#but im not a trans man. so there r some Things that i just dont know about by virtue of not having experience with HRT

[orcelito]

Like OK so I've been reading a fic with trans wolfwood in it that is so. HONEST. About how it affected him and still affects him. In a way that's very much not an average cis writer portrayal of a trans character.

Like. Either this writer is trans or did plenty of research, but it just feels REAL to me. And it has me thinking about my own way of writing trans Wolfwood.

I'm not there yet. But I've been thinking about it. The ways that what the EOM did fucked him up... but it also acted as HRT that affirmed his gender. So what do you do when you're in a body you don't recognize, but looks much more like a man than ever before? There's some gender euphoria in a way, but dysphoria at the same time bc you didn't grow into this. You didn't watch yourself transition. Suddenly you just Were this, and it's not you, but also it's nice to finally be seen as a man, but it also feels wrong to feel grateful for any part of what they did to you...

On and on and on

You see? This is what I want to think about with him. This is why trans Wolfwood is so compelling to me. It's just so Complicated, he'd have such Complicated feelings about his body and the way he lives with it. He learns this new body, it starts to feel more like his, but he also mourns the fact that he didn't get to watch it grow into this like he should've.

That kind of thing.

#speculation nation #itnl shit #tagging it bc these r things relevant to itnl ww. because. he is trans☺️ #TRANS WOLFWOOD MY BELOVED!!!!!!!!!! #i wanna do more research into trans things. ive already done a lot. but like #into the actual physical side of it all. the effects of HRT. all those messy little details that people dont often focus on. #some months ago i skimmed thru this writing guide on how to write trans men. and i think i wanna revisit it #read it more slowly and thoroughly. #bc im confident in my ability to write trans characters. considering the fact that im not cis myself. #but im not a trans man. so there r some Things that i just dont know about by virtue of not having experience with HRT #so. research! supplementing my existing knowledge with the perspectives of the actual people im writing about. #and so it goes when ur writing about an experience that is not entirely your own. #it matters to me to make my writing of trans men as realistic as possible. #even with the messy details that people normally shy away from. Especially them. #i pride myself on my realism as much as is within my means of capturing it. #realistic emotions. realistic reactions. realistic bodies. #i am Going to write a trans wolfwood that is So realistic. as much as possible. #(i keep specifying ww with this even tho vash is trans also just bc vash is a bit more uhhhh not human lol #so the definition of what makes him trans is a bit more loose. still inferred by real life experiences #but he wouldnt have the same sorts of experiences with HRT. or gender expression in general #so i feel less of a pressure to capture it as fully accurate to the real life human experience as possible. if that makes sense.)

[trans-leek-cookie]

every day I lose sympathy for other trans men. Suffer in silence until you can be normal you stupid bitches

#STOP!!! BRINGING UP!!! TRANSFEMS!!!!! #GO ATTACK CIS MEN OR SOMETHING YOU STUPID CUNTS. ILL KILL YOU #or other trans men. I ❤️ infighting #Grabbing trans mens faces. Listen to transfems and shut the fuck up. You're still tme and are priveledged in comparison #Even if ppl see u as a woman and you don't receive most of the benefits a man receives. You're STILL NOT AFFECTED BY TRANSMISOGYNY!!!! #AND THATS A BIG FUCKING THING BC TRANSMYSOGYNY IS PERVASIVE NORMALIZED AND OFTEN ACTIVELY DANGEROUS!!! #YOU STILL EXPERIENCE TRANSPHOBIA AND POTENTALLY MISOGYNY!!! BUT YOU DONT EXPERIENCE TRANSMISOGYNY AND THATS VERY IMPORTANT #like. I still have shit I gotta unlearn but it's fucked up seeing the way other transmascs talk #Bc I grew up reading a lot of transfems perspectives. And the way trans men r centered n catered to and trans fems are excluded and further #Marginalized in a community thats supposed to be inclusive of them is 1. BAD 2. CONSISTENT!!! THIS HAS BEEN GOING ON FOR YEARS!!! #MEN AND AFAB TRANS PPL ARE CONSISTENTLY CENTERED!!! TRANS WOMEN ARE PUSHED OUT AND HURT!!! #ITS THE SAME SHIT BUT WITH SOME FANCY NEW WORDS!!!! IF YOU BELIEVE IN TRANSANDROPHOBIA/TRANSMISANDRY #IM JUST GOING TO STOMP ON UR RIBS I SWEAR TO GOD!!!!!!!! SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #I'm going to be so honest rn seeing other trans men be fucking shitty has actively affected my feelings Abt being a man. Like #I wanna be a man but do I wanna be in a community w these fuckers????

[snekdood]

sometimes it feels like ppl on here think ppl who are stern and assertive are shitty and its like... im sorry but ive been walked on all my life, if im not stern and assertive ppl treat me like shit. 

#being bubbly and smiley and welcoming has only welcomed people who want to use and abuse me into my life #id love to be if i didn't feel like people were going to manipulate my kindness #and its not lost on me that im treated like an asshole for this probably bc some ppl just see me as a grumpy hysterical half-woman #even trans ppl who would tell me they dont but show me they do still feel that way about me lmao #ppl rly aren't prepared to discuss how trans men are effected by misogyny in and outside of our communities #we're seen as essentially ugly unsavory women #the woman 'its okay to hate bc they're problematic in x way even iof they aren't we need to find a way all trans mascs r problematic' #'so we have an excuse to keep ostracizing them' #bc once you dismiss someone as a woman you hate whos problematic its a free for all. for some reason yall will let your masks down #entirely on allegedly problematic people who are percieved as women. #like yall are trying to get it all out as quick as you can on trans men on how misogynistic you can be so then you can go 'well ur a man so #u dont experience misogyny lololol gotem anyways lets keep treating them like how society treats women they hate' #and then once it becomes mainstream that its not cool to hate all dudes including transmascs whom you've decided are somehow worse than cis #men- yall will slide into the shadows pretending you didn't do shit or contribute to shit going on here #but if brought up- you'll panic and scramble to find reasons to justify ur behavior. recycling problematic things those transmascs #supposedly did that are either dated and have been addressed and the person has changed or changed their mind since then or #shit thats been disproven and was never real to begin with #and yall dont want to sit in the silence acknowledging what u did at all so you'll keep deflecting and ignoring it forever #bc facing the reality that you've hurt someone for some reason is really hard for ppl on here

[breedable-bunnyblue]

Uh idk how this works but i guess this is my limits or DNI list Plus introduction idfk

18+ only Blog

avatar is a picrew until i maybe draw something else up myself

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i have an amazon wishlist now, if you want to buy me anything I'll leave a tag to its location

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So uh hi im Blue , He/Him 22 submissive generally speaking.

