#but i am not quite satisfied with just being a skater boi

[sofiaruelle]

Hey Sofia! are you not going to do Sam's and Elliott's outfits anymore? It's been a while and they're the only ones missing, just wanted to ask no pressures

Well....ngl i wasprocrastinating and .......kindda lost interest????

I'm also pretty forgetful so i also completely forget about it sometimes. Sometimes when i do remember, i keep procrastinating some more in favor of doing another thingAhahahahahahahaha *SW E A TS*

I'll try to finish it by the end of the week....month....

#narwhal speaks #a foiled by my own hubris #but seriosuly having dificulty in deciding what to do with sam and elliot. #yeah established sam as a skater boi #but i am not quite satisfied with just being a skater boi #elliot.... gosh elliot #my dilema of giving him a more land based vs sea based aesthetic is aaaaaaa #like do i make him posh dark academia or lose sea pirate #i havent decided how long has he stayed in pelican town for #or built a very specific headcanon back story for the guy #cause thats how i usually build chara outfits #and oher plethera of other excuses #tldr #will try to get it done by end of the month

[sugar-petals]

I see that lately you’ve been reblogging the ice skating guy. Could you introduce him to us in the caro way??👀

i see, i see. you are falling for the beautiful ice skating guy. with delight do i talk about him. ♥︎ who are you asking about, then?

shōma uno (22) of nagoya, japan, the dreamiest ice angel you will ever see:

lucky newcomer stans: shoma is extremely easy to spot. 5′2, soulful, sparkly, and always headed for the podium because his artistry fucking slaps. this angel is the latest olympic silver medalist ✨

if you see a petite, serious-looking guy with thighs for the gods and impossibly elegant upper body work, you can be sure it’s him.

off the ice, look for this: the supreme doe face. dark uwu eyes, wide baby cheeks, 100% shook. needless to say: it’s over when he looks at you like that. 

something else to watch for when you want to spot the angel. his primary hobby is sleeping lmao! shoma naps everywhere. once, he was so exhausted, he was found cutely slumbering before his olympic press conference. 

meanwhile, his presence on the ice? expressive, alluring, aptly sensual start to finish. sometimes feisty, even. he saves all his energy and then delivers. it’s ballet on blades. the guy puts so much passion into his choreo. 

most well-known are the moments when he ends his program and switches back to his normal cute mode. that’s when you see the puppy gaze return.

bc the thing is: you won’t see shoma’s feistiness elsewhere. the japanese are already very reserved and shy, but he’s made an art form of it. his voice is quite light and high, that contributes to the effect. i have not seen one interview where he tries to stand out or embellish his answers. shoma stays true to his unobtrusive character, you’ll see him spaced out 90% of the time.

shoma is often freightened by social settings and fan service. if you didn’t know how he’s on the ice, you can easily get the impression that he’s avoidant or insecure. but it’s just this: he’d rather be gaming or eating than get animated and play celebrity. you have a cozy introvert here. he’s in the game since he’s 5 years old but still doesn’t show himself off, he’s in his own sphere. 

you might see him look overwhelmed pretty often, but the flipside of the coin is, shoma is humble and doesn’t act out of arrogance. for a skater this great, his ego is minimum inflated. he doesn’t like putting himself in the center. legend has it he could always win gold but takes default silver out of politeness 😂

what he does like and respond to is getting direct praise. shoma lives for encouragement. that shit flusters him immensely, and it’s something he accepts. when he’s uneasy in crowds he doesn’t smile very often. but to this day, fans shouting ‘shoma, you’re so cute’ before he starts to skate has proven to lift his spirits effortlessly. last time it happened, he immediately cracked a smile:

now, there is plenty to compliment. 

i mean, look. the sheer athleticism of this man. god knows how high he jumps.

from facial expressions to hand postures, everything captures the music. he looks fantastic. 

shoma has great sense of dramatism. what you’re seeing is always art. 

shoma’s infamous signature move is the cantilever. you can see why. the audience is losing their minds every time.

what else to praise? the absolutely beautiful costumes. 

shoutout to satomi ito who designs these.

the #1 shoma praise bot is skating god yuzuru hanyu (aka current reigning olympic gold medalist) himself. imagine this: a baby is babied by a fellow but slightly older baby. yuzu said this about shoma: “he is like a puppy!” what you see is what you get, shoma is as adorable as he looks. 

so, yuzu takes good care of him and makes sure smol shoma is always included even if he’s getting shy. even since the early days:

if you ask me, team japan couldn’t be any more handsome and princely. the sheer combined power of cuteness and skill. you’ll hear from these lovelies.

shoma and his younger brother itsuki are also pretty much inseparable. goals, this is the softest sibling insta you will ever see. once again, with sleepy shoma.

baby photos included. faith in humanity restored. 

he also has wholesome interactions with his idol and fellow skater daisuke takahashi. dai is a funky, bubbly personality and complements shoma’s introversion really well. 

another important person to shoma, if not the most decisive recently, is retired world champion stéphane lambiel. yes, this handsome swiss glamazon.

shoma went through a highly distressing period of being coachless last year. he parted ways with machiko yamada and mihoko higuchi (below) who were his coaches for 16 (!) years. they were a dream team.

so that he decided to go for something new ended up as the most heartbreaking shit. he lost his inspiration and will for skating and kept dropping to lower rankings. he broke down in competitions because his fans were cheering for him even if his skating deteriorated and he felt undeserving. 2019 was shoma’s existential crisis. he went to several camps to try out coaches, to no avail.

enter coach stéphane! who started to work with him last winter. oh thank god. lo and behold, shooms has been consistently improving and getting very smiley (!) ever since. these two go together like fries and ketchup. 

so, guess who is currently training in switzerland now. whole new world for the little guy 💕

stéphane is eccentric, cheeky, and bold enough to uplift and inspire him but also “so friendly!” as shoma described him. he praises genuinely and knows how to foster shoma’s talent. their language barrier is also no problem, lambiel is a polyglot. i think that stéphane is off ice what shoma is on ice, this is the perfect exchange. i love this song. 

the ice angel has quickly recovered from his misery thanks to the amount of positive feedback. on youtube, you find multiple fancams of stéphane getting very invested in uno’s performance from the sidelines 😄 shoma adores him and stéphane is a protective ice dad. just look at these two.

there’s no better coach he could have. stéphane’s choreographies perfectly cater to shoma’s poetic interpretation. so satisfying. so impeccable. as dostoevsky said, beauty will save the world.

last japanese nationals in december, shoma even took gold and cried from relief on the podium. he’s improved so much. stéphane will make him go far. 

what convinced him to coach uno was simply this: “his eyes sparkled!”. and yes, there’s hardly anyone who won’t be impacted by this.

this puppy has all of our hearts so let’s send out compliments to him. fingers crossed for shoma’s upcoming competitions and the next olympics where i am sure he will stun the world. i mean, he won gold in the baby boy hall of fame already. he’s a really great artist and soft person who deserves everything. thank you for attending my ted talk.

#shoma uno #figure skating #long post #yuzuru hanyu #stephane lambiel #daisuke takahashi #mihoko higuchi #itsuki uno #anon #cub mail 🐅

[iwanttobeyourwonderwoman]

I can barely breathe when you are near.

I’m just gonna say I totally loved the show. Mad love. 

And in case you haven’t figure it out yet, or watched the show to get it, I’m talking about Ginny and Georgia. 

So many important topics touched on so many feelings and oh so many love triangles.

So join me as i dissect the whole show hehe .

Alright basic plot-

Young single mom Georgia and her teenage daughter Ginny, and younger son Austin, are always on the road and have now moved across the country to the small town of Wellsbury, Massachusetts from Texas, where they encounter a whole load of quirky characters. Ginny, who never had friends, slowly starts fitting in with the popular sophomores, mainly her neighbour Maxine, who also has a twin brother Marcus while Georgia befriends their mother Ellen. The series follows their attempts and struggles of fitting in with the town, all while developing their own love triangles (square in Georgia’s case). And the best part is, the unfolding of Georgia’s dark past filled with teen mom struggles and a little bit of murder mystery as to how she has gotten to where she is now. 

Teen mom and daughter combo again? Been there done that!

Well yes, as everyone compares it to Gilmore Girls (my personal favourite show ever) here are some similarities and differences as well as other show references.

*SPOILERS!!

It does explore that close relationship that Ginny and Georgia have, but obviously the kind of bond that Rory and Lorelai had were a lot stronger and had their own personal quirks and wit. There were often rifts in G&G’s relationship caused by the secrets of Georgia’s past as well as Ginny feeling inferior to her own mother in terms of looks and her ability to be a chameleon to fit in anywhere. Rory was more focused on her grades and was comfortable just having her few friends. Ginny on the other hand wanted to be liked and wanted to fit in with her school friends and eventually becomes part of MANG and the boys. And in the case of the mothers, Lorelai focused on raising Rory and worked her way up to eventually owning her own Inn while Georgia snuck and tiptoed her way around swindling money wherever she could but all in the best intentions of her kids more than herself, desperate to give her kids the life she never had. 

Also in a way I feel like this is also similar to Jane the Virgin except of course Jane’s character is older, but if you take the standpoint of the mother-daughter relationship and love triangle(Jane/Rafael/Michael) as well as a little psychotic Murder mystery Petra vibes.

, I feel like G&G is a good mix of Gilmore and JTV.

When it comes to love interests, Ginny was stuck between boyfriend Hunter and neighbour Marcus. Sweet, innocent Hunter (my favourite character in the whole series because if you know me you’d know I’m a hopeless romantic) was pretty much Dean to Rory, while cool skater and stoner guy Marcus was Jess. And honestly I see a similar trend here where most people are Team Jess/Marcus whereas I’m team Dean/Hunter for the main fact that Dean and Hunter both treated the girls really good and I like that. 

Georgia, as I mentioned was more of in a love square than a triangle, because why the hell not right? There’s Joe, the owner of the cafe where everyone spends most of their time, then there’s Mayor Paul, who Georgia pushes her way to work for to get on his good side. And then of course, Zion, Ginny’s father. Sounds a lot like Luke, Jason and Christopher doesn’t it. I love that Joe had a more interesting and different story, where it was depicted in the flashback scene where homeless young Georgia, just found out she was pregnant at a gas station and comes out to a crowd of high schoolers, which is when she meets Joe. She says to him  “I’ll look you up if I’m ever in Wellsbury” Joe was already attracted to her as a teenager and doesn’t realise it’s the same Georgia he met years ago till the last episode whereas Georgia has known all this while. I don’t know about you but I feel like now Georgia has the funds to move to somewhere she aspired to be, where she knows her kids will get the best and where she received “a sandwich and a pair of raybans that changed my life” Also let me just add that Raymond Ablack (Joe) is INCREDIBLY HOT.

Moving on to Paul, Georgia is attracted to him but there is that underlying greed because Paul can provide her stability and security and power. And that is when she will finally feel like she has achieved wheat she needs to. Towards the end, she almost chooses Zion because of her deep affection for him as ‘her penguin’ as she refers to him as. Being with Zion also means she can let her guard down and relax a little, and obviously is a great father to Ginny and even Austin who isn’t even his biologically. Which also makes both guys equally good contenders for Georgia. 

Another thing I love about the show is MANG. Their friendship is real, it’s not just Abby and Norah accepting Ginny because of Max. Yes Abby did throw her under the bus in the beginning but they soon became really close and never singled her out after the shoplifting incident. It wasn’t a whole case of Regina George and the plastics all over again. They didn’t care that she was different. 

So I feel like Abby is a very interesting character also. I read that her character was created based on a friend of the writer. So abby puts up a very strong front when actually she is feeling quite distraught from her parents ongoing divorce as well as her own issues with body image. Abby is very petite but still is not satisfied with her body so she tapes her thighs to make them look smaller and wear tight jeans so that she can look slimmer. I the Halloween episode, Press even calls her “whale legs” and she obviously gets upset and you can see it affects her because she’s striving for such a perfect image all the time but also I feel like she has a thing for Press so that really messes her up. You can also see she does get a little jealous of Ginny and Max’s friendship but that’s mainly because she feels lonely and unheard and she ends off being estranged from Norah and Max feeling like her whole world crumbled. I really hope MANG gets to patch up. They were the ideal friend group along with the guys.

“Oppression Olympics, let’s go.”

I don’t know guys, this line really stood out to me.

Basically this is the scene in episode 8 where Ginny and Hunter argue about racism and why Ginny deserved to win that writing contest with her unique style (girl used slam poetry for goodness sake that essay was amazing!!??) But Hunter won and he is clearly the favourite of their teacher. He talks about how he is half Taiwanese and the Asian stereotypes he faces here as well as the White remarks he gets from the Asian side of his family. Ginny too says she can’t fit in because she is half Black and how this town had a very small black population and people are not sure how to look at her. I feel like touching on these topics of race was really vital to not only the show but to the actors as well. From the bts, I read that Antonia (Ginny) and Mason (Hunter) were in a room with the writer and jus spoke about the kind of remarks they have personally faced which helped develop the argument scene because it was so real and raw and quite upsetting to watch. It’s something very relatable to the audience which also just amplified that whole episode overall. 

I mentioned earlier my favourite character is Hunter. I admit I have a major crush on both the actor and the fictional character. Ok so I think Hunter was a great character, a very good boyfriend too, I mean look at the way he cared for Ginny, supported her, just that unfortunately she was more attracted to Marcus in the end but also that ugly oppression olympics fight just gave his character more depth to show that Hunter wasn’t as perfect as he seemed. I think girls watching the show deserved to see what a good guy looked like. He was smart, in a band, a very caring boyfriend, popular but not cocky. If you compare to let’s say the character if Peter Kavinsky, I think Hunter made a better boyfriend. DO i also think Kavinsky is a damn dream boat? Of course I do. but then again, I thought John Ambrose was a much better guy in the TATB series. Kavinsky was originally dating another girl before the whole fake couple thing started. Whereas going back to Hunter, he already admired Ginny from the first episode and stayed truly respectful until the end of the show. And that’s something girls should see and aspire to have.

Yes I loved the song I loved the fact that he sang it for her, I am such a hopeless romantic and I absolutely hate that poor Hunter/Mason has been getting a lot of backlash for the song/character. I’ve rewatched a lot of the Hunter/Ginny scenes multiple times just because. Hunter was a good guy. Period. 

So looking forward, I think a lot of important topics were touched in this show, slightly different from let’s say 13 Reasons Why, and I hope that they can continue to delve into those stories such as racism,self harm, body image and so on which really hit home for me. Important discussion topics, important for kids to see like oh hey this character is kinda like me, and if they are facing these issues, how can they get through it?

Also I need answers to all my questions - Where did Ginny go? How does Georgia get away with everything? Will MANG get back together? Does Abby have a deeper story to tell? Do Marcus and Ginny end up together? AND WHAT ABOUT MY POOR BBY HUNTER??? Lots of unanswered questions, lots of stories to dig deeper into, and so many secrets. I loved the mother l-daughter relationship, the same way I loved Lorelai and Rory’s relationship too.

I obviously totally enjoyed the show, I’ve recommended it to many friends and I hope they enjoy it as much as I do, and get more people on my Hunter Chen bandwagon hahahaha! Let’s hope for a season 2!!

Another super long post, finally done. I can move on to watching other shows now (and still constantly wish I too had cool stuff like Sophomore sleepover)

Hate you, kidding! Love you, mean it!

(just gonna leave these here because why not????)

#gituuuu #ginnyandgeorgia

[iggy-of-fans]

Of Being a Ladybug 1.5

Happy Holiday’s! Here is my gift to you!

Previous  Masterlist 

The class, Then 

Monday of the attack

Adrien smiled, satisfied that Marinette hadn’t done anything. He shook his head, ‘really, what could she have done?’ he asked himself. Marinette was a great girl and had designed for or worked with a few famous people, but he doubted that they even remembered a lowly baker’s daughter. He sure didn’t remember most of his fans. He shrugged. Alya really should have just fact checked. Probably an over-zealous fan that sent it to one of the actors mentioned. Marinette also wouldn’t do anything that could hurt Alya. He got to the class and stopped short at the door. There were a lot of long faces in there.

Alya was sobbing into Nino’s shoulder.

Rose was quietly heaving into Juleka’s shoulder as well. Not so much sobbing, but still very upset.

Max sat tense, glaring at his phone, looking like he might set it on fire.

Kim glared ahead at the bored.

Mylene, for once, looked stronger than all the class and like she might punch somebody.

Adrien was confused. As far as he knew or remembered, only Alya had a real reason to be this upset. He frowned.

“Nino? What’s going on? Why is everyone so upset?” Adrien asked, completely lacking the social understanding to perhaps ask someone else. Who wasn’t holding their+

3 crying girlfriend. Nino just glared at him.

It was Alix who answered, “Seriously Adrien? Read the fucking mood. And to answer your question, Lila Fucking Rossi.”

“I don’t understand. What did Lila do?” Adrien asked, passing over the first comment. He just wanted answers.

“Marinette was right. Like always, she was right. Lila is a liar, and a bad liar at that. We were idiots and all fell for it. Rose lost her friendship with Prince Ali because she bought Lila’s tales. Alya is being sued for slander. Mylene and Ivan contributed to her “go green” projects, only for none of them to be legit. Max is being investigated by the school for letting Kim cheat off him and Kim got kicked off the team for it. Then the school NERD club got wind of the napkin incident and apparently even Superman and Wonder Woman can’t throw a napkin hard enough to take out somebody’s eye. And me? I was told I would be meeting pro skater Esmee Visser. We should have listened to Marinette” Alix shook her head. Mari had warned them. Warned them not to cheat, not to listen to Lila, to work their own way up. Marinette always worked so hard but made it all look so easy.

The whole class bowed their heads. Mylene had ended her friendship with Marinette on Tuesday the week before, because Marinette had suggested that she and Ivan not give their combined 400 Euros to Lila’s charity. This morning, Mylene had seen the news coverage of over fifteen people suing Lila Rossi and by extension, Alya Cesaire, for slander, defamation and theft. Lila had been going around getting things put onto tabs for famous people to pay off, claiming she was a niece, goddaughter or assistant.

They waited for Marinette or Lila to come into the class. Marinette so they could apologize. Lila so they could beat her up. When the warning bell rang, and Ms. Bustier entered the room, nobody even batted an eye. When the last bell rang, and Marinette still wasn’t there, they worried. When the sound of a car being tossed through a building reached their ears, the students evacuated.

Alya rushed to the scene. The Ladyblog may be shut down, but she could start fresh. Maybe Ladybug would even call on Rena Rouge! When she got to the scene, Vipereon was hidden on a building with… was that… a new fox? Alya almost started crying again. Another hero made her way there. A new bee, it looked like. And another, a new turtle too. When Ladybug arrived with the dragon, the team huddled for a minute before breaking apart to fight. Alya snuck closer as she watched Guilty Conscience coming at the heroes.

“I never wanted to be a hero. I feel horrible when I have to lie to protect my identity because I hate liars. I wish I had never met the Master or been picked to be Ladybug or had managed to give the Miraculous away before I got too serious. I hate what this has turned me into, I wish I could go back to just being Marinette…”

Alya gasped. Oh! OH! She shut off her video and turned. She’d wanted to earn back her title as a journalist. But not like this. She ran back to her apartment. Not like this.

As Tuesday morning dawned, the class was sitting together again. Adrien kept looking at the door expectantly. If Chat Noir payed a visit to the bakery last night, no body would know. Namely because nobody was there. Adrien’s foot bounced. The minute she walked through the door; he would confess to her.

Nino looked sideways at Adrien. He knew his boy was a bit starstruck with Ladybug. Did he really expect her to come to school, though? Nobody seemed to notice that Juleka was also missing.

Class started, only to be interrupted again when the principle announced all classes should turn on their TVs to the news.

“Good Morning Paris. We interrupt your scheduled programming to bring you breaking news,” on the screen was Lois Lane, world renowned reporter. “This morning, the Mayor of Paris was able to welcome for the first time, Justice League Members Batman and Wonder Woman, to Paris. Already, the world’s greatest detective is solving the matter of ‘who is Hawkmoth?’ and ‘where is he hiding?’. The investigation was started early this morning and is still ongoing now, however, the heroes are confident the matter will be resolved by end of day today. League intervention is also being given to the local Parisian heroes, who are being folded into the League system. The now dubbed Miracle Team will be receiving regular training and adult supervision from the American Heroes. On other news… One moment please. We are now going live to the traffic copter, which has caught sight of Wonder Woman storming a mansion in the heart of Paris. Jean, what can you tell us about the current situation?”

“Thank you, Lois! I am here, on scene as Wonder Woman storms the Agreste Mansion. Parisian’s will remember that Monsier Agreste was Akumatized as the Collector a few months ago. He certainly isn’t putting up any fight, it looks like. And there is Nathalie Sancour. Both are coming out with their hands up. It looks like Monsiour Agreste is doing all the talking. Ms. Sancour is going down in what appears to be a coughing fit! Police is also arriving on the scene. An arrest has been made. I repeat. An arrest has been made! A police car is pulling off, and looks to be heading to Francois-Dupont, commonly dubbed the Akuma school. If I am not mistaken, it is the same school that Gabriel Agreste’s only son, Adrien Agreste attends! AH, one moment. It looks like Wonder Woman is going into the mansion. Paramedics are also pulling up on scene. Ms. Sancour is being taken into an ambulance, but the other set of paramedics is running into the mansion as well. Is that?! It is! Lois, and watchers, for those of you who do not know, this is Emilie Agreste, the wife of Gabriel and mother of Adrien. She went missing and was declared dead three years ago. Paramedics are now rushing her prone body to the ambulance…”

The news continued, but the class was distracted by the door being thrust open. Officer Raincomprix and his partner entered.

“Adrien Agreste, you are under arrest for suspicion on working with Hawkmoth. You have the right to remain silent. Everything you say can and will be used against you” the officer stated, placing the cuffs on a stunned Adrien Agreste. His mouth hung open. What…? And then he heard the whispers.

“He was supposed to start school the day of the first Akuma…”

“Always defending the bully…”

“Never there during attacks…”

He shook his head mutely. NO! He was a hero!

The class watched mutely. Two in two days.

*!!*

Because he was a minor and could prove, behind closed doors, that he was in fact Chat Noir, Adrien was acquitted and sent to live with his Aunt Amilie and Cousin Felix Graham de Vanily. He took off the Miraculous ring. Plagg had told him Ladybug would need her cat. So, he put the ring in the mail to be sent off to Wilhelm with a letter explaining everything. He heard through the news that the Dupain-Cheng family had left Paris in a rush. Nobody was quite sure where they went, though most guessed to China. When he landed in London, Adrien had no idea what to expect. He hadn’t seen Felix since his mother’s funeral. He had also heard that Felix’s father had died not long ago. Felix and Amilie greeted him at the airport with smiles. He smiled and dared to hope.

*!!*

Alya watched the footage of Marinette revealing herself again. She sighed. Adrien Agreste was publicly deemed innocent and sent away. Lila Rossi, while facing several lawsuits, was only being sent to a remedial school at the outskirts of Paris. Lila’s mother, who had been akumatized as Guilty Conscience, almost lost her job. As it was now, diplomatic immunity was the only thing keeping her from being investigated further for child neglect. Alya was still facing the law herself, but being a minor, she was only facing some fines and heavy warnings, but otherwise she was also grounded until she was eighteen. Her parents were disappointed, her sisters avoided her most of the time. School had become her only escape. But even there was no escape from everything that had happened. Marinette was no longer there, and Ms. Bustier was under investigation for the amount of Akumatizations in her class. Mr. Damoclese was as well, for mismanaged funding to the school. Turns out his Owl suit and “weapons” were being funded from donations to the school. The class was split up into different classes too. Divide and conquer. Alya sighed. They weren’t really allowed to interact with each other, for fear of it causing more trouble. But most of the other students didn’t want to interact with them either. Alya had never noticed it, but their class was isolated by the rest of the school.

*!!*

Luka sighed as he watched Marinette walk into the Zeta Tube, her head bowed. Paris had ruined Marinette. He brushed his hair back and looked at Juleka. The news had confirmed that Gabriel Agreste was Hawkmoth, but he had given his Miraculous to Nathalie to get rid of. They were pawned off to another party, but Gabriel had no idea who, and Nathalie went under and into a coma like Mrs. Agreste.

The League told them that they would be receiving training and supervision, as there were Miraculous everywhere now. They would be needed to step in. Luka being the oldest was made the leader, despite not having the ladybug miraculous. He sighed. What a shit show.

