#but they still went we can do better

[oifaaa]

As I begin my umpteenth rewatch of fullmetal alchemist brotherhood I am once again reminded about how amazing it is that this show actually exists in the form that it does like can you imagine if a show like fmab was released today an almost 100% faithful adaptation of the source material not squeezed into 8 or 10 or 12 episode blocks so it can fit a season but given just the right amount of episodes needed to tell the complete story start to end

#fullmetal alchemist #fma #fmab #and i know some people do have issues with the beginning #as they speed it up #and took out some stuff #as theyd already adapted it in the og anime #but i am not one of those people #mostly bc i like the og anime #i think its worth a watch if you haven't already #but yeah just thinking like outside of how amazing the story of fma is #the way it was adapted #even after it was already adapted once #and people liked the og anime at the time #but they still went we can do better #fullmetal alchemsit brotherhood

[cruelsister-moved2]

lets say hypothetically that i wanted men to die and suffer for all time

#which is more than the money made annually by the 50 biggest companies in the world btw #apparently icelandic women went on an unpaid labour strike in the 70s and it brought the whole country to a standstill can we pLEASE bring #this back!! #a;so the countries with the smallest divides #it isnt that the men do more #its countries with better social care etc #WHICH MEANS the gap still exists #just becomes a class AND gender gap #the average USamerican woman spends more than 4h a day doing unpaid work #which is literally like a second job #imagine what u coudl do with an extra four hours in ur day

[aimasup]

sure i COULD ramble about how ai is one of the multiple things that check all the marks of humanity's seven deadly sins but would that be extreme

^^^ possibly insufficiently educated

#the pride the hubris of believing you can do better than innovation and nature by playing god and not in the fun way #the lust it's being used for in so many awful cases #the sloth the way its encouraging everyone to check original sources less before believing anything. Also to not take time to develop skill #the greed its being used for profit without consideration for ethics or fair labour #gluttony. we always have to be faster. shinier. better. no matter if it ends up being less convenient or wonky #the wrath it sows in between people creating more differences to be frustrated over. more hatred #the envy how it takes and takes. always trying to be as clever as the best humans. as beautiful as a real forest or sunset. #do you think the ai wants itself #if this were a scifi movie would we be the bad guys #but this is not a movie and the ai cannot love us. so we cannot love it. and there's that #my post #personal stuff #thinking aloud just silly yapping n jazz 没啥事做就这样咯~ #(￣▽￣)~* #when i was in primary school our textbooks for chinese had short stories and articles to learn about #there was a fictional scifi oneshot about a family in the future going to the zoo #the scifi zoo trip was going great until the zoo's systems went offline for a moment #and it was revealed that all the animals roaming in their enclosures were holograms #the real ones went extinct ages ago #when the computers came back online the holograms returned and there they were #honestly at first I thought it was a bit exaggerating #but I still think about it once in a while

[nientedal]

Usually I just save stuff like this to my drafts until I calm down but you know what, fuck it, I'm done.

Any so-called leftist who refuses to recognize that our options right now are "genocide abroad, progress at home" and "genocide abroad AND genocide at home" and that there is a significant difference between those two options is cordially invited to eat shit and die. We do not have time to entertain your anti-voting hopeless nonsense. A future in which we are able to move towards less death will always be preferable to the one in which we can't, and if you smug, sneering little clowns sacrifice that future on the altar of your own self-righteousness because you're too high on your own farts to realize how far up your own ass you are, I genuinely hope you fucking drown. Specifically, I hope you drown in the blood of the people who will die all over the world as a result of your bizarre refusal to work towards a future that doesn't include ethnic cleansing.

This is the United States. We sell war, here. I don't know how so many of you are only just now figuring that out, but you better get over your shock like yesterday because we are out of fucking time. We ran out of time when Reagan took office if not long before. You think not voting will improve any of this?

Keep calling, keep writing, keep screaming. Governments everywhere are (slowly) beginning to listen. Democrats are (slowly) beginning to listen. But Republicans never will, and if they seize power again next year (which they will absolutely do their damned to attempt), everything will be so, so much worse for everyone, everywhere. The work is slow and painful and imperfect but it will only get done if we show up and do the work, so keep calling, keep writing, keep screaming-- and when the time comes, you show up and vote for the future that lets us build a better tomorrow instead of just choking to death in the steaming shitpile of today.

