#but for me at least its something i want to keep to myself and other people online

[crookedkryptonitebeliever]

This is just me rambling and stuff, and this is the only way i could get out my monty brainrot and a little bit of yves brainworm out of my head, but just ignore it if it's cringe or too insane

I think with the way Yves would take care of me thoroughly and know me so well would unsettle me at times, but ultimately it would probably cement his place as a comforting and caring platonic partner in my head 😭😭 cause i know i would be thinking like "oh! He's so inspiring! I think he's the perfect role model for how i should take care of myself and love the people close to me ^^" <- absolutely missing the point and every romantic gesture i would misunderstand (what lacking romantic experience does to a mf) as something he does with other ppl, even though i would imagine that he's barely seen with anyone else than his darling :'); or maybe he would account for the fact that i misunderstand things? But i have a feeling that he would catch on to the fact that I'm a bit of a blockhead

Imo i think that i would choose Monty over Yves, despite everything that he did for me; maybe because he's done so much for me, i would probably feel immeasurably guilty even if he does say he likes doing it and personally, the power imbalance in both his material and physical qualities as well as the lack of vulnerability would intimidate me 🫠🫠 errr in a way, Monty I love so much because of how loving, protective and accepting he is, he's got characteristics that are close to my type!! (might also be the fact that to some extent, he can be controlled :3); he's endearingly trying his best and flopping a lot, but at least he listens to valid criticism 🥰🥰 he's... Cute... And maybe because of the food too, since receiving and giving food is a big sign of love for me <3 His messiness is a bit of a charm to me, because personally it takes a lot of guts and vulnerability to show someone how messy you are physically and mentally, or well, maybe its pity over the depression mess 😔 One thing i want to know is if he'll ever get immune to his darling's romantic and sexual advances and throw it right back similarly? Or is still gonna be giggling and kicking his feet on the bed over it? And i wonder how his reaction would be towards a darling that starts off meek and quiet, but gets more dominant and pursues him as well? Man, i want this guy pegged <3 And to get him pregnant <3 I want to give him backshots that make him better or worse :3

Anyway, this is also a way of grieving over not choosing Monty over Cyprus 😔 because i read Cyprus first before Monty and i regret picking him for the poll 🤧 but, I'm looking forward to any potential Monty content and how this silly guy locks in or flop <3

Boy oh boy do I have the ask for you

Thanks for the ramble anon it was a good read 👍

Well Yves does act accordingly to your personality. If you are pretty clueless BUT would accept him as your ONLY romantic partner for life, he would be extremely straightforward, cutting to the chase and be clear in what he wants the relationship to be (it was exhibited in Best and Worst of Both worlds)

But if he predicts that you will reject him or eventually cheat on him later in the relationship despite all the measures to stop you from doing so, he will remain platonic. And his prediction model is horrifyingly accurate. Mans will even reject YOU if he knows you can't keep it in your pants 💔

Oh yeah if it's vulnerability you're looking for Yves is ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOT the man you're looking for homie 😭 he is THE fort knox of mental illness, you can (almost) never catch him lacking and is always locking in while Monty is human

Literally Yves isn't actually human anymore

Here are other pieces of writing that has monty in it, idk if you seen them yet but it was all clumped together with Yves's MASSIVE sections

What makes Monty wanna fuck you (the lower half of this post is just Yves waffles)

Montgomery as a dad (scroll to like half of it to skip Yves's part)

Yves isn't necessarily okay with being only a platonic yandere

#yandere #yandere oc #yandere x reader #yandere male #oc yves #yandere concept #tw yandere #yandere oc x reader #yandere x you #male yandere oc x reader #oc Montgomery

[heatsbeloved]

#self shipping #self ship community #self ship #selfshipping #f/o #f/o positivity #polls #something i was thinking about earlier #about how insular internet communities like this sometimes escape containment #and people kinda point n laugh and call it cringe #and like... on some level it IS cringe to people outside of the group #but ultimately it's harmless for the most part #but for me at least its something i want to keep to myself and other people online #i might say so and so character from such and such video game is cute but #that's about the extent of it #and i wanted to see what other people thought :)

[penisbilt]

the bittersweet but absolute flood of relief that comes from admitting defeat at living independently, to have to move back in with parents. we tried! we gave it our best shot for almost 3 years! but living like this (being on our own) is just not possible for us at this time of our lives. we've finally proved it to ourselves that we can't do it. it'll be okay to let ourselves rest now

