#but idk like in the case of billy specifically like let me be clear i do not like billy and im not invested in his redemption

[grandwretch]

redemptive death is the laziest trope in western literature i think. redemption should take work. to have it undone with one act where they don’t even have to confront their own ills is a disservice. both the character and the other characters they’ve harmed deserve better. more zukos, less kylos. please. 

#stranger things has a huge problem with this #in the case of both billy and eddie btw #like i know theres some debate about whether or not eddie's death was even meant to be redemptive or if it was suicide #but idk like in the case of billy specifically like let me be clear i do not like billy and im not invested in his redemption #but if he was to be redeemed #i want to see him work for it and i want to see him admit what he did #and i want to see the other characters work through their own feelings about it #having them die for others and then the characters have to accept it is like #so manipulative of the audience? #like manipulation isn't the right word right #but like. okay they made the 'ultimate sacrifice' or whatever so you have to accept that as a cathartic apology #or you're an asshole #and it also puts the CHARACTERS in that position which is a whole other kettle of fish #like i genuinely think we should get more characters who are pissed their enemies died rather than apologise #because now they don't even get a choice whether to forgive them or not #anyway #killing characters can be fun but also sometimes people use it as a way to be lazy #[gestures to the entire action genre and all the dead wives]

[slightlytoastedghost]

The Fate of Eddie Munson

Alright, with the new trailer that dropped this week and the heavy “someone is going to die” vibes everything has been giving out so far, I’ve been thinking about what might happen to everybody's favorite D&D nerd, Eddie Munson and I have a few theories.

Disclaimer: I am pretty new to the fandom, so if I get something wrong that has been established a while ago, please let me know.

Theory #1: Heroic Sacrifice/Running Motif

In general, it seems like the Duffer Brothers seem to favor two types of deaths: Heroic Sacrifices (Eleven, Bob, Hopper, Billy) and “Death of the Innocent” (Barb, Bob, Alexi, Chrissy) and unfortunately I think Eddie has a good chance of hitting both of them. In the most literal sense, Eddie is innocent. He is being blamed for all of Vecna’s murders when he just happened to be in the wrong place, wrong time and like D&D and the color black.

Additionally, all through Part 1, Eddie has had a motif of running away. He expresses it first to the Hellfire Club as they face Vecna:

And again when he ran away from the basketball team

And lastly to Steve, where he seems to show guilt at doing so

Now ultimately, I would love if the Duffer Brothers stuck to their guns on the “there’s no shame in running away” idea (and pretty much all of these theories are tied to this motif anyway), but I think they might try to swing this as Eddie’s character growth.

So far in the newest trailer, we see Eddie a handful of times:

In a camper (?) with the rest of the Hawkins group

Fighting something with Dustin in his trailer

Grabbing his guitar

And fucking shredding on the roof of his trailer with Dustin (which holy fuck is so cool)

Now, I think that maybe Eddie and Dustin are in Eddie’s trailer to guard the gate (and probably keep Dustin out of the main action). My first guess on what all these scenes mean was that something will happen where the rest of the Hawkins group is going to need a distraction or something, so Eddie is going chose to “not run away any more” and play his guitar on the roof as a distraction and get himself killed because honestly that is a very metal send off for Eddie, just look at the shot, and provides a conclusion to the running motif. However since Dustin is there with him, maybe they’re trying to act as a tether for someone with the curse, but I still think it will draw too much attention to them since we know something happens in the trailer, as we also have this shot of Dustin, noticeably Eddie-less.

Maybe Eddie just gets taken and will survive and that’s what’s causing Dustin’s distress, but given everything else, I don’t know.

It also makes the clean up of the whole situation a lot cleaner. If Eddie dies in the Upside Down, then the cops can say he died/we shot him/we arrested him and sent him to an out of state jail and everyone can believe they’re safe. This would FUCKING SUCK because it means Eddie’s name is never cleared and he dies as the monster the town thinks he is. Unfortunately, I think this is the most likely of the three theories, but it’s also my least favorite because I really like Eddie and want him to survive (and also he may be a third confirmed queer character depending on how intentional the costume department was and it would really suck if that was the case and he died).

Theory #2: Re-Homing

Honestly, this one is a nice middle group theory, “half-way-happy” if you will. The main thing this hinges on is being able to pin the Vecna murders on someone else, specifically 001 since, you know, he is the one killing everyone. I think if they find someway to pin the original murders and the new ones on 001 because he is a legal person (unlike El and the rest of the kids in the testing facility) and could reasonably be still alive to commit the new murders as he was only a child at the time (now, pinning the original murders on a child miiiiight be tricky, but idk maybe they could go for the old “copycat of the father” thing). This way, Eddie would still be alive and his name would be totally clear.

However, even if this does happen, I don’t think Eddie would want to stick around the town that was so willing to hunt him down. I think he would want to leave Hawkins (running away again fitting in with the motif) maybe with the help of Dr. Owens. Even if Eddie’s name doesn’t get cleared, Dr. Owens could probably pull the same stunt he did for El where he claims jurisdiction over him and just actually lets him go.

In the end, Eddie is alive, but we probably wouldn’t see him again in the final season. Which sucks, but hey, at least he’s alive.

Theory #3: Good Ending-Eddie Gets to Graduate

This is honestly my pipe-dream theory. Somehow, Eddie lives and gets his name cleared (probably similarly to theory #2). He gets to return to Hawkins High School and gets a bit of a break in his classes because, you know, the town hunted him down for crimes he didn’t commit but instead had to watch happen twice. He passes his classes and in the end of season time jump, we see he has graduated. Honestly, I could possibly see him being like “hey I’m going to stay in Hawkins to help in case this thing comes back”, but with the whole town turning against him, I think even in this good end, he would still leave. Maybe he and his band go to California to try and make it big. Maybe he stays weed buddies with Argyle and Jonathan and we get to see him again in the last season (that is, if the Byers don’t move back to Hawkins, but maybe he could still be friends with Argyle and we get a little cameo of the two in the last season). In the end, Eddie is free, alive, and happy and walks away from all of this with only a little bit of trauma.

But until July, who knows what will happen to this wonderful metalhead and if the first theory ends up being true, there’s always fanfic.

#stranger things #stranger things spoilers #stranger things season 4 #stranger things theory #eddie munson #my posts #I didnt notice dustin on the roof the first time so that gives me hope maybe that scene isn't gunna be super death flaggy as i thought #god i hope he makes it through this

[yurtletheturtlehenderson]

COSMIC - S3:E3; Chapter Three, The Case of The Missing Lifeguard - [Pt. 1]

A Will Byers x Reader Series

𝘌𝘭 𝘨𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘭 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘫𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘉𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘥𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘏𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳. 𝘞𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘪𝘳𝘭𝘴 𝘵𝘳𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦𝘨𝘶𝘢𝘳𝘥, 𝘞𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘔𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘓𝘶𝘤𝘢𝘴 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘋&𝘋. 𝘋𝘶𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘚𝘵𝘦𝘷𝘦 𝘴𝘱𝘺 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘴, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘙𝘰𝘣𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘱𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘙𝘶𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘢𝘯 𝘮𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘢𝘨𝘦.