#''i can't have No Genocide tomorrow!!! so i don't want No Genocide at all!!! WAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH'' that's you. that's how you sound #''if i can't have perfect then don't even fucking bother with better!! just give me worse instead!!'' are you for fucking real #you don't care about Palestine you don't care about anything other than being able to go ''Well. at least I didn't choose this.'' #not choosing is still a choice! you stupid motherfucker! #choosing to stand at the lever and do nothing and watch the trolley crush five people is still a choice!! #how DARE you act like that blood is not on your hands! #again: THIS IS THE UNITED STATES. WE SELL WAR HERE. #not voting for Biden is not going to help Palestine! #in fact it will absolutely measurably make the situation WORSE! #for them AND everyone else! #this is the reality we are working with and if you want it to change then you HAVE to play the long game! #leftists heard ''don't let perfect be the enemy of good'' and went ''WHAT THE *FUCK* DO YOU MEAN I CAN'T HAVE PERFECT??! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA'' #and i have fucking had it! #all i can do is try to keep working towards a day when the current left is the farthest right we have #but we are never gonna get there if y'all don't wake the fuck up and get moving #us politics #vent post #so help me god if this turns into a game of Spot the Tankie in the notes i'm gonna start knifing people

[jade-len]

luo binghe better than me fr i think i would've gone fucking apeshit if the person i loved with my entire soul pretty much said "fuck you" because of my race and pushed me down into literal hell for me to suffer for years

i've said it before and i'll say it again, i really don't think we give binghe enough credit. that man was on concerning levels of forgiving all the way from the start

#this would all be without xin mo eating at my brain btw #were the things he did wrong? of course. can you blame him? absolutely not. #like lets not act like at least half of us wouldnt go insane #i would be devastated #just.. place urself in his shoes ok #like he was able to still change for the better despite all the shit he went through #able to realize his wrongdoings and make up for them #thats fucking amazing and we should not discredit him ok #my ass would probably do the same thing as him tbh. or have a whole mental breakdown. or both #also same goes for bingge i wouldve done the same shit too probably. id fuck shen jiu up #again #not excusing his actions but i feel like people seem to focus on that part of him way too much when we literally see his character growth #and yeah hes still just a little unhinged but arent we all #hell some people are WAY more fucked up than binghe and they didnt even go through #i love him so much can you tell #so anyways yes if he were real i would date him hes so relatable #because then id now that he would actually change for the better and make things up and learn from his mistakes #yeah haha yes hes a red flag whatever all jokes and fun but are we just gonna ignore his development??? #im not a binghe apologist. maybe. #svsss #mxtx svsss #luo binghe #luo bingmei

[lornasaurusrex]

I miss you Lorna… this is such a mess

This is an old message and I had several other similar messages, but I miss you guys and hope you’re all doing well!! I’m sorry to see nothing has improved.

I saw I was kindly mentioned by @awesomefringey and some other commenters the other day, so just wanted to log in and say hello and log back out for a few more months. 💕

Sending so so much love to all of you. Take care of yourselves and each other, please.

The video is still on YT.

#Anywayyyyy #The fandom added a whole lot more C to my C-PTSD #So a nice random message every few months instead of a freshly posted death wish is LOVELY. #Don’t fret. On meds and therapied but fresh tf out of money from it so @ L and H… lornasaurusrexx at g*ail is the PayPal if ur bored 🙃 #I hate to be like this but protect your hearts. They’ll never be able to look out for you guys and they feed these trolls ammo for snacks #and it seems to have only gotten worse. Gotta keep them hets hetbaited for their money whilst actively encouraging them to bully yall? Why? #STILL!? At this point it feels like they’ve both chosen that path deliberately now and I find it quite gross. but I’m also very far removed #So don’t worry about my opinions. Keep trusting your own intuition!!! You all see it. I love you guys and your beautiful hearts and empathy #But I hope they can sleep at night knowing the absolute fucking genuine WRECKAGE they left across the Big Gay War generation/era of Larries #Don’t worry guys I’m just as dramatic as ever. None of this has anything to do with them coming out or anything. Just how we were treated. #But trust I fuckin mean that shit from the deepest darkest pit of my Demon Larrie™️ heart. They encouraged this. 🤷🏼‍♀️ #Anyone who cares about my actual life updates: I’m a school nurse now and will be working at a bougie summer camp over break #Had a surgery I needed. Got new tattoos and piercings. In a happy and healthy relationship with the best dude for almost a year now. #OH and I went to New Zealand last year with Prettytruthsandlies!!!! We made a pact back in our Big Gay War/college days to go. And we DID!! #I got overstimulated and overfed and puked in Hobbiton. 🤣 (It was the best time of my LIFE GENUINELY🥰🥰🥰🥰🥹🥹🥹) #Okay BYE LOVE YOU GUYS #There are better and more humane ways to maintain a closet ..like literally STFU entirely. Ignoring it and not exploiting a kid is FREE #🇵🇸