#latimers parents not mine!!!! i am NOT moving back to florida LOL #really hope that the changes will be good for my mental health. this apartment is toxic to us #ive been on the verge of meltdowns Kind Of A Lot lately. imnot doing great #extremely dependent on substances. just to reach a baseline level of functioning. but even that isnt working as much anymore #the only things i do on my phone or tablet these days is like. 2 mobile games. and skirting past my dms to check latimers blog #its too overwhelming to even open discord these days yknow. everything on earth is too much for me right meow #i havent been drawing i havent been social online OR irl i havent been cooking or creating #i havent been keeping up with personal hygiene like at all im particularly ashamed about that one #i've been really bad about doing my T the past few months which is a HUGE shame because im SO fucking hyped to be on it #theres just. too many obstacles in getting it done half the time. and the other half of the time i just forget #anyway. anyway. #our lease ends in july so between now and then we're just gonna try our best to tolerate our living situation enough to get by #there's a light at the end of the tunnel. and its called 'i only have to be in charge of like 2 rooms at most. and not a household!' #we're gonna try to slowly comb through all our things between now and then so the process of moving wont suck as bad #cuz listen. its pretty fucking bad right now #maybe not for other people. but it is for me. and its okay to let myself come to terms with that #im just. so relieved. still very stressed! but theres at least light at the end of the tunnel and its only like 2 months away #ill be able to draw guilt-free again. ill be able to just EXIST guilt-free #i dont think ive felt guilt-free for just existing the way i do since like. turning 20 #i know my mom wouldve loved if i stayed home forever. and im sad i cant be there for her #but ever since i had a fight with my dad at 15 or 16 it just really felt like he didnt want me there more and more #maybe as the youngest he was resenting that i was preventing him from becoming an empty nester or something. i dont know #because all the other kids had been moved out and on their own at least once but i had never left home before #i dont know if he'd be heartbroken or not to hear that i feeling like he was resenting me. but thats the energy i was picking up for years #i dunno. i dont know #anyway. back to housing. for now im going to try to relax and store energy for the moving process #the huge pile of things by the kitchen? i dont have to worry about that becoming permanent because we're leaving in 2 months #the general discord of the state of our possessions? we have to go through everything to pack it all anyway. we can move in RIGHT this time #when we moved in here we didnt have a car or license so we were dependent on latimers 3-hr-drive-away parents to help us move #just /across town/. and we had a whole month between leases! but it still had to be done in a weekend

[scarletcomet]

there's really no help for feeling suicidal when you're not in immediate danger

#like i guess im just supposed to wait until i am in immediate danger?? #and even those resources are just to keep you safe. not make you not want to die #what the fuck am i supposed to do #being suicidal but not being in immediate danger really sucks #at least if i was like going to hurt myself in a life threatening way i could potentially die #but no im stuck here all because i dont want my parents to be sad #doesn't seem fair. i didn't ask to be born #i don't know what to do #how long can i feel this way and imagine all these scenarios until i do something about it? #i got really close a few nights while i was still at school #but every method has its downsides #i wish i could just not care about the effects my suicide would have on other people #i really just need to go for it #it's extremely selfish of me to say this but once i'm dead i won't care #i wish i could kill myself tonight #i wake up every morning and have to do another day. sometimes it's not so bad but i still just want to be dead #even while im laughing or snuggling with my bunny or with friends i still want to be dead #i want to kill myself #i think if i had a plan even if i was never going to go through with it i would feel better #like something to fall back onto. or just knowing it was possible #guess it's time to keep working on the pros and cons list of different suicide methods🤡 #someone please help me #people who deserve to live and want to live die all the time but i have to keep living. doesn't seem fair. #the world is a really fucked up place #sorry for not adding trigger warnings. went past 20 tags and im on mobile so i cant move them around #i dont think anyone reads these anyways.

[thecherrygod]