< ( ^ ^ ) >

Bruce closed the journal and replaced it in the secret compartment in the desk. He turned to the bed behind him, where his newest ward was fast asleep, tear tracks staining her young face. He wanted to rage at Diana and Clark. He’d petitioned to have Marinette live with him from the beginning, but had been denied because Diana’s mother had been a Ladybug. Reading about what Diana had done to the poor girl, all with good intentions but completely misguided, Bruce was ready to wage war. Marinette had been through emotional hell. He would make sure to do better by her. He swore then that he would give her a family.

#of being a ladybug #Marinette #Marinette deserves better #miraculous ladybug #batman #Wonder Woman #alya cesaire #adrien agreste #lila rossi #lila salt

[choupichoups]

Press F (Instagram/College AU) Ch.15 (FINAL)

Lucas swears he’s the absolute master of undetected stalking. Or: Eliott is instagram famous and Lucas is the disaster gay who accidentally likes his post.

Epilogue will be posted soon! Thank you so much to everyone who’s supported this fic ♥

::::

Whoever thought of going to the skate park in this weather is down right insane. It was probably Basile. Yeah, it was most definitely Basile’s brilliant idea. 

And Lucas is a downright moron for agreeing to it. 

He hears Yann whoop loudly after Eliott does a successful trick— Lucas has no clue what it was even though his eyes have been glued on his boyfriend since they arrived. Eliott refuses to put his jacket back on, saying that he runs way too hot to be wearing it to the park, so Lucas finds himself clutching the jacket in between his arms, looking for the perfect opportunity to throw the damn thing over Eliott’s stubborn head. 

Because apparently this is his life now. Chasing after an errant boyfriend to protect him from getting a cold. 

“Eliott,” he calls out for the umpteenth time, feeling a brand new appreciation for his mother; this must’ve been how she felt like whenever he’d ignore the sound of her voice from the play structure way back when. “Eliott!” he repeats, louder now. 

Thankfully, they’re the only ones stupid enough to be there so Lucas doesn’t have to worry about any dirty looks thrown his way for causing such a ruckus. 

Eliott skates up to him eventually, grin wide and arms held out as if he hadn’t been ignoring Lucas’ voice for at least half an hour. Lucas dodges an attempt for a hug, huffing as he reaches around Eliott to place the jacket back over his shoulders— the slant of the shallow bowl Lucas is standing over thankfully makes up for their difference in height. 

He feels extra vindicated when Eliott is unsuccessful in trying to hide a sniffle. “I don’t care if it’s cramping your style,” Lucas says, tugging on the lapels of the jacket until Eliott’s properly covered in it. “You’re not going to wear just a shirt in negative degree weather.”

“It’s not in the negatives yet,” Eliott mumbles but obediently slides his arms into the jacket either way. A thoughtful look falls over his face the next second and then Lucas finds himself being subjected under an exaggerated pout, complete with sad eyes and hunched shoulders. “Actually you’re right, I am cold. Keep me warm?” 

Lucas stares at him with no ounce of pity. “Go do another trick then, I’m sure the adrenaline will warm you up.” 

“But Lucas,” Eliott whines, kicking his board up when it rolls down to jostle his ankles. “I’m too tired for that.” 

“Sounds like a you problem.” Lucas ducks down, hiding a smile behind his scarf, and moves away from Eliott’s grabby hands again. He hears Eliott huff out a laugh but looking up only has him catching an eyeful of Eliott’s soft gaze, pink lips upturned into a crooked smile. Lucas doesn’t realize he’s stopped blinking until his eyes start tearing up from a cold gush of wind. 

“It is a me problem.” With one hand in his jacket pocket and the other casually holding up his board, Eliott looks every bit the professional model he could be. Lucas tightens the hood thrown over his head and tries not to think about how he must look like some dweeby sock puppet and larva hybrid in comparison. “So hug me.” 

He shakes his head, his entire upper body moving with the act from how bundled up he is. 

Eliott tilts to the side, looking wholly amused. “Please, Lulu?”

Lucas lets out a grunt, hoping Eliott can see his eyes narrowing at the use of a nickname— how dare Eliott use Lucas’ weakness against him?

“Lu?”

He hesitates but stubbornly stands his ground.

“Bab—”

Lucas barely suppresses a squeak before throwing himself at Eliott, effectively shutting him up before he could do something as dumb as calling Lucas baby right in front of their rabid friends. Well, Yann’s still out on the giant bowl teaching Basile how to skate but Arthur is right there, head buried under a scarf and a winter jacket, but there nonetheless. 

Eliott has the gall to chuckle as he basks in the embrace— given under duress, thank you very much, but warm enough what with Lucas’ gazillion layers piled on one after the other. 

“You’re so—” Eliott’s voice is muffled from where his face is buried in Lucas’ shoulder. “Squishy.” He squeezes his arms tight as if to prove a point, like he’s squashing a teddy bear rather than a human being. Lucas feels that he’s in the right to smack his boyfriend upside the head, Eliott’s pitiful yelp notwithstanding. 

“That’s cause I dress for the weather unlike a certain idiot.” Standing on his toes makes him taller from where they’re at so Lucas moves his arms until they fall comfortably around the back of Eliott’s neck, preventing the wind from getting through the exposed skin there. He feels Eliott shiver before a smile is pressed into his neck and lets himself be used as a human heater. 

“If you skate with us, you wouldn’t be so cold.” 

Lucas knows that but he also resents that notion. “No thank you.”

“Does Lucas Lallemant not know how to skateboard?” 

“Does Eliott Demaury want another smack to the head?” 

Eliott laughs, starting to swing them side to side. “Just admit you can’t, Lucas.”

“Can so.” Lucas watches Basile fall on his butt for the thousandth time that day and winces in sympathy. Yeah, no, been there done that. There’s a soft rustling from under him and frankly, Eliott’s arms tightening around his waist should have been a clear warning, but Lucas doesn’t actually react to anything until Eliott hoists him up clear off the ground with a satisfied cackle. “Hey! Wait, what are you— Eliott?!” 

Lucas, rather afraid for his life, clings onto Eliott’s shoulders, screaming close mouthed when he hears Eliott drag his skateboard back by his feet. 

“We’re going for a ride.”

“No the fuck we are not, put me down right now!”

“Come on, just a little bit, it’s gonna be fun.”

“Falling and cracking my head open isn’t my idea of fun.” He squirms in Eliott’s grip, feeling kicking out in hopes of feeling the gravel back underneath them. “If you get on that board right now I swear you’re… you’re grounded.” 

That gets a delighted laugh out of Eliott. “Yeah?”

“Yeah. Time out too.”

“Who are you, my mother?”

“No, but I’ll tell my mother that you attempted my murder this very day if you don’t put me down.” 

Grumbling protests aside, Eliott’s pretty quick in relenting after that. He walks the both of them up and out of the ramp and only then does Lucas’ heart stop fucking palpitating. God, he’s going to get a heart attack from one of Eliott’s stunts one day. 

Eliott does bring his board up with them, however, and Lucas hears the scratch of its wheels as he kicks it up the pavement. To his credit, Eliott puts him down as per demanded, but the unsteady surface below his feet clues him in that his asshole boyfriend didn’t quite place him on the ground. 

Thankfully, being best friends with Yann ‘Skater Boy’ Cazas does come with perks; Lucas hadn’t been lying about knowing how to ride a stupid skateboard. 

“I’m sorry, please don’t make your mom call the cops on me,” Eliott apologizes, leaning close to steal a swift kiss from Lucas’ cheek and of course Lucas readily forgives him because he’s apparently weak against cute boys who rightfully fear his mama. Very, very weak. 

He pretends to think about it though, biting back a grin as he slides his hands down to fold his fingers between Eliott’s— he’s standing all wrong on the skateboard and his balance is off so he keeps a tight grip on their connected hands to prevent any accidental wipe outs. “Hmmm, I don’t know…”

“Please. It’ll be awkward if my dad has to visit my place only to arrest me.”

Lucas pauses at that, wobbling on the board enough to probably fall over if it weren’t for Eliott’s steadying hands. “Uh, your dad’s a cop?” 

Whatever lighthearted expression had been on Eliott’s face is gone now, which is unfortunate really. Lucas and his dweeby hybrid self had been enjoying it. He knows there’s probably a conversation to be had there somewhere. Just— preferably not in this minute.

But Eliott simply nods, his calculating look melting away into a playful smile. “I let that one slip during a live once, you don’t remember?” 

And thank god for sensitive boyfriends. Lucas takes the smooth misdirection and runs with it. “Alright, let me clear this up.” He pauses for maximum dramatic effect. “Contrary to popular belief, I have not seen every single one of your posts and stories and lives. Okay, maybe I’ve seen all of your posts but I swear I’ve only seen your live once.”

“Uh huh.” 

“It’s true!” Lucas tugs on their hands, rolling himself closer to Eliott that way. He digs his chin into Eliott’s chest, looking up into those dreamy grey eyes. 

He can’t believe he just unironically used the word dreamy.

“Okay, so you’re a fake fan then.” Eliott’s smile is too soft to back up his teasing. 

Lucas straightens up, lifts his heels that minuscule bit until his lips are level with Eliott’s. “Sorry this fake fan tricked you.” 

Eliott takes it upon himself to brush the tip of their noses together, the perfect balance of gentle and fleeting that has Lucas tilting up for more. “And how is this fake fan planning to apologize?” 

Lucas huffs out a chuckle, shaking his head before slotting their lips into a small kiss. “How’s that?”

“Mm, no, do it again maybe.” 

There’s a sharp flapping sound by their feet and it distracts Lucas enough to delay the second kiss he’d been planning to deliver. He looks down only to see Arthur staring up at them, phone in hand, evidently unimpressed. Lucas had honestly forgotten about him. 

“Do you guys mind?” Arthur gesticulates between the three of them, the vague hand movements has his jacket sleeves flopping about and hitting the pavement. Lucas thinks he gets the gist of what he’s trying to say. Doesn’t mean he cares all that much though. 

“No we don’t mind, actually.” Eliott retaliates, all cheeky and faux oblivious. Lucas bursts out laughing. 

“Just like, take ten steps away from me.” Arthur sits up, shooing them away with one hand. “If I take off my glasses I won’t be able to see how loud you guys are being.” 

It’s a testament to how Lucas is trying his best shot at maturity when he doesn’t roll his eyes immediately. 

“He’s so bold.”

“It’s okay, Imane likes him back.”

“Yeah but I mean, isn’t it a bit intimidating crushing on your best friend’s younger sibling?” 

Lucas shrugs, head perched on Eliott’s shoulder as he absently looks down at Eliott’s phone, where Emir’s cataloguing exactly why he needs to be the most handsome guy at the party later so that Imane would pay attention to him. “Not if it’s Abe. He’s super nice and Emir’s a good guy too so I don’t see why they’d have a problem with it.” 

Eliott takes a moment to respond to Emir, snorting at the immediate barrage of responses he gets. “Still though, what if things go wrong? It’s scary.” 

“Shit happens.” Lucas shifts until he’s able to lay down on Eliott’s lap instead. “So you mean if Lucas 324 is Eliott 324’s best friend’s brother, he wouldn’t go for it? Cause it’s scary?”

The rapid texting above him stops, and Lucas peeks one eye open to watch the disapproving frown on Eliott’s face. “Well if that’s the case, then Eliott 324 better step up.” 

Lucas scoffs, “I’m sure every version of you is charming and perfect and ideal.”

“I can’t tell if that’s sarcasm but thank you either way.” He leans down and rains kisses all over Lucas’ face until a giggling Lucas pushes him away, insisting that his words are a hundred percent sincere. “You have way too much faith in me and my alternate selves. For all we know, Eliott 324 is a massive jerk.” 

“That’s tragic.” Lucas tugs on Eliott’s hand until he has it buried in his hair, fingers carding through the strands in soothing motions. Eliott laughs at his content sigh but he doesn’t care about the inevitable cat jokes when he’s the one who’s really winning here. “Lucas 324 doesn’t like jerks.”

“Very tragic.”

The sound of shoes hitting the metal staircase is loud in the empty building. The footsteps gain in volume the closer they approach, but Lucas doesn’t bother to open his eyes. Doesn’t move even when he hears the fire exit door unlatch with Yann’s familiar laugh following after. 

“There you are!”

“Congratulations,” Lucas says from where he’s still laying down. “You found us.”

“Shut up,” Yann grumps, leaning his board against the wall before plopping onto the floor beside him and Eliott. “Bas and Arthur are getting food, do you guys want anything?” 

Lucas only has enough energy to emit an incoherent groan, rolling over to grab his phone from where it had fallen on Eliott’s other side earlier. “Nah, we have to get going to see mama soon.” 

“Wait, Eliott’s going with you? To see her?” 

He nods, sending off a text confirming with Marie and his mom what time they want them there. “We have to bring Champ back to Marie and mama’s there with her so.” 

When Lucas turns back around, Yann’s wiggling his brows at Eliott. That combined with the giant grin splitting his face is starting to look more disturbing the longer Lucas looks at him. 

Eliott seems to share the sentiment, and he starts laughing a few seconds into their little stare off. “What?” 

“Nothing man, just glad you guys are at meet the parents level.” 

Lucas rolls his eyes, kicking at his best friend’s heel once before resting his ankle on top of Yann’s. “It’s just a casual supper thing.” 

“Uh huh.” 

“Shut your face.”

And because he’s dumb, Yann mimes putting a hand over his face, expression blank when he next uncovers it. Lucas throws a balled up thread he’d ripped off of his jeans earlier and sneaks a glance up at Eliott. They make eye contact, what with Eliott already looking down at Lucas with a large, amused smile.

“Let’s head out then?” Eliott says, then turns to address Yann, “we’ll walk with you to where Arthur and Bas went, don’t worry, can’t have you being all lonely now.” 

“Thanks, you’re so nice, Lucas would never.” Yann dodges another kick to his leg. 

“I thought I told you to shut your face?” Lucas lazily hauls himself off the floor, dusting his pants a bit before turning a confused look at Eliott when he notices him pull out a leather jacket from his backpack. “Why do you have that in there?”

Eliott eyes him like Lucas is the one acting strange. “Babe, I have to look good when we get there, first impressions are important.” 

Lucas can feel his cheeks heating up. He can also practically feel Yann’s googly eyes at the back of his head and the internal screeching reverberating through their shared braincell so he’s resolutely not looking back in that direction. At least Arthur and Basile aren’t present. 

He lets the nickname slip, though, choosing to unwind the scarf around him to wrap Eliott up in it instead. If his boyfriend insists on being unreasonable then Lucas would just have to take care of the missed details. 

The missed detail here being the fact that it’s way too fucking cold for a leather jacket, hot as it may look on Eliott. 

“Mama’s not gonna care if you look like a Calvin Klein model, Eliott.” Oh yes she will. Lucas would probably have to endure a few hours of brow raising and elbow nudging. But Eliott doesn’t need to know that. “But if you’re putting that on then you’re also wearing this scarf and that’s final, mister.” 

Eliott snickers, tugging the scarf off his neck and throwing it around Lucas before pushing the leather jacket back inside his backpack. “Okay, okay, fine, I will. And I’ll change later so it doesn’t get too cold. Happy?” 

Lucas grumpily ducks his head down into his scarf until only his narrowing eyes are visible. “Satisfactory.” 

“You know you guys act like a married couple, right?” Yann pipes up, hugging his skateboard to his chest as he leans back against the exit door.

Lucas shoves the door open and watches Yann tumble backwards with a crash. 

Lucas feels like he’s been holding his breath throughout the entire trip to Marie’s house. He’s not nervous, no, he can’t imagine his mother disliking a single thing about Eliott. But it’s not like he’s had a golden track record of significant others to introduce to his mother so he doesn’t know how these things are supposed to go. Casual as he convinces himself this whole thing is, nothing about it feels all that casual to him.

“You look like you’re about to launch yourself into outer space.” Eliott places a hand on the low of his back once they reach Marie’s front porch, thumb brushing back and forth. “I’m supposed to be the nervous one here.” 

“I’m fine,” Lucas squeaks out, highly unconvincing. At least Eliott finds it hilarious so maybe he wouldn’t be a stuttering mess. 

Marie opens the door on the second knock and immediately takes a wiggling Champ into her arms. “Come on in, boys!” She steps back to open the door wider. “Hello my little Champagne, oh I missed you too, I missed you… just leave your shoes anywhere you can find. Lorraine’s in the kitchen,” she whispers the last part with a wink towards Eliott before walking off. 

Lucas laughs a little, easing up under Marie’s presence. He waits for Eliott by the door and notices how his boyfriend’s moving slower than usual, evidently delaying the actual first meeting part of the meeting. He holds out his hand before it gets too ridiculous. 

“She’ll love you,” he says, raising his hand higher when Eliott looks up at him like a deer in the headlights. “Come on.”

And he’s right. Of course he’s right. 

His mama folds Eliott into a warm embrace the moment they’ve exchanged names, endeared as Eliott does stutter through the introductions. 

“He’s handsome,” she says to Lucas when they pass each other in the living room. And there goes the elbow nudging Lucas had predicted earlier. “Very handsome.”

“I know, mama.” He rolls his eyes, sitting on the piano bench where Champ is napping under. Eliott and Marie are deep in conversation as she shows him a photobook of her family back in Jamaica so Lucas occupies himself with the piano, quietly hitting a few keys while his eyes roam over the top for a music book. 

What he finds instead are papers with his mama and papa’s names on them. 

He snatches them off the top of the piano, skimming through the documents to try and inch out what they’re for as quickly as possible. A hand on his shoulder stops his frantic reading and Lucas looks up at his mom with eyes wide in question. 

“It’s not about the transfer if that’s what you’re thinking.” She sits on the bench beside him and flips the papers until she settles on a page with big letters jumping out from the rest. It goes without question now. 

Application (Divorce)

Divorce Order 

When Lucas remains silent, she takes the papers away from his hands and puts them back where he found them. “I think it’s time, don’t you? I brought it over for Marie to read through so…”  

Lucas still doesn’t say anything but he manages a small smile in her direction before tucking her hands in between both of his. They sit there for a bit, just looking at each other, all teary and holding hands. Lucas thinks that yeah, they really are mother and son, getting all sappy at inconvenient times of the day. 

That’s before she laughs again, clear and carefree, and untangles their hands to play a familiar tune on the piano. She glances up at Lucas with a daring smile, one eyebrow raising as if in challenge. 

Lucas bristles, sitting up properly to prove that yes, he can still give her a run for her money. He takes a deep breath, fingers landing soft on the smooth ivory, letting his hands familiarize themselves with the instrument— it’s been a long, long time since he's last played. But here, sitting beside the woman who’s patiently taught him one echoing tune at a time, there’s no doubt in Lucas’ mind that he could never forget a single piece they’ve played together. 

And it feels so good to be doing this again that it almost pushes him over the edge, almost has him straight up crying. Only almost though. 

There’s complete silence in the living room only seconds after they start, and Lucas’ skin prickles at the feeling of eyes on his back. He doesn’t let it distract him, focused on hitting the correct notes as four hands dance around the length of the piano. 

Riopy’s I love you has always been his mama’s favourite. She’d altered the tune slightly so that both her and Lucas could play it together and for him, right now, it’s never sounded better.

Later, watching Eliott enthusiastically converse with his mama about possibly joining the culinary classes she’s attending (thank god), Lucas thinks it only makes sense for Eliott to be present the moment Lucas plays that particular piece for the first time in years. 

They head out with only a few minutes to spare before the bus to Eliott’s apartment arrives. Both of their group chats are blown up with reminders that they’re all supposed to wear costumes to the party, with explicit mentions of how Eliott and Lucas are specifically not allowed to ditch the party until at least two hours into it. 

“What was that song you guys played?” Eliott asks as they settle into the back seats, huddled together for warmth. 

Lucas hides his face inside the fabric of his hood. “I don’t remember,” he says, biting his lip as he wills for the blush to die down. Maybe they should’ve played one of Chopin’s pieces instead. “I’ll look it up later.” 

Yeah. Much, much later. 

Abe had met up with them at Eliott’s so they could walk to the party together. It was apparently the only way to ensure that Eliott doesn’t cancel at the last minute. He’d complained all the way through about being left out and had even called Idris so they could ‘share their experiences as a third wheel’. 

His actions are made all the more ridiculous considering Abe is wearing a fucking banana suit to the party. 

Lucas secretly thinks that he wouldn’t have minded staying in, just him and Eliott on the couch with a movie and some snacks. 

But now he’s standing by the walls at this party, alone with the one drink he’s been nursing since the start, watching his friends jump around on the dance floor as the strobe lights cut through the dark to illuminate the wide smiles they share. 

It’s not that he’s bored. He’s just a little tired from the day he’s had and he could probably only dance as rigorously as everyone else for about five minutes before throwing the towel in. God, he’s getting old. 

Eyes searching, it doesn’t take very long for him to spot Eliott— he stands out after all. Tall and handsome even in a simple hoodie, messy head of hair bobbing along to the bass of the music. Eliott’s been swept into conversation by many, many people all night long and of course his boyfriend’s too sweet to snub them all. It seems like everyone’s constantly vying for his attention, just like that first party they’d attended together, and Lucas is still a little baffled witnessing it. He’s very quickly understanding why Eliott isn’t too fond of attending parties if this is how they always go for him. 

A loud whoop from the dance floor steals his attention and Lucas laughs at the sight of Basile flailing around in a dance battle against Abe of all people. It’s really not a good look to lose a dance battle against a walking banana. But Abe’s unfortunately just that good. 

Imane and Alexia are on the floor, collapsed in laughter. Beside them, Manon and Adam start clapping and cheering when Yann jumps to Basile’s rescue, flailing into a more acceptable dance routine that has Abe jokingly backing off, pulling Idris and Omar into the center of the circle for their turn at the dance off. Daphne is making wide eyes at Emir, poking him in the ribs hard enough to have him flinching closer to where Imane is slowly regaining her wits. Emma is at the bar struggling to balance a tray of drinks in her hands. He certainly hopes those are for the whole group rather than for her alone. 

Lucas hides what he knows must be another dumb smile on his face, watching his friends and Eliott’s friends interact like they’ve always been a huge messy group of idiots rather than only having met each other recently. Never did he allow himself to imagine that his and Eliott’s lives would merge in this way.

“What’s a beautiful guy like you doing here all alone?” Eliott whispers in his ear and Lucas is so startled he almost spills his drink on the both of them. 

But he recovers quickly, snorting at Eliott’s words. “I’m not alone, actually.” 

“Oh. No?” Eliott’s leaning on the wall beside him now, and Lucas thinks he’s the beautiful one here, so beautiful even the lights are shy as they strike flitting colours over his hair, his cheeks, his radiant eyes, his smiling lips.

“Mhm, I have boyfriend but he keeps ditching me for other people. You’ve probably seen him around.”

“Sounds like a terrible boyfriend,” Eliott says, “I suggest you break up with him and run away with me.” 

“What, right now?” Lucas plays along, discarding his drink on the first steady surface he finds. “I don’t know, he’s kinda cute.” 

“I’m cuter.”

Lucas laughs at that, hands anchoring themselves on Eliott’s shoulder as he stands on the tips of his toes. “I can’t see you clearly.” 

Eliott leans down to meet him halfway, catching his lips in a sweet kiss. Literally. He tastes like Fruitopia and somehow, that’s a funny enough thought to have Lucas melting into a heap of giggles. He feels Eliott’s amused huff against his hair before Lucas is being dragged back up, breath catching into a deeper kiss, and all thoughts of fruity drinks are quickly gone from his mind.

Warm hands insistently pull him off the wall and into Eliott’s chest, but it isn’t a hard feat anyway— it’s not like Lucas has any plans to fight against it. He brings his own hands up, sliding from shoulder to neck to the back of Eliott’s head where clumsy fingers tangle themselves into the soft strands they find there. He pulls away soon after, heartbeat off rhythm and lungs begging. His next inhale is an intoxicating mix of cologne and alcohol and Eliott. 

“Can you see me now?” 

Lucas smiles, hands moving to rest on either side of Eliott’s cheeks. Even in the dark, he’s the most precious thing Lucas has ever seen. “I see you.” 

And maybe, just maybe, Lucas number 1 did alright in this universe after all. 

