#but i hate when ppl think im a liar

[103-fevers]

.

#all i can do is try not cry #and fuck this #i shouldnt be crying #but i hate when ppl think im a liar #but I'll never change your mind #you never lik4 me #you like an idea of me #go fuck yourself #i desperately need a hug

[echo-s-land]

It's insane how most of the time I don't get how ppl interact and I also Don't Fucking Care

#vent ig #i wish i could #but unfortunately i havent had the occasion of sharing one of my interest with you in the past three months and when i did it didnt go as i #wanted and now we're supposed to talk through smalltalks except i dont know how to do those so im awkward as hell and unconsciously cut the #short and now im being hated (?) even tho that wasnt my intent #but i guess no matter how trustful i am i just look like a liar #and i cant even bring myself to care bc how am i supposed to explain myself when youre convinced what i say is a lie #we werent even supposed to be this close so sorry if im stiff. i tried to get along but i just cant #the never ending circle between 'i want to have ppl to interact with being alone to experience this world is exhausting and dreadful' and #'im not even remotely interested by any of you' #its different on tumblr bc i can curate my own experience & nobody comes @ me when i dont interact with them for days or weeks (BC IVE GOT #NOTHING TO SAY) and its okay and its normal and we dont have to do the 'hi how are you wyd' script every single time (sure we can check up #on each other once in a while but it doesnt become a script. it feels genuine.) #anyway. im so normal. i can def care about ppl that have never been as insane as me about something we both love(d at some point) #am pretty sure i developed 'i perceived you saying/thinking One(1) bad thing about me and now i dont care at all about your existence' as #a child as a coping mechanism but goddammit i feel like an asshole everytime it happened #i hate feeling apathetic #and i hate lying too so i cant just say shit to reassure them when i dont mean them #cant tell them im sorry about how my behavior is perceived when im so damn tired and would rather they disappear of my life

[saltedcoffeee]

v amused at how fast the cast accepted david's personality change like ah yes this must b his True Self for sure he's an asshole MF HE'S STİLL LYİNG ❗❗❗❗

#hes definitely lying less than before but once a liar always a liar hes overplaying it guys!!!! #if u compare this to what teruko caught him muttering to himself it doesnt rlly fit tbh #think abt it this is the easy way out. play into the secret make ppl suddenly hate u n vote out of emotion n then die. thats it. #xander voice i could fix him #ppl who criticize his breakdown r stupid btw m not pulling punches u guys dont have basic media comprehension skills #'hes so ooc!' i am holding a very large rock over ur head #the cast when a liar lies and manipulates 😰 #im so sorry abt the drdt fixation im trying to get better (lying) #danganronpa despair time #drdt chapter 2 spoilers #david chiem

[starslightstarsbright]

I went to a book club today.

#to speak or not to speak #having my brain sucks #bc i had ppl ask me if i was invited when it was first established (i wasnt) #and then someone asked the woman setting it up why i wasnt #and she said to that person ‘i didnt think they (me) would be interested’ #but in the text they sent me later she just said ‘i dont think you were here when i was talking about this’ (i wasnt) #but now its in my head (esp since im not in the gc) that maybe they didnt actually wang me there #want* #but its like #i know these ppl and i know they arent liars like that and they always say that they like me but i just #idk #esp bc when i told my parents about it they were basically like ‘oh so they didnt actually want you there they badically just gave you a #pity invite bc you bothered them’ #and its like no!!! i didnt even bring it up! and when ppl brought it up to me i tried sososo hard to make sure i was very neutral abt bc #i didnt want anyone to feel weird abt me not getting an invite originally #and like i had a really good time! and every one else seemed like they had a really good time! #but ugh! its just going to be in my head so much that they dont want me there anx i hate it #i hate that i think like this about ppl who are literally so nice and kind in every interaction #it just sucks :(

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

literally what is the point of life if i cannot make things

#srry gomna delete this ina minute but i ha v to fucking scream #im so. useless @ literally everything like. #all i do is sit here and listen to shitty music and cry and go to my stuoid job that i hate and never accomplish anything #tell myself 'yeah ill draw when i get home'and then picking up my tablet pen makes me want to kill myself #even when i can bring up the stupid energy to make something it turns out bad and gets a total of 3 reblogs all from myself like.ok cool #guess ill die #'dont tie your attention to your insecurities' ok cool nice to hear from you and your hundreds of nice comments and likes and #gruhhggghghhh #ive never made anything good in my life and anyone who says otherwise is a liar #like. theres no scientific hard evidence so like. even when ppl r like noooo ur sooo talented uwu its like #so fucking surface level pandering bs like. ok if that was true why does nobody like. ever look at it or think about it or anything #yeah I think my stuff is cool but a huge part of making things is sharing them with other people snd ehen other ppl r like. yea ok cool die #its like. wow i never want to create anythjng ever again #im just not good enough and i never will be and all of my ideas can be done by someone way better thsn me so whats the poin in even trying #i will simply just tell my ideas to peoplewho r better than be and watch them reap the benefits without anything in return ever #guess ill fuvking die