/

#my posts #you know how this usually goes #i make an amount of tags so that if you read this its bc you've clicked and its not bc i am just posting it like whatever lmao #... unsure if i should even post it tho but what else do i do just leave it in my brain? idk maybe its the same maybe its better #maybe its worse? .... why have i been feeling kind of like this and at this kind of intensity for like about 2 weeks or more #2 weeks is how long ive been properly aware so i think its more but like. man. #like maybe its been like a month and i just havent been keeping track of time bc january is way too long to even try lmao #. but. idk. i just wish i could be kinda.. stable. like i cant feel good lmao #like it truly doesn't matter nothing is good enough in general #what i do isnt good enough #what goes on around me doesnt help trying to ignore the constant.. dread? #and like all things considered i should be doing good currently #or at least not this bad #but here i am constantly trying to not let myself feel too bad until im alone bc man. #so... yeah it just doesnt feel like anything is truly worth it not me as a person nor the things i do nor the things i experience lmao #also lately ive been just feeling more..... disconnected to others... like i dont understand them and they dont understand me #but like.. more than usual #and i guess its me? that it's kind of a me problem #idk I'm just tired. i need to sleep. i want to let face down on some sort of big water body or do something that will make my life worse #or they i will regret lmao #i. wont do any of those #also when i mean face down in some sort of bldy of water or whatever i dont necessarily mean like die #not against it but its not the only option #just lay there and float..... also not against it #i just want something that i cant have i guess bc im not sure what it is #like i just know what i want is to not constantly feel like this but idk how lmao #... u would sleep if i can bc man also I'm so tired #.... adding tags its a bit worse than I assumed lmao im also thinking about wether i deserve stuff or not lmao #like it got windy and cooler and i was like 'a blanket by my legs would be nice' only to be like 'no you don't deserve that ' like ah yeah #its kinda worse than i thought lmao

[girlyliondragon]

Real talk the thing about making extremely complicated/complex and flawed characters (especially those greatly based off yourself to the point they're your self-created comfort character) that you've grown to be extremely proud of thinking of their stories, is that you also know that there are people out there that will absolutely villainize the fuck out of them or try to 'reason' that they are completely irredeemable even in instances where they have no control over their life and act accordingly or even are pushed into situations where they didn't want to be to begin with or are even trying to be better than they were before even when they have gone through and still go through moments of relapse like any troubled character would in an attempt to make them feel real and it actually really fucking scares me.

I can't give details, but it's like. It's obvious they, the character, aren't a good person, not as a whole anyways and aren't meant to be, in fact said character sees themselves as the worst to exist because in their eyes they deserve every bit of punishment after everything they've done because they are forced to be stuck in the past and mask themselves unhealthily due to repeated mistakes and not wanting to do them again despite making achievements to move on and be happy and despite some telling them that they're doing a good job despite everything and that they deserve to be happy and meaning it rather than trying to placate them, it's obviously up for people to decide their own perception OF that OC from what they read of their story bits to decide whether they like the character based on what they read of them or not, because flaws and shit like this is very compelling to many, myself included.

But at the same time I'm super nervous about the idea of expanding on said character and showing their maladaptive coping mechanisms and behaviors and bad moments alongside their good moments because a lot of people on the internet, especially the very loud ones have no fucking concept of the varying shades of grey morality in the slightest. Even in cases where they are in fandoms with characters with many different forms of grey morality, like it terrifies me that someone could potentially misread everything and ruin my desire to make this OC I'm vagueing about want to not only move on and be better, even if they have to start from the bottom again sometimes, but redeem and even forgive themselves in their own eyes in the process and start anew, just because people have a black/white mentality that they force onto at the expense of others doing so. It really ruins character exploration and growth.

#Wow RANT Alert #''Emerald what stemmed this?'' I was making an extremely complex and complicated sona's story (Not Sapphire's) #which is something I haven't tried to do ever since I abandoned Emi as one given the bleh I had to go through making hers work #due to outside forces making me feel like shit and like it's not a good idea #so I've finally got the balls to do it again. And even intend on being open about it or at least trying to be #but I'm scared to because people don't know how to read between the lines of what makes a good or bad character #they just automatically assume and don't try to dig or even try to understand that the character's grey for a reason #and that its their actions in the now that define whether they are capable of doing better. Not the past ones #I definitely don't want another fandom sona's story loosely based off of myself to be ruined because of bullshit like that. #since it's now turned into a story of self forgiveness and catharsis for myself which is why I'm so banged up about this #But man does it feel like a huge ticking timebomb #which is a shame because I've literally NOT done complex characters in for fucking ever since last year #I want mess and imperfection and to feel like I did a good job making said character's personal growth and backfires feel real #not feel bad for making them extremely messy and imperfect to begin with just because others don't like it #which is ironic because this character started as my ''ideal'' self. Or about as ''ideal'' as they can be in that world #only to not be and instead be more relatable to me as time went on brainstorming them #I want a character who's life closely mirrors mine. only they actually get their happy ending and can keep going with it.