I'm trans gay male do not post any of my posts on WLW blogs or any post involving women.

IM NOT A FUCKIN LESBIAN STOP REBLOGGING ME ON YOUR LESBIAN ACCOUNT/Mendonotinteract ACCOUNT FFS

Do not interact with my blog if:

you are a minor

you are a woman yes trans women that includes you. you are women. why do you keep asking me if you can interact 😭 (NBs/genderflud people are fine i keep getting asks)

you are WLW or are exclusive attracted to women

you are a Straight man

you are a Detrans kink blog

blank blogs are gonna get blocked

if you are any of those you will be immediately blocked just leave my account alone, if you dont list age or if you dont list anything in bio ect you will be blocked

Do not make any comments or asks or whatever about

R*pe/ SA

Scat or piss play

detrans/forced fem

knife play/gun play (at least not with actual cutting or anything that's an absolute no)

incest

pedo shit

zoos

( pretty much anything illegal or gross just keep it away from me ty)

Stuff im into

(R- receiving G-giving)

Breeding breeding breeding breeding 🥴🥴🥴 (r)

pregnancy in the way of getting knocked up or like roleplaying it for a scene but not actually wanting to get pregnant? if that makes sense 😅

Monster fucking

Cnc (r/g)

bdsm

edging (r/g)

public sex/public play (in theory never tried)

being tied up/restrained (r/g)

intoxication? / weed (in theory never tried)

Regency (prince/knight)

i think i have a mommy kink ☠️ (as in being called mommy ((but I AM MALE THIS IS NOT IN A DETRANS OR ANY OTHER WAY OTHER THAN FOR SOME FUCKING REASON MY DICK THINKS ITS HOT))

power bottoming if im in the mood

puppy doms/tops (i have a extreme horny fuckinf idEK it makes me really wet to think of calling a guy puppy)

daddy kink slightly but no DDLB/Age play (as in calling somone daddy PLEASE DONT CALL ME THAY DJDJSK)

pet names like Bunny, angel, kitten,ect are all good (you can try others with me if you'd like ill tell you if i dont like them)

slight doctor kink? (r)

hucow kink/milking but i dont post about it cuz im embarrassed the only way you get that out of me is DM or private asks (r)

sending nudes (srs if you want some just ask)

honestly itd probably be faster to just write things that dont turn me on

Asks are welcome though!! (pl EAs E) anon or not, feel free to send me messages there. 👉👈

*** general about me

like videogames (Bloodborne is my favorite)

music taste generally Alt or emo (MCR, Peirce the veil, low roar, the entirety of the Bloodborne soundtrack, idk i listen to a lot of music and just dont know the bands but vibe with it)

I have pets, if you want to send me animal pictures thats cool we can trade. (2 dogs, 3 cats, 2 parakeets)

i have chronic pain and migraines, lots of health issues but thats likely to stay off the blog unless i think of something horny about it.

Free Palestine 🇵🇸

#wishlist link #Me #<pics #monster kink #ftm ns/fw #mlm nsft #ftm nsft #send nsft asks #t4t nsft #send naughty asks #ftm breeding #ftm bottom #power bottom #ftm power bottom

[gayhenrycreel]

#ftm is a fetish tag

disclaimer, i am a trans man

#ftm is a fetish tag. i dont know if its always been like this but it is a problem.

i can hardly find any transmascs in that tag.

there are cis women misgendering trans men as a kink, and talking about our bodies like sex dolls everywhere in that tag. its mostly cishet women using OUR tag to objectify our bodies because they are too afraid to consider that they might not be straight. it is at least half detransition kink. im very uncomfortable with cis people doing this, but if they want to i wont stop them.

but this is in OUR TAG. this is horrible. they write disgusting smut about women who are short twinks with soft tits and dripping cunts and no dysphoria at all.

they just call them trans men.

ive seen other transmascs complain about this too.

these fics are written by and for cis women. they are chasers. the way they talk about our bodies is revolting. they know nothing about trans men at all.

i know that not all trans men feel dysphoric about their bodies, but these women are still treating us like a fetish that only occurs in fiction, rather than people who have emotions and often want to have a flat chest and/or a penis.

in particular they fetishize gay trans men. all these fics are about femboys who are horrified by the concept of transitioning getting fucked by bears. the people writing this view transitioning as mutilation. its very obvious.

ive noticed that this occasionally extends to fetishizing cis men with gynecomastia. its clear they want to fuck women but think lesbians are disgusting, so they call the women in their fics men, but misgender them throughout the text.

i hardly see any representation for trans men who even want to transition. newsflash: a lot of us do want to transition. many of us have already had surgery.

if you genuinely do want to write smut with GOOD portrayal of trans men, heres some tips on what we want in our representation:

trans men who dont want to transition deserve rep too, but many of us are entirely uncomfortable with our bodies. very few of us want any attention given to the parts we are born with. a lot of pre op trans men wear a binder during sex. we're not all bottoms, and some of us wear strap ons.

when we're on testosterone, it causes vaginal atrophy, similar to menopause. it gets very dry down there and easily irritated. this means that vaginal sex can be very painful and could even damage tissues. even without T, vaginal penetration is usually no where near as fun as it is for cis women. anything being in there is awful and sometimes painful.

anal sex is a thing. its not gross. its perfectly normal. it just requires some lubricant, and for a trans man, is a lot more comfortable than vaginal sex.

shockingly, most of us do not want to be called girls.