[ardourie]

ok cool ig im name dropping then, u are literally making up headcanons about me based on fucking nothing, i didn’t exclusively focus on the flaws of white trans people over cis white people if u actually read anything i posted instead of believing anons randomly accusing me of things you’d see my only issue is white people like YOU because you are white

watering down the impact of racism and pretending that it isn’t as harmful when coming from queer people as if being queer is an inherently purifying or redeemable action, this website is overwhelmingly trans, our circles are majority trans, getting into disagreements with trans people on here is going to happen bc of how many queer people there are on this platform, if the only people you claim i harassed are users like ratliker i don’t want to fucking hear it, i’ve been having people call me a terf for years bc of standing up to her racism and black genocide denial, every single fucking time someone on here does something racist and a brown person points it out ppl around you run to call them transphobic, like ur doing right now! the second sentence of her post literally says i deserve to be called a terf for just talking about the racism happening on the poll, she said that HERSELF

i said hussie has done racist acts and has racism in their comic, that doesn’t make hussie evil or fans of it evil it just means we should actually acknowledge its there and not have viral post going around claiming that none of what hussie did was that bad bc they’re trans and if ur bothered by it ur automatically transphobic, as if that isn’t an incredibly fucked up thing to say, bc u said that urself on ur blog multiple times, here’s my original and ONLY post that made someone go and tell plaidos i sent death threats when that wasn’t remotely what i was saying

plaidos posted this ask that immediately had ppl in my inbox calling me a terf and bigot for harassing a trans girl (hussie) and saying im a horrible person for sending death threats when i NEVER did that, had no reason to, and hussie isn’t even ON tumblr to do that

she also stated that she meant i “started” the death threats instead of sending them which is still a fucking lie bc the poll that i was referencing was posted FOUR days ago and has ppl fighting and talking about death threats about hussie before i even knew it fucking existed, and she would know bc she was arguing under the post four days ago HERSELF

how did i start death threats on a post i didnt find out about until 4 days after people were fighting under it? how the fuck does that work?

she then went on to slip up and reveal that she subconsciously thinks the queer community is only white bc when ppl complain about white queers they r complaining about latent racism, bc brown people exist in ur community and acting like poc criticizing white people (who will always be white no matter the other identities they have) means u hate queers is racist as hell

shit like THIS is what hussie was doing on a constant basis

these are just two examples you could google “homestuck racism” and find much more my only point that i ever made is that it’s insensitive and fucked up to act like anyone who doesn’t like or even hates homestuck for its racism is a transphobe or evil instead possibly someone deeply affected by hussies racism, and plaidos was under the original poll post i referenced arguing with black people calling them liars for saying hussie is racist and has antiblackness in his work:

if you recognize hussie is racist and has racism in their work why the fuck are you arguing with black people about that fact? why are you pretending people are lying and making up rumors when hussies racism has been a known fact for a literal decade at this point, hussie was quite literally responsible for a boom in antiblack racism online in the early internet you cannot be so dense as to not acknowledge this, and i want to clarify im literally a homestuck fan, homestuck meant so much to me as a kid, and bc of that i know that online spaces for homestuck treated black people like absolute shit for complaining about the racism, i was bullied and harassed so much for even being upset at characters in the comic using the n word or mocking black people, im criticizing it bc i care about it being such a large phenomenon responsible for the normalization of my oppression.

not going over the homestuck racism workshop thing bc u ppl r being purposefully obtuse and i already talked about it here

if you don’t believe me, please go ask the people accusing me of these things for screenshots of me sending death threats, ask them to show that i have no transfem friends, ask them to show it bc every fucking time theirs never any proof, stop believing ask u read about me with no proof stop believing rumors, put urself in the shoes of others, would you want hundreds of ppl sharing post saying you did something you didn’t fucking do with no proof? ask yourself why you don’t see many black people speak out on racism on here and ask urself if maybe it might correlate to how we get demonized for it, if you think callout culture is bad why participate in it in a way where you don’t even have photo evidence backing for what your sharing

lastly, u people keep going on and on about the company i keep but are the same ones cropping out the trans girls im friends with and constantly talking to on my blog, you did it with the last situation regarding aaron bushnell you did it with the previous pregnancy callout, yall literally accuse every trans girl around me of being self hating or theyfabs, random trans women who simply shared my opinion have been harassed and accused of being sock puppets, i have a whole post about that in my pinned, but u don’t care, it’s easier to make me a scape goat and deflect criticisms of racism despite you being white and unaffected than it is to simply go “yeah some people are gonna hate media that has racism in it and that isn’t indicative of anything other than hating racism” your fucking white, can we be serious right now, you published ask saying i was sending death threats to hussie when that never happened and accused me of starting the anger on a poll i never reblogged that a bunch of my trans girl mutuals were complaining about 16 hours ago, so which is it? transfem opinions matter to you or they don’t? bc it seems like u just pick a fucking choose which girls to listen to and like randomly going after black people for not liking antiblack racism

#drama

[arty-cakes]

being both a bretta and zote fan is so so painful actually ppl will always find some way to make sure they never interact again or use the latter to (seriously) demonize zote for stuff he never did while also mischaracterising bretta and i 💥👊💥🥊👊🤜🤛💥🤜👊🤜💥🤜💥🥊 🤜👊👊👊🤜💥 im not good at putting into words why this is frustrating

either make them divorced mortal enemies or reluctant friends who actually enjoy eachother's company either of those are funnier but why make up stuff that didnt happen and then pretend its canon and the reason why they should never talk again..... thats so boring

i was gonna leave this in the tags but no i wanna talk

i know im complaining here but its honestly not an issue i see a-lot like i do see them being enemies or friends in fancontent and to the ppl who do that ily very much. its always cool. and people like my dynamic too and when they let me know it makes me rlly happy lol

