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mrsabednadir · 1 year

Text

Naked and Famous, Pt.1

A/N: HEYOOOOOO it's been a while. This has been my go-to sleep scenario for my beautiful little buttercup Charlie Kelly. Hope you enjoy

WC: 799

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4:30 PM

On a Saturday

Philadelphia, PA.

What the hell is a “Naked and Famous?!”

The guy sitting on the stool across from me just stares expectantly, though kindly. Pretty sure he can tell I’m very, very new to this. And, of course, there’s no one else tending bar.

Dennis and Mac are engrossed in a vicious game of pool: Mac had desperately tried to convince him to play for clothes, though thankfully, they settled on bragging rights. I know better than to interrupt their time together. Charlie’s probably huffing God-knows-what in the back office. Poor thing. Dee and Frank are out, either looking for a mark or bleeding one dry. I think I heard the words “flammable,” “that yellow tape they put up at crime scenes,” and “orphans.” – Good luck, kids.

“You son of a bitch!” Dennis shouts over Mac’s carefree karate victory dance.

Christ. Do these people remember that this is an actual business? With customers?

Oh shit. The customer.

“I'm gonna be real with you. I have no idea what that is, but let me go check on the computer in the back,” I offer, shooing away his insisting that just a beer would suffice. “Gimme one sec.”

Maybe I’ve only been working for half an hour, but I deserve a break, anyways. I walk to the PRIVATE door, past the pile of dirty glasses I knew I’d have to clean because no one else would, and the on-taps dripping pitifully, begging me to change their kegs.

One, two, three knocks on the door earns me a haggard “Who’s there?”

“It’s me,” I respond, thankful that Charlie hasn’t passed out yet.

Several seconds pass before I hear anything. Maybe I shouldn’t have come to the still-conscious conclusion so quickly. Just as I’m about to knock again –

“Come on in,” he drawls, with all the effort made to unsuccessfully hide his slurred speech.

As I enter the small room, walls painted a nauseating two-toned egg yolk yellow and throw-up green, I pull up a chair next to Charlie at the desk. He smiles, excitedly yet weakly, as I walk in.

Scruffy, simple, and sweet. Just how I like them. Honestly, if he cleaned himself up, I’d jump his bones.

“ ‘Sup?” he asks, hands neatly folded in his lap.

“ ‘Sup to you. You look sick, Charlie.”

“W..what do you mean? I feel…fine.” His eyes are struggling to stay focused and open. There’s an open can of paint thinner at his side, its sides violently dented from attempts to squeeze out that last bit of escape.

“I mean that you’re super sweaty, and you look super pale and shit. Are you sure you’re alright, dude?”

“Never better,” he grins. It looks genuine, thankfully. “Whatcha need?”

“Customer came in asking for a ‘Naked and Famous’ – what the hell is that, right? – so I’m gonna borrow the computer to search it up,” I explain, pulling the keyboard closer to me and leaning over him slightly to look at the monitor. Maybe I’m a bit too close for comfort, but I hope he’s picking up what I’m putting down.

“Oh, cool,” he replies. Then – “Wait, wait, wait!”

4,300,000 results for “GANGBANG.”

Oh fuck.

Ohhhhh fuck.

Neither of us say anything, but both of us understand.

A loading sign finally finishes its job, slow and laborious, thanks to the bar’s lack of its own WiFi and Frank’s solution to siphon it from the place next door – as he once explained, “it’s a free country, bitch.”

A pretty lady appears on the screen, and she looks very pleased.

Well, at least he muted it.

I try to say something, anything. “I, uh….Jesus. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to…intrude. Um, I’m gonna go. Yep, gotta go, gotta go,” I blurt as I rush for the sweet escape of literally-anywhere-else-but-here. The whole time, Charlie’s gotten waaaayyyyy paler and much more silent. I slam the door shut and pause for a few moments to regain my composure, like I didn’t just see my boss in the middle of getting his rocks off.

As I make my way back to the already-unsettled customer, a scream erupts from the back office. Damn, that kid’s got pipes – birds scattering, Earth and wine glass shattering. Really, if I wasn’t an active participant in this, it would be funny. Mac and Dennis look up – both of them now have their shirts popped off – then to me. The deer-in-headlights look across my face is enough for them, I guess, as they reluctantly shrug their shirts on (leaving them unbuttoned) and enter the office.

Before the customer can ask any questions, I fill a glass with whatever – it’ll get him drunk all the same – and hand it to him, shakily. A little bit spills out, but we both couldn’t care less.

He nods in appreciation, and in understanding. At least someone here gets me.

#iasip #charlie kelly #always sunny #dennis reynolds #iasip mac #charlie kelly x reader #charlie kelly fic #WHAT TAGS AM I SUPPOSED TO USE WTF #birdiewrites

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arazialotis · 3 years

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Long Distance

Pairing: Dean × Reader

Word Count: Around 1700

Summary: Dean and Y/N have been separated during the holidays due to a string of hunts but Dean has a thought to make the distance seem not so far apart.

Warnings: Language, General SPN spooky stuff

This is purely just for writing and wasting my time as hobby. Maybe some of you will enjoy it too. I apologize in advance for any mistakes or grammatical/spelling errors. I appreciate any feedback or suggestions!

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Nights came early this time of year, each day growing darker a little earlier. It was hard to fight off the fatigue that crept in every passing moment. Even harder so with Dean out of town on another string of hunts. You sat in the picture window curled up in a fuzzy blanket with a warm cup of tea and a new book. Though you had a corner lamp turned on, the Christmas lights outside bounced off the white snow, illuminating the world and keeping the dark at bay.

Your phone had occasionally been buzzing as Dean updated you on his progress in a new town. You did what you could to not worry, to have faith, but each day he was gone you needed distractions to keep your mind off it. And of course, communication. The longer he went without an update, the more your stomach turned.

Though you were entranced with the novel, methodically flipping pages and on the edge of your seat, as soon as the phone sounded, you threw the book down only focusing on him.

You answered with a pant of excitement. “Hey babe.”

Dean’s smile practically shined through the receiver. “Evenin’ Y/N. Man it's good to hear your voice.”

“Yours too.” You echoed setting your tea down on the ledge as you started pacing the floor. “How’s the first day been?”

“Ah, you know, just getting settled and the feel for things. Wish I had your mind here to sort things out but this has been a long stretch, it’s starting to drag. It was good for you to stay home.” He paused waiting for a reply. “This’ll be the last one, promise.”

“Don’t say that.” You chided knowing fully well he easily broke these promises. “You are doing good work. If you need to keep going, that’s alright. Just promise me you’ll come home eventually.” “You know there’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”

“And besides.” You sighed. “I’m still here virtually, put me together the case details tonight and I’ll scour over them.”

Dean’s blush heated up the air around you as he shamefully admitted. “I already sent them to Sam.”

“Ugh! What? God Da…” Dean’s chuckle cut you off. You rubbed your brow reminding yourself it wasn’t a competition. “I want to help too.” You whined.

“Okay, okay.” His voice faded. “I’m sending them now.”

You looked at your phone waiting for the email to come through. A few moments passed and it eventually did. He had sent over a few news articles, pdfs, and a word doc of his own notes.

“Hmmm… it’s definitely a werewolf.” You teased. “Shut up.” He rolled his eyes. “I’m not stupid enough to get stumped by an oversized rabid poodle.”

“I’ll shoot you some real ideas by tomorrow at the latest.”

“Don’t feel rushed, I got some pretty good leads to follow up on tomorrow.” He assured. “Alright, enough work talk. What about you? How was Thanksgiving?”

“I mean, it wasn’t the same without you and everyone else. But uh, I still tried to make the most of it. Brussels, beans, wild rice, potatoes…” You listed. “Mashed?” Dean interrupted.

“Pfft. Of course. Cranberries. Oh, I did a cornish hen cause like, what the fuck am I going to do with a whole turkey? I already have enough leftovers to last me ‘til Christmas. Tell me you had something more than deli meat turkey.”

“Don’t worry about me babe.” He lightly chuckled. “Denny’s got me covered.”

“Dean.” You scolded.

“Pie? Please tell me you had pie.” He begged.

“No way I’m having pie without you.”

“But.. But… Thanksgiving.” Dean pouted.

You giggled at his adorable antics. “There’s one waiting in the freezer for when you get back.” “Yes! Cherry?” He pleaded.

“Of course…” You giggled together until a knock sounded at the door. “Hey, hold on a sec.”

“What is it?” Dean’s voice grew concerned. He heard the door open, a soft thank you, and the door closing before a bit of rustling. “Oh, nothing.” You fiddled with the box and the phone. “Just looks like a package for you.” Dean licked his lips with anticipation. “Why don’t you go ahead and open it for me?” You wrinkled your nose, unsure if you wanted to. “Really?”

“I’m sure.”

You grabbed a kitchen knife to hack away at the tape. Dean sat down on the motel bed anxiously waiting for you to find what was inside.��

“It’s um… it’s.” You pulled it out further inspecting it. “It’s a lamp?”

Dean grinned ear to ear waiting for you to figure it out. “A long distance lamp? What?” “I found it online. You have one and I have one.” He explained. “I felt bad the last hunt with the bad reception. My lamp will light up when you touch it and vice versa.”

“What?” You squealed.

“Yeah. It’s an early Christmas gift.” Your heart melted. “Go plug it in.” He ordered before you could respond.

“Dean…” His thoughtfulness nearly brought you to tears. “Go!” He repeated before you got too sappy.

After a few minutes of him guiding you through the set up, you were ready to test it out. “Okay, ready?” He asked, his hand hovering over the lamp on his end.

“Yes.” You sat on the floor staring at the dark lamp. “Nothings happening.” You sighed. “Oh, wait!” It was dim at first but slowly turned into a green glow reminding you of his eyes. “Oh my gosh.”

“Your turn.” You pressed the top of yours sending him a warm purple glow. You could hear his smile over the phone.

“See, now we can talk to each other even without the phones.”

“Dean. This is… it’s… thank you.” Was all you could muster to say. “I’ll keep it by my bed so I can say good night and good morning.” “Me too sweetheart.” Dean agreed. “And in case anything happens to my phone or I get stuck in another dead area, you’ll know not to worry.”

The two of you spent another good hour talking; tentatively setting up holiday plans, explaining the unexpected twist in your book, and thrilling him with all the juicy details of exactly what you were going to do to him when he finally did make it home. You read a few more pages before finally calling it a night. Tucked into a bundle of blankets, you reached to your nightstand sending him a final thought of the night. A few moments later came the dim green glow. Though it was just a light, it made you feel as though he was there, his arms wrapped around you making your heart warm.

When Dean awoke the next morning, the lamp next to him was already glowing purple. He smiled, typical that you would be the first to rise. After a yawn and deep stretch, he sent the thought back to you before going to freshen up and shower. The hot water and steam soothed his sore muscles and the tension he held in his shoulders if only for a brief minute. Towel wrapped around his waist and clean shaven, he came back out to get dressed in a suit for the day only to find the light had not faded. With another chuckle he assumed you must have been on the same schedule and sent another touch back before heading out for the day.

From the morning, he was in a sprint; talking with the local police department, interviewing witnesses, consoling family members. Dutifully, he kept you updated on his progress hoping to hear back from you soon on any thoughts yet you were quiet. He wondered if he had mixed up your work schedule again. Having gone nonstop throughout the day, he opted for an early dinner back at the hotel room.