dont misgender a trans person in a sex scene. at all. some of us like to be called good boys during sex. stop calling us girls.

some of us have had surgery. it is NOT mutilation. it is life saving. top surgery is one that we get most frequently. the results do look just like a cis mans chest. there are long thin scars under the pecs, but these fade after a few years. they may not even be visible. bottom surgery exists too.

metoidioplasty creates a micropenis out of the clitoris. it does look real. it looks like a regular micropenis. it has full sensation.

phalloplasty uses a flap of skin, usually from the forearm, and turns it into a penis. this surgery is more complex and is done in multiple stages. after it is complete, it looks like a circumcised penis. its size is dependent on the flap of skin used to make it, so it can actually be larger than average. (on r/phallo someone even got a reduction surgery because his dick was 7 inches long). the area the skin flap was taken from has pretty big scarring. it looks like the result of a severe burn. it is sometimes covered by a tatoo. there is a lot of misinformation about phalloplasty. it is a big surgery, but it is no where near as dangerous as the internet would have you believe. after it has fully healed it does look real, and a genital nerve is usually hooked up to the penis. it can take a while to heal (years), but after a few months sensation begins to return as the nerves heal. the clitoris is often buried in the base of the penis, and if a genital nerve hook up is done the penis can have full sensation, including the tip. not everyone gets full sensation, and it can take years for sensation to fully return, but 93% of men who get phalloplasty are satisfied with the results. that is a lot. it is quite rare that sensation is fully lost, so yes, you can orgasm after phalloplasty. one thing to note is that a phalloplasty penis cant get hard on its own. there are two types of implant for erections. one is a rod inside the penis, which can last over 20 years before needing a replacement. the rod is flexible, so can be positioned as an erection. the other implant is a internal pump that is more complicated than the rod, and needs to be replaced roughly every 15 years. it is filled with water and sits inside the penis. to get an erection, you squeeze one of the testicles, which is a pump implant, pushing the water into the penis, causing an erection.

most importantly, we are men. we can be feminine. we can be masculine. we can look exactly like cis men. dont forget that we are people, we are real. we are not some sex fantasy.

#ftm #trans #transexual #transgender #surgery #top surgery #metoidioplasty #phalloplasty #fanfic #mlm #t4t #detrans #queer

[deeism]

i dont always go for (cis) genderbent art depending on the context and how its pulled off, but always sunny genderbends r honestly very interesting and cool to me regardless of what they look like (whether they make characters cis or trans or whatever). and i think its because all of the characters have very specific interpretations of gender roles and its fun to think about how that might differ or stay the same

per my last reblog i really like the idea of girl!mac's dad hating her because she was supposed to be born a boy and her trying to fit into that role while also navigating what her gender means to her personally..... there is so MUCH to think about there. similarly i see people talk about dennis as being transfem because it makes you look at a lot of her character aspects very differently (e.g. her very deeply internalized misogyny and sexism) idk i could make a whole separate post about the connotations that come w transfem dennis because i do think people dont necessarily think about all of them. but i do like that interpretation and i think its interesting to reexamine those traits through an entirely different lens. i've seen people headcanon frank as a trans man which is honestly real as fuck to me. but the point im getting at here is that Because gender is so relevant in at least some way or another to every member of the gang you can kind of do anything with how you view their gender (whether its cisgender or not) and it still tells you a lot about their character and the way they view the world. im not saying this isnt something that applies to other characters in other shows because gender roles tend to be deeply relevant in a lot of things and turning them on their heads in any way can be fun. there's just something specific about sunny that i enjoy and im glad so many of us think about it lol idk.

#i didnt even talk about dee because i wouldve just gone on forever. i will make a seperate post talking about dee reynolds and gender #at some point #it's always sunny in philadelphia #iasip #mac mcdonald #dennis reynolds #frank reynolds #genderbends

[lovelyrotter]

I read your thing about stridercest. I didn’t super like the ship (I’m more of a lalondecest girlie) but I respect the hell out of the textual analysis you did. Anyway do you have any good fic recommendations? I want to see what you see in it.

oh fuck yeah i love sharing ship stuff especially with ppl who dont usually go here and vice versa for me. its like hell yeah im digging in sand and its fun i love my sand and then i turn around and woah i had no idea there was even MORE sand just behind me ya dig? that might not have made any sense hahaha. its the joy of trading pokemon cards except with ships

but okay heres some of my current faves. bear in mind i read mostly M and E rated stuff but ive got a sprinklin of lower ratings in here too. im also gonna categorize this list by stridercest flavour. theres a lot so this turned out like ridiculously long

anyone else goin through this feel free to link yalls faves in the replies too cause im ravenous. especially if its haldirk. im constantly craving haldirk

guardiancest

doku line terminus & two steps away from the county line by lildogie these first cause theyre my ultra faves rn and i cant get enough of this au. set in the same universe but county line is the prequel. a/b/o verse with lotsa interesting political stuff and also interpersonal dynamics. dave & dirk are there too and are real cute. its also got mysterious time travelling. i really cant sell these two enough like i am not doin these justice

davedirk / dirkdave

if i woke up next to you by bumbly | G, ~2,700 words, complete. SUPER sweet relationship study, made me fuckin melt. this author has really good stuff for other ships too but mind the archive warnings

dont joke about hentai face broctopus transplants im eating cheese n onion pringles here by smrtnik | M, ~1k words, complete. this one made me fuckin melt its so tender. it truly feels like were peeking into their life together. also great title

Stasis State by Caeslin | T, ~3k words, complete. another really intimate feeling one. its so fuckin sweet. mind the tags for typical dirk suicide attempt but its not on screen its moreso the recovery and how dave is affected by it