#skam france #elu fic #fictag #elu insta au #2 hours late on the last chapter #how on brand #ok technically there's one more chapter for the epilogue so #!!! #here's some happiness for y'all #better bet in still rereading this as I post

[thdorkmagnet]

Light of the Sun and Stars Chapter 28: Official

Summary: His whole life Marco Diaz has been raised by monsters, living under the cruel rule of their leader, Toffee. But one day Marco escapes into Mewni where he meets a magical princess and Mewman like himself, who begins teaching him all about her world. Together they will learn about life, love, and the lights within each of them, as they change their world forever.

Chapter Synopsis: Star’s peace commission is finally up and ready to go. Now it’s time for their first official meeting to begin!

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Index

Disclaimer: Star vs and all its characters are owned by Daron Nefcy and Disney. All rights go to them.

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“Sparkle Glitter Bomb Expand!” Star shouted, holding her wand out at her target. There was a burst of light and a second later the castle had a new addition, a large meeting room, big enough to fit the group of young visiting monarchs. Star smiled proudly at what she had made, no longer would she have to sit in an uncomfortable, stuffy board room, now they had nothing but space while they made plans and resolved issues in the divided Mewni. She felt a hand on her shoulder and turned to see Jackie admiring the new room. “Wow, Star it looks great!” she praised pleasantly.

“Yeah, I think it will work,” Star said humbly, though inside she was shining and it wasn't just from the compliment. This was the moment they had all been waiting for, after nearly a month and a half of work, the Monster Mewman Peace Commission was finally up and running. The fellow members were already on the way and in less than an hour they would be ready to begin. Star could feel the butterflies in her tummy, an excited, nervous buzz filling her being as she was both ready to begin but slightly scared at the same time. It was a strange feeling to be sure, but one she was able to push past. After all it was far too late to get cold feet now, she had to go forward with this, she had no choice, for the sake of her people she had to make this work.

Okay, that was doing seriously little to calm her down she realized, letting out a mental sigh. She turned to her skater friend, who looked oddly chill about everything and Star felt a twinge of jealousy. How did she do it? How was it that Jackie never seemed fazed by stuff like this? How could she keep her head under so much pressure and when importance was being thrust on her like this? She wished she could do the same, maintain her calm under the most trying of circumstances. Or at least hide it well enough that no one noticed when she was. Star most of the time was unable to pull that off, something in her stance, posture, or expressions giving her away.

And it seemed she was right to assume she was less successful in disguising her true feelings as Jackie suddenly asked, “Nervous?”

Star nodded, knowing there was no point in denying it. “Maybe a little,” she said.

Jackie gave her shoulder a quick, reassuring pat. “Relax, your gonna do great,” the skater said confidently and Star wished she could be as sure of that fact as her friend was.

“Well I'd do better if I didn't have to worry about all of Mewni watching,” Star pointed out, grimacing at the seeing eye cam hovering nearby, preparing to begin recording. She knew letting their first meeting be filmed would only help beneficent in reassuring the Mewmans and Monsters further by showing them just how committed they truly were to the task, but that didn't mean it eased Star's nerves in the slightest, feeling the pressure falling solely on her shoulders.

“Wanna know what I do when I'm stressed out?” Jackie asked and Star nodded eagerly.

“Yes please,” Star practically begged, listening intently to whatever advice the level-headed skater had in mind.

“Just clear your mind and think about something that makes you happy,” Jackie explained. “For me that's skateboarding, I just picture myself riding on my board and pretty soon, I'm not worrying about anything else.”

Star let out a sigh. “You make it sound so easy,” the blond royal replied and Jackie grinned.

“Just trust me, Star, it works,” Jackie told her, before walking off and Star thought that over for a moment. Something that makes me happy. She closed her eyes and the image of a smiling brown-haired boy came into her mind. He looked so happy and carefree as he grinned widely at her, his chocolate orbs shining as he caught her gaze, looking content just to be in her presence. The light from the setting sun highlighted his tanned skin perfectly, making him a sight to behold and his small mole and glowing cheek marks made him too cute for words. Star smiled widely, her cheeks blushing slightly, as she heard his voice softly say her name. “Star...”

But then she heard it again, much louder and more feminine, not to mention more commanding than she was used to hearing from him, “Star?” Wait, that wasn't how Marco sounded? His voice was much cuter and if she didn't know any better she would swear that sounded more like...

“Star!” Moon practically shouted in her daughter's ear, trying to gain her attention from whatever thoughts were clearly consuming her mind. Star screamed and pulled back, staring puzzled into her mother's eyes, panting slightly from the scare. “Mom!” she squeaked against her will, though if she was chocked up from the scare or whatever she was thinking about, Moon didn't know.

“I just came to see how everything was going,” the royal explained, her queenly nature never wavering for an instant. She looked out at the meeting room her daughter had made, studying it closely. She had been hesitant when her daughter had first pitched the idea, not sure if allowing new rooms to be slapped willy-nilly into the foundation was a good call, but she had to admit it looked quite beautiful now that it was finished. It fit well with the decor of the castle, her daughter copying it exactly, but still putting in her own touches, carvings of narwhals and unicorns etched into the foundation and the large meeting table formed into the shape of a star. “And it seems you have everything under control,” she commented, satisfied.

But as she looked down at her daughter the smile left and the eyebrow raising once more, as she asked, “What were you thinking about?”

“Nothing!” Star blurted out much too quickly and it didn't take a genius for Moon to deduce what (or rather who) her lovestruck daughter had been thinking about, the blush on her cheeks enough to give her away.

“Well, I just came to wish you luck and that your father and I will be rooting for you,” Moon said and Star finally smiled back, giving her mother a tight hug.

“Thanks mom,” Star said, the gratefulness in her tone, making Moon's heart leap. “I'm gonna make you both proud.”

“I know you will,” Moon replied, giving her a quick peck on the head, before releasing her and heading off, waving to her daughter as she went. She passed by Lily in the hallway and Moon turned to watch her go. But she continued on down the hallway after a moment of hesitation, her mind now filled and occupied with her own day of work ahead and she couldn't afford to waste brain space on anything else whatsoever.

When Lily reached her niece, she swept her up in a surprise hug, spinning her in a circle for a moment as she gushed, “Oh Star, I am so proud of you! Look at you, you little monarch! If you keep growing up this fast, pretty soon your mom and dad will be out of the job!”

Star laughed as she was spun around the room by her favorite aunt, quickly growing dizzy as she struggled to form a coherent thought. “Aunt Lily, put me down! What if someone sees us?!” Star exclaimed around her giggles. As much fun as this was, it was pretty unbecoming of two rulers.

Finally, Lily released her merciful grip, setting her niece back down on her feet, where she swayed for a moment while her vision tried to catch up with the rest of her, the room still spinning wildly in her eyes. “Sorry I just couldn't resist!” Lily exclaimed, squeezing Star's cheeks. “I'm just so excited for you! You put a lot of work into this and I wanted to make sure you were enjoying it and not stressing over it like your mom!”

“Does mom really stress that much?” Star asked in concern and Lily gave her a sad nod.

“Unfortunately so,” Lily muttered under breath.

Star looked down thoughtfully, before meeting her aunt's eye again, asking, “So, uh, what do you think of the meeting room I made?”

Lily quickly looked into the room, her eyes taking in every sight, before she smiled and said, “It's lovely, Star. And it fits you perfectly!”

Star blushed but said nothing more as they walked into the room, Lily still admiring the scenery. “I think it's nice too, Star,” Glossaryk's voice suddenly pitched in and the two turned to see him sitting in one of the chairs eating pudding with a spoon. “Much better than that stuffy room your mother always piles us into.”

“Glossaryk?” Star questioned, shocked to already see him in the room. “How did you-” She stopped herself, knowing it was better not to ask, whatever bizarre answer he would most likely give only serving to confuse her further. “Never mind,” she muttered under her breath. But her voice rose as she did point out hesitantly, “But, um, Glossaryk, that's not your seat, that seat is reserved for Rich Pigeon.” She gestured to the name etched into the seat like all the others gathered around the desk and sure enough it read clear as day, 'Rich Pigeon' in bold, cursive writing.

“My bad I never could read cursive,” Glossaryk commented before floating across the table to a different chair, taking a large bite of pudding and splattering bits of it onto the table and floor.

“Glossaryk no, that's Jackie's seat,” Star said softly, before sighing defeatedly.

Lily put a hand on her shoulder, to calm her niece's nerves, telling her, “Deep breath, Star. You will make it through this.”

Star smiled gratefully as she took her advice and sucked in a long, slow breath into her lungs. “Now then, which seat is mine?” Lily asked looking around at the seats in puzzlement, squinting as she tried to read the delicate handwriting.

“Right there,” Star said dryly, pointing out her seat in question, before adding, “Remember? You helped me plan the place-settings.” She raised an accusing eyebrow at her aunt who looked around the room flustered. They both knew that Lily was supposed to be there to help take the burden off of the young royal, but how could she do that if she couldn't even remember something as simple as a seating chart?

“Yes well, I can't be expected to remember every single thing we planned out for the last several weeks,” she said, trying to defend herself for her lack of awareness. But her bright smile returned, reassuring her niece of her support by adding enthusiastically, “However, if you give me some direction I am sure that I can still be of help to you.”

This seemed to catch Star off-guard as she stared at her aunt blankly for a moment, before recovering with a start. “Right... ummmm-” Star began, but she couldn't think of what to tell her to do. In fact, she was having trouble thinking of anything, her mind completely empty. She began to panic, the meeting hadn't even started yet and she was already falling apart. This was never gonna work. What was she thinking? What if she...

Star's out of control thoughts ceased as she felt a hand on her shoulder, Lily giving her an encouraging look as she said,”Why don't I go check and make sure the food is ready for when our guests arrive. I'm sure they will be hungry after a long travel.”

Star was silent for a moment, before saying in a tight, nervous voice, “Yeah, yeah, go do that.” She waved her hand absentmindedly in the direction of the exit and Lily nodded before obeying, leaving the room quickly. Once the royal was gone, Star leaned against the table, letting out a long breath, her body shaking slightly. She had to get control of herself, no one could afford for her to shut down now. She was the leader of the commission for corn's sake, she needed to act like one. And as she slowly looked up, trying to steady her nerves, she saw that Glossaryk was staring at her intently with his weird diamond-shaped pupils. His eyes seemed to be trying to convey something to Star and suddenly the blond remembered the talk the two had had. She could do this, she just had to trust her instincts.

So, after taking another minute to recover, as well as picture a certain brown-haired boy again to relax her, she rose up from the table, now standing much taller, a confident smile on her face, and she could swear she saw Glossaryk grin around his bite of pudding. But before Star could comment, the door to the room busted open as their first guest and member arrived. Star smiled brightly at the sight of a familiar floating horse snout in the doorway, who quickly shouted at the top of her lungs, “What up, B-Fly!”

“Pony!” Star exclaimed, running over and throwing her arms around her in a hug. At this point, whatever hard feelings Star had harbored for her old friend were all but forgotten and it was impossible to tell from her excitement that they had ever been there in the first place. “I'm so glad you made it!”

“Well duh, course I came,” Pony scoffed, though there was no resentment in her tone. “Wouldn't be a party without me?” She flipped her mane, arrogantly and Star gave her a small smile, before pointing out with a raised finger, “Um, not really a party.”

“Well whatever you know what I mean, girl,” Pony said with a roll of her eyes. “I'm just glad to be hanging out with my bestie again!”

“Yeah me too,” Star admitted, a bit hesitant. It seemed Pony was completely disregarding the whole reason they were there in the first place, treating this historic and monumental occasion as a casual meet and greet. “But y'know, we are here to do important-”

“Yeah, yeah,” Pony quickly interrupted, flying deeper into the room. “But like, are there gonna be any refreshments or something? Cause like, I can't keep my sharp, beautiful mind working without some food in me.”

Star sighed. Well it was a start, at least. “Aunt Lily just went to go check on them, she should be back shortly.”

“Well that's good, cause I'm starving!” a new voice yelled and Star turned to see Ferguson giving her a goofy grin as he walked over, Alfonso directly behind him, looking around the room in awe.

“Hey Ferguson! Alfonso!” Star greeted the two cheerfully, wrapping the two up in a hug. It had been a while since she last gotten to see the two orphans and she couldn't hide her joy at being reunited with them again. “It's great to see you, how have you been?!”

“We've been awesome, Star!” Alfonso said, giving her a wide grin.

“Yeah, life in Pixtopia couldn't be better,” Ferguson continued. “Thanks to me, the pixies lives are better than ever since I came up with the plan to rid the kingdom of the last of the frogs that were plaguing are land.” He gave Star a bragging smile.

“Uhh, don't you mean my plan,” Alfonso said pointedly.

“Yeah, but I'm the one who implemented it,” the chubby king argued, clearly trying to hog all the glory for himself. “So I get the credit.” Alfonso just rolled his eyes in response and Star couldn't hold back a giggle. These two really never changed.

“Well I can't thank you two enough for agreeing to part of the commission!” Star exclaimed, covering her heart with her hands to emphasis her appreciation toward them. “Your really helping me out by being here.”

“No problem, Star,” Ferguson said with a casual wave of his hand. “Anything for you!”

“Yeah, besides we wouldn't even be here now without you, so really we're happy to return the favor,” Alfonso added, the two smiling goofily, but brightly, at their friend and Star couldn't help but blush.

“Awww, you guys!” she said, her voice cracking some with emotion as she swept them into another tight hug, blinking around her blurry vision for a moment. “You two are really the best!”

“Hey if anyone is being called the best, it's me!” Pony suddenly shouted and the three turned to the clearly jealous, raging unicorn head hovering above them with a stabbing glare.

“Pony,” Star began with a warning tone. “What did we talk about?”

Pony let out a long sigh, before muttering flatly, “You are allowed to have other friends besides me.” She was clearly displeased at having to admit such a thing, but Star wasn't done yet.

“And?” the blond pressed.

“And I can't get jealous about it,” she finished, her voice so low Star almost didn't hear it.

“Good,” Star said with a curt nod. Though the two had made up, her and Tom were still on probation in Star's eye until they could completely prove to her that they had changed.

Ferguson and Alfonso were both in disbelief at seeing the cocky future leader humbled in such a way, both gaping slack-jawed at the short exchange. In the past, it was their experience (as well as all the other orphans who had met her) that Pony was always too busy singing her own praises to listen to reason and now here she was admitting defeat after only a short scolding, now resorting to simply pouting and ignoring the three altogether. What the heck had happened while they were away? They were both at a loss at trying to think of what they could have missed that would lead to such a bizarre outcome. Now all either of them could wonder was what else had changed since their last visit.

“Soooo uhh, Star,” Alfonso began, recovering somewhat from his shock. “Heard you and Marco became official, that's pretty awesome.”

Star's eyes widened, caught off guard for a moment, but it quickly switched to a bright, lovestruck smile. “Yeah, it has been amazing so far,” she sighed dreamily, thinking of her adorable bestie in all his dorky glory, and her cheek marks began to thump against her will.

“Well, congrats, we were rooting for you two!” Ferguson added with a wink, Alfonso giving her two thumbs up.

Now Star was blushing, as she softly said, “Thanks.”

“So where is he,” Alfonso asked, looking around the room. “When we heard he was gonna be a member of the commission too, we were hoping we'd get a chance to congratulate him too.”

“Yeah and since you kinda hogged him all to yourself during the Blood Moon Ball, I never really got a chance.”

Star paused, having already wondered the same thing, herself. Marco should have been there by now, but for some reason he seemed to be running late. Still, she wasn't too concerned figuring there was some reason behind it, quickly telling the boys, “Oh, don't worry he's coming. He's probably just still getting ready. He'll be here soon.”

…

Marco was snoring loudly as he held Corny tightly to his chest, drooling slightly on the stuffed corncob, blissfully unaware of the world turning in the realm of his dreams. He frowned slightly in his sleep rolling over and stretching his arm across the bed, whacking a snoozing Violet in the face, who woke with a start.

“Hey, Big Brother!” Violet groaned, rubbing at her eyes.

“M'sorry,” Marco replied groggily, before letting out a sleepy yawn. “Didn't mean to eat... all the cotton candy.”

Daisy also woke from all the noisy talking, staring over at the two with droopy eyes. “What's going on?” she asked lazily.

“Marco hit me in the face and woke me up,” Violet explained in annoyance, her cheeks puffing up cutely.

“Well it was probably time to get up anyway,” Daisy said with a shrug. She then looked quickly around the boy's room before asking, “What time is it, anyways?”

“I don't know,” Violet replied, before looking down at the sleeping teen. “Big Brother, what time is it?”

Marco's eyes finally blinked open, as he stared blankly at the girl for a moment. “Huh?” he asked in confusion, his still fuzzy brain having trouble processing anything.

“What time is it?” Violet asked again in slight annoyance.

Marco looked at her, then to the window where bright sunlight was spilling through, then back to the child, before saying, “Well it's definitely morning.” Violet just gave him an irritated glare in response.

“Why don't you check your phone, Big Brother?” Daisy said helpfully and Marco yawned before climbing out of bed and stumbling over to where his phone sat charging. He rubbed absentmindedly at his eye as he checked the time on his screen, before his eyes quickly widened in distress. “9:30!” he shouted, clenching his phone in a death grip. That couldn't be right, he had made sure to set his alarm for seven. “Oh man, I'm late! The meeting is gonna start soon! How did this happen?!”

“Well your weird buzzing box was making a loud noise earlier so I turned it off,” Violet explained and Marco felt his heart clench in panic.

“You did what?!” he exclaimed.

“Your welcome,” Violet said proudly, not catching onto the boy's horrified tone. But Marco didn't waste anymore time on words as he quickly flew around his room in a mad dash, flinging clothes left and right as he searched for the perfect outfit he had set out the night before and somehow misplaced. Once he finally found what he was looking for (his very favorite red hoodie which for some reason always smelt like Star, a pair of clean and pressed black pants, and a special item he had found for the occasion) he ran into his closet, getting changed really quick, before slamming the door open, not even bothering to check himself in the mirror in his haste.

He ran past the bed shouting, “See you later, girls!”

“Good luck, Big Brother!” Daisy shouted after him, even as the door slammed closed.

…

Things began to move rather quickly for Star as the rest of the members began to pile into the room, the blond royal making sure to greet each and every one of them personally. Princess Penelope gave her a tight hug proclaiming her joy at being there, Prince Larry Kelpbottom strutted into the room with a flair that could only be associated with him bowing to the girl and Star curtseying politely back (the boy having to give a quick word to the maids to clean up the water trail he left behind him afterwards), Rich Pigeon offering one of his wings to shake in greeting and Star very tenderly and delicately obliged remembering Aunt Lily telling her how fragile the pigeon race's limbs were, Princess Jaggy Jags just blushed and walked to her seat, and her cousin Rock Johannson just walked past her without a word too distracted by his mirror phone to notice her. Lily returned, along with several servants, who began passing out snacks to the guests. Once everyone was inside and situated (most of them in the wrong seats) Star looked around and noticed two seats still empty. Tom, which wasn't surprising he was always late to everything, and Marco. She grabbed Jackie's arm pulling her out into the hall as she asked in concern, “Have you seen Marco?”

“No, why is he still not here yet?” the skater asked in concern.

Star shook her head. “It's not like him to run late, do you think he's okay?”

“I'm sure he's fine Star,” Jackie reassured her.

Just then they heard a familiar panting down the hall, followed by a shout, “Sorry I'm late!” The two turned to see a very disheveled Marco run up to them, breathing heavily from the mad dash through the castle. His hair was messy and had clearly not been brushed, his hoodie left unzipped, and his shoes were untied. But stranger than all of these were the thin pair of wire-framed glasses on his sweaty face.

“Marco, why are you wearing glasses?” Star asked, holding back a giggle.

The hooded teen adjusted them slightly on his face, as he explained, “Well I read in one of my books that wearing glasses makes you look more important and so people will take you more seriously. Do you like them?” His expression was so innocent and pure that Star just smiled and nodded.

“They look great,” she said softly. Marco looked super pleased to hear this, smiling ear to ear as Star slowly zipping up his hood and straightened out any wrinkles she could see in the soft fabric, helping make her boyfriend look presentable for his big day.

“Yeah Marco, you look very professional,” Jackie complimented him pleasantly, as she bent down and tied his shoes for him.

Marco seemed to get a burst of confidence from this as he suddenly struck a pose, pointing a finger straight out and shouting, “Now I'm Marco Diaz, MD!”

“What's the 'MD' stand for?” Jackie asked in confusion.

“'Monster Dude'!” Marco exclaimed in cheer.

Star and Jackie shared a quick look, holding back their laughter. As the blond turned back, she shook her head, gushing over her boyfriend's cuteness, as she ran a hand through his hair, combing it into a more manageable look. Marco just stood patiently and waited for her to finish, enjoying the feeling of her soft fingers brushing through his hair, sending tingles down his scalp. Once she was done, Star cupped his cheek in her hand, telling him, “There, now you're perfect.”

Jackie also nodded her approval as she stood up. “Yep, lookin' good dude.”

“Come on, Monster Dude, let's get you in there,” Star giggled as she looped his arm through hers and led him inside, Jackie following right behind.

When the doors opened, Marco was left awe-struck gazing in wonder around the beautiful room, his eyes shimmering as he took in every single thing. But while he was busy gawking Star cleared her throat, gaining the attention of the room, before she said in a strong, regal voice, “Attention everyone! This is Marco, our representative for the Monsters. Say hi Marco.”

Marco suddenly was flung back into reality as he realized the attention was now solely on him and he quickly took in the quizzical, judging faces of the other members. His heart rate spiked, his old shy habits resurfacing as he felt a sudden urge to run and hide. But he swallowed it down as he plastered a nervous smile on his face, saying in the most confident voice he could muster, “U-Uh, hi. It's nice to meet you all.” He gave a tiny wave, which none of them seemed to return and his arm quickly snapped back to his side.

“So your Star's boyfriend, right?” Princess Penelope asked, her voice warm and inviting and it helped relax him some. “The one who was raised by Monsters.”

“Yeah that's right,” Marco said with a nod.

“Cool,” Rock muttered, his eyes still on his phone screen as his fingers tapped away.

“Well, it is an honor to meet you at last,” Rich Pigeon said heartily, rising from his seat and bowing low with his fake, mechanical legs.

“N-No, the honor is all mine,” Marco said, returning the bow. When he rose back up, he noticed that the others had simply gone back to talking amongst themselves, seemingly not paying any more mind to the hooded teen, even Rich Pigeon just taking his seat once more. Marco breathed a sigh of relief, feeling that his introduction had actually gone quite well, at least none of them seemed to be giving him any harsh looks or anything... he felt basically accepted. He turned to his girlfriend who gave him an encouraging smile, whispering into his ear, “Your doing great.”

Marco felt a shudder down his spine as he felt her warm breath tickle his skin and he gave her a quick hug. “Thanks, Star,” he said, his voice much stronger and more confident now. He quickly looked around at the few empty chairs, unsure which was supposed to be his and suddenly concerned about messing up and sitting in the wrong one. He had to try and make the best impression on his fellow members and embarrassing himself by taking someone else's seat would be a bad way to go. He gave Star a lost look, asking quietly, “Um, which seat is mine?”

Star looked over at the chair Pony was occupying, the unicorn head seemingly not aware of Marco's name delicately carved into the frame above her, and she sighed, telling him in a strained tone, “You can just sit wherever you want.” What was the point anyways, not a single member had followed her seating chart, just sitting wherever they wished. In fact, Marco was the only one (besides her aunt) who had even asked where she wanted them to sit. Could literally no one in the entire stinking dimension besides her read cursive?!  So much for the hours of work I put into that, Star thought begrudgingly. That's the last time I get fancy with my naming system.

“Oh, okay,” Marco said, before frowning and looking at each seat thoughtfully, trying to decide which would be the best one to choose. He did notice that, for whatever reason, there were names carved into the chairs and he looked longingly at the chair that bore his name, mostly because it was right next to Star's, but unfortunately Pony was sitting there so that was out of the question. That left only three other options excluding Star's and he didn't know which one to pick.

“Hey Marco!” a familiar voice yelled and he quickly spotted Ferguson waving at him, a goofy smile on his face, Alfonso grinning next to him. “Come on, we saved you a seat!” He patted the empty chair in anticipation and Marco quickly raced over and eagerly took his place next to his old friend.

“Ferguson! Alfonso! I didn't know you guys were gonna be here!” Marco shouted happily. It had been forever since he had seen the two, but despite this his fondness for the two was still as strong as when they first met.