but i feel like people need to understand that not every situation is good or bad sometimes they are just. situations. like bretta and zote

and i still feel like there's this general misunderstanding about zote that needs to be cleared up which is that he's not actually.... a liar lol. or i mean the only person he lies to is himself and he's not pretending to be a knight he really BELIEVES he's a knight. don quixote coded like he rlly believes he killed the vengefly king and won the colosseum tournament and whatever. all confirmed by his dreamnail dialogue like it makes it REALLY CLEAR that he believes what hes saying. he's actually having delusions thats why most people in hollow knight choose to help him out its why he cant process life threatening situations. he's still annoying just because of his general personality but NOT because of his delusions. (i'd say something profound about how usefulness ties to worth in most people's subconscious and its rooted in ableism and its why zote hate is so loud and normalized but i dont know how to) basically he is not out here 'manipulating' anyone wtf

bretta's delusional too btw the game literally calls her out (gpz godhome description i think). personally i like that canon decided these two should meet and the result was this awfully tough dreamgod that u can fight 10x that's hilarious to me. if a fan made this up and it never happened in canon i would be like 'holy shit this should be a dlc this WOULD happen' because these two are just like that

also people seriously forget that bretta didnt just leave because of zote she left because of ghost too. girl just had enough of short knights ok she was done with both of them if you bring her back to town she's not suddenly gonna realize ghost is heroic and cool and be apologetic and want them back and zote's mad and jealous. <- this out here is mischaracterising ALL 3 of them its so juvenile what.... and i just dont think she'd care that much about either of them, a lot like how zote barely gives a shit about the infection or never realizes she left, they both have tunnel vision these two are the same do you see it

also tell me he was lying when he called ghost a beast because they are thats all they've been striving for this is a compliment to them i know it

this isnt reallyyy a rant. its a personal grievance because i like them both so i care about their portrayal and interactions and i like it when they aren't lonely. but also they're really light-hearted characters so why not just treat them like that....they go through shit and then they move on easily and go through it all over again. its been 7 years can we cut them a break. i dont wanna see anymore mischaracterising unless its really funny

#i get that this is specifically a hk fandom problem #so my only real solution was to leave the fandom 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️i dont engage with it that much anymore i usually talk to my mutuals+friends #it actually has made me happier! #and yeah there are a lot of fandom problems here i usually ignore them but this is one i actually want to call out a little

[skitterplant]

ok i have.. soo many thoughts about ur fic rni usually dont read or look through content with fem yns since it (personally) makes me uncomfy, but for some reason the way u write this one makes it very easy to actually read and not feel like im being forced into the role of Woman™️ (im ftm and its really frustrating how common that feeling is with fics). this yn actually feels like her own person which actually makes reading this a lot more interesting as well. something about the way she just... is is fascinating to me

anyway- i have sooo many questions, tho mainly about the yn. i dont expect any answers at all, im just throwing these for ur entertainment to witness

wtf is going on with yn? she clearly has a motive but wutever it is i cant pinpoint it. could possibly be something to do with fazbear? at least based on how she said that "while i hate ur attitude i hate liars more". if so, then y only target the dca? y them in specific? or does she have effects all over the pizzaplex?

also something ive been thinking about was that one conversation at the end of chapter 5 between the mechanics moon overheard. i wonder if that was some form of foreshadowing? maybe something about yn? or maybe it was simply just a point where moon realizes how little he knows about humans. (tho something i will note is that its actually somewut common for kids to just randomly kill or hurt animals. often times its out of curiosity to test the limits of things. usually wut stops kids from doing it is other ppl finding out and scolding them for it, therefore teaching them it isnt something "good" to be doing)

im just. so fascinated with the yn. while her actions r absolutely frustrating and makes no sense i feel as tho theres a reason behind it other than sadistic enjoyment (bc she didnt even seem to enjoy the times when shed hurt them, just annoyed)

im absolutely hooked on this now and i dont think im escaping any time soon OTL

The fact that you've picked up my work and enjoyed it despite usually avoiding this type of MC is a big, big compliment!

I wish I could answer properly because your questions are extremely important to the plot points I'm ACHING to get into😭😭😭 Really just went and tickled every sore spot on my brain, you sly weasel :/

Just know that your thoughts made me very happy. Thank you!!!

#ask me #ask overshadowed #overshadowed

[tirfpikachu]

hey! i have a question i just stumbled across ur blog. im a cis woman and always was super fine with being a cis woman, and i have many trans women friends! and they all recognize that i have been thru a lot and still go thru a lot with men hitting on me and harassing me and i havent experienced trans people ever being sexist or anything. the only thing i ever heard that was odd was a girl claiming trans women also have a monthly cycle but im not educated enough on it to know if it is true or not. is the sexism the type of stuff that goes on behind closed doors or is it just some of the people you interacted with specifically? im just curious how common these beliefs are in your opinion!

i think the majority of trans people are not sexist nor misogynistic. but i believe there's a minority that is being brushed under the rug, seen as just radfems cosplaying as trans to cause trouble, not worth talking about, and anyone pointing it out is told either it doesn't happen or most trans people aren't like that, so you're not supposed to talk about it, and the victims of the misogyny, harassment and assault/etc from trans people (mostly transfems sadly) are ignored at best and usually mocked and harassed by ppl calling them liars. which, of course, isn't unusual for women to experience, but it can hurt worse coming from within leftist communities, especially from other afab people and/or people who live passing as women in society and know what it's like to face such things.