⚠️: more Billy/Mind Flayer shenanigans, more Y/n being Not Straight™️ and slight, whatever the huffy, whiney hell Hopper was during a majority of the season

📝: yall, idk how to describe hairstyles so I'm gonna clear it up now; the hairstyle Y/n is doing on El is the coil ponytail she wears at the end in That Scene™️ 🥲🚚👋📝🛣

Yes, I regret the whole "sisters" failsafe I put in specifically to stop myself. But as it turns out, no I cannot suppress the gay. So innocent, mutual pining ahead! 🥳🎉🌈

||𝟑𝐑𝐃 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍 𝐏𝐎𝐕||

A pair of sock-covered feet bounce happily on the carpeted floor as Madonna's Angel blasts through the radio on the dresser. Max jumps back and forth on El's bedroom carpet, singing into the hairbrush she had found on the nightstand. Beside her, sitting on the bed is the girl herself, sporting her new colorful look; engrossed in a selection of teen magazines that are splayed out before her.

"You must be an angel,"

El bobs her head along with the tune, careful of Y/n's hand weaving through her hair from where she's kneeled behind her on the bed. She grins up at Max before going back to her work, her lips moving as she silently sings along.

"I can see it in your eyes,"

Y/n finishes the last coil behind El's left ear, and pulls it together with the other, merging her hair into a ponytail at the nape of her neck. After she tightens the bright blue scrunchie one last time, she mutters a defeated, "Alright. I tried," before she maneuvers around El across the mattress and allows herself to fall back on the right side of the bed, her head propped up on the rows of pillows. She grabs a magazine, boredly sifting through it while El delicately feels around the back of her head with a smile, admiring Y/n's work.

"Full of wonder and surprise,"

El's attention quickly returns to the magazine in her hands when she flips the page. She has to turn it sideways to see the whole thing. A young man, who El guessed to be just a little older than Steve, was smiling back at her.

Max's singing and dancing come to a slow when she notices El lingering on the page. With a chuckle, she discards the hairbrush from where she found it and kneels beside the bed.

"Oh, you found Ralph Macchio," Max simpers.

"Macchio?" El asks with a smile.

"Yeah," Max nods. "he's the Karate Kid,"

Both and El and Y/n jump when Max suddenly cuts the air in a mock karate chop and yells, "Hai-yah!"

They giggle and Y/n just rolls her eyes playfully. Particularly, at what comes next.

"He's so hot, right?" Max asks.

An amused grin glues itself to Y/n's face as her eyes peek out over the top of magazines to catch El's reaction. Y/n's smile spreads, buried under the pages when she sees El's face lit up in a blush.

"I bet he's an amazing kisser, too," Max says, drawing out a funny look in El's eyes. "Hey, uh,"

Y/n finds her eyes drawn to Max when she feels the old mattress dip a little under her weight. She notices a funny, almost intrigued look on her face.

"is Mike a good kisser?" She asks.

Y/n lets out an involuntarily "Blech!" At the question, discarding her magazine back to the pile with her nose scrunched up in disgust despite the smile still on her lips.

El laughs at Y/n, lightly shoving her knees that sat propped up above her as she shoots her a smile. "Not 'blech',"

Y/n has to readjust her head on the pillows to gawk up at El properly, a funny look hidden in her eyes.

"Wait, so is he like, actually," Y/n makes another face, failing to get through the sentence with a straight face. She laughs a little, putting a mocking tone in her voice. "'good' at kissing?"

El doesn't answer right away, much too confused with the direction this conversation had gone. She blushes again, giving her awaiting friends a bashful shrug.

"I don't know. He's my first boyfriend,"

Max is quick to correct her, but she does so gently. "Ex-boyfriend,"

El's face falls.

But Max is also quick to console her. She lands a gentle hand on El's shoulder, her voice going soft.

"Hey, don't worry about it. Okay?" El still doesn't seem too sure. "He'll come crawling back to you in no time, begging for forgiveness."

Y/n subconsciously fiddles with the ring pop still on her finger, a thin sheet of plastic still covering the candy diamond.

"I guarantee you, him and Lucas are, like, totally wallowing in self-pity and misery right now," Max's face scrunches up as she mocks the aforementioned exes. "They're like, 'Oh, I hope they take us back!'"

Y/n laughs, her left hand lightly smacking Max's arm, grabbing her attention.

"Yeah, but, Mike's probably more like," Max fights a sudden laugh when she catches the knowing look in Y/n's eyes. "'I hope they take us back! They have to—'"

Neither Max nor Y/n can fight the grin breaking out on both their faces as they finish in perfect sync.

-"take us back! Nyeh-nyeh-NYEH!"

Once again delightfully confused, El's stare travels between her newest best friend and her oldest; a warm feeling burrowing deep in her chest and gut, her stomach aflutter as she laughs with them.

"God, what I wouldn't give to see the look on their stupid faces," Max says, shaking her head wistfully.

El goes quiet, something neither of her friends miss.

"What is it?" Max asks.

That seems to snap everything into place, and Y/n props herself up on her hands. There's enough mischief in her eyes to match El's, and she quirks a brow.

"Wait. Are you serious?"

El only smirks, shrugging her shoulders.

"Will someone please tell me what's going on?" Max asks, only to find herself under two impish stares.

⊹ ⊹ ⊹

El sits cross-legged against her dresser, the radio switched to static sitting just above her head. In her hands is the multi-colored headband Y/n had gifted to her over the holidays when her hair started to fall in her face. They both knew it could also double as a comfortable, makeshift blindfold in case she ever found herself traveling to the void again.

As she prepared to do now.

She hooks the headband over her head, pulling it down over her eyes as Y/n and Max took a seat.

"Is this really gonna work?" Max asks excitedly from where she's perched on the edge of the bed.

El nods, and Max's face lights up in awe.

"Holy shit, this is insane-!"

"Max."

"Right, quiet. I'm sorry,"

Y/n chuckles up at her noiselessly, completely understanding the excitement of it all. Particularly, since she had never once witnessed El demonstrating these powers unless it had been necessary.

Then came the waiting part.

Y/n had forgotten about the waiting.

It was all they could do. Wait as they watch El draw in a deep breath, allowing her mind to reach out to the person it had most.

She feels the imaginary water at her feet first, as she always did. It didn't take her as long as it used to to fine-tune the distorted voices cutting in and out, much like what she found her radio to do sometimes. But she did it soon enough.

She's back in the void, for the first time in a long while.

Part of her was worried it would be harder without as much practice as she got last year, but it wasn't.

The image that lay ahead of her was clear, the voices even clearer.

"What did I do wrong? What could I have done wrong?"

Mike.

He was laying on the couch. The one from his basement. El recognized it immediately.

And he wasn't alone, that much she  had suspected.

"Do I have to go through this again?" Lucas asks, sounding tired.

He was pacing around the couch, rubbing his face. Will was with them, he was hovering over the small table she had sat at only years ago.

"I see them," El says.

Max lowers herself to the carpet, sitting next to Y/n who leans in curiously.

"What are they doing?" Y/n asks.

"Eating."

The crunch of Dorito chips Mike had shoved into his mouth was loud enough to echo out across the entire void. He continues through an obnoxious mouthful.

"I just don't understand what I did to deserve this,"

El has neared them now, and she turns her head curiously to Will when he scoffed. He looked frustrated, and he sounded it too. But El could tell he was trying to fight it for the sake of his friends' feelings.