“Sure we were,” Ferguson said proudly. “In fact, Star asked me personally to come and join.”

“I think she did that for everyone, Ferg,” Alfonso pointed out. “That doesn't make you special.”

The chubby king scowled at his friend, saying through gritted teeth, “Shut it, Al, or you'll be advising me for the next few weeks in the dungeon.”

“We don't have a dungeon,” Alfonso deadpanned.

“Fine, whatever, then the pixie mines,” Ferguson grumbled, crossing his arms.

Marco laughed out loud at the his friend's pouting face. He had almost forgotten how much fun the two were. He had barely even had a chance to hang out with them before, so it was nice that he was finally able to now.

Jackie found her seat, too, next to Marco and Star looked around at the table, her thoughts now on the final remaining guest. She quickly checked the time on a nearby clock and felt her nerves spike with worry. They were already behind schedule and if they didn't get going soon, it could be disastrous. One of the requirements the Magic High Commission had given her to follow was a very tight business schedule and she couldn't fail this task before it even began, that would just look inexperienced and unprofessional on her part. If the boy didn't get here soon, she would have to start without him. “Tom, where are you?” she muttered under her breath and a second later the door behind her flew open in a burst of flames. She turned to see Tom enter, wearing a pair of sunglasses that covered all three of his eyes, a cocky smile on his face as he strutted into the room, looking quite proud of his grand entrance.

He walked up to her, shooting her a smile, as he said, “Hey there, Starship.”

“Sunglasses indoors, Tom. Really classy,” Star said, her hands on her hips as she practically glared at him.

The boy took them off and gave her a slightly guilty frown, seeing the true nature of her irritation. “Sorry, I know I'm a little late,” he began, but Star cut him off.

“No, no, it's fine,” she said, giving him an apologetic look. “I'm just stressed is all.” The blond gave him a pleasant smile. “I'm glad you're here.”

Tom nodded sympathetically. “Don't worry, your gonna be great,” he said, his tone surprisingly soothing. “Just go knock em dead.”

“Thanks,” Star said, letting out another deep breath. She made her way to the front, Tom taking the only available seat left, while she found her own. Her chair (which looked more like a throne sitting higher than the others and much larger) was in the shape of a crown, a pair of butterfly wings carved into the sides and she had it positioned at the very top-point of the five-pointed star, the head of the table. She took her seat and felt a burst of pride and energy just sitting there. She felt like a real ruler, a true queen, and it filled her heart up with courage.

Marco gave a quick glance over to Tom, saying in a semi-quiet tone, “Hey, Tom.”

“Sup, Marco,” he said, shooting the boy a smile, their quickly growing friendship still as strong as before.

But the moment didn't last long as Star took control of the situation, standing up from her seat and clearing her throat to gain everyone's attention onto her. The room went silent, not a sound could be heard as the group of young royal's all waited for their leader to begin. Star broke eye contact with the group to nod at one of the servant's, who returned the gesture and hit a button on the seeing-eye cam to begin filming the meeting.

Star sucked in a deep breath and began, managing to sound more authoritative and in-control than she felt. “Welcome everyone and thank you all for being here today! It is with great honor that I officially announce that the first ever meeting of the Monster-Mewman Peace Commission has now begun.” She took her wand, transforming it into a purple gravel and hit it against the table, for emphasis. She leaned against the table, a bright smile on her face as she looked between each and every member.

Pony floated above her chair her relaxed posture hiding her true purpose to try and gain attention from her fellow members. Glossaryk was simply giving her a blank look, licking the final remnants of pudding off his spoon, Princess Jaggs watching from next to him in disgust. Next to her, Tom sat with his arms folded in front of his chest, the nervous Jaggs casting him a longing, loving look every so often, Star noticed. Kelpbottom and Rich Pigeon were watching Star intensely, their chivalrous and well-mannered sides making them extra obedient and focused. Penelope was smiling at her, though she looked slightly uncomfortable to be there, shifting in her seat every so often and picking a seat near the far-end of the table so she wouldn't be easily noticed, clearly self-conscious of the giant spider bite on the side of her head. Then there was Rock who already looked bored to be there, his eyes on his lap where Star had zero doubt that he was playing on his phone from beneath the table. He had been her last choice to be chosen to be there, but Aunt Lily had been insistent that someone from her father's family line be present and Rock had been the best bet being so close to age as everyone else. And for all his faults he still seemed the mostly likely to join, the Johannsen's proving to be the most unwilling for change, their hatred for the Monsters more apparent than any other kingdom in Mewni. Lily sat next to him, giving her niece an encouraging grin that warmed Star up to see. Last but not least was Jackie, Marco, Ferguson, and Alfonso who were also sending her uplifting looks, trying to motivate her to keep going, while silently reminding her that she wasn't alone and they were there for her.

And it was because of this Star was able to swallow the last bit of doubt left and keep going in a strong, confident tone as she recited the speech she knew by heart. “So, you all already know why your here, Mewni is in a really bad place right now. Ever since the war ended things in Mewni have been...” she paused wanting to make sure her choice of phrasing was correct for the sensitive subject. “...less than wanted. The Mewmans feel unsafe and the Monsters are afraid that their rights are being ignored and nobody knows what to do to fix it.” Her worried expression switched to a smile, as she continued. “But that's where you all come in. Together we can make things right, we can give Mewni peace and comfort so they don't have to fear one another and start building a better future for everyone. You are all essentially the future of Mewni afterall.” She did a quick gaze around the table as she spoke. “The future leaders of Mewni's kingdoms...” She gazed at each young royal's face. “...as well as our two closest allies.” Her eyes then switched to Jackie and Ferguson. But she couldn't stop herself from staring a bit too long at another face at the table, who's bright brown eyes were shimmering with adorable affection. “Not to mention the one who made this all possible in the first place.” Marco's cheeks lit up red and Star felt her heart swell, she would never get tired of that.

“Alone there is little we can do, but united I have no doubt we can make out beautiful world more mighty than ever!” Star propelled her fist up into the air and many others followed, letting out a hearty cheer.

With that out of the way and her members properly motivated, Star took her seat again and got right down to business. “But speech's aside, words alone aren't going to be enough to fix Mewni, we need to take some real action to make a big difference and I have made sure that we have full power and right to do whatever is necessary to turn our home around.” She folded her hands on the table in a dignified, professional manner as she gave another quick glance around the room. “So, first off, I wanted to ask all of you what problems you've noticed regarding the relationship with Monsters and think need fixing.”

Marco was surprisingly the first to stand, beating all the others in their rush to be noticed, raising his hand in the air as he waited to be able to speak. Star gave him a small nod and he sucked in a deep breath before saying, “The Monsters don't have the same right's Mewmans have and because of that they are considered separate from everyone else.”

“That is an excellent point Marco,” Star praised and he grinned from ear to ear as he sat back down, looking proud of himself for helping. “That will have to be one of the first things we do. Anyone else?”

“Yeah, can we get more snacks in here because I've still got the munchies bad,” Pony said and Star shot her a glare that stilled anymore random outbursts.

“Uh, actually I just remembered I'm trying to watch my figure anyways, so I'm good for now,” the horse head quickly corrected herself, still trying to go out of her way to stay on Star's good side.

“The Monsters keep attacking my villages,” Rock suddenly spoke up out of nowhere, seeming way more invested than Star had been expecting. “If they don't stop soon, my family might just end up going to war with them all over again.”

“All do respect,” Lily suddenly chimed in. “But your family line is well-known for being more direct and out-spoken than the rest of us, are you sure that is not playing a factor in these attacks?”

“Are you implying that the Johannsen's are to blame?” Rock asked angrily.

“Not at all, the attacks are simply a disagreement between two hard-headed, stubborn people, be that Monster or Mewman, but the result could be catastrophic if not stopped,” Lily continued, keeping her tone calm and level.

“So what do you think would be the best coarse of action, Aunt Lily,” Star asked.

“I think we should try and help them find common ground, a party or get together of sorts to help them see their similarities so they can accept each others differences.”

Rock scoffed. “Yeah good luck with that,” the young barbarian muttered with a roll of his eyes.

Star let out a sigh. “Well, we will have to try something in the future to help smooth things over with the Johansens, but for now I think it would be best if the Monsters stayed away from that territory until something can be done.”

Everyone nodded or muttered their agreement the plan, Star giving her cousin a long look, asking, “Is that something you think you can agree to?”

“Yeah, sure, whatever,” Rock muttered, his eyes dropping back to his lap and the unseen phone screen that rested there. Well, it was nice while it lasted, Star thought to herself, her cousin's sporadic interest gone as quickly as it had come.

“Um well,” Penelope suddenly spoke up, her voice low and unsure. “I don't know if this counts or not, but the spiders in my home have been more aggressive than normal and we were hoping maybe this commission could do something to help out with that.”

“Uhhh, I don't think spiders count as Monsters, so I'm not sure we can do anything about that,” Star hesitantly said and Penelope’s face fell.

“Oh, okay, that's fine,” she said in clear disappointment.

“What classifies as a Monster anyways, because honestly I don't appreciate people saying that's what my people are all the time, we're actually quite ,” Tom grumbled in annoyance.

“I as well have had that very same problem,” Rich Pigeon spoke up.

Star thought about that. “That is a good point, we should probably clarify the difference between Monsters, demons and... talking pigeons.”

“Actually I am the only one in my race who can currently speak,” Rich Pigeon explained.

“Well, there you go then,” Star said. “Monsters can speak but pigeon folk can't.”

“But some Monsters can't speak either,” Jackie reminded Star. “Or at least can't speak English or Mewnish.”

“Oh yeah,” Star muttered, rubbing her chin. “That is true. I'm not sure what the difference is.”

“Most Monsters learn to speak the languages we do when they are young so that everyone can understand them, but some have their own languages that they speak instead,” Marco clarified and there was a long shocked pause as everyone just stared at him for a moment. The boy felt weird from all the gawking as he added a bit shyly, “That's what Buff Frog told me at least.”

“Well that makes sense, I guess,” Star took back over, hoping to diverge some of the attention away from her blushing boyfriend. “There isn't really anything that defines the difference between them, it seems Monsters can be classified as anything that it isn't Mewman.”

“Well that's confusing,” Pony snapped.

“Yeah it is pretty strange,” Star admitted. “But hey, that's the whole point of this, right? To see just how silly all of this has been, labeling some non-Mewmans as Monsters and others as something else.”

“Sooo, does that make me a Monster, then?” Larry Kelpbottom asked.

“I'm not sure,” Star said, still feeling confused. But she shook her head and changed the subject before they could get anymore off track, “But that's a discussion for another day. For now, our first meeting should be focusing on the most major issues and resolving thoughs so that we don't have to worry about having another war on her hands.”

“Well I think one of the major issues is that Mewmans think it is rather unfair that none of the Monsters were ever properly punished for what they did after all of those years,” Rich Pigeon suddenly spoke up. “I mean so many lives were lost because of them and yet all of them were simply let off the hook for such treason.”

Marco opened his mouth to argue, but was quickly interrupted by Pony. “Well yeah that's because B-fly needed them on her side so she forgave them without a second thought.”

Star felt her cheeks flush. “That's not really what happened, actually,” the blond tried to clarify, but the other members were too absorbed in their own conversations.

“Yes but that still doesn't change the fact that a lot of people died,” Glossaryk said out of nowhere.

“That's not-” Marco started to say, only to be interrupted again.

“Well the Monsters were just following orders, right?” Penelope said. “So, it wasn't entirely their fault.”

“It wasn't there fault, they were being used by Toffee,” Jackie spoke up. “He tricked them all into following him blindly into the war, from what I've seen none of them wanted to do it.”

“That is true, but now some of them still think that the lizard was right,” Kelpbottom said. “I've heard the whisperings from Monsters on shore.”

“But it isn't-” Marco tried again.

“That's only because the Mewmans haven't done anything to prove to them that Toffee wasn't right,” Jaggs said.

“Which is what this commission is here to do,” Star said, gaining control back. “So the question is, what can we do to reassure the Monsters that we are on their side?”

Now not a single voice spoke up and Marco saw his chance. “We should-”

“We should give each individual Monster a card telling them that their forgiven,” Rock suggested a pleased smile on his lips for the great idea.

Star tried not to cringe, as she said hesitantly, “Maybe something more... direct.”

“We could let the Monsters live wherever-”

“Oh, oh,” Penelope exclaimed. “We could give the Monsters more land to live on instead of the small corner of Mewni we've been giving them!”

“That's an excellent idea, Penelope!” Star said cheerfully and Marco deflated some in his chair as the members continued to suggest ideas with varying degrees of success. Every time he would try and pitch an idea, it would be quickly covered up by a barge of voices from his fellow members, effectively cutting him off and making him feel worse than ever. No one was listening to him, Star too busy keeping order amongst her members to notice his disappointed state. He was supposed to be helping, but so far he had contributed virtually nothing.

“Don't take it too hard, man,” Ferguson suddenly said to him and Marco turned to him in shock. “Their just really invested in what their doing to notice people like us.”

Now Marco was really confused. “What do you mean 'people like us'?”

“Y'know the ones who aren't really supposed to be here,” Ferguson explained, sounding super nonchalant over the bold declaration.

Marco's mouth dropped open. Is that really what Ferguson thought? That them being there was so non-important that they weren't even expected to contribute anything. “What, of course we are.”

“Look, I'm just staying that we both know we're only here because Star wanted to see us.”

Marco again jumped on the defensive, proclaiming, “That's not true. Star spent weeks planning all of this out.” He didn't want his girlfriend's hard work to be undermined like that, feeling a need to stick up for her. “She put a lot of time and care into choosing each member.”

“And how long was it before she chose you?” Ferguson asked.

Marco froze with a start. “Well... the first day, but-”

“Look Marco, you shouldn't take it so hard,” the chubby king continued. “Everyone knows that you and Star are dating, so of course she would pick you for such an important position. My wife does the same thing for me all the time, heck, she'll let me do whatever I want without thinking about it. You got to learn to enjoy it and not worry about what everyone else thinks.”

Marco hesitated before asking in a worried tone, “What... does everyone else think?”

“That Star only asked you to join because your her boyfriend,” Ferguson said and Marco felt his blood run cold.

Was that really what people thought about him? That he didn't really deserve or earn his position at all? That the only reason he was there in the first place... was because Star had feelings for him? Looking at it that way, it felt like a slap in the face to his parents' vision, two people who had given up their lives to give him a chance to carry on in their place. He had hoped that being part of Star's commission would allow him to begin repaying all the people he owed his new life to, but how could he do that when the others didn't take him seriously? Was he just a joke in their eyes? Unfit to be sitting in this chair, amongst so many future leaders and monarchs. Was he just... useless.

Toffee's old hurtful words hung in his heavy head, feeling like a stab to his brain and sending waves of pain to his guts. That's how Toffee always saw him, only using him for his own benefit. He had hoped that things were different now, that through his hard work he could help to bring change, but it seemed that was going to be harder than he intended. Before, he had thought the greatest challenge he would have to face was getting the Monsters to see the right way, but now there was a knew problem. How could he get others to believe in him or listen to him if they had already dismissed him as nothing, because they didn't think he belonged there?

If he belonged there at all, so far he didn't seem all that needed as the royals continued to discuss topic after topic without his help, occasionally shooting him a respectful but empty smile and he began to question his purpose there. He had thought he was useful to Star's commission but the more he thought about it the more he began to realize that he didn't really contribute anything of value other than knowing Star or being raised by Monsters. And were either of these things really enough to warrant him being a member of an esteemed commission like this. Sure he had helped to bring peace but that didn't guarantee he could help to uphold it.

Suddenly, Higgs's old rant entered into his head, unwelcome in his already fragile state of mind, but no matter what Marco did he couldn't get rid of it. He could still see her look of disgust as she spat out the insult at him, her green eyes so full of fury Marco was afraid she would lit him on fire with her mind or something. And even now, her word's of anger still hurt despite them making up. Mostly because he knew they held a dark layer of truth to them. Which was why as they continued to ring through his head over and over again during the rest of the meeting, repeating itself as if on loop almost as if it was demanding an answer, it only made him feel lower and more self-conscious as he began to fear those dreaded words. What have you done to deserve any of the great things you've gotten.

And the scary things was... he still didn't know.

…

“Shhhh, here he comes,” came a whispered voice from the dark interior of Buff Frog's country home.

“Oh boy, he's gonna be so surprised,” a giddy voice giggled in glee.

“Ow, your standing on my foot!” came a sudden, loud yell, followed by more (almost as noisy) shushing, this time a large group of people it sounded like joining in.

“Quiet, idiot, your gonna give us away!” someone snapped.

“But he was standing on my sensitive bear paw,” the voice from before whined in defense of himself.

“Well your gonna lose your bear paw if you don't shut up!” the other hissed.

But the sound of a doorknob being turned drew everyone's attention to the front door, as they all let out a collective gasp of anticipation. The door opened and a very disheartened Marco walked inside, his eyes lighting up some with confusion as he saw the dark, seemingly empty house before him. “Guys?”

“Surprise!” every Monster shouted as they jumped up out of nowhere, the lights flicking on, startling Marco to no end as he let out a high-pitched scream and jumped a full foot back, slamming into the front door and nearly sending him sprawling to the floor. He gasped and panted in shock, a hand to his racing heart as he looked at the members of his Monster family, save for Buff Frog, all of them giving him goofy, loving smiles. A sign behind clearly read, ' Congratulations, it's a boy!' but had been hastily scratched out with red ink and now said, 'Congratulations, Marco on your new job!'

“Congratulations on your first day as an official Monster representative, Marco!” Lobster Claws cheered, pumping his claws into the air excitedly.

“We are so proud of you!” Beard Deer exclaimed as well, ruffling the boy's hair a little as he gave him a wide grin.

But to their surprise, the boy merely gave them all a tight smile, his normally enthusiastic energy nonexistent as he just stared at the floor blankly. “Thanks guys,” he said numbly, his voice cracking slightly as if he was fighting back whatever negative emotion was obviously plaguing him. The Monsters had all frozen in place, not sure what to do, and the boy looked over the petrified room for a second before asking in a monotone drone, “Where's Buff Frog?”

Was that what this was about? Beard Deer wondered. Was he upset that his dad wasn't there to greet him? He hoped that was all it was, concern for the child filling his chest and beginning to squeeze his insides.

“H-He had business in the eastern corner of Mewni,” Bearicorn said hesitantly, watching the boy's every move for any shift in his emotional state. And seeing his face somehow fall even more and him muttering a very quiet, “Oh,” the bear Monster quickly added, “Buuuttt he should be back soon.” I hope, he added in his head, as were the rest of the Monsters. As much as they loved Marco, they had virtually zero parental instincts and  were far from equipped to handle these kind of situations. Normally their leader or Star would comfort Marco when he was in such a fragile emotional state, but since neither were there that task now fell onto the rest of them and they were at a collective loss of how to help the boy.

“That's fine,” Marco whispered, his arms wrapping around his frame as if hugging himself.

“What's wrong, Marco?” Beard Deer asked, unable to take the boy's sorrowful state any longer without finding out the cause for it.

“Did something happen?” Lobster Claws pressed in a very worried tone. They had no idea what had gone on during the meeting, the footage not planned to be released until that evening.

“Are we all going to jail?” Bearicorn asked.

“Was the meeting that bad?” Boo Fly added.

And that seemed to set the teen off as he shouted, “No, everything went great, that's the whole problem!” The entire group of Monsters jumped at the sudden outburst, reeling back with shock and confusion over the boy's clear distress.

“W-What?” Beard Deer asked not understanding what the boy meant as they all just continued to stare.

Marco's eyes flooded with unshed tears and he then ran past the Monster and up the stairs toward his room. “Marco, where are you going?!” Spike Balls shouted after him in concern.

“I-I just want to be alone right now!” Marco yelled back, his voice hitching as a sob escaped his lips. There was the loud resounding sound of a door slamming shut, which caused the group of Monster's to jump once more as they stared helplessly at the staircase. The room grew unbearably silent for a few moments, an awkward atmosphere that left the Monster's shifting hesitantly on their feet.

“What was that about?” Lobster Claws finally asked, looking around at the other Monsters in hopes they had some kind of idea what was wrong with the boy but they clearly didn't.

“Don't know,” Beard Deer said, his voice a quiet mutter. He didn't know what to make of the situation, that apparently Marco was upset... that everything was okay. It didn't make any sense. He could feel the others' stare on him, since he was the leader when Buff Frog was gone that meant he was the one to make the call on what to do, but for once he didn't have an answer. “I'll... go talk to him,” he said softly, walking slowly up the stairs, still feeling about a dozen sets of eyes following his every move as he made his way to Marco's door.

He held a claw up, preparing to knock but hesitated for a second or two, sucking in a breath before willing his claw forward his knuckles wrapping on the firm wood. “Marco?”

“I don't want to talk right now!” came the immediate reply, his tear-soaked voice tugging at Beard Deer's heartstrings. He looked over to see the rest of the Monsters gathered on the staircase with the same sorrowful expression he had on.

“Marco, come on I'm sure whatever is wrong isn't that bad,” Beard Deer tried weakly. He really didn't know what he was doing. A sudden fear ran through him though as he asked nervously, “This isn't about us, right?”

“Did we do something wrong?” Lobster Claws asked.

There was a distinct sniff from the other side of the door, before the boy's miserable voice squeaked out, “No, you guys are fine.”

The Monsters collectively released a sigh of relief, thankful they hadn't unintentionally hurt Marco's feelings. “Well then what is it?” Beard Deer asked and the boy didn't answer. “Marco, please come out so that we can talk this out,” the deer Monster pressed, hoping he wasn't pushing the boy too far. When he still got no answer he decided to try a different tactic, saying, “Do you want us to call Star so you can talk to her instead?”

“I-I'm s-sorry, but I d-don't w-want to s-see anyone right n-now,” Marco replied, chocking on sobs every other word.

Beard Deer gave his fellow Monsters a grimace, which the others returned, and he shrugged letting them know that he was now out of ideas. But it seemed none of the others had any clue either so he just let out a sigh, hesitantly saying, “Okay then, Marco. If you change your mind, we'll be waiting downstairs.” There was no reply at all, the sealed-off room completely silent as the Monsters made their way downstairs. They all sat around for several minutes, casting anxious glances up at the second story, worry for their youngest filling all of them with dread and uncertainty.

Beard Deer, after few moments of uncomfortable contemplation, finally reached into his pocket and pulled out his mirror phone and telling it, “Call Buff Frog.”

“Calling Buff Frog,” the computer voice complied, the phone ringing and ringing as the Monster's waited with held breath for their boss to answer and come to their rescue. Finally they heard a familiar accent saying, “Hello, this is Yvgeny Bulgolyubov.”

“Oh thank corn, boss!” Beard Deer exclaimed in relief. “Marco is-”

“Cannot come to phone right now,” the voicemail continued. “Please leave message after annoying beeping sound.” The beep sounded and for a few seconds Beard Deer just stood perfectly rigid, his eyes wide and unblinking and his body as stiff as a board to the point the others began to fear for his safety.

“Uh, Beard Deer, you okay?” Lobster Claws asked, but his answer was completely unexpected as the deer Monster suddenly released a murderous growl and slammed the phone against the wall smashing it into a thousand pieces, the two headed Monster having to duck to avoid getting hit. “Hey, that was uncalled for,” one of the head's whined, while the other just nodded in agreement, crossing their arms in annoyance.

“No, I'm not okay!” Beard Deer screamed. “Marco is hiding in his room and won't talk to us or tell us why! How do you think I'm doing, idiot?!”

“Geez, sorry,” Lobster Claws quickly muttered, holding his claws up in surrender while the second-in-command just panted and growled in growing frustration.

“So what should we do for now, until Buff Frog gets back?” Spike Balls asked.

“Yeah we should do something right, we can't just leave Marco like that,” Bearicorn said, determined to help the young one cheer up.

“Marco zzzaid he didn't want to be dizzturbed,” Boo Fly pointed out. “We zzhould rezzpect hizz wizzhez.”

The others all hung their head at that, not sure how to argue with that causing them to hate it all the more. “Okay, I guess if that's what he wants then... that's what we'll have to do,” Lobster Claws muttered bitterly.

“Look none of us want to do that,” Beard Deer said, trying to soothe the others. “But if that's what Marco needs than so help me that is what he is going to get.” He slammed a claw into his fist as his eyebrows narrowed in resolve. “So until Marco says otherwise, nobody goes into his room, end of story.”  

