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#but weren't willing to actually go look for them and would have rather slapped a different culture on a character who is still
disaster-vampire · 1 year
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why do culturally christian americans think it's okay to rewrite the mythology of cultures that have nothing to do with them to make them fit their ideals
#i see this done SO much to jewish culture both from actual practicing christians and pagans & atheists that were raised christian#like they seem to have that same belief of superiority over judaism and other religions more broadly#like folks appropriating lilith to girlbossify her#or rewriting every single greek myth again to girlbossify or generally give them modern politics & morals#for a while people were also doing it with like. old european fairy tales.#like remember that post that was like what if red riding hood was hijabi? like bro. have you considered maybe looking into actual#traditional muslim stories rather than slapping a muslim character over another culture and calling it a muslim story?#and there were various replies to that post. and these were clearly people with disney brainrot who wanted more diverse stories#but weren't willing to actually go look for them and would have rather slapped a different culture on a character who is still#fundamentally european. like. idk this is a whole thing.#like i kinda feel this way even towards disney's princess & the frog. there was an actual african version of that story. don't get me wrong#i liked it. and i don't have any say on whether or not it's good rep. because i'm not african american#like i like that it's an adaptation put into a different setting and different time period. but there was still already an african version#of the fairy tale. am i making sense#i don't even know if this has a name. idk if it can be classified as cultural appropriation. it's similar?#anyway. i hate this whole phenomenon.
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ozzgin · 9 months
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[Baki Masterlist]
Yandere! Kaiou Retsu x Artist! Reader
You open the door to the Shinshinkai Dojo and greet some of the men in the hall with a nod.
"You're here earlier than usual." One of them comments as you pass by.
"Yeah, the last lecture was cancelled and I had no other plans", you respond with a smile.
"You know it's getting serious when your free time is turned into training time. That's how it was for me!" the man lets out a hearty laugh.
"No way, I'm not made for this." You wave your hand in dismissal. "I'm just going with the flow and seeing where that takes me."
You go on your way, ruminating over the brief exchange. It's been a few months since you began taking karate lessons at the Dojo. You still remember Katsumi's perplexed expression as you stood before him, handing over the sign up papers.
"A-are you sure? The sparring can get quite rough and you're... well... uh..."
"You advertise it as perfect for self defense. Who needs it more, the buff pal over there or this short college student that can't even sketch in the park without being harassed by perverts?"
You slap the papers on the table with a loud thud. The man blushes slightly, realizing the irony.
"I apologize. You're entirely right." He scans over the form. "Evening classes. That's when I teach, actually! Looking forward to seeing you, then."
After the first few weeks of mostly standard workout in order to build stamina, you started learning the basics. Katsumi was greatly surprised and equally impressed by your unexpected skill. Turns out you weren't half bad at this! And so he suggested you show up more often, because he wanted to see how your newly discovered talent would develop in time.
As thankful as you are for his support, you find the whole ordeal rather funny. You don't have any intention of becoming some professional fighter. You're an artist and plan to remain one for the indefinite future. The little karate hobby serves as your dose of healthy activity and as the occasional inspiration, since you particularly enjoy recreating the human body and its intricacies on paper or in clay.
"Oh, (Y/N)!" Katsumi spots you and gestures for you to come over. Your nostalgic daydreaming has been interrupted. "Remember when I said that it helps to expand your knowledge? I have just the person for that." He places a hand on your back and guides you further into one of the main rooms.
"Here she is, Retsu-san. You might not believe it at first, neither did I, but I guarantee you she has a lot of potential."
You bow slightly to the stranger in front of you and he silently returns the gesture. He seems mildly awkward about the encounter.
"I'm sorry, I don't think I follow. What is this about?" you ask, somewhat confused. The deep stare of the long haired man intimidates you, so you avoid it by throwing quick glances at Katsumi instead.
"Would you be interested in learning Chinese Kenpo? This is Kaiou Retsu. He'll be joining us at the Dojo for a while. I thought you could use some variety."
"Shouldn't you be asking him if he's willing to teach rookies like me?" you wonder if this poor man had his services offered against his will.
"It is my great pleasure to spread the knowledge of this ancient art. I only ask that you treat it with respect and don't take it lightly." Retsu straightens his back and looks ahead, in no particular direction.
Ah, how embarrassing. He can't even look at her properly. He wishes he could drag Katsumi out in the hallway and whack some common sense into him. The least he could've done was to let him know who to expect.
Obviously he's seen women before. He's been out of the temple for a long time now. So why is he acting so strange all of a sudden? Katsumi was very secretive about his new favorite student and refused to give him any details besides "you won't regret it". He anticipated anything but this. He's especially baffled at his own reaction meeting (Y/N).
All he can do now is to pray that he isn't so obvious in just how flustered this woman has gotten him. He wonders if Katsumi went through the same nervousness when he first met you. He secretly peeks at the young man and notices how relaxed he seems to be next to you. Yeah, perhaps he just needs a little time. Then he can treat you with the same confidence, too.
***
"What matters the most here is actually the placement of the foot. If it's slightly tilted the wrong way, you lose all support and everything else falls apart. A good kick needs an equally good grounding."
Retsu is in his comfort zone. For a mere moment, he can forget his audience and focus on his technique. This is what he does best. Still concentrated, he unbuttons his shirt and throws it aside, as this is how he usually fights.
"Find the weak point depending on your opponent's stance, and quickly make your move before they've got it figured out."
He demonstrates the attack, followed by a few skillful jumps as he returns to his initial spot. He checks to see if you've been following his instructions, a prideful smile plastered on his face. Your eyes are wide, mouth slightly open in shameless marvel. His smile immediately vanishes and is replaced by an embarrassed frown. Why are you looking at him like that? It's one of the most basic moves he can think of.
You suddenly clap your hands together and lower your head in a begging posture. The way his body bends and folds in such a fluid, continuous way, the way his muscles contract rhythmically in a calculated vigor... This man is not only a master of martial arts, but your newly found muse.
"Please excuse my rudeness, but I really can't think of a better way to put it. Might I be allowed to sketch you during your training? I really wish I could capture your artistry."
You shyly glance up, worried you may have angered the Chinese man. He's covering his face with one hand and you tense up, unsure of how to proceed. Should you apologize? Then you manage to discern the deep blush that's taken over his face.
He must calm down at once. He's inhaling deeply, attempting to regulate his breathing. He can feel the vibration of his heart slamming into his chest at great speed. Truly, how happy your words made him. And this brings him to the abrupt realization that he will never be like Katsumi around you.
It's been a little under a month since he's met you, and the slightest interaction coming from you makes his whole composure collapse into shambles. All the feelings and thoughts are now avalanching over, burying him and making him unable to let a single word out. It could very well be that he's in love with you, but it's a frightful, rabid adoration that trickles out of his grasp, as if it could escape from his control at any moment. It's a terrifying discovery for someone that so values their discipline.
"If it's too troublesome, you can forget about it. I got too excited. To be honest, I've been using you as a reference for some time now, but it felt wrong not to tell you about it."
You crouch down to your backpack and hesitantly pull out a notebook with pages sticking out. You peel open the covers and spread some of the papers onto the ground, for a better view.
Retsu squats down with you and gazes over the detailed pencil works, partly distracted. He'd appreciate your anatomical accuracy if it wasn't for his presently feverish state. He places your hands between his and analyzes them. What a difference. Dainty, fragile and yet powerful enough to win Katsumi's respect. Nonetheless of insignificant size compared to his large, calloused and weathered palms. To think that you've been watching him the same way he's been watching you all this time. Perhaps for somewhat different reasons. How would you react if you knew? What would you think of someone like him?
"Umm..." you swallow dryly as you attempt to break the silence. You can almost hear a faint ringing in your ears.
What if you were to reject his confession? It wouldn't be the first time he's faced defeat. Retsu is however unsure if he'd be willing to accept it this time. He looks at you with newly found resolve. No matter what, he'll do what it takes to become a man worthy of your love. If only he could remain your inspiration forever.
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magentamedicines · 2 years
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Magentamedicines (Pt.12)
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Things had changed for Tori since accepting her job at Freddy Fazbear's Pizzeria.
First, she made her own money rather than using that which she'd been left by her family.
Second, she spent time with Michael again.
Michael, and his boyfriend Jeremy.
Tori liked Jeremy- not in the same way she liked Michael- but they got along.
Jeremy actually laughed at her jokes, and complimented her outfits.
She wasn't really sure when it had settled in, but at some point their references to each other had become Michael's girlfriend and Michael's boyfriend.
They weren't together of course, Jeremy liked Michael, but he didn't need to like her, but they could share.
It made work a lot more fun, Tori and Jeremy could tag team their poor hapless boyfriend until he was a mushy puddle of blush, and laugh at how easy the task was.
Tori didn't admit it often, but she'd missed the relationship she'd left behind in '83, she wouldn't let anything rip it away from her again.
"Ok- Michael! Truth or dare!" The three of them sat on the floor of Tori's living room, looking like children at a slumber party.
"Nice try- truth," Michael said, as if the answer would really save him from any embarrassment.
"Have you ever kissed a frog?" Tori said, speaking as if she already knew the answer. Michael's face went scarlet.
"Wh- you- that's not fair!." Michael shot back, Jeremy stifled a laugh.
"It's a yes or no question love," Tori said.
"I was six," Michael pouted, Jeremy could no longer contain his laughter.
"Ok fine, your turn then- truth or dare." Michael said.
"Dare, I'm not a coward love," Tori said, Michael smirked.
"I dare you to climb up to the roof," Michael said in a self-satisfied voice.
"Oh come on love, as if I didn't practice this for years when we were younger," Tori said, rolling her eyes as she strode over to the living room window, pushing it open and swinging herself out, using the nearby patio as a latch as she made her way up to the roof.
"Shall we continue the game from up here or should I come back inside?" Tori said, leaning back against the roof.
Michael poked his head out of the window, opening his mouth to respond, only for his phone to start to ring.
"Shit- it's father- I- guess I've got to get going," Michael said, his face growing pale. Tori moved to get back inside the house, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and pressing a kiss to his cheek.
"Be safe love," she whispered as she let him go, squeezing his hand before he turned to walk through the door.
"Well I suppose it's just the two of us then," Tori said, leaning back against the couch and casting a glance at Jeremy.
"You've met his dad before right?" Jeremy said, sitting next to her.
"Yeah- more times than I care to remember- and more than I was willing to," Tori said, scratching at the back of her neck.
"Michael won't let me come over to his place so- I've never really met the guy," Jeremy said.
"Count yourself lucky then, that British bastard wouldn't know common courtesy if it walked up and slapped him across the face," Tori said with a snort.
She laughed of course, but something about that man had always unsettled her, even back then. Even beyond the things he'd done and said to her.
"I guess I should get going too then, we've all got shifts tomorrow after all," Jeremy said.
"I'll see you then Jay," Tori said, giving him a two finger salute as he, too, turned to leave.
And she was almost glad he'd left when he did, as she soon felt a familiar panging in the back of her skull.
Tori walked to the bathroom, pressing the backs of her hands under the back of her head, as if trying to push something back up into her brain.
Only after she stood in front of the sink did she remove them to turn the faucet, her eyes hazing over with a familiar cyan hue.
There was a fish swimming a pool of what looked like blood, as the fish swam it seemed to morph, until eventually it resembled more of a mermaid, one with lilac eyes and silver skin. The merfolk rested its head on the shore, bluish black hair spanning out in the water and the ground in front of it. It let out a harsh wail, inky black years streaming down its face.
Tori blinked a few times and shook her head, she'd unpack the situation later- even if it made little to no sense.
The next day at work was an. . . Entertaining one.
If by entertaining you meant highly emotionally distressing.
She half wondered why, exactly, she hadnt been given a vision that morning.
Tori gave Jeremy a light-hearted wave as he passed her to walk into Kids Cove, Michael wasn't there that day, he was working nightshift that night.
Things were quiet for a while, until the silence was broken by the sounds of screaming children in Kids Cove.
They weren't screams of excitement.
Tori vaulted over the Prize Counter, rushing in past the stream of terrified children only for her eyes to land on something terribly familiar.
Her arm itched and burned as she rushed over to Jeremy, placing his bloody head in her lap as she pulled her phone out to call an ambulance.
"I should've been there- god how could I have been so stupid!" Michael sat outside Jeremy's hospital room with his head in his hands, Tori pulling him closer to herself and rubbing circles between his shoulders.
"It's not your fault love, you werent scheduled," she whispered, flinching slightly at the pang in her skull.
She ignored it, until they got home. Jeremy would have to stay overnight for a short while, then Tori would take him in- his parents didn't want to deal with the trouble.
"Michael I- I need to show you something-" she said quietly, taking his hand.
Michael just followed her, the blank expression on his face told her everything she needed to know.
She walked with him to the bathroom, Michael giving her a quizzical look as she sat down in front of the bathtub, turning the knob and letting the water rush down. She took his hand and guided it to the surface of the water as she let her eyes haze over.
The golden retriever lay still on the ground, it's face was mauled beyond recognition. It was still for an uncomfortably long time before its eyes flew open, a yellow-orangish color. The retriever stood, letting loose a low growl, something moved toward it, almost as if floating.
Tori blinked, shaking her head and looking over at Michael.
"Y-you can do magic?" Michael said in disbelief.
"If my vision is correct, I think Jeremy can as well now," Tori said, shrugging.
"Does-" the look in Michael's eyes was enough to fill in the blanks.
"Yes, William knows about it," she said with a sigh.
"Tori. . ."
"Don't pity me about it love, he doesn't scare me, he'll get his karma one day," Tori said, resting her head on Michael's shoulder.
Only two months in, and 1987 was shaping up to be a very interesting year.
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ghoul333 · 3 years
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serial lover
chapter one(?)
pairing: billy x f!reader
wc: 2.8k
summary: billy wants to kill you, but you change his mind last minute.
warnings: angst, murder, swearing, fluff(?)
a/n: i used both their point of views so i hope it came out alright. i definitely want to write another chapter. hope you enjoy! <3
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He looked at you from afar. Lurking in the bushes, watching your every move. It was pretty much turning into a daily routine. He wanted you, bad. Billy was heavily debating when to break in one of these nights to kill you. Lucky for him, tonight might be the night, your parents weren't home and your siblings were nowhere to be seen. Just you, sitting pretty on your bed and staring at the ceiling.
You were the perfect victim. It had been a few years since the first killing spree in Woodsboro. Everything for the most part had gone back to normal. They thought about it for a while, and considering they had succeeded the first time, Billy and Stu decided to give it another go. Only for this job was Billy on his own, Stu being with his girlfriend.
A kind, innocent girl like you? That would be fun. Though you had never wronged the pair, you were somewhat of a loner. Quiet but willing to help when needed. Might've been a distasteful move, but damn was Billy eager to hear what your screams sounded like.
And now that you were alone, it was the perfect time to play a game.
Only you weren't.
Your brother in law, Ian, was in the living room, watching a hockey game.
Billy got into a stance when he saw you getting up from the bed, figuring you would leave the room. Instead, you paced in circles. He looked down at your hands, you were flicking your index finger against your thumb, as if it was out of anxiety. You seemed to be contemplating something.
You looked at yourself in the mirror. Billy having to duck down so you wouldn't spot him. It would be a different story if he was dressed up as himself, you two were acquainted after all, having one or two classes together. But he wasn't exactly 'himself' right now, he was Ghostface. Though he and Ghostface were one in the same, you didn't know that. You would only see a masked psycho hiding in your bushes.
He was about to pick up his cellphone to call your house phone, but something stopped him. His hand was frozen in place. When he looked back to you, he noticed a change in your expression.
You were crying in the mirror.
Billy cocked his head. What the fuck was this? One minute you're fine and seemingly calm. Then the next minute you're crying as if something traumatic happened.
He raised his brows, surprised when you stopped crying immediately, as if on cue. Your eyes had been glossy but were now completely dry.
Holy shit. Where did you learn that? He thought.
You didn't look sad anymore. In fact there was no emotion at all and for some reason, Billy loved it.
You wiped the tears off your face and stared at yourself in the mirror. Taking a deep breath.
Was that believable?  I think so.
A part of you wished you had someone here to let you know, but this was something you needed to do by yourself. You didn't even know if you were gonna go through with it, but the urge wouldn’t leave your mind.
Hearing a loud cheer from the other room, you groaned in disgust. You had a hard time believing your family would leave Ian here with you. Especially after all the shit you've taken from him.
You could confidently say that you hated your brother in law. Your sister disappointed you, putting up with trash like him and you resented your family for tolerating it for as long as they have. For over a year, he had lived in your house. Being nothing but a bum. Always being a fucking asshole to you and your family, then making you feel like shit when you call him out.
He could get away with it too. The fact your father was rarely in town made it easy and you hated it. You hated him. You wanted him gone, for good.
You knew there was only one way. No matter how many fights, he wouldn't leave. Refused to.
If he was gone, everything would be fine. It'd take time for some people to heal, but this was for the best.
Thinking about it put a smile on your face. Even though the inhuman thoughts ashamed you, you couldn't help but let them excite you at the same time. Never in your life had you wanted to do something like this, but you craved to see that piece of shit suffer. This would be the only time, and hopefully you wouldn't get caught.
You opened up your drawer, pulling out some scissors, studying them for a few seconds before putting them back.
You weren't ready to get blood on your hands. You looked around your room, trying to find something easy and simple. You looked down at your rack of shoes. Suddenly, an idea popped into your head.
You pulled the lace from one of your old sneakers, you'd have to dump them afterwards but you wouldn't miss them. While you wrapped the string around both your hands, something came over you. You didn't even realize you were walking to the living room, until you were standing right behind him while he watched his game. At that point, your body was doing the talking. Fuck what was actually right. Fuck morals.
Billy watched all this, following your every move. He cursed himself for not noticing the other obvious person in the house. How stupid. If he decided to pursue you there was a greater chance he wouldn't get away. Stu would've had to come. You kind of saved him there.
Seeing the single shoelace in your grip and standing so close behind Ian, he was actually anticipating your next move. Which surprised him, you had him on the edge of his seat. You had opened his eyes in those last few minutes. You had him so confused.
He had been watching you for days, basically knew your day and night routine. So, where did this come from? You put on an act, even for yourself?
He couldn't deny he thought you were, somewhat, adorable. Many victims had been adorable, but being adorable doesn't mean shit to Billy. If he wanted to gut you, he would.
There were times where you would just sit and stare into a void, but he didn't really think anything of it. He didn't realize how fucked up in the head you really were.
He couldn't kill you now, definitely not. You were turning out to be just as insane as he was. Billy felt drawn to you. He was rooting for you.
You stood there long enough for Ian to notice your presence behind him. Not even turning around, he opened his mouth.
"What the fuck do you wa-" He didn't even get to finish his sentence before you wrapped the shoelace around his neck, attempting to strangle him.
Hearing him speak irritated the fuck out of you. You'd rather cut your own ears off, but why do that? He should just simply stop talking.
He was strong, but you gave yourself props for not wearing socks, your feet were planted firmly on the ground, and they weren't going anywhere. His arms were violently swinging, voice coming out in gargles. How long did I need to do this for? Maybe a plastic bag would've been easier.
It felt like forever until he quit moving. Eventually, his arms fell limp and his breathing stopped. You stood there for a moment, the lace still wrapped around him. Had you killed him?
You decided you wanted to be sure, jerking the shoelace against his neck just one more time.
Suddenly his arm flew up, grabbing the shoelace and trying to jerk your body forward. You begin to struggle against him, pulling the lace as tight as you could so he couldn't grip it, but he was able to overpower you within seconds. Yanking you over the sofa he had been sitting on, you groaned in pain as your back hit the floor. The air being knocked out of you.
Where did that adrenaline come from?