"Look, it sucks that that happened," he says. "But why don't you guys try and take your mind off of it for-"

"For the last time, Will. No! Not now," Lucas says, turning away just in time to miss the boy's shoulders slump. He back to Mike, releasing a heavy sigh. "You didn't do anything, Mike. That's my whole point. You're the victim here."

El's eyes fall back to Mike, not all sure about what she was feeling.

"I know," he cries out. "It's just, why is she treating me this way?"

"Mike-"

"I don't know." Frustrated, he shakes his head. "What did I do wrong? What did I do wrong?!"

"Mike, stop it!" Will has to yell to be heard, but his friends eventually turn their attention his way. "you know what you did wrong!"

They watch him carefully, as does El.

Just grateful to have their attention, he softens just a notch "You messed up, alright? But there's just not much you can do right now,"

"He's right," Lucas sighs, bending over to move Mike's feet out of to make room before taking a seat. "I mean, we told the truth and everything,"

Will let out a bitter laugh. "No, you didn't! You got caught! You told them you were shopping for them, but that's it. You still kept lying about your Nana,"

Max and Y/n watch El carefully, the only indication something had happened came from her angered sigh.

"They lied about Nana," she says finally.

"Oh, I knew it," Max hissed.

Y/n merely placed her forehead in her hands tiredly as she waited for more information.

"But we still tried! That's gotta count for something," Mike cries, stuffing more food into his mouth. "I mean, shouldn't that count for something?"

"Mike, relax. Just... relax," Lucas sighs into his hands yet again, clearly exasperated. "And stop asking rational questions."

"I know, I know. You're right," Mike sighs. His expression quickly turned bitter as he sent his friends a sour look. "Because women act on emotion and not logic,"

"Precisely," Lucas nods. "It's a totally different species."

El's breathing grows deeper and for a moment the pair of friends fear the worst. But the truth was, while El didn't quite exactly know what they were saying, she knew it was foul.

"They say we are 'species'."

-"What?"

-"Come again?"

"'Emotion, not logic."

-"What?"

-"Come again?"

Will shifted on his feet, looking unsure as to what to say, or if he should at all.

"Will is upset,"

Y/n scoffs, looking between Max and El. "He should be if they're saying that shit." She fires, worry briefly taking over her anger over the doubtful thought seeded in her mind. Quickly she leaned forward.

"Wait, he wasn't saying that was he?"

Relief sweep over her when El shakes her head.

She finds her eyes on him again, looking as if he was trying too hard to fit in and not say the wrong thing. El hadn't known him for terribly long, but she knew enough to realize this shouldn't be normal.

"Guys," he says, his eyes darting to the small table he had been setting up. "Come on, it's ready. You already said you'd play a month ago when Dustin got back. I've been planning ever since! And I really think it'll help take your mind off of all this."

Lucas groans.

"Will! We already told you. Not right now," he shakes his head as if scolding a small child.

"They are upset with him."

"Why?" Y/n pressed, sharing an equally concerned look with Max.

"They broke up with you, what else is there to talk about?"

"Easy for you to say, you still have a girlfriend!" Mike throws back.

"'Easy for Will to say,'" El repeats.

Y/n could only imagine what they were putting Will through right now. Or just what her words could mean. Her guilt from having to cancel weighed heavier and heavier.

"He says..."

They all watch, El included, as all his frustrations boil over.

"Well, none of that matters now, does it?!"

Shocked at his outburst, Lucas and Mike break into matching, sour grins nevertheless.

"Then join us, Will," Mike says, sharing a smirk with Lucas. "Join us in trying to figure the greatest mystery of all; the female species!"

"What? What's he saying?" Y/n asked.

But she receives no answer. El had fallen quiet.

El cocks her head, her glare thrown to each boy like daggers, feeling an anger of her own. As well as a protectiveness.

That didn't last long, however. Not moments after, Mike seemed to be challenging his own foul behavior. His mouth opened up wide, letting loose a deep and billowing belch.

"Dude," Mike laughed lazily, gesturing around him as he grinned up at his friends. "You can smell the nacho cheese,"

El recoiled, her upper lip hooking in a grimace both in and out of the void.

She's relieved to see even one of them disgusted by his antics — Will, but it doesn't change her annoyance. But it was better, and far less confusing than Lucas who broke out in a sly grin.

"I get that beat,"

"What?" Mike mumbles in between picking his teeth with his tongue.

Baffled, El looks to Will again whose face pales. He quickly shakes his head, his words pleading.

"Oh, no."

"No, Lucas," Mike says, jumping in. "No!"

El watches curiously as Lucas's grin stretches wider — "No, Lucas!" — and he lifts his right leg — "Lucas! LUCAS!" — and...

El stumbles back in shock when the sound hits suddenly. It echoed louder than the burp had — far louder — and only grows louder as Lucas lifts his leg higher.

El rips the headband off her head to reveal her widened eyes, her shoulders moving and falling in a panicked-like state.

Never blinking, her mouth still wrenched open in shock, she turns to gape at her friends.

"What happened?"

She didn't answer.

"Are you okay?" Y/n pressed, fearing the worst.

She breaks out in a grin, a fit of sudden giggles sent her slouching into the carpet and her head landing in Y/n's lap. Max and Y/n welcomed her reaction with open arms, her infectious laughter spreading to them despite the utter bewilderment they were feeling. Y/n looked down at her friend, trying not to laugh.

El managed to peel her eyes open long enough to see Y/n's crooked smile poking into her view of the ceiling and she loses it all over again.

"What?" She laughs.

"What happened?"

El clutched her aching sides. Every time she tried to speak, the silliness of it all stole her words all over again.

It had been completely revolting and

angering. But it was also the most fun she'd ever had in that horrible place. This also being why it was so hard to wipe the smile from her face.

⊹ ⊹ ⊹

Will stumbled back as far away as possible from the massive stink cloud he was sure would drown him. Mike had stumbled off the couch, waving at the air as Will buried his nose in his shirt.

"Oh, man," Mike groans. "what the hell, Lucas?"

"Come on, that was impressive,"

"So was Will," Mike shoots him a knowing smirk. "Finally realizing the frustrations of the female species,"

"That wasn't what I said," he shakes his head, growing angrier by the second. "I said it doesn't matter if I have a girlfriend or not right now cause I can't see her! Both of us have to clean up your messes and it's the same reason why we missed our six month anniversary last month,"

Both Mike and Lucas wince. "Congrats?"

Will sighs, throwing himself in his seat at the D&D table.

⊹ ⊹ ⊹

The cabin's front door was nearly thrown off its hinges as an inebriated Hopper stumbled across the threshold. The door slammed shut behind him, shaking the room as he huffed and puffed. Several times he nearly lost his balance just standing still, but despite the blurred vision and numbed senses he could still make out the muffled radio from his daughter's room.

That wasn't good. At least, that's all Hopper could comprehend right away before he pieced together why; that always meant Mike was here.

And the door was shut.

"Hey!" No response. "Hey!"

The ache of rejection and embarrassment he had been feeling all night had been drowned in bottles of wine from Enzo's, numbing a great deal when Joyce had failed to show. But it couldn't quite extinguish his anger, and that was all that was left now. And he had no problem channeling that into this moment.

In his drunken state, he manages to march across the living room without stumbling into anything and his voice rises behind his gritted teeth.