“Right!” the other Monsters shouted as one, nodding in agreement with their temporary leader.

For the next half-hour the Monsters all just sat around, waiting for either Buff Frog to get back or Marco to exit his room, neither of which happened. The mood in the room was a depressing one, every single Monster worried for their child and having to fight the overwhelming urge to run into the room and comfort him. Many tried to get their minds off of the young boy upstairs but, no matter what, it seemed the Monsters eyes were constantly drawn to the second story of the cozy cottage as they continued to cast worried stares in that direction every few seconds.

Finally, Beard Deer heard the tell-tale sound of a portal opening outside, followed by footprints and he shushed the other Monsters, informing everyone, “Quiet, someone's here!”

“Do you think Buff Frog is back?” Lobster Claws asked hopefully.

But as if on cue the crustacean's hope was dashed, as a familiar bubbly voice instead called out, “Oh, Marcooo?” The Monsters all shared a grimace as they recognized the visitor as none other than Star Butterfly, her cheery voice practically a sing-song as she shouted her boyfriend's name. They knew the princess would want to see Marco, especially if she found out something was wrong with him, but they had already promised to keep visitors away while the boy was recovering, meaning that they would have to somehow get rid of her.

“Quick, do something?!” Beard Deer shouted to the others, who all looked around lost.

“Like what?” Man Arm asked with a shrug.

“I don't know, anything! we have to keep her away from Marco!” the deer Monster hissed in response.

“Uh, okay, Potato Baby, go distract her!” Lobster Claws said to his friend, who gave a garble of surprise, pointing at himself in confusion. “Oh right, forgot she can't understand you,” the crustacean replied sheepishly, his eyes scanning the room of Monsters. “Anyone else want to-”

There was a knock on the front door, as Star's voice rang out once again, “Hello, Marco? Buff Frog? Anyone home?” The Monsters all panicked, Beard Deer shoving Bearicorn to the door, telling him in a violent whisper, “Say something, idiot!”

The bear stumbled, before looking back at his leader with a lost look. “Like what?”

“I don't know, just make something up!” Beard Deer quietly demanded.

“Ummm, nobodies home,” Bearicorn finally said, Star asking from the other side of the door, “What?”

The Monsters all face-palmed at that, while the bear Monster attempted to correct his mistake, stumbling out, “Uhhh, what I mean is- um, I'm the only one here. Just me, Bearicorn and no one else.”

There was a pause from outside the door followed by a knob being turned, Star saying suspiciously, “Are you sure?”

Bearicorn quickly moved in front of the door, using his paw to stop it from being opened further and trying to block the wide-eyed Star off from seeing inside the cottage. “Nope, nobody here but us bears, ha ha.” The Monster let out a nervous laugh, which caused Star's eyebrow to raise, clearly not buying the lie. It seemed she now knew where exactly Marco got his own inability to lie from. The difference here was that when Marco did it she found it cute and endearing, now she found it infuriating as it was being used to block her way to her Marco and that was something she wouldn't stand for.  So rather than play along, she cut straight to the point, saying in an almost dangerous tone, “Look Bearicorn, I know you're lying to me because Marco specifically told me this was where he would be after the meeting and since I know for a fact that he's not at the castle than he has to be here. So whatever the reason is you've decided to keep me from going inside to see him, I suggest you move. Now.”

The last word was spoken with such conviction that Bearicorn gulped and immediately backed away, allowing the girl inside, fearing for his life as he let out a quiet, near silent, “O-Okay.” Once Star was inside, she looked around at all the startled Monsters watching her intensely as if waiting for her to suddenly attack them and asked, “Okay, what's going on? Why are you guys being weird and trying to keep me out of the house? Did something happen that I should know about?” Her hands were on her hips as she waited for an answer from the skittish Monsters, who all refused to look her way.

“Guyyyssss?” she pressed, using all her powers of persuasion to get the information she wanted. “Does this have to do with Marco?”

That seemed to be enough to break them as Lobster Claws suddenly blurted out, “Marco's upset!”

“What?!” Star shouted in surprise, not expecting to hear that out of nowhere. “Why what's wrong, what happened?” she asked in concern, her eyes full of worry for the boy.

“We don't know, he said he didn't want to talk about it and stormed up to his room and locked himself in,” Beard Deer explained to the perplexed Star.

“We were kinda hoping you would know, actually,” Bearicorn said sheepishly, giving her a hopeful look.

Star reluctantly shook her head. “I have no idea,” she admitted with a small shrug. “He seemed fine during the meeting and I can't think of anything that could have upset him before then.” She looked up at the Monsters with a now questioning look as she asked, “Did you try and ask him what was wrong?”

Beard Deer rolled his eyes. “We're not idiots Star, of course we did,” the Monster grumbled, clearly offended by her lack of faith in their ability to take care of the child. “Like I said, he didn't want to talk about it.”

“Yes, which was Marco's way of saying he needed to talk about it,” Star countered, giving them all a hard stare.

The Monsters all shared a perplexed look, several scratching their heads in clear confusion, Lobster Claws asking, “Really?”

“Well then why didn't he juzzt zzay that?” Boo Fly asked.

Star let out a sigh and covered her face with her hands. “Because teenagers never say how they're really feeling when their upset,” she explained, leaving the Monsters even more lost than before, the girl practically able to see the gears turning in their heads as they tried to process this information. “You guys don't know anything about teenagers, do you?” Star asked and their sheepish faces were telling enough to the truth. She would normally find it funny that a group of once dangerous killers had now turned into befuddled buffoons as they tried to wrap their heads around the complicated concept that was the teenage mind, but she was too worried about Marco to think of much else.

So instead, Star frowned still trying to think of what could be upsetting the boy with no luck. “Well I better go talk to him,” she said taking a step forward only to be cut off by Beard Deer who moved in her way.

“Wait, Marco said he didn't want to see anyone right now!” Beard Deer said in panic.

“Which is why I need to see him,” Star pushed, taking another step toward the stairs, uncaring of the Monster in her path, expecting him to move but was surprised when he did not. “Look Marco is up there right now, probably crying and I'm not just gonna stand here and wait for him to get better on his own,” Star said, the unwavering resolve in her tone causing Beard Deer to sway some, but he held firm as he shook his head.

“I'm sorry Star, but we all agreed to give Marco his space while he figures this out, we can't push him when he doesn't want to talk about it,” the Monster replied.

“I'm not going to push him,” Star argued. “I just don't want him to suffer alone, I want to be there to comfort him.”

The Monsters' faces seemed to soften from that, Beard Deer opening his mouth to say something to the girl, but Star wasn't taking any chances as she shouted out, “Glitter Discoball Distraction!” There was a flash of pink light and a second later a giant discoball hung from the center of the room, spinning wildly and sending colors everywhere, the Monsters gazing up at it in awe. Star used the second of hesitation to push past the deer Monster and run up the flight of stairs. Beard Deer recovered quickly, shaking his head clear of the hallucinating allure of the floating ball and chasing after the girl, who at this point had reached Marco's door. She knocked on it once, saying, “Marco, it's Star, can I come in?”

Beard Deer reached the top of the stairs just in time to hear this and shouted in panic, “No wait, Star don't-”

“Okay,” a small voice said from the other side of the thin wood and the blond royal quickly obeyed entering inside, leaving a slack-jawed Beard Deer standing awkwardly in the hallway.

Once inside, Star did a quick survey of the room, or what she could see of it. The room was completely in the dark, the curtains to the large window pulled tightly closed and no other light source was on, making it hard to make out any features. This instantly concerned Star knowing Marco hated the dark, not out of fear for it but out of bad memories of it, his old room growing up under Toffee's rule always dreary and devoid of much, if any, light causing him to grow a strong distaste for any rooms lacking a strong, positive light source. His room in the castle was always full of light, Marco leaving the window open at all times, even at night to allow as much light to bath his room as possible and Buff Frog and the others had made sure to give Marco the same luxury at their home as well. So the fact that he had intentionally closed the curtains and allowed himself to sit in inky blackness for a long period of time was a major tipping off point for Star.

She didn't wait for her eyes to adjust as she stumbled forward into the room, remembering after a second to use her want to light up the room as she searched for her bestie. She found his form leaning against his bedpost, his legs drawn up to his chest and his face buried in his knees. Star approached tenderly, making sure to take slow, steady steps over to her boyfriend, as she examined his form. Which was quite difficult to do since he had pulled his hood up to try and hide his face. Star spotted the pair of glasses he had worn earlier sitting next to him. She sat down in front of him, just listening to his shallow breathing for a moment, before softly saying, “Marco.”

The boy tensed up, his hold on his legs increasing slightly and Star felt her heart ache at the sight of him looking so troubled and upset. She wanted to wrap him up in a tight hug and will all his worries and fears away but she wasn't sure that would be the right action right now, she needed to understand what was upsetting him first so she could begin to help him. “What's wrong, do you want to talk about it?”

Marco shook his head, his breath hitching but to her surprise he answered, seemingly needing to get the weight off his chest. “Am I... a real member.”

Star was surprised by this, her eyes widening as she blurted out, “Of course you are, Marco. I gave you your official title remember?”

Marco finally looked up, matching her gaze with blood-shot eyes, tear stains coating his cheeks. “Yeah I know but everyone thinks that's only because we're dating.”

Star was surprised to hear this, quickly asking, “What, who told you that?”

“Ferguson,” Marco muttered dejectedly and Star frowned. She was going to have a talk with that boy after this.

“Look, Marco you know that's not true,” Star began, her voice light and comforting. “I made you the Monster representative because I believed in you and knew that no one could do this job better than you, not because your my boyfriend. Remember what we talked about after the Ludo incident? You brought peace to Mewni, you deserve this spot.”

“I know but the others don't see it that way,” Marco said, sniffing as he wiped his nose on his sleeve. “They think I'm a joke, that I don't really belong here. And... maybe their right, I mean everyone is always being so nice to me and everything but I don't understand why. I mean, don't get me wrong, I appreciate it but the Monsters, you, Jackie, Janna, even my own parents, everyone is always making sacrifices to help me and I just don't see what I ever did to deserve it.”

Star stared deep into Marco's sad, self-conscious eyes for a moment, feeling the guilt and overwhelming responsibility that was weighing so heavily on his mind, unable to believe that he would be questioning himself to this degree. The answer to her was so simple that she was generally caught off-guard that the boy wouldn't be able to see the same. She tried to project her feelings onto him using their shared bond, to let him know just how deeply she cared for him, as she answered his question with the most honest answer she had, “Everything.”

“Huh?” the boy said, his eyebrows pinching together in confusion.

“You did everything to deserve it,” Star said, so much love and tenderness in her tone that it caused new tears to spring up in Marco's eyes, feeling a small flickering in his heart, one that made his insides flutter and his heart skip a beat. “I know you doubt yourself sometimes but believe me when I say that you are so much more important than you give yourself credit for. You changed my life, Marco. Before I met you, I hated my life. I was overwhelmed and stressed and sad and I didn't think anything could ever make it all okay. But then I met you.” Star and Marco's cheeks blushed at almost the exact same time at this declaration, the girl grabbing the boy's hand in hers and holding it to her chest in a loving embrace, her eyes twinkling brighter than a thousand stars, small unshed tears making her eyes glassy. “You helped put my life back together, Marco. You gave me purpose and brought joy back into my life again. Without you, I don't even want to think of where I'd be.”

“Same here,” Marco's small voice squeaked out and Star gave him a loving smile. “I owe a lot to you, Star. You gave me a new life and a future and so many other things that I don't think I could name them all. I just... wanted to repay you for that.”

“You already did,” Star told him as the two stared deeply into each others eyes. “The truth is Marco I used to think that I was the light of Mewni, that I had to be there to help people through the darkness, that I was supposed to be some kind of... shining star, for lack of a better word. But when I met you, I realized something.”

“What's that?” Marco asked curiously, his voice small but steady.

Star gave him a long look, the boy able to feel her fast-beating heart from beneath his fingertips as she answered in a choked tone, “That you're my light, Marco.” The boy's suns began to spin wildly at this, his voice hitching as he fought back tears once more. “And I'm yours. That's why we need each other. That's why I made you a member. I didn't do it for no reason, I did it because of how special and qualified you are. You know I wouldn't have made you a member if I didn't think you had what it takes. And trust me, no one has earned that job more than you and I know you have what it takes to be the best representative ever!”

Marco gave her a shy smile, his entire face so red at this point that it could hardly be deciphered  from his own hoodie. “But what about the others? You may believe in me but... no one else does.”

Star reached over and pulled off his hood, trying not to admire the way his hair looked in its adorably disheveled state from being tucked under his hood so long, keeping her focus and gaze under his bright, questioning orbs as she cupped his cheek in her hands. “Then prove them wrong,” she said her tone strong and confident and it filled Marco up with hope. “Show them just how awesome and cool the Marco I know and love is. Do something only you can do.”

“Something only I can do,” Marco repeated softly to himself, thinking over his girlfriend's words.

“Yeah, you got this, Marco, I believe in you,” Star said, cheering her Marco on as she picked up the pair of glasses laying next to him. She gently slid them slowly back onto his face, staring deep into those wondrous chocolate brown eyes she had grown to adore as she said in a soft, tender tone, “I know my Dr. Marco will find a way through this, just like he always does.”

Marco pulled Star closer to him, pressing his lips against hers in thanks, as the two were lost in a breathless kiss. After a few seconds the two pulled away, both panting as Marco said in a joyful tone once more, “Thank you, Star. I'm... gonna make you proud.”

Star giggled as she rested her head against his shoulder, holding him in a tight embrace. She turned whispered softly into his ear, “I already am. Now it's time to make yourself proud.”

Marco nodded, squeezing the girl softly as his heart rate picked up, a determination filling his core. Star was right, he would find a way to prove himself, somehow. His brain was going a million miles a minute as he began to think up a plan, a plan that only he could accomplish and one that he was sure would work. He was gonna show them all what exactly Marco Diaz could do.

And with that the hooded teen felt a small unfamiliar stirring in the pit of his stomach, a new feeling beginning to take shape inside him, an inkling of an emotion, a flicker of self-worth. He was unfamiliar with this almost nonexistent emotion, only feeling it it in small bits and pieces whenever someone would compliment him, but now this wasn't coming from someone's words, it was coming from him. It wasn't much right now but with time he would continue to nurture and grow it into fruition, until someday it would feel as normal and natural to him as breathing.

“I will,” he said confidently, his voice stronger than he expected it to be. His hold on his Star never lightening as he declared to the blond royal, as well as himself, “Just wait and see.”

…

Buff Frog hummed a tune as he walked along the path leading to his home, a bright smile on his face as he ascended the steps to the door. He couldn't wait to see Marco and ask his son how his day had gone, knowing the boy had planned to meet up there after everything was over. He had been silently wishing him luck, praying to all the powers that be that his meeting went well, but feeling hopeful that all was alright and that his son and his girlfriend had handled things just fine.

But as he opened the door, his smile dropped, the song dying on his lips, switching to shock as he saw the large discoball still hovering in the air. But although this sight was peculiar and unexpected, seeing all the Monsters standing around nervously, their gaze on the upstairs staircase, he quickly feared the worst at once, especially when he didn't see Marco in the crowd. “What is wrong?” the frog asked immediately and every Monster turned to him flabbergasted, clearly too focused on whatever they were staring at to hear him enter.

“Oh Buff Frog are we ever glad to see you,” Lobster Claws said in relief.

“Where is Marco? What happened?” Buff Frog asked, taking quick survey of the room, his eyes hesitating on the magical glass ball above him. “And why is there giant hanging light in house?”

The Monsters all shared a look, before they all began speaking at once, their voices blending together and making it impossible for the amphibian to understand a single one of them. He raised up a hand, silencing them all  instantly, before saying, “Please, one at a time.”

“Okay, well, first Marco showed up at the house while you weren't here,” Lobster Claws began, a different Monster continued.

“And then he was all upset about something and we didn't know what to do,” the two-headed Monster's left head exclaimed, the right nodding in agreement.

Potato Baby garbled something for a few seconds, before a different Monster picked up the story in his place.

“And so then Marco ran off into his room and told us he wanted to be alone,” Spike Balls continued.

“Did you try and talk to him?” Buff Frog asked and the Monsters all shared a sheepish look.

“Um, wellllll...” Man Arm muttered tapping his clawed and human fingers together ashamedly.

“You didn't did you?” the frog asked and the Monsters all shared a look.

“Yeah but he said he didn't want to talk to anyone!” Beard Deer exclaimed defensively.

“Yes and that was his way of asking for help,” Buff Frog explained, the Monsters all looking at him in shock.

“That doesn't make any sense,” Bearicorn pointed out.

The amphibian chuckled at that, putting a claw on his friend's shoulder. “Welcome to raising teenager.” The Monsters were silent after that, not knowing how to respond and so Buff Frog asked them in a serious tone, “So is Marco still alone in room?”

“No Zzztar izz in there with him,” Boo Fly said and the Monster nodded approvingly.

“Good, then should be nothing to worry about,” the Monster leader said, the others all sharing guilty looks, Potato Baby garbling something to Lobster Claws.

“No, I don't think we should tell him about that, either,” Lobster Claws whispered back to his friend.

“So wait, your telling us that when Marco said he didn't want to talk about it, that that meant that he did want to talk about it,” Beard Deer asked in confusion, his brain spinning as he tried to make sense of it all. “And that when he said that nothing was wrong, there was something wrong. And when he said he wanted to be alone that meant he wanted someone to comfort him.”

“Da,” Buff Frog replied nonchalantly.

“So basically the opposite of what he really meant,” Beard Deer asked for clarity, putting his claws together for emphasis.

“Pretty much, that is correct,” Buff Frog said.

There was a pause, the two Monsters just sharing a long look. “Teenagers are confusing,” Beard Deer suddenly groaned, giving up on trying to understand Marco's complicated mind-set.

“Is true,” Buff Frog said to his friend, talking a step closer and patting his shoulder. “Parenting can be very hard, but also very rewarding, too.”

“Maybe we'll just let you stick to the parenting for a while,” Bearicorn grumbled.

The sound of the door opening upstairs, drew everyone's attention as they all looked up at the stairs with held breath. After a few intense, never-wracking seconds the two teens appeared at the top of the staircase, a smile now on Marco's face as he held Star's hand in his. “Hey, guys,” Marco greeted them in his usual cheeriness. Every Monster let out a visible breath of relief to see the boy recovered from whatever had troubled him so and back to normal once more. The two Mewmans shared a look before descending the stairs, still hand in hand.

“Are you okay, now, Marco?” Spike Balls asked, his voice still ringing in concern.

“We were really worried about you,” Lobster Claws admitted.

“Yeah, I'm fine now, sorry for worrying you all,” Marco said once he was at the bottom of the stairs, giving his girlfriend a quick grin. “Star helped cheer me up.”

“Are you really okay or are you just saying that?” the right-headed Monster asked.

“Huh, what do you mean?” Marco asked and the Monsters all shared a look of confusion and concern, feeling like they had just messed up once again.

“What Monsters mean to say is,” Buff Frog took over before his comrades could make things any worse. He bent down so he was level with the boy, putting a claw on the top of his frizzy hair. “Is whatever you worrying about solved now?”

Marco nodded. “Yeah, I think so. I was just feeling insecure is all,” Marco explained, his eyes full of pain for a second and Buff Frog's heart went out to his son. But the boy quickly shook his head, a confidence shining in his eyes once more, as he clenched his fist in determination. “But I'm ready to move forward. No worries or doubts. I can do this if I just give it my all.”

Buff Frog gave a hearty chuckle, ruffling the boy's hair like Beard Deer always did. “I sure you will.” He stood back up, his smile never leaving his lips as the amphibian asked, “But in meantime, how about cake to celebrate first day?”

“Yes please!” both Star and Marco said at the same time. They shared a quick look, before laughing out loud at their synchronized sentence.

A few minutes later the atmosphere in the cottage had returned to normal as everyone settled down and enjoyed their own slices of the large chocolate cake, Star and Marco sat at the couch, hand in hand as they both described the meeting in detail and how it had gone to the curious Monsters between bites of the tasty treat.

“So then you guys are working on giving the Monster's more rights?” Lobster Claws asked and Star nodded.

“Yeah, that's the plan anyway. Right now it's mostly just a bunch of us throwing ideas out there and while some of them are good, I'm just not sure how much they'll really help in the long run.”

“Funny you should mention that,” Marco said softly and everyone's eyes jumped to him. He took a bite of his cake, clearly trying to act nonchalant and not look like he was hiding something, but this only caused him to be super conspicuous, clearly only pretending to be oblivious.  

“What?” Star asked, giving him a tiny nudge with her elbow. “You got some kind of plan.”

“Mayyyybbbeee,” Marco said slowly, a small smile on his face, clearly lying.

Star raised a playful eyebrow and he cracked, tapping his plate absentmindedly with his fork as he explained, “I was thinking about what we talked about, about me doing something only I can do, and I think I have an idea of what that could be.”

Star leaned closer, setting her plate aside as she leaned on her elbows, giving him all the attention in the world. “Well then, by all means, Marco. Please go on.”

“Yeah, we're all ears, aren't we guys?” Bearicorn said and the other Monsters all nodding waiting for him to continue, most looking like they were on the edge of their seat.

Marco let out a small chuckle, smiling at his girlfriend and family members, their love and support fueling his resolve even more and he felt the small spark of self-worth grow just a bit more. He sucked in a deep breath before strongly and confidently telling them all his one-of-a-kind, self-concocted idea.

#star vs #Star vs AU #My Writing #Light of the Sun and Stars #Starco

[carolcon]

I Know

I can’t quite remember when I started to hate myself. I can’t remember when I started to feel shameful about being me. But for a long time, I did not want to be Caroline. 

The vessel my brain was controlling did not feel like mine. 

The image I fabricated about who or what I was meant to be did not match what I examined in the mirror. 

I wanted to wear the outfits that I envisioned for myself.

But I would slide into the sleeves and pant legs

And it wasn’t the presumed shape.

The fabric did not fall over me like a blanket is effortlessly tossed over the edge of a chair. 

It squeezed me like a sausage, into a femininely shaped casing.

God, I hated being a girl.

I’ve never wanted children, so why the fuck was I burdened with birthing hips?

I don’t need to be called ma’am or miss to feel respected by men.

What I need is to feel that the way my body grows respects my thoughts.

I have been fighting off natural and healthy homeostatic mechanisms for years just to feel like my body matches my brain.

FINALLY, I feel like I am able to be who I am, dress myself how I always wanted, not having to conform to a certain style that will better suit whatever body type I have. Fuck What Not to Wear. You taught me wrong. I will wear skater boy attire to my grave.

So, 6-year-old Caroline who felt shameful for being mistaken for her mother’s son on a daily basis fully embraces that shit at 23 years old. 

Because it is cool as fuck to be able to be whoever I feel I am on any given day.

It is my  god-given right to play with identity.

I don’t have to be her, she, girl, lady, woman.

I don’t have to wear tapered shirts, dresses, skirts, v-neck shirts, grow out my hair, act small and feeble, shut my mouth, to make other people feel comfortable, to make myself a more obvious female.

I don’t care about attracting men. It’s not my problem. 

And if I could go the rest of my life without being catcalled, I’d be liberated.

I have never been a sexual human being so why am I trying to sexualize myself? To satisfy others? haha. That’s funny

I know who I am.

FINALLY, I feel in my heart that I am who I was always meant to be.

The way my legs fall and dangle and push and jump.

The way my arms lift, stretch, hold, pull.

The way my torso twists, contracts, braces, ebbs and swells.

The way my hair bobs, dances, whips, and glides.

And the way my mind focuses, drifts, explores, stirs, expands, absorbs, crashes, builds.

[womanlalaboy]

Surf It #2: The Surfing Continues

Separation anxiety hit hard that morning on our last day in Baler while we're on our way to the terminal. When we went past the signage saying we're leaving San Luis, I cried and vowed to myself that I'll come back. I never expected anything from the trip apart from swimming in the sea. I never imagined that I'd leave the place like a whole new person, wanting to go back and learn more surfing from the locals. Oh boy, I didn't simply go back. I basically trained my mind and body for my next surf session.