Watching you flip like that, for some reason, worried Billy. Even he thought you had him. He couldn't let this happen, he felt the strong urge to come to your rescue. Sure, some random guy dying by the hands of ghostface didn't fit the route they were trying to take, but Billy was going to protect you tonight. He needed to.
He quickly got up from where he was crouched, beginning to creep his way towards the house. He figured he needed to move fast considering how much smaller you were compared to the man you were trying to murder.
"You little fucking bitch!" Ian managed to seethe, voice extremely hoarse. He got up from where he was standing and grabbed you by the hair, making you cry out pain. Billy heard the commotion from outside, and the sound he'd been wanting to hear. He didn't like it. Why?
Why did it make him angry to hear you in pain?
You wanted to avoid eye contact with Ian, but he yanked your hair again, making you face him. The look in his eyes seemed hungry, and not in a good way.
He gave you a vile smile, before slapping you across the face, making you tumble to the floor once again. You slowly reached up, touching your cheek. A single tear threatened to fall but you quickly blinked it away. It burned, almost vibrating from the impact. You knew the slap was hard enough for blood to come through.
Fuck.
You figured you were screwed, if you knew he was gonna grab you like that you would've just duct taped him to the coach. You really did not think this one through, even though you had been thinking about it for months on end.
You felt his body heat centimeters away from you. Looking up at him, he hovered over you.
"Thank you for finally giving me a reason to do that." He said, his tone spilling venom. "I'm gonna enjoy this."
You just stared at him, you weren't scared or upset. You couldn't even be mad, you just attempted to strangle your sisters husband. What could've been expected? You probably didn't have a great chance of succeeding anyway, but you couldn't fight your urges anymore.
People like him deserved death.
You didn't have time to process another thought before Ian picked you up, throwing you against the wall. You yelped as your side impacted harshly against the wood floor. You didn't even want to look at him anymore, you had failed and were probably gonna die, or get beat into a coma.
You didn't feel him grab you again. You didn't feel him pin you against the wall. You didn't feel the corner of the table next you digging into your side. You didn't feel anything. Not even the tears falling from your eyes.
"Don't cry now darling," He whispered in your ear, you shuddered in disgust. "This is what you wanted."
His voice made you want to vomit. Cigarettes and cheap beer leaking off his tongue. Even with him up to your ear, you could smell it. He was so fucking close. Everything about this man made you sick. You couldn't understand how your sister slept beside this thing at night.
He held your body against his while he shifted his hands. They wrapped around your throat and squeezed, very hard. You couldn't breathe. You wanted to just let it happen but your body was thinking ahead of you, once again. You grabbed his hands, trying to pry him off.
You actually couldn't fucking breathe. You were going to die, staring into this mans lifeless eyes, hearing his heaving breathing...his body pressed against yours. You would rather get stabbed to death. Or burned alive. You just didn't want him to be the last thing you saw before you died. You didn't want to die.
I fucked up.
Maybe you were selfish too. You were better off just hurting yourself to ease the pain. You couldn't get him off you and it was painful. Your vision was starting to blur.
You used your feet to try and push him off you, but your attempts failed.
Unexpectedly, you fell to the floor with a thud. You quickly inhaled a large breath of air, a small coughing spell following. You couldn't hear or see anything in that moment, just trying to get up, desperately trying to regain your strength.
Breathing had never felt so good.
Weak and in pain, you used one hand to guide your way up the wall, while the other one held your throat. As you regained your vision and started to focus on your surroundings, you began to hear struggling. Lots of struggling. You were confused, you thought it was just the both of you. As you looked up, you noticed a cloaked figure on top of  Ian.
Billy had gotten into the house from your laundry room window, finding the entrance a few days ago when he was planning how he would kill you. He crept in, being as quiet as a ghost. When he turned the corner, he saw Ian pressing you deep against the wall. He watched you struggle and fight, a few tears falling from your eyes.
He tackled your brother in law to the floor, making him lose his grip on you. Billy managed to gain the upper hand quickly, getting on top of him and wrapping his hands around his throat. Ian kicked his legs, but it did no good. Billy was too far up on his chest, sinking all his body weight onto him.
You stood there and watched. You were confused and shocked on what was happening, on where this guy came from. You looked down, noticing a knife next to the person in the black cloak. You begin to panic a little inside, wondering whether this person was saving your life or here to take you both out.
It only then hit you that the knife and the black costume seemed way too familiar.
Oh shit...It can't be.
Was this, The Ghostface?
From what you and the rest of Woodsboro knew, that killer who committed all those murders years ago was supposed to be dead. So what was he doing here?
You snapped back into reality when you heard Ian trying to speak. Looking at the both of them, you saw Ian's arms swing violently once again. Billy had managed to dodge most the swings, his arms steadily pressing down on Ian's throat. He did take a few hits to the face though, but he had been through worse.
It wasn't until he started reaching for the mask.
Billy could only lean back so far, if he tried anymore Ian would gain the upper hand in a matter of seconds. He usually didn’t care, since they were going to be dead anyway, but he wasn’t going to kill you.
You noticed what was happening, even with Ghostface's back turned to you. You slowly crept your way towards them, until you could see Ian's face again.
His eyes were wide as plates and his skin looked tight as the killer pushed down on his throat. Ian's eyes snapped to you, making Billy turn his head a little to see you in his peripheral vision. You could tell by the look in Ian's eyes that he wanted your help.
Tough shit.
You slowly walked around the two, Ian was convinced you were gonna help him, beginning to reach for the mask again, fingers brushing the mouth, trying to find a grip. You kneeled, grabbing Ian's arms, pinning him down. Your gazed flickered towards the mask killer, to find he was already looking in your direction.
You decided to flash him a smile. Though you couldn't see behind that mask, Billy had the same expression.
You lowered your body down, until your mouth was leveled with Ian's ear. He was trying to fight against you, but he had no more strength. He was done for.
"See you in hell, fat shit." You spoke into his ear.
Gargles could only be heard, and the hockey game playing on the tv was basically non existent. The life Ian once had, was now gone. You slowly stood up, ghostface doing the same. You both looked at his lifeless body.
“I don’t know whether I should say thank you, or start running.” You said, letting out a laugh. It hurt like hell to speak. Your eyes moved to the masked killer and once again, he was already looking at you.
You both stared at each other for a few seconds, before he took a step closer to you. You didn’t back up, and for some reason you didn’t feel afraid. Billy reached out his hand, lightly touching your throat.
You weirdly didn’t mind the feeling, you weren’t scared of his touch, in fact, it was very gentle.
His hand trailed up, cupping the cheek that had been slapped. His thumb lightly rubbed your cheek and you couldn’t help but sigh.
“Thank you.” You told him, but he didn’t say anything. You knew he couldn’t speak, he wasn’t gonna let you find out who he was. If you recognized the voice or didn’t there was still a chance.
A car pulling up into the driveway made you and Billy snap your attention to the front of the house. He looked at you once again, seeing the fear in your eyes. He had to help you out some more, and you couldn’t be awake for it to work.
“I’m sorry.” Billy lowly mumbled, before knocking you unconscious.
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existslikepristin · 3 years
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Activated My Trap Card
This one is VERY old. Even from before What A Bummer.
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Tags: TheLounge?, CLC, Seungyeon, Yeeun, Eunbin, male reader insert, scary ladies, the most uncomfortable threesome with an audience of one, vote story
~~~~~
You stand in front of the door to Cube Entertainment's offices. You got a strange call a few days ago telling you to come to this address in order to "make a lot of money." You were worried that it might be something illegal, or a scam, but after you looked the address up you got a little excited.
And it seems like you were right to be! After a minute or two, the door opens and you see Seungyeon standing there, looking straight into your eyes. She's wearing a super low cut black tank top, a pair of jean shorts that look like they've been cut extra high for optimal showing off, and the most basic pair of black flip flops ever. She doesn't look surprised to see you.
"Yeah, there you are," she says in her deep, beautiful voice, putting her hands on her hips, "I knew you would be perfect. Come on in. I've got a job for you."
She stands aside to let you through the doorway and closes the door behind you.
Unsure of where to go, you wait for her to make the next move. She does exactly that, walking past you and letting her hand graze past your thigh on the way. That had to be an accident right?
With her back turned to you, you look down and she that her tank top is mostly backless, and her shorts reveal about half of her butt cheeks. There is so much skin on display to you right now. You make an effort not to look, but it's damn hard.
You're about to take another look when Seungyeon spins around gives you a deadly look in the eye. "So tell me... who's your CLC bias?"
Holy shit, why is she putting you on the spot all of a sudden?! She looks like she wants an answer, and fast! This really was a trap! Fuck!
Options: 1. (Picked:) Seungyeon 2. Seunghee 3. Yujin 4. Sorn 5. Yeeun 6. Elkie 7. Eunbin
~~~~~
"Y-y..." you stutter, trying to think about how fast you can turn around and open the door to run.
"Yeeun?" Seungyeon takes a step toward you. She's very, very close.
You stumble back and bump up against the door. Seungyeon follows.
"Y-you," you manage to say.
A mischievous half grin grows on her face. "Yu...jin?" She punctuates the "jin" part by pressing herself up against you. You're still nervous, but you suddenly think you know what this is about (that isn't some shit like assassinating you). She's soft but firm, like you can definitely feel the dancer muscles under her tender skin. Except for her tits, pressed against your ribs. Those are totally soft, other than two tiny points of hardness.
"Nah... you."
You feel Seungyeon's body shiver from top to bottom, and she slides one of her legs up yours, trapping you against the door just a little more. Her hands are suddenly on your shoulders.
"That's what I was hoping. I saw you a while ago. You didn't see me, but I saw a picture of me on your phone," She squeezes your shoulders a little, like she's getting needy, "Do you touch yourself when you see me?"
You gulp. You're really not sure if telling the truth about that will help your case here.
Then it's your turn to shiver, as Seungyeon licks your neck, then buries her face in it. "Tell me which one of my holes you fantasize about being inside the most."
Well, what do you say?
Options: 1. (Picked:) "I've always wanted your pussy wrapped around me." 2. "Do you think your throat can take all of me?" 3. "Spread your ass and I'll show you." 4. "Hole? But what about your tits?"
~~~~~
"I've always wanted your pussy wrapped around me."
...
Holy shit, you've never seen clothes come off a person so fast. You barely catch a glimpse of Seungyeon's nipples before they're smashed against your chest again.
"Well I want to wrap my pussy around your cock," she says, already lowering your pants, "Help me make that happen, okay?"
You're not sure how you're supposed to help, since you're pinned between the door and her paralyzing, hot body. You feel your pants dropping to the floor, taking your underwear with them. Your dick springs up and slaps Seungyeon's pussy. Of course you're already hard.
Seungyeon isn't waiting for anything. She lifts herself onto her toes, and your dick gets just enough room to be able point fully up. Your tip rests somewhere in her folds. She reaches around her back and you feel her fingers adjust you very slightly, and suddenly you feel your entire dick being engulfed by her as she drops back down.
She groans. Loud. You're very aware all of a sudden that you're having sex in the front hallway of an entertainment company's office and look around. Seungyeon grabs your chin and forces you to look into her eyes though. You see stars dancing around them, but that's probably because you're feeling light headed from the pleasure being forced onto you right now.
The look she gives you is... intense. The whole time she's moving her body just right to keep your dick inside her, despite the fact that she's so soaking wet and slippery and at such an awkward angle. She manages it well though.
"Do you like this? Hm?" She asks. You open your mouth to answer but all you get out is a moan as she squeezes your dick with her pussy. Against your stomach, you feel her abs working to make that happen. What a fucking talent!
She smiles and pulls your head down to her open mouth. You open yours too and it gets assaulted by her tongue, dancing just as wildly as her body does.
When she finally breaks away from the thing you could call a kiss, she moves her chest off of yours to let you get a really good view of her jiggling tits, shining with sweat. If you're honest, you've already seen most of them thanks to the clothes she wears, but with nothing to cover them at all they're absolutely amazing.
"I need you to... cum, alright?"
Woah, that's sudden. Does she mean inside?
"The first cum... happens fast," she pants between every couple of words. No wonder, since she's still fucking you while just on the tips of her toes, "but that's what... we need... You need to last... longer for the next round."
You definitely already feel your orgasm coming, she doesn't need to tell you that. But wait. Next round? What is she talking about?
Simple poll this time:
Choices: 1. Take charge and cum the way you want to! She didn't specifically say she needed you to cum inside her, but that's a risk you're willing to take. 2. (Picked:) Are you joking? She knows what she's doing and has a plan for MORE? Don't take charge, she'll make you cum the way she wants to!
~~~~~
No way you're risking doing something she doesn't want you to right now. Not after she mentioned a "next round."
"It's happening now!" you say through your half gritted teeth. You really hope she knows what you meant, but you're having a little trouble forming full, meaningful sentences right now.
Seungyeon gets both of her arms around you and squeezes. Her eyes lock on yours again and you're captivated. You can't look away. "Do it... then."
Her hips grind against yours, and your orgasm hits you like a runaway train. You're dizzy, but you can still notice that she's squeezing down on you. As your cum fills her up, her eyes roll up, she bites her lip, and a grin spreads across her face.
You barely register that you slump to the floor, with Seungyeon's clamping pussy bringing her down with you.
"You dumb fucking hooker."
Suddenly, your senses all come back to you. That wasn't your voice. Or Seungyeon's. Oh shit. You can't see where it came from. But you recognize it. You start to imagine yourself getting beat up by body guards, or thrown in jail, or... fuck, maybe exiled from South Korea? Is that a thing that could happen?
So, whose voice was it?
Options: 1. Seunghee 2. Yujin 3. Sorn 4. Yeeun 5. Elkie 6. (Picked:) Eunbin
~~~~~
With a semi-exhausted sigh, Seungyeon leans to the side and looks over her shoulder. You feel a sense of impending doom as you see that the voice came from the daddy long le-- er, you mean, "maknae" of CLC, Eunbin.
Eunbin is only about fifteen feet away down the hall, wearing shorts (not as short as Seungyeon's, but still revealing her full legs), a blue sweatshirt, and tennis shoes. She looks... well she looks stone-faced as normal, but you bet she's super angry, based on the tone of her voice.
"Beannie, it's all good, okay?" Seungyeon sounds annoyed. She stands up, a wet plop nearly echoing as she comes off your dick. She faces away from you. If you weren't terrified, you would be admiring the bottom view of her bare ass and pussy dripping with your cum. Actually, you just came inside her. You're suddenly even more terrified, thinking about the entertainment company lawyers that are about to sue you into oblivion.
There's a dead silence for a solid ten seconds as the leader and the maknae stare each other down. You barely have the self consciousness to cover your dick with your hands.
"Don't you want to try him out?"
You stare up at Seungyeon's back. Could she make this situation worse? Don't mock the witness!
Eunbin's deadpan glare lowers down and locks with your eyes. ShiiiiIIIIT. Her look goes a little further down, right at your hands. And she licKS HER LIPS, WHAT?
"I'm busy, ass whore. Besides, the bitch is waiting with her cunt wide open," she swears evenly, like she's discussing the mild weather. You would question what she's saying if you weren't so confused, and still light headed.
Seungyeon groans, this time with annoyance rather than with pleasure like earlier. She turns around and bends over to grab your arms and starts pulling. You have to assume she wants you to stand, so you try, but it's awkward, trying to stand without revealing your mostly softened cock. Once you're up, she yanks on your hands, flashing Eunbin. Yet, she only looks for half a second, then turns and walks through a doorway. The same one Seungyeon starts dragging you toward, all the while with your cum slowly dripping out of her onto the floor.
What the fuck is happening here?
And who's the "bitch" Eunbin is talking about?!
Options: 1. Seunghee 2. Yujin 3. Sorn 4. (Picked:) Yeeun 5. Elkie
~~~~~
As you make your way through the door, dragged by Seungyeon, Eunbin is nowhere to be seen, but there is definitely another person. You're not sure you recognize her though.
She's tied down with some soft looking rope to a cushioned table. And the ropes are all she's wearing, with the exception of a blindfold. The ropes are holding her down and holding her legs wide open, but her arms are completely free. Doesn't seem like effective bonda--
The door slams shut behind you, making you just about jump out of your skin. Eunbin was hiding behind it! She has on exactly the same expression as before, too. She must be determined to creep you the hell out.
Before you can do or say anything about that, Seungyeon grabs your chin and turns you to look at the tied up girl on the table again. "See there? That's Yeeun. She's been a very good girl until today. She's only had sex a couple times before, but last month she told us that she wants to be a little slut, so that's why you're here."
You see Yeeun biting her lower lip. Seungyeon reaches down and starts stroking your dick back to life.
"You can fuck her any way you want to, as long as it's hard, and as long as you can do it for a really, really long time. And if you can do that..."
Seungyeon drops to her knees and takes your mostly hard dick in her mouth, diving all the way to the base and quickly sucking off whatever was left from the first round. She pops back off and licks it from the bottom to the top.
"If you do that for her, I'll definitely be calling you back."
You look back and forth from the leader of CLC below you and the rapper in front of you. Should you really? This seems crazy.
"What will it be? You can take her sweet pussy all the way to the moon and back, but she's not on the same prodigious birth control I am,"
You mentally breathe a sigh of relief at that, but also wonder what the hell qualifies a birth control as "prodigious."
"If you're afraid of putting a baby in her though, we already pre-lubed her pretty little ass. It hasn't been used before, but you should glide righ-"
DEAR LORD, Eunbin's ever-expressionless face appears right in front of yours, out of nowhere, "Or you can face fuck her. I've been dildoing this stupid thot's dumb mouth for days to get her ready for your fatass penis, if you have the balls," she says, nearly monotone. You're seriously confused by her rude behavior here and suspect she might be hiding a torture room somewhere in this building.
From the table, you hear Yeeun. You may not be at a good angle to see her, but it's definitely her. You'd recognize that sweet, meek voice anywhere, "I'm ready... please fuck me?"
Holy damn. This is really happening isn't it?
Options: 1. (Picked:) Take that risk! Pussy time! 2. Well, if her ass is already lubed... 3. Don't risk Eunbin crushing your skull. Throat fuck Yeeun. 4. Why is titfucking still not an option?! Lol, jk, we all love her boobs, but she's not big enough for that. 5. Run the fuck away! These bitches are actually insane!
~~~~~
You take a deep breath. This is just plain insanity that you are witnessing before your eyes.
Insanity is contagious, apparently.
You step around Seungyeon, and stand over Yeeun. She's at just the right height, and your dick rests on her pelvis, between her legs. You hear a short gasp of excitement from her... and two more behind you, which is definitely still weird.
You back up a few inches, bend your knees just a bit, and move forward again. Yeeun is a bit small, so it takes some pushing, but you can see the anticipation building on her face (what isn't covered by the blindfold). With a thrust, you're in.
Yeeun sighs and a smile crosses her face. Seems you made a good choice. She's going to like this.
"Woohoo! Now make her a slut!"
Again, you nearly forgot about your audience. Seungyeon moves to stand right next to you, one hand on Yeeun's inner thigh and the other one squeezing your ass cheek. Yay, fun...
For hours, you pound Yeeun into the table. Seungyeon stays with you the whole time, climbing on top of Yeeun, sliding herself all over you, and licking... pretty much everywhere.
A couple of times you have to change things up, untying Yeeun and flipping her onto her stomach, re-angling her so you can hold yourself up mostly by your arms, and eventually scooting her to where her head hangs off the table while you kneel over her.
You cum at least four times, but it's hard to be sure, since you think you went basically numb after the first three hours.
Yeeun seems to have lost her mind around that same time. Her blindfold fell off at some point while you were fucking her from behind and now you can see that her eyes have become unfocused. Every time you pull out to adjust after the second hour, she whined and tried to get you back in. But anything coming out of her mouth eventually turned into needy moans.