i think there's an issue of people thinking cis women are inherently more privileged, and that amab privilege is not a thing at all, that cis women and transmascs have no right to call out shitty, sexist, misogynistic behavior from transfems. that's the current culture in lgbtq spaces. when you're surrounded by good-hearted trans folks, it's easy to be confused when such things are brought up. all you may think is oh man, those people make trans folks look bad. it's like the boom of detrans people going on; no one wants to talk abt it bc it involves criticizing how trans ppl currently handle gender-questioning folks, and they all hate the idea of slowing down someone's magical gender journey, even if it may come from repression, internalized bigotry, trauma, mental illness, etc. it comes from a good place. like raising a kid with total freedom, it feels more natural and kind. but that kind of hands-off, 24/7 validation upbringing can cause harm to children too later on, and so can this. ppl need to let detrans ppl tell their stories in a neutral, non-judgy way for questioning folks to listen to varied experiences. many detrans folks aren't transphobic, have beloved trans friends, and love nuance. abuse from transfems also comes from the physical privilege and privileged upbringing that transfems had on the axis of sex/agab. they may have been disprivileged in other ways, ofc. based on being gnc they faced things that afab people didn't. but they also need to keep their afab-specific misogyny in check. passing as male will never not be a privilege on a certain axis of oppression. transmascs accept this very easily when they transition, but many transfems refuse to. enough of them that it harms afab people.

there's just this... stubbornness among transfems and transfem allies to acknowledge afab-unique oppression from their upbringing and body type and not be The Most Oppressed. you're not allowed to talk about amab/afab dynamic in a way that isn't about transmisogyny. and it doesn't help anyone! even transfems! you need to come to terms will everything you are, sex/agab included. the reason transmisogyny is different from anti-afab misogyny is because of sex/agab. even without afab/amab terms, we still have tme/tma now. but who can claim transmisogyny? only those assigned male at birth. who can claim anti-afab misogyny? only transmascs and cis women. amab upbringing brings bad behavior because people tell you your body type means you're better and stronger because of your dick and not having tits, because you're not just a hole to be stuffed and impregnated, you instead have the weapon on your body. afab babies are aborted because of their body type. afab bodies are shamed for menstruation. all these things are afab-specific. yet transfems do not allow afab people to say there's an axis of oppression that transfems do not experience and should be good allies for.

there may be MANYYYY transfems who are respectful. and that's great. but afab people are not allowed to speak up and demand it in spaces without being called transmisogynists. the harsh pushback against the term transandrophobia and cis women saying they experience unique oppression was full of harassment and violent threats, including sexual ones, because of their afab body type. the overwhelming majority of transfems still have their penis, and the overwhelming majority of transmascs kept their vaginas. on the basis of sex, people with penises have privilege and are empowered in society, and people with vaginas are vulnerable. even medically, research focuses on amab body which costs some afab ppl's lives. in cultures where medical transition doesn't happen, transfems do not pass as female, and thus don't face misogyny. they only face what we refer to as transmisogyny, which is bigotry against gnc amab people, and not them being seen as women by the average person. and people who don't pass as women don't face misogyny. i think transmisogyny and misogyny are not the same thing. transmisogyny doesn't need one to pass as female to happen, while misogyny does. trans women are ofc affected by what's being said about women in their self-esteem and personal lives, but if they don't pass as women they don't have to fear misogyny irl. AND THAT IS A PRIVILEGE.

this is stuff that should be so obvious and no big deal to talk about. transmascs have very complex talks about their mixed experiences with facing misogyny on the basis of being afab but not in other ways if they pass, or see it as misdirected etc. but transfems do not tend to be open to having those complex talks without yelling bigotry. again, that is NOT every transfem. i think most people, once they deeply get to know someone, will be more open to nuance. but with the average person? with someone who's almost or fully a stranger? often, transfems do not see talks of anti-afab oppression in good faith. hell, they called it bigoted that they were left out and told to be good allies when abortion rights were in danger!!! they would tell ppl to check their transmisogyny, be all woe is me. meanwhile if the roles were reversed, transmascs would admit their fault right away. that is, in part, evidence of afab vs amab upbringing in action. and different upbringings should be talked about. transfem bullshit should be called out. i want everyone to be friends, i truly do. but cis women need to be seen as oppressed too, we can't always be seen as the privileged oppressor when we risk horrific misogyny irl that some transfems don't even face!! and transmasc ppl deserve to be validated on their unique struggles without transfems feeling offended!!! i'm so glad you're surrounded by lovely trans folks, i really am. i am too irl and i love my trans friends. but there's a dark underbelly that needs to be talked about. and things need to change!

#asks #my words #radblr #transmasc #transfem #kicking the hornets nest once more eek!! #tirf #transandrophobia

[stick-ball]

I WAS LOOKING FOR A JEREMY BPD/ANGER ISSUES POST I THOUGJT I HAD SEEN THIS MORNING PLEASE WRITE YOUR HEADCANNONS AGAIN I BEG OF YOU GIVE JEREMY KNOX THE LOVE HE DESERVES

Okay so this is long overdue, but might as well. I guess this is an observation of fandom Jeremy as much as the canon one, so don't come at me.

I dunno read Jeremy as having BPD bcs... bcs honestly have you ever met anyone who has Sunshine shining from their ass? Me neither. Though I have met ppl with severe personality issues who had a coping mechanism like that, of course they weren't young and talented sportsmen looked up to by many ppl and rooted for by many, so they had enough free space and privacy to go absolutely fucked up at other ppl when they were having bad brain hours.