January 2018, I started my health and wellness journey. I've completely changed my lifestyle by incorporating as many vegetables and fruits in my diet, reducing my white rice intake, doing intermittent fasting, prioritizing my hydration, drinking tea every day, resisting the urge to binge on sweets, working out 5 times a week and avoiding constantly sitting. My colleagues who were doing Muay Thai taught me the basics. I've started watching yoga tutorials to help me with my breathing and stretching. In return, my period and bowel movement became regular, my endurance, breathing and sleep quality got better. I've stopped snoring, stopped craving meat and sweets. I've gotten more comfortable drinking tea and eating the vegetables I used to hate. I've become more patient, understanding, relaxed, and kind, especially to myself. I've lost a lot of weight and gained a tremendous amount of strength.

May 2018, I went back to Baler and showcased how I've changed. This time, Daddy Dan prioritized the new member of our Baler Barkada, Charina. He endorsed me to another instructor, Koikoy who was also at the despedida drinking session from our last visit. He taught me a lot about turning the board when it gets unstable, taught me where to put my weight, and gave a few consistency tips for me to have a long ride. I've gotten better, people. I've learned and am still learning.

The weather's merciful that time so we were able to surf not just once, but thrice, and we're proud that all three of us have learned how to paddle and do long rides with longboards. My friend Paolo dared using hard top which made Charina and I jealous of this experience. Charina easily got the hang of using an 8 ft longboard, but she easily loses her endurance and eventually balance after quite a while.

No matter how much we enjoyed the trip, we still had to leave the place, but after 3 months, we ached to see the Aurora landscape. This time, 5 of us went back. 5 of us surfed, and with every ride and with more people helping us out, we got better. Apart from Koikoy, Ian who once won a competition at Cobra Reef taught me surfing. We're around the same height, but that kid rips hard. We stayed at his dad’s kubo and his dad gave me the shirt Ian got from that competition. We've also met Alvin who once taught Andi Eigenman how to surf.

I think August 2018 marked the peak of my obsession with surfing. I couldn’t stop thinking about it- was even dreaming about it. I’ve followed surfers from around the globe, browsed the internet for anything surfing related, searched online how breaks are created, what type of board is best for beginners, where else to surf in the Philippines and so much more. I talked about this with a former colleague; the same person who taught me the basics of Muay Thai. She suggested that I practice with a skateboard and even let me borrow her son’s penny board. Everything was self-taught as we knew no one that could teach me. Every day since the day I got to borrow his son’s board, I practiced at home how to balance on a skateboard, how to eventually ride and then turn the board. Every day from August to November, I’ve been practicing my curves and got better at it. So much respect for all the skaters out there, by the way. You’re all rad!

We knew Baler isn’t the only place where we can explore surfing. When I got the chance to visit Liwliwa, I made sure to get acquainted with their waves and challenge my balance that I’ve been trying to improve with skateboarding and Muay Thai. We surfed around 5 PM so the waves are bigger and rougher than usual, really good for surfing. We’ve met surfers who just got back from a competition in Siargao. They were quite intense. The ones who taught us in Baler are very cautious and protective, but these Liwliwa guys are like training you to really surf. For the first time, Charina and I used hard top Mini Mals. It’s quite satisfying to ride. It’s a lot smoother than soft tops and easier to paddle with. I’ve decided right there and then to get myself a single fin Mini Mal in the future. I’ve decided right there and then that long-boarding is going to be my game.

The surfing never stopped there. I celebrated my birth month in Elyu and had 2 sessions with Elyu Classic. This time, I felt rusty. I haven’t been working out and I was still trying to get the hang of my new working shift. Let’s just say that I wasn’t in good condition to surf, but I did it anyway. And though I know I can now ride waves, I’m still not confident catching my own so I always seek for an instructor’s help.

I’m just always lucky for meeting nice instructors- or maybe all surfing instructors are nice? I don’t know. I’d like to think they all are. I want to hope that they all are. My instructors have been very protective and careful not to give too big of a wave, helping me out whenever I couldn’t reach the seabed after a bad wipeout and basically coaching me to get better not because it’s their job, but because they also want people like me to experience the bliss of being able to surf.

The next month, I went back to Baler to witness the Aurora Surfing Challenge. It was held at Aliya Surf Camp. Most of our stay there were filled with staring at the ocean, predicting the surfers’ moves, cheering for the underdogs, and celebrating their wins. Neil Sanchez banged the shortboard category while Dan won the longboard category. Both winners are Daddy Dan’s nephews. He couldn’t be more proud. He found us a spot under the bay walk so we can see the action up-close, and he made sure to congratulate the boys right after every heat.

The shortboard category sure is filled with thrill, while the longboard category looked majestic to me. I remember envisioning myself doing hang 5 while having a very long ride. Y’all. I was able to walk on the board later that day. Only I can step my foot forward, but not backward. But I’ll get there someday- all 10 toes on the nose. I’ll eventually get there.

March this year, I visited La Union again and shared the waves with many friends, one of which decided to buy a second-hand board from one of the pro surfers there. We also had help from Nano Surf’s instructors. 

While I can’t surf yet, I try to practice to get better balance, workout to have lighter weight, better endurance, and build up the will to get better at surfing. I’ve still got a long way to go. Those that I’ve gotten to know so far have been surfing all their lives, and I’ve just started. But that’s not going to stop me to get better at the things I love to do. Besides, nothing worth it is ever easy and when you love something, you work hard for it.

Header: Idel Laza Aerial view of Elyu: Jeff 2nd to the last photo: Idel

MORE...

Also read:  Surf It: Newbie Also read:  Paradigm Shift Also read:  Byaheng Baler: Womanlalaboy’s Travel Guide to Baler, Aurora

#womanlalaboy #lublob #travelogues #baler #beach #surf #surfing #surfer #surf spot #sea #sea waves #beaches #beaches in the philippines #philippines #la union #elyu #liwliwa #zambales #la paz shoreline #surf board

[fieryrondo]

What do you think about RPF in general? And do your family / friends / colleagues know you write fanfic?

Oh boy what a question. ^^ This is not actually the first time I’ve gotten this question but I’ve had some time to sit on this and have reached the point where I feel ok with sharing.

My thoughts about RPF in general? It’s an extremely controversial (perhaps the most controversial) subgenre of fanfiction that is fraught with moral, legal and ethical implications. Fanfiction writers themselves are divided on this, with reactions running the gamut of enthusiasm to downright disgust. Why do you invade their privacy by writing about real people? Why can’t you make up your own characters? What if so-and-so reads your fic? Won’t they find it creepy?

All valid questions that I return to every time I put pen to paper.

When I wrote my first RPF, The (Un)Banquet (yes, I wrote that one…) back in December 2016, I admit I didn’t think very seriously about the moral implications of writing RPF. What went down in Marseilles that December was so absurd, the story just begged to be written. It was fun, it was challenging, (I may have been slightly high when I wrote it) the FS rpf tag was a tiny thing. I had expected to just post the thing and quietly disappear to my corner and resume watching figure skating from afar.

And then came the comments.

I had written fanfiction before (a few things, nothing worth mentioning ^^) but this was the first time I had received feedback. So. Much. Feedback. I was shocked honestly. Feedback from new fans. Feedback from veteran fans. To be honest, the veteran fan feedback scared me the most. Especially the Big Names. Like holy shit, people were actually reading, even sharing it. Oops, I forgot the Junior Grand Prix existed. Uh oh, they actually do celebrate Christmas in Spain and not just Epiphany. Oh no, Daisuke Takahashi actually really likes dogs ^^

Most of it, thankfully, was relatively positive. I think I amused some veteran fans, the way full-grown deer might laugh at the clumsy first steps of a gamboling fawn. Others were less so. How dare I, a three-week-old fan, dared to presume, even from a hypothetical and completely fictional lens, to write about real people? Suddenly, writing RPF no longer seemed quite the carefree activity I had thought it to be. Doubt dogged every word I wrote. How will fans at large receive this? Will they like it? Am I treating the skaters like real people? If the portrayal is not faithful is it at least respectful in spirit?

But I couldn’t stop writing. 

I had fallen into the fandom too deeply, too fast, too attached to the greater-than-life narratives of skaters. Research and setting clear boundaries became my way of compromising. I couldn’t please everyone (and most writers know this is a bad idea) but I could try to make intentions as transparent as possible. It was impossible to learn everything but I would do as much research as I could to avoid making any major missteps that might set off a fan. I hesitate to call it my signature, but the research, partly done out of fear, evolved into a labor of love. Research became almost as fun as writing itself.

Why do I write RPF? I write RPF because I love figure skating. I love the figure skaters, their stories are inspiring, and what we see on the ice and through interviews are only a fraction of the lives they lead. They are regular people who live extraordinary lives, who train and work and dream big dreams. Sometimes they succeed, other times they don’t. Exactly the stuff that makes good writing material. 

I write because I think there’s a story to be told. I like to find meaning in the world, and imagining my favorite skaters struggling with life, overcoming challenges, forging meaningful and lasting relationships, being happy and satisfied, these are the stories that I want to write. And in general, I think many RPF writers feel this way. It’s a writer’s instinct to read between the lines, to fill in the gaps of a story, like glimpsing a unicorn in the forest and trying to assemble an image of it in its entirety. We recognize the final product is a fiction itself (no reputable RPF writer would dare presume to call their work anything other than fiction/AU; it’s just a boundary we don’t ever cross) but the feelings behind the crafting are real.

That being said, fanfiction is a highly personal activity that I only share with very close friends (who incidentally are also fic writers). My family has some vague idea that I write fic (euphemistically called “character study exercises”) but they don’t read my stuff (which may be a blessing because I think even the concept of RPF would weird them out! ^^)

You don’t have to enjoy RPF, and are entitled the right to read whatever you like. For anyone new or interested in RPF, I ask that if it’s possible, please be kind. RPF isn’t “just” RPF; it’s a work of art that someone out there has worked very hard on during their free time. And if you find yourself enjoying their fic, please try to leave feedback for the writer. I can say with absolute certainty that had it not been for the support I received early on, The (Un)Banquet would have been my first and last RPF. I wouldn’t have gone on to write The Pooh Addendum, Tan fuerte, hatsuhinode. El cisne would have never existed. So to all of my readers, past, present, and future, thank you so much for your support.

#fieryrondo #anon asks #fiery answers #rpf #fanfiction #tldr; rpf is complicated and morally grey af but i still love it #my writing #personal #textpost #this post may cost me followers #(and that's ok! please unfollow if you're not comfortable) #but this was important for me to say

[jadorehale]

just dudes being bros

I found this deeeeep within my computer folders. I remember writing it in 2016 while the anime was airing and then not liking it but I just did a quick read and ehh it's not the worst thing I've ever written {ao3}

Figure Skating News: Five-time world champion coach, Victor Nikiforov, and protégée, Katsuki Yuuri, share friendly congratulations peck at Cup of China.

The Daily Mail: 7 Things You Need to Know About Victor Nikiforov and Yuuri Katsuki’s Gold Medal Friendship!

People Magazine: Spotted: Victor Nikiforov & Yuuri Katsuki snuggling closely on ‘bros date’ at Barcelona’s most romantic restaurant!

ESPN: Yuuri Katsuki chimes in on why relationship with world-famous coach, Victor Nikiforov, has been a success! “Victor and I make love multiple times a day,” the figure skater says. These two seem to be the best of friends!

❄

“How come it doesn’t bother you that the international media is still portraying our relationship as platonic? Do you even care?”

“No. Not really.”

“But they’re refusing to take our relationship seriously!”

“So?”

“And all those weird pictures they print of us making out, they keep calling them ‘friendly embraces.’”

“Well, our mouths are great friends at this point.”

“Victor!” Yuuri whined with a pout.

“Yuuuuuri!” Victor sang back, grinning.

While it was true that Yuuri was most adorable when he was angry and riled up, Victor sure wished that Yuuri would put all that fire into preparing for his competition instead of looking up pointless crap to get upset about on his phone. Today was the day of Grand Prix Final free skate and no one knew more than Victor how badly Yuuri wanted that gold medal. As his coach, Victor’s sole focus was on making sure Yuuri’s body was one-hundred percent ready for his program. Which was why he really needed Yuuri to focus on stretching and warming up.

However, as a boyfriend, it really irritated Victor to see Yuuri concerning himself with the silly tabloids that were being written about them. Victor had no idea what Yuuri wanted him to say about the issue or if he was just seeking out validation for his indignation. In truth, Victor didn’t give a crap. If you’d asked him a year ago if he’d ever imagined him and Yuuri becoming an item, he would’ve said no. He’d never dreamed he could be so lucky to be in a relationship with Yuuri, who he’d been head over heels for since the night they first met. So, it was quite difficult for him to care about any negative things people had to say.

“But aren’t you the one who loves attention?” Yuuri stressed. “If the press caught wind of how it really is between the two of us, it would be a media frenzy!”

“Well, short of Phichit Chulanont, the paparazzi are the second best photographers in the world.”

He grabbed the phone from Yuuri’s hand and scrolled through the article until he stopped on a photo of the two of them leaving their hotel, fingers laced together as they shielded their eyes from the sea of flashing cameras.

He held the photo out to Yuuri and said, “Look, how cute! We should have it framed!”

Since he was about to skate, Yuuri didn’t have his glasses on and had to squint to view the photo clearly. When he finally did see the shot that Victor had been raving about, his face fell and he sent Victor a flat look. “Victor, you’re the only one that looks good in this picture.”

“Exactly!” Victor beamed. Someone should’ve told Yuuri that he had a big, fat booger hanging from his nose and spinach in his teeth before he’d been photographed. That person probably should’ve been Victor. But Victor always managed to look like a model in candids, flashing the crowd his signature wink as he casually flipped his hair. “Who knew there’d be such talent in a group of professional camera-holding stalkers.”

Along with his now ritualistic pre-game cry and cuddle session, Yuuri had developed an unhealthy habit of googling nasty things being said about him on the internet to get revved up. For anyone else, this action would seem conceited and egotistical. But for Yuuri, seeing how much people hated him and were attacking him for stealing Victor from the sport online made him even more determined to succeed and show the world that only he could satisfy Victor. It was ridiculous, and absurd, and Victor would be putting an end to it once the Grand Prix Finals were over. However, he wasn’t about to halt anything that could potentially help Yuuri in his fight for gold. But, Yuuri had read enough offensive, anonymous, cyber-bullying comments for one day.

Victor tossed the phone over his shoulder without bothering to see where it landed and ignored Yuuri’s outraged cries. He got a firm grip of Yuuri’s knees and drew them down toward his chest, stretching out his hamstrings.

“My phone screen had better not be cracked!”

“Uspokoit'sya! Don’t worry. You have an Otterbox case. They’re indestructible.” Victor glanced back and saw that a crowd of people were now trampling over the phone, kicking it along as they went but felt no dire urge to chase after it. “No more news headlines,” he told Yuuri sternly. “We need you in the zone for your free skate. Now, give me fifty sit-ups.”

Groaning loudly, Yuuri did as he was told, exercising his abdominal muscles as Victor anchored his feet. It was amazing how far Yuuri had come under his tutelage. Not that Yuuri needed Victor in the first place. He had more than enough potential and talent to do this all on his own. For Victor, it was an honor to watch Yuuri flourish into such an impressive skater. This was the most fun Victor had ever had in his career. Far more enthralling than his own successes. He lived to surprise the masses, and if there was anyone that could shock the world with such a strong comeback after placing dead last the previous year, it was Katsuki Yuuri.

“Twenty more, little piggy,” Victor instructed, proud when Yuuri continued without complaining.

On his last one, he leaned forward and crashed his lips against Victor’s which was a very welcomed surprised. Victor hummed when the kiss turned bold, parting his lips as Yuuri’s tongue licked obscenely into his mouth. Positive reinforcement was important to Victor as a coach and Yuuri deserved a reward for his good behavior.

He’d almost forgotten they were in public until he heard, “Look mommy! Those boys are in love!”

Pulling away, Victor turned and saw a little girl gawking at them with wide eyes and pointing a chubby little finger in their direction. She couldn’t have been more than four-years-old and was so darn cute that Victor was seriously contemplating kidnapping her. She tugged on her mom’s skirt, demanding her attention, and pointed again for her mother to see when Victor closed the distance and placed a soft kiss on Yuuri’s cheek.

“Honey! Haven’t I told you it’s so rude to point!” Her mother quickly swatted her hand down, blushing from severe embarrassment as she began to explain, “They’re not in love. It’s just a good luck kiss between coach and skater. It happens all the time. No way notorious playboy Victor Nikiforov is off the market.”

Victor didn’t need to see Yuuri’s face to know that his expression had darkened. He already knew Yuuri wouldn’t take kindly to that sort of remark and that he’d be furious. The media was always spreading falsehoods. Victor was not a notorious playboy. He was very much the monogamous sort.

The woman looked over at them, cheeks a bright red as she waved. “We’re rooting for you, Katsuki Yuuri! Longtime fan, Mr. Nikiforov. Can I just say that you’re so much sexier in person! Hope to see you back next season!”

She fluttered her lashes seductively and blew him a kiss before flouncing off with her daughter, not at all aware of the damage she’d just wrought. The little girl was still wide-eyed as she was dragged away. It seemed like she hadn’t believed a word her mother had said. Smart girl. Her young curiosity made him smile, reminding him of how he once was as a child. All those long, long, long, long years ago...

With a deep sigh, he turned back to Yuuri, already flinching as he caught the hard set of Yuuri’s jaw and the burning rage behind his eyes. He failed to hide his amused smirk and earned himself an impressive lethal glare.

“Jealous?” he asked.

“You know damn well I am!” Yuuri scowled and hopped up onto his feet.

He turned his back to Victor and continued warming up, running back and forth. His shoulders were tense as he jogged and he was muttering to himself bitterly. Victor moved closer to listen, trying to decipher just what was being said.

“So, it’s not just news reporters, then,” Yuuri was grumbling to himself. “It’s the general public as well. Is it that hard for people to believe that Victor and I are in love? That Victor would want to be in a relationship with me? I need to remember that the outside world only gets to see his good looks and it is I who gets to see the true beauty of his heart. It’s his love shining through that has helped me improve the most. We have something special and amazing and if people can’t see our love then I’ll just have to make them feel it by winning the gold medal!”

“Awwwwwww!!” Victor gushed. Yuuri was seriously the cutest. He just had to hop on top of him and squeeze and hug him tight. “What an adorable internal monologue. Tell me, is this how you always talk in your head?”

“Get. Off. Me!” Yuuri picked himself up from the floor and brushed himself off.  

Victor frowned, pressing a lip to his finger as he tried to figure out how to get back into Yuuri’s good graces. No one would think from just looking at him that Yuuri was such a high-maintenance partner. A part of him loved that Yuuri was a huge drama queen, quick to get jealous over Victor and feel the need to stake his claim. But another part of him couldn’t stand the thought of Yuuri being upset or insecure.

The petulant glower on Yuuri’s face didn’t look like it would be going away anytime soon, which wasn’t ideal in this specific circumstance. The judges definitely wouldn’t find it as cute as Victor did. He was preparing to get down on his knees and beg for forgiveness when Yuuri grabbed him by his very expensive tie and yanked him down to his level.

For a moment, Victor thought Yuuri had only pulled him this close so he could clobber him, but like always, Yuuri took the unexpected route. Which naturally made it impossible for Victor to predict what he was thinking as he began sucking a large bruise on the side of Victor’s neck.

Just as abruptly as Yuuri had grabbed him and reeled him in, he curtly let him go. His face flushed as he avoided Victor’s eyes and stammered, “T—There. That way no one else will be throwing themselves at you. They’ll know you’re mine.”

Victor couldn’t help being extremely delighted by this display and his brain quickly devised a plan. “Hmm, I really don’t think just one will do…You should put one over here too.”

Feigning innocence, he pointed at another spot on his neck, arching so Yuuri could mark there.

“How about here! And here! Oh, there’s good too! Also, here! Da, there too

“Jesus Christ, Victor!” A voice cried. A voice whose owner was just so happened to be flamboyantly Swiss.

“What’s happened to your neck?! Don’t tell me this is some kind of career-ending injury,” Chris gasped. “I don’t think I can make it through another competition season without you.”

“They’re love bites!” Victor presented proudly, showing off the fresh marks littered across his skin. “From my Yuuri.”

He noticed Yuuri trying to slink away and flee the scene of the crime. But before he could go far, Victor locked an arm around his waist and hauled him back to his side. That way Yuuri would have to own up to his work. What he’d done to Victor’s neck was nothing short of a masterpiece. He’d truly left his signature.

Victor turned back to Chris, elaborating, “See, my Yuuri’s very upset that the media isn’t taking our romance seriously.”

“Ah, yes! I’m afraid they’ve done the same thing with my bisexual Bernese Mountain dog, Hans,” Chris commiserated, pulling out his phone and showing them an article on his pooch written by The Inquisitor. “Completely erased his sexuality to fit into some toxic heteronormative box. I showed him a picture of Maccachin and he was absolutely smitten! We should get them together and see if they hit it off. That way, we can be…”

“IN-LAWS!!” Victor shrieked at the same time Chris did.

They squealed excitedly, jumping up and down as they chattered away about wedding plans. They discussed where Hans and Maccachin would vacation on their honeymoon. Victor had heard Fiji was lovely this time of year and Maccachin, the groom-to-be just adored laying out on the beach. He was a real beach bum with expensive tastes and only enjoyed the finest cuisines. He was a lot like his owner in that way.

In the midst of his conversation with Chris, Victor noticed Yuuri from the corner of his eye, slumping and staring down at the floor.

“Oh, Yuuri, don’t think too much into the media thing,” Chris said, reaching out and pinching Yuuri’s left butt cheek. A trick that was very effective in removing that sad, dejected expression from Yuuri’s face, replacing it with scandalized one. “News reporters can be so oblivious sometimes. Only seeing what they want to see. Every skater here knows how in love the two of you are. You’ve got tons of teenage girls on social media ‘shipping’ you. They’ve named you…Victuuri!”

“Victuuri? Eh!! Why does Victor’s name get to go first?!”

“Because I’m the one that fell in love first!”

“Please, not that again,” Yuuri sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Don’t start that argument here before I have to skate. I already told you, I’m sorry I didn’t remember that night!”

“You completely wounded my pride!” Victor harrumphed. “I can’t believe you don’t remember our dancing!”

Chris snickered then declared, “Maybe it’s good that the media doesn’t take you guys seriously. The world already hates you for hogging Victor as your coach. Men and women everywhere will hate you even more if they find out you’ve stolen his heart as well. You’re a very selfish man, Katsuki Yuuri. Adieu!”

With one last ‘good luck’ pinch to Yuuri’s exquisite rump, Chris sauntered off, rejoining his coach and the rest of his entourage. Which left Victor and Yuuri to return to stringently readying Yuuri to take the ice. Sure, it might seem like they were going a little overboard but they were both aware of how important it was for Yuuri to nail every jump in his routine and execute his presentation perfectly.

On the outside, Victor exuded nothing but positive energy and optimism, but on the inside, he was a nervous wreck. He worried that Yakov might be right. That he wouldn’t be able to pull off this massive victory his first time as a coach. It would kill him if, for some unfortunate reason, they missed the podium. Victor didn’t want to lose the opportunity to pair skate with Yuuri at his gala exhibition. And poor Yuuri; what would become of his spirit if he failed? Obviously, Victor wasn’t going to let that happen, but what if it did. He refused to let Yuuri take any of the blame. He’d take full responsibility as his coach.

Victor watched Yuuri silently lacing up his skates, not liking how solemn and morose he was so close to his free skate. It was often difficult for Victor to get into Yuuri’s head and figure out what was going on with him. Which was a telling sign that he was a terrible coach. After all, this was it! Potentially Yuuri’s last performance before he retired from figure-skating. Though, if Victor had his way, Yuuri would never retire. Still, it made sense that Yuuri would be in such a mood being on the brink of making history.

“Have I really stolen your heart?”

Victor’s head snapped up sharply. “…What does that mean?”

One day in the future, Victor hoped Yuuri would stop asking him such provoking questions. Even though they both spoke fluent English—their best common language—Victor planned on purchasing Rosetta Stone. That way he could learn Japanese and finally understand Yuuri. It was evident that he wasn’t speaking English well enough. Not with the way Yuuri was constantly doubting his love.

Yuuri’s voice was barely a whisper as he fiddled with his thumbs, not looking up. “I mean, will I get to keep it forever?”

“Of course.”

Victor wasn’t remotely surprised when Yuuri huffed and rolled his eyes. “How do you know?”

Victor shrugged. “I just do.”

“But how?!”

Exasperated, Victor placed a hand on his hip. “What’s gotten into you? Why the sudden mood swing? Is it the news outlets? Because them not acknowledging that we’re together doesn’t mean anything. Listen to me and not them! I refuse to live without you. I won’t stand for it.”

