#but it's so much it's so heavy there's no way out i cant do it

[poppy-metal]

patrick making art fuck you in front of him?!? can’t stop thinking about it. he’d make you feel disgusting and would degrade you for being so greedy when he knows deep down that he loves this, it was his idea after all.

i think both men have a bit of cuck in them, if only because their own attraction to eachother makes the jealousy they feel a turn on. patrick watching art fuck you is as much about watching the way arts body moves as it is about seeing your tight little pussy get stretched out. he starts the situation as a power play, knows about arts little crush on you and your little crush on him, and thinks it'll be cute to see the way the both of you blush and fumble with eachother.

but god his cock is so hard its not long before he has to fish it out - get his hand around the thick hard length of it and start tugging on it relentlessly as he watches arts pink cock slide between the puffy lips of your cunt. that long beautiful cock. cant help commenting on it, either. "you look fucking hot rubbing her like that. keep doing it, she likes it."

and you do. the combination of patricks heady eyes on your spread cunt , while his best friend - hands sweaty and trembling against your own shaking thighs, to hold them open, god he's so much stronger than his lanky build lets on, so, so much stronger - humps his cock against your wet slit. you feel his silken head bump up against your clit with every nudge and cant stop whining. you feel his breath skitter against the back of your neck when patrick speaks, his fingers tightening into your flesh, hips shifting, cock plugging against your hole and rubbing it there - back and forth, back and forth.

"oh -. oh, god-"

"yeah." patrick grunts, and you can hear the wet slick of his fist sliding up and down his dick. can see his heavy balls bouncing with every vicious tug. lips red and bitten and parted, he looks just as fucked as you do, just watching. "fuck yeah, it feels good baby? you like arts big fucking cock?"

soft curls tickle your nape. followed by the wet of his lips as he mouths at your skin, you can imagine his face, bright cherry red at patricks vulgarity but he doesn't ask him to stop. he ruts more insistently. you hear him ask, soft - "d - do you?" he sounds so wrecked. "like it - like this. do you want me to-"

"put it in-" you beg. rock down so his tip nudges your entrance, just barely knocking inside an inch. balancing there, waiting to feel the push the ache the stretch. "patrick - tell him - want it. want it so bad."

"mm" patricks eyes close for a moment, head tipping back. you can see the veins in his throat as he swallows, squeezes himself hard, before he blinks his eyes back open, digs his thumb into his slit to feel the slick pre that bubbles there. "yeah, okay. do it, man. let me see you stretch that pussy out."

you dont know who moans louder out of the three of you the moment the head pops in and you begin to slide down.

#ask #anyway #patrick zweig smut #art donaldson smut #challengers smut

[bspeaks]

friendly reminder that nicholas ruffilo has a monster cock.

he is fucking huge and theres no debating it! i dont care what anyone says! i will die on this hill!

good thing he has excellent composure and amazing self control because getting turned on in public is just not an option for him- there is no hiding his massive bulge (especially not in those skinny jeans he wears).

he has the kind of dick that makes you dizzy just looking at it. the first time you see it you cant hide the shock on your face and it makes him all nervous. his worry takes over and he starts rambling on about how you don't have to take it if you're scared but he'll be so gentle with you if you do wanna try. you have to reassure him that its okay and you trust that he wouldnt hurt you.

you decide to start by using just your hands to get him off but omg you can barely wrap your hand around him!! he feels so thick and heavy against your hand that youre getting nervous and shaky so maybe its a better idea to just let him use your mouth??

you start slow with little licks and then you try taking as much of him in your mouth as you can (not even half). its going so well until- oops! he accidentally ruts his hips forward and pushes himself down your throat. he was just so worked up at that point that he couldnt help it...

he sees the tears that start to fall from your eyes as you gag around him and immediately pulls out. of course hes spitting out one apology after another because he sees tears and thinks he hurt you! he never wants to hurt you!! you have to reassure him once again that youre okay and the tears just came along with your gag reflex.

