cats. what's your favorite time of year? : Summer. what's the most beautiful song you know? : Lange Frans & Baas B - Ik Wacht Al Zo Lang. what's your favorite stuffed animal? : I don't like stuffed animals. what do you put in your ice cream sundae?: Caramel. any plans for the weekend? : It's Sunday. is it sunny outside? : It's getting dark, but it wasn't sunny anyway. have you read the hunger games? : Tried, I got bored of it. can you speak Spanish? : No, but I wish. do you like enchiladas? : Never tried. what's your favorite quote? : ---

#survey #random survey #q&a survey

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nurchantiqa-adifa · 2 years

Text

him.

4 June 2022.

I told you, " I miss you" and you told me you missed me too.

I told you i'll be in the city for a few days, hoping you'd reply saying you wanted to see me. You didn't. My message was left on read, and god, i feel stupid. Should i have waited longer before sending that? Should i just forget about you? I'm stupid aren't I? You're never gonna love me back. Sometimes i wonder, what is it that i like in you? You treat me so fucking cold most of the times, you make it obvious that whatever we have is purely sexual. You don't speak to me if i don't start the conversation. You don't show me any interest at all. Dates? Never. If i don't ask, you don't tell. What is it, really, that i am longing for from you? I don't know.

See, i have a very fragile and stupid heart. It falls for the wrong person, for all the wrong reason. But i promise, this will pass. I will stop chasing, expecting, hoping and wanting you. Just give me time and in the meantime, I'm sorry if you see all those sad quotes i post constantly on my status or IG story. Those aren't for you, really. It's just a coping mechanism for me to feel like i am indeed moving on, even though i know i'm not.

Some days it sucks, but i can only hope that this will soon go, this feelings will soon fade with time. I know it will, I'm just tired of having you on my mind 24/7 right now. I have so many shit to do with my life, juggling new job, new positions, court cases, and yet whenever i pause my mind just keeps drifting back to you. I wonder if you think of me the same way i think of you, if I ever pop up in your thoughts in the midst of your days, or when you're driving home from work, do you look beside and miss my presence? I know you dont. It's all in my head.

IT'S ALL IN MY HEAD, EVERYTHING THAT I THOUGHT YOU WERE, WAS ALL A MADE UP THING IN MY FUCKING HEAD.

Those times where i thought you genuinely liked me for who i am, or when you made me feel like i actually mattered in your life, all those feelings, emotions weren't what you projected. It was all a fucking made up thing in my head, the thoughts that i wanted you to feel.

I felt too much and now it hurts so much.

I guess I'll have another journey to go on now - moving on. I hope someday i can convince myself that you and everything i feel for you is just a phase. It will pass - and time will heal. You aren't as good a person as what i pictured you to be. Under all those, you're really just another guy i met. I will manifest this to come true, one day.

For now, please let me love you and all that you are in my head.

Thank you for making 3 months of my life a memorable one, thank you for easing my way a little, for being such a great convenience when you'd go with me to and fro work, for introducing me to your friends, for being you, and for being there.

Now, all I need is to breathe all by myself. I am tired of saying the words I don't want to say, but I said them anyway because that's something you need to hear. Now, I have mastered seeing exits in your phrases. Now, I stopped hoping for something constant, something stable. If they want to leave, I'll let them.

As long as they don't turn me against myself, they're free to go.

"This is not goodbye forever, i'll see you again in 2 weeks time". I knew that was a lie, i believed you anyways. I wanted so badly to believe I will see you again. I guess not, too bad, Dee.

I will pretend i don't miss you, and i will pretend i don't care. I hope i'm not much of a nuisance in your life anymore. Take care, and as of this moment, I love you - not forever, but long enough in this moment.

-Dee, 6 June 2022.

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primofate · 3 years

Text

Genshin Modern AU - Stress and Comfort

Summary: Woke up late. Missed a class. Forgot that assignment due. Another one due in two days. People are downplaying the things that you do. It’s raining and you don’t have an umbrella. Sometimes the little things pile up all in one day and it feels like all you want to do is to get it over with... and your boyfriend to make everything better.