“But what if after I retire, I let myself go and gain a ton of weight? Or what if we lose our romantic spark and you get bored of me? There’s nothing exciting to keep you here. What if in a couple of years, you wake up and realize this was a huge mistake? I’m a terrible nag and at the same time a giant hypocrite. I’m messy and horrible at cleaning up after myself. What if all we do is fight and bicker and you start to hate me? I majorly lack self-confidence. What if that starts to annoy you too? Me always doubting myself can be a hassle. Hell, I’m doubting myself right now!”

Victor opened and closed his mouth a few times, gaping like a fish. Yuuri had some nerve trying to convince him to stop loving him. He stepped forward and leaned his forehead against Yuuri’s, cupping his cheek. “I think you already know nothing you come up with will change how I feel about you. Am I right?”

“But—” Yuuri protested.

“Nothing,” Victor repeated firmly.

Yuuri peered into his eyes for a moment longer, eventually giving up and sagging his shoulders. “I believe you.”

Yuuri inched closer, his long lashes fluttering closed as he went to give Victor a kiss. But before their lips could meet, Victor stopped and asked, “What about me?”

“Hmm?” Yuuri blinked multiple times when he opened his eyes.

“Will you always love me?”

“Of course!” Yuuri snorted, waving it off as an unserious question then tried to kiss Victor again.

Victor evaded his lips. “Even when all my hair turns gray?”

“Er…um…” Yuuri squirmed uncomfortably, distress in his eyes as he fumbled for the right words. “How— How do I say this? All your hair is already…um…gray...er…silver…?”

“What?!?” Victor cried, his mouth falling open as he reached up and tentatively touched his hair like he was noticing this for the first time. He kept the act up for a couple of seconds before throwing his head back and laughed at how scared Yuuri looked, then dodged a punch to the arm when Yuuri realized he was being insincere.

“I’m just kidding,” Victor snickered, “And my hair is platinum, not gray. But on the subject of getting older, my mother’s side is prone to male pattern baldness. What if the thin spot on the top of my head gets bigger and all my hair falls out? Or what if I don’t age as well as I’m expected to and forget to use under eye cream at night and develop crow’s feet? What if I have to get Botox, or worse, a full facial reconstruction! Will you love me with a new face? What about my fashion sense? What if I lose that too and start walking around in mix-matched patterns and socks with sandals? Will you still love me if I walked around in socks and sandals? What if, Yuuri!!”

“Wow,” Yuuri commented as Victor panted, needing a minute to catch his breath after his rant. “All your concerns are very superficial.”

“Comfort me, Yuuri!” Victor wailed and threw himself into Yuuri’s arms, sighing contently as they immediately wrapped him up securely. Victor buried his face into the side of Yuuri’s neck, feeling at home with the first inhale of Yuuri’s fruity cologne. Never had he felt so safe from the dangers that were inevitable aging.

Yuuri chuckled, pressing a light kiss to Victor’s temple and whispered, “You’ve changed my whole life, Victor. Of course, I’ll be here till the end with you.”

“D’awwwwwww!”

A chorus of cooing echoed from all around them. Victor and Yuuri both jumped at the racket and discovered that not only was everybody leering at them, they were also shamelessly eavesdropping.

“Our wedding vows are going to be so much better than theirs, right babe?” JJ boasted, slinging an arm over his fiancé’s shoulder.

With the exception of JJ and an absent Yurio, the rest of the crowd was in tears. In fact, if Victor hadn’t known any better, he would’ve thought this was a funeral. A box of tissues was being passed around as people sobbed and blubbered, some even crying their mascara off. Most notably amongst the mourners was Otabek Altin. He was the last person Victor would’ve expected to be moved by such an overt demonstration of eternal love. Mainly, because he was Yurio’s new friend and to apply for the job, one must already have their cold dead heart locked in a steel volt in the Himalayas and be committed to hating everything.

Naturally, JJ saw this as an opportunity to plug his new project. “The ghostwriter who wrote my book, Ice Jewel—which comes out January 20th, so stop by your nearest Chapters to pick up a copy or pre-order online—will come up with something a lot less cliché and contrived. Right babe?”

“Shh!!” His fiancé slapped a hand over his mouth, “That was the most romantic thing I’ve ever witnessed. I want to die!”

Victor quickly stepped back from Yuuri and tried to laugh the moment off but was sweating too profusely to be convincing. Yuuri’s face was getting redder by the second and looked like it was about to combust. This was not how they wanted their competitors to see them. They were supposed to be exhibiting that they were at the top of their game, ready to take the world by storm and crush everything in sight. Or at least that’s what Yakov had always taught him to do.

“It’s almost time for you to skate, little piggy. So, get back to work,” Victor decreed. “This is a direct order from your coach. Not your handsome doting lover who spoils you rotten. I won’t have any slackers!”

Who was he kidding? He never acted like a real coach before, so why start now?

Yuuri grimaced. “It’s so embarrassing when you say that word.”

“What word?” Victor asked then scoffed, “Lover? How else would you like me to describe it? No wonder the media doesn’t think we’re together. This world is way too sexually repressed!”

"Yeah, yeah,” Yuuri said, no longer paying him any mind. “Now, just where did you throw my phone?”

So maybe it was a little mean of Victor to let Yuuri search for his phone all on his own knowing that Yuuri wasn’t wearing his glasses. But it was just so funny watching Yuuri bumbling around, eyes scrunched up as they uselessly inspected the floor. Eventually, Yuuri located the phone after two failed attempts, picking up a discarded coke can and an empty water bottle at first. It was impressive that even though the phone had traveled long and far there wasn’t a single ounce of damage, thanks to the case. Victor should totally see if he could get Yuuri an Otterbox sponsorship. After all, sex sells and he knew Yuuri would be able to sell a ton of phone cases with an evocative television ad.

A wild idea suddenly sparked in his mind. One he knew Yuuri definitely wasn’t going to like. Still, this idea had Victor pulling out his own phone and opening his camera app. He snapped a picture with a flash just as Yuuri was bending down to pick something up.

“Eh?! Victor” Yuuri swiveled around and rushed back over to him. “W-What are you doing?!”

“Posting a picture of your juicy bottom on my Instagram.”

“Why?!”

“Because I’d like the world to see how nice and juicy it is.”

“Victor!” Yuuri whined and made a grab for the phone.

“Yuuuuuri!” Victor sang back and kept it out of reach. “Look, I’ve written a risqué caption full of Eros! Maybe the media will see this picture and a news story will break about our insatiable lust for one another?”

“Give it to me right now!” Yuuri grounded out through his teeth and held out his hand.

Thinking it wasn’t worth the spat, Victor handed it over. He expected Yuuri to take the phone and delete the picture immediately, but instead, Yuuri’s fingers began tapping quickly on the screen as his face burned up.

He thrusted the phone back into Victor’s hand and averted his eyes. Victor glanced at it and saw that not only had Yuuri posted the picture, he’d written an even sexier caption that almost blew Victor off his feet and made his nose bleed.

“It’s such a shame that no one would believe me if I told them how you lord over me in bed.” Victor shook his head in amazement. “Bossy, confident, sex torturer, Katsuki Yuuri? Not with how innocent you act in public. No one will believe how mean to me you really are.”

A glint flashed in Yuuri’s eyes as his gaze trailed him up and down. “Oh, you have it so wrong. I think I’m very, very nice to you in bed. Especially when I—”

Once again, it felt like the whole world was listening in, and sure enough, when they looked up they saw everyone staring like they were tuning into a television show. They were rather shameless about it too. Didn’t even have the decency to look remorseful or pretend like they hadn’t been invading people’s very private moments.

It was lucky that they’d caught themselves before they got any more explicit. With Yurio present in the audience, things had to be kept PG-13. He was looking between them now with his big, innocent blue eyes, his brows furrowed in confusion.

“When you what?” he asked Yuuri who was turning very, very red. “Eat pork cutlet bowls?”

Everyone around them who knew better nodded in affirmative, but JJ, of course, had never really been too bright. “I think he meant—”

Thankfully, his fiancée was there to jab an elbow into his gut and cut him off before he could go into detail. Realizing his mistake, he nodded his head along with everyone else and that seemed to satisfy Yurio who just shrugged and walked away with Otabek.

When he was gone, Yuuri groaned and thumped his head against Victor’s chest, his face still hot with shame. “That was unbelievably embarrassing,” he said. “Let’s focus on the competition now and the celebration later. And let’s stop giving these vultures something to eavesdrop on.”

“Da,” Victor chuckled as Yuuri glared at all in their vicinity.

It was time anyway for Yuuri’s skate. They were as prepared as they could be and now was Yuuri’s chance to show his stuff. He pressed a kiss to Yuuri’s cheek and lead him towards the rink. Yuuri’s grip on his hand was like a vice. He was obviously nervous. Victor knew by now that nothing he said could make Yuuri lose those nerves, but he hoped Yuuri would be strong and wouldn’t let them overtake him.

“Even if I don’t win—” Yuuri started, but Victor wasn’t going to let him go any farther with that statement.

“You will win.”

“No, just let me finish.” Yuuri laughed, shaking his head. “Even if I don’t win, thank you for always taking care of me.”

Victor melted into a smile and opened his arms to wrap Yuuri up in a tight hug. He held on for as many squeezes as he could before Yuuri was asked to take the ice then clasped his hand with Yuuri’s and kissed his ring, wishing him luck.

“Well, go on. Show them how much I love you,” Victor said and Yuuri nodded with determination.

He knew something amazing was going to happen today. He just knew. Whether it be Yuuri winning the gold or breaking a world record or even… saying yes to spending the rest of his life with Victor, it was going to be a historical day.

Victor fiddled with the secret velvet box hidden deep within his pocket. His heart thundered in his chest as the music began to play; the happiness and pride overwhelming as he watched Yuuri wield his magic over the crowd.

❄

Morooka: Welcome back, everyone. We just witnessed a beautiful performance by Katsuki Yuuri. One that is bound to make him a top contender in today’s competition and displayed an excellent comeback after his loss last season.

Stéphane: Yes, it was simply magnifique! A perfect performance that shows the true power between this first-time coach and skater duo.

Morooka: Let’s flash over to the kiss and cry to see their scores.

Stéphane: Katsuki Yuuri looks nervous. I don’t know why. No one can doubt that that performance will score high.

Morooka: And he’s broken the world record! In case you’re just tuning in, Katsuki Yuuri has just scored a 221.58 today with his free program. The audience is just going wild.

Stéphane: And what’s this! Victor Nikiforov just got down on one knee and presented Katsuki Yuuri with a ring. What a wonderful congratulations gift from a coach to his skater.

Morooka: I think that’s why their dynamic works so well, Stéphane. Victor is such a caring and rewarding coach.

Stéphane: Let’s see if we can hear what’s going on down there. Ha! It sounds like funny guy Victor there just asked Katsuki Yuuri to marry him and Katsuki Yuuri said yes. There were rumors that Yuuri might be retiring but maybe after this symbol of sheer commitment Victor has displayed today, he might reconsider coming back for another season.

Morooka: As you know, these two have exchanged partnership rings in the past. They have a very close professional relationship. You can tell by how they’re kissing now on the lips.

Stéphane: Yes, such a friendly embrace! I see Victor’s getting a little cheeky there slipping in some tongue.

Morooka: We’ve got some reactions here from twitter. One user says ‘They’re gay, you dumbasses.’ Another says, ‘I can’t wait for Victor and Yuuri’s wedding. You can tell that they’re super in love with each other.’ What do you make of that Stéphane?

Stéphane: Impossible! I see no signs of romance here! Look at how they’re rolling on the floor kissing now. It’s nothing but a coach and skater being excited about a fantastic score.

Morooka: I agree with you, of course, Stéphane. Victor’s done such a great job coaching for the first time. These twitter fans must be seeing something that isn’t there.

Stéphane: Absolument! There’s no way notorious playboy Victor Nikiforov would ever be taken off the market.”

Morooka: You’re right, of course. No way indeed.

#victuuri #victuuri fic #yoi fanfic #viktor nikiforov #yoi #yuuri katsuki #mine: yoi fic #humor fluff

[finefigure]

What Am I Doing This For?

To be completely honest, I had a less-than-satisfactory practice today. It was crowded on the freestyle, so I decided to do small figures, only to realize that my back and left leg were just not having with the speedy twistiness of the small figures right then. I got off the ice ten minutes before the session was over (which I consider sacrilege) when my leg just up and quit working normally, choosing instead to behave as if it had been suddenly possessed by the soul of a sloth.

This is not an uncommon occurrence. Well, the sloth thing is, but me being in so much pain I can barely understand what my coach is saying or remember which figure I’m skating happens at least 25% of the time these days. It’s a disc thing. Not much to be done about it that I’m not already doing, aside from cortisone shots, which I can’t afford.

I sometimes wish I were one of those people who bears pain with silent dignity, but for better or worse, I am instead one of those people who talks about it. And I’m going to stand by my belief that that’s OK. Because pain is real, and it’s not glamorous, and it’s part of being an athlete---particularly an adult athlete.

And boy, did I have a lot of it today. So much so that I thought it would be good for me to write about what keeps me going, and who and what I am doing this for.

I’m doing it for myself.

I’ve said this before. I love skating, and I particularly love figures. There’s something very satisfying about the symmetry and the striving for perfection, and the crunch of the ice under patch blades, and and and... I love them; that’s all. And through figures, I get to meet people I never thought I’d meet, and do things I never dreamed I’d be able to do.

(An incomplete collection of skating paraphernalia that can be found within five feet of my front door on any given day. Top row: Paper on which Nancy got autographs for me at the 2016 Championships, including those of Trixi Schuba, Gary Visconti, Jan Calnan, and Juliana Sweeney-Baird; a graphic issued by WFS of my 2017 creative figure, framed by my mom. Middle row: Just a picture of me and Dorothy Hamill chilling together at the 2017 WFC like we do, also framed by my mom; a photo of Nancy from Deborah Hickey’s beautiful book; a card from Barbara Wagner; my faithful stretchy gloves; one of my former patch boots, signed by Nancy. Bottom row: Someone’s discarded laces--I have literally no idea which of my 18 past or present patch students they belong to; a blade that was once attached to my patch boots; my scribe; my other former patch boot, signed by Barbara Wagner. So, yeah, maybe I’m into this skating thing a little.)

I’m doing it for figure skating.

I believe that it’s vitally important to preserve figures. More than that, I believe that it’s vitally important for all skaters to do figures. I am a rabid figures evangelist, and if you get close enough to me, I will probably infect you if you don’t have the bug already. Right now, competing and coaching are the ways I am attempting to preserve figures: learning from the best and passing it down. 

I’m doing it for WFS.

I really, really believe in what World Figure Sport does, and not just the preservation of figures part. The judges want to judge the figures on their own merits; they don’t want to know who skated what. You are eligible to compete if you are human--and I’m guessing that if another species showed an interest in skating figures, WFS would let them in too. The main thing is really to enjoy figures and do your best. You should have heard all of the competitors in the dressing room coaching each other and asking each other questions at the 2017 WFC. Lisa wrote to me today and said that something I’d mentioned about my own training had helped her fix her rockers. Talking to my competitors has helped me fix things about my skating time and again as well; my patch neighbor, Julie, has great insights. Sarah Jo and I message each other for encouragement/good-natured complaints/advice every few days. Competitors help each other design their creative figures. I told my dad that, and he asked if maybe it was a bad idea to help someone I’m trying to beat. I said we’re not like that; we all want everyone to do as well as they possibly can, and we’re glad to help each other get there. We lift one another up. It makes my heart so happy.

I’m doing it for my students.

I want to share my love of figures with my students (particularly since I require them all to skate them). Also, they are all university students, and usually beginners, and they’re at an age where they’ve heard they’ll never accomplish anything in sports. But they can’t believe that if they see me doing this, can they? 

I’m doing it for my coach.

When I told Nancy that I want to be champion one day like she is now, she didn’t tell me I was too old to be that kind of athlete, or that I could stand to lose 30 pounds first, or that maybe my dream would have been possible if I’d been trained better as a kid, but since I hadn’t been, this wasn’t a realistic thing to hope for. She just listened to me and then said quietly, “We’ll work it out,” and got on with teaching me as hard as she could. Just try to keep yourself from wanting to work your feet off for someone like that. It can’t be done.

Also, to be honest, it’s pretty much impossible to give up due to the pain of a mere bulging disc and some moderate arthritis at age 42 after having just watched your coach skate to a world championship win on a broken pelvis and torn labrum at age 55. So there’s that.

I’m doing it for you.

If you enjoy watching me skate or looking at my figures, then I’m doing it for you. 

And more specifically, some of you who are reading this might have started skating (or skating figures) “late”--whatever that meant to the person who told you that.

When I started skating the first time around, at 16 years old, most people said I was too old to have any kind of “real” skating career. When I was 22, I got very sick and didn’t skate more than a couple of times between then and the age of 39. I started figures when I was 41. That’s very, very, very late, if you believe what most people say.

It’s not true. It wasn’t true for me, and it’s not true for you either. If you are out there on the ice, you are exactly the right age, no matter when you started. We can only be who we are now, and the great thing is that that’s enough.

I am scared to do this competition. But I’m going to do it anyway. And if it is at all possible, I’m going to keep doing it, every year, until I beat the paragraph loops and rockers and Swiss S into submission and win the whole thing.

If that happens, then someone will have won who never tested figures under the old system, who never competed in skating at all or even had a figures lesson until she was over the age of 40, who had been supposedly “too old” to start skating in the first place, and who was never a member of ISI or USFS.

Ralph Hodgson wrote, “Some things have to be believed to be seen.” That’s the stage I’m in right now. I just have to keep working through the pain and occasional bad practices and cling like a tick to my belief that this can be done.

But it is certainly easier to believe once you have seen. That’s why I want to show you.

If I can do it someday, maybe you’ll see that you can too.

#worldfiguresport #worldfigurechampionship

[pxgos]

「 just as fire and ice 」

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀❄

the waiting game was not fun. he did note exactly mind the cold weather, but he particularly disliked being all alone out there. he heard some weird noises in the alleyway, and he knew there were a lot of creepy people lurking around such a place. he was not scared – not even a little bit. but, the idea of being forced to use his godly power did not sit well with him – his adoptive parents worked hard enough as it was, and he would not want to be a burden. he tried to distract himself with a song he played in his mind – and somehow, he followed a routine, invented one that would suit the song. by the time he imagined the end, his friend came out of the building with an idiotic grin plastered on his face.

“it was great! you missed the best part. yuta threw a punch and this guy’s jaw literally cracked. I think he needs surgery,” he was incredibly cheery for what he was saying. theo considered him and scoffed, what about that sounded appealing? he would rather walk on his tiptoes – which he did anyways when he practiced off ice. it was not really a pleasant activity, especially if done for an extended period of time. “so tell me, what’s up with you and yuta?” he inquired, theo did not really want to talk about it. nor did he know how to break it to his friend. hey, I am a demigod is not really the friendliest sentence one could say. luckily, he did not have to say it.

he saw the red haired boy approach them with the gallantry of a stone pillar – his movements were so raw, they almost looked animalistic. of course, it must have only been theo thinking that. girls were lining up to see their ‘hero’, and other young boys, much like his own friend, were throwing words of adoration. but yuta did not stop to enjoy his fame, which was odd considering someone like him would love to bask. instead he headed straight for theo, and for a second he did not know if he should run, it looked like he was a target. his friend was getting giddy, grabbing theo’s arm in the most fanboy way possible.

maybe theo’s heart dropped in his gut – or something. yuta’s words did not sit well with him, and the fact that his friend was so enthusiastic about yuta was making it worse. his friend tilted his head at yuta, he wanted to say something else, but instead he blurted. “mister surrey?” that was theo’s adoptive father’s name, but theo knew yuta did not mean him. his friend got the message and stepped aside, still excited. he joined a group of girls he knew from university, who were all gossiping about yuta and were probably asking his friend why he was talking to theo.

theo considered the man before him – his bruised knuckles looked almost pretty. or at least, pretty considering who he was. they suited him, somehow. he was not blind, he could appreciate yuta’s visuals, yet he never gave it too much thought. perhaps he was just trying to distract himself from the heavy topic, or maybe the cigarette smoke was suffocating him and he needed an escape. he coughed and covered his mouth and nose – as an athlete, such vice would have been the death of his career. it did not seem to bother yuta, and frankly, theo would rather have him calm.

the ridiculous proposition sank in – theo wanted to laugh, so badly. but laughing at yuta’s face might just be the last thing he does, so he did not risk it. he bit his cheeks, and tried to calm down before answering. “right, because two young demigods can take on a centuries old powerful god,” the sarcasm coated every word. he did not mean it as a disrespect – but he did think yuta was rather stupid to even propose it. however, he had a point. his father was not a great man, and he would like to see him perish as well no matter which other god inherits the sea after him. he let out a sigh, and waved a hand before his face to divert the smoke’s direction – gods, yuta was so disrespectful. “we cannot do it alone,” he added, a little more serious this time. he still thought it was ridiculous, an impossible task. but maybe if they had the right help, they could pull it off.

the man he froze earlier walked out of the building with his lady friend, still shivering. when he eyed theo, he straightened up and charged for him. however, yuta’s presence was quite a blessing in disguise. when he saw the young fighter, he faltered in respect and admiration – still suffering of a frostbite. theo did not have any expression on his face, he did not want to give away guilt or regret – he did not regret anything.

“that was a good match,” the man mused, and apologised for the interruption. theo found himself unconsciously smirking satisfied, almost forgetting why he was talking to yuta. yuta’s fanclub cheered along, still very curious why their idol was talking to a figure skater.

“maybe this is not the best time to talk,” theo said, and looked at his watch. it was already late, and he was sure yuta had better things to do, even if this seemed to be quite important for him. they could not do anything about it at the moment. “I think your fans need you,” he added, with a hint of arrogance – or was it jealousy? he took out his phone, and handed it to yuta. “we can meet tomorrow, just type your number in.”

a simple gesture, a million meanings – especially for the onlookers who did not eavesdrop. one of the girls was having a hard time visibly, she even started crying. theo found that very amusing, but tried not to laugh. gods, he really wanted to laugh – he was so amused, yet he knew it was inappropriate to do that without giving yuta a context. otherwise, it would have seemed like he was laughing at him. theo has always been a straight-forward honest person, to his demise.

his gaze fell on yuta again, he looked quite tired. “hey, do you want to get rid of them? I know how,” he offered, a plan already brewing in his mind. he knew exactly what these girls did not want to see – and he knew fair well that they suspected there was something going on between him and yuta. it was a small courtesy, he could help yuta this once. if the idiot was bold enough to propose taking  poseidon down, theo could at least help him get rid of unnecessary people. 

_______ ( @meikosflower​ )

#❆ : threads #❆ : just as fire and ice #❆ : theo x yuta #❆ : replied #❆ : ! violence / blood / graphic language #meikosflower

[from-red-string]

É isso aí - Part 2

So here we go again.  É isso aí.

 You can say I’m really enjoying writing Simbar fics. Yeah I’M LOVING IT.

 Started writing É isso aí during a road travel with 6 hours of duration, maybe I was doing to kill time, anyway it grow on me. Now I just wrote this and it’s 2500 words which was definitively not planned, the length made insecure about it. I just wrote what I felt was needed. 

Thanks Miranda for helping me with it, otherwise I hardly would post it that way.

Said that to the second part of É isso aí. 

Thanks if read it. Tell me your thought about it. I would appreciate the feedback.

PART 1 / PART 3 / FINAL

------------------- 💛-------------------

   We reached a park by sometime. It was dark and windy there and beautiful, through the dim I could see flowers on both sides of the path. Some wild ones broke in the middle of the path. Nature can’t be timed for long. 

   The migraine I had appeared to be a long time ago.

   We were walking for 40 minutes, just some words were said to assure the other still there , some looks exchanged and sometimes my hand rubbed against his making me smile.

    “What are you smiling about?” Simón asked grinning. Damn, think quick! Our steps seem to have the same rhythm. That’s it, pretty lame, but can work out.

    “Our steps are in the same beat.” I said looking at our feet, soon Simón started switch his steps and I tried to follow. - Stop! - I pushed him laughing. - You’re ruining our harmony.

    “Oh yeah?” He stopped turning to face me laughing too. “Do you think we can stop here? Or 40 minutes was not enough walking yet?”