You kind of wonder to yourself how realistic it is to have lasted so long, for Yeeun to have actually gone half comatose, or for this process to have "turned her into a slut," but hey, it was bliss for you.
Seungyeon gets on her knees between you and cleans off your exhausted cock (and the area around it) with her tongue. It's a little sore actually, but you're not about to complain.
She stands back up and wraps her arms under yours, pulling you in. "I think you were successful, baby. Yeeun is going to want so much more from now on. Let's hope the baby you definitely put in her doesn't slow her down."
Oh. Right.
"So, what's next? Want any kind of... reward before you go?"
With her hips slowly rubbing side to side against yours, it's pretty obvious what she means, but hey, she asked, so...
Options: 1. (Picked:) You're drained, but you'll try for Seungyeon! Even if it results in embarrassment! 2. You want more, but you don't think you can get it up anymore. Be smooth and give her your contact info. 3. Uh, yeah. The call you got said you were going to get paid money for this. That's a reward. 4. Maybe just something to drink? You're fucking exhausted! (Warning, this option is mad kink territory.)
~~~~~
With your cock just about ready to fall off, you aren't sure how well this will work, but you're willing to try for Seungyeon. You grab her by the hips. A smirk crosses her face, and she doubles down on grinding against you.
You lift her chin up for a kiss. It's your turn to take charge with her now. She coos into your mouth. Her fingernails lightly scrape either side of your spine, sending tingles all up and down your body. Her entire behavior just changed! Sheesh, and all you had to do was take the initiative in grabbing her? This girl changes her mind as fast as she takes her clothes off.
The sweetness continues for the better part of ten minutes. You could swear the room's temperature is evening back out, from the sun-like heat earlier to being very pleasantly warm.
Seungyeon slowly breaks away from the kiss, looking into your eyes with less intensity and more... care. She leans her head back, and you take the hint, diving in and sucking carefully at her neck. Her silent shuddering is only interrupted by a moan coming from behind you.
You can guess what it is, but curiosity gets you to turn enough to look. And of course, it's Eunbin. She's still staring, which is still creepy. But she's also got both hands moving inside her shorts. She's probably been there all along, so you guess she can stay and keep watching. You doubt she'd leave even if you asked...
Trying not to think too much about your audience, you get back to work on Seungyeon, kissing her tanned skin from her chin, to her chest, to her toned as hell stomach, to her clit. Once there, her knees shake, so you decide to set her down somewhere she won't fall. It's time to pay her back for all the oral service she's been giving you!
Seungyeon backs up at your touch, until she leans back against the table in the middle of the room, and onto Yeeun's half conscious body. The skinny girl groans as she's suddenly used as a back rest, but Seungyeon doesn't seem to have any interest in fixing the problem.
This is your moment. You're going to make Seungyeon squirm on top of her rapper. You'll make her explode! You start leaning down, tongue halfway hanging out of your mouth...
"Damn, you're still not hard?"
She's holding you back by the forehead, looking between your bodies down at your lifeless dick.
"W-well, yeah, I mean, I just..." you gesture down at Yeeun. That's where your hardness went, and it's still dripping out of her at a moderate pace!
Eunbin's hands are on your shoulders, pulling you away from Seungyeon. It's a bit of a shock, to say the least.
"I'll call you later! Buh-bye!"
The next thirty seconds are a blur. You're dragged, stunned, out of the room, through to the opposite end of the hallway you came in from, and shoved out a door into an alley.
"See ya, fuckface," is the last thing you hear from Eunbin before the door slams behind you.
What the hell...
The door reopens, and you spin around just in time to get a face full of your pants.
"Don't forget your stupid clothes, you degenerate," Eunbin throws you one last insult before the door closes again.
It's a little chilly out here.
[GAME OVER]
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miss-smutty · 3 years
Text
The Destructive Secret
Chapter 4
Summary- You've got a secret to hide and it's going to cause complete and utter devastation. It's only so long until your lies are going to catch up to you.
Pairing- Chris Hems x Reader x Liam Hems
Word count- 2,211
Warnings- Smut, swearing, angst, cheating
18+ Only!!
Disclaimer: This is an entire work of fiction/AU and has no affiliation to real life what so ever! This is a fictional story about fictional characters who happen to share names and faces with some real people.
Posted: 29th June 2021
Taglist:- @innerpaperexpertcloud @pandaxnienke @chickensarentcheap @mostly-marvel-musings @longlostinanotherworld
>The Destructive Secret Masterlist<
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"No not married but you do know her. You know her really well actually." Chris says while avoiding your gaze purposefully...
You could cut the tension in the room with a knife, silence so acute you could hear a pin drop. Liam waiting for an answer, Chris looking at his feet and you looking visibly anxious. Chris had drank way too much and now he was about to let all of your secrets loose. This isn't the way you want Liam to find out, surely Chris wouldn't be so cruel.
"I suppose you're not gonna tell me who it is?" 
"Not just yet, see how we go." He looked at you, if he so much as even looked slightly smug you would have slapped him right across his face. Instead you could see the hurt in his eyes, tears welling in the corners. You're both faced with an impossible dilemma, Chris wants you all to himself but doesn't want to lose his brother in the process and you want it all over and done with but don't want to hurt Liam. The latter of both is inevitable but you would take all the blame just so Chris didn't have to lose his brother, given the choice you would lose them both just so that didn't happen.
"Well on that note, I need to go to bed. I've gotta be up early in the morning." You avoid Chris' gaze, you're angry with him but you don't want to cause him more pain. 
"Yeah me too. I better get going. Thank you for dinner Y/N, it was lovely."
You risk a short glance at him, you're eyes softening when they meet. The moment broken when Liam speaks, reminding you where you are and who you're with right at this moment in time.
"Are you for real? You're really going to drop a bombshell like that and then leave? Fuck man." Liam runs his hand through his hair, letting air out of his cheeks exasperatedly.
"Sorry bro, I'll save the excitement for another night. I've said too much already." Chris apologises with his eyes as he passes you, his hands twitching by his side's with the need to touch you.
                             ******************
The next morning when you wake, your heart sinks knowing all the turmoil you're going to have to go through just to make it to the hotel without being spotted. All the messing about and hiding you have to do, checking in under a false name at different times. Making sure nobody follows you to the hotel and especially no one follows Chris. Getting caught checking into the same hotel would be dreadful, it wouldn't take a genius for the press to put two and two together, they wouldn't even care if it was true or not as long as they sold copies.
"Right babe, I'm ready to go." You pull your suitcase towards the door, stopping to wrap your arms around Liam.
"Have a good time, I'll see you soon." Wrapping his arms tightly around your waist and lifting your feet from the ground in a squeezy hug. "I'll miss you." 
"I'll miss you too, bye babe." 
"Bye. Love you. Let me know when you get checked in." He kisses you goodbye before watching you leave.
"Will do, Love you." You say over your shoulder, climbing into your silver, Audi convertible.
This is the part you hate the most, the part that made you question whether it was all worth it. It was, of course or you wouldn't be doing it, you wouldn't put yourself through having to pretend to be somebody else and praying your not caught by anyone. It only takes one person to notice you and Chris in the same hotel and it's over. You imagine having an affair is hard work whatever your circumstances but when your boyfriend and your lover are as famous as they are it becomes impossible. It's terrifying. 
You spent the car journey constantly checking your mirrors and making sure you weren't being followed. A huge sunhat and even bigger sunglasses covering your face as your heart beated faster than you thought was possible. A couple of laps around the hotel, making doubly sure you weren't being followed before you finally pulled into the carpark.
You had to constantly think, you couldn't let your guard drop for even a moment and it was exhausting. You were ready for it to be over and done with now, this just isn't fun anymore. Maybe you could run away together and start a new life somewhere else. Which one would you pick though? Who are you ready to give up? Would there even be an option to choose? Would Liam even be willing to forgive you if he knew you were sleeping with his brother? In love with his brother.
Your heart beating out of your chest, your fight or flight well and truly kicking in now as you walk up to the front desk. If there's any recognition in the receptionists eyes you're ready to turn right around and leave. The girl behind the desk, with long blonde hair has her eyes on the computer In front of her, thankfully not paying you much attention as you stand and wait for her to finish.
"Hi I'd like to book a room for two nights please." You stutter nervously, subconsciously checking over your shoulder while you spoke.
"Of course, is it just for yourself?" 
"Yes please, I'm just here for a work conference. I'd like a double bed if possible though, I haven't been able to sleep in a single since I was young." You giggle nervously, embarrassed that you'd told her information she isn't even slightly interested in.
"No problem, I'll see what I have for you." Her eyes barely left her computer as she spoke, she definitely didn't recognise you. The tension in your muscles relaxed a little as your eyes scanned the lobby.
"What name is it please?" She asked, one of the moments you'd been dreading. You hate lying but luckily you'd already come up with the fake name you were using, one you'd already used many times before in the exact same situation. It never gets any easier.
"Jessica Crawley." The names tumbled from your lips, names that had absolutely no meaning to you. 
"Room 101, floor 5. Is there anything else I can help you with?" 
"No thank you, that's great." The overwhelming feeling of relief at completing step one without any problems, rushes over you. Adrenaline spiking, making your legs feel like jelly.
"You're welcome, enjoy your stay. Don't hesitate to let me know if you have any questions." The girl says, smiling sweetly at you before going back to her work.
The elevator seemed to take forever to make its way down to you, your feet shuffling as you watched the numbers above the door, counting down. The overwhelming need to get to privacy and away from the many prying eyes of the people in the lobby was severe. Most were business men and women, that were so consumed in themselves they weren't paying special attention to anyone around them. There were also young couples, making their way through the lobby, probably on their way for lunch but the people that worried you the most were the random loners sat in the armchairs scattered around the lobby. They'd chosen the perfect place to watch, some pretending to read newspapers while their eyes discreetly scanned over the top.
They were much more inquisitive, much like yourself they paid more attention to the people around them. People watchers you liked to call them, these are the sorts of people that make you nervous. They see everything, noticing any minor details, you'd spent a lifetime perfecting 'people watching' which is how you knew to be wary. You could pretty much judge a person's personality just by watching them for a couple of minutes. If anyone was to spot you it would be one of these people. You felt thankful you weren't Chris, there is absolutely no way he was going to make it to the elevator without being seen at least once.
                             *******************
Chris didn't feel quite as nervous as you, this was a every day occurance in his life, avoiding paparazzi was near impossible for him. As long as you weren't seen going in to the hotel then it wouldn't matter about him being seen. Still, he'd worn his baseball cap and sunglasses to at least try and hide his identity. He wasn't nervous about being seen but more about having to face you after his fuck up last night. Now that thought was way more intimidating to him.
Casually strolling into the hotel, he tried to ignore the whispers of the people around him. People questioning if it was really him, young girls barely out of high school giggling at the sight of him. Chris quietly prayed that he would make it up to the room without anyone asking for a photo, not that he usually minded but today all he wanted was to spend every possible minute with you as he could.
The receptionist tried to make a fuss when his identity was confirmed during check in. The pale skin of the same blonde girl who'd checked you in, had turned a rather bright shade of red when she heard Chris' sexy Australian accent. You wouldn't blame her, it still makes you swoon whenever you heard him speak.
"I'm fine honestly, I don't want any special treatment. Actually if I could get away with going completely unnoticed during my stay, I will speak to your boss myself and tell them how accomodating you'd been." 
"Oh wow, really? Thank you so much Mr Hemsworth. I will make sure nobody bothers you and if you need anything at all just give me a call, I'll make sure you won't have to leave your room for anything." Chris smiled, pretending not to notice how she seemed to be flirting with him, badly. Tossing her hair over shoulder as she insinuated not so subtly for him to let her know if he wanted any 'special' treatment. Again, you don't blame the girl, infact you would've commended her confidence.
She handed over the keys to the penthouse, watching bright eyed as he walked to the elevator, pulling out his phone as he stepped straight in. 
"Hi babe, I've booked the penthouse suite, meet me up there?" Smiling a tight lipped smile at the girl behind the desk, who was still watching him intently as the elevator doors closed.
"Ok, it isn't very inconspicuous staying in the penthouse is it?" You shouldn't be surprised, he does it everytime. You remember the first time you ever saw a penthouse and how amazed you were that it was actually bigger than your own home at the time. That was a memory you shared with Liam, all of your first times had been with Liam, the thought made your heart sink.
"I mean they knew who I was as soon as I walked in, I think it would look more suspicious if I didn't stay in a suite." Chris answered, pulling you from your thoughts.
"I suppose that's true, I'll be up soon." You could hear the sadness in your voice, something you had to snap out of before meeting Chris.
"Good because I can't wait to get my hands on you." 
Sinking back onto the spongey mattress of your bed, tiredness washing over you already. The mental exhaustion of constantly having to play games and be on your guard at all times, catching up to you as you're finally alone.
Maybe that's what you need afterall, a chance to be alone to gather your thoughts, to workout your own needs and wants without spreading your attention between the two brothers.
You make a mental list of the pros and cons of both of them knowing deep down if Liam were the one for you, you'd have never have looked twice at Chris. They were so similar in a lot of ways but completely different in others.
Liam was the sweetest man you knew, so gentle and caring, attentive to your every whim and being so young when you first got together he was everything you were looking for.
Now being a woman that has gone through so much trauma in her life that had tainted your soul, darkened it with a lust for more.
Then Chris came along, he was still sweet and caring but less attentive to your needs unless it was in the bedroom. He was cheeky and funny, drop dead gorgeous and oozing manliness effortlessly. He was fire and passion. He was more. 
If you let yourself admit it, you wanted excitement, which is how you ended up here in the first place. You didn't want perfect anymore, you wanted a man who could do wrong and then make up for it in the most fulfilling way he knew how. Just thinking about it made your pulse race, Chris had put you through hell last night and now it was time for payback. You imagined Chris only a couple of floors above you, worried about the way you were going to act when you saw him and lord knows how much you're going to make him sweat.                    
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angellesword · 3 years
Text
SAVE ME | KTH (09)
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Summary: You were determined to kill yourself, but what would happen when instead of ending your life, you ended up summoning the devil of death?
Alternatively:
The Devil: I’m here to ruin you, I’m here to save you.
Genre: Demon au, e2l, angst, fluff, roommate au
Pairing: Devil!Taehyung x Doctor!Reader
Word Count: 3k
Warnings: bullying (verbal and physical) blood, mention of demons’ power, death (heart attack)
SERIES: CHAPTER 8 | CHAPTER 10
*unedited*
*** i bet you’re not expecting this update!! ahhh i just want to finish this fic before my birthday!!! wish me luck bc i have less than a month to do so!
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Your father was the person who taught you the meaning behind some Korean names.
It was some sort of bonding you two did when you were still a kid. The most memorable part was when your mother told you that she was pregnant, thus giving you the opportunity to choose a name for your baby brother.
Of course your father helped you decide. He told you different names and its meanings.
Jeongguk. This was what stuck to you the most. It meant center of the country. The moment you had heard about this, you instantly knew it was the perfect name for the unborn brother.
Jeongguk was meant to shine, to be the center, not just of the country, but of the whole world.
But you failed him.
You failed when there was a very short period of time where you were supposed to be making him the center of your attention.
And so now you reap the harvest of your failure.
Jeongguk was now the center of your life, the main reason why you were stressed out.
"Thanks for letting me know.” You clutched the phone near your ear tighter. "I'll be there soon." It took a lot of energy to say this, but you had to.
It had been months since Jeongguk started living in your apartment. You took him in despite his antipathy. Like hell you'd allow him to go back to his old house.
A house full of liars and users.
Jeongguk wasn't lying when he said your father died of heart attack. Your brother only told you about this weeks after the burial.
Everything had been taken care of. Your aunties, the siblings of your father, paid for all the expenses, but they were demanding to be reimbursed now.
Jeongguk also said that your aunties sold your father's house so now he had no choice but to live with them, but to do so, he first needed to pay for the amount of money they spent for your father’s burial.
Nothing was free. This was what they claimed. The money Jeongguk owed them had interest as well. Aside from this, your aunties also told Jeongguk that he had to pay for his share in rent and utilities monthly. If he couldn't do this, then he wouldn't be allowed to live with them.
Jeongguk begged your aunties to give him some time. It was obvious that he didn't have money, mainly because the siblings of your father took all of his assets.
Your brother felt helpless. He considered living on the streets, but then your aunties told him to go to you. You inherited a lot of money and rumor had it that you leeched off of your rich boyfriends for their wealth.
Jeongguk had been through a lot that was why you couldn't really blame him when did bad things—his way to destress.
"What did he do this time?" But Taehyung wasn't having any of it.
He already knew that Jeongguk got in trouble as soon as he spotted you looking for your car keys, face pale because of trepidation.
You were probably going to wherever the hell Jeongguk was. This had been your new routine ever since the younger boy moved in with you.
You had no idea how many times someone called you to inform that your brother was in trouble.
"The principal called. Jeongguk's in the disciplinary room.”
"Ah," the devil chuckled, bringing the magazine he was reading down on his lap. "Let me guess, catfight?"
"Don't call it that," you gritted your teeth. "This is serious, Tae. We need to go now.”
Although you couldn't say that Taehyung was entirely wrong. The principal explained that the reason why Jeongguk was brought to the disciplinary room was because he beat up his classmates.
You didn't have the chance to ask why since the only thing that was in your mind was your brother's safety.
You were certain you're going to lose your mind if you didn't seem him now.
Fortunately Taehyung realized that you weren't playing around so he did everything in his power to help you.
You couldn't deny that his presence was needed. You had seen his efforts to help you 'raise' Jeongguk.
He didn't look like the devil you knew. It was as though he turned into a person, someone who was simply looking after you because he cared.
Taehyung was no longer punishing you for trying to kill yourself back then, but maybe his reason was because you didn't really have the time to think about suicide now.
As stated, all you wanted to do was help your brother. You were trying to show him how sorry you were because he had to experience horrible things because of you.
It wasn't easy though. You felt like Jeongguk was going out of his way just to spite you. This was evident when you heard his response as to why he beat up two of his classmates.
"They're making fun of my satoori accent.”
You facepalmed. You couldn't believe he was capable of hurting people because of something like this. Jeongguk grew up in Busan and it had only been months since he transferred here in Seoul to study and live with you.
It was natural to still speak with satoori accent. Jeongguk should have just let it go and no—you were not siding with his enemy. They bullied your brother, but then Jeongguk's action was worse.
The two boys he beat up weren’t doing well. The blood on their faces said so. Your stomach was actually turning upside down just by looking at them.
You felt so bad.
But feeling bad wasn't enough.
You knew you had to face the consequence of Jeongguk's action.
No more running away.
"I'm sorry." Your lips trembled as you look at the parents of the victims.
Before they could speak, you already force Jeongguk to get on his knees.
"What the fuck are you doing?" Jeongguk screamed at you, yet you ignored him.
You held Jeongguk down, still forcing him to bow down. You were doing the same thing. Your knees hurt, but it didn't matter.
"Apologize to them, Jeongguk." You whispered to your brother.
He was struggling to remove your hand that was placed on his shoulder, the same hand that was forcing him down.
"I didn't do anything wrong!" Jeongguk was glaring at you.
This whole situation was like a slap in your face. You were forcing Jeongguk to do the things you didn't do when you hurt people in the past.
You could see yourself in him, but he didn't get the protection you had before.
Your mother tolerated your misconduct; you weren’t planning on doing the same.
"Apologize or you won't be getting your share." You whispered with force again.
Jeongguk's gaze darkened.
"You wouldn't dare."
"You very well know that I have the means to cut you off, Kookie." Your menacing tone was enough to send shiver down his spine.
You always got what you wanted. Jeongguk knew he would lose if he defied you.
It was better to say sorry to these dipshits rather than lose his share. He couldn't let you take away everything from him again.
So with his jaw still tensed, Jeongguk slowly turned to the parents of his enemies.