Yes im including myself here.

The name of the game is If I Give Them No Reason to Leave Me They Won't.

Or If I Give Them No Things To Hate Me For They Won't Hurt me.

But spice it up with black and white thinking, paranoia and unhelathy behaviours jumping off the standard spectrum of bottling things out into like, going on a 4 hour run to cool off bcs you are undeserving bcs you are a bad captain bcs you're annoyed at the freshmen bcs they dont care about your shared goals enough and is thay really a them issue? Or is it actually a You issue? Are you blaming others for your own failures again? Look at yourself, you're fucking pathetic, and egoistic at that, you demand things from others but how do you show you care for what others need huh? You think you're a good captain? Keep telling yourself that, before you know it they will all turn against you. Because you're a failure, bcs you cant even make them care? Maybe you're just not a good enough player , or maybe they can see straight through you, see what you are udnerneath the happy exterior. Yo have just not good enough, not trying hard enough, and you want them to look up to.. to That???

Or maybe it is a them issue bcs fuck that, fuck the smiling, fuck the caring, you don't actually care, if they don't care, why would you? 🤔 you don't owe anyone anything you are so done with everyone and everything cant they LEAVE YOU THE FUCK ALONE, HAVENT YOU DONE ENOUGH TO HAVE AT LEAST ONE SMALL THING GO RIGHT ONCE? YOU ARE SO FUCKKNG ANGRY so you have to do something you feel like smashing something, you could, your body is literally a machine, you could show them what you actually think about their Opinions, how pathetic and annoying they are and actually fuck that you have to leave you cant stand being in the same room as them for one second longer.

But the sunshine Jeremy 🌞 exterior slips on so even though you want to crash the doors closed you smile and wave and say something stupid and cheery you even have a fucking spring in your step.

Bcs you're a fucking liar a fucking impostor you can't help it at this point you are a clay figurine that's hollowed out inside.

You are so tired it's like there's a lump of cloth absolutely soaked weighting on your lungs

You actually feel like crying while you wave at alvarez from the stretch of the corridor, making goddamn plans to meet up for group studying maths later in the evening while your lungs constrict holding down a sob.

You hate them all for the next 3 hours.

And then on hour four while you're circling the campus heading back from your walk/jog/run/staring into the distance/jog again you tap into the very comfortable very familiar hating of yourself.

This is a light version of course but I bet Jeremy is that person that dissapears sometimes like at parties ect bcs they are doing some absolutely stupid shit like having sex with a complete stranger or getting drunk but they know enough about the emptiness and self hatred they will feel ten minutes after they succumb to thay behaviour that they learned to do it when the judgment of the ppl who know them won't touch this piece of him. Bcs it feels like a separate piece.

Like he is parcelled into different breeds of fucked up inside and they are all set on a loop in a music playing machine from a highway diner. One song ends another starts you can choose which one if you throw in a dime.

And also we gotta add in the sensory issues, he sees things, he hears them, sometimes he does a dodge while there's nothing coming bcs he thought it was. Some weeks it feels almost he lives from one training to the next bcs he doesn't remember a minute from what's in between. Good thing he taught himself this sunny persona bcs its an autopilot mode that gets him having to answer the least amount of questions when he doesn't fucking remember what happened from 8 am till late afternoon that day.

#jeremy knox hc #just my headcanons #jeremy knox #jeremy knox has bpd #bpd problems #with a douse of #anger issues #on the side #aftg #all for the game #tfc #the foxhole court #aftg headcanon #aftg hc #the sunshine court #tsc #usc trojans #tfc headcanon

[uriekukistan]

Got one for you: top 5 writing pet peeves?

THANK U FOR THE ASK I MEANT TO ANSWER THIS LIKE TWO DAYS AGO BUT I FELL ASLEEP SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG

okay top5 for myself

the word “shrugged”: i swear my characters shrug more in one chapter than i have in my entire life, but i cant seem to get away from the word…although when i put my work into this thing that counts word recurrence, it never makes the top 10, i still feel like i overuse it sm

proofreading: i hate hate hate proofreading….like reading my own writing is just frustrating to me, especially bc i actually write way in advance of when i actually publish it, so things i may have thought were good a month and a half ago i usually end up hating by the time i actually publish them…idk i think a lot of creators are their worst critics, im sure there’s not as much actually wrong w my stuff as i think

mixing action with dialogue: i dont even mind this much when im reading, but seeing a huge section of just dialogue in my own writing has me foaming at the mouth…and i have a hard time visualizing things so it takes me so long to add realistic actions in between certain lines, otherwise i feel like the scene flows weird if i dont do this…

figurative or overly descriptive language: no one has ever said anything bad abt this so i’m not sure why it but i always worry that parts of my writing will come off pretentious? like i’ll write it and be like “wow i cooked” and then i’ll read it back and be like “who tf do u think u are to be writing like that”

writing environment: i swear i need everything just so to be able to write efficiently, its so annoying. perfect caffeination level (not enough = no brain, too much = can’t focus), perfect playlist, comfy clothes and comfy seating position, not hungry but not full etc etc. i can still write without these things but it ends up being slow af. so annoying

top5 for reading others’ writing (ghhhh hope this doesnt come out mean)

poorly formatted dialogue: genuinely if i see dialogue lumped in with paragraphs of text I CLICK OUT im not reading that i’m sorry. it’s a visual thing like it’s overwhelming to read and makes the story flow weirdly, like pleasseeedseese put your dialogue on a new line