Warnings: crying, stress, mood swings, other than that it’s fluff

Characters: Kaeya, Zhongli x gn!reader

Notes: Also a commission <3 Thank you for the love. Once again if you want something written for you I have cheap rates XD and I’ll always accommodate to your wants! Just leave me a message!

Kaeya

“Hey, Y/N, do you know how to write this part of the essay?” It wasn’t as if you were a particularly good student. But somehow, the people in your class liked asking you because you were accommodating. Ready to help with a smile on your face. Always there to turn to and rely on. “Yeah, it’s just like this…” and you spend nearly an hour explaining it.

“Oh gosh, I don’t think I can finish this part of the presentation tonight, something came up at home,” Group projects were sometimes difficult too. You understood. Things happened, but when they happened, you’d be the first one to say, “It’s okay, I’ll take care of it,” Even though the presentation is tomorrow, even though you barely get enough sleep for the next day. A part of you just wants to quickly get it over with.

“You said this would come out on the test… It wasn’t even there…” The worst part of it is not even receiving any thanks. It’s the way that they look at you when you make a mistake, despite all of the good things you’ve done for them, one mistake, and they make you out and guilt you to be a bad person.

“Your analysis is all wrong, Y/N. This part over here…” Sometimes the price of that was paying with your own grade. You try to listen as the lecturer explains a part of your essay. You’re listening, but it just doesn’t register in your mind. Something about misunderstanding the concept. Those concepts that you’ve tried so hard to remember and to understand. In the end they were all mixed up and confused.

Perhaps the lecturer sees the deflated look in your eyes, and ends quite happily. “Just do better in the next one!” pats your back and lets you leave, handing you your essay graded with a C.

Do better in the next one. Easier said than done.

You shove the paper in your bag without giving it a second glance.

The cafeteria. It was slightly late for lunch but you like it that way. There weren’t a lot of people at this time, which meant you didn’t have to fight for seats. Still, as you put in your order and bring your tray of food to the nearest seat that you see, you somehow bump into someone who topples over your chosen lunch, the tray completely doing a flip and landing on your chest, then on the ground with a plop and rattle.

There’s an ugly stain on your shirt. Forget about hiding it, it had to be washed. “Oh my gosh I’m so sorry,” and yet they can only stare at the stain. What else could they do? Dabbing it with wet tissue would just make it worse. “It’s…fine,” you wave them away, but you leave the mess on the floor in a hurry and in an embarrassed state.

You sigh once outside again. Deciding that today was enough, you make your way home.

Even then, as you sit at your study table, all washed up and changed, sketching a little something on your tablet, your mother stands at the door, observing.

“…What does that do for you?”

You jump a little in surprise and turn, looking at her blank expression. “What does what do for me?”

“That, your drawing. You’re always on the computer or tablet Y/N. If not that, then your sketchbook. That’s all you ever do,”

You turn around because you don’t want to argue. You don’t want to hear her complaining about how you do nothing but stay in all day after lessons and play games and draw. It was one of the biggest forms of comfort you had for yourself and yet she--

“Maybe try a part time job or join a club or some—”

“Mom, I’m still trying to adjust to uni,”

Why does no one understand how difficult it is to juggle the classes and do all the readings required? Why do I have to do so many things all at the same time? Can’t I do it when I choose to and when I’m ready? Can’t I do things that I enjoy?

“The degree you chose won’t even pay the bills…” You hear her mutter as she walks away. Footsteps receding into the hallways.

You push your tablet away and lay your head face down on the table. You’re trying not to lose it and finally, whatever higher being up there hears your plea to give you a break.

A phone call from Kaeya comes through.

“…Hey,” you answer.

“Hey, hun. You haven’t been replying to my messages,” there’s a lilt of playfulness in his voice. He just thinks you’ve fallen asleep or taken a nap at home or something.

“…Yeah, I—” You try to explain. You try to say that you weren’t feeling well. That you didn’t feel like talking. But would he understand? Everyone today seemed to be against you. “I just, fell asleep,” You lie and there’s a few seconds of silence on the other side.