"I'm sorry." His heart was clenching as he said this. It was so difficult. "It's my fault so I'm willing to face the consequence of my action."
To face the consequence of my action. This was something you didn't get to do, yet you knew how painful it was to be the bigger person.
If you wanted, you could simply pay these people to let Jeongguk off the hook, but as stated, you wouldn't do that.
Jeongguk had the chance to be the person you should have been.
This was the right thing to do. The mistake must end with you.
"Don't think for a second that we'll forgive just because you apologized." One of the victim's parents glared at you. "You're a piece of shit. You are raising a monster!"
That was the last straw for Jeongguk. He was about to attack the parent, luckily Taehyung was able to stop him.
Your heartbeat doubled. You knew Jeongguk's action would drive them even madder, and so you bowed even lower, almost kissing the floor.
"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry!" You cried.
Taehyung came to know that you were just distracting the parents, so he did what he thought you wanted.
He dragged Jeongguk out of the room before he hurt anyone else.
"My brother and I won't run away. Please. We're sorry!" You crawled until you were just inches away from the parents.
You clasped your hands together, looking up.
Never in your entire life did you imagine doing this, but this was the least thing you could do for Jeongguk.
And so somewhere between sobs and the principal asking you to stand up, you managed to bargain with them. You were going to accept what they wanted, provided that they wouldn't be pressing legal charges against your brother.
They only agreed with this term because you didn't budge when they claimed they wanted Jeongguk to be expelled from this school. This was his punishment. Moreover, you had to pay for the medical expenses of the kids.
That was the end of discussion. You immediately ran out of the room to meet your brother and Taehyung, unfortunately you couldn't contact the both of them.
You didn't know, but Taehyung used his power to teleport him and Jeongguk to your apartment.
Taehyung didn't have much of a choice since the younger man kept on struggling to get away.
At least the action shut up Jeongguk for a short while.
"W-Wait!" To say that he was surprised to witness (and experience) Taehyung's teleportation ability would be an understatement.
Jeongguk was actually flabbergasted.
"I—we..." The younger boy's jaw drop, he blinked rapidly as he examined the place.
He wasn't tripping. He was definitely inside your apartment.
"How did this happen? W-What are you?" Jeongguk was panicking.
He liked to act tough; however he was still a boy. He couldn't fight someone like Taehyung, especially now that he had seen what this devil was capable of doing.
"Ah, it's simple." Taehyung flashed his boxy smile, completely unaware of the fear he was causing Jeongguk to feel.
"I'm the devil. I can do all kind of things—" he showed off more by levitating.
Jeongguk felt like he was going to pass out.
What the fuck.
But Taehyung was not done yet.
Still floating, Taehyung moved closer to your brother. The latter couldn't step backward since his back was already resting against the wall. Besides, he was too stunned to even move.
"—including this," without a warning, Taehyung touched the corner of Jeongguk's lips.
The seventeen year-old boy could only watch as the devil's hand sparkled.
Jeongguk felt strange at first, but then he could feel his bruise and scratches healing.
The two boys who bullied him still managed to throw some punches. It hurt and as seen, it bruised.
"There." Taehyung broke into a much bigger grin. "You look brand new."
Jeongguk touched his face. It didn't hurt anymore.
"A simple thank you would do." The devil's lips protruded into a pout when Jeongguk simply stared at him, saying nothing.
Minutes passed. Taehyung was actually done preparing hot cocoa for him and Jeongguk, yet the latter was still frozen on his spot.
"Why?"
Taehyung was expecting your brother to express his gratitude now that he mentioned how he wanted Jeongguk to say thank you, but your brother was exactly like you—always saying the wrong things.
"What do you mean why?" Taehyung handed the younger boy the cup of cocoa.
Jeongguk took it because he was freezing. It was cold outside and he couldn't deny that he was still a bit shaken after witnessing some bizarre...things.
"You said..." Jeongguk gulped. "You're the devil, so why did you heal me? Why are you helping me?"
Taehyung's brow shot up. Huh. His similarity to you was uncanny.
"That's your concern?" The devil shook his head, there was a smile on his lips. He thought Jeongguk was going to ask why he was lying, or why devils exist—things normal people asked.
"No, it's not," Jeongguk sighed, finally moving around. He paced back and forth after placing the hot cocoa on the table.
He scratched the back of his head as he stared straight into Taehyung eyes.
"I have a lot of concerns, okay!? I don't know why my sister's suddenly acting like she cares, I don't why I feel indifferent when I should be mourning the death of my father! I don't know how you managed to teleport! I'm—"
"Hey..." Taehyung touched the either side of Jeongguk's shoulders, forcing the younger to look at him.
"It's okay. You're okay..."
The devil figured that your brother was having a panic attack. He was probably so overwhelmed with everything that was happening. It didn't help that Taehyung surprised him by revealing his true identity.
Taehyung was such an idiot.
"I'm just so confused." Jeongguk managed to whisper. Tears filled his eyes.
Taehyung helped your brother sit on the couch. He was telling Jeongguk to breathe.
It took a while, but the younger boy managed to steady his breathing. Taehyung gave him more time to calm down before speaking again.
Both of them were sitting on the couch. Jeongguk was staring into the space while the devil was looking directly at your brother.
"I guess I really caught you off guard, huh?" Taehyung chuckled softly. He was carefully observing Jeongguk's expression.
"Were you telling the truth?" Your brother turned to look at Taehyung, which the latter didn't expect. He nodded nonetheless.
Taehyung was selfish. He said things just because. He never cared about what others would feel, but he learned fast. He realized that he shouldn't have revealed his identity just like that.
But he couldn't lie now, could he?
"It's true. I'm a devil." He smiled sheepishly. "The devil of death."
Jeongguk sucked in a breath. He tried to remember if he smoke pot today, but he didn't.
There were only two probable reasons why this was happening.
First: he was going crazy.
Second: Taehyung was telling the truth.
"You can ask your sister about me if you want. She knows."
Jeongguk sucked in a breath once more.
"If you're telling the truth...then...why..." He didn't know if he could question the devil.
Jeongguk was scared of his answer.
"Why did I heal you when I'm supposed to destroy you?" And so Taehyung completed the younger boy's question.
Jeongguk bit the inside of his cheek, nodding.
"It's a long story so I'm just going to tell you one thing.”
For some reason your brother nodded. He was captivated by the devil too. The same feeling you experienced when you first met Taehyung.
"Everything changes, Jeongguk." The devil uttered seriously. "Be it because of a person, experience, or even thing."
Taehyung laughed when he pointed at himself.
"Just look at me. Who would have thought that the devil of death would end up healing a mere mortal like you?"
Temporary, permanently, good change, bad change.
At the end of the day, it was still a change. This change would still affect something that could last forever.
"So yeah," Taehyung clasped his hand together. "I know it's ironic for me to say this, but there's goodness in every person. The one who hurt you before is probably out there, doing everything they can to help you."
Jeongguk knew exactly what Taehyung was talking about. He wasn't really being subtle about it. He used they, yet he was referring to you.
"I'll take that in mind," this was all your brother could say before retreating to his temporary bedroom.
Moments later, you arrived.
"Whoa.” The devil grimaced upon seeing your face.
You looked awful. Your hair was a mess and your eyes were bloody red. You were also shaking. It was cold outside.
"I-Is Jeongguk here? Is he safe? Did you treat his wounds? Do we need to bring him to the hospital—"
"Calm down, Barbie." Taehyung laughed, taking your cold hands to warm them up.
"Your brother is fine," he brought your hands closer to his lips, blowing hot air on them. "I may or may have knocked some senses into him."
You weren't sure about that. Jeongguk was a tough cookie. He had a rough childhood because of you.
"You didn't coerce him, did you?" You crinkled your eyes and Taehyung gasped dramatically.
"What do you take me for?" He tightened his hold on your hands. "I don't do what is not needed, you know?"
"Right." He was clearly talking about what he had to do back when you met Cha Eun Hye at the hospital.
"Jeongguk is sleeping now. I treated his wounds. Don't worry," he winked, though he didn't tell you that he used his power to heal your brother.
He didn't want you to freak out, especially because you seemed...tired.
"Thank you." You sincerely said.
You couldn't imagine this day without Taehyung by your side.
"No worries." The devil licked his bottom lip; his soft eyes made you feel like you were floating in the air.
You had never seen him this calm. The aura surrounding him felt refreshing.
He was still holding your hands.
"—you know I'll do anything for you," Tae continued and suddenly, you no longer felt like you were flying. Right now, you felt as if your heart was sinking deeper and deeper that you thought it was better to just let go and get lost in the abyss of his golden eyes.
You knew he was only saying this because your lives were connected, but the past months didn't feel like an act.
It felt real—like his intention wasn't a selfish act.
You realized that it didn't matter, not when you wanted to be selfish too. Today, you wanted to indulge on his warmth, to the comfort he gave.
And so you embraced him.
The devil didn't hesitate.
He hugged you back.
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Jac & Amelia
Jac: [So the vibe is evidently just showing up at the pre-drinks at this gfs house, we'll have to be some level of wasted to have the nerve so from the off it's a mood lol] Amelia: [a select gathering of the gays that you weren't invited too, but it's okay because Amelia can't throw you out when everyone else is like yeah come through] Jac: [literally you'd have to make such a drama and that's not you and also no one knows why you stopped being besties so it clearly appears chill from the outside, I vote the club should be a gay one so you have to commit to that hen] Amelia: [agreed because clearly her gf has planned this because Amelia's plan was to go and get that haircut and outfit with her mum so] Jac: [too pure for this bitch, we all know this is just an excuse for her to party like any other night really, which is rude, do something special but no, at least you're simply that hoe so it's not like we even have to work hard here, the flirting is blatant] Amelia: [it hurts my heart because you know Jamelia would have gone IN for each other's birthdays] Jac: [and her last one was start of transition year so they would've still been friends, AND it was her 16th so it would've been really poppin'] Amelia: [brb sobbing] Jac: [thank god jac is also miserable and only pretending to be living her best life or this would be even ruder] Amelia: [and thank god Amelia isn't in love with this gal] Jac: [and that lmao] Jac: [to me it should be like they just straight up make out on the dance floor 'cos her girlfriend is the 'its not a big deal omg!' type but even if it weren't, it is because it's Jac] Amelia: [hence when Amelia loses it it's Jac she's shouting at and being like how could you do this to me etc not her gf] Jac: [mhmm mHM we all know she's barely speaking at this point so she's not gonna say anything and your gf will be going off 'cos she looks the gobby type so you can slap her if you need babe lol] Amelia: [she so is the gobby type, Amelia just straight up dismissing her because this isn't about you babe I gotta scream at Jac rn thank you] Jac: [meanwhile we're just trying to walk away like the audacity] Amelia: [literally like SAY SOMETHING! because is there anything more frustrating than when someone won't react and you're literally 💔] Jac: [there is not, just shouting 'I'M SORRY' ala Tracy because we do not sound sorry at all but she is never a loud person so everyone else is gonna be shook like damn] Amelia: [your aunt Cass would be proud of that, but Amelia just gonna walk away] Jac: [good lord go home gal, or at least a different club lol, also like to point out she has a September birthday so also would've been after Savannah left so that would've been cheery lol] Amelia: [nice parallel because we know Amelia's walking home but fuck knows how far it would be, we're not at Erin's house now hens] Jac: [I'm sure you don't live right in town, your fam seems a suburb type so that'll be a nice trek, you poor bitch] Amelia: [just sobbing the whole time probably, even though she's not a crier like Savannah is] Jac: [you'd have to have a cry, if Jac hadn't gone catatonic as a defence mechanism, she would be too] Amelia: [which is why we're not getting our parents to pick us up because don't wanna be sobbing to this degree in front of them and her mum already hates the gf so we don't want the I told you so either] Amelia: [plus her mum probably thinks she's over Jac by now because we downplaying things forever] Jac: [parents can only be so much of a MVP at this age] Amelia: [I think when they see each other again it should be another argument that turns into Amelia kissing her because that's a trope for a reason] Jac: [yes, you are both owed it without the audience tbh] Amelia: [like I have no idea where they are when that happens, are you gonna show up on her doorstep to have another argument or what gal lol] Jac: [maybe you had somewhere you went together, idk where or what vibe, so you know she's gonna be there, even if it's just a different club and you're outside angsting] Amelia: [ooh excellent, yeah there's any number of places that could be 'theirs' you've known each other long enough] Jac: [precisely, it can be as everyday and unspecial or the opposite as we'd like, Dublin centre is not that big it's not insane to suggest] Amelia: [when do you think that is, clearly pretty soon after because the emotions have gotta be high] Jac: [yeah, sooner rather than later, like we did this for a reason and like you said, it's too frustrating when someone won't react to you] Amelia: [literally could be the next day/night I'd believe it] Jac: [i literally thought you meant the same night so yes i agree lol] Amelia: [omg that's even better tbh] Jac: like you turn round like AND ANOTHER THING, tensions are beyond that high] Amelia: [exactly] Jac: [at least Amelia is angry enough to break it off 'cos the levels of fucks you don't give rn about anything] Amelia: [yeah she's angry and sad enough to be like ffs what am I doing and actually go home] Jac: [thanks babe, we all know it happens but don't need it to literally look like 2nd choice to your hoe gf 'cos it ain't that] Amelia: [how am I gonna start a convo from here because I clearly am lol] Jac: [thank god you both drunk, I can do it if you want] Amelia: [go ahead if you think you can boo] Jac: you home safe Amelia: no, I'm dead in a ditch Jac: great Amelia: it'll make life easier for you, yeah Jac: my life couldn't be any rosier Amelia: 🥀🥀🥀 Jac: glad to see your flare for the dramatic ain't died in that ditch with you Jac: flair, which one Jac: idk Amelia: you took that over from me, remember Amelia: you really fucking did Jac: aren't you impressed Amelia: if you'd got there earlier you could've pushed me out of the way to blow the candles out on the cake my mum bought too Jac: you don't wanna be kids no more? Jac: could've said sooner Amelia: she's not a doll, she just wants to look like one Jac: who? Amelia: the girlfriend you wanted to share so badly Jac: oh her Jac: bride of chucky maybe Amelia: you did scare everyone with your apology Amelia: very exorcist-ish Jac: I was going for Carrie Jac: oh well Jac: still a better match than you two ain't it Amelia: oh you were trying to win a prom queen sash with acts of charity Amelia: I get it Jac: shouldn't you be throwing all this shade at her Amelia: wait, I'll add her in Jac: ha Jac: go ahead Amelia: she won't accept, sorry Amelia: I did try Jac: devastating Amelia: are you home safe? Jac: yeah Amelia: you do have the 👿👹👺👻 inside protecting you, I guess Jac: its always got a home inside me Amelia: well yeah, you don't ever kiss anyone long enough for it to transfer hosts Jac: you'll wanna get rid of the girlfriend then Jac: before you get infected Amelia: you already did that for me, such a good 🥳🎂🎁 Jac: couldn't think what else to get ya Amelia: 💐? Amelia: no? Jac: thought she might have beat me to it Jac: made a bit of an effort Amelia: she wanted me, that's all I needed Jac: past tense Jac: and that's definitely not the first time she's done that Amelia: what do you care? Jac: you think this is how i'd show it if I did Amelia: I try not to think about you anymore Jac: there's no need to make yourself sound stupid in the process Amelia: not when you're there to make me look it Jac: you'll get another girlfriend Amelia: because that's what is ripping my heart out about this Jac: that's your problem Amelia: stay the fuck away from me Amelia: if you'd done that I wouldn't have a problem Jac: I plan on it Jac: done what I needed to do Amelia: great Jac: enjoy what's left of your big day then Jac: have some 🎂 Amelia: you've made sure I can't Amelia: where's Savannah Moore with a 👏 emoji when you need her? Jac: Sligo Jac: last I heard Amelia: those poor country lads Jac: you've never cared about any lad a day in your life Jac: you can just admit you miss her Amelia: 😂 Jac: hilarious Amelia: not really Amelia: but I physically can't cry any more, I must be dehydrated Jac: unsurprising Jac: me either Amelia: 🍾🥂 Amelia: have a nice life then Amelia: probably leave tonight out of your achievements during the uni interviews Jac: nah Jac: diversity and adversity is all the rage Amelia: that's why I'll be mentioning it Jac: you're welcome x2 Amelia: 🙌 Jac: you sure she don't wanna join Jac: 'cos she's annoying me Amelia: I don't care what she wants or feel sorry for you Jac: yeah Jac: then tell her that Jac: not relaying your message Amelia: I have Jac: she's a liar too, makes sense Amelia: you're well suited Jac: besides the obvious Amelia: that you've done what you needed to do, yeah Amelia: tell her that Jac: I have Jac: not my fault she's so thick she only understands actions Amelia: if she's been messaging you since the 💋 you'll have had time to tell her everything I didn't Amelia: even if it has to be via charades Jac: the fact I didn't fuck her is all the information she's getting from me Amelia: the dancefloor's a bit public even for her Amelia: but maybe she'll be willing to break the rules for you, that's what people do Jac: let's not pretend it was about her Jac: only room for one delusional person in a relationship, don't you know? Amelia: you're ready for that, are you? Amelia: I don't know anything about relationships as it turns out Jac: first cut is the deepest Amelia: if you're going to sing, it's meant to be Happy Birthday Jac: yeah, you wish Amelia: I only got the one and I've already used it Jac: don't tell or it won't come true Amelia: I don't remember it now anyway Jac: bullshit Amelia: if it was 💇🏻 related it definitely didn't come true Jac: you didn't get a fringe Amelia: I still hate it Jac: it's not why you got cheated on Amelia: thanks, that makes me feel loads better about 👧🏻 Amelia: can you just take the posts down please Jac: I dunno Amelia: Jac Jac: fuck sake Jac: one thing Amelia: just do it Jac: then that's it Jac: there's your present, I don't owe you nothing Amelia: no, then that's it because I don't want anything to do with you Amelia: it doesn't make us even Jac: I don't give a shit about being even with you Jac: I win Jac: end of Amelia: it's not a fucking game Jac: you're the only one not playing Amelia: so leave me out of it Jac: that's another favour Jac: pick one Amelia: fuck you Jac: i'm keeping the pictures up then Amelia: enjoy your win Jac: naturally Amelia: 👏👏👏 Jac: you aren't her Amelia: you aren't you Amelia: it still doesn't make us even Jac: maybe you never knew me Jac: we weren't friends, after-all Amelia: there's no maybe about it, if we were ever friends you wouldn't treat me like this Jac: nothing is as simple as you'd like it to be Jac: but sure Amelia: you really hurt me again, it's that simple Amelia: and this time it was deliberate Jac: and you don't hurt the people you love Jac: grow up, Amelia Amelia: not like that Jac: that's easier for you Amelia: what about ANY of this is easy for me? Amelia: you told me to try, I did Amelia: now what? Jac: it isn't my responsibility to worry about that Jac: you figure it out Amelia: I had it figured out and you tore it down Amelia: take some fucking responsibility for that Jac: what, with your shit girlfriend who doesn't give a fuck about you Jac: that was wrecked before I got there Jac: deal with that Amelia: you wrecked me before she got there Amelia: I still think about you all the time, miss you all the time Amelia: and I do have to deal with that, all the time Jac: and I've got nothing to deal with Amelia: of course you do Amelia: happy people don't gatecrash and ruin other people's birthdays Jac: then you'll forgive me for not feeling sorry for you Amelia: I don't want you to feel sorry for me, I want you to be sorry for what you just did Jac: you want a lot Amelia: not this time Amelia: it's bare minimum Jac: I'm happy to disappoint and leave you wanting Amelia: then you win again Amelia: congratulations Jac: yipee Amelia: Don't contact me again unless you're got something to say that means something Jac: fine Amelia: you sound faker than Savannah could ever Amelia: it'd be impressive if it worked Jac: have I contacted you before now? Amelia: that doesn't matter because today you did Jac: today I ruined your relationship and birthday Jac: then I asked if you got home Amelia: yeah, and that all means something Jac: it means I wanted to fuck up your life Amelia: at least that wish came true Jac: there's always shooting stars and eyelashes when there isn't candles Amelia: there isn't a quick fix for this Jac: there's no fix Jac: there's only out and it's still 2 fucking years away Amelia: you were supposed to give me time, that's supposed to be one Jac: well I didn't feel like it today Amelia: clearly Jac: get over it Amelia: I'm not even through it, it literally just happened Jac: I'm not apologising, I can't be any clearer Amelia: then don't Amelia: I didn't know how to beg you when we were friends, I can't do it with this version of you Jac: Done? Amelia: I was done before I actually got home Jac: Well I've not gone home Jac: so we both lied there then Amelia: Where have you gone? Jac: what's it to you? Amelia: I don't want what happened to Is to happen to you, or worse Amelia: I care about you Jac: it won't Amelia: I'm calling your parents Jac: maybe I've told them you're obsessed with me already Amelia: maybe but it's still ringing Amelia: they can decide what they want to do Jac: you're such a snitch Amelia: because I really care what you think of me right now Jac: nah, just hope it makes you feel good about yourself worrying my parents for nothing Amelia: I don't feel good about myself because of you Amelia: your parents are irrelevant to me Jac: we've got that in common then Amelia: they're probably going to want to talk to you and I don't so goodnight Jac: Bold of you to think I'd answer Jac: but it is a reason to turn my phone off so yeah Jac: later Amelia: you're really 😎 we get it Jac: that's what I'm doing Jac: you're so smart Amelia: it's why you want to keep the pics up Amelia: like a 🏆 Jac: i wanna keep em up so you have to see them Amelia: I don't have to see them, I've already blocked you both Jac: 😂 Amelia: What's funny? Jac: 🤡😥 would've been more applicable, perhaps Amelia: probably Jac: you can pal up with Is again, she's up for it Amelia: yeah because I really want to drag her into whatever 🎪 you've started up between us Jac: you're so considerate Amelia: something really fucked up happened to her, you were there, don't act like you don't remember Jac: and you weren't there Amelia: I know that Jac: then you don't get to say shit to me about it Amelia: I'm not, I'm saying this isn't about Is Jac: when is it ever Jac: poor girl Amelia: stop it Jac: you walked out on her Jac: she didn't have enough daddy issues? Amelia: I walked out on you Jac: same difference Amelia: you said you'd let me Jac: and I did Amelia: until now Jac: you're only 17 once Jac: it's not going to happen again Amelia: it shouldn't have happened at all Jac: should woulda coulda Amelia: promise me that this is it Jac: I don't fancy your girlfriend Jac: kissing her was bad enough Amelia: I mean, promise me that I don't have to look over my shoulder for the next 2 years in case you decide that you want to ruin my life again Amelia: because I can't Jac: Amelia Amelia: I'm serious, I'll leave school before I let you do this to me for a third time Jac: I'm not in a position to be making promises about anything, to anyone Jac: I'll try Amelia: okay Jac: just Jac: I don't know Jac: never mind Amelia: you're scaring me, you know Amelia: I should've made you promise not to do any reckless shit back then instead of the other way round Jac: everyone's scared Jac: they say it like I can change it Amelia: I thought I was doing the right thing but everything just keeps getting worse Amelia: for me, you and Is Amelia: even for Savannah, Sligo for fuck's sake Jac: even if you'd done it different Jac: I'd still have done the same Jac: it still would've all happened Amelia: what are you going to do now? Jac: nothing matters now Amelia: you matter Amelia: to me Amelia: come to my 🏠 I'll call your parents back Jac: we're not doing this again Jac: no Jac: it's bad enough i have people in my life i can't get rid of Amelia: we're not doing anything Jac: stop caring about me Amelia: I can't Jac: how much more do I have to ruin your life Amelia: you have ruined it, that doesn't mean I want you to be dead in a ditch Jac: all I'm going to do is break your heart over and over and then I'm going to leave forever Amelia: tonight it's already broken and that's all I'm talking about Amelia: take the guest bedroom Jac: no Jac: because then my family will just think we're friends again and that I'm fine Jac: I'll go home, okay, just stop Amelia: if you stop lying, I'll stop this Jac: I'll send you proof, for fuck's sake Amelia: okay Jac: fine Amelia: [we're just waiting for that pic like] Jac: [however long this is gonna take, at least you're probably a bit more central, the most begrudging pic of the front door lmao] Amelia: no, put your outfit in it so I know it wasn't stored on your phone Jac: 'cos I just have pictures of my door Jac: [but does, some weird angle to not get your face in] Jac: haven't got a newspaper, so sorry Amelia: if you hadn't stopped the party early, they might have been delivered Jac: it was a crap party anyway Jac: she hadn't even booked a table Amelia: Yeah Jac: at least you can have a better girlfriend for your 18th Amelia: can I? Are you going to let me Jac: probably not Jac: but if she's less easy to ruin then there's nothing I can do about that Amelia: you'd have to try something else, that's all Jac: obviously Jac: I'm still smart Amelia: I'm not giving you a compliment Jac: I'm not saying I'm not going to ruin your chances at happiness Amelia: it's not like I need you to Amelia: SO capable on my own Jac: it's not taking credit if you're making excuses for me Jac: but alright Amelia: I'm talking about the 💇🏻 which you can't take credit for Jac: it suits you Amelia: that is the most hurtful thing you've ever said Amelia: take it back Jac: it's also true Jac: and you wanted me to stop lying Amelia: 😒 Jac: at least you don't look like every other girl now Amelia: you think I did before? Amelia: also that's because no other girl wants to look like 👧🏻 Jac: I mean everyone has the same hair Jac: you stand out more Amelia: you don't Jac: well I'm special, obviously Amelia: I know Jac: 🙄 Amelia: 😉 Jac: you're an idiot Jac: Jude better be at a sleepover Amelia: her hair stands out Jac: you should tell her that Jac: she'll be so glad her attention-seeking doesn't go unnoticed Amelia: she think I'm flirting with her so no Jac: oh yeah Jac: you're a predatory lesbian now Amelia: I kissed you Jac: after I kissed your girlfriend Amelia: you don't fancy her Amelia: that wasn't why you did it Jac: she fancies herself enough Amelia: So does Savannah, that wasn't a problem for you Jac: don't talk about her Amelia: sure, I wouldn't want to upset you Amelia: what's the point being 💔 if you're not the saddest Jac: she's gone, there's no point talking about her Amelia: my parents know hers, she's not gone from dinner table conversation at my 🏠 Jac: sucks for you then Amelia: sucks more for her that she's been sent to catholic school Jac: Catholic school? Amelia: yeah, her dad had that brainwave Jac: that is unfortunate Jac: probably a better school than ours though, so she'll be thrilled Amelia: it's my dad's favourite joke threat now Jac: at least you could avoid me Amelia: true, I should call his bluff and take him up on it next time Jac: go for it Jac: it's only me that has to write off this shit school on her uni app Amelia: the rest of your app will more than make up for it Jac: that's the plan Amelia: exactly, so it's not technically a compliment Jac: you're shit at this Amelia: thanks Jac: no, that really wasn't a compliment Jac: not one of your not technicallys Amelia: 😏 Jac: did you get a car Jac: I bet you got a car Amelia: [a picture of it because why not say she did] Jac: just got to pass now Jac: then you can go where you like Amelia: then I can runaway Jac: nah Jac: they'd take you off their insurance and you'd be fucked Amelia: because I'd never drive without insurance Jac: the police would be frantically looking for you as is Jac: that's always how murderers get caught out Amelia: 🤫 you're ruining this too Jac: you fantasize on your own time Amelia: this is my own time, you're home safe Amelia: I don't owe you my full attention now that your 👅 isn't in my ex girlfriend's mouth Jac: have you kissed anyone else Amelia: no Jac: do you regret it being her Amelia: it wasn't you, that's what I regret Amelia: but it couldn't be so Jac: yeah Jac: at least it was a girl Amelia: I'm not stupid enough to kiss any boys Jac: some just call it heterosexual Amelia: and I'm not so it'd be stupid for me Jac: alright Amelia: but I should probably kiss more girls Jac: why should you Amelia: because she'll think all the wrong things if I don't Jac: true Jac: I thought you didn't care about what people thought though Amelia: I'm going to have to find new friends from somewhere Jac: don't you gays stick together Amelia: she sticks with them and I don't want to see her Jac: you move fast Amelia: I don't really have a choice, do I? Jac: I don't need friends Amelia: handy since you don't have any Jac: that's why I don't Amelia: yeah, because you only care about what you need Jac: duh Amelia: did you ever care about me? Jac: don't be stupid Amelia: did you ever care about me when it wasn't because you needed something? Jac: what kind of question is that Amelia: one I need the answer to Jac: we were friends forever Jac: what did I get from it half the time Jac: no more than you did or didn't Amelia: okay Jac: that was a dick move making me answer that when you already knew Amelia: I didn't know Amelia: whenever I talk to you I end up with more questions than answers Amelia: and end up questioning my sanity Jac: you don't need to Jac: your work here is done Amelia: you can't tell me what to do when you don't even do what you said you were going to Jac: so you're going to continue to make a bad decision, just to be awkward Jac: that's smart Amelia: because you have such good reasons for doing what you did earlier Jac: 'course I do Amelia: go on then Amelia: tell me them Jac: already did Jac: I wanted to fuck it up for you Jac: felt great Amelia: there's smarter ways to feel good, and easier Jac: I've tried those Amelia: oh well I loved being your little experiment, thanks Jac: whatever Jac: it needed to be done Amelia: no it didn't Amelia: you keep saying that Jac: you don't get it Amelia: I don't buy into your fake bullshit, no, and that's all you've given me all night Jac: what's fucking fake about the fact I can't stand to have anyone around me happy? Jac: there's nothing fake about misery being the only thing I can stomach now Amelia: you didn't break up your parents or ruin your brother's music career, you sought me out when I haven't even been around you Amelia: you're full of shit Jac: trust me, I'm doing my best Jac: and you're full of shit if you're now trying to say you don't see me every day Jac: and that it isn't the fucking worst Amelia: I thought it was, until you did this Amelia: now I can say today was the worst Amelia: you're so fucking selfish and cruel Jac: nothing has changed Jac: I sped up your inevitable break-up, that's it Amelia: no, you went out of your way to hurt and humiliate me Amelia: everything has changed Jac: if you say so Jac: it wasn't the first time for me Amelia: who are you? Jac: it doesn't matter Amelia: who the fuck are you? Jac: I don't know, Amelia Jac: alright Amelia: you can't treat people like this Jac: then tell everyone what I did Jac: I don't care Jac: you could've done something about it Amelia: what did you want me to do? Jac: I thought you might put up more of a fight Amelia: for what? Against what? Jac: because I humiliated you Amelia: it wasn't the first time for me either Jac: never like that Amelia: I'm not going to fight you Jac: your loss Amelia: I keep telling you, I care about you, I don't want to hurt you Jac: I wish you'd stop Amelia: I wish I could Jac: yeah Jac: well Amelia: it's my loss, like you said Jac: don't worry, I've got my own Amelia: that makes me feel loads better Jac: it should Amelia: it doesn't Jac: you're infuriating Amelia: says you Amelia: I'm so angry at you Jac: because I wanted you to be Jac: that's the correct response Amelia: no, because I love you too much to hate you Amelia: because it won't go away Amelia: and I don't want to feel like this for the rest of my fucking life no matter what you do Jac: I don't have the answer Jac: If I could make you stop then I would Jac: but I don't know how Amelia: me either Jac: there's nothing I can do if you don't hate me by now Jac: I dropped you for Savannah Jac: I did everything I did tonight Amelia: I was there, I don't need you to recap Jac: I couldn't have made it easier Amelia: there's something wrong with me, there must be Jac: not as bad as me Amelia: my mum said at the time that I fell in love with you years ago and I can't expect to fall out of it in a few weeks or months Jac: logic adds up Amelia: she thinks I'm over it now so clearly not Jac: you probably said you were Jac: or near enough Amelia: the girlfriend thing kind of said it for me Jac: yeah well Jac: I've had loads of boyfriends Amelia: you're not in love with me Jac: I meant it doesn't mean anything, necessarily Amelia: yeah Amelia: my mum is more old fashioned though Amelia: romantic or whatever Jac: more romantic than your girlfriend, yeah Amelia: 🙄 Jac: she wasn't good enough for you anyway Amelia: I'm not good enough for anyone Amelia: I'm literally still in love with someone else who isn't them Jac: it isn't that simple Jac: you can feel things for more than one person Jac: you just, didn't for her and she wasn't worth it Amelia: maybe other people can but I don't Jac: how would you know Jac: it just hasn't happened yet Amelia: I'm too self aware if anything Jac: that's some lesbian nonsense Amelia: I'll put it in my bio then Jac: tinder Amelia: I'm not kissing that many girls, she'll definitely think all the wrong things Jac: be kicking herself, like Jac: or is it only okay when she does it Amelia: probably Jac: just like a lad Amelia: 😣 Jac: awh Amelia: I can't be bothered Jac: with girls? Amelia: I'm not trying anymore, you didn't keep your promises anyway Jac: what does that mean? Amelia: it means I don't care, my life can stay the mess you wanted it to be Jac: alright Jac: not like I can turn around and say 'no don't' now Amelia: and if you turn around you won't see me Jac: what? Amelia: school, I'm not doing it either Jac: shut up Amelia: online maybe so my dad doesn't rage Jac: that's bullshit Amelia: so is this Jac: no, fuck you Amelia: 😂 Jac: so you all get to fucking leave and I'm the one stuck dealing Jac: nah Amelia: I've got nothing to stay for Jac: it's school, no one does Jac: jesus Amelia: you said yourself it sucks having to see me every day Amelia: I'm doing you a favour Jac: you are ridiculous Jac: you think you can just run away like this is some shit indie song Amelia: I've tried the alternative Amelia: it didn't go great Jac: you think Savannah is bad? at least her parents made her go Jac: you're such a spoilt brat Amelia: I don't think about Savannah Jac: you don't think about anything Jac: christ Amelia: your audacity is another level Jac: your stupidity is worse Amelia: yeah, I've proved that loads of times over Jac: fucking hell Jac: your life is so hard, Meelie, yeah Jac: everyone thinks its my fault, what happened to Is Jac: and the more she says otherwise, the more it sounds like it was Amelia: no they don't, I don't Jac: well you love me so you're clearly insane and a bit biased Amelia: even if I hated you I'd still know that you weren't the one who assaulted her Amelia: it's his fault, nobody else's Jac: me and Sav still ran like we had something to hide Jac: that's all anyone cares about, working out what Amelia: you were scared, in shock probably Amelia: you felt like it was your fault Amelia: that doesn't mean it was Jac: all I know is she's fucked off, no one will say anything to Is, so it's all down to me, whatever people wanna say or think about it Jac: so yeah, sorry I think your idea is fucking laughable but been there, done that Jac: didn't solve anything, it only made the rest worse Amelia: I know it's a stupid idea, alright Jac: you can't go, alright, you just can't Amelia: you know I'll fight the whole school before I'd ever fight you Amelia: I'll do it for you too, if that will help Jac: Yeah, I do Jac: nothing will help but Jac: at least you're still here Jac: nothing else is the same Amelia: I'll be in detention every day for the next 2 years if that's what it takes to shut people up Jac: I don't deserve it Jac: or anything but hate from you, and I do fucking know that Amelia: you don't deserve to get the blame for being there and being her friend Amelia: I should've been too Amelia: and after it happened we should've talked Jac: maybe it's just karma Jac: I've never been a good friend to her and by the time it happened Jac: well Jac: I made you leave Amelia: I ruined our friend so I had to leave Amelia: *ship Amelia: that's not your fault either Jac: maybe it is Amelia: it's not Amelia: I shouldn't have told you how I felt Amelia: or been jealous of Savannah Amelia: or made such a big deal about the date you went on Jac: no Jac: I get it Jac: you weren't wrong Amelia: I did the wrong thing by leaving you and Is Jac: I couldn't wish the alternative on you Jac: having to stick around and watch Amelia: I still had to watch Amelia: I couldn't go that far Jac: I know it's my fault because it happened again Amelia: what? Jac: Savannah Jac: I kissed her Amelia: I don't understand Jac: you should have been jealous of her Jac: I mean Jac: you know what I mean Amelia: you mean you felt something for her Jac: I didn't want to feel any of it Jac: but she was straight and you weren't so having her around was meant to be easier Amelia: why didn't you just tell me? Amelia: you lied and lied and made me feel crazy Jac: because I feel crazy Jac: I fucking am Jac: I just Jac: it's not like I left that conversation and told her Jac: I kept on and got with lads and pretended to like it, tried to Amelia: everything you said, everything you did Amelia: oh my god Amelia: I can't Amelia: I can't take this in Jac: like I said, it's fucking karma Jac: I fucked it with you and it happened to me Amelia: I'm supposed to feel what, that she queerbaited you? Happy? validated? Jac: I don't know Jac: probably Amelia: did you know how you felt about her when I told you how I felt? Jac: why? Amelia: because you told me over and over again that you liked boys and you'd change that if you could Jac: yes, and I told her the same thing Jac: and I acted accordingly Amelia: I've spent so long feeling horrible for putting you in that position and none of it was real Jac: it was real Jac: I don't want to be Jac: I want to be straight Amelia: it isn't a choice Amelia: and you can't just twist everything to make it one Jac: acting or not acting on it is Amelia: so why did you choose to act on it by kissing her, if that's what you think? Jac: it was a mistake Jac: when we left Jac: after Is Jac: and it was just us Jac: then it destroyed everything and she's literally run away Amelia: and then you destroyed what was left after she'd gone Jac: yes Amelia: great Jac: I'm aware Amelia: are you? Amelia: for years I thought things were one way only to be told they weren't and now you're telling me an entirely different story again Amelia: 🤯 Jac: because we don't live in the ideal world where I accept myself for liking girls and I choose the right one and we live happily ever after Jac: we live in the world where I kissed Savannah and she looked at me like I was the boy who assaulted Isabelle Jac: and that's how I feel about it, and I would rather pretend to be straight forever, and have no real friends again, than have to do that, and feel that disgust again Amelia: we live in a world that doesn't revolve around Savannah fucking Moore Amelia: because she doesn't accept you, you can't accept yourself? No Jac: it's not her fault Jac: the rules don't make no fucking sense Jac: do you know how often she told me she loved me, how beautiful I was, and smart and perfect and kind, that she wanted me in her life forever? Jac: but that doesn't mean she wants to kiss me Amelia: that's why it literally is her fault Amelia: she flirted with you more than I EVER have, or would dare to openly do because I would get called a predatory lesbian and she gets likes and follows Jac: but she meant it Jac: I know she did Jac: that's just friendship to her Jac: it's too confusing Amelia: you want her to have meant it the same way you did, like I wanted you to with me Jac: but I did Jac: I lied Jac: so I know it doesn't make a difference now Jac: but still, you weren't wrong and I did, I am, whatever Jac: it was shitty to lie, I know, I accept it Jac: but she meant it all but she is straight...how does that work Amelia: I don't know Amelia: straight people are weird Jac: I don't want to find that relatable Jac: I want to be normal Amelia: I'm not abnormal, shut up Jac: fine, straight Jac: I don't want to ever have to think about this ever again Amelia: why do you want it so bad? Jac: so I don't feel like this Jac: the not knowing Jac: how much it hurts Jac: boys are easy, I told you Amelia: because you don't like them Amelia: if you were straight you'd get hurt just the same Amelia: you said it, Valentina's no different than a lad Jac: lads just like me Jac: I've never kissed any lad and had them recoil Amelia: they liked me too, it doesn't mean I had to like them back Jac: I mean it's not the same Jac: if a lad didn't like me, he'd have reasons Amelia: loads of girls like you too, I was friends with them for a bit, I heard all that gossip Amelia: Savannah's reason is that she doesn't like girls, any of them Jac: but she loves me Jac: more than she ever did Ty, I fucking know it Amelia: not like that, like Is loved us Jac: I can't stand it Amelia: I know Jac: you know I am sorry Jac: don't you Amelia: yeah Jac: you just had come so far and had done so much work Jac: it wasn't fair Jac: what I did wasn't, but it wouldn't have been to act on it, when I wanted so