[tasukete-eirin]

sometimes i look at things i write and i go "huh. my mental illness is showing"

#vent in tags #<- just to be safe idk what counts tbh lmao #GIRL WHY DID I CRY ABOUT SOMEONE CALLING A SONG FROM TWEWY MID FOR AN ENTIRE DAY?????? #why do i keep comparing myself to a houseplant that dies when things go A Little Wrong?????????? #hm. maybe i do need to get myself evaluated... #i need to get my eyes checked and go see a psych but i! am incapable! yay! <- knows getting a diagnosis can and probably will make my life #much harder #pls at least let me see if my eyes r fucked or if i am. pls. #optometrists aren't that expensive but it's bad to go alone i think :( #im glad people worry about me but at the same time it makes me wanna die bc like...... no..... #i should not be burdening others with my issues... ya'll have your own lives and issues.... #bleh. subjecting myself to the mortifying ordeal of being known sucks #i think its kinda funny that my internet friends always know more about me than my own parents... #but it's not like my parents ever take an interest in me anyway lmao #when i said i wanted to study jp i only got a very sarcastic 'good luck' like... i was at least hoping they might offer to buy me something #to study off of... but they like never take an interest in me anyway lmao #they weren't even here for my birthday. and made plans over new years without me knowing #i only learned when i asked to go see my family for new years bc they hold a celebration and this might be the last time i can go #for like... 4 years. and i don't think i can take myself bc the route is over very windy mountain roads :( #and i... do not trust myself that much in the car... and it hurts me to drive even the 10 mins to and from school sometimes... #my knee and ankle get stiff and my hip starts to hurt... its bad :( #it sucks tho i miss my family i'm lucky if i see them once a year... but its not like the adults give a shit. #sighhhhhhhhhhh. ugh. my life isn't even that bad by a lot of standards so i feel shitty for whining about it #like yeah my parents don't really care about me but at least they feed me and haven't hit me since i was little? #idk man. i should stop talking i think.

[frecklystars]

!!!! my first anniversary with Heatwave is July 17th!!! I gotta be ready!!! I gotta be prepared!!!! If nothing else I *NEED* to draw something for this one. Heatwave is one of my most main beloved F/Os who I think about everyday and I’d feel sooo bad if I couldn’t do anything for us ;n;

#woof #love notes #💕♫♪ I’d walk through fire for you ♡ Just let me adore you! ☆🚒🔥 #:( he's so important to me i love him so much #he's like... next to starscream... probably my next main transformers F/O #besides bumblebee...................... #ughghghughgghhh #if steve were on cameo i'd probably ask for something cheesy #and then he'd do it perfectly and i'd give him more money as a tip like always #and then he'd say keri you don't have to give me a tip and i'd message back saying i insist #and then he'd say thank you and a bunch of other nice things #and then he'd give me a starscream voice clip w/o me even asking bc he's nice!!! #but that will never happen again and i want to slam myself into the sun #ITS UP TO ME TO MAKE MY OWN DAMN ANNIVERSARY THINGS #i couldnt celebrate starscream's or beetlejuice's or literally ANYONE this year #but by god!!! i will draw!!! something!!! for heatwave!!! or at least write something!!! #but writing is so much harder than drawing for me so i will just scribble #i cannot fail my firetruck husband #I CANNOT #after everything he has done for me!!! to keep me going!!! i owe him this!!! #we will have our goddamn picnic in blossom vale!!! and kiss!!! and look at LITTLE BIRDS #AND TALK ABOUT OUR FEELINGS IN THE COMFORT AND PRIVACY OF OUR DATE SPOT #AND KISS SOME MORE!!!!! AND ALSO BRING DONUTS WITH SPRINKLES #AND HOLD!!! HANDS!!!! 😤😤😤😤😤😤

[kermitheefrog]

the supermacs in heuston station even has the same gaa sports crowd mural we have in ours??? like what does it have to do with tasty and tempting food at.superMACS

#ive never been in here its surprisingly big. now time to sit here for 3 1/2 hours for herto be done work so we can catch a bus to get pints #I already feel sick probs bc i ate no real food today just a latte n pastry n now a big dirty pizza slice #<< is lack toes and taller ants. idk why i do this to myself couldve easily got something but i made eye contact with the pizza man so. #felt bad walking away so had to buy summit but fucking hell 4.50 for a big slice of cheese n crust likeeeeeee #the other pizzas all had some kind of pork on them as well so had to get margarita :-( literally feel so sick fml #hopefully I'll feel better in 3 to 4 hrs when I have to get my bus 😭 #kind of wanted her to cancel on me judt so I could go home 😭 but no for once she's actually keeping her word fml #ugh her not bf is so annoying like hes cishet and had his middle finger up in a group pic with all her friends are you twelve. #at least he's cute. he seems like he has the worst personality tho. anyonr who makes those cringe mommy jokes should be locked up. #whatever. can't wait to be drunk. can't wait to see her either :-))))) it's been like three weeks #wow that sure was a lot of nothing. if u read this far make sure to like n subscribe.