once you finally get him to believe youre okay, you pick up right where you left off and take him all the way down your throat. poor boy cums almost immediately when you gag around him again. you pull off, coughing due to the strain of trying to fit him in your mouth in addition to the load of cum he just spilled down your throat. he starts apologizing again for forgetting to warn you that he was close (hes so sweet, i love him).

but youre not mad at him, you know he cant help being so massive :(

#nicholas ruffilo #nick ruffilo #bad omens #bad omens cult #bad omens smut #nicholas ruffilo fanfic #i apologize

[inniave]

every once in awhile i have a flashback so bad it triggers a seizure & nobody really knows why

#i am so fucking tired #and so fucking done #i would rather die than go in tomorrow but that's not an option anymore so fuck #the flashbacks have been constant for as long as i can remember but it's been awhile since they've been at this intensity for this long #i used to think i didn't have ptsd because i didn't have flashbacks until i learned that always feeling like it's happening again is indeed #a flashback #it's just not so isolated for me #so i'm like??? i should be able to deal with this. i'm used to it. pretty much every second of every day my body feels like i'm being #raped and tortured and beat and literally getting drilled in the bone i should be used to this #but it's so much it's so heavy there's no way out i cant do it #but i have to there's no other option except not get surgery which is not really an option :/ #cause the pain from the bone is right where their cocks were 🙃 so that's been it's own special form of hell #and now i have to let someone cut me open there 🙃 and i cant be under general anesthesia 🙃 #oh yeah and ITS EXAFTLY FUCKING LIKE THAT DOCTOR THAT ASSAULTED ME WHEN I WAS A FUCKING TODDLER COMING OUT OF SURGERY #fuck dude #sometimes i think maybe if it only happened once i'd be okay #ive lost track but i think we're up in triple digits at this point :/ #not including the constant stuff in childhood #fuck no wonder i kept trying to kill myself jesus fucking christ #i'm so fucking scared #i'm so ready for all this to be over #it's been years of pain and this whole last month where it's become much more acute and all this visits and i cant take any more #we are at Capacity #we're splitting like hell already #fucking entire new subsystems fuck #fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[icewindandboringhorror]

sometimes looking at like Self Help Strategies lists for the symptoms I'm having is always just like:

thing that I already do

thing I have tried 10 times

thing I already do

thing that I don't have the money to do

thing I already do

thing I've been doing since I was 10yrs old to no avail

thing that is impossible given my situation

thing that doesn't apply to me

thing that I already do

thing I have already tried

hrmm, oh wait, maybe finally- OH, yeah.. okay. thing that I already do but it was just phrased slightly differently

thing I have already done

#I think maybe productivity tips help less if the reason you're unproductive is partially like.. physcial health and other extenral things #out of your control. rather than just like having trouble paying attention or spending too much time on tiktok or whatever #all the strategic to do lists in the world are not going to somehow prevent me from waking up with a debilitating migraine or whatever #or having external stressors or lacking resources and connections or other Productivity Essentials etc. #especially many tips involve stuff like 'cut off from social media' since thats the modern day time waster for so many poeple #and it's like.. lol.. i can hardly even maintain a blog even thuogh i actively WANT TO DO SO. 'shut off your smart phone!' already #done babey i fucking hate smart phones i shall never use an app unless i am forced to. 'delete tiktok' yep. already covered. tiktok and #all of those thinsg are my enemies. 'save money by cancelling some of your services' cool. already ahead of you. #who the fuck is out here paying for like 10 different subscription services. pirated videos uploaded to google drive and youtube to mp3 #my beloved. etc. etc. and so on. 'socialize less' .........LOL.. if only you knew.. mr.writer of the article. i can barely muster #talking to friends more than once a month and even less if I'm actively sick (often occurence) etc. etc. ... hewoo #I think maybe instead of generic productivity tips I need more like.. how to refocus and be productive anyway even if you have a headache #or are nauseous or etc. Not that those are always things to ignore. and of course you should let your body rest and etc. But plenty of peop #e have mild physical symptoms and just work through them. Ithink something about the way my body/mind is SOO hyper attuned to all #sensory information just makes it like... constantly 'GRR well I cant focus on WRITING right now because my lef #t ear feels weird and my socks are too itchy and my back has a strange pressure and I'm vaguely warm and my eye feels some ssort of #way it doesnt normally feel and I'm hyperaware of my breathing and also nauseous for no reason' and like half of those things I #think '''normal''' people wouldnt even notice or at least would be able to just live through. but for me it's like.. nealry impossible to i #gnore and soooo distracting always. like 'wahh.. nooo we can't draw or get anything done.. my legs feel slightly heavy or something!!' #like............. ok......... who cares. thats not even a PAIN sensation it's just something weird. but it's just like.. NO. constant #mental alerts about the 'heaviness' of your legs be upon ye. Though Imean like.. yes.. 70% of the time I am in genuine pain #or having some sort of actual ailment with trackable physical symptoms. but sometimes it's just like... we could totally be working right #now and ignoring this silly thing but my brain is fixated on it for no reason uncontrollably. etc. etc. I guess it's the same way that like #most people can go to a grocery store without the whole experience being so overwhelming and so much stuff going on at once #that they have to rest afterwards but like.. in my own HOME doing NOTHING i feel like I should be able to not get overwhelmed lol. ANYWAY #Rolling my bastard little rock up a dumbass hill and so on and so forth