badly to be straight, for everything I did tell you to be true Amelia: no, I was in exactly the same place that we left each other in Amelia: you're not the only one who can lie Jac: I'm just so sorry but that's worth fuck all Jac: I hate how stupid all of it seems now Jac: redundant Jac: but that's close to a fair punishment, I suppose Amelia: you've already been punished Amelia: and sorry always means something when it's a real one Jac: I feel Jac: I don't Jac: I'm broken Jac: I don't even want to be a person now Amelia: I don't want to find that relatable Amelia: but it is Jac: fuck's sake Jac: see, why would I choose this? Jac: even if they're weird, this never happens to straight people Amelia: of course it does Amelia: Savannah's parents are fucked Jac: just because they don't love each other no more Jac: when they got together, I'm sure they both knew Amelia: still, her mum's so broken she's barely a person Jac: all I'm saying is we're getting dangerously close to comparing being gay to a mental illness Jac: which is what homophobes say and I'm not trying to be the confirmation Amelia: it's not being gay, it's loving the wrong person Amelia: there are happy gays, I've met some Amelia: and your brother isn't being held back by it Jac: don't get me started Amelia: Jude's love life is messier than his Amelia: more dramatic Jac: he'll end up with a girl Amelia: you don't know that Jac: wait and see Amelia: yeah, I'll stalk him from afar like a fangirl Amelia: 🤢 Jac: it's not the same either Amelia: you love a competition Jac: yeah, this is so much fun Jac: him and Jude are the same Jac: it doesn't mean anything to them, so they aren't getting hurt Jac: they don't care, it's not serious Amelia: you've got me, we're very much the same Amelia: in this anyway Jac: I don't want to love anyone ever again Amelia: then don't Jac: that's why I have no friends Amelia: yeah well you don't need them, that's the line and the lie, right? Jac: it's not funny Jac: I can't be trusted Jac: with any kind of relationship with a girl Amelia: I'm not laughing because me either Amelia: I make bad choices and I'm proven stupid, remember Jac: it's so fucking isolating Amelia: school is anyway Amelia: we're all in boxes Jac: you never used to hate it this much Amelia: now you understand how much I hate everything Amelia: how exhausted I am Amelia: it'd be nice to have the solidarity if it wasn't so horrible Jac: I'm just trying to get used to it Jac: accept it Amelia: at least you don't have to see her every day Amelia: maybe that'll make it different Jac: I never get to see her again Amelia: you don't know that either Jac: I do Jac: she's unlikely to stop by when she's seeing her mum Amelia: you verbally recoiled from me, ruined my birthday, nobody would call it likely that we're talking Jac: naive optimism is exactly what got you here Jac: don't even need to scroll for the reminder Amelia: ouch Amelia: you always find new ways to hurt me Jac: you really did just say you made bad choices and were stupid Jac: continuing this conversation is just another one for the list, probably Amelia: I can say it and do so you don't need to Jac: alright, alright Amelia: you're blocked though, this is the only place you could try to Jac: I could make another post but the point has been made well enough I reckon Amelia: it's not my birthday now so there's no point Amelia: ⛅ Jac: sod you then Jac: don't want you getting the wrong impression Amelia: 😂 bit late for that Jac: yeah Amelia: my dad'll be up soon I'll just wait ☕ Amelia: don't need you to entertain me any further Jac: you gonna tell him about your shit birthday Amelia: I'll tell them both we broke up and they'll be thrilled Amelia: it's all they want to hear Jac: you can tell them it was my fault, it doesn't matter to me Amelia: why would I do that? Jac: dunno, but having someone else's parents take over and shout at me for a bit might be mildly entertaining Amelia: they think I'm over you, they want me to be better Amelia: I'm not going to ruin the lie Jac: rude Jac: but fine Jac: guess you don't owe me Amelia: no, I don't Jac: enjoy your coffee then Amelia: it'll taste disgusting like it always does Amelia: the biggest lie of all Jac: you aren't as exhausted and sad as you say you are Jac: the taste would've been acquired by now, you massive child Amelia: I've had to hide it longer than you Amelia: I'm just more skilled and hilarious Jac: so you're better at being sad? Jac: and I love a competition 🙄 Amelia: 😏 Amelia: I've acquired a taste for anything with a high enough alcohol content, there you go Jac: I was drunk before I got there and that was still apparent Amelia: haven't needed stitches yet Jac: that's something Jac: anyway, how'd you figure you've had to hide it longer? Amelia: because I have Amelia: you were sitting pretty on a ☁ with Savannah for ages Amelia: nothing could touch you up there Jac: that's where you're wrong Amelia: I'm not letting you win again Jac: 😏 Jac: it's not like I was fucking boys because I thought I wanted to Amelia: okay 🏆 no need to make me cry thinking about that Jac: they aren't that bad Jac: well, usually Jac: just not as interesting, it didn't make sense Jac: why we would waste time we could be together instead Amelia: it's really sad Amelia: as 💔 it was seeing you with lads, I thought it was at least what you wanted Jac: they aren't the ones that made me 💔 Amelia: I know but Amelia: I can't imagine doing that, or how it would make me feel if I thought I had to Jac: well you're much softer than I am Amelia: excuse me, it took you years to break me, Savannah did the same to you in 1 Amelia: you're not that hard Jac: I think that says more about Savannah than it does you Jac: but alright Amelia: right, because she's so perfect Amelia: I actually can't compete Jac: shut up Amelia: it's true Jac: it isn't that simple, I keep saying Amelia: it's as simple as you've already said, she's straight and I'm not Amelia: it was safer for you, except it wasn't Jac: you make it sound Jac: ugh Amelia: isn't it? Jac: you think I'm a right cold, calculating bitch Jac: and I'm not saying you're wrong but it was nice when you thought otherwise Amelia: we can't go back, you really drilled that into me Jac: I know Jac: oh well Amelia: oh well? that's the best you can do, yeah? Amelia: doesn't sound very calculating and well planned out Jac: because it's all over Jac: the only thing I've got left is uni and the career I want Jac: nothing else can or is going to exist Amelia: that's more than I've got Amelia: I haven't exactly been concentrating on my app Jac: well you're going to run away and find your Thelma aren't you Amelia: you ruined that fantasy with reality Jac: yeah right Jac: you're still a hopeless romantic Amelia: with a 🚗 I can't drive yet Jac: have you had any lessons yet Amelia: no Amelia: I keep asking my dad but he's always too busy Jac: go ask him now Amelia: I've drank too much to go now Jac: well duh but he'll feel so bad for you he'll make time tomorrow or whatever Amelia: and we're back to calculating Jac: someone has to if you wanna be wild and free Amelia: 😂 Jac: how early is it Jac: will the library be open Amelia: it's weird that the library is still open at any hour Amelia: you're literally the only person who ever goes there Jac: excuse me, only child Jac: you try and study with a house full of annoying kids and dogs Amelia: I'm fine with a 🏠 swap, I don't feel like studying Jac: yeah only if you make it permanent Amelia: you wouldn't take my guest room for a night, I don't think I'd be able to make that happen Jac: because you were there Amelia: rude Jac: sensible Amelia: nothing's going to happen Jac: yeah exactly Amelia: what does that mean? Jac: it means we aren't going to be friends Amelia: why not? Jac: I told you why Amelia: I'm not asking you to care about me, I'm saying I'm here for you Jac: No Jac: I wasn't joking when I said I can't have friends Amelia: I know you weren't Jac: that includes you Jac: especially you Amelia: okay Jac: okay Amelia: good morning then Jac: 👋
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hannie-dul-set · 5 years
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(thirteen times) i love you— 01
— wherein y/n (a hopeless romantic) seems to fall in love with nearly ever guy she meets. so, she writes letters for them to compensate. these letters weren’t meant for them to read, but what happens when they all end up receiving them?
01 // the day it all went down
word count: 4.3k
a/n: the first part is finally here!! heheh. be warned that this is nothing but an absolute shitfest rip HAHHAH please lmk what you thought about this part!!
part 2 will be on July 9th, 8:00 PM EST!
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The soft breeze hits your skin as you walk down the dusty pavement. Clutching your books to your chest, you let out a long breath. Yet another agonizingly long day at school, I guess.
Your pace begins to slow down the moment your temporary prison appears into your field of vision. It wasn't as if you hated school— what you hated was going through the same mundane pattern nearly every single damn day to the point that it could bring a person to the brink of insanity. If that hadn't happened before, then you surely will be the first.
"Y/N! It's good to see that you're alive!" A chipper voice (thankfully) interrupts your blaring thoughts.
You groaned, "How the fuck is that a good thing, Hyerim? If anything, my impending death might actually be what the world needs right now."
"And how exactly would your death contribute to helping the earth?" Hyerim rolled her eyes, adjusting the strap of her bag as the both of you entered the campus.
A few acquaintances greeted the both of you while you passed the corridors. "Is Jiyeon not here yet?" You questioned, brushing a stray hair behind your ear.
"Said she's gonna be late," Hyerim shrugged, "And you still haven't answered my question, missy."
With a sigh, you divert your attention towards your locker which is a few feet away from you. Your eyes narrow. What the fuck? You continue to squint at the object— or more like the person leaning against it, whom which you assumed is waiting for you for god knows whatever reason.
"Hellooo? Y/N, you okay?" a waving hand blocks your vision. You turned to your friend who's giving you a worried look.
"I'm fine, I'm fine," you assured her. Hopefully. You glance back at the male who was still in the same spot as before, but this time, he seemed to have noticed you. For fucks sake, go away! Oh lord jesus, am I in trouble? You gulped and looked back to your friend.
"Hey, I gotta go. I'll see you later," you bid her goodbye, walking past her "And to answer your question— overpopulation."
You heard small 'what the fuck' from your friend before you had finally left her presence, causing small grin to form in your face. Although, your brief moment of joy was cut short once you remembered the apparent doom that was waiting for you at your locker.
You made your way towards the man. With every step you take, your heart races further and a new thought of dread plants itself in your mind.
What does he want from me?! As far as I know, I haven't done anything wrong! But why else would he be here? Wait, what if I actually did something that I don't know of? Jesus— okay, relax Y/N, it probably won't be that bad. Oh god, never mind, he doesn't look happy. You know what, my death would really, really, really sound nice right now. Maybe if i just jump—
"Oh. There you are, Y/N. I've been waiting for you for quite some time now."
Lord, please take me.
"May I know why, Seungcheol?" you look up to meet his eyes, features remaining calm in the hopes of masking the internal turmoil that's going on in your head.
It takes him a while to respond. He bites his bottom lip, eyes wandering in every direction besides you. Based on his actions, you could tell he was nervous— that didn't exactly sit well with you. Why the hell is mister student council president waiting for you, and not to mention he's nervous? The last interaction you've had with him was literally months ago. None of your thoughts seemed to line up, so all you could do was just to anxiously wait for his response.
He let out a deep breath, "Look, Y/N, I'm really flattered that you like me and—"
Your brows furrowed. What?
"—and I appreciate the fact that you think I'm handsome and all—"
The hell is he saying?
"—but you know I have a girlfriend and I really don't think she'll —"
"Seungcheol, what are you talking about?" you cut him off, your face filled with confusion.
You see him pressing his lips together. He reaches his hand into his pocket and takes out something from it.
A look of horror shrouds your face upon seeing the familiar object. Your eyes widen and you could feel your breathing starting to become erratic.
Oh my god no no no, please, for the love of god, don't tell me—
"I got your letter, Y/N," a yellow envelope appears in his hand, "I'm really sorry, I really do appreciate the sentiment but I don't think Minyoung will be happy if she sees— wait, Y/N, are you okay?"
You shake you head, hyperventilating. Your eyes still focused on the dreaded envelope in Seungcheol's hand. This can't be happening, this cannot be happening.
Seungcheol's hands meet your shoulders, "Hey, do you want me to take you to the infirmary?" he looks at you, eyes filled with worry.
"I'll— I'll be fine, y-yeah, I'm okay—"
You freeze.
"No, you're obviously not fine, Y/N. I'm taking you to the infirmary."
What if the rest has theirs?
"I— I have to go—" you shake his hands off of you and you ran off, leaving a confused and rather bewildered Seungcheol behind.
As you raced through the halls, all of the students that you came across seemed to be giving you worried glance. They probably thought you were having a breakdown— which in fact, you are (surprise.) You must've looked absolutely terrible for them to even notice. You had no idea where you were headed— anywhere where you could lose your mind without anyone seeing would be nice. You take a swift turn, but instead of moving forward, you were stopped back a rather broad and muscular chest.
"Oh damn, you alright there, Y/N?" you slowly look up and you were met by the face you someone you really didn't want to see.
"Earth to, Y/N? Have you lost the ability to speak or maybe I've just rendered you speechless?" you nearly slapped the shameless grin on the man's face, but you remained still.
"Or maybe she just doesn't want to talk to you, Gyu."
You snap your head to the direction of the voice. Your face contorting in horror upon seeing him. Any moment now, death.
Kim Mingyu and Xu Minghao. Whatever higher being there is from above must be enjoying the shit show that your life is slowly becoming into.
You let out a small shriek as you scrambled away from the both of them.
"Okay I knew she didn't like me, but that was just rude."
Quickening your pace, you dashed your way to the back of the school. It was almost time for your first class, but all you wanted to do was just to sit down, cry, and wallow yourself in self-pity.
The doors of heaven made its way into your peripheral vision and you swear you were about to burst into tears of joy. You let out a breath and a smile of relief plastered itself on your face.
But of course, your moment of bliss just had to be cut short.
"Y/N."
You felt someone grab your arm and you let out a squeak. You'd recognize that voice anywhere.
"Sorry, it's just that I read your letter and I—"
"I, uh, I can't talk right now, Seokmin. Gotta go, bye—" for the third time today, (and possibly more to come) you ran.
It seemed like the back of the school wasn't an option to have your breakdown, anymore. You continue on running until your legs brought you in front of the infirmary. Good enough, you thought to yourself.
You tried to catch your breath as you entered the room. From the corner of your eye, you could see a nurse on duty giving you a skeptical look.
"Don't worry," you heaved, "I just— I just need to rest for a bit."
Planting yourself face-down onto one of the nearby beds, you let out a scream. Why the hell is this happening? You were just about to begin sobbing until you heard the door swung open.
"Oh, Joshua. What brings you here, sweetie?"
Of course that's gonna happen. What did I fucking expect?
You silently thank the people that invented the curtains around medical beds because if it weren't for them, you'd be fucked (more than you already were.) Although, he would still be able to see you if he comes closer and you were not willing to let that happen.
So, like any other person would do, you climbed under the bed.
You could see the nurse's alarmed expression looking at your figure. You placed your index finger on your lips.
'Please, don't tell anyone that I'm in here,' you mouthed, your face brimming with desperation. She seemed to understand your message since she diverted her attention to Joshua.
"Ah, I was just wondering if you hand any pain killers? My head started to ache while I was heading to class."
"Is that so? Just give me a moment, Joshua, I'll go get them."
"Thank you."
A pair of feet appeared in front of you and your heart started to race. You placed your palm on your mouth in case you accidentally slip out a sound.
"Here you go, dear."
"Ah, thank you so much. I'll be going now, Miss Lee."
"Alright. Remember to take care of yourself, Joshua."
The pair of feet shuffle away, causing you to let out the breath that you've been holding back.
"I won't," you heard the door swing open then put immediately to a close.
Slowly, you crawl back out from your hiding spot, hitting your head in the process. But did you care? No, because thank the fucking gods— your ass is saved for now. You stood up and started fixing your clothes and hair (and your mental state, but that's far from redeemable due to today's mishaps.) The bell rang, and you heard a cough coming from behind you. Turning around, you see the nurse looking at you with an unamused expression.
"Before you loiter around any further, I'd have to tell you that you need to get back to class, sweetie," despite the endearment at the end, the tone of her voice is less than endearing; a stark contrast from when she was talking to Joshua, earlier. But then again, he wasn't acting crazy and crawling underneath furniture, so you couldn't really blame her.
You nodded, and without a word, you scurried out of the room.
A groan exited your mouth as you made your way to your first class— chemistry. There weren't much students left in the hallway since the bell had already rung, so you're free to trudge your body around like a zombie. You've reached the door to your class, but before you could open it, you paused.
Fuck.
You curse at yourself.
Junhui is in this class.
Silently letting out a few prayers, you finally opened the door. Two pairs of eyes immediately stared at your direction— you professor, and the devil himself, Junhui.
Jesus, it's like he has been waiting for my arrival or something (guess what: he was.)
"My apologies for being late, sir, I just came from the infirmary," you explain.
"It's fine, Y/N, just go to your seat," you professor brushed you off and you nodded, following his instructions.
The class went on agonizingly slow, but perhaps that was just you hoping for it to end quickly. But, can you really blame yourself when there's literally someone drilling holes at the back of your head the entire god damned time?
Your look at the perpetrator from a few seats behind you, and were met by his intense gaze. You let a barely audible curse slip past your lips and turned your head back to the front. Can he like, stop? You could feel the warmth spreading on your cheeks from the brief interaction. Burying your face in your arms, you could only wait for the saving sound of the bell.
As if it were an ensemble of angels singing— the bell rang.
A bunch of students immediately stood up, you being one of them. You raced towards the door before Junhui could catch up to you. You exited the classroom, but before you could let out a sweet sigh of relief, you felt a hand on your shoulder.
"Hey, Y/N. Is it okay if we talk for a sec?" you paled. No, it is not okay if we talk for a sec— or ever, actually. You turned your head to face him, but before you could utter out an excuse, someone decided to interrupt.
"Sorry, Jun. But I need to borrow Y/N for a while," you thought you were finally saved, but it turns out that your savior would actually end up being your demise, as well.
Wonwoo dragged you away from Junhui without giving him a chance to respond. 
Is this some sort of sick fucking joke?
The tall male finally stopped dragging you and you both ended up in a quiet hallway. You look up at him, trying to formulate a decent excuse in your head since you already anticipated what he has to say.
"Sorry for interrupting you, but I just had to inform you to head to the clubroom after class," Wonwoo explained. "I know I could've just told you there, but you looked like you'd rather die than be that situation— whatever that was."
Huh. You thought. Hasn't he read the letter?
"Anyways, I'll be seeing you later, Y/N," he bade you farewell and left your confused self in the hallway.
You let out a heavy sigh. Thank god you we're saved just now but you know that won't last any longer. Walking at an agonizingly slow pace to your next class, you could only anticipate the next stage of torture that life has planned for you.
You made a quick stop at your locker before heading to class. Letting out a yawn, you opened it and took out everything you need. You weren’t gonna lie, this whole fiasco was starting to make you feel like a dead log . All you wanted was to sleep for ten days (and maybe cry along the way) and wake up knowing this entire thing was just a shitty dream.
You closed (read: slammed) your locker. Turning your heels, you see the presence of another person a couple of feet away from you. You groaned. Can I get a fucking break, please?
At the end of the hallway was Lee Jihoon.
You expected him to march up to you, letter in hand, and gently tell you to fuck off because he isn’t interested. But instead, the moment the male met your eyes, a flustered look crept onto his face along with a not-so-subtle red blush. You heard him mumble a low ’fuck’ before he literally ran away from you as if you had some sort of contagious disease. The tables have turned, apparently.