UNDERuse of the word “said”: ik this is contrary to most writing advice, but it bothers me fr when ppl go out of their way to avoid words like “said” “asked” “replied”…like sometimes they’re genuinely the best words for the situation, or the synonym that gets used is just not appropriate. when you get into more specific words like that it’s gotta fit well. i’m a big advocate for using modifiers rather than synonyms, like “whispered” “said softly” “said, a hint of softness creeping into their voice” are all different. anyway i hate when im reading and someone uses a synonym for “said” that doesn’t fit the situation

over reliance on physical description for characters: again like the synonyms- time and place. maybe it’s just me, it just feels kinda depersonalizing if youre constantly using physical descriptions when they aren’t relevant, especially in romance. ex: in dancing with a stranger, megumi notices yuuji’s muscles bc he purposely flexes, or the way his eyes catch the sun as part of the “view” on a sunny day, but the rest of they time, he’s thinking of yuuji as kind, warm, talented, etc. it just makes characters feel shallow, and especially in romance, makes the relationship feel shallow. if all megumi noticed about yuuji were his big muscles and loserboy puppy eyes, it kinda cuts the meaning and intimacy from the relationship. also noah fence but it also comes off as kinda lazy characterization

im a liar i cant come up 5 for this i already feel mean for saying what i said 💀 thank u again for the ask !!!! sorry for rambling so much skdjdk

#i fell asleep sounds like such a bad excuse but i swear thats what happened #bc one night i basically jusy passed out early #and last night i spent 3 hours thinking abt one ask 💀

[danepopfrippery]

All of it so good! I spotted the freddie writers i think broken up in a few credits (theyre freelance so makes sense). Clearly death threats worked…dont learn from that.

If somehow ur reading and dont get spoilers coming well they are so its on u at this point. Random thoughts below

*Loved Derek’s fashion choices! Also his lil bat jazz hands flourish srsly a+.

*Nandor…incorrectly…thinking its Guillermo’s bday and throwing him a dinner and buying him a gift was very sweet…despite being book ended between insults about never turning him and Nandor not seeming too worried if he died

*my sis and i clocked right away how he wouldnt let guillermo sit next to him at guillermos special fake bday dinner. Nandor u ho. U make him reas u bedtime stories AND brush ur hair but wont sir next to him cuz horny? I refuse to believe any other reason

*WHERE IS THE HELL HOUND?! I MUST HAVE THE HELL HOUND! And i will be angrier than freddie ep if hes gone.

*is it weird Guillermo went to you…gene and the sire for turning advice after learning its forbidden? Also im choosing to believe this is a new superstition cuz they didnt seem arsed by it

*rip neighbor dude. Ppl are right its plot holey look its still the freddie writers in there ok?!

*sooo much bad turning in these two eps it was srsly keystone cops style and i was laughing my ass off despite being like derek irl

*nadja u bitch. Making nadjita dance and show her pussy is MEAN! You drunken slut. I dis enjoy taint that can write checks tho

*another plothole: it always seemed nandor was as shit at laszlo as hypnosis and i always took it of all 3 he was the worst (nadja the best). Animal control anyone? Well now he gets to be a pig amongst guinea pigs he’ll brag of this forever

*’cuz his brains fucked’ had me rolling. Also laszlo u liar u hypnotized him when trying to kiss him got u nowhere

*i was off my face w drug blood was also a good line

*colin didnt do much here but his waiter job and greek bit were great

*i am glad despite pussy showing nadjita has more movement finally

*laszlo has no god damned right to look that tasty

*the shit and fart jokes were mostly flat. I was waiting for laszlo to say he thought guillermo was hitting on him or something. That said seems we get jealous nandor next week and thats all i want

*poor guide, poor sean. Mikey u cunt

*the quebecois thing delighted my sis who studied there (france ppl hate ice right? But $8 wine is primo so u know)

*poor guillermo. Hes clearly a slayer vamp hybrid and very sad about it. Cant wait to see Nandor learn this. Also u will never convince me he could kill guillermo. Other than his eyes watering Guillermo has beat his ass like a rented mule twice now. Cheating or not (i say not)

*seems death threats also made note of make nandor better cuz hes followed a hippy self help book. Its kinda sweet cuz thats where his minimal kindness to guillermo comes from. I dont believe he ever through benji a bday dinner let alone convinced the others to come along

*colin seems aware hes been out of the job game for awhile but makes no indication if he knows why. Laszlo treats him basically same as always and vice versa

#wwdits #what we do in the shadows #wwdits spoilers #nandermo #nadjita #nandor the relentless fanart #laszlo cravensworth #guillermo de la cruz #the guide #nadja of antipaxos #colin robinson

[limpfisted]

while wyll is a very well intentioned person part of the game is about subverting tropes, and to ME hes MY special princess. he is by no stretch of the imagination “perfect” n hes not SUPPOSED to be perfect, n he has glaring flaws present in the text in subtext that make him very interesting narratively

while wyll trying to fight monsters and devils to save people is objectively good

in dnd, monsters, devils, goblins, even animals in the context of this game. theyre still literally people. theyre capable of language and complex thoughts and motivations

while im not about to be like (fire emblem vc) DIMITRI. KILLS. WOMEN. wyll’s quest to be a generic lawful good human warrior male is not as black and white as he wants it to be

and he can be a hypocrite and a liar

and he can be dumb and needlessly vicious. he stands in the middle of the room with priestess guts and to her face goes “tav lets just kill her. lets kill everyone here lets blow this nasty wench to smithereens” and u have to go priestess guts i am so sorry my friend would fucking say that to you. while we are. trying. to be SNEAKY, WYLLIAM!!