[lunarharp]

lazy scribbling of my baldur's gate 3 characters

#*emerges from 430 HOURS of life-changing playtime blearily like a lost and confused kitten* #i lost my interest in drawing bc everything is too sad & horrible right now. it was a luxury and privilege to lose myself in this instead #what follows will be my personal and trivial emotions about that #i'll do better proper drawings later. for me. they are both so very dear to me... deeply dear...unforgettable journeys of fate #truly have played like one possessed for the past few weeks. you have no idea. what do i do now. what do i do. #their personalities are so vivid to me though they mostly made the same choices. both intersex and they/them - canonically <3 #i missed out on FOUR PARTY MEMBERS in my first playthrough due to not understanding anything whatsoever. #gloaming ended up with wyll and pavane romanced karlach and astarion. and ended up with the one i did NOT plan on. this wasnt the plan #one of the most fulfilling romance paths i've ever..i cant say more..it all got too immersive and now i have to just.. MOVE ON ?????????? #live in THIS world where i can't gut imperialism personally and emerge alive from that? #without Long Resting? without my character requesting a kiss from their beloved after a tough day ?? #without preparing my little spells? without channelling divinity from my death god to keep us all alive? #without dyeing my man's clothes fancy colours for him? without him Approving whenever i lie and double-cross our enemies #without sharing clothes with my ex? without choosing to eat the heavy food first so that the weight is easier on her Carrying Capacity? #without orchestrating ways for all of my friends to kill the abusers that ruined their lives for a decade or even 200 years? #without experiencing degrading horrors on a daily basis but in a cathartic way where we always make it back to our rooms at the inn #WITHOUT SPEAK WITH ANIMALS??????????? #at least there's music. just like with persona 5 that will always be with me. always #like how p5 melodies take me back to those feelings. those rich and personal feelings.... BUT THIS WAS A WAY MORE NUTS EXPERIENCE #i thought i would hate it. i did at times. thought it would desensitise me to various things. it did. but there was so much more..it was... #Well anyway *continues my life* imagine if dnd was real..something to think about

[wat-zu]

Absolutely love your art. I want to nom it.