"When I say three inches, three-"

A small yelp and a short burst of hot hair stinging his sweating skin and knocking over the lamp on the desk was the first thing he registered after the boom of the door being busted open. Before him, was the sight of El and her friends lounging across her floor, flipping through magazines and gawking up at him.

He realized then what had happened judging by Y/n drawing in a deep breath, and dropping her head into her hands. She had clearly been especially startled being so close to the door and had inadvertently created a mini shockwave that swept across every loose item in the room. He could hear her cursing into her hands as Max glared up at him.

"Do you knock?! Jeez!"

"Yeah!" El repeated. "Jeez!"

At that moment, Hopper couldn't remember a time he had back-pedaled so quickly. He could hear his slurred words stringing together a nervous apology.

"Wo-wo-oh, hey," he gulps. "I'm sorry."

The three girls continue to gawk up at him from the floor.

"I thought that, uh-,"

"If you were expecting Mike, he isn't here," Y/n said.

"We wanted to have a sleepover," El says, still beyond excited at the thought of having one since Y/n told her about them almost a year ago. "Is that...okay?"

"Yeah,"

The word fell out of Hopper's mouth before he could will it, his entire demeanor melting away in relief.

"Yeah. Yeah. Yeah," he said, his voice going higher than normal as he stumbled through the tension. "Your parents know you guys are here?"

"Yup," Max says, and Y/n nods.

Blazing through the past few moments, or at least attempting to, Hopper waves his arm dismissively and his slurring intensifies.

"Uh, yeah, it's cool. Yeah. That's-That's really cool."

This was great! His "heart-to-heart" had worked. At least the way he did it. He couldn't count on his hands the number of times he had asked El about the others; silently hoping she'd take the hint and get him out of long, awkward discussion. But she never had, she only went on about Mike, and the more the summer stretched on the less he heard about Y/n or—

"Did you need something?" Max asks, snapping him out of his thoughts.

He hadn't realized he had been just standing there, swaying slightly and zoning out.

He was overstepping. He could see that now. And not just because of the embarrassment written all over his daughter's face.

"No, no," he says quickly, shaking his head and making a lazy grab for the doorknob. "Uh, I'll leave. I'll just let you... I'll leave you..."

His voice trails off before being swallowed completely when the door shuts with a click. For a moment, Hopper just stands there processing it all.

A smirk hooked his lips.

No Mike.

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Pride Month Resources and Links

168 Ways to Donate in Support of Black Lives & Communities of Color

Save The Tears: White Woman's Guide

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@dickkwad @iblesstherainsdown-in-africa @miscellaneoustoasts @happyandlonely-blog @peeperparkour @ba-responds ​ @bibliophilesquared @blogforhoes @witch-of-all-things-soft @shawkneecaps @whothefuckstolemykeds @daughter-of-the-stars11 ​ @stranger-things4 @kpopanimegirl ​ @nightbu-g @lozzybowe @gizmofishersupremacy @spiderbitch69420

❥ Let me know if you would like to be added to or removed from the taglist! ❥

#cosmic #cosmic 3 #will byers x reader #will byers x fem!reader #stranger things #stranger things 3 #the case of the missing lifeguard #3x03 #st 3x03

[bluemoonpunch]

HI! This is from a pretty old post but I was wondering, what did you mean when you said you used to "enter a trance state in three or four different sets"? Did you just repeat a certain technique over and over until you went under or did you mean something else?

A: Yeah, pretty much. It's sort of like dropping deeper and deeper into your unconscious mind layer by layer, similar to what they do in Inception, I think. Similar concept. Every layer would be something different like I would do something different in order to go down further as I was in a different state of mind or holding a different level of consciousness.

XXXX

Q: Hey! I was re-reading the external alignment of min yoongi that you posted (because weirdly his readings which are very old now, give me comfort :| ) and read that incarnation cycle part and your mentioning 200-year cycle. Just realized that the great Jupiter Saturn mutation cycle is also 200 years long so maybe it's some dots that connect? Idk I almost had an epiphany moment and then felt dumb, sorry.

A: It is an interesting lineup for sure. I wouldn't be surprised if there is some connection there. Here's an article about it if anyone is interesting: link.

XXXX

Q: me : vibin to the end credit music of bmp's videos

namjoon : sings

me: 👀

Bmp: slips in some numericals ( ͡°³ ͡°)

Me: 👁👄👁

seriously nam-vocals and them codes hit diff -@bursaat

A: This is a very old ask that I've had saved in my ask box for a while just because it always made me smile, lol.

XXXX

Q: heyy just wanted to add a little info, Billie apparently shared her birth time back in the days on Twitter when she was talking about astrology and charts with her fans and it's 11.30 am. If you want you can look up to that too :) thanks for your work for the collective 🙏 -@bursaat

A: Thanks for letting me know. There's definitely some aspects in her chart that line up with her EA reading, a lot of interesting tension between planets that seems to be set up for public progression, kind of leading people through certain phases of life by publically displaying her own progression. It's very interesting for sure.

XXXX

Q: what happens when two souls merge?

A: If souls merge while still occupying physical forms, as in they are still existing physically as two separate humans, there can be a lot of psychological issues between the two or a severe imbalance where one has more trouble than the other, which can lead to a very noticeable power imbalance, especially in romantic partnerships. This is also something that can happen with twins who either share a split soul or just have a close enough connection or are dependent enough on each other that their souls merge.

I have seen before in some of my personal work and exploration that in some pretty severe cases one person will "vibrate out of the body" in order to merge with the other. In other words, the one who is "weaker" mentally or physically will die in order to merge with the other. On a higher level, the souls or the consciousnesses may remain separate, but they'll merge on lower levels. Such as merging on a 5D plane but remaining separate on 9D plane.

XXXX

Q: Hi! This is not a reading request, but could you please add dates to the mini-readings on your website from now on? There's no date for them anywhere and I know I can find them here and see where they were done, but if it's not too hard please add them in the future! Thanks!!! <3

A: Yes, all of the mini-readings on the BMP website should now show the dates they were posted on the top center, just below the main title of the post. Just be aware that some of the posts put up in late 2018 were carried over from Tumblr, so there will be two dates, one under the title for when it was posted onto the website, and another date at the top of the entry marking when it was originally posted on Tumblr.

XXXX

Q: Hey! Hope you are well. I have a general question about shifting timelines: How do we identify if we've shifted to a different timeline in a tangible sense? Is it based on how our interests change, how clear/hazy our memories become of fairly recent years, etc? I've been getting back to regular meditation again and I'm trying to figure out if what I'm going through is because of work+isolation+lockdowns messing up my perception or if it is something else.

A: Well, I assume it can be different for everyone, but for me, it's definitely a matter of memory and energetic ties to those memories that state out the most. Specifically around trauma and very heavy memories that used to really deeply trigger me even with the slightest mention of it now feel almost like something that I've only just heard about rather than experienced. Like, I still remember things very clearly, but they just don't feel heavy anymore, they don't come with negative feelings the way they used to, it's just kind of... there. Almost like a dream.