he DOES try to kill karlach. he probs killed other innocent prisoners of zariel. he thought it was the right thing to do, its reasonable. but he still did it. n he never faces tbe consequences or even the guilt.in fact he only faces consequences n guilt when he does the RIGHT thing

wyll IS a very kind and tolerant person to a point but its interesting to see like. who deserves second chances to wyll. and why

like obviously being a generic goblin killer doesnt make u a bad person or anything. its good to kill momsters that are hurting ppl. but hes eventually going to hv to look back on the things hes done for mizora and the devils hes killed, and go “hm.” bc even tho he HAD to do it. he also justified it. and that makes it worse

its honestly kind of interesting he doesnt hv anything to say abt freeing 7000 hungry vampire spawn. n when ascended astarion mentions them, wyll asks how many ppl astarion has killed. “dozens, hundreds?” bro it was 7007 ppl, u know the exact number. he cant even wrap his head around it

like everything else in his life—i dont think he really knows how to weigh the burden of that decision bc he can really never let himself feel the full severity of anything without going “ok moving on” or “let my next action prove my worth.” (ie when he tells karlach hes been a beast but he still wants to prove himself, when u tell him hes a monster, he will still prove himself to the sword coast n be tbeir protector.)

its a very rich thing, hes going on his own little narrative journey here where hes realizing what kind of man and hero he wants to be, same as all the rest of them

n a part of that is coming to terms with things like balduran being a lie, n baldurs gate being so much less than he remembers

something i really enjoy abt the game as someone who considers themself an existentialist is. the burden of freedom. we are condemned to be free. despite the facticities and realities of the world n other ppls reactions to our decisions—we alone make our choices n deal with those consequences

wyll is always, always making the best of a bad situation, hes always doing the best he can, hes always doing what he thinks is right, he always tries to be kind and good and gentle to the people “who deserve it.”

but hes only human, and the road to hell is paved with good intentions

when it comes to morals and “goodness”—sometimes being guided by fairy tales and legends is…. lazy moralizing, that will lead to more pain for everyone, wyll included

wyll DID do good things for the people of the sword coast. and that matters. but u know what. everybodys got something to atone for, pobodys nerfect

again this is not a wyll hate post this is actually a WYLL IS AN INTERESTING CHARACTER AND INTERESTING CHARACTERS HAVE FLAWS post lol. hes really not as goody goody as people think. he loves murder and blood tbh, just u know, the murder and blood of evil doers

#ooc #hc

[dusktarot]

rtdldx spoilers//

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.

.

gonna make my "heres how halcandran/descendant of the ancients magolor can still win" infodump

SO i kind of hate that bit of dialogue from extra mode. it is bad. i am somewhat biased but still.

i think it really flattens magolors character into "lying liar who lies" instead of "lying liar who comes from a mysterious planet that we get to see a peek at, who is something of a representation of the deeper lore there". i think having him just be super interested in ancient stuff is kind of weird considering. like ppl say hes a weeb and yknow thats usually uh Bad. i know im kind of doing a "i can excuse attempted world domination but i draw the line at cultural appropriation" but like it feels different. also i just think it was kind of bad to have fans building up hcs and lore for over a decade then be like Hey. That Was Fake. overall think it was a bad decision. if this was the plan all along it shouldve been in the original game. if it was just added bc it was supposed to be assumed all along There Should Have Been Clues Other Than The Fact Magolor Is A Liar

plus even if he slipped up with the "easy targets" line i dont know if he'd like, let up on the ruse and admit to lying about something prior to the Big Reveal. he did have a carefully crafted persona, methinks. especially if it fooled even dedede and meta knight. but it feels like a purely shock value line. bad. a little funny but it remains bad.

anyways. ways to cope work with what we have canonically and still have that be intact:

-he lied about lying because hes a lying liar who lies

-he lied about lying because halcandra is, in his words, a dusty mess, and he was suddenly a bit ashamed of it and didnt want to actually claim it as his home

-he was telling the truth that hes not from halcandra, but he's still descended from halcandran ancients that travelled elsewhere in the galaxy, whether fleeing halcandra due to the Dusty-Mess-ification or just because they were able to. cant imagine a society with space travel and that much influence on the future of the universe wouldn't end up having cultural influences elsewhere

-he was telling the truth that hes not from halcandra TO HIS KNOWLEDGE he just either was moved away from halcandra when he was very young or for some other reason has forgotten

#babble #kirbyposting #magolor #rtdldx spoilers

[jabberwockprince]

Y'know what hello, how're you doin

This is a free ride to ramble about Any subject that's been plaguing you lately. Go off.