If you hadn’t been doing the exact same thing during the entirety of the morning, you’d be offended by his actions. You sigh, spending the next few minutes walking to your next class in silence.
Surprisingly, you weren’t late. You took a seat on the second row and waited for the class to start. An uneasy feeling started to flourish in your head. This is weird, you thought. This had been the longest time of peace that had passed before everything inevitably turns to shit again.
Just as the thought enters your mind, the door swings open, revealing none other than Boo Seungkwan.
You grumble, of course this was bound to happen. You prepared yourself for yet another uncomfortable Junhui situation to commence, but it ended up being far more worse than anticipated.
As if the universe slowed down just for this moment, Seungkwan marched towards the desk literally right beside you and, god-forbid, he sat down.
I really wish I were dead, right now.
To make things even more terrible, the male decided to strike up a conversation.
“Morning, Y/N.”
You contemplated grabbing your pen and just stabbing yourself with it, but you didn’t— that would take much too long. Instead, you ended up responding with a small ‘hi,’ which sounded more like a squeak than anything else.
Seungkwan hummed at your response and started fixing his things. You prayed, hoped, and wished that he hadn’t read the letter yet, because god you wouldn’t be able to escape this just like the previous times.
The professor started the class, and the next couple of minutes were spent with him introducing a new lesson.
You assumed your prayers have finally been answered since so far, Seungkwan hadn’t mentioned anything about the letter. You thought you could finally rest easy and focus on the class, but of course, the world decided that you haven’t suffered enough just yet.
“Psst, I was waiting for you to mention the letter you sent me, but it seems like you have zero plans so—”
“Sir, may I go to the restroom!?”
You shot up, cutting off the male beside you and catching the attention of everyone in class. You bit your bottom lip. Clearly, you didn’t think this through, but you didn’t care— you just needed to leave.
“Go ahead, Miss Y/N, and please don’t yell the next time you ask.”
In a rush, you immediately left the room. You weren’t planning on going to the bathroom— for fuck’s sake, you were going home. You didn’t think you could handle the possibility of meeting any more of the recipients of your letters. You were aware you’d have to confront them in the future, but that’s in the fucking future, right now your main agenda is just to cry.
You briskly made your way around the halls, avoiding the handful of people that were around. It was an easy task since people seemed to avoid you the moment you step into their presence. From the corner of your eye, you spot the same dreaded yellow object that had been the root of your ongoing despair. Your breath hitches, bringing you to a halt upon seeing the envelope nestling in Kwon Soonyoung’s grasp.
Taking a deep breath, you hoped to sneak past the male without him noticing you in any possible way. You inched your way past him, taking one step at a time. You were about to take a turn, successfully avoiding the giant landmine that was in the form of Soonyoung, he decided to crush your hopes by looking straight at your direction. His eyes widen, opening his mouth to say something, but you didn’t give the guy a chance—
You ran.
The effect your previous marathons might’ve finally taken a toll on your body since you weren’t running as quickly as before. Your breathing started to become short and even more labored. For the meantime, you decided to stop. You wanted to escape him, not pass out. Leaning against the wall, you pant profusely, you weren’t sure if you would be able to handle this any further— physically and mentally.
You start to move again, although at a much slower pace this time. No matter what happens, you’re going home, only by then you would be able to think about a solution to your problem.
“Y/N! Wait up!”
The blood on your face drains. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck— just fuck. You could hear his footsteps getting nearer and nearer. Adrenaline rushes through your veins and you prepare yourself to start sprinting once again.
Why the fuck is this happening to me?
You sort of wish Seungcheol was just there to reprimand you earlier rather than bringing about this shit storm. It wasn’t his fault by any means, but you couldn’t find anything or anyone else to blame. God, you may have wanted a break from your daily mundane routine but isn’t this a bit too much?
Amidst your rush, a voice brings you to a halt.
“Y/N, what do you think you’re doing?”
You look up to the owner of the voice, mentally spewing out a string of curses (you couldn’t say it to his face unless you wanted to be in even deeper trouble.)
“Aren’t you supposed to be in class? Why the hell are you running around the hallway?”
Jeonghan begins to scold you, although none of it seems to register in your mind. You could only focus on the sound of Soonyoung’s footsteps, who in fact is only seconds away.
“Look, Jeonghan,” you heaved, cutting him off, “I— I’m sort of in— in a situation right now,” you looked at the male in desperation, your breathing still noticeably unstable. You turn your head behind you, seeing the shadow of the male inching closer. “Fuck.”
You faced the male in front of you once again, “Sorry, Jeonghan, but I really— really have to go,” for the umpteenth time today, you ran, but it seemed like Jeonghan didn’t plan on letting you go just yet.
“What the— Y/N, I’m not done with you yet, hold on—”
Instead of one, you now have two males chasing after you. That doesn’t sound too bad if it were in aromantic context, but literally two guys— both of them being exceptionally athletic and fast— are trying to frantically catch you via a running competition. Now that sounds terrible.
Your legs were seriously about to give in— maybe this is a sign to start going to the gym. But due to some miracle (or maybe you were just really fast when desperate), you managed to put some distance between you and the two boys, but you know that wasn’t going to last long. What you need was a hiding place, but where the fuck could you possible hide?
“Yo, Y/N, over here,” you turn your head and see Vernon, who you hoped hasn’t read your letter yet— you probably wouldn’t be able to handle another guy coming for your ass.
Taking the risk, you march up to him, hoping he could help you in some way. He points at his locker and you furrowed your brows in response, how is that supposed to help you?
“Hurry, get in, I’ll tell them you ran off somewhere else,” Vernon ushered you inside the compartment. You gape at him. Were you really gonna let him lock you in his locker in order to get two guys off of your tail? To answer: yes, yes you were.
You struggled to let yourself fit, but although extremely cramped, you managed. From the holes of the locker’s door, you were able to see and hear what was going on outside. A few seconds pass, then Jeonghan and Soonyoung appeared into view.
“Vernon, have you seen Y/N around?” Jeonghan asked, his breath hitching just the slightest bit.
Vernon, for the love of god, please be on my side.
“Yeah, she ran off in that direction,” he pointed towards somewhere you couldn’t see.
“Thanks, man,” Soonyoung replied and the both of them finally disappeared.
You closed your eyes, hoping to find some semblance of peace as you wait for Vernon to release you from the confined space.
“Alright, Y/N, they’re gone,” you heard a click and the locker door creaked open, “You’re safe now.”
Getting out was as much of a struggle as getting in, but once you were fully free, you found refuge on the floor underneath you. You let out as sigh as you leaned against one of the other lockers.
“Hate to ruin your moment, Y/N but why the fuck were they chasing you?” Vernon asked, confusion present in his voice.
You decided to pull yourself up, the male helping you along the way, “It's— It’s a long story,” you managed to utter out. Vernon only looked at you, probably even more perplexed than before. You brush off all the dust and the dirt before taking your leave.
“Thanks a lot, Sol. God, you don’t know how much I owe you for that,” you breathed.
“An explanation would be appreciated,” he chuckled, “But I won’t bug you right now, you look absolutely fucked out.”
You gave him a tired smile in response, “I’ll be going now. See you around,” you wave at him then immediately made your way outside.
The sun hits your skin. You almost cried knowing you finally managed to make it out alive. A few more agonizing minutes until you could have your long awaited breakdown. Surprisingly, the guard by the gate didn’t question why you were leaving school grounds— your postwar appearance probably says everything.
While you were trudging your way home, you felt a buzz in the pocket of your skirt. Letting out a groan, you fish for your phone. A look of dread shrouds your face upon seeing the message. Just when you thought your misery was over.
[chan: y/n we having a tutoring session later right? 👀]
[you: sorry chan, i won’t make it today]
[chan: aw is that so :((( i wanted to talk to you about something
chan: tomorrow then!!!]
You let out an exasperated groan and shoved your phone back into your pocket. Whatever happens within the next few days— you’ll deal with them sooner or later (hopefully, never).
Your house comes into view and you immediately broke into a sprint. Upon reaching your front door, the tears that you’ve been holding back the entire time threaten to break out. A few more seconds, Y/N, you could make it. You opened the door, and after slamming it close, you drop to the floor.
You know you’d have more shit awaiting for you tomorrow, but as of now— you only had the energy to bawl your eyes out, drown yourself in your own misery, and hope for the best to come.
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angellesword · 5 years
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Silver Dust
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Summary: Yoongi proposed to you and you're contemplating whether to say yes or no.
Pairing: Songwriter Yoongi x Gender Neutral Reader
Genre: Fluff, fluff, and fluff.
Word count: 6.7k
Warnings/ author's note: I wrote like a whole ass song using Cypher pt.4 beat lmaooo, kissing, minor smut, mention of rape, abuse, killings, and corruption.
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<<< The first meeting >>>
The first time you met Yoongi's eyes wasn't really that special.
There was no sign of your heart skipping a single beat, if there was, you're 100% sure he's not the reason behind it because 1) you pretty much believed it's just the effect of drinking three shots of espresso in one sitting. 2) You were damn nervous since your prelim grades were already out.
You didn't even feel any butterfly in your stomach, nor did your world light up��and this, to be honest, was understandable, especially when Yoongi's eyes were dead as fuck. You figured that if it wasn't for your shared seven am class, he would probably still be lying in bed.
"The professor said you're my partner for this project." Even the first time you heard his voice wasn't special.
If there's one thing that made Yoongi Yoongi, it's his monotonous voice. At first, you thought he just didn't like the idea that you two were stuck together to work on a project. (Again, it's understandable) You also found it ridiculous that your professor actually paired you with a stranger.
Well, it's not like you knew Yoongi. Unless knowing his full name counted. But really, it's inevitable since the two of you went to the same classes since freshman year (you're a senior now) apart from that, almost all your professors never failed to voice out their adoration for him.
You first heard his name when your history instructor made it very clear that Min Yoongi's works would be his "standard" when it came to grading your individual projects. In short, if Yoongi got an A, you and your classmates should also either get an A or an A+ or else, you're considered 'failed.'
It’s kind of fucked up, really. Most of you knew that Min Yoongi was a monster when it came to collecting As. Unfair. All he did during class lectures was sleep and yet, he still managed to be number one.
Huh. It must be awesome to be God's favorite.
There was also this one time when one of your professors, Mr. Bang, cried when he asked Yoongi to read his essay in front. The smart boy was reluctant at first. He despised exposure, that's for sure. However, the professor's so persistent that Yoongi obliged just to make the annoying instructor shut up.
You're actually glad Mr. Bang managed to persuade Yoongi. His speech about finding yourself and being happy made Mr. Bang and almost everyone in your class cry. Yoongi transformed into a completely different person the moment he started his speech. Monotonous Voice? Gone.
You figured that yes, your heart didn't skip a beat when you first caught his eyes, but boy did your heart hurt when those simple words leaving his mouth turned into a piece of art.
<<< Your one brain cell >>>>
The second time you met Yoongi's eyes was in front of his house. The two of you decided to work on your project at the school's library, however the place was loaded with students cramming their paper works and you just couldn't bear to hear another person aggressively typing on their laptop anymore. You were sick of it.
"Uh, hi?" you awkwardly smiled at the blond man in front of you.
You weren't quite sure how to react when he was just staring at you blankly. Yoongi's lips were pursed together and that alone made you uncomfortable.
"We were supposed to meet at the library..." He raised his brow as if he wanted to know how the hell did you know where he lives? And were you a fucking stalker?
"I..." You instantly trailed off when he narrowed his brow more. Man, he sure was intimidating. The lack of spark in his eyes made you wince. The man in front of you had thick, low set brows—making them appear almost completely straight. (Poker face alert)
You swallowed the thick lump in your throat before trying to form a coherent sentence.
"There...people. I mean, the library is packed with uh, people."
"So you just decided to show up in my house?"
His question made you quiver. This was such a wrong move. Of course you couldn’t just knock on his door like this; you two were not even friends!
"I'm sorry. I just didn't know any other place and I..." You heaved a deep sigh. "I saw your friend Jeongguk and he told me where you live—“
"Right." He cut you off by opening the door wide. Of course it had to be Jeongguk. That little shit really knew how to annoy Yoongi.
"Holly peed on the couch so there's no way we can work there. Is my room okay to you?" Despite not seeing his face, you instantly knew that Yoongi's question was directed at you. He was leading the way inside his house and you're behind him, quietly following where he's going.
Yoongi's house was not that big, but it's a lovely and comfortable place. Unlike your dorm, you felt at home here. It's probably the indoor plants that made the place more alive. You suddenly wondered if he's living with someone. Did the love of his life stay here? Or did he have a roommate? You're adamant that he lived alone; otherwise all these plants would probably be dead.
You weren't really a judgmental person, you're rather logical. Yoongi slept during class hours; he couldn't be bothered by moving a single inch, too. You guessed that he hated any form of activity and maybe, that included watering plants.
You were about to ask him if he lived alone when your voice had been overpowered by loud, boisterous bark.
"Oh! Hello there, little guy..." A giggle escaped from your lips when a small dog went your way to lick your exposed legs.
You squatted in front of the puppy so you could pet his furry head.
"Holly, no!" Yoongi called the attention of the brown poodle, but it couldn't care less. The dog named Holly still continued to ask for your affection.
"Holly!"
You almost whined when Yoongi took Holly away from you. You're sure the puppy hated it too. But Yoongi told you that his pet needed to learn his lesson first. The naughty dog really peed on the couch right after his bathroom training. Yikes!
Yoongi let you inside his room after your little encounter with Holly. The vibe of his room contradicted the overall theme of the house, but you had expected it to be this way nonetheless.
His bedroom walls were painted dark blue, too dark it's almost close to black. There's nothing much in his room except a single bed, a study area with lots of technical devices, and oh!
Amusement danced in your eyes when you noticed different manga books on his shelf. You didn't think that Yoongi was the type of person who would dwell on such things, but what really caught your attention was his album collection.
"You like Epik High!?" you couldn't help your enthusiasm when your eyes found the band's album called Shoebox resting on the black metallic shelf near his bed. Damn. Shoebox was your best-loved album of all time! You liked all songs by Epik High, however nothing could ever top the said album for you. Your ultimate favorite song had to be Amor Fatti. That song slapped, though its meaning was often misunderstood by many.
Yoongi only spared you a few glances from the moment you showed into his house, this time, however, he was looking at you intently and for the first time, you saw him smile, a shy one at that.
"Yeah...they're the reason why I write songs..." He whispered, too soft you barely heard it.
You even blinked. Did you hear him right?
"Oh, you're a songwriter?" You flashed a loop-sided smile that made Yoongi's cheeks red.
"Uh, well...it's just what I like to do during my free time."
You nodded and hummed, your eyes were still busy roaming around his room when an idea popped in your mind.
"So why don't we make use of your talent and write a song for this project?" You caught Yoongi's eyes again, but this time, it didn't look dead, truthfully, his pupils dilated when he heard what you just said.
You instantly defended your suggestion.
"I mean, we don't really have a plan, and now we have. I think you're pretty good at it so it'll make our jobs easier. I can sing, don't worry..."
You hated saying that, though you didn't have a choice. You needed to convince him that producing a song would be such a good idea.
Your professor said you needed to make something, anything that would elicit a reaction from him and your classmates. This was a psychology class and your topic for midterm was all about emotions. Mr. Kim Seokjin, your professor, was tired of doing all the talking, especially because your class was unresponsive, so to save his voice (and brain cells probably) he told the whole class that the remaining meeting for midterm would be about his students showcasing their talents that wold, like what you had said, gain extreme emotions from your classmates. It's actually easy except that you're paired with someone you were not close with. On top of that, the presentation of the project shouldn't exceed ten minutes, and lastly, it should be personal.
You spent days thinking about what you and your partner could do, but your brain cells weren't cooperating since you only had two of it, the first one was sleeping and the other only knew the words "Nothing, bitch."
And so now that your former brain cell decided to wake up and save you from your misery of being stupid (even if it's just for good three minutes) you're willing to take it.
Before your 180 seconds ran out, you immediately started blabbing words to convince Yoongi to produce a song with you.
And guess what? Your convincing power must be really good (or maybe you're just as annoying as Mr. Bang and Yoongi just wanted you to shut up too) but hey, at least Yoongi agreed!
<<< Weirdo >>>
The third time you met Yoongi's eyes—well, it's not really the third time. You had actually lost count on how many times your eyes locked with each other. Sometimes, it's a conscious act, but most of the time, it's not. You guys would just find yourselves staring into each other's eyes when you didn't know what lyrics to write next.
Producing a song was not as easy as what you thought it would be. It had been three weeks since the two of you started this project. Yoongi's room had been your workplace ever since. He had the equipment you needed plus it's easier to meet here since your dorm was just meters away from his house.
"My damn throat hurts like hell!" You groaned before collapsing on top of Yoongi's bed.
The past three weeks you spent with Yoongi made the two of you start a beautiful friendship. Admittedly, it's not really beautiful since most of the time; you're bickering at each other. You and Yoongi were so different from each other. He liked starting his work early because he wanted to finish it early. You, on the other hand, were his exact opposite. You're the play now, work later type of person and Yoongi hated it so much. While he practiced delayed gratification, you sat there and ruined everything.
You were always on his bed, cuddling his pet Holly. That's most likely the reason why it's only been two days since you two finished the song. It took almost three weeks because of your procrastinating ass, and now, you suffered. The two of you only had a week before you performed this in front of your class. Yoongi was pissed off at you for the reason that you still hadn't finished memorizing the lyrics and your voice was already strained.
“If I ever see you drinking cold water again, I will fucking drown your ass on that water as I behead you, and then I will freeze your head." Yoongi warned as he joined you in bed.
"Ohhh, morbid. I like that..." You shrugged your shoulders and then you buried your face on his chest—making him groan in irritation.
"You weirdo, get away from me!"
"No..." You laughed because Yoongi was the weird one here. He told you not to touch him or stay close to him, but at the same time, he's wrapping his arm on your waist.
You wondered if this was okay, it's just been three weeks since the two of you had been formally introduced, and yet, you found comfort here. On his bed. In his arms.
You smiled to yourself, yes, Yoongi was a weirdo, but so were you.
<<< Namjoon’s Party >>>>
What you considered as the fourth time you met Yoongi’s eyes was also the first time he called you by your given name.
“You feel so good…” He moaned your name on your neck, his hands were tightly wrapped around your waist—enjoying your body heat.
You suddenly thought if dragging Yoongi into this party was the best idea. Right now, you had no freaking clue how to act. You’re drunk, but not too drunk to not think about the consequences of this night. But damn, you’re just a human. A horny human! How could you possibly stop Yoongi when he’s using his soft lips to paint bruises on your neck!?
You could just push him away and you knew that, though you were also aware that your mind and heart wouldn’t want that, not when you liked what he’s doing to you.
“Namjoon’s party sucks.”
“Just not your crowd, weirdo...” You chuckled. Oh, thank heavens for Namjoon. He was one of your childhood friends and frankly, the song you and Yoongi produced wouldn’t be finished without the help of Namjoon. So when that friend of yours texted you to come to his birthday party, you immediately agreed. Fortunately, you didn’t have to force your one brain cell to wake up just so you could convince Yoongi to go with you.
This wasn’t what Yoongi likesd he hated parties because he didn’t want to talk to stupid people and drunken people were stupid people. Perhaps the only reason why Yoongi was here was because he couldn’t turn down Namjoon—not after all your friend’s genius advice.
“I hate this place.” Yoongi added, he’s now looking at you with sparks in his eyes—or maybe you’re just drunk. Too intoxicated to feel and see anything other than the fact that Yoongi’s already grinding at you.
You huffed; suddenly offended by the clothes you’re wearing. Were you supposed to wear this when all you wanted was to feel Yoongi’s touch on your bare skin?