“stupid fucking bullshit” ad nauseam by anon | T, 13.7k words, complete. REALLY GOOD AU. trans striders, fade to black sex scene. the boys are cute and you can feel how much theyre drawn to each other immediately. wish there was more of this

sometimes the bad guy wins by nutrimercenary | E, ~7.5k words, ongoing. wow. oh wow. ive been looking for a davedirk fic like this for a long time. PLEASE read the warnings and tags but its so fuckin good. a crossdimentional narrative tug-o-war between dave and ult dirk i fuckin love it

got it goin on by bumbly | E, 7.5k words, complete. dirk indulges daves mommy kink after prying it outta him. its cute and funny and sexy it made me smile. their dynamic is sooo sweet

helping hands by ghostlyAnarchist | E, 5.1k words, complete. THIS IS SO GOOD. its got trans man dave and is genuinely one of the hottest transmasc fics ive read so far and boy howdy ive read a lot. slight warning for dysphoria discussion but its not too bad its all just hot af a dick-sucking venn diagram by Elendraug | E, 10k words, complete. first off domestic af. very established relationship and you can tell. its so fuckin sweet. i looove this one. its like the best kind of silly realistic smut its one of my faves of all time

STILL WITH ME by egbert | E, 8k words, complete. dave and dirk strife and then fuck in the bathroom. holy shit this is hot. their want is like tangible in this one

brodave and a!brodirk

hardware by orphan_account | E, ~8k words, complete. dave gets some dick piercings and bro goes insane about them. hot as hell and also features bottom bro which is my fave. its got a couple uses of the r-slur but its also from 2011 so i take it w/ a grain of salt. 2011 and earlier fics are like internet artifacts (/pos)

but you better never pull it by hapaxlegomena | E, 5k words, complete. wow. WOW. sub top bro and dom bottom dave need i say more. this sub bro activates my cute aggression the power play is great mars & murrie's by orphan_account | E, 6.8k words, complete. a!brodirk, omorashi. super hot!!!! alpha dave is sooo embarrassed about his piss kink but dirk wins in the end hahaha. really intriguing which i know sounds funny on an omo fic but read it and youll know. i love this alpha dave

temporal sunset by Plajus | M, 19.5k over 5 chapters, complete. a!brodirk. holy shit what a ride. this one held me hostage and now lives in my brain rent free (bdum tiss sorry). dirk is terminally ill so i know it wont be for everyone but give it a try and goddamn you wont be disappointed. trust me

a swinging pendulum by ghostlyAnarchist | T, ~900 words, complete. a!brodirk time/dream bubble encounter. wow just wow. the want. the yearning immaterial by LPSunnyBunny | E, 1k words, complete. a!brodirk, trans dirk. holy shit!!!!!! holy shit!!!!! hot hot hot!!!!!!! shower sex sensation control!!!!

haldirk

singular by 2x2verse | E, 6.8k words, complete. hal has an existential crisis dirk catches him and then they fuck tenderly about it. genuinely so romantic. im addicted to this kind of haldirk. honestly i just recommend the entire series diagnostics by 2x2verse | E, 2.9k words, complete. i know i just linked this authors whole collection of haldirk fics but holy crap this one in particular. dom/sub electrostim with sensory deprivation, hal is the dom. i LOVE how hes written here. very attentive domming, great details

A Fatal Error Has Occurred by Mortior | E, 42k words, 4/5 chapters. oh mortior my haldirk regent. really fuckin good character writing in an au where hal has an android body before the alpha session is started. read the tags for warnings. the tension between them is insane endangered by Mortior | E, 100k+ words, complete multichapter. holy fuck where to begin with this one. this is a haldirk sensation. post apocalyptic au where androids won the human-robot war. dirk runs into AR. AR takes an interest in him. dirk takes even more of an interest in AR. if youre gonna read any haldirk read this one

"im basically fucking him" series by Elendraug | T & E, all complete. so!!!!! fucking!!!!! tender!!!!! really cute haldirk progressing through their relationship

ridiculously late by cinnamonfreak | E, 21k, completed multichapter. a/b/o au where dirk suddenly presents. REALLY intriguing hal in this one i fuckin love the power play

roboporn by smrtnik | E, 3.9k words, complete. really fun power play in this one. hal is waterproofed externally but not internally. he gives dirk a handie over his open chassis torso. theres also really sweet snuggling afterwards

#stridercest #guardiancest #davedirk #dirkdave #haldirk #my t #fic rec #theres so many whoops HAHAHAHA #this ask made me really happy though im glad my post caught your eye #like that made me so jazzed

[mueritos]

Hey. Idk if this is me growing up or just being disillusioned with inter celebs etc. Im a 23 yr old trans man so I grew up and was inspired by chella on the YouTube community. But now I just…don’t like chella man anymore. I feel like…he became an industry plant? Over the pandemic asking fans for money to send to him directly to help others and not showing where the money was going exactly incident as well as just becoming older I noticed he seemed to almost want to become the next Keith haring or basquiat? He almost…now seems very fake? He takes deals with brands to be representation but doesn’t do much to call out certain brands for their faults etc.

Idk anymore

I give Chella credit in that he was one of the few transmen that I looked up while I was young, especially with him being BIPOC. Showing him to my family helped them understand me. But that's where the inspiration kinda stops, because it was painful to be surrounded by years-in-transition trans men online when I was absolutely nowhere I wanted to be. That was a me problem tho. But I also didn't know much about his whole donation incident.

Ig heres what I have to say. It's not great to view other people as your justification of your morals. We don't know how people have had to live or how they live now, we don't know what decisions they have to make, and we dont know what kind of fears or goals they have. Chella is allowed to do whatever he wants with his art or his modelling career, just like how I genuinely believe anyone else in the world is capable of making the right decisions for themselves (even if we dont like those decisions!). Im not really concerned with figuring out if hes an industry plant or a "class traitor" (lol) or even if he's "fake". To be honest, I'm all for BIPOC folks getting their $. Does that mean I enjoy seeing wealthy BIPOC folk perpetuate classism and racism? No. Just cuz someone is succeeding for themselves doesn't mean people cant critique them. I guess what Im saying is I see waaay too many people online take the things they enjoy and the people they follow as projections of their morals: "no! stop [Insert celebrity name] you're being problematic and its makes us fans look bad!" Like....Okay lmfao. People are grown adults and are going to make decisions for themselves. Just because you might enjoy a celebrity does not mean your morals are based on how good of a person they are.