HIII NYM TY FOR THE ASK, IM DOING GOOD

just got back from a trip and I spent most of the time thinking about some obscure ass fandom I was in that just suddenly came back to my brain???????? this fucken movie out of all things came to HAUNT me

red shoes and the seven fucking dwarfs - that movie about body positivity and the pressure of being perceived as ugly in a society that values appearance over everything else and the double standards that come with that, whose marketing royally fucking sucked and made everyone think this movie hated fat ppl???? when the main character is this girl

and she loves herself and is confident and knows that people are most likely to help her when she puts on those red shoes that make her skinny. and the movie pokes fun at all those makeover / sexy protagonist moments in romcoms and shit with genuinely funny recurring gags. like its not a revolutionary movie, but its a pretty good movie with very nice rep and i just KNOW that if it came out during the time ppl were making edits of merida, jack frost, hiccup and rapunzel, they would've ADDED the twink ass love interest guy because LOOK AT HIM?

mf is so 2010's fandom bait its not even FUNNY

like i was obsessed with this movie back in 2019-2020 or so and then a few weeks ago my brain was like "didn't you have. an OC for this?" and i went to check my art folder AND YEAH. I DO HAVE AN OC FOR THIS. I DID MAKE AN OC BASED ON THE QUEEN OF HEARTS AND THE JABBERWOCK

WHY? because theres a character in the movie that is literally. Prince Average. thats his name. hes based on the hunter from snow white and hes the lamest funniest bitch in this movie. i have zero respect for this blond lanky ass twink. his VA made a GREAT job at voicing him and adlibbing his lines bc hes so very hateable in a way thats super fun. i grabbed him by the back of his stupid ass shirt and decided he was my favorite and that i was going to inflict him with infinite amounts of projection and development and depth based on two lines in the movie and a single scene in the credits sequence

and he fucking lives in THIS castle???? sir???????? SIR?????????

"how is this related in any way to your OC, Prince?"

ITS SO VERY IMPORTANT TO ME THAT EVERYONE UNDERSTANDS I LOVE DYSFUNCTIONAL HOMOSEXUALS WHO ARE AWFUL PATHOLOGICAL LIARS, IMMATURE AND SHITTY, AND FULL OF EMOTIONAL BAGGAGE THEY INSIST ON IGNORING TO THE POINT WHERE YOU CANT TRUST THEM WITH THE NARRATIVE BC THEYRE TWISTING EVERY LITTLE THING TO WHATEVER IS CONVENIENT TO THEM.

AND ??? I JUST HAVE. ALL THIS ART ABOUT THEM. AND THEN 5 DOCS DETAILING SO MUCH SHIT ABOUT THEIR RELATIONSHIP AND HISTORY AND PARALLELS AND MOTIFS ???

and then i got possessed to rewrite an old ass fanfic about them and i dont even know how i got here i havent thought about this fucking movie in a year or so

long story short i love latching onto Some Fucking Guy that is Painfully My Type and making him into my own little OC. everyone consider watching the movie, it rlly is pretty funny lmfao

#im not even done talking about them i have thoughts and opinions and so much shit in my brain #do i think about the relationship of two guys who met each other at their most honest. and who drifted apart so violently #that the idea of reuniting is painful bc it means allowing the one person that had faith in them to see how they ended up #anyway. they were also meant to kill each other but we dont have to talk about that #fellas is it gay to befriend the person who was meant to kill you. become codependent of each other. ghost each other for 10 years #and then have the universe force you two back together to break a curse bc even though you guys no longer recognize each other #youre still the only people who actually KNOW the other. in the whole world. the ONE person who tolerates your ass #they cant stand each other. they can pretty much read each others minds. theyre divorced. theyre obsessed. they deserve each other

[charlieisacastle]

today has been shit both irl and online so i feel like talking about what forcing someone to out themselves by making them feel like a bad person does to them as someone who's been through it myself

when i was in 8th grade, i was experimenting with my gender. i was going by a masculine name and was known as a "boy" by some ppl irl

however my best friend didnt really get it. she saw it as me "catfishing" ppl. and for the longest time i saw it that way too...i still sometimes do tbh...its hard to stop believing all the hate you've been fed you know?

my bff got close to a girl that knew the masculine me and as time went on she started being "uncomfortable" about "lying" to her about who i "truly" was.

she started intentionally or unintentionally slipping up and using my deadname or just acting like i was hiding something that the other girl Deserved™ to know. we had many fights over it and i felt horrible. i didnt understand why it was such a big deal for them to know my "real" gender but i felt like a liar and a terrible person

it got to a point where the friend demanded to know the secret by publicly making a scene and almost putting her life in danger. and my friend telling me that if i dont tell her, she will.

so i had to out myself as "a girl" just to escape this guilt i was feeling. the guilt of lying to ppl, putting their life in danger bc it was Obviously my fault (it wasnt), and being a "catfish"

i never recovered from that. i shelved my gender questions after that until i was 19. and even then i didnt come out to anyone irl until i was 20 bc i was scared that i was lying to them somehow and "what if im not actually nonbinary and am making it up?" but also "they deserve to know bc if i dont tell them then im a bad person and catfishing them"

i was always comfortable with experimenting with my gender, after that, i wasnt. and its still a process to unpack all of the guilt i carry with me to this day.

i didnt get to experiment in peace, or just be who felt like being in that moment without labeling myself. i felt forced to come out bc i felt guilty and ppl made me feel like they Deserved to know "the truth"... a truth i myself didnt even understand at the time...

i dont think being angry at the people who forced kit to come out is gonna change anything. they are absolutely horrible people for doing it yes, but i dont think they r mature enough to understand why it was the wrong thing to do in the first place tbh. if they were they wouldn't demand him to come out

but i hope that for the rest of us, it can serve as a reminder to not judge people based on stereotypes and force them to share information they dont want to or arent ready to do so yet.

i hope everyone including kit and the bi/pan ppl in the fandom feel better soon. i love you guys a lot and please take care 💚

#heartstopper #charlie.txt #kit connor #nick nelson