Entering back to the room with his Chinese takeout, he immediately noticed the lamp was still on. He set down his food on the table and pulled out his phone.

‘The lamp doesn’t need to fully replace the phones.’ He texted you, adding a little laughing emoji hoping you wouldn’t be offended by him calling out your silence today.

He popped open his laptop and dug into the Mongolian beef hoping to review any ideas you had come up with. But you hadn’t emailed him like you said. It was still early enough in the day, and especially if you had worked, maybe hadn’t had time to get around to it. He pulled up Sam’s email instead, reviewing notes and potential leads.

An hour had passed and the light still glowed purple. Thinking it must be broken, Dean meandered over to the plug resetting it. The only other explanation would be your hand on top of it consistently which didn’t make any sense. The lamp powered back up and momentarily was dark before the purple hue came through again.

“This is weird.” Dean muttered to himself.

He walked back over to the table and grabbed his phone and dialed your number. After two rings, it answered.

Dean chuckled, thankful to finally have gotten you. “Either these things are malfunctioning or you must really miss me.” He heard a deep breath from the other side of the line.

“Y/N?” His voice dropped. “Sweetheart, are you there?” A sinister voice crackled on the other end. “It’s been a long time Dean.”

Dean’s heart dropped to his stomach. Panic and anger rose to his chest. It was a voice he could never forget. “Alastair.”

“Now I was hoping to find you home when I stopped by but this pretty little lady said you were out on business.” Alastair's voice delightfully slithered.

His jaw clenched. “If you’ve touched a single hair on her head, I swear to God…” Dean spat.

Amusement rose into laughter. “What makes you assume I could harm such a delicate creature. Her neck as easy to snap as a sparrow's."

“You better pray that's not what I find when I get back.” Dean threatened already furiously packing his bag.

“Its not her I want, it’s you.” Alastair clarified. “But I guess that all depends on how long you take getting back home Dean. I might become bored.”

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TAGS:

Forevers: @mogaruke @deanwinchesterforpromqueen @jotink78@blushingdean @sup3r-pott3r-lock3d @dancingalone21@carryonmyswansong @atc74 @superapplepie @cassieraider@adaliamalfoy @iwriteaboutdean @spnbaby-67@monkeymcpoopoo @adoptdontshoppets @maddiepants@onceuponathreetwoone @thisismysecrethappyplace

Dean x Reader: @akshi8278 @boxywrites @its-not-a-tulpa @tacklesackles @aubreystilinski @iamabeautifulperson18@jerkbitchidjitassbutt @spn-dean-and-sam-winchester @ria132love

#supernatural #dean winchester #spn #spnfandom #spn fanfiction #dean x reader #dean x you #dean x y/n

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butterflydreaming-writes-fic · 4 years

Text

“And the One Time They Did”

“And the One Time They Did“ by Looks-Clear (that’s me, yo!)

Word Count: about 3,400 Rating: Gen

@sweetness47, here is my gift to you for the Profound Bond Discord gift exchange! I hope you actually find it amusing. This is a “five times plus one time” fic, and since that’s such a well-used trope, I thought it would be funny to title each of the sections with an AO3 tag.

-o-

1. “that trope where it's a relationship told from an outsider's point of view”

The money is good, but the competition for gigs means that you take that delivery order even though it’s to a house way outside of town. Houses are good, though. Around here, that means honeymoon tourists and vacation renters, which might mean a better tip. “J. Page” is waiting for his order from Great Greens, so you pick up the bags from Yolanda’s new salad cafe and head out in your Jeep onto the river road.

The house is secluded on the less popular side of the river, off the narrow road that splits from the main. You don’t even see the black Chevy Impala parked along the side of the house until you’ve driven to the end of the tree-lined driveway. The two-story house is the kind of place you would love to live in if you wanted a lot of privacy. It’s well cared for to attract the short-term renters your town gets all summer. The house has a good roof, freshly painted siding, and healthy potted plants around the door you’re knocking on.

An upstairs window slides open with a thunk. Taking a step away from the door, you look up.

“Oh, hey.” The man leaning out the window has a smile that immediately puts you at ease. The frame catches at his flannel shirt, exposing a flash of skin above his faded jeans. He’s tall, with long hair, and the breadth of his shoulders make you glad you took the delivery job. “Would you mind… there’s a kitchen door at the back of the house. I’ll be down in a sec.” He pulls back in before you can respond.

You hesitate, thinking about the seclusion of the house and potential danger, but your gut tells you it’s OK. Nothing about the house or the classic car gives you that red flag feeling. The sun isn’t down yet. Plus, your holding an order of salads and cheesy rolls, Yolanda knows you’re delivering them and to where, and you can’t imagine it’s the dinner order of a creeper.

Things are a little unexpected when you get to the back door, though. The tall man — and he really is tall, six-four you guess — is pulling the curtain away from the window beside the kitchen door, but the door remains closed. “I have your Great Greens,” you say, lifting your two hands. You glance at the receipt and tell him the total. The food was paid with a credit card. You’re starting to despair about your tip, the line left blank to fill in.

“Great! Thanks. We really appreciate it,” he says, from the other side of the window glass.

There’s a dog door in the house door. The man disappears from the window and the door flap lift up. An envelope flips out. The man appears at the window again.

“If you could, um, put the order through the flap?” he asks.

“You don’t want to open the door?” Gingerly, you poke the dog door inward and push the bags through one at a time. The envelope turns out to have a few bills in it, a nice cash tip. You straighten up again and dust your hands off on your jeans after folding the envelope and tucking it into your pocket.

He laughs. It’s a breathy laugh, embarrassed. He ducks his head. “Can’t,” he says. “We’re, uh, sort of under quarantine.”

A surprised “Oh!” comes out of you before you can stop yourself. You wonder who else is with him in the house.

He’s quick to reassure you. “It’s not contagious. We just can’t leave the house yet.” He gives you one of those quick smiles again. The effective is magnified from being eye level and within three feet of him. You're a little glad there’s a window between you for protection.

“Thanks again,” he says.

“No problem,” you answer. With a small wave, you start back around to the front of the house, and your Jeep, only glancing back for a moment. The tall man is turning toward others entering the kitchen.

Before the curtain closes, you glimpse two other adults. You can hear them plainly through the window. A deep voice is at first excited about the meals. But then, suddenly:

“Sonoffabitch! SAM! What is this? Salad? Where’s the real food!?”

Back at your Jeep, just as a precaution, you rub your hands with the lavender scented hand sanitizer you keep in the glove box.

2. “(in my head the reader is a female but i didnt specify ir anywhere so ye)”

It’s Friday and a busy night, but when you see the delivery request come up for that same address, you take it. This time it’s for burgers from Jen’s Magnificent, which is locally famous for the MegaBurger, a four-patty monster with the works. You’re not surprised when the bags are heavy with three megas, fries and onion rings. What else would anyone order from Jen’s? The name on the credit card slip is “S. Denny.” You are wondering if the hot tall guy knows he’s not getting any veggies that aren’t deep fried.

Of course, you can guess what happened, and when it’s a different man at the front picture window asking you to go around to the back of the house, your guess is confirmed. The one with the deep voice is tall too, not as tall and not as lean, but still with nice muscle structure and also in a flannel shirt. Brothers, probably. You can see some familial resemblance.

As with the first delivery, you meet him at the back window. It’s earlier than last time and still full light out. He’s pretty anxious for the food, bouncing a little on his feet as he waits for you to slide the burger bags through the dog door.

You can’t help yourself. “Where’s the other guy?"

"Which?"

You pass the food through, straighten up and assess him. The cute one. Your brother?”

The man is already into one of the burgers. He shoves it in his face — you can’t take a bite out of a mega, you pretty much have to smash it into your mouth — and the moan he produces is, frankly, pornographic. This is a man who loves juicy meat.

You kind of want to leave him alone to it.

“The cute one," he repeats with a snort. He wipes a napkin across his mouth. "Researching,” he answers you, chewing on a mouthful. “This burger is awesome. Have you had these?”

“Actually, yeah. She makes good shakes, too.”

“This is going on my list of best burger towns,” he states. The burger disappears and when his hands are free, he wipes them on a fresh napkin. “You a local?”

You nod. He asks you a few odd questions about the town, a little bit about the history, and some information about how often tourists come through. You end up talking about your Jeep Renegade and auto maintenance, which helpfully gives you some points to go over with Roxy at the garage.

You’re back an hour later with another delivery from Great Greens, a single kale salad. You’re not surprised. The cute one is happy to see you. That's nice.

3. “Spells in general. Just spells and spells and spells”

You’ve come to think of yourself as their personal delivery person, to be honest, and it’s not only because J. Page aka Sam is a bright spot any time day or night. Feeling bold one evening, you scribble your phone number on the receipt and tell Sam, “If you guys need anything like from the grocery store or whatever, just call me. Anytime is fine.”

You’re snuggled on your couch watching Netflix when you actually get a late night call from Sam. He sounds apologetic and, weirdly, a little drunk. “Hi… Hi!” he greets a little breathlessly. “This might be a lot to ask but if you meant it about the help, I… we need someone on the outside to get these things. They’re going to sound strange, but I can’t explain what they’re for. Is that OK?”

“Does it,” you ask, “have to be right now?”

“Please, yes,” he says, words breathed out like an exasperated sigh. “I don’t know if I can take close quarters with these two past another moon cycle.” He clears his throat. “Sorry, uh. It has to be tonight because of the first quarter.” He names off some flowers, and then tells you the last one has to be picked after midnight and before dawn.

You actually have some of the list in your kitchen, dried, though it's not fresh. “The rest I can get, but I don’t know where to find that,” you tell him.

“Come to the house. It’s in the garden.”

And that’s how you end up picking lemon verbena by flashlight, in a hoodie and pajama pants, while Sam watches you from the kitchen window and points out the plants he needs. He’s glossy-eyed in the way of someone who’s had more booze than a few drinks at dinner, and pushing himself to act sober like someone who was drinking for a reason.

When you hand over the jasmine and vervain, he’s sitting on the floor at the other side of the door. You catch the dog flap on the backswing and hold it open. “Is that enough? I can get the other stuff fresh from Dara’s tea store tomorrow.”

He leans down to see you better through the opening and keeps going until he’s lying sideways on the floor. He seems vaguely surprised that the world has gone horizontal. “This is what I need to get started,” he pronounces carefully. He seems to consider getting upright. Instead, he rolls over onto his back. His hair, long and silky, flops beside his head, except for an errant lock that lays across his forehead. His beard is growing in, and the mountain man thing really works for him. He looks like he might nod off right there, lying on the floor.

“So… what are you doing, casting a love spell or something?”

He groans. “Those idiots activated one. I’m trying to…” he lifts a hand and makes a serpentine gesture in the air with his finger, “wiggle open a loophole. So we can leave. And Dean can stop punching holes in the walls looking for hex bags.” He wakes up more fully and sits up suddenly. Running a hand through his hair, he laughs. There’s a tint of panic to it.

You can see that he’s about to dissemble about what he said, so you cut him off with a change of topic. “I knew the lady that used to live here. When I was a kid, we called it the witch’s house. She had, uh, twenty cats.”

“This is a dog door,” he points out.

“I know, right?” You smirk. “Do you like dogs?”

“I do,” he says without elaboration. “Can you tell me anything else about this house? Past owners?”

He’s sobering up. You answer with a shrug. “I mean. It’s a rental now. As you know, obviously.”