[be-good-to-bugs]

AAAAH forever stress is going to kill me one day

#the bin #i hate knowing why i feel so bad and not being able to do anything about it #im scared that ill never ever feel better. its been so long since i felt ok. im worried that ill make friends and still feel horrible all #the time and it wont matter. i cant keep doing this. im so tired of being all alone. im so tired of the constant inescapable dread #im going to figure something out. in a month ill be moved and i can start figuring everything out then #i hate not being able to focus on anything besides how bad i feel. i cant enjoy anything. theres so many shows i wanna watch but i cant #because im so distracted by this. theres so much manga i wanna read and i cant. #literally the ONLY thing that has been able to make me temporarily forget this for any amount of time is dungeon meshi #its so fucking good and it sparks so much joy that it does help but not enough. i get sad again really fast. #well. im trying really hard to manage my stress. i did the math on how much i should be getting. i know that i will have rent at least. #there are 2 weeks that i dont know what my hours will be but assuming i get 13 hours at least then i should have an ok amount for #moving. its possible theyll be worse and its possible theyll be better. im really hoping theyre better. my hours have been SO BAD recently #i dont know why. i know im not bad at my job or anything. i sont think my manager dislikes me either. he does this whenever someone #hasnt been feeling well and hell do it for a couple weeks and i think its him trying to be considerate but i have bills to pay man #technically there is a shift i could pickup but the store has a drive thru so im nervous to bc idk how that works and if im asked to do that #then ill have no idea so ive been avoiding taking any shifts like that #hopefully enough will pop up in the coming weeks and i can get some more hours. i know i can cover moving vehicle cost but idk how much #gas is gonna be so im suuuuper worried abt that. hhhh. hopefully my sister and her boyfriend can get me back the $300 they owe too #honestly idk how they werent able to afford rent but immediately after they were able to afford a 40 hour roadtrip and yimw off work #whatever. it doenst matter. #i wish i could deal with the other stuff messing me up rn but i cant fix the loneliness thing without not being alone and i cant fix that #it doesnt matter how much i tell myself ill make friends eventually or if i believe it or not. i feel bad because ive gone way too long #not hanging out with anyone and my brain cant handle it. #im gonna see if maybe i can play a game with my sister soon. or maybe i couod play smth with my younger sister even #i pkayed roblox with her for a little while. maybe she would want to again. i miss her :(

[bmpmp3]

speaking of genbu's "serious" sounding tone in his voicebank, i think that might be why he was such a dead ringer for teto pre-synthv-bank-release with just a couple little gender parameter tweaks. wait do my followers know this. sorry i know most of my vocal synthesizer talk is genuinely gibberish to my beloved and loyal long time followers but do you guys know this. for a few years, people had discovered that since utau teto and genbu have this similar strong enunciation and dark sounding tone plus teto can have a bit of a tomboyish edge to her voice anyway -> if u mess with some parameters and phonemes he'll sound close enough to her, so it became a bit of running gag in the community, along with just being a genuine and novel use case for his voicebank. actually recently i found out about someone who made a couple of synthv scripts to set genbus voice to his falsetto pitch and set the tension to drop during each syllable automatically to make him sound like the utau sora amaha. genbu's purpose is to impersonate other vocal synthesizers

#i wasnt familiar with sora until i found that video. apparently she's voiced by lon? like that lon? like the utaite? #which is really neat! every day i find out about another utaite or seiyuu or someone who is involved with vocal synths in some fashion #im still reeling from anju inami providing the voice for a cevio bank! oh and the other day #i learned that the utaite kano was involved with the japanese version of luo tianyi #only to clear up some pronunciations - most of the bank is apparently the original provider. but its really interesting! #also jk jk genbu i love you. you are youre own vocal synth. you dont have to be her (teto). be yourself!!!!!! #i do love when people make teto and genbu have beef though. its so funny to me #tbh ive never been a teto user. shes not bad or anything i just never had any desire to use her utau bank. i keep her sv lite around tho #just in case i feel like making her bully genbu or something. bully that grown ass man #wait is she older or younger. i forgot how her fucked up chimera age worked again. oh well. whether ur 30 or 16 u can still bully him <3 #its a family activity. fun for all ages! anyway yeah i was never much of a teto user. tbh i think its just because like #if i want to hear a teto cover someone else probably has already done it far better than i could even think to LOL #i like when other people use her! sasuke haraguchi's use of her in hitomania and igaku has been magnifique #but i think with vsynths i prefer to use voices i like that no one uses much LOL #gives me much more drive to make covers if i know im one of the few doing it HJKDSLJ #whenever i get tired to pitchbending fast syllables (my least favourite part LOL) i think to myself.... i must.... i must.... #do it for him (genbu)..... hes not very popular since hes not the only male japanese voice anymore..... i must do it for HIM!!!!!! #(tunes one phoneme and explodes on impact)