and youre allowed to not like the same things anymore just like how people are allowed to change, for better or for worse. I think within online communities there is way too much pressure on "looking" like a good person versus actually being one...because sometimes BEING a good person makes you look absolutely vile in terms of online spaces/communities love of isolating, removing, and deleting "problematic" (and vulnerable) people from their spaces with no trial, discussion, or attempt at conflict mediation. Yea yea I do think people have every right to be criticized just as they have every right to make whatever decision they want, but what Im trying to get at is to really stop viewing anyone with a platform as someone you can other once they dont meet your standards. This is not the same as denouncing or critiquing someone for really egregious behavior (white supremacy, harrassment, bullying, interpersonal violence). Once you kinda start living by your own morals without needing other people's actions/behaviors to justify/define them, you learn to focus on building connections rather than destroying them.

again, this is a much nuanced topic and you prolly werent expecting me to go into this. but ive grown over the years and have engaged in some nasty and vile mob mentality behavior that i just dont vibe with anymore. im not really the kind of person now to speculate online or publicly what other people are doing or should be doing or whether theyre problematic or not. I don't really care about Chella man or most celebrities rn. People r just gonna be people, and I will always have empathy for those of marginalized identities. Free will, autonomy, and self determination goes both ways, but so does accountability, transformative justice, and reconciliation.

but also like kill ur idols lol

#muertoresponds #like yea its fun having people u follow and look up to man #does it take a lot of time to be following celebrities #there would be days i would just check up on all my micro celebrities #now i just dont give a fuck #theyre people im people we're people #we're all gonna change and do bad and do good #i dont like holding myself or anyone anymore to these fucked up online standards of looking like good people #idc idc idc #this was def not the answer u prolly wanted but its where im at and thats what i gotta say #have ur micro celebrities if u want but like yea #people r people #and so are u #critiques r valid but u cant hold anyone accountable unless they consent to be held accountable #like being held accountable means u choose to be part of the accountability process #not make a lil 5 min notes app apology and be forgotten about in a week because people find their next target #yadda yadda yadda #these r my thoughts

[doberbutts]

i get *why* a lot of people think men dont face oppression for being men, cause i only just started learning about it myself but the insistence that trans men's oppression is not affected by us being men is so???? its confusing to me. also i started talking to my cis man friends about emotions lately and its like, my god how could people NOT know men have issues that r related to them being men? i know im telling you nothing new im just, very baffled and dont have anyone to express this to irl

Oh I was just talking to a friend about this.

I think what honestly happened is that a lot of trans mascs are and were feminists prior to transitioning. I think a lot of them continued to believe that male privilege meant that you had no problems caused by being men until, one day... they were viewed as men. And then suddenly they went 'hey... this sucks actually'.

Extreme isolation? Oh cis men have huge amounts of lonliness and touch starvation and isolation problems. Not being allowed to discuss their problems? Yeah because otherwise you're weak, feminine, female, not man enough. Not allowed to show their emotions? Everyone knows men are only allowed two emotions: horny and angry. Hideous body dysmorphia? Multiple, multiple studies have said that the majority of gym bros have serious untreated eating disorders.

There's more but what's weird is that there are still versions of feminism talking about this. Feminists who understood that the emotional abandonment of young boys and allowing patriarcal society to sink its claws into them is what creates the problem of men who behave abysmally. It was very important in some feminist circles to teach their sons it was okay to cry, it was okay to want to be touched and held, it was okay to struggle, it was okay to like pink and dolls and dresses and makeup and it didn't make you lesser just for not aligning yourself with the patriarchy.

I'm just kind of wondering... where that went. We did at some point recognize that men do experience a gendered suffering of their own, and that raising young boys to break free of this ritualized suffering would only aid the cause of having women seen as equals to men.

Why did we stop doing that? Why did we veer into what we are now? This hurts cis people of all genders. This hurts trans people of all genders. Did no one read that op-ed about how that trans woman refuses to come out of the closet specifically because of the way she has been spoken to and about, to her face, because she's being read as a man??? Does no one realize that this is hurting people??? The people they're claiming to want to protect???

Maybe I see it so much because I'm gay, so I occupy cis gay male spaces a *lot*, and I see these men suffering in ways they can't share with anyone else. Maybe I see it because I hang out with my black male relatives all the time, and I see them experience things and hurt and not be able to talk about it.

[astxrwar]

some of the transmasc! mig hcs rub me the wrong way. ranting transgenderishly abt it. sorrie

1. why are so many ppl defaulting to giving him top surgery scars. look at his body shape, his hips are narrow and his shoulders are broad and he’s over 6’5 lmao. dude would have been on blockers then T as an early teenager. you don’t need top surgery then. unless you construct a narrative where he went off of T for like… at least a year (but probably longer) without getting a complete hysterectomy first then this makes no sense.

it just feels like ppl dont know that much abt transmasc experiences we r not all the same and top surgery scars r not just a thing you slap on to trans someone, not all of us require top surgery + cis guys get top surgery too? just giving uneducated

2. also the fact that it seems like it just doesn’t ever occur to ppl that trans men get bottom surgery. ig that’s an in general issue but why does it seem like every hc’ed trans man character always has a pussy. plenty of us have dicks bro it just feels fetish-y. plenty of us only pass on surgery bc it’s A Lot but it’s 2099 so that’s going to be less of an issue,,, specific to miguel like. why is nobody giving him bottom surgery scars like the fact that there’s not an equal or even rly existing rep for that in a world where getting it would be INFINITELY easier makes me uncomfy it’s rly giving ‘trans men as men-lite” energy

3. also for written content same deal why is nearly every trans guy hced as one who doesn’t get bottom surgery and why is there always SO MUCH focus on specifically using the word pussy. like bitch! an example of a common thing for transmascs: i dew naught even write fem!RC content using that word i avoid almost all fem-genitalia words bc they’re extremely uncomfy to me, and that phenomenon amongst trans men is even more common than trans men who have had bottom surgery. so we have an excess of content focusing on ‘guy with pussy’ and very little if any content even just recognizing a significant amount of trans men r not okay with that terminology n often do not even like engaging their natal anatomy beyond their dicks (significant number of us also use this word and not the other one! btw!!) during sex. n ppl don’t want to write abt this bc it doesn’t fit the fetish!! im doing murder!!