“A lot of strangers come through town? Have you noticed anyone that stands out? People you know, acting out of character? Has anyone been sick with an unexplainable illness?”

“We get summer tourists, mostly.”

“Anyone weird?”

“We are the weirdos, mister.” You ease the door flap closed. “I’ll bring the rest of your list when you guys order dinner tomorrow,” you say. It’s late, and you need to go home.

4. “Destiel are lowkey pining in the background”

Mylene adds in a cellophane bag of shortbread with the pie order. The scents in the bakery make you wish you were taking pie home for yourself, but no, this French Apple, ordered by “John Paul Jones,” is heading to the house you’ve been delivering to all week. On the nights when you don’t have an order, they order pizza delivery, it turns out. Pia, who owns Ristorante Raduno, mentioned it when you were fulfilling your craving for her incredible lasagna. Piggybacking on the pie order is a double side of bacon that you pick up from Dee's diner.

You honk when you pull up to the house, knock at the front door, then walk to the back yard per the usual. The Impala has enough dust on it to dull the black finish, and that strikes you as evidence that they really aren’t leaving the house. It was clear when you where conversing with him that burger guy loves his “Baby”. He wouldn’t let that car languish, getting covered in tree leaves and windblown dirt.

“You must be Mr. Jones,” you say to the new face at the kitchen window. “Are there any more of you in there or is three your crowd?”

“You’ve met the other two,” he says. He doesn’t exactly smile, but his eyes are kind, deep blue and full of unspoken thoughts. He has a voice like someone after a night of loud singing and drinking. It doesn’t match his appearance. Not with the suit ensemble including the trench coat he is inexplicably wearing indoors.

“I guess pie and bacon is your thing?” you ask, covering a laugh, and pop the bakery box through the dog door. He takes the box once it has passed the threshold. "Whatever makes you happy." You hear his “thank you” before the dog door swings closed.

“The pie is for —” he catches himself. “Sandy.” He was about to say a name that started with D, you’re sure of it. Dean, you recall, from Sam’s slip up. “He likes pie. And bacon.” He stares at the pie as if it is about to impart hidden wisdom. "It makes him happy."

Your tip was included when the bakery was paid, so you don’t have a reason to linger, but you do anyway, curious. “This lockdown is hitting him hard, isn’t it? Not being able to take his car out for a drive?”

He gives a helpless little micro-shrug, but concern shows on his face. You think you see some guilt there, too. What had Sam said about it, that “those idiots” had activated the spell?

“Look, I know it’s none of my business, but…” you hesitate, just for a minute. “Pie is good and all, and that pie is really good, but words are good, too?” His piercing attention actually makes you take a step back. You break eye contact, kicking the brick paving at your feet with the toe of your shoe. “Saying your feelings instead of, um, eating them?” You’ve probably blown it, so you scram without a backward look.

5. “Pray for Sam”

You glare at your phone until you wake up enough to recognize the text as Sam’s. Then you stare at it, trying to make sense of what it says. Meet him? The coffee hut he’s talking about is at the edge of town. It’s the one thing open at this time of day, since Tena is one of those disgusting morning people.

When you get there, you see that Sam is one of those disgusting morning people, too. His hair may have been tied back during his run, but now it’s loose. The sweaty and wild thing works for him even better than the mountain man look. He’s shaved the beard. You hop out of the Jeep and stroll up to where he is doing some stretches. He straightens up and shakes the hair out of his face.

“You’re out of quarantine,” you say.

He answers your smile with his own. His eyebrows go up when he smiles. “You helped. With those herbs you picked, and everything else. I wanted to say thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” you formally reply. “I notice you got out of that house as early as possible this morning.”

When he rolls his eyes, you have your confirmation. “Ha ha, yeah,” he answers. “Gotta, you know, have some space. From the lovebirds,” he adds with a sound that is part relief and part exasperation.

“Are you getting coffee?”

“I’m picking some up to take back,” he says. “No rush on that.”

“Tena makes a mean superfood smoothie.” You gesture at the espresso hut. “Would you like to get smoothies, go sit by the river, and watch the ducks? Until you’re ready to head back to the house?”

6. “If you think this has a happy ending... you're right well done you”

You figure, that’s it, good-bye, they’re gone, the three that were trapped by the spell on the house. Either Sam figured out how to loosen the spell long enough for them to exit, or burger guy and pie guy hooked up and completed the spell’s requirement. You couldn’t exactly talk about it with Sam, while you sat by the water and drank your breakfast smoothies. You’re pretty sure that he knows you were giving them hints, really vague hints but still hints, but it’s not like you could ask if he knows, even now that the spell is broken.

They’re not gone yet, as you find out when Kitty from the General Store asks you to run a delivery out to the house. You stop by the General Store to pick up the bag. It’s heavy with an assortment of stuff indicating wall repair: sandpaper, drywall patch kits, a paint tray and paint roller. They’ve paid with a credit card again, a tip included.

You text Sam to let him know you’re the one bringing their supplies, and ask if they need anything else, which is how you end picking up another pie and a trio of sandwiches. When you get to the house, you see that all the windows and doors are open. Sam is sitting in the Impala with his long legs sprawling out of the open car door. He puts down a book when he sees you get out of your Jeep.

“Let me get that. Must be heavy, sorry,” he says.

“Could be worse. Megaburgers, or cans of paint.”

His hair slides over his ears as he shakes his head. “My brother found paint in the attic, at least.”

“I’m glad this is ending with some DIY, instead of you burning the place down or something,” you say without thinking. “It’s usually newlyweds that stay here. We’re a quiet community.”

He gives you an assessing look.

You hand him the bag from the hardware store. You hand him the food, too, before he steps into the house. You hate to see him go, but watching him walk away? That’s worth the price of admission.

He yells up the stairs that food has arrived. In a minute, the other two guys come down, both suspiciously dusty on their backsides and elbows, both looking stupidly happy. Dean puts his arm around his sweetheart’s waist. Pie guy leans in and blesses Dean with a soft kiss. Pie guy must be Castiel, the angel.

The infamous Winchesters. As hunters go, they don’t seem all that bad.

Like every other kid that grew up in your town, you know how the house spell works. The couples that honeymoon here don’t even notice when they get locked in, and they usually break the spell within minutes with their easy “I love you”s. Castiel and Dean were in love but must not have said the words to each other, yet, when they entered the house, and Sam was caught as a bystander.

You slip away before they catch you watching, get in your Renegade, and head out to the main road. At first, it had seemed like everyone’s bad luck, that some travel blogger had written about the weird little house in an idyllic riverside tourist town, and that particular trio had come to check it out. Your town has been a quiet haven for witches since before you were born.

In the end, it turned out OK. Better than OK. Who doesn’t like a happily ever after?

-o-

#profound bond gift exchange: quarantine & chill #pbgiftexchange #profoundnet #sam winchester/reader #supernatural #destiel #fluff #5+1 things

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glennjaminhow · 6 years

Text

Winter 1993

“What’re you doing over winter break?” Dennis questions, shouldering his expensive as shit backpack because that’s just how Dennis Reynolds rolls. This bag is awesome; that’s why he makes sure it’s visible at all times. It dangles off a form sculpted to perfection by God himself. He only feels slightly self-conscious as douchebags and whores shove past them both. A massive fucking dick accidentally nudges Dennis’ elbow, and Dennis hisses loudly.

“Watch wear you’re goin’, asshole!” Mac shouts. Ever since Dennis broke his arm in three places last week, Mac’s been even more protective of him than usual. “I dunno,” Mac answers, lighting a blunt for the walk home. He stops, cuffing his hands around it so the fierce winter air doesn’t blow it out. Mac takes a puff, head hanging low and staring at the icy ground below.

Mac’s parents don’t really give a shit about him. Dennis knows this. But he’s bored, and he sure as shit doesn’t want to go home right now. Mom and Dad are both there. They got back from Jamaica super fucking early this morning. It was nice not having them home. It was just him, Dee, and whatever maids worked that day. They don’t even know about Dennis crashing his dad’s car into a tree or Dennis’ ridiculous hospital bill or the blue cast encasing his whole arm from fingers and shoulder; he’ll set off security alarms at airports for the rest of his life.

“Well, what’re you doing right now?”

Mac frowns and bites his lower lip. “Um... nothing?”

“Great,” Dennis says. “I’m coming over.

Mac stops him right there. “Why? We’ve never hung out at my place before.”

Dennis shrugs. Mac’s slicked back hair pokes out from under his black beanie. His leather jacket has a new tear right below his left pocket. “Exactly. We always go to my house. You eat my shit and play my games and drink my beer and sleep in my bed, so now I’m gonna do the same thing to you.”

“Whatever, dude. But don’t complain when you see it. Not everyone’s rich as shit like you.”

Dennis rolls his eyes, but he follows Mac regardless. Mac’s house is further from the school than Dennis’, which always leads to super fucking fun walks in the snow, heat, wind, and rain. Usually, Dennis drives him in his own car (which he’s grounded from) or his dad’s car (which he wrecked). Now that Dennis isn’t supposed to drive, and Dee’s threatening to tell Mom and Dad, they walk everywhere they need to go. It isn’t great. In fact, it’s fucking infuriating. But his secret has to stay a secret. Sure, Mom and Dad’ll see his arm, but they don’t need to know about the panic attack or running of the road into a ditch at 60 miles per hour.

They... just don’t need to know.

Mac shrugs off his leather jacket the moment he unlocks the door, hanging it on a hook and toing out of his snowy boots.

“It smells fucking great in here, Mac,” Dennis says while struggling to remove his coat; Mac does it for him. It smells like cinnamon and cloves and fucking Christmas even though there isn’t a tree or any decorations in sight. Huh. Weird.

“Yeah, I guess,” Mac mumbles. “Take off your shoes, bro.”

“I don’t make you do that at my house.”

Mac shrugs. “Tough shit. My house. My rules.”

Dennis does it eventually. He scowls as he kicks them off, not bothering with untying them because he may’ve sort of hurt his ribs in the accident. There’s bruising around his hips and ribcage. It aches, but not as much as watching Mac flea the car with a bloody nose and two black eyes. Not as much as watching Mac almost break down in tears. Mac never cries.

Okay. Stop. Quit thinking about it.

“Jesus, it’s like spotless in here, dude,” Dennis points out, clearing his throat and roaming around the living room like he owns the place. The TV screen has a slight crack in the upper right corner. The walls are coated with thick, messy layers of paint to combat against peeling. “Your mom must be some sorta neat freak.”

“Nope,” Mac replies simply, plopping down on the sofa. Dennis sits until he’s shoulder to shoulder with him. Dennis scratches his neck; this stupid fucking sling itches and hurts his back, and he’s suddenly feeling the three sleepless nights slamming into him all at once. “Den, stop, man. That’s gotta hurt.” Dennis tugs and grumbles and fusses until Mac coaxes his arm free of the horrible contraption. He places a couch pillow between his arm and his stomach for padding.

He doesn’t tell Mac he can do things on his own because it’s nice having Mac take care of him.

“Your dad?” he asks, even though, Jesus Christ, does he already know the answer to that one.

“Can we not talk about my parents? Let’s just, like, play video games or some shit.”

Dennis ignores him. “How can your couch be this fucking clean?” he asks, almost in disbelief, as if his poor friend Mac doesn’t know how to get off his ass and clean a Goddamn couch.