[dawnthefluffyduck]

Free time has (sort of) arrived

(cat is katsrkole on instagram)

#still trying to figure out snouts #shockingly enough I never really drew anthro characters before i found ralsei #see i've actually done quite a lot of larger drawings in my figure drawing class #around 10-12 #but they're all drawings of real people and half of them are unclothed #and i have no interest in posting either of those things here #but just like last semester #the things i'm learning in that class are popping up in my personal drawings #so in a way i'm still kinda sharing a bit of what i've learned this semester? sort of?? #i'm gonna be so damn sad when i don't have this professor anymore #he takes the stress out of model drawing so that we can focus on actually improving instead of just fighting for our grades #and it's working so well for pretty much everyone in the class #i will still likely not be doing any actual drawings any time soon #but if i went any longer without drawing for myself? #i think i was gonna combust #this was actually cathartic i am in a much better mood now #cats #kris #susie #ralsei #deltarune #doodles #okay tag wall finished now i will scroll because i have missed quite a lot lately

[todayisafridaynight]

his boots makea me think of amy

#rgg #ryu ga gotoku #ryu ga gotoku 7 #yakuza series #yakuza like a dragon #yakuza 7 #tianyou zhao #snap sketches #'a lot of zhao posting lately' yeah AND. #i love him.... also he's all i can draw with one arm... #i dared to see if my wrist was better and its almost there... maybe monday ill be truly good #my mom was sus of me when i said my wrist was still banged up #thinkin its Seriously Broken like bro we cant afford a doc visit just to be told to get rest LMAO #anyway. tianyou rose... amy zhao..... #last post put my brain in a zhao mood but i also got recc'd a sadx All Stories speedrun so BASICALLY the stars aligned #'snap what happened to writing' i paced my kitchen for three hours. also the power went out at my house #typing like this SUUUUCCKKS forgive me... #ok bye i told my dad id eat for once so ima do that

[corfisers]

i really need to finish this one day

#one of my fave ideas but i keep getting stuck or starting over. third time's the charm hopefully #anyways. posting it as an excuse to rant because i'm losing my mind over this rn for no reason #incoherent but i just need to Talk or my brain won't shut up #you ever think about how fucked up it is that aoi feels guilty over what happened. i do. i think about her a lot #he can't even look at me. we aren't even blood related but he still had to go to jail because of me. i still love him #in reality none of it is her fault. it shouldn't be about doumeki in the first place. baby girl you were 15 when it happened. #you can say that yashiro is cruel in his dismissiveness (on the surface) of doumeki's trauma but you can see where he's coming from #you got a glimpse of what your sister was going through? of what i went through? and now you're sooo guilty over it? and who does it help? #doumeki's so focused on his own feelings that he ignored aoi when they were living together. “saves” her by pure chance #proceeds to focus on his guilt and ignore her again. if yashiro didn't get involved she'd be sitting in the rain for god knows how long #yet she still loves and to some degree idolizes him #yashiro and aoi both saying that doumeki isn't the type of person to be a yakuza too. doumeki's good doumeki's better than that #and then ch 24 happens. where yashiro says that he's going to throw up and doumeki's response is “i probably won't stop even if you do” #“guess i am like my father after all” and yashiro still goes “you're not. you're pure and im the problem” #(touches doumeki's face. rare gentle gesture. he's gentle afterwards too before leaving. man.) #he's not cruel enough to repeat what he said in the earlier conversation and he doesn't actually believe it anyway #but i wish yashiro was cruel there. it shouldn't have been about doumeki and his feelings. again. #something about yashiro throwing a knife at another person and it flying back at him huh #for all the talk about how doumeki supposedly romanticizes yashiro it really is the other way around. always has been #which is a whole other conversation but yeah. everything about aoi and yashiro in relation to doumeki makes me so fucking sad #but this is also what i mean when i say that aoi doesn't haunt the narrative per se but still has this weird presence? #she's in the parallels. she's in the brief but important mentions. she's in the “your sister was lucky she had you”. #wips tag

[mastersoftheair]

Sorry but am I the only one that thought that episode…sucked? Like it was straight up bad. Horrible pacing, no wrap up of all the random characters and plot lines they’ve thrown around all season (the tuskegee airmen, Westgates spying, literally all the guys beside like the main 4). (Seriously it makes me so mad that the three redtails got all of 5 seconds of screen time, almost no lines. Literally what was the point of introducing them other than to pretend the show was iNcLuSiVe) Even at the end of BoB and the Pacific you get a much better idea of what happened to all the remaining guys. In this they’re like what happened to DeMarco or Hambone or Brady or (insert character here) we don’t know! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ The concentration camp scene felt shoehorned in compared to how it was done in BoB. Unless that actually happened to Rosie (which i haven’t heard anything about) but it was just like.. ok? It all felt so rushed and emotionless to me. Maybe I’ve just fallen out of love with MoTA but it’s been downhill for me since episode 6 or so.

i already made a little (read: long) post-finale write-up here, where i talk about the use of the tuskegee airmen, l'sandra, and overall editing/pacing issues i felt the show had. but i don't agree with the notion that adding the redtails was in any way insincere or trying to halfass being "iNcLuSiVe", i just think they suffer from this show's obvious time constraints. and to summarize what i wrote in my linked post, there's a limit to what white writers/directors/producers can do when creating a story about black people. there are some stories i'd feel uncomfortable with them telling on their own, truth be told. dee rees wasn't the sole nonwhite director, but she Was the only black one. i think she did her job well given the limitations and i appreciate that they let her direct those episodes, rather than leaving it up to a team of white people trying their best to tell a black story.

the worst i can say about the finale is that it didn't feel like That strong of finale, tho i wouldn't go as far to say it "sucked" or call it "straight up bad". i liked it plenty, it's just the weakest of the hbo war finales imo.

as for the concentration camp scene, artistic license was taken with both shows. unlike what's seen in the BoB, easy company wasn't the first to arrive at kaufering, and there's 0 mention of the all-japanese american 552nd who helped them liberate it). similarly, rosie rosenthal did assist in liberating those camps, though it would've been after the events shown this episode. idk if he saw one in that up-close way seen in this episode, but he could've (i should research this when i have time). plus, it would've felt weird Not having him acknowledge them at all. "shoe-horned" is an odd term to use here imo, as both scenes more-or-less center a jewish character (BoB's liebgott and MotA's rosie). the former show has survivors the characters can help, the latter shows no one left to help. the former has all of easy company there, the latter has rosie there all alone. rosie's scene felt deeply personal in that way. at the end of the day, both scenes are communicating different things. that doesn't make one better than the other when they aren't trying to be identical. (disclaimer, i'm not jewish, so i'd be interesting hearing from the perspective of someone who wrt whether or not they felt it was "shoe-horned")

i can understand if you've disliked the show post-episode 6 (and episode 6 was a very strong episode i'm ngl). eps 7 and 8 were weaker in many ways, even to me, so i get it. everyone's entitled to their own opinion (i'd be a hypocrite saying otherwise). just understand that this blog is run by someone who overall enjoys this show despite its flaws! basically, i encourage you to take this energy and make your own posts.

#masters of the air #hbo war #e9 #asks #long post #masters of the air spoilers #mota spoilers #all the hbo war finales are different. i don't think MotA's is as strong but like #my fav hbo war show is still BoB and even Then i don't think it has a better finale than TP. and i dislike a lot of TP! like A Lot! #and Even Then we don't get a good idea about what happens to a lot of the minor-er characters in TP once they leave #anyone who isn't sledge or leckie (rip basilone) is hand-waved-'they went home'-away #not every show needs a sandlot ending w/ a voiceover going: #'[NAME] got really into the [INSERT DECADE] and no one ever saw him again' like they did to webster (rip webster) #and again! i'm mixed about the redtails. but i can Very Clearly See this show getting released without including them #which wouldve left many people (justifiably!) upset that they weren't shown when they were Literally there in the same pow camp #i'll give the hbo war team a lot of shit about a lot of things (despite the enduringly positive energy i try to keep up here) #but i Have to give MotA props for Trying. i don't see faux inclusion i just see it as not quite hitting the mark but an attempt was made #and i think that's worth Something given neither BoB or TP bothered trying #(like i think there was a missed opportunity in TP not mentioning what's happening to japanese americans on the home front) #this got away from me (i'm also opinionated) but while i can agree with you about how the show feels rushed #i do take issue with the idea that they were pretending to be inclusive. i'll blame money time and covid19 before i blame bad intention #maybe that's controversial here but it Is my blog. so.

[corpsentry]

have you played the newest loz game?? your fics for the series are my favourite ever

so here's the deal. i bought totk the day it released. i got it. i started playing it but then we went on our long awaited planned it for 3 years 1 week vacation and less then 48 hours after i'd returned from that BAM, i was in australia. and what was there to do now? we played taiko, dog, so much taiko, we lived together, 3 college kids in an apartment with a balcony with a view of the city skyline. it was the craziest thing i'd ever done. i loved and cried and fought and learned and grew and got so mf good at taiko and learned that there was still more to do and cooked and cut onions and ate obscene amounts of yogurt and then when it was over it was already august and we were standing at the airport sobbing into each other's shirts not wanting to let go but eventually we did we got on our planes home and then, only then, did i find the space in my heart and schedule and hands to play totk. three weeks later, i was in america

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the real problem at the heart of this affair is that i still haven't found my motherfucking glider. where the fuck is it. i've combed the map north to south east to west i've found every goddamn character in the game but purah. purah you selfish selfish lady. where are you? where are you??????

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and so it was that they would not finish totk not for another several months not for possibly years. which is not to say that i don't want to, i miss writing fanfiction, i missed the drama and the scope of our ambitions and the burning need to write write write but i was also madly depressed and anxious and not doing well and that's where the writing came from, yknow dog? it existed because there was nothing else i could do. it saved my life. and now i am no longer in need of saving, now i've saved myself, i've been searching for years and years for the place where i can have my friends and lovers and stories and also have this. i still haven't found it. but i'll let you know when i do

#replies #it's a hard thing to juggle Life #you see. idk how the fuck people with jobs still hang out in fandom like that shit's wild to me #my farts are extra smelly today. i also go to one of those liberal arts schools where if you dont put in the work u actually do die #and i enjoy the work. and the taiko. god the taiko #guys i started playing taiko because of my ex and then i played more than her and got better and i love taiko so much #i want to do it for the rest of my life dude. that's where all my time went #instead of going home in the evening i go to the studio and we DON KON DOKO DON DOKONKO DOROTSUKU #and it's so good. i feel strong (will be stronger when i fix my health problems) and alive and good #and that's where the part of my heart i saved from writing fanfiction on the internet is right now i think #what can i say. it's fucking beautiful out here #im glad i wrote what i mustt admit is pretty damn good zelda fic. im glad im here right now #so it goes

[lobotomyladylives]

people often assume when we all go out together that I'm my half brothers mom (I'm 20 years older than him) & that his parents are his grandparents & it's so funny bc I know it bothers them. old ass idiots

#my dad was 49 & his wife was 45 when they had him #the story behind his birth is actually extremely fucked up like everything else about their relationship #so my dad left her like a million times to try to go back to my mom (who kept telling him no unless he sorted out his issues) then he #would always run right back to her & she always took him back. anyways i guess he said smth along the lines of #''my wife (he was still married to my mom) will always be the love of my life bc shes the mother of my kids'' #and...she went off bc & on fertility treatments without telling him. then shes pregnant & he is still saying he wants to come back to us #so she said he will never see their kid & her son from a previous marraige THREATENED MY DAD AT GUNPOINT #and said if you ever leave my mom again ill fucking kill yoi #so then the divorce was finalized & they got married & my half brother was born. rest is history #for the record i dont feel sorry for my dad at all it was his fault too. the fucking hypocrite was having sex before marriage #and he knew she was nuts & far too attached to her #what a fucking idiot. all he had to do was get on meds & in therapy & admit he was wrong & he could have stayed with us #but he needed constant validation & to be in charge of everything & thats what his new wife gives him. she converted to his cult & now they #raise my brother in it. and she just does whatever my dad wants & lets him treat her like shit. i would actually feel sorry for her if sh #if she werent such a fucking awful person. and she tries to be all nicey nice w/us despite being a literal homewrecker. #and doing things like telling my dad he cant spend more than 50 dollars per year on each of us #while having him buy her a third car & a 1500 dollar fur coat. lol #theyre so much better off financially than us that its unreal. my mom doesnt get a penny despite how much we are struggling #but if i want a relationship with my half brother i just have to pretend none of this is weird or wrong. #anyways i just hope he never finds out the circumstances of his birth bc god can you fucking imagine

[detransraichu]

broooo not my ex making posts abt how hard it is to come to terms with being conventionally attractive while having low self-esteem issues and how wild it is to get compliments randomly on their appearance when they go out and how they're worried that their new transmasc boytoy is only into them bc they're hot -_- i'm tired... meanwhile i'm just seen as a gremlin now that i'm not hyperfem... they truly have the biggest issues in the world lol

also they were like "omg turns out i'm not ace i just needed a bf lol" and i'm like yeah. i know. you've been lusting after male characters for years. you were horny as fuck just not for me bc i didn't transition. you only made moves on me when you were bored, lonely or drunk. i always asked if that was the case and you were like no baby it's just your insecurities i don't need you to transition uwu. for 5 years. my trust issues are thru the roof now yayyyyy /dies

#lay text #i'm being mean and petty ugh #my heart kinda hurts but talking w my counsellor abt it helped #it rly helps to have a neutral third party to vent to #also i still think my ex is a good person i don't actually hate them i love them as a friend. but i do hate what they did to me #i hate that they went along w us dating bc they're too much of a doormat. i hate that they thought abt breaking up w me for years #but never told me bc they were worried i wouldn't survive without them financially or emotionally #feels so fucking infantilizing #now i'm so much better off without them despite being broke #that was my first and only real relationship my first time my first everything. i'm so embarrassed wtf i was RIGHT i was right all along #i was right it wasn't just insecurities they straight up never wanted me they wanted future transitioned male-passing me #it was all lies!!! from the get-go!!! meanwhile i did so much romantic bullshit and i was wearing rose colored glasses!!!! #and i was a big dyke. being with a woman who identified as a woman would've made me 2000x happier anyway. we could've just stayed roommates #i'm so bitter guys. i feel so jaded but i'm trying not to be :/ #and now they have so much luck in their love life #and i'm just a lonely gremlin dyke who only attracts polyam/casual girls who only want me on the side #where tf is my love story :'( i've been trying SOOO FUCKING HARD to gain my ex's affection for 5 freaking years i was the most loveydovey g #i deserve a love story i think i've really earned it by now!!!!! #so much love to give #now they have it so easy wtf. feels unfair ngl. i'm happy for them obviously they deserve happiness too. but i am still bitter >:/ #trying to process these feels instead of repressing them for once. i have a tendency to bottle up angst bc i think i'm bad for being mad #but nope those r healthy emotions!!! i can work thru this #it just sucks #if you read all of this bs i give you a cookie 🍪 <3

[silenthillbunni]

.

#it went!!! idk lately my pain treshhold has been so low bc im in pain all the time #so i just dont wnna be in pain anymore... he said that now it'll still hurt for a few days T-T #but he wasnt exactly sure what it was but i had.. a cavity?? #im not rlly sure abt the english terms for all of this but the tooth is dying lol #but instead of immediately killing it nd getting a root fill he said that we should give the tooth a chance #so he fixed what he could fix #i hate dentist treatments bc of all the air nd water nd my anxiety i need to swallow constantly #but this time i actually told them abt it nd he was very helpful sksks #he even said 'ok now take a break nd swallow' so i didnt need to be so anxious #nd it was a relief bc he wasnt bad at all. he was actually rlly nice nd easy to talk to phewww #it cost abt $80 so i can manage to be without that until next week!!!! #so yeah it went much better than i had anticipated so im happy abt that #but yeah the problem still isnt 100% fixed yet so im still not relieved #he said i had a cavity in my other tooth as well but that we needed to check that at another time #im so frustrated bc i brush my teeth 2/day i use mouthwash i floss.... #and for the last 7 months i havent even had any sugar!!!!! like why did this still happen.. o.o #oh nd he also said that i probably clench my teeth nd yeah i do that a lot more than i've realized #your teeth arent supposed to be touching!! never!! only when u eat #my teeth.... are touching pretty much all day omg. bc im so tense nd anxious #he said that he couldnt be sure bc he didnt have enough info to go on but that could have contributed to this #well well... i did it nd went even if i didnt want to #hopefully my tooth will be better now. nd i have another appt in may to see what i could get done further #if financial aid for it gets approved tho it might not #but yeah.. god dental pain nd issues is my no. 1 fear bc im poor nd i cant afford it

[milflewis]

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#in a strange place today and i need to put this somewhere. i do not have a journal yet. this is it #my grandad was diagnosed with dementia years ago and the grandad i have now is often unrecognisable from the one i grew up with #and while this like isn’t fun and it is strange for him to look at me and not know me more times than he does. it has also been kind of l #lovely? #bc he thinks my granny is still alive so whenever i get to go see him i get to pretend she is too. and she is for a minute. and tho i am #glad she went before him. it is nice to say oh i’m popping in to see her after this grandad and talk about her like she’s hasn’t been gone #since i’ve been ten. my dad has spoken more to him in the last five years than he has his whole life #he was not an easy man. he was loud and friendly and hard working and funny and scary but not easy. in ways he is even #harder now. in others he is easier. #he is more of a child. this is what dementia can do to a brain. we are learning things about his childhood that no one alive has ever spoken #about. that no one knew. my dad doesn’t love him more now but he understands him better #my grandad taught me how to drive a tractor and how to fish through my dad and he has not recognised me in over a year and he #hasn’t walked since he broke his pelvis seven years ago and his muscles are nearly all gone. he is a fraction of the size he used to be. his #personality and body took up my childhood like adults on the screen in cartoons. he hasn’t dressed himself in a decade. he told one of the #nurses that after dinner he wanted ice cream plain like herself and nearly peed when she laughed and told him to fuck off #he is in there. he is himself. i know him. but he isn’t. he doesn’t know me but he allows me to tell him how to ppl he knows are doing. he #still somehow trusts me. we talk a lot about my granny and how she stayed up watching tv again last night so she’s tired today. don’t stay #long when you call in to see her? #whenever we would journey to see him and my granny and get in v late he’d ask us if we wanted apple tart and my granny would say michael. #not ur kids. u can’t parent them. he didn’t know my name yesterday but he asked me if i wanted apple tart #i hope he dies soon. for all that i will miss this. miss my dad having this. he would not want to live like this. it wouldntbe living to him

[petefromarma]

this is a bummer stream of consciousness post so open at your own risk or whatever

we clown on swifties/former swifties but i will say i’ve seen more of them hold her feet to the fire re silence on palestine than i have any of us re members of fob who aren’t andy

patrick irritates me most irt this topic bc he's openly an abolitionist and like that means nothing if ur not also speaking abt colonization and imperialism in the global south. i suppose one could argue he's not ‘openly’ anything as he hasn't made any statements but i consider the t-shirts as good as

pete is less surprising bc as someone who was raised in the party it's clear to me he's a dyed in the wool vote blue no matter who dem. i mean i grew up poor so we come from different economic backgrounds but i also have a parent who has been a dem since they could vote. so i never expected anything from him. most elected dems and ppl heavily involved w the party have stayed silent at best so

i also have issues w andy's politics bc i think anarchoprimitivism is a fucking bonkers ideology but i respect his dedication to antiracism + anti imperialism

in addition to this i don't think andy's morals and the fact that he has a backbone should like "trickle down” to the others or whatever. they're adults w autonomy and they should be making their own statements individually or together as a band. and like let me be clear i'm not saying they should say something bc i need or want them to personally or whatever. they should say something bc it's the decent and morally correct thing to do and like imo in the comments of every stupid insta announcement for new overpriced merch or tour updates we should be bugging them abt this bc we know pete at least does read them. esp if we’re actually going to be buying tickets/merch

#i went to go look to make sure this was still applicable btw and while i did see one person speaking on palestine re the new clad drop post #it was literally only one person #i just feel like we can be doing better on this as a fandom #anyway happy wedding day to andy my gift to him is saying smth nice abt his politics for once