Also, Hollow Heads Siblings my beloveds,,,

Theyre the doomed siblings ever its not even funny

#Oouugh i have thoughts abt the hollowhead siblings. How theyre so intricately tied to eachother since their birth but they'd be #Eachother'd downfall. Esp when it's Dark and his relationship with the others #Dark would never understand what chosen went through. Mainly bc i think chosen is used to fighting his internal battles on his own #While he was in captive as an ad blocker. He loves Dark. He's grateful for Dark bc without him he wouldn't be free #But Dark isnt exactly someone reliable enough for Chosen to get the necessary healing he wants and needs #But that won't stop Dark from trying to fix him. Creates the virus for revenge. As chosen watches his brother spiral and spiral #As he watches him drift further away. Unable to get him back without a shouting match. As he watches with his heart heavy and cracked at- #Their stiffed interactions and strained relationship. He can't remember a time where they shared geniune laughs. #Then tsc coming came and changed everything. #Because this is someone who went through Chosen's pain albeit a lil differently. Someone who knows. Someone who /understands/. And this- #Someone is so much more younger than them and had to go through that pain in such a short amount of time since their birth #He sees himself in them. And he's rather walk up to alan demanding to get his hands cuffed than let tsc fester in that pain. #So tsc became chosen's priority. Healed eachother in many ways than one and are at echother's beck and call if need be. #As for Dark. I think he'd manipulate tsc into using him for his revenge. After stalking out his code and finding out about his potential #And TSC cant help but fall for his manipulations. Since this person is very very important to Chosen and they want so badly to impress- #Them both. They agreed and overtime grew to love eachother. And overtime Dark shifted his goals just a tad bit. Getting TSC more and more- #Involved. Since hey if Chosen doesn't like touching alan with a 10 ft pole why not let this kid do. And TCS agrees to this thinking that- #This is it. This is can finally heal them completely. Finally out of sight and out of mind. Finally can't live without the pain lingering #And chosen watches them with a sense of deja vu. At loss at what to do and so so afraid to lose two of his lil siblings #Then shit hits the brick UBSJDBSJSN #They make me so ill im not even kidding when i said theyre so so very very doomed!!!!!!!!! #This is abt the au btw BAHHAHAHABHA

[tricks-n-illusions]

{ @askoinari } So, your one true wish in this whole entire universe is to die, hm? Tragic, pitiful really. All this fuss and a temper tantrum because you couldn’t win mommy’s love? Even your own god does not grant you the peace you so desperately long for, stringing you along like a puppet. Do you honestly think your death will solve all your problems? Knowing your god, they’d probably spite you back to life in the form of a ghost for a laugh, wouldn’t that be ironic? I suppose nobody else would care about your death considering your track record for violence, but what of your No-so-apparent companion here? Wouldn’t they mourn you, at the very least? Judging from your charming nature, probably not! Good luck on your fools’ errand. - Yako

Silas's ears flattened as he backed away from Yako, for the first time it seemed he was fearful of someone. Though you couldn't place why... But, Silas knew, he knew exactly why, it was that damn mask, the posture, the aura, the way their tail seemed to become a wisp. It was like looking at a ghost. Once he realized why Yako scared him Silas couldn't do much but freeze in place and squeeze his eyes shut, hoping they would just leave. His fear response became painfully apparent as the moments passed. All he could muster up was a feeble anxious whimper, maybe that would magically make them spare him from the incoming verbal assault. Then they spoke. It sounded just like her. In his terror it WAS her.

Seance's tone was mocking, something Silas was guilty of doing... or maybe he was just copying her the whole time. Even so, she just quietly hummed in thought, looking over him as she ever so slightly inched closer and closer.

"Even after all these years, you're still chasing after her love? Desperately hoping one day she'll forgive you for all the pain you caused her?" Though Seance's voice was soft, her words were not. "I told you, She doesn't love you and she never will. Why can't you get that through your head?" She paused, giving her words a moment to sink in before she spoke up again. "Silas." She sounded upset. "What did I tell you about not looking at me while I'm talking to you?" He cringed at that but didn't reply.

When he didn't do what she said, she just gave a soft, "Tsk." Well, He always was a coward, of course he didn't have the guts to even look at her. She gently brushed a claw over his face before finally letting go with an annoyed sigh. Despite Seance's words, Yako's voice was still loud and clear, mocking him along with her. Her voice seemed to compliment theirs perfectly.

Seance quickly broke into laughter at the thought of that herself.

"Isn't that right, Little fox?" Truth always hurt. Silas couldn't deny it, Yako was right. Seance was right, every word every insult was right. When tears finally began to well up and Seance's voice faded, Silas found the courage to speak. His voice was soft and faint. A mere whisper compared to the onslaught of words from Yako. "Please..."