“We’re here for Namjoon—”
“God, can’t you take the hint?” Yoongi cut you off by pouting.
You blinked. Did this weirdo just pout? And oh, his lips…his lips were hot….hot against your own mouth.
“Yoongi….” You breathed, your eyes were too hazy to see his gummy smile.
“Let’s get the hell out of this place…”
That night, you once again lost count as to how many times you met his eyes. You also figured out that his eyes looked best the most when he’s down on his knees, facing your hips.
<<< The Performance >>>
You were expecting to meet Yoongi’s eyes as soon as you opened your very own one; however panic and fear consumed your whole being that you immediately ran out of Yoongi’s room. You’re too frightened to let him see you that you hurriedly put your clothes on and left his house.
It’s not like it was going to change the fact that you slept with your classmate in Psychology, however, you were scared. Scared to see his eyes back to being dead when just last night, the moon and the stars were there, staring at you like you’re not just a dust in this universe, but the whole universe.
Besides, you had one logical reason: you needed to pick up your costume for your upcoming performance with Yoongi. Taehyung, your designer friend was only available till nine in the morning, so you literally had to run like a lunatic right after you woke up from your cozy sleep on Yoongi’s bed.
Your outfit was perfect. Damn, Taehyung really had a talent when it came to this. Your confidence level was boosted just by wearing the clothes your great friend designed. You thought you’re finally ready to perform the song you and Yoongi produced for one month.
You were so ready, but your heart was not…
Just…where the hell was Yoongi? It had been two days since you last saw him. You hadn’t heard any news from him since you left his apartment the day after Namjoon’s party. Was he mad at you for leaving? Or did he even care?
You had fifteen minutes left before Mr. Kim Seokjin, your psychology professor, marked your grades zero.
“Fucking Min Yoongi, where the hell are you?” You grimaced when your call was directed on his phone’s voicemail.
You had two options: fake death so you wouldn’t have to perform, or kill Mr. Kim Seokjin. (They wouldn’t probably notice if you stabbed your professor on his side since most of them were busy preparing for their own presentations.)
But just as you’re about to resort to your latter option, Yoongi’s familiar scent immediately attacked your nose. You looked back only for you to cancel killing Mr. Kim Seokjin and just choose your former option.
God, how could it be possible for you to still want to stay alive when Min Yoongi was killing you with his looks? Gone was his light blond hair, but you’re not complaining since his now black curly hair was much much better than the previous one.
“Sorry I’m late. Holly peed on the couch again…” His multiple earrings looked too damn good on him. You’re silly; you’re fucking silly because you worried for nothing. Yoongi was still Yoongi, and the sparks in his eyes were still visible.
“It’s okay, we still have time…” You smiled as if the thought of murdering your professor didn’t just cross your mind. Oh well, nothing else mattered when Yoongi was here, right?
Mr. Kim Seokjin said that you and Yoongi would be the last performers for this day, which meant you still had at least half an hour left to stare at Yoongi like a vampire wanting to drink blood. But time flies fast when you’re busy with something. Thirty minutes ago, you were just ogling at your partner, right now, you were in front of the class, spitting fire with your partner.
The first verse of your produced song was rapped by Yoongi. Scratch that, Agust D was in front of you and not Yoongi. Your partner told you that he preferred to be called Agust D whenever he was performing his rap song.
Robber! Robber!
Sorry bae
Killer! Killer!
Sorry bae
Addiction—diction--diction
Sorry bae
“Oh! The court’s case you got away?”
Your partner smirked before proceeding to the next verse. You, on the other hand, stood there to hype the crowd.
You always get away
I’m sorry bae
You smoke cocaine but get away
Justice won’t be served
I’m sorry bae
Everything, everything, everything
Unfair
You were nervous. The next verse was assigned to you. The plan was that you only had to sing the chorus part, though Yoongi had another idea. He wanted you to go out of your comfort zone and try something new. So here you were, rapping.
You commit the same sin
Sorry bae
Your silence they love it
Sorry bae
I see same pigs on the senate
Boring bae
Your vote they bought and they’re not
Sorry bae
Nothing’s new but rich people’s car are
Brand new
Sorry bae
You can’t be illiterate coz they take advantage
Before you know it, you’re one of the reasons
Why innocents are salvage
Politicians know your name
But after the election they act like they don’t know your name!
You and Yoongi both performed the chorus part. It looked like the crowd was enjoying your presentation because they also started shouting and hyping you up.
They love, they love, they love themselves
They know, they know your sufferings
But they don’t they don’t and will never care
Youth wake up, stand up, we should fight the state! Brr!
The following verse was rapped by Yoongi again. You took your time to feel yourself as you discreetly watched the reaction of the people in front of you. A whole month of stress and worry seemed to pay off. You even locked eyes with Park Jimin, one of your most-respected classmates; he cheered for you and that was enough for you to successfully perform the next verse.
I wanna get job (job, job, job)
But I can’t get on the spotlight
Yeah I wanna have a good life!
But my parent’s wings are cozy
I just wanna hide
It’s okay I have time
My trust fund won’t end
So I can still live
And breathe while I finish this game
Called being “dependent”
All night, all day
All night, all day
Don’t care, don’t care, don’t care!
The next verse was easy to execute since you and Yoongi both rapped it. You were facing each other and suddenly, you forgot that there were eyes watching you. Min Yoongi caressed your cheeks once. You smiled as you sensually rolled your body.
Who plays by the rule?
No one!
Who wants to grab a woman's hair?
Husband!
Yoongi slightly pulled your hair this time. You grimaced, but you still continued rapping.
He has mistress so the wife’s depressed
He forgot about their kids but that’s okay
She can cover up for him like how
She can cover her bruise and play cool
As she says “I love him, anyway.”
You moved away from your partner. Your mood instantly changed as you approached the next verse. This one’s challenging to write. Your heart was breaking as you sang.
The other woman on the street has been pulled
By the stranger claiming she’s wet like a pool
She should be thankful since this will feel like
a dream come true
Lick it lick it right, you can take it, right?
She cried and cried and cried, that should be a sign
But “High five!” he told the other man
As the woman cried, her voice is too loud
So they killed her that night.
You let out your frustration by growling and jumping. Min Yoongi was also lost in his own world as he rapped—raising his middle finger from time to time.
They love, they love, they love themselves
They know, they know your sufferings
But they don’t they don’t and will never care
You’re horny, you fucked up! Go on and hate yourself! Brr!
It’s Yoongi’s own verse again. His mood shifted too. If you weren’t part of this performance, you would probably just stare at him. Goddamn, Min Yoongi had his own way of expressing himself.
Back back to the killings!
Your guns check
Call me when you need a gunman I can kill
Even for a dollar
Hashtag no conscience
I don’t believe in God so hell sounds okay
I’ll be with my gang gang
So hell won’t be boring!
The demon you summon
so money won’t be your worry
Payday, paycheck so I can have that rolex
He pointed the rolex on his wrist. It’s not an authentic one, but that’s not the point. Clearly, he just wanted everyone to see that there were other ways to “look cool.” However, many people still chose to listen and be their own demons.
Click clack to the bang bang
Your time has run out.
Click clack here’s my gun
I’m so high on drugs
I see you as a rat
They can control me with money
So you take these four shots
Your life is like a fruit fly
“I can’t understand. Why is it so easy for them?” This was Min Yoongi’s question to you. He asked this while you two were writing the following verse. He hated a lot of things, though he could forgive and tolerate some of it easily. However, he clearly told you that he could never treat someone right if that person used violence.
Click clack to the bang, you and you
Wait your turn
Shit! You little boy
Come here look at the blood
How? You’re asking me?
I don’t know, you’re a man you should know how
He also told you how much he hated this unfair world. He respected women more than ever, but Yoongi was an advocate of both equality and equity. Why can’t boys cry? Are we robots? These were some of his questions too.
If this is the kind of world we live in
I don't wanna live at all
If I exist for your pleasure
then I refuse to accept this call
You joined Yoongi singing the last verse of the song.
They love, they love, they love themselves
They know, they know your sufferings
But they don’t they don’t and will never care
Yo’ human, are you human? If yes then help us save this place!
By the time you finish the song, everyone’s clapping their hands and cheering for you and your partner. You swore you even saw Mr. Kim Seokjin wrote “100” on your paper.
You smiled. The performance was over, contrarily, the attraction you felt for your partner was only starting.
<<< Kimchi and Other Sauces >>>>
The first time you met Yoongi’s pleading eyes was during dinner time. After your performance in Mr. Kim Seokjin’s class, your partner said that the two of you should celebrate this success. Of course you immediately agreed, but that did not mean you were willing to spend money.
“I swear to God, Yoongi…if you ever bring me to a fine-dining restaurant, I will fucking kill you.”
You were not joking. You had student loans to pay so you couldn’t afford to spend a hundred dollar for a fucking spaghetti and sparkling water.
“Chill, you weirdo. We can just—” He stopped mid-sentence because a brilliant idea just popped into his mind.
“What? You’re not planning a yacht dinner date, are you!?” You started freaking out and the uneasiness you felt only intensified when Yoongi smirked.
“Actually, I was planning to…you know…maybe…make you eat my cum.” He simply shrugged his shoulders.
He said it so casually that you just stared at him. Was he serious or were you supposed to be laughing now? You could feel your blood rushing. You were so confused. Excited. Worried.
After what it felt like forever, the staring contest with Yoongi finally ended. He offered his hands and of course, you immediately took it. The both of you rushed toward his big, black motorbike. Yoongi only brought one helmet so he told you to just wear it. The ride to his house wasn’t that far, anyway.
The both of you were in a hurry. Countless profanities were thrown at him for driving hastily; Yoongi even parked his motorbike in a reckless way. Still, you two couldn’t care less, especially Yoongi. How could he? Huh, definitely not after you stroked his cock while driving. That’s really not a smart move, at least not when Yoongi’s mother welcomed the both of you just as Yoongi opened his apartment’s door.
“Eomma! What are you doing here?!” Clearly, your partner wasn’t expecting to see his own mother. It’s pretty obvious since Yoongi’s jaw dropped and his neck was slowly turning red.
“You brat! Why wouldn’t I be here? This is my house!” You knew you weren’t supposed to laugh, however it’s hard to control yourself when Yoongi’s being hit by his own mother while he was trying to cover the bulge on his pants.
“Eommoni! Please! I have a guest!” Yoongi got away from his own mother by hiding himself behind your small frame.
“What—oh!” His mother’s eyes widened when she saw you. She seemed surprised to see Yoongi bring someone. Of course, Yoongi had never brought his friends home. Not even once. At this point, his mother was actually convinced that her son was allergic to human beings.
“I didn’t know that Yoongi is friends with someone as charming as you…” The frightening aura of his mother was completely gone. The older woman engulfed you into a tight, warm hug as she asked your name. You answered her with a smile on your lips.
Yoongi’s mom led you in the kitchen. Actually, you tagged along with her. She wanted to prepare a meal for you and her son, but of course, you couldn’t just sit still and look pretty. As a sign of respect, you needed to help her. Besides, you loved kitchen works, though you’re pretty sure cooking hated every fiber of your being.
The older woman just asked you to set up the table because according to her, she was always in charge of cooking. She also told you to be prepared because you’d surely forget your name once you tasted her award-winning Sam Gae Tang or that chicken soup with ginseng. Hoseok, one of your best friends, made the best chicken soup so your standard was kind of high. For you, nothing could beat Hoseok, but we’ll just have to see.
“Please be kind to my mother…”
Yoongi’s voice and eyes were pleading as he sat beside you. The food was already prepared and the two of you were ready to eat. You were just waiting for Yoongi’s mom to finish washing her hands.
You just raised your brows at the man beside you, clearly not understanding why he’s pleading because really, you knew how to respect elders.
Yoongi sighed.
“My mom is a terrible cook. Her soup tastes like shit, man…” Yoongi shook his head like a traumatized kid. He even bit his lower lip.
You’re about to say something, but you heard his mother’s footsteps, meaning, if you spoke, she might hear you, and so you just kept your mouth shut. You’re expecting Yoongi to do the same, though he just leaned on your shoulders—his eyes were still begging.
“Please, baby? Just put a lot of kimchi and other sauces on your soup to get rid of the awful taste. Can you do that for me?”
You simply nodded. That night, you realized that Yoongi was willing to do everything just to make someone he loved happy. Days, weeks, months, and years passed and you still admired how every time you had dinner with him and his mother, Yoongi would urge you to put kimchi and other sauces on your chicken soup.
At this point, you were convinced you loved Min Yoongi. You had always loved cooking, hell, you were willing to lose your bachelor’s degree if that meant you would be good at cooking, because…
You, just like Yoongi’s mom, were a terrible cook. But Yoongi never complained nor did he ever put kimchi and other sauces on the food you cooked just for him.
<<< Silver Dust>>>>
The first time you asked Yoongi why he liked looking into your eyes was when the both of you were having a staring contest.
The wind was unbelievably cold tonight, clearly, you weren’t expecting to freeze in the middle of a summer night. The annoying weather led you into thinking if climbing on top of your boyfriend’s house’s roof was a good idea. Sure the stars were pretty, but you felt cold. Too cold.
“Do you know the story about the Window and the Mirror?” Yoongi asked out of the blue. He also pulled your body closer to him—making you grimace. The texture of the roof was hard on your back. You shook your head, why did you choose to lay on the roof without any blanket again? Sometimes, your choices in life were really questionable.
“Nah, what happened?” You’re never a fan of stories.
Yoongi sighed. He pulled you closer to him until your face was buried on his neck. Damn. He smelled like smoke and sex.
“Well, for starters, my father left us…”
Yoongi’s words monetarily made you stop breathing. You had known him for years now, but not once did you ever talk about his father. You were aware that his father left him and his mom, though you didn’t know the story behind it.
“My father was a good man and he always tells me he loves my mother more than ever. For the longest time of my life, I believed him. He never looked into anyone’s wife. He never had a mistress, but my father is selfish.”
You just hummed to let him know that you were listening.
He cleared his throat.
“Mom just wants a simple life and that’s why we never left Daegu. This is my home. Our home.” Yoongi’s grip on your shoulder tightened, he looked up in the sky—the stars were prettier when you were in Daegu.
“My father doesn’t like to be here, though. He loves the city. He craves city life. Ever since I was young, he kept telling my mom that they should move to Seoul. Abeonim hates farming. He calls our strawberry farm disgusting. Said he should become a CEO and not a stupid farmer.” Yoongi laughed bitterly. He could still remember the way his father said those words.
“And guess what? He fucking did. Min Hyun Sik, chief executive officer of Bighit Company…” Yoongi cackled and you gasped.
Min Hyun Sik was his father? That guy was like the richest man in South Korea! You wanted to confirm this news that he just dropped, however, you couldn’t move because Yoongi’s grip on your shoulders was so tight.
“He became someone with power by leaving my mother and I.” Yoongi repeated as his eyes darkened. He no longer found the stars pretty. For him they were just lights—shining to hurt his eyes.
“He just left a note like that was going to be enough. He didn’t even say sorry. The only words written on those notes are him telling me to go to University using the money he left.”
You bit your lower lip. His grip was really, really tight…
“He wants me to go to college so I can follow him in the city, and so I went to college. But it’s not because I want to follow him. I enrolled just so I can fucking drop out during my last year.”
You furrowed your brow. If that was Yoongi’s original plan, then how…how come he’s a college graduate now?
“That was the plan before I met you…” Yoongi’s grip on your shoulder loosens, giving you the opportunity to look into his eyes.
He smiled at you.
“So, the story of the Window and the Mirror?” He offered and you just nodded.
“There’s this rich man—”
“Richer than your dad?” You asked. He laughed.
“Fucking richer than my dad…” He left a chaste kiss on your mouth. You giggled. “Anyway, the man went to see a rabbi, some sort of Jewish teacher. Of course the rabbi asked him what he wanted and the rich man said he doesn’t know what to do with his life anymore.”
“Uh, duh? He should give us money!” You butted in again. Yoongi kissed you once more just to make you shut up.
“Unfortunately, the teacher didn’t tell the rich man to give you money, weirdo. The Rabbi just led him over to the window and asked him this.” Yoongi cleared his throat. “What can you see through the glass?”
“And what’s the response of the rich man, Mr. Min?”
“I can see men coming and going and a blind man begging for alms in the street.” Yoongi answered you. “The rabbi seemed content with his answers, so this time, the teacher led him into a large mirror to ask him another question...”
“What is the other question?” You pressed.
“The rabbi asked him this, baby…” Yoongi pressed his lips on your mouth before proceeding to the story. “When you look in this mirror, can you tell me what you see?”
“And?!” You pressed again.
“I can see myself…”
“Obviously.” You rolled your eyes. You just wanted to know the sense of this story.
“And you can’t see the others. Notice that the window and the mirror are both made of the same basic material, glass. You should compare yourself to these two kinds of glass. Poor, you saw other people and felt compassion for them. Rich — covered in silver — you see yourself.”
“Oh,” was all you could say.
Your boyfriend smiled at you.
“My father chose to look in the mirror and I almost did the same. I almost dropped out of college just because I want my father to see that having a degree is useless. But, baby, if I actually chose to drop out, I wouldn’t have met you. I wouldn’t be able to give my mother a better life. I wouldn’t be able to afford to hire a cook and who knows? If I drop out of college, I would probably still be eating my mom’s shitty chicken soup.” You laughed at that.
“I am just saying, I like to look into your eyes because it reminds me of a window. It made me see a lot of things—new opportunities. Because of you, I stopped being selfish. You removed the silver in the mirror; you turned the silver into dust.”
“I fucking love you!” This time, you initiated the kiss.
You kissed Min Yoongi so hard that when you pulled away, he’s desperately gasping for air.
“I fucking love you too.”
<<< The Proposal >>>>
After reminiscing some of your unforgettable moments with Min Yoongi, you finally looked into his eyes.
Yoongi proposed to you and you’re contemplating whether to say yes or no. Your boyfriend despised the crowd, but here he was, down on his knees—shakily holding a ring on his hand.
You examined his face. His lips were quivering, for the first time; you saw how vulnerable he looked. It’s as if his whole life depended on this, and to be honest, it did. Yoongi couldn’t imagine life without you.
“Baby, are you gonna say yes or no?” Yoongi knitted his brows together.
You chuckled. Typical, Yoongi.
“Please stand up…”
Your boyfriend looked at you with confused eyes. His heart started beating so fast he’s very sure it would explode.
“B-But why? Don’t you want to—“ He stammered.
“Just stand up, Yoongi.”
With a heavy heart, Yoongi followed what you wanted. Deep inside, Yoongi was already murdering his friend, Jeon Jeongguk. He just told Yoongi that proposing in a strange, busy city would win your heart.
You two were currently in New York, New York. Strangers were watching you, and Brooklyn Bridge served as your backdrop. Jeongguk said that if Yoongi proposed in a place where no one knew you, then it was a sure win because your mother wouldn’t be able to stop Yoongi. Your childhood crush or ex wouldn't be in the picture too so it was another win for Yoongi. But your boyfriend was starting to regret his decision. He shouldn’t have listened to Jeongguk. What did that dipshit even know about love?
“Yoongi, are you listening?”
“Huh?” Your boyfriend’s train of thoughts were suddenly halted when you spoke.
“I can’t believe you. I just said yes!” You shake Yoongi’s shoulder. It looked like he was still out of his mind and that made you anxious. What if…what if he decided you’re not worth it anymore? What if he didn’t want to marry you anymore?
“Baby, I can’t believe you too. Please give me your hands!” Yoongi exclaimed.
“Oh!” You exclaimed as well. What the hell! You were so apprehensive that you zoned out too!
“We’re both weirdos, do you know that?” Yoongi shook his head after putting the sparkling ring on your finger.
You laughed.
“Oh, just shut up and kiss me.”
“Gladly.”
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