I've definitely experienced certain shifts before where, deadass, one day I was absolutely terrified of a specific concept, specifically involving aspects of communication with higher consciousness or beings of other dimensions and whatnot, and then suddenly the next day it was absolutely not a problem at all. It was really strange, but it was literally like flipping a switch. I've had a few moments like that in the past 4 years or so where "flipping a switch" could most accurately describe certain points of shifting timelines or shifting in levels of conscious awareness simply because of how fast it happened.

Shifting timelines can also come with remembering past lives, or being able to recall experiences you yourself didn't have, which can be really confusing and anxiety-inducing at times, but as long as you are conscious of it and you know what's going on, it's easy to ground yourself and settle into the present moment and just focus on the here and now.

Sudden inspiration or interests popping up out of nowhere along with very strong intuitive pulls toward new things can be a sign of shifting timelines but also signs of spiritual or conscious expansion and development within a singular timeline as well.

#bmpasks

[wendibird]

SPN 15X17 Observations

Well, watching this week went pretty smoothly (and I was actually able to get my little bluetooth keyboard thing to talk to my tablet so I was able to watch on my big TV screen and type up notes fairly easily. :) 

And just to clarify, sometimes my notes as I took them were VERY brief, and in some cases I’ve gone back and added in a few details or explanations to make clear what I meant by what at the time. 

I’ve also come to the conclusion that I don’t always remember to take notes, especially if Important Things are happening. (Do people even like the notes section? Or would you just prefer reading my odd takes on everything after the fact?) 

Anyway, here’s what I have for 15X17 “Unity”. Well, I do have more thoughts drifting around, but I’m always concerned that I’m going on too long as it is. *LOL*  (Under the cut for length and spoiler aversion)

Okay, going in I’ve heard rumors that this is a “Sam Heavy” episode, so we’ll see. *fingers crossed* 

- wow, is Chuck starting in on this world already?

- Silent treatment.

- I wonder if she’s guessed.

- fuck you Dean!

(but I’m not surprised. it just confirms what I’d already suspected about how Dean really feels about Jack.)

Commercial Thoughts:

Yeah, so, I’m firmly in Sam and Cas’ camp here. Jack may not be family to Dean, but he is to them. He’s their Son. 

I also think that though he hasn’t talked about it, Sam regrets his part in the Drama Coffin plan involving Jack last season. Think it’s one of those cases where he realized too late he was on the wrong side, and he doesn’t want to be there again.

As for Dean… I get that he wants to see the people he cares most about make it out of this. (Sam and Cas.) And I get he’s doing the tunnel vision thing. I think he knows that Sam’s right but he won’t let himself admit it.

- Wow….. The fanangels are kinda creepy.

- They’ve lost all their nuance with Chuck. Or my theory is right and Chuck has actually shifted darkside.

- Oh wow…. Amara is really going to bat here.

Commercial Thoughts:

Still not sure how much she’s (Amara) really guessed. She’s acting as though the whole “trapping him” idea is still a go, but what she’d said to Dean, as pointedly as she did, it seemed like maybe she suspected what was really going on and was still trying to give him the option to go a different way.

And even if this is Chuck having shifted dark, it could still be written with more nuance than this crappy villain schtick.

I mean, even in S11 when he’s all but given up on humanity and existence and was going to let Amara win, it was written with there being a depth to him about it.

- Don’t know if Dean’s trying to convince himself that he doesn’t care as deeply to make this easier or what.

- HOw is ADAM still alive?! And she’s an angel?

- Interesting behavior for an angel. *LOL*

- “Then he moved on to our sons.” Hints of Cain and Abel?

- Okay, so the angel kept him alive. (Sure, I can buy that.) 

- Pretty Crystals!

- He’s (Dean) heard those lines before. And Dean’s feeling uneasy about it.

- Amethyst! (Sorry, always had a thing for Amethyst and it’s my birthstone)

- (oh, okay, all of them)

- Ewww….. Open heart surgery

- Rib!

- Dean doesn’t like being rail-roaded.

- Talk time.

- I don’t like this…… (Jack using the rib and starting the suicide-bomb process.) 

Commercial Thoughts:

Okay, so, what Dean said, I’m glad he said it. And I have been getting hints of that feeling from him the whole season, about feeling disconnected because of what they found out about Chuck and their lives. I just… I still think he’s willfully blinding himself to what’s really going on. That even this version of ��Free Will” is a script that he’s following. (Well, I think he’s starting to have misgivings about that.)

- Uh-oh! Ideas! 

- I love two researching nerds!

- Were we supposed to understand the Latin? *LOL* I caught “Mortem” in there a few times.

- Yey door!

- “your internal compass is functioning perfectly”

- I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!!!

- Who dat?

- Dead someone or other

- W section.

- Reapers maybe?

- Who’s thinning the ranks?

- Empty!Meg!

- Sam is good! (At bluffing the hell out of an ancient cosmic being.) 

- IT’S A LITTLE LATE TO STOP IT!!!!

Commercial Thoughts:

*FREAKING OUT!!!*

Jack already started it! OG!Adam said that once started the reaction couldn’t be stopped.

Okay, deeper thoughts. Everyone’s playing chess. Still. The game is just bigger.

OG!Adam wants God dead because of stuff that happened. And Billy is following his plan? (Did I get that right?) The plan will make Billy the next God. (Not surprised there honestly.) Her world will be a lot more “orderly” no doubt.

The Empty just wants to sleep. (Honestly, can relate.) 

But everyone’s just using them all as gamepieces again. Dean’s getting that feel from things OG!Adam and Whatserfaceangel said. Sam knows now too. They’re still stuck in someone else’s story. They’re still not gaining true “Free Will”. I’m hoping that the route they take will actually get them off this train track.

- DUDE - WHAT (was in reference to Dean pulling a gun on Sam)

- Go Sam! He’s not letting this one go. (Referring to my feelings on Sam feeling bad about Jack and the Drama Coffin thing from way before, and him NOT settling for Dean’s plan this time, him sticking to his guns and saying what he feels and taking action.) 

- Chuck played her (Amara) too.

- Not again! (Oh Jack, will this forever be your fate?)

- FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!

Holy shit! That episode!

Okay, it actually did a good job of wrapping up a lot of ideas. Like, big-picture ideas that have been themes throughout the run of the show. 

Also, apparently this was the only world where Cas and the Winchesters broke the mold? Didn’t play by their roles?

Also, minor point but it made me happy: Chuck pointed out how it’s Sam who needed to find things out. Sam who kept digging. I made mention of it last episode how Billy kept going to Dean, because he was easier for her to manipulate. But Sam asks more questions. I think part of it is what Cas said about his internal compass. I think another part is his experiences. He’s been the brunt of the cosmic plot-lines a LOT of the time. So he does keep asking questions because of all the times he hadn’t and things went badly. (Like end of S4 with killing Lilith.) 

And let me be clear, it’s not that I think Dean is dumb. He isn’t. And he and Sam both make decisions a lot based on their feelings. (Sometimes it’s all you have to go on.) But he’s shown a tendency in the past several years especially to be more likely to make them based on anger. And he doesn’t get called on it often. And I don’t know if this is TOO meta (is that even a thing with this show anymore? *LMAO*) but I feel like part of that is written into the script. Of their world. Even when Dean’s wrong he’s often proven “right” by the narrative. He very rarely is made to face up to his mistakes. (Not saying he never is. But it definitely doesn’t seem to happen as often.) And I’m wondering, is that because up till now, he was Chuck’s favorite? We saw that Chuck can manipulate a LOT of things. And events, and even some people. 

How often have we noticed and commented on how the Narrative backs Dean up so much of the time, even when he might be in the wrong? Or even just questionable? Or morally grey? How much of that is possibly now supposed to be due to Chuck’s meddling? Because I’ve also seen it mentioned (and have also noticed) that although Sam winds up the “wrong one” a lot via the narrative, he’s actually HAD to learn and grow because of that. But because Dean is rarely shown as wrong, he hasn’t had to, and his character has stagnated a lot in the last several seasons. Of course, in reality, that’s due to the writing/show-running/powers-that-be making those decisions, but in-show could it possibly be something to do with Chuck? Maybe at first because he liked Dean more? But as time grew on, and he kept trying to set up his Cain and Abel plot with them, maybe it was to reinforce Dean’s self-image that he’s Right? 

And also by contrast, we had the end of last season where so many of Sam’s decisions which had been made with best intentions and best information/resources at the time wound up blowing-up in his face. As if to say "Ha-HAH! That's what you get for thinking you could lead people! That's what you get for thinking you could save Jack! That's what you get for thinking someone like Nick could be redeemed! That's what you get for talking your brother out of the Drama-Coffin plan!" It felt like it was specifically intended to make him severely doubt his own judgement. And it worked. After all that shit went down, one thing after another, culminating with their mother's death, he didn't trust himself. He didn't believe in himself. So he put all his trust in Dean. And Dean was full of RAGE. (I don't blame him. His Mom has been a keystone of his life, even when she wasn't there.) But Sam didn't give the objections he normally would have to Dean's plan to box-up Jack. Even though it was CLEAR how much he didn't like it. How wrong it felt to him.

Basically, what I’m trying to say is, I think Chuck has been nudging and manipulating a LOT of things in order to get the Winchesters to behave how he wants them to. 

IDK. My head is hurting from some of these meta thoughts. *LOL*

SO! Back to what happened in the actual episode.

I thought the format was interesting, focusing in on the different POV characters for their spans of the story until it all came together. (Wondering if this is going to continue into the next episode…) 

I liked that we got a lot of reveals about what is (possibly) really going on, in regards to the grand schemas. Because there are several at play here. But now we're at least getting glimpses of them. 

Even though we didn't see Billy, I thought the reveal about her plans were interesting, but definitely fit with her character as established so far. I know a lot of people are saying she's gotten drunk with her power or she's "turning evil" but I don't think that's the case. It's true that she hasn't told them everything about her plans, but that's because she's also using them as pieces in her game. But her goal is the same as it's always been since we first met her. She has ALWAYS been about the Natural Order. She never liked how the Winchesters (or anyone else) flaunted death again and again. So once she's in charge? Everyone and everything goes where they belong. The demons stay in hell, the angels stay in heaven, souls go where they're meant to, people from other universes go back (even if there's no universe to go back TO. Tough shit, they'd be dead anyway according to her) and those who have already died and been resurrected? They go back to wherever they should be. (At least, I THINK that was the implication made, with Sam asking Dean if he'd be willing to trade HIM to take-out Chuck. Sam was definitely realizing a LOT when Empty!Meg told him what Billy's plan was.) 

This isn't her turning Evil like has been done with Chuck. It's more, her becoming a more extreme version of what she already was. When she got her promotion, she found out a LOT more things. Including this option of events for taking Chuck out and putting things back to how they belong. And it even started with Dean's aborted Drama Coffin plan. Which eventually fails, because Sam, but it then leads to Jack sacrificing his soul to take out AU Michael, which eventually leads to Mary's Death and Chuck's opportunity to manipulate things more and so on and so forth until we wind up here. 

(Also, just wanna say, absolutely LOVED Rachel as the Empty again!) 

And also, having just watched that scene again, can I just say again how awesome Sam is? He straight-up told the Empty that even if he WAS lying, their best bet is to let him go with the book. And it couldn't really argue with that because he was right! (Well, if it had killed him then and there, Dean probably wouldn't have known right away and probably would have been able to carry out the plan. So there is that. Buuuuut none of them knew that either at the time.) 

And in general, I love how Sam just would NOT give up. This is the Sam Winchester I've come to love. He could feel in his bones that this plan was wrong so he was doing everything he could to not only stop it, but to find some other way to get what they truly wanted. 

I also loved his and Cas' interactions. They were supportive of each other and both were trying to find a way to save their son. (Dean has officially forfeited his Dad-Card in my book. Hell, in his book too.) Also, I remember hearing someone from production, or who was maybe on set or something mentioning something about the Holy Grail in this episode? Well, in that scene where Sam and Cas are looking through those old crates and trunks and boxes, when Cas finds the key Sam is holding this really old looking chalice. Wonder if that's supposed to be what that is. *LOL* I mean, the Spear of Destiny (or at least, the head of the spear) was there in the Bunker, so why not I guess? *LOL*

We didn't get a lot of Sam and Jack interaction, but I liked what little we had. Sam made it clear to Jack that he wants to save him. (I'm really hoping we get SOMETHING more of them in the next episode or two but... yeah. Not a lot of time left.) 

I could go on for some length about my feelings on Dean and how he's been this season. But I don't want this to turn into a fully anti-Dean rant. I will say though that I'd definitely gotten the impression before this that Dean has different categories of people he cares about, and in his mind, he also has them ranked according to how expendable they are. And I'm not just talking about Jack here, though he is a major part of it. But at the end of the episode when he and Sam are having it out, Dean says he's basically willing to sacrifice EVERYONE to get what he wants. 

(I don't think he's actually willing to sacrifice Sam for it though. And yes, I know, he was waving a gun in Sam's face. But I don't believe for a moment he had any intention of killing his brother. Not when Sam asking point blanc if Dean is willing to trade him for killing Chuck, and that seems to be what causes Dean to start listening to what Sam's saying. Also, in the past, Dean hasn't been above threatening people to get what he wants. Like with Kaia. Also in S8's "Trail and Error" when he and Sam were talking about taking out the hellhound, Dean pretty much said if Sam even tries to get close to it, Dean would shoot him in the leg. Now, we never got to see if he actually would have or not, but regardless, it was a case of Dean being willing to hurt Sam a little in order to protect him from something he saw as a bigger threat. In that case it had been taking on the trials. In this case, it would have been to win their shot at freedom. At least in Dean's mind. Not saying I approve! Just, I think that's where his mindset was.) 

And this is a far cry from the Dean who, just a few years ago was willing to be a kamikaze bomb in order to save the world. And yes, Dean has mentioned "Saving the world" this season too. And I'm sure he means that too. But when he was at his most emotional, what he was talking about wasn't saving the world and everyone in it. It was freeing him and Sam from being Chuck's entertainment. And he's willing to sacrifice nearly anyone to accomplish that. At least, he was up til now. I hope that they're going to give him a change of heart before the end because I really REALLY would like the show to end with me not despising Dean and what he's become. Yes, I'm a Sam-girl, but I do care about Dean too. 

Also, I feel bad for Amara and what wound up happening with her. Like many other characters, she fell victim to Chuck's manipulations, and now I'm guessing he's even stronger than before. But also, Chuck wasn't the only one manipulating her. And maybe if they, (Dean especially, since she had a soft-spot for him) had actually been trying to find another way earlier, she wouldn't have fallen to despair when finding out the truth. 

Aaaaaanyway, I think I've rambled enough about this episode as it is. Thank you to whoever actually bothers to read all of this. *LOL*

#spn 15x17 spoilers #spn season 15 spoilers #episode review #my thoughts #tangents: i tend to live in them #sam winchester #dean winchester #castiel #jack kline #the darkness/amara #god/chuck #i think your internal compass is functioning perfectly #sam is jack's dad #castiel is jack's dad

[qqueenofhades]

Oh dear 😅 Okay so basically part one was me saying how someone was complaining that Maria's whole character was how perfect she was and how they were upset that we didn't get to know her better, and I said that's kind of the entire point? Especially because Frank even said to David that he only remembers good things, and then part three was me saying that while this is yes the trope of women being used for male development, because it's Frank, the application of this trope is a good one

(part 2) his memories are always of her loving him. we don’t get to know who Maria truly is because we were robbed of that, just like he was. We only see her as how Frank remembers her, and of COURSE she’s gonna be perfect and loving because that’s what frank is choosing to remember (and like what a beautiful thing to be remembered as??)

(part 4) and of course he is going to imagine her as beautiful and perfect and he’s going to keep that memory untouched by his reality because he sees who he has become. I am not going into detail about his children, but I of course recognize that they were also taken from him too, but someone was specifically complaining about Maria’s character and i felt like they missed the whole point? Idk what are your thoughts on this/might you be able to put what i’m trying to say into better words 😂

Well, as noted, I only got two parts of this ask (glares at Tumblr) and despite your many and valiant efforts, parts 1 and 3 never came through on any of your attempts. You have the patience of a saint, so bless you. 

(It turns out I have a lot to say on this topic, so brace yourselves?)

By definition, the “dead wife” trope is going to involve some of this, since it’s still totally standard practice to kill off a woman (mother/daughter/wife, but usually wife) to explain a male character’s motivation, and usually to induce us to support him on his vengeance quest. Most of my trash male favorites have or had a dead wife/similar romantic partner at some point, and a lot of the narrative’s success at convincing us that this is a sympathetic character, regardless of the other violent/angsty/anti-heroic things that he does, rests on selling to us that he truly loved his wife (and vice versa, though we also have the Surprise Evil Now Not Dead Wife glares very very hard at Timeless) and it was a travesty that she was taken from him in an unfair way by people much more evil than him. Since Frank’s entire initial character motivation, for much of his to-date appearance in the modern MCU, rests on getting vengeance (often in spectacular and bloody fashion) for the people who killed his wife and kids, in some sense, yes, that emotional thread is necessary. If we’re going to be like “yeah Frank, shank eight more mobsters!” and continue to see him as someone for whom we have an investment in the positive outcome of his story, he needs to be, in some sense, doing the right thing, however badly or violently. And yes, the Dead Wife and Dead Mother trope for protagonists just… happen a lot. Everywhere.

Next, while fandom is in often many cases predominantly female, it still has a lot, a lot, of internalized misogyny to deal with. Dead wives are viewed suspiciously and as possible obstacles to ships, especially when her widower has moved on to a new canon/onscreen relationship with someone else. By virtue of seeing it develop, viewers are more invested in this one, and when dead wives return for whatever reason, she is often implicitly or explicitly used for ship drama with the current couple (glares at Timeless again). This sets her up to be disliked from the start, since we all know shippers aren’t really the most rational creatures in the world at all times and are eager to look for/invent reasons to dislike a character being outright used to keep their OTP apart. If for some reason Maria DID return to life (not at all likely, if not out of the question in the MCU) I can imagine that she would probably, unfortunately, receive some of the same treatment. This happened a lot in the OUAT fandom, where shippers relentlessly villainized a male character’s past/dead love interest (in this case, Milah, for Captain Hook) because it was somehow felt necessary to make the current ship (CS) more valid if the previous one was discounted. Milah was a complicated character and not one that I particularly personally was invested in, but yeah, we know complicated women get turned into “bitch” or “ship obstacle” PDQ. Here, again, I am obliged to glare at Timeless a third time. And when she and Emma met in canon, it was respectful, they both worked together to save the man they loved, and then Milah got fridged AGAIN, which was pretty rage-inducing even if you didn’t like her all that much. Also, the OUAT fandom was extremely tribal in the shipping regard as it was, so yes.

Now, with the overall commentary on Dead Wives out of the way, onto Maria. As you note, and Frank himself notes, he is an extremely unreliable narrator when it comes to Maria. What we know about her canonically/outside his dreams/nightmare about her is the following:

She was Italian Catholic (probably like him) since her grandmother came over from Sicily, and a good cook;

She met Frank in a park by telling him to play a better song;

She got pregnant with Lisa three months into their relationship and told Frank that he could leave if he wanted, but she was keeping the baby, and instead Frank proposed to her that day;

Frank was absent for the birth of at least one and probably both of their children (“we serve 15-month tours in Afghanistan… you leave, you’ve got a pregnant wife, you come back, the kid’s walking”);

By Frank’s own admission, he sometimes preferred to be overseas with his unit rather than at home with her and the kids, which is probably not a reflection on how happy their relationship was, but the fact that Frank really flat-out enjoys being a soldier and indeed, killing;

Maria could probably be very jealous at times and had a hot temper (as Frank tells Karen in the diner scene in DD 2x11, she could be vicious and put him through the wringer emotionally)

She was close to Billy and viewed him as part of their family;

Frank’s last memory of her is her coming to wake him up on the morning after he returned from his last deployment, which is also the day that she and the kids were killed, because they went to the carousel later and were shot. That is the memory that keeps playing in his nightmares/increasingly deteriorates, with him witnessing her being shot in their bedroom and then by himself (which is of course not what happened).

The one time that memory continues on past her just waking him up, in TP 1x12 when Frank is being tortured by Orange, it’s clear that their relationship has suffered from Frank’s long absences and preference to be overseas/at war, and Maria asks him point-blank where home is, says he’s here but not really here, and wants to know if he is yet again going to be mentally somewhere else.

Anyway, all of that points to the fact that Maria was probably a complex human woman, like most women are, and had mixed feelings about her husband’s addiction to war and violence, even as he was by all accounts a good and loving husband to her and father to their children. Frank himself clearly states that he feels guilty about not paying more attention to them while they were alive, so of course, yes, he has valorised their memory and put them on a pedestal and made them the all-consuming reason for his vengeance. I’d say that part of his motive is to keep punishing himself, as well as the actual killers, over his guilt and regret about what he lost with them – some of it unavoidably, and some of it by his own choices. As he indeed says to David, their relationship was not perfect, because no one’s is, but now he only remembers the nice/good/beautiful parts of it. Which is a fairly understandable response to losing a loved one, especially in a horrific/traumatic way like he did.

And yes, exactly, the tragedy is that we DON’T get to know Maria outside Frank’s highly idealised and increasingly fantasised memories of her. She is dead, and he continues to struggle over and over with that fact, even as there is an awareness that he is starting to move on. He already compared how he feels about another woman (Karen) to how David feels about Sarah (his living/current wife). In some sense, Frank has started to/to some degree already fallen in love with someone else, and the entire end of S1 was him coming to terms with his trauma in some part, having to let Maria go (“come home, Frank” / “I am home”) and figuring out how his life looks now. But he clearly loved her very much, she loved him the same, and he’s willing to burn down the world for her and for their children, so we certainly can’t say that she was anything less than someone he loved with his whole heart and soul and had built a life and family with, with all the problems that go with that. And that should definitely be defended.

#maria castle #frank x maria #anonymous #ask

[mianmimi]

Dude, you have the junior novel? Give us the good stuff! I actually love the novelizations because they're script-based, so you get to see what was an ad lib and what got cut. I get the feeling that most of the beautiful gay shit was purely Chiwetel and that Mordo in script is just a charmless str8 tough guy tbh lmao

This is going to take a while Nonny so buckle up and let’s go! I can’t outright screencap the novel cause of copyright so I’ll just write out brief summaries of things that were omitted from the film.

When Stephen is taking that fateful drive and making a phone call, the movie has him talking to Billy. In the novelization he’s talking with…..Claire. Now it’s not specifically stated that this is Claire Temple but like, come on. They both work at Metro-General, she’s a nurse, and nurses often float from one department to another. Also doesn’t that make you wonder if she and Christine met? :D *eyebrow wiggle*

We’ve all seen the deleted scene of Stephen and the wounded dog (that looks just like him, I see what you did there Scott Derrickson). But what didn’t make it to the screen was the scene before that. Stephen’s asking around for where KT is and Mordo notices him. Stephen comes across a kid begging for money. Stephen gives him the last bit of his money for directions to KT. Kiddo points to a direction. Stephen makes a snide remark. Kiddo speaks in English and tells Stephen that he’s the beggar not him, making Stephen smile. It’s a cute little scene but I understand why it was cut. Makes me wonder if he was part of KT and gets kicks giving different directions to people seeking it out, only giving the correct directions if the person parts with the last of their money. Just another headcanon. Who knows?

And now we get to Mordo’s great appearance. And he’s rather pissed D: Like he doesn’t come off as the calm, gentle Mordo we see on screen. He’s described as being uncomfortable talking with Stephen, and he looks annoyed with Stephen’s comments, even glaring at him. He’s more business minded here and doesn’t really give off that compassionate, soft spoken vibe when we first see him.

When Stephen gets a room he thinks the book on the table is…well, a book. But really it’s just a tablet in a case that looks like a book. KT’s keeping up with the times.

There’s a sweet little paragraph just describing a tree in the courtyard, and Stephen realizing it’s been forever since he noticed how beautiful flowers are. Idk, it was just really sweet and spoke to how Stephen’s now appreciating things he didn’t before.

Wong! Ah! Wong my man, Wong! He’s described as being a large man, a stern teacher who watches his students like a hawk as they train. Very drill sergeant like. Stephen’s one of his students, and Stephen’s trying to copy the other students trying to conjuring runes. He’s scared of Wong hahaha. Intimidated. Thinks that Wong’s powerfully built beneath those robes (Yes for you Worange otp-ers, that’s pretty much directly from the book….Stephen think’s Wong’s BUILT) Also, Stephen knows that Wong’s not someone you mess with. He too, glares at Strange.

Wong judges Stephen. Glaring, staring, eyes narrowing, his motions revealing that he’s annoyed with Stephen saying he’s already read through the books he was given. Pretty much says that Stephen isn’t funny.

This part hurt me nonnies….Mordo looked embarrassed when Stephen couldn’t conjure the portal with a sling ring while The Ancient One was assessing the students. He felt like a bad teacher for Stephen’s inability to make a portal ;___;

Super cute confirmation that the Everest Test is a favorite teaching method of The Ancient One. Mordo doesn’t like it. This part is more in line with the characterization we see on film. He was about to go save Stephen but TAO makes it clear that he won’t lift a finger. When Stephen finally returns he looks at TAO with a ton of anger and wanted to rant but he was too happy that he conjured a portal that he doesn’t.

GUYS. NONNIES. The classic training scene…..occurs with Mordo removing his shirt, leaving his entire torso exposed to Stephen. Our baby baron has a lot of scars on his skins though :( And Stephen noticed bullet wounds. Like the fuck right? And Stephen wonders what Mordo’s backstory is cause…that’s a lot of story written on his skin.

Oh god I wish I could screencap this cause man oh man….Stephen and Karl’s training is laced with a lot of flirting. It’s probably meant to be playful banter but like…I’m reading it with my shipper heart and I’m gonna say it’s flirting. Stephen asks questions about TAO and Mordo makes up these obviously silly answers like she was born from the tree thousands of years ago. Stephen actually believes him and Mordo LAUGHS and tell him he’s just kidding, only to tell Stephen another obvious lie that TAO was a hitchhiker who wandered in and never left. Once again, Stephen falls for it and once again Mordo’s…giddy XD And yes, he’s still shirtless while all this is going on.  Mordo teases him, while smiling, saying “Look at you, Doctor I-Don’t-Believe-in-Fairytales- ready now to believe anything I say!” I haven’t done sources in forever but that’s the direct line from the book, not mine.

While teaching Stephen about relics and simultaneously beating him up, Mordo and him are joking and laughing and just having a very good time ^^ They speculate what TAO’s actual name is. Stephen believes she looks like an Elizabeth. Mordo beats him in the sparring session and ends it by saying that she looks like a Catherine. Of note, fanon’s headcanon that Karl loves romances seems to have made a weird retroactive cameo her. Elizabeth Bennet and Catherine Earnshaw are the heroines of Pride and Prejudice and Wuthering Heights respectively, novels that people have headcanoned are among Karl’s favorites.

The novelization ends right after Stephen messes with the Eye and Kaecilius attacks the London Sanctum, so unfortunately we never get a description of Mordo and Stephen’s argument or Mordo leaving. The novel’s also structured oddly with a lot of flashbacks. One chapter has the time moving forward and the next one talks about what happened to lead Strange in the past. Weird but kinda fitting for the time theme.

I also have another novelization called…*deep breath* Marvel’s Avengers: Infinity War: The Heroes’ Journey (Road to Infinity War). Yes my dear nonnies, that’s the entire title. Whew. It’s a long book and honestly I was only really interested in the DS section. I think they complied a bunch of other novelizations together into this big one. What I like about this book is that it’s told through the pov of side characters. Like Captain America’s section is told through Natasha’s pov. I did read this section and it made me really feel for her :( I think they kinda did her an injustice on screen. Nat’s got a very big heart y’all, and she loves Steve. Not in a romantic sense either. The vibe I get is more that of siblings/really great friends, and she wants his happiness so much.

But anyways, back to DS things…..Wong is the pov character for the DS section. He journals to unwind and de-stress, it’s his major coping skill so to speak. He rips out pages in his journal in a rage when he gets stuck or doesn’t feel like it’s good enough. Relatable as fuck. It’s heavily implied that he and Mordo were really good friends and gossiped about Stephen. So yeah, Wong knows a lot about Mordo and understands how dangerous he can be when hurt. I think Worange fans should check this novel out as it has Stephen constantly trying to make Wong smile and Wong being very -__- about it at first but slowly warming up to him :)

#ask and answer #thank you nonny #strordo #stephen strange/karl mordo #otp feels