“I like the house to be clean,” Mac says.

“Yeah, me too.”

“But not everyone has maids, Dennis. Some people do all this themselves.”

“Sure, but parents usually play a part in the whole cleanliness routine. What? Your mom still tells you to brush your teeth every morning and night? Daddy reminds you to wash your balls?”

Mac’s cheeks flame red. Dennis almost bites his bottom lip. He’s egging it on on purpose. He doesn’t know why he’s like this, what possesses him to be such a dick, but he can’t take it back once the words escape his lips.

“Shut the fuck up, Dennis, you rich, punkass, piece of shit. My dad’s in jail, okay? He isn’t around anymore. And my mom? My mom works overnight at a gas station just to keep the fucking electricity on. She doesn’t have time to clean and make sure the house isn’t falling apart.”

“Dude, I –”

Mac gets to his feet. He pops his knuckles. “No. I’m tired of this. What kinda fucking friend are you anyway?”

Dennis holds up his one working hand, signaling for Mac to be quiet. Mac frowns and clams up immediately, and Dennis relishes in the power. “I know your dad’s in jail, dipshit. You only mention it a thousand times a day. I know all about your chain-smoking, alcoholic mother too. I was just busting your balls.”

“You don’t know anything about me,” Mac whispers.

Dennis stands up too. “Oh yeah? I don’t know anything about you?”

“You’re always too concerned with yourself.”

“Your full and real name, Mac, is Ronald Herbert McDonald, which, by the way, is still only slightly worse than Mac. Your mom called you Ronnie til you were three; you think that’s when she stopped loving you. You’re allergic to strawberries and swell up like a fucking balloon if you even touch one. You like starfish. You hate The Muppets; they freak you out. Your dad went to jail for the first time when you were five for selling cocaine. You met Charlie in first grade. You met my sister before you met me. You listen to the Red Hot Chili Peppers way too often. You –”

Mac sinks to the clean carpet, resting his back against the couch. Dennis sees the tears swell in his eyes and sees when Mac tries to blink them away.

“I pay attention,” Dennis says. “But I didn’t know you were so... into things being clean. It makes sense, though.”

Mac blinks. “What do you mean?”

Dennis shrugs, settling down on the floor beside Mac. “Your life is shit, dude. You gotta control it somehow. You clean. I smoke. It’s all the same.”

“Can... Can we just not talk about this anymore? You’ve fucked with my head enough for one day?”

Dennis gulps, sucking in a deep breath while nodding. “Sure, dude,” he whispers, and, holy shit, it doesn’t even sound like him. He doesn’t sound like Dennis Reynolds.

“Awesome. Great. Thanks.”

Too far. He went too far. Why does he always have to push buttons like this? It’s fucking revolting. He’s 17, for Christ’s sake. He doesn’t like talking about his parents, about his past, about what happened to him, so why would it be any different for Mac?

They spend the rest of the afternoon at Mac’s house in near silence, watching MTV and lighting up joint after joint while guzzling a case of cheap beer. Dennis sprawls out on the couch, lightheaded and sore, while Mac relaxes in his mom’s threadbare recliner. It’s almost peaceful, but Dennis can feel that tension in the air. He keeps his mouth shut.

“I’m gonna go crash, man,” Mac murmurs at 2:30 AM.

Dennis yawns and nods. He makes no effort to move.

“Sooo can you, like, leave?”

Dennis whines. “It’s really dark out, Mac. I’m tired.”

He hears Mac exhale loudly. “Fine. But you can’t sleep out here. Mom’ll be back around seven.”

Mac guides Dennis to his bedroom. It’s small, but he has a full-sized bed, karate posters on the walls, and an extensive CD collection. There’s a couple of crosses on the walls; Dennis rolls his eyes and sinks into the mattress. There aren’t any sheets, just a comforter. His arm is on fucking fire, pain burrowing deep inside the bone. He closes his eyes and breathes through it.

“Sit up for a sec, Den,” he hears.

It falls on deaf ears until Mac flicks his cheek.

Mac helps him put that stupid fucking sling back on, settling a pillow beneath his elbow. It relieves some of the pressure. Dennis’ eyes are quick to fill with tears.

“I’m sorry, Mac,” he whispers. “About earlier. I’m a fucking dick.”

Mac collapses into bed, clicking the lamp off. Dennis can smell the cinnamon on his breath. Can feel Mac’s bare feet on his shins. Can almost taste the blunt he just smoked. “You are a fucking dick, Den. But you’re my dick.”

Dennis chuckles softly. “I bet I’m an 12 out of 10 down there then.”

“Gross. You’re nasty, man.”

It’s quiet for a few moments. Dennis rolls over until he’s on his left side, not exactly being careful of his barely mended together arm and not exactly caring either. He scoots until their foreheads touch.

“Is this okay?” Dennis asks, voice punctuating this cold December night.

He’s flush against Mac; Mac nods in the darkness.

Maybe Dennis presses his lips against Mac’s.

Maybe Mac doesn’t pull away.

Maybe, just maybe, they hardcore make out until the sun rises.

There’s a spark of electricity, of pure, raw, unaltered energy that Dennis feels for the first time in his life. Fuck, Mac is a great kisser. Like the dude has some killer moves. Dennis cards his fingers through Mac’s gelled hair. Mac bites Dennis’ bottom lip. He doesn’t... He isn’t... Dennis isn’t sure how this is fucking possible. He’s happy? He thinks. He’s still weird with emotions and can’t really feel them, but he thinks he’s feeling them right now?

Dennis tries not to blush when Mac plants several kisses in his hair.

It’s new. It’s amazing. It’s nearly indescribable.

Mac. It’s Mac.

#macdennis #mac x dennis #mac mcdonald #dennis reynolds #panic attack mention #car accident mention #iasip #it's always sunny #it's alway sunny in philadelphia #fic #fanfiction #kissing gay boys

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survivormetaverse · 3 years

Text

Rites of Passage

Elle: I never met you, here's a joke!Never trust a pirate duck.They have the power to unleash the quackin'.🦆🏴‍☠️

Amy: I wish I got to meet you! You seem so wonderful.

Jodi: Hey Bri, we never got to play together but you destroyed my guy Jared’s perfect game in the first tribal council and I thought that was pretty funny. Cheers!

Elle: I was SO sad when you were voted out 🥲 because I figured we'd swap into the same tribe or make merge and we could work together and talk about Stardew Valley, I also started listening to the Penumbra podcast (which I know you listen to The Magnus Archives, but there's a lot of overlap between the fandoms so I thought maybeeee you had listened to it too) Anyway! It doesn't really matter I just was really sad when you were voted out ❤️Here's a joke ^_^: I asked a French speaking man if he played video games.He answered, "wii".

Amy: I’m sorry I didn’t get to meet you. I loved your intro video and I had heard of you from past games. You seem so cool.

Jodi: Also never got to play with you, but Brayden told me you’re cool so hopefully I’ll meet you some time in a game!

Elle: I just know you from Kyoshi where you voted me out and we didn't really talk that much… so 😅 I hope you had fun in Metaverse?Here's a dad joke: My grandma started walking 5 miles a day when she was 65She’s 91 now! But we have NO idea where she is 🤷🏽‍♀️

Amy: I was so hoping to chat with you again because we barely got the chance in HB. You are wonderful and I hope to one day actually play on the same tribe as you!

Jodi: I heard you were my guy’s ride or die until you weren’t, you won the very first comp of the season so good job, hope to see you around in the community!

Elle: A truly unanimous vote, I never met you, but you dropped this, king 👑✨A joke: There once was a king who was exactly 12 inches tall!Terrible king, but he made a great ruler!📏🤴✨

Amy: The legend! All I know about you is you have some chaotic energy and I love that!

Jodi: The truly unanimous vote of the season....we really wanted to give you your first W but you literally just did not show up even for your vote out. I still wonder to this day if you’ve found out you got voted out yet. Nevertheless, nice saying hi to you a couple times!

Elle: You were super nice and I'm sad that you were voted out as soon as you were 💔 we should've talked more when we were on the same tribe.You know every time I see a Jennifer Aniston movie, it seems like she's playing the same person.I guess she's a victim of Rachel profiling.

Amy: Girl I wish I got to know you better because once you came back online after the tribe swap you were so sweet. I really enjoyed your presence and I think the game could have been very different had we worked together. Wishing you all the best.

Jodi: I’m glad I got your vengeance :) Sorry you didn’t last longer in the game! Bye mittens

Elle: I don't know you, but here's a dad joke:Yesterday I spotted an albino dalmatian.It was the least I could do for him🖌

Amy: Oh Danny how I wish it would have worked out with us two! You were so fun and I loved working with you but I’ll never forget sitting on call for an hour when you ghosted our challenge. I’m sorry it ended like that, but I hope we get to play again together because I adore your vibe!

Jodi: All my Fools paragraphs are going to involve Jared since that’s the only relation I have with you all, but Danny I heard you’re my guy’s other ride or die and he told you about his idol. I grilled him when he told me about it at the merge because damn you were connected. You would’ve told everyone (but everybody knew already lol) hope to see you around!

Elle: Ginnyyyyy 💔 I'm sorry I didn't really want to vote you out but I wasn't trying to ruffle any feathers that early into merge, I truly did believe you when you said you were done being chaotic. Your lipsync TikToks are very fun🎶A joke for you: What do you call a singing computer?A Dell! 🎤🎶

Amy: I’m so sorry girl. I didn’t want to see you go, but it was decided. I enjoyed playing this game together through all of premerge and making it through the cursed Fools tribe with you and sitting in that hour challenge call just vibing. I hope we can chat more in the future. I am wishing you all the best because you deserve great things.

Jodi: Girl, you were my first comp partner and I wish we got closer and could play together more. I really thought you were super connected with other Stings players and that’s why I had to boot you before the Jury phase, because I wasn’t sure I could get close enough with you to work together. Regardless, you were fun to have on Phantom and I hope we can cross paths again!

Elle: My Libra rising sibling ♎️✨ I wish we got to work together more in this game, without that ‘no items’ twist round you definitely would've made it far. Thank you for talking astrology with me, giving Colin your items which ended up helping my game too, and just the existence of Neptune 🥰 big Brookyln 99 "I've only known [Neptune] for a day but if anything happened to him I would kill everyone in this room and then myself" vibes.Le joke: My partner just broke up with me. They're sick and tired of my constant zodiac puns.It Taurus apart, I'm in Pisces writing this.(a second one): Why did the nurse carry a red pen?In case she needed to draw blood!💉

Amy: Dennis 😭😭😭!!! I am so so sorry you were voted out that way. There were whispers the previous round too and I was able to squash that, but for your round it was decided before I could act and I saw Colin being villainized for sticking up for you. I am so, so sorry for how things went. I so wish we would have stayed closer in this game because we could have done great things together! I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for our conversations before you went because without them I would not have flipped to protect Colin. You were our guardian angel. Thank you for giving Colin your gifts and still trusting me to confide in me. I hope we can play in another game together because I wanted to work with you from Day 1! You are incredible and I wish you all the good vibes in the world!

Jodi: Dennis, you truly were the one to watch this season, because your reads and intuition were amazing. That’s why I aligned with you, because I like working with other thinkers. I’m really sorry that I voted you out that round, because I knew that if I were to strike, I could not miss with you. I rightfully knew that you had something really good, in not just 1, but 2 idols. After going for 15.5 hours on that Hunt, I knew that the only person that could’ve beaten me was you. You pushed me to be a better player and you definitely made it a very tough hill for me to climb to get to this point. I’m not sure if you gave me your vote this time, and I understand if you didn’t, but I adore your love for the game and I hope that next time we can align and blaze through some games. I give you props for figuring out my game so early on and you were the one that kept me on my toes and pushed me to play harder. I have lots of respect for you as a person and a player of this game, I hope we can be friends after this.

Elle: From our first real interaction I knew you should be someone I'd work with. Unfortunately, I didn't end up reaching out really until it was a bit too late 😅 And we kinda ended up on opposing ends… whoops!I still think we could get along really well! ☺️ We're both creative and funny (though my humor is more an… acquired taste 😂 dad jokes aren't for everyone, I suppose) and have a lot of the same pop culture references from that one challenge lol.I hope your first ORG experience was still a good one, though 💖. Maybe I'll get to ally with you in the future?Un joke: Whenever my artistic partner is sad, I let them draw on my body,It's always good to have a shoulder to crayon.🖍✨

Amy: Babs! I don’t know how many times I wrote to other contestants and my host chat “I just want to be friends with Babs!” I wish we could have chatted more because I absolutely adore your energy. I had the best times on call listening to you. And like you said, great minds think alike. Our double tie was so fun! Hope to chat more soon!

Jodi: Babs, I truly adore you and you were the light of the tribe. I understand that your vote out seemed like a big betrayal, but I truly did not want you to go there. Colin and Elle both played things and everyone else was immune. I had to pick between you and Jared and I just could not vote out Jared due to our relationship. I hope you can forgive me on a personal level after this and we can talk because a lot of my joy in this game came from you.

Elle: Well, this turned out better than Kyoshi did between us 😅 so at least there's that. It was fun being allies for a sec, and here's hoping neither of us gets swap screwed in the future 😂.Your joke: I have a friend who writes songs about sewing machines.He's a Singer songwriter, or sew it seams.

Amy: Brayden! Omg Brayden first I am so sorry I gave you that fake idol. I didn’t know it was going to you; I only knew it was going to second place. When Raffy told me it was you I was like omfg I accidentally gave a fake idol to one of my closest allies 🤦‍♀️. I want to see your creative challenge submission bc I think you probably deserved the win over me. Brayden, you were incredible in this game and I kept trying to see if you wanted to flip with me with some hints haha but you were closer with Jodi. Congratulations on graduating and on being Anastasia’s best friend! I loved getting to know you and working with you. I’m so sorry it ended the way it did. Hopefully I’ll see you in another game or mini! You’ll do great things!

Jodi: Brayden, I severely underestimated you in this game, even though I knew that you were going to be incredible since you’ve played before. When we met up at the merge, I was so grateful to have you be somebody I could bounce ideas off of. Anastasia and I said this later in the game, but you two and me and Jared should’ve come and done a 4-person alliance and rip through the late game. You were such a loyal ally and I really hope we get to play again some time.

Elle: You have a very rational and sort of quietly analyzing mind that I noticed almost immediately and knew that I'd want you on my side, not only because I'd love to be allies with someone like that, but because I knew as an enemy you could easily be a death sentence.I appreciated your love for Survivor and lived in fear of a super idol since the first moment you mentioned their existence 😂. I really wish corn tribe could've made it to FTC 🌽💔, Ohioans for life! (I'm kidding I'm getting out of this state as soon as possible, but it was fun to bond over Ohio with you!)An edited! joke (see that was a slight joke right there… okay I'll see myself out): Did you hear about the guy trying out for editor for the sums series of Math Magazine?It was an addition edition audition.

Amy: JAY! My Disney buddy!!! So I didn’t know Raffy and Jay Bee were going to expose me in that all or nothing tribal for being at Disney lol I was trying to keep it on the DL. Otherwise I would have freaked out more with you over WDW and your trip and my upcoming trip the next week haha!!! We have to catch up after this! I adore you and our chats. I hope you don’t have to sleep on any more chairs and you are having a great summer at work! Love your positive energy. You are on your way to big things!

Jodi: Jay, I have so much to say to you both about the game and about you as a person. As an ally, you were so loyal to me even when people were not nice to you about it, and you stood up for me and always had my back. You played your role in the game to perfection and people are mad about it just because you were never actually on the bottom. I’m sorry I had to vote you out because they made me force my hand. I love you to death and I am so glad we got to play this game together. Having this opportunity showed us that we can absolutely do this again and I will be your goat next time we play together. I promise.

Elle: Colin 🥺🥺🥺💗 When I say I literally almost gave up on this game when you left (Amy can testify). We were a little devious team and it was so much funnn, Amy was the double agent super spy, you were the person on comms with all the connections and gadgets, and I was the nerd in the van planning out the heist routes and typing really fast until I look up really dramatically and say, "I'm in".Also here's the list of book reccs you asked for✨:

The Truly Devious series by Maureen Johnson, it’s a mysteryyyy and it's a lot of fun! A fun little cast of characters to get attached to ^_^

The Importance of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde, I mentioned this one before, it's a classic but you can read it in one sitting And it's funny. We love to see it💕 Plus it's pride month and we love Victorian era gay poet/playwright/authors.

Red, White & Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston, Look. This book is amazing, it is queer🏳️‍🌈 (mlm protag relationship but also way more queer characters), it is well written, it's romantic as hell, it's spicy, I don't know how to describe how good it is I'm getting emo thinking about it read ittttttt 💖 (Casey McQuiston also has a new book out with a wlw relationship and we also love to see thattt✨)

I'll Give You the Sun by Jandy Nelson. Okay soooo this isn't a mystery, but I feel like people into mystery novels would enjoy the way the plot unravels. Also I love this book. That is all ^_^ Also it is queer as well🏳️‍🌈, mlm relationship.

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larsson. Haven't read it, but from what I know about it and what books you said you were into and it's acclaim/reputation, I think you'd be into it.

Generally speaking, I am more in the YA/romance/fantasy side of things but I tried to tailor the list to things I genuinely think you'd enjoy ❤️A joke ^_^: Everyone tried so hard to figure out why Mr. Edwards changed his name to Mr. EvansBut after all these years, it's still a Mr. E

Amy: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭!!!! I won’t even lie here before writing this I spent 20 minutes crying thinking about seeing you at FTC because I am just so sorry. I wanted to sit next to you as you won and I feel like I let you down. I am so sorry for how that round went. I was MAD mad after. When you said you, me, Elle F3 I was all in and when I lost you I made it my mission to get both Elle and myself to the end in your honor. I also regret not grabbing drinks with you in KC because that would have been absolutely hilarious even if our planned tribe fight didn’t pan out hahaha. I loved every second of working with you in this wild game. Your social game is incredible and I am so thankful to you for doing everything you did. I’ll never forget sitting on a 20 minute call with Brayden and Jodi about voting you out, hanging up, and immediately calling you to plan how to keep you safe. Sorry I didn’t tell you about the tricks up my sleeve, too. Thank you for making this game so fun to play that I ignored my family in Disney World. All my love ❤️

Jodi: Colin, I wasn’t quite sure what direction to go with this, but I’ll just be open and honest. I really did want to play this game with you, but after realizing the true threat of you having all of Dennis’ stuff (which was correct), I had to get rid of you not because I didn’t want to play, but just because I wanted my game in my own hands, and with 3 immune advantages, you were able to cruise from F7 to F4 with no risk. Sort of like James in China, you have to blindside them before they cruise to F4. That’s one less guaranteed spot for everybody, and I didn’t want to rely on whether you liked me enough to keep me around. For the same reasons that you were upset with Jared and Jay, I too, did not want to play somebody else’s game. I wanted to put my game in my own hands and that’s what I did. You were not supposed to go at F7, we were just trying to get rid of your idol. I was hoping you’d appreciate the gameplay that I was not willing to rely on riding coattails and be in someone else’s good graces to keep me around. Hopefully I’ve explained this well enough during FTC as well. I had no ill will, just wanted to play my own game, not somebody else’s. For the record, if I didn’t make it back into the game or got voted out again with you at the end, I was going to vote for you to win. You pushed me to play harder and be a better player because I knew you would not be easy to outwit and outplay. I’ve told many people this and I can respect and appreciate being outplayed.

Elle: Joshhhh, my buddy 💔 I'm really sorry you got rocked out, Amy and I were willing to take the risk of being rocked out but we didn't tell you because you had voted for Colin the round previous. To be clear we were still willing to work with you, but the wound was kind of fresh and it seemed silly to give you sensitive information at the time. You did get past F8 this time! But I am sorry about going to rocks, didn't mean to lose you, king.A bit of humor: What does a panda use to make pancakes?A pan...duhI had multiple cooking themed onessss:A student baked a loaf of bread for home economics class.At the end of the class, his teacher returned the loaf and told him that he had gotten an A.The student said: “Thanks, that’s just what I kneaded.”

Amy: Josh I am so sorry you went out on rocks. I know that is the last way you wanted to go. You probably won’t forgive me but I really didn’t want you to go there. I was aiming for Jodi or Jared, but had already mentally prepared for rocks before the twist was announced. I truly hope you get to play again and not be victim to a twist or rocks. You are an absolutely incredible player which made me cautious and frustrated at times haha! Love your energy and I am manifesting that you get a new job that you absolutely love because you deserve it!

Jodi: We had such an incredible story arc to our games. We weren’t close on Phantom, got in touch on SEES, then grew apart again before my vote out, pulled off a beautiful move at F7, and continued to work together until you got rocked out at 6. You were the surprise blessing to my game. When you approached me at F7, I found light in my game again. You had the same agenda as I did, with the same intentions and same concerns. You gave me a real chance to reintegrate into this game and I’m so happy and grateful that you decided to trust me. On top of that, your energy and personality was super fun and I’m glad we got to have fun writing each other’s names down a couple times. I treasured your trust in me a lot and I really wanted to play to the end with you. I think you’d win the game if you were in my spot today. I hope we continue to be friends and good luck with your new game.

Elle: Thank you for remembering my birthday before Raffy reminded everyone 💛 that was very sweet and in my introduction I literally said if anyone remembered it I'd love them forever and then I proceeded to be on opposing sides with you… oops!

Granted, it wasn't really on purpose, I just happened to not be in that alliance of six people and that happened to kind of decide how lines were drawn for the rest of the game in a way.

Impressed with your sudoku skills, being on a tribal call during graduation (congrats again!), and with your coolheadness, if I had an idol while that chaos one was played you bet I'd be playing it 😂 you had a really good game and I hope you think so too ^_^

A fitting joke: If you keep trying the same sudoku puzzle, you willl eventually solve it.

It's just a numbers game, really.

Amy: Jared! You unintentionally became one of my biggest rivals because you are so good at this game! I envy your way to lie in such a believable way that I had to spend so much time convincing Colin you were lying even though I was copy/pasting your exact plan haha! You are great at challenges and frustrated me to no end when you would ONLY tell me lies. You are so smart and I can’t wait to see what you do next. For the cards that were dealt to you, you had an incredible game. Congratulations on graduating! I hope to see you in another game and actually get to work with you.

Jodi: Dear my beloved idol holder, thank you for being my in-game simp. Thank you for having your idol on deck at all times to use on me at my request :) Jared, by now I would’ve shared with everyone at FTC about our 10 year love affair, but I want you to know just how much playing this game has meant to me. After drifting apart for a good 7 years, I’m glad that Survivor brought us close again last year and that you signed up to do this. I couldn’t have played the game that I ended up playing without you despite you WANTING ME OUT AT F4. I’m glad we did this game before signing up for the show together. I cannot wait to do Blood Vs. Water 3 with you. Basing off of our track record this time, we’re going to kill it :)

Elle: Anastasiaaaaaaaaaa💔 I'm not sure how much left I have to say to you 😅 (I am writing this kinda right after tribal so I was talking to you like an hour ago). Congrats on graduating again!! And congrats on this game kinda jealous of your streak so far 😂 you've literally never done worse than F4 do you know how many people can say that? Not many!! Definitely not me lol.

Here's a dad joke!: How do you handle a redhead's temper?

Gingerly!

Amy: Anastasia you are absolutely incredible and I am so thankful Ginny put us in an alliance together on new Fools because I loved playing this game with you. We went back and forth on working together but every time I was glad we were both still together making it farther in the game. I truly meant when I said I would force fire for you, but I respect your decision. I am so sorry I had to keep things from you so much since you were closer with Brayden and Jodi. I hope to play another game with you because you make it so fun and you are such a great player and your social game is so good! I was so excited when you wanted to flip but I am sorry I couldn’t say yet that I already had. Congratulations on graduating and being absolutely incredible!

Jodi: Anastasia, you are the reason I got to the end, and I owe so much to you. In this game, I’ve had to play so dangerously, and my game heavily relied on having ride or dies have my back. When I came back in, we talked immediately about me throwing out your name and you writing my name down, but we got together instantly and made magic happen. You had my back and I had yours. We pulled the most iconic move in this game at the final 7 together (by now you’ll all have heard me talk about it, my plan to create immunity for 3 people) and I truly had you as my ride or die to the end. Thank you so much for playing with me, believing in me and recognizing the game that I played. I love you and can’t wait to be best friends with you and Brayden

#rites of passage #ritesofpassage #rop

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auburnfamilynews · 5 years

Link

The game of the century is over and the results couldn’t have been more monumental, considering the pre-game hyperbole concerning who would be chosen for the College Football Playoff in the collective editorials last week. The general consensus was how a one-loss LSU team’s resume should still include them in the selection process.

Only that’s not what happened.

Now the uproar among the various pundits is that Alabama with one loss is looking in from the outside, with the one-loss Georgia being included as the forth best team by the College Football Playoff selection committee presumably as per strength of schedule. Of course, this is conveniently forgetting the fact that the one loss by Georgia was to an un-ranked South Carolina team currently with a losing record and that Alabama lost a game by less than a touchdown to the #1 ranked team.

But relax, Southeastern Conference fans, the season isn’t over yet. No playoff slots will be earned until at least the second week in December, and there is a critical month left before the conference championships and plenty of tough games are ahead for all teams. While you can say that there is little chance of LSU being tripped up with its three remaining games against the bottom half of the SEC West division, there are several other highly competitive games for the remaining one-loss teams that could significantly impact where they will all play in December and January. This story isn’t over by a long shot.

Many have been quick to point to a sea-change in both reputations and impact within the league in the aftermath of this week’s games. The rise of Florida, LSU and even Tennessee (forgetting the early season, evidently) and of course the fall of Chad Morris and the re-initiation of a coaching search for the Razorbacks have all be discussed. But it’s important to remember that reputations are rarely made on a single game. LSU’s rise has been electric, and I would be remiss if I didn’t pay tribute to the fact that a good coach made sound staff changes and is now reaping the benefits of that decision.

But if the be-all end-all of a newly earned ‘top team’ were made in a couple of 60-minute contests, then 2013 would have placed Gus Malzahn well out of reach of possible turmoil, fan disapproval or questioning of his plans, coaching staff or players in the following years. It’s nice that LSU has that shiny new offense, but don’t think for a moment that Ed Orgeron will become as well-respected, appraised and appreciated by the LSU faithful beyond the immediate winning cycle. Let that team take a unfortunate turn and all that good will and euphoria will scatter with the wind.

It has happened before. Just ask the head coach of the Kansas Jayhawks.

The passing of name and reputation? Not so fast, son.

SEC West Offense

Both Alabama and LSU proved entirely potent on offense this last weekend. LSU prevailed, but despite the first half miscues, Alabama proved it still had surprising punch late in the game in Tuscaloosa. But LSU’s performance was nothing less than perfection as they shredded the Alabama secondary the likes of which have not been seen in a long time, least of all within the confines of Bryant-Denny stadium.

Auburn and Texas A&M’s numbers are steadily improving, don’t expect them to be able to sustain those level through their last three games the Aggies have South Carolina at home, but face Alabama and LSU on the road. Auburn plays at home, but faces two of the best defenses in Georgia and Alabama.

SEC West Defense

Alabama’s defensive numbers tell the story of the Joe Burrow’s effect on teams. LSU’s offensive and defensive numbers reflect pretty much what they’ve done in every game this year. But Alabama’s defense was playing their first ranked team on their schedule, and displayed several weaknesses that had been overlooked and obscured by their dynamic offense. This doesn’t mean the Bama defense is bad, but just not to the level that many fans have grown accustomed to. Expect this to play out in both of their remaining conference games.

Auburn’s defense will be challenged this weekend against Georgia, but it is evident now that the season closes that this is the most capable defense in the SEC West, if not the conference in general. Both scheme and talent are deep and well coached and scoring on the Tigers in the Red Zone remains the most challenging task in the Southeastern Conference. We’ll see if that is still the case after this weekend, as the most capable offense of the East come calling to Jordan-Hare Stadium.

SEC East Offense

Defeating Missouri last weekend solved only one problem for Georgia, as it reduced the field of contenders by only one. Despite the loss to Georgia, Florida is still in the race with two conference games to go for both teams. It’s a long shot, but stranger things have happened before. Georgia still has to get by Auburn on the road and hosts Texas A&M at home only a week later. Both of those teams present the challenge of excellent defenses coupled with good but not great offenses, much like Florida and South Carolina posed earlier in the season. A couple of timely miscues and this Georgia team might be missing out on a trip to Atlanta.

Florida can definitely win out as I doubt they’ll find much difficulty in their remaining games. However, Missouri is winless on the road and undefeated at home this year – and the Gators travel to this weekend’s game. That could be interesting as well.

The rest of the division is concentrating on trying for bowl eligibility and the most surprising result is that left-for-dead Tennessee might just pull it off,… unless they face plant again. I’m not betting either way.

SEC East Defense

The story this weekend is going to be Georgia’s defense against the Tigers attack. Barring turnovers and big plays, how the Dawg defense performs will likely be the difference in this game and the next for Georgia. Missouri gets to show if that defense is real in the face of the Gators coming to town this weekend.

Not much can be said for the rest of the division. The hope for Kentucky is they are able to survive long enough to win two more games down the stretch, with that Anchor Clanker defense in the way this weekend. Lose that game and they’ll have to win against an equally desperate Louisville team in the same boat – holding on to just five wins and a chance to save the season for a bowl bid.

State of the Conference

With the passing of the torch this weekend, LSU takes top billing away from Alabama and becomes the target for every other team in the College Football Playoff mix. Even the game in Atlanta isn’t likely to phase this team as they’ve already dominated just about everyone they’ve played. The only surprise this last weekend was how late Alabama stayed in the game through lucky big plays and special teams.

When was the last time anyone has stated that about Alabama?

In any case, a one loss Alabama has an outside chance of getting in the CFP, but not a two-loss Tide. Nor will a three (or four) loss SEC East team get in after becoming road kill in Atlanta if Bengals sweep the conference. As much as the hope is there for late season chaos and Auburn getting in on strength of schedule and answered prayers in the Amen Corner, I doubt if a two-loss SEC team will make the cut over the other conference’s best teams.

At that point the elephant in the room is not Big Al, but the collective records at the bottom half of the Southeastern Conference, now sitting at 25-43(!!) with sixteen games remaining to be played among those same seven teams that are averaging worse than six losses apiece. This can still get ugly when it comes bowl season and during the height of recruiting. I still say we’ve crept awfully close to the cliff face that drops down to the deep chasm of irrelevancy currently occupied by the ACC and PAC-12.

That more than Alabama losing at home to LSU is what is by far the most compelling story of the 2019 season for me.

The Tigers are now at home? Bring em on!

The post Tiger-Eye Review – Quick Draw Edition appeared first on Track 'Em Tigers, Auburn's oldest and most read independent blog.

from Track 'Em Tigers, Auburn's oldest and most read independent blog http://trackemtigers.com/tiger-eye-review-quick-draw-edition/

#IFTTT #Blogger #auburn #auburn fast #wareagle #AuburnFamilyNews #war eagle #sec #football news #aubu

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sctsunai-archived · 6 years

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duskshipping.

THANK GOD I AM SUCH DUSKSHIPPING TRASH

who hogs the duvet

Yuuri. Constantly, all the time, there’s no other state of being. Yuuri is a filthy fucking blanket hog but Dennis just puts up with it.

who texts/rings to check how their day is going

Dennis, every day. He checks up on Yuuri occasionally and Yuuri almost never replies but Dennis is happy just to see the ‘read’ receipt. Yuuri sometimes bothers Dennis incessantly if he’s bored or lonely, I don’t give a fuck about your responsibilities, come home right now and cuddle me

who’s the most creative when it comes to gifts

Dennis, obviously, he’s fun and creative and imaginative. Yuuri buys Dennis a gift once but the lady at the store takes him to the jewelry case because he’s clueless.

So he gets Dennis a little silver charm bracelet and the charms are like a playing card and a magic wand and a star.

Dennis thinks it’s adorable and wears it every day and he shows it off and eventually like Shun or somebody is like “he got you jewelry was he shopping for a girl???”

Yuuri gets so intensely embarrassed about it like it’s not his fault people didn’t teach gift buying at Academia the damn store lady said it was a good idea! And he fails to live down the teasing ever and never gets Dennis another present either.

who gets up first in the morning

to everyone’s surprise, Yuuri.

Yuuri’s got shit to do and plants to tend and he’s used to the early morning soldier schedule.

but god help you if you ever wake him from a nap.

who suggests new things in bed

both of them and they’re so unabashedly dirty they’ll try almost anything once that Yuuri doesn’t veto.

Dennis will try anything.

Dennis is adventurous and Yuuri can’t even comprehend the shit he finds on the internet.

who cries at movies

Dennis. He cries his eyes out and Yuuri just.

“I can’t fucking take you anywhere, stop, hold still, oh goD CLEAN YOUR FACE, DON’T TOUCH ME”

who gives unprompted massages

Dennis. Dennis is tactile, he loves touching Yuuri and Yuuri melts at his massages? It doesn’t matter where or when, Yuuri will never protest and Dennis gets his touching time.

who fusses over the other when they’re sick

They both fuss over each other in different ways.

Dennis spoils the shit out of Yuuri. Hot presses, cold presses, the tv set at the right volume, extra pillows, medicine taken on the spot for the next dose, homemade soup and blackout curtains.

Yuuri ignores Dennis is sick until he gets bad and then he awkwardly tries to copy how Dennis takes care of him and it’s awkward and uncomfortable. Dennis takes a nap and wakes up to Yuuri having turned their room into like some apothecary nightmare, there’s herbs and plants everywhere and Yuuri is putting some weird paste on his chest but he’s too sick to deal with it.

( Yuuri is smug when his stuff works better than medicine ever did, take that )

who gets jealous easiest

Look at Yuuri and tell me “jealous” isn’t a word that describes him.

Dennis cannot even hang out around Yuuya without Yuuri getting puffy and jealous about it.

who has the most embarrassing taste in music

Yuuri likes instrumental music and that’s it.

Dennis likes everything and that’s horrifying.

Yuuri has broken no less than six stereos and two of Dennis’s phones when Dennis has played shitty American music that he can’t even understand ( because he was never taught English) like Crazy Frog and Fergalicious.

who collects something unusual

I don’t think either of them collect normal things that most people would collect.

Yuuri collects poisonous plants and carnivorous plants and any animal bones he finds, what the fuck?

Dennis collects like every shitty kiddie magic set ever. He’s got like 192 decks of cards and top hats that wouldn’t even fit on his head.

who takes the longest to get ready

Dennis’s hair always looks like a mess and that’s because sometimes he forgoes brushing it because what’s the point?

Yuuri takes 9 hours.

He takes longer than any woman on a tv show, and god forbid he see something out of place in the mirror by the door as they’re leaving, like Yuuri I have a brush in the car, Yuuri no, we don’t have time for this, YUURI

who is the most tidy and organised

Yuuri likes cleanliness and order and organization and it’s also funny because he hates to clean. He hates it. So he will bitch at Dennis if he finds boxers on the floor, there’s a hamper right there you HEATHEN, because Yuuri will only clean when he has to.

who gets most excited about the holidays

Yuuri regrets his life choices spending his first Christmas with Dennis. They live together, it’s nice, but Halloween was tolerable for the aesthetic but Christmas is a devil’s holiday where Yuuri’s concerned.

Dennis wears a different ugly Christmas sweater each day, there’s no repeats and so you will not see them out in public together at all in December.

who is the big spoon/little spoon

Yuuri is a weird person who says “don’t touch me” but likes cuddling. Dennis is precariously the big spoon because he is A, bigger and B, not trapped in Yuuri’s arms where he could potentially lose his life if he angers his boyfriend.

who gets most competitive when playing games and/or sports

Yuuri can also be described as the word “competitive.”

Dennis is also not one for letting his pride be mocked.

Shun mocks them both constantly and Yuuri is so full of vinegar that it gets out of hand.

who starts the most arguments

For two emotionally stunted, broken, abused people with wildly differing personalities, they fight very little.

Yuuri is always the one who starts it. Every time, without fail.

They fight mostly when Dennis is worn out and can’t take Yuuri’s sharp tongue anymore. Sometimes a guy needs a break and yelling at Yuuri is the only way to get it.

And yet, somehow, Dennis always apologizes with hot tea.

who suggests that they buy a pet

Dennis and Yuuri says “no” before the question is ever finished being asked.

Yuuri hates pets, hates animals, get them away from him.

Dennis wants a pet anyway but he knows better than to suggest a dog, one drop of saliva on Yuuri and the dog would be gone.

So Dennis goes to the shelter with Yuuya and Yuugo to look at cats and finds this sleek cat who explicitly hates Yuugo for no reason at all.

Yuuri accepts that cat and only that cat for that very reason.

what couple traditions they have

There are no traditions here other than cuddling and reading books.

Yuuri also attends every magic show of Dennis’s without fail no matter how much he hates the noise and crowds. Dennis, on the other hand, helps in Yuuri’s garden the next day and gets bit by at least two plants every time.

what tv shows they watch together

They don’t, let’s be real.

what other couple they hang out with

There are so few people who can tolerate Yuuri or Dennis and there are virtually no people who can tolerate Yuuri and Dennis.

Yuuya and whoever he’s dating end up being the victim of double dates.

Yuuri hates them.

how they spend time together as a couple

Cuddling. A lot of cuddling. And messing around.

who made the first move

Dennis. By accident, actually. When they were kids at Academia, Dennis put on an entertaining duel that Yuuri spied on from the shadows. Dennis told Trapeze Magician to give one of their audience members a gift.

Trapeze gave Yuuri a rose even though he was out of sight and he popped his head out for just a sec with the rose.

Dennis broke into this big, goofy, missing-two-teeth smile and Yuuri was gone, what happened, he does not understand.

who brings flowers home

Why bring flowers home when one of them grows them?

Dennis. Dennis does.

Yuuri hates it, stop killing flowers you asshole, it’s not a romantic gesture.

who is the best cook

Dennis only because Yuuri emulates his ace card so well.

Yuuri is always hungry, all the time and he doesn’t gain any weight.

No one figures out how.

When Yuuri cooks, he takes the whole “taste your cooking” thing to heart and by the time he’s tasted it multiple times, it’s half gone.

Dennis is tired of being hungry because of this and now he cooks all the meals and makes a snack for Yuuri to eat while he cooks so he doesn’t eat their meal again.

#❛ anonymous. ❜#❛ asks. ❜#❛ what a shame we all became such fragile broken things. ❜ ⁽ᵈᵉᶰᶰᶦˢ ˣ ʸᵘᵘʳᶦ⁾#❛ shut the fuck up zayne. ❜ ⁽ᵒᵒᶜ⁾#long post cw

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katiezstorey93 · 7 years

Text

The Reason Gold & Silver Have Frustrated Investors Since 2011

“The marketplace WARNING LIGHTS are no more working, so when the CRASH occurs, it will be a total surprise.”

Not to anyone that reads this site

I’m making over $14k a month working part time. I kept hearing people tell me so I chose to look into it, just how much money they can make online. Well, it was accurate and has totally changed my lifestyle. This is precisely what I do,…

It is manipulated; of that I have no uncertainty.

Gold is this Petrodollah’s thermostat; TPTB have a chiller blowing to keep it. What is the baseline? Look in, say, a Au spot price graph.

This is done to create the petrodollah seem stronger than it is.

And we’ve got an Air Force ready and prepared . Or else we would be fighting with each other for scraps of meat at the USA streets within a couple of years.

The spot price doesn’t reflect room termperature.

China is currently colluding.

So it ain’t going anyplace,

The main reason why there are “frustrated” investor is because they THOUGHT that they’d purchase their 3 ounces of gold and it would take to 10k per/ounce and they would go pay money for their new F150.

For people (like me) who do NOT beg for a financial meltdown, and who expect that the “collapse” is deferred as long as possible…the Additional 7 years to prepare has long been greater than welcome, as will be the Upcoming few year…or seven years, if this is the case. Anyone who’s life is denominated in US dollars (i.e. your paycheck, your retirement, your resources, etc.) should NOT be praying for a financial collapse. But, they/we/I should be preparing for it.

Unless the regime is currently causing you to drop behind. Price of living here is pumped up making squirreling away money to invest in prep more and harder. A correction is needed by us that so that older folks can retire youthful members of society can find a foot hold and actually cover home.

Now that is some significant Stress Porn.

We require a correction to ensure youthful members of society can find a foot hold and actually cover home so that older folks can retire.

Fedbucks will likely be worth nothing, but there will still be Yuan and Rubles along with Tenge along with Rials and Lira (Turkic) and cryptos. Unless you happen to develop wheat, however, on a neighborhood scale, even though an ounce of silver is still worth a loaf of bread, then it will be the only way to get it.

Value will have to be redefined, but what exactly? The system was moved into by Canada, but we know just how far away the moon is.

And even if it doesn’t appear, gold and silver will never become useless like GM stock became worthless, you may always hold on to it even if on paper it is worth less than what you purchased it to just don’t purchase more than you are able to afford and only sell when you want and purchase real assets with it. Because all fiat currency has had the same difficulty, or the same design the dollar long since it is a federal reserve note will match or shed value. Funding is slavery, inflation is contested.

Vince Linzi, Steve St Angelo articles; constantly quoting Dennis Gartman. What’s next? Perhaps you can revive Jon Nadler?

What is ZH currently coming into? Endure another step in quality of articles and every iteration of we stalwarts and owners have to suck it up.

I disagree. My calculations indicate that a catastrophic financial event will certainly occur sometime between tomorrow and the second. I have to point out that my calculations have a margin of error of approximately 80 percent. I hope this information proves helpful to the ordinary investor.

There is/are individuals who’ll say “I had not been warned that mockets was so poor. My wealth is gone.”

Then there is the individuals who want a tiny bit longer they will cash out and leave.

I have no clue when the mockets will melt over or down fast time.

My comment will be this 1 sentence too.

Keep in mind that while we’re clammoring, fighting and losing our sanity attempting to accumulate these worthless paper debt components or entries in a database, even the jeuws are occupied accumulating the sole money which exists and that the entire world is saturated with money that is funny. Get a few to you and simply put it away for the time when the newspaper and digits assume their value – nothing whatsoever.

They have all of the money have all of the time to think and plan our passing and that is exactly what they have been doing for hundreds of years.

I said it “was” in a bubble, the identical buttocks pain Gold bugs believe will be sensed by those buy-n-hold lemmings getting prepared to take a huge loss long the S&P and also their ETF.

I pile myself when I have money to do silver.

However chase a market? Nope. It is circulating dollars and about monetray fall. Stop by a jewler you see no money, less gold. A bid is not which makes it very commodity driven that my buddy is the time to purchase, and at which it will fall next marketplace corrrection.

Thus Kocic is the new financial hero? May want to put down the doom narrative for a sec and check the track record of the guy.

We are in the beginning stages of deflation which will make the Great Depression look like a bathroom tub wave vs. the Tsunami that is ready to hit.

Gold will go down to below $300 and probably a low of around $200.

So yes, continue buying gold so I can keep selling it and take your money like the fools you are.

I will be a buyer of gold again as it goes below $300 but not NOW!

Money will be king through this coming melancholy.

This man’s an idiot. He will keep selling the stone that he doesn’t own and can not afford.

“Hey, my name is truthalwayswinsout and I’ve got a bunch of gold to market because the price Will keep falling. I won’t sell it all now but instead as the cost drops, within a Time Period, so I could sell at lower prices than if I purchased it all 40, I will sell it for you. Have I told you that I’m a moron?”

In the end, the power of the printing press will prevail, IF the Fed and all their central bank brethren cannot defeat deflation initially. Because the solution spells doom inflation will be demanded by govts someway . Sovereign bankruptcies throughout the planet will prompt the BIS/IMF monetarists to guarantee the world awash. Their rescue attempts will inevitably result in hyperinflation. imo.

Secondly, in a deflationary environment $300 will probably be difficult to increase today, for investing in PMs as $ 1225. It doesn’t function like many think. Ohhh, $300, that’ll be economical. I will just wait. No, if Au falls into $300/oz. , you will be wishing it was 1225 because you had some form of revenue and a task. With Au priced $800 below typical current production costs, to be renewable, costs (labour, gas, etc) will have fallen dramatically. To allow you to buy at $ 300, otherwise, there will be no Au.

Ultimately, my bet is fundamental banks. In the end, both banks will probably be nationalized or another kind of financial policy will be employed to start. I’d far rather be sitting with a pile of PMs than needing when it was accessible, I’d have purchased after this occurs.

Money is dependent on the cash bigly, US dollar, and complete disaster it’ll fall into 1 Yuan to 100 US.

Metals that are all helpful, metals have a cost of production, mainly.

So copper tin lead zinc, are a much better store of value that is truly an IOU, which a money lender who will flee writes IOU.

The biggest frustration to a lot of valuable metals traders, is the reason why have the gold and silver prices under-performed the marketplace since 2011? Actually, for gold it was because 2012. Its average cost was greater in 2012 compared to $ 1,571 the calendar year, even though gold hit a fresh record high of $ 1,900 in September 2011.

Regardless, the valuable metals analysts ago in 2012 were forecasting the market was going to experience much higher gold and silver prices after QE 3 was announced by the Fed in the end of 2012. However, surprise took the precious metals community since the gold and silver prices were hammered in the end of 2012 and into the beginning of 2013:

In this period of time, the price dropped 30% along with the price that was silver declined nearly 50 percent. Did something change in the markets for investors to abruptly ditch valuable metals? Actually, something really big happened…. . THE MARKETS BROKE. Of course, many from the other media consider the financial market died in 2008, but when we look at a different index… it certainly demonstrates that the markets drastically changed even farther in 2012.

The following charts (below) from the report, , show that the industry is completely under-pricing RISK by orders of magnitude not seen before. But when I say “under-pricing risk”, all this indicates is that the marketplace does not have any idea of the dangers ahead. It’s similar to somebody driving a car that doesn’t realize the engine is burning up and the brakes don’t work because the WARNING LIGHTS are not working. So, the poor slob proceeds to speed down the street, without out a care in the world… until the car blows up or that he heads across a cliff.

In the Deutsche Bank article linked above, analyst Aleksandar Kocic supplying evidence that the WARNING LIGHTS from the marketplace are no longer working:

Regular readers are knowledgeable about this Economic Policy Uncertainty (EPU) indicator that is made by limiting the frequency of articles in ten leading US newspapers which include three of their goal terms: economy, doubt; and even more of Congress, shortage, Federal Reserve, laws, regulation or White House. Their own means and standard deviations of phenomenon then normalizes these amounts and combined in an indicator. As such, EPU is entirely marketplace independent (in the same manner the mechanisms of a coin toss is more relative to any specific bet).

Okay… the description of how this index above may be a little difficult to comprehend, so I will simplify it. The BLUE LINE represents the “Economic Uncertainty Policy” (EPU indicator) exhibited from the frequency of articles in the MainStream networking. The BLACK LINE is the VIX indicator, the volatility indicator (S&P 500). Fundamentally, economic uncertainty printed in articles in the Mainstream Media must correspond with all the volatility index of their markets (the VIX).

And… that is exactly what took place from 1996 to 2011. The black and blue lines transferred down and up in tandem. However something changed. In accordance with Kocic:

Intuitively, when VIX is in tune with EPU, the industry is acknowledging the degree of hazard. When VIX EPU large and is reduced, markets are somewhat complacent — they’re currently underpricing risk.

After 2011, the 2 measures of risk decouple with VIX always low despite growing doubt. The breakdown is structural, and it is visible across all market sectors, not only equities.

What Kocic is saying is that the marketplace has become highly complacent and can be underpricing danger. At the two charts, Kocic chooses the gap between the VIX along with EPU Index to Obtain the second graph in the bottom. As we can see, something changed following 2011, and notably after 2016.

This graph is showing the amount of COMPLACENCY. By 1996 to 2011, the market complacency level fluctuated around the bottom line. After 2011, economy complacency is trended much greater.

According to the post:

This is where matters get much more interesting, because by this step, “it appears that the markets have left a structural change towards greater degrees of complacency in the previous six years.” Here, Kocic reunite into his old, cautious self, warning that this decoupling will lead to tears. This is how he frames it:

Current levels of complacency are more alarming. This is what everybody is talking about. The market volatility will not grow despite growing anxieties and uncertainties. Persistence of reduced volatility reinforces one placement and is raising the penalty for dissent. As a result, the possibility of disorderly loosen is increasing.

Because market volatility is low, shareholders have been brainwashed to think EVERYTHING IS OKAY. Alas, the problem is very dire because the market’s “Warning Lights” have now been turned off.

I decided to consider that graph above and show at what stage the price surfaced:

There’s no denying that the gold price peaked at the same moment the EPU — Economic Policy Uncertainty indicator decoupled from the VIX, shown at the end of 2011. The marketplace was deluded to think that GOLD DOESN’T MATTER anymore. This is shown in VIX indicator, since it continues to trend reduced into the Exact Same level in 2007… until all hell broke lose from the markets:

Again, the EPU Index simply demonstrates just how much “Uncertainty” is currently happening from the markets via articles on the MainStream networking. According Kocic, the EPU Index below, has been since 2016, to:

However, the VIX Index (volatility) is currently at the same level it was in 2007. Which suggests, the Marketplace is completely ignoring ALL THE BAD NEWS coming out of their Mainstream Financial Media. Again, it is exactly like a speeding car heading down the street with a motor prepared to blow off and without the brakes, however, the driver doesn’t know anything is incorrect because the warning lights are not working.

So, for all the frustrated valuable metals investors around who remain to BELLY-ACHE and COMPLAIN that the “Advisors Got It Wrong” regarding gold and silver because 2011… have also been BAMBOOZLED, such as the rest of the current market, which EVERYTHING IS FINE. Well, it is not.

Okay… so, WHEN will COLLAPSE happen?? If I had that answer, it would be able to pick the winning numbers on the lottery ticket. The indicators, such as the ones point out that the problem in the markets have been deteriorated much quicker than before. The Central Banks asset purchases of $1.5 trillion in the first five weeks of 2017, are more than twice the annual tendency since 2011.

The U.S. and Global Oil Industry is being GUTTED from the interior due to the current low oil price. Since , the worldwide oil and gas industry’s total debt is currently closer to $1 trillion versus $1 trillion in 2006. These energy companies have to pay a great deal of INTEREST EXPENSE to support their enormous debt. When the energy industry starts to really disintegrate, then it’ll take down the entire market.

My gut tells me that this will start to occur within the subsequent 6 months. It might happen or it may take. There is no method. Therefore, don’t attempt to. It might be wise to own some real precious metals until the marketplace cracks, or it make be hard to get any…. Or if that’s the case, at substantially higher prices.

For those who continue to get frustrated by the precious metals cost, silver is down another 20 cents as I compose this guide, have a great LOOK at the charts within this report. The marketplace WARNING LIGHTS are no more functioning, so when the CRASH occurs, it will be a complete surprise.

from network 8 http://www.diamondprismcoaching.com/the-reason-gold-silver-have-frustrated-investors-since-2011/

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junker-town · 7 years

Text

More college football coaches who should be governors, because LOL, why not?

Good morning! This is The Read Option, your daily college football newsletter. Sign up for this in your inbox!

CBS Sports' Dennis Dodd reports former Ole Miss, Auburn, Texas Tech, and Cincinnati head coach Tommy Tuberville is considering a run at the Alabama governorship. His qualifications, per Dodd:

“Two words -- Donald Trump,” said Terry Lathan, the chairman of the Alabama Republican Party, when she heard Tuberville was a possibility for the GOP. “See, Nov. 8.”

Tuberville isn’t Donald Trump, but he isn’t coaching either, which makes him available for a run at the state’s highest office. And that availability -- in this day and age -- essentially makes him qualified.

Celebrities, actors, athletes and -- of course -- reality show hosts have already won office seats at state and national levels. Few have experience dipping their toes into the roiling waters of Alabama politics where the conversation starts with one basic question: Who ya pullin’ for?

Another Alabaman’s perception of you depends on the answer: Bama or Auburn.

So you can see why a Tuberville candidacy would be so divisive, uniting, inspiring, perspiring -- anything but boring. For 10 of his 21 years as a head coach, Tubs had his greatest success leading the Tigers to an 85-40 record and an SEC title.

Sure! He's a famous person! Try whatever! We have more coach recommendations while we're at it! Throw more in the comments! Nothing matters!

Let's have Mark Richt see if his churchy wisdom and chill vibes can wrestle control away from Georgia's current authoritarian governor, Kirby Smart!

Les Miles should enter every Midwest state governor's race at once!

Houston Nutt should enter every every state governor's race at once!

Will Steve Spurrier win his native Tennessee just to ban Phil Fulmer?

Is Bob Stoops already Oklahoma's governor at this point?

Bill Snyder, governor of Kansas? No. Governor of Texas.

Nick Saban would ... actually be a good governor for real, probably.

Keep this going with some slightly more reasoned commentary:

Richard Johnson: I am of the opinion that Ed Orgeron could run for governor of Louisiana and win.

He is as Cajun as they come and therefore a true man of many of the people. But he also has a rags-to-riches story, on a winding road to the actual highest position in the state (LSU head football coach). He has an inspiring story about sobriety and personal reinvention. He isn't scared to tussle with the press when necessary (he briefly wanted to fight SB Nation's Steven Godfrey many years ago; years later, the two had a sit-down interview), and he's showed the ability to learn from past organizational mistakes.

Also, at USC he gave all of his subordinates cookies, and a cookie for every citizen is a badass platform.

Alex Kirshner: James Franklin would be an interesting candidate in Pennsylvania. He's the head of the state's biggest program, and if Penn State keeps getting better, his popularity in the middle of the commonwealth should soar. (Joe Paterno once seriously considered making a statewide run for office, but he ultimately stayed on the sidelines.)

But Pennsylvania's a weird state, politically, and it's hard to strike the right balance between appealing to the state's conservative middle and liberal edges. Hall of Fame Steelers receiver Lynn Swann got trounced in the governor's race in 2006, so just being really good at football isn't quite enough. Pennsylvania's also never elected anyone but a white man to be governor or senator. Franklin would have to be a trailblazer.

Steven Godfrey: When Justin Fuente took his first head coaching job at Memphis, he hired against type for a 30-something freshman HC and stocked his staff with ex-head coaches, all whom had expertise in the various aspects of Fuente's job. In short, he knew what he didn’t know and knew well enough to find folks who could help.

That, and the eventual Virginia Tech coach is quiet. He’s not rude, he just has very little to say. What a fantastic trait in an elected leader: saying very little. When I was vetting schools for National Signing Day features, Fuente, through his sports information director, politely declined an access feature, saying, “You’ll probably be bored here.” Then he signed a top-25 class.

Maybe you’re concerned at Fuente’s relative inexperience (because that bothers American voters, I’m told). Just go get West Coast Dad Fuente: Washington's Chris Petersen. You can’t question his resume of creating success using minimal resources. Also, he’s a functional human being.

It used to be that journalists like me would be wary of guys like Petersen or Fuente -- who shun access requests and interviews -- for an elected office. Can’t put my finger on it, but I’d cut that finger off to have an elected leader like that now. Say next to nothing? Do a really good job? What a tremendous concept.

More college football

Steel yourself against the long, warm winter with this list of 25 games to look forward to in 2017.

Today's biggest news: Tom Herman was once fired from Subway for going to town on a thing of pastrami.

Bill C team of the day: Appalachian State, which has a lot in common with those March Madness 12 seeds everyone's terrified of.

Crootin' team of the day: Michigan, which added a four-star local.

Hey, do you want a Bama-Clemson Round 3 rubber match, or nah?

Transfer season's most highly sought non-QB has narrowed his candidates to five.

New Heisman odds, with USC QB Sam Darnold now the favorite.

Seven Bama players you might not've heard of who'll probably be NFL Draft first-rounders at some point, because they're Bama players.

I want to stress to you that Bama's new OC is a man of many facial hair styles.

Folks, here is Nick Saban hanging out with Mark Zuckerberg.

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