4. i saw someone ranting wrt trans!mig abt how ppl make male characters transmasc to make mlm ships “less gay” wrt: sex and its just like. im going to kill u too! trans men get bottom surgery bro trans men have dicks! plenty of the ones that don’t just straight up do not do PIV! way to hit the nail on the head wrt fandoms seeing trans men as men-lite lmao and way to miss the opportunity for criticism of fandom transphobia by just. validating that perception of trans men.

idk im just so tired where is my trans miguel no top surgery scars (bc he clearly got T at puberty onset) + with bottom surgery scars content :/ arm scar from the nerve + torso scar from the graft, it’s 2099 they’ve probably perfected skin expanders atp so it would just be like. one scar instead of the scar + stretched area but like. i digress. can we please have trans men with dicks content Ever? the abject lack of it kinda feels like left wing version of rw “c*ntboy” fetishism lol. im going to make some myself bc it is an outlet to deal with my Frustration abt this and explore how all trans ppl have different transitions narratively and counter the reductive fandom goggles perception of us. in general i wish the majority of ppl just didn’t do trans hcs until it stops just being a clear and obvious extension of fetishization and stereotyping. throttling ppl biting and maiming and tearing

also like there’s so many ppl who just think trans men who get bottom surgery r gross but won’t admit it and they especially shan’t see the light of heaven and should stop even thinking abt trans men at all <3

#it just feels like. ‘omg guy with pussy 😍😍’ #and im killing u with a big rock if u think this way abt trans men #bc not only do men get bottom surgery a lot of us dont use that shit at all even if we dont! #just. sigh. the way that i feel like trans fetishism is two-pronged #comes from ppl who profess to hate us but also from ppl who profess support. and like. why. be normal pls. #astxrwar.txt #miguel o'hara

[randysworld2009]

Dude listen up in gonna yap a lot here hehe :33

randy ppl are hating on ya man.. apologize quick and BETTER.. before I let out my fucking rage to you lol. ngl im just tryna be nice to u like usual. I mean, you should... not use the L move called "apologize and then talk to them again" ITS NOT GONNA WORK BRAH HOLD YA HORSES- 😭😭 YOU SHOULD SHOULD SHOULD NOT talk to any accounts you apologized to since they all need time to REMOVE YA WEIRD ACTS.. UR SO CRINGY TBH BUT I KNOW U STILL HAVE ACTUAL GOOD THING IN YOU 😭😭😭😭😭😭

You may not notice it but u are making people uncomfortable....!1!1 you act like me when I was 9 and just touched internet for first time!!! 👁👄👁 oh my god... I saw a google doc full of what u did and its just so silly why r u doing all this lmao- 💀💀Id surprised if you have friends. NOT to be rude or anything, since ur nice to me, why not try act nice to otehr ppl too? maybe, keep the swearing and sillay slurs off your texts or smth... who taught you all that?? 💀😭 Boi ur acting transphobic and homophobic.. maybe you should stop swearing using slurs or saying stuff like "DIE ASSHOLE" or smth-

PLEASE DONT GET OFFENDED IM SOSOSOSRRY IF I HURT YOU BY THIS SHIT IM TYPING TO YOU THIS IS JUST SOME REMINDER I STILL GIVE YOU A CHANCE TO BE BETTER DAWG. Im concerned for u, you dont act like a human u act like some ai thats still underconstruction. I mean, ur acting weird so, if u need smth to talk about Ill be tehre for ya anyway. thanks for reading this thing I wrote randyy :D

fine.......y'all won......i support trans rights......forever

[fecto-forgo]

top 5 robot characters

ok brain do noooot fail me now lets recall some cool robots.also ive decided to rate them on both how much i like them n how interesting i find the usage of them being robots.tho apology before hand it seems two robots who r only those in quotes due to technicalities made their way in

5.five pebbles (rain world)

ok so i love pebbles V dearly.character i heavily sympathize w, frankly one of my only favorites who actually expresses regret over doing bad things.that being said.hes.hes a giant computer im only letting him in here bc the iterator puppets border on being robots, n i think the way theyre used is cool! its a rly neat way of making iterators able to communicate w the player n the way theyre kinda puppeteered around by that giant arm is rly cool.but again barely counts.thin ice buddy.if anything moons a bit cooler bc she lost most of the computer part yeah actually pretend shes in the title of the entry too my girl deserves it.she put up w sm.

4.susie (kirby)

susie.is a weird case where.idk man we just dont know! shes a robot *to me* but ive seen ppl treat her like a cyborg some other mechanical being or straight up just some fucked up looking alien.n theres not a lot of robot thingies going on w her either.this always disappointed me a bit so its my lifes work to make my susie gijinka as explicitly a robot as possible.that being said still got no explanation for how she eats.shes just superior ig

3.metatton (undertale)

the trans allegory w how his body was made perfect for him n he loves it is rly cool but its been literally nearly a decade since my undertale phase so i sadly have lost a lot of my attachment, hes a rly entertaining character n all of his designs r rly good (someone saying they were struggling w beating his boss bc they were scared of their mom walking in on them fighting him n having to explain why the robot has such sexy legs lives in my head rent free) (also neo deserved better?? im still mad toby made it a fake out comedic fight </3)

2.gir (invader zim)

i have to obligatorily bring up gir bc.cmon this is a 2000s scene girl blog.he just has such a cute little design n bc its a cartoon its all squishy n stretchy n its so fun.that being said.idk i just dont have a lot of robot centered points to give him hes just a nifty little man made out of rubber metal

honorable mention:metal sonic (sonic)

i cant go without reminding everyone my boy exists.cmon its metal sonic.tragic guy ever.trapped in a narrative in a cell of capitalism bc any development to him would change too much from the status quo.i love him.his design is so fun its such a neat way to make a robotic sonic.his counterparts like chaos n shard n all the other robot sonic models all got cool points too ! great guy

1.cyn (murder drones)

ik ik i just bought her up i have her in my icon i kin her this is a safe blog for painfully biased ppl.but the reason cyn of all the drones wins number one spot for me is bc of how she moves n talks ! being a zombie drone she doesnt seem to function properly, shes constantly fixing her head from falling over n walking around a bit cowered n generally seems her movements dont flow naturally, she announces her actions while doing them (likely bc of some error from the zombie thing just making her naturally do that) n fully borrows her voice from the absolute solver (likely bc of some issue w her own) n generally the fact shes a robot that accidentally rebooted after being discarded n is clearly not running as intended is rly visible n i love it !!! i love robot characters whose roboticism is extremely relevant to their whole character instead of just being a quirky design thing.n ofc this all also resembles how puppets move which is such a fun double meaning thing to how shes the absolute solvers first host

#ask

[monstertsunami]

WAIT TELL ME ABOUT TRANS FEM YURA (hcs him as the opposite)

YESSSS THE MOST IMPORTANT ASK OF THE CENTURYY

i have a looottt of thoughts about yura and repression.. like there is no doubt abt it hes already a repressed bisexual just add some unaddressed gender feelings in there and its. the perfect mixture.

like a LOT of my lgbt feelings for pafl revolve around the environment that theyre all in, which is. generally not very good.. misogynistic and homophobic and you know. with all the toxic masculinity that comes with that. im kind of interpreting this all as the source for sergei's weird stoic toxic masculinity, nikitas misogyny, and yura's.. everything because! these things dont exist in a vaccum! these characters were raised in Not Good environments that fostered these behaviors and that is fucking interesting!! it adds depth to headcanons!!

(this is why i dont really pay much mind to pafl trans headcanons that r compliant to canon genders bc personally i believe their character arcs would be heavily affected by transitioning in that environment.. i save that all for post-canon funsies yk. other than olya who is mysterious enough to stealth and temnova whos too cool for gender obv)

anyways anyways anyways. yura is the most repressed thing out there he copes by dating around and evey other vice known to man bc he wants to be so fucking normal and deep down he KNOWWS he isnt.. good lord. he just wants to completely ignore all his gender and sexuality feelings so bad like. theres something fucking wrong with him jesus christ im going to hit him with a car. god. hold on i have a source

YURA WOULD YOU LIKE TO SHARE WITB THE CLASS WHO WOULD BE GOOD FOR SANYA. A GIRL PERHAPS. cough cough. he has so many fucking complexes about romance and sex. he sleeps around bc thats what HE sees as important in the male ideal (alongside stoicism bc we all know how well that went for him) and he is fighting tooth and nail to try and be a guy and repress anything that might suggest otherwise. body dysphoria is complete hc but tell me it wouldnt fit seamlessly with his character.. guy (girl) that hates himself so so fucking much

#i probably have . more thoughts than that but i am running on 3 hrs of sleep o7 #i might come back to this when im more coherent.. #btw if you wanted to know. transmasc butch sanya transmasc ace katya transmasc butch sergei #transfem olya and temnova but this is known #OH AND . TRANSFEM DIMAAAA!!! #either way on dima works flawlessly i believe in temnova helping him transition during his time in the facility #(<-transmasc dima i didnt clarify) #and olya helping hook him up w hormones when he escapes.. ough #*pats dima* this autistic thing can fit so much transgenderism in this #the good pafl end is where everyone comes to terms w their gender and transitions freely #boss makes a dollar i make a dime thats why i answer asks on company time #schizobabble #pafl #yura #pafl yura #OH MY GOD I MEANT TRANSFEM BUTCH SERGEI I CANT EDIT TAGS OR REARRANGE THEMMM

[cruelsister-moved2]

hi im not reblogging ur post bc i like to keep my blog lighthearted but i wanna thank you for calling out bad behaviour in the community while still acknowledging that trans men can have experiences with misogyny and less power than cis men. i see so many posts lacking this kind of nuance (in either direction) and seeing your post was a breath of fresh air also youre so right

aw thank you i appreciate this<3 i think we get a ton of crossed wires because when trans men are held accountable for misogyny they feel like they're having their own understanding of misogyny invalidated and being told that they have to choose between being a man and being a good person. the thing is, you can understand misogyny just fine and still benefit from it. i posted a great article a while back about how men in gender studies and women's studies can demonstrate an extremely in-depth understanding of misogyny and yet still benefit from & even perpetuate it.

the point i was trying to make is that misogyny isn't just men saying bad things and it isn't just men being inexplicably evil in some way. it's a system we all live in, and marginalised people are also capable of upholding it for their own gain (or just passively benefiting from it without even knowing) even when it's not in their best interests in the grand scheme of things.

tbh i feel like where 99% of people go wrong is not understanding trans men as like, just another type of marginalised man? we KNOW that marginalised men's access to male privilege is conditional and situational and usually it means power over marginalised women in exchange for obedience to white heteropatriarchy. it feels like we r constantly being roped into a childish debate over whether trans men are essentially identical to white cishet men, or are they something which is shaped like a man but doesnt actually function like a man in society in any way.

and the thing is... a man isn't an essential thing. manhood is a jealously guarded institution of privilege. marginalised men often find themselves defending in the hopes of gaining access to it, and sometimes in some contexts they do. there aren't monolithic male and female experiences. black men can know what it's like to be afraid to walk down the street, disabled men can know what it's like to have your reproductive freedom restricted, gay men can know what it's like not to be seen as a man at all. i dont like the conversations where both sides are trying to sort people into static victim/perpetrator categories. so for one side, examples of victimhood prove they can't be perpetrators and for the other, examples of perpetration prove they can't be victims. i feel like the fact that certain trans men's response to these conversations is "well im not perceived as a man/don't access white male cishet privilege in xyz situation" shows a fundamental misunderstanding of what privilege even is. it's all very essentialist!!

#ask #anon #and the thing is the vast majority of the women in this conversation are gay/bi/trans #we're talking about like. how it relates to us #like i would encourage men in these conversations not to assume we're saying you dont experience oppression or something just because we #arent constantly mentioning it #like im often saying things abt how gay men relate to me as a lesbian where im like #taking homophobia as a shared baseline thats a given we dont need to address in this case. u know? #if it was a cishet woman she would need to make concessions to that point. but demanding the same from a l/b/t woman would be kind of .. #exactly the thing i was talking about like assuming we don't understand those experiences too etc etc #so i appreciate that u understood that was what i was putting down even though i wasnt really gentle abt how i said it bc i was pissed off #and in a hurry dfghdg

[sentientgopro]

Hey y'all, not exactly active on here, especially when talking about myself, but I really need to get some shit off my chest right now. I had a couple realisations yesterday that culminated in some shit I never thought I would be saying or thinking.

I never thought I could be anything but straight. I liked women, so I mustve been straight. Im definately an advocate for everyone giving their gender true consideration, even when most will come out the other side cis, and confidently so, as did I.

Then I realised I didn't like women in the way most straight guys do. Afer clearing up some prior misconceptions about Aromanticism and asexuality, I realised those two labels fit me perfectly. But sometimes I wonder why I still feel a certain way about girls. There's just something about the way they look that's appealing to me, even if I dont find girls attractive...

Oh shit. That wasn't attraction. That was envy.

So that train of thought kind of went from 0 to 10 real fucking fast. This realisation brought to my attention feelings that Ive had for a good while, but have passed off as r/196 induced brainrot. Besides, and this is the biggest thing that stopped me realising this earlier, I dont feel that who I am now is wrong. I look in the mirror, and I see myself. But I've only recently kinda grasped the concept that being trans isn't all about dysphoria, having dysphoria is not always the way to tell. Although I dont think being a man is wrong, fucking hell, being a girl would be much better. And it feels so fucking weird actually typing that.

But what I'm saying is, atleast for the time being, I could manage to just not do anything. Which is for the better seeing as my parents would start screaming at me for saying anything remotely in the direction of being an ally. And I live on TERF Island. Transitioning would be an absolute pain in the ass, especially right now, so it kinda feels like why bother when the way I am doesnt really feel wrong. Transitioning could be quite dangerous and have big risks, it kinda just feels like I dont need that shit in my life, Im already running on fumes and a list of people I need to outlive. I usually hold a mindset of "if it ain't broke, don't fix it", but this usually applies to binary things, like if my team wins using the same strat a few times in a row in CS, "Do it again, ain't broke, don't fix", but this is not nearly as binary as that, this isn't a win/loss.

Something that is both comforting and a little concerning is that no matter what, there is atleast a 2 year hold on this. I should be able to go to uni after that and start living my own life, but as of right now, doing something like transitioning is NOT an option. Ive got a 2 year long planning phase and Ive kinda just been taking stock tbh. I don't think "that" period of my life hit too hard, Im still skinny (Yeah, ik skinny =/= feminine but its better than being buff imo) kinda fuckin tall, if my growth follows the same as my brother did which it is so far Im gonna be like 6'3 by the end of that 2 years (6'1 now) so thats probably gonna be more of a mild annoyance than a genuine problem. My voice varies ALOT, I can have a pretty damn low voice, and a bit of a higher pitch, it naturally varies, I normally find I talk in a higher pitch when I'm happier and lower when Im trying to appear more... normal? idk, theres probably somrthing to think about in that.

Honestly idk, theres no real end point to this, I just wanted to talk about this somewhere. As much as I never saw myself being in this position, I use r/196, play ULTRAKILL, and Study Computer Science and want to continue it as a career path, cmon, it was only ever a matter of time, this was inevitable.

#196 #personal logs

[foxfairy06]

ok this might be a long one but theres something specific i see most transmeds say that i dont understand

so. obviously a lot of transmeds are anti-nonbinary, so thanks for not being one of those types! however, i take issue with the idea that you can only be nonbinary if youre dysphoric

assuming "nonbinary" just as, like, an alternative to male/female (simplifying nb identity for the sake of argument), why would someone need to have body dysphoria? social dysphoria around names/titles/pronouns is one thing, but needing physical dysphoria seems inconsistent

like. say you have "Sean", an AFAB nonbinary person. Sean is dysphoric and wants a flat chest and the effects of testosterone.

and you also have "Charlie", an AMAB nonbinary person. Charlie has exactly the same sense of gender as Sean does, including how they want to look. As such, Charlie is non-dysphoric, as they already have a flat chest and a deep voice/beard/etc

if you need dysphoria to be nonbinary, why should Charlie be excluded from the label when their gender is the same as Sean's?

I'm aware that, for some, socisl dysphoria is enough to "count" as trans. But the majority of (allegedly) nonbinary inclusive transmeds claim that body dysphoria is required (and ive been here since 2012 - ive spoken to a LOT of transmeds)

to me, it feels like transmed ideology waters down nonbinary identity, even those of the nonbinary people they claim to accept, for the sake of trying to find a reason people are trans. paradoxically, it feels like they see nb people as man-lite/woman-lite, while still denying that someone can identify as nonbinary men or nonbinary women.

sorry its so long lol, this has just bothered me for a long time and im yet to get an internally consistent answer

The issue is because we believe there are binary bodies, and a male body is not nonbinary. In order to be dysphoric for a nonbinary body, using agender or nullsex as an example, you would want an androgynous voice, an AMAB enby might use estrogen, and AFAB enby might use testosterone. Yes, an AFAB might want top surgery, and an AMAB wouldn't, but they're both just as binary, because transition isn't limited to top dysphoria. Charlie, unless he experiences a strong dysphoria regarding his self social perception, which is based not on gender roles, but how you perceive others to perceive you in relation to your sex, would not be nonbinary, they would be cis. Nonbinary isn't an "alternative identity", it's just an existence that doesn't meet one of the poles of the binary based gender spectrum, which is based in a series of sexual traits.

I'd also like to point out that supporting enban isn't at all rare among transmedicalists, it just depends on the source. Most nonradical transmed consider excluding enben a radical belief. r/transmedical is an example of a radical space and r/truscum is not, for example.