“…You sure?” Now there’s a hint of unease in his voice. The playfulness is gone. “You ok? Do you want me to come over?” Somehow he senses that it isn’t just “falling asleep”. His simple worry and caring attitude towards you breaks whatever composure you had left. You accidentally let out a sniffle as tears start to pool in your eyes.

“Hey… You don’t have to talk to me, but I’ll come over right now, okay?” The sniffle was enough to tell him that perhaps something had went wrong. You couldn’t help but let out a few more sniffles as tears slowly trickles down your face.

“O-okay,”

Minutes later your blue-haired boyfriend shows up at your doorstep. Despite your mom being a little hard on you earlier, when she opens the door to see him, she smiles and says. “I think they were having a bad day, I might have been a little harsh on them too,” Kaeya only grins and points a thumb to his chest. “No problem, that’s what I’m here for,” He’s still wearing his volleyball jersey.

He knocks softly on the door, “Y/N?” there’s a plastic bag in his other hand.

When you open the door your eyes were already a little red around the edges, but seeing him made your lips tremble and fresh tears fall out. “Shh… You’re okay.” He wraps you in his arms, plastic bag rustling, his hand smooths your hair down and the other rubs your back as you cry out your frustrations for the day.

The two of you stay there for what seems like a long time. You hiccupping into his chest and trying to calm down. At some point he moves the both of you on the bed and lets you curl up against him. When you finally ease up, he pulls away slightly to look at your face, then brushes away the wetness still lingering on your cheeks. “Feel better?” He whispers, as if being too loud will break you again.

You smile a little and nod at how gentle he was being. He smiles back and leans in to press a kiss on your forehead. “You’re doing great, Y/N. Whatever it is, just talk to me when you’re ready,” and it hits you so hard how much he’s willing to just be there with you, even though he doesn’t know what’s happening. How he wasn’t going to judge you for what you say or what you do and your face crumples and grimaces into a face that tells him you’re trying not to cry. “D-Did I say something wrong?” He’s a little startled, but you laugh a little through small droplets of tears that you wipe away by yourself. “No, you idiot. I’m just happy you’re here,”

He sighs and relaxes, taking his own hand and pinching your cheek, pulling at it a little. “Who’s the idiot? Crying and laughing at the same time?” He was joking, of course. He’d only do so when he knew you could take it. You swat his hand away with a slight glare, and he knows that he’s got a little bit of the normal you back. “Alright, come on, here,” He suddenly sits up and presents the plastic bag that he’s been holding all that time.

“Ice-cream, your favourite flavour,” rummages into it and takes out a tub the size of two fists, a little damp from the melted moisture. He’s got spoons in there too. Slowly, as you eat the tub together, you tell him about what’s been going on in uni. How people just expected you to help when you could. How you got nothing in return. How you try really hard and they somehow still end up piling on negativity into your life.

“…It’s okay to help, Y/N,” he thoughtfully says, mouth muffled cause his spoon was still in his mouth. “But don’t forget to take care of yourself too,” then he scoops another bite. “…But even if you don’t…it’s okay,” he looks up at the ceiling. “If you don’t take care of yourself…Then I’ll do it. That’ll be my job. Forever,”

You lay your head on his shoulder as he says this, still eating from your spoon “I love you,”. He smiles and presses a soft kiss atop your head. “Love you too. I’m always just a phone call away, babe,”

Zhongli

“Is there something on your mind? You’ve been quiet for the past hour,” Nothing slips by Zhongli. He’s observant. He knows you don’t feel like eating by the way you’re picking at your food. Knows that you don’t want to talk because you don’t even meet his eyes.

“…Nothing, really,” You just didn’t have the energy to talk about it.

He feels as if this date has gone awry, and he didn’t even know where he went wrong. Though, if he had to guess, it wasn’t his fault. You were just in a particularly bad mood. Not that the two of you were anywhere fancy, it was just your usual sit-down restaurant at a mall across the university.