[kethabali]

i continue to be surprised how our body, minds, and universe align perfectly sometimes and we get just what we needed even if we don't realize we needed it

#someone asked me for money and i didnt have cash and they asked if they can have my food so i just took them to the store and bought them #something to eat and talked a bit which was very needed bc i been in a downer the last 2 days #freezing up from my workload of house work and school work #so i just not been doing either of it really #only the basics of eating and cleaning myself (somewhat) but i went out today to get a charger for my weed pen or to buy another pen #and thats when i saw her so that was good #first iw as like maybe god is real or something cuz how that keep aligning like that but then i realized i made the choice to talk to her #and buy her food.. it was literally me who made it happen not gOd #so yea i still am not re believing in god at least not the institutional organized religion god #cuz that guy is pure evil he is the real devil im telling you #but i do believe our souls know what we need and try to make it happen regardless of our circumstances #anyways.. gonna watch a really gorey movie now instead of reading for school #i do want to read but at the same time i do not want to read #i want to read not today but i Have to read today and tomorrow bc its due on tuesday #and i wanna go to a protest tomorrow so mainly i have today and half of tomorrow and a bit of tuesday #which is not enough for my adhd ass to do this how i want so it will probably be rushed #unless i take somehthing else out of the schedule but i really wanna go to the protest GRR i hate capitalism #just let me do things how i wanna do it im pissed off again #why i gotta do things on other peoples schedule all the goddamn time this is my least favorite thing about capitalism #never being able to do things when i wanna do them cuz there are consequences for if i ignore the other things #i just sometimes wanna be like fuck it let me just take the consequence and do what i want but that never went well in high school #i guess i can read 2 pages or something #or die. just kidding.. haha.. im trying not to answer die or death anytime i am inconvenienced #🧃

[boy-armageddon]

you ever realized how wrong you were about an album

#listened to this adultery is ripe for the first time in. a while #MAN. MAN #I was SO mean to it for no reason it’s honestly really good #idc if it’s ‘amatuer’ idc ‘objectively their weakest album’ #WHO. CARE!!!!! #i completely forgot time for tenderness existed btw. god everything hurts so bad #they honestly have no ‘least favourite albums’ for me #i might like some slightly less. but they’re all in the age area of being fucking amazing and cool and awesome for me #*same area not age area LOL #anyway. what I mean to say is #i was very very wrong about this adultery and I #am mad at myself for being like ‘oh I hate it a lot lol’ about it #like genuienly. I don’t get past me #yeah doctor doctor’s intro is pretty long. its still really good and frankly #I like the drawl so bad with Whitney’s vocals in their early stuff so this is good for me #and also. why did I hate on the title track that much #because it’s not bad really. sure I like it slightly less than some of the other songs #but i liked listening to it! #i don’t really dislike something unless I actively want it to stop and I have to make myself keep listening #also also super super side note #jennifer and Cecilia & the silhouette saloon are like half sisters to me #do you understand my vision #I love both songs very much btw #obvs I love Cecilia. Cecilia Moore exists and all and she’s semi inspired by that song #mainly in a more literal sense though but eh #im rambling ehre its 1 in the morning I need to sleep #alas. more tbb posts to post #evil neighing compilation

[toastsnaffler]

been wanting to work out all day so I did when I got back even tho it was just for 20 mins bc i still have period cramps but all its done is make me jittery + on the Brink of extremely angry

#I DONT EVEN HAVE ANYTHING TO BE MAD ABOUT MY MIND KEEPS TRYING TO MAKE SHIT UP STOPPIT #i need a fucking punching bag in my room or smth im going to start biting #and ive JUST managed to boot out all the stupid insecure drivel ive been letting fill my head rent free bc im SICK of it #but now my brain desperately wants me to be insecure so i can justify getting angry at other ppl when rly theres NO EXCUSE #im going to backflip off the roof. can i just be normal for once please #bitches with emotional dysregulation issues be like: #at the very least. i genuinely seem to be managing it well enough to not affect other people so thats something #earlier my flatmate was talking abt seasonal depression and was like at least u dont rly get that right? #like hoooooly fucking shit my masking has clearly hit a new unprecendented high #i think shes a bit immune to reading me emotionally but even so #i have so little control over how i feel but at least its self contained. like as long as theres that i can deal with fucking anything #god knows i have! anyway. gotta get my shit ready for work tomorrowww its my 1 month appraisal im gonna Shit Myself #gonna read a bit and try to calm this over i wanna go to bed early but i wont be able to sleep if im still running this hot #slams my head into the doorframe. OKAY BYE #.diaries