Silas's words obviously went unheard. His claws just dug further into his skin, blood beginning to trail down his arm, the moment it finally seemed like Yako was going to stop talking, Silas broke from his fearful trance. In one quick sweeping motion, Silas threw out a Night Slash.

"JUST SHUT UP ALREADY." He shouted. "You have NO right to TALK DOWN to me like I'm beneath you! I AM NOT BENEATH YOU." He sounded unsure. "You don't know who the fuck I am, and I don't think you want to find out. So, Shut the fuck up or I'll make you! I have no fucking problem with killing you right here. Unless you want to be gutted I suggest you FUCK OFF." Silas lowly growled, his teeth bared, a blatant attempt at aggression, though his behaviour portrayed more fear than anything. Yako obviously touched a nerve with his words.

He didn't care. Finally, after everything the tears began to flow, all he could do was sniff and wipe them away. "...Fucking pathetic." He grumbled, his words seemed to be addressed to Yako but it quickly became clear it was for himself.

→ Yako has been added to the relationships page. → Seance has been added to the characters page. → Silas is now injured and will stay that way until he addresses it.

[ Ask from @askoinari ]

#Long post #very word heavy #tni: chrono #tni: silas rune #tni: seance #tw: gore #tw: blood #I tried to leave it open ended about attacking yako cause #Silas essentially just threw a night slash + his own blood at them so could be anything really #simply a blood splatter? who knows #if you feel like replying Silas is at your mercy do whatever you please to him #I got backup plans for my backup plans /hj #...And ah yes this is the famous way seance died - picking at silas till he just flipped out on her #dudes seriously unstable Silas can dish insults out but he sure as hell cant take it when they target him so personally #Thank you so much for sending this ask I was so excited for it! #Chapter 1: The Introduction

[clownsnake]

dokja doing his best time and time again to help junghyeok with regressor depression…. I see the sauce being cooked here

#it’s gay sauce #for gay people. #going post #Orv #tbh dokja I think you should just tell junghyeok everything at this point. not for gay reasons but to make things easier #these two work rlly well together when junghyeok isn’t trying to kill dokja imagine how they’d be if they were fully on the same page too #every day there’s a new fuckin dokkaebi. where do they keep getting these guys #and why do they keep getting cuntier #A THANOS SNAP??? #choosing between a thanos snap and killing the strongest incarnation. alright everyone time to speed up on the killing nirvana thing I gues #Junghyeok relying on the predictability of knowing everything…. You can take the man out of the timeloop but you can’t take the timeloop ou #of the man #(I know he’s not out of his regressions but sh) #‘I can’t think of a way to correct this’ junghyeok aren’t you supposed to be smart? Stop being stupid #dokja gets me. that’s why he’s also a reader #Ohhh okay we’re having a Big Talk now. good job dokja #‘But the real problem is when you’ve finally managed to save the world’ THATS WHAT IM SAYING!!!!! DOKJA GETS ME #YOU CAN TAKE THE MAN OUT OF THE TIMELOOP BUT YOU CANT TAKE THE TIMELOOP OUT OF THE MAN! #unless junghyeok kicks his regressor’s depression in the ass and learns not to rely on knowing future scenarios so much. #and they’re on a rooftop…. The symsbsnolismm…. #Oh wait dokja’s making a different point #ah. ptsd. #well that’s part of my argument I guess #Ohhhhh I love dokja getting to be a prophet rn. and junghyeok realizing he’s onto some shit #‘This world you’re about to abandon could be the only world where you can live to see it end as a human being’ OOOOF. OOF. #that’s heavy #Anyway time for comic relief. sorry Uriel but no gay sex yet #‘Who’s the strongest incarnation?’ Junghyeok: no doubt it’s me #………………………………. #DOKJA IS ALSO CONSIDERING HIMSELF THE STRONGEST?? GUYS

[skeletalheartattack]

Favourite personal weapon?