To him, the right thing to do was give you the space you needed. So, after walking you to your room that night, he’d wait till the morning to contact you. Imagine his surprise when none of his calls go through. None of his texts were returned. He was beside himself with worry when suddenly, near the afternoon, he finally gets word from you.

“Sorry Li, I feel a little sick today. Don’t worry though, I’ll be fine in no time,”

You’re bad at lying. Or was he just good at reading you? You tend to have the habit of withdrawing when you’re out of energy. To give too much without any regards to your own state, your own feelings. Sometimes you don’t realize that you had to watch over yourself too.

It’s nearly 8 at night when he knocks at your dorm room. Zhongli went through a few steps to make sure your roommate would be out tonight. It was from them that he found out you hadn’t left the room at all today, but that you weren’t sick.

“Oh… Zhongli,” You’re surprised at the amount of things he’s holding. There’s a plastic bag that seems to nearly be popping and in his other hand was a mysterious paper bag. Under his arm he’s tucked his laptop with him. He lived in the dorms too, and if someone saw him now, it would look as if he was moving into your room. “You could’ve just asked me to come over to yours,” his eyes trail away, a certain brown-headed roommate pops up in his mind.

“No, Tartaglia’s in tonight,” You make a sound of understanding. His roommate was rather…special. Too energetic for your tastes, and sometimes nosy. “What do you have there?” You ask and invite him in. He chucks the plastic bag on your bed, lays down the laptop on your table along with the mystery paper bag. He notes that you’re already in your sleepwear, which was perfect. He starts to take out a throw blanket from the plastic bag and a hoodie.

“…This..is?” You’re a little baffled by what he’s trying to convey. “…My throw blanket that you like so much…and you said you like wearing my hoodie,” then he points at the laptop. “Do you want to watch a movie in bed? I have popcorn too,”

Then you realize that he’s trying to make you feel better. He’s figured out that you weren’t really sick, possibly just mentally drained. You smile at him and lean in for a hug, to which he responds to by wrapping his arms around your back and whispering. “…I’m not…really good at these things… Tartaglia said it might make you feel better…” You chuckle in his embrace and could imagine the kind of conversation they had.

“You’re the best Zhongli,” he secretly smiles while rubbing your back up and down. He doesn’t ask questions as to why you’ve been acting the way you do, but you’re the one who offers him the answer. “It’s just school… Too many things have been piling up… My class they… They’re really nice people you know? But just… there are times where I wish they would stop asking me for help, but it feels so selfish of me… I have my own things too, but they never think about that…”

It’s always about them, you want to say, but keep your mouth shut. He runs his hand through your hair gently, internalizing the things that you’ve said. “…I see… Would you like to hear what I think?” He’d ask first, because he knew sometimes that you didn’t really want an answer. You just wanted to be listened to. You nod against his chest, you could feel his heart beating from the closeness. “I think, you’re a very selfless person, Y/N,” he places a kiss on your head. “There’s nothing wrong in wanting to take a break from time to time, you deserve it,” and he guides you over to your bed, wrapping the two of you up in his throw blanket. Laptop on, popcorn in the mystery paper bag as you put his hoodie on. It smells just like him.

His back leans against the wall and you’re in the safety of his arms. You’re practically in his lap, encased in his scent and warmth. He’d managed to prop his laptop up on a pile of books and the two of you watch a random movie on the screen. You were paying attention to it, but you couldn’t help but be more interested in the way his chest rises and falls. You can feel him against you, and the comfort it brings is like no other.

You turn away from the screen and rest your head at the nape of his neck. He looks down, movie still playing and asks “Tired?” You shake your head, eyes closed. “No, I’m just enjoying this…” There’s a small rumble from his chest as he lets out a small “Mm,” his eyes are glued to your face. Movie forgotten.

“…Y/N, I’ll always… be next to you,” Your eyes flutter open a little to look up at him, curious. “…Always?” He nods his head firmly to confirm, and you lean up a little to press a sweet and quick kiss on his lips. “Even when I’m not my best and I’m moody?” He chuckles at that and responds with a remark that might have slightly brought tears to your eyes.

“Especially when you’re not at your best, I’ll be there. Just call,”

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