[todayisafridaynight]

Tsuma is an INSANE one to start on but also a fantastic one... I think my first was SP so it's so funny we've "traded" those specific shows lmao BUT YEAH. YEAH. I BELIEVE YOU. I'M GONNA BE NORMAL ABOUT KEISUKE BUT NOT ANYTIME SOON. Tsutsumi's Princess Peach lips every time Maida squishes his face 😭😭😭😭😭

The moment outside the school basically condenses everything about the show for me it's so perfect and cute but I'm INTERNALLY SCREAMING AT ALL OF THIS BEING SAID OUT LOUD... PLEASE... YOU'RE GOING TO END UP ANOTHER IMPRISONED TSUTSUMI... He really is SUCH a malewife though that's what destroyed me frame one... especially because he's really similar to how Tsutsumi talks about himself so like perfect casting I hope he had fun with the role... Definitely continuing when I can are you kiddinggggg

Well Hopefully You Still Think AtR's Cute And/Or Sweet Wherever You're At Now So The Rest Of This Isn't Embarrassing LGSKFJLGJ BUT YEAH... YEAH... I'm aro myself so all that's Complicated right, and definitely something I tried to consider when Sorta-Not-Really-Recommending, but it's good to hear it can be entertaining even without being able to relate :']

THAT COULD'VE GONE /WAY/ SOUTH AT THE PANEL but I'm glad everyone made it out unharmed😭😭😭BUT YEAH... at the end of the Ohashi arc when Ogata threw all his stuff off the desk and the gang just wordlessly put it back for him 'cause that's all they can do... ough. Momence. That's why it was so sick watching everything fall into place [temporarily]. Also appreciate the Jo-ism in doing all the dirty work for a politician in the family and wanting to be stopped without saying it upfront and uhhhhh being fine with dying and/or going to prison LMAO

OH BUT NO PROB it is always tradition for me to send the translated letter once I've indoctrinated someone new :] funny thing is every single version I've sent is different because I've been editing it to this day

AGAIN i chose tsuma cause the title was Utterly Insane and i just had to see for myself what the fuck was going on and im so glad i did... funny that we did trade first-watches (and fun that i get 'my own version' of ogata's letter lmao) :)

BUT YEAHYEAH keisuke's adorable.. like genuinely i think he's tsutsumi's cutest role ive seen so far its hard for me to imagine one topping it in regards to how endearing he is (❁´◡`❁) keisuke being so enamored by his wife but being So Blind To How Things Look is genuinely super funny. like poor guy really is just super happy to have his wife back in a way but not yk (╯▽╰;;; )

Horribly i think of okita from that Taboo movie when it comes to consuming media: even if i dont personally have that experience or understand 100%, i can still appreciate a good story and characters (im paraphrasing SO hard and with less homophobia </3), so if you got anythin good throw it my way anytime ♪(´▽｀) !! i'm about to start episode eight in a bit but NO WORRIES i still very much am a fan of the show !! and im sad/excited to see im almost done with it ( sad its almost over, but also SUPER interested to see how everything comes together in the end (☆▽☆) )

#long post #snap chats #tsutsumi drinking game where you have to guess his chara either ends up dead in jail or Somehow Ok ☠️☠️ #keisuke's such a dork... he's literally such a puppy of a man right down to being Stupid Loyal it warms my heart (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ) #i LOVEE it when takae squishes his face cause I Repeat... he does look super cute and silly... #that's literally all i can say about him He's Cute And Silly and it's why he's one of my fave tsutsumi roles #the best things in life are cute and silly.... its why i love kirby... #now i wonder about how tsutsumi talks about himself if keisuke reminds you of him... inch resting... but i believe its a perfect casting.. #BUT ANYWAY YEAH NO the one thing i like about psychology is that it helps me understand people more #or at least im more willing to investigate why X and Y is a thing for Z yk #so Again even if i havent personally experienced something or get it from a Personal perspective i can still work out how other people feel #and just immerse myself and still enjoy the media :) #AH BUT YEAH THE BIT WHERE OGATA THROWS ALL HIS STUFF ON THE GROUND lit the peak ABSOLUTE Top Ten momence #cause Yeah No we're ALL frustrated for him at this point with how much he keeps getting shot down for actually trying to do his job #but not do his job TOO well no cause God Forbid THAT happens i guess. again makes it hard to be mad at him for being out of pocket lmao #IN ANY CASE im gonna go do somethin quick then im gon finish AtR either within the next two hours or at least this morning BYE #birthday went fine nothing too remarkable happened other than my sis and her boyfriend made pizza and it was real good #then they my bro and i all played smash bros and i was trying my best Not to play too seriously cause ik my sis and her bf dont game much #but my bro and i do and i at least wanted to give em a chance to have fun ☠️ alright ima go take care of That Thing BYE