(you CANNOT say battleaxe!)

probably scythe. like i know it's not really good at all for like. combat. but like look at that shit. pretty dope blade while i hold the stick. sooo cool.

#ask #anon #im not sure anything else really compares. i dont honestly think about real life weapons that much really that said. #not without being like. shotgun. or double barreled shotgun. atleast if were restricted to melee combat here. #most games i tend to play shotgun a lot #except tf2 recently where ive been shooting pee darts and donking folks with cannon balls #granted. i range from class to class with no real like... goal? whatever fits the situation and that im confident in. #like i like playing soda popper milk fan o war scout a lot. i like playing pee sniper w/ shahanshah. #for demo i tend to always go loose cannon scottish resistance scottish handshake #scottish resistance cause i like coating a battlefield with stickies and just doing my best to detonate them when i think its important to #fucking hate sticky spamming btw. valve had the right idea nerfing that shit when they did. yknow. before they reverted it. #those things should be doing 60 damage when spammed... and like can do 144 after like a second or two or whatever #that way it punishes spamming and rewards using them as traps #but then the people who have sticky stranges would get mad or whatever. idk. its weird to me that valve reverted the nerf somewhat #it does a lot of damage and you dont gotta even hit the enemy directly with the projectile. so its an easy weapon. #idk. #for heavy i dont have a real loadout im happy with. i tend to go brass beast family business and eviction notice #ik tomislav is like the best overall minigun but. idk. #eviction notice really sucks but once someones pestering me up close i really like to chase them down while punching them #since most of the 9 classes cant get out of range. ive managed to do it a bunch despite how much i dont like the weapon. #like. i wish it didnt have the max health drain. id prefer if like. i couldnt be overhealed if i had them equipped. #the slight speed increase is. okay. paired with the increase in speed when hitting a player. #though if it was simplified. id add those two stats together for the on hit attribute. #so like... less damage. faster swing speed. faster movement when hitting an enemy for a second. and no overheal when equipped. #instead of it just being a weirder worse gru. #that way its just about punishing players who get too close. and makes you weaker if youve got a medic. since you cant be overhealed. #soldier... i just use rocket launcher/black box panic attack and whip. nothing really unique about my playstyle with him. #engineer. panic attack pistol gunslinger or jag. #im no good with the widowmaker and i like having 6 shots so id rather not use the frontier justice. #anyway im at the tag limit. thank you for the ask anon!!!

[sm-writes-chaos]

my ocs really are just facets of myself holy ezerk

#if I was cooler that is #or stupider #actually I am both but am able to hold it back enough to seem like a normal human being #sometimes I get a little to silly and forget to actually try and be normal (in the way where I don't shutdown and can form actual words) #and those times are scary because they look at me weird #like I cant actually say words I am blubbering and laughing nervously and hesitating until I realize need to PULL MYSELF TOGETHER #and stop thinking so much and actually say something #I forget that I cannot pause time and take as long as I need to respond #example #person: have this brownie #me: oh no I *heavy breathing thinking'no I cant take this brownie I've had enough I will get sick I need to smile SMILE what do I say wait #I know what to say ohmugosh get out of your own head TALK' No thanks! <- suddenly snaps back to reality corrects posture and smiles #I like get trapped in my own brain #wait how did this turn into a rant????? #uh #gbye #I dunno how to explain this does this make sense?

[wings-of-angels]

trying to plan out what pokèmon bruce wayne would have... much to think about

#i am envisioning batman to have: noivern (obviously he must have one bat pokèmon). lucario. and greninja #i chose the last 2 partly because i like those pokèmon but theyre also powerful and stealthy pokèmon #so fitting for batman #and noiverns more of a less-stealthy heavy hitter i guess for when hes gotten civillians out the way #batman would have to have some sort of earplugs or padding in his cowl to deal with the sound noivern creates though.. hmmmmm #im also thinking he should have some sort of electric or tech pokèmon but i cant decide which one.. #i gotta balance strategy vs his asthetic #it would be good if he had a fire and/or grass type pokèmon too but none really fit his vibe #also it would make sense he have a fighting type (aside from lucario) but i dislike all the fighting types 😔😔 #sorry pretty privellage is REAL and it is stopping me from giving him other fighting types #idk.. much to think about #i think lucario makes a lot of sense tbh like they both have the drive to do good and help people #i can envision bruce finding a riolu during his time training and instantly having that connection #ORRR bruce is so strung up on his anger and bitterness. it takes meeting riolu (who rejects him for not being as virtuous as b would think) #for bruce to kinda enforce his own principles #of becoming batman to HELP amd do GOOD and not just for vengence #meanwhile i chose greninja cos its one of my favs #brucie wayne would also need different pokèmon to batman. otherwise his secret identity is WAYY too obvious #it would depend on what kind of bruce wayne i want tho #the more ditsy playboy brucie would have different pokèmon to... e.g. ben afflecks batman whos more sleazy businessman #so many different options #SORRY FOR THE RAMBLE i am... thinking

[qualityrain]

i was relatively normal about firefly wedding until chapter 12. do u know how insane it is for a yandere to stay even when the yandere thing doesnt matter anymore. the shift from selfish to unconditional love just like that???? its so my love is heavy because its a burden but ill let you let go of it if it makes you happy im going to eat a brick

#its so crazy like yk how i play grindblue fantasy that shift from selfish to unconditional love TAKES TIME. IT TAKES SUPPORT FROM OTHER PEOP #sandy needed THREE events to get there #nier still hasnt gotten there. #the way shinpei does it BY HIMSELF because he CARES THAT MUCH???? #because he sees that it makes satoko unhappy and shes crying and he cares enough to throw the yandere thing out the window and STAYS. #satoko doesnt do anything to convince him to stay he does it by himself he cant even leave for long #boy your love is heavy because its a burden but also consider there’s a lot of it #this is not me saying that shinpei stops the yandere jealousy shit btw im saying he stops caring abt satoko #because of the marriage thing but because he himself cares a lot #claude txt #EDIT. CHECKED THE OFFICIAL ENG FIREFLY WEDDING TRANSLATION. THE LINE ISNT MY LOVE IS HEAVY #UHHH PRETEND IT IS

[midwestblue]

I think (as much as I annoyingly complain and whine about not having a partner) being single this long has been good for me. I'm learning a lot about myself and I'm learning why I was a shit person, and through finding the root of the problem I can kind of... start to heal. I can be nicer to myself so I can grow and get better. Because TBH.. being mean and cruel to yourself doesn't make you become a better person. It just makes you believe that thats what you /are,/ and thats what you /always will be,/ as opposed to realizing that you are a product of your circumstances but that does not mean you can't get better and become a better person. Accepting help and trying to get better so you can eventually love yourself – even if no one else does – is the greatest and loveliest thing you can do for yourself. You deserve that love, you exist and you live and you feel and that is a truly beautiful gift.

#uhm well anyway I hope everyone finds people and a place where they feel safe and loved #I'm feeling really emotional sorryy #basically. tldr; found the problem! trying to get better now through loving myself instead of hating myself #its been really hard. its going to be really hard. I feel like ive barely made any progress #I wish I had a therapist to talk about this stuff with. but I dont. #btw the uh root problem: finding out my mother was actually hugely abusive & I already knew my dad was #so basically ive been having to confront the fact that Ive been living a lie and my mother is actually deeply terrible as much as my dad #and my parents should have never had children & ive never had one single decent adult in my life #so basically uhm yea lol. I was born into dysfunction. I was never going to turn oit normal or okay. #so its been hard to like. figure all that out alone. learning I have ptsd and extreme ocd + dissociation because of them hasnt been easy #its made me so deeply miserable because I guess I assumed what my mom was doing to us was normal this whole time? #because I thought no. surely not. surely i cant have TWO terrible parents. I need at least 1 good one right? #but yea no actually every adult has hurt me in some way. and I was never going to turn out alright because #I am the king of obsessing and cycling over everything in my life #Im like. not okay right now but not being im in danger just because I wish I had someone to talk to about all this. #I just need to learn to drive so I can get out of here. I need to get out like #all these realizations have been really really heavy on me and ive been having trouble sleeping #Its been hard to process and I dont really know where to go from here. I guess I cant properly heal and grow until I move out? #idk this has been really long im so sorry. #vent #tw vent #tws -> #abuse ment #parents ment #<- in tags

[hawkeyedflame]

.

#im not vagueing anyone specific so if u think this is abt you don't get your underwear twisted okay this is about like. so many ppl. #but it's so fucking frustrating seeing people i know (friends/family/coworkers/etc) going thru so much mental health struggle #often accompanied by physical health issues like weight/skin/pain problems #and knowing their diet is absolutely dogtrash #and trying to come up with a way to tell them that is nice but will maybe get them to think or change their ways #i know i know. you can lead a horse to water and all but it's just fucking agonizing knowing that people are suffering so needlessly #and it would go away if they just put the right food in their bodies #and no this isn't even an injunction to carnivore you can recover significantly with meat-heavy noncarnivore ketogenic diets #but people are so resistant to the idea that they can eat their way out of mental illness even though this is well documented #it just makes me want to rip my hair out that people would really rather stay the same than try something that could make them better #like i really can't fucking relate the whole reason i ended up a carnivore is because i was so *desperate* to be healthy #and trying something for a month just to see sounds so much better than letting everything get worse until i'm literally dying #but then i see so many sick people with garbage diets just completely resist the suggestion that the solution could possibly be so simple #like what more can i do for you? i dont want you to be sick. YOU dont want you to be sick. what do you lose from just trying?? #ugh i cant. im so. i know this is going to be my career path but god fucking damn if it isn't infuriating

[olli-online]

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#finishes a happy show abt love by uncontrollably sobbing because imso fundamentally broken and past the point of being fixed that i cannot #love and receive love and dont feel at all deserving of even doing so #i cant trust fhat people love me itll always be in the back of my mind that its fake that its all a lie i cant accept that anybody could #believing that the only way someone could love me is if they were manipulated into doing so and imholding someone captive with the brutality #of who i am. i wish love made me sweet ans gentle and kind #its like ive locked away all thelove i have in a box but its rotting away and irs making that box heavy ans idk if i can carry it anymore #nevermind someone else. i dont want to crush ppl and suffocate them and yet its all ive ever been able to do #one day iwill find acceptance in being undeserving of it all but for now ill just continue to want and long and yearn #i hate desiring what i cannot have. i wish i was being hyperbolic. i wish i could just say its an episodebut i cant #ivelocked myself so far away out of reach that i dont think i coukd bring it back even if i desperately wanted to #it would be better if i had no love to give but its not true. i have so much love to give but no one id want to subject to carrying it #ishould sleep #anyway ghe show was nice before igot in my own head

[muslim-flint]

ikhwan werent kidding when they said having a haram bf Will fuck u up in a way or another . only got myself to blame but wouch oughf we're in a little bit of a pickle here boyz

#just venting but hey. its the way hes mine and someday won't be anymore and i'll never be loved that softly again 🥰🤪 fun FUCKING times #and hes not even here hes so far away. both a blessing (no Haram Premium business) #and a curse (my body feels heavy at all times bc hes not holding it :)). haha. myea #wanna know what hurts the most. the main problem is not even that hes not muslim. bc inshaAllah he will be someday ik hes getting there #no!!!the main problem is that we dont want the same life!!!and i will never ask him to stay for me!! #i will never ask him to not have kids!!for me!!!!BUT WAIT BC THE WORST IS NOT EVEN THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!! #the very worst is that hes NOT okay with it!!!!!!!!and i would deal with this shit so much better. if he accepted in his heart that this #is not meant to last. bc what it fucking means is that im probably the one who will have to leave him bc he'll never do it #idk idek when like god only knows but it fucking hurts in advance :))))) what did mitski said. you love me so hard and i still cant sleep #anyweh. just needed to let it out. stay away from love yall skfjdkdj shits DANGEROUS. trixie mattel voice they dont tell u that. #rizcore #lui