    “Already tired, Simón?” I mocked walking toward a bench, sitting on the part you’re suppose to lay your back. “You are a skater. Shouldn’t you be more resistant?” Simón set beside me but on the right position.

    Looking him in the moonlight was weird, I never could imagine him with me anywhere that wasn’t the rink, not that I am complaining. He is turning around now. I need to pretend I’m not staring. Look at your feet.

    “And you are not?” He said raising his eyebrows at me. I waved disagreeing, not looking at him yet. “You are on heels. How you can do it? Does it not hurt?" 

    “I am used to it.” I answered rotating my feet, he look at me doubtful. “Just a bit, but it really doesn’t bother.” I looked at his eyes trying to make he see it true. I couldn’t keep it and turned my gaze to my heels again. Sure, it hurts but it’s a small price of staying pretty.

   “You don’t need to do this.” Simón put his hand on my right ankle, I pulled away shocked. I wasn’t expecting this. We gazed at each other, my eyes wide and his serene. His hands went around my ankle again, this time I kept my foot froze.

    One more thing to the stuff I am curious about tonight.

    List of things I’m dying to know:

* Pictures and videos from the party.

* Gaston’s aunt full reaction.

* How did I got under the tables.

* Simón’s company.

* What the hell I did last night?

* Simón.

   I doubt I will ever be able to fully understand the last thing, but at least for now I want know as much as I can about it. 

   Simón took my heels off. I was embarrassed, my feet are not exactly beautiful things. And I am overwhelmed by Simón’s touch, I know it’s such a small matter but it feels so... intimate. Not another careless touch or diary action.

   “What?” I was so got up in though I lost track of Simón’s words. He grinned still eyeing my feet, I bit my lips to contain a sigh. “Stop inspecting my feet, weirdo. What is this? Foot fetishism?” Said trying to break the awkwardness I was feeling. Simón laughed shooting his head back and closing his eyes. Just like I said, he did stop staring. I rule him. “Oh. Thank you for quit looking.”

   “Anyway.” He shook his head. “I was telling you that your pain is unneeded. You don’t have to be in pain to...” He paused choosing the correct words. I could almost see gears working in his mind. “Why did you keep the heels on?” That was unexpected. I took my time think on what to answer: the truth or some bullshit. Whatever, I had nothing to lose. 

   “I did for staying pretty.” Saying it out loud made me see it sounds stupid. Simón was quiet, waiting for more, he wasn’t satisfied yet. I shut my eyes not knowing how to proceed, I let out a breath. “I couldn’t let it go. Heels makes me prettier and elegant. Things that are expected for me.” I opened my eyes keeping my gaze lost in somewhere above the trees. “And I have to stay up to the expectancy.” I finished turning to Simón. 

   “No one cares.” Simón blurted instantly. I looked at him in unbelief, he looked back with wide eyes, opened his mouth about to say something, then he closed it. “No one cares, Ámbar.” He repeated, I was getting mad at him. Why is he telling me this?

   “Cool. So no one cares, right?” I shouted intending to stand up. He took my wrist before I could move, I froze.

   “Ámbar, I will not apologize. You can be mad all you want, but it’s true.” He told me grave. “People do not care if you are on heels. Even more when it’s on a party in Gastón’s house.” I face the floor while he was talking. My eyes burned with tears. He just telling me the true.

   “No one cares, because I’m not popular anymore.” I whispered with my voice creaking, the first tear running down my face, soon many more were running down too. 

   “No.” Simón said in despair. “You think no one cares about you? It was not in that way. They don't care about your heels.” He shook his head and sighed looking to arrange the sentence in the best way. “You are beautiful. It’s not your shoes that make you pretty. You could be in heels or flip flops, nothing would change.” I faced him, he raised his hand and hesitated before touching my cheek, almost asking permission to touch me. I closed my eyes feeling his touch and leaned into his hand. “You know in that party there was just the Roller and Jam group, right? If you showed up in your pjs, we couldn’t care less.” I shot my eyes open waiting for the rest. “We were just happy you showed at all.”

   I couldn’t help but disbelieve the party part. Everyone at Roller & Jam must hate me by now. I knew it when I went to the party, I valuated this before. When I was evaluating about the party, I counted how people would treat me and I how I would feel with people around me and being how it would be to be on party, place where human interaction are supposed to be the main, so couldn’t ignore everyone like I was doing in Blake. Even after all, I believed the party was worth it. And I was craving to get out of the mansion at least for a night. Remember how it was to feel the Ámbar-before-Sol.

   “You were?” I asked frowning at him and grabbed Simón’s hand from my cheek. 

   “Yes. We made a party worth Ámbar Smith’s.” He said mockingly smirking. I gaped and slapped his arm, but still grabbing his hand. “Okay. I was glad you come.” He watched our hands and started playing with my fingers, I smiled. I can’t believe he said it. I am little freak out now, through I’m not letting him see it. 

   Today I am pretty and a pleasure to be seen on a party. 

   I kind of already knew it, but come on, hearing this from this cute boy with brown eye is so much better.

   Maybe I’m little bit obsessed with those eyes. Bad thing!

   “And now ‘The sun goes down The stars come out And all’...” I had to sang it, but it was not good idea. I couldn’t resume it. ‘And all that count Is here and now’ it’s to admit and clarify to Simón that I’m into...

   I’m not. A night, it’s a brief amount of time, so I can be falling for him, in development of in fact been in love, but already into him isn’t possible.

   “And all that count Is here and now My universe will never be the same” Simón sang the rest. All my hesitation in confess what I’m (not) feeling turned to ashes. Who cares if I am in love or not? Not me, now. I can just own this for a while.

   We kept eyeing each other, taking that moment and feeling it. The world could freeze or burn to the ground and I wouldn’t had felt or cared it in anyway. I got lost in looking how his iris are dark and I couldn’t help but feel like I was being drag into it. 

   The day gave his first signs of coming and the sun starts to appear and some sunshine to illuminate. In a mute deal, we turned to watch the sunrise in horizon. Somehow, we grown to get closer together, Simón’s head was in my lap, our hands intertwined, my other hand playing with his hair and his free hand on my foot.

   He didn’t answered about the foot fetishism, nor it’s necessary by the way. Weirdo.

   Adorable, but still weirdo the most.

   About what he didn’t said, there is something more I have to question.

   “Simón?” I called and got his attention. “So what about telling me what happened last night?” He grinned at me.

   “Never. If you can’t remember anything, I’m not the one telling you.” He is unbelievable. Why he is telling me?

   “You’re refusing to a girl what happened while she was drunk. I can only assume the worst of you right now.” I mocked him on false disappointment. “Shame on you, Simón. What a terrible person.”

  “I am a terrible person now? I took care of you and I’m a terrible person?” He asked in disbelief. 

   “You took care of me?” I repeated to assure I heard it right.

   There’s a important info in what he said. He took care of me? I must be a mess while drunk for a person to have to be responsible for me and even with someone attending I ended sleeping on the floor under the table. 

   Not only this but also he stayed with me the last night and still here. Does Simón realize this is a big thing or is it a random kind act for him? Because for me it’s not some meaningless thing. He stayed. He could had turned away and he had nothing to do with me, no one could blame him if he kept partying instead of babysitting a drunk girl, yet he stayed.

   “Yes.” Simón answered hesitantly and blushing. It was hard to tell in the dark but Simón is definitively blushing. And that smile. I wished I could be the reason of that many times. He couldn’t even keep his eyes on me, he might be really embarrassed (which was not needed). Simón hinted to take his hand of mine and I hold it tightly. 

   Self-control, Ámbar. Just cute boy doing his stuff. Get your shit together. I sighed and freed his hand a little, I still unable of let it go completely.

   “With your babysitting, I slept on the floor.” I tell him trying to make Simón feel lighter. “My fault or yours?”

   “Yours?” He uttered unsure still a little flushed, I raised a eyebrow at him. Is he really blaming me? “Ours.” He changed his answer quickly and I laughed at him. “You really forgot everything about last night?” This question carried a bit of hurt, sadness, sorrow, something that weighed and made clear it was not a simple ask. 

   “I know how I got at the party.” I said. It was true. I tried to search for things so I could give Simón a better answer than just ‘No’.

   “Only?” He eyed me while asked. His eyes were hopeful. I closed my eyes extending my search.

   “I come through the open door, people watched me while walked into the living room, some waved to me, none intent of truly speaking to me. I found a corner to watch the teenagers interaction, Jazmin and Delfi were dancing and laughing with Pedro, Matteo was being the third wheel of Nina and Gastón, or maybe Nina was the third wheel, anyway Matteo went away when Luna started yelling calling players for some game while she was standing on the top of the table. What a night to that table by the way. 

   A flirting couple decides to settle down next to me. Annoying. So I choose to give them some space. I thought about going to the mansion, it wasn’t like I was doing something in the party. But it’s 11 pm. Too early.” ‘To come back to the cage.’ I paused, I didn’t realize I was thinking out loud. I was telling him everything on my mind without filter. Simón was hearing. Yeah, I gave him something satisfying than ‘No’. Now I have to control the rest. “I.. I went to the kitchen and someone handed me a bottle. My sweet escape from being a outsider in a bottle. Then it’s all a mess, only flashes.”

    ‘My sweet escape from being a outsider in a bottle.’ Filter! The last was to be a consciously say. It sounds as self-pity. What a shame. What the hell?

    ‘Okay.” It’s all he said. I couldn’t look at him. ‘Are telling the rest of the night?” I asked in last try.

    “No.” I had to look at him and frown. “Don’t worry nothing important happened.” Simón comforted me. “You’ll be fine without it.” I needed to know. And I couldn’t tell him I needed to know why he stayed and slept with me, cared for me, accept the walking, the reason he was being kind with me. That I needed to know what changed during the night. “It’s morning already. I think I have to take you home.” I blinked in shock. The sudden change of subject got me surprised. Did I forgetting made Simón mad?

   “I did something wrong?” I burst when he got up. He turned to me softening his feature.

   “No.” He answered calmly frowning. “Why do you ask that?”

   “For...” I couldn’t tell him. “Nothing.” He didn’t believe it I could see it. As well, with that shit answer. I need to repair this. “I can’t put away the feeling that something important happened.” I told the truth. Not all of it but still truth. He got closer put a hand on my cheek and kissed my forehead. 

   “Ámbar, it’s okay. Nothing to worry about.” He comforted me again and took his shoes off.

   “What are you doing?” I questioned confused.

   “If I am walking you home, you have two options.” He said placing his shoes next to my heels. “We can do the walk of shame together or you can wear my shoes.” I smiled at him.

   “I will take the second one, please.” I choose and put his shoes.

   “Ready?” Simón asked taking my heels and when I nodded he offered a hand, which I took without a second thought.

   Once again this night, we walked together.

   But this time, toward the mansion. 

#simbar #simbar fic #💛b #É isso aí #tell if you liked it #soy luna #i loved writting this #miranda thanks again #joia

[titoslondon-blog]

New Post has been published on Titos London

#Blog New Post has been published on http://www.titoslondon.in/is-indian-fashion-industry-ready-for-men-in-androgynous-modelling/

Is Indian fashion industry ready for men in androgynous modelling?

Lemuel Huffman, Kean Rui Alvares, Amit Bitto Dey — men in androgynous modelling in India. (Source: TheBlackPearl Photography/Facebook; Kean Rui Alvares/Alok Johri, Amit Bittoo Dey/Rahul Saha) Related News

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Growing up, Kean Rui Alvares was always fascinated with make-up. “I used to love watching my mother dress up and remember longing to have my own dress rehearsals, unlike most boys of my age,” says Alvares. Now 26, he is a professional make-up artist and model. Like him, there are many men, who like to dress up, can strike the most beautiful poses, whose high cheekbones can steal more than a glance and who have begun slowly, yet steadily, stirring up a change in the Indian fashion industry.

But is the industry here ready to have more androgynous men walk the ramp? Are those experimenting with gender-fluidity feeling accepted? Women have been wearing pants – on the runway as well as off it – for decades now, but what of men in skirts?

The Indian fashion industry is not alien to male androgynous modelling. Wendell Rodricks, veteran fashion designer is known for the softer silhouettes he dresses up his male models in. Designer Arjun Saluja opened his show at the 2012 Wills Lifestyle India Fashion Week in Delhi with a male model wearing a pleated skirt with men’s shirt. The likes of Rohit Bal, Tarun Tahilani and JJ Valaya are known for floral motifs they embellish on their men’s collection, embroidered shawls, etc.

While men attempting to wear pleated skirts or flowy shirts with floral prints on the runway might seem unusual for many, Rodricks insists the concept has its roots deep in Indian history and culture. “If I wear a lungi, an earring and a necklace of pearls, it is not unusual to Indian aesthetics. We have Maharajahs who have worn more jewels than Maharanis, yogis with more drapes than devdasis. This proves that the topic of androgynous dressing is not alien to the East,” he told indianexpress.com.

Wendell Rodricks, Express Archive; LFW Summer Resort 2016

Come to think about it, even the traditional Garba attire for men — ghagras, angarakhas, achkans, churidars are unisex sartorial choices.

SEXUALITY AND ANDROGYNOUS FASHION

Addressing one of the common misconceptions, Alvares asserts that being an androgynous model doesn’t necessarily have to mean that the person is homosexual. “Society tends to perceive visually. I am a man who celebrates both Yin and Yang — my masculinity and femininity.” So when he chooses to dress up and wear make-up, it is a fashion choice and should not be necessarily construed as a projection of his sexuality. He believes society has made rigid categories and gender is one such. “Because of assigned gender roles, men are expected to be tough and women demure,” he said.

(Source: Kean Rui Alvares/Alok Johri Photography) (Source: Kean Rui Alvares/Alok Johri Photography)

Kolkata-based fashion photographer and model Amit Bittoo Dey is excited about his debut in London Fashion Week in September. Even before the 25-year-old started off as a model two years ago, he was experimenting with androgynous fashion, and was no stranger to cynicism and stereotyping; which continued even on his entry into the industry. “Which is why, almost every brand continues to choose only conventional men or women models as their faces,” he explains.

(Source: Amit Bittoo Dey/Arideepto Ghosh)

But, Dey says, his ‘brand of modelling’ has come to be more accepted now. “If compliments could pay bills, I would have been considered a millionaire! So there is hope,” he adds. Chennai-based Lemuel Huffman, a self-proclaimed drag queen, has a similar story. Though he is yet to find complete acceptance, he believes there has been a change for the better. “Compared to when I started, people are much more open now. Not a lot of people still want it, they’d rather have a girl modelling for them,” Huffman says.

Like Alvares, Huffman agrees that androgyny has got little to do with one’s sexuality. “It’s about art. And art shouldn’t conform to categories, including gender.” And it is definitely different from cross-dressing, which “is one’s personal preference of dressing. It is satisfying a fundamental personal quest. Androgyny is about celebrating both the sexes — it’s different,” he says.

(Source: Amit Bittoo Dey/Aniruddha Sen)

UNDERSTANDING ANDROGYNY

Ganesh Toasty, a fashion and beauty photographer from Chennai, says that “90 per cent of the industry” doesn’t understand androgyny. “They only know them as lesbians, gays and transgender persons,” he explains, stating how there are less male Bharatanatyam dancers now because of the femininity rendered by the mudras and bhavas (expressions) of the dance form. “Even if they are heterosexual, they are ridiculed and called gays. Now parents don’t even send their boys to learn dance,” he says. Toasty equates this with how men who experiment with gender-fluid fashion are often seen as.

In 2016, he created a beautiful segment called ‘Sui Generis’ (Latin for ‘one of a kind’) when he tried breaking the ceiling of conventional beauty. He chose Huffman as his muse for the shoot, and the result was beautiful.

(Source: Ganesh Toasty/ Facebook, TheBlackPearlPhotography/Facebook)

Toasty believes that though the industry is gradually broadening its mind, clients continue to be conservative. “Many still want conventional faces,” he says. Far from being an insipid experiment, the photographer insists that androgynous modelling is rather just “comfortable fashion”. As a fashion photographer, he feels it is important to admire beauty in all its manifestations. And with “Lem” (Lemuel), “it was love at first sight” for Toasty.

(Source: TheBlackPearlPhotography/Facebook)

Huffman broke conventions with his winged-eye make-up and sultry marsala hued-pout in Toasty’s Sui Generis. Now that there is more awareness about LGBTQI, a lot more people of the community have come out and are inspiring others to make similar fearless choices, he says. In one of Toasty’s shots, the 26-year-old is posing with faux fur twirled over his body, bronze hair styled into a side puff, looking dreamily yet fiercely into the camera – almost like an embodiment of the fearlessness he is talking about. Modelling for about four years now, Huffman prefers being a photographer’s model than walking the ramp.

(Source: TheBlackPearlPhotography/Facebook)

IS GLOBAL ACCEPTANCE ACTUALLY MORE THAN IN INDIA?

While Rodricks says the concept of androgyny is new to the West, Toasty and Dey are of the opinion that unlike closer home, there are more androgynous models in the international fashion scene because the industry is more receptive.

However Michael Tintiuc, from the European country of Moldova who began modelling in 2007, says ‘androgynous fashion’ is one of the fake trends “that was created by the fashion industry some five-six years ago”. “After it, came a new trend, in which shaved-headed model guys with a face that is not disfigured by intellect, wore sports-wear and sandals with socks. Now those, who mimicked androgyny, changed into sports-wear and shaved their heads clean,” he told indianexpress.com. Having ventured into modelling at 18, Tintiuc wasn’t initially successful. “The look of a tall, skinny, long-haired skater in tight pants was not in demand and looked quite different in comparison to the big, muscular men who were successful in the Russian fashion modelling scene then,” he says.

(Source: Michael Tintiuc)

Yet, Tintiuc agrees that this is a niche look and most times doesn’t fit the requirements of the labels and brands looking for a “standard look”. Now 28, Tintiuc, whose look was once described as “edgy and rock ‘n’ roll”, has been a part of many runway shows in New York, Paris, Milan, London and Tokyo for various labels like Z Zegna, Ann Demeulemeester, John Varvatos to name a few and featured in magazines such as Vogue Italia, Grazia, GQ, etc.

(Source: Michael Tintiuc)

Internationally, Miles McMillan, RuPaul Andre Charles, Andreja Pejìc, Erika Kinder, etc., have carved themselves a place in androgynous fashion. Closer home, a few like Alvares, Huffman and Dey are still paving the way for others.

(Source: File Photo)

India has a history of men wearing jewellery and floral, flowy silhouettes and even now have them lining their eyes with surma. Yet, is it too sensitive about changes that could challenge its masculinity? Or can an eccentric Ranveer Singh in a kilt, eyes kohled and holding a boombox purse save the day?

For all the latest Lifestyle News, download Indian Express App

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My Week in Manga: December 26, 2016-January 1, 2017

My News and Reviews

Happy New Year, everyone! 2016 may now be over, but there’s still a little time left to enter Experiments in Manga’s December giveaway. Tell me a little about your favorite tournament manga or tournament story arc by Wednesday for a chance to win the first omnibus of Tadatoshi Fujimaki’s Kuroko’s Basketball. Also posted at Experiments in Manga last week were my random musings about some of the notable manga, comics, and other books that debuted in 2016. Despite there being three posts last week (which hasn’t happened in a very long time!) I actually wasn’t online much at all. As a result, I probably missed out on some interesting reading and announcements, so do let me know if there was anything particularly cool. One thing that I did see though was an interview with Kabi Nagata, creator of My Lesbian Experience with Loneliness which is scheduled to be released in English by Seven Seas later this year (and which I’m really looking forward to).

Quick Takes Bungo Stray Dogs, Volume 1 written by Kafka Asagiri and illustrated by Sango Harukawa. The Armed Detective Agency specializes in the dangerous cases that the Japanese police and military either won’t or can’t handle. It’s a team of uniquely skilled individuals who have abilities that seem to come right out of fiction, but the “good guys” aren’t the only ones with formidable powers. While there are names that a more casual reader might recognize—Osamu Dazai, Edogawa Rampo, Junichiro Tanazaki, Ryunosuke Akutagawa, and so on—others, like the lead Atsushi Nakajima, are less well-known in English. (I actually happen to be a pretty big fan of Nakajima’s work.) Their supernatural talents and personality quirks are all based on their namesakes. For example, Dazai’s power is named No Longer Human and he has a penchant for attempting suicide. It’s off to an intriguing start, but I’m not sure if Bungo Stray Dogs will appeal quite as much to someone not as familiar with the literary references being made. It’s not necessary to understand them to enjoy the manga, though. So far, I am getting a kick out of the series and look forward to seeing how it develops.

Hunter x Hunter, Volumes 1-8 by Yoshihiro Togashi. I’ve been somewhat reluctant to start reading Hunter x Hunter (it might have something to do with the manga already being over thirty volumes long), but I’ve seen so much excitement and fan art for the series recently that I finally gave in. And I’ll admit, there’s a tremendous amount that I found appealing about the beginning of Hunter x Hunter. The setting is interesting, too, especially the concept of Hunters. These are people who, after putting their lives at risk to pass a grueling series of tests, are granted access to resources and information that others can only dream of. The manga largely follows Gon, a boy who wants to become a Hunter in order to find his father Ging, himself a hunter of great renown, as well as the friends and enemies Gon makes along the way. I really enjoyed the first story arc in which the candidates are trying to pass the Hunter exam. The second arc, while it serves an important purpose, I found to be a bit tedious as some of the world’s metaphysics are overexplained. However, the series quickly recovers its momentum again with clever action, intriguing characters, and drama.

Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid, Volume 1 by Coolkyousinnjya. Out of Seven Seas more recent monster girl manga, Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid is the one that I was most interested in. For one, I happen to really like dragons. It also doesn’t hurt that the series is yuri-esque and that the titular Miss Kobayashi is an adult woman working as a systems engineer. Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid features some nudity and bawdiness but for the most part it doesn’t tend to be overly-sexualized which is also refreshing. The manga can actually be surprisingly cute,  charming, and sweet. Hotaru is a dragon who has taken it upon herself to act as Kobayashi’s maid after Kobayashi saves her life. For her part, Kobayashi thought it was all an alcohol-induced dream and so is very surprised to discover that a dragon girl has made herself at home in her apartment. Why a maid specifically? It turns out that Kobayashi is a bit of a maid otaku (which becomes very clear when she goes off on drunken rants on the subject). Hotaru, who loves Kobayashi dearly, wants to do anything to make Kobayashi happy even if her efforts are somewhat awkward and frequently miss the mark.

Reindeer Boy by Cassandra Jean. I am a fan of Jean’s illustration work, and so I was very excited to learn that an original graphic novel was in the making. Reindeer Boy is based on a series of character drawings that Jean has been creating (and that I’ve been following) since 2013. The comic follows Quincy, a young woman whose life takes an unexpected turn when a group of students, all of whom have antlers, transfer into her high school. They seem to take particular interest in her, especially the flirtatious Cupid who claims they are Santa’s reindeer. Quincy’s not sure what to make of it all, but the more she gets to know them the more she likes them. Admittedly, the story of Reindeer Boy does feel like it was made to fit the characters rather than the other way around. It’s kind of a strange comic, but it’s fun, goofy fluff with a bit of romance, delightful characters, and beautiful, sensual artwork. Reindeer Boy, while telling a complete story, does seem to end rather abruptly. I’m not sure if there are plans to release any additional reindeer comics, but I’d love the opportunity to spend more time with the characters and learn more about the mythology that Jean has created.

Yuri!!! on Ice directed by Sayo Yamamoto. It’s been a long while since I’ve had the time and opportunity to marathon an entire anime series, but I knew that once I started Yuri!!! on Ice that I wouldn’t want to stop. And I was right; I love this series so much and hope that there will be a nice physical release that I can purchase in the future. The underlying story is fairly straightforward and simple: After a miserable performance at the Grand Prix, the career of Japanese figure skater Yuri Katsuki is falling apart when his idol Victor Nikiforov unexpectedly quits competing to become his coach. Yuri!!! on Ice is a series about love, passion, and inspiration in many forms. It’s also about people struggling against their selves, fighting through failure and realizing their self-worth. Yuri!!! on Ice is a tightly written and immensely satisfying show, but I do think it would have been even better if there were just a few more episodes to allow the characters and story more room to breathe. That being said, there is still some impressive character development with the series’ short span and the psychological elements are handled particularly well. Understandably, the leads receive the most attention, but I’d really like to know more about the supporting cast, too.

By: Ash Brown

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