[xjulixred45x]

I could't contain myself guys sorry--

Bro, do you realize how scary it would be to have Vox as a Yandere?

just imagine it. You could be one of his workers, maybe too good at your job, because not only do you do what Vox tells you without asking questions, but you also know what to say and what not to say to avoid a "tantrum" from him. or rather, when his insecurities attack with force like when Alastor returns.

Vox would probably be a somewhat condescending yandere (as seen with Val) but don't think you can't turn tables easily, if you stroke his ego enough, you can have him around your finger. but that doesn't make it any less dangerous for those around you.

He makes the typical 180 degree turn in attitude when it comes to Other Employees and when it comes to You. Damn, you may be the only one of his employees who gets paid vacations (or even vacations) or even birthday bonuses, things like that. He likes to give you his things or products with the excuse that "they are for testing" even if they have already been released on the market.

Like:

Vox: who the fuck eat My leftovers!?! WHENEVER WHO WAS I'M GOING TO-

Darling: it was me sir.

Vox:--give You the rest and take You out for lunch, You haven't eaten in the whole day AGAIN, didn't ya?

He definitely avoids conflict with you by hypnotizing you, when he starts to feel hostility, fear on your part or that you want to leave, he makes you "out of nowhere" have "ONE MORE TASK" and you can't help but do what he says.

and IT IS NOT just to avoid fights or for you to leave, it is something CONSTANT (once every two days MINIMUM), although Vox is not worried about your brain turning into mush due to its powers, it always keeps nutritious things in your diet and they come out relatively often , as you have to follow him everywhere.

Eventually he becomes more clingy and needy in this case, it's practically not that he's proposing to you or anything, he's just slowly dragging you into a relationship without you realizing it (because you're not lucid enough). Unless you develop a higher level of tolerance to his hypotonic trick, I don't think you'll notice his Red Flags.

I think it would be ESPECIALLY BAD if Darling is also a Sinner, because then they wouldn't even be able to get out of the pride ring to run away from Vox. leaving you with many fewer options and having to avoid all of Vox's technology, which you could only achieve by 1- going to the Cannibal Legion or 2- going to the Hazbin Hotel.

Running away is EXTREMELY DIFFICULT, not only because of his hypnotic trick, but because he literally has EYES EVERYWHERE, on every screen in hell. If you somehow manage to get away with it and run away, Vox would be SO ANGRY and looking for you all over hell with their screens.

Although definitely if you were gone more than a day, he would be more distraught than angry and would begin to despair. Even Val and Velvet would give him a hand because of how bad it would be.

Just imagine, thinking that you finally lost sight of Vox's search drones, without realizing that you stand in front of some store and VOX ITSELF appears on the screens :)

If you made the stupid decision to go to the Hazbin Hotel, Vox would be distraught and would even think that Alastor was somehow holding you hostage, obviously! Why would you go there if you knew his biggest enemy was there? Alastor must be using you as a bargaining chip! How dare he!?

(in this case, fortunately, the punishment is much less severe, but he would definitely monitor you for the rest of your life)

When he eventually gets you back (after a few days or even WEEKS of anguish) expect, first of all, to be in a mortal embrace that lasts AT LEAST 2 days and then receive your "punishment" which would be to be under hypnosis for AT LEAST 1 YEAR to be sure that this NEVER HAPPENS AGAIN.

Although calm down! He gives your mind breaks periodically because 1- he doesn't know if that would ultimate mess with your head and 2- it's nice to hear YOU talk instead of the robotic version.

When that year FINALLY ends, you will be a much more obedient, more terrified, sweeter version of You, according to Vox, like a frightened Deer. It was a long and hard process, but the good thing is that you don't have to do anything anymore! absolutely! Just do what he tells you and everything will be fine.

Shares, reglogs and comments are very welcome!

Not one of the Best yanderes to have, but Def not the worst

#headcanons #drabbles #fem reader #neutral reader #male reader #hazbin hotel x reader #hotel hazbin #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel vox #hazbin vox #vox x reader #yandere vox #yandere hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor